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Search - "ping"
-
Client: We have a HUGE security problem.
Me: *thinks about any possible vulnerabilities* What is it?
Client: A user can take a picture of our website and steal our content.
I’m done for today.36 -
Client: This works correctly, but I don’t like the code.
Me: What exactly do you not like?
Client: There are barely any lines of code. You need to add more to make it better.
I...I don’t know what to say.26 -
So I just got one of those pop ups saying YOUR COMPUTER HAS BEEN HACKED.
I decided to call the number, while firing up a Linux virtual machine, running Linux Mint. I customized the home button to look like the Windows start menu logo, and proceeded to let that scammer connect to it.
He was so confused, considering the script he was reading off of was meant for windows. He opened up terminal, and started typing in "tree" and told me that's how many viruses I have.
😂😂😂21 -
So the person from my previous rant actually tried to make AI in HTML.
Person: I made that AI in HTML today!
Me: Oh really?
Person: Yup. *Opens HTML site*
It was a site that
1) Used JavaScript
2) Was a prompt(), and after answering it alerts "Yes" or "No" randomly.
Me: That's not AI
Person: Uhh yeah it is. It uses a neural network to answer!
Me: Actually, a neural network is a dot product of an input and vectors that are refined using partial derivatives.
Person: Yeah! That's what Math.random() and alert() do!
I left that room as quickly as I could (yet again).31 -
Me: *accidentally opens DevTools*
1.269427 milliseconds later...
Person: TEACHER! He’s HACKING INTO GOOGLE DRIVE!!!
Teacher: *glances at computer* Oh my gosh! That is ILLEGAL! Go to the office immediately.
I reluctantly headed to the office and calmly explained what happened. Luckily, some people have a bit of common sense and let me go.23 -
Today, I learned the shortest command which will determine if a ping from your machine can reach the Internet:
ping 1.1
This parses as 1.0.0.1, which thanks to Cloudflare, is now the IP address of an Internet-facing machine which responds to ICMP pings.
Oh, you can also use this trick to parse 10.0.0.x from `10.x` or 127.0.0.1 from `127.1`. It's just like IPv6's :: notation, except less explicit.12 -
Person: I want to learn to code neural networks and cool AI stuff.
Me: Look into Python or Lua.
Person: Those are too hard, I'm going to use HTML instead.
I got out of there as fast as I could. 😅11 -
I was in school and I got bored. I opened two command prompts and did what any scammer would do.
I went to the root of the drive and did a tree. The other window is pinging google infinitely.
After a few seconds, I hear a kid say "Are you hacking the pentagon?". That guy also asked me to hack the Google Play Store. He shall forever think I'm a hacker.36 -
After listening to two of our senior devs play ping pong with a new member of our team for TWO DAYS!
DevA: "Try this.."
Junior: "Didn't work"
DevB: "Try that .."
Junior: "Still not working"
I ask..
Me:"What is the problem?"
Few ums...uhs..awkward seconds of silence
Junior: "App is really slow. Takes several seconds to launch and searching either crashes or takes a really long time."
DevA: "We've isolated the issue with Entity Framework. That application was written back when we used VS2010. Since that application isn't used very often, no one has had to update it since."
DevB: "Weird part is the app takes up over 3 gigs of ram. Its obviously a caching issue. We might have to open up a ticket with Microsoft."
Me: "Or remove EF and use ADO."
DevB: "That would be way too much work. The app is supposed to be fully deprecated and replaced this year."
Me: "Three of you for the past two days seems like a lot of work. If EF is the problem, you remove EF."
DevA: "The solution is way too complicated for that. There are 5 projects and 3 of those have circular dependencies. Its a mess."
DevB: "No fracking kidding...if it were written correctly the first time. There aren't even any fracking tests."
Me:"Pretty sure there are only two tables involved, maybe 3 stored procedures. A simple CRUD app like this should be fairly straight forward."
DevB: "Can't re-write the application, company won't allow it. A redesign of this magnitute could take months. If we can't fix the LINQ query, we'll going to have the DBAs change the structures to make the application faster. I don't see any other way."
Holy frack...he didn't just say that.
Over my lunch hour, I strip down the WPF application to the basics (too much to write about, but the included projects only had one or two files), and created an integration test for refactoring the data access to use ADO. After all the tests and EF removed, the app starts up instantly and searches are also instant. Didn't click through all the UI, but the basics worked.
Sat with Junior, pointed out my changes (the 'why' behind the 'what') ...and he how he could write unit tests around the ViewModel behavior in the UI (and making any changes to the data access as needed).
Today's standup:
Junior: "Employee app is fixed. Had some help removing Entity Framework and how it starts up fast and and searches are instant. Going to write unit tests today to verify the UI behaivor. I'll be able to deploy the application tomorrow."
DevA: "What?! No way! You did all that yesterday?"
Me: "I removed the Entity Framework over my lunch hour. Like I said, its basic CRUD and mostly in stored procedures. All the data points are covered by integration tests, but didn't have time for the unit tests. It's likely I broke some UI behavior, but the unit tests should catch those."
DevB: "I was going to do that today. I knew taking out Entity Framework wouldn't be a big deal."
Holy fracking frack. You fracking lying SOB. Deeeep breath...ahhh...thanks devRant. Flame thrower event diverted.13 -
There's this guy that sits next to me in a class.
Guy: Hey, you're a hacker right?
Me: I'm a programmer.
Guy: Can you hack into my email account?
Me: Nope, I work in a different field of computer science.
In reality, I want to give him a piece of my mind.
I already know his email so I open up the login page and enter it. I click "forgot password", and it asks for his favorite teacher's name. Keep in mind that he made this account this year.
Me: So anyways, who's your favorite teacher?
Guy: *proceeds to give me favorite teacher's name*
Me: 🤦♂️
I change his password and log into his account. After that, I show him and tell him about how he should keep his account secure.
He left class with a priceless look on his face.15 -
Today (as a joke), I asked my class if there were any “professional HTML programmers” who could help me.
Surprisingly a couple people came over with smirks on their face. I thought they were going along with the joke.
Turns out, they were serious. They legitimately believed that they were professional HTML programmers and talked to me in such a condescending way that I was speechless.
“This is called a file. See that part after the dot? That’s what makes it HTML. HTML is an incredibly hard programming language and powers CPUs and the computer that you are using.”
I didn’t know how to respond. Hopefully they were joking.9 -
Anyone know this bitch hacker 127.0.0.1 story?
WORST HACKERS OF ALL TIME
CONTINUED IN THE COMMENTS BECUASE IT IS SO LONG...
TLdr bitch hacker hacks himself by localhost
bitchchecker (~java@euirc-a97f9137.dip.t-dialin.net) Quit (Ping timeout#)
bitchchecker (~java@euirc-61a2169c.dip.t-dialin.net) has joined #stopHipHop
<bitchchecker> why do you kick me
<bitchchecker> can’t you discus normally
<bitchchecker> answer!
<Elch> we didn’t kick you
<Elch> you had a ping timeout: * bitchchecker (~java@euirc-a97f9137.dip.t-dialin.net) Quit (Ping timeout#)
<bitchchecker> what ping man
<bitchchecker> the timing of my pc is right
<bitchchecker> i even have dst
<bitchchecker> you banned me
<bitchchecker> amit it you son of a bitch
<HopperHunter|afk> LOL
<HopperHunter|afk> shit you’re stupid, DST^^
<bitchchecker> shut your mouth WE HAVE DST!
<bitchchecker> for two weaks already
<bitchchecker> when you start your pc there is a message from windows that DST is applied.
<Elch> You’re a real computer expert
<bitchchecker> shut up i hack you
<Elch> ok, i’m quiet, hope you don’t show us how good a hacker you are
<bitchchecker> tell me your network number man then you’re dead
<Elch> Eh, it’s 129.0.0.1
<Elch> or maybe 127.0.0.1
<Elch> yes exactly that’s it: 127.0.0.1 I’m waiting for you great attack
<bitchchecker> in five minutes your hard drive is deleted
<Elch> Now I’m frightened
<bitchchecker> shut up you’ll be gone
<bitchchecker> i have a program where i enter your ip and you’re dead
<bitchchecker> say goodbye
<Elch> to whom?
<bitchchecker> to you man
<bitchchecker> buy buy
<Elch> I’m shivering thinking about such great Hack0rs like you
bitchchecker (~java@euirc-61a2169c.dip.t-dialin.net) Quit (Ping timeout#)
bitchchecker (~java@euirc-b5cd558e.dip.t-dialin.net) has joined #stopHipHop
<bitchchecker> dude be happy my pc crashed otherwise you’d be gone
<Metanot> lol
<Elch> bitchchecker: Then try hacking me again… I still have the same IP: 127.0.0.1
<bitchchecker> you’re so stupid man
<bitchchecker> say buy buy
<Metanot> ah, [Please control your cussing] off
<bitchchecker> buy buy elch
bitchchecker (~java@euirc-b5cd558e.dip.t-dialin.net) Quit (Ping timeout#)
bitchchecker (~java@euirc-9ff3c180.dip.t-dialin.net) has joined #stopHipHop
<bitchchecker> elch you son of a bitch
<Metanot> bitchchecker how old are you?
<Elch> What’s up bitchchecker?
<bitchchecker> you have a frie wal
<bitchchecker> fire wall
<Elch> maybe, i don’t know
<bitchchecker> i’m 26
<Metanot> such behaviour with 26?
<Elch> how did you find out that I have a firewall?
<Metanot> tststs this is not very nice missy
<bitchchecker> because your gay fire wall directed my turn off signal back to me
<bitchchecker> be a man turn that shit off
<Elch> cool, didn’t know this was possible.
<bitchchecker> thn my virus destroys your pc man
<Metanot> are you hacking yourselves?
<Elch> yes bitchchecker is trying to hack me
<Metanot> he bitchchecker if you’re a hacker you have to get around a firewall even i can do that
<bitchchecker> yes man i hack the elch but the sucker has a fire wall the
<Metanot> what firewall do you have?
<bitchchecker> like a girl
<Metanot> firewall is normal a normal hacker has to be able to get past it…you girl
<He> Bitch give yourself a jackson and chill you’re letting them provoce you and give those little girls new material all the time
<bitchchecker> turn the firewall off then i send you a virus [Please control your cussing]er
<Elch> Noo
<Metanot> he bitchchecker why turn it off, you should turn it off
<bitchchecker> you’re afraid
<bitchchecker> i don’t wanna hack like this if he hides like a girl behind a fire wall
<bitchchecker> elch turn off your shit wall!
<Metanot> i wanted to say something about this, do you know the definition of hacking??? if he turns of the firewall that’s an invitation and that has nothing to do with hacking
<bitchchecker> shut up
<Metanot> lol
<bitchchecker> my grandma surfs with fire wall
<bitchchecker> and you suckers think you’re cool and don’t dare going into the internet without a fire wall
<Elch> bitchchecker, a collegue showed me how to turn the firewall off. Now you can try again
<Metanot> bitchhacker can’t hack
<Black<TdV>> nice play on words
<bitchchecker> wort man
<Elch> bitchchecker: I’m still waiting for your attack!
<Metanot> how many times again he is no hacker
<bitchchecker> man do you want a virus
<bitchchecker> tell me your ip and it deletes your hard drive
<Metanot> lol ne give it up i’m a hacker myself and i know how hackers behave and i can tell you 100.00% you’re no hacker..31 -
Oh man, when a simple prank goes out of control.
Tl;dr incompetent IT don't know their shit and want to shut down server because of a simple batch file.
Long story time;
For the last day at my side job I thought it would be funny to run a small batch script on one of the PC's (that is not even connected to the internet...).
All it did was echo some random russian characters to the screen, ping itself for a couple of bytes, and echo "success" at random intervals. Ofcourse in the classic green/black CMD...
Pressing any key would stop this, and I didn't do anything to prevent it from being closed/stopping.
Now this was running for a couple of minutes when a colleague spotted it and completely freak out, literally. He ran to the floor chief, who took a look, freaked out, and called in IT...
Now our IT section isn't exactly what I'd call competent, as I've ranted about before... So he turned up, failed at comprehending what was going on, told everyone to not touch the computer and directly went full fucking retard and wanted to shut down the entire server.
OhFuck.jpg this is escalating quicker than I thought.
Fortunately for him he didn't have the rights to do that himself, so he ran off to call his chief to do it.
My floor chiefs knows I do also do programming so he came up to me asking if I could take a look at it to figure out it was doing, so I walked up "took a look" and told him I can probably stop this. Hit the enter key to stop it, deleted the batch file and shut off the computer.
Told my chief this should work as a temporary solution but IT should do a full check of their systems.
Fast forward a couple of hours and head of IT is still trying to figure out what happened and checking their systems.. luckily he wasn't dumb enough to actually shut everything down7 -
Building a website for a client. Asked what URL they would like for the domain name...
Their reply:15 -
Person: Your website doesn't work.
Me: Why?
Person: Nothing happens when I click.
Me: Did you disable JavaScript?
Person: Yeah, sounds shady.6 -
Person: *glances at my grades*
Me: Here we go again.
Person: I thought you were smart. How did you manage to get a C?!
It was a C (programming language) quiz. 🙄7 -
I had a client reach out to me to build a website for a company they’re starting.
The email was well-written and I was considering doing it—but then I read the last sentence.
“I think it’s appropriate for you to do it for free since I took the time to reach out to you”10 -
I've been fortunate enough to work with a lot of awesome people early into my career.
At the company I worked where I met @trogus, I became friends with a few people, including Tim, that I think were my favorites. It was a really fun bunch and though it may sound immature, but a lot of the times it felt like we were kids so for me coming out of college it was awesome.
There's so many stories from working with that bunch that come to mind for me. One of my best friends there was this guy "Dirty Devin." He started around the same time I did. When I first met him he seemed really boring and professional. After getting to know him, and after he'd been at the company for a few weeks, his actual personality started to show and he was like a child (in the best way possible) and was absolutely hilarious/made the work place a blast.
Our office had a ping pong table and neither Dirty Devin or I had ever really played. We started playing against each other and we both very quickly got really good.
I also met a guy named Botond (he's the one in the photo). He was very similar to Dirty Devin. Lots of crazy stories but the photo is actually a really funny one - we both got to work a few minutes early one day. And we couldn't get into the office. We kept trying to enter the door code and it wouldn't work. We kept joking that we must both be fired. Turned out that they had fired someone the night before and didn't bother to send out the new door code :/
And of course, Tim. I think we clicked pretty early on and had the same friend group at the company.3 -
employee: I want growth in my role
company: *installs ping pong table*
employee: autonomy?
company: *creates fully-stocked snack room*
employee: fulfilment.
company: *employs a live DJ in the office*
employee: *quits*
company: some people just aren't a good culture fit.6 -
There’s a fundamental difference between development and other jobs.
Doctor: Hey! My left arm is hurting and has been swollen for a while, I think it might be sprained. *pays $100*
Taxi Driver: Hey! Can you ride me over to this exact address? Thanks. *pays $20 + tip*
Construction Worker: I’m going to need this exact item in the blueprint built here with these materials. *pays $1000*
Mechanic: This part of my car isn’t working correct and it displays this exact warning. *pays $100*
Developer: Yo I need a cool free website that looks pretty awesome with like rainbows and stuff by tomorrow.18 -
One of my ex-girlfriends (who apparently still cares about me after several years 🤔) sent me this chain letter kind of thing wishing me 12 months without sickness, 52 weeks without stress, 365 days of luck, 8760 hours without fights, 525600 minutes of peace, and 31536000 seconds of happiness.
But that's not what I want mate! All I want is a year of <50ms ping!! 😝
I still kind of like her though, especially given that she's still thinking about me.. maybe I should have trying to go out with her again as one of my objectives for 2019?19 -
I have coronavirus. Went to ER because I couldn't breathe Sunday night. Thought I was fucked. I decide to try to work a couple hours today because I'm getting restless. I'm an associate and have been on a project about a month. No prior software job.
Anyway. They ask me to clone a repo and run some tests. Cool, I can do that. They give me another example to look at to make sure I'm running the test right. Except the test files aren't attached to the email nor is the path to them provided.
I ping the other associate developer on Skype and ask for the test files and get a passive aggressive response that they're in the email. No, they're not you fuck stick, hence why I'm fucking asking you, and given that I almost fucking died a couple days ago, you should be fucking grateful I even logged on. Motherfucker.
Ok I feel better now.19 -
https://google.com”f people near me wanted to show me something.
Person: Check out this zero-day exploit! I hacked into the system using a cloud-based cryptographically secure MD5 hash finite automata firewall HTML code API!
Me: Erm...what exactly did you hack?
Person: *shows screen while smirking*
It was a shell simulator website running “ping https://google.com”7 -
I really hate this company.
The code is a disaster. Every single other employee is a salesperson. Nobody has any bloody clue what I do or how difficult it is. They don't care about stability (unless things are crashing), maintenance (until crashing), code quality (until it delays features), or anything apart from shiny new features they can sell. The boss (the king salesman, if ever there was one) doesn't know how to manage, but tries to by acting like his "nice asshole" self -- he's an asshole that gives you passes, makes sure it's bloody obvious that he's doing it begrudgingly, yet everything is still absolutely your fault. If he arbitrarily decides it's too much your fault, he stops being "nice" and flips out on you in front of everyone. That's a "nice asshole": an asshole who can barely even pretend to be nice.
Fuck him.
And you know what? I really hate having to work next to these fucking birds, too.
Today was our weekly conference call, and I was both late and unprepared. I was too focused on my work, and got a ping 4 minutes into the meeting, so I obv didn't have time to prepare. Boss was also pissy today, and I didn't have much to show for my week, thanks to lots of little "OMG NEED ASAP" shit projects that all took too long, pushing back what I was actually supposed to work on. Which didn't get finished, of course, and today that project was "the most important" -- I suspect simply because it wasn't finished. AGADJFSKL. Cue the birds fucking screaming and never fucking shutting up no matter what I did. Blanket? No effect. Spray bottle? SCREAM MORE! Boss was yelling at me, the birds were screaming, and I couldn't think. Goddamn fucking disaster.
and yes, we have a macaw. A macaw and over 20 cockatiels. Said macaw decided today was a lovely day to just fucking SCREAM non-stop, and the tiels were doing their best to keep up. Thinking clearly during this cacophony? Not gonna happen.
Wait, "go elsewhere," you say? Somewhere quieter? Where is this "elsewhere?" We live in a fucking tiny house, and during the call it was (and still is) filled with sleeping people, and surrounded by a fucking desert. Who the fuck thought living in the desert was a good idea, anyway? Like, seriously. What brainless moron thought "You know what? This is a great place! Let's settle down right here," while trudging through the scorching sand and dust, looking at the basically lifeless horizon filled with large, hot, dry, dusty, barren rocks (aka "mountains"), and fucking dying from thirst? Probably someone so delirious from heatstroke they never actually recovered, and continued raving that it's a goddamn paradise to their heat-addled imbecile followers. I really hope they hallucinated a la-z-boy in place of a hedge of teddybear cholla and died an excruciating and prickly death. Fuck that guy/girl, too.
But I digress.
I seriously need an office that isn't a 30 min drive into gang-central. I'd work outside, but I live in the middle of the bloody fucking desert, and get heat exhaustion within about half an hour. Everywhere else in the house people bother me almost incessantly.
just. FUCKING FJASKLDFJGAG.
I HATE THIS PLACE SO SO SO MUCH.
'I've had such Zen lately,' Alex said. Maybe then, but lately? I've just been too exhausted and burned out from putting up with all this shit to get angry. Days like today? I could pour kerosene over everything and laugh as it all just burned to ash.rant it's a cool day at 96f/35c root has problems and fan the flames as your blazes burn root should see a shrink desert kerosene asshole boss when you fall i'll take my turn15 -
I’m a student who makes open source projects that are fairly popular and are used by several companies.
Today, I’m launching my Patreon campaign to hopefully fulfill my dreams of working on open source full-time.
Today is a good day.
https://patreon.com/kbrsh28 -
An intern I was supposed to lead (as an intern) and work with. Which sounded kinda crazy to me, but also fun so I rolled with it. But when I met her I quickly found out she didn't even have a coding editor installed and when I advised one she was "scared of virusses". She had Microsoft Edge in her toolbar, and some picture of a cat as a background. We were given some project by our boss, and a freelance programmer helped us set it up on Trello. Great, lets start! Oke maybe first some R&D, she had to reaeach how to use the Twilio API. After catching her on WhatsApp a few times I realised this wasnt gonna go anywere. After a few weeks of coding and posting a initial project to git I asked her if she could show me the code of the API she made so far..
She told me she was using the quickstart guide (the last 3 FUCKING weeks) which contained some test project with specific use cases.
The one that I did 3 weeks ago that same fucking morning.
AND SHE WAS STILL NOT DONE...
A few days later I asked her about the progress (strangly, I wasn't allowed ti give her another task bcs the freelanc already did) and guess what... She got fking pissed at me
Her: "I will come to you when im done, ok?"
Me: "I just want to see how it is going so far and if you are running into any problems!"
Her: "I dont want to show you right now"
She then goes to my fucking boss to tell him I am bothering her.
And omg... Please dear god please kill me now...
Instead of him saying the she probably didn't do shit. He says to me that the girl thinks im looking down on her and she needs a stress free environment to work in. She will show me when its done. ITS A FUCKING QUICKSTART GUIDE YOU DUMB BITCH.
He then procceeded to whine to me about the email template (another project I do at the same time) which didn't look perfect in all of his clients.
Dont they understand that I am not a frontend developer? Can you stop please? I know nothing about email templates, I told you this!!!
Really... the whole fucking internship the only thing the girl did was ask people if they want more tea. Then she starts cleaning the windows, talk to people for an hour, or clean everyone's dask.
all this while I already made 50% of the fucking product and she just finished the quickstart tutorial 😭. Truly 2 months wasted, and the worse thing is I didn't get any apprication. They constantly blamed me and whined at me. Sometimes for being 3 minutes late, the other for smoking too much, or because I drink to much coffee, or that I dont eat healthy. They even forced me to play Ping Pong. While im just trying to do my job. One of the worst things they got mad at me for if when my laptop got hacked bcs it was infected with some virus. He had remote access and bought 5 iPhones 6's with my paypal while I was on break. I had to go home and quickly reset all my passwords and make sure the iPhones wouldnt get delivered. strange this was, this laptop I only used at the company. So it must have been software I had to download there. Probably phpstorm (torrent). Bcs nobody would give me a license. And the freelancer said I * have to *.
the monday after I still had to reinstall windows so I called them and said I would be late. when I came they were so disrepectfull and didn't understand anything. It went a little like this:
Boss: why u late?
Me: had to reinstall my laptop, sorry.
Boss: why didnt you do this in your own time?
Me: well, I didn't have any time.
Boss: cant you do this in the weekend or something? Because now we have to pay you several hours bcs you downloaded something at home.
Me: I am only using this laptop for work so thats not possible.
Boss: how can that even be possible? You are not doing anything at home with your laptop? Is that why you never do anything at home?
Me: uhm, I have desktop computer you know. Its much faster. And I also need to rest sometimes. Areeb (freelancer) told me to torrent the software. He gave me the link. 2 days later this happends
Boss: Ahh okeee I see.. Well dont let it happen again.
After that nobody at the compamy trusted me with anything computer related. Yes it was my own fault I downloaded a virus but it can happen to anyone. After that I never used Windows again btw, also no more auto login apps.8 -
When I was studying OOP our teacher instructed us to submit a project at the end of semester. Me and my friend worked hard and enthusiastically and finished our first game in C++ (Ping Pong). We were very excited because we had put so much effort into it that we were 100% sure that our project will be the best among all. At the end of semester, turned out our teacher does not have much time to evaluate our projects, so instead he announced a motherfucking MCQ's quiz. Everyone got really really happy but I was thinking of multiple ways I could kill that bastard.2
-
Person: I liked your personal website’s design, is it ok if I use it?
Me: A personal website should reflect your own style of design. Try creating one instead of using mine.
Person: Oh well, I liked yours more so I used it. Thanks anyway!
They literally have an exact copy of the code with different content. 😒10 -
a litte piece of javascript pinging the server every minute to prevent user being logged out
$(document).ready(function() {
setInterval(ping, 60000);
});6 -
Conversations between 2 java programmers.
Me: How it's possible that your code works?
Frank: I don't know. I try 10 times, and each time, I get an error.
Then I take a break...
Eat a humburger, play ping pong, drink coffee.
Me: That's it?
Frank: Yes
Me: I need a break...5 -
1st post. Not sure if rant.
> Join 1st job after college.
> Desk assigned is close to a senior dev
> Random day, QA asks senior dev questions on something and coincidentally I happened to be working on the same thing.
> Senior dev borrows my system and explains qa something.
> By the end of explanation senior dev had bunch of shell commands written on notepasd on my machine.
> I don't understand jack shit of whats happening.
> QA looks at me and says, "Ping me once."
> I think, "no idea what just happened but must be something related to network ."
> I open terminal and type "ping" and quitely wait for further instructions (address to ping that is).
> Everyone starts laughing their asses off.
> QA guy opens slack, and sends himself the commands on text document.
> I realize what just happened
> Laugh awkwardly with everyone to ease the pressure
> FML7 -
> Open Quora
> Read highly upvoted answer that in essence says "ping - t localhost to make internet speed faster by 'sucking the wifi'"
> Realize that senior at office has upvoted it
> Jump out of the window2 -
Just noticed I've forgot to cancel pinging of my raspberry pi since yesterday. 11881 pings later, it is up.6
-
this is the state of hiring tests:
1. can you take an english sentence, and without a tutorial, write a for loop?
2. okay now write a full parser. but not in the language we want to hire you in.
also we can afford to pay you in bananas, experience, and exposure.
p.s. we also need you to do this backend test because this is a backend job even though the ad is for front end and you specified an hour ago when the interview started that you only trained for front.
on the positive side, we have a ping pong table and a bean bag chair. and a two hour commute. Think of the benefits!16 -
Ubuntu 18.04 is sooo beautiful 😊 I can't connect to WiFi or ping 8.8.8.8 but it's soooo beautiful 😊7
-
Working with a client...the resident """sysadmin""" hasn't actually been a sysadmin since the early 90s, the last OS he _actually_ managed was SunOS 5 or something. I can't remember what he said. He hasn't kept up AT ALL with modern technologies/terminologies. He's convinced SELinux is a security hardened kernel. We've explained to him several times that it's not but he sees Linux and thinks Linux 1.0 from the 90s. It's downright embarrassing.
Now this would all be well if I didn't have to interface with him often, but the client WILL NOT give me access to their systems. So I have to go through him to get anything done. Which is over webex. So I get to watch this guy type (and mess up) basic commands over and over (he isn't aware of tab completion of any of the bash features that are super useful). So I'm telling him what to type and the delay is always just enough for him to get too far in the command to back out, so its like SSH-over-incompetence with a 500ms ping. It's truly infuriating.
Every once in a while he'll get frustrated enough to hand me control of his webex session, which isn't as painful but once again the delay is bad enough it's still a pain.
Best part is that he looks EXACTLY like Milton from Office Space. So thats one plus to this whole situation!3 -
I hate all of these rants about JavaScript being a terrible language.
In reality, it's one of the easiest languages to work with. This makes it easier for new programmers to write messy code, but is it the language's fault?
People get mad about the things that happen when you multiply "undefined" and a string...what do you expect?
You also have the freedom to choose from a variety of tools the community has created to solve existing problems. People just don't realize that they don't *have* to learn everything, you just learn as you need them.
Don't blame JavaScript for you bad programming, terrible type conversion needs, and great tooling.23 -
I'll be moving to a new job soon. Myself and a colleague are working on a new feature before I leave. He's building an IoT device, i'm doing the backend work. Were testing a "ping" style system, where his IoT device replies to a message from the backend.
The JSON payload he's sending is {traitor: true}3 -
Doing Linux server management stuff via ssh with a FUCK 500ms PING IS NOT FUN AT ALL
GET OFF THE FUCKING NETWORK EVERYONE 😤😤😤😤😤5 -
I really fucking loathe StackExchange. Some poor soul had the nerve (THE NERVE!) to ask a question about something they didn't understand (HOW DARE THEY!):
"What is the difference between a ping and a get request? The goal is to see if the site is up."
And par for the course over at smarmy-fucking-smug-pedant-land, in less than three hours, the question was closed: "[C]losed as not a real question... It's difficult to tell what is being asked here. This question is ambiguous, vague, incomplete, overly broad, or rhetorical and cannot be reasonably answered in its current form.
Allow me to indulge in some pedantic, "well actually" fuckery of my own...
Well actually, that actually is a 'real' question, because it's, you know, a fucking question. There's a question mark in there and everything! The person is asking what the difference is between two different things, and we can tell it's actually two different things because the person uses two different fucking nouns. And not only is this person asking to know what the difference is between these two different things, they even give us a use-case for why they're asking the question: they're pretty sure that they think they might know there's at least two different ways to check that their website is up, they just want to know what the difference is between those two methods -- hence the two different fucking nouns. It's almost like they're trying to give us some contextual information about why they're asking so that even if there is some vagueness to their question -- which is bound to happen IF YOU KNOW YOU DON'T KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT THE SUBJECT, WHICH IS PROBABLY WHY YOU'RE FUCKING ASKING -- then a reasonable, decent, helpful person who is making a good-faith effort to be helpful can infer from that context enough information that clarifies the question enough to remove any vagueness or ambiguity and thus provide a helpful answer. AND THAT'S WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!
And what just fucking galls me to no end... the question was answered (SUCCINTLY, INFORMATIVELY, SIMPLY, AND CORRECTLY!) and even marked as accepted in less than fifteen minutes after being asked.
And that didn't stop some smug fuck from being an asshole and closing the question because "fucking scrub noobfags need to git gud."
https://serverfault.com/questions/...
If MySpace was a place for friends,
then StackExchange is the place for insufferably elitist smug cunts.4 -
> Customer logs Jira ticket claiming app is not working
< I restart the app, investigate and explain tht their server has issues
ø Client closes the ticket as Resolved
-- a couple of days pass by ---
> Customer logs Jira ticket claiming app is not working
< I restart the app, investigate and explain tht their server has issues
ø Client closes the ticket as Resolved
-- a couple of days pass by ---
> Customer logs Jira ticket claiming app is not working
< I restart the app, investigate and explain tht their server has issues
ø Client closes the ticket as Resolved
-- a couple of days pass by ---
<...>
< I log a JIRA ticket explaining what and how is wrong with the server with suggestions how to fix the problem so the app will not crash any longer (client own the server, has his own sysadmins -- I don't even had permissions to open syslog.. had to hack dmesg on their PROD server to pin-point the issue)
> no reaction from customer for weeks. I ping the ticket
× app crashes again
> no reaction from customer for weeks. I ping the ticket
> customer leaves a comment that their sysadmins are looking at it trying to figure out what might be wrong (ignoring what I wrote in ticket's description??? srsly?)
× app crashes again
< I post detail investigation details: snips from logs, screenshots, everything with crystal clear explanations.
> no reaction for weeks
......
well that's fun..6 -
I fucking hate working remote jobs.
Currently in Turkey running absolutely shit internet speeds.
Speed is around 0.31 Mbps down and 3.29 Mbps up, ping is around 141ms according to speedtest.net.
It took about 15 minutes to get a test of the speed working.
Stability is about the same as that of the country.
Please take me back to Denmark and my amazing 150/150 connection.
Only one upside: see attached14 -
!dev
Me *downloading some weird linux distro to test in VirtualBox - I only do this once a month for like 1 hour*
my brother: Oh my god! Are you downloading something again? Moooom he is downloading something non-stop
every day:
my brother *watching some series/YouTube videos/playing ping-sensitive multiplayer games - all the fucking time, everything he does all day is this + eating and sleeping*
me *retrying multiple times to load anything, including devRant* 😒😠9 -
FKING. LANDLORD. FKING LANDLORD THINKS MY LAN CABLE SLOWS THE FKING INTERNET BACK TO THE 1990s.
- Prologue
I'm renting at a place that looks good af. But the fking wifi is so slow, 80% of the time you can't even send an empty http request.
- Chapter 1
Okay, maybe it's my laptop. *plugs in cable*. Now the requests fail 10% of the time. Better than nothing. 2 hours later, gets a text saying other housemates are having slow internet because of me. FUCK. Unplugs, LAN cable, uses mobile data and cries to sleep.
- Chapter 2
Tries again after a few days. Barely uses the internet (I'm only using it to play games, not even download it and I used more than this with a 2mbps internet). No videos, no music, just small data exchange with a low ping. GETS A FKING TEXT AGAIN
- CHAPTER 3
My sis comes over and complains that the net is slow af. Plugs in LAN cable while no one is around, everything is fine. Sis leaves, I roll up my end of the LAN cable in my room but leave the cable plugged in on the outside of the room. Next morning, it's unplugged. Plugged it back in before I go to work and when I come back, guess what? ITS FKING UNPLUGGED. AGAIN. AND IM NOT EVEN USING IT.
SOMEONE PLEASE STOP ME FROM GOING ON A RAMPAGE SHOVING THE FKING CABLE AND THE ROUTER UP PEOPLE'S ASSES. LAN FUCKING CABLES DONT SLOW THE INTERNET BACK TO THE PREVIOUS CENTURY. ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY'RE NOT EVEN PLUGGED IN ON THE OTHER SIDE. FUCK.23 -
Someone on a C++ learning and help discord wanted to know why the following was causing issues.
char * get_some_data() {
char buffer[1000];
init_buffer(&buffer[0]);
return &buffer[0];
}
I told them they were returning a pointer to a stack allocated memory region. They were confused, didn't know what I was talking about.
I pointed them to two pretty decently written and succinct articles, the first about stack vs. heap, and the second describing the theory of ownership and lifetimes. I instructed to give them a read, and to try to understand them as best as possible, and to ping me with any questions. Then I promised to explain their exact issue.
Silence for maybe five minutes. They disregard the articles, post other code saying "maybe it's because of this...". I quickly pointed them back at their original code (the above) and said this is 100% an issue you're facing. "Have you read the articles?"
"Nope" they said, "I just skimmed through them, can you tell me what's wrong with my code?"
Someone else chimed in and said "you need to just use malloc()." In a C++ room, no less.
I said "@OtherGuy please don't blindly instruct people to allocate memory on the heap if they do not understand what the heap is. They need to understand the concepts and the problems before learning how C++ approaches the solution."
I was quickly PM'd by one of the server's mods and told that I was being unhelpful and that I needed to reconsider my tone.
Fuck this industry. I'm getting so sick of it.25 -
#TheCoronaEffect
Before Corona: (Work From Office)
Boss: Let's have a call.
Me: Sure, allow me some time I am assisting the team on a new feature in the app.
Boss: Ok, ping me as you get free.
----------------------------------------------------------
Now: (Work From Home)
Boss: ***Calls for the 15th time in a day...***
Me: (With Bleeding Ears) Yes sir, am here...!
(Having to pick up every single time as he knows you've got nowhere to go 'coz the whole city is in LockDown)
Boss: ***Talks for another 1 hour with screen share***
My Boss is a bigger threat to my health than Corona now!!!
#GoCoronaGo3 -
Dear Recruiters,
If you start your communique by saying anything in the vein of, "we have an immediate need for," I will not be replying to your email, linkedin ping, friend request on Instagram or semaphore frantically waved from the tallest hill in view. You are trying to sell something to me, I am not desperately longing to do something for you. If you don't work for me, you have no capacity to represent my interest.
Regards,
The Talent
----------------
Tldr; developers cede the power in the relationship to recruiters and other middlepersons at their own peril.9 -
At office we sometimes lose our internet connection, the strange part is that it's not fully gone, if you (for example) ping an ip directly, it's fine. But if you try to load any web pages, or do any other kind of internet usage, it won't.
We finally know why...
It's because another company in the same building is uploading some huge thing and using all of the available upload bandwidth (200 mb/s)
So that's nice... Let's put a limiter on that so they DON'T FUCKING KICK US OFFLINE WHEN THEY NEED TO UPLOAD SOME.... WHAT EVER THEY MAKE...3 -
Pm: '[...] So when will you set up the server its urgent'
Me: 'look buddy i applied here as a java dev, ended up doing fronted. Fine, i like js, i can do that. But then dont fucking ping me daily with server stuff what has been overcomplicated and i got no idea about, theres a backend team, ask them.'
Pm: 'you said you would do the frontend'
Me: 'yeah that doesnt contradict a word i said'
Pm: 'you took responsibility, fix it'
Me: '?????? THATS WHAT IM SAYING YOU FUCKFACE COCKSUCKER ASSHOLE THAT I DIDNT AND I WONT, FUCK A HORSE'4 -
Fresh internship story/conversation (Part 1)
Happened today:
- "Can you hack someone via cmd?"-cheap coworker at my internship workplace
- "Can you hack the NSA from any device?"-cheap coworker
- "Can the police identify me, if my face is on a Youtube video?"-cheap coworker
- "I can see all devices I have been through when I want to connect to a target as a route.
*talks about hops in a trace route, but uses non-technical terms for it*
*uses "ping host wikihow.com" instead of "tracert wikihow.com" to demonstrate it, besides of that "host" was not supposed to be there in that command*
*he had to google how to use the ping command on Windows*
*finally uses the ping command properly*
"Here, you can see all the devices our machine has connected to to reach the target"
ME: Aha. But dude... you know that all these ip adresses are in fact the same ip. These IPs are not any different. They are all the same. Besides of that this IP is the IP of this *points to domain name on windows cli* domain.
Him: Oh... I had a friend named ... *continues telling me some "hacker stories" from his past*
Me: *ignores him and always just responds with "Aha" to him* -cheap coworker
Happened yesterday:
- "You have programming classes? You must be an expert in Excel then, right?" -internship boss3 -
TFW someone tells you that you're not a "real frontend developer" and then repeatedly asks for CSS help... 😒3
-
It took me around 10 hours, but I finally got a new feature onto my discord-bot. Best thing about it is, that I can basically transfer it onto every meme format4
-
How to become a hacker😎
1.Go to the store get a black hoodie, wear it and go infront of the PC.
2.Turn on the PC with WINDOWS😂
3.Change cmd font colour to green.
4.Type the following code in cmd.
ping 192.168.1.1 -c 9999999
5.OK now do that in again and again in 2-3 terminals.Now your desktop is full with black and green😋.
5.Take some pics of it and upload stories😍.
6.OK now your a HACKER😎10 -
Attempting to access my colleague's NFS directory on his VM, don't know the VM's IP address, hostname or password:
- 2 minutes with nmap to narrow the possible IPs down to ~30
- Ping each and look for the one with a Dell MAC prefix as the rest of us have been upgraded to Lenovo. Find 2 of these, one for the host and one for the virtual machine.
- Try to SSH to each, the one accepting a connection is the Linux VM
- Attempt login as root with the default password, no dice. Decide it's a lost cause.
- Go to get a cup of tea, walk past his desk.
- PostIt note with his root password 😶
FYI this was all allowed by my manager as he had unpushed critical changes that we needed for the release that day.6 -
Mgmt: We need performance metrics' comparison for those 2 tests ASAP, we'll ping you every 5 minutes
AWS Cloudwatch: *unusually slow - takes ~2 minutes to add/remove a metric or change the timeframe*
Me: *fuck*
AWS Autologout: "Let me just intervene here right before you take that screenshot that took you 1.5 hours to filter out..."1 -
So I'm back from vacation! It's my first day back, and I'm feeling refreshed and chipper, and motivated to get a bunch of things done quickly so I can slack off a bit later. It's a great plan.
First up: I need to finish up tiny thing from my previous ticket -- I had overlooked it in the description before. (I couldn't test this feature [push notifications] locally so I left it to QA to test while I was gone.)
It amounted to changing how we pull a due date out of the DB; some merchants use X, a couple use Y. Instead of hardcoding them, it would use a setting that admins can update on the fly.
Several methods deep, the current due date gets pulled indirectly from another class, so it's non-trivial to update; I start working through it.
But wait, if we're displaying a due date that differs from the date we're actually using internally, that's legit bad. So I investigate if I need to update the internals, too.
After awhile, I start to make lunch. I ask my boss if it's display-only (best case) and... no response. More investigating.
I start to make a late lunch. A wild sickness appears! Rush to bathroom; lose two turns.
I come back and get distracted by more investigating. I start to make an early dinner... and end up making dinner for my monster instead.
Boss responds, tells me it's just for display (yay!) and that we should use <macro resource feature> instead.
I talk to Mr. Product about which macros I should add; he doesn't respond.
I go back to making lunch-turn-dinner for myself; monster comes back and he's still hungry (as he never asks for more), so I make him dinner.
I check Slack again; Mr. Product still hasn't responded. I go back to making dinner.
Most of the way through cooking, I get a notification! Product says he's talking it through with my boss, who will update me on it. Okay fine. I finish making dinner and go eat.
No response from boss; I start looking through my next ticket.
No response from boss. I ping him and ask for an update, and he says "What are you talking about?" Apparently product never talked to bossmang =/ I ask him about the resources, and he says there's no need to create any more as the one I need already exists! Yay!
So my feature went from a large, complex refactor all the way down to a -1+2 diff. That's freaking amazing, and it only took the entire day!
I run the related specs, which take forever, then commit and push.
Push rejected; pull first! Fair, I have been gone for two weeks. I pull, and git complains about my .gitignore and some local changes. fine, whatever. Except I forgot I had my .gitignore ignored (skipped worktree). Finally figure that out, clean up my tree, and merge.
Time to run the specs again! Gems are out of date. Okay, I go run `bundle install` and ... Ruby is no longer installed? Turns out one of the changes was an upgrade to Ruby 2.5.8.
Alright, I run `rvm use ruby-2.5.8` and.... rvm: command not found. What. I inspect the errors from before and... ah! Someone's brain fell out and they installed rbenv instead of the expected rvm on my mac. Fine, time to figure it out. `rbenv which ruby`; error. `rbenv install --list`; skyscraper-long list that contains bloody everything EXCEPT 2.5.8! Literally 2.5 through 2.5.7 and then 2.6.0-dev. asjdfklasdjf
Then I remember before I left people on Slack made a big deal about upgrading Ruby, so I go looking. Dummy me forgot about the search feature for a painful ten minutes. :( Search found the upgrade instructions right away, ofc. I follow them, and... each step takes freaking forever. Meanwhile my children are having a yelling duet in the immediate background, punctuated with screams and banging toys on furniture.
Eventually (seriously like twenty-five minutes later) I make it through the list. I cd into my project directory and... I get an error message and I'm not in the project directory? what. Oh, it's a zsh thing. k, I work around that, and try to run my specs. Fail.
I need to update my gems; k. `bundle install` and... twenty minutes later... all done.
I go to run my specs and... RubyMine reports I'm using 2.5.4 instead of 2.5.8? That can't be right. `ruby --version` reports 2.5.8; `rbenv version` reports 2.5.8? Fuck it, I've fought with this long enough. Restarting fixes everything, right? So I restart. when my mac comes back to life, I try again; same issue. After fighting for another ten minutes, I find a version toggle in RubyMine's settings, and update it to 2.5.8. It indexes for five minutes. ugh.
Also! After the restart, this company-installed surveillance "security" runs and lags my computer to hell. Highest spec MacBook Pro and it takes 2-5 seconds just to switch between desktops!
I run specs again. Hey look! Missing dependency: no execjs. I can't run the specs.
Fuck. This. I'll just push and let the CI run specs for me.
I just don't care anymore. It's now 8pm and I've spent the past 11 hours on a -1+2 diff!
What a great first day back! Everything is just the way I left it.rant just like always eep; 1 character left! first day back from vacation miscommunication is the norm endless problems ruby6 -
Doing linguistic research where I need to parse 2000 files of a total of 36 GB. Since we are using python the first thing I thought was to implement multi threading. Now I changed the total runtime from three days to like one day and a half. But then when I checked the activity monitor I saw only 20 percent of the CPU usage. After a searching process I started to understand how multi threading and multi processing works. Moral of the story: if you want to ping a website till they block you or do easy tasks that will not use up all power of one core, do multi thrading. If you need to do something complicated that can easily consume all the powers of a single CPU core, split up the work and do multi processing. In my case, when I tried to grab information from a website, I did multi thrading since the work is easy and I really wanted to pin the website 16 times simultaneously but only have 4 cores. But when it come to text processing which a single file will take 80 percent of cpu, split it up and do multi processing.
This is just a post for those who are confused with when to use which.12 -
Just because you can learn HTML in a day doesn’t mean that you don’t need a degree.
Did you know that your browser, HTML, CSS, Javascript, and even your operating system use linked lists, binary trees, hash tables, and other so-called “useless” data structures?
It’s important to understand the roots and fundamentals of computer science even if you won’t use that knowledge day to day.
It changes your perspective on programming once you learn what actually goes on under the hood, and makes you think twice about the impact of what you write.
It’s relatively easy to get a programming job without a degree nowadays, but it often leads to web developers claiming that degrees aren’t important to their web apps.
There is much more than just the web to computer science, and that’s something to always keep in mind.11 -
- There are no stupid questions. Please feel free to ask.
- You don't have to memorize, but try to understand.
- Document so you never have to remember.
- Teach so you will master and never forget.
- Even if we have different responsibilities do not ping pong issues because overall the client only sees one company name so we work as one.
- Do not disturb while on vacation leave unless it's life or death.
- Relax, sleep and have a happy weekend. -
I have a Windows machine sitting behind the TV, hooked to two controllers, set up as basically a console for the big TV. It doesn't get a lot of use, and mostly just churns out folding@home work units lately. It's connected by ethernet via a wired connection, and it has a local static IP for the sake of simplicity.
In January, Windows Update started throwing a nonspecific error and failing. After a couple weeks I decided to look up the error, and all the recommendations I found online said to make sure several critical services were running. I did, but it appeared to make no difference.
Yesterday, I finally engaged MS support. Priyank remoted into my machine and attempted all the steps I had already tried. I just let him go, so he could get through his checklist and get to the resolution steps. Well, his checklist began and ended with those steps, and he started rather insistently telling me that I had to reinstall, and that he had to do it for me. I told him no thank you, "I know how to reinstall windows, and I'll do it when I'm ready."
In his investigation though, I did notice that he opened MS Edge and tried to load Bing to search for something. But Edge had no connection. No pages would load. I didn't take any special notice of it at the time though, because of the argument I was having with him about reinstalling. And it was no great loss to me that Edge wasn't working, because that was literally the first time it'd ever been launched on that computer.
We got off the phone and I gave him top marks in the CS survey that was sent, as it appeared there was nothing he could do. It wasn't until a couple hours later that I remembered the connectivity problem. I went back and checked again. Edge couldn't load anything. Firefox, the ping command, Steam, Vivaldi, parsec and RDP all worked fine. The Windows Store couldn't connect either. That was when it occurred to me that its was likely that Windows Update was just unable to reach the internet.
As I have no problem whatsoever with MS services being unable to call home, I began trying to set up an on-demand proxy for use when I want to update, and I noticed that when I fill out the proxy details in Internet Options, or in Windows 10's more windows10-ish UI for a system proxy, the "save" button didn't respond to clicks. So I looked that problem up, and saw that it depends on a service called WinHttpAutoProxySvc, which I found itself depends on something called IP Helper, which led me to the root cause of all my issues: IP Helper now depends on the DHCP Client service, which I have explicitly disabled on non-wifi Windows installs since the '90s.
Just to see, I re-enabled DHCP Client, and boom! Everything came back on. Edge, the MS Store, and Windows Update all worked. So I updated, went through a couple reboots-- because that's the name of the game with windows update --and had a fully updated machine.
It occurred to me then that this is probably how MS sends all its spy data too, and since the things I actually use work just fine, I disabled DHCP Client again. I figure that's easier than navigating an intentionally annoying menu tree of privacy options that changes and resets with every major update.
But holy shit, microsoft! How can you hinge the entire system's OS connectivity on something that not everybody uses?9 -
Customer support people are weird.
They ping "Hi" and just leave it at that!
Wtf do you want me to do with your "Hi".
Is it something urgent I need to look at? Or some generic query?
But I won't fucking know that, unless I reply to your stupid context-less greeting. Because you can't bother to take an extra minute to type. Even worse when it is outside my work hours.
If I do decide to reply I am already online and lost my leverage on deciding whether it's actually urgent or not!
Fuck you Karen from support and fuck you Kumar.
And fuck you junior devs! Don't fucking "Hi. There?" me bitch! Type what you want I'll reply if it's worth it and when I have time to.8 -
You need to answer your manager, but don't have a clue, try these randomly:
I'll circle back to you
I will run the numbers on it
Let's go back to the drawing board
Let's touch base in a bit. Ping me
I don't have the bandwidth right now
It's on my radar
Let's put this on the back-burner
I have too many balls in the air right now
I have a lot on my plate
I'll get back by close of play tomorrow
I'll have to deep dive/drill down into this and get back
I have a hard stop at X hours
Let's park that for now
It's in the pipeline3 -
Some of the penguin's finest insults (Some are by me, some are by others):
Disclaimer: We all make mistakes and I typically don't give people that kind of treatment, but sometimes, when someone is really thick, arrogant or just plain stupid, the aid of the verbal sledgehammer is neccessary.
"Yeah, you do that. And once you fucked it up, you'll go get me a coffee while I fix your shit again."
"Don't add me on Facebook or anything... Because if any of your shitty code is leaked, ever, I want to be able to plausibly deny knowing you instead of doing Seppuku."
"Yep, and that's the point where some dumbass script kiddie will come, see your fuckup and turn your nice little shop into a less nice but probably rather popular porn/phishing/malware source. I'll keep some of it for you if it's good."
"I really love working with professionals. But what the fuck are YOU doing here?"
"I have NO idea what your code intended to do - but that's the first time I saw RCE and SQLi in the same piece of SHIT! Thanks for saving me the hassle."
"If you think XSS is a feature, maybe you should be cleaning our shitter instead of writing our code?"
"Dude, do I look like I have blue hair, overweight and a tumblr account? If you want someone who'd rather lie to your face than insult you, go see HR or the catholics or something."
"The only reason for me NOT to support you getting fired would be if I was getting paid per bug found!"
"Go fdisk yourself!"
"You know, I doubt the one braincell you have can ping localhost and get a response." (That one's inspired by the BOFH).
"I say we move you to the blockchain. I'd volunteer to do the cutting." (A marketing dweeb suggested to move all our (confidential) customer data to the "blockchain").
"Look, I don't say you suck as a developer, but if you were this competent as a gardener, I'd be the first one to give you a hedgetrimmer and some space and just let evolution do its thing."
"Yeah, go fetch me a unicorn while you're chasing pink elephants."
"Can you please get as high as you were when this time estimate come up? I'd love to see you overdose."
"Fuck you all, I'm a creationist from now on. This guy's so dumb, there's literally no explanation how he could evolve. Sorry Darwin."
"You know, just ignore the bloodstain that I'll put on the wall by banging my head against it once you're gone."2 -
So I just got this email from a tech company, I registered to send my CV some years ago , about a dev Job openning.
The descripition included:
Java and Angular ( first red flag )
So I go to their site to check it out ...
No https, ping the domain returns an ip from another continent with 500+ ms latency.
Major flaws on the site usability...
Super dumb password recovery method...
I'm fucking outta here dude. I might send them a proposition to fix their servers and at least put it behind letsencrypt though...
And these morons have big clients, like my bank... wtf...4 -
Me: *builds smol website for blogging purposes*
...
Hmm 🤔 so I need to be able to find a way to display properly to mobile clients as well, the desktop style is shite on my phones... How about going for all-screen and less than 1440px width? I mean there don't exist any phones with over 1440px width and I'm sure that everyone is now using 1920px width on their desktop panels (please keep the portrait desktop monitor setups out for now 😢)... Aight, looks nice now in both desktop and mobile. Awesome!
Few days later...
Le Telegram inbox: *ping*!
User: um yeah your font is way too large
Me: *looks at screenshot* (at least it was an actual screenshot, not a picture) well that's the mobile view.. why are you using that, what's your resolution?
User: 1024x768
*Facepalm.jpg*
Why are you doing this to yourself and why are you doing this to me 😭24 -
I hate when you copy something important to the clipboard, and accidentally copy something else later.6
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I’m having issues with my internet connection and instead of actually solving them I spent few hours writing a script that plots ping values to monitor the connection status, and it might not even be useful. Good job me.
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When your colleague is so impatient that he send 100s of emails for a small issue and you cant block him :|
Email 1
Email 2
Email 3
Dude at least let me read the issue in email
Email 4
Email 5
Dude you could have sent..
Email 6
Email 7
Sent.. me a ping on Slack
Email 8
Email 9
WTF man
Email 10
Email 11
Wait dude I am working
Email 11
Email 12
Working on your issue chillex
Email 13
Email 14
Email 15
Email 16
What the fuck :|
Email 17
Email 18
Email 19
Email 20
ARE YOU SERIOUS?
Email 21
Email 22
Email 23
Email 24
Email 25
WHAT THE FUCK MAN :|
Email 26
Email 27
Email 28
I will kick your ass :|
Email 29
Email 30
Email 31
Email 32
Email 33
I will kill you :||
Email 34
Email 35
Email 36
I will fuck your mother :|||
Email 37
Email 38
Email 39
Email 40
I will drop a nuclear bomb on your Ass
Email 41
Email 42
Email 43
Email 44
.
.
.
.
'Its still coming' :|||¦6 -
When there is no WiFi internet
Me:
1.checking router connection
2. Opening the WiFi admin portal and checking the port and socket.
3. Open CMD and ping www.google.com
My dad: Just un-plug it and plug it again
Me: 😶4 -
Background: Since last 3-4 months, was working with a senior engineer remotely on a project.
Present: Currently, I am Out of Office and yesterday late night, I opened my official mail and after sometime I got an email with subject: GOODBYE!
It was from him. The same senior engineer with whom I was working. I thought it was a joke. But people don't joke when they send such emails to a huge group of people.
I never knew he was going to leave so soon. I wanted to learn so many things working with him. I used to ask him the silliest doubts ever.
I still wonder why he left the company. I have so many questions to ask him.
I am sad. I am feeling left alone.
It's awkward that today, this very moment, I can't ping him anymore forever.
It's obvious to be more professional and such things are normal.
But, I am fresher and my first project was with him. So, it's kind of tough for me too.
I know this will help me to grow up stronger and teach me that time isn't constant and we need to always be ready and use the right time preciously and deal with the "constant change".
And also, wherever he goes, my best wishes to him and I hope I will meet him some day. -
@echo off
color a
echo Hacking...
ping localhost -n 5 >nul
color c
echo Failed, aborting...
ping localhost -n 3 >nul
pause4 -
!rant
So my pm gave me a task and estimated it to 6 days. I was like, well, thats a vacation for me isn't it :). I started it 3 days later and read the description... Get these api into this app..etc..mvp and all... so I worked on the views first. Later I found out that the api were totally incompatible, and no such data was found or COULD BE MADE for the app. that was day 1 :)
I kept publishing apks with empty views, nice empties If I do say so, and just said we have to wait for backend to make tokens and data. Vacation starts, (sorry boss if you're reading this :D)
On day 6, the PMs were just rushing up and down, contacting backend, back to me, then backend, office ping pong, (a lovely sight), til the senior SysAdmin said, its impossible. Of course I knew this, buuuut, who would miss such a lovely opportunity.
PS: to all PMs, keep on dreaming those impossible ideas :) -
Getting a static IP has become a kind of a status symbol, my friends are paying extra bucks to ISPs so during parties they can be like `Hey Yo, Ping me at 27.49.36.16 , it's static!` :/8
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Serious Question/Poll
Imagine a job where instead of a worker, you're a partner. Hold on, I know that sounds markety...
Let's say instead of an employee, you're basically like a free agent. The company has a pool of projects that are approved to develop, and you can pick what project and what team to work on. More than that, you can even choose how much you want to work on it, and get paid accordingly in ownership stake of said project (on top of your base salary)
What if you were encouraged to submit your own ideas about everything, and that feedback is instantly public, before anyone (management) can water it down, take credit, or worse, suppress it entirely.
What if you could work from anywhere, home, not home, middle of the ocean, whatever.
Plus, we give you a budget to buy your own pc/mac whatever. As long as you can code on it, we don't give a shit.
Also, foosball and ping pong, beer, coffee, cool work environment and all that kind of shit too.
Paid training, for even whimsical new technology, in fact, especially so.
Want to do agile, fine, hate it? fine, just find the team and project that does what you want.
What else am I missing?17 -
devRant is awesome, but Disney also manages to light-up my day.
This is how Wall-E became a beloved member of our team, and helped me put a smile on my face throughout a very frustrating project.
It all started in a company, not so far far away from here, where management decided to open up development to a wider audience in the organization. Instead of continuing the good-old ping-pong between Business and IT...
'not meeting my expectations' - 'not stated in project requirements'
'stuff's not working - 'business is constantly misusing'
'why are they so difficult' - 'why don't they know what they really want'
'Ping, pong, plok... (business loses point) ping, pong'
... the company aimed to increase collaboration between the 2 worlds, and make development more agile.
The close collaboration on development projects is a journey of falling and getting back up again. Which can be energy draining, but to be honest there is also a lot of positive exposure to our team now.
The relevant part for this story is that de incentive of business teams throughout these projects was mainly to deliver 'something' that 'worked'. Where our team was also very keen on delivering functionality that is stable, scalable, properly documented etc. etc.
We managed to get the fundamentals in place, but because the whole idea was to be more agile or less strict throughout the process, we could not safeguard all best-practices were adhered to during each phase of a project. The ratio Business/IT was simply out of balance to control everything, and the whole idea was to go for a shorter development lifecycle.
One thing for sure, we went a lot faster from design through development to deployment, high-fives followed and everybody was happy (for some time).
Well almost everybody, because we knew our responsibility would not end after the collection of credits at deployment, but that an ongoing cycle of maintenance would follow. As expected, after the celebrations also complaints, new requirements and support requests on bug fixes were incoming.
Not too enthusiastic about constantly patching these projects, I proposed to halt new development and to initiate a proper cleaning of all these projects. With the image in mind of a small enthusiastic fellow, dedicated to clean a garbage-strewn wasteland for humanity, I deemed "Wall-E" a very suited project name. With Wall-E on board, focus for the next period was on completely restructuring these projects to make sure all could be properly maintained for the future.
I knew I was in for some support, so I fetched some cool wall papers to kick-start each day with a fresh set of Wall-E's on my monitors. Subsequently I created a Project Wall-E status report, included Wall-E in team-meetings and before I knew it Wall-E was the most frequently mentioned member of the team. I could not stop to chuckle when mails started to fly on whether "Wall-E completed project A" or if we could discuss "Wall-E's status next report-out". I am really happy we put in the effort with the whole team to properly deploy all functionality. Not only the project became a success, also the idea of associating frustrating activities with a beloved digital buddy landed well in our company. A colleagues already kickstarted 'project Doraemon', which is triggering a lot of fun content. Hope it may give you some inspiration, or at least motivate you to watch Wall-E!
PS: I have been enjoying the posts, valuable learnings and fun experiences for some time now. Decided to also share a bit from my side, here goes my first rant!2 -
Way after office hours, random ping!!
Client: Hey man you're a ninja, i have heard so much about you from my team, you're really good. Thanks for everything.
Me(Overwhelmed): Gee, this is my job :)
C: So, can you do a small change to the website!! 😨
Me: Okay
2 days later. After office hours!!
C: Hey Ninja... and all that crap...
Me: Starts typing... Goes offline!!
Fuck you!!4 -
Just as I wait for my train, some advertisers from a utility company here approached me. Asking what my company is etc..
Me: "well I'm making my own company..."
*Looks at their pamphlet*
"Oh, utility company you mean. My apartment building has solar panels."
Them: "oh you know about electricity right... And F-16, the fighter jets that fly at 3000km/h"
(My neighbor is a former aerospace technician who mentioned that previously, should be about right)
Them: "they fly faster than electricity!"
Me: "but um.. electricity travels at the speed of light..."
Them: *avoid subject*
Them: "yeah it travels 7 times around the globe in 1 second"
Me: *recalls ping to my servers in Italy*
"Yeah to Italy my ping is about 300ms if memory serves me right... So that'd make sense"
(Turned out to be 40ms.. close enough though, right 🙃)
Them: "don't travel too much at light speed, alright!"
*They pack up and leave*
Meanwhile me, thinking: but guys.. all I wanted to do was smoke a cigarette before my train comes. Why did you waste my time with this? And uninformed time wastage at that.
Advertisers are the worst 😶12 -
Building my own router was a great idea. It solved almost all of my problems.
Almost.
Just recently have I started to build a GL CI pipeline for my project. >100 jobs for each commit - quite a bundle. Naturally, I have used up all my free runners' time after a few commits, so I had to build myself a runner. "My old i7 should do well" - I thought to myself and deployed the GL runner on my local k8s cluster.
And my router is my k8s master.
And this is the ping to my router (via wifi) every time after I push to GL :)
DAMN IT!
P.S. at least I have Noctua all over that PC - I can't hear a sound out of it while all the CPUs are at 100%14 -
Seriously, wtf..
- Getting ready for the K.I.D.
- Will need a red LED light/lantern to see things around w/o waking the kiddo up
- Order a bunch of various models
- Receive some of them
- The another one arrives - it only has white and blueish-white modes
- Reach out to the seller, ask to send me what I've ordered
- Seller replies with:
> Hi, friend
> I am very sorry this light is out of stock now
WTF dude... I order a particular SKU of your products, I need it for its particular properties the other SKUs don't have and when you see you've got no more left you do what? Send me a random product? Seriously, WTF man?!? How about ping me with a message, explain that you've oversold the item and suggest a refund? naaah, too much work, right? Just grab whatever products you still have left on your shelf and send them to your customer instead. /s
WTF MAN?!?!2 -
I once saw a YouTube video when youtube first started of this kid. He was a proud "hacker" and had this short video teaching everyone exactly how to hack Google.
He goes to the the terminal and types "ping http://google.com"
As the server responds, he tells everyone that was exactly how anyone can go and hack Google.
Clearly he was wrong, but he felt like more of a black hat than any of us ever will. -
Look, if I send you an email, don't just immediately ping me via IM to answer. I sent you an email because (a) I was too busy to chat in the first place, and (b) it wasn't a super-critical question requiring an immediate interaction. I was, in fact, trying to do YOU a favor by using a medium that almost by design doesn't dictate an instant reply. You basically defeated the entire purpose of me CHOOSING to send an email in the first place.
Yeah, I know, I should just be happy that you are a helpful person who respects me and so wanted to get to me ASAP rather than one of the dinguses that never answer anything... but I'm a dick too, so I'm not.
Honor the "Importance Code of the Communication Mechanisms", damn it!7 -
Vendor we('re forced to) work with, as we share a client. This is in their stylesheet. Fuck SEO best practices, amirite?! 😒5
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Fucking professors, they think could play ping pong with students. I started my thesis on ransomware but these meaningless biological creatures who is my relator sent me to another one who sent me to another one who sent me to the first professor. After almost three weeks I have nothing done so i switched professor and thesis argument to neural networks (TensorFlow, Theano, Keras, Caffe and other) and now they wants me back and one of them said that he is offended. Fucking retarded, I have to graduate and I'm working hard to do it in september, if you were a little bit interested I could have collect some material to study in august sacrifing even the summer but you mock me, but rightly it's my career and my money, it doesn't care to you. You deserve to get stuck in an infinite loop of pian.4
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Woah. I just realized that I have 875 followers on GitHub. 😍
I know it's not much compared to the legends, but it's a lot for me.
https://github.com/kbrsh11 -
When a ping with less than 10ms eqauls ping porn, shouldn't pinging yourself be considered masturbating?2
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So I installed Avast because I was downloading some torrents.
After months I suddenly hear a really loud "*ping* *ping* *ping* Eine Bedrohung wurde gefunden". I nearly got a heart attack. I thought I've got a fucking maleware shitty fuck thing, but I had no idea how I could find out where the fuck it was coming from. So I ignored it.
Then, weeks later again: "*ping* *ping* *ping* Eine Bedrohung wurde gefunden", while I was browsing the web.
I thought it was coming from a website so I looked through every tab and window. But nothing.
So I googled the exact sentence it said, and voila:
The first result was from the avast support site.
I opened avast and looked into the settings. There! A checkbox to turn it off! These fucking cock suckers enabled it by default!
It was the first time I enjoyed clicking a fucking checkbox. FUCK YOU AVAST!!!
Why is AntiVirus Software so shitty these days... I'll probably just switch to Windows Defender.9 -
It's been three weeks now that „SPRING“ is over and Nerdism won over our interior decorations. Neither wife nor friends and family noticed. But I do. Every morning. This time I made an impact to our decoration. This single time4
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A coworker changed the application deployment process. He told all three of the other developers who need deployments, but not me. We sit six feet away from each other and I've run/managed deployments for a year longer than him.
His new process doesn't work and he's blaming the dev ops team for not following it. The new process clearly doesn't fit their workflow and never could have.
The lack of deployments have caused production issues and he still won't ping dev ops to remind them about the deployment because "it's not in the new workflow".
He's been painting dev ops as incompetent at the last three retrospectives without having ever personally reminded the deployment guy.
Ugggh. -
On today's episode of "Being the Company Git Guy":
"Good Day jallman112, can you ping me when you have a second? I'm having issues with merging our last branch back to MASTER in GIT. It's forcing me to resolve 400+ conflicts"
Sure. I'll get right back to you.
In a second.
Promise.2 -
Two types of people in this world.
Those who read "ping" as a command.
And those who read it as a sound. 😂3 -
1) Submitted my CV
2) Got an email to schedule a phone interview for the next week, I gave ~5 appiointments on the next week that were good for me
3) Next week passed, no answer to my E-mail, I asked in a mail, what happend
4) Got reply, that we should schedule the phone interview for the next week
5) We aggreed, in the appointment, they did not call me
6) I asked in a mail, what has happened
7) We aggreed in a new appointment
8) This time they called me, after a short conversation I was told, that I they send me task as homework right after the phone call and I will have to do it in one week
9) They did not send it
10) Next day I asked, whats going on
11) They sent me the task, and said that I can ask them, if have queations
12) For me it was not clear, if I was allowed to use frameworks for the task, so I asked it
13) I neveg got reply and did not ping for the 4th time
This was the most annoying and ridiculous recruiting process I had to deal with. It was just a waste of time.1 -
Speedtest result for a network used by 20 employees:
14ms ping / 18.14Mbps down / 5.34Mbps up
Speedtest for my mobile phone:
25ms ping / 88.45Mbps down / 14.93Mbps up1 -
I strongly dislike people who don't even try to gather information by themselves before asking others.
Now, I'm sure ALL of you have seen this, when someone has a problem with their code, printer, etc they ask you or someone else before just Googling the answer. Like ffs, you really think that you're so special that you feel like other people should Google stuff for you, like I need you to understand that you're not special, you're not unique and there's a VERY high chance someone has has the exact problem as you.
The most common question I see on Discord as a whole is "who ping" or "why ping" or something related. Ffs Discord had a fucking button that tells you who pinged you (yes I know that the sender can delete the message, but this is rarely the case and I always check before getting mad)
On a somewhat related note, I never understood why people ask "who are you" especially when they have a name tag or whatever (and double especially if it's online) like what do you expect them to say? Do you want their life story?23 -
Oh god... technical decisions should be taken by people who actually know what they are doing and even so still counter-checked and not followed blindly.
I am currently working in a company that wasted millions by trying to implement micro-services where they don't belong and didn't step back when they realize it was a mistake
(protip: micro-services usually don't belong in most places).
Now we're dealing with the sunken costs fallacy and I am seriously believing that the company is going bust in a few months. Let's wait and see. -
Every night around midnight my internet turns to shit, ping jumps to 1000ms ... Lasts for a few hours.
Only tech support available at that time is cheapest call center in Bombay
"Okay please sir I am running the tests now please. Nothing is wrong sir from my end"
"Oh? What's the latency from your end to my modem?"
".... Sir I am runnings the tests..."
Bah! It's whack...5 -
Share your look-busy scripts
I'm talking about some script, or command(s) which output impressive garbage to the screen. For instance, `tree / | od` or `ping google.ca | xxd` might be enough to dazzle an executive, but to really ensnare a fellow dev, you need to get a bit more complex.
So let's see those scripts! From stupid simple, to application-level complex, I wanna see 'em all! :D11 -
Sometimes I have to work with physical hardware. There are over 300 machines in our lab, split among two subnets. But for some reason, I can never access my machines by hostnames.
Every other week, there's an IP conflict on this network, requiring me to log into the active directory server and delete old DNS entries. This usually happens because someone decided to deploy 64 VMs on a huge server, all at once, didn't boot them with a delay, let alone with with a warning to IT.
Then when my superior asks how my progress has been and I respond with "I can't even get the machines to ping each other by hostname, there's something wrong with the DNS:, I get the following response: "HOW COME NOBODY ELSE IS HAVING PROBLEMS WITH THIS. YOU'RE FULL OF SHIT", from someone who spends 90% of the year abroad, working remotely.5 -
Okay, I knew one of my colleagues was actually a work freak, but to this point...
He's been working for most of the day yesterday on a school project, and so was I. Satisfied with my progress, I push the code with TODOs on things we had to agree on tomorrow as well as mentioning it in the issue associated with it on Git, with my last commit a bit before 11PM.
I wake up, with a ping on Discord asking me what was that "bug" I just pushed, wondering what editor I use and asking me if I even use the console debugger. Said "bug" was the point of discussion I said we wanted to talk about tomorrow, I replied in the morning. But he decided of the fix on his own and committed it, as well as other things until... 3AM...
Honestly, I don't blame him for choosing at our stead, he's the leader of our branch and the Gitmaster on top of that. I just reproach him to call it a bug, not see the issue, and all that while he could, you know, sleep. And get some rest overall.
This dude has been working himself madly these last weeks, where he did about 80% of what each of the team member was supposed to do in a whole semester (which amounts to 150 hours of work) for this project (we're nine folks on it).
Now I'm pretty sure it's how he works and that he still gets a decent amount of sleep (like I dunno, until 9AM or so), so I don't expect a response beforehand.
And indeed, as he woke up, he replied to me.
At 7:50AM.8 -
I think they are afraid of me :)
Last time I pushed them harder than anyone ever did since their tools I have to rely on precisely were unstable. Now each time I ping their channel in Slack I get immediate ack responses from their manager and architects .
Nice :) -
I’ve been seeing a lot of developers claiming “JavaScript sucks” because they do stuff like:
10 + window * [“JS sucks lol”] / {a: []}
What do you expect?2 -
Fucking tired of imbeciles
- who can't tell the difference between if a computer is hanged or the Mouse's cell ran out of battery.
- who constantly ping you when outlook isn't working, you fucking idiot you have to send/receive in order to get a reply in inbox.
- who have deliberately blocked .vbs script which takes backup of Outlook .pst files and keep complaining at the end of the day while I'm fucking about to leave.3 -
Finally got the swag! After more than 2 years. Sent a mail for it to @dfox in 2016. You needed 20 upvotes to get the swag then. He sent it, but I never received. A month or so ago, was cleaning up my mailbox and came across the email, and thought would ping him again about it just for the sake of it! I finished college in 2017, got a job and moved to another city. Guess what?! He replied, gave him my updated address and he sent it again!
So thanks a lot @dfox!1 -
When you had 1 hour to work on your project, and spent the first 30 minutes checking out Google doodle, summer sales, top-ping your server, etc. And on devRant.
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This is the real times. This is not that it's happening right now, this is pretty regular. Lesson? Rethink before you decide the variable type4
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Set up my little raspberry pi and installed postgres. Now when it boots I can ping it for about half a minute then it crashes. So I'll install it locally I guess...3
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So we have this really annoying bug in our system that customers keep complaining about. I've explained in detail, multiple times, why the part they think is a bug is not a bug and the workaround they keep asking me to apply doesn't make sense, won't fix the issue, and won't even stick (the system will notice that the record they want me to delete has been removed and it will repopulate itself, by design).
I've told them what we need to do as an actual workaround (change a field on the record) and what we need to do to properly fix the bug (change the default value on the record and give proper controls to change this value through the UI). We've had this conversation at least three times now over a period of several months. There is a user story in the backlog to apply the actual fix, but it just keeps getting deprioritized because these people don't care about bug fixes, only new features, new projects, new new new, shiny shiny new.
Today another developer received yet another report of this bug, and offered the suggested workaround of deleting the record. The nontechnical manager pings everyone to let them know that the correct workaround is to delete the record and to thank the other developer for his amazing detective work. I ping the developer in a private channel to let him know why this workaround doesn't work, and he brushes it off, saying that it's not an issue in this case because nobody will ever try to access the record (which is what would trigger it being regenerated).
A couple hours later, we get a report from support that one of the deleted records has been regenerated, and people are complaining about it.
🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄3 -
Just upgraded my internet service from a WISP, that could only get 1mb down and 1 up on a good day with lots of packet loss, (hack job company no improving infrastructure) ... for reference in live out in woods in northern Michigan.. sooo there arnt many options... DSL, don’t cross the river to me, neither does cable or fiber. Cell signal doesn’t work either as you can see.
So I had to try out satellite... went with viasat... got put on viasat-2 and holy shit first time in 4 years since living here have I been able to stream, and download and upload to my servers without having to take a nap. But the experience of dealing with what I did for 4 years definitely caused me to be more creative in what I do, and how I process data, and transmit data. Definitely an experience that taught me lot and gave me a lot of knowledge.
But now I’m in what I will consider “phase 2” there will be faster internet to come... Ariel fiber is being ran by the power company... but they are min 2 years out.. and Elon’s sats will also be next sooo good times to come..
Yeah yeah I know the ping rate sucks.. but guess what... I don’t play games so I don’t care... and as far as voip or web conferencing goes yeah there’s a slight delay/lag.. but I just tell them.. when you call me or conference with me pretend I’m not on earth.. boom the latency is explained then hahah.1 -
>Discovers a new low level profiling tool that could help us at work with stuck process debugging and gets all hyped
>Installs on test machine, tool doesn't work
>Wonders why. Oh. Needs a kernel module to work, compiled and loaded
>"Well, its my test machine... Guess that's no problem..." but... my hype died down a bit. Kernel module installation just for a new tool that aggregates all other commonly used tools? eh... Maybe it will blow me out of my shoes still
>Installs and loads the module
>Tool works. Turns out its just a htop-like tool, with shortcuts to launch specific other profiling tools like strace/ltrace/lsof/netstat/ss etc...
"Oh... That's boring. Maybe it has all those tools built in at least?"
>Tries to run ltrace - tool exits as ltrace is not installed
Lol
>Installs ltrace and launches tool again. Tries to ltrace a process and
>Nothing. Nothing happens. For seconds... Then kicks me off of SSH
WTF?
>Tries to ping machine... silence
Did... our net go down again? (Having issues due to a storm going over our area these few days)
>Pings google and... gets instant reply
More wtf
>Pings the hypervisor the machine was running on
Works like normal
Oh... Oh no. Please tell me it didn't!
>Logs into the hypervisor UI, checks machine state
Running OK
>Opens machine console aaaaand... Yep. Stacktrace as well as a lot of kernel mumbo-jumbo... It took the machine down to kernel panic.
I never went so quick from "We need this tool deployed everywhere" to "Omg I need to get rid of this crap as soon as possible" lol.
And just for those wondering, it was sysdig.1 -
Have you ever prepared some of those cup noodles in the middle of the night and paired it with some cheap energy drink to get that old "back when I was a teenager and passionate about this shit" feeling back? Maybe get those cardboard McDonald's or some fastfood shit you can afford when you were a student?
Remember those thesis days when you can re-write an entire application in one night and now you have a simple task where you basically just have to copy/paste shit together and your response is "This is dumb, it's gonna take 13 days and 69 minutes. Also, I'm gonna be sick for 78 days, could be COVID, maternity, paternity, hemorrhoids, whatever."
Then you realize that carbs make you sleepy and caffeine has stopped working for your jurassic body since you've reached the ripe old age of 20 and became a MILF. Now you need Anlene or Diabetasol, whatever those things are. You want pomade on your hair while you dream of salmon and brocolli. You need viagra even for your brains, wooh.
Now you say, "Fuck this, it's bed time" at 10PM, woah granny, you forgot about cOdEcAdEmY. Are you ready to settle down to an IBM job and ping IP addresses or something? You gonna retire?2 -
next hacktoberfest: prepare CoC and generated PR descriptions, splash vomit it onto everybody who participated and offers high difficulty merge only rewards - PR and get it merged - if they don't merge it, tag some twitter accounts automatically based on hair color and ping some news outlets via twitter and mail. 🙂1
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Well, being the only one in the house who can really solve computer problems:
We have a home nas in our network for filestorage and since a few weeks, we couldn't acces the device through windows explorer, so today I went on a exploration... First I tried the nas in a seperate different network, and it worked immediatly! oke great, try it in our main network again. And 'ofcours' it's not visible. So I go to the router webpage, and the page of our router just really sucks! So it was quite hard to find out if the NAS was attached or not, ad if so, under which IP. Finally found that, tried to connect to the webpage of the NAS, but got a timeout, ping would timeout too! I thought that that might have someting to do with that the NAS would connect via static IP. So I changed that to a dynamic IP, and I could atleast get to the website. After that I could try all the services and all of them worked perfectly, except for samba... And samba is the only service we actually use, so after that I thought that the device not showing up in network view in explorer had something to do with that the nas wouldn't show me a hostname in the router. So I tried to fix that, after an hour of trying to get the hostname to showup in the router, I just thought that I might try to connect to the nas via the IP. So I found via SO that I could just use //192.168.0.104 and I got into the samba server. So I guess that it was actually working all along 😒. After that I didn't want to bother to work with the hostnames, so I just gave the NAS a fixed IP, made a few shortcuts for my housemates and now it all works again.. For now at least...3 -
So been working with Linux for almost 10 years now, so am not new with this. But yesterday, a friend had difficulties accessing Wikipedia and their sister sites so I tried to help him out, you know, the usual way. Ping, Direct IP, DNS, and proxies/VPN, checking his /etc/hosts, but to no avail. Decided to download TeamViewer and install it so that I can help him out remotely. Went afk for 30min for dinner and when I came back, TeamViewer installation .Deb installer literally uninstalled every single software from my Kubuntu machine, from Spotify and slowly even my file manager and terminal was uninstalled. When it was over, even my grub was uninstalled.
Had anyone faced the same issue before?8 -
Hey devrant!, I'm currently developing a hacker game! herer is a little sneak peak all the graphics are temp will be changed as soon as i get some cash! enjoy!14
-
A week ago I raised an issue claiming I couldn't ping service x and that it was blocked
Today I figure out ping is blocked on firewall level and http requests work fine
Guess that's my big blunder this internship2 -
How to manage updates on production as web agency
1: Update the GitHub private repo with your changes
2: Write an email to the customer sysadmin and ask to sync in staging and later production
3: Wait 2 weeks and do another ping about it
4: The sysadmin later will do that
5: In the meantime there is a security update of your CMS and a lot of plugins to update
6: Try to update from the CMS panel and there are no write permission
7: Cry a lot and write another email to go back to point 2 -
Fuck isps where you have to pay like $50 for a static ip. Im tryna set up a wemos for automating stuff, and the only way to ping from my phone is pinging a vps that has an open socket towards the wemos :/2
-
I'm addicted to world of warships right now😫
Which game you guys plays a lot ?
Used to play cs 1.6 a lot too 😝
Yeah I know 1600 BC Game but it's still really fun😄18 -
```
me@host $ vagrant init bento/centos-7.2
me@host $ vagrant up && vagrant ssh
me@vm $ ping google.com
error: unknow host
```
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME
I FUCKING REINSTALLED BOTH, VIRTUALSHITBOX AND VAGRANTFUCK; THIS IS FROM FUCKING SCRATCH, WHAT THE FUCKING SHITFUCK DO YOU MEAN WITH UNKNOWN HOST???3 -
I've gotten almost 20 emails today from our monitoring service saying it can't ping the server and then one 2 seconds later saying every fine. What the hell guys!!!?3
-
Puts three months of work into this project; cronjob to ping 3 APIs at regular intervals, cleans, massive features extraction, dumps into PostgreSQL db. Got Django on top of that with a small neural net and interesting viz - absolutely gorgeous!
Can’t fuckin wait to showcase that.
Feedback: “is that the right blue? I think you have the old company logo! etc”
Mah.LahF3 -
Till now, my best project is a DOS based ping pong game programmed in C++
It was like 3 hrs of main game followed by many bug fixes and features.
https://youtu.be/2S0F8ZIN3SY have a look at the video.1 -
Worst interview experience was a marathon. 3 interviews in a day.
I asked the recruiter to assemble them like that after I had to remind her I was still employed and could go about having interviews all week. I took a day off and departed.
The first interview was with a company that had moved fro their previous address. Since the recruiter obviously checked that, I got to the right place late and with little mojo left.
The second interview was with a company that explained to me how they actually did not need my expertise.
The third was with a company that had just won Apple's Best of the Year award:
Me: So how is it having received the award?
Him: Nah, it's just another one. You get used to it.
[A little more interview]
[We wrap things up and stand up to leave]
Him: Well, thanks for stopping by and talking to us. And sorry we had to do this at our ping pong table. You know, the CEO and I are always playing. He says he's the best, but I always beat him.
All of that sprinkled with a very energising bellyache I had to take to the toilet every now and then (no idea what I ate the night before).
After the marathon, I told the recruiter the third company seemed the most promising, although I couldn't see myself working with someone that pretentious, to which she replied "I thought you had very similar personalities and you have a lot in common".
WHAT?! I've never said anything like that my whole life and now you're telling me you know me from the three fucking phone calls we had?
From that moment on, I've moved away from recruiters and towards networking.1 -
Always fun to name your computer '-' so that e.g. ping thinks a commandline parameter is missing 🖥️🔫3
-
Problem of the day #2
Your last good ping-pong ball fell down into a narrow metal pipe imbedded in concrete one foot deep.
How can you get it out undamaged, if all the tools you have are your tennis paddle, your shoe-laces, and your plastic water bottle filled with water, which does not fit into the pipe?12 -
Whoever came up with the idea that a chat application should make that god-awful, annoying, high pitched, ping sound, second in annoyance only to a mosquito buzzing in my ear; every time someone sends me a message, is destined for the seventh circle of hell.
Yea I'm looking at you IBM. At least add in a damn mute button for your application. I spent 10 literal minutes searching for a mute notification sounds button in the settings screen, which looks like it was designed in 1990 btw. Found jack.
So thanks to you lovely people, I have to mute my entire laptop and I can't listen to songs on it anymore.2 -
I recently upgraded my computer to a ryzen 1700x and 16gb 3600mhz memory and an asus rog crosshair hero vi board(From an 8350)
My pc ran soo smooth, games even more so
The games ran great, but my personal performance went down.
I didn't understand why. Im probably just losing my edge.
I trained and tried. But still, it felt off.
Today I realized that with my new motherboard, I got a new mac address. And my friend is a bit of a neat freak with that stuff. He has a whole system for ip addresses.
So i told him, I wont have the correct ip address. Then he started laughing and asked my to browse to a certain site www.privateinternetaccess.com
There at the top it said: "you are protected by pia"
Devices without an ip address bound to their mac address, will automatically use the vpn according to his rules.
My ping improved by 10-15ms upon getting my normal ip address back and my game performance is back.3 -
Does somebody know how Android OS tries to determine the internet availability? Do they ping their own servers?8
-
After 8 hours of carefully installing Gentoo in my laptop I ended up with a... Completely unusable OS. Guess I'll try again tomorrow, apparently I didn't set up the kernel with the appropriate drivers.undefined there is no such thing as wasted time and you complain about arch no pain no gain? ping 6.6.6 at least the keyboard lights work2
-
Today, carrying my dinner to a table in our universities cafeteria, I passed by the table of a professor. He had a book on his table titled "Hacking Handbook". It contains chapters on httrack, ping, port scans and the like (I checked that on Amazon).
The professor drank a coffee, then got up to get some food. His table was directly next to the wall separating the food corner from the tables. He stayed away from his computer for two or three minutes. Both table and computer where totally out of his field of vision during that time. His computer was not locked and Outlook was open.
The professor teaches IT security.5 -
I keep phones for two years, or try to anyway. Later this year I will hit that two year mark, and rather than excitement at the idea of getting a new phone, I find myself thinking that there's nothing out there that excites me at all. And also, my current phone is in no way deficient. It doesn't hold a charge like when it was new, but that's totally normal, and as degraded as it may be, it's still not a problem at all.
A powerful phone with a snapdragon and 6 or more GB of memory, that measures under 5" and doesn't have some bullshit OEM skin on it. To my knowledge, it doesn't exist.6 -
I remember learning how to program 5-6 years ago. It was completely broken. All of these “courses” just teach the syntax of a language. They usually don’t even teach how it works or what it’s used for. Knowing the syntax is great and all, but what’s important is learning to apply it to solve problems.
A lot of other basic things are often overlooked as well. For example, introducing a text editor and the command line would have been incredibly valuable.
For a long while I was using online editors and logging the output of functions instead of actually making projects.
I’m glad I kind of created my own way of learning: by making projects. Just hopping into something was the best way to learn from me. If I got stuck, I’d simply look it up. As a result, I was able to actually apply my skills to learn. -
Production goes down because there's a memory leak due to scale.
When you say it in one sentence, it sounds too easy. Being developers we know how it all goes. It starts with an alert ping, then one server instance goes down, then the next. First you start debugging from your code, then the application servers, then the web servers and by that time, you're already on the tips of your toes. Then you realize that the application and application servers have been gradually losing memory over a period of time. If the application is one that don't get re-deployed ever so often, the complexity grows faster. No anomaly / change detection monitor can detect a gradual decrease of memory over a period of months.2 -
PC-Lint is such a useless piece of shit! Tons of warnings with no actual benefit. The obvious motivation behind this crap was to throw as many warnings as this cheap sucker can even generate with no effort to minimise false positives. Typical snakeoil shit, reminds me of ZoneAlarm back then which reported every ping as "attack" just to fool the clueless into buying. Meanwhile, the actual bugs that sophisticated tools can find pass unnoticed through PC-Lint.
-
Me: This story doesn't account for certain edge cases. Who do I talk to?
Scrum master: Talk to the PO.
Me: Ok. Wait, the PO is out today to watch the eclipse.
SM: you can also talk to person2, 3 or 4.
Me: they're all out. I'm going home.
Ping me if they ever decide to get work done. -
"reach out"
"touch base"
"ping an email over"
Just a couple of examples of terms people like recruiters love using that make you cringe so hard you want to throw yourself under the next bus. Very similar to clients who say:
"can we make it pop"
"I showed it to my graphic designer friend and they said it needs more fonts"
"I've made some improvements in Word for you"5 -
Question:
Do you appreciate office amenities enough that it makes you want to stay longer than a normal workday? Ping pong, foosball, megajenga, snacks, alcohol, etc.15 -
I was in the network lab today, trying to wrap my head around basic dynamic routing protocols, but i could not ping the third computer..
30 minutes of frustration later I noticed while debugging the protocol, router 2 was ignoring messages from router 3 because it was not version 2...
RIP -
!rant
One forgets so quickly how a bad internet connection feels like.
God I think I cant bear this 1mbit, 500ms ping shit connection. Feels like 2002 all over again.
Please dear internet gods, send help!!!7 -
I think what's worse than bad coding is bad network connection. Can't load StackOverflow, Network Assets, Run Reports, or pull updated repositories because somebody is hogging up the bandwidth. FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUU
-
More network/hardware than dev but anyway: I use OPNsense as a firewall at home on an embedded system. Had everything set up nicely and appearing to be working fine, quite a lot of things set up (static leases, VLANs with various firewall rules etc. - a fair bit of stuff involved). I noticed my remote system was failing to back up to my local one. Turned out port forwarding wasn't fully working (initial packet got through but nothing else). I noticed this at midnight.
Ran an update to see if that helped - nope. Reboot time then! It made its shutdown noises and I waited 15 minutes before giving up (no noises, no ping response). Took SD card out. Copied a fresh install onto it, thus wiping all settings. Booted up fine, set up my internet connection, all good. Proceeded to configure it. Noticed I couldn't access the internet from my PC, but could from the firewall itself. Rebooted the firewall. It didn't come back up. Argh!
Reinstalled AGAIN. Attached a serial cable and it was complaining about something which sounded like it couldn't read the SD card. Tried another. Nope. Looked online (using phone): known issue to do with boot delays.
Gave up and went to bed at this point (4am).
Next day: Installed it in a VM instead. Still no internet from my PC! Another known issue to do with default gateway not being the PPPoE interface. Got into shell, manually changed the default route. Was then able to update to the latest version which fixes the gateway issue. Rebooted the VM. All good.
Put all my settings back in, this time taking a backup afterward.
Only to discover....
....port forwarding wasn't working properly. Back to square 1.
Poked around with some NAT settings (outbound ones), made no difference, undid those changes and suddenly it started working.
WTF? /waves arms in the air
OPNsense folk were very helpful, producing a new build for me to try within a couple of hours of me asking about the problem.
But days like that, I start to question whether I really enjoy technology as much as I thought I did... -
At this point of my side project I wanted to check out openresty for dynamic proxy creation in nginx.
Happy to check it out I installed centos 7 as guest using new command I just learned virt-builder that would automate vm creation.
Spend 10 hours debugging why I can ping and ssh but cannot get to application port from any network.
Checked iptables, restarted network, reinstalled vm again 3 times with different methods.
Scrolled trough whole internet and it’s mostly outdated problems.
Learned bunch of new commands without new results.
Results were always the same:
No route to host.
Turned out firewalld is fucking thing now.
systemctl firewalld stop helped
Now I know that systemd would kill me at some point for sure.
What I can add at this point ?
Please add more distros, differences, standards and programming languages so world definitely would be better place.
I need a short break now to actually start making shit that I wanted to start at 4-5pm on Saturday.
It’s Sunday 3:30am and time for breakfast.
At least I am happy it started working.2 -
I have just slept for a minimum of 5 hours. It is 7:47 PM atm.
Why?
We have had a damn stressful day today.
We have had a programming test, but it really was rather an exam.
Normally, you get 30 minutes for a test and 45 minutes for an exam.
In this "test" we have had to explain what 'extends' does and name a few advantages of why one should use it.
Check.
Read 3 separate texts and write the program code on paper. It was about 1 super class and 1 sub class with a test class in Java.
Check.
Task 3: Create the UML diagram of the code from above. *internally: From above? He probably means my code since there is no other code there. *Checks time*. I have about 3 minutes left. Fuck my life.*
Draws the boxes. Put the class names in each of them. A private attribute for the super class.
Teacher: Last minute!
Draw the arrow starting starting from the sub class to the super class.
Put my name on each written paper. And mentally done for the day. Couldn't finish the last task. Task 3.
During this "test", I heard the frustrations of my classmates. Seemed like everyone was pretty much pissed.
After a short discussion with the teacher who also happens to be the physics professor of a university nearby.
[If you are reading this, I hope that something bad happens to you]
The next course was about computer systems. Remember my recent rant about DNS, dhcp, ftp, web server and samba on ubuntu?
We have had the task to do the screenshots of the consoles where you proof that you have dhcp activated on win7 machine etc. Seemed ok to me. I would have been done in 10 minutes, if I would be doing this relaxed. Now the teacher tells us to change the domain names to <surnameOfEachStudent>.edu.
I was like: That's fine.
Create a new user for the samba server. Read and write directories. Change the config.
Me: That should be easy.
Create new DNS entries in the configs.
Change the IPv6 address area to 192.168.x.100-200/24 only for the dhcp server.
Change the web server's default page. Write your own text into it.
You will have 1 hour and 30 minutes of time for it.
Dumbo -ANGRY-CLIENT-: Aye. Let us first start screenshotting the default page. Oh, it says that we should access it with the domain name. I don't have that much time. Let us be creative and fake it, legally.
Changes the title element so that it looks like it has been accessed via domain name. Deletes the url and writes the domain name without pressing Enter. Screenshot. Done. Ok, let us move to the next target.
Dhcp: Change lease time. Change IP address area. Subnet mask. Router. DNS. Broadcast. Optional domain name. Save.
Switches to win7.
ipconfig /release
ipconfig /renew
Holy shit it does not work!
After changing the configs on ubuntu for a legit 30 minutes: Maybe I should change the ip of the ubuntu virtual machine itself. *me asking my old self: why did not you do that in the first place, ass hole?!*
Same previous commands on win7 console. Does not work. Hmmm...
Where could be the problem?
Check the IP of the ubuntu server once again. Fml. Ubuntu did not save when I clicked on the save button the first time I have changed it. Click on save button 10 times to make sure it really is saved now lol.
Same old procedure on win7.
Alright. Dhcp works. Screenshot.
Checks time. 40 minutes left.
DNS:It is your turn. Checks bind9 configs. sudo nano db.reverse.edu.
sudo nano db.<mysurname>.edu.
Alright. All set. It should work now.
Ping win7 from ubuntu and vice versa. Works. Ping domain name on windows 7 vm. Does not work.
Oh, I forgot to restart the bind9 server on ubuntu.
sudo service bind stop
" " " start
Check DNS server IP on win7. It looks fine.
It still doesn't work. Fuck it. I have only 20 minutes left. Samba. Let us do this!
10 minutes in. No result. I don't remember why. I already forgot why I have done for it. It was a very stressful day.
Let us try DNS again.
Oh shit. I forgot the resolver!
sudo nano /etc/resolv.conf
The previous edits are gone. Dumb me. It says it in the comments. Why did not I care about it. Fuck it.6 minutes left. Open a yt video real quick. Changes the config file. Saves it. Restarts DNS and dhcp. Closes the terminal and opens a new one. The changes do not affect them until you reopen them. That's why.
Change to win7.
Ping works. How about nsloopup.
Does not work.
Teacher: 2 minutes left!
Fuck it.
Saves the word document with the images in it. Export as pdf. Tries to access the directories of the school samba server. Does not work. It was not my fault tho. Our school server is in general very slow. It feels like they are not maintained and left alone like this in the dust from the 90s.
Friend gets the permission to put his document on a USB and give the USB to the teacher.
Sneaky me: Hey xyz, can you give me your USB real quick?
Him: sure.
Gets bombed with "do you want to format the USB?" pop-ups 10 times. Fml. Skips in a fast way.
Transfers the pdf. Plug it out. Give it back.
After this we have had to give a presentation in politics. I am done.6 -
Class normal people:
Def good day:
"Manager was out, had great lunch, got a. special someone's number, successfully avoided traffic, got in special someone's pants"
Def bad day:
"Stubbed toe this morning, rained all day, broke up w. special someone, sat in traffic for 2 hrs"
Class software dev:
Def good day:
"Wrote lots of working code, little to no bugs, checked in no-probs, ahead od schedule for ship, extra time for ping-pong!"
Def bad day:
"Somone fucked up the latest build, coffee machine's broken, ran out of adderall, manager on everyone's @$$ for a fix, 5 hrs later...no fix, no blames, no coffee, board meeting; fml"1 -
We are currently in home office because of the actual corona situation. Since yesterday we experience internet problems in this region. So I constantly check ping to see how worse it is.
Let's see how long it takes for my girlfriend to rage:
while true; do if (( $(ping -c1 1.1.1.1 | grep "bytes from" | cut -d "=" -f4 | cut -d " " -f1) > 40 ));then espeak "fuck" ;fi;sleep 1;done3 -
I'm kind of surprised people haven't tried using devRant as a job board yet. There's a lot of raw talent here, both seniors, and juniors experimenting with everything.
May as well start. We have ping pong!9 -
I took a break from the chaos of programming and took the time to set some clear goals to realign myself.
It was refreshing, but I’m excited to be back :) -
Favorite memories by far were the foosball, beer, ping pong, and subtitled foreign movies while we waited for code to deploy to test environments.
-
Git push is now followed with a tab of GitHub.audio and waiting to see it show up and ping. I'm lonely.
-
Couldn't figure out for the life of me why axios wouldn't ping to the server. Turns out the CORS policy didn't like this. Two fucking hours, man.
-
I finally managed to get my Wireguard setup to work in both ways! Beforehand I could ping from A to B, but not the other way around.
A network 10.1.0.0/16
B network 10.2.0.0/16
(both actually use multiple /24 subnets, but I reserve a /16 for each site for the sake of simplicity)
Lots of fiddling later this is my configuration:
A interface 10.1.199.1/32
A allowedIPs 10.2.0.0/16
B interface 10.2.199.1/32
B allowed IPs 10.1.0.0/16
ping from 10.1.1.1 to 10.2.1.1 => 172ms
ping from 10.2.1.1 to 10.1.1.1 => 172ms
it works, yay! now to add more sites...2 -
I play some ping pong and talk to other people about it.
Rubber duck is great but thinking human is a little better.3 -
Replayed Prototype 2 today. In about 7-8 hours.
It is about to be 4 am rn. My head is like replaying all the voices of the game + my vision is like if I am high :D
Like if I would have a ping of 999 lol -
Lovely Sunday here, yet Windows decided to Fall a Creator update up in my PC.
3 hours jamming internet of whole house;
1 hour Preparing installation at 100%;
30 minutes spent on turning off new bloatware icons and silently changed settings;
Several dev tools stopped working, gave up;
Tried to play games they all stuttering;
Fall back to League of Lesbians and oh boi 792 almighty ping;
Well done! Microsoft.1 -
The ability to ssh to an Earth terminal.
chown -R sionc /socialmedia/facebook
chown -R sionc /alphabet
I would then have the resources to do way bigger projects. Elon Musk can keep his businesses though. I like Elon Musk.
I'd maybe chown my company too, just for fun.
I'd ping my fiancé everytime she goes in a mood and ignores me for half an hour. She'd have to respond and it would annoy her. :3
userdel could be used on the bad people. >:)
There's probably a whole list of these that I've not even thought of that I'll see people write in the comments. I'm pretty sure this could get dangerous.6 -
>Helping "friend's" final project on Networking for Graduate.
>MPLS related, some heavy stuff going on.
>Client asks this gold question:
"What does PING do?"
...
I feel sorry for your 4 years of study.2 -
Mom: Cool! I need a webshop!
Dad: hah OK, I still make more money then you though.
Little brother: MAKE ME A GAME!
Girlfriend: You only play ping-pong and drink coffee all day! -
Tags are really bad implemented on this website (frontend)rant or is it a comma or is it a space tags don't break no quick feedback; is it a semicolon why commas4
-
I programmed an app I've been working on. It sends ICMP packets out...the message I programmed was "One ping to rule them all".
Oh yes, I am the Ping Master ;D2 -
Estimates.. First, part of the team makes "high-level" estimates which are based on informal, incomplete, still-evolving specs and an unstable back-end. The project people report the estimates to the client and elevate the status of these inaccurate estimates to that of commitments.
Then, before the "sprint", we review our initial estimates *ahum commitments* in greater (technical) detail. Because there are still a lot of unknowns, we tend to estimate more buffer here (back-end is often not ready, always ping-pong between project people and dev-team about unclear specs, more work than originally expected, and often late modifications to the original spec).
When an estimate becomes more than 50% extra time at the "refinement", we are told: "sorry, we gotta do it in less" and when it doesn't work out, we're kindly asked to spend part of our weekend catching up at 100% pay rate (legally it's 150-200%).
FUCK THIS SHIT
*quotes used abundantly because these terms belong to "agile/scrum" terminology but we're only pretending -
When shows openly insult your intelligence....
Like o wow that ping commands really gonna do a lot.6 -
:D
This one is funny for me because my current team lead and I have a really comical dynamic regarding reviews.
I can't say I've ever really had a bad experience but I brought up one stand up about how he had rejected my PR and that he was probably just going to reject the next one. So now it's this joke if I get a PR through in one review (which is usually).
One time he spiked a ping pong ball towards me in a match and I replied, "Hey whoa man, this isn't a code review calm down!". 😂 -
Please format issues and PRs correctly. As an open source maintainer it's already hard enough to respond to all of your demands.
But when you make an issue with the title of "error in app.js" with NO DESCRIPTION, and then think you're entitled to ME FIXING IT?!?
Please know that we do this for (mostly) free, and try to make our lives easier by giving us a detailed description of what is going on.
Thanks. -
Went to gym after 7 months,
I think my kidneys sifted to into my ass cheeks or my ass cheeks engulfed my kidneys, can’t tell which one.
And after coming home at 10:00 pm i see a ping
“Hi hardfault”
Oh my fucking god it’s 10:00 pm can’t it wait till morning?
fml 😫😩😭😖5 -
AHHHHHHHHHHGGGH
I HATE VPN SETUP
- Trying OpenSwan
Installing open swan on a Debian machine.. setting up the config.
Restarting openswan. Syntax error. No syntax error to be found.
Different tutorial.. it starts! Try to connect.. I can’t connect. Look at the logs. No errors.
Tcpdump. My traffic is coming through.. all fine.. try to connect again.. it works! (Nothing changed!)
Try to ping somewhere else.. no connectivity.
Try to ping an IP in the same network.. works fine. So I have connectivity, just no internet.
Spend an hour finding out about traffic directions of which no one seems to know what they really mean.
Boss tells me to stop using openswan because it’s deprecated and replaced by strong swan..
- Strongswan
Reinstall Debian machine, install strongswan. Copy openswan config. Oh, they’re incompatible? Look up strong swan config, and the service starts.
Connect to the VPN.. it works! Again, no internet, just connectivity in the same network. Spend 2h debugging the config, disable firewalls everywhere, find an ancient bug in the Debian package related to my issues.. ok, let’s try compiling from source.. you know what, let’s not. I’ll throw this Debian machine away and try something completely different.
- pfSense
Ok, this looks easy enough! Let’s just click through the initial setup, change some firewall rules, create an L2TP VPN with a simple wizard.
Try to connect to VPN. First, it times out. Maybe a firewall issue? Turn off firewall.. ah, something happens now. I get an error message right after trying to connect to the VPN. Hmm, the port doesn’t even get opened when I enable the firewall.. this implementation seems a bit buggy.. let’s try their OpenVPN module.
Configure OpenVPN. Documentation isn’t that clear.. apparently a client isn’t actually a client but a user is a client.. ok, there’s a hidden checkbox somewhere.
Now where do I download my certificate? Oh, I need a plug-in for that.. ok, interesting. Able to download the certificate, import it, connect and.. YES!!! I can ping! But, I have no DNS..
Apparently, ICMP isn’t getting filtered but all outbound ports are.. yet the firewall is completely disabled. Maybe I need outbound NAT? Oh. There’s no clear documentation on where to configure it. Find some ancient doc, set it up, still no outbound connectivity.
AHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHHG
Then I tried VyOS. I had a great L2TP VPN working in less than 15 mins. Thank you VyOS for actually providing proper docs and proper software.3 -
I have a Server with the IP address
x.x.233.61
For clarification, this is the public IP, it does not start with 192 or 172 or whatever local IP.
When I pinged 8.8.8.8 it said
From x.x.1.1: Destination Net Unreachable
After asking my Hoster what this IP address was, he said it would be the router.
In a traceroute to 8.8.8.8 this IP never appears.
Since these ping problems are now fixed, this IP never appears anywhere. If it really is the Server racks router, is there any way to get that IP in Linux?4 -
To marry a woman means,
to really bind that sockets.
Keep the idle rates low on this one
and ping a lot.2 -
Anyone who's a developer at any open source software? Please ping me I would love to contribute on issues with your guidance.7
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Spend 1 hour learning to configure networking interfaces via command line on an ubuntu VM for home use.
Can't ping anything.
Double check /etc/network/interfaces, restart box, check loopback interface functions, check physical cabling.
Realize that VM is attached to a separate virtual switch.
Virtual switch is tagged for Vlan 2, connected router is a flat topology.
Face palm. -
So, I was working on my code base and wanted to update my remote with the local changes. I issued the git push command but it just remained unresponsive, no error-nothing. (I use bitbucket as remote host). This was strange, even enabling verbose option didn't tell me anything useful apart from usual 'pushing this to that' sort of response. I checked internet connectivity on my system. It's fine. I restarted my network-mananger just in case, tried if ping, telnet and other tools were working. Everything seemed fine.
Well, it turns out for a major portion of the day bitbucket was having issue with ssh connection. Finally I added https remote and was able to push my changes using 'username', 'password' route.
It wasted a good portion of my time today!! -
Fuck this shit. Any socket connection on JIO's fucking network gets dropped after 5 seconds if no data is sent. It's working on any other network. Wtf is going on???
Does anyone have any idea on this?
If someone has jio network please go to https://www.websocket.org/echo.html
And connect and check how long until it gets disconnected. Would be greatful if someone can validate this.
The project I am working on uses websockets extensively and this thing is screwing it up. I have temporarily set websocket ping interval to 3 seconds but what if the f**ckers over at JIO decide to start dropping connections every 1 second?7 -
-Coworkers who know when to listen and when to give advice
-Problems that are difficult to stretch me but not frustrate me
-A language with good documentation or tutorials
-a product that I'm passionate about
-a ping pong table to help me stay awake
-coffee
-a environment that encourages learning new technologies
-good pay -
Sat on a bus heading home next to some guy who clearly hasn’t got knowledge of how to use a pair of fucking headphones and it sat playing a fucking game with the volume on loud, and all I can hear is the same fucking “whoosh, ping” noise fucking over and over again or he’s watching those shitty videos on Facebook
IT’S DOING MY FUCKING HEAD IN!!!!!! GET A PAIR FUCKING HEADPHONES OR MUTE YOUR FUCKING PHONE!!!!! NO-ONE WANTS TO HEAR THAT SHIT!!!!!2 -
Hi everyone,
It has been 6months since I am looking for a dev job.
I know I shouldn't post this on devrant ...
If anyone has any junior dev opportunity please ping me.
I am a tech agnostic and very adaptive.
open to learn new tech
Willing to relocate or work remotely.
Resume: https://instahyre-2.s3-ap-south-1.amazonaws.com/...7 -
Today my ping caught me off-guard once again, but I will stop this madness for all eternity! Writing the ultimate ping tool, so I never have to fear high ping ever again.. well I cannot fix my f*cking internet provider, but my ping tool can warn me, even if it detects only the slightest inconsistency!
But first I have to figure out why my tool doesn't output the ping... -
Start my internship at ‘around 11:00’ today. That’s how it was put by the owner. The company doesn’t have an office so they meet in the home theatre of a mansion twice a week. Across from the indoor basketball court and ping-pong room.
If it’s not a real company, experience still looks good on a resume right?1 -
Me: I want to deploy a simple WCF Service in a Docker container on Windows Server....
Docker Whale: nah bro....
Me: but but but you have been working with Windows for about a year this should be a simple simple task
Docker Whale: here let me your IP address every time so you can't ping locally or guess what I'm going to next. -
SocketIO can't listen to the event 'ping'. Spent unnecessary time on it. Could've been mentioned in the docs. 😑
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To playing "ping pong" with ideas with likeminded people to improve them or to get new ideas, is one of the best feelings.
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People around you (especially non-engineers) coming over just to know whether you saw their instant message ping / email to send them a value of a configuration. Or others who just comes in at the right time - when you just got into your utopian magical zone - "just to say hi and catch up". There goes the rest of my day.
Complement that to the instant messaging application of choice of the organization and it's a no-no for productivity. I find myself being invited to random channels only because they want to mention that I did something. I set myself to Away whenever I'm in the mood, but that still doesn't stop people from pinging and sending me notifications anyway.1 -
Puppet is configured to install custom rpms on only CentOS6. Or so I thought. Received a ping today that CentOS6 rpms are trying to install on Centos7. Wtf?