Dad: why do these forms ask me to fill those random characters(captcha)

Me: to verify that you are human

Dad: as if animals can use computers

Me: 😅

...okayyy 🤔

How I feel when editing an Android Manifest file

I'm the only programmer for my employer. Today I finished a GUI and engine to let our managers easily post annoucments to our TVs.
Nothing crazy; PHP login screen, some forms, small database, and the app to run on the TVs.
When I told my manager it was up and running she asks "Since you can build that, can you start working on a tool to run voice analytics off of our agents phone calls?".
Sure.. I'll get right on that.. Follow up with me in 4 years.

If you're going to bother to detect that my input is without hyphens, then you can certainly insert them for me too.

I’m a senior dev at a small company that does some consulting. This past October, some really heavy personal situation came up and my job suffered for it. I raised the flag and was very open with my boss about it and both him and my team of 3 understood and were pretty cool with me taking on a smaller load of work while I moved on with some stuff in my life. For a week.

    Right after that, I got sent to a client. “One month only, we just want some presence there since it’s such a big client” alright, I guess I can do that. “You’ll be in charge of a team of a few people and help them technically.” Sounds good, I like leading!

    So I get here. Let’s talk technical first: from being in a small but interesting project using Xamarin, I’m now looking at Visual Basic code, using Visual Studio 2010. Windows fucking Forms.

    The project was made by a single dev for this huge company. She did what she could but as the requirements grew this thing became a behemoth of spaghetti code and User Controls. The other two guys working on the project have been here for a few months and they have very basic experience at the job anyways. The woman that worked on the project for 5 years is now leaving because she can’t take it anymore.

    And that’s not the worse of it. It took from October to December for me to get a machine. I literally spent two months reading on my cellphone and just going over my shitty personal situation for 8 hours a day. I complained to everyone I could and nothing really worked.

    Then I got a PC! But wait… no domain user. Queue an extra month in which I could see the Windows 7 (yep) log in screen and nothing else. Then, finally! A domain user! I can log in! Just wait 2 extra weeks for us to give your user access to the subversion rep and you’re good to go!

    While all of this went on, I didn’t get an access card until a week ago. Every day I had to walk to the reception desk, show my ID and request they call my boss so he could grant me access. 5 months of this, both at the start of the day and after lunch. There was one day in particular, between two holidays, in which no one that could grant me access was at the office. I literally stood there until 11am in which I called my company and told them I was going home.

    Now I’ve been actually working for a while, mostly fixing stuff that works like crap and trying to implement functions that should have been finished but aren’t even started. Did I mention this App is in production and being used by the people here? Because it is. Imagine if you will the amount of problems that an application that’s connecting to the production DB can create when it doesn’t even validate if the field should receive numeric values only. Did I mention the DB itself is also a complete mess? Because it is. There’s an “INDEXES” tables in which, I shit you not, the IDs of every other table is stored. There are no Identity fields anywhere, and instead every insert has to go to this INDEXES table, check the last ID of the table we’re working on, then create a new registry in order to give you your new ID. It’s insane.

   

    And, to boot, the new order from above is: We want to split this app in two. You guys will stick with the maintenance of half of it, some other dudes with the other. Still both targeting the same DB and using the same starting point, but each only working on the module that we want them to work in. PostmodernJerk, it’s your job now to prepare the app so that this can work. How? We dunno. Why? Fuck if we care. Kill you? You don’t deserve the swift release of death.

    Also I’m starting to get a bit tired of comments that go  ‘THIS DOESN’T WORK and ‘I DON’T KNOW WHY WE DO THIS BUT IT HELPS and my personal favorite  ‘??????????????????????

*Finds devRant*
*Downloads devRant*
*Proceeds to uninstall all other forms of social media*

I'm feeling dumb, now!

"Please add this to all forms."
Added to all forms.
"Oh we don't need it on this one."
Removes it from that specific form.

1 month later
"We noticed this form is missing that. Please add it."

-__-

How web developers debug their markup...

.someBox {
background-color: pink;
}

Fucking HR cunts. I found a nice computer vision vacancy and decided to apply, look what these motherfuckers require :

- Java
- Typescript
- C++
- Javascript
- Amazon Web Services
- OpenCV
- Kubernates
- Spring Boot
- Azure
- Jenkins
- Postgres
- MongoDB
- ELK
- Web Sockets
- Hadoop
- Grafana - Prometheus
- Java EE
- Graph QL
- Kafka
- R
- Angular
- Puppet
- NiFi
- Docker
- Qpid
- Golang
- FPGA-VHDL
- Python

FUCK OFF FUCK OFF FUCKING FuCK OFF you monkeys. Shove your vacancy up your ass.

Another vacancy, another instance, I'm going to apply at employers site, (they sell some sort of CRM crapshit) forms not working, bc not fucking connected to anything. Just a fucking HTML and JS popup notification for submission laying around with its legs wide spread. Like its copied from w3schools or something.
Looked more on the site it is fucked from all sides like it's made by a school kid.

So I fired an email to the HR, something like "I went to apply but your forms are not working, I found the issue, it's that. Also I found some glory holes in your site, hope your I.T. finds them too. Anyways here is my CV, have a nice day"

Day later I'm shortlisted.

Cringing when movies get programming things wrong 😷

Client: Extend string size for that URL field. I have to input a really large URL in there.

Me: Please show me the URL first.

Client: Here it is //randomurl.com/random-route/15363783?i=jfjfjfjjfjfjhf&shit=jfjfjkfkfkgjfjjhh74747jdjh&you=kfjfjbhgg779hdhhd&not=jfjhdh63737#fuckingKiddingMe

Me: You can leave the whole part after the question mark. Insert it like //randomurl.com/random-route/15363783

Client: Ok, great. Thanks.

#####

Me later checking the data inserted:

//randomurl.com/random-route

I hate humans.

Sending a well typed professional email to your boss, but receiving a:

Sure thing

Dave

Sent from my iPhone

Being a software developer automatically qualifies you to fix paper jams and wi-fi issues in the eyes of your family.

Got a new job as UX Developer! Drinks are on me guys 🍻

Well this is a new one.

Had to download some forms online from a governmental institute. Tried logging in and I shit you not I got a message saying "we are currently closed, are opening times are X to Y"

BruhFuckingWhat.exe since when did servers get human rights and working hours

I like it when a boss is a Dev (or a former Dev). Makes them a bit more sympathetic towards us i think :)

Went to the interview.
Filled a hell lot of forms.
Even brought some projects of mine in a usb stick.
Only to discover they need a minimum of bachelor's degree.
People, please when you need something, SAY IT IN THE DAMN AD.

A client asked me to add a mobile phone field to a registration form and asked me explicitly to use their server side validation for it.
Apparently they need a valid provider prefix, but after that everything goes. This was passed as valid mobile phone number.

"So you need access to the test server?"
Me:"Yes"
"Please fill these 800000000 forms,sign here,get your blood sample,your ID ,your right kidney,letter of approval from your boss,...."

Fuuuuuuuck!!!! I just want to change only 3 lines of code!!!!!!

Please, for fucks sake people, STOP CALLING ALL FORMS OF INTERNET ACCESS WI-FI. CELLULAR ACCESS IS NOT WI-FI. FUCKING ETHERNET + FIBER OPTIC/SOME MORE COPPER CABLING/WHATEVER IS **NOT** WI-FI.

Just wanted to say cheers to all those coders among you who make sure their login is encrypted, their passwords are hashed and salted, their codes are tested and their forms are code injection safe.

No client will understand what you did, so take my props for it! After all, its our responsibility to make sure software is secure. That's all :)

Stack Overflow documentation is gonna be awesome in a few years...

Xamarin forms can be such a bitch sometimes
(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻ .
I mean it's challenging
┬─┬ノ( º _ ºノ).

/* secret devRant script */

let joke = "why do Java developers wear glasses? Because they can't C#"

//check if rant was posted recently
if ( !recentRants.find(joke) ) {
postRant(joke)
}

So some dipshit keeps entering his email wrong on forms and putting mine on instead (never met this guy).

So far I've received holiday bookings, plane tickets and payslips. I've already called his mobile and told him what I've received emails for and what he should change.

Still nothing, maybe I should just rob him blind for being so thick...

I recently filled out an e-form that asked you to fill out your birthday in the format of:
DD/MM/YY
but it didn't accept 22/09/1997
I was confused at first. I'm over 18 what's the issue?
Turns out it would only accept 22/9/1997
What sort of monster does that?

When your raspberry pi is bombarded with /phpmyadmin URL attempts in all its forms and possible paths and versions 😅

Like seriously? Who in there right mind uses phpmyadmin AND has it accessible to the public.

- there's no databases on this Rpi but you keep looking.

I just got hired as a systems administrator at a company that develops web forms. NO ONE in the company has heard of git. They don't use any kind of version control.
I'm a little worried...

The effort I put into git commit messages directly reflects my mood and level of tiredness.

I hate styling HTML-forms.

Dear Nokia, I really like your phones. But if I have a question about it, I expect the "Send" button on your contact form to actually work. Thanks.
FYI, I actually checked the console and network tab in two different browsers. No requests, no errors -.-

Being a developer has it's advantages: I wanted to apply for a internet subscription for my home but my home adress wasn't recognized by the provider. So i wanted to send a complain form but this was only possible by providing it with a client number, which I obviously didn't have.
So this was my solution 🎉

hate forms

Here is my list of horrible techs which are common in my current and previous workplace which should be extinct ASAP:

SAP
SharePoint
Java applets
Java Swing desktop apps
C# Windows Forms desktop apps
ASP/JSP
VB
RemoteApp
Shitty insecure php web apps
Micorsoft Access DB
Windows XP
Windows Servers
Closed Linux-based appliances which lack many basic GNU software and are forbidden to tamper with
Every single Symantec product

Post yours below

I fucking hate HTML forms! Especially representing bloody nested objects within them!

Fighting with html forms has taken at least 80% of my time over the past three features. Why can't I just do this via API? It would be soo much freaking simpler! ugh.

But today.
Today is not going to be a good day.
I not only get to expand a complicated vanilla form with with one nested object today, I get to expand it to include three nested objects. Normally this wouldn't be a problem because it's just moving elements around, but two of those nested objects need to be broken up and combined into three+ segments each. I have no idea how to even approach this.

ugh.

I love the skill requirements section of a junior Dev job advertisement.

To summarise "Basically you'll need all the skills and experience of a senior, but we are gonna pay you much much less". 😔

While writing a Xamarin Forms app in C#.

Graphic designer: "Can you increase the letter spacing of this label by 1.5em?"

Me: "Uhhhh...."

Graphic designer: "I know you can do it, I've done it in CSS before"

Me: "...."

Client asks for a *simple* form in his page. I do the job. He likes it. But turns out what he really wants is a tool to create forms, with editable questions-answers and A/B testing capabilities. FUCK!

*finished 4000 lines of code for an application update, vb.net app*
Manager: can we turn this into a Web app instead of a windows forms app?

CSS.
Finally conquering all forms of positioning and boxing after weeks of pure CSS practice. 😥

why the fuck do i have to fill out all these job search websites' forms to generate a CV for me ? i already have a fucking CV !!!

My friend told me stories about his colleague who's always against him.

One time, during their management meeting, that colleague suggested that they should have a suggestion box in the office.

So my friend proposed that they use Google forms. He presented how Google forms work and the majority got really impressed(except the colleague).

Naturally the colleague is against him, he said "this is not what I had in mind". He wanted to have an actual box and people write suggestions on paper and drop it in(suggesting the ancient way).

Every meeting, the colleague complains a lot, and my friend provides techy and convenient solutions.

Kinda dumb that HTML forms don't support all of the HTTP methods (Only GET and POST!)

Today we have a client visiting work. Dressing like a proper business person is mandatory 🙄

When someone comes to your desk and asks "did you get my slack message".... Which they sent 23 seconds ago 😒

Giving functions exciting names so you can feel like a Bond villain while programming:

execute(); destroy(); fire(); isDead();

God this code is hideous

* git blame *

Ahhhh

*slowly back away from the computer*

When developers can't use Regex:

'Your credit card number cannot contain spaces'

ಠ_ಠ

Just recalled the time we sent the new apprentice developer to HR for a "verbal agreement form" to request his birthday off. HR Came back down with him unsure as to where to find the verbal agreement forms.

"Well, that's not very funny." - HR

*Writes a recursive function that works first time*

*Feels like programming God*

Is there any excuse for NOT having a HTTPS connection nowadays?

My university has so many unprotected subdomains that we're supposed to use and LOGIN ON that are not protected. Although these login forms are https protected the rest is not and seems sketchy.

I wonder how much of my life I have spent waiting for 'npm install'

So...Worked my butt off to have a website developed by a certain date client and I agreed on. Finished the site 3 weeks ago and sent dev link. Client has been completely silent; unreachable by email (I sent 5 in past 3 weeks) and phone (left 2 voicemails and a message with his receptionist today). In ALL five emails I told him I needed the email addresses he wants used to route his sales leads to...Got nada.

So today I seen that the lead forms have been tested on the website. Dude can't get back to me for 3 effing weeks, BUT can test his lead forms.. You know, without the lead email addresses that i asked for 5x. Ugh, idiot!!!

One of my current freelance jobs is to "save" a project for an agency.

I was called because they kinda wasted money with two developers who did nothing (or did worse than nothing) and the client became really pissed off.

There was, though, a quite big problem (for me) with this project: it uses Kentico CMS (C#/ASP.Net Web Forms) and I have no previous experience with both CMS and languages it uses.

In the end, I accepted because of money 😏 (and to not put a stain in my name with some people i know 😅).

Bear in mind that I'm a self-taught coder, still on the noob side, and I doubted if I would be capable of doing it (and I still doubt if I did some quality job in it, or need to improve stuff).

I don't know if it was my previous attempts at learning Haxe or Java, touching the C# code felt pretty familiar, though I hated the whole process (there might be at least 1 rant about it :P) of developing this project because of tons of stuff (the way things work with the CMS, ASP.NET Web Forms, the way it handles layouts, the way it loads things, did I say ASP.NET Web Forms already?).

I'm just relieved now because I received an e-mail that the client reeeally calmed down, the project's almost done and needs just some adjustments before it's sent for homologation.

Now it mostly needs content.

And I can also properly sleep.

YAY.

Updating code for big client.

Find that they are not encrypting passwords in the database and are not sanitizing user input from forms.

Do not trust the user!

NO. NO. A THOUSAND TIMES: NO.

I clicked on this out of genuine curiosity to see if someone was finally trying to discourage people from annoying the shit out of website visitors. A summary of the suggestions in their article as to what to use popups for:

1. Announce new products/services, features, policy updates, new blog posts
2. Promote your sales or coupons (including countdowns)
3. Encourage people to input their e-mail address / subscribe, perhaps also offering some vague thing they will get as a reward for doing so
4. Contact forms (e.g. support etc.)
5. Prompt visitors to confirm their age before showing content
6. Login/register forms
7. Display social media "share" buttons when a visitor has scrolled a certain way through the page content.
8. Display cookie consent prompt.
9. Help guide visitors to the part of the website they want to go to.

Of these: 1, 2, 3, and 7 need to die for sure. If a website does any of these things I'm inclined to immediately leave and never return. 8 is a little annoying but seems a necessity.

Someone even replied to the Tweet saying that popups are annoying, the company responded with "let's change that!"

Blank portions of the screenshot are to avoid promoting the company unintentionally as a result of the rant ;)

PayPal always making me laugh. A photo I tweeted some years ago...
Translation:
Placeholder: (Optional)
Validation: This field is mandatory

Fucking websites that has forms with an option to opt-out (instead of opt-in) for newsletters.

Translation of the image:
"I do not want receive the monthly newsletter with discounts and informarion about the newest smartphones"

How fucking degraded you must be to ask a visitor to login so he can search a product on your ecommerce site. How the fuck making an account is going to convert into sales, if that user yet hadn’t found what he’s looking for and don’t want to waste his time filling your stupid register forms? Why the fuck, ecommerce site forces an account on their customers at all? Looking at you aliexpress.

Is it some kind of China’s spying scheme?

A Visual Studio solution that had 62 (SIXTY TWO) projects for a webpage that was like 8 user forms total was like going to a shop to buy 3 items and receiving 15 tickets for that.
PMs saying no to refactoring due to not having enough time for a months. The first task took me 2 days just by fixing cyclic dependencies among the libraries. Went home and merged all the projects to just 3, building instantly in just two hours. Fuck idiot PMs that do not know how to code, buys shit and don't listen to devs. Fuck all idiots.

I had to make Google forms but it got boring after sometime (with drag and drop). So, I ended up learning regex. Phew! That was little hard.

Online applications are so much worse than the classic snail mail ones, because some companies just don't seem to give a single fuck about the quality of their application application (hehe).

This results in such joyous things like:

• "Allowed file types: doc, docx, pdf, jpg, zip"
• "Max filesize 3mb"
• "One of your files does not meet the requirements" (doesn't tell you which)
• "Upload timed out, please try again"
• 403 forbidden
• "Your account does not have the necessary permissions to upload more than 4 files at once"
• clicking the submit button leads to a 404
• "Please explain why you want to work for us." 500 character limit
• Google forms

*clears throat*

Building turn based enemy AI for a strategy game can go fuck itself...

I'm normally able to work out other forms of AI but as soon as I try to work out how to build AI for TBS, I just seem to have my brain exit my body....

I've been at this for fucking hours and have no idea what the fuck I'm doing .-.

I swear upon the gods of the internet! Any time I am trying to read an article/blog post/anything and the site puts a god damn pop-up form asking me to sign up for something, I leave the site. ESPECIALLY ON MOBILE WHEN YOU CANT CLOSE THE DAMN WINDOW WITHOUT GIVING UP YOUR INFO.

And every time a client asks me to do this I nicely explain how much people hate pop-ups, 99% of the time I've closed the window or tab before I even read what the box is asking for, I don't care.

If the user is trying to read something, then they are trying to read something, and they don't want to be bothered with your ridiculous attempts for information gathering so you can spam them later.

FUCK ME!!

For a job, I have to create a form with more than 20 fields!! FUCK!!

The most shitty part is that I need to gather all the shit users fill in (if they even fill it in) and place in a shitty e-mail and send that to the client!! FUCK!!

Xamarin forms can be such a bitch sometimes (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻ .
I mean it's challenging
┬─┬ノ( º _ ºノ).

Why the fuck would someone use bootstrap . Seriously now . Only for the fucking grid ? For the forms ? For the useless js ? Why ?

Video call interviews are the best! You don’t even need trousers...

An IT guy told me during a phone meeting set up to talk about how he builds these web forms on a dumb CRM for a client of ours that he has been an IT professional for 25 years.

He says he doesn't know much about the codey stuff.

What do IT professionals do again?

I wish I could do TDD on my life decisions

So I've been working on this website now for a while and I'm finally near the end.

The client suddenly writes to me to ask me why there is captcha on some of the forms (register, post). He asks me to remove all captchas.

I explained to him why captchas are important and I even told him one old story of mine (basically I was noob and made that fatal mistake and suffered).

His response is to remove them anyway he didn't like them.

My response?
I keep this conversation in text form and screenshots, and I keep backups of it.

I have a feeling I'll need them.

So I finally got my senior project approved by my school's assistant principal (the one who deals with every student's project) and he said that the three forms of evidence I suggested were not enough. A quick summary of my project: I'm supposed to make a game engine in Java before April of 2017. Every student needs 3 forms of evidence that they did the project so I suggested screenshots of my work, the finished source code, and pictures of me actually working on it. In addition to all of that I would have a ton of documentation and sample projects to test different features of the engine. Well, he doesn't really understand that for a high school student, that's already enough work for a couple of years and thinks I need more evidence. So what does he do?

He requires me to find at least 5 people to test the engine and complete a survey about it. This normally wouldn't be a problem, except I'm a high school student and don't know more than 2 people who are fluent enough in Java to work on a game. And, I have to finish the project before January now to give the people enough time to work with it.

Long story short, I'm not even out of high school and I'm already experiencing the struggles of dealing with non-technical people.

My partner can't wrap her head around why I write all forms of communication in a formal matter, whether it be an email, bug report or text message.

I keep telling her you never know who you are actually talking to unless your face to face, anyone else agree with this logic?

Well SO blocked me from asking any more questions. Which is BS because I went back and edited my questions as I was told to.

Ohh well, I figured I would just make a new account. So I logged out. Put in a new email. Filled out all the forms confirmed my email and then I see "You cannot ask questions" WTH? Appentally it cached my browser, so when I signed back up it linked my two accounts together..

Well, looks like I'm making a new email..

Oh dear god no

Thanks from England!

Any alternative to Googles reCAPTCHA?

Backstory we have a contact form, in a bootstrap modal, loading the form as an ajax request. The form has (as of today) a captcha, as we where getting a lot of spam.

Guess what it does on safari? Right... It renders outside the modal and since there's no need for scrolling, bootstraps modal adds an overflow hidden to the body. Results in non submitable forms on some resolutions.

Any idea on how to fix this, or other captcha systems we could use (it's a Symfony app).

The joy of running your own experiments.

So, after several decades I can report the following about Asthma..

Or at least, the form I've got, as many decades ago I read a book about how there are different forms, and some apparently respond to exercise.

So, I regularly exercised, it went away.

Tried not regular exercising, its come back..

So, I'll try regular exercise again, and see if it goes away !

This has been a public service announcement.

Note: I've no idea how you tell the different types apart, perhaps someone else knows the answer to that one !

Programming on a train is always interesting. I expect a minimum of one dirty/confused look off a member of the public.

When people include the entire jQuery library to animate one single div 😑

God fucking damnit automating a client's "Job applicant form" system is the most boring shit l've ever done.
Get me some damn monkeys to do this
"Oh OK so I just have to take this form and turn it into HTML. Oh shit, 25 check box's, let's just copy paste this shit in over and over. Oh damn, forgot I have to change the name and value fields for each one. God damnit this is boring, I guess I have to"
Fucking hell it's annoying work, Boring, easy, no thought needed. Ended up turning this task into a drinking game. Every time the word "Management" came up, I took a shot. Got me pretty fucked up.
Client emails back; "Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, we have these 3 other forms we want you to automate".
Well fuck at this point I feel like more of an alcoholic than a developer.

Witch hunting:

I just spent the last 90 trying to fix a visual bug with the UI

I made a functional component to render pretty forms with minimal information in React
Turns out some random ass fields were not rendering with their respective lower borders

Refactored the shit out of the components
Actually got them to follow a strict styling

Two cups of coffee later it clicked: everything was perfectly functional, I just have a shitty small monitor and tried zooming in
WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT, IT'S THE FUCKING BORDER I WAS LOOKING FOR ALL ALONG!

Don't be like me: check les differents view ports

Curious did any of you have a specific reason to learn how to program?

I wanted to be involved in aerospace but realised I'd probably never be an Astronaut, but i could learn how to write the software that controls the spacecrafts!

Don't you just hate filling a sign-up form which is validated to such an extent that it even requires everything to be entered in capitals. UGH! JUST CONVERT TO CAPS IN YOUR BACKEND FOR GODS SAKE!!!

Just learnt perfectly what the below joke means:

'I wanted to improve the world, but they wouldn't give me the source code'

I really don't understand why the world is full of obsolete processes that people fight against daily when changing things ever so slightly could take the weight of the world off their shoulders. The same thing goes for my work, I work in finance, and we use a remote app built in Windows forms (not xaml or wpf, the original forms) and it's insecure, slow, buggy, and crashes whenever you press ESC (yes, really). Even worse, I've offered to rewrite their whole network for nothing, just the improvement to people's lives. And they say no! WELL FUCK YOU FOR BEING A PLAGUE ON THE FUCKING WORLD! Why do people insist on staying behind the times when the world could be such a beautiful place?!?

Wow so much hate for WordPress. Le me to the rescue 💀

Yes WP is bloated and crappy and full of security issues etc etc. Agreed. That doesn't mean it is useless though.

It is alright to use for someone who is not really good with web, someone who just needs a blog, someone who just needs a home page, about page and contact form with a possibility of updating photo and text once or two times a month.

It is not suitable for e-commerce nor lots of transactions/forms involving websites.

As long as you know what kind of horse/vehicle you are on, you won't end up in the dirt.

Client: There is currently no way for us to save forms to “the cloud” (yes they actually put the cloud in quotes)

Me: That would be because this software is installed on your onsite server infrastructure and is not cloud hosted in any way.

>be web designer at last company
>be put into marketing Dept
>do everything from design to dev, working closely with engineers in IT Dept
>whyamihere.png
>leave to join new tech startup
>get job title "Web Developer"
>startup forms a new marketing Dept
>be put into it

If I made £1 for every new JavaScript framework that came out, i would never need to work again.

Suck my hairy asshole, devs who disable paste for web forms. Or more likely, management softs who read in a trade magazine that paste is bad.

Are any of you guys sentimental about your early programming efforts? I still have my first few simple Python programs on my computer, from years ago!

print("hello world")

A form for an order checkout has a fucking stupid select box for comments... Options like "knock loudly" or "Ring doorbell"... 🤔

My wife had no way to put in a comment to say it needed to go to level 2! So I took over, inspected the element to make sure it wasn't using ID values for these stupid values, then replaced it with a text area with the same control ID, name and class.

Problem solved, felt like such a ninja 😉

Why isn't this ready for testing yet?

Could it be that despite multiple meetings emails and face to face conversations none of you have provided me with what I actually need?

Yes I can create you new email and SMS campaigns. But I need two little things first.
1 The template text.
2 The sign off forms from compliance

Without them I can't do shit. So stop chasing me on where we're at because I've been chasing you on this for two weeks.

This shit here is why I'm the grumpy It guy.

Bank holiday weekend setup...

We liked your portfolio work, but could you please show us an example of a Fibonacci sequence

ಠ_ಠ

As a web designer/developer I hate this recent trend of very light gray text fields on forms that have a white background. I don't want to have to peer at my screen for objects. My vision is average, so why would a client want this?

We can hide messages in images via steganography (or ZIP sewing), we can hide messages in sound via either sound-based transmission (like Morse) or waveform-based transmission (think oscilloscope art videos), we can transmit it in videos in like 300 different fucking combined forms...

Encryption isn't the ONLY way, yo. Social engineering and being a cheeky shithead can get it done too.

I love how hospital forms still have "Religion" in it like it's supposed to mean anything. If I put in "Satanist", what are you gonna do? Not give me a check-up? Spray holy water all over my body while I sizzle my way back to hell as if my temperature isn't hot enough? It's as if that's gonna kill me. I've been looking forward to that my whole life, boi. It's the same for government forms. What are you gonna do? Not allow me to pay my taxes? Sweet deal.

I'm just glad it's on a piece of paper, not some required online shit form that wouldn't let me proceed. Then again, it has "Sex" on it which I would love to answer with "too hot for you right now" or "born with an enlarged urethra and spiritual penises". I'm just glad there's no debate here on that one, just put F or M and get the fuck out of the receptionist's face.

Just kidding, I know sex actually means something. Like if you're a woman on your period, they can diagnose you with hysteria or witchcraft and you get a complimentary clit stimulation to chase that flu away.

No, really, I mean it.
F for Futanari
M for Meningitis

No, seriously. It's just the religion thing that's weird. I just shut the fuck up and put "Catholic" on that shit. It makes me wonder what they do with that information in online forms though. I think I remember a few online forms that require that information, some with dropdowns. Do you get routed to a different service with varying discounts and services?

Why on earth do sign up forms give you the option to opt OUT of email newsletters if they're going to send the bloody emails anyway?

devRant is great. It's like Yik Yak but for things I can relate to!

Man collapses in the street, his wife "help, we need a doctor".

Dev speaks up "I did recently move to a standing desk"

My dad: "Oh yeah, JavaScript, Java, I know that stuff! You know the Mars Rover is actually using JavaScript?"
Me: "Oh is it now?"
Dad: "Yeah lots of things use Java"
Me: "You mean JavaScript?"
Dad: "Yeah Java, JavaScript, you know like building website forms"
Me:" Yeah I know, yeah, I, know... -_-"

I feel like there's a better way to do this 😂

Some sign-up forms be like

"Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue"

Insert name.

António

The name can only contain letters.

Antonio

Name not found.

At my workplace, we are working on the codebase from 1999. It's built on Oracle Forms and Reports. Fuck my life 😔

Does anybody else hate it when people call themselves "Coders" or say they're "Coding" as much as i do? It just seems childish due to the word's association with extremely beginner forms of programming like scratch. Personally, i think if you want to sound professional, you say programmer. Is it just me?

interview from the other side. A month ago I was looking for frontend dev for team I lead.
Now I believe that it was a nightmare for one guy, whos bio was full of js, angular and a little of php. Thought that he will be the man we were looking for.
Nope. I've started with classic (I suppouse) questions, like call and apply difference. Guy couldn't even manage to say a word. Went to bubbling, nothing. Ok sth easier, hoisting... Maybe at least you're minifying your code? donno what is. Ok so what you actually did from js? "I know jQuery, did something in this, and did full angular app to build forms, store and send them", but after question what Factory is he covered his face in hands, went still for about three minutes and probably would start to cry but we stopped this. I feel sorry for this guy, but he applied for senior frontend position.

JSF: Yeah, we make it so can focus on what's important and you never have to write HTML or CSS like those lowly web developers.

Also JSF: You can't nest <h:form> components because nested forms are invalid HTML. Oh, that breaks the composite component you were trying to use? Ha, fuck off.

Primefaces: You know how you can just provide an ID and OverlayPanel will open on its own? Well, for a Dialog, the API is completely different. Here's a glob of JavaScript in an onclick event.

I swear this entire thing was regurgitated by a murder of seagulls.

I have an idea and I want some feedback.

I'm the only web developer and I've been updating our systems so they can be maintainable. Previously we have used Wordpress for landing pages which is complete overkill So here's the idea:

Static sites for landing pages and any forms that would need to filled out would be on a separate site.

Ok so here me out. First the landing pages barely need any maintenance so using pure HTML/CSS/JS wouldn't be a problem. This means I can strip away all of the crap from Wordpress and make the load times faster. Second all of the landing pages forms would be hosted in a single place making analytics easier for the reporting system.

Really I just despise Wordpress and am trying any practical reason to not use it as much as possible. Oh and don't worry I'll use preprocessors and minify the production files.

I HATE pop-up signup forms! Why do they show up on EVERY single site I visit! 😡

<input type="tel" name="et" value="home" />

Do you guys ever feel like you lose the ability to be objective about your own work. I've looked at my website for so long now, I don't know if I think it's good or not...

xamarin forms sucks..
Everytime I want some widget or something even simple, they tell me to use custom renderers (write it natively on each platform)..

so, how is that supposed to be cross-platform..
after all, like I always said, to use xamarin efficiently, you must have good knowledge on native development for each platform

I am a CS student. I can do core programming(like solving a basic problems) stuff pretty well but, I can't seem to understand UI design.
I was learning web development.
Learnt the basics of HTML, CSS then thought "let's make a simple website".
Couldn't design a single thing.
I mean i know the concepts how to implement forms tables navs etc stuff. But main problem is I can't think of good design.

Am I just not made for web dev or what?
How to be a web dev? I am following Angela Yu's udemy course, should i try freecodecamp?

Login forms be like...

Source: twitter / @sitnikcode

Worked on project that has multiple forms. After deployment colleague asks me if I made the Chrome in-build autofill form function. He really liked and loved the option. Colleague calls himself front-end developer. True story!

Xamarin Build Started....

I want a robot that can do just one thing, just so I can say fuck you to these forms.

Well that, and maybe one other thing but let’s not talk about that😉

You know, like be able to see what cars and signs look like in pictures. Geez, what the hell were you thinking about.

body {
overflow-x: hidden;
}

is a bit like trying to fix a broken arm by wearing a long sleeve shirt 😅

Amen...

When your company forces you to program forms on the webpage with the sole intention of capturing your data then blasting you with emails, phone calls, and texts :( sometimes I really do hate my job

Dell is such awful machine to use with ubuntu even it was officially ubuntu installed machine it has so much issues and my work is suffering because of this machine which costs me 70k PKR. Having 8gb ram 500hdd, core i3 processor 4th gen.
I'm suffering from wifi getting disconnected time to time I couldn't find help on ubuntu forms nor on official dell site
I guess both sucks pretty bad

will atleast never buy dell machine again nor with stupid ubuntu os just

Are people using Vim doing it for the sake of it? Is there such a thing as a Vim hipster?

I mean, nano is just nicer 😇

Fuck you Oracle Forms and fucking database locks.

It's like everytime you tell your PM that you need to be left alone to code their projects, it goes in one ear and out the other. I usually ignore them when busy coding, but then they start to blow you up on all forms of communication. Where are you? Why aren't you answering me? It's because I am coding away on all of your projects. If we sit here for hours talking, nothing would get done! Like was it necessary to message and call me on several forms of communication??

Our favorite ticket system blokes are back with a big fat update for their software.

What changed?
All workflows are fucked because everything is somewhere else suddenly!

Half of the features suddenly stopped working!

Variable formats in forms have been changed from {} to [] without reason, migration or warning! Sorry, {Username} ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Half-assed features that don't work half of the time have also been added!

Fucking great!

Who beta tests this shit? Nobody?

I don't know why... But I cringe when somebody says "coding", "coder". Maybe it's because it's an Americanism...

So I got the examn project, which is nice. But then I saw the line in the picture:

"The programming language has to be C# using Windows Forms in MS Visual Studio"

I've added an emoji that expresses how I feel about it. Or in other words, SEND HELP.

Really, H&R Block? A max password size? For something this important?

3.5 fucking hours wasted. Trying to get a fucking webform to post using smtp and swiftmailer. Fucking webforms, I fucking hate them. Done it now though.

Managers, the more time you require of devs to fill out forms and such, the less time they have to devote to the tasks they're assigned.. please keep this in mind.

when you build the whole landing page, forms, php mail sender, SMTP, marketing integrations, analytics and all of that from scratch, and 1 hour before it goes live your boss tells you to change some inputs on the form.

Building CMS for one of our client on demand. Young client seemed to be pretty upset, when we told him, that all the functionality including all the forms had to be build from scratch. He told us, he thought it is there in the computer "by nature" and does not need to be programmed.

Service's like freelance and people per hour are a farce. It's just a constant race to the bottom price-wise.

'Yeah sure I can make you a blog website in 24 hours for £5'

Static UI designs are no longer acceptable for site or applications. UX today is equally about the large and subtle animations. The way to forms, boxes, text, header and buttons react with the users choices. Handing a dev an image of an apps view is doing half the job in today’s web market.

I remember I couldn't compile a clean Xamarin Forms project on Visual Studio because of a System.TimeZoneInfoNotFoundException. The workaround?, changed my time zone to Central time USA-Canada. So apparently it is not allowed to use Xamarin in the third world...

Is there any C# developer?

Rebuilding my poetry website with React and Material Design. Adding a file upload page. Is it just me, or is simply super fucking easier embedding Google Forms in a web app, than working through form validation in JavaScript.

still using windows forms w/ c# for desktop programs.

So when we started this project like 4 years ago... new to the framework, kickstarting lot's of forms with file uploads. Everything seemed to work fine, uploads and downloads worked..
First version of the project got deployed to prod and for weeks or so users have been registering and submitting stuff...

Only problem was: most files were overridden by consecutive uploads as our central upload lib stored files with the same name on disk (normally the ID of the db row was injected but most files were saved before the db row was - resulting in 0 IDs...)
Yeah so... that hurt :(

Nothing like being handed a stack of paper forms made in Word with the note "make this into one of those apps please". Sigh.

So in my current workplace we have an IT department of... 7-8 people, with 3 developers (or 2.5, but that's debatable)

The oldest dev is old school, over 65 now came from Visual Basic, of course, and is a father of department's director - this is a story in of itself, but besides the point of this rant

Anywho, this dev is of course in this workplace way longer than me, and historically is in charge of finance and Microsoft CRM systems.

Guess the reason why Microsoft CRM was chosen at all in the company?

Because dev said he is not good with creating web forms from scratch, and apparently with MSCRM you can craft them without much trouble.

Yes, that's it, our MSCRM is used as a web application with custom forms that store data into custom DB tables that dev creates... nothing to do with actual CRM use cases.

The first 30 minutes of a working day often consist of me saying, "who broke this then?" Then a liberal use of git blame.

upgrade to the latest pre-release of Xamarin forms for a shiny new feature, now nothing works even after reverting. You'd think I should know better by now.

I fucking hate asp.net web forms. Today we implemented listboxes, so we expected them to just be a wrapper for HTML listboxes. NOPE! They are simply selects. Why they decided to hijack the name and do this, I don't know. That does explain why they don't have multiple columns like true listboxes.

So glad that for the next project, which we should start by the end of May, we'll be moving to MVC and .Net core. This shit is so stupid!

I've been writing various forms of OOP for three years and just now learned exactly what static means

I'm considering going to Linux for my main operating system since windows 10 is bugging the heck out of me. Although, my main IDE is visual studio 2015. What IDEs are out there for .NET development in Linux and what are their pitfalls compared to VS 2015, if any? Are you still able to create all the things in that as in VS? I'm usually working in MVC and ADP.net forms and maybe the occasional console app in C#.

No offense to anyone who uses it, but I can't stand ASP.net web forms. It just feels so wrong. Then to add the unexplainable behaviour that fixes it's self after creating a new file and pasting in the previous contents without changes.

Asdfdhfjjdsha

Sorry needed that off my chest :)

Desk fans whirling. Sweating co-workers. An extra short stand-up.

That's right, the English summer has arrived.

Finishing up the last few edits on the WordPress site from hell, client is here to see the finished product, senior dev looks over at me "so are the registration/login forms and sign out button working correctly again?"

Me: "yeah I'm just checking one thing first-SON OF A BITCH"

senior: "that does not instill confidence that the forms are working"

Wasn't a big deal, forgot to close a div and, well you know how that works

My colleague had some problems today.
He had problems from both user input and predefined strings sent with ajax to backend. The "&"-sign was splitting values in GET-requests into unintended parameters. So... he was simply going to search and replace all of those signs with the word "and"...

encodeURI()? Why are you sending our forms with GET-requests?! 🙃

me: [fiddling with ideas for practicing HTML forms]
college: you wanna practice development, huh?
me: ...yeah?
college: fuck you. i have shit for you to look at which overrides what you want to do. LOOK AT ME!

My fascination for programming began around 13, when i started developing plugins for my minecraft server in java.
Had an awesome time with creating plugins for some fully custom servers with relatively large playerbases(50-200 players, depended on the time of the day).
This sparked something in me, and i started creating crapp ass "portfolio" sites for myself with php and mysql login and registration forms. After that I got into some basic c# abd had fun with some cute console/form applications.
And here comes today, in the process of picking up more css, php, html, js knowledge, probably heading towards react or vue.
I just love programming to death.

Father of my IT director. He was good with VB6. Now he is abusing MS Dynamics by using it to just host custom html forms and his DB main working table (which just mimics the fields of the CRM entity he has created is edging on 300 fields. He reuses same entity for 10 different non related "applications" (custom html forms... just CRUD) so majority of rows in that table use up to 30 fields...

My first task as a developer was to make a 20-year-old migrated-to-winforms application with over 1500 forms dpi compatible because apparently someone used it at 125% (acceptable by some law) and it was simply unusable and looked horrendous😩

I need to stop treating an OO language as if it were a procedural language.

I have the tendency to turn my code into GOTO spaghetti even though I'm semi-aware that objects exist and that they are distinct.
I still have to get used to this paradigm.

My Java professor always swore by the Plato paradigm, i.e.:
""Platonism" and its theory of Forms (or theory of Ideas) denies the reality of the material world, considering it only an image or copy of the real world.
According to this theory of Forms there are at least two worlds: the apparent world of concrete objects, grasped by the senses, which constantly changes, and an unchanging and unseen world of Forms or abstract objects, grasped by pure reason (λογική). which ground what is apparent." (wikipedia)

Thinking in objects, abstractions and metaphysics is not something I haven't done before (I've practiced it during Sociology and Ethics with the whole Pascal Leibniz, Newton and DesCartes approach) but it's certainly not easy.

Then there was my cool Programming 201 professor who said: "Don't worry man, just read those great UML, Program Design and GOF books and it will all become easy, like a story. It'll all make sense.
I mean, I've graduated, I've passed my Software Engineering I, II and III (hard as hell) but since I haven't focused on those theories and practices anymore, I've lost my touch.

It's definitely not easy for a novice programmer to transition between paradigms..

I had a complaint about a product I bought from a store a while back. I was resistant to taking into the store because the people there make you feel like you are stealing when trying to return a defective DVD. So I contacted the store via their website. I put in my first and last name and my email in the message to them. This is an excerpt of what I got back:

---

Response By Email (Triston) (12/12/2019 03:56 AM)
Hi Phuckin,

Your satisfaction is our top priority and your comments have been forwarded to your local Store. The management team there will take appropriate action and you can expect a response from them within three business days.
<store specific info>

Customer By (Phuckin Chit) (12/11/2019 03:40 PM)
<details of my complaint, etc>

---

Apparently I had created an account with this store a while back when I was angry. Hence my name being reported as Phuckin Chit. Even though I entered my name in the form it used the stored name associated with my email. At this point I am not sure they are going to help me.

Damn you Oracle forms! And OVM manager, you can go to hell as well. And take everything else connected with Oracle with you please

npm install yarn

I feel guilty...

algolia.com is a piece of fucking shit, trying to use the search on the reasonml forms just pisses me off and makes me want to punch a baby in the face!!!

The more I work on the backend forms validation side of my .NET Core project the more I understand how to fuck up web forms in general... 😈

Never underestimate the necessity of a backend validation other then the frontend one. 👿

Fun fact: If you ever want to see the password you are typing or view the contents of a password field in a form, just pull up the web inspector. You can change the input type from "password" to "text" with no ill effects upon submission.

The lesson? When populating password fields, put junk values in there instead. Will present the right appearance, and doesn't risk exposing something that should be stored as a salted hash anyway.

I'm currently doing project in Java using JavaFX for GUI and after like 6 months I found out we can bind textfields to variables(yea,dumb me) and I got more than 20 forms so of course, binding is useful than that getText method. So I think there are many things like this which will help me to optimize my code but I dont know, so can anyone tell me more stuff like this?
I'm using MongoDb so I'm currently finding easiest way to make Bson document from textfield values. Any suggestions?
(Sorry, for my bad English)

So, this week I started working on my first mobile app with Xamarin Forms. I already have a login and register functionality. The mobile app is connected to an Laravel API and SQL database. Happy with the progress so far.

I am new to C# so I had some struggles, but after some days I began to really like it.

Best: i learned a lot this year, cant really highlight anything but i got better at networking stuff, im happy about that

Worst: using xamarin forms probably, it was a literal hellhole and midway through the project microsoft abandoned winphone so there was absolutely no reason to keep using that shit

So I spent 2 hours trying to debug my HTML form with data pulled from database. I kept updating the data in the database but the forms weren't changing. Then it finally struck me, Firefox fucking caches form fields on page reload. I use to think this was a convinient feature but now it's just a pain in the ass.

Gotta love generated code *cough*

website: fill in all fields
user: john doe
kill blood, texas, 751454, usa
me: when the website says street name, we meant the name of your faking street!

I love how our industry has invented such important sounding yet meaningless job titles...

Developer, software engineer, software architect, developer evangelist, dev ops engineer, systems analyst, quality assurance engineer, code monkey...

FML!!!!!! I FUCKING HATE THE COMBINATION OF XAMARIN FORMS AND MY COWORKERS.

Explanation:

I had to refactor all of our views because my coworkers did anything in the code-behind file from the views but the code should be in the viewmodels.

I had an "Unhandlex Exception" without any stacktrace or error message for a hour. What was the error? In the xaml file of the view was still an OnClicked-handler of a button but i removed the method from the view-code-behind-file.

FML

I developed a simple feedback form, that captures user feedback and forwards it to a customer care email.

Today, I received a call from someone who was sub-contracted to create a system that would ingest these feedback emails and process the data to have some desired result.

So dude wants me to change the way the email is formatted. Because there are "line feeds" in the email. Essential making it computer readable as opposed to human readable. I don't have a problem doing that but I'm wondering if he ever heard of regular expressions.