Anyone else used Stack Overflow for many years without ever asking or answering a single question?

Here in our company when you are about to do something really hard or say something clever you get to wear this hat!

"Can you put my site as the first result on google?"

I can add SEO to your site, just give me your preferred keywords, a description, and let's make sure we follow white hat best practices etc.

"No call someone at google and ask how much to go to the top of the list"

So you want to pay for ads or..?

"No get a figure I can pay to get to first page"
"Or can you just edit the google"

... And so I never renewed that contract ever again, the end.

I found it!

(Me using the CMD in class)

Schoolmate: What are you doing?

Me: Using the CMD, it makes stuff really easier.

Schoolmate(loudly): *MY NAME* is hacking the schooooool.

Ignorant idiots now I am not allowed to use my laptop in class anymore.

Three male programmers were in the bathroom standing at the urinals.

The first programmer finishes, walks over to the sink to wash his hands. He then proceeds to dry his hands very carefully. He uses paper towel after paper towel and ensures that every single spot of water on his hands is dried.

Turning to the other two, he says, "At Windows, we are trained to be extremely thorough."

The second programmer finishes his task at the urinal and he proceeds to wash his hands. He uses a single paper towel and makes sure that he dries his hands using every available portion of the paper towel.

He turns and says, "At Macintosh not only are we trained to be extremely thorough but we are also trained to be extremely efficient."

The third programmer finished and walks straight for the door, shouting over his shoulder.

"At RedHat, we don`t PISS on our hands."

My boss: "I have an idea for a very important update that we should push to all our apps ASAP."
Me: "I'm not adding a Santa hat to the icons."
My Boss: "............... Carry on"

"Amazon EC2 now offers Microsoft SQL Server 2017 with Red Hat Enterprise Linux 7.4"

We are a hosting company.

That means that we host websites and servers.

Hat does NOT mean that we manage your FUCKING APPLICATIONS.

THE NEXT FUCKING PERSON WHO'S GOING TO ASK ME APPLICATION RELATED QUESTIONS OR TRIES TO CONVINCE ME THAT IT REALLY IS A MOTHERFUCKING HOSTING ISSUE IS GOING TO GET A FUCKING FIST IN THEIR EYES.

FUCKING FUCKING FUCK.

Seen in Amsterdam, getting on a ferry.

1. I'm a programmer, that does not mean I know every possible programming language. Yes, I can build Android apps, standalone softwares, serverside frameworks. No, I do not know how to build frigging websites!

2. "You can build a website in 2 days, you're a programmer". Tell a single mechanic to build an entire car in 2 days or tell a civil engineer to build an entire building in 2 days and I'll build your website in 2 days.

AAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!
Why does your family think that being a programmer means being a magician who can just pull any kind of software, hardware, app, website out of their hat?

I found a python virus online a while ago that just corrupts your .py files, so I wanted to do something similar and after writing it I ran it on my pc, it corrupted all of my .py files.

Me: hey dev, my in-app purchase isn't reflected on other phones with your app
Dev: *cricket noises*
About a week later...
Google Play: an update for this app is available
20 minutes later...
Dev: nope, that isn't an issue.

You updated the app minutes ago after being silent for so long. No mention of it being fixed in the changelog, no mention of it being fixed in the reply.. nothing. But I'll eat my hat if you didn't silently add it in and shoved it under the rug. Dickhead.

At least the issue doesn't exist.. anymore.

Please don't be like that...

When someone tells you they're a programmer and you ask them what language they use and they say,

English.

Got some swag in the mail today.

I was told I could get a refund for the hat if it was too small. I literally have the biggest head in the world and it fits me fine.

For those who complained, did you try taking it off and on again?

My sister in law got me this guy for Christmas after I told her about devrant!

She found it in a rubber duck shop in Amsterdam.

Best sister in law!

If that strip ever works on Linux I'll eat my hat.

So red hat is now ibm hat.

In the bottom left corner of the picture there is a devRant guy with a 3 monitor setup...

However 2 monitors are the biggest multi monitor setup you can select...

*puts tinfoil hat on*

Have I just leaked the next big devRant update?

I wish my dad wouldn't bring up the cost of college to me.

Yes it costs me $12,000 to attend full time semester. Yes I'll be on $75,000 of debt by the time I graduate next year.

Why the fuck do you think older millennials aren't planning on buying homes, putting off marriage into their 30's let alone thinking about fucking kids.

It's not his fault, I love my parents. I just feel like they want me to pull a rabbit out of a hat when I'm already pushing full time work and soon full time classes.

I'm tired. 😔

I bet this is true for all of us

What if your programming language would be chosen by The Sorting Hat from Harry Potter?
You would sit like:
*please not php, please not php, please not php*

I didn't see anybody posting it yet, but the vsCode options icon has a christmas hat!

Not sure if CoreOS folks are laughing or crying (CoreOS -> Red Hat -> IBM)

Pizza-Hat

My team are the best coworkers I've had. Admittedly I'm only 4 years into my professional career, but my team makes me stay with my current job.

My team do a lot of silly things to keep everyone in a good mood, and stress free. This week we've had a game where in a quote moment you just yell the name of a primitive type (like BOOL). Why? No idea, but we're enjoying it.

We also have a chicken hat that we named Barry. He sits with people on their desk to do code reviews and such. When people leave they get their own Barry to take with them to their new job. We introduce people to him as a regular member of the team.

Sometimes work sucks. Being a developer can be hard, and can be stressful. Working with this team makes it worth it.

Am i the only one that hates Google reCAPTCHA from the body down to the soul ?

- Click the Car
- The Blue Car
- The Truck
- The Truck Bus
- The Bus Truck
- With Blue Light
- Select the Bicycles
- Skip the house
- Find the sign
- With the blue bat
- Purple pink hat
- Click Traffic light
- We mean all Traffic lights
- Select Stores
- With Zebra Crossing
- ...
WTF!!! Just kill me already.

"Microsoft should not need to buy github, the platform itself should be ran by a non profit org like wikipedia or linux."

Add a herp a derp at the end. It will probably make it sound less stupid or hypocritical.

Seriously though, how many of you mecos actually pay for shit? Eh? How many of you donate to your fav Linux distros or web platforms?

Lets say that the entire devrant base did :) pretty sweet eh? There are still 28 million developers on fucking github.....now how many of those contribute to help account for server costs etc? How many actually use private paid repos etc?

And without adds and shit? This ain't Facebook!!

It makes sense. I am glad they did... and fuck you I would too.

I will see what happens before I put on my (disgusting) Richard Stallman Hat.

English is my second language. Today I learned Fedora is not just a Linux distro. It's also a name of a hat.
Guess the old logo made sense.

Ruby. Ruby this. Ruby that. Ruby in a box. Ruby with a hat. Ruby with a fox.

My job swears that there is no need for React, even though Rails now comes baked with webpack.

React with a jet pack. React with webpack. React in my web stack.

Kudos to the devrant team for epic response time!
<50min from bug report on Twitter to workaround on prod!

A must wear hat while programming!!

ಠ_ಠ

Just went to a bar in a nearby town and miraculously got a contact of a fairly big investor by talking to the barman there. Apparently said investor is also technically inclined, and has a fair amount of financial resources to help make my plan to make my own distribution and compete with Canonical, Red Hat and SUSE a thing.

Talk to barmen people! They're the people that have contacts - in pretty much every industry. They're the people that know people.

And one thing led to another:

HURRICANE INSPIRED PI PROJECT!

So in anticipation of hurricane Irma I built this little thing which measures barometric pressure using my raspberry pi's sense hat! It also adds the data to a graph. Very fun!

Honest graduation hat. :D

A non-dev friend just saw the "free santa hat with each duck ordered" announcement on my screen and he is extremely confused 😂

My mentor is a GOD. He's a workaholic. He knows everything. The only fucking thing he doesn't know is that his MENTEES ARE NOT HIS FUCKING SLAVES.

People always asked me how I got started with Python, I always have to come up with a reason to hide the fact that I started using it because I like the name

Slow, old, spaghetti coded legacy projects that no one has touched for years.

You know those ones where you put your Indiana Jones hat before going in and barely come out alive.

I was in college studying stuff I couldn't care less about and had a job that was consuming me. A couple of colleagues and I then decided to open our own company. Four years of sleepless nights later, all colleagues left. I had lost touch with family and friends, had lost a girlfriend and had been left with all the company's debt to pay. Going back to my old career seemed like the only option, but I couldn't let me sabotage myself again. I sat my butt in front of my sister's computer and downloaded every coding class I could get my hands on. Getting used to sleep deprivation helped. Eventually I built my first app and landed my first freelance job. All hat in hand, I told this company I didn't have much experience and they told me they'd hire a senior developer as well. It was on a Sunday morning, at 4am, with the deadline breathing down our necks, that the senior developer had jumped ship and the company asked me if I could take over the project. That moment I realised it's all about being competent. That moment I knew I could do this.

It happened 2 nights ago.
We had a whatsapp project for the distributed application programming class, my project mate and me were coding for 2 weeks whole day to finish it, especially with the end-to-end encryption feature that teacher asked, till 2 nights ago the project was trash, the private chat wasn't working and and nothing else is done we had only the UI, we was really doomed especially we had 1 more day to deliver the software, and we decided to deliver the project as a trash and get marks from the UI and the presentation.....
Till the night before deadline at 8 pm
I wanted to try fix some interface pictures and to make it better......
The next thing it was 6 am and the project is full working..
When I told my project mate he was not believing, I had to swear multiple times fot him and hat to go and show him the project by the eye.
We delivered the prohect and got 22/25 😁😁😁
It was incredible I didn't believe my self at first place.
Sory for the long story 😓.

Thank you Arch Linux community for saying that caring about security (i.e. expressing concerns about NSA's Speck being included as a module in Arch's distribution kernel) means that you're a tinfoil hat. Much trust, very wow! Nothing to hide, nothing to fear.. right?

Our "monitoring" today.

Learn you some Javascript

Every time I hear my boss say "surely it can't be that hard" or "that's what, like a 5 minute job?"
*shudder*

Seen on public transport today. (In a third world african country!)
Blue hat!

Let me tell you a story.

Our company has a homegrown monitoring solution. Keeps track of our deployments and alerts us when something is broken. Really nice for the most part, except a little issue where we get up to 25 alerts PER DAY that our PRODUCTION ENVIRONMENT IS DOWN. Including weekends.

With this many false positives, we quickly learn to ignore the alerts and miss real incidents.

So we approached this team, remember its our own tool, and told them about the problem. Turns out it is a known issue. And here's the kicker: they aren't planning on fixing it!

It gets better. Rather than fix this glaring issue, their solution is to make ANOTHER ALERT that lets us know the monitoring is misbehaving.

To recap, we can now expect to get up to 25 false positive alerts per day that our production is down, followed immediately by more alerts that the monitor is broken, which means we can ignore the previous alert.

As our PM said when he heard this: fuck that noise. We are escalating the shit out of this!

Who else is lonely this new years eve?

!rant I think I may have a way smaller head than the pattern I was using seemed to assume. 😅

(Or my stitches got messed up along the way. Either is possible.)

Who had also joined the Dark Side and feels like black hat?

We all make mistakes

What's your dream job?

Mine is working either at Digital Ocean as a server maintainer/service/programmer or at Red Hat developing gnome.

*spends a long time crafting a huge eBay post (we're moving)
* tries to drag and drop first picture
* page navigates to the picture without warning
* loses everything

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

WHEN DRAGGING A PICTURE INTO A WEB PAGE I NEVER WANT TO NAVIGATE TO A PAGE WITH JUST THAT IMAGE. WHY NO WARNING BEFORE LEAVING THE PAGE. WHY DON'T YOU SAVE TEXT LOCALLY. WHY DOES THE WEB SUCK SO HARD. AAAGGGHHHH.

* feels better
* starts over

At someone's wedding. Don't know anyone except my wife. She knows noone except for me and the bride.

Already spotted 3 programmers and I can give you my hat to shit into if that particular one of the three doesn't own a macbook. It's all over his face...

Netflix, why is your loading spinner so horrible!

Do you know what a percentage is??? 99% means you are ALMOST done. Just a tiny fraction to go. I should not see 99% for seconds or even minutes on end. Much less after the first 98% took only a couple seconds!!

Stop the lies!!!

I've developed an interesting habit. I wear a hat 24/7. The same exact hat.
I (almost) never wear my hat backwards. I think its weird, and I look weird, and its just too much weirdness.

There is one exception to this rule.

Before I begin coding each day, before a single stroke of my keyboard, I turn my hat backwards. I don't know why I started doing this, but it is almost as if my hat is a key and turning it unlocks all my programming knowledge.

Anyone else have a quirky habit they do before/during a coding session?

FINALLY got my Raspberry Pi Zero W after 2 months of waiting, comment me some cool projects to do with it

You're as slow as the python interpreter.

2 days into a new java project and I already miss scala so much.

When I was younger (about six) I wanted to hack into NASA and release all their files on aliens and UFO's to the world so they would know the truth 🌎👽

Well at least the tin foil hat nix fanboys aren't this fucking stupid lol

I spent more than an hour trying trying to debug why two functions were always returning undefined. I even put in conditional breakpoints and executed the statements to confirm the logic was correct.

I forgot return.

Found this hat at Goodwill.

I would become a tinfoil hat salesman

I feel like devRant is just a high-IQ society in disguise, anyone with me on this?

What are your favorite programming/scripting languages and why?

As a person who spends 99.99% of his time at home if not at school programming, reading, and watching netflix, what can I do to develop my social skills?

I just watched the gameplay for Cyberpunk 2077 and I'm super excited for it, CD Projekt Red did a fine job in everything in it, any cyberpunk fans on here?

When a co-worker creates a six page website that has over 60 separate CSS files?

!rant

I received my duck with the santa hat yesterday 😍
Proudly placed in my desk

My boyfriend and I just got home from a seminar and had a nice teachings and talks. As the speaker ended the talk, she asked each participants as to what is our ultimate goal.

G1: to be an able lawyer
B1: civil engineer!
B2: to pass the licensure examination
BF (God's Gift): businessman
Me (mind): Gray hat
Me (...): to have a start-up tech company

Since college, I really wanted to have a start-up company in due time. ^_^

Coding has given me the ability to turn my favorite hobby into a career. This in turn gave me the chance to take jobs in three countries so far (US, Germany, UK). So, I can explore the world with lovely wife while doing something I'm really passionate about and constantly learning. It also allows me to relate more to my dad, a software engineer of about 30 years who got me started when I was a kid.

In short, coding changed everything for me.

PS: I met my wife in intro to CS, though she's not a developer.

WTF just happened here? No. Really.. How did the guys manage to do this ? Anyone put on Sherlock Holmes hat and try to deduce what could have happened ?

Worst part about the people I know IRL knowing I’m a white hat Hacker - “Hey, so and so was taking shit I need you to hack their Facebook.”

*rolls eyes* I’m not your personal keyboard warrior nor do I give a shit who said what. Take care of it yourself. You’re an adult.

Got my new coding buddy!!!

User: "Why isn't this process updated? There's something wrong with your system."

Me: "Did you submit the request?"

User: "Uh yeah I'm sure I did..."

Me: "Go submit the request again." (they never did the first time)

User: "I don't know how. Will you show me?" *shows user how to do it* "Ok I did it now."

Me: "You did it wrong, you need to resubmit it."

User: "Ok I resubmitted it."

* a week later *

User: "The process still hasn't shown any progress."

Me: "You didn't resubmit it like you said you did."

User: "Will you show me how to do it again?"

* fuck me *

Me: "Sure..."

Process works as expected and everyone lives happily ever after, except the developer that knows it is just a matter of time till the next user blatantly lies, has no respect for anyone's time, and demonstrates a complete lack of desire to care about their job at all and just wants to bitch and complain like a typical lazy ass-hat.

When your company buys a third party solution and you spend all your time emailing them about bugs in their system.

Seriously, I even sent you the exact line of the bug in your JavaScript with a suggested solution, and deployed a new stack with your latest (broken) fix so you can test out that solution. Then you email back saying it is fixed but it is clearly still broken. If I email you a fixed version of your file will you deploy it? OMG!

When kids watch tutorials on youtube and think they wanna become black hat hackers and tell everyone that thay are black hat hackers 😂😂
Source : reddit

Working in security for many years only granted me world-class paranoia about taking pictures of myself and my family. It even made it hard to keep in touch with my friends as we don’t live in the same country anymore.

The good side is that it pays well enough to grant me a platinum foil hat.

!rant

So... innocent smoothies put knitted hats on their bottles in winter to support AgeUK.

That means my #swagduckie has the perfect winter hat 😄

Y’all in the uk, I can highly suggest this to keep yo duckie warm.

After being live multiple years supporting only Safari, Firefox, and Chrome, one customer wanted IE support. After taking a close look at the usage numbers, and discussing with us front-end devs, our product guy shot it down. Pop the champagne!

And how the fuck can I use my laptop?

I added some boards to this fucking Beowolf of a fucking Raspberry Pi!

Pi with 4GB RAM, 2TB SSD, 8 USB ports, 2 Ethernet ports, and a sense hat.

Gonna put this between my modem and router and see what fun I can get up to.

Would like to build a web portal that tracks my family's data usage with the tcpdump to graph approach, and probably a little weather widget to go with it using the sense hat.

If an orange costs $6 and a grape costs $4, how much does a pineapple cost?

The hat you wear matters a lot, you don't apply for a job as a Penetration tester with a black hat on.

What linux distro should I choose to be my primary OS?

P.S: I have used linux before

After the recent CIA leak...
BRB soldiering a tinfoil hat on my head 😨

Slow time so I can code more AND sleep more!

Vendor we('re forced to) work with, as we share a client. This is in their stylesheet. Fuck SEO best practices, amirite?! 😒

many from the outside world believe incognito is the purest form of anonymity and security.....because its logo has a suspicious man with a hat and an overcoat

2017 ends in just days. 2018 picks up where it left. What new skill would you like to add to your hat?

Oh my God. Did any of you catch Sundar from Google being grilled by Congress yesterday?

It is so embarrassing watching congressman who think they know technology ask questions did somebody who actually is technically proficient. you would think they would have hired somebody at least to educate them first before looking like an ass on TV.

It look like I asked my janitor to interview our next developer.

So funny though over his left shoulder there's a guy that looks like Sir topham hatt from Monopoly. Hahahahahahh not kidding black top hat and big white mustache.

Actually finishing a project.

I am a person who gets a lot of ideas for projects I want to work on, then I start writing the code for them, then I reach a wall, stop and restart the cycle all over again.

Fuck my life.

My introduction to programming and computers is quite different than most as in I didn't start programming first, I started by taking electronic parts from my toys and repurposing them or using them in different things, we had a computer I used to play games with but at age 7 my father died and my mother needed money so she sold it, the next laptop I got was at age 11 and then I started coding.

When you try to clap in a presentation while holding coffee and spill it all over yourself.

in Russian the word “шляпа” (fedora) means not only the specific hat but also something that makes no sense, something ridiculous or something of low quality.

So when someone sends you some spaghetti code on a review, you can just say “That’s fedora” and I love it. You can also WEAR a fedora and point to it as a response to someone saying something that makes no sense.

When a pm releases an email to hundreds of customers telling them how to get a free month on their account through a process that doesn't exist.

*puts on cowboy hat.
*cracks knuckles
*prays to every god.

When our company (past employer) got acquired by another company and everyone got to have a meeting where you got a black or blue envelope. One indicated you were being let go, the other indicated you were being offered an "opportunity" if you would relocate to NJ. What was an awesome company -- they destroyed the soul of it in one day.

Oh well their CEO got let go after a US Congressional investigation earlier this year. Karma, bitch!

When you make a mistake and try to fix it, but you can't remember how to spell amend...

git commit --ammend
error: unknown command `amend'

git commit -ammend
[branch-name] mend

Huh?

git log
commit #
mend

Created a new commit with message 'mend'. Now to clean this all up and go get some sleep!

Finally installed Linux(Mint) on my laptop.

I guess I'll need to install some essential things that I need to really make use of it. I'm just exploring right now and so far, I'm loving it.

Got really tired of the BSOD that Windows kept giving me.
I've tried a few solutions, but it seems like it has made its comfortable nest inside and shows its sad face whenever it feels like it and ruins my important work (not really, but it really pisses me off)
Can't get rid of Windows completely because I need it for various reasons.

I've used Linux(Red Hat) before and also my university computers have Red Hat installed.
I would've also installed it on my PC, but it doesn't work right now.

Thanks,guys!
(For making me want to use Linux)
I really have a lot to learn.

PS - I can barely see what I'm typing here. Is it just me or is it really just bright as shit? (On web, of course)

My new helper arrived. Note! Check your packing material for the santa hat! I almost threw mine away thinking it was forgotten.

Thanks guys!

Who else clicks on the profile of everyone who upvotes their posts?

"Can you check what my password is?"

Ive reached a point where seeing the telegram logo with the little santa hat makes me so happy that i smile for hours because everything else sucks so much. Can we just burn formal education to the ground and only hire <30yro people as professors?

!rant

Super awesome day today.

1. Got up early to do a risky production deploy and it worked!
2. Three PRs approved before lunch.
3. Got some time to continue learning scala.
4. Coffee and cupcakes with some refugees and discussed work as a software engineer.
5. Tried virtual reality for the first time. Really fun.
6. Helped prepare our goals for this quarter and present them to the department.
7. Department meeting had free local craft beer and pretzels.
8. Went bouldering after work and flashed a 6c.
9. Curled up with my wife watching Netflix.

I really love my life sometimes.

!rant

I just saw someone write about how much he hates school and it reminded me of all I am about to say:

I go to a fancy private school in my country full of shitheads and idiots that think that they can rely on their parents money for the rest of their lives, are always concerned about the latest trends (yeezys, dabs, fidget spinners... etc) and it just gets on my nerves as I have to live with all that and have almost no friends since I failed my class two years ago, when I sit in school I can't focus on anything the teacher says which in turn contributes to my shit grades and there is nothing I can do about it. I have been diagnosed with persistent depresseive disorderand bouts of major depression and my mom won't accept to give me adequate medication because she says(although this is not always the case) that antidepressants can trigger the bipolar disorder that runs in my family, and on top of all this shit, ever since I was 7 I have been raised by my single mother after my father died (I never tell people that my father is dead usually because I hate the look of pity I get coming out of their faces) and my mother has been screwed over for all her life because she can't make a good decision or call bullshit even if you put a gun to her head.

And what I hate most about all that is that I have no one to talk to because my mom is one of those religious freaks so I can't talk to her about my real deep thoughts, and every psychologist or counselor I have been to has been shit.

And this is just another chronicle of my miserable fucking existence.

Me walking into Best Buy picking up a package wearing my Android hat.

Me: I'm here to pick up a package
Best Buy guy: That is a nice hat!
Me: Oh? Thanks! It my favorite
Guy: As long as it isn't Apple

Does anybody know a course on machine learning with python that doesn't need that much mathematical knowledge? Because in every course I find I need to know advanced mathematics yet I am still in grade 10 and haven't studied it yet.

PSA: negate your tests and make sure they fail!

I have what I thought was a weird and slightly paranoid habit. When I write tests sometimes just as a sanity check negate the assertion to make sure the test fails and isn't a false positive. Almost always fails as expected.

But not today! Turns out I had forgotten to wrap my equality check in an assertion so it would always pass. It freaks me out to imagine pushing a test that always passes not just because it doesn't do its job, but could also obscure a bug and trick me into thinking it works differently than it does. Broken tests are the worst!

But it pays to be paranoid.

This year I want to start a project that I'll be proud of, learn PHP, Java, PostgreSQL and Assembly.

Someone today told me that I represent the chillest vibe that Texas can muster and I really did appreciate that.

Would I've had my hat on, I would've tipped it and said thank you. But I was not playing cowboy that day.

I just don't want people from the outside and from within the states to think that we are all a bunch of racist republitard rednecks, I don't mind being called a redneck, but shit man I ain't one to hate on people based on their preferences/etc/etc/etc

You can be a rough cowboy and still be nice to mfkas, shit ain't hard at all, matter of fact I think it is easier to be nice than to be a total dickhead. I will drop a motherfucker down in 2 secs if need to tho.

I just want mfkas to be happy around me.

Years ago, one of my friends in college was taking an intro to CS class. He asked me for help on one of his assignments. It was a simple Python program, but it wasn't running as expected. I go in figuring it will be easy to fix. But everything looks exactly right. An hour later I'm tearing my hair out! It isn't even entering the function although it's clearly called. I'm beginning to feel very self conscious, as a CS major who can't even debug a 15 line program for a friend.

Then it hit me. This is Python. I used an editor macro to convert all indentation to tabs, lined them up, and it ran on the first try. Turns out, he had somehow ended up with a mixture of tabs and spaces.

I'm not sure what the takeaway is, but I think he got a surprisingly honest introduction to the life of a developer...

!rant
If i order a devDuck now, will it still come with a Christmas hat?

I don't write comments on my code

Decided to install new CentOS to prepare for Red Hat exams.
a) had to disable VirtualBox Audio and USB otherwise it got stuck during boot (lvm2 masking did not help)
b) First command - "dnf update". Crashed in middle of the process and completely screwed dnf/yum (TWICE!). Went through just fine when executed from runlevel 3.

So far it held up to the name Enterprise Linux because this is the exact out of box clusterfuck I would expect from a corporate.

Me: *adds a shiny new graph to our foos web app showing player ratings*

Fred: Can I please have a button to see just my scores?

Me: *adds "JUST FRED" button*

Fred: perfect, thanks

A few minutes ago i called a local snack bar because i've found a IoT IP Webcam which has access for everyone. I told the boss the situation and now
I got a free fries. #whiteHat

Heathrow express having some trouble this morning.

Tinfoil hat time!

So, for this scenario we assume a world war has is in full swing, and all communications are either completely out or extremely monitored.

Additionally, no servers can be trusted and no ISPs can be trusted. Even when downloading software you cannot know if the software you got is tampered or not.

You have to send a message to a recipient you cannot physically contact, and you have to make sure him and only him get the message, otherwise nukes are deployed and we all die. The message has to arrive within 3 months or else it's too late.

Is it possible? If yes, how?

TLDR; Default admin login on WEP encrypted WLAN router for getting free stuff at my hair stylist studio.

Free WLAN in my hair stylist studio: They had their WEP key laying around in the waiting area. Well, I am not very happy with WEP, thought that they never heard of security. Found the default GW address, typed it into my browser and pressed Enter, logged in with admin/1234 and voila, I was root on their ADSL router 😌 Even more annoyed now from such stupidity I decided to tell the manager. All I told him was: You use a default login on your router, you give the WiFi password for free, WEP is very very insecure and can be hacked in seconds, and do you know what criminals will do with your internet access? He really was shocked about that last question, blank horror, got very pale in just one sec. I felt a little bit sorry for my harsh statement, but I think he got the point 😉 Next problem was: he had no clue how to do a proper configuration (he even didn't knew the used ISP username or such things). Telled me that 'his brother' has installed it, and that he will call him as soon as possible. Told him about everything he should reconfigure now, and saw him writing down the stuff on a little post-it.

Well, he then asked me what he can pay me? Told him that I don't want anything, because I would be happy when he changes the security settings and that is pay enough. He still insisted for giving me something, so I agreed on one of a very good and expensive hairwax. Didn't used it once 😁

Some weeks later when I was coming back for another hair cut: Free WLAN, logged in with admin/1234, got access and repeated all I did the last time once more 😎

HOW CAN YOU NOT LEARN FROM FAILS??

I've been struggling with some financial issues lately. I haven't told this to my family bc I am helping my mom with money, hat wouldn't help.

Sadly, I got two general tickets for WebSummit 2019 and I thought "okay, I am nearby Portugal rn, somebody of my circle could go with me and have some fun, I feel so blue..."

No one. Not a single one. Nobody.

"Maybe with those Telegram groups of JS developers..."

No one.

Maybe it sounds like some fraud or something, so they didn't answer. I even mentioned to an old entrepreneur friend of mine, and he didn't even answer me.

Disheartened is the word for today. I don't know, I am not expecting that people can join this adventure just bc is awesome, we all have bills to pay, but at least an answer would be fine.

I know it is not a fun story, and there are people in worse situations than mine. I just wanted to do some catharsis bc I lost my laptop.

I still have bills, two tickets, and a new kind of miserable mood.

Thank you for reading.

I have mixed feelings about Qbit research. On one hand, I want it to be open source as much as possible. But the the same time, we give "them" faster access to faster and easier manipulation and exploitation of many things than ever.

(edit: grammar, I'm drunk)

What's it called when someone's a hacker but they do it because they're bored, not for good OR evil? Clear hat?

Boss needs certain stats pulled from database once a year for board meeting. This time I delegate it to a junior dba/sysadmin. He looks at my 3-year-old docs that I hastily jotted down and pasted and included my rambling notes with results from way back then. Mostly they were just to jog my own memory, not to be a really neat, clean instruction guide. He does the queries correctly, but in ticket for boss he pastes also all my notes from the docs. boss gets confused, "what is this other number, I don't get it?!" We have to have a meeting of the 3 of us and waste an hour or so just to figure out what went wrong, finally I realize what junior guy accidentally did. Moral of story: to avoid baffling the nontechs, always simplify, simplify, simplify. Alternate moral of story: before delegating a task that seems old hat to you, always review your notes/docs and make sure they're ready for someone else to use them.

One of the colleagues I am close with is changing teams. They will still be around the company, in fact the office of the team they are going to is right by mine. It just sucks to lose a good developer and friend from the team.

I am more honest than console.log

Interesting.

I wrote how I fall asleep even though I took an energy drink last night on different social media app.

Now devRant is showing me these. 👀

When you offer to help out a fellow coworker on the top priority feature he is developing and he just sends you the branch and stops working on it.

I get home today and my wife says:

"Just finished some chores and really want to play stardew valley, but the computer has been updating for an hour!"

Windows 10 anniversary update strikes again.

Disney Fast Play is a fucking lie.

Every god damn time racing to find the remote before “Fast Play” kicks in with like 17 minutes of fucking unskippable previews.

Fuckin’ Mickey Mouse hat mother fuckers.

Anyone paying attention to Ripple?

One will seldom hear me completely shit about a piece of technology.

But my time has come to do it again:

Fuck RedHat man. Like, really, fuck you. Fedora is fine. Centos is fine. Fuck red hat.

That is all. Thank you.

DevRant colors :

White - Gray - Black

White hat hacker , gray hat hacker and black hat hackers

Just something random ..

Fuck the feelings of powerlessness and helplessness. when a friend comes crying for you for help with their hacked account and you keep asking them about what they did to protect it in the first place and they reply with nothing, no recovery email, no recover phone, no secondary verification, NOTHING. and you can do nothing but stand there and watch them cry while you can literally do nothing because there literally nothing you can do to retrieve their stolen accounts. FUCK BLACK HAT HACKERS.

My favorite item on my desk is my "Tiny" Dota2 demihero vinyl. He can hold all kinds of stuff like my pens, glasses, earbuds, and whatevs. Here he is holding my SlothBacca hat!

When you immediately regret your career decisions.

My status:
Graduate student studying Computer Science at the University of New York at Buffalo.
4 Computer Vision and Image Processing Projects
3 Distributed Systems projects (Android apps).
Red Hat Certifications.
Applied to 135 companies for an internship program.
Here are the replies I have gotten so far.
" We have analyzed your resume and we think you'll be a great choice for this position at our company."
What position?
MARKETING INTERN.
FML!

"LOL what ass-hat saw camelCase and then decided to not use it --- oh fuck I'm the one..."

I found a vulnerability in an online compiler.

So, I heard that people have been exploiting online compilers, and decided to try and do it (but for white-hat reasons) so I used the system() function, which made it a lot harder so i decided to execute bash with execl(). I tried doing that but I kept getting denied. That is until I realized that I could try using malloc(256) and fork() in an infinite loop while running multiple tabs of it. It worked. The compiler kept on crashing. After a while I decided that I should probably report the vulnerabilites.

There was no one to report them to. I looked through the whole website but couldn't find any info about the people who made it. I searched on github. No results. Well fuck.

I first wanted to be a black hat hacker so I opened cmd.exe and run help to see which commands I could use to make batch programs and then I taught myself the rest of batch. Afterwards, I drifted to DHTML (HTML+CSS+JS) where I made some basic snippets while teaching myself JS

We've been using private GitHub repos as a distribution method for our personal npm packages at work for years.

I finally got sick of it and did the work to publish them to artifactory yesterday. Today, I worked out the remaining kinks, fixed the CI builds, and wrote a wiki page explaining the change with step by step migration instructions and sent it around to the rest of the devs. And it's working great!

I feel simultaneously like a hero for finally getting this fixed and an idiot for putting up with it for so long.

Also thankful for my devops friend who helped a bunch.

What did the scarf say to the hat? You go on ahead, I am going to hang around a bit longer.

How can I contribute on github, I always say that I will yet I never do?Any tips?

Just another privacy rant.

I'm sick of people using the excuse "I don't care if Google keeps all my data it's just for adds"

That's true now but if you look at the current trends governments are making to forcing ISP's to store metadata, then it will be the actual data. Eventually they push that to other companises as well.

Now look at Australia for example the police don't need to notify you, let alone get a warrant, to access your metadata. There's also a law in NSW were you can be charged for accociating with a peraon commuting a crime.... Now your in jail for downloading movies years ago that you forgot about but your ISP didn't. I now that's a rather extreme punishment but, Imagine if the government needed some cash so they fine every person that ever downloaded a movie and everyone accociated with person.

Just a crazy theory with poor examplees but just because your data isn't hurting now doesn't mean it won't.

I'm gonna sit in a corner with my tin foil hat now.

When your coworker is having issues with an old ColdFusion app, and says "Nevermind, I am just going to rewrite this in ASP". Yes, he is writing a "new" app in Classic ASP. 😒

Hey @dfox, @trogus, the birds on the shoulder are super pimp, but would you be interested in making a parrot? You know, to go along with a Hawaiian shirt, an eye patch, and a pirate hat?

That'd be metal af \m/\m/

Intentionally write code that might be buggy just to finish earlier and start something else.

The crown jewel of my collection. Snow-white Mr. Kinder, wearing a pointy hat, holding balloons that say “KKK”. You can’t make this shit up.

Just moved countries and started a new job at an awesome company, which is so great I have nothing yet to rant about.

Oh here goes: almost three weeks with no internet at home and no end in sight.

git pull origin master --allow-unrelated-histories

Because I like to keep life interesting.

Yesterday, I started taking the new programming classes in my school. I am utterly disappointed, before even teaching my classmates who are new to programming some basic python or javascript, the teacher started the class with teaching arduino and C and because of that many of my friends have since dropped the class and we are only 3 left out of an original 20.

Although some of you might say that arduino is a good introduction to programming, I believe you should teach a kid basic python or java before getting into arduino or raspi..etc

!rant

A while ago I ranted about how the programming club in my school decided to start teaching programming with arduino and it was causing the students to drop out because they were finding it hard, well today I went to the club and got there 10 minutes late, yet when I arrived, thinking that they would have started without me, there was only 2 people other than the instructor and assisstant. And the funny thing is that although 90% of the class stopped going to the programming club because they were finding arduino hard, the instructor still doesn't want to teach anything else and is adamant on teaching them arduino.

What a fucktard

Tin foil hat on.

Does devRant know that I'm sick with a fever?

Always amazes me how as soon as someone is given the "tech lead" hat, they tend to argue for an alternative implementation for the sake of having last say instead of listening to those with more domain knowledge.

🤷‍♂️

Things you should not say on your last day of work:

If I broke it, I think it would be pretty obvious.

The earliest high-profile “native ad” I know of happened in 1831, when Alexander Pushkin released “Evgeny Onegin”. This is a very big deal. Russian Empire had huge cultural influence back then, and it was fashionable. Everything coming from it was cool. Sobranie London still has Russian Empire coat of arms as their logo. Also, Pushkin is regarded by many to be the best Russian poet ever, with Evgeny Onegin being his flagship masterpiece.

So, Breguet, the watch company, decided to advertise in this very piece. It went like this (sorry for the lack of rhyme and the overall lameness in my translation, it is hardly possible to translate Russian poetry to English):

Wearing a wide bolivar hat,
Onegin is going to the avenue
He's chilling there until
Breguet that never sleeps
Chimes him that it is time
To go and get something to eat

To put it into a context, it's as if someone bought an ad in Romeo and Juliet.

I had many good teachers and mentors in the years but one was far most the best. He was a CS Math teacher and hat this flame 🔥 for math and teaching. It was literally affecting everyone in class. He took his time to get everyone on the same level. While some would do better then others all would succeed. What made him special were many little tricks. He would let us all sit together after every topic and test and discuss what each found easy or hard. Everyone would get his time and he would never tolerate offending behavior. After a year we were all grown together helping each other get through the exams. It was kind of magical.

I told him this and he was in fact really happy to hear that. When we meet nowadays we get some drinks and talk about hobbies and stuff.

I know it’s old hat but…Edge…I mean really how is it still so bad? How do you base your browser of the chromium engine, have, gosh idk, a billion dollar dev budget, and still, still, it’s significantly worse than chrome in every ui/ux way.

Uh... how many?

Partner wants to hire a freelance consultant for iOS development, (because I cant make anything out of their retarded ecosystem), on my advise.

After a year im still getting paid 0$/h, and we have to hire someone...

Is this the point where i wear a dunce hat?

My key ring :)

An old friend (remember the guy who had a miniature Red hat?), gave me an old RAM from a work machine (he worked in data center team).

We had many spare ones so, I picked one and been using it since then.

Photo in comments because dR is fucking up the resolution.

I can't seem to find the devRant hat on the store, are they sold out or did they stop making them?! >:o

I was trying to learn HTML CSS so that I could become a fullstack developper yet felt so bored doing so I didn't like them at all, did anyone else go through this why learning them also? Think I'll stick to django.

Reading "duh... that link looks sketchy" time after time when attempting to nudge people in the direction of good resources, e.g., on-line manual pages, becomes rather irritating. Is typing the URL into VirusTotal or something really such a fucking hassle? Are you sufficiently special to warrant the creation of an IP grabber which is dedicated to targeting you... AFTER you posted your exact location on Instagram last week?

Similarly, some pants-shitting, worm-eating troglodytes who have the gall to claim to know anything about cybersecurity STILL think that for all Web sites k, that k's URL begins with "https" implies that k is secure. NO! Unencrypted Web sites are FINE unless sensitive information is being transferred. Are publicly available manual pages sensitive information now?

Grabbing the campaign hat and writing death threats and very personal insults is sometimes slightly tempting.

I don't rant about shit often, I need to get this out of my head.
So I purchased two Linksys routers about 2 years ago, and in the span of this month both of them effectively died after power loss...
They still kinda work, but both stopped detecting internet so because it's kinda their job to do that.. they are useless at this point
The models are WRT 1900ACS and MAX-STREAM AC1750
---
Now for the tin foil hat stuff - they both had 2 year warranties, that expired a few months ago, maybe planned obsolescence?

This is a place for ranting, right? It's "Dev"-"Rant", right?
So, why so much hate when people do actually rant?
Kinda defeats the purpose, doesn't it? Or maybe the name is just misleading...
Or maybe y'all just gate-keeping ranting - which is... ya, okay - you do you, you preppy tosser.

Anyway, on that note:
I fucking hate web-development.
I fucking hate CSS.

CSS isn't a tool, it's a curse.
It's like a soft black magic system:
This specific behavior can sometimes be created by combining these specific elements, but will fall apart if you're a gemini - unless you wore a colorful hat at your fifth birthday party. If you didn't have a party, it'll produce some random behavior of the deer-god's choosing.

I want to take my hat off and a moment of silence for HTC. The once great and mighty has fallen.

Just walked by a guy wearing a Windows 10 hat. 😒

I was always interested in computers. My dad was a big computer geek and a programmer to boot. Usually had a couple old PCs in the basement to play with.

In middle school, I took tech ed and we made simple web sites with html and css. I remember the struggle of nested tables.

In high school, I couldn't fit any CS into my schedule. But someone gave me a learning to code book in ruby. I loved it, and have been hooked ever since.

//Met an old friend
So I heard you're a programmer now. I need some help from you.

*write something on paper

HACK this fb account unless you are a big fat phony.

Best tip for getting unstuck? If it's after your usual leaving time, GO HOME.

So many times I solved the problem right away the next morning. Only wish I followed my own advice more often...

Computer does a BSOD right at the end of a tiebreaker competitive overwatch match where the enemy is about to cap the point and win. I'm one of the tanks. Hard reboot and back in the game within 45s. Just barely hold them off in overtime and win the match. Epic!

Thank God for SSDs!

Current Mac and Windows user here looking to get back into Linux. Any distro suggestions?

Looking for something not too high maintenance.

When everyone thinks FE is easier, quicker, and less important than BE. Just because our fantastic UX people made you a high fidelity mockup in a day does not mean we can build the whole FE in a week.

This is why I'm returning to full stack.

It drives me crazy when there are unclosed parens or quotes anywhere.

Is it too much to ask for people to run their Facebook posts through a compiler first?

How about for once in your fucking life, before saying that my code is wrong because it is giving you errors, you fucking check to see if you have the semicolons in place

I have 3 mid terms tomorrow and haven't even started and can't concentrate, I'm fucked.

What books or courses would you recommend to further my knowledge in C/C++?