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Spend half an hour finding music to listen to while I code; Pause it after 30 seconds to concentrate on refactoring. Stays paused for rest of day.
Really getting the most out of those expensive new headphones.35 -
My worst developer sin is probably me talking sh*t about programs I could never have done better myself.
"Omg, this is so inefficent!"
"Omg, the ui is so confusing!"
"What kind of idiot would do that?"
...I'm not the only one who does that, am I?10 -
programming languages are not designed to talk to computers, they are designed to be readable by other programmers.
please code like it.7 -
devRant, the only positive and supportive online community for programmers.
until you mention an OS.
then all bets are off.16 -
dad: what the hell do you do again?
me 1st time asked: I'm a back end web developer, i write the code you don't see that makes things you do see work.
me 90,000th time: internet stuff.
me 83,881,178th time: computers!4 -
When you get a day off and you want to work on a personal project, but your spouse has other plans.
8 -
Got some swag in the mail today.
I was told I could get a refund for the hat if it was too small. I literally have the biggest head in the world and it fits me fine.
For those who complained, did you try taking it off and on again?
6 -
I have a little Gradle,
It's slow as f*king sin,
And when I'm on a deadline,
It loves to sit and spin.
Oh, Gradle, Gradle, Gradle,
It takes all goddamn day,
I guess I'll make some Ramen,
'Coz Gradle loves to play.
/rant9 -
interviewer: What can you tell us about the Unity 3D engine?
me: well, i can tell you that there is no such thing. the engine is called Unity. Unity3d.com is just the website. it's a good way of telling if someone doesn't know what they are talking about.
interviewer:😐....9 -
My worst dev sin is not throwing people under the bus, even when they deserve it.
Literally or metaphorically? I'll leave that up to the imagination.
------
I believe my second-worst sin is my tendency towards perfectionism. It's hard to finish projects quickly if everything has to be nearly perfect. I still make deadlines, but this is due to overworking, thus leading to burnout.
I could relax more if only I sacrificed my principles...5 -
devRant is a place to rant. Not a journal of best practices.
Can I just rant without giving a long winded backstory?
Do I have to explain myself to prevent people from commenting that the problem must be me?
If you read a rant, and you can't relate to it sympathetically.
Move along! That rant is not for you!
When people are trying to vent no one wants to see your snippy little comment about how 'unprofessional' they are being.8 -
client: the math on this investment calculator you made is wrong.
me: ok, how is it wrong?
client: one of our salesmen sais it not calculating correctly.
me: that's fine. i just need an example, or the corrected formula to use.
client: on this other website we put in the same information and it comes out different.
me: ok, let me investigate... this other site adds a fee every month so the output is different. If i turn that off the calculations are the same. would you like to add a monthly fee field?
clients: no, the calculator is working how we want then.
repeat 5 times at 3 month intervals.
client: the interest calculator is broken again. didn't we just fix it?
me: it was never broken. your people just can't math.3 -
🤠:Hello, I need a website for my professional website. But anything more than $500 is unrealistic.
Translation
🤡:I am a stupid assclown that the future will leave behind and time will forget.22 -
Pair programing on project with friend.
We both feel like the other person is doing all the work and we are not really helping.
Twice the developer power, twice the imposter syndrome.1 -
see you in hell mac mini, the raspberry pi is taking your place connected to the tv.
when $25 of Linux out performs $300 of apple.3 -
In the project management system we use with our clients I see file named, 'instructions for backup.'
I open the file and all it contains is my name and phone number.😑4 -
I have a lifetime membership to Lumosity. Not just do they know my time of death, but with auto renewal turned on I have confirmation of reincarnation. At least once, then existence is null.
2 -
Colleagues sharing passwords.That was a big fat NO when I was a sysadmin - and for a good reason. But now, since I'm closer to development, it feels like no one really cares about the passwords. If I tell my colleague I'll take 10 minutes more because I can't log in, he OFFERS me his credentials. And sends them over saying "in case you need it". [the next day the same colleague was complaining his account is locked out. Oh, wonders! How on Earth...!]
But seriously, password sharing is a serious problem. I would fire the person on spot if I caught him sharing his credentials! This is the 8th deadly sin! IDC if they are for non-prod. Most people reuse their passwords in multiple systems, and even non-prod envs can bring the prod down! Or worse - install a trojan.15 -
Purchase $900 laptop, it's not powerful enough so I return it and get $1,100 laptop, still not powerful enough, return it and get $1,600 laptop. Realize I have a gaming PC and don't need the laptop this powerful and I return it and repurchase the first laptop I bought with a $100 discount because it's now an opened-box, but I know for a fact that it was the one that I got in the first place and opened.
Thanks Best Buy.3 -
I want to vomit everytime rich people in upper management says stupid shit like "working for money in this company is a sin. Work for higher reason"
Hello, if only I get paid as much as you earn just by talking random nonsense in every meeting, I would be glad sharing the same shit quote like that to other employees in the company.17 -
Coffee and wine are my life coaches.
Start of day
☕coffee: GO GET THEM TIGER!
End of day
🍷Wine: you'll get them tomorrow.1 -
My IT team installed Antivirus on my 5 year old Mac Mini due to company security policy after the recent Ransomware attacks.
Now my Mac is slow as fuck. They are not even providing me new Mac, due to budget constraints. Totally fucked.
Fuck Ransomware. Fuck security policies. Fuck my company. Fuck everyone. Fuck everything. 😤9 -
Boss: I don't want you spending more than 30 min looking into the problem.
Me: ok
Go back to desk and read or watch some cs training. Maybe related.
Go back to boss.
Me: going to take (over estimate tome) to fix.
Boss: ok.
Go back to desk and fix in less time than estimated.
Look like gold.3 -
accedently used chmod on chmod so i no longer had permissions to chmod.
thank goodness for remote server images.5 -
Add no comments or documentations whatsoever during my initial years of coding (when actually I used to write code worse than a constipated elephant's shit).. In my mind I would be like "This is quite clear-cut.. A first grader will be able to understand this code.."
But then I had to debug my own code barely some 1-2 months later and I figured out the importance of good comments and documentation..3 -
Friday: Finally the week end. I haven't seen my family all week.
Sunday: Hurry up Monday! Get me away from these people. I need to program.1 -
me: do we need to setup the shop to charge a flat shipping rate, or charge per item?
🕛3 hours later.
client: yes, that is correct.
me: 😧2 -
Internet stopped working yesterday and the ISP company told me they couldn't send a person for a week!
I'm stuck at home, I have to have internet.
Long story short, I got no sleep last night and I may have voided my routers warranty, but I got internet.8 -
Well, my dev sin is...
Basically every project of mine is not commented, is not unit tested and doesn't have any kind of documentation.
But I try to remove my bad habit!1 -
My worst dev sin was leaving out the 'WHERE' in a SQL update statement on a production database
Set every booking to be owned by the same sales consultant 👀2 -
" this page uses cookies"
"We've updated our privacy policy"
*30 sec full screen ad* OR "please turn off your adblocker and refresh"
"Would you like to take a survey?"
"Click to read more"
"You've reached your free articles for the month. Please subscribe!"
Jesus fucking Christ! Is it such a sin to read articles in peace? How does anybody use your shitty site. How does anybody PAY for your shitty site?! Fuck your articles. Why do companies think this is a good model?!5 -
It's not a bug if a feature is working how you told me it should work but not how you wanted it to work.6
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Go to Denver with a friend for an Iron Maiden concert. I try edibles for the first time, which of course means take way too much. Hallucinate that lead singer is an arm flailing inflatable tube Man. I have a pretty good time. Walk back to the motel at midnight and have to launch a client's website from stage to production on the slow Motel Wi-Fi. I'm ready to pass out at this point, but I got my laptop, and I got my VPN running. So I spend the next 6 hours moving the site from one server to another while occasionally passing out for 20 to 30 minutes at a time.
One of the best road trips of my life. Five stars would do again.2 -
i love programming, but have done too many 12 hour days recently.
spent last two days recharging by doing nothing but play the new Doom game.
i have a great job so my boss supports me.5 -
Finished the hacktober fest yesterday.. fastest 5 PRs I've ever made on my repos, I actually forgot to sign up at the beginning of the month.. I pity those who are following me.
9 -
It's not always true that degree holders hate self-taught developers. Sometimes, it's the other way around. When somebody mentions he gained a cs degree, he sometimes gets hate, too, hearing "degrees are useless! yadayada..." like it's a sin to have one. We should never stop learning whether we have a degree or not, and we should stop this hate and divided culture.18
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Since my first high salary dev job in 2018 and until 2021, despite all my attempts to explain, my mom thought that I’m not actually a programmer but rather a scammer that just makes companies pay me salary for nothing. The argument that being a legit programmer is way easier than being a scammer mastermind fell on deaf ears.
Do you know why I said she thought so until 2021? Because I stopped talking to her in 2021 when she said that “being bisexual is a sin” and “I want to stop treating my cancer to die as soon as possible just to not see you anymore” after my coming out.4 -
Just picked up some freelance work because someone recognized my dev rant shirt.
Devrant has become a cabal.5 -
#include "somefile.c"
My teacher: "Including a .c file instead a .h header is a mortal sin."
This was long ago, so I believe gcc has already forgiven me.2 -
Greatest dev sin.... oh god there’s been a few over the years.
Hmm 🤔
I guess one of the top 5 would be making an ecommerce platform without unit testing or documentation for the front or backend. 🤫
Mind you it runs smoothly to this day so I was doing something right 😦1 -
When you see what worked for someone else with a similar issue on GitHub and run it.
Trust me, I hope I know what I'm doing too.
1 -
😸:oh hi, i came in early to checkout this game, but i was just about to get off and start work.
😎:I'm not your boss. I don't caire what you do.
👺:I am your boss, and as long as you get the work done, on time, and done well, I don't care if it looks lie you are doing nothing but being paid to play games. If anyone does bother you about playing games at work let me and I will let them know to leave you alone.3 -
@dfox
Only 2 rants an hour.
Ok
How about the ability to save and manually post later feature?
I had an idea for a rant. It was gold i tells ya... if only I could remember what it was. 😥8 -
That awkward moment, when u watch last episode first and believe it to be the first episode..
Thank you "Order by Name".
Aptly named - "Alpha and omega". Gonna be my beginning and end episode 😂
5 -
Biggest sin is writing code without taking into account clean coding and just doing what ever is necessary to make the code work6
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i have been fortunate enough to always work with awesome people.
both jobs I have had after college had almost no supervision, and I could come and go as I pleased.
I am a professional, and I loved being treated as one. I don't take advantage of my work, and they don't take advantage of me.2 -
Would you rather program one handed because...
A). Broken arm.
B). Holding screaming baby that slaps keyboard occasionally.6 -
Thirty hours over two weeks, but we finally patched a angular app that was originally built on 2 (alpha) to 4, reducing the load time ten fold.
Don't thank me, thank super duck. The duck with the power to debug any code.
Gawd I'm tired.
2 -
My mother disowned me when I told you I was bisexual. She told me she had cancer but will refuse to treat it because she wanted to die as soon as possible just to not see me and think of me.
I asked her what’s wrong with being bisexual and her only argument was “it’s a sin”.
I did my coming out on Jan 30 2021, the day SOPHIE died. When it comes to my relationship with my mother, nothing have changed since.22 -
who has used a screw driver to connect the prongs to turn on a computer without a case/power button?7
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What's a bigger sin.
Returning a status code of 200 and then the message body saying "An Error Occurred"
or
Only performing data validation on the frontend.18 -
Sins? I don't want to keep you up all night, so here are some highlights.
Fucking with clients and employers who fuck with me first, or waste my time.
Occasionally not documenting my code (I'm actually pretty good about this), then bitching about poorly documented code.
Honestly wishing other people in the office would *actually* explode, or die engulfed in flames.
Working drunk and/or stoned.
Getting pissed off when I have to do something in a stupid way, or use a workflow that I don't like.
Seriously fucking up out of either arrogance or stupidity, then blaming it on something else.
Zoning out, skipping work, or sleeping in and billing for it (see sin #1).
But my greatest sin? That honor's got to go to becoming a developer in the first place.
I wasn't always a professional asshole, but I fucking am now.1 -
tl;dr - My company makes me pass around code over email. Is this normal?
How we fix bugs at my company.
1. Simulate bug in dev env (ok, cool)
2. Get the required code from svn and make changes locally (so far, so good)
3. Deploy changes in dev env and test (yeah!)
4. Take screenshots of fix in action along with the files you've changed and mail it to the respective leads (really? send code via mail?)
5. Keep changing your fix based on feedback and keep repeating above steps (what!)
6. Once approval mail comes, check-in your code in the svn branch for deployment and testing in the test env (QA team)
My question to you fine folks is, is this normal? Is this how most companies work? Passing around code over e-mail? Where the different versions of your fix are just attachments in emails. Or have I committed a sin by being a part of this heinous act?9 -
In fact I'm a sinful dev, so that I can't easily decide which one is worst. From indenting with tabs, or using nano instead of vim/emacs, to hardcoding database credentials on server, to many hacks and workarounds I use as actual "fixes" when the deadline is upon me and I've tried all I could. But it always led only to my own regret. For instance, my latest sin was that I prefered Debian over Arch and used proprietary graphic drivers to speed up my new setup. But ended up with a curse from St. Ignucius. (check my last rant)
But my worst sin probably goes to when I was "printf-debugging" some issue for a GSM controller on a raspberry pi. I forgot to remove one little print line and deployed the new "fixed" version. I didn't follow that project after that for like a month or so, when the client posted back the device and said that "it just doesn't work anymore". It seemed that raspbian didn't boot beacause the sd card was curroptted. I dd'ed through the card and I noticed that there are billions of lines of "DEBUG:: reading stream from 192.some.shitty.ip", took almost all over the 32G sdcard. Just as I suddenly remembered the cursed line I just added a month ago, I declared the sd card dead with no hesitation, dunce-commented the line (so the history would remember), implemented a time out for the thread containing it, setup a journald unit for my service and removed the redirection of process output to a log file, found a new sd card and installed everything again, and finally posted back the new "fix" to the client.
Moral: Never comfort yourself for the sins you have commited in the past kids, they certainly will come back to you. And also not to do any io especially write to a file on an SD card with ext fs, in a potentially infinite loop with no timeout.
P.S: I'd posted my last rant just before the new week rant last nigh. I really liked the St. Ignucius meme so decided to create a new one. He's very adorable :)
1 -
The first time you try to google what an operator does by using the symbol in the search bar because you don't know the name for it.
2 -
Got the cheapest laptop I could find that would run Windows mixed reality.
Installed Linux subsystem for Windows and Ubuntu.
Nothing but giant flying terminal windows across my view of a virtual Seascape.
This is my new home.4 -
This right here is all I need to remind me that I don't want to work for anyone but myself anymore. These whiteboard interviews are so pointless and stupid.
https://theoutline.com/post/1166/...
9 -
Was having a Good day , My code was compiling, Android Studio did find the fucking 'R' In his goddamn libraries and eventually got my strong coffee by my desk.
Suddenly i'm hit up with one of Noob friends saying that he installed Windows on His MacBook Air...
My ears and eyes starting bleeding and all that came in my mind was why the heck did you do this, why the heck did you coat your Chocolate truffle with the fucking Mud. Why didn't you just hammered the keyboard and the screen before doing . I had to sleep after this and all that i saw in my dreams was fucking apples and windows.
Please for God's sake don't do this , wouldn't be a sin more deep than this one
4 -
I am so fucking sick of people being such shits to people who don't know things. Ignorance is not a sin.3
-
Reviewing code for applications after not working on it for six months.
Client: so what is the first step to adding our new feature.
Me: I really think we need to redo the entire architecture from the ground up. It won't work any differently than it does now, but the code will be cleaner.
Client:😓
Me:😅3 -
My first dev project was making a small 3D engine in GameMaker 7 when I was 14. I had been using gamemaker for two years then but I never got past the "platformer movement and collisions" and "top down movement and collisions"
It was the first thing I made myself without following a tutorial and spend quite a few afternoons at school to ask my Math teacher to explain things like sin cos and tan. Words I saw on the internet but did not understand.1 -
"'This is just a temporary fix, I'll refactor it into something great and modular later" thought I as I continued to sin for the umpteenth time.
-
Dear YouTube,
If you want me to fucking watch your fucking same ad every fucking 2 minutes, I will fucking fuck watch those fucking ads on my fucking TV.
Fed up. Moving to YouTube magisk ad-free module. Fuck off YouTube. Recently you became to greedy.
Fuck off.8 -
squashed a spider this evening just to have it erupt with hundreds of tiny baby spiders.
what a terrifying real world visualization of my week.2 -
Spending hours trying to solve a problem just to find that the answer was not just simple, but well known. You just didn't know the technical term to search for.1
-
Used a String as a Boolean
First sin of the year
😂😂😂
Ps:Android studio wont let me use int or boolean,it was suggesting to use respective arrays as it was inside a loop
2 -
Im gonna commit a cardinal sin here, but i like windows. It's maybe not as flexible as linux, but dammit i do not have the time to meddle with my os all day.12
-
Looks like I'm @dfox evil twin.
class nerd-san extends dfox {
constructor() {
evil = true;
sunglasses = true;
}
}
2 -
My physics teacher would call it a sin. Technically enough for wk81 xD
Yeah, i coded an entire NN on paper while physics lesson. Worked pretty well. Except it doesnt work yet :/ Compiler errors because of some referenncing issues1 -
disadvantage of using noise canceling headphones.
boss comes in from other room. more amused than annoyed
👺:Is there a reason you are letting out a loud burp and a fart every couple minutes that i can hear through the walls?
🙊:Oh!? now I understand why my deaf friends are so oblivious to why the rest of us start laughing for 'no reason' when we go out to dinner with them. -
I have a confession to make.. I have sin.. after 8 years of coding in the dark I've joined the light..
How did this happen? Well whenever I would decide to change my dark theme to another dark theme in VSCode, normally I would arrive at the light themes in the list, and for some reason the reading felt more pleasing to my eyes, so I started researching as to whats the best theme for the eye, and why does the light theme feel "more right"?
So it turns out that there isn't any difference for the eye, but that maybe because of the white paper black letters the eye finds it easier to focus on the letters rather than visa versa.
And here I am coding in the light for a month now and it feels great I guess?
Keep in mind I was one of those that would see light theme users as mudbloods and muggles. But I can't deny that the light theme + blue filter makes my eyes more rested.8 -
Let he who is without sin static_cast<Projectile>(firstStone);
I’m not gonna pretend I’ve never forgotten about a small placeholder in my UI, but do I win something for finding this?
3 -
Xperia Flashtool? More like Xperia Fucktool. Why? BECAUSE THE FUCKING THING CAN'T FLASH MY PHONE. FIRST YOU SPIT INTO MY FACE WHEN NOT DETECTING A COMPLETELY FINE .FTF, THEN YOU SHIT ON MY HEAD BY SAYING THAT THE .SIN FILE IS INVALID, AND THEN YOU PISS INTO MY MOUTH BY JUST REBOOTING THE DEVICE! Old version works fine tho.3
-
Editing java files on server for deployment.
Deployed. Found major issue.
Don't have time. Editing source code on server changed if else
Rebuild and deploy.
Now push from server to repo and pull locally...
Pure sin. -
my farther, it took me three hours to teach him how to use a mouse, and complains about not being able to find the free WiFi (he expects it to be something physical he can walk up to and take).
but whe he finds out the Internet has porn he (by himself without instructions) hacks the senior community center's router to bypass the porn filter.3 -
You have 10 notices that your rant had gotten a ++, but the total score has only gone up by one.
😒2 -
"In a closed society where everybody is guilty, the only crime is getting caught. In a world of thieves, the only final sin is stupidity."
― Hunter S. Thompson -
How can an online marketing company work without any web developer? How can they look at their costumers' face and pretend to represent their communication using basic mailchimp and DESIGNING HTML WITH MS OFFICE? Can someone explain me why should anyone think a NEWSLETTER MADE OF FUCKING TABLES works just fine? Why spend money on inadequate software and shitty plans instead of using it for hire a good developer? They don't even understand the fucking mailchimp anyways, why pay for something you don't know how to use and then BLAME OTHERS WHEN STARTS RAINING SHIT BECAUSE OF YOUR DECISIONS?? I got nothing against salesman, and I believe ignorance is not a sin, but when those two elements merge, a fucking stupid raises in glory and I get to work three or four times more than if they just used common sense for once.2
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When your teacher tells you to run a model that uses a 1gb dataset on a computer that has 256 mb ram.
Ah, what sin have I done, my lord? :/ -
i understand and accept why some people prefer mac.
every mac i have ever used has shit the bed during normal use. while windows and Linux machines have too, however less frequently. unlike mac there is always something i can personally do about it to fix the problem.
i like having complete control over my computer and don't like the idea of paying a premium to be told how i can or can't use it.6 -
When facebook and youtube adds are nothing but clients you built websites for.😒
Someone needs to update their algorithm to more than just 'how many times you visited a website before.' -
Guess it's time to ditch ProtonMail as well.
Translation: "[Update Google play services.] ProtonMail won't work until you have updated Google Play Services."
I know I'm almost an anti-Google nazi at this point, but ProtonMail was one of the only remaining apps not needing Google to work, and now it's a "sin equa non" condition. I'm very disappointed. Guess I'll have to switch this address to Tutanota or host my own email server.
Edit: why the fuck would my autocorrect capitalize nazi?
13 -
I'm still performing the sin that got me into my first real programming language:
Bukkit Plugins ...13 -
Biggest sin
Due to lack of time, I named all the variables in my project without logic,
Like temp1,str1, function dojson etc
Lord be with the dev who's gonna work on that project
PS I am not a bad person, it is the time that made do such things -
Manny a developer has been foiled by a single random misplace punctuation mark hiding in a million lines of code.3
-
I would rather go through a burning building than doing a single line of code that is for test automation in Salesforce. Salesforce is the biggest sin of humanity.12
-
Sooooooo…. The other day I committed a change with this message:
“Committing the ultimate sin in committing secret keys again however this repo is and will always be private and my pis will be hidden on my network so it shouuuuuuld be fine... right...”7 -
Client sends screenshots, compressed, and shrunk down to an unreadable size, inside a docx file.
Just... just no. Where is a spray bottle or a rolled up newspaper when you need one.
(For you three people who are going to comment 'why don't you just teach them...' ssssssssssshut up, some people are just unteachable ( for you other three who are going to say 'everyone is teachable.' Not true, if it was you wouldn't be saying such things.))1 -
Overheard near the water cooler:
"My religion considers using interpreted languages to be a sin."
Someone here really hates the internet then...2 -
Biggest sin? Easy. Pushed directly to master branch and deployed to prod. I should mention it was something very small before I get crucified😂
-
Oh BASIC night, the LEDs are brightly glinting;
It is the night of the dear GOSUB’s birth!
Long lay the world in sin and error printing,
Till you appeared and the RAM felt its worth.
Shiver of fear, line numbers do inspire,
For yonder breaks a mostly harmless GOTO.
Fall on your bits, O hear the Visual voices!
O BASIC divine, O BASIC where GOTO was born!
O BASIC, O Holy BASIC, O BASIC, you’re mine!
Some want to say, “GOTO is harmful always,”
But what of them, in their post-modern world.
We PRINT the truth, in the line-numbered goodness,
But Dijkstra appeared, and the faith, it was lost.
A thrill of hope, when .NET BASIC announces,
But Visual BASIC, what kind of thing are you?
Fall on your GUI, O see the old line numbers!
Behold BASICA, O BASIC when DOS was born!
O numbers, O lines, spaghetti divine!
Source: http://changelog.complete.org/archi...2 -
I might have just git-committed the cardinal developer sin: not multiplying estimates by 3. Torvalds help me!
So a php app I developed a few months ago when I was first starting as a dev needs an upgrade. Pretty simple since I've known about said upgrade for a while, but the feature was never needed until today.
Told my boss it would take a day or two of refactoring and additions for it to work.
How screwed am I?4 -
I don't care about your good ideas.
If you don't code, don't art, have nothing to contribute to the work, and aren't going to pay me for my time, then there is no collaboration.1 -
Love Squirrel Girl, the super hero with the powers of a squirrel, and a degree in computer science.
4 -
I already forgot what are the different sorting algorithms I learned last week. I already forgot sin, cos, tan, log, and some Math concepts in school. How not to forget these things easily? I could recall them once I see a sample and a brief explanation.4
-
https://youtu.be/2VkNWLYD5c4
What this? Kids who use tablets and technology have IMPROVED fine motor skills over those who do not.
How can this be? Everything the new generation has that older generations did not is always the worst thing ever.3 -
For fuck's sake, why do so many engineering professors use Comic Sans in their power points and documents?!? These are incredibly intelligent people, so how can they be so ignorant? We all have to suffer as a result... Honestly, has nobody ever had the balls to tell them to change their fucking font because it is ugly as sin, hurts the eyes, and is super childish? Fuck all those people who insist on using Comic Sans. You all deserve to spend time burning in hell for your cruelty. Better yet - sir who invented Comic Sans: go fuck yourself and burn in hell.9
-
The school I went to, and this was really the only benefit of the school, gave all it students lifetime memberships to digital tutors, which was bought out by pluralsight, which then bought code School. So I basically got free membership to three different sites, all of which have a good amount of technical training with videos, guides, and work along lessons on them.
For what school cost to me, it will have paid for itself as long as I live for another Thousand Years.1 -
Spent two hours having two recruiters give me test, interviewing, and being told HOW perfect I am for the job I was applying for; Just to be told they are only allowed to send over people they have found previous work for, but I should instead apply to these othwr positions that pay half what I'm looking for.
-
My biggest sin is overshooting the problem - developing something "with the future in mind" which ends up way more complicated than it should be.
It works, works great, but nobody can maintain it because of the complexity, and because I usually write no comments in these situations.
But hey! At least I'm aware of it and working on fixing it in me.3 -
VR is great. Been getting together weekly with my dungeon and dragon friends from highschool but instead of meeting in person we get together in vr.
Feels just like getting together in person but is more convenient since we each connect from our own homes.2 -
Hello and welcome come to hell for developers. Take a seat at any open computer.
You may have noticed we did away with the fire and brimstone.
Instead we just have you maintain the legacy code from your first job.
It's genrally html, php, javascript, and css all on the same page and all mixed together.
We would say have fun, but that's not really the point. -
"There is a reason that we keep our variables private. We don’t want anyone else to depend on them. We want to keep the freedom to change their type or implementation on a whim or an impulse. Why, then, do so many programmers automatically add getters and setters to their objects, exposing their private variables as if they were public?"
-Uncle Bob, Clean Code.1 -
talking about people with computer preferences i don't understand.
i sometimes forget i use a mechanical roller ball mouse for work and play.
which one? just google it, these are so out of fashion there are only three different models currently for sale anywhere that i can find.
6 -
I need to stop adding, weep uncontrollably, between tasks in my work to do list before my coworkers start thinking I'm serious.
Technically I am serious - you would be too if you had to manage the servers I inherited - but I don't want to ruin the all powerful Wizard of Oz vibe I got going.1 -
Getting a new laptop is exhausting if you haven't been keeping up with the technology. I have purchased three laptops in the last two weeks returning the first two after spending 10 + hours each installing updates and software just to find out they didn't work for what I needed.1
-
I'm developing a new (just for fun) programming language and I'm wondering what features I should add next? These features are already implemented:
- Printing text
- Variables
- user-input
- Datatype conversion (String, Int, Float, Bool, List, Dictionary)
- lists/arrays
- dictionaries
- Sorting
- Shuffling
- random numbers & choices
- Math stuff like: log, abs, floor, ceiling, sin, etc...
- Time & Date
- Working with files
- If-else statements
- Ternary operators
- Loops (for & while)
- Functions
- Classes
- Error handling
- Importing libraries & other scripts
- Arrow/callback functions
- Escaping (\)
is there anything you often use missing?11 -
My biggest dev sin is premature optimization. I'll try to produce the best possible code without the need for it to be there. I will waste my time thinking of wierd edge cases that can be handled with a simple if-else, but why not tweak the algo to handle them internally.
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Confession!!
Ohh Lord, Please forgive me. Today I committed a sin and tomorrow I will have to commit it again. I wrote a shitty code and will have to write it tomorrow also. I am so ashamed of myself. I promise, I will refactor the code before releasing it for code review. My excuse for doing the sin is that I want to make it work first, it is little complex. I hope, if someone will stumble on it, then that person will not judge me by few shitty snippets I wrote to make it work.
Thanks,
An embarrassed programmer3 -
Code editors as Doom skill levels:
coda = I'm too young to die.
notepad++ = Hey, not to rough.
sublime = Hurt me plenty.
vi = Ultra-Violence.
emacs = Nightmare!3 -
Ohh god kill me!! Instructing to edit the project on the last hour is the biggest sin someone could ever commit!! Fuck clients.1
-
When client budget is less than the time needed to do a good jobs.
Happens more than I like.
"We’ve all said we’d go back and clean it up later. Of course, in those days we didn’t know LeBlanc’s law: Later equals never."
-Clean Code1 -
Dev sin: when you're too lazy to configure ufw (uncomplicated firewall) so you just shut it down instead 😓
-
From the day I was born,
Till the day I'll die!!
Every action that I perform,
Is a party if my sin!!
This may not be story of a Dev,
But this is the story of mine!! -
any time i come up with a cleaver solution to a problem I remember my cousin who works for nasa and i mope about how I've waisted my life and nothing i do matters.5
-
I was not such a coffee person, but now at work, I really get it.
it's a sin to say bad about Coffee as a developer.3 -
Buying a brand new laptop, I think I'll save some money and get an i5 instead of an i7 and then turn around the next day and decide I hate money and I love having a computer that's more powerful than I need it to be.7
-
I cleaned up my desk and decluttered everything to freshen things up.
It's much nicer to have a clean desk especially when a desk is the only 'office' in your business.
It's not perfect, but it's much better than before :)
PS: I wouldn't dare to share the mess it was and burn it through your eyes... It'd be a sin.
6 -
Spend the same amount of time looking for and testing existing npm packages as it would take to build something from scratch.
Nothing yet, but Boss is still certain that building our own is unnecessary.
😐 -
This book I'm reading on SEO is like drinking nightquil.
The more I read the harder it gets to not pass out.6 -
I personally don't have a funny dev sin story (not that I didn't commit any).
My internship colleague should update a value of a row in production. So he wrote a SQL command and forgot the where clause. This was the first time the company tested there rollback mechanism and it didn't work. For the next 2 weeks my colleague was busy updating 2000ish rows to make it work again -
At my first programming job, the codebase was a tangle of legacy web forms, MVC, templates in a content-management-system, and AngularJS. Learning the CMS was particularly stressful.
One Saturday night, after binge-watching videos of DOOM 2 speedruns and mods, I had a dream that the Icon of Sin from DOOM 2 appeared in the code, gazed at me menacingly, and lunged at me before I woke up.1 -
My biggest ongoing sin is that I neglect commenting while maintaining a legacy system. No one else has commented anything so why should I? Well I should. I comfort my self with the fact that this legacy system will be replaced with a shiny new well commented one in the near future, which im also working on.
-
Another cardinal sin: i use cortana. And she is useful. Get the pitchforks and torches you can send me to hell i have to maintain legacy php applications im acustomed to it.6
-
I would give myself so much shit for this.
Sales cloud architect, if I needed the money.
I give sales so much shit, like you've got no idea how much shit. I almost lost my job because I called the sales team at my job "soulless husks of meat and sin".
It's not an easy job but damn I was really fucking good at it.
If money was no problem, I would probably become a restoration artist.
I love to restore old homes, furniture, tvs, radios, etc. -
This is a group sin.
We'd get the code checked and then run it straight to live. No test environments no real back up in place or process for releasing.
Just run code in if it broke run fix 1 through 3 until you got it right. That was two years ago. -
"I don't think anyone will mind if we update and make all old code incompatible."
- every reat/soap service the day after you finish development. -
Didn't learn to code till late 20's
Always wanted to program since I was a little kid but was discouraged by everyone I ever talked to about it as it being 'too difficult .'
Finally had an awsome college professor that took special interest to encourage me to go after it. -
"Oh computer, your real name should be porn funnel. I love my family more than you, but only collectively. on a case by case basis I love you more than any individual family member. "
-Nerd 'robot chicken' -
when i brought the vive home the wife was all, meah😒, at first then, 😲 oh my goodness this is the halo deck, our future is an empty room with vr goggles.
-
on live server
me: these root server files have loose permissions.
sudo chmod -rf 644 /*
me: well... 'cd' works, but nothing else. -
Dear clients
Websites are not a turnkey business.
Your site is going to need maintenance overtime. And you are going to need to pay for it. -
In case you haven't heard:
https://change.org/p/...
Heh... Talk about making a lot of dev enemies...
Am I allowed to do this?9 -
Real question, not troll. There is debate about it and I really can't figure it out.
Besides having the title software "engineer," is there really such a thing as a software engineer?
In the US, to be an engineer you have to be regularly tested by a regulated governing body, apprentice under another engineer for years, and be certified on a state level. Whereupon you are personally liable for your designs being FREE from errors.
For one thing, nobody can write bug free code, and the idea of being personally responsible for each bug is terrifying.
And two, I've seen news of people calling themselves software engineers in the USA and Canada and getting a cease and desist or sued for it, despite any level of qualification.
I'm sure there are engineers, especially electrical, computer engineers who also program.
But... ?
I don't know, I can't say either way.
That's why I'm asking.9 -
See now why I understand that in essence given a vector (parameters), you modify weights and biases minimally and these get passed through a set of dropoff style layers like ReLU and that in the end each layer leading to an output will basically sum up to a value that goes through sigmoid and concurrently equals the value desired once trained..... i don't see how this could cover all bases when parts of the math used to calculate the output is trigonemetric and polynomial. I mean not complex math ! Real basic things in my case, but a polar from cartesian coordinate conversion, angle and leg size, etc all going into determining that a target equals a landing zone and if not how to move things to it.
Is there something I'm missing where you kind of model the math because at best sin and cos could be a power series.77 -
Done it once or twice when finishing up a feature for a presentation/delivery the next day.
I'm leaning on the side of Not Worth It because I'd rather not be sleep deprived and dumb in brainy brain when interacting with the client and demoing my other stuff.
I guess it's usually when my perfectionism flares up that I'm likely to do stuff like that.
Will consider an all-nighter if it's reeeally necessary but there's few scenarios I can imagine where that is warranted. Maybe when working on a very serious security flaw or something of that nature. Most stuff can wait a couple of days...
Edit: goddamn I guess I committed the sin of not really answering the question. There's no story here. Boooo. Permission to hate myself, captain? -
My dev sin is eating too much at spoons and feeling too bloated to concentrate at work for the afternoon
-
Cold-brewed yerba mate, iced brewed crio bru, Adderall, duck.
I believe I have everything that I need to hit those deadlines before break.
1 -
Working with friend and using nodejs websockets and SVG to build online multiplayer lazer screen arcade like games.
The only delay is having to stop every couple of minutes to restate how cool this is. -
Worst sin ever was during a workplace hackathon.
Being ultra competitive I decided the other teams build script was too functional, ie. It worked. Changing it to
.echo please accept our warmest contrafibularitiea and have a nice day
...and commit gained more than a little (deserved) approbrium. -
Not purging my senior devs code from missing curly branches earlier. Maybe not my worst sin, but DAMN DO I REGRET IT NOW.
-
write comment about posters preference of device or OS.
close eyes and imagine the meaningless flame war that would follow.
delete comment.
feel good about choice.
good for me. -
for on the go developinh I have completely replaced my laptop with my phone and a folding Bluetooth keyboard.
It can really do anything my laptop did, and if needed I can just remote desktop into my pc or ssh into a server.2 -
How do you know ML and AI has gone too far? You rely on the algorithm instead of the obvious.
Google will translate comments, etc. At times when you click on an English video to language around your location. This is so obvious, if I didn't understand English if would not have clicked on the video!!
#BringBackThePreMLdevs -
Tell client we need to add an hour to the budget to test, QA, and proof account/password emails to be sent to over 2000 customers.
They say they tested it and to send now.
Charge them for an additional four hours to test, QA, and proof apology emails because client's api was sending broken passwords.1 -
i really dislike inheriting depricated projects😓.
really wanted to use angular 2 for current project but our hosting server is outdated and nodejs wont run on it.
realy wish we could update the server, but doing this would break 10 older sites we are being paid to host .
any ideas?15 -
Craziest prep for interview :
Step 1 : Given sufficient time for the scheduled interview by any company, start by searching "How to prepare for Google interviews". Awe at the information before you and get all pumped up to jump in.
Step 2 : Starting with Algorithms, study each one and try not to mix any of them in confusion. In case you are stuck in whiteboard coding, close your eyes, take deep breath and visualize Don Kunth. If that doesn't help, well you are ruined anyway.
Step 3: Practice coding without internet connection, till you are able to write code while you talk about how the weather is really great today. Libraries and methods should flow like poetry. SO is sin.
Step 4: The X programming language which you added to your resume because you can write Hello World, head over to Wikipedia and read more about it just in case.
Step 5: Read some xkcd comics so you can impress the interviewer with some humor. You can try Dilbert too. -
I spent the last 1.5 hours trying to optimize delivery of two 8.0KB JS files. It didn't work, at all tried like everything I could find. At the end I initialized it in angular json and made it load regardless. Made me realize that it is not made for optimization.1
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Bonus semi dev related sin:
Unless it's piping hot I'll leave my coffee to get cold and then drink it. -
Worst dev sin? Perpetuating the assumption that we'll build your site for free.
In my defense, my portfolio was lacking.1 -
being 4th in line to maintain legacy code in a language I have never used before when the the last two guys were, and this is my boss telling me and not my judgment, 'incompetent.'
there are literally four functions in this class that all do the same thing... which is the one being called in this case... a seperate external function located in another file in a different language on a different server all together. 😐 -
I have been wondering about this for the whole week, but I don't remember any dev sin... or I don't want to remember it
-
My biggest regret is not becoming a programmer sooner in life. Ever since I saw the computer wore tennis shoes when I was 5 I wanted to be a computer programmer. But my brother discouraged me saying it was so difficult but no one did it. So I thought I guess if no one is doing it.... Then in both Junior High and High School they have computer classes but you had to be friends with the teacher to even know it existed in the first place. I was not on good terms with him.
Thanks to a very encouraging Teacher at Art School I finally I was able to pursue my lifelong interest in computers. -
i know i could have done this in 10 min using our current framework,
but i really wanted to learn this new framework.
only took 10 hours to figure out.
still considering it a win. -
O cursed lord of all code that is inhumanely bad, please grant me the willpower to be able to commit the sin of tolerating and writing really badly designed code. for the deadline is near and my teammates are nitwits with no moral considerations for the degenerate crap they poop out in the name of code.
-
My biggest dev sin in my rather short dev live would be my telegram bot written in node.js without any knowledge about JS. Running for almost 1 year without any error handling - oh I almost forgot I haven't documented the code - but the bot is open source, although I haven't worked on it in months1
-
There is a comic book app, let's call it 'the fucking awful crunchy roll manga app'.
Over two years, and four devices, 80% of the time it loads pages out of order, or the same three pages over and over, Making books unreadable. Reseting the app or device does not fix it. It's just random when it works.
Point being. Its a god damb gallery app! That's programing 101 shit. How dose a company this big, That does two things, stream video and display images in order, completely fuck up half of their entire market for years with no one fixing it?
I could program this thing in a week end. That's not a brag. This is almost literally a 'apps for dummies' throw away project .
Why? Just WHY?2 -
inherited management and development of a cms that is both beautiful and terrify.
when the developer nefore you was a mystic of programming that you will never be equal to.😅😟😢 -
If you don't react to this post
You may not be as Swift as I thought
But flutter wherever you like
It's not like I don't c where's that would be
C it's a plus plus situation.
Git it in your head
You should checkout your master now
who knows what sin you committed.2 -
there is no time in the budget for refactoring the code that is being shipped to live.
the only refactoring i get done is the code going into my portfolio. -
I used LDAP to get public facing employee details of my company.
Now my colleagues think that I am an hacker 😂 -
boubas say aNgEr iS cOunTerpROductIve, yet all I do is essentially manifestation of anger towards biological limitations, fundamental barriers, and death.
If I have to choose one deadly sin, I choose anger and wield it as my weapon.3 -
worst sin? 🤔
I guess not following any best practices, really bad formating, no comments, simply puting all code together just to make it work. I cry everytime I have to dig through my old codes 😫 such a shitty code, such a shitty programmer I was (am) 😔😓 -
I don't know how much use others get out of the zoom functionality in browsers.
normally i have several different browsers open with multiple windows on a single monitor with half of them zoomed to 50% so I can fit more and still see everything at once without juggling whats on top or switching desktops. -
Problem with touchscreens.
Look away from phone for a minute and when I turn back to find I somehow navigated to a settings menu.
Oh crap! Did I change anything?!
Factory reset phone just to be safe. -
did a google search for typesceipt date formating as just 'ts date'...
the results were less than helpful.1 -
Top instrumental bands to listen to while programming?
Adebisi Shank
https://music.youtube.com/watch/...5 -
My worst dev sin, I feel, is using TurboC++ even now in 2017, the graphics.h file is just too interesting.
-
I'm thinking about studying the best posts to see what is common in them, to make the perfect post and get maximun swag ¿What could be used? xd1
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