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Anyone else used Stack Overflow for many years without ever asking or answering a single question?21
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I. FUCKING. HATE. MOBILE. DEVELOPMENT.
I already manage the data, devops, infra, and most of the backend dev.
We had a mobile guy. He was great. I never had to think about it and kept moving quickly on my work. #SpecializationOfLaborFTW
He left. Why? Because they wouldn't give him a small raise despite being one of the best mobile engineers in the firm. WTF.
I made the mistake of picking up just enough slack on this workflow in the interim such that I'm, apparently, the fucking god-damned release manager, fixer of pipelines, fixer of build configs, fixer of anything where someone just needs to RTFM for a half-hour to not fucking break things.
Now, 8 months later...and, apparently, Fortune 500 companies are too fucking god-damned cheap to pay for someone who actually knows WTF they're doing for a very reasonable thing to have at least one dedicated set of eyes for.
I never wanted to be a mobile dev.
I never will want to be a mobile dev.
And I certainly don't want to manage your HALF-FACE-FUCKED detached expo configs.
There's a reason I never intentionally involved myself in mobile. All the way down, it's just shitty cross-compilation, transpilation, dependency-hell, brittle-as-fuck build processes so we can foot-gun and mouth-gun react-native and expo and babel and whatever the fuck else cargo-culted horseshit into the wild.
And why? What's the actual fucking root cause? The biggest white elephant that ever fucking elephant-ed? It's because Apple and Google decided to never collaborate on a truly-native cross-platform SDK--where engineers could write native code that compiles to native binaries that's simply write-once, run-everywhere. They know they could have done that, and they didn't. So what'd they get back? Expo--a too-cleverly-designed backdoor/hack--more-or-less a way to circumvent the sane release process software has usually followed: code -> executable -> deploy. Or code -> deploy (for interpreted langs). Expo's like "keep your same executable, we're just gonna to do updates by injecting new code into it whenever we want". Didn't we learn anything with web? Shit gets messy real quick? Not to mention: HEY EXPO, WE WERE ALREADY BUILDING NATIVE APPS, YOU SHORT-SIGHTED FUCKS. THANKS FOR LURING OUR CTOs INTO FORCING EXPO DOWN OUR THROATS W/ THE IMPLICIT (BUT INCORRECT) TOO-GOOD-TO-BE-TRUE PROMISE THAT WE CAN HAVE WRITE-ONCE, RUN-ANYWHERE WITHOUT ANY BUY-IN OR COOPERATION FROM THE ACTUAL TARGET PLATFORMS.
And, we just, like, accept this? We all know it's garbage engineering. The principles we learned in the classroom aren't just academic abstractions--they actually yield real-world results--and eschewing them yields real-world failures. Expo is tightly-coupled to high-heaven, with leaky abstractions six-ways-to-christmas, chock-full of foot-guns, and fails the most basic test of quality: does it, "just work?"
Expo is fucking shameful and it should fucking die. Its promises are too bold, its land-mines too many, its future-proof-ness is alway, always, always questionable as fuck and a risk to every project that uses it.
You want a rant? This is my fucking venue, 'tis not? Well, then this is a piss and vinegar rant straight from my blood-red, beating fucking heart:
EXPO FUCKING SUCKS. AND IF YOU'RE A FAN, YOU FUCKING SUCK TOO.27 -
When you decide to use a model for an engineering picture this is what happens. (Look at her hand)
26 -
My sister in law got me this guy for Christmas after I told her about devrant!
She found it in a rubber duck shop in Amsterdam.
Best sister in law!
11 -
Best part of being a dev?
The perceived ability to fix ANY electronic device owned by friends and family.
"So you work with computers? Any idea what's wrong with my toaster?"7 -
Colleague started to share their screen
Me: screen is not visible to be
Them: let me just increase the brightness of my monitor5 -
I could be wrong, but I believe all devs love a clear section saying
"Getting Started" to any form of documentation5 -
My school stores everyone's username and passwords (including admins) in plain text on a Windows 2007 server that they remote desktop into.8
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Asked junior to clone a git repo
junior: tried everything it doesn't work
me: show me how you did it
junior: right clicked on the repository, 'Copy link address' then paste it into the terminal
me: put that mouse down right now!26 -
A common scenario strikes again today:
- Blocked on a problem at the end of the day
- Tell my wife I'm headed home
- Inspiration strikes
- time flies by coding in the zone
- realize I'm super late
- run out the door like a crazy person1 -
Night before flying internationally includes the following checklist:
- check VPN works, can access frontend sites and hit the backend
- git push4 -
This morning I kept falling back asleep after the alarm went off, drifting in and out of a dream about programming.
My wife finally said "no more sleeping".
Still mostly sleep, I replied very confidently "you can't sleep in a sandbox!".
I was dreaming I was in a code sandbox. Obviously sleeping is not allowed.
Jeez, my head has been really full of programming since this conference. (One of the talks was on codesandbox). -
After doing the work he requested as he wanted he was not happy. So i thought we sit and discuss what he didn't like. I was so wrong.
...
Boss: "...you know what I think you are: a fraud; Masquerading as a developer. The database design you have given is shit. The template I gave you I did in 1 hour. You took half the day."
He gave a simple template to use and he told me to come up with an ecommerce db design via downloading PrestaShop and seeing what is relevant to us.
Me: "what did I do wrong?"
Boss: "you think I don't know what PK means in database design? Why the fuck did you put this here."
Me: "can I expl..."
Boss: "I'm not finished, you been here half the month and what work have you to show for it..."
Me: "I have..."
Boss: "You shut up when I can speaking"
Me: "ok"
Boss: "You have no work to show for the time you have been here. I tell you what to do. I want someone who is proactive. My friend, you will do the work I tell you to do, you understand?"
Me: "yes but can I just say that I have been doing your work I have the contact the various developers as you..."
Boss: " You shut up when your boss is speaking. Can you do this work? (Slightly long pause)
Me: "I can do it. But, I have done the bits of the work you said I do. I was h..."
Boss "don't give me bullshit stories...you haven't done the work..."
Me: "But you have spoken"
Boss:" You know what Im giving you 1 weeks notice if you are not able to do the work. Can you do it?"
That moment!!! I was literally shaking I could have high fived his face with his laptop.
Me: "yes I can"
Boss: "Then get the fuck out of my sight and do it"8 -
Attend all the meetings, they said. They're super important, they said. You'll get more code done if we hyper-report on progress they said. The bugs are piling up and we need to have even more meetings, they said.
STOP SAYING THINGS AT ME AND LET ME FUCKING CODE YOU INSUFFERABLE CUNTS.1 -
Let me tell you a story.
Our company has a homegrown monitoring solution. Keeps track of our deployments and alerts us when something is broken. Really nice for the most part, except a little issue where we get up to 25 alerts PER DAY that our PRODUCTION ENVIRONMENT IS DOWN. Including weekends.
With this many false positives, we quickly learn to ignore the alerts and miss real incidents.
So we approached this team, remember its our own tool, and told them about the problem. Turns out it is a known issue. And here's the kicker: they aren't planning on fixing it!
It gets better. Rather than fix this glaring issue, their solution is to make ANOTHER ALERT that lets us know the monitoring is misbehaving.
To recap, we can now expect to get up to 25 false positive alerts per day that our production is down, followed immediately by more alerts that the monitor is broken, which means we can ignore the previous alert.
As our PM said when he heard this: fuck that noise. We are escalating the shit out of this!7 -
I'm such an idiot.
Spilled water on my MacBook today. Not that much water, but the cup landed right in the middle of my keyboard.
Worst part is I was gaming with my sister and didn't want to stop. So I wiped it off and shook it out a bit and kept playing. A bit later the screen started flickering and eventually went black.
Finally my brain turned on and I switched it off, shook out some more water, and set it up to dry. Just hoping it's not too late.
At least the drying setup recommended by the internet is pretty hilarious looking.
Now we play the waiting game. They say 72 hours before turning it on again. Seems a bit extreme. Will there still be moisture evaporating 3 days later? Not sure I can wait that long to see if it's toast.
Such an idiot.
14 -
*spends a long time crafting a huge eBay post (we're moving)
* tries to drag and drop first picture
* page navigates to the picture without warning
* loses everything
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
WHEN DRAGGING A PICTURE INTO A WEB PAGE I NEVER WANT TO NAVIGATE TO A PAGE WITH JUST THAT IMAGE. WHY NO WARNING BEFORE LEAVING THE PAGE. WHY DON'T YOU SAVE TEXT LOCALLY. WHY DOES THE WEB SUCK SO HARD. AAAGGGHHHH.
* feels better
* starts over7 -
Netflix, why is your loading spinner so horrible!
Do you know what a percentage is??? 99% means you are ALMOST done. Just a tiny fraction to go. I should not see 99% for seconds or even minutes on end. Much less after the first 98% took only a couple seconds!!
Stop the lies!!!5 -
Introduction to graphics
Lecturer says "this is a very practical course. In fact I think we should have a practical exam"
All students agree. He would sort out that matter.
Meanwhile he taught us how to making shapes in java, then a house, then a game...
And the exam was for us to make a building where a user can walk through the building using the arrow keys...
What fun we had. We got out marks...and everybody did well!!!!1 -
My new fitbit reminds me take 250 steps each hour. When I do stop and take a walk, I find it helps my productivity, and I feel better. However, I'm not good at keeping to it.
It's always the same story.
"Quiet you, I'll get up and walk once I finish this one thing".
...
Another hour goes by.
If only I could keep to my own convictions.4 -
I left uni in 2005 clutching my shiny new .NET based degree, and was instantly hired by a local software firm... to maintain their legacy Turbo Pascal systems.2
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I spent more than an hour trying trying to debug why two functions were always returning undefined. I even put in conditional breakpoints and executed the statements to confirm the logic was correct.
I forgot return.4 -
I think my productivity at work seriously went up when I discovered this site with custom noise generators. Blocks out my coworkers, and I can pretend it's raining all the time. Perfect for coding!
http://mynoise.net/NoiseMachines/...2 -
Fuck you Australian Fucking Internet!!
Yea sure i have fucking hours to sit here and fucking upload a 4GB repo to gitlab at 5kb/s!!! - yes the slow ass KILOBYTES, you overly expensive piece of horse shit.
fuck it, connects to phone and bam 1MB/s uploads, well theres goes a chunk of this month data :(7 -
There was an error in one of my Java file. Impossible to find it. I commented all the code and the error remain. I commented the import of that class and no more error. How the f**** is possible that a empty class give an error ?
I opened the file in another text editor and found out that the last character was a symbol that wasn't recognize or display in other text editor.
I was really proud (and confused)3 -
The craziest deadline I have had was to build an e-commerce site with php in 3 days after learning php for just a week.
<rant> am I oz or Harry Potter?</rant>1 -
That pure rage when you're off work for a few days, and return to find that someone has been in one of your magnificently neat code files, and taken a syntactic shit! Loads of unnecessary whitespace, tabs all over the place, and copy/pasted comments that have nothing to do with the code! 😫1
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Coding has given me the ability to turn my favorite hobby into a career. This in turn gave me the chance to take jobs in three countries so far (US, Germany, UK). So, I can explore the world with lovely wife while doing something I'm really passionate about and constantly learning. It also allows me to relate more to my dad, a software engineer of about 30 years who got me started when I was a kid.
In short, coding changed everything for me.
PS: I met my wife in intro to CS, though she's not a developer. -
Source code works on my local machine, even when I present it to the relevant users; no body panics its all part of the plan. Place it on the server and it does not work AND EVERYONE LOSES THEIR MIND!1
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After being live multiple years supporting only Safari, Firefox, and Chrome, one customer wanted IE support. After taking a close look at the usage numbers, and discussing with us front-end devs, our product guy shot it down. Pop the champagne!2
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When your company buys a third party solution and you spend all your time emailing them about bugs in their system.
Seriously, I even sent you the exact line of the bug in your JavaScript with a suggested solution, and deployed a new stack with your latest (broken) fix so you can test out that solution. Then you email back saying it is fixed but it is clearly still broken. If I email you a fixed version of your file will you deploy it? OMG!1 -
So, this is probably somewhat esoteric but...
While studying at university I had a "programming paradigms" module, dunno why they called it that, it was more like "introduction to functional programming".
So, it's kinda mind bending, we'd only really started to get our heads around classical object oriented programming and they throw functional programming at us.
It's worse than that though, for do they use an established language, like lisp/scheme, functional Python, or even given Haskell?
No, of course they didn't. They taught us Oz.
You probably won't have heard of it, but this language is burned into the back of my brain, along with a vague understanding of the n-queens problem we had to solve graphically (using qTk, which I dunno if someone took qt and tk and blended them, I stopped asking questions after a while).
To top it off did this language (at the time) have a stand alone interpreter? Did it buggery! It was coupled to the Mozart programming system, which is just Emacs (which has a bloody lisp built into it,so close, yet so far 😭).
It gets worse, though, oh does it get worse, for pause dear reader and consider, have you ever heard of Mozart/oz before, I'd put money on most of you had not heard of it until today.
For, you see, I believe at the time of writing, one, yes, ONE text book exists on this language. When I was doing my assignment there was merely some published conference notes and language design documents.
That's not all, I was not the only one experiencing difficulties with this language, someone in the class ended up pouring through the mailing lists and found the very tutor teaching the class struggling at first to understand the language.
I had to repeat that year. The functional programming class was one semester.
When I retook that year, it was a whole year long. However, halfway through the year, original tutor was fired and a new tutor was hired to teach the language.
He was, understandably, just as confused as we were.
There was a Starbucks and a pub equidistant from the lecture hall, though in opposite directions. From lecture to lecture we had no idea which one we'd end up in.
I have reason to believe Mozart/Oz it some sort of otherworldly abomination designed to give students the occasional nightmare flashback, long after they've left.
My room had post it notes, sheets of paper, print outs, diagrams, doodles and pens, just stuck to the wall, I looked like a raving lunatic three hours away from being institutionalised. There was string connecting one diagram to the next and images of a chess queen all over. As I attempted to solve the n-queens problem.
Madmans knowledge, I call it. I can never unlearn all that, in fact it seeps into much of the code I write. Such information was not meant for the minds of a simple country bumpkin such as myself...
Mozart/Oz... I wouldn't be the programmer I am today without it, and that's frankly terrifying...10 -
Just investigating a bug reported by QA. Spoke to the dev responsible for the code, and asked why they'd called a particular function. Their reply:
"Well the function name sounded right. I didn't check what it actually did"
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Being thrown in the deep end, baptism by fire is the best/worst way to learn a new codebase
Its not appropriate for everyone but it weirdly works -
Now my facebook messenger app does it's updates inside the app without my consent to install an apk.
I'm scared
6 -
Deep Thought Rant
It's funny how the world works these days...companies only looking for "senior *something*" developers to work...
Mentorship and internship also do matter. What's happening?...sure you can contribute to open source but having a mentor also helps. Working as an intern allows one to see not only tech bit but workplace environment. How to deal with deadlines, feeling good and wasted at the same time when one bug that took a 3 minutes to fix but 3 hours to find, presenting your work; well what's working only, being bashed when it's your fault or not (even though that sucks), learning from your mentor and so on
Are their companies that still do this?3 -
When you make a mistake and try to fix it, but you can't remember how to spell amend...
git commit --ammend
error: unknown command `amend'
git commit -ammend
[branch-name] mend
Huh?
git log
commit #
mend
Created a new commit with message 'mend'. Now to clean this all up and go get some sleep!2 -
Years ago, one of my friends in college was taking an intro to CS class. He asked me for help on one of his assignments. It was a simple Python program, but it wasn't running as expected. I go in figuring it will be easy to fix. But everything looks exactly right. An hour later I'm tearing my hair out! It isn't even entering the function although it's clearly called. I'm beginning to feel very self conscious, as a CS major who can't even debug a 15 line program for a friend.
Then it hit me. This is Python. I used an editor macro to convert all indentation to tabs, lined them up, and it ran on the first try. Turns out, he had somehow ended up with a mixture of tabs and spaces.
I'm not sure what the takeaway is, but I think he got a surprisingly honest introduction to the life of a developer...2 -
!rant
Super awesome day today.
1. Got up early to do a risky production deploy and it worked!
2. Three PRs approved before lunch.
3. Got some time to continue learning scala.
4. Coffee and cupcakes with some refugees and discussed work as a software engineer.
5. Tried virtual reality for the first time. Really fun.
6. Helped prepare our goals for this quarter and present them to the department.
7. Department meeting had free local craft beer and pretzels.
8. Went bouldering after work and flashed a 6c.
9. Curled up with my wife watching Netflix.
I really love my life sometimes.5 -
When the PO asks for a last second code change right before the sprint review, and now it's your turn to demo
1 -
Java teacher writes code on blackboard in comp lab
He tells us to try it out at our workstations.
We do. The code does work. We tell him.
He says: "There is something wrong with your compiler..."
Question is...we were around 30 students. Can all our compilers not work if we had used the lab before and the code we run worked clean??!?!?!?
We were flabbergasted2 -
Me: *adds a shiny new graph to our foos web app showing player ratings*
Fred: Can I please have a button to see just my scores?
Me: *adds "JUST FRED" button*
Fred: perfect, thanks4 -
My password manager!!
I use passwords I can never remember, stay logged in, next time I need to log_in I use the passqord forgotten button, reset it with my e-mail or better phone2 -
PSA: negate your tests and make sure they fail!
I have what I thought was a weird and slightly paranoid habit. When I write tests sometimes just as a sanity check negate the assertion to make sure the test fails and isn't a false positive. Almost always fails as expected.
But not today! Turns out I had forgotten to wrap my equality check in an assertion so it would always pass. It freaks me out to imagine pushing a test that always passes not just because it doesn't do its job, but could also obscure a bug and trick me into thinking it works differently than it does. Broken tests are the worst!
But it pays to be paranoid. -
When you are involved in a conflict of interest project and its kept under wraps ...but your IT director still wants you to do it because his friend needs something done but don't want to pay for it
Who else has faced this? Or am I the only one...?3 -
When you offer to help out a fellow coworker on the top priority feature he is developing and he just sends you the branch and stops working on it.2
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I get home today and my wife says:
"Just finished some chores and really want to play stardew valley, but the computer has been updating for an hour!"
Windows 10 anniversary update strikes again.3 -
Didn't install linux for years now. Today, I have to and nothing changed about wifi drivers, at all ! Even the install process still sucks !
And they still ask to "sudo apt-get install fucking-wifi-driver" ?!?!?!
I don't have internet yet, that's the all point, damn it !22 -
In uni
Lecturer: SOAP is insecure...
In interview: Any disadvantages you see with SOAP?
Me: The last i read SOAP is insecure. Im abit rusty with this knowledge
Interviewer: ahhh okay, SOAP is actually secure...
DAMN YOU LECTURER!2 -
We've been using private GitHub repos as a distribution method for our personal npm packages at work for years.
I finally got sick of it and did the work to publish them to artifactory yesterday. Today, I worked out the remaining kinks, fixed the CI builds, and wrote a wiki page explaining the change with step by step migration instructions and sent it around to the rest of the devs. And it's working great!
I feel simultaneously like a hero for finally getting this fixed and an idiot for putting up with it for so long.
Also thankful for my devops friend who helped a bunch.1 -
I hate the process of trying to get hydrated when I’ve gone through a period of apparently thinking I’m a cactus.
When I don’t drink water at all, I feel fine. No dry mouth, no symptoms of dehydration.
I *start* trying to hydrate and it’s like my body thinks this is the best time to start giving me all those dehydration symptoms it doesn’t even bother with when I’m not drinking water because it’s just given up on me listening to them.
I drank 64 oz of water yesterday and woke up with my tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth and my throat scratchy.
I know that I need to keep drinking water in large quantities for a period of time for my body to chill the fuck out again, but words can’t describe how tempting it is to just go back to being a cactus.
Hydrating sucks.8 -
I think all our jobs are safe
I've been sitting in a laundromat watching what passes for children's tv because they won't change the fucking channel.
This is not return to oz or something wicked this way comes or even Aladdin's
This is in fact more retarded than the tellitubbies and it will make the gen of kids that watch it amazed with us as if they we were goddamn magicians
God damn5 -
Lesson of the day:
<If a section of your code keeps on bringing errors, just comment it. The code is likely to work./>4 -
So, I'm looking into something and end up on Stack Overflow. Someone posted the question:
"Does minified javascript improve performance?"
This question was old as shit, all they way from 07/25/09, and about an Adobe Air application. (Remember that? Me neither...) It had a great, accepted, and still accurate answer, posted the same day the question was asked. Now, fast forward 8 years and on 12/08/17 (A mere 7 months ago...) the following answer was posted. I don't know what they were thinking, but here it is, complete and unabridged, with my comments in square brackets:
"I'd like to post this as a separate answer as it somewhat contrasts the accepted one: [Somewhat contrasts? More like completely contradicts...]
Yes, it does make a performance difference as it reduces parsing time - and that's often the critical thing. For me, it was even just simply linear in the size and I could get it from 12s to 4s parse time by minifying from 3MB to 1MB. [First off, your parse time should NEVER be THE critical thing, but secondly, and more importantly, WHO THE FUCK HAS 1MB OF MINIFIED JS ON A PAGE!!!]
It's not a big app either, it just has a couple of reasonable dependencies. [THERE IS ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY NOTHING REASONABLE ABOUT ANYTHING HE JUST SAID! What dependancies is he using?! You could use minified and not even gzipped jQuery, AngularJS, Vue, Ember, React, AND Dojo libraries on the SAME PAGE, AND have 118k of application code, AND STILL NOT HAVE HIT 1MB QUITE YET!!!]
So the moral of the story here is: Yes, minifying is important for performance - and not because of bandwidth, but because of parsing. [Javascript should NEVER take longer to parse then to download, even on a low powered device...]"
So, yeah, I'm at a loss for what this guy was thinking, but the thought the people like this exist, and that my browser might one day be subjected to their horrific nightmare of code terrifies me...2 -
How can you bring in a PBX device with no manual at all and the settings are all in Chinese and expect me to be a God and configure it?2
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I want to buy a beer for everyone who developed the mobile pass app. Just breezed through immigration and customs without waiting in the 1 hour+ line. Technology wins. Cheers!1
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What happens when you give a database design to your boss as per what he wants done, he sees it is not impressed, scolds you, curses you out and claims you are 'fraud'. Then you tell him you can do better to redeem yourself...you submit the work better than the first time
And then he terminates you due to 'lack of proficiency'.3 -
Company now sends everyone to home office.
Expected - "Yeah! No more time spent with bus/subway. I can finally escape from people stopping me when I'm ready to leave."
Reality - "mail received at 8pm and phone ringing 'did you get that file? Need it ready ASAP.'"2 -
It's only August but I already know what I'll be thankful for come Thanksgiving:
1. Our next president.
2. Integration tests.1 -
I had an interesting mystery the other day. I work in the UK, but I'm working remotely from the US for a while. First day, I made some changes, ran the tests and they failed. Weird part was the failing test was for a component I hadn't touched. I took a closer look, and realized it was a date off by several hours. The test was checking that a passed in date appears in the output. But it was creating the date by parsing a string. The library I was using defaults to local time, but the component uses UTC. So, I had inadvertently created a unit test that only passes when run from UTC. But I had never noticed before because my work is in that timezone. Yikes!
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Just attended my first conference and it was awesome! So many new ideas, but also tired and overloaded. Can't decide if I should code tonight, go to bed early, or just do something mindless.1
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A Chinese coworker who always brought a tea flavoured hand lotion bottle and applied it before coding on his finger tips and wore the same clothes from Monday to Friday changed only his shoes...2
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So what do you call people who like Apple devices only or Android devices only? Or someone who thinks Apple devices are superior only or Android devices are superior only ?
Devicist ???12 -
It looks like Windows almost stopped me from exiting the mall. I had to call customer care to save me from situation. The toll station froze on me. Why Windows? Why?
3 -
So, apparently, in 2015 our webhost (ixwebhosting) was purchased by Site5... This week, they finally migrated us to Site5 servers without warning, taking my email down in the process...
Today, after following the instructions in their own KB article (that tells you to click an icon that doesn't exist,) and chatting with support for over an hour, I was told that the new system they migrated us to doesn't support catch-all email accounts... At all... It's simply not possible to receive an email that was sent to your domain, unless the email address exists in the system somewhere... Despite the fact that it's a standard cPanel feature, that the old and new systems both use cPanel, that every other webhost I have ever seen that uses cPanel has this feature available, AND the fact that this is an important feature for a lot of websites, because they pipe all of their emails to a script for processing... It's simply not possible... They won't be providing that feature anymore. Nor for that matter is it possible to be migrated back...
They migrated accounts to a system that has a basic email function intentionally disabled, without warning... And we can't afford to open an account with someone else ATM... So I can't get any email until we get migrated... FML9 -
Things you should not say on your last day of work:
If I broke it, I think it would be pretty obvious. -
Just moved countries and started a new job at an awesome company, which is so great I have nothing yet to rant about.
Oh here goes: almost three weeks with no internet at home and no end in sight.2 -
I know there is SoundCloud, Earbits for music... Sometimes I use YouTube.
I am coding to get to my beast mode but my YouTube mix picks up a song I don't want and then I change tabs just to skip or change your mix...then poooofff
ALL OVA SURRRDDDDEN
You are watching "scaring cats videos" -
I need to stop adding, weep uncontrollably, between tasks in my work to do list before my coworkers start thinking I'm serious.
Technically I am serious - you would be too if you had to manage the servers I inherited - but I don't want to ruin the all powerful Wizard of Oz vibe I got going.1 -
Client push back: when the client wants an impractical feature to be implemented and you tell them HELL NO, with a little sugar coating of course
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Why is so Fitbit so bad at multiple time zones??
Guess what, people get on planes and travel.
Every time, my Fitbit gets so screwed up, including things like changing previous step counts, or duplicating an entire day of steps.
I understand MTZ is a tough problem, but this is just unacceptable. I'm not obsessed with my steps, but when your product is all about counting something, seems like you should be more careful to avoid double counting or not counting at all. Seriously, how much R&D have they invested in their hardware and apps, but it completely fails when you travel. Get it together!1 -
Me those days:
- Comes home from work, lots of motivation to work on personal projects
- Sits down in front of the PC and starts coding
- Stops coding after 5 because sweat is dripping into eyes
- Lays down in bed completely dead and sleeps until the next day
- Goes to work
Fucking love those temperatures...1 -
Chances of getting all the bugs fixed before the demo...
"What do you think Abdul? Can you give me a number crunch real quick?"
1 -
Lead developer likes premature optimization. Always forces me to remove a if here and there because "bad for the performance".
Now her optimization caused a base component to fail, ppl will have to spend the night debugging.
Best of all, it's my last day ;) -
One of the key principles in Life is acceptance. I just wish some of the codes could understand this....
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Computer does a BSOD right at the end of a tiebreaker competitive overwatch match where the enemy is about to cap the point and win. I'm one of the tanks. Hard reboot and back in the game within 45s. Just barely hold them off in overtime and win the match. Epic!
Thank God for SSDs!4 -
Fuck companies that want you to build new systems that are a superset of what they already have when they can't even tell you what they have now. Fuck you with your bullshit, nonsensical, self-contradicting, third-assed diagrams--some half-UML, half-clip-art, half-pie-chart drivel. If you're the CTO of a company and you want me to think long and hard about rebuilding your distributed systems, you can think long and hard about expressing what you already have. And NO: a verbal explanation pow-pow WebEx over your DSL connection with your protege that mumbles worse than an Atlantan rapper doesn't count as fucking "knowledge transfer" of your fucking architecture, FOR FUCKS SAKE.
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Something very interesting today
I worked on an API feature and it was approved and merge to the stable copy of the project. But then comes the demo.
Now we used Heroku(this devil)
The database uses sqlite. I can register an account on the web application. But the user table has only the admin account even though i have successfully managed to register.
I dont know what sorcery this was!
I simply went with the saying "it is working on my local machine"
Only to realise minutes to the demo the build pack was not done well at the beginning...
What is life... -
There are days you feel like a God and there days you have no idea what you are doing in the dev space.
All in all perseverance with a whimsical tone -
When everyone thinks FE is easier, quicker, and less important than BE. Just because our fantastic UX people made you a high fidelity mockup in a day does not mean we can build the whole FE in a week.
This is why I'm returning to full stack. -
Rejected for the job . Out in technical round, though i gave all the correct answers.
Me: seating outside with a down face.🦁
HR: what happened? you seems to bit low .
Me: sir ,got rejected in technical round.🐷
HR: work on mistakes.
Me: yeah sir🦊
Inner me: tell me the mistakes fucker...
Why ? Why? Why?
Dealing with rejection for no reason 🐀17 -
Damn, mozart, i am trying to install it for the whole day, and now when i am able to finally install it, i dont know how to compile and run a piece of code in it. Why does anyone create such a language that works majorly on emacs, and also has no well enough documentation how to work with it, if by fluke someone installed it.2
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Its funny when your code is tested by your peers and they approve it and it works...and when you present your progress to your PO he says it doesnt work...hmmmmm1
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I was always interested in computers. My dad was a big computer geek and a programmer to boot. Usually had a couple old PCs in the basement to play with.
In middle school, I took tech ed and we made simple web sites with html and css. I remember the struggle of nested tables.
In high school, I couldn't fit any CS into my schedule. But someone gave me a learning to code book in ruby. I loved it, and have been hooked ever since. -
All married devs here who married devs
Why did you chose a dev and not another profession?
Of course skipping the love4 -
Hello Guys, I am in a dilemma whether I should update my Laptop to Windows 10 Fall Creator Update or not. Any honest opinions or recommendations from Devs?
(posed to Windows Users)7 -
Best tip for getting unstuck? If it's after your usual leaving time, GO HOME.
So many times I solved the problem right away the next morning. Only wish I followed my own advice more often... -
Pycharm why you no allow me to continue to use the professional edition...
Damnn and they way pycharm has served me well7 -
Current Mac and Windows user here looking to get back into Linux. Any distro suggestions?
Looking for something not too high maintenance.7 -
Why are you paying me to architect your new stack if you're just going to mandate that I use Guice and Jersey "because that's what you're using already"? I'm sorry. You're wrong. Spring Boot is not a "dying technology". I'm not going to build you a servlet from scratch. Get fukt.1
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It drives me crazy when there are unclosed parens or quotes anywhere.
Is it too much to ask for people to run their Facebook posts through a compiler first? -
Any recommendations for moving a blog?
My wife and I just cancelled our account with siteground hosting a WordPress blog. Looking for a cheaper alternative. Willing to get my hands dirty as a web dev, but would like a nice CMS experience for my wife. Also want to keep our existing content. If we can keep our custom domain somehow that would be a win.
Thanks!7 -
Focus: Get up and walk around, disturb someone(calculated disturbing), break a window,
Procrastinating: DO IT NOW, JUST DO IT, MAKE YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE
....sorry
Yes my 2 cents -
You build, develop and test systems and software...but because its under the bracket of IT, they think playing music and kinda sorta being a DJ and watchman of a laptop during a promotion is sufficient for you.
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Which of the two jobs is better for a frontend Dev:
1. React project, stressful, bad communication, depending on bad internal libraries
2. WordPress theme building, higher paid, promising startup with stock options8 -
Can i just get a simple consistent react tutorial that goes step by step even when consuming an API...
IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK FOR? -
Trying to add money to a prepaid SIM card today. Their website is a mess. Plus and minus buttons were not functioning, so my only option was to add 15 euro. Checked the console, no errors. Tried triggering the buttons jQuery, no luck. Found a data value attached to the submit button set to 15. Changed to 10, clicked submit, and BOOM, it worked! You just got engineered!
After I paid, I was curious, went back and set it to -15, and tried it again. Unfortunately, they know about backend validation. -
Colleague from a remote office emails me to ask what version of some tooling is installed on a build machine. Generally I wouldn't mind, but for the fact they're literally sat next to said build machine in the remote office. I mean... why get up and look yourself, when you can just IM somebody to look for you... right?
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Is it normal that my lead developer insists that if(x){return A} else {return B} must be changed to if (x){return A} return B, and a variable must be renamed from requestFn to requestFunc because the former is confusing?12
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My lead developer requires object sorting, so {url, extraParams = { id = '1', hobby = 'code' }} HAVE TO be {extraParams = {hobby = 'code', id = '1'}, url}. Is that normal?4
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Mozart Oz...
I shall let it speak for itself: https://mozart.github.io/mozart-v1/...
I've spoken to a couple of therapists and I'm in a better place now, but this is hands down the worst bit of technology I've ever worked with.9 -
Ran a test today. It was comparing whether a the reducer returned the correct state when a type and list is passed to it. The test failed. But something very curious happened. I am using webstorm and so the IDE told me 'click to see differences'. I did and the message at the top read as follows "The 2 lists are identical" (The expected and actual result). So my test worked but it didn't work. What is life!? I finally got it working though😕1
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Damnnn my Team lead is hinting that i write a test for the feature I paired with a team member.
But the large django code base is ridden with abstract classes and classes and inheritance etc...its going to be a long night -
I'm pretty sure remote teams don't work with the remote team doing all the coding and we have the same exact JD and in the same department...*sigh* when management are foreign, they really are afraid of letting the local tech team help out. No wonder we are 3, sorry 2 since a fellow dev left to a better job in Amsterdam
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Shallow() or To Mount()....shit react tests have been killing me. The issues on github have not been resolved. And our team lead has insisted on them even more. Haha they way I have been ditching them.
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I walk by our devops dashboard several times per day. It keeps track of key metrics for all our live services. I noticed an interesting trend the last few weeks.
3 weeks ago: all metrics green
2 weeks ago: 1 metric red
1 week ago: 1 metric still red
this week: 1 metric still red but covered with a post it note -
Any of you guys know about Feathers UI ? Based on Google Trends, I'll assume that you don't. But if you do please let me know
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Use Linear gradient ...
No use rgba
Arghhhh...okay rgba looks OK...wait linear gradient is better...no wait
Hallelujah!!!!!2 -
Well here i thought i would have done work...and pooof its time to go home
All i did was refactor with and make PR...
*SIGH*
I guess today was one of those days where little work was done -
I was out of work for 6 months...I applied at a company that takes in devs and trains them. There was a test, then a personal interview, then a bootcamp process...it was hard. But I pulled through.
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Just a small question for my own curiosity here.
Have you ever heard about the Oz programming language?8 -
Repel people who think just because I did IT (and they skip the part to ask, what specifically in IT), I can fix their computers only and I'm of no use beyond that. Immediately they think "he is an IT guy maybe he can fix..." Vrooommm and they are no longer in my view
Magnetic repulsion like how Magneto pushed away Logan in "Days of Future Past" -
When you are tearing you hair out trying to figure out why the PR you're reviewing isn't working. Then you realize you forgot to pull the latest changes!
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QA to Android Dev : "the app just force closed"
Android Dev : giving a Darth Vader look pretending to use the force.
QA : "won't work on me, i have the FORCE CLOSE" -
Why does the biggest mobile money payment system in our country have such crappy documentation! Arghh
And they tell us to read the DOCUMENTATION it has all the answers -
My lead developer insists that an analytics value of "requestURL" should be window.document.location(which is an object) because in the analytics API doc it says this field "should be location of the current page, most probably window.document.location". Is she right?
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Jest/enzym unit testing: My lead developer says using shallowWithStore instead of shallow on one incidence would introduce CPU overhead thus I MUST stop whatever I'm doing and fix the pull request. Is that normal?
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You know it's Friday afternoon when your interface is broken because you tried to set the type to the string 'string' instead of the keyword string.
Interface IEnvironment {
name: 'string',
...
} -
Does it say something about a company if many of the devs in the team are employee-turned-consultants kept working in the same role?6
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Which should I choose:
Company A: much better pay and benefits, team seems nice, Glassdoor citing quite bad reviews about CEO and upper management.
Company B: current company. uninteresting field, team in distance, tech lead likes micro management and quite annoying in general. In middle of a project.5 -
I'm using Fedora 25/ pre-release, and It's rock solid except for wifi hotspot and I don't need it.
Now my school gave me a Windows 10 pro key, and I'm hesitant.
Should I install it ?
Will I need it ?5 -
Whether baked or no-bake, a strawberry cheesecake is a showstopper that combines the creamy richness of the cheesecake with the sweet and slightly tangy essence of strawberries. It’s a classic dessert choice for celebrations, springtime gatherings, or any occasion where the irresistible combination of cream cheese and fresh strawberries is sure to be a crowd-pleaser.
No-Bake Strawberry Cheesecake Recipe:
Here’s a simple recipe for a no-bake strawberry cheesecake:
Ingredients For Strawberry Cheesecake:
For the Crust:
1 1/2 cups graham cracker crumbs
1/3 cup melted butter
2 tablespoons granulated sugar
Cheesecake Filling:
16 oz (450g) cream cheese, softened
1 cup powdered sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 1/2 cups fresh strawberries, hulled and diced
2 tablespoons lemon juice
Strawberry Topping:
1 cup fresh strawberries, hulled and sliced
1/4 cup strawberry jam or preserves
Instructions For Strawberry Cheesecake:
Prepare the Crust:
In a bowl, combine graham cracker crumbs, melted butter, and granulated sugar. Mix until the crumbs are evenly coated.
Press the mixture into the bottom of a 9-inch springform pan to form an even crust. Place it in the refrigerator while you prepare the filling.
Make the Cheesecake Filling:
In a large bowl, beat the softened cream cheese until smooth.
Add powdered sugar and vanilla extract, and continue to beat until well combined.
In a blender or food processor, puree the diced strawberries with lemon juice until smooth.
Fold the strawberry puree into the cream cheese mixture until evenly incorporated.
Assemble the Cheesecake:
Pour the strawberry cream cheese filling over the chilled crust in the springform pan.
Smooth the top with a spatula and refrigerate for at least 4-6 hours, or preferably overnight, to allow the cheesecake to set.
Prepare the Strawberry Topping:
In a small saucepan, heat strawberry jam or preserves over low heat until it becomes smooth and liquid.
Allow the jam to cool slightly before spreading it over the top of the chilled cheesecake.
Arrange sliced strawberries on top for decoration.
Serve:
Carefully remove the cheesecake from the springform pan before serving. Slice and enjoy! This no-bake strawberry cheesecake is a refreshing and delightful dessert that’s perfect for warm days or when you want a fuss-free, delicious treat.
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String good =
"I'll never give up type systems!!"
+ " Do you hear me?!"
+ " Never!";
bad =
"Can't believe it made it all the way into prod."
% NaN + 3 / '11'
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