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Got this from a recruiter:
We are looking for a **Senior Android Developer/Lead** at Philadelphia PA
Hiring Mode: Contract
Must have skills:
· 10-12 years mobile experience in developing Android applications
· Solid understanding of Android SDK on frameworks such as: UIKit, CoreData, CoreFoundation, Network Programming, etc.
· Good Knowledge on REST Ful API and JSON Parsing
· Good knowledge on multi-threaded environment and grand central dispatch
· Advanced object-oriented programming and knowledge of design patterns
· Ability to write clean, well-documented, object-oriented code
· Ability to work independently
· Experience with Agile Driven Development
· Up to date with the latest mobile technology and development trends
· Passion for software development- embracing every challenge with a drive to solve it
· Engaging communication skills
My response:
I am terribly sorry but I am completely not interested in working for anyone who might think that this is a job description for an Android engineer.
1. Android was released in September 2008 so finding anyone with 10 years experience now would have to be a Google engineer.
2. UIKit, CoreData, CoreFoundation are all iOS frameworks
3. Grand Central Dispatch is an iOS mechanism for multithreading and is not in Android
4. There are JSON parsing frameworks, no one does that by hand anymore
Please delete me from your emailing list.50 -
Will the bug in my code please stand up?
I repeat
Will the bug in my code please stand up?
I think we have a problem here.
*music intensifies*11 -
I met one of my friend from my childhood he asked me what I do for a living.
I told him : "I am a full stack developer"
He : What does that mean? What you have to do in office?
Me: I write code for websites in very simple words.
He: Like facebook?
Me: yes, exactly.
He: So you work for windows?
Me: What makes you think that?
He: Aren't websites comes with the computer?
Me: I am so unfortunate to meet you.13 -
Junior job requirements be like:
Required:
5 year experience in Php,
8 years experience in JavaScript,
Masters degree in CS,
10 years experience in React and or AngularJS
Bonuses:
Worked for Microsoft in their first year.
Salary: 20k/PA 6 month performance review.9 -
This should probably be labeled a meme, but I'm going to actually rant about this meme.
People use the term hacker way too frequently. Solving your trashy fucking "Pa$$w0rd123" password and getting access to your Spotify account isn't hacking.
Same douchewaffle probably thinks you could hack a Facebook account in 30 seconds. I fucking hate the way movies have portrayed hacking and created a dramatized bullshit idea for people to believe is real.
21 -
1) Stop going to univershity
2) Started python coding at home from online courses.
3) Got the best paid job among batchmates.14 -
If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail!
This was something which my tech lead used to tell me when I was so obsessed with nosql databases a few years back. I would try to find problems to solve that has a use case for nosql databases or even try to convince me(I didn’t realise it back then) that I need to use nosql db for this new idea that I have, without really thinking deep enough whether the data in question is better represented using an sql schema or not.
Now, leading a team of young developers, I come across similar suggestions from few of my team members who just discovered this new and shiny tech and want to use it in production projects.
While I am not against new and shiny, it’s not a good practice to jump right in to it without exploring it deep enough or considering all the shortcomings. The most important question to ask is, whether some of the problems you are trying to solve can be solved with the current stack.
Modifying your stack requires more than just a week’s experience of playing around with the getting started guide and stack overflow replies. This is something which need to be carefully considered after taking inputs from the people who would be supporting it, that include operations, sysadmins and teams that are gonna interface with your stack indirectly.
I am not talking about delaying adoption by waiting for long list of approvals to get some thing that would bring immediate value, but a carefully orchestrated plan for why and how to migrate to a new stack.
Just because one of the tech giants made a move to a new stack and wrote about it in their engineering blog doesn’t mean that you need to make a switch in the same direction. Take a moment to analyse the possible reasons that motivated them to do it, ask yourself if your organisation is struggling with the exact same problems, observe how others facing the same issue are addressing it, and then make an informed decision.
Collect enough data to support your proposal.
Ask yourself again if you are the one holding the hammer.
If the answer is no, forge ahead!
9 -
API Guy.
He has a serious regex problem.
Regexes are never easy to read, but the ones he uses just take the cake. They're either blatantly wrong, or totally over-engineered garbage that somehow still lacks basic functionality. I think "garbage" here is a little too nice, since you can tell what garbage actually is/was without studying it for five minutes.
In lieu of an actual rant (mostly because I'm overworked), I'll just leave a few samples here. I recommend readying some bleach before you continue reading.
Not a valid url name regex:
VALID_URL_NAME_REGEX = /\A[\w\-]+\Z/
Semi-decent email regex: (by far the best of the four)
VALID_EMAIL_REGEX = /\A[\w+\-.]+@[a-z\d\-.]+\.[a-z]+\z/i
Over-engineered mess that only works for (most) US numbers:
VALID_PHONE_REGEX = /1?\s*\W?\s*([2-9][0-8][0-9])\s*\W?\s*([2-9][0-9]{2})\s*\W?\s*([0-9]{4})(\se?x?t?(\d*))?/
and for the grand finale:
ZIP_CODE_REGEX = /(^\d{5}(-\d{4})?$)|(^[ABCEGHJKLMNPRSTVXY]{1}\d{1}[A-Z]{1} *\d{1}[A-Z]{1}\d{1}$)|GIR[ ]?0AA|((AB|AL|B|BA|BB|BD|BH|BL|BN|BR|BS|BT|CA|CB|CF|CH|CM|CO|CR|CT|CV|CW|DA|DD|DE|DG|DH|DL|DN|DT|DY|E|EC|EH|EN|EX|FK|FY|G|GL|GY|GU|HA|HD|HG|HP|HR|HS|HU|HX|IG|IM|IP|IV|JE|KA|KT|KW|KY|L|LA|LD|LE|LL|LN|LS|LU|M|ME|MK|ML|N|NE|NG|NN|NP|NR|NW|OL|OX|PA|PE|PH|PL|PO|PR|RG|RH|RM|S|SA|SE|SG|SK|SL|SM|SN|SO|SP|SR|SS|ST|SW|SY|TA|TD|TF|TN|TQ|TR|TS|TW|UB|W|WA|WC|WD|WF|WN|WR|WS|WV|YO|ZE)(\d[\dA-Z]?[ ]?\d[ABD-HJLN-UW-Z]{2}))|BFPO[ ]?\d{1,4}/
^ which, by the way, doesn't match e.g. Australian zip codes. That cost us quite a few sales. And yes, that is 512 characters long.47 -
Project manager: how was the day?
Me: wrote a few lines of code
Me: ran the code
Me: full of errors
Me: I cried8 -
Yo.
His palms are sweaty
Knees weak arms are heavy
Bugs littering his code already
Cold spaghetti 🍝
He’s nervous but on the surface he looks calm and ready to git push
(Hit a blank with thinking of code-related lyrics, anyone got ideas?)16 -
If I changed girlfriends as often as I changed JavaScript libraries, I'd still be looking for a girlfriend.
Cuz I try and avoid using JavaScript.7 -
my habit to inspect any nicely done apps to understand how they achieve such greatness, I never felt more welcome when I visit the console, until i found Quizlet.
great place to leave easter eggs.. :)
3 -
Ask questions during interview.
Ask about trainings - it's usually a good sign when company offers training budget. Ask about specifics - sometimes it's a shared pluralsight account, and nothing else, which means that that had an idea and half assed it into existence.
Ask tech recruiter about overtime, a good sign is when they have no idea or say that it must be budgeted and scheduled - it means that it does not happen often.
Ask if it is possible to select and change projects, and how often it happens - if often, it may be bad low level management, or people learning new things and jumping between projects.
Also make sure to ask about rules for promotions and pay rises. Good company wił have a clear set of rules in place.
All of the above apply to mid to large companies.
For small company, i'm sure it will be different.3 -
Was asked to make an e-sign system that manipulates PDFs to insert an image and the date at different coordinates on x number of different pages.
200 hours later, it was done. Now I'm the PDF guy2 -
I thought meditation was more like putting myself in “airplane mode”. But in reality it felt more like a DDoS attack!
3 -
Successful startup message on my friends discord bot:
Yo
His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy
There's vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti.
Bot Ready.
😂
https://github.com/nbd9/PastaBot -
Team: Qt doesn’t let us build the UX we have in mind. Web is the future.
Me: what do you guys recommend ?
Team: Electron! We vote for Electron!
Me: Alright, who know JavaScript here?
Team: ...9 -
I just hate it when clients with no knowledge of developing says I'm looking for "more professional"
FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!
Somebody did that with dedication and you can't just call it that!!
SCREW YOU!!!
😡😡😡😡😡15 -
Dont get attached to your code at work! Coz it's not your code, you got paid for writing that code and that's it.5
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I never touch my code if anyone else have made changes in them without asking me.
I cry like a bitch when I get home.6 -
Just received a job invitation for my first developer position. But I never wrote a line of code in my life. I guess my interviewer too.8
-
How I met python
[long read but worth]
There's nothing wrong with falling in love with a programming language for her looks. I mean, let's face it - Python does have a rockin' body of modules, and a damn good set of utilities and interpreters on various platforms. Her whitespace-sensitive syntax is easy on the eyes, and it's a beautiful sight to wake up to in the morning after a long night of debugging. The way she sways those releases on a consistent cycle - she knows how to treat you right, you know?
But let's face it - a lot of other languages see the attention she's getting, and they get jealous. Really jealous. They try and make her feel bad by pointing out the GIL, and they try and convince her that she's not "good enough" for parallel programming or enterprise-level applications. They say that her lack of static typing gives her programmers headaches, and that as an interpreted language, she's not fast enough for performance-critical applications.
She hears what those other, older languages like Java and C++ say, and she thinks she's not stable or mature enough. She hears what those shallow, beauty-obsessed languages like Ruby say, and she thinks she's not pretty enough. But she's trying really hard, you know? She hits the gym every day, trying to come up with new and better ways of JIT'ing and optimizing. She's experimenting with new platforms and compilation techniques all the time. She wants you to love her more, because she cares.
But then you hear about how bad she feels, and how hard she's trying, and you just look into her eyes, sighing. You take Python out for a walk - holding her hand - and tell her that she's the most beautiful language in the world, but that's not the only reason you love her.
You tell her she was raised right - Guido gave her core functionality and a deep philosophy she's never forgotten. You tell her you appreciate her consistent releases and her detailed and descriptive documentation. You tell her that she has a great set of friends who are supportive and understanding - friends like Google, Quora, and Facebook. And finally, with tears in your eyes, you tell her that with her broad community support, ease of development, and well-supported frameworks, you know she's a language you want to be with for a long, long time.
After saying all this, you look around and notice that the two of you are alone. Letting go of Python's hand, you start to get down on one knee. Her eyes get wide as you try and say the words - but she just puts her finger on your lips and whispers, "Yes".
The moon is bright. You know things are going to be okay now.10 -
Expectation: I'm going to spend today debugging my app
Reality: adds 10 new features, 30 got commits and some Easter eggs. No bugs fixed. -
Fffffuuuucccckkkkkkkkkk!!
My team and I had a presentation scheduled and we worked on it for more than a month.
A bloody fucking month long preparation.
We went through multiple reviews with stakeholders which weren't necessary and no other team does.
I put on some music to lift up my energy levels while I waited anxiously.
Show time.
We have one of the largest city festival going on this week.
The community in neighbouring building started reciting prayers out loud on a PA system just when the presentation began.
~40 folks and me struggling on video to not lose my cool and fuck my luck, I went nervous because I couldn't focus.
That's when my big boss pointed out that there some background noise and I had to explain it to them.
My very first presence and I forgot to even introduce myself. What a nut head I am.
I am annoyed and angry at myself. I perform well impromptu over planned and preparedness.
Thankfully my team mate who talks a lot and my designer, handled things well and saved the day.
Massive respect for them and kick in nuts for me.
Uuugggghhh!!
Also my neighbour is renovating his entire house and since I am using it as my workspace, I literally sit in between junk and cement and wires all around.
What a messy wasted day it was.19 -
Before new years eve I prepared a sheet on google sheets that allowed people to add drink recipes and order drinks (specify how many of each drink they want), calculated part of budget each person had to cover and generated shopping list of drink components with exact amounts needed.
It was more fun to make that thing than to attend the party.1 -
So... as a follow-up to my previous rant (https://www.devrant.io/rants/899731)
I happened across this today and started giggling internally.
Enjoy
1 -
How many programmers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
It doesn't matter. Its a hardware problem not a software problem...1 -
Inspiration to code kicks in!
Kids asleep, everybody’s asleep, house is quiet. The kind of peace ive always wanted and wished! (Parents here will understand.)
Get to my laptop, opened up code editor, start fresh and clean! Created new file, about to type my first code and.........blood dripping from my nose. It doesn’t stop there, its like flowing for a while!
I noticed it keeps flowing while im projecting the inner excitement to code. When my mind drifted a bit, the nose bleeding stops. Wth? Its like my body is ejaculating when im excited to code, yeah.. it ls blood shot out of my nose, wtf!
...and i have to stop what im doing. Then the ideas just spoofly gone. Suddenly i dont know why im staring at an empty code editor.. (what was im about to code again?) i totally cant recall, it simply gone. Damn it. That could be a million dollar apps! Wish i can go back to an hour ago and record myself when i received that historic inspirational moment. 😔9 -
TL;DR; windows XP + bat scripts + fascination about being able to make things yourself.
I was born and raised in a village. And the thing about living in a village is that you are free :) Among all the other freedoms you are also free to build your own solutions to various domestic problems, i.e. to build stuff. This is one of the things that fascinates me about living outside the city.
When I finally was old enough (and had the means to, i.e. a computer) to understand that programming is something that allows you to build your own solutions to computer problems, it got to me.
With win 3.1 I was still too fresh and too young. With win 95 I was more interested in playing with neighbours outdoors. With win 98 I was a bit too busy at school. But with win XP the time had come. I started writing automation solutions for windows administration using .bat scripts (.vbs was and still is somewhat repelling to me). I no longer needed to browse Russian forums and torrent sites to find a solution to a problem I had! That was amazing!!! [esp. when my Russian was very weak].
That was the time when I built my first sort-of-malware - a bat script downloading and installing Radmin server, uploading computer's IP and admin credentials to my FTP.
I loved it!
However, I'd stumbled upon may obstacles when writing with batch. I googled a lot and most of the solutions I found were in bash (something related to Linux, which was a spooky mystery to me back then). Eventually, I got my courage together and installed ubuntu. Boy was I sorry... Nothing was working. I was unable to even boot the thing! Not to mention the GUI...
Years later I tried again with ubuntu [7.10 I think.. or 7.04] on my Pavilion. Took me a looooot of attempts but I got there. I could finally boot it. A couple of weeks later I managed to even start the GUI! I could finally learn bash and enjoy the spectacular Compiz effects (that cube was amazing).
I got into bash and Linux for the next several years. And then I thought to myself - wait, I'm writing scripts that automate other programs. Wouldn't it be cool I I could write my own programs that did exactly what I wanted and did not need automation? It definitely would! I could write a program that would make sound work (meaning no more ALSA/PA headaches!), make graphics work on my hardware, make my USB audio card to be set to primary once connected and all the other amazing things! No more automation -- just a single program or all of that!
little did the naive me knew :)
I started with python. I didn't like that syntax from the beginning :/ those indentations...
Then I tried java. Bucky (thenewboston), who likes tuna sandwiches, on my phone all the free time I had. I didn't learn anything :/ Even tried some java 101 e-book. Nothing helped until I decided to write some simple project (nothing fancy - just some calculations for a friend who was studying architecture).
I loved it! It sounds weird, but I found Swing amazing too. With that layout manager where you have to manually position all the components :)
and then things happened and I quit my med studies and switched to programming. Passed my school exams I was missing to enter the IT college and started inhaling every bit of info about IT I could get my hands on (incl outside the college ofc).
A few more stepping stones, a few more irrelevant jobs to pay my bills in the city, and I got to where I am now.5 -
Job ad title: "junior Php developer position £20k-£25k/pa"
Job ad body: "5+ years experience required in Php, JavaScript, html 5, css, experience in laravel, Vue and react."
🤔9 -
Me ( a python dev) pointing to a good java joke in dev rant to my brother who happens to be working at TCS for the past 5 years as a Java Developer...
Me: Java is shit...
He: huh java is the best! every language in the world is written over java. My manager said this.
Me: I think I will kill him today in his sleep.4 -
OKAY
WHO THE FUCK DESIGNED THIS STUPID ANDROID EMULATOR.
ALL I WANT TO DO IS LISTEN TO MY MUSIC WHILE PROGRAMMING
BUT NOOOOOOO
WHENEVER THE FUCKING EMULATOR IS OPEN THE QUALITY OF THE MUSIC IN MY BLUETOOTH HEADPHONES GOES TO aBsOluTe SHIT.
CMON GUYS. GET YOUR HEADPHONES OUT OF YOUR ASS AND TEST YOUR FUCKING SOFTWARE12 -
Work of a my co-workers good work! It's called colspan you dumb fuck! Best part is that no way I'm changing this coz I work in place where they don't give a fuck about code quality! So fuck it!
6 -
If you didn't became a developer what would you be? What's your plan B?
Mine is to be a psychologist.38 -
My code be like:
Call the method cronk...
WROOOONG MEEETTTTTTTHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDD!!!
*climbs out of alligator pit*
Why do we even have that method -
Even though I have 500 reputation on StackOverflow I'm afraid to ask a question! Coz other devs can be really down right mean! No one knows everything, we are all here to learn. Some ppl don't understand that they too started like this.2
-
What if you were asked to develop something that goes against your morals or beliefs. Would you do it?
PS - they are willing to pay you more that you ask for29 -
Just found this awesome function in the old commits.
def clean_cache():
'''
This function cleans the stored cache in every update. Make sure to call it before every feature addition.
'''
print 'Cache is cleared. '
return2 -
I used to think I was the kind of programmer that was good with people. That somehow I was special because I could get on with colleagues and make clients happy.
But fuck people. It’s so easy to be nice, just don’t be not nice. Don’t say rude things and be surprised when I’ve had enough.
For some reason my latest colleagues think it’s too confrontational to talk to each other and instead give management anonymous feedback on who they don’t get on with. Which obviously gets fed back to everyone immediately.
I’m done putting on a smile. Elegant code speaks for itself. I’m getting a PA to talk to people from now on because fuck this.3 -
Started a new job last week. Pays a tad below average for position, but i get training time and budget for anything i want.
So far i have had few days of company introduction, and now a week for training courses related to position.
I have not seen any code yet, brought no value in, just joined.
Massive green flag to me. -
When you got hired
HR: please come to us if there's any problems related work so that we can give a solution.
After years of working you send a mail with you problems, it's been months. Still no reply! And try to avoid conversation regarding that problem.2 -
Have you had any money saved? What is your process when it comes to saving money? What kind of investments did you do with your savings?15
-
That feeling when you spend hours trying to fix something, only to give up.
Then you come back he next day and find you were missing a comma...1 -
FUCKING HELL!
I just shutdown my computer after deciding to leave the unfinished feature that I started a couple hours ago for tomorrow.
Not 5 fucking minuets later I had found a solution in my head but now don’t want to spend the time to turn my computer on to fix it. Ugh1 -
Got hooooot pink coloured pair of beats for my birthday!!! Best gift ever! Two most things I like is music and code this is the perfect gift! Pink is the only problem but fuck it. I love theseeeee!!!
19 -
Yesterday was a day off so I developed a vue, vuex , laravel application. Today back to work and start writing some shity code!1
-
I've been asking myself this question for a while lately.
Can I combine the music coming out of my phone with the sound from games on my PC?
"Why?", you ask.
Because I want it!
So I started reading man pages and documentation about ALSA and PA. A couple of hours later it just works. I don't know how or why, but I did it, all by myself, because no one does such weird stuff.
I'm way too excited about this.10 -
I would like to see a full stack developer version of it.
Found this on 9gag it's fucking hilarious...
-
Hey DevRant Fam! Hope everyone is doing very well!, I’ve been browsing job posts lately... I’m just finishing off my 2nd year in uni, and i came across this beauty by a company called “WestBury Partners” these blokes are based in Sydney’s CBD i believe and they’re offering what seems to be 200k+pa now as a junior that seems quite difficult to get but anything is possible
Though I’ve seen the requirements and I’m not sure I understand some of them, one i seem to have and understand is having a high level of passion in software development but the rest i don’t know much about 😅🤓.
Are these guys looking for “unicorns”? I am interested in trading software and how they work, i love learning new things i will attach a screen shot of the page :-).
Hope everyone has an amazing day or night wherever you may be! Also I very much thank you for reading my post it means a lot to me!
Best wishes ❤️
Milo
16 -
This is just a temporary workaround. I will come back to this and fix this later. NEVER HAPPENS :)3
-
can't believe it but things actually have started to fall into place on their own, career-wise. feels unreal. need to work enough to afford a cottage with a cobblestone path & my life will be complete2
-
Company i work for just posted updated pay rates.
It's good. They went from lower end of spectrum to a little above the average in terms of pay, and benefits stay the same - solid. -
what is the point of having massive HR departments if something as expected and frequent as university hiring can't go smoothly?
i managed to reach the interview round for a big 4 firm only for the interviewer to not show up for 4 hours from my time slot (i waited the entire time - took periodic screenshots for proof), HR to say "we'll reschedule your interview, this happened because of internal miscommunication" more than THREE months ago, and dip. until december they'd repeat the same. now they've ghosted. thanks, virtual hiring.
how is it the candidate's fault? found out this isn't rare by speaking to a few others from my network who i knew were interviewing for the same firm. for students whose lives can change completely based on the outcome of an opportunity that they came across due to sheer luck and could definitely make use of because of their hard work - this is so heartbreaking and demotivating.1 -
my fist job... i get to edit a c++ code written by a (mind you) programming company that they teamed with for the past(mind you again) 3 years ...
now just for starters, this code was edited by self taught coders that are really good engineers(they are really good), that didnt really know how the code worked before yet they still changed it, and it worked, how ever they wanted some changes.
i get the project files, and there is not one single comment describing what is happening... only code commented out... and no documentation what so ever were done....
so below are some of my comments that i wrote after i finished adding what i had to add, and fixing what i had to fix:
/*first rule of C anything coding, no actual functions in the header, well let me introduce you to a fully functioning thread running program all in the header, enjoy*/
//used to control the thread
// i honestly dont know why, but it worked soooooo yea...
// TG uncommented // for absolutely no reason what so ever...
//used to communicate with the port
//the message to be sent to the inverter, which has a code that will handle it
//hmmmmmm...
//again not usefull since we are using radioButtons
// same ...
// same ...
// same ...
// they said they dont even use this mode, but none the less, same ...
// calculate the checksum for the message
// ....
// one of the things that work, and god forbids i touch
// used for the status displayed on screen
// used for the (censored :P) status in the message
// used for the (censored :P) status in the message
// not used at all, but the message structure contains it and i refuse to edit that abomination
// used for the (censored :P) status in the message
// used for the (censored :P) status in the message
// just dont ask and roll with it, i didnt want to touch this
// saaaaame ...
// if before true this saaaaaame ...
// value of the (censored :P)
// it pains me to say it again, but this is no use
// (censored :P) input
// (censored :P) input
// only place seen , like for real it was just defined,sooooo yea :D
// well you know how it is
// message string
// check sum string
/****below from feed back****/
// (censored :P) coming in
// (censored :P) coming in
// (censored :P) coming in
// (censored :P)
/****below is the output to the receiver ****/
//(censored :P)
// (censored :P)
// (censored :P)
// (censored :P)
//you thought we were done.... nope, no idea. it comes in the feedback
// not used, literally commented out the one time it was used
// same ...
// XD, man this is a blast, same ...
// nope ...
// used to store the port chosen for the communication
// is a static for the number of data we have recorded so far, and as a row indicator for the recording method
// used to indicate the page we are on in the excel file, as well as the point in physical point in the test
// same ... oh look at this a positive same :D
// same ...
// same ...6 -
Did you ever take advantage of clients that has less computer literacy? Like have you ever escape a bug in the system by telling the client heavy technical BS! 😋
PS - fixings that bug later obviously!!6 -
Full stack isn’t about knowing just a backend and little bit of JavaScript. Turns out a bunch of them who applied this week seem it have derived a new meaning for it!
Throwing around terms like “I am exploring MEAN” doesn’t make you sound cool unless you have some working examples that you have built with it.
7 -
WHAT COCKSUCKING LUNATICS DECIDED TO MAKE A PDF ONLY ABLE TO DOWNLOAD WITH JAVASCRIPT.
I CANT DOWNLOAD YOUR FUCKING PDFS TO SIGN BY TONIGHT BECAUSE ALL I HAVE IS MY IPad. WHICH DOESNT FUCKING HAVE JAVASCRIPT
THERE IS A TIME AND A PLACE TO USE JAVASCRIPT AND THIS IS NOT ONE OF THEM. GO CASTRATE YOURSELF WITH A RUSTY KNIFE5 -
Why do I find really hard to connect with my coworkers?! I'm an introvert but after few months in my old job I connected with everyone. In my new job I find it really hard! And it's almost a year! 😥😫5
-
Hardest thing for me as Team leader is to teach people in my team, that task is done, when unit tests are written, pull request is created, approved and merged.
Not when their code compiles for a first time.1 -
Not leaning on unit tests. I usually write them after testing my code manually, and lose time for testing feature by hand.1
-
...It relies on the BouncyCastle cryptography library instead of OpenSSL, yet replicates OpenSSL bugs to guarantee compatibility.2
-
No matter how many times, or whichever way I explain, he still doesn't get it. Are people so fucking blinkered they do not want to listen, or even read what you write. Back story, produced some web design visuals for a client, and fortunately he had the good sense to listen and employ a copywriter. She had the first draft done when i was putting together the styling, so i placed actual copy on the visuals. 2 weeks pass, still no answer. I send the same email to him, every 4 days and cc his PA for good measure. Finally, he says he wants to make some tweaks to the copy. I explain that any copy changes can be done via the CMS once the site is built, and can I proceed and build the site? He replies I need to make changes to the copy first. I explained again about the difference between the visual and the actual website, same response. You Fucking Infuriate me! Cunt!
-
Hmmm! So I'm passive aggressive person. I don't argue with my fellow devs I post the their faults on devRant!
-
So my current PC is named the tesseract for its power and squareish case shape.
I just had a thought that if I ever seriously upgrade it or build a new PC, I should name it Thanos...2 -
You don't! Working for a bad company would ultimately give you the experience you need that a good company wouldn't2
-
The later I Stay up, the more wrappers appear next to my computer in the morning...
Funny how that works....1 -
Stick to one project about which you want to learn but don't know how to do it,complete it...and now you have learnt something new
-
Mine was at my school when I was 13 or 15. I didn't have a computer at home because my parents could not offered a one. Back then I didn't know any thing about computers but always knew that I wanted to do something related to computers.
So, when I went to the computer lab in my school I was so dumb, I couldn't even click on a button using the mouse. We were partnered up two students per computer and me try so hard use a computer and my partner take over and show off his talent how he can use a computer.
I was sad and devastated even though I love computer I couldn't use a computer but my willingness to learn about computers science never faded a away!
Few years fast forward; I'm a web developer and I'm happy with what I do. The fellow student who showed off still contact me for his trouble shootings regarding computers.
Never give up on you dreams -
every day my boss says he'll review the requirements for our product. every day he forgets to do so. every day he asks where the update for the next stage is. every day i remind him. every day he forg ---2
-
How do you decide whether or not a program should be written to solve a problem or do some work?
Related to: https://devrant.com/rants/952746/...1 -
do you know: victoria's secret higher ranking executive from scranton, pa was a lesbian who humped women prostitutes and since has been replaced by one of your pod people.
but the song from this time period about victoria's secret, is kind of funny, since one of the higher level executives was a woman and apparently enjoyed young women in lingerie as much as men do :P4 -
I have switched from Chrome to Firefox in steps to de-google myself. I missed some of the features but I found a workaround apart from the Chrome Netflix Extended extension. I binge watch lots of Netflix series and after a while seeing intro again and again quite frustrates me. With Chrome, I didn't have to worry about that but with Firefox there weren't any add-ons which works properly so this weekend I decided to make my own.
If you are a Firefox user, please give it a try and let me know.
https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/...
If you like to contribute -
https://github.com/chamra/netcham2 -
So this horrible client micromanaging every single thing in the application now suddenly asking me where a menu should go! I'm like why are you asking me that now I think you should take the menu and shove it up your ass?2
-
I will train myself to be an avenger. In case things went wrong like ultron.
Anyone wanna join me?
Write your superpowers.3 -
I stumbled upon series of stories about serial killer/system administrator addicted to lager and onion bahjits who hates users, managers, beancounters and sales people.
I'm just gonna leave it here https://theregister.com/data_centre...1 -
4am writing an assignment about the ethics of anonymity tools (TOR, VPNs, brown bags to put on your head)
I love the subject – I picked it – but these written assignments for peripheral classes are the most soul sucking part of studying software engineering2 -
When you put bread in the toaster then start programming and forget about it.
*finds it 6 hours later*
Ooh! Free food! -
anyone from the York/Lancaster, PA area? I'm moving out there in two weeks for my first full time software engineering job!1
-
What do you think the best antergos desktop is? I'm looking for one that's relatively fast and lightweight but that looks nice.3
-
Hey guys, I am implementing some integration tools for Blokchains and planning to make it SaaS ( Software as a Service ). The biggest problem for me is to generate a unique name for that project. Can you help me?3
-
"We're excited to announce that we've disabled the deprecated Storefront Toolkit by default for new....."
I am also so freaking "excited" that you have also disabled the close button on the popup when you login to Salesforce BM genius.
How the hell i am suppose to use SFBM now?!! developer tool to remove the popup markup?!
Learn more?? I don't need FAQ doc, I need the popup closed!!!
3 -
If I made a website that was like a fill-in-the-blank for writing documentation, would anyone use it?
I'm trying to justify spending my time doing this.5 -
So our software clubs discord bot went rogue and deleted a metric ass ton of messages
This is what I get for testing in production. Fml1 -
Consider,
```
namespace A;
macro m00 a,b;
··display a,b;
end macro;
macro m01 a;
··m00 a,$0A;
end macro;
m01 $24;
end namespace;
```
OUT: $0A24 ("$\n").
Ah, but you just HAD to fuck me in the ass, didncha fasm2? Initializing anal bleeding:
```
namespace B;
A.m01 $24;
end namespace;
```
OUT: illegal instruction 'm00'.
Explanation: macros carry no context, and so 'm00' is unreachable from 'B' namespace.
Could I maybe write a code-capture macro to generate a wrapper that resets the namespace? Yes, and in fact, I did; brilliant exercise in mystical mindfuckery.
But why try so hard? Just pass the fucking ref, like a MAN.
EXPLICIT CTX, BITCH.
```
define @CAS $non; current addressing space
define %ICE @CAS;
macro self:PA&; recursive macro, uuuh spooky-spooky
··match ice , %ICE;
····; self->proc(args)
····match =-=> proc (args) , PA;
······path.proc ice,args; pass ref and args
····; ^self->proc()
····else match =-=> proc () , PA;
······path.proc ice; pass ref only
····; ^sneaky sneaky. set current context when self ctx;
····else match cas , @CAS;
······%ICE equ cas.PA;
····end match;
··end match;
end macro;
```
ALL TOGETHER NOW
```
namespace A;
macro m00 ice,a,b;
··display a,b;
end macro;
macro m01 ice,a;
··self->m00(a,$0A); could also be 'ice.m00 ice,a,$0A' lmao
end macro;
end namespace;
namespace B;
self A; set ice
self->m01($24);
restore %ICE; back to previous
end namespace;
```
OUT: $0A24 ("$\n").
A-há, now **I** got you from behind motherfucker!
Final note: this is 100% perl DNA seeping through the cracks of my sanity and into a fresh fasm2 framework. Why? Dingle-dongle-jungle-berries, that's why. Also crack.
Have a nice wallop.31 -
Question for all the security/privacy nerds here. What is your opinion of the social network called Minds that pays you for your information basically.
(This is a very brief probably inaccurate summary but yeah, it’s basically reverse Facebook)1 -
Is there a way to implement Google analytics to a specific page.
So, my requirement is to let the user add his/her Google analytics to their page on my application. The page is in sub-route of the application (user/username)
Can I allow a user to do that? Are there any articles related to this?10 -
Send an email.
Or, more seriously: invite only people who must be there, and can add something to the discussion, have an agenda, stick to it, and plan the meeting so that it ends at the start of lunch break. That way everybody will be interested in finishing on time or earlier. -
what are personal projects if not the daughters of hackathon solutions that never saw the light of day6
-
When I started at my first job I was a fanboy for a co-worker who writes codes like nothing and there's is nothing he can not do when comes to coding!! I really admire his work. I always think how does he do it?!
Now I have a fanboy for my work 😎 he admires my work he thinks that there's nothing I can't solve.
I get it now, it's just experience and practice!5 -
Working on some documentations on MS word and I'm pressing ctrl+space for auto complete!!🤣🤣🤣 Not only that ctrl+click for multiple cursor!!! 😂😂😂😂😂2
-
I spent ~12h working on a simple issue/bug.
7h was spent on rebuilding local dev environment which is a clusterfuck of maven profiles, tomcat, some autogenerated degeneracy, and 2 different build systems for JS.
5h spent on actual bug fixing, code reviews and so on.
FML2 -
So I quit my last job because they were only focusing on developing invoicing and inventory control systems. It was really boring same old thing every day!!
When I started my current job they were developing CMS and web solutions. But recently management is considering to develop invoicing and inventory control systems (which now I HATE ).
WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE THERE'S MORE THAT!!!!
😫🙄😡😠7 -
No matter what right thing you did, what right cause you fought, in the end, you will always have to lose..you will always be the bad guy.
-
Ok! My new project still haven't started and I'm so bored , running out things to look into!!!
So far I have looked into
Firebase
Ethical Hacking
Some web developing concept...
Any suggestions??? Related to web developing, laravel , vuejs ???1 -
I am currently going to start data structures and algorithms in python...
suggest me a roadmap according to your experience1 -
Just had the opportunity to watch movie Searching on Netflix.
It was a seriously intense movie, until this scene.. 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
-
Got pissed that my story delayed the whole project by 3 weeks (major story, lots of changes, and management decided to put me in a few extra activities outside of the project).
Stayed up until like 23:00 to deliver PR.1 -
I don't know game development but idk I accepted an offer for game development competition..
the fuck I didn't even knew how to make one...
Now I. am working with Ursina Engine....
even the code on google does not work........1 -
!rant
Does anyone know of any open source personal assistants that aren't storing data? Im looking for a replacement for Googles pa on Android but am also curious if one exists for desktop. If one of those don't exist let's get on thaat2 -
need more experience for good entry-level jobs, need a good entry-level job for more experience. yay4
-
I caught up a scammer last night he was doing some astrology and stuff.
He asked for money......
I gave him a grabify link.....
He gave me his location(accidentally)and told me to teach him the trick....
He wasn't even scared -
https://m.facebook.com/story.php/...
WATCH NOW THANK LATER. (It’s rubber duck related)
Sorry about the Facebook video4 -
Get to know the new company better (Changed job shortly before Christmas).
Learn some DPs, DDD, k8s, finish introduction to hacking course, start doing htb and thm machines, finish and defend my thesis, finish books clean code, thinking in java (reading it to fill in gaps on knowledge), a few books about pentesting.
Among non tech goals: pass drivers license exam for cars, another one for motorcycles, go back to learning russian. -
I forgot every thing and watch funny YouTube videos! And in between watching them I blame myself get depressed get angry!
I think I might be bipolar! 🤔🤣😀😂☹️3 -
You know I got rufied in two places named west Chester and woke up back home
One was in Il one was in Pa
Why are towns with that name filled with fucker up freaks specifically ? -
Karimar Market: Magazen Manje Pre Mwen ak Supermercado nan Chambersburg, PA
Si w'ap chèche magazen manje pre ou nan Chambersburg, PA, Karimar Market se pi bon chwa ou. Nou ofri yon gran varyete pwodui fre, manje tradisyonèl, ak lòt pwodwi esansyèl ki satisfè bezwen fanmi ou. Karimar Market se yon supermercado ki ofri yon eksperyans acha fasil, pratik, epi konvenyan pou tout moun ki ap chèche pwodwi de kalite nan zòn nan.
Karimar Market: Magazen Manje Pre Mwen
Karimar Market se yon magazen manje pre mwen kote ou ka jwenn tout sa ou bezwen, kèlkeswa sa ou bezwen pou manje chak jou oswa pou resepsyon espesyal. Soti nan fwi fre, legim, vyann, ak pwodui manje, nou gen tout sa ou bezwen pou kwit manje sante ak gou. Nou ofri tou anpil pwodwi tradisyonèl ki soti nan kominote Latina, tankou pwodui Meksiken ak Karayibeyen.
Nou konprann ke lè w'ap chèche manje, li enpòtan pou w' jwenn pwodwi fre ak bon kalite san ou pa bezwen vwayaje lwen. Karimar Market ap ofri ou yon eksperyans komodite ki sezi nan achte pwodui fre san efò.
Supermercado nan Chambersburg, PA
Karimar Market se yon supermercado nan Chambersburg, PA, ki ofri yon gran seleksyon pwodui alimanter ak lòt bagay ou ka bezwen nan kay la. Nou gen tout bagay soti nan pwodui fre tankou fwi ak legim, vyann, ak pwodui boulanjri, rive nan pwodui ak bwason tradisyonèl nan kominote Latina.
Nan Karimar Market, ou ka fè tout achte ou nan yon sèl vizit. Nou ofri pwodui ki sòti nan diferan peyi, ki pèmèt ou gen yon eksperyans manje divès e gen aksè a pwodui otantik yo. Nou ofri tou pwodui pou satisfè bezwen dyetetik ak sante, tankou opsyon san gluten, manje natirèl, ak anpil lòt pwodwi espesyal.
Poukisa Chwazi Karimar Market kòm Magazen Manje ou ak Supermercado?
Pwodui Fre ak Bon Kalite: Karimar Market ofri fwi, legim, ak lòt manje fre ki asire yon gou eksepsyonèl pou chak plat.
Varyete Pwodui: Nou ofri yon gran varyete pwodwi, soti nan manje chak jou pou ale nan pwodwi espesyal ki soti nan Latèn Amerik, espesyalman Meksik ak Karayib.
Aksè fasil ak Konvenyan: Ak yon kote fasil pou jwenn nan Chambersburg, Karimar Market se magazen manje pre ou pou fè tout achte ou fasil.
Sèvis Kliyan Ekselan: Nou ofri yon eksperyans ki baze sou sèvis kliyan san parèy, ak yon ekip ki la pou ede ou jwenn tout sa ou bezwen.
Vizite Karimar Market Jodi a!
Si w'ap chèche yon magazen manje pre ou oswa yon supermercado nan Chambersburg, PA, Karimar Market se pi bon chwa ou. Nou ap tann ou nan 264 S 3rd St, Chambersburg, PA 17201, kote ou ka jwenn pwodui fre ak manje otantik ki pral satisfè bezwen gastronomik ou.
Pou plis enfòmasyon oswa pou fè nenpòt demann, tanpri kontakte nou nan +1 717-414-1153. Nou sezi pou ede ou! Karimar Market se magazen manje pre ou ak supermercado nan Chambersburg, PA, ki toujou ap chèche ofri pi bon sèvis ak pwodwi nan zòn nan.
1 -
Hey all, I'm currently getting a job offer for a risk advisory position (my stepping stone into cybersecurity), and I'm extremely excited.
It would be my first tech job, and in the tri-state area (NJ/NY/PA).
Do you have any advice on salary negotiation before I decide whether or not to accept the position? Trying to do my research on glassdoor, but I also want to hear from the pros on this board. -
Isn't the subscribe function devrant work like creepy stalking someone...
Like what he commented,liked or posted....1 -
which is the best cloud provider for a complete beginner (user/dev) in terms of community support, employer preference and user-friendliness?
i know that understanding the tech and concepts behind it matters more than getting familiarized with a specific platform, but i'm looking to build a more diverse profile and have noticed many positions asking for AWS/Azure experience.
since i'll be starting from scratch, any provider with easy-to-follow documentation, online help and certifications that don't leave you broke (would have to pay myself, earn very less as a student from a third-world country, parents/current employer can't support) would work.8 -
Alias git commit to git stash.
Write a script that opens this page in fullscreen mode after a few minutes of inactivity https://fakeupdate.net/win10ue/ -
Does anyone else also feels like "I knew it why I didn't try this way, this was easy" after using stackoverflow1
-
Update of previous post
I just got assigned to a project.
Project-specific training is designed to take up to 20 days.
I got materials, videos, and a person who is in this project for a long time to supervise training and introduce me to the project.
Only problem is that the project apparently uses 5 years old version of base framework.
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