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Dear self proclaimed wordpress 'developers/programmers', kindly go fuck yourself.
I'm not talking about wordpress devs/designers who don't claim to have a better skillset than they have and are actually willing to learn, those are very much fine.
I'm talking about those wordpress people who claim that they're developers, programmers or whatever kind of bullshit which they're obviously not.
"A client's site crashed, you have to fix it!!!!!" sorry, come again? It's YOUR client's site. It's hosted on our hosting platform meaning that WE are responsible for KEEPING THE SERVERS UP AND FUNCTIONING.
You call yourself a wordpress 'developer' with 'programming experience' for 10 years but the second one of your shitty sites crashes, you come to us because 'it's your responsibility!!!'.
No, it's not. Next to that fact, the fact that you have to ask US why the site is crashing while you could easily login to your control panel, go to the fucking error logs and see that one of your facebook plugins crashes with a quite English error message, shows me that you definitely don't have 10 years of programming experience. And if you can't find that fucking article which tells you exactly where the motherfucking error logs are, don't come crying to us asking to fix your own fucking bullshit.
"My clients site got hacked, you have to clean it up and get it online again ASAP!!!!" - Nah, sorry, not my responsibility. The fact that you explicitly put your wordpress installation on 'no automatic updates' also doesn't help with my urge to fucking end you right now.
Add to that that we have some quite clear articles on wordpress security which you appearantly found too difficult (really? basic shit like 'set a strong fucking password' is too difficult for you?), you're on your own.
"I'm getting an error, please explain what's going wrong as soon as you can! this is a prio 1!!!!" - Nope. You were a wordpress dev/programmer right? Please act like one.
I'm not your personal wordpress agent.
I'm not your personal hacked wordpress site cleanup guy.
I'm not even a fucking wordpress professional. No, I'd rather jump off a bridge than develop wordpress bullshit for a living.
That you chose to do this, not a problem. Just don't rely on me for fixing your shit.
I'm sick of cleaning up your bullshit.
I'm done with answering your high prio tickets about bullshit which any dev could find out with just a few minutes of searching.
Oh your wordpress site isn't showing up so high in google? Yeah sure, shoot a ticket at us blaming us for your own SEO mess. I'm a fucking sysadmin, not a SEO expert.
I'm fucking done with you.
Go die in a fucking corner.22
A friend of mine went to her boss and said that she will quit if she won't get 50% salary raise - boss said ok. She told about it her working colleague so he went to the boss and said 50% or I'll quit - boss said cleanup your desk...5
When your system is just slow and you want to do a disk cleanup
Result: hidden storage uncovered 😂. Invisible storage space. 😂😂☁️🌦🌥🌧
(Zoom in to see what I mean 😂😂)10
Just finished all the form function, time to clean up I guess.
Did you guys like to write it clean from start or do it later at the end?44
Just coded for ~14h straight. Started doing some super heavy code cleanup and refactoring. Almost cried when I saw my code from the past.
Maybe it's time to call it a day...4
Personal projects are the best.
Coming home after work.
Cooking diner and cleanup, dishwash stuff.
Giving some attention to partner.
Exercise, because you have been sitting all day.
And then the one hour that is left before you need to sleep. You fire up the project just to realize that you forgot what you have been doing. And start browsing devrant instead.
Great day. let's try again tomorrow.6
Client: This codebase is known to be ripe for refactor. We'll probably have you do that.
Me: *opens up codebase and notices inconsistent coding styles, bad design principles, and direct contradiction of accepted community standards for how to use that particular language*
Me: I suppose to start, do you guys have some coding standards I can look at to help cleanup the code in a way that is consistent with your other codebases?
Client: This one team was working on developing some, but they haven't touched it in a while. We don't really need them, though.
Me: Ok, then I'll do my best to make sure coding styles are consistent using my own knowledge. Why are you guys doing [thing that contradicts community language usage standard because it causes memory issues]?
Client: Well the docs talk about [similar x scenario], but don't mention [actual y scenario], so we decided to go our own way. It doesn't really matter, right?
Me: It can cause memory issues because you're largely bypassing some of the atomicity and garbage collection checks that come with the runtime by default. I'll change those to be safe.
Client: Why are you so concerned about these small things? We need to refactor the structure of the code! We don't have time for this!
Me (in my head): Because your codebase is unreadable and several of your issues could likely be fixed by following community guidelines.
Standards are important and should be agreed on by the Dev team using them. Community guidelines exist for a reason, even if they aren't 100% documented. These things may seem small, but they often make a world of difference when it comes to supporting your code and reducing technical debt. If you let your devs be cowboys, your code will be the Wild West.3
Background: I'm not drunk yet, BUT I'M WORKING ON IT.
I just finished a second sprint on my React app. The first was to build a merchant onboarding flow. The second was to do substantial cleanup as I learned more about react/redux, and to create a "supply order" flow -- basically purchasing marketing materials and services. I finished that in a week, and I'm pretty proud. api-guy wanted it done in a day. i laughed. he probably could have, but it would have been a copy of the code in a new repo with some lines changed.
ANYWAY. it's all done and It's super pretty and works amazingly well. It has both the onboarding flow and the ordering flow, with a nice pop-out sidebar for navigation, namespaced actions, etc. Everything is pretty clean. I even added a cart to the ordering (despite everyone telling me not to) because wtf, what if someone wants to order TWO items? dumbasses. So I made that. it's sexy.
Anyway, it's all done and shiny and fancy and wonderful and I'd *love* to share screenshots if only it didn't give away where I worked. :<
... but the point of the rant!
After the first sprint, I made a copy of the repo so I could rework it and add more functionality without touching the original. (Hey! That's what a branch is for, right? Why didn't I branch it up?
well, read on)
I knew we were going to have multiple separate flows for this app: onboard, ordering, merchant tools, admin tools, support, etc. So, I wrote its server portion (the webpack builder + http server) so it would serve the same app at whatever url the user hit, and set a cookie containing that host+url. This allows the app to serve different content (basically showing/hiding content) based on the URL and future login roles. If someone hits /order, it would hide everything but the order flow. If they're a merchant, it would show all the merchant views plus ordering, etc.
tl;dr This way I can use the same codebase for multiple sites, drastically simplifying development, branding, and what have you. This new app could obv also be a drop-in replacement for the original onboarding project because of the above.
HOWEVER. this apparently isn't good enough for api-guy. He's terrified that adding/updating future components will affect all the existing content somehow.
now we have three repos for basically the same codebase. 1) onboard aka "surfboard", 2) ordering, 3) merchant tools, aka "ferrari" (the "future" app).
1) "surfboard" is a very old version of the code. 3) "ferrari" is also old, since 2) "ordering" has newer content in it now.
... and somehow this is better?
fuck if i can figure out how.
His reasoning is "well, you won't be touching surfboard or ordering for 6 months, so now you don't have to worry about it." Sure, except, you know, it'll be a pain in the ass in 6 months now when I have a crapton of code and branding to redo. ffs.
Oh. We also have three Heroku pipelines for these three repos. for the same codebase.
and now you know why i'm drinking.7
Take a look at how big my SSD is(220GB).
Take a look at how much space I can remove with MS Disk Cleanup.
So there is a very very 👌 small risk that I will now erase the whole Windows Update File Server at Microsoft, lets see what's happens 🤞16
I recently got a job as a sysadmin and they've been debriefing me on their hacked websites (wordpress malware injection). Beats me why they still have their sites up at all...
BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE!
I wanted to see if they have any backups... NONE.
The latest snapshot was over a year ago...FML. Over a year ago when they barely have anything on their company site and client sites 😒
Now, I have to revive 10 websites from redirection. Time to do some shell scripting!4
Today I've been mocked by a fucking coffee machine.
So I was at a small train station, everything was already closed except for a small coffee machine
Dumb I, for whatever fucking reason, decided it'd be a great idea to get a highly overpriced cup there.
Now, the fucker made me the drink but instead of giving change, it started "shooting" coins in my direction (there was no flap on change box)
As I'm picking up my change, this abomination of a machine performs a cleanup, spitting some shit into my drink
I couldnt drink it obviously .. threw the overprices drink away, bought another one... Got shot with coins again... Whata pain... Just to figure out... There's no more cups 😭😭
It made the drink into the tray...
I really hate when I have to help a coworker and then when I need to use their keyboard. is dirty AF, really disgusting! like c'mon, how is that I need to tell them that their keyboard could use a bit of cleaning19
On Friday, in the midst of the craziest disaster cleanup possible for a project, I tell my boss my laptop keeps freezing and is probably going to crash. Saturday 8:30 FedEx rolls up with a new laptop. I'm even more scared now!4
Yesterday, my girlfriend caught a virus. There were 5+ running programs, in program files, program files x86, system32, basically everywhere. The virus modified chrome, firefox, edge (and even installed a false uc browser assuming we had one), there are many entries at startup programs, also running daemons, once you kill one of them, the others detect it and replicate their killed fellows. Tried to run a linux live usb disk for a cleanup, but the computer hibernates instead of shutdown, making modifications on disk risky.
I spent hours trying to suppress the processes, do a manual cleanup and antivirus search. It looked all cleaned up, then I reinstalled chrome, and now it switches its homepage everytime I open it, it also injects batch arguments to desktop link forum chrome (deleting it manually does not help, it comes back). I'm a linux guy, and in a few hours, I hated windows more than ever.
If anybody knows the authors, I *really* want to meet them. I promise I'm not going to punch them, but kneel down, bow my head in respect, and say "teach me master."14
Just now saw an email from Support after I asked them to run some cleanup commands on 4 servers.
Support: u need to give us an automated job for this.
WELL FUCK YOU, Y DON'T YOU JUST DO IT URSELF.
I JUST SPENT 2HRS INVESTIGATING A PROD ISSUE WHICH GOT ESCALATED CUZ UR A BUNCH OF USELESS INCOMPETENT MONKEYS... THE LEAST YOU CAN DO IS HELP... AND WHAT I HOPE WOULD BE YOU BUILD UR OWN TOOL... BEING SUPPORT UR SUPPOSED TO HELP ME REDUCE MY WORK NOT INCREASE IT1
Ever had the feeling "My code is working fine but I know it's so messy and I should make it readable for others!"
-Never done anything13
Update log: performance improve, API rewritten, fixed all bugs reported, new features implemented, general cleanup of code, documentation and comments update
Feedback: love the new background colour!
Code fuckup day or what?! After two weeks where I wasn't on my project and a co-worker handled it, I came back to my project and reviewed what he had done so far.
Me: "I don't understand how this new code part here can work?"
Him: "Uhm, actually, it doesn't, somehow."
Then he had checked in his stuff with spaces while the whole project is with tabs. And variables that were used in a different way, but still under the old name, now completely misleading. Bypassing existing infrastructure and defines with "just for this case" hacks. But the best was tracking higher level state by peeking into lower level data buffers, even pulling out their data definitions into global header files - instead of using proper states in the higher layer itself.
NOT! IN! MY! FUCKING! PROJECT!!!
So I spent the day cleaning up the shit to fight off software rot right in the beginning.4
Am I the only one who doesn't judge a programmers contributions by commits or change history?
Frequently I'm always near the bottom of contributors, because I don't make a million commits when it's broken. And I don't commit lines that will likely disappear in later commits. I like to finish a function, test it, check it, rework, and then make a "made function()" commit, as apposed to:
"Wrote unit tests for function()"
"Style guide compliance"
Sorry that I keep my commit history clean and ensure it builds.7
So I need to let off some steam, let me know if you think I need to calm down. Personally I'm just having a hard time understanding my team lead.
So I've been trying to update our codebase for the past two months so we run tests against the latest versions of each respective major browser. I've also been trying to cleanup our code and split it into logical modules.
Need I add, according to Bitbucket, I've written over 80% of our code on our 4 projects with 4 team members including myself.
He's out for a week, so I decide it's fine time to get some work done -- which is ridiculous in itself. I finish, add unit tests for crap I missed because he kept shutting down my PRs for shit he couldn't understand.
He tells me on Friday, when he got back, that he'll be declining my pull requests because my code is too complex -- my team lead -- thinks list comprehension and OOP in Python is too complex. Doesn't understand why we need to have pep8 lint tests, or why we can't just export one giant monolithic client package with over 3k lines of code.
Is it worth arguing or should I just let my department head know I can't work on this team anymore? He won't get talked to or fired, he's been at my company for 6 years and he's in the inner circle.6
Neighbouring nursing student asked me to recommend her a good laptop. I take a look at her existing one and it's an ultra book in pretty much decent condition. I ask her what her issue with this one is and turns out there's not enough space on the hard disk (30 GB SSD). I advice her to consider upgrading instead of buying a new laptop and she agrees. She also asks me if I can fix the track par of the laptop as it's not working. I take a look at the system tray and then work my computer science magic (press the fn+F9 to activate the trackpad) and boom! It's a miracle and she's squealing with delight. I even ran a disk cleanup and wiped 3Gigs of space so that she could continue downloading the episode from Netflix.
I hear a lot of you people complain about being asked to do outrageous tech shit because you're a computer person but man, I sure love being the "tech guy". :D28
I was checking out this wk139 rants & thinking to myself how does one have a dev enemy.. o.O Well TIL that maaaaybe I have one too..
Not sure if ex coworker was a bit 'weird & unskillful' or wanted to intentionally harm us and thank god failed miserably..
I decided to finally cleanup his workspace today: he had a bad habit of having almost all files in solution checked out to himself, most of them containing no changes whatsoever... I reminded him on many occasions that this is bad practice & to only have checked out files he was currently working on. And never checkin files without changes.. Ofc didn't listen.. managed to checkin over 100 files one time, most of which had no changes & some even had alerts for debugging in them.. which ofc made it to the client server.. :/
On one or two occasions I already logged in and wanted to check if files have any real changes that I'd actually want to keep, but gave up after 40 or so files in a batch that were either same or full of sh..
Anyhow today I decided I will discard everything, as the codebase changed a lot since he left an I know I already fixed a lot of his tasks.. I logged in, did the undo pending changes and then proceed to open source control explorer.
While I was cleaning up his workspace, I figured I could test what will happen if I request changeset xy and shelveset yy, will it be ok, or do I have to modify something else & merge code.. Figured using his workspace that was already set up for testing would be easier, faster & less 'stressful' than creating another one on my computer, change IIS settings and all just, to test this merge..
Boy was I wrong.. upon opening source control explorer, I was greeted by a lot of little red Xes staring back at me... more than half the folders on TFS were marked for deletion.. o.O
Now I'm not sure if he wanted to fuck me up when he left or was just 'stupid' when it comes to TFS. O.O
So...maybe I do have a dev enemy after all.. or I don't.. Can't decide.. all I know for sure is tomorrow I'm creating another workspace to test this and I'm not touching his computer ever again.. O.O
Christmas 🌲 party at work tonight. It's going to be boring since we are only 9 staffs.
Please give me a good reason so I can ditch this party? The best one I have so far is "I have shit in my pants. going home to cleanup and change. I will come back."11
Woooooo! Someone ran a cleanup script that deleted all the RPM package our dev Oracle databases use. Glad I'm not that person.
At my first internship I always had to cleanup the lunch area (after the lunch of course) and they would leave everything... One guy even left the crusts of his bread and so I had to cleanup everything. But the same guy one time left the crusts of an crusty bread roll... I mean what, how? WHY?? Who would do something like this?12
Little job story about dev server cleanup :-)
Ops 1: We are running out of disk space on <server ip>, only 14GB left
[one day later]
Chef: Guys can you take a look at the server, I see postgresql is taking 51GB
[a few minutes later]
Ops 2: otherwise we can truncate the whole database
*Dev 1, 2, 3, 4* D: !!!!!
Dev 1, 2, 3, 4: ok we are looking at it
[few seconds later]
Dev 2: I cleaned 13GB, more can be cleaned if we do a backup
Dev 3: I also cleaned a few gigs2
Put all Code into one Controller and the middlewares are a mess.
Who did it? Yeah, me.
But who fixed it? Also me.6
How is it that after restarting... and updating Windows I go from 10GB free (no idea how it got so low) to 39GB free... and apparently that doesn't include the 27GB that Windows.old takes up?
And why does it thinking deleting all files in Downloads is cleanup...6
I've just noticed something when reading the EU copyright reform. It actually all sounds pretty reasonable. Now, hear me out, I swear that this will make sense in the end.
Article 17p4 states the following:
If no authorisation [by rightholders] is granted, online content-sharing service providers shall be liable for unauthorised acts of communication to the public, including making available to the public, of copyright-protected works and other subject matter, unless the service providers demonstrate that they have:
(a) made best efforts to obtain an authorisation, and
(b) made, in accordance with high industry standards of professional diligence, best efforts to ensure the unavailability of specific works and other subject matter for which the rightholders have provided the service providers with the relevant and necessary information; and in any event
(c) acted expeditiously, upon receiving a sufficiently substantiated notice from the rightholders, to disable access to, or to remove from, their websites the
notified works or other subject matter, and made best efforts to prevent their future uploads in accordance with point (b).
Article 17p5 states the following:
In determining whether the service provider has complied with its obligations under paragraph 4, and in light of the principle of proportionality, the following elements, among others, shall be taken into account:
(a) the type, the audience and the size of the service and the type of works or other subject matter uploaded by the users of the service; and
(b) the availability of suitable and effective means and their cost for service providers.
That actually does leave a lot of room for interpretation, and not on the lawmakers' part.. rather, on the implementer's part. Say for example devRant, there's no way in hell that dfox and trogus are going to want to be tasked with upload filters. But they don't have to.
See, the law takes into account due diligence (i.e. they must give a damn), industry standards (so.. don't half-ass it), and cost considerations (so no need to spend a fortune on it). Additionally, asking for permission doesn't need to be much more than coming to an agreement with the rightsholder when they make a claim to their content. It's pretty common on YouTube mixes already, often in the description there's a disclaimer stating something like "I don't own this content. If you want part of it to be removed, get in touch at $email." Which actually seems to work really well.
So say for example, I've had this issue with someone here on devRant who copypasted a work of mine into the cancer pit called joke/meme. I mentioned it to dfox, didn't get removed. So what this law essentially states is that when I made a notice of "this here is my content, I'd like you to remove this", they're obligated to remove it. And due diligence to keep it unavailable.. maybe make a hash of it or whatever to compare against.
It also mentions that there needs to be a source to compare against, which invalidates e.g. GitHub's iBoot argument (there's no source to compare against!). If there's no source to compare against, there's no issue. That includes my work as freebooted by that devRant user. I can't prove my ownership due to me removing the original I posted on Facebook as part of a yearly cleanup.
But yeah.. content providers are responsible as they should be, it's been a huge issue on the likes of Facebook, and really needs to be fixed. Is this a doomsday scenario? After reading the law paper, honestly I don't think it is.
Have a read, I highly recommend it.
Boss tells me to cleanup prod drives deleting anything older than a year.
So I find a script for that and run it after making sure works.
Told them it's done and freed up 20% but now they've gone silent.... 🤔🤔🤔🤔😥😥😥😥😥😟😟😟😟😟😟😟😟4
Nothing more depressing than a response like "No, no, no, we can't remove this old code. It doesn't matter that there's 0 references as of 3 years ago"3
"It's very unfortunate that someone has to sit 10 hours a day on a computer screen but that's what we are paying for."
Working with an EU client.
Task is in stages beginning from assessment of an 9 year old Salesforce instance, cleanup and then transition to lightning.
The deliverabale in the first stage is excel sheet - objects(2400+), fields, apps, packages, profiles(110k), users, perm sets, apex classes, triggers, pages, s-controls and insert each and everything that a Salesforce instance could have.
Each and every data needs to be, analyzed and documented with our recommendations before being sent over. (Finding duplicates in 110k profiles??)
Oh, did I tell you, this was to be done four weeks? Weekend goes to hell.
That's when this beautiful motivational line comes up from the bridge, "It's very unfortunate that someone has to sit 10 hours a day on a computer screen but that's what we are paying for."
Fortunately(un?), that part of project is done and over with.
Now comes the clean up, identify packages not being used, remove them, qa and then push for deployment.
Mind you, this project is to be 2 weeks long. Its Friday of the first week today. And I am still working weekends.
Can I say, FML?7
I recently realized that I've been using 2 text editors and 1 IDE pretty much at the same time for different purposes.
Atom -> Code Beautification (atom-beautify is simply the best)
VSCode -> for actual coding (blazing fast and quite good completions)
Webstorm -> cleanup the code, optimize imports
And that made me thing why is it so hard to have all these things in one application (be it a core feature or a plugin/extension). And then I realized smth, only webstorm more has all the features built in, but I don't need/want full IDE for web development (Angular / React) alas it has great features like component automatic imports etc, but not a deal breaker.
So I am having a dilllema. On one hand, Atom has everything I need (especially atom-beautify, my OCD is at peace) except for proper completions (partially solved with extensions) and terminal integrations. On the other hand, VSCode is very fast, has good code assistance but half-broken import completions and terrible code beautification even with extensions such as jsbeautify that require you to have a separate file for each project instead of it being an editor setting/plugin like in Atom.
/* insert joke here */ When will Atom and VSCode go super Saiyan mode and become "Atomized Visual Code" :P I wanna stop bunny hopping between editors!2
Why is it so hard for people (especially managers) to learn to work smarter not harder....
FIX THE GODDAMN PROBLEM CORRECTLY... THE FIRST TIME SO WE DON'T HAVE TO KEEP FIXING ITS BLOWUPS ON WEEKENDS....
AND STOP HIRING MONKEYS THAT JUST KNOW TO PRESS BUTTONS RATHER THAN DESIGNING FULLY FUNCTIONAL SOLUTIONS THAT DON'T BLOW UP OR LEAVE A TRAIL OF SHIT BEHIND THAT I NEED TO DECIPHER N CLEANUP....2
Webmin because why not ✓
Lamp stack ✓
Dynamic DNS client ✓
Dear DigitalOcean. SINCE WHEN do you consider a PMA installation
without Https SECURE?
And why the fuck do you make me install an aptitude package that skips both file system AND Apache config cleanup on purging?
It's just a raspberry, but if it runs lamp I want PMA, and if it runs anything, I want Https. Is that too much to ask for from a tutorial source otherwise so reliable that I do anything you say without a questioning thought?8
It's my yearly cleanup day, when I fully nuke down my windows installation, to clean out all the installed trash and residue.
Have moved all important data and I will be ready to fully refresh my computer as soon as it syncs, heres the question though.
I decided this time I'll create a dev vm, so I can just each time reset to point 0 and also because I miss having local development.
What new linux distros or flavours are out there that would be worth looking at? (I saw things like ubuntu budgie being mentioned)
If you use it and it doesnt break if I sneeze, mention it, I am open to getting to know other environments, even if its not my usual debian homeplace.5
Started new course called "Introduction to natural language processing" in uni. I am super bad at doing regular expressions and don't understand anything about them.
Saw the first weeks homework. Have to do i.e. some text cleanup with regex... I was sad. But now after reading the course material and trying some of the exercises I'm super excited since I'm actually doing something "real" with it.
Do you guys just love it when teaching material is well written? I do.3
Production broke today because Google code removed a project that was hotlinked, but cleanup is not a priority #fml2
I just spent my day analyzing module interdependencies in our project. Amfter comming up with a way to graph said dependencies using an analisys tool and some custom filtering, and comming up with suggestions for breaking unwanted dependencies, i get this as a review comment: " yeah, I don't reaaly trust that the graphs are showing the whole picture. Use <gradle dependencies> on each service instead". The lunatic actually expected me to sift through all of our services, by hand, and run that command and analyse the result, wich is a great wall of text.
Joke's on him though. I wrote a script that did all of that for me and captured the results. Then i just sent it to him. If he's so unsure, then he can sift through the wall of text himself.
Even funnier is the fact that tomorrow is the last day before i go on leave. He'll probably end up doing the actual cleanup himself. 😂
I don't want to seem stuck up but, at the moment, there are several other priorities higher than this refactor, yet management is insisting that this is a must have for go live, so I have to commit.
What would you rather have, an app that works, or perfectly neat and tidy, broken, code?6
I remember when doing some privacy cleanup, looking at the third-party list of a website and visiting the sites behind them. I ended up one time on Crazy Egg.
3 months later, I got an email if I wouldn't want to use their services.
They did have my email.
From where? (the answer is obviously from the sites they track)
But I mean, who cares about your email when they have your f****** passport
This world is getting to crazy, I thought this would be the maximum. Of course...
I think tracking is a more serious problem, than I imagined (and I do already try to reduce data)
Oh yeah and btw I just noticed an iOS app could silently use my mobile data (was deactivated for the app) to display ads. Silently. I hope this was a bug. But I don't think so.
Agencies... Just hate when people are given only time enough for doig crap code, because "there is no budget". Hate even more to work on changes on top of it, because people just dont get why you take so long to do changes that supposed to be simple, ignoring the fact that previously they asked for some slap-dash shit. What do they think, that with time the code cleanup and tidy up itself?
Oookayy, to continue from my previous rant, I kinda feel like living inside a slapstick comedy for the last 2 days, not the good ones at that, the ones that left you with vexation, so to summarise I'll just put the amusing conversations from the "team" for the last 2 days
On a side note, the team consist of 16 people divided into 2 squads, I'm still moving back and forth between the 2, and most of the time I just keep my silence,
*roll the intro,
- PO = product owner
- SM = scrum master
- D = dev
#1, "sloth, procrastination and ignorance"
*a dev came by to ask for some question
D: uhh, can you help me with this?
Me: sure what is it?
D: I want to be able to do this, so that it can be like bla blah blah
Me: ok, let me see, maybe you can do like (give a crude example on my laptop), there, let's try it, aand, it seems to be working, there you go, something like that
D: ahh I see, ok,
Me: well, ok
D: can't you commit the change and push it?
*seriously? It's just a crude example for you to follow, not a final answer
Me: uhh, it needs some cleanup, but you do get how it goes right?
D: I do but... the code is there so I don't see why we shouldn't use it
*because you need to fucking learn how to write it yourself
Me: and like I said, the logic could be better, here, you can peek and retype it (sheesh, like teaching a middle schooler)
#2, "Don't you have anything better to do?"
*in a morning "meeting"
SM: okay, good morning everyone (it's 10 AM), there is something I would like to discuss, first is our attendance, based on the company policy, our attendance should be 8-5, and I see some still arrive at 9 and some at 10, So I want to propose that we all committed to come earlier, say, like at 8:30
SM: because there are instances when someone needed something, some people are unavailable,
*fucking illogical, it's your lengthy meeting that needs to be fixed, this one later goes on for 2 hours just to discuss about attendance time
*insert intense discussion for an hour
SM: so we agreed for everyone to arrive at 9, and to enforce everyone to be more committed, I want to put a penalty in place
D,PO: what kind of penalty?
SM: we already have a pool for our "snack money" right, let's put the penalty there, and the amount cannot be just any amount, it should be an amount that leaves an impression, otherwise if it's just a measly sum, some guys would prefer to pay the penalties and coming late
D,PO: well, how much is it?
SM: let's say it's enough to cost you 2 days worth of food, we'll discuss the exact amount later, but it's something around that
D,PO: whoa" wait, seriously?
SM: yes, seriously
*everyone went into chaos for the next 1 hour, and in the end the penalty thing is postponed for the future
*but more importantly, for fuck's sake, 2 hours for a meaningless conversation? And there's nothing gained on top of all that? If this is the way you guys work, I'm starting to question your capability as a human being
#3 "Otsukare sama, but not to you, yes you, fuck you"
*much later at the beginning of sprint retro
PO: okay, first up I wanna appreciate all your hard work, word from the management is that they didn't expect for us to be able to finish our features so fast, for that I would like to give my appreciation to you all
PO: I want to say thanks to dev#1, dev#2, for making it possible, all the tester, ehh, but you (referring to me), you haven't done anything yet, so yours will come later
*what the fuck is that supposed to mean? I just nod and smiled
SM: ah, also one thing, the testers asks for a front end dev for our squad so here he is (referring to me), we finally have an FE dev, and a senior one at that (I have no idea, and never referred to myself as senior), and you, because you are considered as a senior, naturaly we've set a high expectation for you
Me: (smiled) eeh, I'll do my best (to get out of this ASAP)
*it's just been 4 days and you guys already prepared to shift the blame to me, neat,
#4, "The thing that was never discussed"
*in the middle of sprint retro
All: blah blah (talking about future sprint plan)
*fuck is this? retro or sprint planning?
D: uhh, I wanna ask something
SM: ok shoot,
D: next sprint we're gonna do feature X right? Looking back at what we did with feature Y, can we...
SM: we cannot talk about Y, we are currently discussing about X
SM: as I said, no talking about unrelated stuff, our discussion must not stray, we are discussing X
D: o..kay? Let's say, that we implement the same method as the one in...
SM: which feature are you referring to?
D: implementation of Y
SM: why are you still talking about Y? We are discussing about X, we must not stray from our current discussion got it?
D: umm, okay?
SM: good, let's continue with our matter, bla bla (ignoring previous discussion)
*what the fuck?
*roll end credits
*changes connection to metered
*kill tasks/cleanup downloaded files
*stops updation in every possible way
*select never check for updates(not recommended)
*logout then login continuosly
**windows still updating6
I cleaned up my desk and decluttered everything to freshen things up.
It's much nicer to have a clean desk especially when a desk is the only 'office' in your business.
It's not perfect, but it's much better than before :)
PS: I wouldn't dare to share the mess it was and burn it through your eyes... It'd be a sin.6
So the guy I replaced as the senior dev on my project (because he was lazy) is now trying to give me advice on how to cleanup my code.... This is the motherfucker who blatantly copies and pastes from one library to another and pushes the code without doing ANY testing and so I had to spend many weekends cleaning up his pile of shit code, and now I have 3 new tickets labelled 'style updates' that he wants me to merge in.... Fuck him, I'm not merging his code4
Autoformat. My boss hates it when I use it, he tells me if I do it again I'll get some pain. Namely because autoformat mixed in with code changes is ugly, that's understandable. But he's barred me from using it entirely, although I find it useful when working in Python or CSS... So to circumvent this I make a separate commit with "cleanup", however I sometimes forget to do this... I know I've forgotten, because my boss calls my name from the room next door. I get up, step inside his office and - "Don't use f****** autoformat!". Well FML.8
Questions/best practises for git?
- use present tense in commit messages. (why though?)
A friend of mine also starts his commit messages with either [Task] or [Cleanup]. Useful for finding Commits in Gitlab etc, because only the first line is shown from the message.
Also, one teacher recommended the usage of branches and the other didn't because of alot of potential merge conflicts when working in a Team or a larger Collaboration. What are your thoughts?
Sorry for the messy post, have a hangover5
Installed JDK 8 patch 111 in preparation for an upgrade to our application servers . The app installer requires patch 45 or above. Come to find out the app installer can only deal with a 2 digit patch number. Uninstalled JDK 8 patch 111 to install patch 92 only to find that patch 92 installer won't work because patch 111 has messed with the registry and didn't do a thorough cleanup during the uninstall.1
OK what the actual fuck is going on within this company.
TL;DR: Spaghetti Copy/Pasted code that made me mad because it's just a mess
I just looked into a code file to search for a specific procedure regarding the creation of invoices.
I thought "Oh this is gonna be a quick look-through of like 1000 lines MAX" turns out this script is 11317 fucking lines long and most of it's logic is written there multiple (up to 6-7 times). And I'm not talking about a simple 10 lines or something. No! Logic of over 300 lines.. copy & pasted over .. and over .. and over?! I mean what the fuck did this guy drink when he wrote this.
Alsooo 10000 of those 11317 lines is ONE FUNCTION.. I kid you not! It's just a gigantic if / else if construct that, as I said before, contains copy-pasted code all over the place.
Sadly my TL thinks that code cleanup / optimization is "not necessary as long as it works" like wtf dude. If anyone wants to ever fix something in this mess or add a new feature they take a few hours longer just to "adjust" to this fucking shit.
This is a nightmare. The worst part: This is not the only script that has shit like this. We got over 150 "modules" (Yeah, we ATTEMPTED something OOP-ish but failed miserably) that sometimes have over 15000 lines which could be easily cut down to 1/3 and/or splitted into multiple files.
Let's not start about centralization of methods or encoding handling or coding standards or work code review or .. you get the point because there's a character limit for one rant and I guess I'd overshoot that by a lot if I'd start with that. Holy shit I can't wait until my internship is over and I can leave this code-hell!!2
Currently installing & updating w10 on a eeePC R101 with 2GB of ram.... disk cleanup is slooooooow...6
Just ran disk cleanup. Windows update cache = 3.2 GB.
How the fuck can an OS updater have 3 fucking GB's of cache. God dammit do they put shit in just to mess with my already slow connection?3
Host: The 'sessions' folder is too full, we moved the website in a quarantine server.
Me: Well, someone forgot to cleanup sessions when they're done.
Boss: Just delete the folder contents every 3 days!
I think I just came up with my next app idea while writing a blog post:
--Sometimes Ignorance Can Really Be Bliss?--
I like to be in know so I read a lot. My reading list will never end as there’s always more I can know.
Part of the problem is lack of clear priorities but all these articles and books are just so interesting….
I probably spend 4-5 hours every weekend reading… mostly from my Inbox. Yes I try to clear some daily but again, I keep a lot just because they look interesting.
I also use Boxbe and recently setup some Automatic Cleanup… but sort of hurts when I see an email I want to read but then it’s gone tomorrow…
**An App Idea!**
What if I never see these actual emails. But my computer does?
What if I can use it to generate a list of articles from all my emails and just show a few in a Weekly Digest?
Thoughts? anyone else have this problem?
But the key is still, never actually knowing what you missed!8
Great my team just got dumped with all the other teams messes and incomplete work! Great sprint planning guys.
I am acting as a code janitor
Cleaning other people's shitty code
Finished working on my module and there is avalanche of existing shit down the mountain which i have to cleanup because somehow it was fine before with all flies over it.
Finally got some time today to cleanup my inbox after three weeks of almost non-stop emergency. Came home from work, sat down in front of my computer and got a call from unknown number. Answered it and it was my ISP telling me that I have virus in my network and was spamming everybody and they cut off my internet. I know they are pretty useless and only kinda semi-IT literate. Took me an hour to convince them restore my connection with blocked port 25. Suricata log of all my traffic shows that nothing in my network communicated to port 25, the only possibilities are managed switch in front of my router I didn't managed to get into yet which should have managing interface on completely different VLAN and their router. Or mess in their system. My guess is their system is a mess. Will see how it works out tommorrow.
If I need 2 weeks to implement a new feature, I need at least one more week to find better solutions which make the code easier to read. Then I would like to spend yet another week to think about other solutions to make sure I can't find one that is even better..
I hardly ever get that time but when I do, I create something beautiful..
The last time I was able to reduce > 2000 lines of code to a about 50 lines generic service which is easily extendable and understandable.
Do you include stuff like this in your estimations?1
Coordinate with hosting to create a backup and a snapshot for a week prior to crazy intrusive data cleanup we will be doing this weekend.
Saturday comes, here I sit waiting for confirmation of the backup for two hours now.... Dicks.
I made a point to the management that people are unnecessarily reworking things and throwing away. And all products should have a product owner and they should give requirements. So the management called the same guy(who fucking does pointless rewrites in the name of code cleanup) and said come up with a solution. The guy came with a solution of Agile + Jira and a whole fucking process behind it. So guess what, we are having pointless meetings when we can just finish and ship deliverables.
The management successfully founded an efficient way to effectively waste time. Kuddos.4
Business managers not taking ownership for quality of data. If systems are not designed with proper data validation controls at each upstream data entry point them downstream processes and revenue will suffer. You will have a continuous data cleanup black hole.2
Just some free knowledge that I'd like to pass around:
I wanted to free up some space in my MacBook. I checked out different methods.
Here are some methods that helped:
- Go to ~/Library/Caches and try to clean shit up.
- If you have Homebrew, (if you don't, just quit dev already) run `brew cleanup` -- only for people with Macs.
- There's this app called Omnidisksweeper. Check that out.
- Also, indexing Spotlight is something I've heard of but never tried.7
#1 clean up the internet of domains, use those beautiful and fancy TLDs - blog, photography, gallery, cloud, house, gov, xxx
#2 more fanatical - clean the internet of cat / dog / [supposedly cute animal] pictures, and later - npm packages1
My most shameless hacks mostly include cronjobs that run every 5 minutes to cleanup or fix some faulty stuff...
I wrote a few related libraries for our app that literally every single one of the several hundred requests a second we receive goes through, and everytime there is a bug I always blame those libraries first... even though they are excellently unit and integration tested. Today i started the third "re-write" to cleanup the code and get some piece of mind. Will be pissed / relieved when the bug is somewhere else.
Feels good to be able to clean up code! Just changed an ugly 5-line while loop into a clean 2-line do-while. Now I just need the rest of my program to work 😂
Hmm... A big text on a UI.Card (on Pebble) crashes the watchapp.
I could design a string length handler and its own text display function...
Or I could divide the text into smaller chunks and call it a day.
Here we go,"4.5"! "4.5+"! "4.5++"!
And now I could look into why it crashes when pressing the back button on a semi long text...
Or I could think of it as an automated memory cleanup! Yeah, right! Awesome! Plus, it's only two press to go back where I was!
2 weeks into my industrial placement year during University I was tasked with writing a rhel .rpm file to install our software.
Within this script contained rm -rf ... you can see where this is going, right?
Well this command was meant to delete a local usr/bin folder during the cleanup, and it did! But I must have accidentally changed something, and instead of staying local, it bounced to /. Goodbye usr/bin. Goodbye 2 weeks worth of progress. Hello angry infrastructure team...1
Just spend two fucking days debugging a few methods in our program. I used unit tests to call those methods (don't want to navigate through the complete program workflow)...
Yeah, guess what: the test cleanup includes a fucking rollback transaction function. So NONE NADA ZERO FUCKING CHANGES WILL BE PERSISTED. Fuck me3
When people use comments for build configuration. And don't put down handy comments like "uncomment this if you want to do that".
I guess what I'm saying is that this "code cleanup" task is turning into a "code keep the bloated baseline" task.3
Mondays are for branch cleanup! It's gotten a *little* out of hand...anyone else this unorganized from time to time?1
I had to do a modular deduplication project that could read, parse and clean up the data.
The data? Personal information: Name, Surname, phone, address and more.
Imagine the zip code in any of the following formats: ####AA, #### AA. Names with and without dashes. Address with(out) spaces, dashes, underscores etc. as well as typos! Now clean it up, and dedup.
But what files have priority over another? What data is newer? How to process address changes?
Deadline: 2 moths, impossible deadline for a (at the time - 4 years ago - rookie developer)
Anyway, night before the deadline, code was running somewhat (Java) and was able to get a Regexed address cleanup of about 70 - 80%.
My boss comes in to check the progress, sits me down next to him and says: Not good enough, let's do it together tonight, it was 4pm, day normally ends at 5pm.
No thank you, I can't do that. if you don't want this code, then I can't meet your deadline.
I love documentation and git stashes.
Old project haven't touched for months, now need to pick it been up again...
Well I left Mueller a nice doc that has all the rationale and project setup structure.
Also detailed notes about how to run certain things and what needs to be done.... Although lots of files
.. Didn't really cleanup before switching focus...
But better then nothing!!!1
Microsoft makes the Disk Cleanup tool an optional install for Servers as part of "Desktop Experience" but crams that gawd-awful MetroUI at you by default... 😒 😡2