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GUYS!!! SHE SAID "YES" !!!!
I'M SOOOO HAPPYYYYY!!!
All my dreams are becoming real! I was so nervous to ask, but it was worth it! I waited for the right moment, looked her in her eyes, she looked at mine.. And there I asked it: "are you willing to give it a try and install libreoffice instead of ms office?"
AND SHE SAID: "yes"!!!
Do I have the best wife or what!21 -
Why do I create free services (at least free for now)?
Because one of my biggest dreams is to create a service which will be used by many many people.
A man can dream, right?
😞32 -
My boss typed up a GitLab ticket that looked like it took at least an hour to make. Screenshots, diagrams, how to reproduce the bug, dreams, hopes, desires, dinner recipes, marriage advice, how to diversify a portfolio. Honestly, the whole 9 yards.
The bug fix was changing a SQL Inner Join to a Left Join. 10 seconds.14 -
A couple of years ago, I was working in a computer shop as a "technician", I was 15, first job I ever had.
One day an elderly lady came into the shop, probably 50'ish, she and her whole family "suffered" from electromagnetic radiation, and the mother had the worst suffering. She complained about her TV box that just had died.
I accept the tuner and see it's wrapped with 10 layers of aluminium foil, with a tiny hole for the IR receiver.
The whole box smells like burnt electronics, and the foil gets darker for each layer I unwrap. I try explain to her that the box gets warm and overheated by wrapping it like this, and she's lucky that it didn't catch fire.
I further explain to her that she will not get a new box, because the warranty does not cover _this_. The mother tells me she has to wrap it like this, because she gets headaches when she's watching the news.
She then proceeds to go into a rage mode and gets her whole family into the shop, where all of them starts yelling at me, the younger kids start throwing stuff down from the shelves and touching the TVs with sticky fingers (literally, sticky, like yuck!).
Unsure what to do, boss is in a meeting, and my colleague is busy in the back.
So I calmly tell them that in this building there's 4 wireless networks, 3 wireless phones, high voltage cables run in the wall behind me, there's factory tracks 20 meters behind the building, next door business is an electrician, you're standing in front of wall with 30-40 TVs, 5 HDMI splitters, 3 TV boxes and a Blu-ray player. And they've all been standing in front of them for the last 10 minutes.
They all suddenly feel really sick and run out of the store, never to be seen again. From that day, I decided I'll never work in a shop again, and pursued my dreams to become a developer.
TL;DR: Family is "sensitive" to electromagnetic radiation, almost put burnt down their house because of stupidity, yelled at me. I decided to pursue my dream as a developer.16 -
Today I met a girl who’s super cute, down to earth, smart, uses no social media, and games. I would normally wake up soon after such dreams, but this actually happened today. I asked her out before it was too late 😊18
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Ladies and Gentlemen I've upgraded from being lonely to In a relationship
'Cause I finally found the girl of my dreams. 💑
HaHa April Fool's Day 😂😂
Ouch!5 -
Met a guy who uses linux as his main os, told me stuff about setting up i3, powerline, git.
Then I woke up, good dreams
Edit; I don’t really have any friends close to me to talk about these stuff (some lives in different provinces)15 -
When you want to be a godly programmer but all you do on your free time is watch movies and porn. :(13
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Anyone else have weird useless dreams?
Last night I dreamed that if my cat couldn't open my door, it was because her depencies weren't correctly installed.8 -
Father: Son, you're capable of doing anything you want, you can conquer the world if you believe in your dreams.
10 years later...
Father: WTF, Python programmer? Really son?5 -
I’m a student who makes open source projects that are fairly popular and are used by several companies.
Today, I’m launching my Patreon campaign to hopefully fulfill my dreams of working on open source full-time.
Today is a good day.
https://patreon.com/kbrsh28 -
So I have officially achieved one of my childhood dreams and built my own PC, took me a while to save up enough to to afford it and yes it's not the best but it's mine and I love it :)
12 -
Today my mom gave me a 2 meter by 1,20 meter whiteboard. She says that that might help me to achieve my dreams with what i am doing on my computer. This is amazing.5
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Items checked since entering devRant the last time:
- finished my PhD
- escaped a toxic relationship
- moved to the US for work
- turned 30
The end of my decade was pretty good.5 -
Working from home, picking my own hours of work, being paid ridiculous sums of money, and of course, all the pretty ladies. Oh wait. I have none of that. :(4
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Damn, last night I went to bed with an unsolved bug. That was the worst night in a long time. Nightmares of not being able to solve it, then surprisingly solving it with an unbelievable solution... Waking up and solving it in reality instantly. Geez...4
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Being different is not a crime, and people who tell you it is are jealous that you've picked up a skill they never in their wildest dreams could acquire.
You can code. They cannot. That is pretty damn cool.
-learn python the hard way3 -
I just woke up in the middle of the night realizing that I have been dreaming of a for-loop the last few hours!3
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I noticed some users with very high votes and looked at their posts. All of the posts were just positive statements. Let me try. "I think computers are wonderful. It's so exciting to build out the ideas of my dreams and help others."
11 -
!rant
I just wanted to say how much I freaking love this place. I come here every day, and what I find is a magical community of people who are accepting of everyone, supportive of each others hopes and dreams and sympathize with those struggling with jobs or school or just life in general. DevRant honestly makes the world a better place, at least for me. Thank you @dfox and @trogus for this beautiful Eden!3 -
There is nothing sexier than a well designed CI pipeline....i have wet dreams about that green check mark.3
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Mr Robot >>> Queen?
https://imdb.com/title/tt1727824/
Repost (deleted the old post to add this marvelous picture for tha girls wet dreams.)
17 -
How weird is this?
I was working on a project. I wasn't able to find solution for a particular sub problem. It was late so I thought of sleeping.
I dreamt about the problem. I solved it in my dream. When I woke up in the morning, I remembered the solution and I solved it.4 -
After a few years of dreaming about becoming an Android Developer, I am almost ready to release my fully native Android app in Google Play. Wish me luck 😊7
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Working for a company that does PC repair I see allot of computers. But this one model of Dell seems like it will never stop haunting my dreams. Windows XP and all
12 -
About to be jobless in less than a month because I'm resigning to take a bet on my dreams and skills. Deep down I'm little bit scared as each day goes by.
Looking forward to it.6 -
The satisfaction when your private project works as I thought from the beginning.
I will have nice dreams this night3 -
I guess I'm not the only one who sometimes code in my dreams while sleeping. Maybe it's because working as a programmer is like a dream come true.4
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!rant
I just dreamed about a 6-year old kid looking for me to ask me what is a pipeline. A CPU pipeline.
I felt so happy to explain (I was that into computers when I was 11 or so) that I couldn't start, I woke up first.
Time to have a son/daughter?3 -
So I just got offered an internship at my dream company in London. The programme sounds super nice, it looks like I'll learn a ton of stuff, and it's super well paid.
BUT MY FUCKING USELESS UNIVERSITY WON'T LET ME GO BECAUSE THEY WANT AT LEAST 4 MONTHS LONG INTERNSHIPS AND THIS ONE IS SUMMER ONLY. I just hate that fucking school, it's the opportunity of my dreams but they won't let me go because of some stupid rule..15 -
I bless everyone with happiness worth billions of dollars and additional billion dollar in cash.
Live happy everyone. I hope all your good dreams come true.20 -
The British summer results in restless nights and broken sleep filled with nightmares.
One particular dream last night involved my friends messing around with a ouija board and they begin asking in questions. I remain sceptical and tell them to ask it to reveal the solution to the issues I'm having retrofitting a legacy web app with a new design.
The board disconnected itself. Hell had no answer. -
So there was that paranoid schizophrenic person, a blonde girl with a buzz cut, and somehow she was a friend of mine. She used a Linux distro called “!!!!!!!!____!!!!!”, and convinced me it was the best distro out there. But the way she used it was… very specific.
She called me. She told me the new distro was out, this time it was called “!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”, and _this_ was the best one. It finally allowed her to observe the area around her neighbourhood right from her PC, through some app, and make pits in the ground. It was done with a touchscreen of a Nintendo DSi connected to her PC with something that looked like an IDE cable. You touch the area of the screen, and the pit will appear outside IRL. This was needed to trap swine-looking creatures in those pits, as they infested the land and were attacking people in packs, turning them into dirty, greyish, half-transparent lumps of gel.
I went to see her, and somehow I knew exactly how it's going to end, as if I decided to replay a game level. She lived in a rotten, mouldy, dark, half-abandoned condo building. She was also a terrible hoarder. I approach the old wooden door of her flat. It was painted over 1000 times and was barely closing. She knew I would come. She rushed outside, looked at me with her moon-sized eyes, grabbed my arm and told me:
“We have to run.”
I felt a sudden crippling rush of anxiety. I woke up. My heart was absolutely racing. My sight became darker and darker. The chest pain was consuming me, and I could barely move. I almost vomited.
That was quite a night.8 -
Biggest dev career dream? 🤔
World domination. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Hey you asked for dreams and never said anything about them being realistic! 🤪9 -
You know what?
Last night I was dreaming and all that I’ve seen was fucking preloader.
Seriously. I couldn’t wake up. I tried thinking about something else but couldn’t focus on anything else than fucking preloader spinning around. Just couldn’t get it out of my head.
That was terrible. Am I even human? Or was my dreams server blocked? Damn, I’m gonna sleep with VPN tonight.1 -
I'm a VR developer, I'm working on a zombie survival, I want to finish that, then start an vrmmorpg 😍😍😍9
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!rant
Just wanted to share this beautiful development miracle. Hello Games has proved to us that it's never the end, and you can always come back to fix your mistakes as long as you don't give up on yourself. Follow your dreams motherfuckers :D
6 -
Can we talk about something? I can't be the only one...
Code dreams.
What are they? You either sleep poorly, lightly, or not at all and continually repeat nonsensical code that you would otherwise KNOW is wrong when awake, (and it may even be a problem you already solved!) but for some reason your brain just wants you to mull over it over and over again.
I've been free of them for quite some time, but it happened now the past two nights. Drives me fucking nuts.14 -
Announcing devRant 2.0! It is time for exciting overhaul, sponsored by our good friends at Tencent, that will bring life back to this amazing platform.
- elegant simplicity of Viber meets excellent minimalism of AWS
- custom avatars for ++ members
- exciting mini-games
- animated stickers
- ChatGPT integration for ++ members
What a time to be alive!9 -
!rant
>dreams something good
>enjoying it
>feeling it
>mom wakes me up
>dream stops
>yells at mom
>gets shouted back
>thinks of dream again
>was soo good
>see tag5 -
As a kid (in the 90s) I used to get a reoccurring nightmare that my family computer would get a blue screen of death and start screaming at me.
Legit hated computers as a kid because of that.2 -
I haven't built a new computer in 9 years, but I finally, finally got together enough money to go big.
POWER: Seasonic Focus Plus 850W 80+ Gold
MOTHERBOARD: NZXT N7 Z370 ATX LGA1151 (Black)
GPU: EVGA GTX 1080 FTW GAMING
CPU: INTEL Core i7-8700K 3.7GHz 6-Core
RAM: G.SKILL TridentZ 3000 Mhz 32GB (2 x 16 GB)
SSD: SAMSUNG 860 EVO 1TB
CPU COOLING: NZXT Kraken X62
I can't fucking wait for it to arrive.5 -
in some parts of the world it is 28 already and it is my birthday. so age++
not mentioning it because of stress ball but because I need lot of best wishes as the road ahead is very difficult and dreams are very big.
thanks everyone here to make me feel home2 -
Just had my first insomnia night, I simply could not fall asleep! While laying in my bed I had great ideas for work and for my home projects, like new features, infrastructure and even implementation details. Now that I'm up I can't remember most of it, of course!
Worst part about it is that when I got to bed I had about 5hrs to get some quality sleep, now I got non it feels like. Fuck.
Can anyone relate? :/7 -
So... I was in bed going to sleep 5 minutes ago... I just had a thought I have no idea from where...
My dreams are controlled by code source files...
Change source files, I will have different dream....
Guess I spent a good amount of time with source files today 😅😅8 -
Do u know facts☺
Bill gates kept same password for all his accounts from 1993 to 1998
His password was
Iwillwinthisworldin@decade1 -
!dev
Lots of dudes keep posting his "check in at the gym" statuses on fb.
Shit like that irritates me. I go to the gym at least once a day, have been going since my military days. I have no need to take pictures and or let my fb people know about that shit. I have way more important shit to do.
My biggest thing is, how the fuck do you equate going to the gym with success?
A picture of you working out with the tags "chasing my dreams", "towards my goal in life", "getting the future i want" <----how? Are you gonna live of getting slim and fit? I mean, you can, but then why are you still living with your parents being unemployed?
How? You can't say that you are chasing your dreams there when the only reason you get to go 5 times a day there is because you are unemployed......
Just saying12 -
What I Like about Home Office?
My squeaky clean toilet. No colleagues who Block the toilet, no colleagues who seem to forget their bathroom cleanliness at home -
Last night I dreamed that I figured out a new complicated computer language... it was the best feeling until I woke up and realized it didn’t exist and all that work was for nothing!! Why can’t dreams be more productive?!4
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"No don't become a developer. All that business in going to be offshored . Try becoming something else instead!"
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Last night I had a very strange dream. I should point out in advance, all of this is fictional and none of it really happened.
I was looking at an answer I posted on Stack Exchange.. for the sake of argument, let's say it was Super User. I remember the question being about volume limiting, which is actually an issue I and many other iOS 14.2/14.3 users have been facing in the last few months. Apparently it has been partially addressed in 14.4.
In the real world I fixed the issue by jailbreaking the phone and unloading the healthd service, while in the dream that was the answer I had documented on Super User. In reality I have documented it in several other places, but not there.
Fast-forward a couple of days in the dream where the answer was posted, and I was now looking at a reply. I don't remember the exact details of it, but apparently in the answer I had posted something about my network.. a screenshot from the iPhone? And the comment on it basically said something along the lines of "your answer is shit, and you probably have a very basic internet connection with default settings". I was really upset by that, as my network is actually quite advanced (on account of being a sysadmin).
Then I woke up and realized that it was all just a dream...4 -
Laptop has died. This is probably a significant blocker to development...
Oh well time to buy a new one I guess!1 -
Wow, great read for anyone that's interested.
https://linkedin.com/pulse/...
For example, this snippet is very true and I guess a lot of use know it. (It's how I became a programmer).
1 -
I've been working remotely for more than 6 months, but today it's the first time I'm coding wearing only underpants
Living the dream4 -
Just did an internship test for Autodesk and came away from it with the conclusion that I'm really stupid.
May as well give up on my dreams.4 -
Finally I got a dream job! I'm so fucking happy 😁 That was my dream since I went to high school and finally I achieved it. I put a lot of work into it and I knew it will happen. So guys follow your dreams, it's an amazing feeling when they finally comes true 💪💪💪3
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FINALLY, all my dreams have come true, now I can totally say I don't really miss Linux all that much (although I work with Linux all the time, as all my VMs are on Ubuntu).
Obviously, Microsoft has a port of the ssh client and server on windows.
28 -
I normally just have nightmares about the projects I'm working on, especially when I struggle with a bug for days. Those are usually about just me stressing out about it. However, I have a lot of dreams about computers/technology, not necessarily coding-related:
- datacenters were just potato fields. If you go work the field, you'd go data mining
- in Biology, when being taught how having children works, you only tell that "parenting is only chmod-ing the rights of your children until they become the owners themselves"
- IP addresses with emojis instead of numbers were a standard now and they actually managed to replace IPv4, because everyone was so into emojis. They named it IPvE
- I witnessed a new Big Bang when the 32-bit Unix time overflown in 2038, and we were all quantum bits3 -
I'm a C++ dev, but last month I was working in the vegetable fields to help my young brother and his business. And right now I'm going to sleep outdoor after my birthday party looking at the stars.
Free spirit is a good point dealing with free languages like C++ you know :D
Sweet dreams btw :p -
Can you feel nostalgic for the things you have done only in dreams?
I did today.
Fuck my loneliness.3 -
My dream project is to continue and improve my gaming website. It's a blog & community that's supportive of (but not limited to) female gamers. It's a positive place for gamers of any type to go, judgement free.
I have so many big ideas for the site, a forum, possibly user profiles, gaming quizzes and trivia, lots more ways to interact. I would love to do like a "find the right game for you" type of thing and have more time to blog..but I just simply don't have the time right now. :(
Baby steps for now. 🎮4 -
Documentation? That's the stuff of dreams for us.
Instead we have ancient code written by people who have long left / forgotten with no idea what the cryptic mess they left behind does. -
There was this place somewhere in the ocean called “United Paper Island”, a bit like paper towns, but a real one. You could only get there via a private jet or a ship that came only like every three months or something. the island was small and… eerie. There was a large bus stop-looking hub in the middle of the island, and it also had streets/housing, but things looked off. Some streets resembled well-known places like Fifth Avenue or Champs-Élysées, but not quite. Everything was half abandoned, and felt like Half-Life 2 maps. A small town that was just a bit too silent. The plot was that we moved there temporarily, and I went for a walk trying to convince ppl that it was okay, it was fine, just a regular place. But I had a gut feeling it was not okay at all.
Then my stupid brain decided to imagine what it would feel like to be buried alive on this island, specifically waking up inside the coffin underground. Then I felt like I was suffocating, and I finally woke up.
First thing I did was immediately grabbing my laptop, opening google maps and trying to find this island. “Paper Island” and “United Paper Island” yielded nothing, obviously. But I _knew_ the location.
As I was scrolling around the map, it felt like that knowledge was being erased. I felt that. Just like someone connected to my brain, selected certain files and hit “delete”. After 20 seconds, it was over.
Now I don’t know where this island is.15 -
Inside Microsoft Palo Alto, the office where only women work: a surgery! The kidney is a frag grenade.
Left to right: white coat, black coat holds kidney (frag), a girl in “sleep” T-shirt, a girl that holds a gun. Meanwhile, my gun’s barrel was made from that fridge flexible magnet material. I fixed it using rainworms as glue.
Now we’re entering my uni teacher’s brain, trying to make her give me a passing grade, all while she sings.
It’s just two of us here. Inside her, we fuse into one. Now we sing too:
🎵 We are Scottish — 🎵
🎵 A batshit crazy thing to be, 🎵
🎵 Trying to be normal 🎵
Xiaomi made a torture device for home that was quite popular in Kazakhstan. -
An incomplete list of 2018 personal dev goals:
* do more web development (It's fun. In a crude way.)
* finish the smart lamp I started building in 2016 ...
* fix up more electronic devices while learning their inner workings
* learn Python and some other language
* get myself a blog again
* get that testautomation thing which is haunting me in my dreams already to production
* be more relaxed
* do some home automation while not cursing all that much -
My school love. While she was laying on my bed inside two giant wallets — one for the head and one for the body — she explained the following:
- how to find the nearest McDonald’s when McDonald’s ceases to exist
- how to do a super long jump in Nintendo DS Pokémon games
- why a person turned into blur usually achieves more2 -
Oh God I've so much work left that I'm seeing approximations of Gaussian distribution everywhere
Even in dreams -
I will major in AI. No, I will major in Big data, wait, I want to major in cloud too. I think I should first complete the courses I enrolled on cloud academy or the tens of courses in enrolled on Udemy on all the domains possible first! So many technologies, so many dreams!
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My new co-worker, a Jr. developer who started 2 weeks ago told me; "I am starting to see in my dreams the solutions of my tasks."
"Welcome to the club.", I said. :P1 -
Does anyone have recurring nightmare dreams about school?
I still get them even though it's > 10 years. Usually my dreams are about maths exams where I can read the question paper but can't make out the question.
Then other days I see myself walking up to class and I don't have my school bag with me.
Other times, I know my exams are gone bad and I barely wrote anything on the answer sheet and submitted it.
Other times, I see myself without pants in my classroom and everyone is pointing and laughing at me.5 -
CAUTION: possibly NSFL
There was a war. We lived in a leftist camp inside an abandoned railway station. The only thing that could break the siege was BLA
[dream fragment lost]
So they lined us up. There were ten of us.
— Do you want the leftist future?
— No…, they made me say.
— Do you love capitalism?
— Yes…, they made me say.
— Ты готова присниться?, they asked my female comrade ("are you ready to come to our soldiers in their dreams to support them?")
— Yes.
— Ты готов расшибиться?, they asked me ("are you ready to work your ass off, dying in the process if necessary?". It also makes a perfect rhyme with the previous Russian sentence)
— Yes.
Then, they tied our hands and hung us onto a rack. They doused us with gasoline.
— Look. Czechoslovakia had Jan Palach. We have ten Jan Palachs now!
They set us on fire. I feel an unimaginable pain. I wake up for ten minutes.
When I fell asleep again, I found out I survived. But, my body underwent modifications: first, I now had a vinyl shell instead of my skin. Underneath it were raw muscles. Second, I no longer had vocal cords. I no longer had voice.
In this world, we were slaves ("Тяговые люди") ruled by BLA. There were no prisons. Instead, there were only two punishments: the "light" one and the "heavy" one. First one is your shell getting ripped off. You die in around 20 minutes of agonizing pain, like mink that is skinned alive in Chinese leather tanneries. But, compared to the second one, that was a slap on the wrist.
The "heavy" punishment was them injecting you with "The Ferment". Immediately, your mind is altered into total obedience. Then, your body begins to turn into corpse juice. To outside observers, you die in 30 days. But for you, it feels like forever, as time speeds up indefinitely, and you're drifting into endless sorrow. When you die, no one notices, as your shell is still there. But instead of you, there's now nothing but corpse juice inside.
I now worked in some location that resembled Duke Nukem 3D's first map. My job was to remove those plastic shells. I had no bottom — it was replaced with a concrete cube that felt pain just like damaged tooth enamel does. An endless queue of shells moved in front of me. I had to remove their shells, to peel them off like vinyl.
Some people were alive underneath. They still had their skin. They thanked me, smile at me and wander away.
Some of them were alive, but had no skin. That means I was the one to execute a "light" punishment on them.
Some of them weren't there. I pop the shell open, and it deflates as corpse juice pours out.
One of my previous dreams was the following:
"— We arrange surgeries when in-person interventions are _not recommended_.
— So…, — I press the pause button on the handrail.
— The perfect maiden. Inside a plastic shell. 80 years old underneath."
Now I understand it. The first speaker was a BLA researcher. "I" was an investor. The "perfect maiden" was me, but way in the future from my today's dream. It all fits together.
Now, here's the discovered part of kiki universe so far:
- rotten meat house
- swine gray gel battleground
- horizontal elevators network
- united paper island
- baseball bat nightclub
- anxiety-inducing multidimensional pizzeria
- NEW! BLA headquarters
- NEW! demilitarized burning ground abandoned train station
- NEW! Duke Nukem 3D people skinning ground10 -
Okay this is 3.30 AM . Just woke up from bad geeky dreams. My heart is pounding so fast that I could nose bleed and I can't sleep as I am remembering I had the same dream last night.
Dream was about : me being astronaut. Everything was usual. From rocket launch to be in space. Scary part was my ship in orbit of moon.
Seeing dead land from that height chocked me. Imagine you are looking out of the window and all you see a big grey land and pitch black in background. Realising there is no one out there was spooky.
The scary part was I launched some satellite but crash on surface. It was scary seeing something going smaller every time. Crashing on deserted land was one plus on adding fear.
Then my ship leave the orbit (from the reverse shock of that satellite dittachment ) and it flow away in the vastness of space......
Away from the moon and away from the earth in long loneliness.
I wish I could erase this from my memory but I am not gonna watch space exploration video anymore.
I got to say, landing on moon is one thing but being out there knowing one accident and you will be forever there. You need balls to be on such missions.4 -
I started at a what is now called a brogrammer shop. While the three owners were probably 50 and older, there was little design outside of the owner's dreams. We busted out programs in the new language C# in three tier architecture with an Access backend. It was fun but when the economy went south I got laid off after about a year.
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"I've recently lost someone who really meant lots for me, we worked together for years, he new all about me, he even saved my dreams, projects and hobbies, such a great memory ..."
"What was his name?"
"D:\"1 -
Family... I respond with song title:
Boulevard of broken dreams.
Our paths don’t cross anymore. I don’t know why. I don’t want anything from them cause I know the consequences (maybe that’s why). I am not missing them and they’re not missing me so I think it’s a win win situation.1 -
Celebrities were randomly offered a drug that, when ingested, teleported you to a Dark Souls-style fighting ring. Out-of-bounds 5-meter-tall abominations, one of which was Stretch Armstrong named Arnold (based on Arnold Schwarzenegger), were pounding on you really hard. If you survived, you would wake up as if nothing had happened. If you died, your reality was altered to be exactly the same, except one thing: a $100 bill now featured an actor that looked like a child of Nicolas Cage, Tupac Shakur and the guy from the PhilipSoloTV YouTube channel. His name was Dubius Building. He always wore a suit that was a bit too large for him, and had his signature half-smile. Everyone used to love him in the early 00s.
Little did they knew, the competition was rigged from the start. Abominations were invincible all along.4 -
Lets talk about our dream phone!
Here's what mine would be...
Screen: 1440p AMOLED highly saturated screen.
CPU: Snapdragon 845 (Or whatever is on top)
RAM: 4-6 GB
Storage: 16 GB internal OS reserved storage for the OS only but on the side would have 2 slots with the same locking mechanism as the sim tray to hold 2 hot swapable storage or battery modules.
OS: A modular version of stock android (By modular i mean a version of stock android that is designed to be installed on any device)
Speaker: Dual front facing stereo
Ports: 2 usb-c ports on the bottom.
Special features: A portable desktop experience that when plugged into a monitor would give a chromeOS style experience with the phone acting as a touchpad.7 -
dfox returned to sell custom avatars for $7/mo. Y’all laughed, then some Chinese spammer with mspaint avatar took over the platform while retoor justified his actions2
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You know how you wake up from a bad dream?
I just woke up in the middle of the night, without any memory on any dream, but rather two people talking to each other on discord.
All I can remember was:
A: (garbled) you know when you ALT+CTRL+SHIFT+G?
B: (interrupts the other) 1,2,3... yeah when you want to move the windows to the other screen?
Both started to laugh.
I fully woke up, got a glass of water and went back to sleep. I’ve never, ever used that shortcut in any program.4 -
A chemical reaction between helium and krypton is impossible, but if you force it, the byproduct will be a single atom of barium with the diameter of roughly the earth orbit. It will blink in and out of existence, taking everything it covered with it. Yes, including the sun itself.
His backpack started to immediately get heavier and heavier, and it became apparent that lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian3 -
Thought experiment time:
Imagine that this whole universe is a simulation created by a Group Of Developers (GOD).
- Who would make up this group?
- What kind of design patterns would they follow?
- What type of programming language would they use?
- What kind of bugs are there if any?
- How do they test?
- Assuming the use of quantum computing, what are the implications? Parallel simulations? All possibilities play out?
- Would the controller input be life?
- Who is AI and who are players?
- Has all time already been rendered?
- Do we respawn?
- What would the leaderboard look like?
- What kind of stats are tracked
- What are dreams, nightmares, lucid dreams, sleep paralysis, birth and death?
- How is memory stored, accessed and pruned?
- What kind of neural net is used and where?
etc etc, if you can think of any other interesting fire away8 -
I came to the abandoned stock exchange to scour the ground for valuables left behind by dead brokers who killed themselves here. Watches, golden lighters, jewelry — all wanted to no one. I didn't care about where they came from. I was okay with wearing an old watch that I pulled off a skeleton hand.
Brittany had been missing for a while now. She lost custody of her kids, but everyone knew that was because Lake Mead turned them into calcified sculptures that got progressively tinier and tinier. Her though? Not so much. She was crying while fiddling with Lego-sized figurines of what was her children. “I don't care what anyone else says, I'm gonna make it right for you, because I FUCKING have a PURPOSE!”
The detached palm of my once school friend gripped mine. Couldn't get it off with force, so I stuck it you know where — I think he was disgusted, but his palm ran away quickly.
Another friend — uni friend now — was interested in making as much gesheft as he could during the semester. He had it on his reel-to-reel recorder. He didn't want to share his insights, but $500 made him talk. He was disgusted, though, as bills had my saliva on them. In exchange, I got the ability to pump whatever music I liked in the lecture room, as it was now mine. I didn't have to study — I already had a job. My uni was my coworking.
The last floor featured the room of nineteen Neins — a foot buttons that, when pressed in the correct order — will reveal the rape bathroom. It was huge and outdoorsy.4 -
Goddamn... Microsoft has a problem with their Bots and their behavior. Bing AI is absolutely unhinged and do y'all remember when Tay lost her shit?
I think Microsoft needs to just bury their dreams of making good AI... They're not good at it. 😂3 -
Windows... Thou art a fickle mistress...
How dost thou survive the most deadly code written by the most wearied devs yet cannot survive the adding of one of thine own features using thine own "turn windows features on or off"?
Thine face now turns blue each time thou art awakend only to again enter the sleep like death.
Leaving naught but the riddle of "service_critical_failure" each time before departing to the realm of dreams.2 -
My university had its half-abandoned tenth floor reserved for fringe scientists. To deter onlookers from going there, the only elevator was locked out, reserved only for uni staff.
As long as you didn’t make drugs there, you were fine. It was dusty, smelled of mold and was full of old Soviet gear. Outdated, sure, but better than nothing.
If you were a student preoccupied with some fringe theory, it was a safe space for you.1 -
Millions of shattered dreams. Possibly the worst emotional pain.
Haters might love this state of mine.3 -
My drunk grandpa decided to cook fried eggs by just throwing them as-is on an electric burner. They started to explode, smoke filled the small room with no windows. I took my younger sister and we ran away, but the smoke made her turn into a red cat.
Meanwhile, my actual cat slipped into a cavern of quicksand. My cat sister stumbled and started to slide into it too, but I was able to save her. Now she’s crying.
A rabid raccoon attacked me. He has a voice of Nick Wilde from Zootopia, and dirty needles for his teeth. I hold it by his neck, my older sister appears out of nowhere. I don’t know what to do to make the raccoon go away.
For context, she has confirmed IQ of around 140 in the real world. She tells me that the most efficient way to do that is to remove its eyes. Raccoon disagrees. She tells me she’s about to patent a device that removes rabid animals’ eyes easily with no hassle. She then proceeds to pull out a crudely fashioned rusty thing which is just an altered door hinge and proceeds to pop out raccoon’s eyes. She throws them away. Raccoon gets calm and wanders off, stumbling into everything.
I go back to my trailer. I try to park it into a better spot, but it falls on its side. As I escape it, a living rubber helper bolus, a good sibling of the felonious bolus from a PilotResSun’s video, is already there. He tells me it’s a rapist-only zone, and I should be careful.
https://youtube.com/watch/...
3 -
I been practising lucid dreaming since a few years. It works and is amazing. Now I'm trying to use this moment of subconscious awareness to improve my ideas when sleeping. Yes, I kinda want to work in my dreams, when my brain has other mechanisms active. Can tell you, looks like it is possible!
Your thoughts???4 -
Happy new years! I hope you are able to take steps towards or end up accomplishing your dreams this year. You all have the best genitals and are very attractive. If you run into anyone IRL very less fortunate than you, consider letting them rant to you and maybe lending them a helping hand. Theres lots of unfortunate voices unheard out there. Keep being the best and don’t let the world get you down!1
-
I think work is finally getting to me, I had crazy dreams last night full of stack traces. Woke in a cold sweat...
-
Me and my aunt. We put a whole frozen chicken into the microwave. After the frost is gone, it starts moving.
“Boiling moisture”, we think. Then, the chicken awakens. “Leave it to boil, lobsters are boiled alive after all”, says my aunt. “No! We’re microwaving a live animal! That’s torture!”, I scream in panic. We switch the microwave off. Chicken — out. No skin, hellish red meat, severe burns. It tries to scream but can’t. I need to put it out of its misery, NOW.
Aunt says “hold it against the table, I’m going to break its neck”. I oblige, and she proceeds to crush its neck with a two-by-four. It turns out, the neck is basically rubber and doesn’t budge. I have a better idea: let’s do something to its brain directly. I take a pin and proceed to find its skull. But there is no skull to be found, just a capri-sun for its head, with a small pocket of something squishy. The chicken keep wheezing loudly, desperate to scream. I poke that pouch with a pin. It splits in half, spilling the insides — gray chalk.
“It’s gone”, says aunt. “Its suffering is over”.
I sigh in relief. That was quite a cooking experience.
Thank god I woke up. It was just a dream.2 -
Ranchonyx built a huge monument of himself in the city he lived in, with him as a member of the Team Rocket3
-
An idea which was once your dream.
You worked very hard.
You exhausted all your time.
Your no.1 priority is your dream then family.
Your sleepless nights were comforted by naps.
You dropped out of school.
You stopped your lovely job.
Finally, you succeeded.
You brought the dream to life. Hurray!
You were very excited including the people around you.
... And then
One rich dude came by... -
Tanya died the first, in the seventies. My home that, at that point, was nothing but an Escher-escue collection of ladders with Australian backpack CCTV cameras hanging from the walls, was below their flat. First death — seventies, then eighty-four, the ninety-one, and then yesterday. All that time, without any way of exiting the apartment, they marinated in corpse juice.
It finally started dripping from the ceiling yesterday.
Steel tapes weren't a good remedy.4 -
I found a new whisper in your tech, and now your razor won’t work because of vague religious propaganda.5
-
Chocalate filled donuts are demonic they taste like they are filled with hopes and dreams, but every single one of them probably carries the amount of sugar a human can ever need in his life time. And I can feel my life span getting lower and lower with each bite I take. And in the end of th day I will look at my chocalate covered hands and cry 😂1
-
When you are dreaming about you being stuck in a never ending loop of string escape... Nightmares...1
-
Problem of developers
When he tries to sleep at night, the code he wrote that day comes to his mind and he starts thinking opps I would have done that in a better way like this. I would have optimised that function like this. ok tomorrow I will do these changes.1 -
A CPU intensive and pointless program to determine the font of text in a picture.
I didn't get past downloading every single google font. TTF drawing bug crushed my dreams. Will upload files to github if you want to see the mess
PS wanted to write it in Python lol7 -
Leaving work with a task only partly completed just guarantees my mind is going to obsess about it all night and my dreams will be plagued with lines of code.1
-
Oh my fucking god.
So, basically, I’m at some mall with Violet Parr, but I’m not Dash. I’m someone else entirely, but still a Mr. Incredible’s child. Producers connect to my thoughts and say “Go to the bathroom”. I oblige, go in and see Mr. Incredible naked, absolutely destroying Frozone’s asshole bareback. He doesn’t see me.
Then, I go meta: “Well, producers now probably want me to find another bathroom!”
Mens' one is closed. Ladies one is open though. “Wait, if Mr. Incredible is there, and we’re in The Incredibles universe, we’re probably not in Russia, and no one will bully me, a little trans kid, if I go to the ladies' bathroom”. I go in and lock myself inside a stall.
Music plays. A hellish hybrid of Tessa Violet from “Crush” (https://youtube.com/watch/...) and Orla Gartland (https://youtube.com/watch/...) enters the bathroom. The movie suddenly becomes a musical.
As she approaches my stall, she sings:
🎵 Deep down inside, we’re still transphobic 🎵
🎵 Deep down inside, I’m still transphobic 🎵
🎵 But it’s my way to tell the world 🎵
🎵 To shut 🎵
🎵 The fuck 🎵
🎵 UUUUUp 🎵
She proceeds to demolish and twist the stalls.
Suddenly, we see her flashback (well, technically a flash-forward), and there she gives a Ted talk. But it’s a Klan rally, and it’s Ted x KKK. She says the punchline:
“Well, isn’t it _nuts_ 😏
that I twisted steel beams into a thousand _knots_ 😏👉”
The audience erupts into laughter.
We’re back. I run away from her. Cops arrive, and I’m connected directly to Barely Sociable’s video from the future (relative to my present) about Ruth Price (https://youtube.com/watch/...), the phone call segment. The original audio is replaced by Tessa/Orla’s voice. She calls cops and says “We’re placed into custody for bullying a trans faggot kid!”
The cop replies, mocking her: “That’s baaaad 🤣, that’s probably baaaaaad 🤣”
Off-screen laughter.
Roll credits.
Jack-Jack Parr is trans, confirmed.
7 -
When you find a cool job in the language of your dreams and it says "Senior Developer" but you have no "work" experience with language...
-
Magic: The Gathering, now with Holo Lens or similar. Pokémon Stadium, Yugi Oh, all these games or series giving you a real atmosphere experience.
-
— What is this malleable metal that is awfully convenient to make all sorts of things from?
— It’s lead. It is considered harmful by some.
— Nah, I don’t think so.
*proceeds to make pipes, solder in plumbing, glazed pottery, crystal glassware, cooking pots, utensils, paint on kitchen walls or utensils, foil used to wrap food, seals on wine bottles, weights in fishing or curtain weights stored near food, storage containers for food or drink, gasoline additives, water fountains in schools, candy wrappers, ink on food labels, bottle caps with liners, food can solder, ceramic dishware, spice containers, children’s lunchboxes, toys, baking molds, measuring spoons and kettles out of lead*16 -
Woke up with this parts song playing in my head though probably the first time in maybe 10 years...
So I googled the part I somehow remembered and got back an exact match and full lyrics... and an MV.
Sweet Dreams (Are Made Of This) (Official Video)
I start watching the MV....
https://youtu.be/qeMFqkcPYcg
And saw this so I'm like wait how old is this song... Apparently 1983...
I wasnt even born then lol
7 -
Google enslaved me to conduct their experiments on me, and now when I use a -webkit prefixed css property, I feel excruciating pain. They made me have intercourses with horses and bite my wife to death.1
-
At this point, honestly, just to change to a business degree and work on being content instead. I have to go a good 20 years back tho, and change all my childhood dreams and aspirations too.
(I had a thick head and really wanted to work with robots. 😐)12 -
A telecom engineering friend of mine asked me if I wanted Backnowýk — a strange brew made of cherries and strawberries that, if you brew it just right, is both lemonade and yogurt, depending on how you hold a glass of it. Straight angle relative to the floor makes it yogurt, but change that angle, and it fades into being lemonade. But if you don't drink it fast enough, it turns into blood.
So, I drank it and gained an ability to slam dunk leather balls, and since then, for every football game I'm in (I don't know how to play soccer though), there is a basketball hoop just for me, and when I dunk, my team scores.
Went for a walk. Met the lead singer of Death Grips — MC Ride. He wrote me a gay ballad:
🎵 Please take me to recording studio Portland🎵
🎵 Please take me to the recording place digital🎵
🎵 Aniverse🎵
🎵 Aniverse🎵
🎵 [DREAM FRAGMENT LOST]-verse🎵 -
Do you guys ever wake up early shaking with cortisol thinking about code? I woke up super early bc my anxious ass brain thought I had to have an implementation plan and architecture setup for my dreams before I could truly stay asleep4
-
So I've been working with this company for like 3 years now, my only issue with it is I'm kinda underpaid (1.3K/month in Italy).
Today I had an interview at another company, like 1km away from this one, and it feels promising, the only difference would be in the products: here I make web-based stuff and VR apps, in the new one, I'd just be there incapsulating AI into other stuff for medical and industrial usage, using python and a lot of other stuff I never used or that I haven't used in the past 3 years or so...
Current company is made of me, boss and dude who works on social medias
New company is 17 people and many of them are engineers, mathematicians... more focused on what I actually do/like to do
Current company would go through quite a hard time without me (hardest projects were entirely developed by me + design/css from boss/other)
What would you do? My dream job is to make videogames with my own ideas (but can't rely on that to earn money)6 -
“iPhones powered by lenin
Nice to have legs”
Another kiki dream. I wrote this down at 6 am, then fell asleep again. I have NO CLUE what it means. It made sense then, but makes none now.1 -
After being abducted and enduring torture, I injected the serum and became blur. Translucent black, with a red heart. I can make people disappear. Me putting someone inside my heart makes them feel 10,000 years of hell before they die.
-
As soon as I'm starting a project in my spare time again, I'm starting to dream in code again..
Came up with a solution in my sleep though.2 -
At 4am there was some random youtuber in my head that reads reddit posts and he presents me one but it's blurry and he says hi there how you there are stupid but how stupid you are, humming hammers,
MOMMY THATS SWEET MIAMI MOMMY THATS SWEET MIAMI he's insecure go back then hayeens HIGH WINS HIGH WINS HIGH WINS HIGH WINS and he never stops
It literally feels like a broken neural network output, meaningless. But it's in my head, I never asked for this but it's there generating itself1 -
— You and other scientists like you., — my sister said after tasting a half cake half cookie, made with wall mold instead of yeast. — You liked to say “no fate”, implying each one chooses their own path as science liberated them. People are equal. You’re right though: they are. They’re equally fragile and meaningless. They indeed have no fate; not because of freedom, but because the bomb you made will obliterate everyone on this planet. There will be no survivors. No fate indeed.
— Wait, but…, — I replied.
— Now go. Lay down in an empty hall somewhere its not real, generated procedurally. You dying there will maybe make me forgive you.2 -
Skinned my mother alive. She didn’t feel a thing. Threw away everything except the skin itself, but left the head intact. She’s alive and well, albeit can’t move. I roll her up, pack her in my bag and bring her to school with me.
She wasn’t quite against it, but wasn’t happy either. Just kept talking to me condescendingly, as usual.
Meanwhile, my grandpa recreated his room in Excel and moved there.5 -
My manager sent me a Desktop screen without informing me and I also didn't ask for the same. Now, he wants me to use it. And i am like, WTF 😡😡. Who the fuck told you in ur dreams to send me this shit.7
-
I have dreams where I stare at code/tables/program output, half of the problems are real and half are made up, I wake up stressed out about not solving anything and trying to remember which is the real half I need to solve.
Why can't I dream about the video games I play? I need to get a life... -
In the early 2010s, at select locations, Nokia Oro phone was offered bundled with a portable IPL hair removal device. Its enclosure was made entirely of leather, layers upon layers of compacted leather of different kinds. It gave you access to Queer Mode™ — engage it and have sex with any of your thoughts. Your mind was your oyster, but it was in fact being turned into a two-bedroom all-white apartment designed by Karim Rashid.
As the tech was getting older, the only way to source capacitors was syncing your Alienware table clock with the root node using a non-laptop that had shapeshifting black goo for keyboard.
Small puppy that ran Windows 8 was always smothered in shit. The white non-kitten ran Nokia’s version of QNX.
9 -
Slovenia: when the tools are made in Germany, but the materials are made in China.
Rich European countries are 2004 Brazil during the championship. Every other country is just 2004 Brazil.2 -
Very old vsauce is my grandpa. He comes to me to solve a crime of a man that made 1850000 html links by hand1
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Recep Tayyip Erdogan had a problem — after his army service, he got so used to cold that he could only sleep on a raw, cold metal grill. Usually, normal people put mattress on top, but Erdogan didn’t feel right this way. So, in one of his personal prisons, he established a social project for making a full metal bed for himself.
For starters, to calculate the shape, he took the smallest man ever (3 inches high) with his fingers and sunk him into molten plastic. “What are you doing?! It hurts!” — man screamed. “Shut up. You’re on an important mission. Your motherland won’t forget you.”
After three months, the bed was ready. It was more of the same — metal bars, but this time with some kind of structure built of metal hinges, rebar and strong springs. This was the day — this was the big reveal event. It took place in the same prison — three prisoners were ready to lay on their new full metal beds, while news crews congratulated Erdogan and celebrated his greatness. “Well, it is time!” — he said.
Prisoners laid flat. An awful screeching sound. Prisoner number two is bleeding out. The spring mechanism broke out and impaled his chest onto a large metal bar. He’s not breathing.
“Shut it down. Shut it all down. No more cameras, no more news”, — said Erdogan.
“Yes, our master”, — said news crews.
They wanted to draft me to Afghanistan.
“No!”, — a young officer shouted, misgendering me — “He doesn’t know the stages of pain. Useless.”
“Are you perhaps arguing pain with a bipolar patient?” — I replied.
“You are a rave. Nothing but a rave.”
Raves spawned near your doors at night. Sometimes, they even spawned on the inside. I can’t say you were in danger, but it certainly wasn’t a pleasant thing to happen to anyone. They looked ugly. They dressed weird. They spoke in riddles.
“How do I move to Europe?”, — a rave asked.
“I…”
“Shut up!”
Rave took a door, suspiciously painted over and over multiple times, and started to slam my door with it, using it as a ram.
My door started giving in.
Alarm system.
On a separate note, to disable the alarm system, you have to speedrun Stanley Parable. It’s the hardest speedrun ever, specifically its hidden ending. It disables all alarm systems in three-mile radius IRL. No one knows how it works, but it does. Back to the danger zone!
“The better quality time you spend sitting on your toilet, the more you’ll live.”, — an officer said.
“I once had a girl blow me while I was shitting,” — Matthias replied — “You have nothing on me.”
“Fair enough!”
It is a little known fact, but the liquid that Northern cities use to clean up snow isn’t quite what it seems like. It’s not salt — in reality, there are bases on Mars, and they store pink goo that… “iMpRoVeS” dead bodies. The liquid is biological in nature, and it expires. Expired liquid is recycled as snow melter. You learn that in high school, but now, living on a train, you should know that there are special learning rooms here, in every. single. carriage. The small gym ball with two handles on its sides is called Gandhi ball. Fun fact: if you wear headless Segways on top of your shoes, and then lay flat holding a Gandhi ball, you can reach the speed of 270 kph!
Today’s news: a Reddit moderator and a legless woman gave birth to a living sex toy for their domestic boar.2 -
Here are the parts of kiki dreams universe explored so far:
- rotten meat house
- swine gray gel battleground
- horizontal elevators network
- united paper island
- baseball bat nightclub
- anxiety-inducing multidimensional pizzeria
Which one will be your destination this Christmas?1 -
Tonight I've dreamed that tsoding was writing a sudoku solver. Even in my dreams I'm a nerd. Why no streamii ones or a kiki-like one? This is why I can't design anything, huge lack of imagination. I'm borderplain. It's a mental issue now. Need help and medicine5
-
DREAM 1
(my comments look like this)
A kikiland metro system. It's extradimensional and shapeshifting. When you enter it, it adapts to your needs. The people inside (they're probably just vinyl shells), the social circumstances, all generated for you.
When you enter it, it knows where you want to go. It spawns exactly one train just for you. It will be the first, it will be the last. You have to catch it to go where you need. If you miss it, there will be no more trains, and you have to wait till the metro station closes for the night and reopens.
It's always you entering, catching the train that arrives just in time, going to where you need to go and exiting.
Because of its extradimensional nature, you cannot agree to meet someone there — every person has their own personal metro generated just for them every time, with exactly one train going exactly to the station you need.
It's used by BLA as a form of control. When they don't want you to go somewhere, the train won't spawn. Or, it might diverge and get you to some other place. It isn't known whether the map can be altered on the fly or not. So far, the consensus is that the map is persistent and is a public knowledge, and it's just the metro itself that is extradimensional. But, no one ever saw the real metro in its real form, and not the top layer that protrudes into the three-dimensional world you can interact with. It might be the case that they can make people disappear by creating ad-hoc stations that don't intersect with the real world, trapping them in places that are nowhere in particular.
(it took seeing BLA once in one dream to make all the following dreams include them. Sigh.)
Kikiland also has a school, and it always had it. I befriended a chemistry teacher there. His classroom is small — exactly as deep as other classrooms, but really narrow. There are no desks there, just his desk and some bookshelves. Chemistry isn't a priority there — his class exists only because it should. No one attends it. This is why he was so pleased to meet me. Despite his classroom being located on a busy floor, its door is overlooked by students, and NO ONE ever enters it. He just sits there, waiting for students to arrive, but they never do.
He has a secret, though, because of course he does. In the game Control, if you complete the main storyline before you complete some side quests, one of the main characters will be sitting in the C-suit hall, doing her things, waiting for you to come and talk to her. But at the same time, she will be waiting for you deep down the oldest house's mines, again, just sitting there, waiting for you to take the quest. This teacher is the same.
If you have a good relationship with him, and you attend his class, the classroom will change to a tunnel entrance, with him being the security guard. He's your friend, he'll let you in. It looks like Fallout's vault entrance. THIS is how you enter the REAL kikiland metro. (Dream 1 ends here.)
Episode 2
Tiny waterborne rat puppies whose mouth is their entire face unfolding like a piece of paper with teeth covering it as a grid. (I wrote about them already, but here they are again.) They are _tiny_, a bit like tadpoles. Also, like tadpoles, they die if you touch them out of water. As I was flying over some mountain resort (I routinely fly in my dreams, but it feels more like a very low gravity falling I can control, like using a parachute in GTA San Andreas), I dumped them to a location that resembled the garden level of Prince of Persia: Warrior Within for my cat to eat. It didn't want to. -
I nearly never actually had to code for an interview, since I decided not to work in the gaming industry. Only ever I can recall was them asking me to define a templating engine / Syntax of my dreams.
-
I'm a web developer that would like to do some game development. I focus on front end, and have done backend work (not a lot of databasing, though). I mainly use JavaScript and Python, with enough knowledge of Java, C#, and PHP to get by when I need to. I've also got a background in graphic design.
What aspects of game development might be a good fit for my skillset?
Where and how do I get started? I've looked at Phaser in the past, since it was inspired by Flixel, a Flash game library I used for a some simple projects in college.3 -
Recently I've had a lot of realistic dreams and it's awful. For example, yesterday I dreamed that I have a SoftEng lecture on Monday at 9am. The day before I dreamed that Russia defeated Ukraine and are now neighbors with Hungary. On both occasions I was later convinced that the memory fragments were true until I either received conflicting news or some unrelated trigger reminded me of the later, unrealistic parts of the dream.
I can sort of deal with the possibility that my current life is a dream and I'll eventually wake up and start over from an unspecified morning, but the possibility that while living in reality an arbitrary subset of my memories comes from dreams is much worse3 -
So the work from home is going like, I'm coding in dreams too. It's been more than 3 days, I have successfully completed more than one module😂
I guess it is happening with everyone. -
There is a subreddit called “Thomas the Plank Engine”, where people share memes from their dreams.
This is my entry. The second pic is supposed to be a man crying in the bed with their phone, but that's the best pic I've found.
4 -
Dreaming in Code!
I know very little code at this point. Mostly HTML, CSS and a sprinkling of JavaScript and Python.
That was clearly enough for my brain to generate some imaginary lines and fill the gaps in a night of wild dreams.
I guess any code language works much like human languages with grammars, vocabularies and punctuations.
So dreaming in code isn't all that odd?!
Whether you're learning Japanese or JavaScript, Portuguese or Python, you need to read, repeat and regurgitate.
I hope that's what my mind attempted last night. Not the most visually inspiring of dreams, but certainly vivid.
Has anyone else experienced something similar? Has anyone tried applying language learning tricks to learning coding?8 -
Focus: Get up and walk around, disturb someone(calculated disturbing), break a window,
Procrastinating: DO IT NOW, JUST DO IT, MAKE YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE
....sorry
Yes my 2 cents -
The nation of Vietnam started worshipping me as their god because I made a mod for Winamp that turned it into an IDE.3
-
Had a dream that some trans girl fell in love with me here on devRant, then sending a picture with abstract schizo graffiti with my name to me
I woke up in search of evidence. Went through my phone, didn’t find where to look to see my browser history. Then, every button in the bottom bar were replaced with small 32x32 px ad. That’s when I knew it was a dream too, a dream within dream
Woke up again. Was teleported to a huge liminal water park that is also a mall, and then I was like wait, it’s a part of kikiverse, so it must be yet another dream layer
Woke up again. Typing this. See ya7 -
!Rant
Wishing all my fellow Devs a Merry Christmas!!
May all your Dev & non-Dev dreams come true, may your annoying colleagues stop annoying you!! -
The default girl. A girl without name. Blonde, young, in high school. Her name is whatever the most popular female name is right now. It changes. She must dress in the most popular clothing, she must accept name changes, she must shape her entire being around zeitgeist. Otherwise, she's punished severely, and sometimes it's cruel even, by no one other than her own parents. Raising a kid like this is a part of the ritual.
— Gotcha. I caught this cat, and because it makes its own replicas, you must release the cat you caught, as we should only catch one cat one time.
— No. Look closely! I wasn't lying when I told you cats of this breed had a life expectancy of two years. There are clones of two cats, not one.
— Oh… Yes, this one is kinda… dim? Sad?
— I brought you a new cat. It's the same breed. Sorry that you're learning about their real life expectancy just now. Now get that damn girl and bring her to the facility.3 -
TL;DR: Brainfuck & Abstraction is so cool!
One of my dreams is to make a Mandelbrot Fractal with Brainfuck as the one on Rosetta Code.
I'm too lazy... So i'm writing a Compiler for Brainfuck.
At now i have 900 line of Python code and the operation VAR, SET, ADD, SUB, MUL with nested operation compatibility, IF, ELSE, ENDIF...
Probably i will doing it fast directly with BF but damn if abstraction is so cool!!4 -
They called it The Counterfeit Sun. Initially tested and deployed on The Cape of Good Hope in 1892, it was a shallow well with stone walls and a darkened needle-like protrusion in the middle. The Counterfeit Sun was able to turn a human body into damp dust in milliseconds.
With The Counterfeit Sun, soldiers fight better. People behave better in general, because no one wants to end up there. Even doctors and social workers perform better: while discarding corpses every day, they look at The Counterfeit Sun working, and they don’t want to make a round trip back to the station just to find out they’re the next to go.
Also, there were no corpses on the streets anymore. Take all of them to us, and we would get rid of them.
There was just one issue: sometimes, The Counterfeit Sun started glowing. At that moment, you knew you fucked up.15 -
At the end of the avenue, lived its creator. Well, used to leave. The weird half-house is hoarded, and his skeleton is there somewhere.
When flying above, I noticed a small enclave with fancy but small buildings. I put on my cloak and landed.
“What is it? It’s easier to answer what it is not”.
The hatch opened. I went in, about 30 meters. The hatch closed behind me. The tube-powered holographic screen lit up. “I think the secrets of the universe is more important than knowing today's weather”, she said, smiling.
I put on a blueprint of their superbug. Incurable, it had molecular ammo on it.
“Thanks”, I said, leaving. “Forgive my autistic antics. As for my cat, well, they copy their owners’ behavior, don’t they?”
And I took off.
I finally got some tattoos. I don’t know why, but all of them were about menstruation.
“I don’t want to let _him_ into our tattoo life club!”, my cousin said.
I then connected our M1A1 Abrams to a military tablet I stole from the avenue creator. “What’s that?”, my uncle said. “It’s the fourth time already that I get us new fiber optic cable. Think about my father! He’s dying!”
I hug my cousin. She was already dead.
This is why I’m stuck here. In the middle of nowhere, in a rusted trailer, naked, eating uncooked human meat from a dog bowl.7 -
A system of universally accessible storage. Here is what I mean:
1. The fastest protocol available would be used (LAN:smb, else:sftp)
2. File transfers would be direct (no download from A, upload to B)
3. Transfers could be resumed
4. Transparent to normal programs
5. Integrated with GUI file manager
But I'm extremely bad at C, so... -
I'd like to thank a certain person, who will remain unnamed, for some amazing advice and feedback. There are some truly great people out there, and you wont know until you go and look for them.
She showed me I'm not Brain (knew that one), but I'm probably not Pinky either.
Though I still desire to build giant robots and topple cities like Godzilla playing jenga.
Dont let your memes be dreams.3 -
Want to focus on increase my knowledge of C, Linux, rust or anything related to systems programming, practically the only jobs available in the country are web development jobs or Java, nothing else. So focus on my dreams or focus on not starving to death. This sucks.1
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Just got my acceptance letter to CodingDojo in D.C. I’m pretty excited! I start April 16th. 4 years I been waiting for this moment.
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Why is it that my code runs perfectly fine in my dreams, but the moment I wake up, it’s like it has developed a mind of its own? It’s like my code has a secret nightlife that I’m not privy to.2
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one night I posted " function smoking() * at my office conversation group and everyone stated asking what's that?
And I replied ahh nothing I'm just high, ignore it.
I was dreaming1 -
Open a youtube channel, create some tutorials. Build an audience and launch an unusually expensive course for them to buy.
this YouTuber is not selling course, they are selling dreams to people.
Shame3 -
Why am I, a level-headed, shy individual, a straight-up fucking psychopathic murderer in my dreams???
it's pbad, so bad i can't describe any of the dreams here without getting banné.4 -
While you developers are where you are, battling office politics everyday, scrumming, agiling and solving some of the world's toughest problems, I, for the past few nights, have been sitting for hours in-front of my computer, slipping into hour-long day-dreams while trying to determine my favorite ice-block flavor.
All I can say, is, it's either the yellow, orange, green, raspberry, cola, or the fairy-floss one.
And now I'm out of ice-blocks. ;-( -
I think I just figured out my problem. I can't think of any dream that I want. As I sat here, there is not a single thing that I could dream... I just wanted to stop feeling this way.1
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Both suicidal children and children dying of cancer do the same thing from time to time: they mimic a bird’s last song. Three short whistles in rapid succession.
When I saw Marc for the last time, he was asleep. It seemed like I scared him: he woke up in panic, did the whistle thing, pulled the boomerang from under his pillow and started hitting that dark spot on his arm with it. The spot was melanoma, but he was too young to understand it.
He died three days later. Then, we found glass shards inside his stomach.2 -
I became potus and wanted to cut military spending, but my cat learned how to pronounce the word “representative” and kept saying I was a bad representative1
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If you own a crossbow with silencer, you’re an enemy of USA, India, China, etc. mere ownership makes you an enemy of the state.6
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My very small 50k ppl hometown in the middle of russia was annexed by Toronto. Emily Haines, the lead singer of the band Metric, merged with my older sister, replaced the top of her head with a large CCTV camera, and then killed someone by throwing them off the roof using the force from Star Wars.1
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After the capsule started spinning, what seemed to be a suspended copper wire unfolded like an origami. Soviet tech not only looked cool, but was easy to repair. I loved every minute of marveling at this wire kaleidoscope before it overheated and went out with a bang — a small cap popped. I’ll recap it later.
…
Yellow foam covered my lips. They were gammas. -
Dreams do come true if you visualise and execute laser focus on your aims!
I’m going to be a partner (and mostly CEO) of my own company!6 -
Sometimes I hate coding just for the reason that my mind somehow finds a way to continue doing it in dreams.1
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Any white man can come to any black man and yell “license and registration!”
By law, black man must show his document.
If he doesn’t have it, he can do a little dance called license dance, and if the moves were good, white man can choose to not rat him out.9 -
/* wk54 */
I would like to resolve the problems of my code while i am taking a nap.
Every time that i get stopped , i´ll take a nap and resolve it in my dreams. Then, when I wake up, the code will be clear and the solution it always work!.
ALL DAY NAPPING !! -
because I lacked a portable storing solution (pockets weren't allowed), I couldn't find anything better than using my own skull as a storage box. It turned out it had way more room than expected. The brain itself is quite small, and the whole frontal lobe & the space around the brain is completely empty. Initially, opening the skull was scary and cumbersome, but the more you do it, the easier it gets. Once upon a time, when I tried to pop an acne on my forehead, the hole was revealed, and it led to the storage space beneath. I have no idea how it happened, but apparently the skin is too thin. The bone also looks much thicker from the inside. There were two wires — red and black — leading to a standard PC speaker every old computer had. I wasn't a cyborg, mind you, I merely put that speaker there for storage. The acne hole healed with those wires exposed, leaving a permanent mark due to the wire coloring pigment dissolving in my skin.
I used that storage space to hide the contents of some parcels I was processing back then. I was stealing things. Eventually, my coworker — Bruce Willis — confronted me, and I had to strangle him. My arm became very flexible, and I was able to wrap it around his neck several times during a chokehold. It didn't end well for both of us. -
The half-abandoned town of Chrysler, Arkansas (population of 3), was swiftly decommissioned as I noticed a characteristic bright yellow birthmark on her hand. “You have to choose” — I said, “unavoidable and painful death, or decommissioning and relocation. You live in a charred shed anyway.”
Prince The Elephant caught steelpox in 1937. It was alone in its compartment, locked out, as the evil fungus was slowly and painfully turning its body into cast iron. Rusty but ornate, 19th century metal throne was there too. The Throne was talking to Prince. When it spoke, it could put its words into your head as commands, as if there were your own thoughts. It did it so authoritatively that it seemed like the language itself was different, but it wasn’t.
The throne was coercing Prince into fusing together, cast iron to cast iron. Every day we heard Prince’s screams as steelpox was mutilating its body, as well as awful banging as Prince was stomping on The Throne, trying to silence it. The Throne didn’t budge. It just kept talking. Over the course of four months, it won Prince over.
Prince’s final agony was unbearable. As its throat and eyes were ironified, [dream fragment lost].
French public was largely empathetic. Throne-Prince was definitely still alive, although differently.
The American public, however, nicknamed it The Iron Freak. -
They added Fail Mode to Super Mario Odyssey — a set of ridiculously hard maps where you’re expected to fall down, but your gameplay is recorded, and in-game NPCs laugh at you. But, if you jump really far using boosters from Mario Kart, you can end up in rock climbing mode. When you reach the end, you get to a half-oasis, half-purgatory where there is a poker table, and other NPCs greet you.
There are a lot of chips, but they mean nothing — you got to invent your own rules. Among those chips, I found a surf green-colored micro SD card. I put it into my Switch, and the whole new game opened: a hybrid of Mario and Subway Surfers where I’m being chased by half-Peach, half-Thomas the Tank Engine.
When we reached the end, we lost our furry friend. But he was hiding in a dresser drawer, with a sex doll. Not an inflatable one, mind you, and not a silicone one either: the material resembled that of Barbie dolls.
She was a human-size, pretty Caucasian girl. I talked to her. Yes, she could talk, and the voice wasn’t robotic — she was definitely alive. Despite being a completely empty shell, she was conscious, albeit very dumb.
Her name was Near. This is the joke she told me:
— Knock-knock.
— Who’s there?
— Andy.
— Andy who?
— Andy who was imprisoned for sexual assault five years ago, duh! -
There are drones patrolling the Antarctic sky. When your plane gets too close, the drone fires up its jet engine and grabs you by the wing.
The drone's engine can overpower any small plane there is. It then proceeds to escort you towards the Antarctic base. Your safety during the transport is guaranteed by the drone's onboard missiles and decoy flares.
Once you reach the base, you get apprehended, imprisoned and tortured. A powerful pathological infosignal is then dispersed via the social media that makes anyone who knew you forget that you ever existed.
There were zero successful escapes.1 -
Should I study or not.
I'm in a rut, yet again. I have an opportunity to start a java certification. The course is going to cost me quite a bit, and i will have to loan from the bank. At the moment I'm struggling financially, but my dreams are set on programming.
Should I take it, or do I negate the risk and do what I'm comfortable with.5 -
i don't. and i'm not.
occasionally the thought that i will have some money on cigarettes and booze and the ability to forgwt about existential dread for a few days, that occasionally motivates me a bit, but that's about it. my ambition and dreams and will to do anything ia gone, and now i'm just coasting until such a time when coasting won't be possible anymore, and then i'm gonna jump out of the window or something. -
Became a surgeon. Because of hyper empathy, felt all the pain patients would’ve felt without anesthesia. Went completely insane. As my mind deteriorated, we opened an euthanasia hall in an old abandoned theater, somewhat near the landlocked United Paper Island. You can go to the version of the city where UPA is not actually an island through extradimensional pizzeria.1
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I had a dream that my code made me fly irl. I traveled at high speeds and noticed up and down. The whole dream theme was that of the sky when the sun makes it and the clouds turn pink. The feeling was like when u get a crush on a girl coder. I might theme a part of my game around it.
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Darth voor the hedgehog
Favorite drink: Red Bull sugar free
Favorite color: black
Tried to marry Cocteau twins lead singer
Carries an m14
When picked, can instantly retrofit your tv with a subwoofer that is really a guitar amp2 -
Yes, Gaurav didn't get in, but… your younger Aditya still needs a uni degree, right? And the government needs human skin. Gaurav is of no use anyway, he'll never make it without a degree. Let's fix things by making a mutually beneficial decision?
A good human hide went for around Ꙩ300. This is why parents made sure kids had good hygiene and no scars until the uni exams. A lower-grade hide was just Ꙩ30 and was only useful for “special” leather novelties.
Meanwhile, good hides made excellent high fashion coats for the royalty.
It was a shame that U-boat had to go down, burning all 70 crew alive. They were all 20 to 23.1 -
I was inside a BLA landmine factory. They use special chalk-like sulfur-infused concrete for shells — it is THE most painful thing to have under your skin. Their only goal is to maximize the pain of their victims.
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Digiton, the US state, was founded by Antonio Maria Digiton in 1972. It was reserved for NSFL content creators that mutilated small animals.1
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There is only one life what you want do now only because we don't know after mixing in the mud again we will come to this earth or not. So Trust in your self work for your dreams and catch them.
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BUZZ CUT GIRL REAL INFO:
Her name is Laurel. She's schizophrenic and severely autistic, so conversing with her is a challenge. She's the president of the Kiki Fan Club: an unofficial organization that is not what it seems. She constantly speaks in references to Kiki that Kiki herself doesn't understand, she quotes what Kiki never said, and she has pics of Kiki that don't show Kiki.
Kiki fan club is situated in a small room on the sixth floor of The Museum Block — an abandoned university wing.
She's good with tech. She makes devices no one can understand, but they do work. If you try to take a pic inside the kiki fan club office, your camera app will be replaced by DOOM 2.
Sometimes she tries to explain how her devices work, but no one can understand what she says.
Her hobby is injuring herself with acupuncture needles that give all the pain and none the damage. She likes to insert needles from the back between her ribs so they touch lungs, and then jump down landing on her chest.1 -
If I code 10 to 1 or 2 I can have good sleep..but in any case if I sleep eaely before 1 then code snippet and bugs come in dreams.........
..
Even if I sleep early when I'm too tired.. -
Sometimes, all you have to do is to yell “BACKSHIT!” and moonwalk into the sunset peppering first aid kits around.
— MTV life assistant -
umm... all of my dreams are weird. and are a selection of random things that happened. the only two weird things that were in my dreams:
1. (long ago) NPM logo on a tablet-smartwatch hybrid in a dream that isn't related to programming
2. (recently) a level 1 dude in some 8-bitish game trying to get into a cathedral which is supposed to be entered late in the game, only to get his ass kicked by Grim Reaper and a Sims 3 notification popping up about the death of that dude. -
My dreams are getting so weird i'm keeping a dream journal now.
If only I could draw/3D model/remember things a while.1 -
Rihanna changed her name to “Watermona” to become some kind of water access advocate for Africa that looks like Ramona Flowers2
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Azure DevOps Bash script task hangs for no reason. This will be in my dreams tonight.
(That and I spilled water all over my trousers in the office today) -
DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM
1 -
Bam Margera and Macaulay Culkin levitate and rapidly stomp-kick a poor girl that spilled her beer over a ramp2
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Themes:
- lost glory that was there before amnesia/in hipster times, has to be reassembled again, but it might no longer have anything in common with me
- luxury escape location that is mine but also isn’t
- a workplace where I kinda don’t work but where I’m welcome still, with a desk reserved for me
- awful, uncomfortable, depersonalizing and dirty new world that I don’t know why I should attend if I can leave right now and nothing will change -
Collage is like bad job with cool coworkers. You have to do some things what you don't want to do and dream about what you and your friends really would love to do instead.
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