I know a few developers who do this 😂

Will the bug in my code please stand up?

I repeat

Will the bug in my code please stand up?

I think we have a problem here.

*music intensifies*

To new beginnings

Life suddenly became less complicated. Thanks devRant 😊

Swag of a Data Scientist 😎

If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail!

This was something which my tech lead used to tell me when I was so obsessed with nosql databases a few years back. I would try to find problems to solve that has a use case for nosql databases or even try to convince me(I didn’t realise it back then) that I need to use nosql db for this new idea that I have, without really thinking deep enough whether the data in question is better represented using an sql schema or not.

Now, leading a team of young developers, I come across similar suggestions from few of my team members who just discovered this new and shiny tech and want to use it in production projects.

While I am not against new and shiny, it’s not a good practice to jump right in to it without exploring it deep enough or considering all the shortcomings. The most important question to ask is, whether some of the problems you are trying to solve can be solved with the current stack.

Modifying your stack requires more than just a week’s experience of playing around with the getting started guide and stack overflow replies. This is something which need to be carefully considered after taking inputs from the people who would be supporting it, that include operations, sysadmins and teams that are gonna interface with your stack indirectly.

I am not talking about delaying adoption by waiting for long list of approvals to get some thing that would bring immediate value, but a carefully orchestrated plan for why and how to migrate to a new stack.

Just because one of the tech giants made a move to a new stack and wrote about it in their engineering blog doesn’t mean that you need to make a switch in the same direction. Take a moment to analyse the possible reasons that motivated them to do it, ask yourself if your organisation is struggling with the exact same problems, observe how others facing the same issue are addressing it, and then make an informed decision.
Collect enough data to support your proposal.
Ask yourself again if you are the one holding the hammer.
If the answer is no, forge ahead!

Going on reddit while the code is compiling... And not realizing when it finishes.

I am serious. In 1 month, I wrote 32451 lines of code.

- 960 functions
- 189 unit tests

I accidentally sent my password to slack channel!!

I have deleted it and changed my password of course, but it still doesn't make the embarrassment go away. Especially because my password is something ridiculous like :

Materialisticbitch88$$$

Some people have already seen it!!
RIP my reputation.
:/

😂
Courtesy - xkcd.com

When I take a break from ranting, this is where you can find me.

When my impostor syndrome is going rampant.

Wtf Microsoft...

Found out the hard way that copying a line of code from Teams chat will sometimes convert the spaces into unrecognized ASCII char.

Spent a few hours yesterday to fix the bad chars.
🤡👍

All good stories start with "when I pushed to production on a Friday..."

Project manager: how was the day?
Me: wrote a few lines of code
Me: ran the code
Me: full of errors
Me: I cried

Yo.

His palms are sweaty
Knees weak arms are heavy
Bugs littering his code already
Cold spaghetti 🍝

He’s nervous but on the surface he looks calm and ready to git push

(Hit a blank with thinking of code-related lyrics, anyone got ideas?)

OMFG!! I just discover a fucking bug in a library used by thousand of people in scientific community!! 🤩🎉

Started when my program outputting strange result. I was in a huge fight with my supervisor about one of the function from the library. My hunch was telling me that this function is the source of the problem, but he insisted that no such bugs could exist in the library that has been used by thousands of people.

I couldn't reproduce the bug so I just stayed silent at that time,
But now, I finally got the bug showing. Yeah I am gonna shove it to his face next week.✊
I will also let the people who maintain the library know.
Feels so good being able to be a contributor PR to this famous library 😎

The downside is now I can't use this function, I have to implement by own function.

When you spend a weekend building your custom rig, but the inner fanboy conscience takes over 😜

If I changed girlfriends as often as I changed JavaScript libraries, I'd still be looking for a girlfriend.

Cuz I try and avoid using JavaScript.

My favorite thing about completing a project is closing a bazillion browser tabs.

@dfox should split devrant into categories.

-rants
-advice/help
-weekly rants (already there)
-dev memes

Then people can just read rants or whatever they want without other things getting in the way.

Down vote can also be used if something is in the wrong category

When websites disable right click

#trump.elected > #population {
transition: 5s;
location: canada;
}

I want to print this pic out in enormous size and qty, hang them in many classrooms to show my female friends that it's normal to wear cute skirt and cute shoes while wringing cables on your shoulders.

😏

I thought meditation was more like putting myself in “airplane mode”. But in reality it felt more like a DDoS attack!

++ if you get it...

Every time I hear my boss say "surely it can't be that hard" or "that's what, like a 5 minute job?"
*shudder*

Most of my code solutions came to me while I'm in the shower
🚽🚽

Css puns.

Team: Qt doesn’t let us build the UX we have in mind. Web is the future.

Me: what do you guys recommend ?

Team: Electron! We vote for Electron!

Me: Alright, who know JavaScript here?

Team: ...

I just hate it when clients with no knowledge of developing says I'm looking for "more professional"

FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!

Somebody did that with dedication and you can't just call it that!!

SCREW YOU!!!
😡😡😡😡😡

My partner in crime

Finally I got a speed up in my GPU!
😎😎🎉🎉

Me thinking that getting a job in tech is easier than getting a non-tech job because we are "in demand".

'This basically sums up everything I know about sports

How I find most "modern" JavaScript frameworks

If only there were some previous example of a mouse with a cord in a more convenient spot Apple could've used as a reference...

At least you don't need a mouse to commit, push and stare at devRant😅.

Prof: "Hey, you can take a look at the source code that we used last year in this research paper"
Me :(surprise because other papers usually don't share source code), "Okay"

A few weeks later:
Me: "Prof, if you use method A instead of method B, you can get better performance by 20%. Here's the link"
Prof:"The source link that you mentioned is for another instrument, not GPU"
Me:"Yeah, but I tested in on GPU and I found it is also applied in my device"
Prof:"That's interesting."
-----------------------------------------------------
This is why folks, sharing the source code that you used in scientific papers is important.

Dont get attached to your code at work! Coz it's not your code, you got paid for writing that code and that's it.

🤨🤨??

That awkward moment when you made some changes in your code and hope that it will fail so that you can confirm your theory/suspicion.

Otherwise you'll have no idea what's going on.

: /

Just received a job invitation for my first developer position. But I never wrote a line of code in my life. I guess my interviewer too.

Me 2 days ago :
"I have applied to so many places, and did lots of interview for my internship. Still no result so far. Maybe I need to take some odd jobs to cover my bills while I improve my coding skills. Rent and food need to be paid, you know.
But I will keep applying to at least 40 companies before I change my strategy"

Me today :
"OMFG, they offered me a position despite my very bad interview!!"
🤩

So whoever is still looking for a job out there, don't give up man... We are in this together.👍👍

"Me getting ready to squash the bug" vs
"Me after fixing the bug caused by my own stupidity"

Just arrived! Time to ingest some common sense 🤓

My work desktop setup!

Follow me on @cha_m_ra

When notifications decide to play hide and seek on iOS 11 beta!

When your team uses both scss & less in the same project

Found out other team's project result about performance for uni assignment. It's that Matlab is the fastest, followed by python and C++ is the slowest.

They are gonna get roasted during presentation (by many people in the audience including me).
This is gonna be fun.
/*devilish grin*/

Finally my fidget cube arrived

Google DevFest Sri Lanka

Every time I copy some code I feel like holding I'm something heavy till I past it somewhere!😋😋

I should really write documentation for my old projects...
Meh. I'll do it tomorrow...

If I do it in python : Finish in one day!
If I do it in C++ :
1 week for installation and configuration
3 days for coding
Another 1 day for troubleshooting...

But I will still prefer do it in C++.

Skills required for ML :
Math skills:
|====================|
Programming skills :
|===|

Skills required for ML with GPU:
Math skills:
|====================|
Programming skills :
|====================|

/*contemplating career choice*/
: /

Home desktop setup

I attended a 2-days scientific conference last week which lasted from 9 AM-7 PM.
I submit my travel expenses today and the university adm got guts to tell me that
I should commute 6 hours everyday to that place instead of staying in a hotel.

Please people, I contribute making our research and name renown to the public. I don't even get paid doing that (did it for the sake of experience).
The least you can do is to support the accomodation. The penny pinching you did in the name of cost saving is embarrasing.

I didn't like every hour spent working in the uni, yet people still ask me why I won't continue to PhD.
No offence to all PhDs out there. It's just that my practical and money-oriented ass couldn't
stand all the free work I have to do if I do that.
I'd rather work in a supermarket, at least I'm getting paid of what I'm worth.
😕

I'm a noob so I was dumb enough to google 'Eyeballs' in case it's a kind of tools that I don't known yet.
😕

Every project ever :
Initial plan :
||===================|| 100 %
Actual submission
||==|| 13%

- Not enough money!
- Not enough people!
- Not enough time!
- Not enough resources!
- Hardware not supported
- Software not supported
- My team are useless
- God didn't like it. :/

I think someone deserves a sticker if their rant gets 100 --'s because hey, at least they tried

Expectation: I'm going to spend today debugging my app

Reality: adds 10 new features, 30 got commits and some Easter eggs. No bugs fixed.

Previously, I rant in twitter but none of my followers understand them.
So now I am gonna switch here.

Please bear with me. (^.^)d

Petition to change the Anonymous logo from this to this
🤡🤡

So yeah...

Working in my underwear

STICKER TIME!

The guy I work with was pissed because I asked him the status of his task during the daily meeting.
He doesn't want me to embarrass him because he hasn't finished this task. He said not to push him further as he will do it soon.

Dude, the point of having a daily meeting is to give updates of all pending tasks. it's been one week, you're procrastinating on this task is delaying the progress of my task.
Mind you, this guy has a PhD but he can't even understand a simple project management like this.

Hehehe this whole team is clown world 🤪🤡

My #developer stater pack!

S̠̪͓͓͐̑̑ͥȉ͎̦̬̱̤̣ͯ̆ͩ̃̌n̦̙̙̦͉̟̟͋ͬ̉ͫ̍̈́̚c͓̰͚͚̆̎ͦͫe ̹ͨ̚ͅt̠̟̦͍͕̑̾ͬͬ͒ͦͅǒ̪̩̑m͍̖̭o̝̬͚̦̥̺r͌̋ṙ̒̐̄ò͙͓ͭw ͩ̔̿̎ͤ̋ͮi̼̭̦ͥͣ͒s̪̰̃̂ ̲̰̮̣̮̌ͭͬ͆̔H͉̳a̠̲̟̹͓̰͎͐͆ͥ̓͋̍̎llo̱̺͖̲͑̒̿ͨw̜͓̟̺̹̹ḙ̭̳̬͇̻ê͖̼̮ͥ́n͉̺͑̽,̫̲ͪ̅ ̫̲͓̟̳̋͊̇̆̈̓ͅľ̠̰̅et̠̩̟̦͉̦͕͐̓ͦ͌ͩͥ̓s̱̓ p͔͚͈͎̰͓̘ra̰̘̥̗̲̯͓n͎̪̠̗͎̬k̈ͬ̊͛̉̅̚ ȏ̻͇̫̰̞ͣ̌̄̌uͤͭ͑ͯr͉̗ͅ ͊̊ñ͙̯͈͑͑o̗̙̍ͤn-͚̘͎̣͑͊͑̇̔ͅtͨ̽̿͑̇̚ḙ̱̾ͭc͍h ̯͖̓ͯf͓̗̥͔̥̬̎͒ͤ́͒ͯr͍͙̋̋ȉ̤en̥̻̦̥d̟̜̟ͬͩ̈́s͍͕̦̭̣͉̿̔̇ͯͥͬ ̲͛w̞̽i̥͕̙̹ͅt͖̠͕̒̍̈́h͉ ͊͐ẗ̒́̄̍͊h̗̜͔ͅi̖̟̫ͪͨ͊͊́ͅͅs ͚̩̟̐ͦͩ̔ͅz̰̫̦̹͖̙ͅḁ̗̬̪̪̰̋̐̂̈́̑͆l͂̓͐̈́g͖ŏ͓̘̳̝̩͍̯͆̈̎̈̍̚ ̫̞͕̺̣̌ͬ͛͋̿t̤̰͍̼̘͖͈́̇̄̂ͭͬͮe̘͖̠̠̓̊ͤ̅x͉͙͎͈ͩ̂̉͂t͙̞̣̖͖̀̎̽ͮ̇.͎̣̤

How many programmers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

It doesn't matter. Its a hardware problem not a software problem...

My non-programmer friend (a mechanical engineer) has better pay doing what she loves.

I have lower pay, clocking more hours, and stress, doing a subject that I don't like.

Should I change profession?
: /

From this day onwards I'm following this technique

This guy told me that I was unprofessional because I called him reckless.
He thought that reckless is unprofessional word?!

Are you fucking kidding me?! 🤬

I was just pointing out his recklessness of wanting to delete files in our shared platform without permission from the owners.
These files may be important and he only gave us 1h to back it up. He's the one being unprofessional.🤪

Anyhow, this is not the first time I have had a fight with him, and certainly won't be the last.

Me working in High Performance Computing :
CPU/GPU in full throttle ... go brrrr...

Me working on an app:
Should put sleep() in the while loop so as not to overwork the CPU

😑😑

Our marketing just change the blacklist/whitelist terms to blocklist/allowlist to make it more "neutral" following change in github "master branch" to "main branch"

When will this end, people ?
:/

Best os on one of the worst entertainment systems on any airline.

Me : "I need to stop geeking out about security because I have exams and need to write a report"

Me 2 hours later : "Ooooo.. what's this cool article about?Let's check it out 😎"

OKAY

WHO THE FUCK DESIGNED THIS STUPID ANDROID EMULATOR.

ALL I WANT TO DO IS LISTEN TO MY MUSIC WHILE PROGRAMMING

BUT NOOOOOOO

WHENEVER THE FUCKING EMULATOR IS OPEN THE QUALITY OF THE MUSIC IN MY BLUETOOTH HEADPHONES GOES TO aBsOluTe SHIT.

CMON GUYS. GET YOUR HEADPHONES OUT OF YOUR ASS AND TEST YOUR FUCKING SOFTWARE

My laptop's fan is blowing so fiercely like someone is trying to mine a crypto on it.

: /

When I look at old screenshots of apps, I think, "this was state-of-the-art once"

Unpopular opinion:

- It's not a guarantee that someone who gets into tech because he/she likes gaming will be a good dev

- It's not a guarantee that someone who gets into tech because he/she likes money will be a bad dev.

Work of a my co-workers good work! It's called colspan you dumb fuck! Best part is that no way I'm changing this coz I work in place where they don't give a fuck about code quality! So fuck it!

If you didn't became a developer what would you be? What's your plan B?

Mine is to be a psychologist.

My mom (a single mother who had to feed 4 kids) feed me, let me stay in her house (at least until I was 21) and let me use the motorcycle.
Instead of running away and giving up her children to child institution (because that's probably what I will do being a selfish person that I am)
If that's not support, I don't know what that is anymore.
It might not be much but at least it gave me the time to grew up and be independent to pursue my dream of working in IT.

Her strength and toughness facing the hard life is also the main inspiration for me to keep going, to prove that I can do whatever I want if I put enough effort on it.

I have only been working with this open-source tool for 2 weeks, but already found 2 bugs. The maintainer is also nice enough answering questions quickly in the forum and submitting the issues for me.

It's nice to be able to contribute something to the open-source community. Yay for me! 💯

Too bad that next week, I will transfer to another project and stop working with this tool.

My code be like:

Call the method cronk...

WROOOONG MEEETTTTTTTHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDD!!!

*climbs out of alligator pit*

Why do we even have that method

Every engineer in my company seems to be passionate about the industry we're in.
For example:
If we're in a medical industry, they're excited about being able to help sick people with the medical devices that we program. They're excited about the news/progress in the medical communities. They have something more motivating beyond creating tech tools.
For me, it's just a job with a paycheck. I don't drink their kool aid. I'm occasionally excited if I managed to create new things with new software tools.
I am often jealous with them, because they seem to be already working in their dream job, instead of having cold dead eyes like mine.

Even though I have 500 reputation on StackOverflow I'm afraid to ask a question! Coz other devs can be really down right mean! No one knows everything, we are all here to learn. Some ppl don't understand that they too started like this.

What if you were asked to develop something that goes against your morals or beliefs. Would you do it?

PS - they are willing to pay you more that you ask for

Why is it soooo taboo to ask co-workers salary?

When being a developer means you give up sleep :p

Those of you who like "The Imitation Game", you probably want to check out "Hidden Figures" (2016). It's on Netflix now.

About a team of female African-American mathematicians who wanted to "break the glass ceiling" in NASA.
- Dorothy : conquered the (recently acquired) IBM frameworks using Fortran and taught her team to program it
- Mary : appealed to court to be allowed to study in a all-white school to get her qualification to be an aerospace engineer
- Katherine : her skills in analytical geometry enabled her to be the first female African-American in the Space Task Group in calculating the momentous capsule launch into orbit

My lazy ass just can't fathom how someone who deals with so much math and pressure can still smile to their family after work. My grumpiness nature will surely turn me into a monster.

And now I know what "human computers" means.

Here's how I describe my workplace:
- a mid dev that will stay mid forever
- a senior but with junior skill
- a mid but actually a junior
- a verbose dev, people having rough time trying to understand her because her explanation is always blown up
- a PM without enough technical skill
- a dev with personality like a moody teenager
- a contractor but acting like a customer

Did I miss anything? 🤔

FUCKING HELL!

I just shutdown my computer after deciding to leave the unfinished feature that I started a couple hours ago for tomorrow.

Not 5 fucking minuets later I had found a solution in my head but now don’t want to spend the time to turn my computer on to fix it. Ugh

Devrant needs to add a censorship that changes "fuck" to "fsck" because technology

True comment!
😂😂🤣🤣🤣

Next generation programming language

Last year, my current manager promised me a significant salary increase if I transferred to his team. He said that's because his department has bigger budget. So I did.

Today I received a notification for a 5% salary increase. 😂

I am a dummy for trusting him. 🤡
There's a reason why a lot of my former colleagues are no longer in the company.

Never fully trust your company folks!

"Some days I amaze myself.
Other days I look for my phone while I'm talking on it".

😑

Other people : save money to buy car, house, etc...

Me : save money to pay for this f*cking degree where 80% of what they taught will be useless after graduation.

: /

The look I give to my friends when they asked dumb questions in class.

Annual inflation rate = 9.2%.
My annual salary increase = 5.5% (from my meager salary as junior)

Thanks management 🤡👍

Guess who has 2 thumbs, half a brain and lost his job today...

Because of high gas price, the government decided to lower our tax.
For me it translates to additional EUR 11/month ☹.
This is after deductions of thousands of euros each months (tax and social contribution) from my hard-earned salary. How come nobody is complaining about this?

During my yearly review, I told my manager that I expect to see significant salary increase next year (the inflation is 9% duh!).
She told me that I can expect to get 20% increase after 3-4 years. ☹
Now I know why a lot of people are leaving. How can you expect your employer to stay put if you're constantly paying them under market rate?! I have to keep switching jobs every 4-5 years to get a decent pay, right? Yet society expect me to settle down and have a stable job.

And then, how come a PM earn significantly more than a regular dev? Even the job interview is much easier. But I like the technical part too much to switch to people management.

By no means, I am starving right now working as a dev. I am happy that I even have a job, but somehow I felt like what I do is pointless just being a wage slave, and felt demotivated in a lot of ways.

P.S.: I am writing this now in front of my work computer. I have to catch up some work to do otherwise I won't have time to do it during the weekdays 😔
Pray for me guys I can get better job within next year.

When you got hired

HR: please come to us if there's any problems related work so that we can give a solution.

After years of working you send a mail with you problems, it's been months. Still no reply! And try to avoid conversation regarding that problem.

That feeling when you spend hours trying to fix something, only to give up.

Then you come back he next day and find you were missing a comma...

I am in the mood for anything at 11 PM-5 AM.
Cleaning the house, studying, coding ...
Juices of ideas, energy and focus are just overflowing.
Too bad that I have to follow "normal people" schedule which starts at 9 AM.

:/

Power cut at the office now I have to talk to my coworkers!!! 🙄😶😑

Nested nested if statements!!!
😡😡😡😡😡😡

How can I make my manager understand that performance should not be measured by how many tickets we have resolved?

If the ticket is an easy one then sure 1-2 days is enough, but for some complicated shit or dealing with models that I have never touched before, I am gonna need several days just to understand the requirement.

For some fucked up reason, our story point is in hours, instead of days. So when we say 24 hours, then it's only 3 days.

Another fucked up reason is that my colleagues doesn't seem to mind. I am the most vocal one objecting when got assigned too many tickets. They just joke around and seem to accept it.

FYI, I am just 6 months in and bouncing between 3 projects.
Am I just too lazy or slow?
In my previous company, the devs seemed to be pretty chill, and the project manager only complained when an issue has been dragging on for weeks.

The whole dev community.

Those who have dedicated time and energy to share solutions, tricks, bug-solving ideas, codes that I can steal; teach me patiently even though I am slow, cheer me up when I am down because I'm stuck debugging for hours, brighten me up with programming jokes when I am sad.
Those who have allowed me to earn good money in the field that I really enjoy.

Yeah, including you 😘

Have you had any money saved? What is your process when it comes to saving money? What kind of investments did you do with your savings?

My sister: "I didn't know that you were so fluent in geek"

I aim to please!

How do you deal with team members who's not open to criticisms as a TL

If I have the same privileges (time, money, connections, environments, energy etc) that they have, I will surely achieve 3x more.

I am not trying to find an excuse, that's the reality. I already achieved way more than most people with the same background. I should be proud of myself, and other people who think otherwise can go fuck themselves.

༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ

Good artists copy but great artist steal
🤔😱🤷

I read an article that says stress balls are far less effective for stress relief than punching your PM on the face.

They should have included a warning...

Got hooooot pink coloured pair of beats for my birthday!!! Best gift ever! Two most things I like is music and code this is the perfect gift! Pink is the only problem but fuck it. I love theseeeee!!!

Friends were having great and fun time last night partying after (also) last week partying.
And now someone's having friends over for dinner in the shared kitchen.
While here I am hours staring at my screen trying to break the algorithm.
: /
______________________________
Me : Enough with coding! I need social life!
5 min later :
*Checking devrant and reddit/programminghumor

UNLIMITED POWER

Apples programming jokes tho

Choooo chooooo (see my previous rant if you don't get it

Yesterday was a day off so I developed a vue, vuex , laravel application. Today back to work and start writing some shity code!

I've only been here for 1 month for my new position in Ops, and I already miss software development!

All I do everyday is just typing commands on the terminal.
If I am feeling fancy, I may create a script or two (that's the closest thing I have to writing code).

I hope I can get more interesting thing to do in the future. If not I can't see myself doing this in long term. It's OK for occasional tasks or added responsibility but I don't want to do it as my main job.

Intend to help a friend to find out what's wrong with a software installation in his laptop today...
But forgot that his Windows installed in Chinese version... how am I supposed to help.... (; _ ;)
I can't read Chinese... can't even find how to open Control Panel...
_________________________________
My native language is not English, but I always have all my techies set up in English.

my fist job... i get to edit a c++ code written by a (mind you) programming company that they teamed with for the past(mind you again) 3 years ...
now just for starters, this code was edited by self taught coders that are really good engineers(they are really good), that didnt really know how the code worked before yet they still changed it, and it worked, how ever they wanted some changes.
i get the project files, and there is not one single comment describing what is happening... only code commented out... and no documentation what so ever were done....
so below are some of my comments that i wrote after i finished adding what i had to add, and fixing what i had to fix:

/*first rule of C anything coding, no actual functions in the header, well let me introduce you to a fully functioning thread running program all in the header, enjoy*/

//used to control the thread
// i honestly dont know why, but it worked soooooo yea...

// TG uncommented // for absolutely no reason what so ever...

//used to communicate with the port

//the message to be sent to the inverter, which has a code that will handle it
//hmmmmmm...

//again not usefull since we are using radioButtons
// same ...
// same ...
// same ...
// they said they dont even use this mode, but none the less, same ...
// calculate the checksum for the message
// ....
// one of the things that work, and god forbids i touch
// used for the status displayed on screen
// used for the (censored :P) status in the message
// used for the (censored :P) status in the message
// not used at all, but the message structure contains it and i refuse to edit that abomination
// used for the (censored :P) status in the message
// used for the (censored :P) status in the message
// just dont ask and roll with it, i didnt want to touch this
// saaaaame ...
// if before true this saaaaaame ...
// value of the (censored :P)
// it pains me to say it again, but this is no use
// (censored :P) input
// (censored :P) input
// only place seen , like for real it was just defined,sooooo yea :D
// well you know how it is
// message string
// check sum string
/****below from feed back****/
// (censored :P) coming in
// (censored :P) coming in
// (censored :P) coming in
// (censored :P)
/****below is the output to the receiver ****/
//(censored :P)
// (censored :P)
// (censored :P)
// (censored :P)
//you thought we were done.... nope, no idea. it comes in the feedback
// not used, literally commented out the one time it was used
// same ...
// XD, man this is a blast, same ...
// nope ...
// used to store the port chosen for the communication
// is a static for the number of data we have recorded so far, and as a row indicator for the recording method
// used to indicate the page we are on in the excel file, as well as the point in physical point in the test
// same ... oh look at this a positive same :D
// same ...
// same ...

බෑ බෑ මට වැඩ කරන්න බෑ

Full stack isn’t about knowing just a backend and little bit of JavaScript. Turns out a bunch of them who applied this week seem it have derived a new meaning for it!

Throwing around terms like “I am exploring MEAN” doesn’t make you sound cool unless you have some working examples that you have built with it.

I have consumed far more chips and guacamole than a normal person eats in a year...

#Devfuel

MySiteRunsWithNoJsSoHa.js

I always wonder why the IT guys seem to be short tempered when dealing with dev related issues.
Now I understand...

For a few days I have to help my colleague setting up his new project and dear Lord...
I thought I have enough patience because I am a woman...

This guy is very very junior, I couldn't get any input/ideas from him when debugging
Dear god, help us because I am the only one with enough experience in this project.

Me everytime before our daily meeting:

"Breath in Breath out ...
I am not gonna pick a fight with anyone today ..."

The reason why I like to code alone in the dark is so that people cannot see my dumb mistakes such as 'forgetting to hit run after compile and wasting 10 min wondering why my code didn't show on the console'.

: /

Did you ever take advantage of clients that has less computer literacy? Like have you ever escape a bug in the system by telling the client heavy technical BS! 😋

PS - fixings that bug later obviously!!

Can someone tell me how a mid level developer with a PhD from EU country is unable to work independently, conduct investigation by himself without too much hand-holding?
Is he too allergic to use google search?

Or is it me that have too much expectation? He's been in our team for 3 months, he should be able to search docs/procedure/files by himself now. Is it me that are too workaholic nerdy and he's just a normal person?
🤔
Thankfully he's the nicest person in our team, but I am getting fed up having to answer his questions many times.

Bed to desk, desk to bed

Q: "What's your most hated programming language?"

Me: "Lisp"

**Maniacal laughter from the interviewer**

You are not real devloper untill you suddenly realized "that's how I should code that"

I just bought my laptop last year.
But I already crash it several times due to my horrendous C++ programs.
Lifespan is greatly reduced.

/*Please bear with me, sweety!
At least, until graduation!*/
: /

Hardest thing for me as Team leader is to teach people in my team, that task is done, when unit tests are written, pull request is created, approved and merged.

Not when their code compiles for a first time.

WHAT COCKSUCKING LUNATICS DECIDED TO MAKE A PDF ONLY ABLE TO DOWNLOAD WITH JAVASCRIPT.

I CANT DOWNLOAD YOUR FUCKING PDFS TO SIGN BY TONIGHT BECAUSE ALL I HAVE IS MY IPad. WHICH DOESNT FUCKING HAVE JAVASCRIPT

THERE IS A TIME AND A PLACE TO USE JAVASCRIPT AND THIS IS NOT ONE OF THEM. GO CASTRATE YOURSELF WITH A RUSTY KNIFE

Interviewer said that passing technical interview means that 90% of the time I will get the offer.
In the final interview with management, I can't answer some questions because I didn't study. Isn't final interview should just about getting to know each other like hobby, interest, talking about company products?
They gave me some puzzle to solve :(

After that, they wait another 1 week just to tell me I don't pass. Why the fuck they wait 1 week just to tell me that? They should just tell me 1 day after!

I still have other job openings right now, but the job searching has been very depressing.
I will give it like 1 more month. But if I can't get any leads, I will just give it up. Maybe tech is not the right job for me.
I will just go back to my old job in non-tech. It's not exactly my dream job, but at least they don't treat me like shit like this.

Never gets old...

Dem css puns tho.

Friends/Seniors : "Hey, you should take these courses. They are easy and you can get easily an A!"

Who the fuck decide what optional courses to take based on if it's easy or not?!
Students take them because :
a. They are interested in the subjects
b. Knowledge/skills after attending the courses will be beneficial for future career.

I put my money more on option b though, i.e I'd rather get C's in courses that I found it useful, than getting A's in useless courses.
(Btw, my avg grade is just a little above Cs)
If my sole purpose was just to get straight A's, I would enroll in liberal art courses instead of this stressing half-CS course we're in.
You're a joke to yourself, that's why I don't hang out with you.

...It relies on the BouncyCastle cryptography library instead of OpenSSL, yet replicates OpenSSL bugs to guarantee compatibility.

Spends 6 hours trying to fix all the bugs...

Missing a comma on line 3...

The number of services you need to grok for full AWS certification...

"Technology, only as good as the dumb shits who are using it" - London has fallen

Dockerize all the things! 🐳🐋

Spent 3 weeks working on an issue (raised by dev A) by following the suggested solution stated in the issue.
Pushed a PR and got told by dev B that it's not the correct solution.
Dude, I am just an intern here and following whatever they told me to do. If you have a problem with the solution, please discuss it with dev A.
Now I may have to let go of the issue completely because it turns out to be much more complicated, not for someone with intern level skill.
FML, I guess this won't be the last time I had this right?

How do you manage your relationship with you partner and work like?

What I want to write :
//TODO : Parallelized this sh*t ???

What I actually write :
//TODO : Parallelized this part later if possible (i.e after checking if overhead doesn't cost too much)

Sigh.. I want to add more of my personality in my code.
: /

Why do I find really hard to connect with my coworkers?! I'm an introvert but after few months in my old job I connected with everyone. In my new job I find it really hard! And it's almost a year! 😥😫

Now... I understand 2FA is to make things more secure, and I do appreciate it. BUT can we please work out a damn solution for people who work in an agency for other corporates which only have one shared account across the agency that bundles one phone number or mobile app.

What if people are on leave or sick? I need stupid 2FA to be able to login/work. uhhhhhhh.....

You don't! Working for a bad company would ultimately give you the experience you need that a good company wouldn't

There's nothing annoys me more that seeing un-indented code. I think I have code OCD

I was having a discussion with my Spv because I am stuck at my project, when suddenly he said :
"Hey, you seem to enjoy this subject!"

And I was just standing there speechless..
🤨
Excuse you...
I spent so much time than required in the contract because I'm getting paid and more importantly because I can put this experience in my portfolio.
Not because I enjoy this job.
I'd rather work on my personal project, preparing for job interview or playing with my cats if I have another choice.

He is a nice guy and has helped me a lot, but in the end it's all about the money.
Or maybe because I have a hard time trusting people these days.
I can't wait to start job hunting next month so that I can say goodbye to this job.

Finally successfully installed Ubuntu!!!!

In several occasions I run rm -rf * in the wrong folder (or wrong server!!).
No big deal so far, but I had to spent more time to redo my work since Linux has no fucking recycle bin like Win!
So I created this helper function to give my brain a few seconds to think before my finger hit Enter.

delete_all_files()
{
echo "WARNING:Delete all files? Type fluffycat to proceed"
read x
if [ "$x" = "fluffycat" ]
then
echo "Deleting all files..."
rm -rf *
fi
}
alias myrm=delete_all_files

Hehehe... I am a genius 😎

In my PR :

Senior dev A : "You should change the format according to <link to coding standard>"
Me : "But it doesn't mention anywhere about that format. <senior dev who wrote the standard> also agrees with me. Other reviewers also already approved."
Senior dev A : **proceed to give me an example from a file that's not even in the PR scope**
Me : "I cannot find that file in my PR"
Senior dev A : **give me another example example from my PR**
Me : "Okay I missed that, I am gonna fix it, but other files are already using consistent format. I have already merged changes for 500 files using this format, and I still have 400 files to go.
Do you really want me to revert the changes from 500 files?" :/
Senior dev A : "I don't want to be your enemy, I just want to make our codebase better"
Me : **Mad because he took this personally.**
**I don't want to be your enemy either. I also care about the codebase. I just want to finish this ticket ASAP instead of implementing your cosmetic changes that's not even in the standard so that I can work on another ticket that will have more impact to the company**
Senior dev A : "Ok, I will approve it, just add some whitespaces"
Me : 🤦‍♀️

I sometimes think that some senior dev just want to flex when they're reviewing PR.
They just want to let people know they wield the power.

If you're reviewing someone's code, do you run/test the code before reviewing the logic? Or do you review logic before running the code?

The later I Stay up, the more wrappers appear next to my computer in the morning...

Funny how that works....

What if programming languages are only available commercially?

Hmmm! So I'm passive aggressive person. I don't argue with my fellow devs I post the their faults on devRant!

I am so bored with my job in Devops, I only need a few dirty scripts to run everything...
So much so that I started to search for C++ jobs (going back to my previous background), even though I hate C++.
At least it's going to be more mentally stimulating, they also tend to be paid higher than Devops.

I found a budget salary for dev with 4-5 YOE in 2011 in my company, digging through internal old docs.
Assuming 2% increase per year, the 2023 budget salary is now EUR 15k more than what average dev get in my company.

I remember that someone mentioned similar thing in other socmed where he found through internal docs, salary for his position 10 years ago and now are the same, totally neglecting inflation.
On the other hand house/property values has doubled within 10 years.

How can we pressure companies to give us appropriate salary?
When I ask for increase, they will just say no because it's the market rate, but the market rate sucks.

My first time doing a pair-programming for uni assignment.
My partner is actually smart (a Mechanical Engineering guy), except when it comes to programming :
1. Don't know how to spell FALSE
2. Don't know how to create array in Matlab
3. Poor variable naming
4. Redundant code everywhere
5. Not using tabs
6. Stealing my idea and spit it again in my face after claiming it as his idea
7. Mansplaining every line of his code like I am a stupid person who never sees a computer before.

He said he has an experience in Matlab, wants to specialize in Robotics and taking several ML classes. What did they teach anyway in class to produce a shitty programmer like him?

Thankfully despite his being an arrogant shitty guy, he still manage to get our code to works.
That's good because if not, then I will happily push his head under water while slowly watching him drown.

🤨

Bambi's mom

I am not a PHP dev but this back end error message when accessing /notif looks weird.

Is this a security bug?

So my current PC is named the tesseract for its power and squareish case shape.

I just had a thought that if I ever seriously upgrade it or build a new PC, I should name it Thanos...

Only after seeing horror stories on devrant do you think twice before rm -rf'ing something

I asked for a front end developer not fucking project manager!

This phising email I just received in my yahoo account almost got me fooled with the very convincing email design, but thankfully the culprit didn't smart enough to spoof his email address.
Ohh and they attach a suspicious pdf file too despite the message didn't say anything about attachment.
Apparently the spam detector in yahoo is not very good as this one was received in my main inbox.

I now feel all warm and fuzzy inside...

Removing errors from code is like playing whack-a-mole.

You hit one and two pop up again.

!dev

Still haven't got a schedule for my master thesis defense after 2 months. The normal deadline is 1 month.
My professor is ignoring my follow up emails, even after the head of the program urging him to finish the review.
I feel discriminated as this didn't happen to other students that worked under him before.
I am job searching now, what if a job offer came but I still couldn't get a graduation certificate because of my delayed defense.
Will the university willing to compensate for the time loss not being able to work?
Maybe I should start finding out how to hire a lawyer in case I have to sue the uni.
😡

Mine was at my school when I was 13 or 15. I didn't have a computer at home because my parents could not offered a one. Back then I didn't know any thing about computers but always knew that I wanted to do something related to computers.

So, when I went to the computer lab in my school I was so dumb, I couldn't even click on a button using the mouse. We were partnered up two students per computer and me try so hard use a computer and my partner take over and show off his talent how he can use a computer.

I was sad and devastated even though I love computer I couldn't use a computer but my willingness to learn about computers science never faded a away!

Few years fast forward; I'm a web developer and I'm happy with what I do. The fellow student who showed off still contact me for his trouble shootings regarding computers.

Never give up on you dreams

Working as a team!! I hate working with others! 😫

Pissed af at my idiot teammates for dragging down my project grades. But I believe this won't be the last time as there are more idiots out there.

I need the credits to graduate .. sigh...
: /