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BETA USER: Is this feature working? When I add a link I get an error that says "URL cannot be more than 255 characters."
ME (biting my tongue): Hi ****, Yes it works. The link you're trying to add is too long. Please try a shorter URL.
BETA USER: Oh, it should tell you that!
😳🤪🤬11 -
A small story on digitalization
I had spent an hour in the bank with my dad, as he had to transfer some money. I couldn't resist myself & asked:
Dad, why don't we activate your internet banking?
''Why would I do that?'' He asked, ''Well, then you wont have to spend an hour here for things like transfer.
You can even do your shopping online. Everything will be so easy!
I was so excited about initiating him into the world of Net banking.
He asked, If I do that, I wont have to step out of the house?
''Yes, yes''! I said. I told him how even grocery can be delivered at door now and how amazon delivers everything!
His answer left me tongue-tied.
He said ''Since I entered this bank today, I have met four of my friends, I have chatted a while with the staff who know me very well by now.
Two years back I got sick, The store owner from whom I buy fruits, came to see me and sat by my bedside and cried.
When u r Mom fell down few days back while on her morning walk. Our local grocer saw her and immediately got his car to rush her home as he knows where I live.
Would I have that 'human' touch if everything became online?
I like to know the person that I'm dealing with and not just the 'seller'. It creates bonds. Relationships.
Does "online" deliver all this as well?
Technology isn't life #BeHuman
For those who are not getting the context, this things happen in India. It is truth not a fact.19 -
I was just thinking... The JetBrains devs must enter the office and be like:
"Today I'm gonna program a programming program for others to program, and I'll do it on the programming program I programmed last year."4 -
Our Adobe Illustrator teacher(he taught us a bit of Photoshop before), tasked us with entering a contest for a logo design. The company's name is synonymous to amber in my mother tongue, but instead of it doing something related to that they partnered with T.V. services etc and are doing things in the field. The limitation of the contest is that we have to use a specific color in the amber range(given with the CMYK and Pantone values), and if the design ends up a success, one gets nearly 500$.
I have an idea, but I don't know how I will be going about doing it. I'm not great at either design or drawing. My skills in drawing don't match up with my ideas...
I'll still try it.14 -
Why is the contributing manual of your open source project more thoughtfully cultivated than your code style guide and testing procedure?
Why the fuck do you care about the message in my PR, or even merge vs rebase of commits, when your spaghetti-tomatosource is so richly saturated with critically minced bugmeat?
Why are you standing there, shouting at me about your convoluted rules, in your little brown uniform? Why do I feel like the enemy when I contribute a useful fix, something which makes the code work better?
You know what, fuck all of you, you jilted acetous neckbeards, I will deploy my secret weapon, I will bypass the power you hold over your tiny fascist digital dominions.
If you play it like this, I will summon the nefarious vile side of Open Source. I will usurp your throne. I will stab out your crying eyes, rip out your conceited tongue, impale your lonely heart.
Tremble before me! I wield the almighty, legendary Fork!
The king is dead, long live the king!5 -
How can you defend your ugly unstructured mess of a PR, when every spit-droplet infused spray of words from your mouth is full of syntax errors?
How can you call yourself a developer without being aware of basic logic? I ain't got no tolerance for double negations, not not true is just true, you doltish twat.
WHEN YOU TALK THERE IS A CLOUD OF RED SQUIGGLY LINES IN THE AIR FLOATING AROUND YOUR HEAD.
I mean what the fuck is up with eggcetera? Why are you just swapping out letters? What has the little ligature t in & ever done to you? Do I have to fucking replace & with 🥚 so your word diarrhea makes sense again?
NO. JUST PLEASE... STOP TALKING. YOU'RE RAPING LANGUAGE, AND IT WAS ALREADY BEATEN DEAD.
Unlike me, you have a degree in computer science... but how, how the fuck did you pass? How did neither your tongue nor code get stuck in a linter?
AND YOUR RESPONSE IS STILL: "YOU DON'T NEED TO LEARN WHEN YOU'RE FINISHED WITH SCHOOL" ... "WHAT DOES IT MATTER, IT WORKS, RIGHT?"
NO, IT'S NOT RIGHT.
You're lucky I love refactoring.
I'll start with a medical grade steel scalpel and a long sharp hook. Maybe I can clean up this brain a little. See if the tests turn green if I cut some of this gray matter away... plenty of unreachable statements, so many unnecessary loops...
Might have to start from scratch.8 -
Ok... Indentation styles.
Usually I'm an advocate for letting people program how they want as long as it's readable, etc.
But I'm training somebody at the moment and had to bite my tongue when they started doing this...
5 -
My team is quite international and although we speak English among ourselves, most people still comment their code in their mother tongue.
I have learn a lot from reading my colleagues code. Mainly curse words from all over the world. It's great.14 -
Tomorrow's my last day.
There is no exit interview scheduled. I'm not surprised, there hasn't been any 1-on-1's in about 2 years, and any feedback or complaints are never addressed.
Just need to bite my tongue for one more day.1 -
Yall know those small biscuits, with half of them covered in chocolate? I mean why half? Cover it all, or leave ot naked, but this way i cant be sure which is the chocolatey side to put on my tongue in the dark. Its a complete gamble.
...yeah im getting fat8 -
People working on the "breakthrough Tongue Detection" for "animojis" at Apple Inc. must be telling their relatives they are drug dealers. I mean what could be more embarrassing than this.4
-
Two weeks into our fresh new Android app my colleague decided to define 1dp dimension unit in dimens.xml:
<dimen name="dimen_1dp">1dp</dimen>
During my code review I asked him if there was no better name for it as it's simply overstating the obvious and does not scale well for other resolutions. He didn't understand what I meant so I said would you then define this for xxdpi
<dimen name="dimen_1dp">4dp</dimen> just because you need more padding on higher density screens?
Then he goes on for 10 minutes how he thought about other names (doesn't say which ones) and still decided to stick with this one.
I politely heard him out and made it abundantly clear that I disagree with that naming (not the value). And I also backed up my point by saying that what he did is exactly the same as defining a color in colors.xml like this:
<color name="color_FFFFFF">#FFFFFF</color>
Then he frowned and said (paraphrasing): Noooooooo, that is so wrong. I would never do that. It's not the same as what I have done.
Then he again started defending his point which probably would have gone for good 10 minutes except I literally bit my tongue and walked away from my desk hoping he wouldn't follow as I was dangerously close to punching him!
Fucking enganeers!!!2 -
I don't know what non-German people do without ubuntuusers.de.
Without this wiki, I probably would know nothing about Linux today. I would have never been introduced to it as a child, would never been able to learn that much, play around with desktop Ubuntu, Raspberry Pis, administrate own servers...
So, thank you, ubuntuusers.de, for helping little Benedikt with Ubuntu in his mother tongue, and making me the Linux enthusiast I am today!6 -
So ok here it is, as asked in the comments.
Setting: customer (huge electronics chain) wants a huge migration from custom software to SAP erp, hybris commere for b2b and ... azure cloud
Timeframe: ~10 months….
My colleague and me had the glorious task to make the evaluation result of the B2B approval process (like you can only buy up till € 1000, then someone has to approve) available in the cart view, not just the end of the checkout. Well I though, easy, we have the results, just put them in the cart … hmm :-\
The whole thing is that the the storefront - called accelerator (although it should rather be called decelerator) is a 10-year old (looking) buggy interface, that promises to the customers, that it solves all their problems and just needs some minor customization. Fact is, it’s an abomination, which makes us spend 2 months in every project to „ripp it apart“ and fix/repair/rebuild major functionality (which changes every 6 months because of „updates“.
After a week of reading the scarce (aka non-existing) docs and decompiling and debugging hybris code, we found out (besides dozends of bugs) that this is not going to be easy. The domain model is fucked up - both CartModel and OrderModel extend AbstractOrderModel. Though we only need functionality that is in the AbstractOrderModel, the hybris guys decided (for an unknown reason) to use OrderModel in every single fucking method (about 30 nested calls ….). So what shall we do, we don’t have an order yet, only a cart. Fuck lets fake an order, push it through use the results and dismiss the order … good idea!? BAD IDEA (don’t ask …). So after a week or two we changed our strategy: create duplicate interface for nearly all (spring) services with changed method signatures that override the hybris beans and allow to use CartModels (which is possible, because within the super methods, they actually „cast" it to AbstractOrderModel *facepalm*).
After about 2 months (2 people full time) we have a working „prototype“. It works with the default-sample-accelerator data. Unfortunately the customer wanted to have it’s own dateset in the system (what a shock). Well you guess it … everything collapsed. The way the customer wanted to "have it working“ was just incompatible with the way hybris wants it (yeah yeah SAP, hybris is sooo customizable …). Well we basically had to rewrite everything again.
Just in case your wondering … the requirements were clear in the beginning (stick to the standard! [configuration/functinonality]). Well, then the customer found out that this is shit … and well …
So some months later, next big thing. I was appointed technical sublead (is that a word)/sub pm for the topics‚delivery service‘ (cart, delivery time calculation, u name it) and customerregistration - a reward for my great work with the b2b approval process???
Customer's office: 20+ people, mostly SAP related, a few c# guys, and drumrole .... the main (external) overall superhero ‚im the greates and ur shit‘ architect.
Aberage age 45+, me - the ‚hybris guy’ (he really just called me that all the time), age 32.
He powerpoints his „ tables" and other weird out of this world stuff on the wall, talks and talks. Everyone is in awe (or fear?). Everything he says is just bullshit and I see it in the eyes of the others. Finally the hybris guy interrups him, as he explains the overall architecture (which is just wrong) and points out how it should be (according to my docs which very more up to date. From now on he didn't just "not like" me anymore. (good first day)
I remember the looks of the other guys - they were releaved that someone pointed that out - saved the weeks of useless work ...
Instead of talking the customer's tongue he just spoke gibberish SAP … arg (common in SAP land as I had to learn the hard way).
Outcome of about (useless) 5 meetings later: we are going to blow out data from informatica to sap to azure to datahub to hybris ... hmpf needless to say its fucking super slow.
But who cares, I‘ll get my own rest endpoint that‘ll do all I need.
First try: error 500, 2. try: 20 seconds later, error message in html, content type json, a few days later the c# guy manages to deliver a kinda working still slow service, only the results are wrong, customer blames the hybris team, hmm we r just using their fucking results ...
The sap guys (customer service) just don't seem to be able to activate/configure the OOTB odata service, so I was told)
Several email rounds, meetings later, about 2 months, still no working hybris integration (all my emails with detailed checklists for every participent and deadlines were unanswered/ignored or answered with unrelated stuff). Customer pissed at us (god knows why, I tried, I really did!). So I decide to fly up there to handle it all by myself16 -
"Let the developers consider a conceptual design,” the King said, for about the twentieth time that day._
“No, no!” said the Queen. “Tests first—design afterwards.”
“Stuff and nonsense!” said Alice loudly. “The idea of writing the tests first!”
“Hold your tongue!” said the Queen, turning purple. “How much code have you written recently, anyway?” she sneered.
“I won’t,” said the plucky little Alice. “Tests shouldn’t drive design, design should drive testing. Tests should verify that your code works as it was designed, and that it meets the customer’s requirements, too,” she added, surprised by her own insight. “And when you drive your tests from a conceptual design, you can test smarter instead of harder.”4 -
Need to whip up a quick demo on how a site might work for an organization, so I figured I'd just use the default twentynineteen theme and customizer to get it set up.
Turns out that twentynineteen *does* *not* *have* sidebars.
Instead, all of your content is offset to the left.
And all right-floated boxes go off-margin to the right.
And this is apparently a *feature* because now you can change your sidebar on every damn page instead of setting it in one place like a good site design would dictate! (link: https://github.com/WordPress/...)
I've been trying to bite my tongue and give it a fair shot, but saying that having the only dedicated widget area in the footer and forcing you to rebuild your sidebar on every damn page you want it on is a good thing is beyond the pale stupid. If you need that level of customization on every page, you don't know what you're doing. At the very least include a sidebar and give people the option of overriding it.
And for the love of God, *don't throw the entire goddamn body content off-center claiming you're leaving space for a sidebar you're not going to provide*!2 -
Watching WWDC 2018.
Apple : "We are introducing the latest breakthrough, new Technology"
.... me: woa, cure for cancer?
" Tongue Detection"
"Now your favorite animoji can do thissss 😝😝😝"
Wwhhhhhaaatt the actual flyiingggg fucckkk is thiisss? I thought there would be flying carssss in 2018,and this cancerous crap all apple got?10 -
Not at all dev related but I don’t have a social life so I share with you guys:)
I’ve been fat for all my life. You might say it’s my own fault blah blah but I quit sugar over 10 years ago, I don’t snack and eat 1-2 meals a day, not much more than others do.
The first time I was in good shape was when I was 16. I was growing, I started boxing and I was happy-ish with my body for the first time. I got down from 110kgs to ~87kgs, which is a good weight for me, I have heavy bones and wide shoulders I guess.
I insured my shoulder and couldn’t do boxing anymore but my weight was still pretty much stable. After working in the office for a few months I started gaining weight again, I think mainly due to the stress and lack of sleep.
In 2017 for the first time I hit a new high with 120kgs. I quit my terrible, stressful 24/7 job and relocated and got down to ~115 which I maintained for quite a while (still going to the gym and stuff).
And then the lockdown started..
I went up to >120 in no time.
(Sounds really bad but as mentioned, I’m heavy anyway so I’m not THAT obese, just fat.
Seeing my weight was really scary to me so I started a keto diet again, which I did before but with limited success.
Warning: Controversial topic coming up..
I took it a bit further and tried 0-carb (carnivore diet) instead of low carb and I lost 6kg within a month. Then the next plateau at 114, then at 112 etc.
Went more strict and removed seasoning and stuff and started eating more nutritious meat, liver, heart, tongue etc and my weight started dripping again.
Yesterday for the first time in ~a decade I got down to 105kg.
My end goal is 90, so I made it half way through.
Just really happy to have achieved this. The 1 good thing about lockdown I guess, I had so much time to be on my own.
Before you say eating no greens is bad, keep in mind that most not old people die because of obesity, not because of a lack of fiber.
It’s a big achievement for me and I hope that I can get to 90kg in another 3 months..
Story over8 -
In the last 3 days I have managed to burn my tongue twice because of hot coffee and I have always wondered for which idiots they write 'caution, contents hot' on the cups.
I guess I am one of them6 -
TL;DR:
JuniorDev ignores every advice, writes bad code and complains about other people not working because he does not see their result because he looks at the wrong places.
Okay, so I am really fed up right now.
We have this Junior Dev, who is now with us for circa 8 months, so ca. a year less than me. Our first job for both of us.
He is mostly doing stuff nobody in the team cares about because he is doing his own projects.
But now there's a project where we need to work with him. He got a small part and did implement that. Then parts of the main project got changed and he included stuff which was not there anymore. It was like this for weeks until someone needed to tell him to fix it.
His code is a huge mess (confirmed by senior dev and all the other people working at the project).
Another colleague and me mostly did (mostly) pair programming the past 1-2 weeks because we were fixing and improving (adding functionality) libraries which we are going to use in the project. Furthermore we discussed the overall structure and each of us built some proof-of-concept applications to check if some techniques would work like we planned it.
So in short: We did a lot of preparation to have the project cleaner and faster done in the next few weeks/months and to have our code base updated for the future. Plus there were a few things about technical problems which we need to solve which was already done in that time.
Side note: All of this was done not in the repository of the main project but of side projects, test projects and libraries.
Now it seems that this idiot complained at another coworker (in our team but another project) that we were sitting there for 2 weeks, just talking and that we made no progress in the project as we did not really commit much to the repository.
Side note: My colleague and me are talking in another language when working together and nobody else joins, as we have the same mother tongue, but we switch to the team language as soon as somebody joins, so that other colleague did not even know what we were talking about the whole day.
So, we are nearly the same level experience wise (the other colleague I work with has just one year more professional experience than me) and his work is confirmed to be a mess, ugly and totally bad structured, also not documented. Whereas our code is, at least most of it, there is always space for improvement, clean, readable and re-useable (confirmed by senior and other team members as well).
And this idiot who could implement his (far smaller part) so fast because he does not care about structure or any style convention, pattern or anything complains about us not doing our work.
I just hope, that after this project, I don't have to work with him again soon.
He is also one of those people who think that they know everything because he studied computer science (as everybody in the team, by the way). So he listens to nothing anybody explains to him, not even the senior. You have to explain everything multiple times (which is fine in general) and at some points he just says that he understood, although you can clearly see that he didn't really understand but just wants to go on coding his stuff.
So you explain him stuff and also explain why something does not work or is not a good thing, he just says "yes, okay", changes something completely different and moves on like he used to.
How do you cope with something like this?6 -
I always wondered how it would be to have English as mother tongue.
Because :
- Insects are causing problems in computers,
- you're using a glass door or a fruit for OS (well, some of us),
- the internet is made of people bringing your glass in the restaurant,
- you navigate on the spider's fiber,
- ...
That must feel weird considering it's the same words that you use for other parts of your life7 -
Typical experience on devRant: I posted a tongue-in-cheek rant about something that I could easily fix if only I really wanted to, and I received unrequested advice after 5 seconds 😂
Then I realized that this is probably what women experience on Twitter all the time 🤔12 -
Strap in...
- Previous employer
- 3rd party partner firm
- integration link between both over SOAP
- Both sides riddled with poor code and messed up political structures (partner firm CEO is an investor in my employer)
- Doing a deployment to update to https (I know)
- Keep http endpoint live
- Other side starts shitting itself
- Diagnose
- Not us
- feelsgoodman.tiff
- Get angry email
- Explain not us
- Back and forth
- Tell client it’s “irrelevant” on https issue, it’s their side that’s gone wrong
- Get angry reply with boss cc’d about how nothing is “irrelevant” for the client
- We all had to have a make up meeting and meal
- Client was calm and reasonable, all agreed we just snapped and it wouldn’t happen again
- 2 weeks later
- Their system shits itself again and suddenly we’re on the hook
- BA on my team (smarmy little bastard) constantly fucking me off
- Get so close to actually screaming and hitting him
So yeah. I don’t tend to hold that a job is more important to me than my dignity.
I have and will never hold my tongue for the sake of a job, I’m not gonna put up with people shouting / belittling / backstabbing etc. -
Kotlin and mother tongue
In my mother tongue (my first language which is Kikuyu) we do not have the letter L in our alphabet thus meaning L and R to us is similar thus pronounced the same.
Then Kotlin makes life hard for devs who got a mother influence in their speech from my tribe. Was having a talk with fellow dev who is my tribe mate and we had an issue agreeing between val and var hehe.
We had to write it down to tell which is which.
Thankyou Kotlin for making my day.6 -
How to get the rest of the content you need to finish a freelance website...
Invoice them. They'll respond faster than a cat can lick its own ass with its tongue already on the hole.1 -
I was wondering why it had a duck when I use python, was thinking maybe it is a font issue .. which I ignored for months.
Today I say the tongue.
2 -
It's not the "age of AI" you dissecated nutsack munching buffoon, you could lick and suckle my delicious tits with that grandiose old tongue you have, if only it wasn't so profoundly infected with feces of every consistency and color.
Your word, for the two shits it's worth, is still better spent elsewhere than promoting falsehood, giving importance to that which has none, or spreading the belief that a demonstrably unscalable approach still has, somehow, room to grow. It's no fucking s*ndrome but full on imp*sterhood, truly a grand fellowship of pauseless jackoffs.
This is it -- a glorified, disobedient, largely unpredictable autocomplete. A probabilistic bullshit machine. It wouldn't be able to replace you, if only you weren't so fucking stupid.
And yes, I *am* contradicting myself by addressing the incredibly cost inefficient overclocked melting minerstack in the room, but I can hardly make the point without doing it, so shush.
Back to the stone age with this shit. Now pass the fucking joint.1 -
The best happened today.
These past 2 weeks have been shit. People wronged me big time, got thrown under the bus for shit that the people behind refused to own up to it. Took that shit because I just couldn't be bothered to fucking argue.
I'm the only dev on this project and we're so close to release so I bit my tongue and took it on the chin but it's been eating me alive since then.
The tipping point was yesterday. 5 people failed to communicate shit properly amongst themselves on all channels got me forced to be the last one finishing work yesterday 4 hours after everyone left. I had every right to refuse and leave on time but again, we're so close to release and I don't want to see this project fail.
But see, I got angry. So fucking angry that nothing else has been on my mind since yesterday.
I don't take out my anger at others, that's not who I am (moslty) so today I was at work and secluded myself from everyone else otherwise I would've exploded in someone's face.
I was also supposed to meet up with friends tonight but with all this shit going on I decided not to go because I would not have been fun to be around.
Left work on time today, fell asleep on the train because I am too exhausted.
When I was about to walk into my house I noticed this little super cute puppy following me. I had no idea where or how long he's been behind me as I was walking home but he seemed way too happy when I saw him. His tail wagging like he's excited to see me even though I have never seen him. I petted him, played a bit with him. He seemed to be the happiest dog ever 😁. He managed to put a smile on my face for the first time in the last few days.
He then ran away.. I guess he got bored 😅
I am feeling so much better now all because of this little puppy 🐶. I'm so glad I ran into him because I've been smiling since then.
I wish I had took a picture of him 😥
Doggo, you probably won't read this, but thanks mate you made my month in those few minutes 🤘
If you have a dog, go pet him and appreciate how much happiness they bring in your life. If you have a cat.. Uhh I don't know... Uhh pray it doesn't kill you in your sleep I guess?
Thanks for reading3 -
In the before times of 2019, one of the guys in the office had this habit of sucking his teeth after lunch.
I can hardly describe it. Imagine making kissy sounds but with your tongue and teeth. Did this almost every day from 1-2.
Probably happened every 1-2 minutes. So just long enough to get back into the swing and boom *thick*.
I just invested in some really nice headphones eventually.2 -
A time I (almost) screamed at co-worker?
Too many times to keep up with.
Majority of time its code like ..
try
{
using (var connection = new SqlConnection(connectionString))
{
// data access code that does stuff
}
catch (Exception e)
{
// Various ways of dealing with the error such as ..
Console.WriteLine("Here");
ShowMessage("An error occured.");
return false;
// or do nothing.
}
}
Range of excuses
- Users can't do anything about the error, so why do or show them anything?
- I'll fix the errors later
- Handling the errors were not in the end-user specification. If you want it, you'll have to perform a cost/benefit analysis, get the changes approved by the board in writing, placed in the project priority queue ...etc..etc
- I don't know.
- Users were tired of seeing database timeout errors, deadlocks, primary key violations, etc, so I fixed the problem.
On my tip of my tongue are rages of ..
"I'm going to trade you for a donkey, and shoot the donkey!"
or
"You are about as useful as a sack full of possum heads."
I haven't cast those stones (yet). I'll eventually run across my code that looks exactly like that.1 -
This basically is me rambling all my thoughts that have been clouding my mind.
Learning other programming languages after learning the first is harder than I expected. I learned python first but that's making learning others (which I know arent similar but ) C, ES6, PHP, etc. I need to figure out what makes each one special and get a proper path instead of learning them all the same way. Which is easier for the web dev languages but fuck man I just need a good path for them and I'm good. Like learn this this this this that and that and I've got a basic understanding of the language I dont need to stress and I can casually build my knowledge from here now that I understand all this. Cause I love programming and I want to be the best I can be and just get to the level I am with python. And at some point I have to learn about basic electronics and learning how to program Arduinos with C so I can do stuff with that because I really really REALLY want to.
It doesnt stop there. I want to learn another language and no I'm not talkin bout programming anymore I mean I wanna learn Japanese and German (but japanese primarily) but it doesnt help that I'm always either in school, studying, programming, or playing games. I just cant find time to practice Hiragana&Katakana (two basic writing systems in japan) and it doesnt help that I'm a lazy procrastinating piece of shit that doesnt have or can keep a proper schedule and hell I barely can English and Its my native tongue. Ugh. Itd be better if I had a native speaker to help me tbh.
And finally I want to learn basic pixel animating I have dreamed as a kid to do some kind of animation and programming and I want to do both for games I want to program for fun but it doesnt help that I cant draw sprites or anything for shit. I cant get it and I just am fucked but I'm going to ask some people I know and a few subreddits for advice/help/resources with that
Welp that was the Bubbles Power Hour none of you probably are keen followers of mine and if I had any I'd be shocked and honored but thanks for reading anyways and any advice on anything is always appreciated!11 -
I'm not going to lie, the surge of bootcamps really irks me. Not because I'm afraid of competition, or that I'm an elitest. Mainly because a lot of people who attend these bootcamps have no real interest in software engineering. I sometimes attend a meetup, and it's a beginner meetup. I try to help out. And a lot of people clearly have no patience for learning software engineering. I try to be encouraging, but sometimes I just want to be dick and tell them "Why the hell do you want to be a dev, if you're not interested in how computers work".
I'm an 100% myself taught developer. Granted I'm 38 and taught myself programming at 14. But it came out of an earnest desire and love for technology in general. So I never shyed away from learning? C and assembler? Bring it on. Theoretical computer science? I can get with that. For me I loved computer so much, that I was willing to learn about anything in the realm of computing.
This is what annoys me with the adult bootcamp crowd. I feel they're only willing to learn as long as it's easy. If something gets complicated or complex, then they check out. And I a lot of their questions is "tell me how to do this/that". But they don't know why they would do it.
To me it feels like they're trying to fast track themselves to a dev job. Yet you would think if they're trying to do this all professionally, they would be open to learning as much as possible, and not closing themselves off.
My semi-friend who runs the meetup is trying to start a bootcamp himself. So I try I severely hold my tongue when I attend those meetups. And I want to be supportive. I certainly don't want to be the reason why people are turned off by programming. But at the same time, I hate how people are abusing this profession because they think it's fast money and an easy way to earn 6 figure salaries.3 -
The mps* of the tongue must always be a little less than the mps of thought, and never the other way around.
*) motions per second9 -
Things I wish I knew when I was younger:
- no matter how clean your teeth are, bad breath won't go away until you clean your tongue. Buy a tongue cleaner and use it after you brush your teeth
- whitening toothpastes don't work, while desensitizing ones work well.
- after you brush your teeth, spit but do NOT rinse!
- when brushing your teeth, keep the toothbrush angled 45 degrees. The bristle ends should touch the area where your gums meet your teeth.
- use sunscreen every morning.
- don't waste money on acne-treating products unless they contain salicylic acid, benzoyl peroxide, tretinoin or adapalene.
- if you want to lose weight, you have to eat MORE, not less. But, that “more” should be protein.
- showering every morning feels like “humanity restored” thing from Dark Souls. Also, clean your damn room and wash your damn windows.
- APS-C DSLR cameras make no sense. For their weight, you can get a full-frame camera, and for their price you can get an APS-C mirrorless cam that will be way lighter.
- If you want a damn thing, save up and buy that damn thing. Don't buy the alternative thing you don't want. You'll be asking “what if” till you either die or buy the original damn thing.
- people aren't replaceable, but many people can fit their designated role. Not being able to replace your ex-boyfriend with his exact copy doesn't mean no one else can be your boyfriend.
- try a MacBook & iPhone as soon as you can to check whether it's your thing or not, because if it is, oh boy are you in for a treat.
- added sugar is evil, but it's beneficial for the economy. It makes you fat, so you need a car, so you buy fuel. Also, you feel guilty because you're fat, so you buy diet products & things to compensate because you hate your reflection in the mirror. You also pay medical fees to treat your newly developed health problems, and you die a day before retirement. Everyone makes a buck on you eating added sugar but you.
- you can use the freshly removed sticker to remove the sticky residue left by that same sticker.
- static typing doesn't solve jack shit.3 -
Went in for an interview today and left my brain at home. Never been so tongue tied. And as it were I was the only remaining candidate. FML!1
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Today I meet a Delphi developer... I almost choked on my tongue. Until he showed me some apps he has developed! Thought Delphi was dead!5
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I hate the process of trying to get hydrated when I’ve gone through a period of apparently thinking I’m a cactus.
When I don’t drink water at all, I feel fine. No dry mouth, no symptoms of dehydration.
I *start* trying to hydrate and it’s like my body thinks this is the best time to start giving me all those dehydration symptoms it doesn’t even bother with when I’m not drinking water because it’s just given up on me listening to them.
I drank 64 oz of water yesterday and woke up with my tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth and my throat scratchy.
I know that I need to keep drinking water in large quantities for a period of time for my body to chill the fuck out again, but words can’t describe how tempting it is to just go back to being a cactus.
Hydrating sucks.8 -
If you want to improve your life, but your mental health and energy levels are too low to exercise, start with hygiene.
Take showers every day, continuously lowering the water temperature. Use dental floss and tongue scraper. Brush your teeth twice a day. Wash your face every morning and every evening. Use evidence-based skincare products: adapalene, panthenol, SPF 50+ sunscreen. Keep your toes and nails tidy. Shave routinely.
According to Nadya Tolokonnikova, a prominent Russian dissident who was imprisoned, denying basic hygiene is a _very_ efficient way of breaking someone into submission that is often applied to dissidents in Russian prisons. So, doing a reverse of that should improve mental health. -
I have realized that I'm getting nowhere with my boss with my current attitude.
I want to change strategy, but I find it very hard to bite down my tongue and give up on being logical or the attitude of "be competent, do a good job, or gtfo of my way". Like, it's not my place to fix all the issues, neither am I perfect.
I'm not looking for methods of manipulating him, rather I want to change my own perspective and mindset to something that doesn't make me suffer. At least regarding this one person.4 -
Today I had a full-day job interview for a junior data scientist position.
First I met the team which was only like half of everyone because apparently everyone was gone on Fridays. However the few there were really nice.
First task is to do some basic data analysis stuff even though I already spent a week on the coding challenge and sent them all my code/tasks. I log into my machine and create a new virtual environment but can't for the life of me figure out how to use the command line in windows to install packages. Turns out there is some problem with their proxy and they have to log me in on that. Then I am struggling on the keyboard because it's for a language different that my mother tongue and it takes me 3x as long to so the most simple things. All my shortcuts are out the window. Haven't a hard time typing parentheses and brackets. Start freaking out and have a panic attack mid task. I'm sweating bullets. I didn't even make it to the simple visualization tasks much less the models at the end. Time gets called and we all go to lunch and I'm freaking out on the inside the entire time. Angry at myself because I know I am better and just couldn't think.
After lunch I present my code and results from a coding challenge I did weeks prior. People from other teams get invited and I end up getting grilled for 2 hours by 15 people. Questions are flying in from all sides. They ask me almost everything I know about machine learning and some more. Under stress I forgot the name of the optimizer I used and couldn't answer some easy stuff because my mind was racing.
Right now I am on the train home and my body physically hurts. I am disappointed with myself and wish I could have shown up better. Never really froze up like this before.2 -
Alright fellow sweaty programmers, mama Kiki is here to teach you the basics of hygiene.
TEETH
- If you have a toothpaste prescription, use it.
- Every single whitening toothpaste is a scam. Don’t use them.
- Every single over-the-counter toothpaste that decreases sensitivity does work. If your teeth are sensitive, use it.
- Otherwise, buy the cheapest name-brand toothpaste.
- Use dental floss. As long as it’s flat and waxed, the cheapest one will do.
- When flossing, never move the floss back and forth as if you try to saw through your gums. Just put the floss in, then out. Repeat if necessary.
- Don’t put your toothpaste on your toothbrush. Put a small amount of it directly in your mouth with a bit of water. Close your mouth and spread toothpaste all over your teeth using a rinsing motion, as if it was mouthwash. Now your teeth are completely covered.
- When brushing teeth, don’t use -90°/0°/90° angles. Use -35°/35°. This way you will spend less time while getting better cleansing. Bristle ends should touch where your teeth meet your gums.
- Get yourself a tongue scrubber. Scrub your tongue until what comes off of it is clean. Dirty tongue is why your breath smells bad, not dirty teeth.
- After you’re done, don’t rinse! Spit the toothpaste out, but let its residue stay there. The remineralization process is now started. If you follow the routine, you don’t need mouthwash at all.
- Drinking/eating sugary things, not washing your teeth and going straight to bed is the best way to get cavities ASAP. In your mouth, sugar quickly turns into the kind of acid that we use for soldering. It can strip the oxide layer off of copper. Do you know how after you drink Coke, your teeth become almost squeaky clean? That’s this. If you like sugary drinks, carefully drink them using a straw. Rinse immediately after you’re done drinking & eating.
SHAVING
- Get yourself an old-school safety T-razor, the one that takes suicide blades. It will last a lifetime. Mühle and Merkur are good manufacturers (not affiliated). Once you have it, for the rest of your life, you will only buy blades. This is the most environmentally friendly way to get a clean, close shave. Electric razors save water, but they often contain batteries.
- Because of how violently electric razor’s blades hit hair while cutting it, they chip your hair. This leads to your freshly grown hair being sharp, rough and unpleasant to the touch. The manual razor, on the other hand, produce clean edges. When your hair grows back, it will be softer than what you get with an electric razor.
- Feather brand blades (not affiliated) are the sharpest in the world. The sharper the blade, the less traumatic it is. Watch T-razor tutorials on YouTube. There are different shaving techniques that will get you a killer shave.
- T-razor blades last considerably longer than their modern soyboy single-use counterparts.
- Because of a single blade construction, T-razor almost never leaves irritation.
- Basically, modern single-use plastic blades are horrible for the environment, and they’re almost a scam for how much you get for your money. They’re only rivaled by printer ink. Use them only for intimate shaving, as they’re considerably handier down there.
- Always shave after hot shower.
- Before shaving, dry the skin surface. Apply shaving foam on dry skin only, as it contains chemicals that make your hair softer. When diluted, they’re not as effective, and shaving unsoftened hair is almost always unpleasant and dangerous.
- After applying the foam, wait about a minute for the foam to work. If the skin gets irritated, don’t wait for as long, or perhaps try a different foam brand.
- Before shaving, thoroughly clean your razor with hand sanitizer or ethanol. Ideally, it should be sterile. Using boiling hot water is also a good option, just be careful with it.
- After shaving, rinse off foam, immediately dry your skin with a clean towel, then apply aftershave. After applying it, don’t touch your skin until it completely dries. If you follow this routine, your skin won’t get any pimples, guaranteed.
- Scrubs won’t help you. Don’t use them.
More in the comments!11 -
I went to a university open day for the lecturer to tell me multiple times they used "HTML, CSS and Java" in their Web Dev course. If it was a slip of the tongue, I get that, but he said "Java" instead of "JavaScript" at least four times.
I didn't think I'd ever decline a university offer, this guy proved me wrong.17 -
So I got this thing about getting multiple units of things I like for some time. practical examples:
- Got a tattoo, then I got later 4 more(but I think getting more tattoos is pretty standard)
- got one pencil, then I bought 8 more and a can to store then
- Bought a mouse, then now I got 3. (all of them are microsoft it's one of the few things I like from MS)
- Got a laptop sleeve, I got 3 now
- Got a keychain for my car keys, now I have 6
- I got a piercing, then I got 10 more(eyebrows, ears, nose, tongue, mouth). But I removed most of them, a pain in the ass to clean all those jewels
... list goes on
I haven't been with a psychologist, but I'm guessing that could be some obsession/compulsion or I'm just pretty standard and this is kind of normal. Anyone can relate?2 -
Two bits of WORD:
{You have turned my mourning into dancing for me; You have put off my sackcloth and girded me with gladness.}
{To the end that my tongue and my heart and everything glorious within me may sing praise to You and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give thanks to You forever.}
Give thanks and praise.3 -
So... In germany, theres spring vacation. But im on a scholar exchange and in france (my mother tongue) and. Well... I need to go to school there :(1
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This week is the week of planning ahead for the whole left year upto beginning of next year.
My tongue has muscle soreness, my brains gyri are straightened out, my throat is hoarse... And talking really feels like licking a cactus.
I. Hate. Talking.
Just one more day with 8 hours of meetings.
*drools*9 -
Wouldn't it be awkward as hell if we would all only just rant in our native tongue ... Comment below your workaround, if needed 🤣9
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So I needed a break from all the straight computer logic for days... so i figured i had 2 options, argue with chatGPT or go back to a dating app.
I chose the latter.
Im ocd with notifs... i NEED the bubble to be gone.
Found this gem...
"Hey beautiful Sara ;) my names is James king it very nice 2 meet u wow u look like a angel that fall from heaven 😘u mind me of a rose because how beautiful you are am how beautiful the rose is am I the best guy on badoo that u would ever talk with on badoo I actually look for Friendship and relationship ;) how are u today am wyd"
So... because im curious, esp when it comes to perplexing linguistics... im def gonna ask if English is his 1st language.
Normally i can tell within a sentence or 2... even tend to know their native tongue by then... this one has me stumped.
Anyone wanna guess if hes a native English speaker???
Maybe ill make a modest prize poolif there's a few entrants.
(he has plenty of pics so ill be able to legally find out in a few min... but ill wait til i dont get a response for a week)
Ill probably make a script to strip out the auto-messages... replying with an auto ofc... and the mundane crap that shows they definitely didnt go beyond the pics.18 -
Fuuuuuuuck!!
CR estimates:
Part 1: 2h including testing
Part 2: 2h-2days-maybe never (small changes on horrifically fucked up project noone understands with tons of tech debt)
Managed to pull off the part two in one day.. //yay me?!
Additional day to unfuckup git fuckups (including but not limited to master head not compiling because a smartass included *.cs in .gitignore file which he also pushed..don't ask, I have no clue why..) which was a huuuge deal for me as I usually use only local repo and had no idea how to tackle this.. coworker helped out.. seems I was on the right way, but git push branchy was acting up & said I had to login & ofc I had no clue what the pass was set to (first setup was more than 2yrs ago)..so new key, new pass.. all good.. yay!
Back to the original story/rant: Now I'm stuck with writing jira explanation why it was done this way & not the way customer suggested. They offered only vague description anyways which would require me to do a hacky messy thing, ew.. + it most probably would require major data modifications after deployment to even make it work..
Anyhow, this expanation is also easy peasy in english..
BUT...
I must write it in my native tongue.. o.O FML! Spent almost 40mins on one paragraph..
Sooo.. if anyone will petition to ban non english in IT, I'm all for it!!2 -
Ha! Our Ops Support DBA Manager just asked (tongue in cheek) "if we are now supporting MS Access, too?" To which of course, the answer is no. Business user who install Access on their desktop and use it for business, get to provide their own support. As their Dev DBA, I'll be more than happy to help them migrate their data to SQL Server, Oracle, or Teradata, depending on the Use Case for the data. But, no, we don't support Access. Ever.
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When you tear out a man's tongue, you are not proving him a liar, you're only telling the world that you fear what he might say.4
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I don't think ranters here from first world countries (US/UK/Canada etc) realize what a big deal it is when companies from these countries hire South Asian companies (like India, Pakistan, Bangladesh) for their out-sourcing work.
I have seen some career building centers with people giving testimonials like "My mother tongue is Hindi and I was always afraid to talk to US/UK clients. But now that I took a course here, I can talk to them with confidence.".
People here throw themselves at these companies' feet begging for a contract. Gotta get that currency converted bag am I right?
I worked at a company and one day someone from London hired us for work and the boss threw a small party cuz "Someone from LONDON is hiring us omg".
Makes me wonder, this is why third world countries like us have such a good IT infrastructure.1 -
Whenever I had to pronounce Djikstra's Algorithm. My tongue be like - dijjuuksstrra... Fuck you I am commiting suicide between these teeth.8
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** few years ago **
Other team: "There's a lot of overlap and misclassification between issue categories A and B; We want to merge them into one in our taxonomy"
Me: These are very different issues and have very different root causes. Shouldn't we fix the definitions instead? We don’t have major drivers for B now but if we remove it, it might bite us in year or two.
** loads of back and forth, and eventually B gets killed
** year and a quarter passes
Executive meeting: “So you’re telling us we can’t properly quantify the impact of B because we can’t distinguish A from B. It looks very clear cut to me why don’t we have split for these already and how long will it take to implement it?”
Me: Biting my tongue not to throw anyone under a bus. -
floating point numbers are workarounds for infinite problems people didn’t find solution yet
if you eat a cake there is no cake, same if you grab a piece of cake, there is no 3/4 cake left there is something else yet to simplify the meaning of the world so we can communicate cause we’re all dumb fucks who can’t remember more than 20000 words we named different things as same things but in less amount, floating point numbers were a biggest step towards modern world we even don’t remember it
we use infinity everyday yet we don’t know infinite, we only partially know concept of null
you say piece of cake but piece is not measurement - piece is infinite subjective amount of something
everything that is subjective is infinite, like you say a sentence it have infinite number of meanings, you publish a photo or draw a paining there are infinite number of interpretations
you can say there is no cake but isn’t it ? you just said cake so your mind want to materialize something you already know and since you know the cake word there is a cake cause it’s infinite once created
if you think really hard and try to get that feeling, the taste of your last delicious cake you can almost feel it on your tongue cause you’re connected to every cake taste you ate
someone created cake and once people know what cake is it’s infinite in that collection, but what if no one created cake or everyone that remember how cake looks like died, everything what’s cake made of extinct ? does it exist or is it null ? that’s determinism and entropy problem we don’t understand, we don’t understand past and future cause we don’t understand infinity and null, we just replaced it with time
there is no time and you can have a couple of minutes break are best explanations of how null and infinite works in a concept of time
so if you want to change the world, find another thing that explains infinity and null and you will push our civilization forward, you don’t need to know any physics or math, you just need to observe the world and spot patterns10 -
I'm attracted to the idea of producing content related to full stack development and/or gamedev (not that of my strongest point but I like to do that too) but something I cannot decide on is which language to target, as I'm a native Spanish speaker.
The only reason I see to do content in English is that it would reflect good on my CV and/or any future business opportunities, also that in regards to tech videos is what I watch on a daily basis as content in my native tongue is poorly produced and/or dated.
the only set back is that I suck a bit speaking English and my grammar sucks a lot, and that can ruin it for me.
what should I do?8 -
God came into my body, as thd body of a horny demon. My same size. I see jesus in visions naked and he has his penus in hands and rubs and jesus points at me and starts licking me with his long tongue
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