Long story short, one of our interns got this present from me hehe. He loved it.

She: Uuggrrr.. You did it again
Me: What
She: Stop opening the dev tools
Me: Oh sorry
She: Leave me alone with your laptop.

10 min later

Me: What did you change?
She: I tried to remove the dev tools by changing the dragged position to a negative value in chromes config files.
Me: wow.
She: Didn't work.
Me: Hehe, nice try though

*opens chrome*
Me: wut.
She: *chuckles*

- Light pink theme
- 500% zoom
- Font size changed
- Some virus search engine (my search?)
- deleted some plugins
- start page randomcolour.org (or color? (<- me css freak))

Hehe right on point....glad I managed to take a screenshot :P

Hehe!😂😂

a trashcan at our school

How do I get into my ultimate coding zone...? I turn on my computer. :) Hehe..

!rant

You know those dudes that dress up spiffy and try to sell you cable providers for tv and shit. Well, i normally stream everything from my computers and do not really have any need for actual tv, my flatscreen is mostly used for my ps4 or switch and das it.

So these guys stop me at walmart and start trying to sell me this provider, i normally listen and give everyone a chance since they b only doing their job. Afterwards I tell them that i use one of those roku or amazon sticks and that I am fine with it. Well one of them insists in that those are not good since **fake made up technical shit** and that unless I am a programmer I would not know how to work around them.

I smile. Hehe.....hehe.....muahahahaha and tell them that I do not worry about such things since I am a software engineer. My wife passes by and confirms "yup, computer scientist, spends his days thinkering with shit"

One of them looks at the other and says "fuck it dude we lost"

Lol, gracious in the face of defeat.

Hehe, stumbled upon an oldie :-)

struct ComputerContractor
{
double salary;
long lunches;
float jobs;
char unstable;
void work;
int hiring_him_again;
const pain_in_the_arse;
unsigned agreement;
short fuse;
volatile personality;
static progress;
};
/* and there are no unions in sight */

NFF = Not Funny Friend.

NFF: what is your smart phone?
ME: OnePlus 3
NFF: Oh you have 4 !
ME: hehe, yeah. I am thinking to buy the new OnePlus 5.
NFF: you're gonna to buy 6?? wow
ME: Ok stoop

Hehe.. that's a good idea

So my school forced everyone to buy a Chromebook G4 Education Edition which came with ChromeOS and we had to sign some shady e-policy. Days after I got it, I opened it up and manually reflashed the BIOS so I could use SeaBIOS and install Arch Linux.

Great, so I went on to instal Chrome and it was really slow and performance heavy, then I installed the new Firefox and it ran a lot faster...

*So hehe, Firefox works better than Chrome on a Chromebook!*

I'm not going to be the guy to ruin this moment...

Mine and @CozyPlanes hobby, it really helps you take your mind off programming and it's "quirks" hehe

Answer from 3rd party software company: "we can't fix these bugs because it requires development on our side".. hehe, yeah, no shit 😂

Hehe, just inherited a bit of JavaScript code. Ashamed to say I physically lol'd a little :) Guess I have an easy "bug" to fix.

Eh ehe hehe he eh ehehe

On top of burnout, codebase issues, spec issues, burnout, the product butt that keeps on crapping, burnout, burnout, loathing for my employer... My local Apple SSL cert expired. I can’t finish this and push it anywhere for testing. I can’t even run my own specs anymore. And I don’t have permissions to make a new one. I can’t do anything at all.

Ehe he hehe

Deadline is in two days, and I’m just sitting here laughing quietly to myself. I might finally be going crazy

I found a loose bit of tangle, started to pull, and the world decided it was time to fall apart. Reality said it’s time to go. And I wasn’t even a good screwdriver dev. Byeee ~

Well..hehe..

Funny error messages in a function I wrote long ago. Hehe

2022 Dec
Everyone: hehe, ChatGPT is soo cool, it responds to me and even knows what's the capital of France is! It is really cool!!!

2023 Jun [6 months later]
Everyone: hehe, ChatGPT is SOOOO stupid! I asked it to write a microkernel with native HTTP and TLS support and it made a semantic mistake in line 98823 lolz what a PoS

Hey there :)
Just downloaded the app and already love the community. Hehe ^^

Hehe..

```We discovered that your app contains hidden features. Attempting to hide features, functionality or content in your app is considered egregious behavior and can lead to removal from the Apple Developer Program.```
- Apple App Store Publishing Team

.

ARE U FU KINV KIDDING ME

THAT IS THE COMPLETE REASON WHY YOU REJECTED MY APP?

THE SAME GODDAMN BUILD THAT WAS SUBMITTED ON GOOGLE PLAY FOR ANDROID GOT APPROVED IN 10 MINUTES

IS THE SAME BUILD VERSION THAT GOT REJECTED 3 DAYS AFTER REVIEW ON THE APP STORE

BECAUSE "THEY THINK" I HAVE HIDDEN FEATURES LOL WHAT ARE FU🤡🤡KING INSANE🤡 YO😂😂🤡🤡

THIS REJECTION REASON IS LIKE A SHITTY USER REVIEW

"omg baby girl this app is best" *1 star"

OR

"I have a crash pls fix its not work this app cz crashs n not fixes fck u developers fix it these prblms !!!!🍆🍆🍆👅👅👅💦💦💦💨🌬🌬🌬" *1 star*

AND GET THIS RN !!!!

RN !!!!!!

THEY EVEN *THREAT ME* TO BAN MY APPLE DEVELOPER PROGRAM ACCOUNT WHICH I. P A I D. F O R. $ 100 USD

BECAUSE MY APP HaS 'HIDDEN FEATURES'

THERE ARE NOOO9OO FI KING HIDDEN FEATURES U MTHHHFRRFKERSS I WILL CUMBLAST ALL OF UR APPLE HOLES INTO UR ASSHOLES AND GIVE BIRTH TO THE MAGGOTS🤡GROWING FROM WITHIN🤡UR FKIG ASSHOLE CZ ALL OF YALL R FKIN ASSHOLES🤡ANYWAY🤡THEN MY FKIG HOT CUM🤡WILL EXPLODE💦OUT OF YOUR🤡ASS AND U WILL BE CLOWNS FOREBER🤡I WORKED WAY TOO HARD TO DESERVE AN UNNECESSARY REJECTION THAT HAS A VAGUE REASON OF WHY IT WAS REJSCTED🤡🤡🤡

juuuuuuu

🤡hehe

Peopleee of devRant!
It's been a year, I missed the date

I got to know lots of people, it has been an interesting year... certainly
Thanks anyways
To every ++er, to the people I now call my friends

I'm still a student at uni, still bad at stuff, still an embarrassing mess, it is best to not mind me hehe

A couple of months back we were discussing sh with a third party vendor for a very large ass fuck system that another department uses. I had been called into the meeting because the entire I.T department counts on me to at least act as an assessor to the many issues that other departments might have.

the department for which i was working with manages the databases that our institution uses, and in this particular question the DBA (my best friend mind you) was part of the meeting.

Mind you, issues that the third party vendor were having were all fixed by our DBA, and he had documented and mentioned these items to me as I provided assistance to him through the 3 weeks prior to this meetings. Once such case was that we needed a transitioning as well as intermediary system for some processes to happen from one DB to the other and a lot of other technical babble. Well, the DBA used to be an excellent (fuck you) VB developer who recently re-learned the language into .net. He had shown me many of his old programs and even by the limitations of the language they were elegant and fascinating. They really are and ya'll devrant fam know that I ain't one to hate on tech at all.

When the DBA explained how he went around some of the issues by generating programs that could assist him, he mentioned the tech stack, I had coached him into knowing that being descriptive about the tools he used would be beneficial to everyone else. While he mentioned VB.NET the vendor snickered and my boy got quiet.

Then I broke the silence, fuck you. "what was that?" and the dude said "nothing, sorry"
So I said "no no, I want to know, I am not going past this point until you, the dude getting paid over $100 an hour for something YOU couldn't fix explain to me the little hehe moment you had"

The mfker went silent. then explained how he was aware that people were moving past vb.net and shit like that, me "imagine that, someone used a tech stack that your ignorance thought obsolete to fix something you could not solve, even though we are paying you for it, were it me or in my hands, and mind you i have direct access to the VP so this foolishness might change, I would have cut you and your little sect loose months ago, I have no patience, or appreciation from leeches like you or the rest of the "professionals" that work for your company or other similar entities, much less, as you can see, my patience runs even less when you people snicker at the solutions that our staff has to take when you all slack"

The entire meeting was uncomfortable as high heaven.

Fuck you, if someone I know manages to run shit on fucking liberty basic then so fucking be it. I will slap you 10 fucking times over, and then fuck your girl, if you try to put someone else down for the tech stacks you use.

I hate neck beards, BUT I hate fake ass neckbeards ever more

*Colin Farrell in true detective mode: FUCK....YOU

Hehe....Real life example

Soo many java script hate posts! Not one post goes by where i thank god that I'm not a front end developer!

PS - I let my intern work on the the UI of my application :P He is on devrant. I hope he sees this! Hehe.

Online applications are so much worse than the classic snail mail ones, because some companies just don't seem to give a single fuck about the quality of their application application (hehe).

This results in such joyous things like:

• "Allowed file types: doc, docx, pdf, jpg, zip"
• "Max filesize 3mb"
• "One of your files does not meet the requirements" (doesn't tell you which)
• "Upload timed out, please try again"
• 403 forbidden
• "Your account does not have the necessary permissions to upload more than 4 files at once"
• clicking the submit button leads to a 404
• "Please explain why you want to work for us." 500 character limit
• Google forms

So Twitter got afraid? Better safe than sorry hehe!🤣

Writing a list of censored words is fun!
Hehe

Writing a custom PDF parser from scratch. Hehe fuuuuuuck me

+2, +4, +8, +16, +32, +64, +128...

Hehe... That's so cool. (:

!rant (kind of)

I have the bad habit of suggesting "awesome" and "cool" features for projects and stuffs.. (Mostly just for fun and won't give a lot of value to the project, but would be cool). The less fun side.. I'm the only developer (in most cases..)

Me: Hey, wouldn't it be cool if the user could do this or that, or if this was implemented etc.. ?

Boss/Leader: Oh, hehe yeah, hmm.. *thinking* [a bit later] .. You're right, go ahead, implement that feature..

Me: .. Damnit..

But hey, on the bright side.. It's an extra feature! :D

!rant

I get asked about being able to hack stuff, like cracking wifi passwords. Mostly I just go along with them and make up some stuff about how you _could_ do it. And explain how it is done, throw in some "yeah its tough"s and words they wont understand. Yeah with a dictionary attack and a powerful CPU with many threads you can definitely do it! You should try it! I say. Convincing them they can. Ofcourse, download kain and abel and look for something like aircrackng on google.

They won't amount to much and probably won't even try it, but I have a laugh. Seeing the hope of hacking and cracking fade away as a child's ice cream melting on a hot summer day.

Hehe

dang, he's good. hehe

I called it "Microsoft S.Q.L" but Bobby argued it's Sequel not S.Q.L then I asked Bobby "PostgreSQL" and also he said "Postgre Sequel". Hehe sequel my ass then cus I'm sticking with my abbreviation.

Regarding Article 13 (or 17 or wherever it moved to now)… Let's say that the UK politicians decide to be dicks and approve the law. After that, we need to get it engineered in, right? Let's talk a bit about how.. well, I'd maybe go over it. Been thinking about it a bit in the shower earlier, so.. yeah.

So, fancy image recognition or text recognition from articles scattered all over the internet, I think we can all agree.. that's infeasible. Even more so, during this lobby with GitHub and OpenForum Europe, guy from GitHub actually made a very valid point. Now for starters, copyright infringement isn't an issue on the platform GitHub that pretty much breathes collaboration. But in the case of I-Boot for example, that thing from Apple that got leaked earlier. If that would get preemptively blocked.. well there's no public source code for it to get compared against to begin with, right? So it's not just "scattered all over the internet, good luck crawling it", it's nowhere to be found *at all*.

So content filtering.. yeah. Nope, ain't gonna happen. Keep trying with that, EU politicians.

But let's say that I am a content creator who hates the cancer of joke/meme because more often than not it manifests itself as a clone of r/programmerhumor.. someone decides to freeboot my content. So I go out, look for it, find it. Facebook and the likes, make it easier to find it in the first place, you dicks. It's extremely hard to find your content there.

So Facebook implements a way to find that content a bit easier maybe. Me being the content creator finds it.. oh blimey! It can't be.. it's the king of freebooting on Facebook, SoFlo! Who would've thought?! So at that point.. I'd like to get it removed of course. Report it as copyright infringement? Of course. Again Facebook you dicks, don't make it so tedious to fill in that bloody report. And look into it quickly! The videos those SoFlo dicks post is only relevant in the first 48h or so. That's where they make the most money. So act more quickly.

So the report is filled, video's taken down.. what else? Maybe temporarily make them unable to post as a bit of a punishment so that they won't do it again? And put in a limit to the amount of reports they can receive. Finally, maybe reroute the revenue stream to the original content creator instead. That way stolen content suddenly becomes free exposure! Awesome!

*suddenly realizes that I've been talking about the YouTube copyright strike system all along*

… Well.. maybe something like that then? That shouldn't be too hard to implement, and on YouTube at least it seems to be quite effective. Just imagine SoFlo and the likes that are repeat offenders, every 3 posts they get their account and page shut down. Good luck growing an audience that way. And good luck making new accounts all the time to start with.. account verification technology is pretty good these days. Speaking of experience here, tried bypassing Facebook's signup hoops a fair bit and learned a bit about some of the things they have red flags on, hehe.

But yeah, something like that maybe for social media in general. And.. let's face it, the biggest one that would get hurt by something like this would be Facebook. And personally I think it's about time for that bastard company to get a couple of blows already.

What are your thoughts on this?

++ Hehe ++

I always thought i could use some extra hours a day, but 40 seems a little excessive...

This is also the first time i encountered such a bug in the wild, and i'm way more excited than i should be, hehe.

Hehe...

soooo… Thing is, I'm really dying to try out that avatar editor since y'all have such cute alter-egos here. Can't wait hehe <3

I'm tracking your searches on devRant-Stats! hehe 😈

Black theme is great for my AMOLED screen, hehe

Didn’t want people staring at a random coding problem so I converted the board to something relevant to the event hehe

balancing school work between life and sport and programming is so hard. i mean, school is complete bs. what’s the point?

ffs it’s not *just* that im never gonna use the shit im taught, but that if it dont learn it, im punished. even in some classes (code.org), information that we’re taught is blatantly incorrect. either way, being able to find the foci or an ellipse and the latus rectum (hehe) of a hyperbola isnt going to make it easier when i get my job and just adjust css to my bosses’s specifications. i maintain a 4.0, and i fucking hate it. my friends are working hard, and getting into mit for racial diversity, while im doing just as much work, for what?

i want out. i really do. but this redundant thing called a degree is holding me back. i really want to have some way of proving my skills without a degree. i’m currently building a social media application i believe will take off, but frankly, i dont care.

take off or not, hopefully it will be enough to prove my skills. i’ve been working on this for two weeks now, and, well, that’s my story.

Throwback to the time I got called out by my boss in a meeting in front of the client for using too specific vocabulary like CRUD with them, immediately asked the client if they were familiar with it, they were, and boss didn't comment about it further. He ended up being the odd one out hehe jewel in my memories.

hehe..

Oh god, so many... I'll list my top two then, just because I can't decide which one was actually better. (:

One of my work colleagues left to go to Cape Town, so we filled his Corsa sedan with helium balloons and wrapped his car with clingwrap. :D The good sport that he was, he still climbed in and drove forwards about 2m with all the balloons. Lol.

Then for my boss's birthday, we wrapped literally everything on and around his desk in newspaper. His phone, monitor (secondary for a laptop), his shelves, everything on the shelves, etc. Took him a few hours before he could get back to work stuff after that, and some things still stayed wrapped for a few months... If I can find the photos from this I'll share them.

Ah, we have so much fun here... Hehe.

Already have it.
CNC operator.
I wanted to be cnc programmer but for now I'll have to work with the machines.
And I love it...
Making steel pieces with a 0.01mm precision...
Preparing the tools...
Operating the machine...
That's why I'm doing my own... For over 3 years (no money to finish yet hehe).
Also, got unemployed so I made a 3D drawing formation.
Now I can design, program and machine a full mold.
To bad company owners in my country (Portugal) like slave work... And I'm not accepting jobs for the minimum wage or I would be employed already.

Holy shit firefox, 3 retarded problems in the last 24h and I haven't fixed any of them.
My project: an infinite scrolling website that loads data from an external API (CORS hehe). All Chromium browsers of course work perfectly fine. But firefox wants to be special...
(tested on 2 different devices)
(Terminology: CORS: a request to a resource that isn't on the current websites domain, like any external API)

1.
For the infinite scrolling to work new html elements have to be silently appended to the end of the page and removed from the beginning. Which works great in all browsers. BUT IF YOU HAPPEN TO BE SCROLLING DURING THE APPENDING & REMOVING FIREFOX TELEPORTS YOU RANDOMLY TO THE END OR START OF PAGE!
Guess I'll just debug it and see what's happening step by step. Oh how wrong I was. First, the problem can't be reproduced when debugging FUCK! But I notice something else very disturbing...

2.
The Inspector view (hierarchical display of all html elements on the page) ISN'T SHOWING THE TRUE STATE OF THE DOM! ELEMENTS THAT HAVE JUST BEEN ADDED AREN'T SHOWING UP AND ELEMENT THAT WERE JUST REMOVED ARE STILL VISIBLE! WTF????? You have to do some black magic fuckery just to get firefox to update the list of DOM elements. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO DEBUG MY WEBSITE ON FIREFOX IF IT'S SHOWING ME PLAIN WRONG DATA???!!!!

3.
During all of this I just randomly decided to open my website in private (incognito) mode in firefox. Huh what's that? Why isn't anything loading and error are thrown left and right? Let's just look at the console. AND IT'S A FUCKING CORS ERROR! FUCK ME! Also a small warning says some URLs have been "blocked because content blocking is enabled." Content Blocking? What is that? Well it appears to be a supper special supper privacy mode by firefox (turned on automatically in private mode), THAT BLOCKS ALL CORS REQUESTS, THAT MAY OR MAY NOT DO SOME TRACKING. AN API THAT 100% CORS COMPLIANT CAN'T BE USED IN FIREFOXs PRIVATE MODE! HOW IS THE END USER SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT??? AND OF COURSE THE THROWN EXCEPTION JUST SAYS "NETWORK ERROR". HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO TELL THE USER THAT FIREFOX HAS A FEAUTRE THAT BREAKS THE VERY BASIS OF MY WEBSITE???

WHY CAN'T YOU JUST BE NORMAL FIREFOX??????????????????

I actually managed to come up with fix for 1. that works like < 50% of the time -_-

Hehe :p

Kotlin and mother tongue

In my mother tongue (my first language which is Kikuyu) we do not have the letter L in our alphabet thus meaning L and R to us is similar thus pronounced the same.
Then Kotlin makes life hard for devs who got a mother influence in their speech from my tribe. Was having a talk with fellow dev who is my tribe mate and we had an issue agreeing between val and var hehe.
We had to write it down to tell which is which.

Thankyou Kotlin for making my day.

Not by me, but by my friend
He write a shell command to alias 'cd' into 'rm -rf' and then print out 'hehe', then save the command to bash_profile

Me? I put that command to our engineer's slack channel and wait for a natural selection does its job

it's that time period of my devRant account when the USSR falls apart hehe

Exactly my point regarding rust. Marvel was found by jestdottehh btw. I'm sure this one wasn't posted or well known yet

Support the kitchen sink

Hehe now a devrant++ guy, because it's the end of the month and i still have money left. Now i feel kinda good :)

What is all this FOSS about?

When you see variable name like 'hehe' or 'zzz' a lot, you know the project was ducked up..

Yeah, hi!

hehe...

me, first job interview:
interviewer: so how about your knowledge of java
me: yeah, done some projects, should be ok
interviewer: what about polymorphism in java, can you tell me sth about it?
me (thinking i'm totally right): hehe, you can't do polymorphism in java!

guess what, didnt get the job :D

The annual end of year meeting that takes a 3 day offsite so we can list 21 new enterprise projects to be completed the upcoming year - hehe 😅

hehe succinct
repetitive
purposeful
accurate
heartfelt

I'm picking old manuals and documents for recycling, enough to fill one handcart.
Just found a letter from old girlfriends and lovers, and a folder full of a closed form of soft non-gender hentai...
Why do I find homoerotic hentai art better then more normal hentai... I don't know, but I still do.
Well, I'm just gonna save a few... hehe
Btw, also found some paintings and drawings I forgot I've done, 15 years ago. :D

When I was a kid I wanted to be a carpenter like my dad, my parents reaction was always "just keep studying and you can do whatever you want, if you wanna study then do it and don't care about anything else we will help you".

Growing up I became a bit of a geek by hanging out with my uncles (they were the pc gurus in the old days, not anymore hehe). When choosing a college major I knew I wanted it in some kind of engineering, but had no idea besides that, I ended up choosing CS somewhat random and loved the thrill of solving problems so I stuck with it. During it all my parents only really said "as long as you study so you can have what we couldn't give you and do something you like, we will support you!"
I love my parents! 😄

Side note: I think my parents love to be able to brag about my accomplishments, kind of feels like they are entitled to though, since pretty much everything is thanks to them!

!rant

Okay, I try not to swear even when I am frustrated and I’ve had it up to my neck with a certain issue; it’s my personal ideal, and I have my reasons - I also have my ways of venting anger.

I searched for bootstrap on Google just once. Since then, I’ve just been using the actual website to get where I need to. Now, at the beginning of every YouTube video I watch, I get a Udemy ad asking me to enroll into the Bootstrap class. I use Adblock (I know it doesn’t protect me from all their ad scripts) but seriously, can they please tone down on the aggressive ads.

It’s so infuriating. If I have clicked the ad link to be redirected to Udemy, perhaps your AdSense should understand that I don’t want to learn Bootstrap from Udemy. If I see one more f$&@?!#g Udemy web development ad... I might just make it my mission to become a l337 h4x0r and wreck Google. Hehe

Now that that’s out, thanks for reading.

hehe..

That's alot of pronouns but one that feels like me. huhuhuhu

Also I guess fairies are in.

!rant

I love this place, its like our own little corner of the internet that the rubes will never even know of or understand

cheers ya'll

Full Stack PHP Developer seems like to have also DevOps involved in my case hehe.

Hehe I'm back peeps 😭 missed this community so much. Hope I can read yall's rants and have a pleasant laugh :3.

Also, I've ripped apart my android app and I'm rewriting it using Flutter. Yes I did that. I don't regret it though. Does Google have more control over me now or less? I have no clue. The whole dynamic vs. Shutdown framework risk benefit balance out I assume.

How resource calculations for software services like code analysis, monitoring, etc are done:

Opening fridge, putting all the beer one can find in it.

Opening the necessary tools, e.g Excel, Accounting software, ....

Drinking the first beer.

Starting to aggregate the monthly costs - cause you can never trust the reports written by someone else...

First beer poof.

Looking at the monthly cost, adding columns "Intended use", "Actual usage pattern", "Usage factor"...

Opening next beer...

Usage factor is btw a factor of 0.1 ... 1.0 - to give an estimate how much the products feature are actually used, for further analysis if the invest is justified or not...

Oh. Another half bottle gone...

Filling in the columns...

Oh. Bottle empty and the next one toooooooooooooooo...

*burping*
*cracking finger joints*

Now let's get to the sad part...

Next worksheet, adding infrastructure costs...

Cost and description as columns.

Hehe. Column sounds like gollum.

Another beer...

Ugh. Need the paper reports, manually typing off things for stuff that was e.g. tax deductible.

Many beers die during this task. Poor little beers, dying for such an boring and mundane task...

SUM is a real useful function. I don't think I can add numbers anymore.

Now we can add another sheet.

Hehe. Sheet sounds like shit. And yes, everything in this file is shit.

Summing up costs from both sheets and including the cost factor from 1
... Beeeeeeeer Beeeeer beer we need more beer here... Beer beer beer...

Where was I. Oh yeah. Cost factorization total vs effective.

Why do I want to get even more drunk.

Oh yeah. Most software is completely underused and the costs aren't justified.

Let's add some colored highlighting ...

Uuuuh. ,Too much red. Better change the highlights.

Too much red.

More beer.

Don't give a fuck.

Hm.

Time for some whiskey.

What else is there to do....

Oh yeah.

Diagrams.

The bloody wankers from accounting need diagrams as numbers are too boring.

Not that everything in accounting is boring, no matter how much you paint colors on it... *sigh*

Hm. More whiskey...

Hehe. Whiskey rhymes with frisky.

Uff. Now just need to write mail. Mail mail mail....

"Copy paste the last mail from last month"

Hm.

Ah.

*sipping whiskey*

Spell check extension - to the rescue.

Thesaurus *burps*.

Let's change a few words here and there... Maybe another paragraph there.

Uh....

Trying to attach file...

*fucking mouse is pretty constantly crashing into empty beer bottles*

Done.

Damn.

Need to press send button.

*Creating mess on the desk by just randomly crashing the beer bottles*

Done.

*Pressing computers power button*

Mwahahahaha. No mouse needed.

*regretting to stand up too quickly, nearly barfing on the floor*

Couch ... Where Couch...

After hitting several doors, frames and other stuff, the glorious mission ended successfully with a most graciously executed gut buster on the couch.

(Regretting next morning to have emptied two 6 packs and a few glasses of whiskey)

Bird 1: oh no.
Bird 2: don’t worry, he only has one stone.

Hair... Hehe

Hehe :D JavaEenthusiast not found!

Frustrated with works and went to the toilet. Came back with an offer.

Ps: had to take that recruiter's call

so my suspicions were correct... most projects were fake and i was selected as a finalist for that hacking project!!!

wahoooooooo

also, day 5 of not knowing how to mix ES and commonjs packages in node

dutifuly signed,

🤡

Lil' update: so I never went to linux class and I had to learn it within a few days for my exam and I passed hehe

Oh, yes. I need this 60 hour udemy course in my life. I will buy it and then learn everything before moving to the next course

*Buy*

*3 minutes later*

Hehe🤡 this other course looks very helpful. I need it so i can learn. I will buy it

*Buy*

*Minutes🤡 later*

Hehe🤡 this new good course is just what i needed to learn in harmony with the previous two courses. I will buy it

*Buy*🤡

🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡💦💦💦💦💦

lets see...

would i like the glenfidditch 12 year for 45 EUR?

or the laphroaig 10 year for 50 EUR?

😂

seems like a no-brainer to me (and trust me, i have NO brain)

inb4 fullstackcircus is an alcoholic, we already know that

go hang out with the OTHER hacktoberfest participants and tell me something i don't know

What JS framework you don't like but you were forced to study it due to job requirements? I like vue but there are only few job postings that require it. Most jobs here are angular and react. I know angular now and currently learning react because of job requirement reasons hehe!😄

HEHE I am still worthy of being a programmer.DO rant if you like it

Why write unit tests? There is no benefit for the customer.
Me while trying to upgrade to an newer version... ┐(͠≖ ͜ʖ͠≖)┌

DevRant makes our bloated stand-ups way more bearable hehe

Best part of being a dev?
Knowing that given enough time, you could essentially get your computer to do anything you want; and if it doesn't, it's because you made a mistake somewhere and not because it just didn't want to!

Before my dev days (when I wasn't allowed to install any software) wrote an excel macro that would email a colleague with a coffee request after someone challenged me saying I couldn't get the computer to make me coffee, hehe...

Liferay is a fucking malediction inflicted on the human race, bubonic plague has nothing on Liferay. A staunch advocate of legacy tech, bad documentation, bad APIs and poor UX, Liferay has it all. Scriptlets all day every day. Fuck your hot reloads, a deployment cycle is the shit. Why be productive when you can wait for a deployment? Scientists are still deciphering the enigma of Liferay APIs. Over fifteen arguments per method, some optional, some not, littered with value specific functionality. Happy debugging motherfucker. API design is for hacks and pussies, real developers want to know implementation details. JSP the flagship of frontend tech, scriptlets, the pinnacle of evolution. Liferay has PLENTY of that. Did I mention scriptlets? How about obscure Liferay grown frameworks? MetalJS? A bigger mistake than smoking a pound of meth. Liferay UX, heh, heh, design, user experience hehe, hoho. Best joke I've heard. Liferay and UX, choose one.

I'm out, fuck my life.

Hi all. I'm now connected to wifi of another restaurant ordering expensive food and cheap lemonade. Next (hehe nextjs) to this restaurant isa cinema and Barbie movie is being emitted in Extreme IMAX 2D should i go and watch it with my blonde gf after we eat (expensive) food? (last night and this morning i got lots of sexes from her so im pretty low on bullshit today and dont care about wave 2 shitstorm from last night)

Hehe, perfectly sorted

My Dad wanted me to become a Nurse, but he was impressed when I told him I'm going to take up Computer Science since it sounds fancy hehe But til this day he doesn't remember what I do for a living so when the topic pops up in one of our conversations, I have to explain over again. My Mom tells her friends that I am a "Computer Executive", no matter how many times I correct her. 😂

Hi there, my 2 cents to rant on WWDC :)

- Check time? My big head is in the way.
- Work tabs... Why is my Wordle in the list?
- Edit message ... Good bye iMessage memes :(
- Dictation. Hello Jarvis. Hi CIA. Sup 0-day devs
- Live Text. Indian tutorials are now just a copy paste away
- Wallet keys sharing through messages 🤌
- Family. Send more screen time through messages (goodness this messaging app is becoming less green)
- Shared libraries in photos, lovely, now your aunt knows you love visit and taking photos of the neighbor (if you forget to turn it off)
- CarPlay, this will need screen time soon, ui so beautiful you gonna plan a journey by tinkering with the dials
- Check time (part 2) on the iwatch, My big head is still in the way
- Fitness app, Sleep app, Health app, Medication app, mmm lovely but still cant put my confidence in AI
- M2, saw it coming. Spec: scaringly powerful.
- isnt the midnight MacBook air elite?! But the notch tho. Magsafe is back, more thin, this thing looks fragile.
- Did they show a game running lower than the videos fps on purpose? Hmmm
- Ventura's stage manager, xbmc vibes
- Is that Facetime attachment free? Is there a subscription to continuity camera?
- Tab Group Collaboration, hehe, "they can see which tabs you're looking at" hehehe
- Free Form: bloatware

Meh, I cant rant more, honestly the new features look good.

Does anybody know any good software engineering companies to work for around LA? I'm looking for an entry level software engineering position. Full stack would be ideal, but at this point I just want to get my foot in the door with a good company where I can learn a lot. Maybe even a company that knows how to have fun too (if that's not too much to ask hehe 😅).

!rant

Hehe, this gave me a giggle

First It has to be challenged task. It must have something that challenge me Second Short Answer "BUG".. hehe I cant sleep until I catch it and resolve it

When your quite amazed about your system looking messed up on clients PC. And found out that her Display drivers were outdated. Its like opening it on IE browser. hehe. When I updated the drivers and then it looks good again . Horay. :)

Hehe

When your boss says 'GOOD JOB' but in reality you just trade the stock market the whole day. hehe

Any developers slash traders here?

When you fine gentlemen see me shitposting, just know that sukmikehok is not writing these posts, the burnout from within inside of him is writing them th🤣x u hehe

Partial thoughts, are thoughts that sound like they should have more to them. However they are intentionally left short to create a sense that more is to come. This creates a state of anxiety in people and their desire for closure. The sentence is more effective if you say the last part of the sentence with an increasing pitch. This indicates there is more to the story. When in fact there is no more to the story.

Here is an example:
"I saw this guy walking down the street..."

People will automatically assume there is more to this story. So they will say something like, "And then what?" The response is: "That is it. That is what I saw." This is the peak time of frustration. They may even argue with you or storm away. Be prepared to be called names.

There is actually some history behind this.

...

Hehe, no, I am not going to leave you high and dry. In high school a dude I knew would always make fun of my friend. So I started doing these partial stories to the dude. He would get mad and storm off each time. I would do this several times per day. So it can be a tactic to deal with difficult people.

Rawr X3 *nuzzles* How are you? *pounces on you* you're so warm o3o *notices you have a bulge* someone's happy! *nuzzles your necky wecky* ~murr~ hehe 😉 *rubbies your bulgy wolgy* you're so big! *rubbies more on your bulgy wolgy* it doesn't stop growing .///. *kisses you and licks your neck* daddy likes 😉 *nuzzle wuzzle* I hope daddy likes *wiggles butt and squirms* I wanna see your big daddy meat! *wiggles butt* I have a little itch o3o *wags tails* can you please get my itch? *put paws on your chest* nyea~ it's a seven inch itch *rubs your chest* can you pwease? *squirms* pwetty pwease? 🙁 I need to be punished *runs paws down your chest and bites lip* like, I need to be punished really good *paws on your bulge as I lick my lips* I'm getting thirsty. I could go for some milk *unbuttons your pants as my eyes glow* you smell so musky 😉 *licks shaft* mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm so musky 😉 *drools all over your cawk* your daddy meat. I like. Mister fuzzy balls. *puts snout on balls and inhales deeply* oh my gawd. I'm so hard *rubbies your bulgy wolgy* *licks balls* punish me daddy nyea~ *squirms more and wiggles butt* I9/11 lovewas an yourinside muskyjob goodness *bites lip* please punish me *licks lips* nyea~ *suckles on your tip* so good *licks pre off your cock* salty goodness~ *eyes roll back and goes balls deep*

Tomorrow I'm going to my first international travel, and it isn't just that, I'm also going to work there.
Am I nervous? A lit lot hehe
Am I ready for it? I'm not sure, even my bag isn't ready for it.
But I hope that everything will be alright and in the end of day, if nothing goes well, I'm gonna know that it is going to be a great experience

Tracking/logging hours, how do you do it? Is there some decent software for Linux that does this?

I wanna start tracking my time doing specific tasks, so I'm just wondering what other ppl use, if at all hehe