Piece of shit admin installed a chrome plugin which changed the new tab to no internet default image ... The whole office was pranked

IOS SUCKS!! SWIFT SUCKS !! OBJECTIVE-C SUCKS!! SUCK MY DICK APPLE YOU PIECE OF SHIT !! Why did you have to make the language sooo counter intuitive, and so different from the popular languages you pain in the ass piece of shit, Why can't I throw exceptions from a constructor of a class?? Why do I have to use a fucking struct to just throw exceptions?? Can't class constructions fail you peice of shit?? huh? GOD DAMN IOS MAGGOT DEVELOPERS IF I EVER RUN INTO THOSE FUCKERS IM GONNA FUCKING RAPE EM BURN THEM ALIVE AND HAVE THEM FOR DINNER

I lost my sanity and googled ”FUCK YOU XCODE YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT”...

That's how I found devRant.

> Receive sudden phone call in the middle of the night
> Check caller, unknown number
> "Either something bad happened or it's something urgent. I'd better answer."
> "Hello?"
> Friend of friend of friend says he updated his gpu drivers and now has some random fps drops.
> I was in a good mood so I agreed to help him over teamviewer, even though I don't know him.
> Downgrading to an older version of nvidia driver seemed to have fixed the drops.
> 5 minutes later, he calls again. His headset is not working properly.
> Helped him fix the issue over teamviever.
> This continued for at least 2 hours, calling me every 5 minutes to install just another driver or change some random win setting. Turned out he had some retard format his pc because he thought it'd "make it go faster".
> Calls me again, this time he's pc isn't booting up at all. After 20 minutes on the phone the fucktard admits he just tried to reformat his pc because "my pc automatically installed a bad windows update" ( no, I don't understand either) but he fucked it up.
> I begin explaining him how to make a bootable usb stick, how to change the boot order etc to reinstall windows. I even suggested that I'd help him setup win/drivers after windows's done installing.
> He lets me go for about an hour explaining.
> "So that's it. When the setup is over, call me again and I'll help you install the drivers."
> "Bro this sounds complicated, why don't you come over? This won't even take you 5 minutes"

YOU MOTHERFUCKING PIECE OF SHIT
YOU FUCKING TRASH
CALL ME AGAIN AND I'LL SHOVE YOUR GIGABYTE GEFORCE GTX1060 6GB UP YOUR ASS, PERPENDICULARLY

The motherfucker even called me "bro"

"Look I found a good use of this piece of shit printer"

Dave you're a piece of shit

Days upon days I've spent on making this shit. Now the PC doesn't recognize it as a fucking hub, and instead it's just a glorified LED with some audio connectors next to it. What a fantastic waste of time 😑

A blue screen a day,
keeps the productivity away!!

FUCK!!!

Person at work, staring at my keyboard: How much was it?
Me: The keyboard? Oh it's a cheap one for around $30.
Person: Huh... I'll never get you rich boys and your fads.

Well, I don't fucking judge you for your $600 phone, or your $80 shoes or shirts, you cuntwaffle. Fuckin' asshole has the face of a horse's left testicle, is always on his phone, which is arguably fine since he's not a dev but still fuck him, and has the gall to call me bringing my mechanical keyboard to work a 'rich fad'. Oh, that's rich coming from you. Ever seen your ugly mug in your undeserved branded clothing, you unloved, shit-gobbling piece of shit?

"You type so loud." And you breathe too loud but I don't tell you to stop but maybe I ought to.

Go suck on your daddy-uncle's chode for a couple more bucks and stop hanging around me, you judgemental cum-snorting piece of shit.

P.s. it's a cheap keyboard with blue switches but the office is normally noisy and busy enough that no one gives a shit about it. Planning on buying an Anne Pro sometime next month.

So my fucking shit Epson printer can't print black and white without colour ink cartridges. FUCK YOU YOU FUCKING MONEY SUCKING PIECE OF SHITE.

Sometimes I write inline CSS because I'm a lazy piece of shit.

Microsoft creates a new chat bot:
Day 1
User : hi
Chatbot: hello, how's yours day? 😁

One month later:
User: hi
Chatbot: fuck off your piece of shit.😡

IE8 YOU MOTHERFUCKING PIECE OF SHIT.

HP printer: *starts acting on its own*
*pulls plug*

NOW WHO FUCKING OWNS YOU, FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT?!! WHO PAID COLD HARD FUCKING MONEY FOR YOU HUH, FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT?!!!!

Don't you ever dare to do anything again, unless I fucking tell you to, fucking worthless piece of shit, that can't even do its printer jobs properly!!! WORTHLESS FUCKING PIECE OF JUNK!!!

Guess I'll leave it unplugged until I have a new print job for it at this point. Geez, can't even trust my fucking printer to do what it's supposed to anymore!!! Long live the world in Big Brother. Lest we forget that there exists such a thing as fucking ownership!!!

To the dev who wrote this piece of shit:

Please, stop writing code, NOW!

You absolute piece of shit.
Fuck you.
I hope your sleeves slide down every single time you wash your hands.

Eclipse is a piece of shit.

Fucking piece of shit forum won't let me view a fucking jpg file without creating a fucking account. Fuck you.

MOTHERFUCKING MICROSOFT!!! JUST SEND ME THIS FUCKING EMAIL !!!! WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?!? EVERY FUCKING TIME IT TAKES TOOOOOOO MUUUUUCH TIME TO RECEIVE ANY FUCKING CONFIRMATION EMAIL!!! ITS FUCKING 2017 ALREADY GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER YOU PIECE OF SHIT

>Firefox randomly freezes
>Opens taskmanager
>spots Cortana running but "suspended"
>kills Cortana
>Firefox unfreezes

DAFAK MICROSOFT, GO FUCK OFF WITH YOUR FUCKING USELESS PIECE OF SHIT CORTANA

Even if you ask me a million times Google, I am not going to accept it. Data-hungry piece of shit -.-

I have a co-worker that always uses "I'm too old" as an excuse.

You're 33. You're just a lazy piece of shit that doesn't take care of his body.

Fuck you, do work.

Today is my birthday.
I wish I wasn't such a lazy piece of shit and actually get my personal projects done.

Thanks in advance, birthday wish granter.

FOUR DAYS

Tomorrow will be the FOURTH FUCKING DAY spent trying to get this piece of shit iOS simulator to not crash the app.

I’VE TRIED EVERYTHING.

FUCK APPLE. FUCK XCODE. FUCK IOS😠😤😠😤😠😤😠😤😠😤

Steve Jobs was a twat, and the IPhone X garbage piece of technology

Skype for business is a total fucking piece of shit.

🎶 On the sixth day of debugging my program gave to me ...

6 failed tests
5 help forums
4 broken dependencies
3 edge cases
2 moving specs
And 1 keyboard smashed in rage 🎶

This little carol is dedicated to the buggy-as-fuck nodejs project I was given for fixes and updates.

Happy holidays everyone

xCode is the worst piece of shit IDE ever created.

Hhhmmmmmmm a useless piece of shit like always it is then

Fucking Jira!

You fucking piece of fucking shit. You're about as useful as a nacho cheese enema.

Fuck Atlassian, fuck Jira, fuck fuck fuck fuck!

FUCKING FRONTEND DEVELOPING PIECE OF SHIT.

Why the fuck does justify-content: center behaves differently on chrome, Firefox and IE?

JESUS FUCKING CHRISTMAS GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER

First time I was scared and decided not to use a ATM machine, since that piece of shit Windows device notified me about some new USB hardware detected :)

50 euros just TO BE ABLE TO WIPE MY FUCKING ASS

FUCK YOU, PIECE OF SHIT HOARDERS, WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU BUYING SO MUCH TOILET PAPER

STOP BREAKING FOR NO FUCKING REASON YOU FRAGILE PIECE OF BUG-INFESTED SHIT

I’M NOT EVEN TOUCHING ANYTHING WTH

Me: "What a stupid piece of shit documentation and software, it does not work!!!!!!!"

Also me: "Oh, this typo made everything _not-work_"

you might think that windows updates are painful but this piece of shit has been like this for an hour JUST LET ME FUCKING DEPLOY

No, css is not evil, that God forsaken mother fucking useless piece of horse shit wanking ass fucking whore framework known as bootstrap is.

So this happen on my previous workplace. I worked there for 4 years and quitting was the best decision I made while was there.

One manager/owner there was the most toxic, piece of shit, disrespectful cunt I have ever worked with. The type of guy that comes in and every person's productivity goes down in a heartbeat.

As he was a owner he usually came in later. This one morning it was 11-ish and a meeting with a client was happening and it was an open space.

He comes in.
He puts his laptop down.
He sits.
He screams of the top of his lungs:
- WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?
- ANTS ALL OVER MY DESK!!!
- I CAN'T WORK LIKE THIS.

He leaves for about 30 min.
He came back with a can of spray, and literally intoxicated the office and everybody had to stop working.

And there you go one of my last place's beautiful stories.

Just bought a bmi scale, confirmed what I already know: I am just a lazy piece of shit.

Get fit and be healthy.

Never trust Windows to do anything right

FUCK Android, whoever invented this piece of shit should be really proud of themselves... And yes, this rant comes from an iOS developer who's working on a project in react-native... Why the fuck everything should always work on iOS but the same thing is fragile as shit on Android? Why the fuck there's a thousand of different versions of every Android package and every single one breaks another? Why the fuck Android is so fragmented... If this piece of shit is the definition of "openness" then I'd really prefer the "closeness" of iOS... Totally reminds me of how much I hated IE6 back in the web development days

WTF BOSS?

STOP WRITING THESE FUCKING OBVIOUS SQL INJECTABLE CODE YOU STUPID PIECE OF SHIT!!!

BURN MOTHERFUCKER, BURN!!!

Dear dev at my company:

FUCK YOU AND YOUR PIECE OF SHIT API.

Have I? You're asking me?

I have no fucking clue Lync, I don't see anything. Why don't you tell me if I have ... and then where it is!

Fuck you Citrix you piece of shit!

Seriously, FUCK Safari, piece of shit browser

Me: hm yes this will be easiest in python

Me, 10 minutes later: fuck python why am i using this piece of shit

I consider myself a fucking lazy piece of shit that could probably could come up with something amazing if I wasn't the lazy piece of shit I am.

No, I do not wish to work on your Scrum-managed project.

I do not wish to contribute to the Taylorism of my profession.

I do not wish to be an interchangeable cog in your software sausage machine.

I do not wish to be tracked by some pointless metrics like a call-centre worker.

I do not wish to bust my tight, cute ass to sprint after some idiotic management request that could have been factored in earlier.

I do not wish to obtain some piss-ant qualification that "authorises" me to do my job.

I do not wish to be party to your lie that technical debt will be avoided by refactoring---whatever the cost.

I do not wish to contribute to the death of software engineering to have it replaced by software development.

Agile? Sure. I can pick up the phone and talk to the client, users and fellow devs. After all, that's what it FUCKING MEANS. Communi-fucking-cation.

See that burndown chart? See your anus? Know what's happening next?

Fuck Scrum and every fucking bottom-feeder that is scamming a living by promoting it. You're killing this business.

Hugs and kisses,

Platypus

Just got a new work laptop last week. An upgrade from a crappy consumer grade piece of shit to a proper business grade 8c/16t laptop feels good.
Also Fedora.

Got some feedback for an app today via email...
"You are a fucking idiot! Stupid piece of shit!" Well, I guess one user didn't like it then... Rude fucking wankhat!

I fucking hate group projects.

These fucking dumbasses that don't know how to write shit. "This is a software that connects to THE phone" in a fucking business letter.

I bet a fucking second grader can write better than this piece of shit.

iOS 11 you buggy piece of shit!

Layouts breaking all around, can’t figure out if it’s in landscape or portrait mode, lock menu disapearing, minimizing apps breaks them...

Oooh, you invented a GENIUS NEW option to turn mobile data on from launch control, but WiFi and Bluetooth buttons don’t turn these off, but disconnect from current network... WHOSE SMART ASS IDEA WAS THAT? BURN IN UX HELL ASSHOLE!

Haven’t seen a worse update since Vista...

android studio.

what a piece of shit.

Had the first DDOS battle in my life lads, fuck me that was hard. I somehow managed to block these assholes, and some piece of shit was extorting money out of our business by messaging us in telegram. What a piece of shit.

Just started my Android development internship. Atleast now I don't feel like a worthless piece of shit who wastes the whole day.

I hate it when your non dev friend uses top notch hardware and I am stuck with a piece of shit junk

How to appropriately deal with a piece of shit scammer.

My name's not even Deanna.

YOU FUCKING FUCK PIECE OF FUCKING SHIT XCODE I FUCKING WISH YOU DISAPPEAR FROM THIS FUCKED UP WORLD!
What I did:
1. Scroll right on "Magic Mouse"
2. Profit! (XCode crash!)

What doesn't kill you makes you a god damn fucking useless piece of shit task manager
windows :@

I'm fairly sure that even if I were to run Windows 10 on a machine with double ECC, it'd still BSOD because of poor memory management. Because why on Earth would Microsoft support such a basic, essential thing properly, hmm?!!

Oh and let's add HDMI to the existing list of ACPI and USB. How difficult can it possibly be to support those basic, most standardized fucking hardware protocols? Pretty fucking insanely hard apparently!!!

Dear XCode I hope you fucking burn in hell you piece of shit! can't do anything without that shit either indexing, or freezing, or crashing!
FUCK YOU BITCH!

Safari is a piece of fucking piece of fucking shit

I really hate fucking Wordpress!

I hate it's stupid API, with it's stupid hooks and actions and all those stupid functions and no fucking logic to any of it!

I hate it's stupid plugin system, with all that fucking overhead that brings no real value and adds all that complexity for nothing!

I hate stupid fucking multiple calls for the same fucking assets, loading them over and over again because every stupid plugin calls them again and again!

I hate motherfucking SHORTTAGS, or whatever the fuck they are called!

I hate that every stupid fucking plugin and shortcode and fucking every little fucking piece of HTML comes from a different fucking place, with different fucking structure and different fucking classes and stupid fucking loading seaquences that make no fucking sense!

And I hate fucking page builders !!!!!

Fuck!!!!

I should be fucking coding on this fucking peace of shit, but I just cannot fucking take it any more!!!

IT NEEDS TO FUCKING DIE!

It should be relegated to the darkest corners of the internet and all the servers that have it's fucking code anyware on their systems should be disconnected and buried in the deepest pits of hell, just to be sure it never, EVER, surfaces again!!!

AAARRRRGGGHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!

WanBLowS, you data hungry piece of shit! WHAT IN THE NAME OF FUCK MAKES YOU THINK THAT I WANT TO SIGN IN?!! Motherfuckers!!!

When you're about to install a small program (54mb) and you need 1gig of dependencies. And the dependencies need two gigs of dependencies of their own. Proprietary piece of shit. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Vodafone is a piece of shit.

fuck you!!! i discovered that trick months ago and told you about it so many fucking times you piece of shit dont take credit!!!

I am a terrible designer. When i say terrible i mean my designs for website somehow always manage to look like an ugly piece of shit.

Halp?

Its my morning rant time... Me and my team are working on implementing our solution into 20 year old piece of shit POS system which:
1. Uses old piece of shit computers - which is slower than average calculator.
2. Uses .Net 2.0 - and no higher versions could be installed.
3. Has 20 year old documentation - outdated as fuck.
4. Throws unknown and non explainable COMExceptions.
5. Works slow as fuck.

And we have to deal with all its issues as 3rd side integration.. FUCK... FUCK.. FUCK....

Hey im gonna take pip and shove it up my fucking asshole along with the people who made that piece of shit (:

Every fucking port is fucking blocked on the fucking piece of shit fucking server. FUCK YOU

Omg visual studio is a piece of SHIT!

I'd rather code java in eclipse than another line of c# in visual studio.

Once you work in IntelliJ other IDE's are awful.

Windows 10 is a fucking piece of shit. It's the worst software ever made. It's the worst program ever written in the entire computer history.

* adds one second of sleep in test
* git commit -m "Fix test"

slow ass piece of hot steaming pile of shit, monolithic, resource-wasting, overly complex, overpriced government service. DIE

If you are a father and you find out your kind produced a pile of shit, you change the diaper and get rid of it all. No questions asked.

If you are a developer and your colleague produces pile of shit and you try to get rid of it, you end up in meetings how this piece if shit is actually master piece of shit and have to argue about it to manager that knows shit about a shit.

I pay over $100 per year for Apple's piece of shit developer program and the app store connect website isn't even accessible right now.

Great.

Finally finished setting up my private Git Repo.

First tried to install Gitlab, tried 2 hours to fix it. Holy shit the configs were a shit piece. Ended up at the end with a 502 error.

Fucking hate Gitlab, go die you piece of shit for dedicated servers.

Removed it and installed Gogs. Had 25 Minutes to set it up completly and I'm happy with it. ✌️

Dont won't to spent 7$ on private Repos for Github, when I have my own high power dedicated Server 😜

Visual studio is a fucking piece of trash IDE and it should be banned from programming because of how SHIT it is, how can it not let met fucking reference things properly, why can't I acess the FUCKING FOLDER I'VE JUST CREATED, how can it not recognize that I've just added a folder from outside??

WHY EVERYTHING NEEDS TO BE DIFFUCULT WITH IT??????

Why can't it be smart like Android Studio :cries:

YOU ARE A FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT MICROSOFT, FIX YOUR FUCKING STUPID PIECE OF SHIT WORTHLESS DUMB IDE, FUCKING BILLIONAIRE COMPANY THAT CAN'T MAKE A SMART IDE, DUMB FUCK VISUAL STUDIO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

INTERNET EXPLODER AND M$ OS 7 WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING YOU LITTLE PIECE OF CTHULHU SHIT

THIS FUCKING DEBUGGER IS IGNORING MY FUCKING BREAKPOINTS

GO TO HELL YOU PIECE OF SHIT

AND RSPEC: FUCK YOUR LIMITED METHOD HIT-COUNTING BULLSHIT! ONE HIT-COUNT PER METHOD FOR THE ENTIRE SPEC IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH!

FJA;KLGAKLGJFKSDHG

Oh GODDAMIT Nexus!!!

You gotta love it when you're in a hurry, unlock the fucking phone while it is plugged in to the goddamn charger, and the bloody thing just fucking shuts down because the battery is apparently empty. WHEN YOU HAVE A FUCKING 15 WATT CHARGING CABLE STUFFED UP YOUR BUTT?!!

You know Google, if I wanted an iPhone battery with tons of little "features", don't you think that I would've bought a fucking iPhone?!

OpenGL, you outdated piece of shit. 😤

Dear Apple, why not make Swift good instead of a piece of shit? Just a thought.

Fucking piece of shit windows 10!
Screw you to hell!
Disk usage : 100%
Memory usage: 60%
CPU usage: 2%

Sluggish as hell! And downloading updates without even asking! How fucking dare you!

Stuck with this shit just because of Photoshop and Illustrator.

I don't fucking believe it! Who the fuck navigates on right click!? Invision, you fucking piece of shit! Can't you do one fucking thing right?

Fuck this piece of shit!
Windows 11 and Teams.
Fucking garbage!

I've been debugging a bug for two days straight and I have only thing to say:

fuck javascript a piece of shit

Fucking piece of shit xorg and amd drivers. Wasted so much time trying to fix screen tearing and nothing works, only managed to kill xorg altogether

Added a pic of the tearing

Xcode, the most piece of shit motherfucking IDE!!!

Top reason to not be a dev?

Because you could't get through 9th grade Algebra you dumb piece of shit.

hey helo i doNT GIVE A SHIT THAT YOU CANT READ MY DOCUMENTATION AND SPAM ME WITH QUESTIONS THAT HAVE THE ANSWER WRITTEN IN THE SPECIFICATION YOU WROTE IM PLAYING FUCKING LEAGUE YOU DUMB PIECE OF SHIT

Power BI is fucking piece of shit

Unreliable piece of shit!

The piece of shit ‘edge’ is now available on Mac... Yippee!

Hate being in bed and a solution for a problems comes to mind and sleep is really needed. Makes me feel like a stupid useless piece of shit. Then I wake up and try it and it doesn't work anyways, so I am a useless piece of shit.

Skype for business is the most useless fuking piece of shit enterprise joke of a software. Fuck you microsoft.

o2 business login. The whole interface is built in flash. Fucking Flash! Can't even login! No fallback. WTF!!! Useless piece of shit bastards.

one gotta love Cordova piece of shit -.-
Tested app on browser all is good, deployed on phone and that shit wasn't able to access internet, turned out I needed another cordova plugin for this shit to work.

XCode, I'm sorry bro you are much less pain than cordova :(

WHY is Win10 such a PIECE OF SHIT !!!

When a coworker repeatedly alters GIT to include log files that only break the shit out of everything. That's fine, I like reverting production on a daily basis.

Thanks 1,000,000 John.
Enjoy your cocktails while I lay under the vending machine, you piece of shit.

I wish Windows 10 wasn't a piece of shit

javascript is a piece of shit

Firefox is a useless piece of shit on Mac.

Facebook you fucking piece of shit! Oh, React, not you love. You are great.

Opencv, you are powerful, but you are one big fat piece of horse shit. Period.

Seriously, fuck Xcode up the ass with a hot poker. What a piece of shit. It can’t even handle graphics as well as MacDraw circa 1989

Hey Instagram, let this serve as a piece of advice on your algorithm for suggested posts.

IT 👏 DOESN'T 👏 FUCKING 👏 WORK.

I have to do this daily, and the piece of shit still thinks I'm into nature and National Parks. BUT IM NOT.

Fuck off Windows Defender.

I love Windows but this defender shit is fucking annoying me with it's popup messages to enable SmartScreen. Fuck you and your piece of shit SmartScreen.

Not exactly new, but just so it does not get forgotten:

FUCK ECLIPSE.

Fuck that stupid piece of shit IDE and everything related to it.

sometimes, editing bad code, makes me wanna meet the the person who wrote it. just to see the sick mind responsible for the piece of shit im looking at!

Anti malware Service Executable

Can the cunt who programmed this please witness the random carnage their piece of shit causes on my work desktop ?

Granted it’s windows but seriously…

Why is LinkedIn such a shitty asshat cringe piece of shit stewed with fakeness and boiled with preposterous dramatic assholes trying to be cool and professional but in real life are fucktards.

Fucking HP piece of shit

Hey Visual Studio, WHY THE FUCK DO YOU THINK MY CODE IS SUDDENLY READ ONLY YOU BLOATED PIECE OF SHIT

Just found a book called 'access 2016 advanced'. I can't believe Windows is still trying to push that piece of shit.

Windows file system is a slow piece of shit.

The update regime on most applications for Windows desktop is an unmanageable piece of shit.

Windows Store is a broken piece of shit.

The login process on a Windows computer is a tedious piece of shit.

The Windows Hello authentication is a half-baked piece of shit.

Microsoft MFA is a hostile piece of shit.

Windows Update is a destructive piece of shit.

Windows Defender is a resource-hogging piece of shit.

Windows system fonts are ugly as a piece of shit.

Bootstrap:

Making developers say "fuck it...ill just build it myself" since its inception.

I swear....for small intranet shit sure...whatever y know...but when it comes to actual design this piece of shit is so quirky.

Wow powerbi. Why didn't I think of that?

You fucking piece of shit. You mutherfucking bottle filled with piss. You shit stuck hairy asshole.

Was filling an important form. It required my updated CV. Turned on windows to edit my CV. Turned it off and guess what...
Has been like this for the last half an hour

Snapchat is a piece of shit app. My phone (Moto G5 Plus) is far from spectacular, but ive never used an app that freezes and crashes more than that piece of shit app.

If they'd take Apple's dick out their mouth for a week and work on making the app less shitty for Android, that'd be fucking awesome. Or ya know...stop making some good awful update that looks like shit and fix the fucking app first.

Go suck a dick, CMake. Fucking piece of shit.

Eclipse, you fucking piece of shit

Bought a s8 only to fucking hate it again. FUCKING Bixby i dont fucking need you. FUCK you Samsung. I want Google fucking Assistant you piece of shit.

Bought a new tv. Over £1000 which is probably classed as mid range. However it's still a chunk of money.

It's my first experience with android since 2008.

It's still ABSOLUTELY SHITE!!!

Wish I'd gotten another TV now.

After more than a year I decided to download whisper (app) again and see what was being said near me.

Holly shit the app is a total disappointment, first it crashes my fucking phone the instant I open it, I try to open it again and my God I'm presented with adds everywhere and a load speed so slow a dying tortoise would run circles around it.

The app finished loading the content and it's a clusterfuck of insipid commentary and images, "I bought beautiful new panties", "my lesbian friend doesn't think I'm cute", "any girl want to talk to me?".

After looking at the decaying state of the app I noticed I had notifications, apparently my account is active somehow, I tried to delete it but as it turns out the app has no way of doing that, YOU NEED TO CONTACT THE FUCKERS!

What the fuck?! Who the hell made this steaming pile of shit and said it was an app?!

Nothing more to add, I deleted right away.

It's a Friday and buzzing from refactoring absolute shitty CSS code by reducing it by 2200 lines (and still not complete). Who the Fuck wrote this complete piece of shit!

My fucking pixel XL just broke. Fuck me, fuck this and fuck every fucking thing

I hope I'm not stuck with this broke ass piece of shit I used to use.

Waking up to another day of being forced to use SVN because my university seems to have a problem with using git. Who the fuck uses SVN now anyway, piece of shit version control.

Sometimes for personal projects (and one client gig) I use the same database for local development and production.

Why?

Because I am a piece of shit.

How Google AdSense is a bigger piece of shit than you think...

fuck apple. the overprised piece of shit that is still fucking stuck at 8gb of ram, my 6 year old andriod has 8gb. apple doesnt even fucking let you fix anything. at least with the newest ios they let you change batteries. how the fuck are you supposed to use a macbook with 8gb of ram without destroying the ssd by using swap. their piece of shit unibody anti repair garbage that you cant even change the keyboard in. the m2 chip runs at 120 degrees celcius because if a piece of shit cooling. like you would need a fan spinning at 120 degrees per nanosecond to fucking cool that thing. sometimes it cant even play a youtube video smoothly.

Apache. You. Fucking. Piece. Of. Shit. What. The. Fuck.

LinkedIn's private mode is a useless piece of shit.

Separation of concerns is a beautiful thing.

JSX is fucking ugly. Fuck that shit. I hate JSX with a passion.

Here is one. Did you know that the digestive system works really hard to digest the food eaten?

How about we blend all the food before consuming it? Take a blender and add a cup of coffee, add some salad, add a piece of cake, a few slices of pizza, hot sauce and for good measure add some juice, or whatever-you-eat-for-lunch.

After all, all that food is going to get mixed anyway. This is more efficient!

No? Why not? Because it's ugly, highly unappetizing, disgusting even, and it takes away the pleasure of eating, the enjoyment of a good meal.

That in a nutshell is JSX: mashing up everything together under the pretext of efficiency.

Web development not only is an art, but above all must be enjoyable to those who devote their lives to it. And ugly ain't gonna cut it.

Ok, first rant, about my struggles getting reliable internet over the past 6 years. It's not too interesting of a topic, but here we go:

I'm living in a more rural part of Germany and internet here is shit. I pay more than 50 bucks a month for 700kb/s downstream (let's just not talk about upstream...), which is meh by itself but it gets worse. Before this I had roughly 230kb/s downstream using DSL. My provider came out with a new oh-so-fucking-fancy solution for giving people faster internet without upgrading their lame ass fucking backbone and POS infrastructure from 70 years ago: they sell you hybrid internet which combines your shit DSL and an LTE connection using TCP Multicast. Not only do I get only 6 of my promised (and payed for) 50 Mbit, no, It's also a fucking piece of nonworking shit!!!

Let me illustrate:
You constantly have problems with web content (or any remote content) not loading because the host server does not support TCP Multicast. It either refuses connection altogether or it takes about 30-50 seconds to establish a connection. Think about your live when it takes two or three fucking minutes to load 5 YouTube thumbnails or load new tweets at the bottom of the Twitter page! Also, you never know if you a) have an error in your implementation of a new API or if b) the remote host doesn't support TCPMC (there's never an error for that! Fuck you!), your SSH sessions ALWAYS drop in the most inopportune fucking moments because the LTE thing lost connection, you always have to turn on a VPN if you want to visit specific websites (for example your school's website) and so on....

Oh and also, my provider started throttling specific services again these days with Netflix and YouTube struggling to display 240p, fucking 240p video without buffering when I get 600kbit down on steam (ofc the steam download is paused when watching videos). When using a VPN, YouTube 720p and Netflix HD work like a charm again. Fucking Telekom bastards

Then there is the problem with VPNs. The good thing about them is that they solve all the TCP Multicast problems. Yay. Now for the bad things:
First of all, as soon as I use a VPN, access times to remote go up by like fucking 500%. A fucking DNS lookup takes 8-15 seconds!!! The bandwidth is there but it takes forever.. because reasons I guess. Then the speed drops to DSL speeds after a while because the router turns off my LTE connection when it is unused and it does not detect VPN traffic as traffic (again because... Reasons?) And also, the VPN just dies after an hour and you have to manually reconnect (with every VPN provider so far)

And as if that wasn't enough, now the lan is dying on me, too, with the router (the fucking expensive hybrid piece of shit, 230 bucks..) not providing DHCP service anymore or completely refusing all wifi connections or randomly dropping 5Ghz devices, or.....

You get the point.

The worst thing is, they recently layed down 400mbit fiber in my neighborhood. Guess where the FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT CABLE ENDS??? YEAH, RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY NEIGHBORS HOUSE. STREET NUMBER 19 IS SERVED WITH 400MBIT AND MY HOME, THE 20, IS NOT IN THEIR FUCKING SERVICE REGION. Even though there is a fucking cable with the cable companies name on it on my property, even leading up to my house! They still refuse to acknowledge it! FUCK YOU!!!!

Well anyways thanks for reading. Any of you got the same problems? :/

Fucking Microsoft Edge is becoming a shitty browser. It is a trash. Fucking piece of shit. Hate Microsoft.

I AM GONNA KICK SOMEONE IN THE ASS. SO BAD.

Fuck you YouTube for TV, I can't use the fucking keyboard now... Fucking piece of useless shit...

Search on Windows is annoyingly awful. Like who needs your shitty Bing results before my delayed PC results. This stupid piece of shit gets everything delayed all together!

Node, npm, node-sass - no, the whole JS universe, you fucking piece of shit!

Fuck you royally!

Ionic
React Native
Mobile Angular
Xamarin
Onsen UI
Flutter
jQuery Mobile
Corona SDK
PhoneGap
Intel SDK
Kotlin Mobile...

I'm tired of this piece of shit!
Why are we hitting a nail with chainsaws?
If the hardware/os companies cannot come together to accept a single language, they can all go fuck themselves!!!

If Google hadn't kill Google Play Music, I don't think a single soul would voluntarily switch to it's YouTube Crap Music.
If you remember prior to 2011 the initial plan of Google was to take market away from Apple's iTunes. They initially shipped Amazon music with branded Android OS before the development of Play music.

As a long term user of Play music I'd say "killing the product" was a "bitch move"!
Because Play music is doing really great and you could tell from its reviews and moreover the destination product is quarterly-baked not even a viable replacement in the least sense.
There are more than a million and one problem with YouTube music, currently you would notice your playlist history gets clogged up with your videos when you visit the video web. It's more like the actual YouTube app hiding behind a curtain to mimick a music player. Which is so so stupid and annoying!
As a user all I want from a music player is to fucking listen to music not to watch fucking videos... which makes the app unnecessarily filled with stupid options you never really need.
I understand that monetisation is necessary but please show some fucking courtesy by doing shit with wisdom!

If you wanna think that I'm a bad programmer, that's ok, but I can't put up anymore with Xcode.

Jesus Christ. An entire afternoon spent trying to make an array with two dimensions. I tried every fucking way I found in SO, in the apple site and in every another site that I found in my way.

First: For every example for Swift 3 there's another 10 for Swift <3.

Second: Mutable arrays, as I'm noticing, aren't a thing anymore, so, to declaring array size we go! Except it's impossible to. Tried 3 different ways. Not a single one worked.

Third: Actually, one of the 3 tries worked, for int arrays, and for some obscure reason it won't work for strings, as declaring the array as [String] is too general for swift, I mean, I completely agree with it, a [String] array could contain anything right???? FUCK NO. IT CONTAINS STRINGS YOU FUCKER!!!!

I swear, if the equipment was mine and not from the office, I would have thrown that piece of shit which disconnects from the fucking computer every 30 seconds that apple calls keyboard out of the window already.

Why the fuck do I need to develop for iOS in swift/xcode?? There's so many cross platform alternatives out there, good ones in fact, but no, we must build the applications natively or else the phone will catch on fire according to my boss.

I kinda liked Apple until now.
From now on? Fuck Apple.

Fucking frustrating piece of shit colleges. I’m fucking tired of losing face covering up your assess! Do your fucking job properly you mutherfuckin-piece-of-shit! Fucking full of excuses!! Own what you fucking do!!!

sometimes you just can't deal with that messy piece of shit iptables frontend

<warning>bad words</warning>

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!!! LibreOffice Impress is a complete shit!! I am all about open source and such but this shit just sucks, moving elements around a frame snaps them to some grid, however when you paste an element from other frame it will have a different grid!!! This motherfucker has got an ALT function that will allow you to move the element more precisely but it only works seldom and it hates it when I try to use the fucking arrow keys - it even crashed once when I tried it. AND WHEN YOU FUCKING COPY A TABLE FROM ONE FUCKING FRAME TO ANOTHER MOTHERFUCKING FRAME, DELETE A FEW ROWS AND THEN COPY THE FREAKING TABLE BACK IT WILL HAVE MAGICALLY DIFFERENT DIMENSIONS BUT JUST EVER SO SLIGHTLY, BECAUSE FUCK THE USER, RIGHT??!!! (Doing this because there is no way to split tables into two different objects) I constantly have to save my presentation, kill the process and open it again because something just stops working or gets stuck, like seriously, WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCKING FUCK???!!! Are there no tests?!!! Do the people who work on this piece of motherfucking shit even use it???!!

Apparently the windows 10 anniversary update did "something" to my laptop today.
Keyboard stopped taking input at a random moment a few hours after the update. I shut it down, and it's stuck while shutting down. Pressing the power button has no effect, and the battery is non replaceable (except with a screwdriver and unplugging a cable, which I don't want to do while there is still power running through the system)

Guess I'll just leave it unplugged and hope for the battery to die.
Thanks you Windows 10, thank you Dell P57F002.

I swear, every time I open up this outdated piece of shit. This company needs to update baaaad

Could we all just agree that Mac is a piece of shit in terms of performance? Specially with those lousy animations and that stupid dock?

Got Archlinux running on my Macbook. Happy days again.

I see lots of ranting about bosses or team members.

My boss values me a lot and my team is open to discussing amd value my opinion.

What the fuck to I rant about? fml

One thing that really bothers me is that people use use megabyte to mean mebibyte. What makes it even worse is that Windows does it too. It says it shows gigabyte but actually shows gibibyte.

Now imagined my frustration when I saw this D:

Windows 10 - You unreliable fucking piece of shit excuse for an OS!

The fucking thing smells urgency, I tell ya. And it fails when you need it the most! The worst part is, you can't even open the start menu without letting a whole bunch of background tasks and network fetches from eating your CPU cycles and system memory. I don't need your fucking suggestions for your lame ass apps. I don't want to give you feedback about the "Microsoft experience" (which I'm reconsidering), I don't want to be prompted every 5 seconds to reboot my PC for system updates to take effect. Stop fucking with my productivity!

FUUUUUCCCCCKKKKK!!!!!!!

I hope my peers will stop using fukin' snapchat because its such a piece of poorly optimized shit (POPOS) on Android.

You fucking piece of shit, how do I get you to work, I literally installed all libraries, 7-zip, everything, fucking work already

Fucking garbage piece of shit microsoft httpclient

identical request works in node!

identical request works in postman!

but noooooooo httpclient, you have to add the content length on the content itself, can't add authorization header except through special way, serialization is wrong bunch of shit pile of shit no working shit

Why the FUCK does Safari suck so much at implementing things that already WORK on every fucking browser except that apple piece of shit?

Fuck heroku, fuck precompiling assets, fuck the assets pipeline, fuck fuck fuck fucking piece of shit

Doing it manually, is less stressful and much quicker. It cant be that hard to add something to a calendar. You fucking worthless piece of shit Siri.

Updating angular and npm/node/whatever the fuck is the most difficult and convoluted thing ever

Web devs, you deserve better than this awful piece of shit cable mess of a fucking "framework" or whatever the fuck this retarded shit is meant to be

Fuck all you piece of shit js frameworks. Not js! Just the frameworks

Oh dear Senior Developer, you incompetent piece of shit

What the fuck is a framework? I have never hated a term this much, overused piece of shit word.

3 hours of work lost because the Silverlight Lightswitch project randomly decided to shit itself and corrupts it's generated datasource. Twice.

Go fuck yourself you obsolete piece of shit.

The struggle with installing opencv is fucking real!
FUCK YOU PIECE OF A SHIT

Renaming a file is just too difficult for this piece of shit software.

Fixing bugs? Fuck no.

Fixing crashes? Fuck no.

Fixing the unnavigable IDE settings? Fuck no.

The IntelliJ platform is a bloated piece of shit at every level.

JetBrains cannot produce software that isn't held together by duct tape.

I can't name a single item of software they've ever produced that isn't a bloated piece of shit.

Even if you are prepared to waste a lot of time trying to file a bug report – which they usually just ignore or pretend not to be reproducible – you have to use another in-house heap of shit called YouTrack.

Have you tried using this piece of trash that masquerades as a bug tracker?

These people are fucking clinically insane.

While your IDE becomes unresponsive and crashes without warning, or your keyboard shortcuts just mysteriously stop working in the IDE, or indexing just stops working for no reason, why not check out their TikTok and Twitter accounts?

They've got an excellent PR team that knows how to polish a turd for public consumption, and to make money out of it.

I'm going to change database structure for the 5th time now. Thank you documentation, you useless piece of shit.

For windows: Sublime
For linux tty: Vim

VSCode is a bloated piece of shit which can't open a folder without rebooting the whole window. It's only nice next to the rest of the bloated shit out there.

Usually I use my laptop which has ubuntu installed but sometimes if I'm doing something for long period of time I use my desktop which has windows 7 installed. You know for games and shit.
Here is the bad part about all of this
*Rant incoming*

This fucking piece of shit ass licker. Deleted my entire god damn paths.
And if you don't know if you don't have the right paths you can't do shit basically. This fucking piece of smelly shit. DELETED THEM FUUUUUCJDUCKFUUUCKKKKFUUUUUCK NOW I HAVE TO WRITE ALL OF THEM AGAIN ?! FUCK YOU FUUUUUUCKKK GO SUCK A BIG DICK FOR MAKING A FUCKING SYSTEM MECHANIC THIS FUCKING FRAGILE. WHAT THE FUUUUCK AND ITS SO HARD TO FUCKING GET THE PATHS RIGHT TOO. SHITSHISHIT AND I CAN FORMAT TO A NEW OS BUT IF ITS WINDOWS I NEED TO INSTALL EVERY DAMN BIT OF DRIVER AGAIN FUUUUUCK THIS MOTHER FUCKING SHIT
linux i'm sorry I was cheating on you with that piece of shit cheap whore. You are the right one for me. Even though If I need to work hours to make a software work on you l, when you work you work for good, not like this piece of shit that decides to delete important information out of nowhere.

Biggest aha! moment was when i understood rust's borrowing and how much of a retarded piece of shit it was and then went back to scala yesterday

Ok. FUCK THIS SHIT.

It's been like literally 15 minutes and I've been struggling, trying to *do* something at all.

I don't know why or how my experience with firefox has just plumetted through the floor. I partially blamed my slow ass HDD but guess what, chrome ran beautifully last I checked.

Admit, I am. Going to have to hate wordpress less, it's still a steaming pile if shit, but that massively global piece of shit forced facebook to relicence.

Mythbusters proof has been reproved, you can Polish shit.

I absolutely fucking hate Xcode, the pile of shit ide. Even when I set the default ide for Java files it STILL FUCKING OPENS XCODE FFS.

Cocoapods - an easy way TO SHIT ALL OVER YOUR MAC AND PROJECTS. Jut add frameworks to project? No way, lets put hundreds of shit, projects in projects, run all over the place some piece of shit scripts written by who knows who and for what reason, it's always fun when one little misstep can ruin all your plans for weekend.

When a client said, ofc you can add this feature all you have to do is to press two buttons!! Oh really??? Come and press them your self if it's too easy for you and I will pay you!!! You little piece of shit!!!!

Fucking Java 8 java.time package. I want to kill the damn developers of this useless piece of shit code.

pip

A piece of shit compared to what other languages have.

Howdy, guess who's back motherfuckers?

Which one of you developed this utter piece of shit called Optimizely/EpiServer? We need to talk.

I've now spent 4 hours trying to understand this piece of shit stored procedure.
3475 lines of pure shit with 3 levels down nested sub-selects.
FML!

I really hate Android Studio that overrated piece of shit

Who the fuck uses App Library on their iPhone? Redundant piece of shit.

So after multiple hours of wrestling with Jira I finally managed to autofill fields in the service desk. How? By installing a plugin to show message boxes and injecting JavaScript through it, what else?

Fucking wonderful piece of crap :)

Next up: automatically capture errors triggered by employees with Sentry and raise Jira requests. "A button didn't work" isn't enough god damn it.

MS outlook is a piece of shit!! i can never find contacts in the address book, it to the first 10 contacts! you have to know their exact name sometimes. what a fucking piece of shit. this is just one of many complaints i have on it.

AHHHHHHHH

Why did people upgrade to windows 10 its such a piece of shit, sticking to windows 7 then if i feel like i need to on linux it is.

I hate working with micro services

Fucking over complicated piece of shit

I'm just a piece of carbon dumping all the money away that was earned by hard work by my parents and other elders of the family....

Help me
I'm dying (well everyone is... but I'm a piece of shit)

I've a question. Has anyone in here ever be forced to use something as remotely frustrating as SQL Server Reporting Services (ssrs)? I swear it is one of the most convoluted piece of shit ever.

Oh, Ubisoft

Relying on your UShit cloud saves was a terrible mistake

20 hours of AC Origins and 9 hours of Far Cry 5 lost because I trusted your piece of shit service would do something right

What a fucking piece of shit is WIX?

It's even worse than WordPress.

Lotus notes is a pathetic piece of shit, slow and buggy, and I am being forced to use that at work

Fucking apple... Just fucking apple... And their piece of shit frameworks... Stochastic, unpredictable, unreliable, clusterfuck pieces of shit!

algolia.com is a piece of fucking shit, trying to use the search on the reasonml forms just pisses me off and makes me want to punch a baby in the face!!!

React-native should go kill itself. Fucking piece of shit.

fuck apache kafka this worthless piece of shit never fucking works >:(

Screw OpenAI gym!

This piece of shit, frozen lake, doesn't even work properly!

Gaaàaaaæaaáaaãaaaaâaaåaaäaāaaah!