During a random school project.

Me: *Explains why team members idea is bad*

Team member: *Im going to do it like this anyways.*

Me: *add explaination of why idea is bad to git commit log.*

1 week later: some parts of the project dont work like they are suppost to.

Team member: *dude can you help me bla bla....(encounters issue i mentioned regarding his idea)*

Me: *no, i've already got too much on my plate. please, sort it out yourself....*

At the presentation

Teacher: *ask question about problem*

Team member: *tries to blame the problem on me....*

Me: *shows git commit log to teacher*

Me: *passing grade*

Team member: *failing grade*

Justice served.

They said I needed to keep my commit messages "PG13".

What they failed to realize is every PG13 movie is allowed 1 instance of "fuck".

Its Friday, you all know what that means! ... Its results day for practiseSafeHex's most incompetent co-worker!!!

*audience: wwwwwwooooooooo!!!!*

We've had a bewildering array of candidates, lets remind ourselves:

- a psychopath that genuinely scared me a little
- a CEO I would take pleasure seeing in pain
- a pothead who mistook me for his drug dealer
- an unbelievable idiot
- an arrogant idiot obsessed with strings

Tough competition, but there can be only one ... *drum roll* ... the winner is ... none of them!

*audience: GASP!*
*audience member: what?*
*audience member: no way!*
*audience member: your fucking kidding me!*

Sir calm down! this is a day time show, no need for that ... let me explain, there is a winner ... but we've kept him till last and for a good reason

*audience: ooooohhhhh*

You see our final contestant and ultimate winner of this series is our good old friend "C", taking the letters of each of our previous contestants, that spells TRAGIC which is the only word to explain C.

*audience: laughs*

Oh I assure you its no laughing matter. C was with us for 6 whole months ... 6 excruciatingly painful months.

Backstory:

We needed someone with frontend, backend and experience with IoT devices, or raspberry PI's. We didn't think we'd get it all, but in walked an interviewee with web development experience, a tiny bit of Angular and his masters project was building a robot device that would change LED's depending on your facial expressions. PERFECT!!!

... oh to have a time machine

Working with C:

- He never actually did the tutorials I first set him on for Node.js and Angular 2+ because they were "too boring". I didn't find this out until some time later.

- The first project I had him work on was a small dashboard and backend, but he decided to use Angular 1 and a different database than what we were using because "for me, these are easier".

- He called that project done without testing / deploying it in the cloud, despite that being part of the ticket, because he didn't know how. Rather than tell or ask anyone ... he just didn't do it and moved on.

- As part of his first tech review I had to explain to him why he should be using if / else, rather than just if's.

- Despite his past experience building server applications and dashboards (4 years!), he never heard of a websocket, and it took a considerable amount of time to explain.

- When he used a node module to open a server socket, he sat staring at me like a deer caught in headlights completely unaware of how to use / test it was working. I again had to explain it and ultimately test it for him with a command line client.

- He didn't understand the need to leave logging inside an application to report errors. Because he used to ... I shit you not ... drive to his customers, plug into their server and debug their application using a debugger.

... props for using a debugger, but fuck me.

- Once, after an entire 2 days of tapping me on the shoulder every 15 mins for questions / issues, I had to stop and ask:

Me: "Have you googled it?"
C: "... eh, no"
Me: "can I ask why?"
C: "well, for me, I only google for something I don't know"
Me: "... well do you know what this error message means?"
C: "ah good point, i'll try this time"

... maybe he was A's stoner buddy?

- He burned through our free cloud usage allowance for a month, after 1 day, meaning he couldn't test anything else under his account. He left an application running, broadcasting a lot of data. Turns out the on / off button on the dashboard only worked for "on". He had been killing his terminal locally and didn't know how to "ctrl + c a cloud app" ... so left it running. His intention was to restart the app every time you are done using it ... but forgot.

- His issue with the previous one ... not any of his countless mistakes, not the lack of even trying to make the button work, no, no, not for C. C's issue is the cloud is "shit" for giving us such little allowances. (for the record in a month I had never used more than 5%).

- I had to explain environment variables and why they are necessary for passwords and tokens etc. He didn't know it wasn't ok to commit these into GitHub.

- At his project meetups with partners I had to repeatedly ask him to stop googling gifs and pay attention to the talks.

- He complained that we don't have 3 hour lunch breaks like his last place.

- He once copied and pasted the same function 450 times into a file as a load test ... are loops too mainstream nowadays?

You see C is our winner, because after 6 painful months (companies internal process / requirements) he actually achieved nothing. I really mean that, nothing. Every thing was so broken, so insecure / wide open, built without any kind of common sense or standards I had to delete it all and start again ... it took me 2 weeks.

I hope you've all enjoyed this series and will join me in praying for the return of my sanity ... I do miss it a lot.

Yours truly,
practiseSafeHex

When you stare into git, git stares back.

It's fucking infinite.

Me 2 years ago:
"uh was it git fetch or git pull?"

Me 1 year ago:
"Look, I printed these 5 git commands on a laptop sticker, this is all I need for my workflow! branch, pull, commit, merge, push! Git is easy!"

Me now:
"Hold my beer, I'll just do git format-patch -k --stdout HEAD..feature -- script.js | git am -3 -k to steal that file from your branch, then git rebase master && git rebase -i HEAD~$(git rev-list --count master..HEAD) to clean up the commit messages, and a git branch --merged | grep -v "\*" | xargs -n 1 git branch -d to clean up the branches, oh lets see how many words you've added with git diff --word-diff=porcelain | grep -e '^+[^+]' | wc -w, hmm maybe I should alias some of this stuff..."

Do you have any git tricks/favorites which you use so often that you've aliased them?

I always forget to commit my changes and then when someone reminds me, I usually commit 1 weeks work in one single commit.

!rant

New job (first CS job).

Day 1: Install Ubuntu
Day 2: Dev said "it was so cute when he asked if he could uninstall windows." Also, first pair programming with engineer of 12 years. First commit (he did all the work, I just tried keeping up."
Day 3: "Here, try this bug " nearly get there. Have to leave early. Team event (Group VR experience, was wicked fun with drinks afterwards. Turns out boss man is a total bad ass. Swam with sharks and giant Wales)
Day 4: Fix bug. Notice odd behaviour. Fix that too. (All on my own). Code review: "This, that but works and is good." Get asked if I want to go to customer to do A, B and C. Tell Boss I only know B. He said "Tell me what you need for A and C."

I'm so God damn happy.

1. Humans perform best if they have ownership over a slice of responsibility. Find roles and positions within the company which give you energy. Being "just another intern/junior" is unacceptable, you must strive to be head of photography, chief of data security, master of updating packages, whatever makes you want to jump out of bed in the morning. Management has only one metric to perform on, only one right to exist: Coaching people to find their optimal role. Productivity and growth will inevitably emerge if you do what you love. — Boss at current company

2. Don't jump to the newest technology just because it's popular or shiny. Don't cling to old technology just because it's proven. — Team lead at the Arianespace contractor I worked for.

4. "Developing a product you wouldn't like to use as an end user, is unsustainable. You can try to convince yourself and others that cancer is great for weight loss, but you're still gonna die if you don't try to cure it. You can keep ignoring the disease here to fill your wallet for a while, but it's worse for your health than smoking a pack of cigs a day." — my team supervisor, heavy smoker, and possibly the only sane person at Microsoft.

5. Never trust documentation, never trust comments, never trust untested code, never trust tests, never trust commit messages, never trust bug reports, never trust numbered lists or graphs without clearly labeled axes. You never know what is missing from them, what was redacted away. — Coworker at current company.

Feels so good...
1 day = 1 commit

Boss: I was looking over our expenses and was wondering why you are ordering a new piece of equipment?
Me: (I stand up & address my fellow code-drones) Can everybody save everything right now please. Good? Now newGuy commit your changes.
(Audible typing followed by the entire room groaning.)
Me: He just deleted everything...again and I am running out of backup storage.
Boss: ........So you want 1 of those things or 2?

Share your most useful terminal aliases and functions.

alias gs='git status'
alias gcm='git commit -m'
alias push='git push'
alias pull='git pull'
alias hosts='sudo nano /etc/hosts'
alias glog='git log --graph --oneline --decorate -n 10 --color'
alias mykey='cat ~/.ssh/id_rsa.pub | xclip -sel clip'

function mkcd () {
mkdir -p -- "$1" && cd -P -- "$1"
}

As well as one for each major project (lets say 1+ weeks of dev time) to immediately cd to it from anywhere. How about you guys?

Always looking to improve my terminal commands, so am curious what everyone else uses for shortcuts.

Group Project
1.Make a slack Channel.
2.Make a private repo
3.Give everyone access to do anything.
4. Wait for people to talk and commit code.
5...............R.I.P

My whole team was a circus:
- Dev 1, the senior: he will be spent his days coding his personal projects and will convince management that everyone else needed to prove themselves so he will have nothing to do and we will do all the work.
- Dev 2, the junior: he was convinced that his mission in life was to be friends with his team. He's desk was far from the rest of the team so he will show just right after lunch EVERY FREAKING DAY with a list on his phone of random things he wanted to talk about like music, artists, art, news, etc., he really thought I didn't notice the list.
- Dev 3: the vegan: you will hear on every chance how she was so awesome for being vegan.
- Dev 4, the expert: if you ask him anything he will stare at you in silence to make you feel like you are a stupid for not knowing the answer and then turn around like nothing.
- Dev 5, the ghost: he will show early every day, code without mouthing a word and leave at 5pm, I think I heard him saying "hmmm" once but I might be wrong.
- Dev 6, the coder by accident: he was a graphic designer and ended up doing front end so he hated his job.
- Dev 7, me: the one who didn't care about anything but doing his job and leave.
- The project manager: she didn't knew anything about technology but will attend meetings with clients on her own, commit to deadlines and then inform us that the project that we estimated for 8 weeks will have to be done in 2 with new additions to the features.

You know the drill, here's your potato :/

PineScript is absolute garbage.

It's TradingView's scripting language. It works, but it's worse than any language I have ever seen for shoddy parsing. Its naming conventions are pretty terrible, too:

transparency? no, "transp"
sum? no, cum. seriously. cum(array) is its "cumulative sum."

There are other terrible names, but the parser is what really pisses me off.

1) If you break up a long line for readability (e.g. a chained ternary), each fragment needs to be indented by more than its parent... but never by a multiple of 4 spaces because then it isn't a fragment anymore, but its own statement.

2) line fragments also cannot end in comments because comments are considered to be separate lines.

3) Lambdas can only be global. They're just fancy function declarations. Someone really liked the "blah(x,y,z) =>" syntax

4) blocks to `if`s must be on separate lines, meaning `if (x) y:=z` is illegal. And no, there are no curly braces, only whitespace.

There are plenty more, but the one that really got me furious is:

98) You cannot call `plot()`, `plotshape()`, etc. if they're indented! So if you're using non-trivial logic to optionally plot things like indicators, fuck you.

Whoever wrote this language and/or parser needs to commit seppuku.

Never have I been so furious whilst at work as yesterday, I am still super pissed about going back today but knowing it's only for another few weeks makes it baerable.

I have been the lead developer on a project for the last 3~ months and our CTO is the product owner. So every now and then he decides to just work on a feature he is interested in- fair enough I guess. But everything I have to go and clean up his horrendous code. Everything he writes is an absolute joke, it's like he is constantly in Hackathon mode "let's just copy and paste some code here, hardcoded shit there and forgot about separation of code- it all goes in 1 file".

So yesterday he added a application to the project and instead of reusing a shared data access layer he added an entirely new ORM, which is near identical to the existing ORM in use, for this one application.

Being anal about these things, the first thing I did was delete his shit and simply reference the shared library then refactor a little code to make it compatible.

WELL!! I certainly hit a nerve, he went crazy spamming messages on Slack demanding I revert as it broke ONE SINGLE QUERY that he hadn't checked in (he does 1 huge commit for 10 of everyone else's). I stuck to my principals and explained both ORM's are similar and that we only needed one, the second would cause a fragmented codebase for no benefit whatsoever.

The lead Dev was then forced to come and convince me to revert, again I refused and called out the shit quality of their code. The battle raged on via the public slack group and I could hear colleagues enjoying the heated debate, new users even started joining the group just to get in on mine and the cto's difference of opinion.

I even offered to fix his code for him if he were to commit it, obviously that was not taken well ;).

Once I finally got a luck at the cluster fuck of shit he had written it took me around 5 minutes to fix and I ever improved performance. Regardless he was having none of it. Still the demands to revert continued.

I left the office steaming after long discussions with the lead Dev caught in the middle.

Fortunately my day was salvages with a positive technical discussion that evening at a company with whome I had a job offer from.

I really hate burning bridges and have never left a company under bad terms but this dictator is making me look forward to breaking the news today I will be gone in 4 weeks.

8:50am aight alarm clock, give me 5 more minutes

8:55am ok lets round it to 9, wake me up then

9:00am aight enough. lets just sleep for 1 more minute since 9:00 is too round

9:43am fuck

9:44am ok its time to finally study for the upcoming college exam

9:45am nothing but a fresh day to start studying for college

9:46am eh i dont have a lot to study so I'll do it in 2pm, I'll code my project instead

2pm hold on 5 more minutes until i finish coding this feature and then I'll study

5pm where the fuck is this bug coming from

5:504pm goddamn i found it

6:36pm holy shit its already over 6pm, I'll study at night

7:42pm ok its night now, time to study but I'll do it when i fix all bugs

8:14pm ok bugs fixed, commit. lets study

8:15pm you know what, im way too tired and exhausted from this coding, I'll take a short 30 minute break and then I'll study

10:15pm ok im feeling fresh bois lets study now theres not too much

1:31am damn this movie was good

1:32am fuck i forgot to study, I'll do it tomorrow

2:10am *posts this rant*

Dev: Your PR only addresses a quarter of the ticket

Dev2: *limps a commit so that now 1/2 of the ticket is addressed and creates a new PR for a separate ticket*

Dev: Your original PR only addresses half of the ticket

Dev2: *limps a commit so that now 3/4 of the ticket is addressed and creates a new PR for ANOTHER new ticket*

Dev: Your original PR only addresses 3/4 of the ticket

Dev2: *limps a commit so that now all of the ticket is addressed but two new bugs are introduced and creates a new PR for ANOTHER new ticket*

Dev: Your original PR introduces 2 new bugs

Dev2: *limps a commit addressing one of the two new bugs and creates a new PR for ANOTHER new ticket*

Dev: Your original PR still has one bu—

Manager: WOW GOOD JOB DEV2 THAT’S 5 PRs TODAY AMAZING! Dev you need to pickup the pace, you only have 2 PRs so far today. And get these PRs from Dev2 QA’d fast. He’s a rockstar!

Dev: …

*The 4 other PRs turned out to be equally dogshit*

Manager: Hey hurry up with QA, you’re holding Dev2 back!

Dev: …

3 Easy step to learn and use git :
1. git commit
2. git push
3. git gud

Since you're here, let's make something very clear.
There are four kinds of people in this world:
1. Idiot fucks who commit everytime they write a single loc
2. Professional programmers who commit when they complete a module/functionality
3. Lost souls who commit to their girlfriends
4. People who don't use git.
Understand?

Bad dev practices:

1. Forgetting to version control some fun project i am doing for a long time and then commit everything at once. And forget about it again..

2. I probably have too much love for abstraction. So i abstract stuff just for the fuck of it to the point my friends dont even understand what the program is for.

3. I have no patience and due to that i lose motivation when i think of some idea that is big.

4. I cant keep my ideas small enough, and i dream too big until problem3 kicks in, and then i drop the entire idea.

Online tutorial pet peeves
————————————

My top 10 points of unsolicited ranting/advice to those making video tutorials:

1. Avoid lots of pauses, saying “umm” too much, or other unnecessary redundancy in speech (listen to yourself in a recording)

2. If I can’t understand you at 1.5 - 2x playback speed and you don’t already speak relatively quickly and clearly, I’m probably not going to watch for long (mumbling, inconsistent microphone volume, and background noise/music are frequent culprits)

3. It’s ok to make mistakes in a tutorial, so long as you also fix them in the tutorial (e.g., the code that is missing a semicolon that all of a sudden has one after it compiles correctly — but no mention of fixing it or the compiler error that would have been received the first time). With that said, it’s fine to fix mistakes pertinent to the topic being taught, but don’t make me watch you troubleshoot your non-relevant computer issues or problems created by your specific preferences (e.g., IDE functionality not working as expected when no specific IDE was prescribed for the tutorial)

4. Don’t make me wait on your slow computer to do something in silence—either teach me something while it’s working or edit the video to remove the lull

5. You knew you were recording your screen. Close your email, chat, and other applications that create notifications before recording. Or at least please don’t check them and respond while recording and not edit it out of the video

6. Stay on topic. I’m watching your video to learn about something specific. A little personality is good, but excessive tangents are often a waste of my time

7. [Specific to YouTube] Don’t block my view of important content with annotations (and ads, if within your control)

8. If you aren’t uploading quality HD recordings, enlarge your font! Don’t make me have to guess what character you typed

9. Have a game plan (i.e., objectives) before hitting the record button

10. Remember that it’s easier to rant and complain than to do something constructive. Thank you for spending your time making tutorial videos. It’s better for you to make videos and commit all my pet peeves listed above than to not make videos at all—don’t let one guy’s rant stop you from sharing your knowledge and experience (but if it helps you, you’re welcome—and you just might gain a new viewer!)

Be me, new dev on a team. Taking a look through source code to get up to speed.

Dev: **thinking to self** why is there no package lock.. let me bring this up to boss man

Dev: hey boss man, you’ve got no package lock, did we forget to commit it?

Manager: no I don’t like package locks.

Dev: ...why?

Manager: they fuck up computer. The project never ran with a package lock.

Dev: ..how will you make sure that every dev has the same packages while developing?

Manager: don’t worry, I’ve done this before, we haven’t had any issues.

**couple weeks goes by**

Dev: pushes code

Manager: hey your feature is not working on my machine

Dev: it’s working on mine, and the dev servers. Let’s take a look and see

**finds out he deletes his package lock every time he does npm install, so therefore he literally has the latest of like a 50 packages with no testing**

Dev: well you see you have some packages here that updates, and have broken some of the features.

Manager: >=|, fix it.

Dev: commit a working package lock so we’re all on the same.

Manager: just set the package version to whatever works.

Dev: okay

**more weeks go by**

Manager: why are we having so many issues between devs, why are things working on some computers and not others??? We can’t be having this it’s wasting time.

Dev: **takes a look at everyone’s packages** we all have different packages.

Manager: that’s it, no one can use Mac computers. You must use these windows computers, and you must install npm v6.0 and node v15.11. Everyone must have the same system and software install to guarantee we’re all on the same page

Dev: so can we also commit package lock so we’re all having the same packages as well?

Manager: No, package locks don’t work.

**few days go by**

Manager: GUYS WHY IS THE CODE DEPLOYING TO PRODUCTION NOT WORKING. IT WAS WORKING IN DEV

DEV: **looks at packages**, when the project was built on dev on 9/1 package x was on version 1.1, when it was approved and moved to prod on 9/3 package x was now on version 1.2 which was a change that broke our code.

Manager: CHANGE THE DEPLOYMENT SCRIPTS THEN. MAKE PROD RSYNC NODE_MODULES WITH DEV

Dev: okay

Manager: just trust me, I’ve been doing this for years

Who the fuck put this man in charge.

(last commit to readme.md 1 year ago)

- initial commit

git commit -m "last"
git commit -m "last1"
git commit -m "real last"
git commit -m "real last 1"
git commit -m "real real last"

whenever my team starts on a new project we're all like "okay we're gonna have MEANINGFUL commit messages this time guys"

*5 hours later*

$ git commit -m "go fuck yourself"
[master a7b9de] go fuck yourself
1 file changed, 1 insertion(+), 0 deletions(-)

One time a former colleague reformatted all the code because he was very strict on code conventions.. so.

If (1==1)
{

Instead of

If (1==1) {

After some discussion on why he should never do this I denied him the rights to commit any longer..

Also..

One time a user requested a feature.. he wanted a drop down with some values without specifying where he wanted it. To our best knowledge we put it somewhere where we thought it would be usefull.. for instance when it is a car model drop down ypu expect it to be somewhere near a car screen right.. little did we know that he didnt have any rights to acces that screen at all hhahaha.. after that he came yelling in our room telling us to think for him.. in not so light words I told him that he should write his stories properly and that if he creates crappy stories he leaves me with a lot of freedom of interpretation of his stories so stop crying and get the fuck out of my room..

Its not that I get angry easily but I cant handle dumb people that do dumb stuff around me..

1. Refactor shitty code because it is hard to maintain
2. Rant about how can someone write a code like that
3. Check commit log to see who is the person to blame
4. Found out that's me

Always answer these 2 questions in your commit message: (1) what will happen if this commit applied? (2) why this change is being made?

1. My senior told me that my code is crashing.

2. I check the code and told him that it is not my doing. As there was lots of nested if-else as I prefer to keep a variable and update it in if conditions. Like a filters rather than trees with branches. What I say, I knew my coding style.

3. Then he show me my git commit and I am having existential crises.

Am I missing days? How can I? I mean was I abducted and in mean time some alien took my place and they placed this memory of me coding?

Ah! man I think I am possessed by some inexperienced developer. I seriously need some fucked up crash to exorcise him.

When migrating from MySQL server to MariaDB and having a query start returning a completely different result set then what was expected purely because MariaDB corrected a bug with sub selects being sorted.

It took several days to identify all that was needed on that sub select was “limit 1” to get that thing to return the correct data, felt like an idiot for only having to do 7 character commit 😆

This is something that happened 2 years ago.

1st year at uni, comp sci.

Already got project to make some app for the univ that runs in android, along with the server

I thought, omg, this is awesome! First year and already got something to offer for the university 😅
(it's a new university, at the time I was the 2nd batch)

Team of 12, we know our stuffs, from the programming POV, at least, but we know nothing about dealing with client.

We got a decent pay, we got our computers upgraded for free, and we even got phones of different screen sizes to test out our apps on.

No user requirement, just 2-3 meetings. We were very naive back then.

2 weeks into development, Project manager issues requirement changes

we have a meeting again, discussing the important detail regarding the business model. Apparently even the univ side hadn't figure it out.

1 month in the development, the project manager left to middle east to pursue doctoral degree

we were left with "just do what you want, as long as it works"

Our projects are due to be done in 3 months. We had issues with the payment, we don't get paid until after everything's done. Yet the worse thing is, we complied.

Month 3, turns out we need to present our app to some other guy in the management who apparently owns all the money. He's pleased, but yet, issued some more changes. We didn't even know that we needed to make dashboard at that time.

The project was extended by one month. We did all the things required, but only got the payment for 3 months.

Couldn't really ask for the payment of the fourth month since apparently now the univ is having some 'financial issues'.

And above all: Our program weren't even tested, let alone being used, since they haven't even 'upgraded' the university such that people would need to use our program as previously planned.

Well, there's nothing to be done right now, but at least I've learned some REALLY valuable lesson:

1. User Requirement is a MUST! Have them sign it afterwards, and never do any work until then. This way, change of requirements could be rejected, or at least postponed

2. Code convention is a MUST! We have our code, in the end, written in English and Indonesian, which causes confusion. Furthermore, some settle to underscore when naming things, while other chooses camel case.

3. Don't give everyone write access to repository. Have them pull their own, and make PR later on. At least this way, they are forced to fix their changes when it doesn't meet the code convention.

4. Yell at EVERYONE who use cryptic git commit message. Some of my team uses JUST EMOTICONS for the commit message. At this point, even "fixes stuffs" sound better.

Well, that's for my rant. Thanks for reading through it. I wish some of you could actually benefit from it, especially if you're about to take on your first project.

Starting a third year computer science course. Lesson 1 of web API production. Git. Lecturer tells us to do a different branch for every commit so it's easy to roll back.

Nice.

As much as I love opensource I hate really hate some of its actvie community members (read this as "freetards" <-- see urbandictonary). As a .Net + web devloper with minimal C experience (I just started learning it) and literally no Python experience its not really easy to contribute for me to many (most) opensource software for linux. I am using some <unnamed software> and I found a <critical bug>, it was easy to reproduce and I wrote for list of possible solutions, found it in a code and linked and basically wrote a docummentation longer than any other I ever wrote for every single project I did ever, combined. This <software> was critical for my server and since owner of github repo and few other people there were really active, I hoped that this bug with pretty good documentation will be solved fast, I went to my bed with a heroic feeling of an open source community contributor that helped saving world. I was horribly wrong. Tomorrow, I got 3 passively agressive responses from owner and other 2 freetards that summed up said <other1>:"oh thats nice, fix i yourself and commit it", <other2>:"have a sex with yourself" in a nice way, and <owner>: "fix my softwate and create mrege request". After replying that I have no experience my Python skills are not on a level requied for such an action, he messaged me on twitter I have linked to my GitHub profile saying even less nicely that I am a "retarded c*nt" and that I should learn Python and fix it myself. This makes me stay with my Windows based Server for some time now, fuck this. I googled his github nickname and guess what. Our main freetard is admin on an <unnamed linux forum> and mebmber of many other "computer help" with literally half of his posts just slightly toxic posts about how everyone should use linux and how supreme it is ober anything other, the other hals was crying why linux has only 1% of market share. Oh boi I am not sure why but ITS MAYBE BECAUSE OF FREETARDS LIKE YOU.
And the funnies thing is, hes not only freetard, he is just fullstack retard. One of his posts is "helping" to some <noob windows user> installing Linux. tl:dr for this las part: Freetard basically wiped all data of that <noob>.

PS: Bless everyone who do not respond "oh nice, now you can do it yourself"

To my friends in Ireland, stay safe tomorrow, it's probably going to be nasty storm. Good luck and
1. Git commit
2. git push
3. git out

git commit -m "Forgot a semicolon"

[master 92asd32] Forgot a semicolon
1 file changed, 1 insertion(+), 1 deletion(-)

So I'm back from vacation! It's my first day back, and I'm feeling refreshed and chipper, and motivated to get a bunch of things done quickly so I can slack off a bit later. It's a great plan.

First up: I need to finish up tiny thing from my previous ticket -- I had overlooked it in the description before. (I couldn't test this feature [push notifications] locally so I left it to QA to test while I was gone.)

It amounted to changing how we pull a due date out of the DB; some merchants use X, a couple use Y. Instead of hardcoding them, it would use a setting that admins can update on the fly.

Several methods deep, the current due date gets pulled indirectly from another class, so it's non-trivial to update; I start working through it.

But wait, if we're displaying a due date that differs from the date we're actually using internally, that's legit bad. So I investigate if I need to update the internals, too.

After awhile, I start to make lunch. I ask my boss if it's display-only (best case) and... no response. More investigating.

I start to make a late lunch. A wild sickness appears! Rush to bathroom; lose two turns.

I come back and get distracted by more investigating. I start to make an early dinner... and end up making dinner for my monster instead.

Boss responds, tells me it's just for display (yay!) and that we should use <macro resource feature> instead.

I talk to Mr. Product about which macros I should add; he doesn't respond.

I go back to making lunch-turn-dinner for myself; monster comes back and he's still hungry (as he never asks for more), so I make him dinner.

I check Slack again; Mr. Product still hasn't responded. I go back to making dinner.

Most of the way through cooking, I get a notification! Product says he's talking it through with my boss, who will update me on it. Okay fine. I finish making dinner and go eat.

No response from boss; I start looking through my next ticket.

No response from boss. I ping him and ask for an update, and he says "What are you talking about?" Apparently product never talked to bossmang =/ I ask him about the resources, and he says there's no need to create any more as the one I need already exists! Yay!

So my feature went from a large, complex refactor all the way down to a -1+2 diff. That's freaking amazing, and it only took the entire day!

I run the related specs, which take forever, then commit and push.

Push rejected; pull first! Fair, I have been gone for two weeks. I pull, and git complains about my .gitignore and some local changes. fine, whatever. Except I forgot I had my .gitignore ignored (skipped worktree). Finally figure that out, clean up my tree, and merge.

Time to run the specs again! Gems are out of date. Okay, I go run `bundle install` and ... Ruby is no longer installed? Turns out one of the changes was an upgrade to Ruby 2.5.8.

Alright, I run `rvm use ruby-2.5.8` and.... rvm: command not found. What. I inspect the errors from before and... ah! Someone's brain fell out and they installed rbenv instead of the expected rvm on my mac. Fine, time to figure it out. `rbenv which ruby`; error. `rbenv install --list`; skyscraper-long list that contains bloody everything EXCEPT 2.5.8! Literally 2.5 through 2.5.7 and then 2.6.0-dev. asjdfklasdjf

Then I remember before I left people on Slack made a big deal about upgrading Ruby, so I go looking. Dummy me forgot about the search feature for a painful ten minutes. :( Search found the upgrade instructions right away, ofc. I follow them, and... each step takes freaking forever. Meanwhile my children are having a yelling duet in the immediate background, punctuated with screams and banging toys on furniture.

Eventually (seriously like twenty-five minutes later) I make it through the list. I cd into my project directory and... I get an error message and I'm not in the project directory? what. Oh, it's a zsh thing. k, I work around that, and try to run my specs. Fail.

I need to update my gems; k. `bundle install` and... twenty minutes later... all done.

I go to run my specs and... RubyMine reports I'm using 2.5.4 instead of 2.5.8? That can't be right. `ruby --version` reports 2.5.8; `rbenv version` reports 2.5.8? Fuck it, I've fought with this long enough. Restarting fixes everything, right? So I restart. when my mac comes back to life, I try again; same issue. After fighting for another ten minutes, I find a version toggle in RubyMine's settings, and update it to 2.5.8. It indexes for five minutes. ugh.

Also! After the restart, this company-installed surveillance "security" runs and lags my computer to hell. Highest spec MacBook Pro and it takes 2-5 seconds just to switch between desktops!

I run specs again. Hey look! Missing dependency: no execjs. I can't run the specs.

Fuck. This. I'll just push and let the CI run specs for me.

I just don't care anymore. It's now 8pm and I've spent the past 11 hours on a -1+2 diff!

What a great first day back! Everything is just the way I left it.

I'm investigating PRs for a super legacy codebase. Someone else already approved the PRs -- somebody who has never even run the code or had the project set up before.

The codebase hasn't been touched in two years, and it hasn't been updated in four. It's using CoffeeScript, Node v0, Electron v0.30, and Angular 1.x. I obviously don't have a dev environment anymore, either, and my previous dev env was on Windows, so I'll have to translate my custom build utilities from batch to bash (or much more likely: node).

To make matters worse: the PRs break both the initial project setup and the project itself (NPM can no longer find some installed packages, among other problems). And. someone already merged them into master. So: fuck.

I'm going to yell at the author and tell him to fix his shit. Why? Because when I check out my last commit prior to his PRs, everything works perfectly. Surprise!

I was so done with this project two and a half years ago. I'm still so done with it. I just don't want to maintain this anymore, or honestly even look at it. I would happily rebuild the project from scratch, but updating it from the days of IE8? No way.

Why computers are like men:

1. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
2. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem.
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have had a better model.

Why computers are like women:

1. No one but the Creator understands their internal logic.
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
3. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

Method 1:
1. Read others' people answers on wk70
2. Apply
3. ???
4. Profit
Method 2:
1. cd <ProjectName>
2. git init
3. dotnet new sln
4. dotnet new console #or webapi/lib
5. code .
6. git commit -m "Initial commit"
7. git remote add origin <github link>
8. git push origin master -u
9. profit

The Moment when you signend a contract at a new cool company... Good money... Cool projects... nice ppl... And then you see it... 4 spaces instead of 1 tab, what to do? Go back to my old boss and beg for my old job? Just keep using 1 tab as i did in the last 20 years of my life? Commit suicide?

[ Introduction ]
In Internet culture, the 1% rule is a rule of thumb pertaining to participation in an internet community, stating that only 1% of the users of a website add content, while the other 99% of the participants only lurk.

[ The story ]
A year ago I had a problem with X software.
I opened a ticket on its repository but a week goes by and no one responds. I need it to work! So I opened a pull request and it got merged in a day or two after a quick review.

Seeing that the tickets were many and the maintainers were few, I decided to stay and help.

Today, I am in the top #10 contributors.
I have made 20 commits and edited 4k lines of code. (Honestly, it's not that much, at work I do way more than that, anyway...)

This repository is an alternative to another popular closed-source software and it's massively used by well-known companies
(tech-giants).

[ Stats ]
User base: 20.000 (all of them are devs)
Total contributors: 200 (1%)
Contributors with more than 1 commit: 60 (0.3%)

[ Consideration ]
I would never have believed a year ago that participation could be so low despite the number of dev-users being so high.

The software does not require great technical expertise and if you are using it for work then you already have the skill-set you need to contribute.

Now listen, I know that not everyone wants to contribute. I know right and I respect it ... but really:

The 0.3% ?! Only 60 devs on 20k are active contributors?! Only 200 (1%) devs have ever made a single commit and then they left.

Holy sh**

a tale of daily frustration:

git fetch
*yup I'm up-to-date ...*
git add -p .
*hack in beautiful patch ...*
git status -bs
*correct branch, didn't forget any files ...*
git diff --cached
*yep, that is what I mean to commit ...*
git commit -m"[TKT-NUM] Meaningful commit message"
git log -p -1
*double-checking ... looks good ...*
git push remote tkt-num-etc

*for a brief moment feel accomplished ...*

*notice typo in commit message ...*

I don't have a funny image or punchline to sum this post up. But know that if you recognise this feeling, then I am your brother in git.

1)Get Project/idea
2)Look for the most suitable tech
3)Draw out all the functionality
4)Break into milestones
5)git init
6) git commit
7) Start
8) Test
9) Complete
10) Feel like a King

Why management has such orgasmic attachment to numbers?

Example 1.
Mngr: split this into tasks
Me: done
Mngr: now estimate these tasks
Me: can't. Team is new and codebase is unknown. Any estimations would be subjected to huge error and I will not commit to anything if I'm not at least partially sure.
Mngr: but we need some timeline
Me: so give it yourself. I'm not doing it

Example 2.
Mngr: we need to measure how your knowledge sharing sessions impacts our organisation
Me: how?
Mngr: e.g. amount of bugs lessen in next quarter
Me: bugs can go up and down because of hundred other reasons. Also, knowledge sharing is just to inspire people, it's up to them if they keep educating and growing. Me sharing knowledge 1h per week, I can't guarantee they will understand and apply this new knowledge.
Mngr: but we need to measure it somehow, otherwise it is useless.
Me: <speechless facepalm frustrated>

In case of fire:

1. git commit
2. git push
3. leave building

There was this uni project where the teacher gave us a project to work as a team (the entire class, 17 people). We were meant to use Scrum, and deliver the first release in 1 week.

Turns out no one except me did the work, and this went on in the upcoming sprints, even with me telling the teacher what was going on.

Then, one day, a girl (let's call her Rose) did a commit to git, and I thought that something as going to change...She committed and push a new line at the end of a file.

After 2 months, the project was done. I had done 4k+ lines of Java EE + Hibernate + JSP code (which was very difficult to me) and the grading came out. I got a 7... most of the rest of the class got an 8 or 9. They did nothing.

When questioned by me, teacher said (it was a group project...)

TL;DR: I did the work of 17 people in a university project, got the worst grade of them all.

1. If you dont know, say: Let me check that and get back to you.
2. ALWAYS use legit test-data and test-images.
3. Never argue ten minutes about something you can fix in ten minutes.
4. Fuck blame or glory. Just refactor and commit and feel proud about youself.

Well there were quite some teamwork fails concerning Git and build environments. I covered a few in my previous rants.

Basically I become a tiny bit of FUCKING ANGRY when I have to work with lobotomized pricks who get a segfault at address 0x00000000 in their brain_x68.exe when it comes to handle Git in the simplest ways possible.

Horrible commit messages, unfinished/buggy stuff pushed to master, force-push with fucking 6 months old code +1 change, pushing "resolved" mergeconflicts without resolving, 1 year old issues which are not closed or marked in any commit message, copying repofiles into a backup folder and committing it, not commiting files and change it directly on the FTP...
I HAVE SEEN IT ALL.

If I was not a calm and thoughtful guy I have had exploded and quit a long time ago!
I only help them so they can improve their dev style and workflows.

Why do people fucking do this? You're working in a team, ffs. Even if right now you're the only one working on that branch or whatever, that doesn't make it okay to have the most useless commit messages of all time.

git commit message that I hate:

1. "Adjustment"
2. "Improvement"
3. "Fix Bug"
4. "I commit it but there are bug in this code"
5. "Client request"

YOU KNOW BE MORE SPECIFIC ON YOUR COMMIT MESSAGE!!!

Help. I'm drowning in spaghetti code

I've been working at a working student (15 hours/ week) at a local software company for about a month now... and with everything I learned at college I'm kind of getting eye cancer here.
We still use SVN
We don't have any coding guidelines. No checkstyle, no overview over the program. When I started there I was just giving a ticket and they said good luck.
We just have some basic RCPTT Tests inside Eclipse and most of Themen don't work in the trunk because the gui got changed...
At least we have a ticket system but it doesn't get used by most of the working students.
I found 10 other bugs while reproducing and trying to fix 1 bug.
And I've never seen Java raped so badly. Today I saw a line that started with 6 brackets because whoever wrote it wanted to cast like there was no tomorrow. I see more instanceof in one day than in my whole devlife before.
The only thing we have is two normal employees that review our code before we are allowed to commit it into the trunk.
So yeah... I'm drowning in spaghetti-code.

In case of emergency:

1. git commit
2. git push
3. Leave building

> Failed to push some refs. To prevent you from losing history, non-fast-forward updates were rejected. Merge remote changes before pushing again.

🤦

We should not tolerate censorship.
Beyond all the u.s. hype over elections
(and the division in the west in general), the real story is all the censorship on both sides.
Reasonable voices are quickly banned, while violent voices and loud angry people are amplified.

I broke out of the left-right illusion when
I realized what this was all about. Why
so much fighting in the street was allowed, both
justified and unjustified. Why so much hate
and division and slander, and back and forth
was allowed to be spread.

It's problem, reaction, solution.
The old order of liberal democracy, represented
in the u.s. by the facade of the GOP and DNC,
doesn't know how to handle the free *distributed*
flow of information.

That free-flow of information has caused us to
transition to a *participatory* democracy, where
*networks* are the lever of power, rather than
top down institutions.

Consequently, the power in the *new era* is
to decide, not what the *narrative* is, but
who can even *participate*, in spreading,
ideating, and sharing their opinions on that
narrative, and more broadly, who is even allowed
to participate in society itself.

The u.s. and west wants the chinese model of
control in america. you are part of a network, a
collective, through services and software, and
you can be shut off from *society* itself at
the drop of a pin.

The only way they get that is by creating a crisis,
outright fighting in the streets. Thats why
people keep being released after committing serious
fucking crimes. It's why the DOJ and FBI are
intent on letting both sides people walk.
They want them at each others literal throat,
calling for each other's blood. All so they
can step back and then step in the middle when
the chorus for change cries out loud enough.

And the answer will be

1. regulated tech

2. an end to television media as we know it

3. the ability to shut someone off from any service on a dime

4. new hatespeech laws that will bite *all* sides in the ass.

5. the ability to shape the narrative of society by simply 'pruning' networks as they see fit, limiting the reach of individuals on all sides, who are problematic to
the collective direction.

I was so caught up in the illusion of us-vs-them I didn't
see it before now. This is a monstrous power grab.

And instead of focusing on a farce of election, where the party *organizations* involved are institutional facades for industrialists, we should be focusing on the real issue:

* Failure of law to do its job online, especially failures of slander and libel laws, failures of laws against conspiracy to commit crime or assault

* New laws that offer injunctive relief against censorship, now that tech really is the commons. Because whats worse than someone online whipping up a mob on either side, is
someone who is innocent being *silenced* for disagreeing with something someone in authority said, or for questioning a politician, party, or corporation.

* Very serious felony level laws against doxxing and harassment on all sides, with retroactive application of said laws because theres a lot of people on all sides who won't be satisfied with the outcome until people who are guilty are brought to justice.

Several actually

- root DB access on production
- git commit -am "Stuff" (message)
- Not doing backups
- Using personal licensed software for company work
- 1 commit per day or weekend
- Taking work to home

Kinda all other devs translate incompetent with a lack of knowledge

i would go with not able to recognize his lack of knowledge

Story 1:
once we had a developer, whom was given the task to try out a REST/Json API using Java

after a week he presented his solution,
2 Classes with actual code and a micro-framework for parsing and generating JSON

so i asked him, why he didn't use a framework like jackson or gson, while this presentation he felt pretty offended by this question

a couple of weeks later i met him and he was full of thanks for me, because i showed him, that there are frameworks like that, and even said sorry for feeling offended

- no incompentence here -

Story 2:
once i had a lead dev, who was so self-confident, he refactored (for no reason but refactoring itself) half the app and commited without trying to compile/run test

but not only once, but on a regular basis

as you may imagine, he broke the application multiple times and blamed the other devs

- incompentence warning-

Story 3:

once i had a dev, which wanted to stay up with the latest versions of his libraries

npm update && commit without trying to compile/testing multiple times

- incompentence warning-

Story 4:

once i had a cto

* thought email-marketing is cutting edge
* removed test-systems completely to reduce costs
* liked wordpress
* sets vm to sleep without letting anyone know

- i guess incompetent alert -

This is PART 1/2 of a series of rants over the course of a software engineering class years ago.

We were four team members, two had never failed a class, I’ll refer to them as MT and FT, male and female top students, respectively, and an older student with some real world experience who I’ll refer to as SR.

Rant 1: As I was familiar with the agile methodologies I became the Scrum Master and was set with the task of explaining it to the team members, SR showed up late and nobody seemed interested in learning new methodology. At this point I knew we'd have trouble as a team.

Rant 2: FT made up her project proposal without informing anybody, which required a real client/product owner. We only figured it out after her proposal was accepted as the project, so we ended up working with fake requirements.

Rant 3: This one is partly my fault. I researched first and then worked, which meant I was the last to turn up my work. In one activity MT pressures me and I agree to a deadline so everyone can send their work to the teacher in a timely manner. Since I was the last to finish, I was also asked to give the doc some formatting, which I did in a hurry so it wasn't the best.
The next day MT and FT start complaining about me, saying I took too long and that they expect me to do better next time or else. At the same time they were stressed and in a hurry because we had to explain the project outline in front of the class and they didn't study.
Turns out copying and pasting all your work in less than an hour means you don’t learn anything. FT actually asked me for help days before and I sent her a website in English, which she wasn't very good at, so she just ran it through Google Translate and called it a day.
Later FT called me rude for interrupting MT in the presentation, which I did because he started making up stuff about the project.

Rant 4: SR expressed his dislike for school through profanity in variable names and commit messages. This caused MT and FT to dislike him. I thought it was immature but if anything it should’ve been reported to the teacher and move on.

Rant 5: I was stuck trying to get the REST API working for the project Admittedly this was my fault, too, because I was pushing for the usage of things nobody was familiar with for the sake of learning. This coupled with SR’s profanity led to drama and the progress was dropped, starting over from scratch.

At this point I stepped down from the Scrum Master role as nobody seemed to listen anymore.

So I am conducting an introductory seminar on git and GitHub for juniors and as per my knowledge I've drafted this outline, please add your inputs..

The seminar will be of 1 day only

1. Install and configure Git and Github

2. Digital Signature mapping

3. Git init

4. New Project with HTML

5. Configure remote (git remote add <origin> <url>) ends with .git

6. Git commit (git commit –m “Title” –m “commit message”)

7. Pushing git push (git remote push origin master)

8. Git commit –amend

9. Git pull (git pull origin master)

10. Git checkout (git checkout –b new_branch_name)

11. Do some changes

12. Git push new branch (git remote push origin new_branch_name)

13. Git switch branch (git checkout <name_of_existing_branch>)

14. Pull requests

15. Git log (git log –oneline –graph)

TL;DR:
JuniorDev ignores every advice, writes bad code and complains about other people not working because he does not see their result because he looks at the wrong places.

Okay, so I am really fed up right now.
We have this Junior Dev, who is now with us for circa 8 months, so ca. a year less than me. Our first job for both of us.
He is mostly doing stuff nobody in the team cares about because he is doing his own projects.

But now there's a project where we need to work with him. He got a small part and did implement that. Then parts of the main project got changed and he included stuff which was not there anymore. It was like this for weeks until someone needed to tell him to fix it.
His code is a huge mess (confirmed by senior dev and all the other people working at the project).

Another colleague and me mostly did (mostly) pair programming the past 1-2 weeks because we were fixing and improving (adding functionality) libraries which we are going to use in the project. Furthermore we discussed the overall structure and each of us built some proof-of-concept applications to check if some techniques would work like we planned it.
So in short: We did a lot of preparation to have the project cleaner and faster done in the next few weeks/months and to have our code base updated for the future. Plus there were a few things about technical problems which we need to solve which was already done in that time.
Side note: All of this was done not in the repository of the main project but of side projects, test projects and libraries.

Now it seems that this idiot complained at another coworker (in our team but another project) that we were sitting there for 2 weeks, just talking and that we made no progress in the project as we did not really commit much to the repository.
Side note: My colleague and me are talking in another language when working together and nobody else joins, as we have the same mother tongue, but we switch to the team language as soon as somebody joins, so that other colleague did not even know what we were talking about the whole day.

So, we are nearly the same level experience wise (the other colleague I work with has just one year more professional experience than me) and his work is confirmed to be a mess, ugly and totally bad structured, also not documented. Whereas our code is, at least most of it, there is always space for improvement, clean, readable and re-useable (confirmed by senior and other team members as well).
And this idiot who could implement his (far smaller part) so fast because he does not care about structure or any style convention, pattern or anything complains about us not doing our work.

I just hope, that after this project, I don't have to work with him again soon.
He is also one of those people who think that they know everything because he studied computer science (as everybody in the team, by the way). So he listens to nothing anybody explains to him, not even the senior. You have to explain everything multiple times (which is fine in general) and at some points he just says that he understood, although you can clearly see that he didn't really understand but just wants to go on coding his stuff.
So you explain him stuff and also explain why something does not work or is not a good thing, he just says "yes, okay", changes something completely different and moves on like he used to.

How do you cope with something like this?

! rant

Sorry but I'm really, really angry about this.

I'm an undergrad student in the United States at a small state college. My CS department is kinda small but most of the professors are very passionate about not only CS but education and being caring mentors. All except for one.

Dr. John (fake name, of course) did not study in the US. Most professors in my department didn't. But this man is a complete and utter a****le. His first semester teaching was my first semester at the school. I knew more about basic programming than he did. There were more than one occasion where I went "prof, I was taught that x was actually x because x. Is that wrong?" knowing that what I was posing was actually the right answer. Googled to verify first. He said that my old teachings were all wrong and that everything he said was the correct information. I called BS on that, waited until after class to be polite, and showed him that I was actually correct. Denied it.

His accent was also really problematic. I'm not one of those people who feel that a good teacher needs a native accent by any standard (literally only 1 prof in the whole department doesn't), but his English was *awful*. He couldn't lecture for his life and me, a straight A student in high school, was almost bored to sleep on more than one occasion. Several others actually did fall asleep. This... wasn't a good first impression.

It got worse. Much, much worse.

I got away with not having John for another semester before the bees were buzzing again. Operating systems was the second most poorly taught class I've ever been in. Dr John hadn't gotten any better. He'd gotten worse. In my first semester he was still receptive when you asked for help, was polite about explaining things, and was generally a decent guy. This didn't last. In operating systems, his replies to people asking for help became slightly more hostile. He wouldn't answer questions with much useful information and started saying "it's in chapter x of the textbook, go take a look". I mean, sure, I can read the textbook again and many of us did, but the textbook became a default answer to everything. Sometimes it wasn't worth asking. His homework assignments because more and more confusing, irrelavent to the course material, or just downright strange. We weren't allowed to use muxes. Only semaphores? It just didn't make much sense since we didn't need multiple threads in a critical zone at any time. Lastly for that class, the lectures were absolutely useless. I understood the material more if I didn't pay attention at all and taught myself what I needed to know. Usually the class was nothing more than doing other coursework, and I wasn't alone on this. It was the general consensus. I was so happy to be done with prof John.

Until AI was listed as taught by "staff", I rolled the dice, and it came up snake eyes.

AI was the worst course I've ever been in. Our first project was converting old python 2 code to 3 and replicating the solution the professor wanted. I, no matter how much debugging I did, could never get his answer. Thankfully, he had been lazy and just grabbed some code off stack overflow from an old commit, the output and test data from the repo, and said it was an assignment. Me, being the sneaky piece of garbage I am, knew that py2to3 was a thing, and used that for most of the conversion. Then the edits we needed to make came into play for the assignment, but it wasn't all that bad. Just some CSP and backtracking. Until I couldn't replicate the answer at all. I tried over and over and *over*, trying to figure out what I was doing wrong and could find Nothing. Eventually I smartened up, found the source on github, and copy pasted the solution. And... it matched mine? Now I was seriously confused, so I ran the test data on the official solution code from github. Well what do you know? My solution is right.

So now what? Well I went on a scavenger hunt to determine why. Turns out it was a shift in the way streaming happens for some data structures in py2 vs py3, and he never tested the code. He refused to accept my answer, so I made a lovely document proving I was right using the repo. Got a 100. lol.

Lectures were just plain useless. He asked us to solve multivar calculus problems that no one had seen and of course no one did it. He wasted 2 months on MDP. I'd continue but I'm running out of characters.

And now for the kicker. He becomes an a**hole, telling my friends doing research that they are terrible programmers, will never get anywhere doing this, etc. People were *crying* and the guy kept hammering the nail deeper for code that was honestly very good because "his was better". He treats women like delicate objects and its disgusting. YOU MADE MY FRIEND CRY, GAVE HER A BOX OF TISSUES, AND THEN JUST CONTINUED.

Want to know why we have issues with women in CS? People like this a****le. Don't be prof John. Encourage, inspire, and don't suck. I hope he's fired for discrimination.

So it's 1:00 AM and I have accidentally commit node_modules to my side project

developer makes a "missed-a-semicolon"-kind of mistake that brings your non-production infrastructure down.

manager goes crazy. rallies the whole team into a meeting to find "whom to hold accountable for this stupid mistake" ( read : whom should I blame? ).

spend 1-hour to investigate the problem. send out another developer to fix the problem.

... continue digging ...
( with every step in the software development lifecycle handbook; the only step missing was to pull the handbook itself out )

finds that the developer followed the development process well ( no hoops jumped ).
the error was missed during the code review because the reviewer didn't actually "review" the code, but reported that they had "reviewed and merged" the code

get asked why we're all spending time trying to fix a problem that occurred in a non-production environment. apparently, now it is about figuring out the root cause so that it doesn't happen in production.

we're ALL now staring at the SAME pull request. now the manager is suddenly more mad because the developer used brackets to indicate the pseudo-path where the change occurred.
"WHY WOULD YOU WASTE 30-SECONDS PUTTING ALL THOSE BRACES? YOU'RE ALREADY ON A BRANCH!"

PS : the reason I didn't quote any of the manager's words until the end was because they were screaming all along, so, I'd have to type in ALL CAPS-case. I'm a CAPS-case-hater by-default ( except for the singular use of "I" ( eye; indicating myself ) )

WTF? I mean, walk your temper off first ( I don't mean literally, right now; for now, consider it a figure of speech. I wish I could ask you to do it literally; but no, I'm not that much of a sadist just yet ). Then come back and decide what you actually want to be pissed about. Then think more; about whether you want to kill everyone else's productivity by rallying the entire team ( OK, I'm exaggerating, it's a small team of 4 people; excluding the manager ) to look at an issue that happened in a non-production environment.
At the end of the week, you're still going to come back and say we're behind schedule because we didn't get any work done.
Well, here's 4 hours of our time consumed away by you.

This manager also has a habit of saying, "getting on X's case". Even if it is a discussion ( and not a debate ). What is that supposed to mean? Did X commit such a grave crime that they need to be condemned to hell?

I miss my old organization where there was a strict no-blame policy. Their strategy was, "OK, we have an issue, let's fix it and move on."
I've gotten involved ( not caused it ) in even bigger issues ( like an almost-data-breach ) and nobody ever pointed a finger at another person.
Even though we all knew who caused the issue. Some even went beyond and defended the person. Like, "Them. No, that's not possible. They won't do such dumb mistakes. They're very thorough with their work."
No one even talked about the person behind their back either ( at least I wasn't involved in any such conversation ). Even later, after the whole issue had settled down. I don't think people brought it up later either ( though it was kind of a hush-hush need-to-know event )

Now I realize the other unsaid-advantage of the no-blame policy. You don't lose 4 hours of your so-called "quarantine productivity". We're already short on productivity. Please don't add anymore. 🙏

Keep this in mind: I don't like WordPress and PHP at all!!!
So a couple of days ago my boss asked me if I could extend a custom made WordPress plugin made by our intern. First thought: sure why not? Boss says: it has to be done in less than 100 hours of work (an estimate done by my boss and the intern). Me: I can't tell you that before I have seen the code and what functionality has to be in the extension. Boss: Cool, look it over this weekend and tell me if you want to do it or not.
I looked it through and my answer will probably be: NO WHERE IN HELL am I gonna are this in less that 100 hours! 1. no tests has been performed so I have absolutely no clue if his code works.
2. variable names are mostly: $string_query (whatever that means?), $result, $string_temp and so on.
3. Methods and functions are more than 250 lines long, with shitty formatting, and more comments than code. WTF?
4. The estimate has been made by an intern and my boss (doesn't know much about programming). I haven't been consulted about it....
5. No version control. No branches, no commits other than initial commit. Great.
6. Most comments in the code just tells me what I can read from the code. What it returns and what it takes as params. Can I please know wtf your method call named $booking->run () does? I still haven't found this method in the code after 1 hour of intensively looking for it...

FFS man... Not gonna do this, even though I thought it would have been an interesting project initially.

Sorry for the long rant... I just wish the intern would have consulted me about all this shit, since he obviously have bad practices. *sigh*

When the pull request

1. has 100s of files with commit messages that make a very little sense
2. has the source files sprinkled with duplicate looking code having enough differences to screw my visual diffing ability
3. has too many changes combined when they can be independently reviewed and merged
4. includes me as the sole approver when I don't have enough context on the changes
5. includes references to tickets without any description, justification for the change, testing methodologies, test results, performance metrics comparison, etc. Literally none. It is as if the developer wants me to work with them from the Beginning

Yesterday me and my friend started a project. I set a github repo and said him to "If you make something with code just commit the changes to github so I can see what you did". After a while he said "I've commited something". And I checked what he did. There was 3 commits and they were exactly like that;

Commit 1. Test
Commit 2. Test 2
Commit 3. I wrote something

Then I said "please explain what you did when you commit changes". And he said "why we just upload the codes to the cloud it's more easier".

Today project is ended. Uploading codes to the cloud...

Merge VS Rebase:
- Did you pick a side?
- Practical tips? Like dealing with merge conflicts
- Have you ever regretted using either?

My answer
* My team squash-merges all branches to master so we don't really care what the branch history looks like. Master history should be pretty - but a branch history can be ugly and filled with a dozen commits.
* Practical tip 1: use `git config rerere.enabled true`. rerere stands for "reuse recorded resolution" and this means if you rebase often you don't have to resolve the same merge conflict twice.
* Practical tip 2: use `git commit --fixup oldcommithash` and then rebase with `--autosquash`
* I like using Rebase. But I have regretted the amount of time I've spent on trying to rebase old branches with many commits only to give up and to `git rebase --abort` since I realised I couldn't handle trying to reapply all the commits chronogically as the changes in the 1st commit were no longer relevant.

My plan/resolutions for 2018?

Have at least 1 commit per day w/ maybe exceptions like special holidays and such 😁
(No commits just to have a commit like adding a line of commentary or stuff like that)

#iwannabetheguyshetellsyounottoworryabout

There's this thought that keeps popping up in my head more frequently recently.

We are people who do heavy mind work. Our quality of life directly depends on our ability to come up with solutions. We've been training our minds for years, for decades, to get to the point where we are now.

Now stop for a moment. And imagine. You wake up one morning and you realize you can no longer code. You forgot all of it. You still can copy-paste answers from SO, but you don't know what questions to ask to get to those answers.... Your mind has pulled the DROP TABLE PROGRAMMING;COMMIT; stunt. From hero to zero in just 1 night.

You have no clue what happened, no idea whether you will recover. How does that affect your identity? Would you still try to climb the programmers' tree to the sweet spot you are in now? Would you choose some simpler profession instead, considering your age and time required to master that other profession? If you choose another profession - what would it be?
What would you do with your personal projects? You can't continue them yourself obviously... Would you let them die with the loss of your skills?

How closely is your profession related to your identity?

Now that I consider myself a person who's quite good in the field, this is becoming one of my fears. Sadly, it'll most likely come true someday. Either some accident or just old age, or even diseases/conditions at younger ages - there are so many things that could mess up your mind - the sole tool critical for our profession [to the picky ones: lumbers can't swing axes w/o hands, postman can't deliver mail w/o legs, politics can't lie without tongues, and we, engineers, cannot build with our minds even slightly off].

1. Get an idea
2. Plan the structure to use overengineered solutions
3. $ git init
4. Setup the barebones
5. $ git commit -am "initial commit"
6. Forget the project for the next several months, until another idea pops out and you visit your github to setup a repo for the new project and rediscovers this miserable project's repo
7. Back to 1, repeat

Team outing.

Planned to send out a code review before the trip. Everything was ready.

Then, someone pushed new changes, and I got damn stuck in fixing the UTs.

Currently, ranting from the resort, missing the commit that wouldn't reach a code review.

I expected to finish this task in 1 hour. Well, I should never ever estimate things.

Note: Played a grand piano though.. yeahhhhh..

Right.. I spent the hours leading up to the year change by adding a YouTube to MP3 downloader into my Telegram bot. After a bit of fiddling it turned out okay, and the commit for it was mentioned to the last for the year 2020.

I mentioned this in one of my chats, and users came in with more issues. Told them it's the last commit for the year and I'll keep myself to it. I did adjust the code a bit though to fix those issues, awaiting a commit after midnight.

Midnight passes and 2020 turns into 2021.

I commit the new features, and quickly implemented another one I already thought of as well, but needed its own commit.

Quickly afterwards it turns out that the /mp3 feature actually breaks the bot somewhat, especially on long tracks. Users add a slew of 10h songs into what essentially became a long queue of single-threaded bot action (or rather lack thereof).

I made the /mp3 command accessible to myself only like I did with some other administrative commands already. Still no dice, the bot rejected the commands but executed part of the /mp3 command anyway.

I look a bit further into the code and it turns out that while I was restructuring some functions, I forgot to make the admin() function exit the script after it sends the rejection onwards. This was a serious security issue and meant that all authentication was void. Fortunately the chat did not realize this - one of the commands that became available as a result was literally a terminal on the bot's system.

I fix the issue in 7 commits after midnight total, 3 of which were related to /mp3 and admin(). We're now 1 hour after midnight.

Happy New Year everyone... :')

Dear Dark Side #1

Reformat code in all files
Push changes with commit message "Major changes."
Log 2 hours

When "Programmers" don't understand how something as simple as git works.

>Do they keep whole repository in a zip file for each commit? Having made 100 commits is there 100 zips with all the files? or is each commit additive to the first commit. so that 1 zip with all the files you just get files added or removed based on what commit you are downloading?

Stuff like this makes me cry.....
-commit 1GB file
-commit another 1GB file
Repo is now 3GB? Seems legit right?

Am I the only developer in existence who's ever dealt with Git on Windows? What a colossal train wreck.

1. Authentication. Since there is no ssh key/git url support on Windows, you have to retype your git credentials Every Stinking Time you push. I thought Git Credential Manager was supposed to save your credentials? And this was impossible over SSH (see below). The previous developer had used an http git URL with his username and password baked in for authentication. I thought that was a horrific idea so I eventually figured out how to use a Bitbucket App password.

2. Permissions errors
In order to commit and push updates, I have to run Git for Windows as Administrator.

3. No SSH for easy git access
Here's where I confess that this is a Windows Server machine running as some form of production. Please don't slaughter me! I am not the server admin.
So, I convinced the server guy to find and install some sort of ssh service for Windows just for the off times we have to make a hot fix in production. (Don't ask, but more common than it should be.)
Sadly, this ssh access is totally useless as the git colors are all messed up, the line wrap length and window size are just weird (seems about 60 characters wide by 25 lines tall) and worse of all I can't commit/push in git via ssh because Permissions. Extremely aggravating.

4. Git on Windows hangs open and locks the index file
Finally, we manage to have Git for Windows hang quite frequently and lock the git index file, meaning that we can't do anything in git (commit, push, pull) without manually quitting these processes from task manager, then browsing to the directory and deleting the .git/index.lock file.

Putting this all together, here's the process for a pull on this production server:
Launch a VNC session to the server. Close multiple popups from different services. Ask Windows to please not "restart to install updates". Launch git for Windows. Run a git pull. If the commits to be pulled involve deleting files, the pull will fail with a permissions error. Realize you forgot to launch as Administrator. Depending on how many files were deleted in the last update, you may need to quit the application and force close the process rather than answer "n" for every "would you like to try again?" file. Relaunch Git as Administrator. Run Git pull. Finally everything works.

At this point, I'd be grateful for any tips, appreciate any sympathy, and understand any hatred. Windows Server is bad. Git on Windows is bad.

IT CAN'T BE THAT HARD

1) A CONTROLLER RETURNS HTTP RESPONSES, computed using data received from
2) A SERVICE\MANAGER\YOURMOTHER, which fetches data from a DB\external service\whatever

LITERALLY 2 FUCKING STEPS. I'LL TAKE THAT "SENIOR" IN YOUR TITLE AND CHISEL IT ON YOUR FOREHEAD SO YOU'LL REMEMBER WHAT YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE WHEN YOU COMMIT THIS FUCKING GARBAGE

!dev

ISP: "We are going to give you this piece of garbage Puma6 modem that will cause your internet to randomly die because we want to save a few bucks instead of actually having it function properly"
Me: "Can I replace it with my own?"
ISP: "No?"

I love not having fibre.
So either I shoot myself in the foot by going to another ISP (meaning I'll get *at best* 1/5th of the speed, while my current speed already is a severe bottleneck) or I have to keep content with this fucking piece of garbage internet that decides to commit sudoku over nothing...

In case of fire🔥:
1. git commit
2. git push
3.🏃‍♂️ Leave the building

Holy crap, just started working again on a personal project after a 1-month hiatus... Really struggling to get my head back where it was, I have (almost) no clue what I was doing or why.
Even the commit log and the comments and docs I've left around seem empty somehow.

Any good tips/tools for retracing steps? How do you start working on a codebase you've never touched before?

Typical Git work flow on a feature branch:

Commit#1 : The silly feature itself that took 10 minutes to code
Commit#2 : Added unsaved files
Commit#3 : Fix unit tests
Commit#4 : Fix
Commit#5 : Fix
Commit#6 : Fix
Commit#7 : Various Fix
Commit#8 : Added unsaved files
Commit#9 : Merge
Commit#10 : Fixed unit tests
Commit#11 : Code Review tasks
Commit#12 : Revert- Code Review tasks
Commit#13: Refactor part 1
Commit#14: Refactor part 2
Commit#15: Deleted unit tests
Commit#16: Added checking for null
Commit#17: Completely different feature's bugfix
Commit#18: Code review spacing corrections
*Approved*

Trying to merge, then merge conflicts.....

It was around for a while but I didn’t realize it was it for a long time. I was fixing computers for cash and spending in on booze while in primary school. Making websites for cash and for fun while in high school. Some guys wanted to buy my databases at the time and sending me emails that my websites rocks. I didn’t cared cause I party a lot and I didn’t need money.
Sex drugs and rock and roll was my life not a fucking computer.
Since I never had problems with math I passed exams and got myself to university and dropped out cause of those 3 funny things above. Turned out to pass exams after second year when math and physics disappeared you need to study more then 1 day before exam and party was more important for me.

I failed tremendously. My girlfriend left me I was out of money I got back to my hometown with my laptop and I somehow between depression, drugs, alcohol and killing myself reminded I was getting money from websites and I can try to follow that movie.

At that time I didn’t read single book in english in my life. I know some basic english so I decided to try to read some actionscript2 pdf. Why actionscript ? I liked those simple games. Those were fun and there was nothing better. I was reading first book at least 10 times with vocabulary that took about a month until I remembered whole book and second book was faster like 1 week third was 1 day and from then thing moved a little faster. I discovered flex just before adobe acquired macromedia and started writing in it. Started answering to some questions on forum and build some portfolio website with fancy 3d animations and stuff and finally applied for 2 jobs.
They both were amazed by my website and one of them sent me some task to do and I did it overnight and sent them back. They wanted to hire me and I need to respond to them.
Second job they invited me for talking and asking about math, if I’m ok with 3d and stuff and they offered me job closer to my home town so I picked them. The code was amazing, 3d equations, quaternions, complicated stuff bit very well written by some company that dropped project before launch and my first task was add some small feature.
I remember first day in elevator with my former boss who told me to not to get scary and take it slowly I was trying to do my task as fast as I can worried I will be fired if I don’t do it and nobody else will hire me and I won’t manage to recover from second failure. It was even more fighting with myself that I will fail again then with this task lol.
I’ve done the feature third day and when they said it’s cool and I can commit my changes it appeared to me that It might be this shit that will get me out of trouble.
I was never again wrong about programming and so wrong about trouble but that’s a different story...

Today was my last day before taking a week off from work. When I originally pushed my branch, GitHub knew I had 7 files changed. I squashed my commits and pushed so that there was one commit. GitHub then decided I had Infinity files changed. Fun way to end the week, posting “I *swear* that I didn’t just put up a PR for review before taking a week off that has Infinity file changes.”

TeamWork 1 week before release de projet

Guys i dont know why but all the projet is fuckup in Git ...

Me: where is your firts commit of all these shit ?

He: just there

Me : git reset eb23ae --hard && git push origin HEAD --force

Me: now you sit there and you play with your pencil ! 😡😠

Thx

1. Wrote super complex snippet w/o comments.
2. Commit & push.
3. Read code after 1 month
4. Ask yourself how you wrote that.

principle software developer who does not code, design, or architect,

instead, do random eslint fixes which create conflict with everyone's branches.

1 line of code "fix" per commit.

there goes 26 commits

"Sweet, I fixed story 1 and can commit! ...but issue 2 is pretty small, let me just work on that first so there's 1 pull request".

4 hours later, issue 2 not done yet, and I can't push push story 1 to QA until I finish it. I really need to stop doing that.

Pretty busy day at work today.. in the midst of everything, a co worker asked me to sync their branch on GitHub since they don't know how to.

Told them to commit any changes do that there wouldn't be any conflicts.

Their response: "you should already have my latest from 2 days ago"

.....
Two questions that I should have asked:

1) what have you been doing for two days?
2) why am I doing everything else?

:\

Random opinion question:

I'm working on a thing where the user provides a big CSV and we process it and put it in the database, or update existing records.

This data impacts other things, but the data isn't front and center as a group of n the application for them to notice / see again (well they can query for it).

I'm thinking of taking the CSV and then presenting them with a table showing how we processed that data giving them a chance to review it before they commit it to the database...

I like this idea for two reasons:

1. If something goes sideways there's a chance someone will see it and I'm not sure I can do enough validation on a big ass CSV from god knows where to be sure we're going to process it right... (I'm going to do some validation but just can't cover it all)

2. It takes some of the mystery out of what happened / is happening for the user for.

Anyone try this in the past? Seems reasonable, but lots of things do before they go sideways.

Introducing the new: Sideproject finisher! You asked for it, DevRant, and unlike you - we finished it!

Instructions:
1. Load chamber with single bullet
2. Apply directly to the forehead
3. Commit- something you should have done more of before you came to this

Commit messages:
1- Defect 6380: fix update of user without end date
2- Defect 6380: fix update of user without end date 2
3- Defect 6380: forgot unit test
4- Defect 6380: fix test
5- Defect 6380: dammit!
6- Defect 6380: raaaaaah!!!!
7- Defect 6380: kill me now

1) Miss Ludum Dare 40 because you remembered it is on one day after it started.
2) See Ludum Dare 41 is this week on time.
3) Lack the time to do it.
4) Commit suicide.

If you ever wondered how to write a really bad commit message, here are some of my colleague's...

1. -
2. fixed conflict
3. initail push
4. css fix
5. amends to css
6. footer

And then a ton more hyphens. I wouldn't care as much if the code he wrote actually worked. But when it's down to his colleague's to fix his god awful code, it makes it a tad annoying trying to trawl through useless commit messages trying to find where he dun goofed. /rant

$git commit -m "fix fucking bug again"
$git push

fatal: Right now you can only push 1 commit every 2 rants (every 1 rant for gitRant++ members) because we want to make sure everyone's commit are pushed in a relaxed state of mind! 2 rants to go until you can push another commit.

Trying to convince the class that test-driven development + DTSTTMPW ("do the simplest thing that might possibly work") + pair programming is the way to go, our software dev prof had us split in groups of two that would each get a turn to
1. add a unit test
2. edit the code so it passes the test
3. commit the change

The goal was to write a java class that converts integers to roman numerals.
Each group had only 2 minutes before the prof made them revert their changes.
After 45 minutes the code was just 10 lines of this:
if ( n == 1 )
return "I";
else if ( n == 2 )
return "II";
else if ( n == 3 ) ...

Current directory:

upstream
potatoecode

find ./upstream -maxdepth 1 -type d -ls >> potatoecode/.gitignore

pushd potatoecode
git add .gitignore
git commit -m 'Updated gitignore" .gitignore
git rm -r --cached .
git add .
git commit -am "Purgatory"
popd

*watching with a big smile the burning CI*

--

Story of how I made some devs today very sad. They now have the joyful task to think of a better way to code than to create a nightmare blob of modified source code from upstream - where upstream has ...

- a rest API
- an extension / plugin system
- an system to even modify db schema via an API.

But nooooo.... That would be too good.

Instead one just creates an potatohead of upstream source code with modifications without any version tracking or stuff like that.

Sometimes I really wonder if the devs at our company are masochists and want to be punished....

Someone raised a PR for the opensource project "fast XML parser". Since this was a major change, it was difficult to review. I asked for the purpose and requested to break it into multiple PRs, where 1 PR should have related changes only. And any good change but unnecessary change can be avoided to scheduled for later.

We had long arguments for a month or two.

I don't know why but instead of breaking the PR, the contributor keep updating his PR for every commit someone made on the original repo.

He also stopped contributing for other changes, and commenting on other issues. (Change in the behavior)

Finally after 5-6 months, I had to close the PR as it was not active, having conflicts and not as per guidelines.

People in companies who make bad git commit messages beacuse they do not care... Hey, "change 1", "update" makes so much sense. And companies who do not care to have some guidelines.

temp commits are generally more useful than git stash.

instead of stashing, do a commit with a message like "THIS IS NOT A COMMIT, DON'T INCLUDE THIS". with some discipline you can then go back to your branch, `git reset --soft HEAD~1` and voila, it's similar to a `git stash pop`.

but it's better because you can do this in multiple branches at the same time and there's no fear of accidentally dropping some stashed commit.

1) Read the ticket.
2) Create a branch with ticket number in name.
3) Move ticket to Working now section.
4) Make some changes according to the ticket.
5) Commit changes to branch. Than pull it.
6) Create pull request and submit it.
7) Move ticket into In review section.
8) Move to another ticket.

Tickets:
#7 - Change background size in product item.
#8 - Add icon to info flash message.
#9 - Add adaptiveHeight parameter to the slick slider.

Done, now another 30 tickets...
Yep, this is my workflow i'm forced to now.

Today's story.

1. Git commit all changes
2. Need to git pull bcz of master change
3. Mistakly did git commits undo.
All my changes fucked up.

At last
Ctr+z saved my ass

Just joined a new company and can only describe the merge process as madness.....is it or am I the one that is mad?!

They have the following branches:

UAT#_Development branch
UAT#_Branch (this kicks of a build to a machine named UAT#)

Each developer has a branch with the # being a number 1 to 6 except 5 which has been reserved for UAT_Testing branch.

They are working on a massive monolith (73 projects), it has direct references to projects with no nuget packages. To build the solution requires building other solutions in a particular order, in short a total fucking mess.

Developer workflow:

Branch from master with a feature or hotfix branch

Make commits to said branch and test manually as there are no automated tests

Push the commits to their UAT#_Development branch, this branch isn't recreated each time and may have differences to all the other UAT#_Development branches.

Once happy create a pull request to merge from UAT#_Development to UAT#_Branch you can approve your own pull request, this kicks off a build and pushes it to a server that is named UAT#.

Developer reviews changes on the UAT# server.

QA team create a UAT/year/month/day branch. Then tell developers to merge their UAT#_branch branches in to the previously created branch, this has to be done in order and that is done through a flurry of emails.

Once all merges are in it then gets pushed to a UAT_Testing branch which kicks off a build, again not a single automated test, and is manually tested by the QA team. If happy they create a release branch named Release/year/month/day and push the changes into it.

A pull request from the release branch is then made to pre-live environment where upon merge a build is kicked off. If that passes testing then a pull request to live is created and the code goes out into production.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh it's a total mess. I knew when I took on this job it would be a challenge but nothing has prepped me for the scale of the challenge!! My last place it was trunk based development, commit straight to master, build kicks off with automated testing and that just gets pushed through each of the environments, so easy, so simple!

They tell me this all came about because they previously used EntityFramework EDMX models for the database and it caused merge hell.

this is a repost organization post. each time you are going to post a classical joke, please find it from items below, and write as comment, the number of the repost. and people will give you ++'s to your comments as if you actually reposted the post. also, feel free to make additions to the list. syntax is:

"(n): [repost context]" for a new item (please do not mess with the order)

"-- [n]: [personal comment]" for simulating the repost.

here we go:

(0): the comic strip about rescuing princesses in different languages.

(1): in case of fire git commit, git push, leave the building.

(2): wanna hear a udp joke? i don't care if you get it.

(3): that joke about java devs wearing glasses because they can't c#.

--------------

An example repost:

-- 0: omg princess lol :)))

So.....
Cassandra vm had a crash yesterday...
2 nodes with rep factor 1. (FML)

One node wouldnt start... Eventually found out one of the commit replays had an exception (the one at the time of the crash).

Boss trying to push me towards a fix all this time which was:
"Let's delete the vm and have Cassandra running on one vm"

There are not we enough curses in the world.
🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕

P.S. there are no backups.

This depends mainly on the programming language with which I want or have to develop a project.

I like to use Behat for PHP and other simple things. At the moment I only have clients who want to implement projects in PHP. God knows why.

For more complicated things I like to use yeoman, but I have to say that there are also a lot of horrible generators, so I follow the official instructions more often.

Otherwise, the usual procedure:
1) git init
2) Planning of features and functions (if not already specified by the client)
3) Select frameworks (mostly necessary)
4) Start programming
5) Commit often
6) Commit often
7) Commit often

1. Pop breth mints to cover the smell of Jack in my coffee.
2. Headphones + NPR because my cube farm is loud AF and the owners idiot son sits right next to me watching YouTube comedy all day.
3. Check calander and commit log while VS loads our 100 project solution.
4. Get cracking

Back here after a long time. Hey guys what's up?
-----------------------
So I was recently pushing some code into github, and i realized that i had over 500 repos, 400 of them being forks. I guess my 3yrs before self had thought that he will be the only saviour of all the android libs in the world.

So i am thinking of re organising my complete github ; like nuking the forks, combining my multiple mini project repos to 1 and keeping the repos to at most 10-12.

Is that a good idea? I mean companies usualy judge by github profiles, and after reorganising, most of my commit history would be lost.

<You know , tech world is weird. in real life, people are judged by their homes, so they keep their home tidy. but here, people are judged by their github profiles, so they keep their github profiles messy>

Question about git. I worked on dev branch and made 10 commits.

Then I squash merged 10 commits from develop to master and made a release build.

Now problem is if I make a pull request from develop to master bitbucket will still show that master is behind (because develop has fixes in 10 commits while master has all of them squashed in 1 commit).

Now my question is whats the best way to make sure master and develop are synced (basically that master would have everything what develop has) ?

should I just merge master into develop back after the release?

Just realized that before i did that commit there was this guy (let's call him a friend, fucking asshole from a different department who can't see someone is working before continuing their stupid conversations) took my attention away for 15-20 mins and i being distracted didn't commit 1 file out of 7 and ended up changing (exact same file over next code merge) it.
Now Everything fails.
Sweet afternoon work is gone.
To be repeated ....

Productivity hack - For me, it’s mostly a single word - planning. I wasn’t always good at it, definitely not yet a “master” of it, but breaking that proverbial elephant up into smaller pieces, and organizing a plan of action for dealing with them is the #1 productivity “hack” for me. Sorry that it’s not an actual shortcut, or anything…I personally don’t believe in those anymore. Complementary habits to this are thoroughly commenting code, having descriptive commit messages, file names, and variable names, maintaining documentation. Use that Readme.md. This is true of any project, even if I’m the only developer - never underestimate your own ability to totally forget shit.

finally we started adopting gitflow concept and it worked pretty well for most of the projects and devops guy came in saying Gitflow needs to die in a fire because we devops is the best, all the tech companies are using it.

But...

1. gitflow can be tweaked to suit the project's need
2. gitflow can work with devops model
3. our projects are still release based

noooooooooo! gitflow needs to die in a fire! everyone needs to commit directly to master branch now and we CI directly to production!

and some dude started doing so because some random dude said it. wtf?

whats wrong with people?

I didn't get into GSoC while writing code which was to be a major aspect of the next release of SymPy. I tell you this org. is maintained by 1 maintainer and 4-5 other members. While most don't understand the code written but will teach you to write some decorator class. I don't want to name that sucker,but he made some changes and then other reviewed and told to change back to what I had originally done. I wanted to cut his throat while I had to made him understand the code. After some 10 days,when I asked that it is ready to be merged,he says "I don't understand this part of code". Fucking bastard if you didn't understand,then why the fuck were you reviewing mine? The people who just did beginner changes but were from October got selected. This org. doesn't check your ability to resolve issues and understand code,but basically wants more number of commits,whether the commit may be mere change in documentation or so, doesn't matter. Again,these people want to help and reviewed my pr,but there should a valid argument. They meaninglessly just wanted to add their name to reviewers for making their proposal strong without helping or say by just showing off. I wrote unit tests, doctests, wrote a full-fledged function, resolved many PRs,and was working alone on one pr which was for the main release of SymPy,but I didn't get selected. Why? Because I started contributing in March. When will these guys understand what matters is how much you contribute not when you start to contribute. The substance and difficulty level of PRs should be considered not just no. of PRs. Hope this org. becomes more beginner friendly and open to more clear discussions rather than showing off.
☮️
Thanks.

Cherry picked my first commit today, am proud.

Luckily I'd done all the work for a develop MR in 1 commit and could just cherry pick the 1 commit into master.

Not sure how I'll go with a commit range lol

You work in a team, for a team to move forward successfully the team should work in sync. A team always has a goal and a plan to get to it. There are times when the team needs to take a different direction therefore the set path should always be available for change because our environments dictate it.

We all have different styles of working and different opinions on how things should work. Sometimes one is wrong and the other is right, and sometimes both are wrong, or actually sometimes both are right. However, at the end of it all, the next step is a decision for the team, not an individual, and moving forward means doing it together. #KickAssTeam

The end result can not come in at the beginning but only at the end of an implementation and sometimes if you’re lucky, during implementation you can smell the shit before it hits the fan. So as humans, we will make mistakes at times by using the wrong decisions and when this happens, a strong team will pull things in the right direction quickly and together. #KickAssTeam

Having a team of different opinions does not mean not being able to work together. It actually means a strong team! #kickAssTeam However the challenging part means it can be a challenge. This calls for having processes in place that will allow the team members to be heard and for new knowledge to take lead. This space requires discipline in listening and interrogating opinions without attachment to ideas and always knowing that YOUR opinion is a suggestion, not a solution. Until it is taken on by the team. #KickAssTeam We all love our own thinking. However, learning to re-learn or change opinions when faced with new information should become as easy to take in and use.

Now, I am no expert at this however through my years of development I find this strategy to work in a team of developers. It’s a few questions you ask yourself before every commit, When faced with working in a new team and possibly as a suggestion when trying to align other team members with the team.

The point of this article, the questions to self!

Am I following the formatting standard set?

Is what I have written in line with official documentation?

Is what I am committing a technical conversion of the business requirement?

Have I duplicated functionality the framework already offers?

I have introduced a methodology, library, heavily reusable component to the system, have you had a discussion with the team before implementing?

Are your methods and functions truly responsible for 1 thing?

Will someone you will never get to talk to or your future self have documentation of your work?
Either via point number 2, domain-specific, or business requirements documentation.

Are you future thinking too much in your solution?

Will future proof have a great chance of complicating the current use case?

Remember, you can never write perfect code that cures every future problem, but what you can do perfectly is serve the current business problem you are facing and after doing that for decades, you would have had a perfect line of development success.

Last week, I was stuck with an annoying bug. Come to work today, reverted back to the previous commit, started over and everything worked.

I guess this is (it was working on my machine)^(-1)

which type are you ??

**Manager:** Hey, we've got a little hiccup in the production environment. I know it's Friday evening and you're probably daydreaming about pizza, but could you give it a peek?

**Type 1:** Man, this is like finding a needle in a haystack while wearing sunglasses at night. Might take me a few hours... or days. But hey, wish me luck and have an epic weekend!

**Type 2:** Eureka! Found the gremlin. It looks like XYZ person tried to be a bit too creative on commit number 2234324. Maybe they had too much caffeine? Anyway, could you have a chat with them? And oh, may your weekend be as smooth as a fresh jar of peanut butter.

**Type 3:** Detective mode activated! Found the sneaky bug. It was XYZ person's "masterpiece" in commit number 2234324. But fear not! I've put on my superhero cape and fixed it in commit number 345453345.

**Type 4:** This issue again? It's like a recurring bad dream about forgetting your pants! I've revamped the whole thing so we don't have to relive this nightmare. If someone tries to pull this off again, our CI/CD will roast them like a marshmallow over a campfire.

**Type 5:** Ta-da! Fixed the glitch, jazzed up the design, and sprinkled in some extra logging magic. Now, troubleshooting will be as easy as pie. Speaking of which, I've got time for a coffee and maybe a slice of pie before heading out. Cheers!
Type 6 **Gloomy**: Oh, the digital clouds have gathered again. This issue is like a never-ending rain on a Monday morning. I've peered into the abyss of our code, and it's... well, it's deep and dark. I'll need some time, a flashlight, and maybe a comforting blanket. If you don't hear from me in a few hours, send in a search party with some hot cocoa.

How do you deal with multiple git identities?

Im working fulltime + freelancing + working on my own projects and all of them are on different gitlab emails. It was very annoying to keep remembering to set my git email to a proper one each time I switch to work on another project.

Right now I came up with something easier:

I started using just 1 gitlab profile (personal one) and added my both company e-mails as secondary emails to my personal gitlab profile.

This way I can keep my git identity the same (personal e-mail address) and if I push to company1 repo or company2 repo the commit author e-mail addres is shown email@company1.com and email@company2.com as these emails are given access to private repos and they are added to my personal gitlab account.

Just wondering if these companies will see my commits to other repos by viewing my personal gitlab profile or no? Or if there is an easier way to handle multiple git identities without having to switch between them each time I open another project and want to push some commits.

1am monday morning.. last commit of last week👀
What happens: previous commit crashed git repo and destroyed the HEAD😠 after 1 hour of repairing now 500 damn files have to be merged........ FUCK MY LIFE

Oh Shit, Git!?!
In case of fire 🔥:
1. git commit
2. git push
3. git check-tf-out of that goddamn building
(Totally upto ya btw if you don't wanna get transformed into Kentucky fried hooman)
4. git push -o restoftheday.skip

I was asked to make release branches which will change my gitflow. Am I understanding it correctly now? Fix me if I'm wrong

So I do my fixes in develop, once Im done I squash merge them into 1 commit. Then I make a release branch from develop, if everything is fine I release it. After release I merge back release branch to master and thats it?