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Search - "fuck apple"
As a long-time iPhone user, I am really sorry to say it but I think Apple has completed their transition to being a company that is incompetent when it comes to software development and software development processes.
I’ve grown tired of hearing some developers tell me about Apple’s scale and how software development is hard and how bugs should be expected. All of those are true, but like most rules of law, incompetence and gross negligence trumps all of that.
I’m writing this because of the telugu “bug”/massive, massive security issue in iOS 11.2.5. I personally think it’s one of the worst security issues in the history of modern devices/software in terms of its ease of exploitation, vast reach, and devastating impact if used strategically. But, as a software developer, I would have been able to see past all of that, but Apple has shown their true incompetence on this issue and this isn’t about a bug.
It’s about a company that has a catastrophic bug in their desktop and mobile platforms and haven’t been able to, or cared to, patch it in the 3 or so days it’s been known about. It’s about a company, who as of a view days ago, hasn’t followed the basic software development process of removing an update (11.2.5) that was found to be flawed and broken. Bugs happen, but that kind of incompetence is cultural and isn’t a mistake and it certainly isn’t something that people should try to justify.
This has also shown Apple’s gross incompetence in terms of software QA. This isn’t the first time a non-standard character has crashed iOS. Why would a competent software company implement a step in their QA, after the previous incident(s), to specifically test for issues like this? While Android has its issues too and I know some here don’t like Google, no one can deny that Google at least has a solid and far superior QA process compared to Apple.
Why am I writing this? Because I’m fed up. Apple has completely lost its way. devRant was inaccessible to iOS users a couple of times because of this bug and I know many, many other apps and websites that feature user-generated content experienced the same thing. It’s catastrophic. Many times we get sidetracked and really into security issues, like meltdown/spectre that are exponentially harder to take advantage of than this one. This issue can be exploited by a 3 year old. I bet no one can produce a case where a security issue was this exploitable yet this ignored on a whole.
Alas, here we are, days later, and the incompetent leadership at Apple has still not patched one of the worst security bugs the world has ever seen.101
I was looking for about a month for a laptop. Then on this one magical day I open kijiji and see a Toshiba Thinkpad T450s with 20gb of ram, 138 ssd and an i5-6300U cpu going fo 500$ (value 2000+).
My first thought was. Okay. Scam alert. But you know. What if?
So I call up this person. And its a girl who got a pc from her bf, but really she wanted a mac so she is selling it.
This straight up blew my mind. I decided, fuck it. Got 500. Ran to her. Ran a systems check on the laptop. Checked for any attempts at opening it up. Checked the harddrive. Checked the ram. Everything is solid.
Long story short. Thank god for apple fangirls!34
Mac: Suddenly turns off
Me: Fuck my code..F***
Mac: No response at all
Me: reset SMC etc etc
Mac: I am dead (no battery detection, dies after 10 min on power adaptor)
Me: Skips a heart beat..(Git, oh yea git)
**Takes Mac to store, After diagnosis**
Apple Freaking Genius (AG): Your Mac has a mother board problem it needs to be replaced.
Me: Hmm what is the problem exactly??
AG: Issues in logic board and some other components.
Me: How much?
AG: Out of warranty so $$$ (60% of original amount)
Me: (wtf?) Really
AG: It's entire motherboard replacement .. bla bla
**Bring it home > open > everything seems ok on multimeter as per circuit diagram > finally finds a voltage drop that is not consistent > minute short circuit > remove > check further > nothing else > reassemble > hit power button > starts fine > freaking battery detected > works fine**
0 $ repair
Fixes two more devices @ 0 $ in friend circle
Builds a raspberry pi backup laptop with 3d printed body..Ubuntu.. you know can't live without a computer
Apple, which dumb fuck thought this would be good? ok new mouse, no more batteries it can be charged on a wire, cool you may think, until it actually needs charging and you discover that the charging port is on the bottom, making the mouse unusable whilst charging!!!54
At the airport.
Security: Please put all your electronics in the bin, including your watch.
Me: No problem
<goes through scanner>
Me: there was an Apple Watch in here and now it is gone.
Security: Oh, you lost your Apple Watch?
Me: No! I put my Apple Watch in the bin like you instructed and YOU lost my Apple Watch.
Security: It must be in the spinners.
Me: So my $500 Watch is in the spinners being run over by bins?
Security: you have to put the small things on the bottom.
Me: It was on the bottom and I did as you asked, this is entirely on you. Do not try to shift the blame to me again please.
Security: As I said...
Me: As I said, Do not try to shift the blame to me again. This is entirely your responsibility once you separate me from my electronics so you can perform security theatre. Have a nice day.
Fuck this god damn security theatre. Fuck the dumbasses they hire. Fuck your country. Fuck your god damn feeling of insecurity. Fuck Your ineffective security theatre.
Sick my fucking dick until you choke and gag you worthless pieces of shit. Homeless people the street provide more security than you incompetent, under-educated assholes. Fuck you
And yes, I have 2 fucking laptops. I have a real fucking job where I provide actual value and for that I need a work laptop. I don’t come to work in a stupid looking outfit with a chip on my shoulder looking to inconvenience people. I come to work to provide real value to someone.
Fuck you and your worthless bullshit44
I fucking hate CNET already. I mean who likes a website which autoplays a video everytime you visit them, with 200% volume.
But this time, I am just so fucking annoyed. Here is the title of an article:
"iPhone 8, X's wireless charging is a game changer for Android"
And the subtitle:
"When it comes to Apple, plenty of Android phone makers are monkey see, monkey do."
FUck you motherfucker. "Monkey see, monkey do". Are you fucking kidding me you cunt?
Remeber your 3D touch bullshit? Your fucking wireless charging will be bullshit too.
"the rest of the phone users make do with messy cables."
Maybe you're a fucking imbecile who doesn't know how to manage simple cables and ends up with broken wires.
You know who looks like a monkey? Some apple users who uses that shitty looking wireless earphone, which looks like monkey's dick you asshole.
Me(m) vs Apple(a)
m - hey apple!
m - apple?
a - oh yeah, who are u?
m - umm, titan?
a - titan who?
m - titanlan- .. umm nevermind . hi , i am a developer :D
a - developer ? hah.. get out.
m - but wait, I want to develop apps for you! I have been developing android apps for last one year and i love mobile dev! wanna talk more on this ?
a - umm.. ugh ok. so you wanna develop apps?
m- yes!, i am doing great at java an-..
a- yeah wait. we don't have that in here. we use swift
m -Oh. no worries , the principles are the same i will watch some free youtube vids and have a plugin for studio or vsco-..
a- yeah wait you can't do that too.we don't have plugins
m - Really, no plugin? then where do people develop ios apps?
m - Oh , how stupid of me , an IDE of course. anyways i can simply install it in my windows or linux an-..
a - nope, you can't do that.
m - what? then where does it run?
m -Oh, then surely you might have some distro or-
a - nope, buy a mac. pass $3000
m- wha-? i just want to run your bloody IDE!
a- oh honey, your $3000 will be totally worth it, you will love it!
m- but i haven't even started making an app, leave alone publishing it.
a- oh, that will cost you another $100 . plus if you wanna test your apps, make sure it runs in our latest , fragile iphones otherwise we won't publish it. that will cost another $1500
m- what? but I already have a fine , high tech laptop and a smartphone!
a- yeah you can dump that
FML. how the fuck is apple living and thriving? lots of selfish motives and greeds i guess? because i don't see a single place where they are using the word "free" or "cheap" .26
I may have an unpopular opinion, but I.......
fucking hate these universal programming languages that try too hard to make cross-platform bullshit easy to develop for. THEY PISS ME OFF SO MUCH...
Like, for example:
STOP FUCKING HAVING 2000 BILLION DEPENDENCIES, LIKE WRITE YOUR OWN ORIGINAL CODE AND TRY NOT TO FUCKING MAKE A MONOLITHIC FUCKING MONSTER OF A CODEBASE. I BET SOMEONE WROTE THE ENTIRETY OF GNU UTILS IN JS, WHAT THE FUCK?!
Yea, let's make a platform that everyone needs a fucking VM for. Sounds great. And also fuck OS GUI guidelines and make our own cancerous looking solaris shit UI, yay.
Microsoft: We will make a UNIVERSAL programming language like C++, but with some stuff from Java.
Microsoft: Universal under Windows platforms that is...
Me: go fuck yourself, you greedy cunt. Atleast Apple has the decency to make Objective-C work on non Apple software, unlike YOU. FUCKING CHEAP BASTARD.
I don't have much against it, but having pip seperate from the package manager on Linux (atleast) is annoying as fuck. And also compiling it into a executable would be "THE FEATURE" and not some 3rd party shitty solution that fucking breaks in a year or two.
Come to think of it, people SHOULD FUCKING STOP TRYING TO MAKE A NO-PORTING UTOPIA SOLUTION, BUT INSTEAD FOCUS ON MAKING IT EASIER TO PORT. A little "#define MYFUCKINGOS" wouldn't fucking hurt, you know. Because at the end if you run a VM, interpreter, have a shit ton of dependencies or just are a fucking monopolistic asshole, you're gonna piss off and divide people.
Image source: https://reddit.com/r/...25
Please stop fucking asking me to install your shitty mobile apps. They do the same thing your site does. I have a browser, and it's a lot better. I don't even visit you every day. But even if I did, and I wanted your crappy app, I'd open the app store and download it by myself. No need to push me.
No need to waste the little screen estate I have with crappy call-to-action sections to download that shit.
Fuck your desire for more information about me. Fuck your narcissistic enjoyment when I have your icon on my fucking home screen.
The truth is, there is a very small number of apps that really need to integrate with a phone to offer better experience.
I feel most of you feel you need to have an app just because everyone else does. And so you could show these little Android and Apple logos on your website or ads. Well, how about you just make sure your site works well on a mobile screen and don't waste your money on a half-baked mobile shit app unless it really offers something worthwhile?
And if you do have a good app and it really does something, ask me just once and fucking respect my choice. Don't just ask me again and again, on every page, with every new session, or I'll just stop visiting.
You're all not that unique, so fuck you!17
Now (since iPhone X) that iPhones can recognise whether you’re watching them or not, it’s a matter of time before YouCrap & Co will pause ads while not watching them.
Think different my ass.12
Gavin: "Christina, so how bad is this? Be honest. Is this windows Vista bad? It is not iPhone 4 bad, is it? Fuck, don't tell me this is Zune bad."
Christina: "Sorry Gavin. It is Apple Maps bad."11
Looks like Apple is the new Microsoft and Microsoft is the new Apple...
I remember when every release of Windows was a catastrophic mess and you had to wait until at least SP2 to get the OS to work in a stable way. And Internet Exploder was *the* browser that broke everything, every time. And there was the whole embrace/extend thing, where they tried to impose their vision of web standards and compatibility, and *everything* you used *had* to come from Microsoft...
And now, it's Apple who fuck up every single OS release, on mobile and desktop, and whose browsers openly shit on web standards (ever try developing anything for Mobile Safari?). Apple's stuff that only works with Apple stuff (down to things like headphone jacks - OOPS, forgot, they dropped those now).
Microsoft is making interesting, beautiful hardware (Surface machines) while Apple is pushing un-innovative, overpriced garbage year in year out. And they're open-sourcing more and more, while Apple walls itself further and further behind its walled "garden". Bleh.
Be interesting to see in 10 years what will have shifted, because it'll change again by then.16
The sheer stupidity of so many Apple supporters is so fucking annoying. I'm not saying everyone that uses Apple is stupid, but I've heard so many fucking people say "Android is awful because it doesn't have iMessage." NO SHIT IT DOESN'T HAVE IMESSAGE, BECAUSE APPLE WANTS TO MAKE IT SUPER FUCKING COMPLICATED TO TALK TO ANYONE THAT DOESN'T USE APPLE. When an iPhone sends a regular SMS message, they revoke all features that Android phones could use for that message (read receipts, using Wi-Fi for SMS, etc...) because Apple doesn't fucking care about anyone that doesn't use Apple. Fuck making their own users' lives easier, the person they are talking to doesn't support Apple!!
Apple, fuck yourself with a chainsaw. And no, not gently.25
WHY THE FUCK DOES MACOS NOT HAVE A FUCKING AUDIOMIXER TO CHANGE THE VOLUME OF DIFFERENT FUCKING APPLICATIONS.
WHY DO OPEN SOURCE ALTERNATIVES NOT WORK AND WHY THE FUCKING FUCK WOULD I PAY 10 FUCKING DOLLARS FOR AN AUDIO MIXER.
THANKS FOR THE FUCKING EAR RAPE APPLE.15
Currently on an internship, PHP mostly, little bit of Python and the usual web stuff, and I just had the BEST FUCKING DAY EVER.
Wake up and find out I'm out of coffee, oh boy here we go.
Bus leaves 10 minutes late, great gonna miss my train.
Trains just don't wanna ride today, back in a bus I go, what's normally a 10 minute train travel is now a 90 minute bus ride.
Arrive at internship, coffee machine is broke, non problem, I'll just lose it slowly.
NOW HERE COMES THE FUCKING GOOD PART!!
Alright, so I'm working on a CMS that can be used just about on any device you want, mobile or desktop, it's huge, billion's of rows of scientific data. Very specific requirements and low error margins. Now, yesterday I was really enjoying myself here until today, Project manager walks in, comes to my desk and hands me a Samsung Gear S3, an Apple watch and some cheap knockoff. He tells me that before the Friday deploy, THE ENTIRE CMS SHOULD WORK ON THOSE WATCHES!
I mean, don't get me wrong, I like a challenge but it's just not right, I mean, I'm still not sure what the right way to handle tables on phones is, but smart watches, just no. Besides that, I've never worked with any Apple devices, let alone WatchOs, nor have I worked with Android Wear.
Also, Project Manager is a total dickhead, he's the kinda guy that prefers a light theme, doesn't clean up his code, writes 0 documentation for an API, 1 space = tab, pure horror.
So after almost flipping my desk, I just called my school coach to announce I'm leaving this internship. After a brief explanation he decides to come over, and guess what, according to the Project Manager I wasn't supposed to do that, I was supposed to test if it would be possible.
Alright people, I'm gonna be blunt here, which is something not often seen from me. Thankfully this platform is used to it.
I am absolutely sick of people hating Windows/MacOS just because of the fucking practices of the companies. Let's take a look at a pro/con list of each OS type respectively.
Pro - Most computers built for it
Pro - Average consumer friendly
Pro - Most games made for it
Con - Proprietary
Con - Shady info collection (disableable)
Con - Can take some work to customize
Pro - Open source
Pro - Hundreds of versions/distros
Pro - Incredibly customizable on all fronts
Con - Can have limited modern hardware support
Con - The good stuff has a steep learning curve
Con - Tends to have unoptimized programs or semi-failed copies of Windows programs
Pro - Actually quite secure in general
Pro - Optimized to all hell (on Apple devices)
Pro - Usually just works
Con - Only (legally) usable on Apple devices
Con - Proprietary
Con - Locked down customization
See? None of them are perfect. Fucking get over it already. Maybe I want to use Windows because it works for me, and it actually does what I need it to. I can disable the spying shit through a few nice programs. Just because I work in IT doesn't mean that I HAVE to hate Windows and LOVE Linux! I mean, Linux is absolutely SPECTACULAR for all of my servers, but as a Desktop OS? Not there for me yet. Check one of my other rants: https://devrant.com/rants/928935/... and you'll see a lot of my gripes with Linux that Windows actually executes well. FUCK!39
Senior development manager in my org posted a rant in slack about how all our issues with app development are from
“Constantly moving goalposts from version to version of Xcode”
It took me a few minutes to calm myself down and not reply. So I’ll vent here to myself as a form of therapy instead.
- You frequently discuss the fact that you don’t like following any of apples standards or app development guidelines. Bit rich to say the goalposts are moving when you have your back to them.
- We have a custom everything (navigation stack handler, table view like control etc). There’s nothing in these that can’t be done with the native ones. All that wasted dev time is on you guys.
- Last week a guy held a session about all the memory leaks he found in these custom libraries/controls. Again, your teams don’t know the basic fundamentals of the language or programming in general really. Not sure how that’s apples fault.
- Your “great emphasis on unit testing” has gotten us 21% coverage on iOS and an Android team recently said to us “yeah looks like the tests won’t compile. Well we haven’t touched them in like a year. Just ignore them”. Stability of the app is definitely on you and the team.
- Having half the app in react-native and half in native (split between objective-c and swift) is making nobodies life easier.
- The company forces us to use a custom built CI/CD solution that regularly runs out of memory, reports false negatives and has no specific mobile features built in. Did apple force this on us too?
- Shut the fuck up6
To install the update make sure the apple watch is connected to a charger.
Dear apple.. how exactly the fuck am i suposed to do that??14
The company I used to like the most, has turned into a pile of steaming bullshit crap.
Just saw this Apple ad on YouTube and out of curiosity watched it to understand the hype.
Description says 108 seconds and video ends in 107 seconds. Idiots.
Well, let's ignore that, but the video is shit fast and made me dizzy.
Neither was I able to read 90% of words and text, nor did I understand what crap they came up with in this new version where one needs to sell both their Lungs to afford it as Kidneys are not alone enough now.
A company which started as a counter culture idea has became one of the most mainstream, status quo brands in the history of capitalism.
Sad to see that stupid humans buy this crap and fall for something which can be achieved in less than 100$.
Fuck you Apple. Steve must be turning in his grave.36
I googled "fuck apple" and ended up here... so yeah fuck this piece of shit company with shitty overpriced cancer inducing products. Xcode is the worse garbage I've ever seen in my life. For a company that masturbates to their superior design well they can eat a fat dick cause its horrible. Everything this fucking company does makes me waste my time. Add a fucking notch to their displays, retarded app store process, makes you workaround to install latest OS on older machines, hide options in convoluted interface, everything, make you feel like your 12 again and living with your parents. fuck them. fuck apple fan boys. fuck tim cook. fuck kids that jack off to iphones fuck you if you own a macbook and drink at starbucks . this is the last fucking ios app I ever make. bye23
A bored developer forced to build and deploy with a virtualized OSX.10
Macbook hard locks right in the middle of my coding run, in an awesome song.
Reboots of its own accord. Decides to try an update. Fails.
I reboot to normal disk:
"You restarted your computer because of a problem."
Uhh, no, YOU fucking broke my shit and my rhythm. Own your fuck-ups.4
New job, started two months ago. Forced to use a MacBook. First time using iShit in my life.
- Laptop reboots randomly every three weeks or so "because of an error" (thanks, very informative error message).
- Sometimes if I use two screens and I lock my laptop, only one screen gets locked.
- The most simple tasks require a fucking large number of clicks. There are almost no keyboard shortcuts. My hand hurts because of this, and after two months the pain is getting worse and worse.
- Yes, I know there are apps that give you extra keyboard shortcuts, but those don't help much. I never used a mouse in 10 years.
- Window management sucks. It's so broken and poor in so many ways, I don't know where to start.
- Random errors and pop-ups are the norm.
- I have only four fucking USB Type C ports. I can somehow understand having only Type C because it looks cool, but fuck at least give me 6 of them, or 8. Do you really have to force me to use a USB hub, in addition to a shitload of adapters?
- Multiple monitors don't work unless the laptop is connected to the power adapter.
- The above point means, in practice, that I have exactly zero USB Type C ports available to me: one is used for the power adapter, two are for the two monitors, and one for the USB hub. Whenever I have to connect something that has Type C, I have to choose between monitors and going fuck myself.
- I don't want to comment on performance, cooling system or battery life. This would be a waste of time. Let's just say that it's shit.
Now, dear Apple fangirls and fanboys, please downvote this rant. I want your downvotes, so please don't hesitate to press that (--) button. But please let me say that these products are shit, pure shit. Fuck Apple and their overpriced products.34
Just who the fuck from apple thought its a good idea to make the FUCKING SCROLL BAR overlap, the FUCKING PROPERTY ARROWS, everytime i accidentaly hover over it? I cant change shit! I have to wait few seconds every time i accidentaly hover over the scrollbar so i can be able to FUCKING CHANGE the value!
Dear Apple Inc,
Fix your shit! We're paying 100$ a year for what? More bugs and toruture? I didnt sign up for this bullshit! Give us back some real quality products, or just buy the company Jetbrains and let them build the IDE for you instead.16
So, as someone who has spent a lot of time in JS and a lot of time elsewhere, here are my views. Please, discuss your opinions with me as well. I am genuinely interested in an intelligent conversation about this topic.
So here's my background: learned HTML/CSS/JS in that order when I was 12 because I liked computers. I was pretty shitty at JS until U was at least 15, but you get the point, Ive had it sploshing about in my brain for a while.
Now, JS certainly has its quirks, no doubt, but theres nothing about the language itself that I would say makes it shitty. Its a very easy leanguage to use, but isn't overdeveloped like VB.net (Or, as I like to call it, TheresAFunctionForThat)
Most of the hate is centered around JS being used for a very broad range of systems. I doubt JS would be in the rant feed so often if it were to stay in its native ecosystem of web browsers. JS can be used in server backend, web frontent, desktop and mobile applications, and even in some system services (Although this isn't very popular as of yet). People seem to be terrified that one very easy to learn language can go so far. And, oh god, its interpreted... How can a system app run off an interpreted language? That's absurd.
My opinion on JSEverything is that it's progress. Thats what we're all about, right? The technologies already in place are unthreatened by JS, it isn't a gamechanger. The only thing JS integration is doing is making tedius and simple tasks easier. Big companies with large systems aren't going to jump ship and migrate to JS. A startup, however, could save a fucking ton of development time by using a JS framework, however. I want to live in a world where startups can become the next Google, because technology will stagnate when youre trying to protect your fortune, (Look at Apple for fucks sake) but innovation is born of small people with big ideas.
I have a feeling the hate for JS is coming from fear of abandoning what you're already doing. You don't have to do that. JS is only another option (And a very good one, which is why it's becoming so popular).
As for my personal opinion from my experiences... I've left this part til the end on purpose. I love programming and learning and creating, so I've never hated a lamguage, really. It all depends on what I want to do. In the times i've played arpund with JS, I've loved it. Very very easy. The idea of having it on both ends of web development makes a lot of sense too, no conversion, just direct communication. I would imagine this really helps with speed, as well. I wouldn't use it in a complicated system, though. Small things, medium size projects: perfect. Running a bank? No.
So what do you think about this JSUniverse?13
I am fucking so pissed off that I can't even write this.
So my employer, a name next to Apple and Google, held a party. A motherfucking huge party at a very renowned hotel of the city.
I being an introvert was not fucking interested but went for experience.
Dickheads all around. Ass stinking crowd and extreme frivolous stuff going on.
Fucktards had the courage get on stage and perform like singing dancing and comedy act stereotyping men. What the dog fucking hell???!!!!
And that's when I saw my crush. Damnnnn!!!!
I lost my shit. Period.
I could never fucking expect that from her in my wildest dream.
Problem is not the world. It's fucking me. I am an undiluted asshole.
I am not ashamed to ask for help. I am emotionally unstable and I need support. A shoulder to cry on.
I hate why god created me different. I cannot take this shit anymore.
I am shivering. Managed to reach home. Want to cry. Yes, I am grown up adult but this world isn't for me.
People are stupid. All of them are fucking narcissists. Every single dickhead dog.
Selfies and cheap acts. Wow!!! Is this all you got? Maan take that spoon and dip it in hot chocolate being served and shove up your god dammnnnnn asss.
Let me tell you, I went through a breakup of 2 years of relationship and it was terrible. I had mental issues since then. Nobody cared. The reason was me. I am an asshole. Stinking shit.
I couldn't take it. Fuck me in the arse.
Mother nature works in a mysterious way. I don't know what's happening with me.
I feel good in serving others. I did charity on the way back to feel good. But, People around are narcissists and I feel I am born at wrong time or maybe I should quit.
Unless I am emotionally stable I won't be able to pursue my dream. I will put all my projects on hold. I am angry and full of bad vibes.
I can motivate the crap out of anybody but today is not my day. I am done here.
All I need is a shoulder to cry, a person to hug and a soul who understands and trusts me.
Maybe a good night sleep will cure my heart ache.
I am sorry for everything. I just peace and some alone time for the things are not meant for me and I am not meant for this time.
Good night world. See you all tomorrow ☮
I love devRant community for you are the only people who understand me.43
Laravel is the worst framework ever.
Everything has to be made convenient and easy. That sounds amazing, because developers want to save time, worry less about boilerplate code, right? No more constructors, no more dependency injection, fuck all the tedious OOP shit... RIGHT?
It does one thing well: Make PHP syntax uniform and concise through easily integrated libraries such as Collection and Carbon. But those are actually not really part of the framework... just commonly integrated and associated with Laravel.
The framework itself is completely derailed: You can define code in a callback in the routes file. You can define a controller in the routes file. You can define middleware as a parameter to the route, as a fluent method to the route, you can stack them up in a service provider. Validators can be made in controllers, Request objects, service providers, etc. You can send mail inline, through Mailable objects, through Notification objects, etc.
Everything is macroable, injectable, and definable in a million different places. Ultimate freedom!
Guess what happens when you give 50 developers of various seniority a swiss army knife?
One hammers in a screw with a nail file, the other clips the head from the screw using scissors, and you end up with an unworkable mess and blunt tools.
And don't get me started about Eloquent, the Active Record ORM. It's cute for the simple blog/article/author/comment queries, but starts choking when you want more selective and performant queries or more complex aggregates, and provides such an opaque apple-esque interface which lets people think everything is OK, when in reality it's forcing the SQL server to slowly commit suicide.37
What the actual fuck apple?
The SSD is soldiered on the new macbook "pro"?
Drives fail you know, and that thing costs an arm and a leg and even a fuckin liver or two.11
The shortcut for opening chrome history on mac is ⌘Y
Why the fuck would anyone do this? Because when I want to open history, the first letter that comes to my mind is Y obviously.
Also, why is downloads J? Who comes up with these shortcuts?15
Me: Great iOS app is only 20MB shouldn't take long to upload!
I cried T_T7
WHY DA FUCK DO I HAVE TO DOWNLOAD 4+ GB EVERY SINGLE TIME I HAVE TO UPDATE X-FUCKING-CODE? A goddamn patch would be more than sufficient.7
FUCK YOU APPLE.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR NEED OF MY FUCKING VISA.
FUCK YOU APP STORE.
Why the fuck can’t I update any fucking app? Fuck your pigs incest company.
Think different my ass.7
Spent 6 days, trying to get a navbar to stick in my iOS webapp while scrolling, no way to get it done.
This morning I installed iOS update 11.3, problem solved without changing a single line of CSS...
FUCK YOU APPLE5
FUCK THE GOOGLE PLAY REVIEW TEAM.
FUCK THEIR BOT GENERATED EMAILS.
FUCK THEIR DEVELOPER SUPPORT.
I am trying to launch a fucking action game. There will be fucking guns and muzzle flashes shown in the screenshots. Stop fucking rejecting the app. There is no blood in the icon or screenshots. Stop sending me bot generated emails and tell me what content is being flagged.
A little information on the whole scenario: My game was rejected so immediately I contacted the support as to what was the issue. The guy told me 2 screenshots were flagged because they had the muzzle flashes and damage indicator (call of duty type which tells the direction from where the bullets are coming from). So I removed the screenshots and still the game was rejected. FUCK THESE ASSHOLES. SAME GOES FOR APPLE.10
The list would be quite long.
I think Google is still making good tools, but just like Apple the integrations get all so tight and constricting... And with their data, if it goes wrong, it will go wrong hard.
I feel like YouTube is gliding into a state where cheap clickbait floats to the top and finding quality gets more difficult as well, their algorithm is more and more tuned to choose recent popular stuff over good older gems.
Microsoft is all pretend lovey dovey cuddling open source, but I'm still suspicious it's all a hug of death. I was never a big fan, but they're seriously dropping balls when it comes to windows-as-a-service, taking away so much personal control from end users even though they can't be trusted to babysit either.
Amazon is creeping it's way through the internet, charging $10/m to join the vip club infesting houses with spytubes to sell more plastic crap. Bezos' only right to keep wasting oxygen is BlueOrigin, but he'll probably fuck that up as well turning spaceflight into a decadent prime consumer orgy instead of something inspiring.
Facebook... Well, that's self explanatory. Fuck it, everything it pretends to be, and everyone who still has an account with a rusty spike.
Uber and AirBnB, with their fake ass mission of a green shared economy, but they trample over employees, customers and neighbors to build their ivory towers of progressive illusions.
Then there's a million declining brands.
I liked Skype for example when it was first released, Just like how I started out liking (and then hating) Discord, Slack, etc... They're all tools which seem fast and easy, but then they get us further away from solid protocols, get us entrenched into limiting, bloated and sometimes even dangerous tools. As my dad used to say: "Companies are like women, if you go for cheap, fast and easy you'll end up with a burning dick and half your savings gone"
You know what, fuck all tech companies.
OK, devrant is still pretty nice... For now.9
My iPhone can't turn on after being off for 10 days. Tried everything.
Fuck you Apple. Its 21st century. My nokia from 10+ years still can charge.12
Fuck YOU Xcode!
20 crashes since I started working this morning.
Restarted the iMac, same shit.
Cleared NVRAM/PRAM whatever its called, same shit.
Closed EVERYTHING, restarted iMac again, unplugged from the wall, left it few mins, replugged back, turned it on, continued working, AND IT STILL KEEPS FUCKING ME OUT OF NOWHERE.
FUCK THIS, FUCK XCODE, FUCK APPLE, AND FUCK WHOEVER DARES TO THINK THAT ITS A GREAT PIECE OF SOFTWARE, im done.
P.S. this rage got me to a point where i had to make this paper13
TL;DR: Fuck you Apple.
10:30 PM, parent needs iPhone update to update Messenger. How hard can this be?
Need to update iPhone from 9.x to latest, which is so outdated it still required iTunes. Fk.
Boot iTunes on Windows 10 pc that is at least 10 years old.
Crash in task manager
Launch and is completely unresponsive. (Also starts playing unrequested music.. Oh joy..)
Fuck this, go to apple.com to download iTunes exe
Gives me some Microsoft store link. Fuck that shit, just give me the executable
Google “iTunes download”. click around on shitty Apple website. Success.
Control panel. Uninstall iTunes. (Takes forever, but it works)
Restart required (of fucking course).
2 eternities later. Run iTunes exe. Restart required. Fk.
Only 1 eternity later. Run iTunes, connect iPhone.
Actually detects the device. (holy shit, a miracle)
Starts syncing an empty library to the phone. Ya, fuck that.
Google. Disable option. Connect phone. Find option to update.
Update started. Going nowhere fast. Time for a walk at 1:00 AM punching the air.
Come back. Generic error message: Update failed (-1). Phone is stuck installing update. (O shit)
1x hard reset
2x hard reset
Google. Find Apple forum with exact question. Absolutely useless replies. (I expected no less)
Google recovery mode. Get into recovery mode.
Receive message: “You can update, but if it fails, you will have to reset to factory settings”. Fuck it, here we go.
Update runs (faster this time). Fails again. Same bullshit error message. (Goddammit, fuck. This might actually be bad.)
… It boots latest iOS version. (holy shit, there is a god)
Immediately kill iTunes. Fuck that shit.
Parents share Apple account
Sign in, 2FA required.
Fat finger the code.
Restart “welcome” process.
Will not send code. What. The. Fuck.
Requests access code on other parent’s iPhone.
No code present. What???
Try restarting welcome process again. No dice. (Of course)
Set code on other parent’s iPhone.
Get message “Code is easy to guess”. Ya. IDGAF
Use code on newly updated iPhone. Some success.
Requires reset of password.
Password cannot be the same as old password (Goddammit)
Welcome process done.
Sign in again on same phone after welcome process done in settings. (Nice.)
Sign in again on other phone with updated password
Update hangs. Needs more space.
Update frozen in App Store (Really??)
Update complete past 2. Well that was easy.
Apple, fuck you.
Some call Android unintuitive, but I look at the settings app on iPhone and realize you aren’t any better.
This company hasn’t been innovative since 2007. Over 1000 USD for a phone? Are you fucking kidding me?
Updating an iPhone from iOS 9.x is probably uncommon anymore. But this is a fucking joke. Fix your shit.
Shit like this is why I’ll never again own an Apple product. I have HAD IT with the joke of a business.
Thanks for reading.25
So... Just overheard a conversation at an Apple store...
The customer gets furious for not getting to buy a mac pro for the price he wants and it doesn't even include the monitor there.....
C - customer, S - Sales person.
C: Hey, I've heard that apple released new home computers. May I get one?
S: Hello, they are not out yet.
C: WHAT?! How can they not be out yet? They released it like a week ago.
S: Well, they announced it, not officially released it for sale.
C: Ah, whatever. Can I pre-order it now?
S: Sure, we'll need your details and a deposit.
C: What? A deposit for what? That $1000 machine?
S: Sir, do you know the prices?
C: Of course. They have released a new machine and it will cost like previous ones - from $1000.
S: Then you might be talking about Macbook Air...
C: *Interrupts* No, I'm talking about the desktop computer, the whole box.
S: Ok... It starts at ~$6000.
C: WHAT?! It can't be... Oh well, I'll buy it. I hope it's the fully-specked one. Oh and does it come with a monitor?
S: No sir. It's the base model and it has no monitors.
C: WHAT?! How can this be?
S: You see, these are devices created for professionals. They are not for home users since our iMac line is....
C: *Interrupts again* Are you saying I'm not a professional?
S: I'm sorry but by the questions and lack of information - it seems to be true - you are not a professional.
C: FUCK YOU, I'm going to another store and they will sell it for me for $1000. What a piece of crap is this.
*Customer leaves furiously*
S: *to another S* - What is wrong with that dude? Is he high or what?
S2: *shrugs* and tells that it's the 5th time someone came to order that pc and was scared by the price.
So yeah... It's fun to see how idiots think that anything apple releases is for them... Once again I was made sure that apple fans are brainless fucks that will buy anything it produces and if that is not in the right price - they'll get furious.
ps. I own apple product, mac pro 2015. Would never buy a newer one NOR an iphone. I don't think that anyone is dumb just for buying it - people buy whatever fits their needs and that's ok but... More than we would like to admit - people buy it because it's an apple product....28
People giving Xcode bad reviews for being english only.
Stay the fuck away from development if english is a problem for you! 🤬
I'm already annoyed by the translation craze everywhere in development.
At least Apple remains sane in that regard.16
Tomorrow will be the FOURTH FUCKING DAY spent trying to get this piece of shit iOS simulator to not crash the app.
I’VE TRIED EVERYTHING.
FUCK APPLE. FUCK XCODE. FUCK IOS😠😤😠😤😠😤😠😤😠😤
Steve Jobs was a twat, and the IPhone X garbage piece of technology13
Started working on a pihole alternative a while ago.
I like pihole a lot but one of the features I am missing is to be able to define a list of mass surveillance related domains (Snowden leaks; PRISM program and such) and show statistics based on dns queries containing blacklisted domains, prases/words and surveillance-related domains/words (google/facebook/microsoft/apple etc).
Started working on one based on an existing (php based) dns server which is open source and slowly but surely developed something which worked.
Then, I found out that the php resolving function (dns resolving) uses the system default, which can, of course, be google's dns as well. Changing this would be ideal but while the documentation suggested that it could be done some way, it didn't work for me so I chose a library which can do it with specific dns servers (to use as external dns servers).
This library used a different way of showing the retrieved dns query results and really wasn't in for converting everything by hand so i kinda quit the project a while ago.
A few days ago I thought fuck it and started again.
Now have a working version based on the new dns resolving library and made some other good improvements.
For those who are wondering why I chose PHP for this: why the fuck not?
Happy happy happy.18
Brace yourself, organs are going on the black market for the iPhone X.
I haven’t seen the keynote yet, but $2,000 for a phone, seriously this fucker better be making me coffee in the morning, if I have to sell my fucking kidneys and right leg to buy this one.
Ooh it offers a Face ID, cool so now I can stick a photo up at the camera and unlock my phone - security!!
It’s got a wireless charger***, sort of, still needs a useless ugly fucking charging pad .
And they’re even nice enough to put those shitty ear pods in the box.
Fuck you apple, I think it’s time I jumped off this over priced band wagon.57
Disclaimer: I have a strong hate towards apple for multiple reasons and this will only be temporary. (thank God for that)
My oneplus one is battery dead and the power button quit as well. Repair costs would be as expensive as buying a new phone (200-300 price range) so searching for a new one.
But, I need a temporary phone in the mean time.
A phone with googled-android is absolutely a no-go. I used to do that sometimes but those were wrong decisions.
So, for the sake of trying, I'm going for a second hand iPhone.
Will be testing how it works for me (never been able to form an opinion on it since iOS 4.2 (iPod touch)) and will also be searching my ass off for a smartphone which supports lineage/rooting (TIPS BETWEEN ABOVES PRICE RANGE ARE VERY WELCOME) because I'm fucking hell not planning on using that (the iPhone) fucker any longer than a month.
Even if I love it over android (highly doubt that), I won't continue using it for very specific reasons.
Wish me luck 😅16
Drivers across Operating Systems.
Windows: What the fuck is any of this? Here's something minimally functional.
Mac: That's not made by Apple, fuck off.
Linux: Here you go, have fun if you're missing functionality!5
"You use a Mac. How cute. You must not know anything about computers, Apple fanboy. Windows is far superior."
"Unix, bitch. Fuck you."
when you're in a iOS programming class and for the 3rd week in a row we aren't coding. I don't give a flying fuck about steve jobs or apple as a company or their philosophy. Im here to code, not for a fucking history lesson.
I get sucked in for 10 minutes through some news article, and my blood is boiling.
I think the platform does not even deserve to exist.
And I didn't think I would ever say that.
I used to be a staunch defender of the free & open internet, even with it's ugly and extreme sides, because I was convinced the good would outshine the evil.
I displayed the Pirate flag with pride on the mast outside of my house, I was intimately involved in the founding of their political party in my country. I was convinced of the power of the internet, I believed it would empower democracy and debate.
So why do simple tweets, even just the ones about technology, incite an endless stream of vile ultranationalist & misogynist hate?
How is it that those who are reasonable get drowned out?
That fucking character limit is a cancer.
The orator's wings are clipped. The richness of language is wilting before our eyes. All that remains are a bunch of caged chickens pecking every argument to death.
I will defend the right to free speech, even when it comes to the most disagreeable and controversial opinions.
But Twitter does not promote free speech. It's poison to free speech.
It's an endless torrent of non sequiturs, which constricts all reason and intellect. It replaces free speech by pretending to have equal value.
I really don't care if you are left or right, socialist or libertarian, globalist or nationalist.
You can argue to me that we should close all borders for immigrants, that Apple makes great products, that genocide has its pros, you could try to convince me that Heineken tastes acceptable (sorry AlexDeLarge), that Linux should be outlawed or that we should really try to bring this Eugenics thing back again.
Just be fucking rational -- and "Rationality implies the conformity of one's beliefs with one's reasons to believe"
You can NOT fit both your beliefs and their supporting reasons in 140 or even 280 characters.
So what's left is just your beliefs.
Stripped of all reason.
Repeat it often enough, keep spewing, keep throwing out incomplete arguments, and you'll train yourself to forego ratio in your convictions completely.
All social platforms should get a forced captcha for every spelling/grammar error, and a 1000 character minimum.
The world would be a slightly better place.7
STOP SHITTING ON PROGRAMMING LANGUAGES.
Now, I'm not talking to the people that don't take it too serious, but rather to people that think their language is superior and others inferior. Why shit on PHP? A lot of stuff is build with this, including devRant. For me, I'd love to learn any languages that has a proper use for me. (With this sentence I'm excluding all exoteric languages, because they are useless) If anyone says, Python is awesome as fuck, yeah, I FUCKING AGREE. Anyone telling me anything is crap, I disagree. If it's that terrible, how do you know about it? If it was never used ever in a project, how can you know its terrible? You can't. Unless you coded that thing yourself.
Next time don't waste your time on shit like that. I AM ALSO LOOKING AT THE HOLY WAR APPLE VS MICROSOFT VS LINUX
STOP WASTING YOUR TIME WITH SHIT LIKE THIS.19
The straw that broke the proverbial camels back.
You all know my story by now. Pretty shitty company with assehole boss. So I'm supposed to be off this week, sure I had one or two things left to do but I was planning on doing them this week anyway, just in my spare time
On Monday, I get an angry phone call.
"Why aren't you in? Someone said you're on holiday?"
"Yeah you knew I was, YOU moved my holiday to this week."
"But the Mac's still aren't working, this site isn't completely finished yet and we have this *ridiculous feature* we need by last year."
"I have spent around 8 hours trying to fix the broken Mac's that you ordered but I'm not an Apple technician so I can only do so much. I'm waiting on client approval for the site and that new feature is insanely difficult and I need some time to do it. I can work on it from here sometimes but it's not going to get any easier."
"*clearly very angry* I asked you to do ONE thing while I was away and that's still not done. Work from home this week and finish everything."
At which point I sat there in disbelief for an hour before searching for a new job.
The fucking audacity is unreal. Now I know I should have finished that one feature but I also need time not spent fixing fucking 10 year old Mac's or redesigning fucking leaflets or telling people how to change a gradient in InDesign.
I am already severely underpaid and already give up my evenings and weekends for this shit. I've given up most of my first fucking week off in almost 7 months for it too!
Fuck. No. Fuck this. I'm out. I'm taking a shitty job somewhere else as a junior where I can actually learn and enjoy my fucking job.6
GAAAH, APPLE, WHY CANT YOU BE NORMAL!?
I have a bunch of flac files which I wanted to copy over to my iPhone. I read that iOS 11 introduced flac support, so I import my albums into iTunes and... wait, they aren’t importing?
Turns out that THESE MOLDY-BRAINED THUNDERCUNTS DID NOT IMPLEMENT FLAC SUPPORT INTO ITUNES, DESPITE IPHONES ALREADY SUPPORTING THE FORMAT. What the fuck?
So I decide to convert the flacs into alacs, which is apples own FOSS lossless codec. Surely, it must work, it’s Apple. The alacs import into iTunes just fine. So I sync my library. It won’t sync. It tells me that the format cannot be played on my iPhone.
I am FUCKING STEAMING AT THIS POINT. Honestly, I think this is intentional design, because if it isn’t, then this is a MAJOR FUCKUP.
Eat glass shards, developers at Apple.17
I'm using AppLoader, a tiny app with only one thing to do: Upload IPA (app) file to your servers, please explain WHY THE FUCK IT TOOK 4.5GB RAM TO DO A SIMPLE TASK!
Dafuq is wrong with these guys -.-6
So I'm going to get married next june. I made an app for the guests where they have all information available, can send music wishes and can share images of the wedding with other guests.
Here is my story on publishing it in the App Store:
Me: "Hey Apple, I made a small app for my wedding. Mind putting it in your store?"
Apple: "Yeah, whatever" *publishes it*
One month later:
Me: "I made really small changes, please take this update."
Apple: "Ha no, its not interessting for enough people." *rejects it*
I panic, because the app is mentiont in the invites to the wedding which are already printed.
So one day later:
Me: "Ok ok, I added a button in the intro where people can send me a mail if they are interested in using the same app for their wedding."
Apple: "That changes everything! We will accept the update."
I'm happy, that they accepted it in the end, but really?!? There are so many shit apps in the store, why do you reject any not-fart app, because it is not interesting enough??? And why the fuck do you accept it in the first place?15
A day of an iOS developer life:
1. XCode crashed
2. XCode freeze
3. XCode "Jump to Definition" takes me to a different file that has the exact same variable name instead of jumping to the top of the file
4. XCode Storyboard designer throwing 1000000000 as UIStackView width on a newly created UIView
5. Heart attack
6. Lots of depression
just noticed devRant web has xcode as placeholder in the tags box lol devRant knows my pain T_T8
The new MacBook Pro with touchbar is ABSOLUTELY SHITE.
I can't tell you how many times I have accidentally touched the escape key with my pinky while typing. Also accidentally touched "send" while in apple Mail halfway through writing something.
Apple clearly did no user testing with this as I have googled around and many folk are having the same frustrations.
I've just typed a massive note into jira and towards the end my pinky hit the escape key and I lost everything!!
FUCK CUNT BASTARD WANK!!!12
IPod didn't sync well on my Linux machines so decided to give windows - in a highly isolated environment disconnected from the Internet behind a firewall and sandbox - a shot with itunes.
- during the installation it wouldn't detect the fucking harddrive multiple times (genuine unlicensed copy) and after the 4-5th time it's random-fuckingly recognized out of fucking nowhere; I didn't change shit.
- crashes (blue screen and freezes) multiple times during the installation, multiple retries and suddenly it works(?!)
- it took about 10 minutes (!!!!!!!) to install 10+ drivers for an iPod and an external hdd:
Installing Apple iPod drivers... Done
Installing seagate drivers... Done
Installing apple iPod drivers... Done
Installing seagate drivers... Done
Installing Apple iPod drivers... Done
Installing seagate drivers... Done
Installing Apple iPod drivers... Done
Installing seagate drivers... Done
Installing Apple iPod drivers... Done
WHY INSTALL THOSE FUCKERS 5 FUCKING TIMES?!
- iTunes installation fails multiple times without error code (unknown error occured, restoring to original state...),just said fuck it and clicked the shortcut after the ***th fail and it works just like this, THANKS FOR NOTIFYING ME (NOT)!
- iTunes has to restore the entire ipod, this was done with iTunes in the store I bought it already, thanks for nothing.
-restore takes 30+ minutes?!
-syncs the iPod 3 times afterwards.
*clicks close button*
*are you sure you want to quit? Sync in progress*
*oh shit, cancels*
*tries to import media library*
*seagate hdd suddenly not detected*
I'm fucking tired of this bullshit, windows and iTunes can go die in a fucking corner after getting ass raped while their genitals are being scraped off layer by fucking layer and dipped into fucking acid.18
“There’s too many Firefox quantum rants...”
Lemme let you in on a little secret:
It’s nothing new, get over it.
Apple released a new phone.
Samsung or Google releases a phone.
Do any of you see a common theme? It’s the same people posting three metric fuck tons of posts about recent news. Wow, a tech person sharing tech news, imagine that. It’s just a phase, we all notice it. It’ll go away. Thanks. Have a nice day.13
The newest IPhone (Which specwise is good) is more expensive than the newest graphics cards that are coming out... h.o.l.y. s.h.i.t
and you know what? THE BEST MODEL IS 400 BUCKS MORE EXPENSIVE THAN A FUCKING 2080TI!
And you know what?
WHATS UP WITH STORAGE!
you go from 64Gb to 256 and 512 GIGABYTES OF DATA!!
Its like, Midrange storage to a Ton of Storage to HOLY SHIT WHO NEEDS THIS MUCH?!
and you know WHY they are doing this?
Because most of the people will buy the 256 or 512 model GUARANTEED! People behave like this! you dont believe me?
What if you gave a Big Popcorn box for 15 Bucks and the smallest one for 5 bucks, which one would you buy? The smaller one. (Most of the time) and why? because you only have 2 choices! If I gave you 3 choices: 5 for small, 10 for medium and 15 for large?
You wont buy the smallest one, because it doesnt make sense! THATS WHY AND NOW FUCK OFF AND YOU TOO APPLE GO SUCK COCKS OF YOUR FUCKING FANBOYS WHICH WILL PAY MORE!6
Apple flips the bird to devs again...
So I go to release a new version of my app (critical updates and bug fixes from mgmt) and I had just updated my phone. Yeah, that was a fucking mistake.
“This version of Xcode is not compatible with the new version of iOS.”
Ok... update Xcode...
“The new version of Xcode is not compatible with your version of OSX”
WTF?! This version isn’t that old? Fine... update OSX. 5 hours later...
“Hey, just wanted to let you know that we decided to break every one of your web development tool setting and basically nothing works on your computer now, oh yeah, and we’re Apple so FUCK YOU.”11
Apple you drove of delusional suckers! When will your retarded fashion devices finally support WEBP?!
A gallery page with images, and thanks to WEBP, it's 408 kB. Because Google made WEBP and handed out a well documented CLI FOSS compression tool that even can convert the source PNGs to lossy WEBP with bloody transparency. Well done, Google!
Except that Apple's shitty management can't take it that Google actually made something nice, so no WEBP. Instead, JPEG-2000 that enjoys nearly no fucking tool support. The free tools that even can deal with that mostly don't support transparency, and the encoder sucks donkeys so that JPEG still fucks JPEG-2000 big time.
So it's JPEG with matching background for iOS. Fine, but since JPEG's blocky artifacts are much more visible, the compression can't be that high, and it's 769 kB. That's 88% more image data for Shittari than for non-retarded browsers and even Edge! EDGE!!
Oh and if the user changes light/dark system mode according to surrounding light conditions, guess what happens? Yep, since JPEG doesn't support transparency, now it's different JPEGs with dark background via the media query in the "picture" element, and it's another 754 kB download. Bloody 1523 kB instead of 408 kB, that's a factor of 3.7!
Fuck your ass Crapple, with an electric eel!19
I know posts like this one don`t belong here but I`m so super proud of it...
I`ve finally (after like 2 days) finished setting up my macbook-air-arch-linux-kde-plasma and this is what it looks like. If any of you is interested I can share some details about making certain things compatible with apple hardware.
Why the fuck would iTunes or any product from Apple (or anywhere) care what Outlook is doing or if it's even there?!?
I have no settings, add-ons, mods, apps, or anything that would justify this!
And it came TWICE in a single update installation!!!11
Dear Apple, fuck you for the iPad pro, it is probably the hardest device to do web design in mind.
It is at that point where it's screen is technically declared laptop size but just too big for being declared tablet...
SWIFT!!!!! I understand that you're a relatively new language so I forgave you for all of your wrong doings..BUT WHAT THE FINGER IS THIS SHIT YOU HAVE IMPLEMENTED IN YOUR STRING DATATYPE? WHY THE FUCK CAN'T YOU FORM A CHARACTER FROM AN EMPTY STRING? AND WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK HAPPENED TO THE SUBSCRIPT OPERATOR? WHY NOT JUST ADOPT THE "\0" AS OTHER LANGUAGES? But NOOOOO...We're Apple we'll not adopt it..I WAS UNDER THE IMPRESSION THAT STUPIDITY AND LUCK OF INNOVATION RAN IN THE IPHONE TEAM BUT APPARENTLY ITS EVERYWHERE..Its annoying because the String datatype is one of the most common and basic data types so the last thing you expect is this shit..APPLE........SERIOUSLY AND SINCERELY FUCK OFF4
not me ranting but it's a funny story about a rant
So I work on an Android app, that was literally copied from ios code, because the ios app development started 1.6 years earlier (business decision)
You have developers copying swift code to java, and the app is crap, full of bugs... I am the newest addition to the team so I'm currently cleaning up this mess.
Anyway, the ios app works perfectly, the Android app however has litterally 0 crash-free users.
So all of a sudden, one day at the office, I hear my fellow ios dev screaming " what the fuck, you retarded peace of shi?! this is fucking nonsense".
I'm like , guys, can someone re-boot him please? Wtf happened? (everyone laughing)
It turns out someone posted a review on apple store, 1 star, complaining that the app doesn't work on Android, and now the rating on Google play is higher than that on apple store.
He gets upset about it every day, and I'm like... fuck it, I'm not fixing no bugs if they go complain on apple store!!! 😂 And then he goes ranting about it again.3
iOS 11 you buggy piece of shit!
Layouts breaking all around, can’t figure out if it’s in landscape or portrait mode, lock menu disapearing, minimizing apps breaks them...
Oooh, you invented a GENIUS NEW option to turn mobile data on from launch control, but WiFi and Bluetooth buttons don’t turn these off, but disconnect from current network... WHOSE SMART ASS IDEA WAS THAT? BURN IN UX HELL ASSHOLE!
Haven’t seen a worse update since Vista...6
FOR FUCK SAKE APPLE! HOW THE HELL ARE YOU STILL IN THIS WORLD!
Was creating a signed file of the app to upload to their store and while XCode (that bitch!) was working on it, Slack, and Postman crashed!
Do I need to say why or you already knew it is because XCode ate all the RAM -.-7
After 8 iTunes Testflight Beta approvals for my app ... better still, I got hte app approved for the App Store a week ago to "de-risk" our "final submission" ... That's 9 approvals for my app, and we're ready to submit version 1.0.0 and actually release on the store. We take last week approved app and "developer reject" if to make room for the final tweaked version (minor tweaks, minor bugfixes). Submit version 1.0.0., plenty of time before it needs to be released.
But, what's this? "Meta Data rejected" for v1.0.0 because some piece of shit at Apple wants to watch a video of the app working with our hardware. What about the previous 9 approvals with the demo account connected to the demo hardware?
So we send a video within 1 hour of their unexpected request about the very foundational fucntionality of our app. That was 24 hours ago and these fucking assholes haven't even responded, no sign of when they will trouble themselves to respond. Pure limbo.
All the work up to this point was to "de-risk" their infamously shitty review process and all of it was in vain because it's somehow brand new information that our app works with our hardware.
Holy fuck, what a bunch of power-tripping assholes. All I can do is pace around and review the previous 2 months in my head to figure out what I could have done better. But I could not possibly have expected that after all the Testflight Beta approvals and after the recent App Store approval, that they would suddenly doubt that our software actually works with our hardware!!!!!
FUCK YOU APPLE!!!! FUCK YOU WITH ALL MY HEART!!!!!!2
There's so many posts on here that say fuck apple or Microsoft only real programmers or computer users run Linux. Maybe step back and reflect why these companies got big. Maybe the programmers in their development teams are actually good. Maybe variety and competition and different focuses is good for us and consumers.19
I believed that I had a great eye to details.
I loved detailing myself, it satisfies my soul.
I am also a huge fan of Steve Jobs. Not Apple, but Jobs. I have followed him since launch of iPhone and iPod. Watched and read about him a lot.
He was definitely an asshole but he had great taste in music, powerful business acumen, and amazing sense of design and art at large.
And yet again, the ignorant me missed out another important detail from him.
I always wondered why he named his products as iPhone, iPod, iTouch, iMac, et cetera.
But just yesterday I read somebody mention in comments here that it is camelCase.
HOLY FUCK!!!!! This guy even honoured devs and used camel casing to name some iconic products. Just fucking brilliant.
My life will never be the same.19
TL;DR: No YouTube Music! Fuck you.
Disclaimer: I could use an Adblocker but my old one always crashed and YouTubes Ads are short and not that bad - mostly just banners in the video player.
Rant: Yes google, I AM listening to music on youtube. I am your target audience for YouTube Music. But I am NOT interested.
You see, I wouldn't listen to music on YouTube if I had the spare money for Spotify, Apple Music or some other stupid overpriced service that gives the actual artists not enough of what they charge.
And giving me the same ad over and over again just annoys the fuck out of me. I DON'T WANT FUCKING YOUTUBE MUSIC. I am not interested in a free trial. I am not interested in buying it.
The most stupid thing is that Google provides a dislike and like button for ads. I pressed dislike so often yet it still comes up. GOOD QUALITY!
Why on earth is every fucking big company lost in copying every shit that others make and that has success? Where is my loved innovative Valve?! The innovative Google? They all just crave for fucking money making stuff. As if they still needed more...15
Fuck you Apple. I forgot the headphone dongle for my iPhone at home, so now I can't (1) plug my apple headphones into anything (i.e. my laptop, which is made by the same fucking company) and (2) use any other headphones with my phone. Buying an iPhone was a mistake. Apple has been implementing the shittiest UX recently. Don't even bring up the fucking bezel on the iPhone X or the marketing bullshit that is "retina display". The worst part is the Apple fanboys that act like everything Apple pumps out has been touched by the hand of God—Tim Cook could show up at their house and kill their fucking dog right in front of their eyes and they'd worship Apple for doing it.14
Fuck Apple sideways! (Wait for it, the original part begins)
HOW can a company that keeps on boasting about UX, to the point that last WDC they took more time speaking about a fucking kaleidoscope animation for their watch then about the whole changes to their MacBook's hardware, even consider putting that turd of a remote on market.
If you have an Apple Store in reach, I invite you to get up, flush, and go there. Try that atrocity that is the AppleTV, and laugh at how incredibly bad it is. Then do your best to refrain from burning the place down in your inevitable rage, that might cause you legal issues.
The previous AppleTV was fine, it was practically useless, but usable. But for some reason they decided a touchpad with low precision and no gestures was a good idea to put on a remote to a thing that will, due to its target audience, most likely be plugged into a fancy TV that has a 300ms lag due to fancy image processing. That thing gives no feedback, appart from visual, has so little precision that in a movie, the smallest step I've achieved was 5 fucking minutes, while being really fucking careful not to spoil the movie.8
I started working in a company where they use scala/akka stack, that requires a huge amount of hw resources to compile and debug, so my boss bought me a new laptop: a MacBook Pro. I came from a Dell with Linux Fedora, and now:
FUCK YOU APPLE YOUR COMPUTERS ARE SO SHITTY
JUST EXPLAIN ME WHY THE FUCKING KEYBOARD IS SO A PIECE OF SHIT WITH THE FUCKING COMMAND KEY
FUCK YOU COMMAND KEY
FUCK YOU MAC OS WITH YOUR SHITTY POLICIES YOU CAN'T INSTALL THIS PROGRAM BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO ENABLE UNKNOWN RESOURCES
FUCK YOU BREW AND BREW CASK WHAT THE FUCK OF TWO SHOULD I USE
FUCK THE STUPID TOUCHBAR I WANT THE FUCKING ESC, DELETE, F1, F2 AND SO ON
FUCK YOU APPLE YOUR MAC IS FRAGILE AS FUCK I CAN'T THROW THAT FROM THE FIFTH FLOOR OF MY BUILDING LIKE A THINKPAD
FUCK YOU SAFARI THAT YOU DON'T REFRESH THE PAGE WITH F5
I have a small gif for you just to explain how much shitty is Mac OS17
Yes - I fucking hate xcode too.
These are the main reasons:-
(1) Why the fuck make people go into Terminal to run pod install to build something? this is absurd.
(2) There are always fucking problems with the provisioining profile - like wrong fucking profile, or expired profile - which fuck wit came up with such a convoluted way of deploying? and then you to have to login to the apple develope and agree to some new fucking terms with some other bull shit crap.
(3) Swift 4 is out when nobody has been learnt swift 3.... What the fuck??
You know a company is ripping you off when they charge £79 for a fucking charger and it breaks in 1 year. Fuck you Apple2
Fuck Apple right in the eye hole for trying (and probably succeeding) to normalize phone pricing at hundreds of dollars above the current market. This is going to make Android OEMs follow suit, and the world gets a little shittier for everyone.6
Never EVER buy a Mac as your primary PC if you're a developer.
Back in 2014 I bought an iMac because I already had an iPhone, and being able to code on xCode and also have a Windows partition seemed perfect. It wasn't.
Soon enough, I started encountering issues. My storage was randomly filling up, my computer started getting slow despite me having a small number of start apps and still a lot of storage available, it was all a mess.
So - I installed Windows 10 using Bootcamp to use it as my main OS. All was great until I wanted a new partition of Windows so I can test some things out without damaging my stuff. I try multiple methods, none of which work because my disk is not in the right partition format, and I don't want to change it because I'd have to format the whole thing.
Whatever - I give up, and try going back to my normal partition, disappointed. Guess fucking what?! My Windows Boot was damaged! Yes, I shit you not!
So - not only was this absolute piece of shit not able to add just one more fucking partition with an OS on it, but it BROKE my main partition, and now I'm trying to recover it.
I've said it once and I'll say it again: Never EVER get a Mac as your primary computer, unless you only work on Mac/iPhone apps.
For paying 1300$, I was expecting a seamless experience with little to no issues - yet all I got is a computer that's fucking broken from it's very core.
Fuck you, Apple.13
This morning there was this window cleaner again, that actually made me remember a rant from the old box - my previous account. Repost of that coming in an hour or so :3
Turns out that he came in the morning, and I completely forgot about it. The only appointment that I had today got canceled so I was like, eh fuck it. There's been this family event yesterday that made me so fucking tired... I'll just stay in bed for a little while longer.
Apparently that window cleaner ringed my bell multiple times, haven't heard him do it but anyway.. he and the cleaning lady had the genius idea to ask my landlord whether they can just barge in my home. Way to start the day, isn't it? I thought there were burglars.
In my bathrobe and visibly pissed off (I am NOT a morning person!), I let him do the window cleaning and waited for them to get the fuck out already. Then that cleaning lady, the fucking bitch that called my landlord to break into my home without MY prior permission!!! While the window cleaner was doing his work, she proceeds to ask me this.
Cleaning lady: "I had this technical issue earlier, and since you are good with phones I thought I'd ask you."
Me (thinking): oh, here it comes.. *rolling eyes*
M: "What's the issue?"
CL: "Well my stepson has an iPhone, which he broke and we brought it to a smartphone repair shop. They repaired it twice but an hour after receipt of the fixed phone, it breaks again."
M (t): You went wrong at iPhone, and you went wrong at visiting that incompetent mofo "teknishan" twice.
M: "Well I have no experience whatsoever with iPhones, but continue."
CL: "Well, he replaced the motherboard, and some pin at the bottom.."
M (t): The fucking motherboard of all things. The whole fucking motherboard?! The last thing that I'd look at, he just replaces like that?! Fucking piece of shit. That's even worse than Apple stores. And what's up with that goddamn pin? CAN'T YOU POSSIBLY BE A BIT MORE SPECIFIC?!
M: "Given only this information, I have no idea what's wrong with it."
CL: "But you are good with these things, aren't you?!"
M: "I disassemble my own broken phones, and dick around with their motherboards. That, while I'm fully aware that in the process I can break it beyond repair. That does not make me an expert on every phone out there."
Well what did you even expect, fucking bitch. You barge into my home, don't even have the dignity to leave for me to be able to shower and dress myself, and then you go ask shit like that? Go suck my fucking cock, and shove that iPaperweight down your ass!! How about that?!9
Today, my dad can finally ditch his iPhone 4 which is passed down from my eldest sis to my mom and to my dad, all thanks to my brother-in-law getting a Samsung Galaxy J7 on Black Friday.
Finally. No more Apple bullshit in my house!! NO FUCKING MORE!!! *insert hysterical laughter* GOODBYE STUPID 20-PIN CHARGER CABLE~ GOODBYE ITUNES~ GOODBYE ICLOUD~ FUCK YOU!!!7
If you use vagrant, virtualbox and a mac os, don't update to monjave yet. Apple broke it without fix so far. Can't run my homestead 😣13
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU APPLE?! THATS A SIXTH OF MY MOBILE DATA! WHERE IS THIS MUCH USAGE COMING FROM?????8
I recently ranted so much about languages but here it goes
JS we need to talk. BECAUSE YOU GOT FAT AND UGLY STUPID BITCH! Dumb piece of bloatware. What even is your problem? Depending on a library for strpad and then blow up like Steve jobs ego. Bastardized fuckfest. I used to like you bro and then you screw me over!
It's like you fuck my wife while I try to fix your car. Why can't you even be usefully on your own anymore? I'd be richer than bill gates if I get a dollar for every damn framework people pull from their asses. Are you writing this fuck while shitting so you can compare colors of your outcome?
Normalize the fucking base, don't add to the bukkakke! bitch is drowning already. Why is everyone jerking of to react and angular? When have YOU written something in vanilla the last time? Why even bother? Remove the core and hardcore every damn framework into the browsers. Guess that saves you 200kb. Oh wait I forgot that's about unminified jQuery.
Now I need to load about 2GB of dependencies, some creating code that puts code in my code to load code out of my code which was generated out of something that remotely resembles JS so every browser is able to execute my fancy shit. But hey, it's fast. And of course there are the fanboys. You are worse than apple fags. You sample your own jizz with your friends in a wine glass. there was a Time it was bad practice to mix logic and view. Now you made it mandatory. "Browser does the rendering" ofc you imbecile pile of fuck don't show me a damn preloader for 1 picture and 20 lines of text. Who fucked your brain so hard?
So react seems to be the cool kid now, then I tell someone I know angular it's like showing up in a pikachu onsie to a formal dinner with the queen.
I used to love you girl. I loved how we could dirty things together. Now you are like a pig. Please loose weight bby the sight of you disgusts me nowadays2
"iOS Development is easier"
Yeah, right? There's no dropdown, no checkbox, no radio button, no placeholder for multiline textfields, ...
You have to manually do everything yourself and lay things out in their messy slow Xcode. Apple doesn't include important things only because they have randomly decided not to include them! Fuck this job.8
Fuck smartphone companies for bailing on Bluetooth (and NFC) as reliable inter-device ways to transmit data. Fuck Apple for no USB to PC file transfer. Fuck Google and Apple for their walled gardens and failing to make file transfer work over Bluetooth between their systems.
Bluetooth is a teenager with the mental state of a baby. The industry birthed it but failed to raise it to great heights. Seems to me it's fallen to simply being a wireless peripheral device connectivity protocol.
Where are all the cool NFC apps that work? Where is out-of-the-box support for Bluetooth file transfer? (I see you Android and Linux, ty). Why is desktop support for Bluetooth file transfer so awful and unreliable? Why the fuck doesn't BT transfer between Linux and Mac work?
Even between two Android devices of the same manufacturer I couldn't transfer shit over NFC.
P2P Bluetooth mesh networks
Bluetooth file torrenting
Bluetooth encrypted chat that nearby phones can join
BT doc sharing..
Correct me if I'm wrong so I can see the light.9
YOU FUCKING FUCK PIECE OF FUCKING SHIT XCODE I FUCKING WISH YOU DISAPPEAR FROM THIS FUCKED UP WORLD!
What I did:
1. Scroll right on "Magic Mouse"
2. Profit! (XCode crash!)7
Fuck Apple. You'd think at least a Keynote is something that they make available to the plebs, but nah, you need Safari or Edge to watch it. Fuck your fucking proprietary bullshit, you fucking elitist pieces of shit.7
TW: Opinionated rant is opinionated
The entire hype train about wireless bluetooth accessories is running on a shit-engine instead of steam. Holy flying fuck, I hate all things Bluetooth. Call me a fucking starfish for living under a rock or something, but trading functionality for a minor convenience improvement is totally baseless, in my opinion. And wires are not even that much of a bother, are they?
Wireless mouses, wireless keyboards, wireless speakers, wireless headphones, wireless all the things, because fuck you, cables, amirite? Who needs cables, it’s 2019, amirite?
Yes, because I like having to charge my accessories. When I used to have a wireless mouse and keyboard, I was literally inches away from tossing these pieces of hot steaming shitballs out the window every time i had to change the battery. I’d take a cable any day if I had a choice between changing the battery of a fucking mouse every month or so and a simple wired connection.
Oh, and headphones. Yes, I love to charge my wireless Bluetooth headphones every now and then! Of course I do, because it’s trendy! And who cares about the degrading sound quality and latency issues of shitty Bluetooth connections? Compression? Why should I care about how my music sounds, I listen to MP3s anyway, they’re the superior audio format!
Fuck my life. It’s not becoming any better with manufacturers removing headphone jacks. Or making laptops with only 2 USB ports or something because “my trendy wireless accessories don’t need ports! Are you living in the Stone Age or what?”
Bluetooth is a shitstain if a protocol and should be purged from the market. Fuck it, fuck every manufacturer who makes Bluetooth accessories compulsory with a spikey pole in all holes. And most importantly, skin the folks at Apple alive for not FUCKING IMPLEMENTING APTX IN THEIR STUPID PHONES AND STILL PUSHING THEIR WIRELESS AUDIO ACCESSORIES!42
Said it before and saying it again: FUCK YOU XCODE! This shit keeps on crashing 😒
I lost a bet today 😥 ... My surname is inman
I have to name my first born child
The bet? That apple wouldn't reject the app I submitted ... Fuck apple11
There is no technical reason why Microsoft should buy Github, no!
It's the same reason why they bought Skype, LinkedIn and Minecraft and everything else: Money and monopolisation.
That's destructive and an obstacle to progress.
Microsoft, Google, Apple, Facebook: Go fuck yourself!4
Ohhh Apple.... At this point you might as well change your logo to 🖕 with the motto, "Apple, coz FUCK YOU"8
Fucking Apple products fuck xcode fuck all ishit!
Wrapped my views in a UIStackView in storyboard designer and xcode gave it a width of 8,000,000 and height of 3,000,0007
Fucking Apple... my MacBook Pro committed suicide upgrading from High Sierra to Mojave, had to wipe the drive. After much trouble resetting my Apple ID (put the password AND the two-factor code in the password field.. who the fuck thought that up), it tells me Mojave isn't compatible with this computer.
... fine, it's a 2012 machine I can respect that, but you blew away my system to upgrade THIS WAS YOUR IDEA NOT MINE...
...and so I just try to update to El Capitan or something because I'm on FUCKING OSX LION now (swirling galaxy, so sparkle, such stars)
...and the App Store won't let me. Why?
"Software Update Required"
"To make changes to your payment information, you need to upgrade your Mac to the latest version of macOS."
Zoom: Don't worry everyone we'll deploy a work around to stop this venerability while keeping all the functionality in place.
Public: wouldn't it be safer to just remove some of these features? Someone will likely find another way around it.
Zoom: We feel comfortable with our decision and stand by our approach.
Apple: Fuck that - https://techcrunch.com/2019/07/...12
1) Create UI library for iOS and Android with 5000+ stars on GitHub
2) Get noticed by Apple for library and interview and work there
3) Get married to my lovely girlfriend
4) Have kids
5) Fuck all yo truck stops and yo biznatch lisbetan asses1
FFFFFFUUUUUUCCCCKKKKK spent 1hr writing a Quora answer to "Why did Warren Buffet buy Apple not Google" on my phone. Then forgot to copy the text before submitting and lo hand behold...
Ok just for kicks:
-lock in effect
-Apple has a monopoly on i*
-90% of people just need their apps to work and check email, they don't give a fuck about alternative options6
Taking a database class, prof insists on using Microsoft Sql server 2014. "Okay cool" said the Microsoft surface fan boy inside me as I installed it. "Holy shit this is using 6 fucking GBs?? Eh it's okay I trust" again said my Microsoft fanboy self. Finished installing, makes queries and it works. Cool.
Go to run Sql server again next day and get an error (nothing displayed, just a box pop up and then a crash) I use some Google skills. Change a bunch of shit and still it persists. "Just uninstall it and reinstall again" says my prof. I do so except random errors during installation saying Sql already exists even though I just uninstalled it. "Maybe it's some registry keys messing with it!" do some digging, remove unneeded registry keys and try again. Installation finished but a whack of features say failed to install.
I sit and try to work this shit out for the next four hours (not paying attention to my class) and still can't get Sql to completely uninstall itself. I try iobit uninstaller, command line uninstalling, fucking everything but still not working. Slowly my fanboy side is wishing that the windows symbol on the back of my machine was an apple.
I ended up having to backup all my files and reinstalling windows to get it working properly. Holy sweet fuck. The worst part is when this class is done ill probably need to reinstall yet again to save the 6gb it's sucking up. So if you're not sure whether you need something as heavy as Microsoft Sql server or not for your application, don't use it! It's a fucking virus that is super difficult to remove.
Tldr: life long Microsoft fanboy becomes apple convert in a day of using Microsoft Sql server.9
The power of saying fuck you to apple to become a supporter when you have both android and iPhone.5
Fuck safari literally nothing does what it's supposed to do, I have a `document.getElementById('x').innerText = "hello there"` but it sets a totally different element to that text, this is apparently because of display: none although JS should NOT look at css wtf.
There's a whole bunch of these issues but I won't rant about them until I've solved them so I can fully explore the depth of stupidity in safari. If you work for apple and developed WebCore or WebKit, I'm sorry but I hate you and you would be better off shipping with lynx.3
Bought an S9. One thousand times better than an iPhone. Thank fuck. Finally rid of apple after 6 years. Took long enough.19
Went out on a limb and bought an iPhone. It's already causing me problems. Now I have to call fucking apple support. Fuck.13
FUCK FIREBASE, FUCK CLOUD MESSAGING, FUCK GOOGLE, FUCK APPLE, FUCK PUSH NOTIFICATIONS, FUCK PROGRAMMING AND FUCK MY LIFE. JUST TELL ME MOTHERFUCKERS WHY NOTIFICATIONS IS NOT WORKING ANYMORE, I SWEAR I DIDN'T CHANGE A SINGLE LINE OF THE FUCKING CODE. AND IT'S BEEN ONLY ONE WEEK SINCE THE LAST TIME I TESTED IT.5
Sooooo I am not a fanboy. I do have my reservations when it comes to technology and whatever, but I live and let live and normally don't shit on stuff as long as it does not affect me or has any reasonable opportunity to affect others.
But my lead developer does, highly opinionated dude for a lot of shit (he ain't really my lead dev anymore in the sense of him being over me, i actually got promoted to a different department but have to continue working with him) and as such we sometimes go on some huuuuge rants regarding tech. With me, shit is simple man, you tell me you like something and I'll dig it, even if i don't necessarily dig it....i am pretty chill like that...ya dig?
Well the other day he was talking about how tvs like mine were too small for him, mine is a 55 inch, i don't think its small, it doesn't inconvenience me in any way really. But to his royal blindness shit is small.
I mentioned that I watch most of my shit lying down on my ipad pro, to were he starts talking massive amounts of shit about apple.
Now, as a previously hired and annoyed mobile developer, ios has a special place in my heart in which my only complaint about the platform was how xcode would fuck up from time to time. The languages were glorious(Obj C and swift) the cocoa apis were amazing(between ios and mac desktop....oooh la la) and the care that the apple store takes in not letting every other add infested garbage app to play a part in their store, the gloriousness of having your data secured as well as havinf applications compiled into the actual fucking operating system REALLY TOUCHES HOME WITH ME. ITS COOL IF IT AIN'T YOU, I AM TALKING ABOUT ME.
Oh. And ipads are smooth as fuck. This was something that I had to mention when he said that anything that I could do with my 1000+ dllr ipad could be done with his samsung table. Normally, I would be like "cool man" but diz doode insisted on making an android vs ios argument.
He insisted on me trying on his tablet. Boy it was the jankiest, laggiest shit I had laid hands on.......just like any other underpowered Android device. Don't get me wrong, my s9 works fucking amazing, but why in the name of heavens would you make an argument against a tablet whilst simultaneously using a piece of shit that doesn't even work properly? Are people really that delusional in their arguments that they would really be that wrong while still insisting on being right?13
Apple really needs to add a "Deceased" tag to its facial recognition system, I just had a "memory" appear with a full 1:30 minute long video of my Grandmother who passed away earlier this year with "extreme" music in the background1
Okay, just because I like the OS, doesn't mean that I fully condone Apple.
They now have a constant notification that won't go away unless I enable two factor authentication. But here's the problem: I LIVE IN A PLACE WITH NO CELL SERVICE.
Also, I don't want to recieve a notification every time I open up my laptop!
Apple, why the fuck do you think I encrypt my data? So my disk is secure! I fucking can't have my phone on me all the time, I am not a goddamn teenage white girl! (I am a weeb developer)4
This fcktard client that insist on using an iframe and demands support for browsers like IE7. You are costing me years of my life.
Fucking fuck of a Microsoft trying to protect people against tracking from 3d parties in an iframe in random ways in some versions of IE7. Or IE11 in IE7 compatibility mode.
If you are going to refuse sessions just do it! I got a fucking check and fix for that. Because these fuck faces friendly people at Apple like to refuse sessions on iPads and iPhone too. But we worked that out, because they are at least consistent. So a few dirty little hacks made it all Okay.
But no, Boo Hoo I'm Microsoft and I will throw a tantrum. I like my browsers to be like an magican, instead of an usefull piece of software. If you look in this page, or look here we got them. I got your sessions, safe and secure.
But when you need me, to verify that the user is allowed to access data we do a little hocus pocus and now they are gone. Nowhere to be seen or found again. Fun times free fucking magic shows all day long.
It's morning but maybe its time for a bottle of scotch. Maybe if I'm in the state as this browser. Where I don't know what I'm doing because I'm shitfaced drunk it will start working.
When in Rome do as the romans do.6
Recently I've had some Airpod knockoffs in the mail for about €8 while they were in a promotion. They are pretty usable, and while I do not own the authentic Airpods, my unit seems to have all its most important functions that I'd expect of a pair of Bluetooth earbuds (given that I've been using those since 2015 already, so plenty of experience with such things). Given that, the Apple Airpods'd better give me a morning blowjob for their price!
Seriously, what is the point of such Apple earbuds. For me, the important thing is that they are wireless earbuds that can operate independently or in sync as desired. It's earbuds that can be recharged on the go using some kind of portable 3.7V lithium cell in a charging dock that can directly drive the 3.7V cells in the earbuds. That's all.
Bill of materials? 2 tiny Bluetooth controllers, 2 speaker drivers, ABS injection moulding for the charger pocket thingy and the earbuds themselves, a charge controller for the "docking station", and some tiny lithium cells for each, provisioning size-capacity for whatever will still fit. That's all.
Is that worth €150? Like hell it is. And sure some capacitive sensor in the earbud for touch-based control would be useful. But guess what, even that isn't expensive! Capacitive sensing is dirt easy (https://youtu.be/mWR9Q_pTagw), and for something like the Airpods you could probably get away with 3-4 stationary capacitive touch sensor modules. Cost of that per unit if I were to design it and outsource it to China? €15 at best. Yet Apple charges €150-something for their Airpods. What the fuck?!8
!dev but rant
Samsung!! What the fuck is wrong with you?
Some longer time ago you earned forst red red flag called knox. What the fuck you mean there is physical diode in phone that will burn out when I do whatever I want with phone? Its my phone. My. I live in europe and european law is with me. Its **MY** stuff and Im allowed to be super user so fuvk off with knox bullshit.
Okay, now, more and more phone are missing critical feature to save few cents a phone. You were last bastion. You were **that** company who was loyal to audio jacks. And why the fuck you plan to remove it? You know what? That one thing brought your phones from one of best (becouse retained audio jacks and didnt do much of notch fuckupery) to literally worst one thanks to knox.
And before anyone tells me bullshit apple tried to say "thats space saving", no its not true to point where one of their very own Iphones had internally space and traces for audio jacks. Its to save pennies on phone for profit margins and to force us to use bluetooth stuff, that I dislike. I stick to my K518 few years now and I am super happy user of it. Why y'all want to take away good stuff?
Oneplus, your turn. Why the luving fuck your big bulletpoint of marketing was "yes, we will keep loyal to audio jacks" and later down the line you shown one big fat middle finger to all users.
Goos job, guys, well fucked up.
So any good modern alternatives for my OnePlus 5 when it becomes obstole in few years? Nope. Fuck nope.
OP7 pro is awesome but no audio jacks absolutely kills off this phone in my eyes to level of not existance and inability to be considered.17
When your manager casually mentions that you're(me) going to learn developing apps for iOS, when you obviously have a built in hate for Apple.
You just sit there thinking about how the fuck the situation escalated unexpectedly quick.7
Motherfuck! God I hate xcode worst development environment ever conceived! Have to update it right now to be able to push to my device. Fucking appstore is the worst program ever. How about telling your users what the fuck is going on instead of just sitting there displaying a flash load circle. Gaaaaaahhh I wanted to go home 2 hours ago. Fuck you apple and all you stand for may you rot in the deepest crevices of he'll for all eternity! Fuuuuuck8
Started a new job today.
They gave me a Mac.
Why in actual fuck is there no shortcut for the terminal? Took me half a day to get an iterm hotkey working only to find out it only works if you have a terminal open already.
Stupid apple. I want my mod+enter back.8
Fuck you apple, and fuck your god damn shitty documentation.
Working with NFC enabled passes, their documentation says "payload max is 64 bytes"
What they ACTUALLY fucking mean is 64 ascii characters.
Also, the way they handle date time formats is fucked. They say they support W3C formats (iso) but what they actually mean is, they support a half assed version of a subset of it.
I told their chief engineer over a phone call and his response;
"I agree, our documentation is lacking"... HOW ABOUT YOU FUCKING UPDATE IT!
Also, how they handle json is just bad.7
Fuck Apple Two-Factor Authentication.
I am a developer with multiple accounts and this two-factor authentication is a fucking joke! I spoke to this idiot on the line who told me that I had to create an administrator on my computer to login to a developer account of mine. I hung up the phone and told her to "Fuck Off"
It's a fucking waste of time. Apple has not had an innovation since Steve Jobs died; each upgrade does nothing new compared with the last one. What's new things are there between 10.14 and 10.8??? Nothing. Except it's a lot fucking slower.7
Mac suddenly stopped working. Came to know motherboard is gone & the price to get it changed is around 60k.
Fuck you Apple. Never buying the shit again. Though one good thing came out of it ;it used to be my work machine too & now I'm chilling from last 4 days.13
People ranting about xcode, how about stop using Mac and apple products there all dog shit. Or just use another IDE or editor problem solved.10
Why the fuck is this apple stuff so fucking expensive?
I want to dig into IOS app development but I am seriously considering not to do it because it's fucking expensive...
I am a young dev (in apprenticeship) and my company offered me a phone. That's great because I can save the money that I would have payed for my phone bill.
But sadly it's an iPhone... I thought why not make something cool out of it and start learning IOS development.
But so far all I saw from IOS development are extreme high costs...
Is there some kind of student plan or anything that makes it cheaper to learn?
Can you guys give me any advice on this?
I own an old MacBook but I need a new OS on it... (long story)
Are there anymore hidden costs? Any tips where to start?
Thanks for your help fellow ranters and sorry for the half rant half question12
Follow up on my previous Apple's poor sense of design's post (https://devrant.com/rants/1347862/...)
I posted this on other platform and had a reasonably good response from on of the users, as to why Apple does this.
The fucking defective Caps Lock on Apple keyboards drives me fucking ballistic!
WHY would they ever think it would be a good idea to introduce a minimum press time for a key?!?
EVERY. FUCKING. TIME. I use the damn thing it inevitably fails and I have to backspace, delete the non-caps text I just entered after HITTING THE FUCKING CAPS LOCK KEY, tap the damn thing again (harder this time) and try again. It usually takes 2 or 3 tries before it actually catches. I'm sorry, but training myself to type slower is not as easy as you think!
Who the fuck thought up this nonsensical bullshit?? And who the fuck is going around accidentally tapping their caps lock key to the point where such a delay would be needed?? Do you not know where your own fingers are??
Seriously, all this does is penalize fast typists and people who actually want to USE the caps lock key for what it was meant for.
I swear to god this one little thing pisses me off SO much. And what's worse is they don't even give you an option to disable it, AND it's bloody fucking impossible to disable yourself even through the terminal.
(Also, typing this rant with so many caps was probably not as cathartic as I was going for!) 😂9
Apple fanboys justify the removal of audio jack as simplification of design. How the fuck am i supposed to find those damn pods if i misplace them. and what uf your bluetooth pods are shit and i want a different one. Fucking idiots.4
So apple wants you to open your system logs with Photoshop, truly? So the fuck up and crashes looks more "beautiful"?5
This “Auto save” feature in the latest app version is buggy..
-> new rant
-> prefilled with previous rant..
Anyway, here my actual rant begins.
Apple, go fuck yourself, seriously.. put your trillion dollars way up your arse...
Moved to Ireland, want to switch country..
“If you want to switch countries, cancel your Apple Music subscription first”..
so be it. Cancelled it..
“Your subscription will be cancelled in 28 days”.
FUCK YOU, YOU COCK SUCKING BASTARDS!!
I NEED TO SWITCH THE STORE TO BE ABLE TO DOWNLOAD BANKING APPS AND STUFF LIKE THAT..
But ok, I’m screwed in this regard..
Suddenly iMessage stopped working. This is kind of a big deal because I have unlimited data but only unlimited sms to Irish numbers and I need to communicate with people in Switzerland and Germany..
Internet works so I try to turn iMessage off and in again. But that doesn’t work.. i can only reactivate iMessage via WiFi.
So I go back to the hotel, reactivate iMessage..
“Verifying imessage” >> google..
Leads me to an Apple forum: “the verification of iMessage can take up to 24h”.
Are you fucking kidding me? I’m in a new country and rely on this overpriced shit..
Fun but sad fact, I have a second phone with me. IPhone 4 with iOS 7 and that thing WORKS!!
If this is where the future is going we’re all gonna die very soon.. plains crash, power plants explode but hey, at least they have data about it and it looks shiny. That’s all that matters..
Another reason to switch to android..
MacOs fucked me up so I already switched to windows + Linux. Next one will be getting rid of iOS, they don’t build small phones anymore anyway..1
Why apple is a peice of shit..? Why even people love it.. It makes apple to grow more.. Although they don't deserve it.. They don't deserve the trillion dollars.. Why don't they fuck them self..
In a year they release a peice of shit and people are like applauding on it.
Are you fucking serious people?
The people who called as "apple fanboy" please go fuck yourself.. Tell me one reason to love apple..
I am not talking about the price issue. I am talking about they think that they are the best.. But no they are not. They are a bunch of asshole who are working to make money.. They don't need to respect.25
tldr: Fuck Apple AND Microsoft...
Tried to check my "me" email today (iCloud)... and well it's apparently "locked" for god only knows what reason, and they will only let me recover it through a Hotmail account that I haven't used in >10years.. So I tried that and after one login attempt outlook.com is telling me "you've entered too many wrong password attempts, you must reset your password"... ugh OK, so I hit the button and it's asking me "my" security question.. 'where did you and your spouse meet?'.. wtf? I'm not married now nor was I @12yrs old when I made this account....
Well thanks so I guess that's fucked for forever...7
In what fucking programming language a constructor can return a nullable value???
Swift of course. :|
Fuck apple :-)5
PCs are a clusterfuck these days. Microsoft has abandoned the niceness of Win-7 and opted for Win-10 - with spyware, untested forced updates and forced online licence checks to make sure you have to get the shit. Macs are total crap, and Apple doesn't care because they instead prefer to milk customers with overpriced iShit. Linux sucks and looks like a Soviet tractor, but at least, it doesn't fuck up itself just by switching it on.
I had Linux as only OS from 2001 to 2010, and while I obviously can deal with it, I finally hated it enough to switch over to Win-7. From 2020 on, it looks like I will be back because Microsoft has managed to fuck up Windows even worse (and then these suckers wonder why Github users don't trust them). Maybe I'll buy a Tux when I install Linux so that I can punch it in the face.
Progress was yesterday - today it's about damage control. Welcome to a world where the brightest CS guys are thinking about how not only to shove up even more ads into peoples' asses, but how to also transmit lab data of the poo.7
Apple guys are a bunch of liars and hypebeast darkmode hipsters yet we all follow this stupid cult.5
Me : trying to enable WiFi hotspot on an iPhone.
iPhone: "To enable personal hotspot on this account contact carrier..."
Me : Motherf........!!!!!! ლ(ಠ益ಠლ)
(Had to watch a YouTube video hack to get it to work..)
iPhone : "WiFi hotspot enabled but is only enabled over Bluetooth and USB..."
Me : Urghhhh$#&@℅!!!!!!!! WTF apple????????
Fuck you apple!!!!!
Me : trying to enable WiFi hotspot on an Android.
Android : "there you go.....(☞ﾟヮﾟ)☞"
Me : (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ4
All of a sudden the Macbook Pro power adapter was broken yesterday. Guess how much does it cost just to replace it?
Fuck you Apple. If you're gonna overprice, it make it durable and good quality dammit.9
Fuck you Apple! What the fuck does it mean for you “deactivate WiFi detection until tomorrow”? Does it mean activate it like 5 Minutes later? And why the fuck if I close your fucking WiFi screen choice do you open it up again straight after closing it?
P.s.: who want an iPhone X at discounted price?9
What the literal fuck apple? YOU ADDED ANOTHER USELESS FORM OF DATA COMPRESSION??? NO ONE WILL EVER USE XIP!!5
Only difference between iPod and iPhone is you can use phone to make a call.
And pay 79654646161$ extra for that feature?
What the fucking fuck Apple!!!10
Im in the process of developing a tool for small comunity of gamers.
That tool will help people in mod making.
Currently you have to use notepad++ in order to modify .json files that contain unit properties.
I downloaded grep for win to check for patterns in those .json files to understand how they work
I ran a simple search and...
Avast decided to frezze my pc for 20min to check 300 files because winGrep accesed them...
WHY THE FUCK DID YOU DECIDE TO SATURATE MY HDD IO YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT? I HAVENT GOT ANY WIRUSES FOR 6 YEARS YOU ARE USELESS. I WILL UNINSTALL YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE JUST WASTING MY RESORUCES AND MY TIME.
I cant even reboot my laptop because i would lose my code!
Fuck slow hdd's
Fuck inefficient programs
Fuck people who thought that instaling a bunch of crap on win 10 is a good idea
Fuck people who will try to convince me to swich to linux
I love my C hashtag
I might swich to win10 ltsb7
Woke up this morning to my Macbook completely drained.
Turns out my USB-C cable had dislodged itself.
But what *really* pisses me off is why the fuck is my computer completely drained overnight? Did it have the screen on the whole time? I swear I've come down in the morning and the screen on my Macbook is still on. I wouldn't be surprised.
Apple is really losing their touch.2
Till now, my experience with Mac OS and iOS has been fucking shit... and that is, if said elegantly...
As of now, I have formatted my phone AND laptop about 8-9 times i believe ( got phone a week ago, laptop a couple weeks ago )...
iCloud won't even work properly for me, image synchronization is pretty much fucked up in every damn way and is unresponsive for 99%. The remaining 1% when it works is the time when i actually reformat the system.
And don't even get me started on "Continuity"... it is continuously, robustly, non working at all times. Hell, the phone can't even connect to the laptop over bluetooth, so Continuity is a far off thing.
VERY disappointed at Apple.
OR, it hates me particularly because everything works perfectly fine for a friend of mine. ( He hasn't even formatted his devices once since like 2 years... ).
I love technology, but apparently, it HATES me to death </3
Oh and fuck u Apple for giving me such a pitiful software suite...
BTW, undergoing another format on phone. On laptop right now to write this rant. Laptop is gonna be formatted again in like 6-7 hours from now...
Fuck this piece of shit that calls itself a Macbook Pro. Bought myself a Mac in 2011 because I wanted something durable. Spent 2k € on it. Now its more annoying thany any Windows machine I ever had because I have this fucking GPU glitch that Keeps. Crashing. My. Machine. I cant work that way.
Yeah, already had it repaired. Didn't work. Use gfxCardStatus to keep it on integrated. Doesnt work. Well, I coud just buy a new one, couldn't I? Fuck Apple, fuck you.6
New macbook pro has no usb ports , that's apple way of saying "fuck all developers" . That is such a dick move , also the shitty butterfly keyboard i don't know if any developer will like it , any thoughts?11
There’s a new macOS update..
Me: install now..
Os: there’s another account active, blah blah blah.. please accept our new GPL..
Me: fair enough.. accept GPL..
OS again: Hi blah blah, same message..
Me: ok I’ll try „do it later“..
Os: there’s another account active, blah blah blah.. GPL..
Me: go fuck your self, fuck your overpriced hardware, go guck your software that’s way worse than it was 5 years ago, go fuck YOU!!!
OS: I know I suck, but we don’t Care. So please accept our new GPL.
Thanks apple for becoming what Microsoft was 10 years ago..,
Part two of: a day off an iOS developer life:
1. App crashed and stack trace gives no info in which file it happened, I have a generic table view cell that is used in so many places and Xcode just wrote: xcell does not support key value.
2. Mac freezing when Xcode is creating IPA file thanks to a new feature in Xcode 9 (Mac freezing is the new feature, even mouse pointer doesn't move -.-)
3. Let's check the value of this class property, Xcode: fuck off and either print it in console (after hitting a break point) or expand that shitty tree at the bottom to reach your class property!
An advice: never click jump to definition when Xcode is indexing, it will either freezing Xcode or crash it.
Part 1 link: https://devrant.com/rants/1137208/...1
So I hate apple, we were updating an app from a year ago and everything went well until we tried to submit. We kept getting this error about launch screen images for iPhone 5. We tried everything stack overflow had to say but nothing worked, NOTHING.
Here is the thing, we tried to submit the exact same binary on our other Mac, and it worked. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK APPLE.
I hate Apple since they dropped OpenGL and Nvidia support. My question to them:
WHAT THE FUCK IS THE PURPOSE OF DROPPING IT? YOU ARE JUST GETTING MORE HATE10
Guys seriously, how the fuck did we end up like this? What's the deal with the new ~2Kg piece of aluminium that Apple is selling for $999, the "Apple Stand Pro"...
How did we allow for such a company gain this much of arrogance and confidence to sell us normal goods for exorbitant prices?
I seriously cannot imagine the unit production price going beyond $100, and I'm exaggerating a lot here. I can't think of any economic model that justifies the extra $899. They're exploiting cheap Chinese labor for fuck sake! What costs do they have?5
So yeah XML is still not solved in year 2018. Or so did I realize the last days.
I use jackson to serialize generic data to JSON.
Now I also want to provide serialization to XML. Easy right? Jackson also provides XML serialization facitlity similar to JAXB.
Works out of the box (more or less). Wait what? *rubbing eyes*
Why is my groups property (java.util.Set) rendered as two separate elements? Who the fuck every though this is the way to go?
So OK *reading the docs* there is a way to create a collection wrapper. That must be it, I thought ...
What the fuck is this now? This is still not right!!!
I know XML offers a lot of flexibility on how to represent your data. But this is just wrong ...
The only logical way to display that data is:
It would be better if the individual entries would be just called "group" but I guess implementing such a logic would be pretty hard (finding a singular of an arbitrary word?).
So yeah theres a way for that * implementing a custom collection serializer* ... wait is that really the way to go? I mean common, am I the only one who just whants this fucking shit just work as expected, with the least amount of suprise?
Why do I have to customize that ...
So ok it renders fine now ... *writes test for it+
FUCK FUCK FUCK. why can't jackson not deserialize it properly anymore? The two groups are just not being picked up anymore ...
SO WHY, WHY WHY are you guys over at jackson, JAXB and the like not able to implement that in the right manner. AND NOT THERE IS ONLY ONE RIGHT WAY TO DO IT!
*looks at an apple PLIST file* *scratches head* OK, gues I'll stick to the jackson defaults, at least it's not as broken as the fucking apple XML:
I really wonder who at apple has this briliant idea ...2
I dunno if you gents remember the Nickelodeon show known as Drake and Josh.
It was pretty big in Mexico and the U.S.
Well, one of the characters from that show is the singer/actor Drake Bell.
For a while, Drake Bell would **constantly** tweet about how much Justin Bieber sucks.
I aint denying that Justin Bieber sucks, i don't like his music at all.
But the constant attacks came out as jealousy, at least to me.
What does this has to do with development or even computers? Well this is EXACTLY how I feel about Louis Rossman CONSTANTLY making videos about apple products.
We get it man we really do, sadly for a lot of us the only way to get ios development done is through a fucking Mac
EVEN if his whiny ass is right about the hardware not being top notch and all that shit I AM still not able to explain a 2013(early...as in january) macbook pro still working with literally NO fucking problems. Before that the other macbook was just changed because we wanted the 2013 model. The thing worked, the one before did so too and the 2017 model that I have works, amazingly so i will add.
Still, the army of dell,hp and lenovo laptops that I've had before just died or are not functioning properly. Either it is my shit luck or Apple's "shitty hardware" got something really fucking right.
I think its retarded really. If you don't like them then fine, you don't have to, personally I fucking love all computers and os, but I don't get fanboys hating for the sake of hate.
the fuck you care if I spend 2500 on a computer? I would the same shit for your mom and the computer would last me longer.
Does owning multiple macs make me better than you? No
Does this mean that you are piss poor and can't afford shit and that is why you are hating? No
Will I call you <insert number of insults> gor your choice of pc or os? No
What is retarded is this: you all are DEVELOPERS(at least a good chunk) and your ass better fucking know that some people USE a certain tool because IT IS THE RIGHT ONE FOR THE JOB.
It is a damn fine operating system, a really good computing experience. It ain't your taste? Fine, das cool, but for fucks sake it does not mean that the other people are idiots or whatever.
Grow the fuck up and get yourself an opinion.20
Create a full open-source company based on no-knowledge services to compete with the data hogs that pretty much own the internet as it stands4
As someone that's been spoiled with Python and HTML, fuck me is IOS development a pain in the ass to learn
Furthermore, how the fuck does anyone even work with xcode, everything Apple makes tends to be 'intuitive' but this is the most confusing piece of shit editor I've ever used
It took me up to two hours to fogure out how to horizontally & vertically center a button AND IT RESIZES ITSELF BACK TO THE SMALLEST POSSIBLE WIDTH FOR NO FUCKING REASON7
I hate when Apple news websites do articles on Android. 99% of the time it's pure bullshit coming from someone whose last experience with Android was Gingerbread, if any. 9to5mac is a really bad offender, but so feel TheVerge is extra shitty with Android articles. For someone who claims to do news on everything impartially, they warp their sights towards Apple way too much.
That obviously means that costumers will get scared of leaving Apple for what might be a better experience for their use case. I just absolutely hate this kind of partial journalism.
TL;DR fuck 9to5mac and The Verge for scaring people off using Android with misinformation10
What the fuck this fucking shit of an app supposedly went through five rounds of QA and I broke it in 5 minutes? Holy fucking shit How this is the main point of your job. You shitty shits take forever getting this PR to me and now it’s buggier than a haunted house on Halloween?
After this is after wanting to cuss Apple for making me update the os then then xcode then iTunes just to recognize the goddamn development phone. It’s an app built off Cordova it works for like 14 versions of iOS just run the bugger you over priced aluminum chassis dildo riding fruit Fuckers.
Now back to the goddamn cluster fuck I just got delivered. What the goddamn fuck. This level of bullshittery I have not seen before. And apparently Cordova is only partly de-sandboxed? I don’t know for sure because I don’t have time to test it because I’m running the entire technological stack of this company on a junior dev salary!
When you tell me it goes though all this QA and you spend 2 weeks on just QA tickets for fucks sake the first operation I do, the most common fucking operation on the app, the shit we have been building around all this fucking time, should not fucking error out. For fucks sake at least try to get the main fucking thing working. I recognize you did a lot of work and implemented a number of features but what the fuck good are they if I can’t even run them for one fucking time.
Why the fuck does Apple have a service called LSD? Is it because of the mushrooms that took Steve Jobs?2
You see this fucker? Those are packets sent to Apple, what are those packets? The update of an app I am working on.
Makes me wonder why the fuck does upload disconnect out of a sudden when there is not a single issue in the network I'm connected to!
Apple get your shit together cuz an update process takes more time than developing the damn app!2
Apple 2018: we integrated uikit with Mac apps so now it will be way much easier to program for mac
Me: OMG THIS IS AMAIZING
Apple: all of these apps are now running on Mac with uikit
Apple: this will be available to you developers in 2019 : )
Me: BICH WHAT THE FUCK?!2
Who the fuck in Apple's marketing team decided that WWDC should be held at the exact same time as E3? Like how am I mean't to be distracted by the cool stuff at E3 at work while also being distracted by the stuff being released by Apple?9
I don’t really have just one.
Ada Lovelace, she is the reason we have everything and she is the OG
Margaret Hamilton is badass and got Apolo 11 to the moon
Steve Wozniak, the real brains behind OG Apple. And his tech revolutionized computers. Plus have you ever just watched a video of him he’s so fucking pure and innocent. Like holy fuck he’s awesome and just hella intelligent.
John Romero + John Carmack. Two of the programmers on the original DOOM dev team. The team revolutionized the gaming industry and
Katie Bouman, just got added to the list for the black hole picture
A friend of mine is youtuber and he does a lot tests on phone ( call him X)
Another friend of mine hates Apple product. Partly because he can’t afford it (call him Y)
whenever X wants to do a WATER RESISTANCE TEST, Y would go: “Lets fuck Iphone”
whenever X wants to do a HEAT RESISTANCE TEST, Y would go: “Lets fuck Iphone”
whenever X wants to do a DROP TEST, Y would go: “Lets fuck Iphone”
One fine day, same happened and X got a bit red. X says: Y come here. Closer, a little more ( few centimeters away now). “Are you fucking mad or what?”2
That would be Sony.
Mainly because the of PlayStation 4. I mean what kind of company blocks the access to third party’s account so you can use it only on their console (the Fortnite situation). That’s literally saying “we own you, bitch”. Even Apple doesn’t do that kind of crap.
Fuck Sony and their PlayStation. I’m sticking with Xbox. Yes, it doesn’t have as many of exclusives. Yes, it’s made by Microsoft - the same company which made Windows 10. But fuck Sony even more than them.2
Doing react-native and find out I can't develop iOS apps on windows pc.
Fuck you Apple and your XCode1
Why Safari sucks even more then fucking IE. Not even the easiest inputform gets displayed normaly on this SHITLOAD OF PISS
...at least i don't have to buy a Mac to debug in Safari OH WAIT! FUCK YOU APPLE! FUCKING FUCK YOU!11
Fuck Amazon! Or apple? Or both? I don’t know...
I just wanted to read a book on my iPad using the kindle app. I can read a free excerpt from the book but when I decided that I wanted to buy the book, I couldn’t. Not from within the kindle app nor the amazon app.
I read on the internet that it has something to do with the greediness of apple and that they want an astronomical cut from the sales. So amazon decided that they wouldn’t sell ebooks in the iOS-Apps.
I had to get my android phone and buy the book using the app I’ve installed there. I could’ve also opened the amazon webpage in my browser.
Fucking retards, I just want to read! And the worst thing is, I don’t even really know whom to blame!
Anyways, now I can read the book (zum Leben ist es schön aber ich würde da ungern auf Besuch hinfahren by Tilman birr if anybody is interested)4
Woke up 4am today to push my first iOS app. Took me three phucking hrs to realise apple is down! Their FUCKING dev stats website says all is green! Fuck u xcode1
So I really hate iOS programming. I'm in school and all my devices for dev are Microsoft based and fuck trying to use hackintosh. So now I have to waste more of my time and gas money going to school to use the stupid fucking imacs to Develop in a language I have 0 interest in. Fuck apple, fuck iOS, and fuck swift!3
So my father asked me what I think about filemaker. I researched, while we were waiting for the food (restaurant) bs holy fuck, I've never gotten this bad vibes from a from something I believe to be a scripting language.
> proprietary (Apple)
> only articles I found about it were related to LinkedIn or at least written like they were
> not a single text based tutorial on the first pages of the search result, only videos (didn't watch them, because my mobile data is too scared for that)
> I can't find anything remotely explaining what this shit is about.
wikipedia was the most best resource I could find
> Free ebook about "how to train your junior developer" for filemaker requires me to enter way too much personal information.2
If you wanna think that I'm a bad programmer, that's ok, but I can't put up anymore with Xcode.
Jesus Christ. An entire afternoon spent trying to make an array with two dimensions. I tried every fucking way I found in SO, in the apple site and in every another site that I found in my way.
First: For every example for Swift 3 there's another 10 for Swift <3.
Second: Mutable arrays, as I'm noticing, aren't a thing anymore, so, to declaring array size we go! Except it's impossible to. Tried 3 different ways. Not a single one worked.
Third: Actually, one of the 3 tries worked, for int arrays, and for some obscure reason it won't work for strings, as declaring the array as [String] is too general for swift, I mean, I completely agree with it, a [String] array could contain anything right???? FUCK NO. IT CONTAINS STRINGS YOU FUCKER!!!!
I swear, if the equipment was mine and not from the office, I would have thrown that piece of shit which disconnects from the fucking computer every 30 seconds that apple calls keyboard out of the window already.
Why the fuck do I need to develop for iOS in swift/xcode?? There's so many cross platform alternatives out there, good ones in fact, but no, we must build the applications natively or else the phone will catch on fire according to my boss.
I kinda liked Apple until now.
From now on? Fuck Apple.10
So in the last 2 hours I felt both frustrating and happiness, because of Xcode and code signing.
So what I did yesterday was removed all the Xcode certificates on my keychain because I had major issues getting the newest version of the certificates despite have auto signing enabled.
Without much notice until going to send the iOS app today through Fabric I came across an error while uploading the newest build :/
Googling it I found the same issue on stack overflow with only two answers one being fastlane, which just automated the process to the same error LOL
So anyways I found the solution and was quite happy about it :D I had to go to the apple developer website and download the right certificate DESPITE the auto signing ...
Anyways uploaded and done!
Also added a stack overflow answer in regards to it, I hope it helps someone out.
Oh and I emailed fabric to ask for help and 30 mins later emailed them basically saying NVM fixed it! Lol
Fuck you Xcode lol
What web charting lib are you using ?
I tried canvasjs, chartjs, google chart..
And for the moment i love Echart, not too verbose1
On 2016 I bought a new macbook pro 13’ 2015 mid. I loved it, I still love it, it works so smoothly even after 3 years and I am restarting it only once a month (or even less). I loved it so much, that I completely moved to whole ecosystem: new iphone X - which I love too, apple watch - which is awesome for my cycling workouts.
Anyway, a few month ago I changed a job, and when they asked what laptop I want it’s just natural that I requested macbook pro. And now I regret it...
I got macbook pro 13’ 2018, and it’s worst piece of shit I ever used. My old budget lenovo laptop for 400 euros worked way better than this crap.
* top touch bar is a fucking joke, if I want to skip/pause music, change/mute volume I need at least 3 clicks - good job apple, that’s super productive. I would rant about esc key too, but I kind of got used to it, still I prefer to feel it. But nah, got new keyboard so it doesn’t matter.
* sometimes it doesn’t charge, the only way to fix it - restart.
* if I close laptop it doesn’t sleep, that means every time I go away I need to explicitly tell my laptop to sleep. That wasn’t a case in 2015 model.
* after sleep mode it doesn’t detect my jack connected headphones anymore, so I need to replug them - this one is super annoying, considering I am working in open office.
* Something is always crashing or not working, in 2 months there was no a single time that it would last a single week without restarting.
So yeah, fuck you apple, not ever again gonna buy any of your products nor gonna recommend it to anyone.8
I want to start a rant thread, imagine yourself living in Syria, or south Africa, or a gang run neighbourhood in South America... What would your rant be..
the well where we get our water just got shat on by the Town drunk
Now I have to walk 5 km instead of 2.. My kid sister needs water today or she might die...
.. And! Siri just gave me the wrong fucking directions
(Not real apples, cuz.. I'm hungry)7
Right now I'm standing in this Apple Reseller store waiting in the line and there's an old man who doesn't understand a fuck of his iPhone, and it turns out it's about setting up his fucksucking mail! I'm waiting for half an hour already, am so fucking done with this.
There's also this useless shit of an "Apple Expert" employee who doesn't do a thing. He constantly walks through the store very nervous and I'm getting fucking sick of this guy...2
Google tracks Android users even with location services turned off.
Fuck Google & Apple; Are there any decent mobile operating systems that actually respect your privacy?12
Notice how the Apple code samples have moved from the very well designed Objective C to a mature Swift... (sorry, typo, manure Swift) Swift 1.0, wait 2.0, no hold on 3.0, oh yea 4.0. It's a moving target for their developers with code samples all over the place...
Once Swift stabilizes, sure, ok, force everyone and everything to change (seriously?).
Apple, why the FUCK do you think we want to deal with your beta crap forced down our throat? Its bad enough the language is an inconsistent illogical mess but having to come along with you for the 'we-don't-have-a-clue-what-we-are-doing' ride is utter bullshit. Leave the GOD DAMN Objective C samples up for crying out loud.6
YOU FUCKING FUCK APPLE GET YOUR FUCKING SHIT TOGETHER DAMN IT!
Left work 4 hours ago and guess what fucking ipa file did not get uploaded to app store, why? no one fucking knows! I admit 4Mbit speed isn't fast but if a tiny interruption happens to the mac's connection apploader will simply drop the upload!
I don't understand NASA was able to reach Mars and Apple fails to make a fucking decent file uploader !!!!
Now I will be going to waste two fucking hours tomorrow morning for the fucking file to be uploaded!
You know apple has its dick deep inside your ass when you buy a Macbook pro with no discrete gpu for game development(unreal engine) and then shell out $1500 for a fried cpu.18
Holy fucking shit are email clients bullshit.
I don't know what happened there but if you thought the chrome-firefox-ie-egde gaps back in the days were sick - let me tell you.. email clients are made by the devil himself. All of them. All of them? Yup. Because he made some of them being owned by apple, working beatuiful and no weird stuff.
But on the same end he made some of them owned by microsoft and their office Studios. They use the word engine to render html emails. Read this again. Read it without starting to cry in agony.
But thats not enough. Let's make some of them use an ie-engine and the mac os variants going to use some webkit based renderer. This way there will be no valid ruleset to make it look good on all of them, isn't this great??
Now this might be hell already. But lets pour more salt into these wide opened wounds.
Let there be Germany and United Internet, owning trash like Web.de and GMX, whose android clients going to work completely different across Android and app-versions!
Once you've mastered these, let me introduce you to gmail. Lets take only the body node of your email and do some fuck up with it, so you have to display a non-responsive variant on mobile.
Now you might be thinking "but there are web-based clients, they'll do good ain't they?" Long story short: fuck you.
Let's go back to ms.
Hey dude lets make it possible to scale up your whole system. So old people can read shit better. And now the funny part: let's make it so that the word rendering engine, rendering emails goes completely mayhem on your mail, so it looks like a completely different thing! (:
If you ever receive a newsletter in your inbox and that shit looks like it's planned to look like.. appreciate that shit. Sacrifice a virgin as thanksgiving for it.
E-Mail needs to die. I'm doing this for over 2 years now and this shit needs to stop asap.4
Me: Alright, new week, back from vacation fully rested and focused, lets get productive.
Apple(safari 10.3 update): Fuck you.
Basically the change log was:
*fixed critical security bug.
*added more bugs to fix later.
Well fuck you too safari... You disgust me.
The least the fucking imbeciles, or monkeys, behind safari can do is add a fucking css prefix. For fucks sake.
It's 3am, just submitted an app for review for iOS... go to take one last test drive on the release build for android, and I get stuck in an infinite loop of "system up stopped working". An factory reset and an hour later, I'm saying fuck this, android waits, and fuck whatever Xamarin did to my phone. While I'm at it, fuck Apple for making me have 20+ icons in different sizes, and their shitty walled garden approach to a so called marketplace.4
After 24 hours waiting for Xcode 9 to finish download, I run it on an existing project and got greeted with this:
For fucknsake you piece of shit! Because indexing project isn't enough now Xcode index text! What the fuck are Apple employees smoking 😔4
Former android fan, I’ve been using iPhone SE for a while, and now I’m ready to give feedback. We are talking about brand new, iOS 11.2.2 device, never jailbraked (jailbroken?) or made anything fucked up to.
The main problem is battery life. It’s poor. I mean, my cheap ass Meizu m3s stands for about three times longer. Now I always need to carry power bank or charger around, keeping it up from one outlet to another.
iOS 11 is unstable and flawed. Music widget on lock screen freezes randomly, ui falls apart sometimes, apps sometimes start in landscape mode. I never found android ui falling apart, just like webpage marked up by interns.
Transferring files to Linux PC is huge pain in the ass. Nuff said.
Aaaand... that’s all. There is literally only three problems present.
On the other hand, there is huge advantages over android:
Speed. It’s unbeatable. It’s absolutely stunning. Need camera? Here it is, quarter second away. Android camera needed straight 15 seconds to start up. Taking picture? Here it is, flawless as always. Zero motion blur, gamma is ideal, focus is so sharp so you may hurt your eyes. Need 100 pictures? Here you go, just press the button and hold it. Maybe s9 or another shiny ass android takes pictures as fast as iPhone, but I bet my iPhone will be taking pictures same flawlessly after 5 years, while your android will probably become sluggish ass piece of crap.
Not. A. Single. Fucking. Lag.
Asphalt 8? 60 FPS all the way down. 2GIS? Fraction of a second away. That’s it, that’s how it have to be.
Sound quality. Just as neat as my Sansa Clip. EarPods are crap, so I’m using my SE215. Not going to ever come back to Sansa. Xperia TX had much less quality audio btw.
Apps. As long as the whole enterprise world sucking Apple’s dick, apps are running silky smooth and the things are not going to change. Come on. Apple is the king nowadays, admit it or not.
Keyboard is amazing. Screen is amazing. It’s just that pleasing. The sounds iPhone makes are great, while android sounds piss me off and making me hold myself from throwing the phone straight to the wall.
iPhone makes me feel cared about. Everything is on it’s place, everything fits perfectly. You are watching YouTube, you need to adjust volume and volume bar appears as tiny strip on the very top, just to not distract you. Make screenshot, draw something on it, share and hit delete. Every action you need is one tap away. Look up word? One tap away. Position the cursor between words? Polished as fuck, here you go, have your handy magnifying glass. Adblock in safari? Install it from the App Store and it will be literally two taps away, right at the settings. No VPN needed. Safari doesn’t become slow with Adblock, it’s just the same amazingly fast browser, but without ads. And Apple Music is just one dollar a month for students, filled with high quality songs.
Even google apps working better on iOS.
The advantages are clear for me, while downsides aren’t significant. @irene, you wanted to know what I’ll tell after a while, so I’m saying it proudly:
I’m never ever coming back to android.12
All I am asking for is a debugger in Xcode that works as well as Macintosh Programmer's Workshop ( MPW) circa 80's/90's. Maybe I am being unreasonable?
I stepped a line in the debugger and all the variables disappear... and all I get is the spinny "fuck you" indicator and the variables all disappear.
But here is the worst part... Apple isn't holding any of those fucktards on the Xcode team accountable for producing a shit product.
I'm really glad I don't have to do this as a full time job anymore. Then why do I continue to pound nails with my forehead (use Xcode)?
Whip me, beat me, make me use Xcode...5
Fuck motherfucking android 8 fucking sideways. And Huawei for that matter too.
My battery drains like 30% faster since the update from 7.0, with even more app limiting than in 7. I've already ranted about UI stuff, but that is negligible compared to this bullshit.
Also, auto brightness is broken and it keeps blinding me fora few seconds in the dark, and choosing way too much brightness.
I've loved my otherworldly battery life, now I feel like an apple user with 4k mah.
I used to get one and a half day battery, now I barely get through the day.12
Developing and deploying in Xcode is some Requiem for a Dream level bullshit.
I literally just de selected everything for managing automatic signing, and re-selected the EXACT SAME GODDAMN THING. And it worked. It’s literally some fucking shit you do when you are first learning how to code or learning a language and you keep flipping something but you don’t get exactly how it works.
But this is YOUR FUCKING FLAGSHIP development product. I shouldn’t have to check my goddamn inception totem to see if I’m dreaming or not because this kind of bullshit can’t be real life.
That being fucking said your bullshit forced shutdown also FUCKED MY ANDROID STUDIO INSTALLATION AND FUCKED MY $PATH. Thanks. Now NOTHING WORKS. Fuck you Apple. Between slowing my phone and the cluster or problems your shit is causing that are just random as hell and are plenty common because thank god people smarter than me have fixed them in SO by now, I am SO READY TO LEAVE THE APPLE ECO SYSTEM. If I didn’t have to use one of the boxes to push iPhone app updates I doubt I would touch one again.
Apple stuff looks good but at this point that’s about it.
This stupid computer is in clamshell mode connected to my screen and mech %99.999999 of the time. I take it with me on a trip and the down arrow key breaks off (little plastic shit-thing snapped off)..WTF? 2013 Macbook that has about 5 hours of total keyboard-use, at best.
Walk into the Apple shop in Varna, 3 Euros and I'm back in action.
ahhhh fuck..it was probably my fault clacking too hard.
Good sushi here and my dry February has happily turned into large pints of Kamenitza...
Cheers from Bulgaria, you fucks..5
While developing on xcode, I will be spending more time on waiting for the xcode to respond to my actions than actually writing code, especially when editing the storyboard, FUCK APPLE!8
When you realise the headset for your iPhone 7 cannot be plugged in to the computer and people are talking as fuck around you. Thx Apple...4
What the hell is wrong with the browser on iOS....
For Christ sakes almost no input attributes work. I have a Sign Up feature that validates passwords with a pattern attribute; doesn't work, required attribute; doesn't work, input type number; doesn't work.
What the fuck is wrong with this thing. Even Internet Explorer knows what those attributes means. Absolute joke now i need to implement it manually. Fuck off apple.11
My roomies safari doesn't load our college website properly.
Now, i know there are certain things to make a website apple compatible,
But i wonder if he is going to go ' FUCK APPLE FUCK APPLE' like he does with other companies!
I really just hate Apple development. Xcode blows hard ass and if you are a person like me who has 0 Apple devices and has to go to the fucking school labs to code then why wouldn't you hate apple development. It's really the lack of being able to code outside a fucking Mac cause its just pointlessly limiting, fuck you Apple.13
Oh my god my iMac has been decompressing that bloody Xcode_8_beta.xip file for over 45 minutes, why the fuck it taking so long?2
Found out that I had apple music for free for months.
Now I only have until the end of the year to get alllll the CDs I ever wanted legally.
Already spend 5gb in two days... Let's see if it's really unlimited...
After the end of the year, unsubscrive. Worst experience after installing the app, Apple wants to know everything about me, shares my Playlist without asking... (just 10 minutes arround definitions, still abusive for a premium service).
Fuck Apple abusive policies, thank you for the opportunity to rape Apple without pay.
Space oddity by David Bowie, finding so many songs I forgot I love...2
FCUKING SHIT X-FUNCING-CODE! Collapsed code by mistakenly typing the shortcut now I cannot fucking EXPAND IT AGAIN T_T T_T T_T3
So to everyone crying about the price of the new iPhone X:
If people have the money and they will enjoy it.. Just let them. Do you complain every time your neighbour gets himself a new Audi when he could also just drive a Dacia? Just mind your own business.
I'm not gonna buy this shit either but I won't judge other people by doing so.
Every year the same mindless Apple-bashing. It's just senseless11
Been a mobile developer since April, liking the experience and the amount of projects that I've been a part of.
And one of the things that I've learned about this is that sometimes the client doesn't even know what he really wants. I mean for fucksakes, we implement everything, and new functionalities and there's always something that works on every other app (and is basically a standard) and he thinks is not suppose to be like that...
And another thing. Fuck Apple Store. At the company we've developed an app that practically shows information that only users should see (in our logic is sensitive information from our clients) and they DECLINED 4 FUCKING TIMES THE APP. Reason? Since the app's purpose "isn't correlated" with the basical information we show, the user can navigate through the app without going through login.
We basically added an "explore option" that shows basically nothing and they've accepted. FUCK APPLE FOR WAISTING OUR TIME AND THE CLIENTS TIME1
I hope I'm doing it wrong and there is actually a way to tell who the sender is, like an Id? But fuck no Apple finds it using tags with numbers a fucking genius idea!
Again, I hope I'm wrong and we can actually do something like: sender.id = txtName.id ...10
Who the fuck thought "hey! Safari on iOS would be a great idea!"? Decidedly that cuntfuck thought integrating the worst browser on shitty devices everyone faps to was *the* idea of the century.
No Mac? Go fuck yourself in the ass if you want to debug that shit with any device that has the fucking Apple logo. Prolapse™ by ProlApple, or Applapse rather.
My problem? I'm compiling typescript to straight fucking ES5 JS, why the fuck isn't it fucking working on iOS 10.2/3?! Is it still running ES1 Pre-Alpha RC-0.2.7 ?!! Even internet explorer is working...
(Not meant to offend anyone, just expressing some frustration)
I know lots of you like to shit on Apple. Generally I'm with you.. but I need to share something with you.
My Mid-2009 MacBookPro is still kicking.
Sure, over the years I've changed it to SSD, maximized the ram and changed the thermal gel.. although it sounds more like a jet plane than a notebook, it runs latest OS X (not macOS 🙄) and is still great for web development in 2017.
I mean it really runs pretty good for a 8+ years old machine. It really does.
But fuck no I ain't paying Apple ever again. I know FOR SURE once this piece of heavenly garbage is officially dead I'm getting myself a (most probably refurbished) ThinkPad.16
Hey, up for a challenge?
Upgrade to iOS 12 beta 2,
When all of your apps fail to open and u can only use apple safari, notes & other apple apps, start regretting the decision and downgrade your phone to iOS 11.4 when your phone starts up in data recovery mode and fails to recover data and then u need to send mom a sms of that picture of your family and explain the reason for why all of your data got deleted send me a picture so I can see how I did😤...
I deleted my jailbreak for this shit?!
(I understand it's a beta, but cmon on beta 1 haw of my apps didin't work, and on beta 2 I needed to restart my phone for 6 times before apps might start working and u need to wait 2 weeks before another beta releases, fuck off appl. With this beta shit, I guarantee there were thousends of users with same issue fix tht.)2
Can someone here tell me, Why the fuck is the Inbox app in the Apple App store around 250MB, while the same app is around 7MB on Google Play? Why? Why?
Here it comes! The annual Mac Os X upgrade, fuckup and clean install! 48 hours of thrilling hoping to get things done and lovely boot piano sound three times in a row!
Hope you burn, motherfuckers. Burn and suffer at least the same amount of hours (days!) I've been trying to fix your cheesy, crappy, weak silver garbage. I have lumps in my back which lasts longer than your technology. Go kernel panic your greedy narrow view asses.5
Objective: drill a huge hole in the Apple!
Following rant: https://devrant.com/rants/1564522/...
So... Apple music store saves the music in m4a in the app folder, so no other apps can access the music.
It saves it with wird file names, no structure.
I'm noob at basicly anything, and because I'm on vacations I have a cellphone with python basicly.
How can I get the music info from the files, change the files names to their singer/group + song music and latter sort them in folders by artist, then by album4
So I have been working on a project written in java with a team for a while now and up until today everything was bearable. Due to the idea that everyone on the team should be equal, everyone has full access to the repo, etc. One of the team members compiled the project and it failed to run, I should also note that their ide crashed after it compiled. So instead of reopening the ide he decompiled the jar made a 'fix' then commited to the repo. When another member saw the commit he told the other member to revert it because the code was completely fucked. Somehow he managed to commit 17 more fucking changes and now the repo looks like the apple pie after it gets fucked. To make a long story short his access is removed and we have been working all afternoon to fix up the code and find out what the fuck he did.
How the fucking fuck can you decompile a project and expect it to work???1
How can you finish your tasks fast when this fucking Xcode from hell, the worst IDE ever, is slowing you down? $H!+@UC!@#$%^&*3
Starting up my iPhone 4s to test something
Low battery, I plug it in
It charges, I put it down and let it download an app,
after 5 mins it starts making the sound of unplugging/replugging, something with the cable or the phone is broken, when I was with iphones, these cables were so bad, didn't matter if from Apple or third party
Fucking cables always broke on me
Since Android I never broke a single one, olf micro USB still holding up fine
I guess usb C is even better, but micro serves me a lot better than any fucking apple bullshit cables3
Hello Apple. Let me tell you something.
Even though i like your phones. I ABSOLUTELY WANT TO FUCKIN KILL YOU FOR YOUR HEADPHONES.
It's unbelievable you cock suckers, evey time the same shit happens.
WHY THE FUCK YOUR FUCKIN HEADPHONES AFTER 3-4 MONTHS START TO BEHAVE LIKE THEY ARE FUCKIN RETARDED.
1st headphones, they started changing songs randomly. That was back when i had iphone6.
It's ok i said, happens. Then i bought the iphone 7 and the headphones started behaving like that after some months. Again. Didn't say anything, i still liked them. So i went to buy the same headphones but for iphone6, with the 3.5mm jack. AND NOW THE SAME SHIT HAPPENS. FUCK YOU AND YOUR FUCKIN HEADPHONES AND YOUR FUCKIN 200€ HEADPHONES. COCKSUCKERS.
So, anyone knows any good quality headphones?
FUCK YOU APPLE.2
iOS notifications stopped working... Certs are good, nothing wss changed regarding notifications, everything works fine on the android side... What do you want from me apple???!!1
what the fuck I can't edit the rant after 5 minutes I am fucking posting a new rant which have that last rant ...Why they update the fucking x code in every fucking 15 days . Well some libraries are deprecated oh cool I can use my shit as an object. And why third party libraries don't provide some good documentation of their sdk's . What the fuck is that and I will personally kill auto layout by entering in the mac myself. What is the use of that fucking debugging tool if I know don't the crap of my code that in which class I have done something terribly wrong what the fuck . Oh cool I am having that clang error and I don't know how to wipe my ass. And please fucking don't tell me to use xib code in xcode for my project if there will be 600 screens I will still fucking use storyboard for that. I don't fuck with xib files do you hear me. And fucking stackoverflow ..what the fuck is wrong if I forget an single comma during posting a question ..what the fuck..and you know what the real feeling is when I post a issue on stackoverflow and I got nothing from them expect some minus points...and then the holy fucking coder inside me tells me to solve that fucking problem and I feel like having dope bitch. FUCCKKKK..5
For the past 5 hours I’ve been backing up my pc, reinstalling windows(full wipe of every drive) and, reinstalling programs to my fucking pc. I can now say I’ve been to hell and back, because fuck everything, now I need to rebuild it because 2 years ago “oh cable management is optional I don’t need to do that.” So fml. And especially fuck apple and windows. Fucking windows with having to reinstall once a year and Apple with overpriced bullshit lightning to 3.5 adapters, $10 for one because they removed 3.5 jacks. @linuxxx I understand why Linux is a good alternative although it sucks for gaming due to no support( I know about wine but I don’t want to use it due to it having problems half the time)5
Am I only the one who finds the pen pineapple apple pen video lame and boring?
Don't get people who finds it catchy and viral.
People in the Apple Store are either extremely chill or extremely pretentious. I've yet to find someone in-between.
FUCK YOU APPLE. I am trying to build an ionic app. Generating the certificates to fucking sign a DEVELOPER BUILD of an apple product is more pain than I thought possible. Does not help i dont own the apple computer i am trying to build on.
I am working on a SPA which also should work offline. So I add service worker, works perfect on chrome, then I take iphone and try it offline on safari, ofc it doest work. For fucking 3 hours looking where’s the issue, every article I read says its supported on safari, then I find out that its only in beta version. Yeah fuck you apple...
FUCK XCODE. FUCK AUTOLAYOUT. I have been working on my app for eight months, perfecting every detail and making the UI absolutely stunning. Today, Apple rejected my app for not supporting iPad. My app was not supposed to support iPad, I would hate for a user to install on an iPad. So, I said whatever and tried to autolayout the app. This didn't work, so I turned off autolayout. Guess what. My entire layout was destroyed and when I tried to click the undo button, nothing happened. This is classic Xcode. I am so fucking pissed, I want to scream. I just lost months of hard work because they can't fucking get their developer tool working, but they can release a phone with no headphone jack.4
Seeing some Ruby just reminded me of something.
Fuck Objective-C. What kind of lazy fuck makes C object oriented by stapling SmallTalk to it? A better name would be "C: Now with Dissociative Identity Disorder...oh and objects".
Apple apologists make excuses for this miserable language all the time...why? Because it's the only thing Apple would give you?
Swift is definitely an improvement though.4
Apple is fucking EVERYONE over with Safari 12. They are changing how extensions communicate with the browser, they are calling the new type of extensions Safari App Extensions. It means all current Safari Extensions will not work in Safari 12.
The problem with this is that they require all extensions to have this “backend” written in Swift with a VERY LIMITED API. Maybe you want to close a tab with your extension? “Fuck you, you’re not allowed” are Apple’s response to that. On top of this shit show their documentation is horrendous.
They will kill the extension ecosystem with this new approach, I’m sure of it, because most of the current extensions will not be able to migrate all their features to the new approach. They have built the API around specific extension types, so lots of extensions will simply not work in Safari 12. For distribution they will only allow extensions to be distributed via their new(?) Extension Store where they will review your code, just like an app for App Store. Unless you’re in the Apple Developer Program, which is $99/year.
I do not understand this change and I think it will hurt Apple in the sense that people will use other browsers where extensions are not as strictly controlled. Usually I understand Apple’s changes but this one is just beyond me. 🦆 you 🍎.2
So some of you might know I'm facing youtube iframe issues, to autoplay them in mobile
So few weeks later I found a solution to make it work the way it should in mobile i.e. to autoplay after a click on svg play button,
The logic I used https://codepen.io/briangelhaus/...
Boy oh boy I was so fucking happy, jumped out of my chair basically, So I grab a couple of android devices and it works
Enter infamous E-Corp Apple, the logic I used will never work on any apple devices, because apple do not allow autoplay on mobile, So I was like "okay, no worries"
I tell this news to my manager who is aware that I am working on this since weeks and he looks astonished for a millisecond when after hearing the same can't be done Apple, Tells me "then the issue is not fixed"
Well, you're not wrong, but a little appreciation to a trainee / jr dev who accomplished this by manipulating this would mean a lot for me.
And to Apple and Youtube Iframe API, FUCK YOU3
I would rant about apple and their horrible horrible system of just even being able to deploy an app to testers..
But you have to pay me 100$ a year so you can be able to find it out yourself, fuck support, we just want free money ~ herr jobs/ herr coo(c)k4
Fuck Off JPEG you piece of ancient shit. Hello HEIF! Not apple tech but they are certainly adopting it across the board (also replaces gif). Safari is the only browser supporting the format. Now we have to wait for every fucker else to arrive, could be 5 years for Mucroshite (wankers).7
After 3 hours I found why Visual Studio didn’t run on my MacBook but works on my Main Mac, Macbook is running beta and caused a bug! Fuck u Apple! Spent half a day on this!
"No matching provisioning profiles found: No provisioning profiles matching an applicable signing identity were found."
FUCK YOU APPLE!!!!! I've update it a thousand times mother fucker!!1
Fuck Apple’s auto renewal garbage. Purchased an app a year ago that I haven’t used in months, auto renewal was enabled by default and I got charged with no warning or notification. So fucking scammy and pathetic. Every subscription service I’ve used in the past would at least warn me ahead of time when my subscription was about to expire and that I would be charged, even when I’ve explicitly enabled auto-renewal. Not Apple though, such a garbage piece of shit company.2
After many years, I am trying to learn to react and react-native again.
I went to react native and click on get started. I downloaded CRNA and created Hello World. It asked me to download Expo client.
I was like WTF is this expo? So I installed it on my Note 8 and run the app. This is awesome. I don't have to build the whole app. It did not require Android SDK.
I open the expo website and found lots of SNACKS by other people. I can see the live output of many libraries and I loved the whole thing.
Finally, I installed the Expo client on my iPad. There was no scan barcode option. I thought it was weird. I saw login option. So naturally, I log in and wait for it to show in Expo client. Still nothing.
Finally, google about it and found out that due Apple, I can not see other people example on expo anymore.
Why the fuck Apple has to kill something this awesome. I can not express my anger on this.
Okay new Rant
INSERT TRIGGER WARNING HERE
OSX still sucks I have been using the bloody darn thing for last 8 months still I found things that are obnoxiously trivial missing.
Latest incident I was trying to plug in my android phone(soft bricked) in recovery mode and I had to push a file with ADB (i save this mutherfuker for another day). So back to the original topic now I plug it in and but turns out it doesn't recognize my device now as a preliminary check I decide to check my USB cable and my DONGLE both seem to be working fine now I try rebooting back into recovery. Now after scrapping the internet for a few hours I find that this problem is caused because sometimes due to a recurrent bug in OSX the operating system sometimes fails to recognize the difference in between directories "Adam"(just an example) and "adam" which in turn can interfere with some of the flags used while checking if a device might be connected.
I mean this is fucked why the fuck can you not simply use your device as an external storage that would have made the process easier by a fucking lot.
I think the people at Apple are going the destroy a UNIX powerhouse just to make their OS more CUPCAKE friendly.
And all of this is in addition to the problems with AFS.
I just wish I had not bought mac for development5
I'm still in the market for a new phone. I've been looking for the best part of a year now and I still can't decide.
I'm probably going to go with one of the Chinese smart phones just because of the insane features for such a low cost and the fact that they aren't fucking Samsung or Apple.
But which one?!
The OnePlus 5T looks incredible. It's the beefiest phone imaginable and it's so cheap for what it is. But ideally I'm looking to flash a custom ROM and I'm worried I'd fuck it up with a shiny new phone.
I'll probably be putting Nethunter on the phone (trying to fuck around with learning security).
I kinda hate brand bias, when people don't have an open mind when judging new products.
some people are ready, up late, waiting for next apple keynote just so they have stuff to rip off.
"animoji is so pointless"
then don't use it buddy :)
"apple tracks you"
"apple product limits you, google products allow you to do a lot more"
- apple iphone:
· download apps
· surf the web
· make calls and send texts
· do things offline
· use the native devRant app
· browse the fucking web
· there's a fucking 'write protect' screw in the motherboard so you can't fuck anything up
(yes I know, generally android is more customizable, but you'd expect more from a laptop over a computer)
I'm not an apple fanboy, I could make this rant about android hate, too, but because a product isn't for you doesn't mean it's not for everyone.6
Gotta love waking up to a notification from Apple Seed saying "iMac Pro is now available."
Since I did sales I knew some pricing ahead of time, but after looking at the upgrades and the max price, all I can say is, what the fuck.
Welp, that was enough of Apple for the day.4
During my small tenure as the lead mobile developer for a logistics company I had to manage my stacks between native Android applications in Java and native apps in IOS.
Back then, swift was barely coming into version 3 and as such the transition was not trustworthy enough for me to discard Obj C. So I went with Obj C and kept my knowledge of Swift in the back. It was not difficult since I had always liked Obj C for some reason. The language was what made me click with pointers and understand them well enough to feel more comfortable with C as it was a strict superset from said language. It was enjoyable really and making apps for IOS made me appreciate the ecosystem that much better and realize the level of dedication that the engineering team at Apple used for their compilation protocols. It was my first exposure to ARC(Automatic Reference Counting) as a "form" of garbage collection per se. The tooling in particular was nice, normally with xcode you have a 50/50 chance of it being great or shit. For me it was a mixture of both really, but the number of crashes or unexpected behavior was FAR lesser than what I had in Android back when we still used eclipse and even when we started to use Android Studio.
Developing IOS apps was also what made me see why IOS apps have that distinctive shine and why their phones required less memory(RAM). It was a pleasant experience.
The whole ordeal also left me with a bad taste for Android development. Don't get me wrong, I love my Android phones. But I firmly believe that unless you pay top dollar for an android manufacturer such as Samsung, motorla or lg then you will have lag galore. And man.....everyone that would try to prove me wrong always had to make excuses later on(no, your $200_$300 dllr android device just didn't cut it my dude)
It really sucks sometimes for Android development. I want to know what Google got so wrong that they made the decisions they made in order to make people design other tools such as React Native, Cordova, Ionic, phonegapp, titanium, xamarin(which is shit imo) codename one and many others. With IOS i never considered going for something different than Native since the API just seemed so well designed and far superior to me from an architectural point of view.
Fast forward to 2018(almost 2019) adn Google had talks about flutter for a while and how they make it seem that they are fixing how they want people to design apps.
You see. I firmly believe that tech stacks work in 2 ways:
1 people love a stack so much they start to develop cool ADDITIONS to it(see the awesomeios repo) to expand on the standard libraries
2 people start to FIX a stack because the implementation is broken, lacking in functionality, hard to use by itself: see okhttp, legit all the Square libs, butterknife etc etc etc and etc
From this I can conclude 2 things: people love developing for IOS because the ecosystem is nice and dev friendly, and people like to develop for Android in spite of how Google manages their API. Seriously Android is a great OS and having apps that work awesomely in spite of how hard it is to create applications for said platform just shows a level of love and dedication that is unmatched.
This is why I find it hard, and even mean to call out on one product over the other. Despite the morals behind the 2 leading companies inferred from my post, the develpers are what makes the situation better or worse.
So just fuck it and develop and use for what you want.
Honorific mention to PHP and the php developer community which is a mixture of fixing and adding in spite of the ammount of hatred that such coolness gets from a lot of peeps :P
Oh and I got a couple of mobile contracts in the way, this is why I made this post.
And I still hate developing for Android even though I love Java.3
WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS THIS SHIT.
In my opinion, companies attention to detail is one of the main things that I use to determine how good they are and if I should use them. This kind of thing where the FUCKING ENGINEERS IGNORE THE ISSUE AND REFUSED TO FIX IT is what really pisses me off. At least companies like apple ship working products while Microsoft is sitting here on their asses trying to make the most money with minimal effort by screwing over their users and repurposing their Windows phone OS for use on laptops. Read: http://answers.microsoft.com/en-us/...4
Sucessfully made two hackintoshes in a span of a week. I think I've made my point apple, at least an effort to care about macs Apple. Who the fuck is gonna make the iOS apps that make your money maker useful?
Fuck you Apple,
A avid user5
What in the name of fuck has apple done to font rendering in macOS Mojave. My fonts used to look the sexiest with the mac font rendering and the retina display in High Sierra.
Now my fonts in the terminal and VSCode look like they got fucking anorexia.
I love everything else they’ve done about Mojave, but this one thing almost kills the deal for me 😡
Long time no rant...
Just fuck apple.
I’m working in partnership with an startup as iOS dev.
We have payments in our app since it was released couple years ago. And everything was ok. Two months ago we implemented a subscription based program that granted our user access to a few things that we need to process manually. I specified that because in apple’s guidelines states that services consumed outside app are not allowed to be sold using inapp purchase and you have to implement your own payment method.
All nice and good we used what we had already in place and the updated was approved. Same for the next 6 versions. Now we discovered a quite critical bug and fixed and submitted a new update just so apple would reject it because we are using subscription that is not implemented using their fucking store kit. So they can’t get those 30% share cut.
Fuck them fuck their echo system fuck their overpriced product. I’v just abandoned my 15” mbp mid2015 in favor of a hackintosh just because my mbp was dying from high temps. Fuck it i’m almost done with mobile development after 6 years2
When your CS group is awol and the project is due in 3 days. But you just got back from spring break so are still drink as fuck off the most delicious Apple cider ever, angry orchards. So In a drunken furor you Google how to write an LL(1) recursive decent parser, all the while screaming into the empty echo chamber of your group slack about how bullshit it is.
I had a good night what about you?
Try to upload ipa archive to iTunes. Service is interrupted. Again. Fuck you apple! I was trying to upload that fuck for six damn u punk ass times. Why apple? Fuck you! I'll put the archive on a stick an ram it right into your ass you shitty fuck! JUST TAKE MY BINARY RIGHT NOW!
Don't take it to serious. I'm okay 😎
No I love them all equally... 😂😂😂😂 ... Ok they are mostly all shit , with security holes, features that don't exist but should, terrible docs .... The worst ones , mainly by Microsoft ie, windows 10 updates , windows servers.... But apple ... Fuck them ... Google .... Manipulating barstards ....
There is good software just you usually have to go through the shit to get them, I mean people normally use ie through lack of knowledge , so educate!
Oh Trump you illiterate fuck! In whos interest is this shit?
What will be next? Banning USA factories like Apple from China? Nobody will profit from it but the whole world can se how big dick you have...16
*me writing my sweet code like nothing bad could happend*
Xcode: bum! Compiling error
Me: what the...
Xcode: yeah right. Bam! Error
*clean, etc. compile again
Xcode: yeah, try your luck looser
Me: ok, let's google it. First stack overflow answer: just change the simulator and should work correctly.
And of course it worked. And that's how it works all day.
Fuck you Xcode! Fuck you Apple!
So I tried to fix an app today that we made for a client ...
It's a Cordova project that's basically jus a wrapper for a certain section of the client's website that's displayed inside an iframe inside said app (with a bit of additional CSS and such). It's all working fine.
The problem is, said scrolling effect inside said iframe does not work inside the iOS version of the app (does, however, when the content of the iframe is viewed (by just visiting the URL) inside Safari), instead, the iframe just scrolls back to top.
So after five and a half hours of depression, anger and rage, also some repetetive cursing towards Apple (just like every time something has to do with their awful products), my boss walks in, looks at me and says:
"I'd be fine with it, if I just had to manually scroll instead".
If it wasn't 5pm already (I usually go home at 6), I would've just left the room / gone home or gotten my salad from the fridge to have something to release my anger on.
Seriously though, what the fuck!?
I hate Windows and I hate Dell.
Apple fucking extorts you but at least it fucking works. macOS works, great UI, unix-like, NO FUCKING INTRUSIVE UPDATES
Did your mac break? We'll replaced, no problem.
Fuck, some company should try to be serious competition to Apple. I'd love to see that day, but untill them I unfortunately have to come back to apple, again and again. Fucking shit.16
Rumor has it that Apple is ditching the startup chime.
Fuck you apple. In the name of innovation you have ruined yourself.
[personal opinions in the comments]4
This is how my macbook keybboard writes the letter "b" it’s not happening all the time though, sometimes it outputs b and and other times bb, wtf I only pressed it once. And it's happening randomly, fuck this shit, I cant even take it to apple customer service and leave it there for a week or more. I guess I'm living with it and don't bbother fixing it. fuck b errr6
I should run a daily cron job for my Mac rants. Today it was just this: I connected to some other iMac over network discovery, but from within in the GUI it is impossible for me to get the IP or any information of that machine. All information it displays you see below. Thanks very helpful. (Only lastly I found the information by pinging administrators-iMac.local)3
Why is iOS debugging so fucking useless? Instead of having a normal stack trace which takes you to the line of code that went wrong it just takes you to the bootstrap line in AppDelegate with a random code and basically says "Fuck you, figure it out yourself". Their stack traces are just as useless. IS THIS WHAT SOME PEOPLE CALL THE PREMIERE DEVELOPMENT EXPERIENCE, GODDAMNIT? at least Swift is nice tho, unlike Objective-C4
Why the fuck did Apple just start testing my app using an ipv6 only network? I mean that is a good idea in general, but did they just start doing this recently, or did a major appledick decide that now, after 15 good releases, they should reject the app and force me to rethink my whole backend structure... Screw you, why didn't you tell me when I started?2
Pushing all store builds for a tiny change that "shouldn't" break anything but testing only on 1 device on 1 OS.
Apple testing just takes too long, fuck em.
all this fucking cloud sync bullshit on mac, iOS, and windows is driving me nuts... would all be fine if it only would work as expected -.-1
Am I the only one who thinks that Apple loves fucking over its developers? Besides for the yearly fee, they seem to release iPhones with drastically different screen dimensions, which forces devs to make their apps compatible with a new layout. I can't imagine the nightmare this causes for devs of games, which often have custom UIs.
First we have the change to a taller screen dimension for absolutely no fucking reason, then there was a display size increase, and now there's curved corners and the top of the display extends on both sides but not the middle.
That last bit must make for some really fucked up design decisions. Who the fuck thought that a partial screen would be a good idea? Screens would cost a ton more and would be substantially harder to replace. Not to mention how screen protectors will be less likely to stay on...
IMO this is just as bad as Android version fragmentation. 😒2
Another Mojave Post...
Apple added 4 new apps, all of which cannot be removed (oh boy am I off to a great start). I saw the new home app and thought "if your stuck here I might as well attempt to put you to some use" so I opened it to try and maybe add my smart plug or something, but it told me I need an iOS device to add accessories...
Why the fuck is there any functionality that is locked behind iOS especially something as integral to the core functionality of the app like adding a fucking device to an app that manages them.
On a side note apparently news is bugged for me and I cannot find it it the launchpad so that's slightly less bloat.2
We should stop giving fucks about what product company X made and how much they're selling it for. Buy whatever the fuck you want or need.
Those apple iPhone X rants are getting annoying.
Fuck you apple!!!
I wanted to add some old audiobooks I have in mp3 format to my wife's Iphone...
Ok, connect it to the computer. No direct file transfer. Start iTunes...updates... Import library..ok.. it's imported locally but sync then???
Sync purchases.. no
Mark stuff and move.. no way (got it playing in chrome somehow when trying to unmark everything)
Got to "buy stuff now page".. close it iTunes.. start it again and come back to same page..
Then I.. shamefuly Google "transfered audiobook iPhone" and got all the pages how to sync when you already bought items from appstore...
Eventually I transfered the files folder by folder. There is probably a better way to do this but I were at the ends of my rope so I archive this as a narrow win.2
Question to you all, do you really think you own your computer or system/data when almost all sites/services out there state very clearly in there ELUA(Fuck yes ours) that they might use your data how they feel fit, now this does not stop with websites, Mac, Windows and some Linux Distros also do this.
I for one stop thinking that I own data but I just change a few bits to make it look different these days, everything on your computer is not yours, we its and hardware, read the ELUA/TOS many hold the right to recall, revoke and so on use of the items to the point you paid for it they will take it back.
Items now sending keylogs, data usage and apps usage data to MS, Apple, some big linux distro, and YES this happens don't fool yourself Apple and MS both admit this happen and both US and UK now requesting these companies to let the have full access to this data, if it was not there they wouldn't want it.
This wont stop me from messing with code and loving tech but do you really feel you own anything anymore?
I don't :P7
Made an app for a client on both iOS and Android, published the the app on app store and google play at the same time week ago, google published the app within 2 hours, apple still though, WHY THE FUCK WE PAY THEM 99$ LER YEAR BRUH, THEY NEED A CERTIFICATE OF OWNER SHIP ON THE APP BRAND NAME SMH, CHANGE THIS AND THAT, FUCK THIS SHIT 2 WEEKS TO PUBLISH AN APP AND MY CLIENT IS YELLING WTF3