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So this just happened:
Sarah = best friend (random name)
Sister: Hey, could you help, sarah's phone isn't recognized by her computer anymore.
Me: What phone/pc does she have?
Sister: iPhone/Windows.
Me: Has she checked the drivers?
Sister: *tells to check drivers, feedback:* yes, seems to be fine.
Me: *comes up with 1000 other suggestions*
Sister: *doesn't work every time*
Me: Is there any other information that might be useful in this case?
Sister: Well, she dropped her phone in the water earlier, the phone is hardly responding.
Me: THE WAT? AND YOU DIDN'T THINK THIS WOULD BE WORTH MENTIONING IN THE BEGINNING?!? FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.16 -
*walks to the kitchen at work to get a glass of water*
*walks back and continues debugging an issue*
*starts drinking from the glass*
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
*noticing that I never actually filled the glass*
😐
That "in the zone" moment 😆33 -
Apple has Air
Amazon has Fire
Google has Earth
Microsoft should really create something called Water27 -
Client A: "so we using cloud-based server? is it safe? will raining cause data leak? you know rain water is from cloud? how you guys manage to control it???"
Me: "??????"
20 -
GF: please remember the flowers!
Me: I'll set a reminder.
GF: and don't forget to wrap them in water.
Me: I'll see what I can do about the laws of physics.
GF: ... I swear to god..
Me: yes yes I'll wrap them in water.7 -
I made a ridicously hilarious hack recently. My refrigerator it's broken, it has a huge leak of water, my hack was to let the water flow in a plastic box and make a circuit with two water level sensors, a relay and a PIC16F628A to activate a pump that sucks water away through a tube that I wedged intlside the gasket of the washbasin. This gave me the time to buy a newer and better one.15
-
Mom: what are you doing ?
Me: i'm installing daemons in my computer.
Mother: *sprays me with holy water2 -
When someone tells you they thought their iPhone 6 was water proof because they installed iOS 10. Facepalm 😖👋5
-
My whole interview was like:
"Do you want a beer or water?"
Apparently beer was the right answer, I'm working now since one year at the company6 -
Honestly if the StackOverflow community was set on fire and I had a huge tank of water
People in Africa wouldn't die from thrist anymore.14 -
If you have to program in JavaScript, don't forget to drink water. Excessive crying could dehydrates your body very quickly.3
-
Since no one has mentioned it - Happy birthday, Linux.
And thank you, who goes through fire and water debugging this enormous creature (this could've been worse, right?) -
I've always drunk very less water compared to others. So I decided to install this app that'll remind me to drink water every now and then. Since, healthy body, healthy mind.
Was going through comments when I found this.
Well, I mean he's right in a sense, you know.
13 -
Just tried washing my S8.
Works completely fine with speakers and camera, microphone, etc
During the process, it said that water was detected in the charging port, so I had to wait 10 minutes to charge until the port dries.
Overall, awesome!
P.S. How do they detect water???
24 -
My gitlab order has just arrived and because there’s no news after a month, I decided to contact them and they gave a water bottle, a mug, and a pack of stickers for free22
-
What do you guys do when you get bored at work?
this is what I do:
1. Drink Water
2. Stare at the code
3. Go to Bathroom
4. repeat16 -
When you're so tired that you forget to put coffee in the coffee maker and get a cup of hot water instead.3
-
Having to deal with stupid testers who think your app should be resistant to water and black magic and report a bug if it is not5
-
We aren't allowed to boil water BOIL WATER
"We have to get Climate Neutral until we decided for a plan the kitchen is closed"
FUCK YOU I JUST WANT TO ENJOY MY COFFEE WHICH I CAN'T DRINK IN MY OFFICE ANYMORE BECAUSE OF SAME BULLSHIT
I get it we have to become climate neutral but holy fuck this can't be part of the solution to not use the kitchen anymore....50 -
Day three of trying to get WiFi working. No end in sight. Temperatures are rising, water is scarce; must drink rum for sustenance.23
-
To everyone in hurricane war path...
YOUR WONDERFUL STUBBORN ASSES BETTER LET ME KNOW YOU'RE OK. I'M GOING TO BE WORRIED SICK UNTIL ALL THESE FUCKING WATER TORNADOES ARE DONE.32 -
So the water dispenser in the kitchen does not have sparkling water, which I love. But there's one in the meeting room down the corridor that has sparkling water!
Like any regular employee of course I filed a request with site manager to upgrate the kitchen dispenser... NOT!
I wrote an app that sits in the taskbar when minimized and shows a traffic light with the status of the meeting room availability so I know when it's clear to go fetch me some of that bubbly goodness!
7 -
!rant
> Go down into the kitchen to make some tea for my morning routine
> Prepare some water in the water heater
> Throw a tea bag, a bit of sugar and a spoon in my cup
> Take the cup without the water and leave towards my office
> *10 mins pass*
> Want to take the tea bag out of the cup because the tea should be ready now
> That's the moment I realize that I'm a fucking idiot
I seriously need some days off4 -
Boss: I'm going to push you into the water without a lifejacket, and you have to learn how to swim by yourself.
*Not sure he is trying to be funny or he is out of his mind.3 -
Trying to understand someone else’s undocumented fucked code is as frustrating as taking a shit and the water slashing up at you.4
-
When you visit your mom's and she made coffee
*sip*
What is this? Water? Why can't I feel the tingling of the caffeine fighting my fatigue?
*sip*
This can't be coffee, my vision is still not starting to blur!2 -
There was a dark shadow inside the watertank of the coffee machine. I put new water in and voilà a really fat spider came out.
The coffee the last days was really good....8 -
I was on the beach with my work laptop in my backpack in sleep mode. I lifted the backpack and saw water dripping out. The stupid plastic water bottle had failed. Let's hope that my master thesis is still alive. Pray for the HP.9
-
I'm such an idiot.
Spilled water on my MacBook today. Not that much water, but the cup landed right in the middle of my keyboard.
Worst part is I was gaming with my sister and didn't want to stop. So I wiped it off and shook it out a bit and kept playing. A bit later the screen started flickering and eventually went black.
Finally my brain turned on and I switched it off, shook out some more water, and set it up to dry. Just hoping it's not too late.
At least the drying setup recommended by the internet is pretty hilarious looking.
Now we play the waiting game. They say 72 hours before turning it on again. Seems a bit extreme. Will there still be moisture evaporating 3 days later? Not sure I can wait that long to see if it's toast.
Such an idiot.
14 -
My coffee to water ratio in a cup is starting to be 1/2. I'm worried in the future I will be eating coffee not drink it anymore 😂4
-
An aunt enthusiastically regifted me a Captain Phasma figurine. "It's your favorite Star Trek person, Luke Sky Water!"
Politely accepted.7 -
This morning in the office:
- bumblebee grounded
- diagnosed low fuel level
- refueled bumblebee with sugar water
- system check pass, airworthiness restored
- bumblebee asked tower for take-off
- tower opened flight window
- super-clean take-off
- bumblebee left control area
:-)3 -
Here in Saint Petersburg, Russia, our local governmental utility company that is responsible for providing tap water for the entire city, uses crayfish to monitor the water composition.
There are some crayfishes living at the plant and there are some scientists that constantly monitor the crayfish via optical fiber to measure how they feel. If crayfish feels bad, the water is cut out and the inspection begins. There are operators that are paid to watch for crayfish mood throughout the day.
This system works flawlessly since 2005 and helped prevent several accidents when toxic stuff that can’t be monitored on a large scale ended up in our local river.
I mean coal miners was using canaries and rats for years to detect what detectors just can’t detect good enough.
Our entire tap water system depends on some crayfish and it’s amazing.4 -
//Proof that C++ is godly !
auto water = new Water();
auto wine = reinterpret_cast<Wine>(water);
//Ha ha6 -
I'm attacking all the guys who run arch and think they are heroes. Just a load of noobs following online guides who want a cookie for their cv or water cooler street cred. Just fo.7
-
Password policy for a big water company site in Spain.
Translation: Between 6 and 10 characters (only letters and numbers, no spaces)
In guess they have a VARCHAR(10) password field in their db?!?
2 -
Lemon juice
Water
Vodka
Limoncello
Splash of gin (I used Bombay)
Sugar/replacement to taste
Ice
Tastes like traditional lemonade, but this one is a great remedy for burnout/reality.
Highly recommend!6 -
Sometimes the best thing to do is to rest during a weekend and do an activity away from software.
10 -
Realized our scale gives a reading for body water percentage. I always joke that I’m chronically dehydrated, but.. uh… I should probably work on this.
25 -
Check this!!
Do you know watermelon is 50% water?
The other 50% is melon.
Thanks for reading this, now continue at what you were doing.6 -
I have to actually like what I'm working on to get in the zone, and a nice glass of water;
You can't forget the good 'ol " fuck off, I'm coding " sign though.2 -
Today, the coffee machine gave me only a lump of sugar. Without coffee, without water and without glass. It's going to be a long long day...2
-
Walking on water and developing software from a specification are easy if both are frozen. (Edward V Berard)
-
Apparently yelling at someone "hey you! Yes you! You got water on the brain" is not as funny as I had hoped... Perhaps I should have checked if they were witcher fans before hand...7
-
It was a long flight but he just flapped right along! Good job my guy! Time to relax on the beach and enjoy the water!
2 -
Drinking a lot of water, or going for a swim if I can manage. Taking a shower helps, too. I guess I just really like water.6
-
I've been cooking for 4 hours straight, will be eating for a whole week.
If only freelancing worked like that... -
Whenever I make instant coffee, I apply this formula:
18ml² water + (recommendSpoons*2) + (milk*M³)
Where 'M' stands for the motivation which is a constant of 06 -
Apparently the fire hose in our building wasn't connected to the water main, because the legislation stated the building owner had to install a fire hose, not connect a fire hose to the water main.1
-
Open source amazes me all the time.
My eyes water with the amazement of what people are willing to accomplish and then share! Sharing really is caring.2 -
I went to flwater.com and it is not a website about Florida's water.
It redirects to this change.org petition? It's incredibly strange. NSFW banner btw.
20 -
Hmm getting in the zone huh?
Well a good poop
Mug of hot coffee
2 chocolate biscuits
Big glass of water on standby
Headphones , spotify and my metal mix1 -
A rubber duck plugin for all ide that reminds the programer to drink water ( I usually forget to drink water while coding) and more than a few errors it should pop up automatically1
-
Anyone here knows the fastest way dry wet pants. I just dropped some water all over my pant and it looks like I've peed myself.
DAMN IT11 -
Saying you don't like a distribution because of its desktop GUI or some other changeable config setting is like saying you don't like a house because the water is running.8
-
So... I made a post last month about Portugal burning....
This month... Portugal has the worst drought in 80 years...
It has became so bad that animals are dying of hunger because there isn't anything to feed them, or thrist because there is no water...
Even water dams are empty...
Man... Is this the effect of climate change, or just bad luck?
9 -
I have never been so stressed out when programming, I am at a place with no electricity and no running water I'm here for a week and my laptop has 4 hours of battery life, Every second counts!4
-
Dark IDE theme. Putting my phone away. Cup of coffee together with a bottle of water. My great headphones. Either a raw hardstyle or a euphoric hardstyle megamix. Locking myself in my room.6
-
replaced my coffee with this for the hot days 🥵
- lemon juice
- ice
- water
- sugar
- mint
cheap and tasty 😋
8 -
When you can code amazing things but can't cook to feed yourself or remember to drink enough water in a day.
1 -
On a company event. Supposed to do some water skiing.
I'm no fucking Jesus, I can't walk on water! Leave me alone!
Also, I am NOT interested in seeing my teammates in swimsuits. Yikes!3 -
In other news ... The company that booted me and 5 colleagues in april had a water leak and now the entire sales floor was flooded, resulting in +10.000 euro water damage 🤣 good luck making your Q1 sales targets 🤣
Karma much bitches 😂3 -
Bought cup noodle to save time and hassle. Forgot to turn on the electric kettle. Pour the water into cup without checking temperature. In the end, have to cook with the pot anyway. What the **** am I doing?5
-
Programming is the most relaxing job
100% pay
10% work
40% pretending to work
10% drinking water and coffee
20% discussing with other coders
20% attending meetings15 -
That moment when you drop your phone in a sink full of water and have to hope that rice will fix it since you're too poor for a new one right now.1
-
Headphones, a quiet room, a comfortable chair, something to drink (coffee, red bull, water, tea) and something that is interesting enough to totally focus on.4
-
Project: pool cleaner.
Hey guys. So here's the story I mounted my pool one month ago in a very hot day, but the weather is getting freakyer with each year and this was the first sunny day.
But I fill my pool with water from a well. Chlor takes care of bacteria but the damn algy are a problem.
First part: pump the shit out.
First test: not working properly.
- Reason? Buie keeps the dirt from reaching the motor;
- Hazardous: motor must be always under water
- Main problem. Pump is ment to sink in the bottom and pull water out, so only has one exit, the entry goes directly to the engine.
Workable? Turned a snail into fine dust, needs a hose with a buie that goes directly to the motor.
Just having fun... I would be in the pool if I had cleaned it last week
2 -
Lockdown Day 1 of 21.
Royally fucked up.
Cooking gas ran out.
Drinking water is also over. The nearby water vending machine is also not working.
Hoping the gas shop will have stock at the time they told to come back.
Didn't have lunch, already starving even with whatever snacks that was stocked.14 -
Delete your Facebook
Delete LinkedIn and Gmail too
Stop visiting websites with ads
Stop being friends with anyone with smartphones
Draw your own maps
Draw your own water
Avoid drinking tap water
Avoid going out in public with your face on
Kill your own meat
Kill your gods
- From tweet2 -
Which framework can jump the most?
Java Spring Framework.
Which framework can store hot water?
Python Flask
Which framework is believed to cause extinction of dinosaurs?
Meteor JS
Which script devs like to drink the most?
Coffeescript1 -
I WANT TO STUFF THE MOUTH OF SO MANY STUPID PEOPLE. THEY TALK LIKE THEY CREATED EVERYTHING AND KNOW EVERYTHING AND THAT THEY CAN TURN WATER TO WINE. BUT NO YOU CAN'T EVEN TURN WATER TO PEE YOU DUMB STUPID FUCK.
Here is an animal band which is going to play some soothing jazz, please stand by
🎺🦆🎻🦢🎷🐓🎤🦒🎛️🐅🥁🐕7 -
So ever since I was a kid I've been terrified of being submerged in water. A couple times I've gone up to my friend's dad's lake house, and the most I've done there is like put my foot in the water before I got scared.
But today I was at a coworker's grad party, and they had a pool in the yard, and he convinced me to get in. His words were "get in or I'll throw you in", and that got me right in there. It scared the FUCK out of me, but I did it. After that everyone was splashing water all over me, trying to get my hair wet.
Overall, great time, but I'm still scared of being like fully submerged.2 -
Mom: What are you doing ??
Me: Just fixing up a few bugs I encountered yesterday..
Mom: Good .. That means you are doing nothing .. Go fill up the damn water bottles ..
Me: -_- !4 -
fucked up my hand, spent entire work coding like on a typewriter.
for those who want to know, dropped coffee dripper on my hand, full of hot water. it was a first degree burn thankfully, water wasn't that hot. hurt like hell at first, but it's much better already. by monday I'll be ready to be fully exploited for my work again 👍16 -
The coffee here is so shitty, I have to drink lots of water to get rid of the terrible flavor that remains in my mouth every single time.
On the other hand, I'm very well hydrated.8 -
I drink a lot and of water so I always have two glasses by my bedside -
A full one in case I get thirsty and an empty one in case I don't... -
So, i've noticed something:
- My grandfather drinks nothing but the water.
- My grandmother recently increased her water intake due to meds making her retain water way less
- My dad has been drinking more water in an attempt to be healthier.
- I don't drink the house water without boiling it first, as i'm the only one that thinks it smells and tastes like wet dog smells, aside from with like kool-aid or similar where the taste is masked enough to not be detectable.
Well, what does this matter? I'll tell you:
- My grandfather went from fine aside from minor balance issues to totally mentally fried in 24 hours.
- My grandmother is spacing out while driving and falling more and more.
- My dad went from fine to overwhelmed by basic decisions in a couple months of moving here.
- I've noticed a slight decline in my mental health, but this is probably from issues i've had with my college and general stress.
Correlation ≠ causation, but... it's usually-unfiltered water from a well placed uncomfortably close to a lagoon, and it was never tested for safety before use (despite my protests.)19 -
Please, please, please stop cornering me at the water cooler and asking me about work. This is my break.. I can answer your question in five minutes when I’m back at my desk. Thanks.4
-
So I am a restaurant and want a glass of water... But none of the waiters respond. I finally get someone they say OK n leave...
5 mins pass... I'm thinking how I'm not gonna tip bc bad service...
Then 3 ppl come all with a glass of water...1 -
Just got a new job.
All good, really enjoying it.
Only problem is, the canteen smells of chips and it's making me very hungry... Water for me :/9 -
These two liters of water one should drink per day sound like a lot.
However, four pints go down faster than a hookers panties after she's been paid...8 -
I stopped drinking soda. I talked to a colleague last week. He said artificial sweeteners in general have a higher risk of cancer. So I did my own research and found this to not only be true, but drinking sugared sodas also carries a risk. WTF?! Somebody else pointed out that "everything" causes cancer these days. But I don't want the sugar and I don't want my body producing methanol and then formaldehyde.
This week I am doing coffee and water only. I got some nice fresh bottled water and added some lemon juice to the water. Then I proceeded to drink the water. At first I was WTF is wrong with my water!? Then I realized I had put lemon juice in there.11 -
During one of our visits at Konza City, Machakos county in Kenya, my team and I encountered a big problem accessing to viable water. Most times we enquired for water, we were handed a bottle of bought water. This for a day or few days would be affordable for some, but for a lifetime of a middle income person, it will be way too much expensive. Of ten people we encountered 8 complained of a proper mechanism to access to viable water. This to us was a very demanding problem, that needed to be sorted out immediately. Majority of the people were unable to conduct income generating activities such as farming because of the nature of the kind of water and its scarcity as well.
Such a scenario demands for an immediate way to solve this problem. Various ways have been put into practice to ensure sustainability of water conservation and management. However most of them have been futile on the aspect of sustainability. As part of our research we also considered to check out of the formal mechanisms put in place to ensure proper acquisition of water, and one of them we saw was tree planting, which was not sustainable at all, also some few piped water was being transported very long distances from the destinations, this however did not solve the immediate needs of the people.We found out that the area has a large body mass of salty water which was not viable for them to conduct any constructive activity. This was hint enough to help us find a way to curb this demanding challenge. Presence of salty water was the first step of our solution.
SOLUTION
We came up with an IOT based system to help curb this problem. Our system entails purification of the salty water through electrolysis, the device is places at an area where the body mass of water is located, it drills for a suitable depth and allow the salty water to flow into it. Various sets of tanks and valves are situated next to it, these tanks acts as to contain the salty water temporarily. A high power source is then connected to each tank, this enable the separation of Chlorine ions from Hydrogen Ions by electrolysis through electrolysis, salt is then separated and allowed to flow from the lower chamber of the tanks, allowing clean water to from to the preceding tanks, the preceding tanks contains various chemicals to remove any remaining impurities. The whole entire process is managed by the action of sensors. Water alkalinity, turbidity and ph are monitored and relayed onto a mobile phone, this then follows a predictive analysis of the data history stored then makes up a decision to increase flow of water in the valves or to decrease its flow. This being a hot prone area, we opted to maximize harnessing of power through solar power, this power availability is almost perfect to provide us with at least 440V constant supply to facilitate faster electrolysis of the salty water.
Being a drought prone area, it was key that the outlet water should be cold and comfortable for consumers to use, so we also coupled our output chamber with cooling tanks, these tanks are managed via our mobile application, the information relayed from it in terms of temperature and humidity are sent to it. This information is key in helping us produce water at optimum states, enabling us to fully manage supply and input of the water from the water bodies.
By the use of natural language processing, we are able to automatically control flow and feeing of the valves to and fro using Voice, one could say “The output water is too hot”, and the system would respond by increasing the speed of the fans and making the tanks provide very cold water. Additional to this system, we have prepared short video tutorials and documents enlighting people on how to conserve water and maintain the optimum state of the green economy.
IBM/OPEN SOURCE TECHNOLOGIES
For a start, we have implemented our project using esp8266 microcontrollers, sensors, transducers and low payload containers to demonstrate our project. Previously we have used Google’s firebase cloud platform to ensure realtimeness of data to-and-fro relay to the mobile. This has proven workable for most cases, whether on a small scale or large scale, however we meet challenges such as change in the fingerprint keys that renders our device not workable, we intend to overcome this problem by moving to IBM bluemix platform.
We use C++ Programming language for our microcontrollers and sensor communication, in some cases we use Python programming language to process neuro-networks for our microcontrollers.
Any feedback conserning this project please?
8 -
Still water eventually starts to stink
keep moving. Keep your mind open. Always be the student. And the teacher [borrowed from kung-fu panda, though very valid in this context] -
"I want you to make a font, it needs to be heavy, but not too heavy. Like it should be able to float on water. So, bold enough to get a person's attention but not screaming"
...ok2 -
Only got 2h of sleep instead of my usual 5h. I'm a walking corpse and there are still 7h left until I can go home 😴
Stupid, calming water-flow sounds are going to bring me down4 -
In-person interview follow up from my phone interview last week. I hope I nail it. Stressing though. Gotta eat, drink water, and calm the hell down.1
-
One day, I have debugged some nasty legacy code and all of the sudden I wonder...
If Jesus walked on the water, can he swim on land?7 -
Today I spilt a glass of water onto my palm. As I was shaking the hand of a senior executive. He looked at me in disgust as our hands squelched together.
-
I hate only a handful of things in this world. Including: stepping in water with socks on, when the toilet paper rips, and business people.
-
There's a café right next to the water and I can see boats arriving and leaving in the harbour. This peacefulness, but also that I can hear the mild voices in the background is what does it for me and my focussing. Sometimes I also go there with friends, as it's always nice to have live debugging ducks :D1
-
Last time I had a cup of hot water instead of coffee. This time I have 2 cups of coffee on my table. Can you remind me what's life?
-
When you make fried eggs after you cook them abit put some water on them and then close them with a lid so they will cook evenly with the heat of the evaporating water
He was a python developer.3 -
When you give your self a mini heart attack by knocking over an empty water cup while coding.
I can't count how many times I have done this over the years.2 -
Overheard near the water cooler:
"My religion considers using interpreted languages to be a sin."
Someone here really hates the internet then...2 -
Right now i want to put together a system to automatically water/warm/whatever my chilli peppers, but on the long run i want to embed some microcontrollers into my body.4
-
Not finding answer in Stack Overflow is like searching for beer in fridge and later on knowing that whole city is going through water crisis.
-
Someone may love water if all they know is a pool, or they may hate water if all they know is an ocean.
— a thought on why some take to programming more than others -
I ran out of milk halfway a chocolate milk.
With no options left, I skeptically decided to add some water.
I had half a cup of milk, added 1/4 of water. Y'know, enough to look filled, not enough to ruin it in case it goes wrong.
Microwave it.
No, freaking, difference. Loved it.
I added some more water to see how much it changes, and it's just slightly less thick and 70% milk flavour. Sure it's a change but now I know the limit.
Recommended.8 -
I hate the process of trying to get hydrated when I’ve gone through a period of apparently thinking I’m a cactus.
When I don’t drink water at all, I feel fine. No dry mouth, no symptoms of dehydration.
I *start* trying to hydrate and it’s like my body thinks this is the best time to start giving me all those dehydration symptoms it doesn’t even bother with when I’m not drinking water because it’s just given up on me listening to them.
I drank 64 oz of water yesterday and woke up with my tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth and my throat scratchy.
I know that I need to keep drinking water in large quantities for a period of time for my body to chill the fuck out again, but words can’t describe how tempting it is to just go back to being a cactus.
Hydrating sucks.8 -
Boss says: Why is our email not working get it to work again.
Me: What the fuck? Only because I am the computer guy does not mean I can make wine out of water. -
I went to some hot springs.
One of the tubs read "Medicinal water".
I went in.
Eventually my balls started to burn.
Got out and showered until the sensation went away.
Medicinal water, never again.5 -
What i can do in the airplane...
Read books
Listen to music
Sleep
See outside the window
Make some programs
Drink water
Play card games
Anything else?
Note: the plane i am rodong doesnt have anything interesting in ife, only airshow6 -
These guys. I drink a lot of water (I stopped drinking coffee so I had to replace it with something).
-
Got a cold and accidentally forgot to screw the water bottle then the water went into my computer.
All these good things.7 -
My car overheated and got towed on Monday. Now, I’m constantly searching for water cooling aio for my computer. 🤦♂️2
-
I want to start a rant thread, imagine yourself living in Syria, or south Africa, or a gang run neighbourhood in South America... What would your rant be..
FUCK
the well where we get our water just got shat on by the Town drunk
Now I have to walk 5 km instead of 2.. My kid sister needs water today or she might die...
.. And! Siri just gave me the wrong fucking directions
FUCK apple
(Not real apples, cuz.. I'm hungry)7 -
This is like - drinking a glass of water after every beer, to cut the amount of consumed alcohol by half.
It is pretty much useless...
4 -
Sometimes when I drink water out of a glass bottle I knock the edge of it against my overly sensitive front teeth just to feel something once again.9
-
You ever get that experience when you drink some water and the colors become brighter, the room expands in size and your future suddenly seems simple and straightforward?8
-
!dev
TIL: If you want to use SodaStream the you better RTFM... Fuck, there is water everywhere and I really don't have the time to clean up the mess because there is so much work to be done today...6 -
The mission was to develop an Android application for configure some devices(who goes 4000m under the water) before and after their deployment by Bluetooth.
It was pretty cool! -
We're completely redoing our bathroom. Apparently i accidentally damaged a pipe on the other side of the wall yesterday, and now we've had a water leak! 😁 Should've written tests before I went home yesterday2
-
The new janitor lady keeps throwing away the water bottle on my desk after I leave.
I'm trying to be green here and she's making it quite frustrating... I guess I have to hide it from her.6 -
>first time working for big tech company
>first couple days with no sudo, cant setup environment :(
>however
>first couple days mostly debating new peers on if water is wet
>verynice.jpg9 -
I want to rant about it but I don’t even know what to say.
It’s just sad that people share the most personal things with Facebook and other services as long as it’s not a person who asks for it.
It’s just a machine who knows me better than my parents do.
OPEN YOUR FUCKING EYES.
Who is behind the machine? Humans.
It’s 2019. Soon 2020.
They still don’t get it.
That’s what you should teach those kids. A class “how to protect your privacy”..
Not this Shit: : if I Buy 20 melons that contain 70% water, they loose 1% each mile. You carry them for 15 miles. 5 of those miles are in the sun which makes the water vaporize 5x faster. How much fruit exclusive water is left at the end?
WHO THE FUCK CARES? We have cooling boxes and cars.
Focus on something important please..1 -
Work hard. Seriously. If its your first job, prepare yourself for 1 year in front. Learn programming, repeat, repeat more, fail, gain expertise. Surprise them with everything you do, blow the others out of the water with your knowledge.
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I have already started the process of a side project by desiging the software, the architecture, the 3d model, ordered all the electronics of a pet 'smart' stable for my guinea pigs.
Which would automatically feed them and refill their water tanks silently but for me the point on playing around with dozens of sensors for like different water levels, water quality, hay, temperature, water quality (you get the point) ... Building a nice looking web interface or an App to control everything and get a live feed from different angles ( sounds a bit crazy altogether but it looked like a cool project )
I even started a instructable and had a github repo for sharing the source of the app/web interface and the whole micro service based server
I'm still at it and hopefully will start to build the ***ing wood and acrylic parts in the next month's but currently and for the last month's free time ist my archenemy
Keep you posted if you are interested 😀 -
How many devs does it take to change a water cooler bottle?
Two (I saw them), and one DevOps to unfuck the cooler...
How does this even? There were even instructions with pictures on the wall... This explains so much.
2 -
Fuck you GREEN CHEMISTRY!
Fuck you SULPHURIC ACID
Fuck you NITRIC ACID
Fuck you U.S. PRESIDENTIAL GREEN CHEMISTRY CHALLENGE AWARDS
Fuck you WATER PHASE CYCLE
Fuck you CARBON DIOXIDE
ahhh! finally its over...
shit FUCKING PHYSICS EXAM STILL LEFT !
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh3 -
Why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water? Because if they fell forwards they’d still be in the boat.1
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I don't know if this is a joke or a miracle.
I was pooping myself on a toilet, and beside me was a bucket of water, then there was a mosquito in my palm where I held my phone. after I snap it, I accidentally threw my phone at the bucket of water.
First and foremost. It's not a water-proof phone, so don't expect that I'm rich. I immediately grab it and it's so wet.
After a while, it gets a lot of touch bug and plugged in headset which is full of water in it.
tried to wash it after I'm done pooping. shut the phone and wait until it's all dry.
After that, my phone went to teamwip(bootloader) telling me that the custom OS is missing.
After some coding, I checked my phone and it's all normal now.
Lesson Learned: never shit when you have a phone with you.4 -
In my working floor there is a large bottle of water for waterstation. It usually ran out during the middle of the month. So I curious about the ran out situation, I got the answer from the housekeeper.
"The was not enough budget to allocate water bottle for our floor, we need to share all of them for the whole building. We only received 4 bottles for a half-month."
(It ran out 4 days from the beginning of the month)
...
EEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH2 -
Duck is the common name for numerous species of waterfowl in the family Anatidae. Ducks are generally smaller and shorter-necked than swans and geese, which are members of the same family. Divided among several subfamilies, they are a form taxon; they do not represent a monophyletic group (the group of all descendants of a single common ancestral species), since swans and geese are not considered ducks. Ducks are mostly aquatic birds, and may be found in both fresh water and sea water.
Ducks are sometimes confused with several types of unrelated water birds with similar forms, such as loons or divers, grebes, gallinules and coots.
9 -
The past few days I didn't drink much water. So today I am dehydrated and focus is basically non-existent.
Downed three glasses of water and one sugary drink, still can't understand what's happening around me. Gah!
In the meantime, trying to understand math papers. This is fun! **says while head is spinning and has a slight fever**
I'mma go home and sleep. 🛌10 -
If you don't have an empty can of fizzy water or a half-empty company water bottle next to you, are you really in the zone?3
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Did you hear about the scientist who was lab partners with a pot of boiling water? He had a very esteemed colleague.
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I gained 10kg from eating shitting and writing code.
Time to move on or I will die with head in my keyboard.
I was planning to buy a water rover so I don’t have to get out from home during winter but well I don’t know. The gym is across the road and to get a decent water rover I need to spend 3 years of gym. I can’t decide if gym is better than exercise at home. You have greater accessibility to the training device at home.
What you think ?
Should I buy a water rover or go to gym ?9 -
Grandma got her tub handle stuck.. Now water won't turn off... Have to turn off the entire house's water... FML3
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Well I like to keep my room clean so I don't really have anything on my desk, except WATER, I have like 5 big bottles of water so that I remember to drink, and always have enough
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Hindersi Magronä recipe:
- Butter
- 2-3 Onions, diced
- 300g Potatoes, diced
- 350g Maccheroni or just pasta
- 1 table spoon of dried chicken stock dissolved in water
- 20-30ml of hot water
- 30ml Heavy Cream
- 300g Parmigiano Reggiano
- Diced Bacon
- Coat a pan with butter
- Add onions, bacon and potatoes
- Cook untill onions are lightly golden
- Add the stock and stir
- Add the pasta
- Add enough hot water so its level is ~1-2cm above the pasta
- Cook untill the pasta is "al dente" and let the water evaporate untill ~1cm above the pan
- Add the heavy cream and cheese
- Cook and stir for 2min
Et voilà, Mac N Cheese with extra steps7 -
Why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water? Because if they fell forwards they’d still be in the boat.4
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well fuck me, I think I've a chance of killing my laptop...my personal 1... with water...It's unpluged now and hopefully get better after drying...no smoke, so that's good and the keyboard is supossedly water resistent... but still the linux froze...17
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I am unlucky, because electricity in my area just goes down just before I hit the cltr+s....
I am unlucky, because the last person get the product before is goes out of stock is the person just standing in front my me in queue.....
I am unlucky, because my water tank run out of water not just before I go to bath but in the middle of my bath.....
But Still I think I am lucky because I can loop in one line in python, and the nested loop also.......2 -
I like my desk clean. Just copy, pen, water bottle, some eatables. sorry no toys, arts blha blha..3
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You know it's friday, if the coffee machine is still switched off at 12:52.
I only want my coffee to finish my code and start weekend.
I don't want to fill water tank or rinse and decalcify the machine.1 -
Do you ever sneeze in bed and then a few moments later it starts raining for a split second? I'm starting to think my gf must have a water sprayer or something. It's really weird.7
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If I had one wish it would be that I could have FaceTime on Android do I could throw this iphone into the nearest body of water.4
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advantages of bionic systems:
- energy efficiency
- flexibility
- low friction
- compact size
- water resistance
advantages of mechanical systems:
- precision
- rotation is available
- scalability
- can change parts6 -
At what point for coffee basically become sugar water?
Seems like I'm craving mines like soda these days... But know if I'm getting a caffeine Rush or sugar Rush...2 -
Fiance left the mobile charger plugged inside the car, battery discharged, it's pouring out, the water is up to the rims... my shoes are drenched and i'm late for work2
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Recently I feel like energy drinks have become my body's primary resource.
1.Monster
2.Oxygen
3.Water
4.Food
Please somebody, teach me how to life.1 -
Getting completely wired into interwebs makes me boil the same tea water at least 3 times over again.
Running low on RAM apparently.1 -
iPhone 6S got salt water damage. Turns out its the screen so replaced it. Original touch ID doesn't work so that's gone. Now I'm waiting for front camera, sensor, and speaker to arrive to fix that.7
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I sometimes think there should be a little foldeable table in front of my toilet to put my laptop on, and a water proof water bag to use it in shower... Now I think I might have a problem
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“Crushed” by Cocteau Twins and “Is It Cold In The Water” are the perfect soundtracks to finding 47 accurately cut, assorted, and deeply frozen human fingers at the bottom of your freezer.1
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French wine is for pussies. Real men only drink Californian wine. Californian to French it’s like a syrup to water. Such a big dick energy.
Australian and Hungarian wine is also nice. French is overhyped, the crapple of wine.11 -
Holi for Others - Bright colors, water balloons, lavish gujiyas and melodious songs.
Holi for Programmers - Major BUGS, minor BUGS, lavish BUGS and not-so-melodious BUGS.
Team #tecHindustan wishes everyone a very happy safe and wonderful Holi.
2 -
Coke, water and tea/coffee at the reach of my hand. Two monitors and some noise (tv/netflix or music).
It lasts until I reach something that I don't want to do at the moment (generally CSS) -
Are we actually able to measure if a person drank enough by any means? Like wouldn't it be nice if smart watches actually tell you that you need to drink something to keep you healthy instead of just reminding in set intervals?6
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You can lead a horse to water. You can even tie it down and force water down it's throat, but you can't stop it from vomiting all of the water immediately afterwards.1
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Shred some waves at the local break and drink some salt water in the process! That's my way to get unstuck.
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Take your pony to the next water station. Brush her hair.
Your pony died because it wasn't pretty enough.
AH, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! -
Hey i was making a simple water app for my profile. But i need some vector graphics. I don't have much experience in the designing side, so i was thinking if someone with designing skills would like to collab with me on this. Here are some cartoon vectors that i want :
- https://shutterstock.com/image-vect...
- https://shutterstock.com/image-vect...
- https://shutterstock.com/image-vect...
Note that the app is going to be not for profit, open source app. I can give credits wherever you want but there is no money in this, for either of us6 -
Why is grandma water so delicious? I literally ran to Safeway to snag me some sweet relief. This is what I've become.
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RIP my macbook pro.. got washed up by dear water bottle. 😭😑
Bright side: I can move to linux now, thinking about booting up ubuntu or may be arch linux. 😅😁1 -
when you code a lot:
walking into Mcdonald,
waiter: sir, please give your order
me:
if big_mac < 5 $ bring("big mac")
else bring("water")3 -
I drink enough water to be hydrated, throw on some random rock playlist or System of A Down album & I'm in the mood.
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In case of error, During error solving and decrease the tension:
some take coffee
Some do smoke
Some consume alcohol
Some take beers
I take lot of water and start loud senseless music.
What do you do?5 -
!dev
This is a follow-up to a previous rant: https://devrant.com/rants/1303341
I found out that when I turn on the sink faucet on hot and let that running for a minute, I can shower with decent-ish temperatures again 🤔
... meanwhile even the cold water setting yields hot water because of the temperatures outside. -
And how often do you have such thoughts?
Sometimes I feel too lonely. Even during masturbation. Then I work under running water from the tap. Feeling as if someone else is next to us and we are doing it together. It is especially nice when my sperm and water merge in one stream. It's like we're pushing ourselves to the limit at the same time... -
Azure DevOps Bash script task hangs for no reason. This will be in my dreams tonight.
(That and I spilled water all over my trousers in the office today) -
Left the backplate for aircoolers in Canada, only brought the one for the water cooler I gave away here... So I'm patiently waiting for the replacement to come... 😇
Just kidding, I took the water cooler backplate off, got some twist ties, and strapped the new air cooler on. My computer hasn't caught fire yet. 😎
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