Watching normal people use a computer is incredibly painful.
* slow typing
* slow mouse movements
* mouse is used for everything
* instead of hitting the back button, they'll load up a website and go through 6 pages again.
* no shortcuts!

Someone lost their tabs today (Windows crashed), so I said "press ctrl + shift + T". They were so amazed that keys could do something so advanced.
Dhcosncowhtoehwurt hrnxkxxhry he.

Honestly, if people learned how to use keyboards to their full potential, they could shave off 1-2 hours of their normal work PER DAY!

"Oh, he is asking that much money for this website? I will create that for only $250 with WordPress. He is just trying to use you"

You fucking wanker. What you don't understand is that you are pushing the companies to a fucking black hole that they won't be able to recover from.

He shows an example of a website which takes 30 sec to load. It's full of hundreds of dreadful plugins. He chose the shittiest stock pictures to make it look "pretty".

When I point out his fucking shite website takes this long to load, he says if the company wants to make the website fast, they will need buy the premium plan of CloudFlare. WHAT THE FUCK are you even talking about?

Not only that, the example website, doesn't even have any SSL. He is saying that the other company didn't want to pay for the SSL. Ever heard of fucking StartSSL or LetsEncrypt?

It's people like you who is responsible for making half of the web an insecure, slow, low-performance space which is prone to hacking.

WordPress was made for blogging. KEEP IT THAT WAY. Stop trying to make your high-performance CMS or eCommerce website with this shite.

CAN WE JUST MAKE IT ILLEGAL TO LET YOUR ENTIRE PAGE JUMP AROUND BECAUSE THE ADS ARE SO SLOW TO LOAD?

FFS!

Lamer rant

For a really long time I said to myself that this is too basic to rant about but lately it became so frequent and extreme that here is my rant about completely clueless users that ask me IT related questions.

Disclaimer: Said users are people that I generally can't avoid. Distant family members, neighbors and etc.

Case 0:
U: I don't know what's happening!! The computer doesn't work!!
M: What do you mean?
U: There's no Facebook! And everything is stuck and no messenger!!!
M: The WiFi on your laptop was off. I turned it on. Still, this doesn't mean that the pc wasn't working.
U: I don't understand this shit!!!

Case 1:
U: I hate this computer!!! It never works!!! Help meeee!!!
M: What now?
U: Where did the internet disappear?!
M: (assuming it's wifi or browser related)
Actually user moved the Chrome window to bottom-right corner and lost it.

Every time I try to show the user how I resolve the issue the user yells that there are too many steps, that they are complicated and that I'm a bad teacher and doing it too fast.

Case 2:
U: My computer is so slow! It barely can load google translate! And I can't listen to music on youtube!! Shitty laptop! It's you! Your computers in the apartment drain everything!!!
M: You have no idea what you are talking about.
U: My husband told me that your computers are heavy and drain everything!
M: What exactly did he tell you that my devices drain?
U: I don't know! All the energy! I believe him! He knows!
M: My computers drain less electricity than your vacuum and I have a separate internet connection. Not only we share nothing but also I drain nothing.
U: Since you appeared all the computers are slow!!!!

Fkk...

Case 3:
U: I don't understand, where is my whatsapp?
M: You can't locate the app on your phone?
U: Yes! F*ck, help me! I'm so angry and I really need this NOW!!!
M: Shut up. I'm already here and helping.
(I open users phone and whatsapp is the active app...)
U: I can' t find my whatsapp with Clara!

F*ck you! F*ck you! Ghckjfshij!!!

Case 4:
(crazy hitting on my door)
U: I don't have THE internet!!!
It's you again! You took all of THE internet!!!
M: No, it doesn't work like that. Your provider is bad, your package is cheap and your cables are of low quality.
U: I need THE internet immediately!!! Stop playing with your typing and fix the facebook or I'll cut the power cables to the house!!

I can go on, just don't think that recalling all those events is healthy for me.

Client: We're gonna be hosting our site on [Overly popular shit host] via a shared hosting account.

Me: Well the performance isn't going to be stellar with WordPress on there, but if that's what you want, sure. I'll enable all the cache rules possible and make sure PHP 7 is running it, but there won't be any further optimizations I can do to make it faster with such limited hosting access.

[Next day after launching the website...]

Client: The website is super slow. I thought you were going to optimize it?

Me: That is the loading time with the optimizations I said I can apply. That host isn't great for performance unfortunately.

Client: Well you're going to need to find us a reputable host as a replacement, set up the account and move the website there so we aren't waiting forever for a page to load.

Me (in a reply via email):

Manager: The site I loading too slow. How can we improve this?

Me: *f5 & look at the network log* the server is taking too long to respond some image requests. We could encode them into the Html to have them all delivered in a single request.

Manager: GTMetrix says we need to compress the images.

Me: *reads GTMetrix report* we would only have a 150kb improvement. It won't even be noticeable.

Manager: If the images take a long time to load, it means that they're too big, right?

Me: or the server is taking a long time to respond our request for them, which is the case.

Manager: compress the images and upload them.

Me: *compresses the images and uploads them* done.

Manager: I don't see any improvement.

Me: if only there was someone who could have predicted such an outcome...

So you build a beautiful site; you spend good time on UX, refactoring, server optimisation, getting good page load speeds, SQL all optimised - life is good.
Commercial team comes in and slaps clickbait, generic advertising, tracking scrips over the lot.
Page loads go from a second to 30 seconds and even though you made sure all those crappy ad scripts are asynchronous pages still hang most times. PingdomTools lists your page scripts as going from 40 files to over 900... now users are ringing me up giving me grief about how slow this new company website is...

About two years ago I get roped into a something when someone was requesting an $8000 laptop to run an "program" that they wrote in Excel to pull data from our mainframe.

In reality they are using our normal application that interacts with the mainframe and screen scrapping it to populate several Excel spreadsheets.

So this guy kept saying that he needed the expensive laptop because he needed the extra RAM and processing power for his application. At the time we only supported 32 bit Windows 7 so even though I told him ten times that the OS wouldn't recognize more than 3.5 GB of RAM he kept saying that increasing the RAM would fix his problem. I also explained that even if we installed the 64 bit OS we didn't have approval for the 64 bit applications.

So we looked at the code and we found that rather than reusing the same workbook he was opening a new instance of a workbook during each iteration of his loop and then not closing or disposing of them. So he was running out of memory due to never disposing of anything.

Even better than all of that, he wanted a faster processor to speed up the processing, but he had about 5 seconds of thread sleeps in each loop so that the place he was screen scrapping from would have time to load. So it wouldn't matter how fast the processor was, in the end there were sleeps and waits in there hard coded to slow down the app. And the guy didn't understand that a faster processor wouldn't have made a difference.

The worst thing is a "dev" that thinks they know what they are doing but they don't have a clue.

FUCKING HELL
My sister has that Vaio laptop from 2012 and she wanted me to "clean it up"... You get the deal. I ran the bios and booted it up from my external SSD setup so I don't have to bother with her bloody Windows fucking 7. When I'm finished deleting some garbage she managed to accumulate on her disk I wanted to switch back to Windows to properly uninstall bloatware she had. AND THEN OT FUCKING STRUCK ME. Can't load bios. F keys don't do shit. Delete doesn't either. The bloody "ASSIST" button is as useless as always. Since the computer is so slow I'm gonna waste a whole day trying to fix it and in the end she will be like: "oh, it took you so long!". Why Vaio, why can't you just get over the fact that some people actually use BIOS and make it somehow ACCESSIBLE? It's the same shit every time I try to do anything with that laptop. I'm always getting shit on from Sony as if I paid them to fuck me. One last time. VAIO, FUCK YOU.

Manager: Absolutely everything must be done with libraries, vanilla JS solutions are absolutely prohibited!

Manager: Why is our app so slow to load? Is there a library we can install to speed the loading up?

Do you know what annoys the living fuck out of me?
Me: no...?
Me: may I tell?
Me: yes, please do!
Me: okay here we go:

Sites which use Google fonts or apis or ajax or other Google-hosted libraries.

It takes fucking ages to load those sites (if they lost et-all) since I block as much as possible from that cocksucking mass surveillance network.

Google, feel free to die in a fucking corner while getting an acid shower and being stripped of your skin layer by layer, as slow as possible to increase the pain and suffering.

Government Fucking Websites.

Slow as fuck, disorganized, errors from 2004, UI from 2001.

You have to use them at a time when you really don't feel like waiting 30 fucking seconds for each page load.

Or filling out a fucking form that, ok, they made SOME kind of attempt to save your data, but it's overly complex and annoying.

Government websites. Making tasks that should take 5 minutes, 5 hours, since 1998.

Assholes.

I'm afraid that the wanketeers got a hold of this one.. as if I care how fast or slow your browser is, as long as it isn't completely shit like pre-Quantum Firefox used to be! And does it even make the slightest bit of sense when there's nice and snappy websites like the motherfucking websites, but a shitload of shitsites that load several dozens of frameworks, because long live Web 2.0. 22% faster, ON WHAT?!

Started my new internship for the summer.

"Hey, our client's prestashop is getting really slow, could you please do something about it ?"
I go poke around to see what i can do, and after some research i see the problem. The search bar was taking 20-60s to load what was sometimes 16 objects.

The client was using a prestashop with the default search engine. 175000 products were registered. NO WONDER IT'S FUCKIN SLOW.

So on my first day of internship i entirely re-coded prestashop's product search function. I feel like this is not internship level stuff.

Tech support for Friend...
Again...

Ok...
A friend ran down the hallway to my Appartement, I opened the door for him and asked him "What The Fuck... Is wrong with you?!" He was just coughing like...
My... Laptop.... Is... Slow...
When he then eventually came to the point where he could Breath normally again I asked him to login into his by then super with shitty software bloated PC... It was a mess... A Desktop full of Shit... only Shit... I
then opened Chrome and Task Manager...
and holy shit... EVERYTHING! Literally ANYTHING was under 100% Load... Yet his shitty Fans werent spinning up... Shutdown the Laptop and opened it... not to my surprise it was full of Dust... I cleaned it and booted it again... still 100% Load... I couldnt do shit without being bombarded with porn and Hentai Ads... So... I asked him "Did you make any backups to this machine?" He was like.. "*Really long explenation* No *Really long Explenation*"
Great... i thought to myself... Then I said to him his PC was so trash that i only could Reset it to 0... He was like DO ANYTHING YOU CAN LITERALLY ANYTHING!
I then explained him, Resetting this PC Means literally 0 A Fresh start, nothing of your data will be there literally nothing...
He again Was like DO IT!
So I did... When it was done i showed him the result... He FREAKED OUT LIKE THE WORLD WAS GOING TO FUCKING END, HE SCREAMED AT ME WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU DONE? REVERSE IT! REVERSE IT NOW!
I Then said to him, I reset it to 0, I said this would happen...
He then took his now perfectly running Laptop and Ran away...

tl;dr
Tech support for friend, Reset PC to 0, Freaked out AF...

This was WAY back in my first job as a programmer where I was working on a custom built CMS that we took over from another dev shop. So a standard feature was of course pagination for a section that had well over 400,000 records. The client would always complain about this section always being very slow to load. My boss at that job would tell me to not look at the problem as it wasn't a part of the scope.

But being a young enthusiastic programmer, I decided to delve into the problem anyway. What I came to discover was that the pagination was simply doing a select all 400,000 records, and then looping through the entire dataset until it got to the slice it needed to display.

So I fixed the pagination and page loads went from around 1 min to only a few seconds. I felt pretty proud about that. But I later got told off by my boss as he now can't bill for that fix. Personally I didn't care since I learned a bit about SQL pagination, and just how terrible some developers can be.

Microsoft be like :
"Oh, you're moving away from your computer for a while with all this stuff open? It would a shame if some were to.. UPDATE it!"

It asks with a pop up, and if you don't answer it, it thinks "Oh, you're not telling me if I should update now or not, but I think you probably want me to update. UPDATE!"

For me, if I keep ignoring the update, it starts to create problems for me out of nowhere. It starts to lag and then the task manager starts to lag. EVERYTHING IS NOT RESPONDING.
When I finally update it, it acts like there were no issues at all. Everything is fine..

Even with Xbox, if it wants to update, it doesn't let you go online until you do. If it loses connection mid-update for some reason, it begins the update again from the friggin START. All that time updating gone to waste. Recently, I'm having a lot of issues with it. It doesn't let me sign in a lot of times. "We couldn't sign you in" for some reason. It JUST CAN'T. If you have a slow internet connection, you can't play any game at all. I contacted Microsoft Support about that issue and they concluded that it was all because of the slow internet connection and there were no issues on their end and they told me to GIT GOOD (Not exactly those words). If it does sign you in, it kicks you out mid-game for some reason with the evil pop up saying "Bye User_Name". The game says that YOU signed out (Dumb game, doesn't understand Microsoft shenanigans) and returns you to the main menu. If your game didn't save, well, GOOD luck to you!
Everything takes forever to load, if it decides it's not gonna load, it gives me a really helpful error saying "Something went wrong".
Maybe it's just me, it just hates me particularly. It makes me think that Microsoft intentionally acts like a douche just to get attention..

(In the end I think, maybe, this all is not a big deal if you surrender and accept Microsoft as your overlord)

I tried a few ways to stop Windows from updating automatically, but nothing worked (Maybe, I should try again).

Maybe I should dual boot Linux, but that brings a whole new set of things that I'd have to deal with, doesn't it?

Sigh

Worked with a European consulting company to integrate some shared business data (aka. calling a service).
VP of IT called an emergency meeting (IT managers, network admins) deeply concerned about the performance of the international web site since adding our services.
VP: “The partner’s site is much slower than ours. Only common piece that could cause that is your service.”
Me: “Um, their site is vastly different than ours. I don’t think we can compare their performance to ours.”
VP: “Performance is #1! I need your service fixed ASAP!”
Me: “OK, but what exactly is slow? How did you measure their site? The servers are in Germany”
VP: “I measured performance from my house last night.”
Me: “Did you use an application?”
VP: “<laughs> oh no, I was at home. When I opened the page, I counted one Mississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi, then the page displayed.”
Me: “Wow…um…OK…uh…how long does our page take to load?”
VP: “Two Mississippi’s”
Me: “Um…wow…OK…wow…uh, no, we don’t measure performance like that, but I’ll work with our partners and develop a performance benchmark to determine if the shared service is behaving differently.”
VP: “Whatever it is, the service is slow. Bill, what do you think is slowing down the service?”
NetworkAdmin-Bill: “The Atlantic Ocean?”
VP got up and left the meeting.

OK< been a long time user of Unity.

Tried the latest update as I and others were enthusiastic about creating a joint project of gamers and developers.

As I was building up a started website and we were getting things with Unity ready...BOOM,. They Fuck up the installs.

Not just a minor thing here or there but not finding its own Fucking file locations where it installs shit. You try and say, Hey Unity you fucking twat, install here in this folder.

Boom again, it installs part of it there, and then continues installing shit everywhere else it wants to. Then the assholes at Unity give this Bullshit claim "the bug has been fixed."

Just reinstall.

Fuck you, its never that simple, You have to delete all sorts of fucking files to make sure conflicts from a previous corruption isn't just loaded on top of so it does not fuck up later.

So we did all that from programs, program data, program(x86), AppData Local, Local Low, and Roaming.

For added measure we manually removed all the crap from the registry folders (that was a pain but necessary), and then ran a cleaner to make sure all the left over shit was gone.

Thinking, OK you shit tech MoFo's we are clean and here we go.

HOLY SHIT BALLS, Its fucking worse with the LTS version it recommends and Slow as Fuck with their most recent version which is like 2020 itself, and insane piece of fucking bloated garbage and slower than a brick hard shit without fruit.

So we were going to all go post on the forums, and complain the fix section isn't fixed for shit.

Fuck us running backwards naked through a field of razor grass. Its so overloaded with complaints that they shut down further posts.

What makes this shit worse is we cannot even get the previous fucking versions of the editor before all this to work where our only option is without using the fucking Hub demand is just install 2018.

great if we started coding and testing in that. We cannot get shit where we were at back on track because you cannot fucking backward load an exported saved asset file.

Unity's suggestion? Start over.

Our Suggestion? Stop fucking smoking or using whatever fucking drug you assholes are on, you fucking disabled the gear options so we can resolve shit ourselves, and admit you did that shit and other sneaky piece of shit back stabby, security vulnerable data leak bullshit things to your end users.

Listen to your fucking experienced and long time users and get rid of the Fucking backward stepped hub piece of shit everyone with more brains than whatever piss ant pieces of shit praised that the rest of us have hated from day fucking one!

And while fixing this shit like it should be fucking fixed if you shit head bastards want to continue to exist as a fucking company, overhaul the fucking website or get the fuck out of business with now completely worthless SHIT.

Phew:
Suffice it to say....

We are now considering dealing with the learning curve and post pone our project going with unreal just because of these all around complete fuck ups that herald back to shit games of versions 3.0 and earlier.

Got my first Webdev job at a small marketing company, felt very lucky as I didn't have much experience. Turns out I'm the only one that could program. The other guys just use Wordpress. It felt wrong at first, using plugins instead of developing, but we got results and clients were happy. I felt like there was a lot less to this development thing than I'd previously thought! And so we continued.

But I noticed that some of our more plugin heavy sites (not made by me - these were made in some drag/drop Wordpress interface) were running slow. I mean 15 seconds load time slow. I joined devRant around the same time and discovered that no - this is not what normal development actually is. Wordpress seems universally hated. Thank god, because something seemed very wrong!

So with us getting complaints all over the place over page speed from relatively high-profile clients, I've gone and set up a script on a server that downloads the whole front end of these Wordpress sites and serves them up instead of the 'real' thing. Did I mention that there's basically no dynamic content on most of these sites? It works like a charm! I'm now trying to figure out how to get forms and route them into the real, hidden version of the site, as well as automatically updating the html views whenever the client changes anything in the Wordpress backend. Not sure if this has fixed the problem or just enabled bad practice, but I don't think I'm going to be able to stop the others from doing things this way...

For the record, yes there are plugins that do similar stuff but I thought it'd be nice to never use plugins again! And hey, I got to learn all about bash scripting so I can't complain.

For real though, I didn't quite realise how bad the Wordpress thing really was until I came here. Thanks for making me aware, all!

Got pulled out of bed at 6 am again this morning, our VMs were acting up again. Not booting, running extremely slow, high disk usage, etc.

This was the 6 time in as many weeks this happened. And always the marching orders were the same. Find the bug, smash the bug, get it working with the least effort. I've dumped hundreds of hours maintaining this broken shitheap of a system, putting off other duties to keep mission critical stations running.

The culprits? Scummy consultants, Windows 10 1709, and Citrix Studio.

Xen Server performed well enough, likely due to its open source origins and Centos architecture.

Whelp. DasSeahawks was good and pissed. Nothing like getting rousted out of bed after a few scant hours rest for patching the same broken system.

DasSeahawks lost his temper. Things went flying. Exorcists were dispatched and promptly eaten.

Enough. No consultants, no analysts, and no experts touched it. No phone calls, no manuals, not even a google search. Just a very pissed admin and his minion declaring blitzkrieg.

We made our game plan, moved the users out, smoked our cigs, chugged monster, and queued a gnu-metal playlist on spotify.

Then we took a wrecking ball to the whole setup. User docs were saved, all else was rm -r * && shred && summon -u Poseidon -beast Land_Cracken.

Started at 3pm and finished just after midnight. Rebuilt all the vms with RDP, murdered citrix studio (and their bullshit licenses), completely blocked Windows 10 updates after 1607, and load balanced the network.

So what do we get when all the experts are fired? Stabbed lightning. VMs boot in less than 10 seconds, apps open instantly, and server resources are half their previous usage state. My VMs are now the fastest stations in our complex, as they should be.

Next to do: install our mxgpu, script up snapshots and heartbeat, destroy Windows ads/telemetry, and setup PDQ. damn its good to be good!

What i learned --> never allow testing to go to production, consultants will fuck up your shit for a buck, and vendors are half as reliable over consultants. Windows works great without Microsoft, thin clients are overpriced, and getting pissed gets things done.

This my friends, is why admins are assholes.

Not about favorite language but about why PHP is not my favorite language.

I recently launched a web shop built on Prestashop. I found that some product pages are so god damn slow, like taking 50 fuckin' seconds to load. So I started investigating and analyzing the problem. Turns out that for some products we have so many different combinations that it results in a cartesian product totalling about 75K of unique combinations.

Prestashop did a real bad job coding the product controller because for every combination they fetch additional data. So that results in 75K queries being executed for just 1 product detail page. Crazy, even more when you know that the query that loads all these combinations, before iterating through them, takes 7 fuckin' seconds to execute on my dev machine which is a very very fast high end machine.

That said I analyzed the query and now I broke the query down into 3 smaller queries that execute in a much faster 400 ms (in total!) fetching the exact same data.

So what does this have to do with PHP? As PHP is also OO why the fuck would you always put stuff in these god damn associative arrays, that in turn contain associative arrays that contain more arrays containing even more arrays of arrays.

Yes I could do the same in C# and other languages as well but I have never ever encountered that in other languages but always seem to find this in PHP. That's why I hate PHP. Not because of the language but all those fucking retarded assholes putting everything in arrays. Nothing OO about that.

I'm having an existential crisis with this client.

We are spending millions of $s every year to make sure the product's performance is perfect. We are testing various scenarios, fine-tuning PLABs: the environment, application, middleware, infra,... And then we provide our recommendations to the client: "To handle load of XX parallel users focusing on YY, yy and Zy APIs, use <THIS> configuration".

And what the client does?
- take our recommendations and measure the wind speed outside
- if speed is <20m/s and milk hasn't gone bad yet, add 2x more instances of API X
- otherwise add 3xX, 1xY and give more CPUs to Z
- split the setup in half and deploy in 2 completely separate load-balanced prod environments.
- <do other "tweaking">

- bomb our team with questions "why do we have slow RTs?", "why did the env crash?", "why do we have all those errors?", "why has this been overlooked in PLABs?!?"

If you're improvising despite our recommendations, wtf are we doing here???

One day I will crack. Hopefully, not sometime soon.

I had spent the last year working on a online store power by woocommerce with over 100k products from various suppliers. This online store utilized a custom API that would take the various formats that suppliers offer their inventory in and made them consistent. Now everything was going swimmingly initially, but then I began adding more and more products using a plug-in called WP all import. I reached around 100k products and the site would take up to an entire minute to load sometimes timing out. I got desperate so I installed several caching plugins, but to no avail this did not help me. The site was originally only supposed to take three to four months but ended up taking an entire year. Then, just yesterday I found out what went wrong and why this woocommerce website with all of these optimizations was still taking anywhere from 60 to 90 seconds to load, or just timing out entirely. I had initially thought that I needed a beefier server so I moved it to a high CPU digitalocean VM. While this did help a little bit, the site was still very slow and now I had very high CPU usage RAM usage and high disk IO. I was seriously stumped the Apache process was using a high amount of CPU and IO along with MYSQL as well. It wasn't until I started digging deeper into the database that I actually found out what the issue was. As I was loading the site I would run 'show process list' in the SQL terminal, I began to notice a very significant load time for one of the tables, so I went to go and check it out. What I did was I ran a select all query on that particular table just to see how full it was and SQL returned a error saying that I had exceeded the maximum packet size. So I was like okay what the fuck...
So I exited my SQL and re-entered it this time with a higher packet size. I ran a query that would count how many rows were in this particular table and the number came out to being in the millions. I was surprised, and what's worse is that this table belong to a plugin that I had attempted to use early in the development process to cache the site. The plugin was deactivated but apparently it had left PHP files within the wp content directory outside of the actual plugin directory, so it's still executing scripts even though the plugin itself was disabled. Basically every time I would change anything on the site, it would recache the whole thing, and it didn't delete any old records. So 100k+ products caching on saves with no garbage collection... You do the math, it's gonna be a heavy ass database. Not only that but it was serialized data, so when it did pull this metric shit ton of spaghetti from the database, PHP then had to deserialize it. Hence the high ass CPU load. I had caching enabled on the MySQL end of things so that ate the ram. I was really desperate to get this thing running.
Honest to God the main reason why this website took so long was because the load times made it miserable to work on. I just thought that the hardware that I had the site on was inadequate. I had initially started the development on a small Linux VM which apparently wasn't enough, which is why I moved it to digitalocean which also seemed to not be enough, so from there I moved to a dedicated server which still didn't seem to be enough. I was probably a few more 60-second wait times or timeouts from recommending a server cluster to my client who I know would not be willing to purchase it. The client who I promised this site to have completed in 3 months and has waited a year. Seriously, I would tell people the struggles that I would go through with this particular site and they would just tell me to just drop the site; just take the money, just take the loss. I refused to, this was really the only thing that was kicking my ass. I present myself as this high-and-mighty developer like I'm just really good at what I do but then I have this WordPress site that's just beating the shit out of me for a year. It was a very big learning experience and it was also very humbling as well, it made me realize that I really don't know as much as I think I might. It was evidence that there is still so much more to learn out there, I did learn a lot from that experience especially about optimizing websites the different types of methods to do that particular lonely on the server side and I'll be able to utilize this knowledge in the future.
I guess the moral of the story is, never really give up. Ultimately things might get so bad that you're running on hopes and dreams. Those experiences are generally the most humbling. Now I can finally present the site that I am basically a year late on to the client who will be so happy that I did not give up on the project entirely. I'll have experienced this feeling of pure euphoria, and help the small business significantly grow their revenue. Helping others is very fulfilling for me, even at my own expense.

Anyways, gonna stop ranting. Running out of characters. If you're still here... Ty for reading :')

Today I build a queue to spread the load of the 300.000 daily caculations. To prevent slow server response time from to many analist calculating at the same time.

First run on the server I managed to get the server load to 120% and get us offline for 30 minutes.

Accepation environment and production are on the same hardware.

Today was not a good day.

What mobile browser do you all use? I used to use Chrome, then tried Firefox. But oh my God that was the worst browser I have ever used on my phone. It was slow as hell and refused to load 2/3 of the sites quickly.

Now I'm trying chrome canary and Via.

What the fuck is wrong with you Windows?
Why the hell do you take so much time to load?
Actually, FUCK YOU.
FUCK YOU FOR BEING THE ONLY OS WHERE HIGH END GAMES WORK.
FUCK YOU FOR BEING SO SO SO SLOW LIKE YOUR GRUB.

Is anyone else experiencing slow image loads on the mobile app?

Even avatars are taking a long time to load. And I'm using wifi.

>Be client
>Have an issue with incredibly slow webpage load time
>Blame memcache issues

So... I look into the problem. Yes, the page either loads up fast, or times out. So, into the logs I go. Webserver is fine (except the timeout), PHP though... Error log is fine (just notices), but slow log shows the issue is the database (of course... its always the database... ugh)

So, checking the database, there is one ugly query that seems to be an issue. 5 joins and a huge where condition.

So I run EXPLAIN on the query and... Proceed to bang my head against the wall.

OF COURSE ITS SLOW YOU FU******, NONE OF YOUR TABLES HAVE ANY INDEXES.

What do they expect when the database has to always go down the whole table and do everything in memory, until it runs out and has to dump it all on disk and work with it there.

Ugh... Some clients...

Why OneDrive is so slow?

It took almost an hour to load the whole page of 1.2 GB of photos.

Yes, my internet connection was stable that time. Thank you.

Work story.
We have this system that's being used nation-wide and basically there's a control panel for management (it's a website)) and an app for the regular users.

I just migrated and replaced the guy before me, I'm basically the only one on the project.

The code for the website is a mess, the servers are sometimes slow, and few security problems here and there.

Project Lead comes up to me and says that few of our clients that use the website are saying it works really slowly.
I start by analyzing the networking, and found shocking things.
First of all, let's say there's a messaging option, and the management teams that are our clients can have each a lot of groups, which all have messaging.

Upon first load, ALL OF THE IMAGES, FROM ALL GROUPS, ARE PRE LOADED. It can get up to few hundred photos being preloaded upon first load, which can explain the slow loading.
After discovering that, I discovered that the Administration control panel, which only my project lead can access, with sends heavy requests to the server and loads heavy assets, is loaded every time to every single client, generating heavy stress on our server and slowing everything down.

I tell that to my project lead and say that that's what causing the slow downs, I coded a fix that currently sits and is not being merged to the master branch to be deployed, and somehow I need to find a way to fix the slowness which all comes down to the heavy requests and slow connection with servers... And they won't merge my fix that fixes the loading of the administration panel so the stress on the servers could go down, and everything will be sped up....
Ah damnit.. sometimes I don't understand it..

Lets get some shit crystal clear:

- Angular is amazing.
- If you're complaining about it, then you're not experienced enough with it and you need to learn more
- Im using Angular for years, i built personal, professional and client projects with Angular as frontend and got paid thousands of USD
- I have never had any problems with angular in terms of performance, slow load time or insufficient documentation
- Angular is perfect for large projects. The structure is extremely robust and Easily lets you scale the project no matter how complex the project is
- You can have a trillion components and still be able to easily understand what each component does and add up to it because of how all the components are modularized and decoupled

After more than a year I decided to download whisper (app) again and see what was being said near me.

Holly shit the app is a total disappointment, first it crashes my fucking phone the instant I open it, I try to open it again and my God I'm presented with adds everywhere and a load speed so slow a dying tortoise would run circles around it.

The app finished loading the content and it's a clusterfuck of insipid commentary and images, "I bought beautiful new panties", "my lesbian friend doesn't think I'm cute", "any girl want to talk to me?".

After looking at the decaying state of the app I noticed I had notifications, apparently my account is active somehow, I tried to delete it but as it turns out the app has no way of doing that, YOU NEED TO CONTACT THE FUCKERS!

What the fuck?! Who the hell made this steaming pile of shit and said it was an app?!

Nothing more to add, I deleted right away.

Why the fuck do offline-enabled (music, video) apps load forever on slow network but instantaneously in airplane mode? Is it so difficult to show cached content first and refresh only once downloaded? Yes, I mean you, Spotify, Amazon Music, Amazon Video and Audible!!! 🤬

ME: *runs a load test for the umpteenth time*

RDS DB: *is slow af: HI contentions*

ME: "dear AWS support, I see the RDS has troubles writing to disk as THIS db exhibits 10x higher W latencies than THAT OTHER db we have. Both are identical, apps are identical."

AWS: "Hello, I hope you have a good day. After the investigation that took us almost 2 weeks, we can confirm that there are 10x higher IO latencies to disks: [CloudWatch link]. We also see a high load average during your tests.

We recommend investigating the high load average and tuning your queries along with the database.

I hope this helps, good day."

ME: *are you seriously calling this PREMIUM support package....?*

Database is being slow AF again. Team lead is investigating. This is happening more often lately and affects both production and dev because everything is just in one gigantic database. So clients are calling support being angry about the speed they get and us devs get to twiddle our thumbs while waiting for our own data to load.

I fucking told them that yes, i can do frontend but im in no way expert, so dont expect much.

"Yeah, cool, use angular"

I was full of questions and tried to reason with them that angular is literally just an unnecessary load and would slow the development down (its a really simple site).

"No, use angular"

Ok fine whatever. So i built the site, it was ugly as fuck, half the functionality was hacked in with jquery because i have no idea how these fucked up frameworks work (or apparently dont work) when i realized that i get jackshit from the backend.

Turns out most of the json responses were totally disregarding the json standard, like {1: tag0},{2: tag1}, where a json arrat should have been used. The other half was xml. Yeah. Also of course they used spring so the backend took like 3 months where it could have been done in like 2 weeks.

MTP is complete garbage. I want mass storage back.

The media transfer protocol (MTP) occasionally discovers new creative ways of failure. Frequently, directory listings take minutes to load or fail to load at all, and it freezes up infinitely (until disconnected) when renaming an item, and I can not even do two things simultaneously.

While files are being moved, I can not browse pictures or watch videos from the smartphone.

Sometimes, files are listed with the date 1970-01-01 (Unix epoch) instead of their correct date. Sometimes, files do not appear at all, which makes it unsafe to move directories from the device.

MTP lacks random access. If I want to play a two-gigabyte 4K 2160p video and seek in the video, guess what: I need to copy it to my computer's local mass storage first because MTP lacks random access.

When transferring high numbers of files, MTP has to slooooowly enumerate (or "prepare" or "calculate the time of") them all, which might even take longer than mass storage would need for the entire process. This means MTP might start copying or moving the actual files when mass storage is already finished.

Today, the "preparing to move" process was especially slow: five minutes for around 150 files! How am I supposed to find out what caused this random malfunction?

MTP sometimes drives me insane. I want mass storage back, at least for the MicroSD memory card, which uses a widely supported file system.

Imagine a 2010 $100 Android phone is better at file transfer than a 2022 $1000 Android phone (or iPhone, for that matter).

AAAAAAAARGH I FUCKING HATE FUCKING WEBVIEW. THAT MOTHRFUCKER IS SO FUCKING SLOW I COULD FUCKIKG OPEN UP CHROME AND GO TO THE FUCKING LINK IN LESS TIME THAN IT TAKES TO FUCKING LOAD. FUUUCK.

dude fuck fucking salesforce i fucking hate the day someone came up with the brilliant ass idea of inventing this garbage crm software that i must deal with even though it is not my area. i fucking hate the developer experience to do third-party implementations, not letting you upload changes to another environment for the sake of """"good practices"""", the fucking interface is slow as shit i could've already had intense hto sex, taken a shit, cook lunch and sleep 2 hours before it can load a single retarded lightning page.
why? WHY? WHYYY? WHY MUST THIS ASSWARE EXIST? WHY?

AS A FACT I'VE WRITTEN THIS RANT BEFORE THE DAMN PAGE EVEN LOADED A CONFIGURATION SECTION. GOD HELP US.

Found a dumb mistake I made in a query in my project.
Reduced page load from 10 sec to < 1 sec with an hour's restructuring.
Had just assumed it was slow because of my super cheap Azure DB subscription... 🙄

Mornings. Not just the run of the mill “I’m not a morning person” but I legitimately would be more productive if I could work night shift. It’s easier to think at night, and easier to sleep during the day. Not just a night owl, but it’s hard to breathe laying down at night sometimes. Sometimes I randomly can’t sleep. I’ve never had this trouble during the day during the occasions I get to sleep for long periods during the day. The morning is prime sleeping time IMO. Not wanting to wake up is one reason, but the changing weather helps and it just feels right.

I also don’t feel awake til the afternoon usually. Even if I get enough sleep and coffee. Code churns slow in the a.m.

I dream of night time being work time with long, restful naps durning the day. I feel more creative at night, and it’s easier to focus. There’s less thought of “oh it’s a nice day I should do x”

Just sucks that it’s not largely accepted and there’s not enough other night hawks to hang out with on my off days. And my work won’t let me do such a schedule. Everyone is an insufferable morning person.

Early to bed early to rise is a load of shit. We should be allowed to sleep at times it makes us happy.

I'm considering quitting a job I started a few weeks ago. I'll probably try to find other work first I suppose.

I'm UK based and this is the 6th programming/DevOps role I've had and I've never seen a team that is so utterly opposed to change. This is the largest company I've worked for in a full time capacity so someone please tell me if I'm going to see the same things at other companies of similar sizes (1000 employees). Or even tell me if I'm just being too opinionated and that I simply have different priorities than others I'm working with. The only upside so far is that at least 90% of the people I've been speaking to are very friendly and aren't outwardly toxic.

My first week, I explained during the daily stand up how I had been updating the readmes of a couple of code bases as I set them up locally, updated docker files to fix a few issues, made missing env files, and I didn't mention that I had also started a soon to be very long list of major problems in the code bases. 30 minutes later I get a call from the team lead saying he'd had complaints from another dev about the changes I'd spoke about making to their work. I was told to stash my changes for a few weeks at least and not to bother committing them.

Since then I've found out that even if I had wanted to, I wouldn't have been allowed to merge in my changes. Sprints are 2 weeks long, and are planned several sprints ahead. Trying to get any tickets planned in so far has been a brick wall, and it's clear management only cares about features.

Weirdly enough but not unsurprisingly I've heard loads of complaints about the slow turn around of the dev team to get out anything, be it bug fixes or features. It's weird because when I pointed out that there's currently no centralised logging or an error management platform like bugsnag, there was zero interest. I wrote a 4 page report on the benefits and how it would help the dev team to get away from fire fighting and these hidden issues they keep running into. But I was told that it would have to be planned for next year's work, as this year everything is already planned and there's no space in the budget for the roughly $20 a month a standard bugsnag plan would take.

The reason I even had time to write up such a report is because I get given work that takes 30 minutes and I'm seemingly expected to take several days to do it. I tried asking for more work at the start but I could tell the lead was busy and was frankly just annoyed that he was having to find me work within the narrow confines of what's planned for the sprint.

So I tried to keep busy with a load of code reviews and writing reports on road mapping out how we could improve various things. It's still not much to do though. And hey when I brought up actually implementing psr12 coding standards, there currently aren't any standards and the code bases even use a mix of spaces and tab indentation in the same file, I seemingly got a positive impression at the only senior developer meeting I've been to so far. However when I wrote up a confluence doc on setting up psr12 code sniffing in the various IDEs everyone uses, and mentioned it in a daily stand up, I once again got kickback and a talking to.

It's pretty clear that they'd like me to sit down, do my assigned work, and otherwise try to look busy. While continuing with their terrible practices.

After today I think I'll have to stop trying to do code reviews too as it's clear they don't actually want code to be reviewed. A junior dev who only started writing code last year had written probably the single worst pull request I've ever seen. However it's still a perfectly reasonable thing, they're junior and that's what code reviews are for. So I went through file by file and gently suggested a cleaner or safer way to achieve things, or in a couple of the worst cases I suggested that they bring up a refactor ticket to be made as the code base was trapping them in shocking practices. I'm talking html in strings being concatenated in a class. Database migrations that use hard coded IDs from production data. Database queries that again quote arbitrary production IDs. A mix of tabs and spaces in the same file. Indentation being way off. Etc, the list goes on.
Well of course I get massive kickback from that too, not just from the team lead who they complained to but the junior was incredibly rude and basically told me to shut up because this was how it was done in this code base. For the last 2 days it's been a bit of a back and forth of me at least trying to get the guy to fix the formatting issues, and my lead has messaged me multiple times asking if it can go through code review to QA yet. I don't know why they even bother with code reviews at this point.

I thought iPhone simulator was ONE THING that worked smoothly but NO, it is also a load of crap, hogging away the memory. Can’t develop ANYTHING without spoiling the mood because of this slow performance. It’s the same with android studio, Xcode, android emulators, and now simulator with vscode is doing the same thing. It’s 2020 you’d think a developer can write code smoothly on a huge MacBook Pro but no what a fucked up world, I’m hungry again, I have eaten up everything what to do I hate fruits !!

Me: Wants to access an IP camera from home. Goes to url on mac. “Plugin required” press install “Not found”, google it: “ActiveX is deprecated and only works in IE.” Installs windows 7 on a virtual machine: runs IE “page can’t be load, browser not supported” looks for other way: got access: Sooooo slow After all that spent time: forget it I don’t wanna see it anymore.

CTO at my previous company think that wordpress based website is took a long time to load.
I suggest to use caching and fix ton of abusive query, He refused. He spun up more VM, upgrade the ec2 instance level to the max. Said that he resolved the problem. But the problem still persist actually.
Blame me for slow response website, blame me for late of deployment because data is not ready ( there's a lot of spam in there, we need to clean it before )
I left the company, Coworker said that he just install a bunch of caching plugin,
He made the website down for entire day and don't understand what is happening. Ask other developer to fix it quickly, to do unpaid overime
The site is back to bussiness, said to all team that he already fixed it.
Everything good happened, he claimed that it was his idea.

And the best part is : he put 'ssh' as skill list in his personal site

I swear the God I'm considering getting a rabied dog just to bite your balls off in case I ever see you in the streets..

- guys X are running load tests on env A
- load tests complete
- analysis of test results is being done
- slow response times are obsered
- someone asks whether X guys took a thread dump for further analysis
- a guy from team X (Mr. Xx) replies: "Will take the Thread Dump now."
- 10 minutes later uploads the whole fucking 2GB log file to Slack
- Xx replies: "I do not see anything wrong in the dump"

A fucking retard... Shove that useless dump up your ass and THEN tell me there's nothing wrong with it! Why the FUCK do you think that's the case? Moron

Is it just me or is devRant slow today? Takes ages to load rants :(

Spotify app is so full of shit. Everything is so slow, downloaded songs still load slow if there is no internet connection, the ui is atrocious. It's so bad I found myself unconsciously switching to using youtube more and more despite it requiring me to keep the screen alive.

I know nothing about this.
Let's say your computer is on all night, and then you hit it in the morning, just re-activating all your windows... for me, it's always like a 10 minute wait until it "catches up".

I realized this morning, like, why doesn't it optimize itself while I'm away, so that when i do come back, that 10 min wait doesn't happen.

I'm sure they have thought of this, so why does it take so fucking long to wake up your computer.

Is it me or is GitLab freakishly slow to load?

IBM Cloud seems to be the only cloud computing platform that has a responsive website.

Admittedly I have only used GCP and AWS, I haven't touched Azure yet. Both GCP and AWS have incredibly slow web portals that take ages to load after every single click.

IBM Cloud is the only cloud service platform when I clicked a button and it loaded the next page like a normal website. It honestly felt surreal to navigate through all of their services. I have no clue why AWS and GCP are both so bad, it reflects really poorly on their services. If they can't get their own web portals to run quickly, why should I expect their services to be fast and reliable?

my new rig is more and more causing me issues:

- Ryzens fucking kill 9x and MS-DOS applications and the OSes themselves when they run unemulated, so they can't be run in a KVM. This makes them slow as shit, and in qemu-TCG's case, buggy as shit too. VMs can't reboot successfully, they have to be totally forced down and brought back up on TCG or they hang during the reboot. It also performs poorly. VERY poorly. The "shit runs full-speed like 65% of the time and it feels slow as fuck as video output is a stuttery blurry mess" type. This makes 2 projects problematic to complete and I have to remake 17 VMs in virt-manager now as vbox doesn't work with any virtualization method for a 9x/DOS guest now!

- For some reason my new RX 5500xt has an issue when it hits about 80% usage, the fans spin to 100% on it at 80% and taper off to like 5% when idle. Pretty standard stuff... except it's erroneously tied to... current load, not temperature. Hmm.

- Debian got an update that renames my ethernet device mid-boot. Up until just before the login screen, it's named "eth0". After that, it's named "enp8s0". This was hell to work around and idk why it does this.

I'm trying to convince my dad to switch to the Linux. Everyday he complains about his laptop being slow (although it has pretty much same specs like my laptop), the forced updates on Windows 10, how long it takes to load programs and stuff. He only uses Opera and LibreOffice for work, he doesn't have iPhone so he's not locked by iTunes. Perfect case study!

Yet every time I tell him that Linux doesn't force updates on you, runs faster and has all the software he needs, he says that "he's not a programer like I am". Then I reply to him "and that's a thing! Linux Mint for example doesn't even require to open terminal" (plus few years back he wanted to try it out)...

Any tips boys and girls? Should I give up or not? I mean, forcing the change will not do, but I also don't want to hear complains about Windows every day.

Laravel being easy to use is far from a strong point. "Easy to use" is a cool thing for pro developers who know what's going on under the hood and don't wanna write the same thing a hundred times.
It should translate into good developers being able to work immediately, not in bad developers getting away with whatever without getting even a slight warning just because the framework itself accepts whatever weird crap you can come up with while you're training.
But that's what it became: a free for all for every noob out there. You find yourself working with a slow application (and by "slow" I mean "slow even by Laravel's standards", which are fairly low), and as soon as you look what's going on you find someone decided to load a hundred thousand middlewares, queries optimized like ass on top of Eloquent, and the whole application breaks as soon as you just run config:cache to try speeding it up a little bit, because env-ing your way out of whatever problem is so quick. Easy to use needs to be there for pro developers; give such a tool to a newbie, you end up with a maintenance nightmare

Fuck you Microsoft for adding so many unnecessary fetures that nobody Needs/wants to use and which also slow down my pc.
I am specifically talking About that sily history-feature which is present for a few months now.
Guess what? I don't need it! Why? BECAUSE I DON'T USE EDGE SO THERE IS NO HISTORY TO LOAD. I DON'T USE (NEITHER I WAN'T TO) YOUR SLOW PHOTOS APP TO SEE IT IN THE WINDOWS HISTORY. I DON'TUSE ANY OF YOOUR SILLY INBUILT UWP APPS.
Since the update which added this feature, my pc is like 2 times slower, because it loads the whole last-5 months history.

Hey, thank you for nothing!

So I literally added a "slow mode" switch to the application. A line in the config which is directly passed to the Thread.sleep()
Imagine that, when under heavy load, performance increased.

I ended my Medium Subscription today.

Reason:
Non Technical =>
Repetitive posts, often by the same author saying pretty much the same thing.
Multiple copied of the same post being suggested all the time.
Click baity titles which have no real content.
Amazing amount of self promotion rather than any actual value in the article.

Technical=>
Very slow loading of media on the pages, videos don't even load.
Provided solutions in tech based articles often unconventional, super harmful in long term if you have them in your code.

I do agree that they definitely have some good content, but I don't feel it's enough to make me stay given all these issues.
I'd rather just use it on my pc without logging in.

The website load time is so fucking slow!!
FIX IT!!

And i saw the images they uploaded was a jupiter-sized images.

It's the devs fault for not making validation.

But me, as a designer must help them resize those fucking already uploaded images to be web-friendly.

Technical question that I just cant find the answer to anywhere.

I have a load balancer and want it to pass the IP of the original caller to the server. Usually it is done by modifying the header? of the Request HTTP packet? and adding X-Forwarded-For: ....

The LB team though says it needs to modify X-Originating-IP and somehow causes a noticeable impact of the speed of all requests.

I don't know the details but it should only modify the first Packet that has the HTTP headers and should be appending X-Forwarded-For. If only need to modify the Header packet, how can it slow down the whole interaction so much:

-Adds 100ms to a 200ms request
-Increases a 10 minute download to like 20-30 minutes

So I just installed Elementary OS Loki on my older desktop and for that the wifi is incredibly slow, like 30 seconds to load googles home page. It also randomly stops working, and gives a no network connection. When this system was on windows I would average 50~ mb/s down speed, changing it to Linux I'm lucky to maintain 2mb/s. I've been googling for hours and nothing I try seems to work, any Linux pros here able to give me some suggestions. The network card in the PC is an Aetheros one, I it supports a,b,g,n and Bluetooth, I'm currently using the desktop with a Bluetooth mouse / kbd. (None of the hardware/setup has changed since using windows)

!rant

I was just browsing around on devRant as usual and I got an idea. Though I'm pretty sure many people must have had it already.

But still, don't you guys think it would be nice to not hide the rant when you tap on it to expand because on slow networks it takes a long time to load the whole rant so we as users could just read the short version of the rant while it's being loaded and save some time. We could then just tap a long rant for it to expand and then read the smaller version until it does, it'll just save time I think.

Sorry if it sounds stupid..! :/

Does any one feel devrant is slow to load rants and images on mobile app? Tried both cellular and multiple wifis. Internet doesn't seem to be the problem here

This seems to be happening for a few weeks now

I'm trying to waste time reading rants, but don't get half of them because our work wifi network is too slow to load pictures

fml

Is GraphQL worth it? It promisses to keep some load away from backend programmers but what about this scenario:
There's a list of items with scroll load/infinite scroll. There can be several filters as well as the Option to change the ordering of the list items.
With "traditional" REST, I'll hit the DB with one request, get the data in the right order to the backend, might itterate over it once to add additional information, cache the result in Redis/Memcache and send it off.
Using GraphQL, the frontend has to load all entries first, sort them in JS (which probably is slow on mobile devices), and then display it. No matter how "expensive" the query is, there's no caching.

Is that about it? Did I get something backwards?

Spent all afternoon and night, trying to get Windows reinstalled on my old college laptop because my dad needed another pc since I'll be using his personal laptop to wfh.

1. DVD Drive is faulty, slow/faulty reads
2. I don't have product keys (they're all stores on a USB disk, I should make a backup... that I didn't bring back to their place) except for Vista and Win 8 but Win 8 key already used by another PC. I have a burned Win 7 disc
3. Apparently it had a virus which was never removed, fresh reinstall never done. It hides the DVD drives and kills the internet and makes the installers think there's only 400MB.
4. I followed some wiki that said to Mark the C drive as Active... Which fixed the issue but then I decided to do the full install from boot... Except on reboot, apparently this fcked up the MBR
5. Tried googling how to fix the MBR, eventually found some USB app that supposedly fixes it. Create a USB boot disk, not recognized
6. Finally try the DVDs and release it recognize them somewhat when booting... Win 7 one kept hanging on the load screen
7. Somehow Vista got thru and actually installed...

Now IE and Chrome both complain about HTTPS issues and how they don't support Vista...

But at least my dad now had a laptop he can use to do non-work stuff while he uses his company laptop to do work.

Had to send my new, shit Nokia phone in for repair as the forced update fucked half the built-in apps. My dad tells me "use my old phone for now, it's terrible." He hands me an LG V20.

Spec relations:
Nokia 3.1 A vs LG V20
RAM: 264MB free w/ nothing running vs 1342MB free w/ nothing running
CPU: 4-core 1.7GHz vs 4-core 2.1GHz
Onboard storage: 16GB/5GB user-accessible vs 64GB/51.5GB user-accessible
Battery life: 7 hours under load to 4 hours under load

I don't think he's getting this back.

(He doesn't use it as "it's so slow" but like... with proper care, the only issue is that switching apps sometimes doesn't fully clean the LCD of the old app and it burns in really fast, but minor annoyances for a WAY better device?)

Iterating over 50 rows of data with selenium takes 8-10 seconds according to System.currentTimeMillis() But opening the site itself takes 65-70 seconds by itself. Why is this site so damn slow even opening it normally it’s slow as fuck and headless mode doesn’t help much if at all

Doesn’t matter much since I can just sit and let it do it’s 4000 iterations but I really ducking hate that 60 seconds just to load the damn page

Is there a search engine indexing pages that work without JavaScript?
Why?
- I use the Lynx text-mode browser
Why else? Maybe I'm naïve:
- At least without JavaScript the advert/tracking methods will not slow load times or break the page.
- This may be a nice way to highlight websites that don't have time to join an SEO/analytics arms race.

Is it just me or is devrant a little bit slow to load rants. If so why is that? What should be done to make it better?

What free web hosting to never use
000webhost (annoying watermark, main site takes 1 to 2 minutes to load)
InfinityFree (retarded staff, slow asf)
AwardSpace (only 1 gb of space)
What to use: ct8.pl (polish and 5000 user limit, supports .exe files)

I need help trying to explain to my boss. Iframes are going to load slow no matter what. Then he shows a page where a iframe loads pretty. decently well. He fucking doesn't understand that even a blank iframe can slow everything.

I really like Linux but it makes me mad when apps I use, like Adobe XD, are available for everything but Linux.

I'm not even going to start with HBO not being able to load streams on Linux. I payed money to stare at a black screen.

I tried to use PlayOnLinux for Adobe Creative Cloud but XD doesn't even appear there.

I also hate dual booting because when I'm using Win or Linux for a bit I tend to make different desktops for different programs/IDEs/browsers and I like them to be open at all times for easy access when I want to do shit. Dual booting means having to open all this again

VMs are even worse in that they tend to be very slow and when I see choppiness when moving windows I immediately "nope" out of that shit

I can't put up with Windows's bs anymore, but not being able to use the software I need is even worse.

I don't know what to do

*SmartClient*
Almost destroy our enterprise project with 50 plus team members. Its just unbelieveable slow to load in browser.
INSERT INTO bad_memory;

So my job have a hood monetary value, it's pre-IPO and I still need to complete a year for 25 percent of RSU offering.
The bad thing is work is vanilla and load is a lot. I have been slacking off and working just enough to let thing go by but now a days that's not even possible. My manager provides me bad feedbacks, alright it's only been 4 months here, I see no one I can take advice from. I just don't want to exist. It's so boring. So much effort for nothing. Seriously nothing. I have tried a lot last month, but that's not even taken as a good thing, as I'm new I'm supposed to be slow but that's being pointed out a lot of times. I haven't gone to office, I don't have coworkers to talk to. It's just not working out for me.