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Search - "nobody cares"
(Q: How much are you allowed to Google as a developer?)
“You’re allowed to Google as much as you want. This is not school, you’re employed to solve a problem. Nobody cares whether you Google for the answer or remember the answer from another Googling.”15
Another day, another hit piece against gaming.
So, a 15-year old boy hanged himself and the media goes all „This was caused by this game“, even though NO FUCKING TRACES OF THE GAME WERE FOUND ON THE LAPTOP OF THE DECEASED!!!
And then of course my freaking parents go all lecturing me about how the internet twists the brain into not being adequate towards reality etc.
First off, CAN THE FUCKING COLLECTION OF COCKSUCKERS that is the fucking media just fucking get a grip on reality? It was literally said in the same sentence that the supposed game that caused that was not found in any form on the person's laptop. You would think an online game that you take months to play through would need at least some fucking download to run, right? Unless it was a freaking video chat bullshit that they call a „game“ just for the fucking spite of gamers.
Second, HOW FUCKING LONG WILL IT FUCKING TAKE FOR PEOPLE TO FUCKING ACCEPT THAT IT'S NOT THE TECH THAT MAKES PEOPLE KILL THEMSELVES? How hard is it to fucking understand?
Third... How do people in their 60s freaking think they understand anything about modern gaming when they have no freaking way of interacting with it other than these hit pieces? They certainly give more fucks about what a hired bitch of a lying „journalist“, that cannot even talk properly, says. Oh, they care so much about the children. Have they never thought that people are killing themselves exactly because they feel nobody cares about them?
Fourth. How fucking long do parents like mine deny the reality that just as long as they see me as an incomplete copy of my sisters I will be suicidal? Let me guess... It's video games causing me to be oh, so inadequate when I've not played any of them for quite some time...
Fifth... How am I out of touch with reality when these people have never known how I „work“, so to speak, as a person, and they've been the ones basically dictating all my life? Let me see why I'm unhappy...
I know I complain a lot. Sorry for that. But I just cannot stand people like them. People that lie all the time and project that on you while depriving you of any means of defending yourself in a debate...45
I put a lot of work into trying to explain to you muggles what I do all day in a way you can understand (it's hard, trust me) and you still reject it as boring nerd crap. I'm sick of it! What if you told me working at that restaurant is "putting water on plates, wiping it off, and putting meat and cheese between slices of bread" and I said "wtf is that, and who cares?" Wouldn't that hurt your feelings, that I didn't even attempt to make a connection with you, friend? That I didn't even attempt to step outside my experience to meet yours? Isn't it equally insulting how far you have to dumb it down, just for me to lose interest entirely? And yes, I know that's not your specific task. That only proves my point further.
And why, exactly? Conceptually, you handle pre-digested poop all day.
_I teach plastic to think._ Sometimes it even thinks better than you do.
How is my job less interesting?
And what's more, why does EVERYONE seem to think so?
How do you expect people like me to keep your iPhones, bank accounts, and self-driving cars working if you alienate us like an alternate species for building those things? I mean really. You people treat us with a disinterest harmonious with homophobia. "Don't ask, don't tell." Except you do ask. And then you condescend as if working with my brain makes me less worthy of your attention than your exciting minimum-wage restaurant job.
Have fun with that, by the way.
Oh, and you're welcome for <object I fixed that wasn't really broken>. Maybe next time, just google it.
I know you won't.23
Probably the most heart breaking thing to hear as a Developer - " Nobody cares about your backend, front-end is the priority !" :/11
Anyone else been in a conf call where nobody cares what you say? No matter how good you explain your point. And everytime you say something, someone else just starts talking over you.
And then you realize that you have muted yourself.15
Root has a deadline
I've been working on this CCPA ticket for awhile. Admittedly too long, but I'm new to the codebase and it's fucking sprawling. There has also been a lot of back-and-forth on the ticket.
Anyway, I've had a few blockers, such as how mailers work, the legal copy, where to put a admin-facing link to the dashboard, how to build the jira integration (and its creds), etc.
Quite awhile ago I asked Mr. Product, "Where should I put the ccpa dashboard link?" To which he responds: "I'll get you the answer today!" Awesome. Except he didn't. That day came and went without a peep. So, the next day I ask again: "Where should I put the ccpa dashboard link?" To which he responds: "I'll get you the answer today!" And that day comes and goes, too. I ask again, and you guessed it: "I'll get you the answer today." Repeat ad nauseam.
I also asked about the Jira integration and credentials. I got about the same treatment as above, but with a tiwst: they tell me to talk to / continue to bug Mr. H instead. Except Mr. H had been on PTO for weeks. Every time I ask, they keep referring me to him. A little over two weeks later (yesterday), I finally got a response from him. Yay! I was preoccupied with finishing the dashboard (which wasn't in the original ticket for some reason) so I didn't get a chance to look into it yet. After asking his boss three times, Mr. Product also finally (!!!) gave me a response on the link placement today, too! Though not directly: he discussed it with said boss in a group chat that I'm a part of, but never tagged me or told me directly. So, now I know where to put it (I think), but I have no idea how that area of the site is built (it's dynamic based on domain, login, and roles), so adding it will still be difficult.
The best part:
Today during standup, some lady I've only rarely seen before attends the meeting, doesn't say anything until the very end, and then announces that everything must be code-complete by tomorrow for release, and then promptly signs off.
For fuck's sake. I've had blockers on this for weeks, and now I need to finish it by fucking tonight?
I still don't know how to build the mailers (because translations and formats), nor how to actually send emails using them. I don't know how to modify the footer (dynamic, complex), how to add the admin-facing link (dynamic, complex), nor how build a Jira integration (haven't even looked yet). I just got unblocked on two of these fucking today. and it needs to be done and code reviewed by tomorrow?
No bloody way.
Maybe I should go back to my previous job. 😡19
Nobody cares what the code does when it works. Everybody cares about it when it doesn't work. You just can't win. 😤3
During scrum, we have a remote QA Engineer who literally includes what she and her child do during her lunch breaks.
"Yesterday during lunch, little Jimmy and I went clothes shopping during lunch and I got him some new shirts and they're 100% cotton"
NOBODY FUCKING CARES!!12
Most common UX blunder: Icons
FUCK icons. The big problem with them is they assume a level of familiarity with the product. Someone who has never seen a folder before won't know what a button with a folder icon on it does!
This can be remedied with text NEXT to the icon, giving the button a readable purpose. But guess what? THAT SHIT AIN'T COMMON ENOUGH.
Here's a good example for you; cars. I am familiar with cars, but there's some fucking icons that I can't even figure out. And imagine if you aren't familiar with cars? That's what happens all the time; there's a hundred unused buttons on a car's interior these days because painted upon them is an icon, and only an icon! And who the hell cares enough to take out the manual and finger through it until you find that specific icon. In my experience, almost nobody.
Let's bring it back to software. It's the most overlooked UX sin to have icons without labels or some sort of describing text. As programmers, you and me have seen and can instantly recognize thousands of icons. But to get the typical user's experience, load up a complex program like Blender (assuming you aren't familiar with it yet) and see if you can tell me what all of the icons mean. Or don't, here's a screenshot from Blender 2.8 Beta. None of these icons have any labels.
Fucking frustrating, isn't it?
Don't rely on tooltips! Nobody wants to hover over every fucking icon and wait for it to pop up just to find what they're fucking looking for! Don't forget that a lot of users DON'T EVEN KNOW THEY EXIST! (This number isn't shrinking as fast as you'd expect with the newer generations, because many of the newer generations use touch devices where tooltips don't exist at all)
There's my UX rant. Remember that users are afraid to click things which they don't know what they do. For the most positive user experience, give users something to read; a way to understand what the fuck is going on without experimenting, and without waiting for the tooltip to appear.30
Arch users are literally like vegans, or guys who study the law - they can’t live normally if they don’t tell you that they use it. Just because you can install it, doesn’t make you instantly a Linux god. It’s like Kali users that they think that they’re hackers if they install it, or MacBook users that think that they are “kool kids” because they have a laptop that thousands of other people have.
(possibly political, but not really)
I think there's an under-reaction culture around covid19. People are mitigating it to be "just a bad flu" and keep bringing up the 2-3% death rate.
I see that people may have good intentions but spreading lies just to make it seem like the virus isn't bad is worse than the media overreacting.
I'm tired of people just repeating the same "ugh, calm down, it's just the flu!" Just because they don't want people to worry. While panic isn't good, disregard is worse.
The "bad flu" stage is only the second of three stages. Stage one is minor symptoms (so nobody cares if they are sick at this stage) coupled with patients being highly infectious (you can imagine, this is a bad combo)
Stage two is of course the famous "bad flu".
Stage three is fucking respiratory issues including pneumonia, AFTER you have already gone through stage two, which can be rough on its own.
The CDC (not any media) has issued warnings to those at high risk to stock up on supplies and medication they may need. As usual for this sort of stuff, the elderly and those with pre-existing conditions are in the high risk groups.
2% death rate (low end) is one in 50 people. That could be someone you know. 4% (high end) is one in just 25 people. That's the average high school class size where I live. That's a lot, that's pretty deadly.
Stop calling it a bad flu. Stop listening to people on Facebook, CNN, and devRant. Please visit the CDC, they are constantly giving updates.
Have you ever been so alone on a project that even if everything seems easy, you don't want to work on it because nobody cares about it?1
Finally after one year I understood how to carry out my job. I should do exactly NOTHING. I stopped completely organizing the team, solving bugs, helping the team developing and solving problems, explore and try stupid things said by CEO, PM and consultants.
I stopped for 2 months now and nothing happened.
I work remotely, nobody knows if I'm working or not, because nobody cares really about priorities, bugs, customers or products development.
I gain 10K$ (ten thousand) per month.
I attend skype meeting once per week or less. I say yes to everything, nobody gives a shit to what I say, even if they consider me the technical director. Actually in the meetings I only take care of being considered the technical director.
I achieved the mythical 4 hours working week.
I keep skype open in all my devices in order to answer promptly in case of problem, wherever I'm am, that's the most important thing right now.
I attended some meeting from the toilet or from the bedroom.
It was hard. To understand that the board is only after the next funding and not looking to develop a real product. It's hard to pretend helping people while thinking inside you "fuck you".
You have to let go the "guilt": if you can't login, I KNOW that is my fault, that there is a bug, that is possible to solve it, that resources and planning are needed etc. That's guilt. Just let go and say "next release" and never include it in the next release.
In this way I discovered that some users are paying the application even if they can't login.
The company is not going to disappear in the next 5 years. On the contrary, it's going to receive more money.
So the only "bad" thing is, what will I write in my CV in 5 years?20
🎶 Simple Plan - I'm just a dev 🎶
I woke up it was 7
I waited 'til 11
To figure out that no one would call
I think there are a lot of specs
I just haven't received them yet
They are the only thing that I really need to know
Because I can't find them on stack overflow
And here it goes
I'm just a dev
And life is a nightmare
I'm just a dev
I know that it's not fair
Nobody cares 'cause I'm alone
And the world is
Having more fun than me
And maybe when the projects dead
I'll finally go to bed
But I'm staring at these four lines again
I'll try to think about the last time
That they were working fine
These things have business rules that I don't know
And they're gonna leave me here to figure it out on my own
And here it goes
I'm just a dev
And life is a nightmare
I'm just a dev
I know that it's not fair
Nobody cares 'cause I'm alone
And the world is
Having more fun than me
"four million dollars"
TL;DR. Seriously, It's way too long.
That's all the management really cares about, apparently.
It all started when there were heated, war faced discussions with a major client this weekend (coonts, I tell ye) and it was decided that a stupid, out of context customisation POC had that was hacked together by the "customisation and delivery " (they know to do neither) team needed to be merged with the product (a hot, lumpy cluster fuck, made in a technology so old that even the great creators (namely Goo-fucking-gle) decided that it was their worst mistake ever and stopped supporting it (or even considering its existence at this point)).
Today morning, I my manager calls me and announces that I'm the lucky fuck who gets to do this shit.
Now being the defacto got admin to our team (after the last lead left, I was the only one with adequate experience), I suggested to my manager "boss, here's a light bulb. Why don't we just create a new branch for the fuckers and ask them to merge their shite with our shite and then all we'll have to do it build the mixed up shite to create an even smellier pile of shite and feed it to the customer".
"I agree with you mahaDev (when haven't you said that, coont), but the thing is <insert random manger talk here> so we're the ones who'll have to do it (again, when haven't you said that, coont)"
I said fine. Send me the details. He forwarded me a mail, which contained context not amounting to half a syllable of the word "context". I pinged the guy who developed the hack. He gave me nothing but a link to his code repo. I said give me details. He simply said "I've sent the repo details, what else do you require?"
Dafuq? Dude, gimme some spice. Dafuq you done? Dafuq libraries you used? Dafuq APIs you used? Where Dafuq did you get this old ass checkout on which you've made these changes? AND DAFUQ IS THIS TOOL SUPPOSED TO DO AND HOW DOES IT AFFECT MY PRODUCT?
Anyway, since I didn't get a lot of info, I set about trying to just merge the code blindly and fix all conflicts, assuming that no new libraries/APIs have been used and the code is compatible with our master code base.
Enter delivery head. 2nd motherfucker.
This coont neither has technical knowledge nor the common sense to ask someone who knows his shit to help out with the technical stuff.
I find out that this was the half assed moron who agreed to a 3 day timeline (and our build takes around 13 hours to complete, end to end). Because fuck testing. They validated the their tool, we've tested our product. There's no way it can fail when we make a hybrid cocktail that will make the elephants foot look like a frikkin mojito!
Anywho, he comes by every half-mother fucking-hour and asks whether the build has been triggered.
Bitch. I have no clue what is going on and your people apparently don't have the time to give a fuck. How in the world do you expect me to finish this in 5 minutes?
Anyway, after I compile for the first time after merging, I see enough compilations to last a frikkin life time. I kid you not, I scrolled for a complete minute before reaching the last one.
Again, my assumption was that there are no library or dependency changes, neither did I know the fact that the dude implemented using completely different libraries altogether in some places.
Now I know it's my fault for not checking myself, but I was already having a bad day.
I then proceeded to have a little tantrum. In the middle of the floor, because I DIDN'T HAVE A CLUE WHAT CHANGES WERE MADE AND NOBODY CARED ENOUGH TO GIVE A FUCKING FUCK ABOUT THE DAMN FUCK.
Lo and behold, everyone's at my service now. I get all things clarified, takes around an hour and a half of my time (could have been done in 20 minutes had someone given me the complete info) to find out all I need to know and proceed to remove all compilation problems.
Hurrah. In my frustration, I forgot to push some changes, and because of some weird shit in our build framework, the build failed in Jenkins. Multiple times. Even though the exact same code was working on my local setup (cliche, I know).
In any case, it was sometime during sorting out this mess did I come to know that the reason why the 2nd motherfucker accepted the 3 day deadline was because the total bill being slapped to the customer is four fucking million USD.
Greed. Wow. The fucker just sacrificed everyone's day and night (his team and the next) for 4mil. And my manager and director agreed. Four fucking million dollars. I don't get to see a penny of it, I work for peanut shells, for 15 hours, you'll get bonuses and commissions, the fucking junior Dev earns more than me, but my manager says I'm the MVP of the team, all I get is a thanks and a bad rating for this hike cycle.
4mil usd, I learnt today, is enough to make you lick the smelly, hairy balls of a Neanderthal even though the money isn't truly yours.4
Why am I such an average ?
It's just a sad realisation. Nobody cares but I wanna send this out there, just to write thoughts.. I am 18 in 3rd year of high school (grammar school so nothing IT related, basically waste of time) and in IT I'm all self taught but I feel like I could be better if I just didn't [something]..
I feel like I wanna learn so many things but when I look at you, it seems like a common problem in the IT sphere so hey, average guy joining the club.
I also feel dumb when programming. I didn't manage to learn C++ in it's entirety because to really accomplish something, you've got so many ways to do it and finding the best one requires deep understanding of the tools you've got at your disposal with the language and I feel like I'm not capable of this(self learn, in school/Uni that's different story).. But many (most) of you are. I've tried many coding challenges and when I got it working, I just saw how someone did it in one line just by layering functions that I've never heard of..
Also, we've got kinda specific national competition here in many fields including IT for high schools.. And the winners always do sometimes like "AI driven Life simulation" or "Self flying drone made from ATMega from scratch with 3D simulation in C# to it" or "Game engine" or whatever shit and it's always from grammar schools and never IT related schools.. They are like me. Maybe someone helped them, I don't know, but they are just so far away from me while I'm here struggling to get the basic level of math for any kind of machine learning..
Yeah I've written Neural Network from scratch in C but meh, honestly it's pretty basic stuff .. I'd rather understand derivatives which we're going to learn next year and I'm too lazy to learn it from khan academy because I always learn something else.. Like processing (actually codetrain started teaching tensorflow so that might be the light for me...) Or VHDL (guys you can create your own chip / CPU from scratch and it's not even hard and OMFG it's so fucking cool , full adder done yay) or RPi or commodore 64 assembly or game development with Godot and just meh..
I mean, this sounds exactly like not knowing what to do and doing nothing in the end. That was me like 6-12 months ago. Now I'm managing to pick 2-3 things and focus them and actually feel the progress.
But I lost track of the original point.. I didn't do anything special, every time I'm programming something, everyone does it better and I feel dumb. I will probably never do anything special, everyone around says "He's still learning he's genius" but they have no idea.
I mean, have you seen one of the newest videos on Google's YouTube channel (I openly hate them, but I will keep that away for now), something like "Sarah story" ? It's about girl that apparently didn't care about IT but self learned tensorflow on high school. I think it may be bullshit (like ALL of their videos ) but it's probably just fancied, not complete lie.
And again, here I am. I now C but I'm incapable of learning to program good which most of you did and are now doing for living. I'm incapable to do anything cool, just understanding what everybody else did and replicating it. I'm incapable of being clever.
Sorry, just misusing devrant to vent a bit17
I've promised to do the Mozilla rant about the whole meritocracy thing a few days ago.. well, this is that. Along with some other stuff along the way. Haven't ranted for a couple of days man, shit happened! But losing 6 days that could've been spent on finishing my power supply project.. to a stupid cold, it got a little bit on my nerves, so that's what I've been working on for the time being. Hopefully I'll be able to finish it up in a couple of days.
1. COCKtail party thingy
Turns out that there's this conference in Brussels in a couple of days about the whole Article 13 copyright stuff. I've been letting a mail to the MEP's about it mature on my systems for a while now.. well, maturing or procrastinating, you be the judge 😛
Now I'm glad that I waited with that though. It's mostly a developer-centric insight into how the directive would be a horrible idea.. think AI, issues with context recognition, Tom Scott's video on Penistone and Scunthorpe etc etc. But maybe I can include some stuff from the event afterwards.
Also, if you're coming to the conference too, do let me know! Little devRant meet while we're at it, it'd be fucking great! I'll try to remember to bring my Christmas ducks, they've got these cute little Santa hats 😋
(P.S.: about the whole COCKtail, I saw the email while drunk and during registration I had to choose an email address.. I figured, feminazis are doing such a great job at going out of their way to find offense in everything, I figured that I'd make their job a little bit easier by sending a COCK bomb in my registration mail address, in the hopes that it finds its way to one of them.. evil, I know XD)
2. The whole feminazi stuff at Mozilla
So Mozilla hates meritocracy now? I've been wanting to rant about the big bad meritocracy for a while now. Thank you Mozilla for giving me an incentive to actually do it!
Meritocracy, feminazis think it's bad because it's about power relationships and discrimination, right? But what if I told you that that is exactly what makes great software great. Good code, good merit, is what's welcomed in software development.. or at least it should be. Because it's a job of fucking knowledge, experience, and quality! Also, meritocracy is a great thing because nobody cares if you're a professional developer in a suit, getting paid to work on a piece of OSS, or a homegamer neonazi who's coding shit in their underwear while wanking to child porn.. nobody fucking cares. If your code, your merit, is good, contribute ahead! Super inclusive, yet apparently bad because bad code is excluded to ensure the health of the project.
So what is the alternative to the big bad meritocracy? Inclusion (or as it's looked like in practice, more like exclusion) based on gender/sex, political orientation, things like that. But not actual fucking merit, the ability to write good code. How the fuck is politics and gender going to be any good at all to an inherently meritocratic craft?! Oh but yeah, it's great for inclusion. It's like females in tech. Artificial growth is just a matter of growth numbers and the only folks who like it are fucking HR and wanketeering cunts, and feminazis. Merit, that's what matters!! And have you ever considered that females are generally not interested in technology? Or for that matter, where's our inclusion movement for men in healthcare?! Gender equality my ass.
That's just my two cents on it of course. Meritocracy shouldn't be abandoned in tech. And even if it's just a matter of calling it something else. How the fuck is it a good idea to not call a pot a fucking pot just because someone might take offense at it?! It's meritocracy, call it fucking meritocracy!!! And while we're at it, call a master a fucking master and a slave a fucking slave!15
Whenever you feel sad just remember that when Microsoft Visual Studio App Center is down, just like StackOverflow, nobody cares...1
Recipe sites are the absolute aids.
Ad covered, half the time they feature some bullshit story nobody cares about, and it takes ages to scroll through them.
Fuck this is bad.29
Aaaaaaaand I'm back! I'm sure nobody cares but here you go enjoy this picture of the best cup on the planet.11
This is gonna be depressing. You have been warned.
I am getting sick of people, moreso than I usually would. It's getting to the point where I'm feeling like I want complete isolation from people. Why do people get pissed at me then not tell me what I did wrong? How the fuck am I supposed to fix it?
One of my friends, S, has a lot of issues, and I've been friends with her for many years. I try to help her as much as I can because I actually care, but she rarely responds to any texts and disappears for days at a time. Then she comes back and says I worry too much and plays it off like it was nothing. Wtf?!
I give everyone hugs. If you want a hug, you'll get one from me no questions asked. I do this because I'm actually incredibly depressed and the hugs help me feel less lonely. I'm getting tired of caring so much for everyone else and having nobody actually care about me. S says that I care so much BECAUSE I don't want anyone else to feel that way, but it hurts like hell when I'm the only one who cares.
I don't care what people think about me in a sense that if they have a problem, fuck off. I do, however care that nobody seems to actually CARE. I HATE THIS SHIT. I'm getting to that point where I don't want to die, I just don't want to exist like this. Fuck everything at this point. Nobody ever responds to texts, they get pissed for no reason, just fuck it.9
If Android phone has a bug and doesn’t receive fix: nobody cares
If iPhone has a bug and Apple fixes it after 2 days: WOLOLOLOLO, APPLE SUCKS! THE END OF APPLE IS NEAR!13
I changed "Bug" in TFS to "Monstrous Hideous Defect". That'll get the mindset right. The word bug is so common that nobody cares anymore. New Monstrous Hideous Defect? Holy crap, better fix that right away! 😃
JuniorDev ignores every advice, writes bad code and complains about other people not working because he does not see their result because he looks at the wrong places.
Okay, so I am really fed up right now.
We have this Junior Dev, who is now with us for circa 8 months, so ca. a year less than me. Our first job for both of us.
He is mostly doing stuff nobody in the team cares about because he is doing his own projects.
But now there's a project where we need to work with him. He got a small part and did implement that. Then parts of the main project got changed and he included stuff which was not there anymore. It was like this for weeks until someone needed to tell him to fix it.
His code is a huge mess (confirmed by senior dev and all the other people working at the project).
Another colleague and me mostly did (mostly) pair programming the past 1-2 weeks because we were fixing and improving (adding functionality) libraries which we are going to use in the project. Furthermore we discussed the overall structure and each of us built some proof-of-concept applications to check if some techniques would work like we planned it.
So in short: We did a lot of preparation to have the project cleaner and faster done in the next few weeks/months and to have our code base updated for the future. Plus there were a few things about technical problems which we need to solve which was already done in that time.
Side note: All of this was done not in the repository of the main project but of side projects, test projects and libraries.
Now it seems that this idiot complained at another coworker (in our team but another project) that we were sitting there for 2 weeks, just talking and that we made no progress in the project as we did not really commit much to the repository.
Side note: My colleague and me are talking in another language when working together and nobody else joins, as we have the same mother tongue, but we switch to the team language as soon as somebody joins, so that other colleague did not even know what we were talking about the whole day.
So, we are nearly the same level experience wise (the other colleague I work with has just one year more professional experience than me) and his work is confirmed to be a mess, ugly and totally bad structured, also not documented. Whereas our code is, at least most of it, there is always space for improvement, clean, readable and re-useable (confirmed by senior and other team members as well).
And this idiot who could implement his (far smaller part) so fast because he does not care about structure or any style convention, pattern or anything complains about us not doing our work.
I just hope, that after this project, I don't have to work with him again soon.
He is also one of those people who think that they know everything because he studied computer science (as everybody in the team, by the way). So he listens to nothing anybody explains to him, not even the senior. You have to explain everything multiple times (which is fine in general) and at some points he just says that he understood, although you can clearly see that he didn't really understand but just wants to go on coding his stuff.
So you explain him stuff and also explain why something does not work or is not a good thing, he just says "yes, okay", changes something completely different and moves on like he used to.
How do you cope with something like this?6
Wasn't even going to do this but here it is.
Meeting to start every single day. Every day I have said what is assigned is not possible in any way. Nobody listens or cares.
Fast forward a week, my team is deadlocked with an issue that cannot be fixed. Morning meeting kicks off, topic gets brought up by me and the immediate response is, "Why have you or anyone else been looking into that? We've known for weeks that is an issue."
I just realized one of today's emails is asking to review again that spaghetti program and this time figure out how to optimize performance because it is getting flagged for high cpu and database usage. A Niagra of If-statements and nobody-cares-for-comments-and-technical-documentation.
*bleep* *bleep* *bleep* previous programmer.
I'll deal with this torture on Monday.3
Sitting in a bus on 19 hour ride with my class to England a few things to rant about came to my mind:
Why the fuck do you have to blast shitty german rap music out of your fucking JBL boxes and why do you have to turn up the volume so much that I can still hear it although I am wearing headphones, listening to music and sitting 5 fucking rows in front of you.
Also why the fuck do clocks in buses never display the right time? How hard can it be to make the clock display the right fucking time?
Another thing: why does this bus which is especially made for long rides not have a fucking trash can?! Seriously wtf?
Rants aside I am really looking forward to staying in England for a week although I won't have a computer for the next week :(
Another thing: why the fuck is the coffee you get at pull-ins so fucking disgusting ?
Like srsly, it is made by a machine and still tastes like thrown-up.
And why the fuck does everyone look weirdly at you when you buy a can of red bull but everything is fine when someone my age drinks 3+ liters of beer and then throws up? What the fuck? People look at me weirdly when I tell them that I don't drink any alcohol, heck I am actually not even allowed to do so because I am 15 and not 16 (beer is allowed in Germany if you are 16+ but nobody really cares about that). Heck where I am from they even encourage you to drink beer? What the fuck??!!
Anyway looking forward to England and also sorry about the long non-dev related rant. Just had to rant about some people and society.
P.S. do you know any (preferably free) Android apps / games where you have to code or just solve problems with logic?14
If you're on a mobile development team, you are treated special when you're the iOS guy. Nobody here damn cares about Android.6
Our team - if ever existed - is falling apart. Pressure raising. Release deadline probably failing. No release ready for Big Sur.
Almost seemed we were getting somewhere: More focus on code quality, unit tests, proper design, smaller classes. But somehow we now ended up in "microservice" hell; a gazillion classes, mostly tested in isolation, but together they just fail to do their job. A cheap and dirty proof of concept from March is still more capable than this pile. I really start to doubt all that "Clean code", TDD, Agility rhetorics. What does it help you, if nobody cares for the end result? It's like a month I try to hammer down that message: we have to have testable artifacts, we have to ensure code signing works, our artifact is packaged and installable, we have to give QA something they can test - but time just passes and this piece of shit software is still being killed or does nothing.
Now my knee is broken and can do no sports and are tied to my chair even more. To top it all my coffee machine broke and my internet connection was abysmal this week. Not the usual small disconnects, after which it would recover, but more annoying and enduring: often being throttled to 1.7 MB/s (ranking my connection in the slowest 7% even in Germany). My RDP sessions had compression artifacts all over the screen and a mouse click would only take effect 5 sec later.
But my Esspresso machine was just repaired. Not all hope is lost.7
So apparently some major vpn connection providers got compromised some time ago.
adding the fact that major enterprise vpn network providers had security flaws earlier this year
Sums up what was the major topic in security this year.
At the end I see something like cloud act that allows wiretapping anyone.
And when we multiply this by number of companies that have services in cloud that sums up privacy these days.
Well... instead of imposter syndrome I think I have something more alike "I can't fucking tell if I'm smarter than everyone around me or if I'm so dumb I have no clue what's going on"-syndrome.
And trying to be rational, I usually consider the second option to be more probabile... right?
Or maybe, the way my brain processes things is just so different from the people I know that It creates a layer of incomunicability, so that others can't understand my reasoning as much as I can't understand theirs.
The usual speaking-through-jargon-all-the-time trend I've encountered is also not helping.
So I strive daily to align myself to what's going on, trying not to slow anybody down, but that drains my mental energies so much I end up getting done so little... and then I realize _everybody_ has done a similar amount of work.
Are maybe my standards too high?
Or it's normal for teamwork to slow everybody down THIS much?
I used to work much better alone, or in teams with proper separation of tasks between people. Like - we agree on a common interface and then everybody goes his own way implementing his part, and as long as the contract is respected and nothing breaks, nobody cares about what's inside the boxes.
But I don't see it coming again anytime soon, and people seem to have an averagely-good opinion of my work. So well, if I get paid and things cruise along fine, there should be nothing to complain about.
Shit, I've let my flow of consciousness out.2
I just don't get the WordPress hate or CMS hate in general. Using these is not perfect, but neither is _anyone's_ code. Get over that and be more productive for your client. Unless you're the best coder the world has ever seen, and you're _always_ available to push content for an organization of 90 or 900 or 9,000 people, nobody CARES about your "coding purity". They want a website that they can still operate if your ass gets hit by a bus. Don't like WP? Find a CMS that ticks most of the boxes for your client's needs. If you have the time, budget, and long-term inclination to provide bug fixes for it, write your own Awesomesauce Custom CMS(TM) and release it to the open source community so we can finally replace WordPress with the next best thing.
Otherwise, launch site, get check. Repeat until you can retire.10
Sometimes I really feel humiliated in my lab.
We have several presentation/discussion groups in my lab that meet once a week or so where members present their progress reports. Generally people in my lab are not so enthusiastic about them. Which is okay, I also don't like doing presentations, but you know, you have to improve somehow and get feedback somehow.
So I've been in a really passive group for a while and I decide to join this other group since they seem to have good discussions, but nope fuck me.
The first time I present, the professor doesn't show up since he has some meeting, so obviously nobody cares to show up. And I'm there presenting for a guy who is half comatose. Alright, I guess that's the price for joining a new team, it's gonna get better next time.
Second time. Spent all night to prepare my presentation and been training my model for two weeks. I am actually really happy with the results of my networks. But the enjoyment of showing some good results, I shall not have.
Meeting leader doesn't show up. Two guys who should present don't show up. Professor doesn't show up. A different professor substitutes him and has no idea what I am talking about and asks stupid questions that don't really have an answer. Fuck me, I'm so angry, this shit is a waste of time. If you don't show up, care to fucking send an email or a message on slack, but guess you're too fucking retarded to even do that.
I'm so done with this. I've gotten better feedback from reddit, than what I've cumulatively gotten from my laboratory. I'm a moment away from walking up to the meeting leader and telling him that the meetings are stupid and a waste of time. Don't get me wrong, my professor is really nice and knowledgeable, but he fails to see that some people in the laboratory are shit.
What do I do? How do I deal with these people? Right now they're planning a trip! Why are you planning a trip? WHAT ARE YOU REWARDING YOURSELVES FOR? YOU HAVE DONE NOTHING IN WEEKS? omfg3
Because the client had me roasting on a spit in nearly impossible features Hell for an entire year on a piece of custom software that ate up all the budget and my profitability, I completely forgot about a major other requirement that now will take me months to integrate. And they still haven't paid me for my other work so I can pay my other dev. My vendor/client negotiating "prowess" got me from "still not paid" to "indentured servitude".
FML. How did I convince myself that I'm good at business relationships?Why did I think I would be able to do custom software? I need to stick to just designing websites as a rank and file employee. No, actually I need to disappear until North Korea starts thermonuclear war and nobody cares about software anymore.
Fucking EA Games and their fucking shit mailing system!!
All the sudden they start spamming me emails about their shit games nobody fucking cares about. I proceed to inspect the footer to find an 'unsubscribe' link and there was none, just a 'manage my preferences' link.
So I went there. After waiting a whole minute for a simple page to load (wtf) there is a checkbox saying 'yes please spam my inbox with EA's latest news about their shit games nobody cares about' and it was UNCHECKED.
So I leave it unchecked and click update (thinking it might actually unsubscribe me from this crap) BUT NO! I receive another email saying 'thank you, you stupid moron you just subscribed to our shit and will now receive even more of our useless email about how different the new NFS is and how rubbish the new Star wars game is...
First job while in college... Was working for web dev team lamp set up before lamp was lamp (year was 2000).
Had deadline one week after summer vacation. Worked non stop a couple of days to get shit done and didn't make it. Got in a conflict with my manager in front of the team and I blew my steam off. Quit on the spot.
1. Don't be a fucking idiot when estimating work.
2. Be cool with other teammates, nobody cares about drama and nobody has to feel sorry for you.
3. Uhm, plan? Had entire fucking vacation to get work done. I was a fucking moron.
4. Burning out is stupid and unproductive.
5. Your manager can be as poor in management as you are. Your job is to try to make them better at it, as they have less visibility in the details.
Next job in grad school. Worked for a security company. Direct manager had the bright idea to make execs sign the change requests. WTF. Code was in Perl/php, a mess. Team rewrote back end DB access , taking over six months, or more, failing twice the deadline. After a final 48 hour burn out, we ship and get laid off the week after.
1. Don't work for dicks.
2. Don't be a dick yourself.
3. Don't work for dicks.
Third job was in silicon valley. It was a great company, and I stayed there for five years.
My company never used unit tests. And i would love to educate but i do not know how to unit test properly. I always en up with: if i want to properly test all ins and outs of this class's + operator. I need to add checks for positive number, negative numbers, nan, infinites, nulls etc. Etc. It needs so many tests for something so stupidly simple, that i don't see a way to motivate people to use it.
Am i missing something? Is there a guideline for "ok coverage"? Is testing just that much work and is that why nobody cares until it is too late?
I have been reading a book about working with legacy code. But still i got no answers. Halp!7
Designer: The web design muset be beautiful, clean and follow modern trends.
Me: Actualy no, design should be just functional part of website. There is no need to be beautiful, clean and has nothing to do with modern graphic trends. Sad truth is almost nobody, besides css galleries, cares.
Finding a bug that wont trigger an error but will deliver incorrect results, but only in certain circumstances and has only come apparent after the site has bern live for 6 months.
You turn in to a detective trying to determine what triggered the wrong result, what the client changed/added/edited in the cms and work from there.
After much investigation it dawns on you, you then find the bit responsible in your shit code and fix it.
Then feel extremely elated at how cool you are, but no-one gives a shit.
Back to work.
That’s why I play bass guitar, do some cool licks on stage and its instant gratification, glad I have that... and devRant community.
maybe I should learn how to code properly as well.1
So my team started creating an in-house wiki for all information about our products, methods, scrum, documentation etc. From the beginning we had settled on doing everything in English instead of native language just in case we get a foreign student intern or simply a foreign employee... And now it looks to me that nobody but my team leader and I care about it: half of the documents are either fully native (especially from other part of the team who work on a different project, they have probably never gotten the memo of language choice to start with) or the documents are in some weird-ass combination of English-native which is even worse imo.
I really don't understand why my own team doesn't adhere to the decision though: we're all at least reasonably educated and our country focuses heavily on using English as second language so that should be no big barrier. And why would you want inconsistent documents/code?!
And this is not the first time people don't stick to what is decided for things like formats and language... Getting a bit tired of it tbh...5
"I'll buy the new iPhone because of its RAM"
"What amazes me of my new iPhone is its wonderful processor"
"I bought my iPhone because it let me free to do whatever I want"
- nobody, never
Seriously, have you ever seen someone saying that? Why the hell we nerd post things about how much is technically poorer an iPhone if compared with other phones when actually nobody cares about this? Come on, I'd never buy an iPhone as well, but I don't think this is the best way to change the other people' mind, I'm pretty sure that will increase the popularity instead.6
I have been thinking a lot recently about building a portable server. Like a powerful machine that you could carry around and it would work for a reasonable amount of time without a power plug. Maybe use it for hacking, brute forcing, just mobile number crunching or external rendering machine. The specs for this are over the top, but here's a rough sketch:
2 Xeons and a MoBo that fits them
A 1080ti or maybe even an SLI
14TB hard drives
You get what I mean.
After that get a case and a PSU which suit the thing and you have a powerful machine.
To make a crude portability thing you can get a car battery and an inverter and strap it on there.
After thinking about all this the total cost came to around 7000 EUR and the weight of about 15kg. Someone with a strong back could carry it without an issue.
What I really find strange is that nobody has ever came up with anything similar, like I've never seen anything like this.
Velocity? You want to talk about velocity while it is you steerig us towards full speed reverse over and over again?
What's faster, armageddon or the apocalypse?
NOBODY FUCKING CARES MATE 🤦♂️3
The toolchain is just horrible. fpc, fp-compiler, lazarus...
Even in repos 3.0.0 is not the latest one. Like who the fucking cares about improving this language, please think of people who don't give a shit and freeze it already
language is slow
language is horribly verbose
language is CRYPTIC to debug
nobody sain would ever want to learn this language
10 years ago as a student I would pit on lazarus
today I still pit on it
now about lazarus...
The IHM is one of the most shittiest interface we could ever dream of.
Even gimp does it better
you get to download fucking Mbs for a condensated pack of windows all over the places
Okay, so we've learned nothing new.
A degree is a useless waste of time and nobody cares about it.
Said by someone who's currently in school, and will learn the basics of the stuff I'm currently doing day to day in about roughly three years.2
Why the hell does NOBODY, including Apple, figure out, how USB-C is supposed to work? I'm tired of shifty half-assed implementations with some having no USB 3.1 (Apple), some not supporting current DisplayPort standards (Apple, Dell) or limiting the speed to USB2.0... *GAAAAH*
Future seems to suck pretty hard.3
So as usual I received some call from telemarketer and I started from other perspective this time.
I asked how I can be sure that the person on the other side is telling the truth.
That pissed the telemarketer that started challenging me by reading my company data but I calmly responded that it doesn’t proof anything cause I don’t know anything about you - the person who are calling me.
I know who I am but how I can trust who you are ? You just provided me your name that I don’t know it’s true cause I have no methods to verify that.
That pissed telemarketer so much.
Some time ago before you put money in bank you know the banker. If someone was stealing this money you probably know from your police who is it and where he’s probably hiding.
The future we’re trying to go right now with this machine stuff that makes job for us is completely different.
We’re more and more separated from reality that is our planet dying. More and more animals and plants are dying, nobody cares about it.
Despite me working a lot with new tech I am more and more sceptic of how technology is shaping us. We sooner or later wont be able to shit without computer ( lots of us is probably already there bringing cellphones as companions for good nice shit rolling ).
Is it the future we want ?
The future where you need to beat computer to have contact with nice people. Cause I see it everywhere now. The technology is stupid and not perfect so lots of us is forced to align to this crap right now. Use the technology and beat the algorithms to connect with human. That’s the future we want ? Really ?
Some idiotic algorithms that are trying to tell us that this is what you need to watch ? This is what you need to eat ?
This is where you need to be ?
Take our time and turn it to view count slash likes and subscribes shit hole ?
The technology power show that everyone wants to buy but you won’t even use 10% of it’s capabilities cause it’s blocked by company that sells it ?
I’m more and more disappointed by this world.
Anyway Telemarketer didn’t want to admit that is alien robot who is trying to kill humans by selling me this machine so I hanged up cause I had nothing more interesting to say.
I think they will finally stop calling me.2
In our class we have one subject where we take notes on one shared Google docs document. To be honest, this may be the worst "teamwork" that I every had to deal with.
• Simply copying the stuff from the blackboard:
• Missing context
• document consists of keywords and occasional sentences
• These fucking deep nested lists
• No quality control whatsoever
--> nobody fucking cares
• What, nobody made notes for this point?
• Any attempt to speak up result in me being scolded
• Be me, the only one not shopping on amazon instead of taking notes
• Wtf does this mean, where's the context
• one line of code without needed context code
No quality, no Motivation, no better alternatives, no fun.
"I want everything we do to be beautiful. I don’t give a damn whether the client understands that that’s worth anything, or that the client thinks it’s worth anything, or whether it is worth anything. It’s worth it to me. It’s the way I want to live my life. I want to make beautiful things, even if nobody cares. " - Saul Bass2
When somebody speaks about "rewriting everything from scratch" I always mention some famous articles claiming: "don't do it!" "big mistake".
Truth is that when somebody says "rewrite everything from scratch" he doesn't mean "everything". He just means "rewrite the 2-3 things that we found useful after 10 years of developing useless features nobody cares about"
So then, yes, rewrite, please1
Working with QA department (QA for company processes, not IT) on creating a change history list in SharePoint. Name, fields, etc, simple stuff and all working fine for the past two days.
Today I get a request to change the name of the list because its the same name as another list on a separate SharePoint site (used exactly the same way).
Me: "I can, but no one really cares about the list name. Besides, it serves the same functionality as the XYZ site, so the same name would be consistent."
QAMgr1: "Go ahead and rename the list if its easy."
QAMgr2: "Agree! We already have that list in the XYZ system, we do not need to confuse people."
NOBODY IS GOING TO BE CONFUSED!
I would never, ever want to hear this from someone if there is a blunt object within my reach.
User: “I drove the forklift off the dock because I was confused by the SharePoint list name. Sorry.”
I had this song stuck in my head the whole fucking day today. And I really, really *REALLY* wanted to listen to it. Once. Without any distractions or breaks. While working. And focusing on work. Matching the tempo of the song to My work rhythm.
SO WHY THE FUCK COULD PEOPLE NOT WAIT FOR 4 MINUTES AND 35 SECONDS AND ****CHOOSE**** TO IGNORE EARPHONES, A BLACK HOODIE COVERING MY ENTIRE FUCKING FACE AND THE LACK OF RESPONSES WHEN YOU CALLED THE FIRST 2 TIMES????????????????
Worst part? It was JUST THAT ONE SONG WHILE WORKING. OTHER TIMES, NOBODY CARES I EVEN FUCKING EXIST!1
Me. I'm not even in an actual job, I ditched my biggest (but small) project, then I moved onto another idea and it's fine, but I still can't be bothered to fix the larger (even though nobody cares about it) thing.
Even worse? Gudishvibes won't update to the newer version of the library, and won't make the changes needed to do so.
Tut tut, so unprofessional.
Watched UFO 2018.
Movie mostly about guy trying to solve math problem but nice.
Learned about fine-structure constant and that all base SI units were redefined in 2019 lol.
I don’t remember anyone mentioned that scientists changed all of standardized measurements.
Overall nice movie if you like those about solving imaginary problem without special effects etc...
Looks like nobody cares how much kilogram weights.7
You can build an entire solution which takes days/weeks, nobody cares. You miss a full-strength in the copy, clients lose their minds!