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*Now that's what I call a Hacker*
MOTHER OF ALL AUTOMATIONS
This seems a long post. but you will definitely +1 the post after reading this.
xxx: OK, so, our build engineer has left for another company. The dude was literally living inside the terminal. You know, that type of a guy who loves Vim, creates diagrams in Dot and writes wiki-posts in Markdown... If something - anything - requires more than 90 seconds of his time, he writes a script to automate that.
xxx: So we're sitting here, looking through his, uhm, "legacy"
xxx: You're gonna love this
xxx: smack-my-bitch-up.sh - sends a text message "late at work" to his wife (apparently). Automatically picks reasons from an array of strings, randomly. Runs inside a cron-job. The job fires if there are active SSH-sessions on the server after 9pm with his login.
xxx: kumar-asshole.sh - scans the inbox for emails from "Kumar" (a DBA at our clients). Looks for keywords like "help", "trouble", "sorry" etc. If keywords are found - the script SSHes into the clients server and rolls back the staging database to the latest backup. Then sends a reply "no worries mate, be careful next time".
xxx: hangover.sh - another cron-job that is set to specific dates. Sends automated emails like "not feeling well/gonna work from home" etc. Adds a random "reason" from another predefined array of strings. Fires if there are no interactive sessions on the server at 8:45am.
xxx: (and the oscar goes to) fuckingcoffee.sh - this one waits exactly 17 seconds (!), then opens an SSH session to our coffee-machine (we had no frikin idea the coffee machine is on the network, runs linux and has SSHD up and running) and sends some weird gibberish to it. Looks binary. Turns out this thing starts brewing a mid-sized half-caf latte and waits another 24 (!) seconds before pouring it into a cup. The timing is exactly how long it takes to walk to the machine from the dudes desk.
xxx: holy sh*t I'm keeping those
Credit: http://bit.ly/1jcTuTT
The bash scripts weren't bogus, you can find his scripts on the this github URL:
https://github.com/narkoz/...53 -
Fuck today was weird.
Today I received almost half a million on my bank account. 😯
Someone changed the ancient cryptic billing system. My user account at work has id 32 in the database, and the dev referenced the size of the creditor id instead of the of the value of the ids itself, and they're u32 ints... So ALL the money moving through our platform was accidentally transferred to my associated bank account.
For all the unit tests we have, this bug tumbled right through.
And no one at finances thought a transfer that big, to a backend dev they know by name, was suspicious — with almost no money going to other creditors...
That worries me a bit. The fact that this shit can happen, even at high test coverage, just because someone mindlessly did a wrong autocomplete or something.
Of course I will send it back... after two weeks and a few hundred € of interest.12 -
Why am single 😂😂
On a date with a girl:
Her: Tell me what you do for a living
Me: I create my own stress and worries, sometimes these worries follow me in my sleep.
Her: Did they follow you here?
Me: Yes! Infact, I got it now. I think I forgot to install curl, that's why my API queries wouldn't work.
Her: Excuse me?
Me: I mean, I out of here, bug is fixed bit*h14 -
6 months ago I sold everything, quit my job, gave up my apartment and left the country with my 11kg backpack. I booked a one way ticket to South America. I wanted to travel, get lost but also finish up some personal projects and do a little tech books challenge I came up with. I learnt so much over the past half a year, it's crazy.
Not looking back. Projects paid off and it turns out that my dream company actually found me themselves without me even applying... and so still from South America I'm in final rounds of the interview! 🤗
All my worries about a gap in CV, no employment along with other problems I thought I was gonna have... It's all BS. So if anyone here is waiting for a sign. Well, this is it now. Go!
22 -
Sometimes I feel frontend development is like ancient magic:
Backend Dev: Oh no, I can't align this DIV properly.
FE Dev: No worries!
* Casts Flexius Boxius on the DIV *
* Div aligns slightly better *
BE Dev: But it's not centered!
FE Dev: No worries!
* Casts Marginis Automaticus! *
* Rolls natural 1 *
* Everything collapses *
* Website is on fire *
* Product owner cries *
FE Dev: No worries!
* Casts Flexius Boxius level 5 on the parent div *
* Everything looks beautiful *
* People are in awe *
FE Dev: You are welcome!
* Adjusts his robe and leaves *8 -
Boss: make this thing
Me: yeah no worries. Where is the spec?
Boss: We don't have enough one but we outsourced the design so call him
Designer: haven't started yet
Me: excellent
Boss: I'm going on holiday. I'll leave this to you.
Me: erm ok. I'm having a few problems getting stuff out of the designer though.
*2 weeks later and still no designs*
Boss: I'm back. Where is the progress?!
Me: indeed.
*1 week later i get half designs that sort of make sense*
Boss: hurry up!
*1 week later*
Me: designer you're busting my balls here
Designer: yeah lol
Me to boss: still having problems. No idea what I'm doing.
Boss: deal with it
*2 days later*
PM: we are demoing it to clients tomorrow
Me: brilliant. I'll become a magician then.
* Meeting goes well and no one notices the thing is a bit buggy*
*2 days later*
Me to boss and pm: you already know whats going on but I'll keep trying.
Boss: ok it's just a proof of concept anyway.
Designer: yeah here's the rest of the designs lol
*1 week later, the designs made no sense, no idea what they wanted but hey it's a proof of concept so I'll just do my best...*
*suddenly again, hey you have 1 week before we sell it. Lol. smashes a product together as fast as humanly possible, due to half designs and no time to do it right even html classes and CSS aren't right - didn't know things would be repeated at the time. No time to fix entire thing. Luckily just a proof of concept*
New senior developer: hey boss just said this is being sold tomorrow.
Me: wtf..It's a proof of concept and i was given longer...
New senior developer: no
Me: :(
Senior developer and all colleagues: it's full of bugs and doesn't work
Me: yes that will happen without specs, random tight deadlines, no designs that made sense and a total of about a week and a half to make an entire system for multiple user types to make applications, send messages, post jobs, handle all paperwork and move paperwork among different user types as they go through applications. I told everyone what was going on but i get no support...
*Silence*
Boss: wtf i gave you so long! All i know is my entire staff is working on a product that should be done ages ago
Me: ok, however i have said almost every day i need-
Boss: I'm not interested
*I finish my placement year and never get any promised work or the job offer*
Seems legit?16 -
Me(m) vs Apple(a)
m - hey apple!
a -
m - apple?
a - oh yeah, who are u?
m - umm, titan?
a - titan who?
m - titanlan- .. umm nevermind . hi , i am a developer :D
a - developer ? hah.. get out.
m - but wait, I want to develop apps for you! I have been developing android apps for last one year and i love mobile dev! wanna talk more on this ?
a - umm.. ugh ok. so you wanna develop apps?
m- yes!, i am doing great at java an-..
a- yeah wait. we don't have that in here. we use swift
m -Oh. no worries , the principles are the same i will watch some free youtube vids and have a plugin for studio or vsco-..
a- yeah wait you can't do that too.we don't have plugins
m - Really, no plugin? then where do people develop ios apps?
a- xcode
m - Oh , how stupid of me , an IDE of course. anyways i can simply install it in my windows or linux an-..
a - nope, you can't do that.
m - what? then where does it run?
a -macOS
m -Oh, then surely you might have some distro or-
a - nope, buy a mac. pass $3000
m- wha-? i just want to run your bloody IDE!
a- oh honey, your $3000 will be totally worth it, you will love it!
m- but i haven't even started making an app, leave alone publishing it.
a- oh, that will cost you another $100 . plus if you wanna test your apps, make sure it runs in our latest , fragile iphones otherwise we won't publish it. that will cost another $1500
m- what? but I already have a fine , high tech laptop and a smartphone!
a- yeah you can dump that
FML. how the fuck is apple living and thriving? lots of selfish motives and greeds i guess? because i don't see a single place where they are using the word "free" or "cheap" .26 -
So me and my wife offered a friend to build and host a website for him for free for the first year when he was starting his business. We all agreed and wife started to build it.
The only thing that she had left was getting pictures and texts from him that would be on the site. That was 10 month ago.
And Today - it was suddenly SUPER IMPORTANT to get the site up because he has left alot of Business cards at a conference.
Wife - who is studying answered that she can fix it in a few weeks because she does'nt simply have time.
The dude sent this now:
"Ok no worries, I have solved it myself"
So I checked:
The domain he bought, is just a redirect to "randomshit.wixsite.com"18 -
KISS.
Keep it simple, stupid.
At the beginning the project is nothing but an idea. If you get it off the ground, that's already a huge success. Rich features and code quality should be the last of your worries in this case.
Throw out any secondary functionality out the window from day 0. Make it work, then add flowers and shit (note to self: need to make way for flowers and shit).
Nevertheless code quality is an important factor, if you can afford it. The top important things I outline in any new non-trivial project:
1. Spend 1-2 days bootstrapping it for best fit to the task, and well designed security, mocking, testing and extensibility.
2. Choose a stack that you'll most likely find good cheap devs for, in that region where you'll look in, but also a stack that will allow you to spend most of your time writing software rather than learning to code in it.
3. Talk to peers. Listen when they tell that your idea is stupid. Listen to why it's stupid, re-assess, because it most probably is stupid in this case.
4. Give yourself a good pep talk every morning, convincing you that the choices you've made starting this project are the right ones and that they'll bring you to success. Because if you started such a project already, the most efficient way to kill it is to doubt your core decisions.
Once it's working badly and with a ton of bugs, you've already succeeded in actually making it work, and then you can tackle the bugs and improvements.
Some dev is going to hate you for creating something horrific, but that horrific thing will work, and it's what will give another developer a maintenance job. Which is FAR, far more than most would get by focusing on quality and features from day 0.9 -
We have no more time for all this Agile stuff!
Half of our developers might have been injured when we built the Great Wall of China, but no worries, we've listened to your complaints about feeling overworked!
You can take 3 extra days off this year. Meanwhile, we're starting the next project.
We're building some pyramids.
What? You want Scrum and sprints? Sure, do sprints, whatever helps us build those pyramids!
Requirements? Refinements? What requirements are there to refine?
We require a giant pyramid.
For v1, you can build the foundation out of wet mud. It must be 500 meters. Wide, or high, we're not sure yet, we'll get back to you on that. It must have less than 4 sides, but certainly more than 3.
The Frontend team has already built a part of the entrance using 60 semi trucks filled with papier-mâché, pipe cleaners and glitter.
Now go build already!20 -
I applied to a backend position that requested one of the following technologies: PHP, Java or .NET ( I work on .net btw)
So far so good, the hr recruiter schedules a talk and ask a lot of standard questions like what is your greatest accomplishment, what is good code and so on.
After what seemed to be about an hour of questioning she then tells me that I am to take a technical test from backend javascript. I pause for a second and I specifically tell her, lady, the ad said .NET, Java or PHP, wtf? And she tells me, no worries, we will train you. You can imagine that I completely blew the technical interview to later get an email that my knowledge (in javascript) is not sufficient for the position. Gg guys, good company values :))1 -
nephew: what's the meaning of word "Enterprise", particularly in computing context?
me: No worries about that. Once You endup in enterprise You will know
nephew: How do I know?
me: when bug in your software prevent at least 250 people from doing their job, congratz, You are in Enterprise! And You will know that instantaneously, trust me :)2 -
HR, why so stupid?
I'm currently living in Sweden, want to move to Austria (significant other is studying there, I'm finishing my studies over here)
Me: *Applies for a Junior Java Dev job via company's online platform*
HR1: We like your CV, be here for an interview in person in 5 days.
Me: That's expensive, can we do it via Skype? I'm still in Sweden.
HR1: How are you planning on working in Austria while living in Sweden?
Me: I'm not. I'll move to Austria in 2 months. That's when I'd like to start working with you.
Me: *wonders why they skipped that part in my CV/cover letter as it's clearly stated there*
HR1: ....
Me: Hello?
Me: Helloooo?
HR2: We're sorry to tell you that the position of Senior Database Engineer has been filled. May we use your CV for other potential openings at our company?
Me: No worries, I applied for Junior Java Dev anyways. You may use my CV for other openings.
HR2: Oh, sorry for the confusion. I just mistyped the job title.
Me: *WTF? That was a machine-generated answer. Your system filed my application in the wrong place. You didn't mistype shit.*
HR1: Oh good for you. We've suddenly found out we need a Junior Java Dev as well as a Senior Database Engineer. Do you have time for a Skype interview this afternoon?
Me: ....
HR1: Hello?
Me: ....
HR1: Tomorrow then?4 -
Me: *starts to get into electronics*
Me: *unplugs a few wires while building a project*
Me: Shit, actually, didn't want to unplug those. No worries.
Me: *instinctively reaches for the nonexistent Ctrl-Z*
Me: Oh, that's right. My actions have consequences in the real world.5 -
Recap: https://www.devrant.io/rants/878300
I was out Thursday at the Hospital. I'm what the doctors would call "Ill as fuck"
So, Friday I’m back in the office to the usual: "How was that appointment?"
I know people mean well when they ask this. So, I do the polite thing and tell them it went as well as it could.
Realistically it does't matter how well it went... They haven't cured Crohn's because I showed up to the appointment. They know I'm fucked already.
But, push it down, add it to the future aneurism.
I had to go through the usual resignation meetings with managers:
"We"re fucked now you're going"
"yep"
"we need to get a handle on how fucked"
"already done that for you, here"s a trello board, very fucked."
"we need to put a plan together to drop all the junior devs in the shit with the work you’ve been doing"
"You need about 4 devs, please refer to the previous trello board for your plan"
Meanwhile, me and Morpheus are in constant communication because all of this is like a Shakespearean comedy.
So, I overhear a conversation between a Junior Dev and the Solution Architect.
[SA] took over the project because he knows better than two tried and tested senior devs -_- (fuckwit).
JD: "It took me one and a half days to build it out"
SA: "Yeah, it must have taken me twice as long... It must be a problem with the project, you should just be able to check it out and run it."
JD: "I know, it has to be wrong"
All of this is about Morpheus' work of art, of an Ionic 3 hybrid app.
I fumed quietly at my desk because I've been ordered by the Stazi to be hands off.
Since Morpheus and me were pulled from the project [JD] and [JD2] were dropped into it to get it over the line.
It"s unfortunate and I was clear and honest with my advice to them: I personally would not take over the project because I"d be way out of my depth... Oh, and the App works, so uh, there's no work to do.
They have been constantly at our desks. Asking fuckdiculous questions about how to perform basic tasks. So they can get Morpheus" frigging masterpiece to the user.
It"s like watching that touch up of jesus that got borked by an amateur. Shit I have google, it's like watching this happen: http://ti.me/NnNSAb
[JD] came to me Friday evening.
"I can’t get this to build to iOS or install on [Test Analyst]'s phone."
Me: "No worries brother, where are you stuck right now?"
[JD] describes the first steps with clear indication he hasn't googled his problem.
Life lesson: http://lmgtfy.com/?q=lmgtfy
Que an hour of me showing [JD] how to build an Ion3 project for iOS. Fuck it, your man's in a bind and he"s asked politely for help. I can show him quicker than he can read 3 sets of docos.
I took him through 'ionic cordova build ios', the archive and release processes in XCode 9, then the apk bundling process for droid. Finally we have an MAM so the upload process for that too.
All the while cleaning up his AppIDs, Profiles, deployment attempts.
Damn they were a mess.
I did this with a smile on my face, not because I could say "I told you so"... But. because when any developer asks you how to do something. If you know how to do it, you should always be happy to learn them some new tricks!
Dude's alright, he's been dropped in the shit. Now I know how badly so I'll help him learn things that are useful to his role, but aren't project specific.
As a plausi-senior dev (I'll tell you about that later); it's my job to make sure my team have what they need to go home smiling!
I’m not a hateful fucker, the guy asked me an honest question so I am happy to give him the honest answer.
I took him through it a few times and explained a few best practices. Most were how to do his AppID and ProvProfile set up. Good lad, took it all on board.
However! In his frustration, he pointed the finger at Morpheus' "David" (ref: Michelangelo).
He miraculously morphed into a shiny colourful parrot and fed me SA's line:
"you should just be able to build from a clean clone"
My response was calm and clear:
"You can, it took me 20 minutes on Thursday evening. I was bored and curios, so I wanted to validate Morpheus' work. Here it is on my iOS device and my Android device. It would have taken me 5 if my laptop wasn’t so horrifically out of date."
I validated Morpheus' work so I have evidence, I trust that brilliant bastard.
I just need to be able to prove it's good.
[JD] took this on board.
Maybe listening to two tried and trusted senior devs is better than listening to a headstrong Solution Architect.
When JD left for the weekend I was working a late one (https://www.devrant.io/rants/874765).
His sign off was beautiful.
"I think I can happily admit defeat on this one, it can wait until Monday."
To which I replied: "no worries brother, if you need a hand give me a shout."
Rule 1: Don't be a cunt.
Rule 2: If someone needs help and you can give it: Give it!
Rule 3: Don't interrupt James' cigarette time.
Rule 4: goto Rule 3.4 -
The deeper I go down the infosec rabbit hole, the more I worry about my doctors still using Windows XP. Why would you save sensitive patient info in those....shoe boxes?
4 -
At my next job interview. "So, do you have your lpic or redhat certification in vigor?"
Me. "Better. I have these, motherfucker."
(They arrive a few days ago, but I couldn't show them till now. If you're living outside US and worries about if you can get your stickers, be sure you will. They made all their way to Spain, and had no trouble to receive them. Be patient, and eventually they'll arrive safely and beautiful.)
2 -
Interview for a new job
Team leader: well yes, we have this webapp with Angular, it's a bit convoluted so we need help working on it
Me: sounds good enough, I have no experience with Angular though, I'll need to learn on the road
Team leader: no worries :)
A couple of weeks later, after joining the team
Me: wait a moment, that's not Angular you got there. That's AngularJS, it's like 10 years old
Team leader: 😊
Bruh11 -
Rain monitoring/alert api's/services/websites/apps.
Why the fuck are those fuckers (in my case) nearly always right when I couldn't care less and very fucking wrong when I couldn't care more?
Today, morning before leaving:
Nah mate you're good for the next x minutes (more than enough time for me to bike to the station and get on the train).
Reality: suddenly getting two gallons of water a second on me in the form of rain, arrived completely soaked and headphones broke.
Before biking home from the station;
*its raining hard as hell*
Rain alert/monitoring app/radar thingy: nah mate no worries, no rain last half hour and you're good for another half hour!
Reality: arrived home soaked a-fucking-gain.
So motherfucking annoying and frustrating. And yes, I do have an umbrella and such but I hate carrying that stuff around when 'not needed'.5 -
Real-time physics calculation of +250000 blocks on AMD Athlon.
No worries boys, I had fire extinguisher.4 -
In my office they forced us to use Darwin Box. We need to login and click on clock in once we come to office. Fucking irritated. Who the hell remembers to clock in.
I wrote a simple Python code to clock in and made it as launched jobs.
Automatic clock in. *No Worries* 😅
#ProudToBeDev
Here is github:: https://github.com/Gowtham95india/...5 -
DevRant is a wonderful community, and the last thing any of us would want it to lose it. I think DR should have ads. To think that DevRant grew so fast and large, yet they haven't implemented ads shows just how awesome these guys are. But, it worries me to think that it's only supported by merch and people paying for collab and avatar stuffs scares me. Just a small ad at the bottom of the screen, I'm sure most of us wouldn't mind, and if it helps these humble and amazing people who created DevRant, I would be more than happy.17
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When client requesting something, it has to be done ASAP.
But when i ask about the payment...
I must sign some documents declaring the job was done
The documents then must be sent to manager
The manager must create another document to be sent to finance division
The finance sent that thing to director to sign the damn document so finance can make a payment
Oh shit the first document before i start the project went missing, i have no idea why they need that
Some weeks has been passed till today
Cant find the document
Recreate the document
I must sign it back but they said no worries, we can advance to next step so i can get paid today
Manager creates a document
Manager sent that document into finance
Oh shit the financial division is having some seminar, its friday so it will be processed on monday
WTF10 -
My SO got a promotion, and with it he's going to be out of town about every other week.
I told him I'm excited for him, that even though I'll miss him it's a sacrifice I'm happy and willing to make because it's so good for his career, and our future. I don't want him to distracted during his work trips about worries about my unhappiness.
But I miss him and this is so hard actually 😔10 -
"Hey boss, could you look over this reply to this support case before I send it? I just want to clarify a couple of things first."
"I haven't got the time to look over support case replies - you need to be proactive in deciding what's right, and then just sending them on."
"Ok, no worries."
5 minutes later...
"What the hell have you written on this support case? This isn't correct at all. Now they're going to be really confused. You've completely contradicted what I told them yesterday on the phone."2 -
So as all of you web developers know. If you are stepping into the world of web development you stepping into a world of unlimited possibilities, opportunities and adventure.
The flip side is that you step into a world of unlimited choices, tools, best practices, tutorials etc.
Since even for a veteran programmer, this is a little overwhelming, I'd like to take the opportunity to ask you guys for advice.
I know that 'there is no best' and that everything 'depends on what you want to achieve'. So how about just say the pro's and cons or when to use and when not to use. Or why you prefer one over another. Everything is allowed! :D
Maybe it will help others too. Start a nice, professional discussion:)
These are the parts I'd like advice about:
- frontend: what frameworks, libraries
- backend: language, framework, good practice
- server: OS, proxy (nginx, Apache, passenger), extra tips (like don't use root user)
- extras: git, GitHub, docker, anything
Thanks in advance everyone willing to help!:)
Also, if you only know frontend or backend. No worries, just tell me about your specialism!6 -
Quick rant!!
Deadline in 2 days, working with a team.
Me: yo ! , How's the xyz feature? Is it working now?
Teammate: yah, made it work yesterday.
Me: epic! Can you present it to me?
Teammate: wtf, it's not working today!!
Me: no worries, you can sort it out!
Teammate: the latest release you worked on doesn't work properly.
Me: yah, merged code fucked up, I'm fixing that, I'll push a fix today.
And the cycle continues... -
ME: Here's an endpoint to get all the textual info about the entity. And this one fine endpoint is to fetch entity's files
FrontEnd: This is no good. I need all entity info in a single JSON
ME: but files could be quite heavy, are you sure you wan...
FE: Yes, Just give me all the info in a single JSON
ME: okay... I hope you know what you're doing..
ME: <implemented as requested>
ME: <opens a webpage with 2 files attached>
Browser: <takes 30 seconds to open a page and downloads 30MB of data in the JSON>
ME: As mentioned before, your approach is a performance killer
FE: No worries, we'll fix that in the next version. First let's see if anyone will be using this feature at all - maybe it's not even worth working on
ME: <thinking> I know I would NOT be using an app if it takes over half a minute to open up a chat channel. FFS I wouldn't even be using Slack if it took 30 seconds to open some other conversation, because for some reason it wanted to fetch all the uploaded files along with all the messages each time a channel is clicked on.....
ME: <thinking> this project is doomed :(11 -
my dad's excavating some land so he can build a house, and he found a HDD buried out in the middle of fucking nowhere (50+ miles from nearest town in the middle of 10-house "village") -- no case, no wrap, just the drive. It works, but when we read it it was zeroed save for a few bad sectors that didn't take. It also makes a horrible cricket-like noise (https://picosong.com/w8qYn but much louder in reality, shitty phone mic) and it worries me.12
-
*in Sprint planning listening to my PM creating tasks*
PM (to Team): So this will be an MVP we can expand on in the future. Do let me know upfront if any tasks should not be in the Sprint.
Team Manager (to PM): Let's see... Yeah I think you've nailed it... Good.
Developer (to Team): Guys, I see the task for the frontend team to integrate machine learning doesn't have any details.
PM (to Developer): Ooh machine learning! Good catch!
PM (to Team Manager): This was one of the tasks we really needed this quarter, will we still be on track?
Team Manager (to PM): Yeah no worries we'll add it as part of the MVP design in Confluence.
PM: Okay assigning the task now. *Assigns to Developer*
*Team Manager goes on 1 month vacation*
Me (thinking to myself): Wtf3 -
Okay, I'm interning at a government institution & boy let me just tell you... mmmh... A FUCKING MESS!
So I'm tasked with developing a HR system that the whole company should eventually use. I tell them I'm not familiar with the open source technologies they'd like me to use, they tell me no worries, you can develop a prototype with a tech stack that you're familiar with. Also, they tell me that they don't quite have the requirements from HR so what I can do for my prototype is just develop something "general" that works according to their "idea".
Being the good intern I am, I develop quite a good functioning prototype & present it to the team who then present it to the managers.
Finally we're all called in for a final meeting with the managers & HR, and guess what? The requirements for the system are different. Almost 90% of the features we built into the prototype need to change. Also, the system must use open source technologies. The managers promise to send a detailed requirements specification document, with sample data. I think this is a great idea as there's still a lot I don't understand. I expected this to happen, so I soon start to redesign afresh, this time trying as hard as possible to consider open source technologies within my plans.
But noooo... My team wants me to "finish" the system!
"Finish" what system, I ask? That was a prototype!
"Just tweak the functionality you built to meet the new requirements".
WTF!
We don't even have the actual requirements specification document, so I'll still be coding blindly. Also, the whole system needs to be re-built using open source technology!
Instead of pushing me to develop a system blindly, with no requirements, how about you push HR to tell you exactly what they need and how it should work first!?
I'm honestly exhausted with the false sense of urgency from my team!!8 -
So, 9months ago my scrum master came to me and asked me to spearhead a "little" API... 2months work, no worries... I started the analysis and quickly discovered that that estimation was grossly understimated...
I convinced them that it was not 3 months but 4. I alerted to the design mistakes that were made, I pushed changes and made sure the entire project worked, was stable and the best it could be... 4 months passed, target proposition donne... Several change requests since then and we have been implementing braindead CR after CR for 5 months... Most CRs came from design issued I raised but we're ignored at the time just to come back and bite them on the ass...
Horrible design, bad documentation, amateur requirements analysis... However, delivered successfully with great acceptance...
What was my reward? They rearranged my team, removing virtually every good performer.
Never did I receive a "good work" or a "thank you"... I don't want one, I am just doing my job... However can you please not fuck me in the ass!? I now have 2 projects to spearhead at the same time and virtually no team... I can only handle so much!!!
Some good news? Ok, just announced I'm the project owner of a new project, that we will take advantage and make a 2 in one.... Great! Some more work for my lap! Thank you for the workload raise!... Ok, timewise? One month! And I still don't if that includes implementation....
TL DR; did my job, got fucked with more work...
Sorry for the vent, just wandering if I should try and not do my job...2 -
Doing e-learning for a job
One of the examples provided:
"You could be late for work (fail to meet your objective of being on time) because you're hit by a car whilst crossing the road"
Are you fucking kidding me, I think being late to work would be the least of my worries. Fuck corporate bullshit.14 -
Working on photo contest site, no design, no specification. 2 weeks until deadline.
CEO: Deadline is one week earlier, and client wants to have video uploads and automatic facebook share too.
Me: We don't even have a contract and design to work with yet.
CEO: No worries, the contract will be signed by the time you finished the website.
Site done in 1 week, including weekend days and overtime. Production on client's server as asked by CEO.
3 weeks later...
Me: So van you pay the overtime I worked?
CEO: Sorry client not payed and says they don't like the end product. I can't afford to pay you overtime.
2 days later.
CEO: The online department is lossy so you have to work harder in the next month, we have 3 sites to be done.
Me: Do we have the contracts?
CEO: No worries...4 -
Most painful code error you've made?
More than I probably care to count.
One in particular where I was asked to integrate our code and converted the wrong value..ex
The correct code was supposed to be ...
var serviceBusMessage = new Message() {ID = dto.InvoiceId ...}
but I wrote ..
var serviceBusMessage = new Message() {ID = dto.OrderId ...}
At the time of the message bus event, the dto.OrderId is zero (it's set after a successful credit card transaction in another process)
Because of a 'true up' job that occurs at EOD, the issue went unnoticed for weeks. One day the credit card system went down and thousands of invoices needed to be re-processed, but seemed to be 'stuck', and 'John' was tasked to investigate, found the issue, and traced back to the code changes.
John: "There is a bug in the event bus, looks like you used the wrong key and all the keys are zero."
Me: "Oh crap, I made that change weeks ago. No one noticed?"
John: "Nah, its not a big deal. The true-up job cleans up anything we missed and in the rare event the credit card system goes down, like now. No worries, I can fix the data and the code."
<about an hour later I'm called into a meeting>
Mgr1: "We're following up on the credit card outage earlier. You made the code changes that prevented the cards from reprocessing?"
Me: "Yes, it was my screw up."
Mgr1: "Why wasn't there a code review? It should have caught this mistake."
Mgr2: "All code that is deployed is reviewed. 'Tom' performed the review."
Mgr1: "Tom, why didn't you catch that mistake."
Tom: "I don't know, that code is over 5 years old written by someone else. I assumed it was correct."
Mgr1: "Aren't there unit tests? Integration tests?"
Tom: "Oh yea, and passed them all. In the scenario, the original developers probably never thought the wrong ID would be passed."
Mgr1: "What are you going to do so this never happens again?"
Tom: "Its an easy addition to the tests. Should only take 5 minutes."
Mgr1: "No, what are *you* going to do so this never happens again?"
Me: "It was my mistake, I need to do a better job in paying attention. I knew what value was supposed to passed, but I screwed up."
Mgr2: "No harm no foul. We didn't lose any money and no customer was negativity affected. Credit card system may go down once, or twice a year? Nothing to lose sleep over. Thanks guys."
A week later Mgr1 fires Tom.
I feel/felt like a total d-bag.
Talking to 'John' later about it, turns out Tom's attention to detail and 'passion' was lacking in other areas. Understandable since he has 2 kids + one with special-needs, and in the middle of a divorce, taking most/all of his vacation+sick time (which 'Mgr1' dislikes people taking more than a few days off, that's another story) and 'Mgr1' didn't like Tom's lack of work ethic (felt he needed to leave his problems at home). The outage and the 'lack of due diligence' was the last straw.1 -
So I'm at that age of arranged marriage process. It's kinda like dating but even more complicated with more if conditions on religion, caste, region, age and impressions of a third person who may be a mutual relative or acquaintance. And yeah, you have to engage or marry before any kind of intimacy.
Finding a girl of same religion, caste and region is hard enough, ( not a matter for me personally, but it's a factor for families to go along ). I was lucky enough to find this pretty nice girl that seems be the best match I have received in the matrimony site so far.
She's also a programmer which is awesome and together we could also explore the earth as a Digital Nomad if she's also into that.
Here's the deal though, my father is not very keen on next steps in making this partnership ( guys parent calling girls family to know things better ) because apparently she did higher education abroad and works abroad, and I'm not that qualified in terms of education. And on top of that, he worries I'll move abroad leaving everything back at home.
I suppose that's his insecurity showing up.
He doesn't realize working in IT is the most flexible job as proved in 2020 and it's only going to get better in the coming years. We could work from anywhere with the right remote company.
Anyhow, the girl's family found out my number and reached out to me directly. I'm pretty impressed honestly.
I had left little traces on the internet for potential families to find more info about me if they choose to look me up! This was in a way a little filter of my own. Thanks to Google Analytics and Seach Console for helping me to track them XD
I just hope this works out and my father won't mess up my chance for me to get to know this girl better and potentially be with the life partner I dreamed of.
If this won't work out, I'm just gonna live alone rest of my life. The criterias and conditions set by boomers for arranged marriage are very disgusting for my modern mindset.15 -
Another Developer: bro, shit hit the fan. The x web service is throwing some error. Can you take a look please. I want to go home. I'm tired.
Me: Yea sure bro no worries.
Another Developer: I go pee, after that I will delegate the ticket to you.
(Another Developer goes to the washroom)
Me: (04:59 PM) Oh time to pack-up and get the fuck out of here
Me: (05:08 PM) Receive a message on Viber from Another Developer. It reads "Fuck you, I'm going to rub my balls on your desk"3 -
Biggest hurdle I have overcome is <b>myself</b>.
All my expectations, worries, fears, and doubts definitely caused major hurdles I had to crash through, trip and fall into, or they downright exploded into balls of fire as I would stand dumbfounded and burned by flames of regret.
Learning I was the blocker to greater achievement, success and ultimately happiness was a very hard lesson for me to learn, and a lesson and discipline that I still battle with today.
It is difficult to climb the seven story mountain of madness with heavy burdens, plodding with little progress.
Free the weight, and the natural warm air currents will lift high the spirit, and the body will follow.
"Angels fly because they take themselves lightly" ~GKC1 -
Everybody is criticizing Microsoft for leaving too much legacy code in Windows, etc., but let me tell you that I prefer 100% that and have lifetime backward compatibility than having to deal with Google bullshit.
Google sucks ass.
It's one of the most dev unfriendly company on this planet (along with Facebook).
You can't fucking change BASIC stuff in Android SDK every fucking version.
You just can't!
You can't use a system of "PERMISSIONS" each developer has to set in its application and each user has to accept during the installation, that a few versions later become USELESS... because "Hmmm… no, It's not enough, let's make a new privileged permission that makes the old one fucking worthless".
YOU FUCKING, TOXIC, BASTARDS.
It's my app, my code, my device, my fucking conditions. If I want to install viruses on my device, I should be able to do it.
I shouldn't have to call fucking Sundar fucking Pichai fucking CEO of fucking GOOGLE.
USERS != BABIES.
DEVS != CRIMINALS
We are the reason you have a fucking job, fucking food on your fucking table.
I want a fucking GOD_MODE permission in the next SDK, assholes!
You can't REMOVE fucking "Android.OS.getSerial()" making it only for system apps.
It's not sensible data… and if It's in your opinion, you've already created a "android.permission.READ_PHONE_STATE", so what else do you want, fucking asshole?
Right, you want to introduce "android.permission.READ_PRIVILIGED_PHONE_STATE" to make obsolete the other one, son of a bitch!
I don't fucking use you're garbage Google Play Store, no worries! I won't upload my app on your servers, bitch!
They've created a monopoly in the industrial space (PDAs) and they keep making fucking wrong decisions every single year.
My job is already stressful, why you can't just stop making it worse? fml8 -
Got a ticket saying we need our website's record creation wizard to have better validation. No worries, just some regex, right?
Sure, regex for name entry (with the usual white person assumptions about names), and fixing the fact that it's in-page popup doesn't close on save. Or save draft. Or delete.
And also you need to apply the name regex for the fields on this page to all the previous names that the user lists.
And there's that one issue where the address history message always shows no matter what.
Oh and make sure that if they choose to ignore those validation issues then the validation message is in the notes for the record.
And fix the thing where it saves as draft instead of as a normal record.
And and and and and...
Can we just talk about making it 1 problem per ticket? This sort of shit makes me look bad when it takes me a week to fix 1 ticket, when I'm usually a few-a-day kinda person5 -
Just finished a rant about rererereinstalling windows (sorry, in a ranty mood), and now I have another reason to rant. Not the 10 new and exciting bloatware apps. Again. Lovely. No, this rant is about Edge.
You know, the new browser Microsoft is soo excited about (or was when it came out)? Just found out that it won't connect to Googles links to download chrome (tried 4-5). Because, you know, I might need to develop something. Incredible. That's some pretty high level *insertSpecialWords* from the Microsoft Edge team. "uhhhhh so your Highness, sir customer destructinator sir, our browser isn't that great. Everyone is still using chrome."
"how about we stop them from downloading that freaking amazing browser. That should stump them."
"wonderful sir! Amazing. We'll implement that straight away."
>:(
There's even a try this list of "suggestions" to fix this "problem". Including:
> Make sure you've got the right web address.
And my personal favorite, is less subtle:
>search for what you want!
Umm, I did. And then you blocked me from doing the one thing that I would realistically use this browser for. Aaand after the windows 10 forced update debacle, I'm not feeling especially "friendly" towards windows' "suggestions".
No worries though. I installed Firefox (not blocked) just to install chrome. Great job Microsoft.
10/109 -
when your PM sets a meeting for 7pm, postpones until 10pm and says: "no worries, we can do this another day"
u took my FRIDAY, WOMAN!
-
So here's is the thing.
For some weird reason I decided to work at a VC funded startup. For 15k year,(I live in a really poor country).
So, let me describe the hell I'm in now, and if for some good grace you happen to be hiring, please consider saving me from the horror that's ahead.
Company got funded 5 months ago, main owners are, an economist and a civil engineer with no programming habilities whatsoever.
They took 1 month to assemble "a killer team", with no hiring expertise they handpicked a CTO that came in 1 month later and took a month of vacation in his first month of work.
He didn't do any specification of the system that needs to be built.
The 2 naive owners hired the rest of this "killer team".
The team is good, but have no appreciation of planning.
They've built and rebuilt the backend system twice, once in graphql and the second with plain http (is not real rest, just a http api), in front of, guess what a mongo database.
This mongo DB is not only one, but 7, because we have 7 microservices, and each has its own database.
After some time, they decided to fire their CTO, and hire one more programmer(that's me), because the CTO wasn't doing anything.
The app has 3 parts, the app per se, a business version, and a help desk, guess what the helpdesk just appeared last week on the radar.
Long story short, we have one month to deliver what couldn't be built in 5.
When I decided to work for these people, I did not imagine the kind of clusterfuck that I was getting into.
It took me 1 month to realize the whole situation, now, I really would like to see some help from the deities of any religion, not for the project, that project is doomed.
It's how I'll pay the bills after that clusterfuck collapses that worries me.
Now in the startup no one is talking about how stupid the whole situation is. Or how far back we are. And at this point there's very little that could be done about it, I have a feeling that it could still be accomplished, but it's fading day after day.
I will do my best to live the best of this experience, and do as the musicians in the Titanic and keep playing the music even after knowing the Titanic is sinking.4 -
Got my first legit side-gig as a developer (like had to write an SOW and everything): my kids' pediatrician is amazing, but shes switching to a concierge practice, meaning she wont take any insurance, and shes going from about 1500 patients down to about 200. I already pay my mortgage-worth in insurance on a monthly basis, so we were prepared to say adios to her. At my daughter's last appointment, she pulled me aside and said "what can we do to keep you guys as patients?" and i somewhat jokingly suggested "I dunno, need any websites written?"
As a matter of fact, she did: she just fired her practice's web developer, who gave her a shitty wordpress site and fought like hell to avoid any further maintenance or updates for her. She hates the site's current layout (no surprise there) so she is basically giving me full control over a rewrite.
No user logins, no worries about compliance with PII or any of that. Literally just turning a brochure wordpress site into an angular app, hosting it on her own server and eventually building an admin page where she can change the banner text and upload new images.
And my kids will get free, top-notch health care.1 -
So.. my baby girl have had high feber for some days so that today we took a trip to the hospital to get it checked up (no worries, she's fine). But while there i notise that their computersystems had Comic Sans as font. I don't know but that didnt really seem .. professional ?
Tried to take a Picture and got yelled at by a nurse. And later by my wife. Apparently i was the only one who saw joy in this..9 -
Saturday 9.00 AM. I was sleeping, my colleague (on holiday) sent me a text: "We got a problem on our system, probably we ran out of space". I checked the log and found out that several cron jobs failed due to not enough space on the disk. I started deleting some unnecessary logs (we're paranoid) and ended up to squeeze the vm like a lemon to save some space. Sent an email to the sysadmin, "We got to add more space ASAP, users are getting 500 errror for almost everything". Silence. I thought to myself: "Until monday we're safe..". I did a df (96%) and sent a screen to the sysadmin, just to be sure that we understood each other. Finally monday comes, nobody worries about the issue. At noon I literally takled the guy of IT dept. "Yeah, we read your email. I think the sysadmin didn't take you seriously". "Why? Which part of 'we're running out of space' isn't serious?!!!". "He just told me that we have unlimited space on that vm". Unlimited space...sure.... "Right.....the disk is at 96%, buuuuut if he said so No news to worry. Don't call me if everything burns. Have a good day!!!"4
-
My co-worker pointing out there is a problem with my code that isn't implemented 100% yet. Hinting she wanted me to finish it over the weekend.
Yeah FMDL. -
We have a new hire, and he doesn't know much so he is receptive when given feedback on better ways to handle a situation...Or at least, he appears that way. Until the next time and he didn't listen at all.
Today I'm working on the front end to match his API calls. I ask him about a list of options for one of the fields, as he didn't provide that info initially. No worries, there was a lot, easy to miss. He responds with a list of ~100 options, which he copied and pasted from, I'm assuming, their documentation. I tell him that's too many options to hard code, as there is an easy chance to have an error or for there to be one added or deleted, and ask if there is an API endpoint to get the list.
He then asks if I need the key and value, or just key. I tell him if he needs the value(human readable) then he can send me just the value, otherwise both. He says he just needs the key, so I let him know that I need both then, as the value is human readable. He says okay.
He proceeds to make the endpoint, I test it. Then I look at the code he wrote. Not only did he not send me both, he just sent the keys, but he hard coded all 100 keys as opposed to making the call to the external API.3 -
Nothing makes me happier than listening to my neighbor's disgusting banda music playing as loud as it can.
No worries tho, the cops will be here in about 20 mins (it usually is 20) one would have expected that after getting the cops called on you for 3 times already you would get the message:
No homeslice. If i want to listen to that cantina piece of shit music on my fucking friday nights I will make sure to let u know :) but I actually have class so no thank you.
This is why Trump hates us (Mexicans) -
Talking with manager about C++ ...
ME: ... and those are the main differences when coming from C03 to C17.
MGR: OK. I think I got it... are these changes those kind of changes that when we know them we can work in any industry if they use C++?
ME: No they are not, sorry. They are like basic enablers to even start considering entering some industries. What you mean are standards. AUTOSAR standard for example is for automotive industry.
The standard requires some level of C++ standard competency.
MGR: Are these standards like plugins for C++...
ME: ? ... no. They specify rules and architecture, conventions and such.
MGR: ... aah. Architecture, I know that word. So in fact they are plugins....like...like...Eclipse IDE has architecture and it can have plugins....right ? ... and you just plugin that AUTOSAR standard to C++ language.
ME: I think you mixing stuff up on multiple levels here. I think we are not ready to talk C++ competency as a strategic decision yet... lets get some basics down first and discuss this stuff in one month.
MGR: ... ?..but, but I mean it can't be that hard. I think I almost got the gist. I just misunderstood at some point.
ME: Sure, sure. No worries...you almost had it *with deep sarcasm*.5 -
Hey everybody been a while but I have a rant. Swift fucking swift and IOS dev. Okay so been learning swift for some frontend casual work, no worries they are lending me a mac to work in.
Now comes the rant part IOS is fine to work in I dont have any qualms about platform but.. FOR THE LOVE OF COMMON FUCKING SENSE GET SOME FUCKING CONSISTENCY.
You have made swift statically typed language to supposedly make developing more consistant and better fine no worries i dont like static typed languages cause they are unnecessary but fine. then you go NAH FUCK IT EVERYTHING IN A MODULE IS IN GLOBAL SCOPE, FUCK IMPORT STATEMENTS, FUCK MAINTAINABILITY AND FUCK YOU FOR ASKING.6 -
As the saying goes "beggars can't be choosers" and I need to get a job.
I got approached by a recruiter in LinkedIn who had attached a PDF brochure.
It seems OKish, but the only part that worries me is "step 3" of recruitment process:
"Invitation to France and have a face-to-face technical interview and meet the team."
Will I be out of bounds if I ask the technical interview (if I ever make it that far) take place into Skype?
There are some savings, but going to France (somewhere between Cannes and Nice in summer period!!!) just for an interview that I might fail is a big gambit for me.8 -
User A: We need to do some check on our data. So you need to add in a new function for this, we can't use your system otherwise.
Me: Ok then.
Spends 2 days or so to get it working
Me: So this is the function we'll add. Can you confirm that its ok?
User A: Ohh...but now I'm not too sure about this. Let me confirm with my team lead on this.
User A: I just checked. Good news,we don't really need that function now. I think we can use it with the current one anyway haha. And I just confirmed this so no worries.
So I just wasted my time then. Great.3 -
When Everybody Is Digging for Gold, It’s Good To Be in the Pick and Shovel Business
- ai is just another squeeze of money to cloud from our pockets, no matter what you do as long as you’re not selling/renting hardware or have high profit customers your product will die
I don’t believe in any ai product right now that can’t be self hosted and opensource and many of them are not.
I use mac, like 64GB m1 mac book pro so I can host load of things like llama, wizzard-lm, mistral, any yolo, whisper, gpt, fucking midjourney or other stable diffusion for me is no drama.
I’d say there is no consumer product for ai right now. OpenAI is scam given what we got from mistral.
We are very early in this new but old technology and my worries are that we are not there yet. We will need to wait for another iteration that is approximately 10 years to achieve what we have in mind because current hardware is 10 years behind software.
We don’t have an affordable computing power to go for our dreams.
Sad but true.5 -
Day 1 of a new semester in college. Our 50 yr old H.O.D is a guest lecturer of this new subject called "Industrial Management" (why its included in the syllabus of CSE degree i wonder) . As there were only 6 students , the guy went on like a drunkard telling life lessons :
1) only 20% of the people in a company are only working. Rest 80% of them are just using sugar coated words at the right place ; doing politics and taking credits of the others .
2) those 80% getting benefits are usually the bosses (and in his example, the senior deans and H.O.Ds buttering the administrative dept and director ) and the hardworking 20% are the Juniors or the new joiners ( and in his example, the latest recruited ,honest teachers. Makes sense why we have shitty teachers :/ ). They altogether make sucesses to the company(although its just those 20%hardworkers doing the actual job) . But at the time of salary everybody gets the benfit.
3) Its always perfect to throw blames at senior or junior. (explaining how a parent complaining about the poor study environment to director is made to think that it's only the fault of his own child. blames going from director to dean to HOD to teachers to your own child's mistakes.)
4) Being your boss's favourite is super important. He gave example as : 2 teachers meets him with 100% results and 100% reviews. One of them is a known asshole with 0 knowledge, who makes jokes and sexist comments during the class, gives free attendence and question papers before the exam{therefore 100%reviews} . But he is dean's great ass-licker . The other one is honest hard-working teacher with real reviews and results. So he says he shows their combine results to the director along with his own buttering and ass licking, gets a hike himself and permit to give hije to one junior teacher. And who would it give hike to? The ass licking asshole, because that's how it works. What about the honest teacher?what reply would he get? Simply, appreciations and sugar coated words : "thank you for working so hard. But you did not do anything new. You were only hired to DO hardwork and give good results"
( and i was like fuck? Like seriously? Because that is something resonating with what i once heard in my internship :"yeah you are developing nice and all good, but that's what you are expected to do. You were only hired to achieve results, and you did nothing new". So that's what we are missing? Ass licking?-_- )
5) He believed its important to "look working" than being "actually working" . Quoting an example from his days as a dev, he told a story about how he once worked on a project with deadline of 1 month . He was young and worked hard and in 2 days completed the complete project and accidentally reported success to boss instead of his seniors. The boss simply congratulated his team(seniors and him) and assigned them another project. Later that day , he got an ass-wipe scolding from his seniors that if he had kept his mouth shut, they would have simply watched movies and relax for next 15 days, and submit the project during the salary time to gain bonus attention.
He even gave his short mantra or principle for such situation "kaam ki fickar kar, fickar ka zickar kar, par kaam mat kar " (get worried and tensed about the work. Display your tention and worries to the world (esp bosses) . But don't work.)
And there were many other short stories like that.
Mann, i was about to shout " you corrupt asshole ", but one thing He just told us about the importance of being in boss's good books made me stop ( nd he is a fucking HOD, senior to teachers)
But hell he told some relatable truths. Make me sad about the job life.
Bloody Office politics :| -
!rant but kinda.
!dev but also dev
Hello, my name is ***** and I already had a few Old Fashions🥃
I've been chasing a big career and success since i was about 12.. the first 8 years of my career I did the same.
for the last two years i decided to slow down, I'm still keeping up with stuff and do a good job but I took a break from wanting to being the next Wozniak.
Im much happier and more relaxes now but I'm at a point where i really wanna do, be and achieve more..
My #1 goal in life is to build a family, having a wife and a few kids. (first gotta be able to talk to women though:/)
i have a very strong desire to have an impact on the world and society to build a life in which at least my (non existing) family could be happy and without worries. but i've no fucking clue how to achieve that. how to have an impact. i don't see a way as a software engineer anymore..
i feel lonely and lost without any fucking perspectives..
i feel like i was better off when i was chasing the big money..
i know dev rant is not the place to do this but i can't talk to my family and i wanted to share my emotions. been alone for 3 months now and it's also about my dev career, that's how i justify to post this to our community here😅4 -
So my brother and I work in the same company, same dev team (pretty nice).
He's an intern and I'm a senior. But the task are very similar only that interns need monitoring and guidance.
He constantly worries because he thinks he knows nothing and is slow on getting things done.
I always tell him that it is perfectly normal to feel like that, he just need to learn and acquire experience and we all go through that at the beginning.
Can you share your experience and tell him something to encourage him so I can show him this post and he sees he's not alone?
And also he finally decides to join devRant 😊3 -
Sooooo... I've felt a bit lost during my years as a student and maybe this is a nice place to finally talk about it.
I've had my first programming experiences in school (back then it was delphi, a Pascal variant), then decided after graduating I want to study computer science. I've stuck with it and will finish my masters degree in a few months. (Took me a year longer than the university plans but will likely have a very good grade)
Since i have little programming experience and never coded anything useful (mostly study projects or simple programming tasks) I've always been struggling with depressions, worries of being not good enough and never finding a job etc pp, but in the last few months it got worse since I NEED to apply for jobs now as i graduate next may. I'd really like to improve and found some "learn how to code" websites but the progress seems still slow and meaningless when I compare myself to all those guys out there:
- those comparing several hardware/software pieces casually since they know all the (dis)advantages and specs off by heart
- those who have fierce discussions about languages, libraries, runtimes etc
- those who solve the problems in coding websites with 3 lines and incredibly mathematicsl proofs for why this shortcut works (fastest)
- basically the guys who discuss so many things i've never even heard of
I just feel so lost, useless and like i missed years of learning things everybody else just obviously knows now. Is there any way to catch up? I thought about trying to join a local Chaos Computer Club but they sound like they wouldn't be fond of a noob like me.6 -
This happened a few years ago. We started this new project that was estimated to take 3 devs around 5 months to complete. We had a meeting where the client, the project manager, me and two other devs were present. When the client asked if we were still on track to complete the project by the end of September, the PM just said “yeah we are totally on track, no worries”.
Me and the other devs looked us straight in the eyes and nonverbally agreed that this guy has to be sniffing glue or something. For context: it was August.
After the meeting we immediately raised our concerns with him and our boss. The deadline was shifted and a freelancer was hired to assist. The PM quit shortly after and a way more competent guy took over. But the damage was already done.
In the end we finished that project in February or March the following year. Client was still happy but this shit triggered a whole clusterfuck of a year. Other projects were lagging behind because of this and we had to push out project after project that had accumulated in our backlog. -
Ever since i joined my company, things are getting worse.
from small details like them abandoning team lunches to big ones like the fact no one or at least i didnt get any bonus this year.
I know for a fact bonuses were a thing before i joined and i was really looking forward to it...
And now by the end of the month we will recieve word about whether we are getting acquired or not...
After reading this rant one would think the company is getting bankrupt, and this worries me because this job was best i could ever ask for, i dont wanna abandon ship :/1 -
Monday morning we found out our main event queue hadn't processed since late Wednesday afternoon. Shit was hitting the fan and we were stumped. What had changed?!?. Why wasn't the queue processor running?!?
Turns out a server restart had killed the job (no worries there, surely?!) but turns out the job checked for a system flag on disk to stop it running multiple instance or in this case as the flag was still present any instance at all. Got to love the little things that really screw you over.6 -
!rant !dev
I was just on my way to work back from the University cafeteria when a guy in a black car - who I thought was moving the car out of a parking lot - stopped the car and asked if I had a second.
Naive me, thinking he might need directions or something decided to listen to him.
He looked older, around 60ish, with sunglasses on ( making it harder for me to read him).
He said that he had a stroke (or something) a few years ago and got damage to his brain, so that sometimes it can happen that he would faint. Therefore, he cannot go swimming unsupervised, and was asking if I would have the time to accompany him to the university lake, so that he could swim for an hour or so. He offered to pay me 40 bucks.
Me, being paranoid af, declined politely, saying I have to go to work ( which was actually true).
He goes on to say how he was a teacher, how he worked at the university before, how I look trustworthy, how I am the first person he asks today, and asked if he could have my number, so that he could call me sometime to supervise the swimming. I would just need to look out for him not to drown and if anything looks weird I should alarm the people working at the lake ( lookouts? not sure what they are called).
I kept declining politely and he backed off, letting me go without any fuzz.
Previously he also mentioned how some students are rich, others are poor, and how he would have done anything for 20 bucks back in the day. But also said that he accepts a no and won't bother me further.
He also mentioned he wouldn't lay a hand on me, that he is not a creep, since I could see his car and license plate, and if I gave him my number, I would also have his. That I shouldn't worry about anything, if I later decided to say no he would delete my number, and that he is not big on the technology and Internet so nothing would happen.
Uhh... well if he was genuine I'm sorry for him, but then you can just ask authorities at the beach to pay more attention to you, no?
Mentioning "all my worries" raised a red flag for me sort of.
Also, if you keep on fainting occasionally, even if you haven't fainted in 2 years, how are you allowed to drive? Or actually, why do you even drive then?
I don't know. The more I think about it, the more I think I should have taken a picture of the car or license plate.
And there are literal services for this kind of thing. Pretty sure you can get one of these if you are willing to pay even.
Jeez now I'm worried for the entire population of my university...9 -
Did anyone ever thought of just shutting down their systems, taking their bagpack and just straight away go on a break ?
No office phone calls!
No worries!
Just some quality you-tine.11 -
Anyone ever just get seriously discouraged about peoples view on how easy/difficult it is to code?
A client has requested that they want a system built so they can create surveys and send them to people via email all in one tool. Im not a good front end designer but I know how to develop it. So they hired a designer to send me screen mockups and I will develop them. Easy enough.
This is where the bullshit starts... The designer was supposed to send me the V1 designs last Friday so I could begin building. I told them that I could have a rough version of some pages (with placeholder text and whatnot) ready for the following Friday (tomorrow). However the designer didn't send me the designs until 5 minutes before we were all meeting yesterday. We were all going over the designs in the meeting and this is how the conversation went (roughly):
Client: Wow these designs are amazing, I cant wait to see what it looks like when it functions. Are we still going to have a demo version by Friday?
Me: Well seeing as I just got the designs today, Ill have to look them over and get back to you on a new timeline.
Designer: Yah sorry about the delay, designing can be tricky sometimes.
Client: No worries, I understand. However I want to stick to the same timeline and have the demo by Friday.
Me: Well as I said, Im only getting the designs now, this is the first time I'm seeing them so I'll have to look them over and re-evaluate.
Client: Yeah but the designs are done so it will be easy for you to code it by then. It's all right there in front of you. I need to run, excited for Friday! Bye!
Designer: Bye!
Me: ...........
-- I know its partially my fault for saying I could have a demo done by Friday assuming the designer would have it done on time but COME ON. I hate when people say something is easy when they have no idea what it entails or how to even do it.1 -
My Boss Abuses me, should I leave my job?
I overheard this tidbit on a bus recently. Okay I'm lying. But in the great spans of
time I've spent reading "dear annie" type articles, many involving how often my meth head step dads beat me while growing up, or in turn how often *I* beat me (oh yeah)..I've come across this in one form another, this, and other dumbfuck questions from the stuttering meek and halfhearted.
They say there are no dumb questions. Well, like that guy who smoked too much weed and
asked "what is the sound of one hand clapping?" (fap fap fap), there are in fact dumb questions.The world is overflowing with them, like a clogged shitter full of tacobell and glitter covered brown gutter wisdom. And it smells like roses, if roses smelled like shit.
Questions like "How do I make sure my cats don't feel lonely once I have my first child?"
I don't know, they're fucking cats. Did you even google this before asking?
Or
"How to make spaghetti?"
Really, is this question written by a bot?
"What is the best javascript framework in year x?"
All of them and none of them. Welcome to hell.
"Whats your favorite color?"
My answer: I'm not five years old any more. And obviously you are. Why are you on this site instead of eating crayons at daycare?
Yes indeed, this and many more dumbfuck questions await you and can be found on the preeminent quora, amongst other sites.
A place, which censored an eminently reasonable answer of mine (I was totally not being a shithead btw).
I responded in kind by removing a whole mess of long form answers of mine.
What I have learned from the experience is this: Humanity is greatly comprised of many people who, having no brains to speak of, wander aimlessly like beasts of the field, glass eyed and slack jawed, in search of a savior. But their savior came a long time ago, once, and many times before. An engineer, or programmer, or perhaps in another reincarnation a guy parting a sea of koolaid after the local ruler swindled his peeps out of another payment for moving some heavy ass stone blocks, but I digress.
And in response to peoples worries, anxieties, everyday problems and concerns, every one of these would be wiseman, every one of these saviors, leaders, and great men spoke these magic words which resonate now down through the ages like the voice of reason and providence:
"Read the FUCKING manual."
"And don't bother me again asshole." (well this last bit is all me, but I'm sure others said it too.)2 -
WH YDOES IT FUCKING THINK I AM NOT WRITING TO GL_POSITION FOR FUCK'S SAKE I JUST WANT TO RENDER MY OBAMA PRISM WITHOUT WORRIES! THIS IS A HUGE PROBLEM THAT I HAVE BEEN WORKING ON FOR 3 FUCKING DAYS NOW WITH NOTHING BUT HEADACHES AS THE REWARD! FUCK YOU WHO INVENTED OPENGL5
-
My CS grade came in today and I'm sad because even at my best I could not get through it. Even with all the time I spent in and out of class, and those sleepless nights spent programming into the morning. All this effort and I still couldn't pass this class. My final killed me, and i'm upset because I know this exam doesn't represent all that I can do. It worries me because I feel like I will be told by employers that I'm not qualified because of a number. The number isn't everything, there's a story to every number.8
-
Despite all the code bugs, manager worries, colleagues' annoyances, self pity, low self esteem, constant guilt all the way, we are still alive and kicking
I guess 2022 will be nothing different but I also wish it will be super interesting and satisfying
Wish You And Your Families a Very Happy New Year 2022!1 -
Ugh... some people...
Just left the office early because of the toxic climate. That one infamous collegue is basically unable to communicate without being a narcissistic 5-year-old and was arguing whether we should write a test (I was going to write the test) that would need a single additional branch in the build system.
(The test was for a parser and it should test whether it can handle absolute paths. A simple regression test with a file and an expected output. Because absolute paths are different for every platform and user, the files to be parsed would have to be generated with appropriate paths before the tests were run. Well that would require one single python script and a single line in the script that runs the script and DONE)
Well that guy was unable to focus on his own work and started an argument about whether that test was necessary.
Even though I still think it is necessary, it might have been a reasonable argument if he would have acted more agreeable. But he was saying the feature was useless anyways "everyone will use relative paths only anyways" and "because noone here cares a ratass about maintaining the tests it will all fall on me again" ..
Wtf was this guys problem, I (CAPS) was going to write the stupid test and since when do we not write tests in order to better maintain our product? I get that he worries that the test environment will get more messy, but thats better than having the product code go messy or unfunctional! And c'mon guys, how are absolute paths a redundant feature... -
Not in prod today, but was part of a group project that we handed in and which got us an A.
The project was to write a PID controller for a robot that would drive along a track using a sensor to follow markings on the floor. During development we were drawing graphs of the PID parameters and sensor input every tick, which caused a bit of lag but no worries - we'll turn it off for the trial runs.
Imagine our pikachu shock meme when we turned off the graphs and our calibrations were suddenly *way* off since we had been oversteering all along to compensate for the lag.
There wasn't enough time to optimize it before the deadline and using sleeps didn't produce the same "type" of lag, so we just made the graph minimize itself when it opened. To this day I wonder if the professor ever saw it or if we got the A despite it. -
When you're so exhausted that the weekend isn't enough for you to reset anymore, that your manager won't pull you off the project because client likes you (or that he just doesn't want to lose the project), that you can't quit, or kill yourself (because you start getting those ideas), since sister depends on you financially and you just care for her that much, you just keep going, wearing your smiling face at all times, trying to continue shitting code because it's your job, and what's left of you deep inside is yelling for help.
Man, do I need a new job.
No worries people. I just really need some whining right now. Hopefully I get news from my latest interviews. -
For those of you who want something comparable to the full Dark themes people have used on Linux for years here's a high contrast windows theme that doesn't look like garbage. I'm absolutely in love with it and will never go back. It's my favorite theme since the Windows classic theme. Also it's just a theme profile, so no worries about modding files or installing some malware infested theme manager.
https://eversins.deviantart.com/art... -
So I am on a vacation for a month and a few days before it ends. My boss calls me and tells me "why don't you take one more week" then he told me that's when he will be back to work as well because he is traveling. When I told him why he said he wants to talk to be before getting back to work.
When he found me sounding worried, he said don't worry there is nothing you are missing we just want to align our plans and give you updates on the period you were gone for.
When I asked him what if I wanted to get back to work sooner, he said I prefer if you wait till I come back
And now I am super worried and paranoid, advice please 😥5 -
At any given company, there are
those that do
and
those that do not
I've mostly (and sadly) worked with the latter
and those are the people who are like "ahhh yeah, no worries, don't worry about it! we need you to stay positive, not rage! why you get so worked up?" and i'm like YEAH YOU DONT HAVE TO FUCKING WORRY BECAUSE YOU DONT DO ANYTHING! YOU HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO RESPONSIBILITY IN THIS COMPANY AND ARE A FLOATING BLOB COLLECTING YOUR PAYCHECK, THAT'S WHY I GET ALL NEW ASSIGNMENTS AND AM RESPONSIBLE FOR THEM WHILE YOU ARE STILL WORKING ON TASKS ASSIGNED TO YOU TWO QUARTERS AGO!!!!!!!!
god who am i kidding, it'll never change
...man I am on an absolute rant rampage the past few days, feels good >:) -
@devs with sizeable student loans:
How are you finding paying back your loans? Is it super tight? Not at all? How long are you/have you taken to repay?
I know this will be different for everybody but I’m interested in seeing a variety of answers!11 -
Me: „we are going to reschedule the standup to 11pm“
Coworker: „Ok, sure thing“
Me: „You might want to set yourself a reminder so you do not forget it?“
Coworker: „No worries, I got this“
Me @ 11pm: „Where the hell is he?“ -
I'm a tiny bit happy today.
Recently I've been noticing that I'm developing a tolerance for deeply crowded spaces. I don't know if the AC/DC concert was an effective shock therapy or something.
I'm not at the point where I can comfortably head outside into town by myself yet, but I have a feeling that it's not going to be too long until I can.
Maybe I can even find some joy in "being under people".
Maybe make some contacts, friends, whatever.
The biggest challenge will probably be getting over my, I guess "crippling" isn't the right word, but close-ish to it, self-conscious.
The worst thing is that as of yet, I have no idea why I'm still like that.
I think I know the root cause, but that's not something relevant right now.
Hell, I go out with friends, guys and girls, and eventually it goes like:
>"How come you are not dating someone?"
>"Can't really. Can't go out and fine someone, also I think I'm not good-looking enough."
>"Bullshit, you look awesome."
That's coming from close friends, hence why I don't believe it's just some "oh, he'll feel better if I compliment him" shite.
I somehow am unable to gain self worth from compliments.
[...]
In other news, I got a certificate at the FernUni Hagen for a course in IT project management.
Also, my programming and solution finding/problem solving skills are improving noticeable. I think.
I'm not in Uni or anything, but I feel like I'm getting more competent/professional in my development activities at work.
Contrary to what I stated above, I can gain self worth from good work done.
...which worries me, because I am afraid that eventually I'll only be able to feel good after having worked myself to the metaphorical bone.
In job college, I talk to my classmates.
Turns out, everybody is mostly sitting on their ass doing fuck all at work. They are telling me that I'm a workaholic.
I think that I'm either going mad, or that they are lazy fuckers.
From Wednesday to Thursday evening, three colleagues and I went to the CAS Partner Preview Day & CAS Customer Centricity Forum in Karlsruhe. Lots of talks (mostly boasting about themselves), some workshops and a lot of "networking opportunities".
Stuff which I mostly consider bullshit, but I never would've figured how effective it is to put on a smile and feign interest in things.
Some of that feigned interest turned into actual interest and we "networked" for hours.
It was a good training for social interactions outside my direct comfort zone.
Thank you for reading the ramdump of my mind.
$./felix
Segmentation Fault
Core dumped6 -
URG!
I cannot think about a title, so just story:
in my position as multi headed chimera one of my ongoing task is it to dedust old excel sheets, processes and other super inefficient relics that steal time. Mostly i solve those with some tiny vba scripts, bigger vba scripts or a tiny java applications. usually that takes a few hours or maybe two days, depending on what i think is necessary.
the current task at hand is for our (physical) production, work time is noted on a sheet of paper and later given to the production head. Who then proceeds to type it all in excel to do his thing. The guy is starved of time by a huuge margin.
So, crafty kangaroo that i am i think: a barcode scanner, some raspberry pis with touchscreens and some mediocre php/mysql/javascript will make our worries go away. of course this will be a longer task but there is no need to have it done immidiatly. So crafted a working prototype, presented it in the weekly company meeting and got it "greenlighted".
The other day our CEO-like guy was ranting that nothing in this company gets ever done and that people wasting their time with useless projects and named my project among them.
I dont get humans. First he gives thumbs up for this, knowing that it will probably take me 100 hours or so to create in a working manner but later he calls it "a waste of time?" I presented the use (reducing expensive mantime, paper waste and room for fudgery) and yet he calls it useless? (well, his point was that there are other problems (which are out of my reach anyway))
they guy normally is pretty nice and has an ear for problems, but when it comes to higher computer stuff (>excel) he really struggles.
:/
i really like my side project, gives me room to flex some muscles and test stuff. Also playing with raspberry pis on worktime.
On a sidenote, anyone ever tried raspi mesh networks and knows where i get working >10 inch capacitive touch screens? -
I finally attempted php, I wrote a bunch of scripts to fetch data... I feel like I have betrayed myself 😞😞😞
I should have just absorbed the cost of azure 😭😭😭 now am a php dev.... The things I'm about to do, the horrors I'm about to put out into the world.... Pulling your hair out will be the least of your worries, dear maintainer forgive us all, always and forever. 😳1 -
Why do package maintainers stop answering and go silent?!
I've waited for more than two weeks on acceptance on my PR, the maintainers hasn't been active and I've even notified them of my worries.. But so far no activity.
Why the fuck does a package like date-fns have maintainers that doesn't answer? Furthermore, I can see one of them making private contributions on Github..
I need this package to help on another package to finish my project 😭8 -
Tl;dr I am incredibly ashamed of my code at work.
I recently started working as a junior dev. I know many aspects of the stack I use, and I feel pretty comfortable when solving simple and specific problems.
But this is the first complete project I make, and I received no peer review until now. And my code sucks.
I tried my best to deliver a good and working code, but it became messy in too many places. Now it's too late to refactor.
Probably I just cannot see the right way of modeling specific situations, I don't feel I should blame the frameworks I'm using, but the point is that my code sucks. Or at least this is how I feel.
I'm going to leave this workplace soon (personal reasons, not related to this topic and/or the company), and I am kinda scared of the shit I'm about to leave to them. It's a very nice environment and they don't deserve this crap. Also I have some other good reasons to worry about this, but I cannot tell them.
My plan is to finish a couple or personal stuff I have to do and then spend as many hours I can on the project trying to finish it asap and make the code better (for now I've been working only 6hr/day).
I'm really thinking that I just suck at this.12 -
!dev
Hello there..
I always wanted to have my first post here be something that pisses the sh!t out of me.
tl;dr: Memes are for braindeads and kids are fucktards
Backstory:
So basicaly I am now having a summerjob before my next semester starts so I can make some cash to buy some overpriced stuff I dont probably need. I work at a factory, 3 shift work and today we had Night shift, so there was me and a bunch of Arab guys, kicking our asses by pure boredom and desperacy.
Act One:
I was bored, opened my phone and decided entertain myself by some funny sh!t I can find on Mark Sugarhills webpage. I was just passing by some random a bit funny stuff and then I found some random ass meme, which doesnt give a single, even distant sence to me.. So since my german is as good as my coding skills (read: complete shit) I couldnt ask for opinion of my fellow coworkers and since its fuck1ng 4am theres noone to ask on messenger or whatever. So I did it... I asked in a goddamn comments, what the fck is that supposed to mean and Aw dear Lawd... I did a mistake.
Act 2:
Like 4 seconds after my question I had a response and I was like 0.o It has to be some Alice of Facebook so I guess someone cool. Oh boy I was never so wrong. The answer... the... FUCKING answer was.... "normie."
What the actual fuck?
Like man statisticaly speaking, there is 200,000 people on this wannabe funny site and since everyone is apparently laughing their asses off, I am the motherfucking original snowflake.
But I wanted to play it cool... was like Uhm sorry, I really tried but cant figure it out.
His fuck-me-sideways-with-rusty-crowbar answer was:
a) The joke is hidden in some random thing we created yesterday and decided to call it a culture
b) "u dumb"
Act 3:
I hope that most of you finally guessed it! Its the second fucking answer and oh sweet mother of pain, please find him, BUT thats where I flipped and fucking lost it.
The fucking nerve to speak to me like that u dissrespectful piece of shit. Go watch some Twitch, while I SSH into ur ass and hit u harder than ur mom her forehead everynight when she realises that she could have swallow you dickhead.
Afterthoughts:
I was always worries that my child would like to be a Rapper, or Youtuber...
But today Im adding being some dumb ass meme creator.8 -
The year is 1999/2000 and my parents bought my brother a PC. Pentium processor, 128MB of RAM and a Sony Trinitron monitor. Sweet machine. Used to play Delta force, Heroes on it. My brother played Civ 2/3, Heroes 3 etc. Lovely times, no worries, no stress, the only pain was the champagne.
-
Thank you for arming robots ( for every day use ),
I didn't have enough worries already, hope this
stays in the US ( I know,.. it won't )
https://youtube.com/watch/...2 -
Everytime I have to work on some old Asp.Net shit. WebForms/WinForms etc.
Everything with that bullshitass designer. You wanna open a file you've just created? Sorry, error. Restart IDE and maybe...
Restarted website? Sorry. Old instance still hangs somewhere in IIS, so the port is taken...
Seeing code light up red when cleaning the project. Compiler being like "What the fuck is 'void'?"
Or - I know you didnt make any changes, but Im gonna build AppCode folder anyway... Its only gonna take a minute or two, no worries.
Or - You have XML template file to this class (codebehind)? You wanna open the XML? Would be shame if it was opened in the designer view and your entire IDE crashed 'cuz of some unsuported third party UI element.
Or - just unexpected debug session crashes.
And dont make me start on Xamarin...1 -
So some of you might know I'm facing youtube iframe issues, to autoplay them in mobile
Background:
> https://devrant.com/rants/1449270/...
> https://devrant.com/rants/1450121/...
So few weeks later I found a solution to make it work the way it should in mobile i.e. to autoplay after a click on svg play button,
The logic I used https://codepen.io/briangelhaus/...
Boy oh boy I was so fucking happy, jumped out of my chair basically, So I grab a couple of android devices and it works
Enter infamous E-Corp Apple, the logic I used will never work on any apple devices, because apple do not allow autoplay on mobile, So I was like "okay, no worries"
I tell this news to my manager who is aware that I am working on this since weeks and he looks astonished for a millisecond when after hearing the same can't be done Apple, Tells me "then the issue is not fixed"
Well, you're not wrong, but a little appreciation to a trainee / jr dev who accomplished this by manipulating this would mean a lot for me.
And to Apple and Youtube Iframe API, FUCK YOU3 -
Not 100% hackathon, but I was once in one of those weekend coding challenges - aka: have idea, implement MVP, present to a Juri and get a chance to win a prize.
So, to start things off, you had a few months to prepare the idea, gather a team (minimum of 2, maximum of 5 per team) and register.
I gathered a few friends from university, that was cool. We were 5, I had the idea already, they agreed. I started talking business with some partners/governmental stuff (no time to explain all, ask in comments if you want to know).
2 weeks pass by after registering, still 1+ month before the event, 2 of the team members let me know they want to focus on university, so they cannot spend a weekend on this competition. Well, ok, still 3 people, no worries.
Fast forward, 1 week before the competition, another one says he won't be in town, we're 2. Still enough, we meet the requirements, it's just for the fun anyways.
Day 1 of the competition, I'm there waiting for my other teammate. Call him countless times, doesn't pick up. Later tells me he's sick.
I tell the organization about it. They asked: You can continue, but it's fine if you give up now.
> Yo, dafuck you mean give up? I'll die before I give up. It's for the fun anyways, worst case scenario I spend a nice weekend doing what I like *shrug*
So there I am, all alone, doing a first MVP of the mobile app in Android (without any prior android experience, and don't ask me why I chose to do mobile app for that project, was stupid back then).
Lots of nice things there, overall a good weekend, networking, food, gadgets and stuff like that.
Juri day, put on pretty clothes to present my super idea alongside my super MVP of the ugliest mobile app I've seen.
Judge 1: likes the idea, ugly app.
Judge 2: likes the idea, ugly app, could improve and work on the concept, etc
Judge 3: Lots of business questions, to which I came prepared with already potential clients and partners, liked that part although seemed a little confident of it working or not.
Judge 4: "Yo, that's the most stupid thing I've heard, not even gonna ask questions, that's just stupid"
Judge 5: A teacher in my university, the one to actually tell me about this competition, kind of like that meme from "How to train your dragon" where he does the thumbs up thing. Obviously the app sucks, but understandable, no one in the competition has much experience, bla bla bla
---
Final decision: No prize, fuck the idea, got a participation amazon voucher of like, $10 usd. *shurg*
--
Fast forward a few months, my aunt who shared the idea with me and who i was working with before the competition, sends me a link for an article on FB messenger.
The company where that MF judge worked at build a system exactly like the one I presented, claiming it was a very innovative idea. Never heard of them again, it was a consultation company (Deloitte), so I assume they didn't sell it well and dropped it also.
Moral of the story: I guess there's no moral, just have fun.2 -
Just thought the other day of something: AI devs are developing what will make their job useless, as AIs will be able to do programming. AIs will probably take over each and every job and we won’t have to work anymore.
They’ll eradicate diseases and we’ll live for quite a long time. When the basics needs will be completely fulfilled, their goal will be to make of the world a human paradise, with the goal in mind of making us happy and have no worries.
Then they’ll make it to the next level and plug us to a virtual world. It’ll be a paradise, an utopia and it will probably be like the 1st Matrix...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Or it may just not happen, but can we be sure of that… I’ve always laughed at people saying technology will end humanity, but now I realize that killing all of us is not the only way to end the humanity …7 -
hey devs, hope you all are doing good..
I was frustated by my salary.. I mean in this job I am good but I didn't got the expected growth..
So I find a job .. but before resigning because I know my boss is cool atleast he will listen .. so I leave him a message that I wanted to do more.. and got the other offers.. He said no worries.. we will match your package.. but now you can be associate TL and handle the team also..
I took the offer..
atleast I am satisified. The thing is new team is mostly are dumbo :( Will see how long I can pull..
or I am hoping my next rants will be something like.. I will join as junior dev pr same salary.. just take me out from this fucking TL role.. because I know what team is going to do.. someone stuck.. ask TL.. someone have internet issue ask TL.. don;t know css.. ask TL.. dont know logic.. ask TL. its look like I have to be google for team
Anyways will see how it goes.. I wish me luck
Ohh yeah if you are in TL roles.. could you share your experience please2 -
So people are getting new jobs left and right, and there are several others looking for new jobs including me...
Well... now the CIO is following people around the office and watching them walk to their car and stuff. To me this just makes the situation worse.
If he's so worries about people leaving then why doesn't he hire people instead of trying drive everyone out? -
so i'm about to deploy admin application which doesn't have admins passwords hashed
after asking him, wtf dude?
he replied, no worries mate
fml5 -
I'm currently having a problems sleeping my inner philosopher just keeps thinking about various things. I wanna try to write some of them down as an simply to see what will happen.
I'll write my opinion down as honest as possible so feel free to disagree, but point out what I should rethink, if you want me to consider it.
To me respect has to be earned. I think especially on the internet many people try to skip this crucial step when they try to get respect. Most often when they want an opinion or their ideals to be respected. Most of the time it doesn't even feel like they want to be respected, but rather accepted.
There's nothing wrong with accepted in my opinion, but there are several approaches to get to this point and I despise some of them.
Earning acceptance by earning respect is one of the right ways to do it. Working hard towards your goals, showing your individual strength, standing behind your ideals. These are things I can respect.
I should also mention that these Ideals should be concrete, based on rational thought and a general good will or you will just twist my words to say that I support e.g. IS, Stalin's politics ect.
On a side node, I think it'd be wrong to disrespect everything Stalin did, since, from an economical point of view, he pushed Russia forward by quite a bit.
Then on the other side I see crybabies. People who want to be accepted, without putting effort in their ideals. Most of the time not even aiming for acceptance through respect, but through pity. Honestly, that's all they're going to get from me.
Pity, for their petty ideals.
Basically all I ever see these people doing is attention whoring and practicing multiple deadly sins at once.
Wrath, jealousy, sloth, pride, greed and optionally also gluttony.
Lust is rather a separate package. When I think about it, I link it mostly to horny teens and "send bob and vegane" type of stuff.
Gluttony being powered by sloth or vice versa, enhancing it.
The clear image I have in mind, while I write about this packages of deadly sins however, is that of a jealous person, complaining / getting angry about something they could change change themselves, but want them to be changed for them. Mostly through social networks such as Facebook, Twitter and whatever the fuck Tumblr is supposed to be.
"I wanna be rich, why is <person> richt but I'm not? This world is so unfair 😡". Have you tried working towards becoming rich?
"I don't don't feel pretty. Accept me". Accept yourself. Done.
"I don't like <person or organization>'s doing". If that's the whole message, all you probably did so far is complaining or crying. Sweet tears.
Stuff like that can happen to any person, just like any person makes mistakes.
Mistakes are made to learn from them. If you realize realize and accept your mistakes others may do so as well and forgive you.
But we are he towards this idiotic trend where people just can swallow their pride even for microscopic things. They instead push their pride to higher levels of ignorance, blaming other people, l(ying)mfao, creating black holes of density in the process. Makes me wonder whether their real motive is an inside bet on who can get the most people to kill them selves by face palming.
Most of my life I have been fairly protected against these people, besides some spikes of incompetence, but recently the have invaded 2 areas in my world that make the world somewhat less of a pain. Programming and the internet culture.
Yes, I'm talking about that master / slave BS renaming and article 11 and 13.
The remaking itself isn't really the problem, but rather the context. This was basically a show of power for the self proclaimed "social justice warriors" or SJW for short.
The fact that this madness has spread. That's what worries me. To me it feels like the first zombie has spawned.
Then we have this corrupted piece of incompetent shit, called Axel Voss, and other old farts.
They live in a galaxy far away from reality, somewhere in the European Parlament, making laws they don't know shit about, regulating things they know shit about.
All in the name of the people of the EU of course. And by people we obviously talk about the money.
I can honestly not think of another reason, after reading the replies Voss and his party gave on Twitter regarding the shit they pulled off.
Well, at least none that doesn't involve some firm of brain death.
For now I'll show them as much as possible how much I despise / reject them. Currently playing with the thought of some kind (social media?) website were posts from other sites or actions in general can be rated only with "Fuck you"s.
Given these articles, I should not have them hosted in an European country though 😅.
Almost hitting that 5k character limit 😰1 -
I saw a thing on the Workplace stack exchange site. This college kid with no in industry experience read the false narrative that "pitting your testers against your developers for bonus money encourages better productivity and bug free code". And thought it sounded good on paper. This worries me in many ways (especially since he wants to make a startup). The first being that he couldn't see how both sides would game the hell out of such a system, which I feel any worthwhile engineer types would easily figure out. The second is seeing money as the major motivating force behind software devs doing their jobs. I had a third but I am tired.
But seriously, who is still writing this bullshit (that article, not the kid's question) in 2016? -
Since I have some equipment, time, and energy, I want to flesh out stuff in my homelab/homenet. What should I put into a VM to secure my home network, since it runs my website as well? My dad worries about his data being compromised.
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Apple's methodology:
Hmmm this seems like a bug...No worries, we'll call it a feature and no one will ever know!2 -
One day I decided I wanted to build robots.
And not kidding the reason I wanted to build them was because I wanted someone interesting to talk to and stil not kidding I even fantasized about a robot girlfriend... Lame I know I think I was a lonely little guy back then, though even after 7 years or so it doesn't feel as though it's that long ago. Maybe because things didn't change that much. Which is worrying but it's not the topic so I will pass on that future-past worries bullcrapper. After learning how robots worked and what made them function so things gradually led up to me being more interested in machine learning applications and software. I learned Arduino at first, I think I still have some messy circuits and old arduinos around. I only finished one robot though and it couldn't even support it's own weight. The servo motors were taking too many amps that heated up the little arduino even with a fan attached. Provably I should have made use of mechanics for robots books and calculated things first. But even though it couldn't walk properly I still felt success and I loved it like my own kid (me taking it apart was questionable but believe me). After that I focused more on writing code than using my hands to make things which was a pain in the ass if I might add.
After learning arduino and making that failed project of mine. I then picked up C++ wrote hello world program usual things a starter would do. It was the language I wrote my first game which I finished and this time it worked. But I never released it which was partly because I didn't want to spend a hundred bucks on a license for the engine and I also knew that it was a shit game. If I were to describe; lines in different colors come from the top you need to hit the lines with the same colored columns to break them. The columns changed their height and location on random. The lines sped up and gap between them decreased. Now that I think about it it wasn't half bad. But the code was written in game maker studio's version of C so I have no way to salvage it.
But I learned a lot of things from that project and that was the goal, so I would call it a win. I don't remember but after sometime I switched to python. And I'm glad I did, it's fun to code in which was the main reason I coded in the first place. Fun.
Life happens and time passes,
Now I'm waiting to enter college exams in a few months after hopefully passing them. My goal is to get into computer engineering which will be extremely challenging because it's the highest point department in the university I'm aiming at. But hey if the challenge is great the reward is greater right ? To be honest I'm still not sure about my career path. Too many choices. So I will just let my own road called <millions of similarly random events that are actually caused by deterministic reactions, to affect you and your surroundings leading up to a future which only the Laplace's demon can forsee> guide me. Wish me luck.1 -
i need an adult. I know noone who would understand my worries, so you guys need to be it.
i have a nextcloud running on my raspberry pi. performance is horrible, dont ask, but it works.
i mostly use it to backup the photos of my phone sd card every night when my phone charges. Internally this works good. If i am elseplace it wont for obvious reasons.
In my youthful joy of doom i opened port 443 and forward it to my raspi. I get internet via cable and my ip is pretty much static (it was the same for 10 months). So external access is provided.
Now i thought, its stupid that i cannot sign an ssl certificate cause i dont have a domain. Lets buy domain. But before i do that i did some try runs with duckdns to test the principle.
Some back and forth, it works now. Pretty god, i could even make a cron job on the raspbi to renew (that should work right?). Only problem. randoname.duckdns.org doesnt work internally. Or should not at least.
So i googled a bit and it turns out that my router (a cable fritz!box i bought myself) can be a local network dns. Or cannot. Regardless what i try, it doesnt accept the changed config file.
Now the problem.
It works anyway. randoname.duckdns.org points to my external "static" ip and resolves to that from my internal network..so it works on my phone or laptop. if i traceroute the thing it goes via two hops out and finishes in less than 1ms.
Now to the problem:
I have no fokkin clue why. The expected behaviour would be that it shouldnt work. If i do what i intended todo on pc in the hosts file tracert works correctly, directly pointing to the internal ip.
What i cannot figure out, is it the fritz!box being smart? Is it my ISP being smart?
Reason to rant: i have absolutly NOONE to ask, i know not a single person who would even understand what troubles me. I want to learn, i want to know WHY not just some mindless russian patchwork of "if it works its good enough".
thats depressing.8 -
So today was my last day before heading off for an2 week holiday. Spent most of the day explaining to my team what needs to be done and how everything has been structured for the current project, but I get the feeling they don't understand any of it.
Pretty sure I'll be coming back to a clusterfuck. -
I'd like to work for a small software house that pays decent, understands a life/work balance (40hr/wk), has a relaxed environment, worries more about the end product than timelines, and gives you Fridays to work on pet projects and training.
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So I’m a new team lead for a group of awesome engineers. I feel like I’m too essential to this team, apparently they don’t do quite as well when I’m on holidays which worries me. I often try to explain what i know but it doesn’t seem to change the situation. I’m not getting specific feedback from anyone on how to improve my ability to disseminate information which might be because folks are intimidated/generally anxious. Does anyone here have any strategies to help others to grow and share your knowledge? Book recommendations are welcome too!2
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Meeting with a company that'll help you exit is tomorrow? No worries, get your devs to build 9736372 features before EOD!
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Kinda weird posting it directly after @OmerFlame but…
JoyRant has image upload now.
With image preview. Great idea, no worries about uploading your dick pics by accident, now. Forgot the name of the guy who suggested it 😄
And there is a macOS version in TestFlight, too.
https://testflight.apple.com/join/...
Thanks to @OmerFlame for SwiftRant, btw! 😄1 -
random thought:
Life= tension. But you are only winning it if you don't let these tensions divert you from "what you gotta do"
Life will always find a way to give you some kind of problem. if you are not tensed about something, you ain't living a life.
But we often start ignoring our favourite habits/ aspirations/ goals in order to tackle these problems .
For eg I had made a habit of meditating for 15 mins followed by 45 mins of workout b/w 7-8pm last year. but since January 12th there hasn't been a day when i could achieve this habit simply because life kept throwing random tensions at me.
1. first my hand got fractured and i had to leave gym for a month. "no worries", i thought. "meditation doesn't require a working hand and i could do start walking as an excercise from next month"
2. then my office got wfo 3/5 days. i will get back to home after 7.30 and on wfh days my work won't finish till 8 on home days. "no worries" , i thought
"i will shift it to 9-10 every night next month"
3. then next month office got wfo 4/5 days annd family started steps for buying a new home. all time affter pfffice went into those steps/discussions "no worries ", i thought. "it wiill be over by the next month and i will be free"
this next month hasn't fome yet :/3 -
WOO!!! Taking cord cutting to the extreme!!
The dual channel TV tuner arrived, took it out for a test drive by setting up a few scheduled recordings.
Quality isn't as good as 4K TV and it takes a lot of space as it doesn't use a compressed format... But no more Prime, commercials, and now can watch at 2x speed! Plus that's what the 1TB HD is for...
Though now my worries about drive failure are coming back...14 -
Recently I am on my exams and I need to study well, On the other hand , all of the things I am studying has no link to my dream job !! So why should I study it and not to choose what to study .. Even though, I don’t really care and I keep on programming because it’s what I love ..💕🚶🏻♀️, no worries, I still study too.. I like studying and learning new information but I hate tests and exams,,🙆🏻♀️💔11
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I'm getting contacted by remotely.works with job offers, I like the idea of doubling my current salary, but it really worries me the job stability and I believe switching jobs to work remote for a US-based company leaves me with responsibilities an employer normally take cares for me.
Should I risk it and give it a try?3 -
Anyone Know what the 'fixer for java' chrome extension does. How bad is it?
My boss had an extension called 'fixer for java' on her chrome browser. Now to me that sounds sketchy so I'm trying to find it online to see if the description or website can alleviate my worries about the boss getting hacked but I can't, does anyone know what the hell it is for, She's out of the office tomorrow so I'm gonna run all the virus scans but if i can get some information sooner that would be great.
thank you for your time.7 -
Remember way back when when most people lived their lives and the country had not finished being categorized idiotically, supposedly it is now anyway, and people had conversations? And new things happened? And people like me had no clue what the trashy retards around them were doing ? So much happier.
As in there were different stresses and worries
Then there was that brief time things were organized as they should be and traffic was light and people were healthier?
Didn't hear so much obnoxious coughing then1 -
Anything wrong happens on my django project.
Oh no worries, It's just
python manage.py makemigrations && python manage.py migrate .1
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