It's a merge conflict

When a traffic light has a merge conflict.

Long rant ahead, but it's worth it.

I used to work with a professor (let's call him Dr. X) and developed a backend + acted as sysadmin for our team's research project. Two semesters ago, they wanted to revamp the front end + do some data visualization, so a girl (let's call her W) joined the team and did all that. We wanted to merge the two sites and host on azure, but due to issues and impeding conferences that require our data to be online, we kept postponing. I graduate this semester and haven't worked with the team for a while, so they have a new guy in charge of the azure server (let's call him H), and yesterday my professor sends me (let's call me M), H and W an email telling us to coordinate to have the merge up on azure in 2-3 days, max. The following convo was what I had with H:

M: Hi, if you just give me access to azure I'll be able to set everything up myself, also I'll need a db set up, and just send me the connection string.
H: Hi, we won't have dbs because that is extra costs involved since we don't have dynamic content. Also I can't give you access, instead push everything on git and set up the site on a test azure server and I will take it from there.
M: There is proprietary data on the site...
H: Oh really? I don't know what's on it.
<and yet he knows we have no dynamic data>
M: Fine, I'll load the data some other way, but I have access to all the data anyway, just talk to Dr. X and you'll see you can give me access. Delete my access after if you want.
H: No, just do what I said: git then upload to test azure account.

Fine, he's a complete tool, but I like Dr. X, so I message W and tell her we have to merge, she tells me that it's not that easy to set it up on github as she's using wordpress. She sends me instructions on what to do, and, lo and behold, there's a db in her solution. Ok, I go back to talking to H:

M: W is using a db. Talk to her so we can figure out whether we need a database or not.
H: We can't use a database because we want to decrease costs.
M: Yes I know that, so talk to her because that probably means she has to re-do some stuff, which might take some time. Also there might be dynamic content in what she's doing.
H: This is your project, you talk to her.
<I'm starting to get mad right now>
M: I don't know what they had her do apart from how it interfaces with what I've done.
H: We still can't have databases.
M: Listen, I don't do wordpress, and I'm not gonna mess with it, you talk to her
H: I won't do any development
<So you won't do any dev, but you won't give me access to do it either?>
M: Man, the bottleneck isn't the merging right now, it's the fact that W needs a db
H: I know, so talk to her
M: THE RESTRICTION TO NOT HAVE DATABASES IS NOT MINE, IT'S YOURS, YOU TALK TO HER. I can't evaluate whether it's a reasonable enough reason or not since I don't know the requirements or what they're willing to spend.
H: It's your project.
M: Then give me fucking access to azure and I'll handle it, you know you'll have to set up wordpress again regardless whether we set it up the first time.
H: Man just do your job.

At this point I lost it. WHAT A FUCKING TOOL. He doesn't wanna do dev work, wants me to go through the trouble of setting up on a test subscription first, and doesn't want to give me access to azure. What's more, he did shit all and doesn't want to anything else. Well fuck you. I googled him, to see if he's anyone important, if he's done anything notable which is why he's being so God damn condescending. MY INTERNSHIP ALONE ECLIPSES HIS ENTIRE CV. Then what the fuck?

There's also this that happened sometime during our talk:

M: You'll have to take to Dr. Y so he'll change the DNS to point to the azure subscription instead of my server.
H: Yea don't worry, too early for that.
M: DNS propagation takes 24 hours...
H: Yea don't worry.

DNS propagation allows the entire web to know that your website is hosted on a different server so it can change where it's pointing to. We have to do this in 2-3 days. Why do work in parallel? Nah let's wait.

I went over his head and talked to the professor directly, and despite wanting to tell him that he was both drunk and high the day he hired that guy, I kept it professional. He hasn't replied yet, but this fucker's pompous attitude is just too much for me alone, so I had to share.

PS: I named his contact as Annoying Prick 4 minutes into our chat. Gonna rename him cz that seems tooooooo soft a name right now.

When you stare into git, git stares back.

It's fucking infinite.

Me 2 years ago:
"uh was it git fetch or git pull?"

Me 1 year ago:
"Look, I printed these 5 git commands on a laptop sticker, this is all I need for my workflow! branch, pull, commit, merge, push! Git is easy!"

Me now:
"Hold my beer, I'll just do git format-patch -k --stdout HEAD..feature -- script.js | git am -3 -k to steal that file from your branch, then git rebase master && git rebase -i HEAD~$(git rev-list --count master..HEAD) to clean up the commit messages, and a git branch --merged | grep -v "\*" | xargs -n 1 git branch -d to clean up the branches, oh lets see how many words you've added with git diff --word-diff=porcelain | grep -e '^+[^+]' | wc -w, hmm maybe I should alias some of this stuff..."

Do you have any git tricks/favorites which you use so often that you've aliased them?

Merge conflict in git

Git merge :)

Git add .
Git commit -m 'stuff'
Git push
Error: merge conflict in 594 files

Git commit suicide

Just reached 100+!!

Anyhow. I started coding prettymuch 365 days ago. My mate decided to launch his company and figured it was a good idea to start it with good friends who knew fuck all at coding.

Fyi, the dude can code 15 hours straight everyday for about a year (no shit thats what i saw).

Since he taught me html css javascript(even if i still suck abit at js). He made me remake the whole bootstrap in react by adding this new lib styled-components and test everything(95% coverage :)).

He also taught me webpack and rollup. Json schma forms，http requests redux， redux logic， and all the routing shit...he obliged me to i plement RR4 on release and is now making me overlook the merge requests of my other collegue (yes he made me a git pro，almost).

And now i have to work long distance by studying java， spring， oauth2 and start working on our api.

O yeah，and i went from microsoft to full on linux!!!

To be honest i thought i was gonna die this year. (Also have a kid on the way :)).

Devrant has been like going to the psychologist :) everytime shit hit the fan i realized every one has the same problems :)

Thanks to the community i can also now even give out nerd jokes :)

(L)Devrant

Git merge...

When you merge 8 pull requests and everything worked without any conflict.

Thank you dear mr. boss for fucking up our master branch by adding local changes to a 2 months outdated master branch (250 FUCKING COMMITS BEHIND), pull the remote and then just push without resolving any conflicts!!!1!!!

But thank you so much for sending me an email at 10pm asking me to resolve the conflicts.

It is 3 in the morning and it took 1 hour to get it clean.

Sometimes I want to break some necks...

Git merge <3

!rant
!!git

Who here uses `master` for development?

My boss (api guy) tried to convince me that was normal practice. I gently told him that it sounded crazy and very very bad.

Here's the dev path I'm enforcing on my repos:

(feature branches) -> dev -> qa* -> master -> production*

*: the build server auto-pulls from these branches, and pushes any passing builds to staging/production.

Everyone works on their own feature branches, and when they're happy with their work, they merge it into `dev`. `dev`, therefore, is for feature integration testing. After everything is working well on `dev`, it gets merged into `qa` for the testers to fawn over and beat with sticks. Anything that passes QA gets merged into `master`, where it sits until we're ready to release it. When that time comes (it's usually right away, but not always), `master` gets merged into `production`.

This way, `master` is always stable and contains the newest code, so it's perfect for forking/etc. Is this standard practice, or should I be doing something different?

Also, api guy encourages something he calls "running a racetrack" -- each dev has their own branch (their initials) and they push to that throughout the day. everyone else pulls from it regularly and pushes to their own branch. When anyone's happy with their code, they push from their (updated) branch to `qa` (I insisted on `dev` instead.)

Supposedly this drastically reduces the number of merge conflicts when pushing to an upstream branch due to having a more recent ancestor node?

I don't quite follow that, but it seems to me that merging/pushing throughout the day would just make them happen sooner? idk.

What are your thoughts?

I wish we could branch out our lives like in git. Just fork at critical decision points, try out both/ multiple outcomes simultaneously, then reconcile and merge back into master.

Me after a large Git merge, after expecting masses of merge conflicts and getting none. Life is good my friend.

During yesterday's Demo.

PM: It's a bug.
Client: It's a feature.

Reality: It's merge conflict.

:/

The superpower to perform version control on reality. (Git)

Imagine this universe (the current branch), which is made up of a series of events (commits).

Having this ability to allows us to:

- undo events (git reset/git revert)
- reorder events (git rebase)
- transfer to another universe (git checkout)
- derive a new universe from current universe (git checkout -b)
- delete a universe (git branch -D)
- apply an event from another universe (git cherry-pick)

and my favorite:
- merge universes and their events (git merge)

we have to resolve conflicting events, of course.

What else? ;)

A group of wolves is called a pack.

A group of crows is called a murder.

A group of developers is called a merge conflict. :|

Coworker: You've merged the wrong PR. It is broken.
Me: is it marked as broken? Is there a mail marking it as broken?
Coworker: yes. I wrote something in the chat.

Me: 🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕

I do NOT read and click every brain fart from the chat. I had the PR (as reviewer and dependent developer) open on my desk and waited for the coworker to fix his merge conflicts.

OK then, try to revert. Git reset hard. Push -f. Policy does not allow master modification. 🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕

Fuck this company. Fuck the policies. Fuck them all with a chainsaw. Forced me to work 2 weeks more. 17.04 should have been my last day at this circus. Let 3 other guys go to vacation while I have fix their management's mistakes. Fuck. You. All. Eat shit and suffocate in piss.

Git Pull Failed, Merge Conflict.

Me:
don't do it
don't do it
don't do it
don't do it
don't do it
don't do it
don't do it

Me:
Delete local project folder and pull the project down again.

Fell like I can finally vent this now I've calmed down.

Me: You've fucked the tree again
Junior: No I haven't
Me: It says there "Fixing merge conflicts"
Junior: Well it wasn't me I wouldn't have done a merge
Me: It has your name next to it...
Junior: Well that commit wasn't there a second ago
Me: it's dated for Friday...
Junior: Well if you hadn't committed to master and blah blah blah
Me: We'll if you knew know to use git we wouldn't have this problem.

Jack and Jill
Pulled down from git
To fetch aPaleOfWater.c
Jack made some changes
And then pushed them all up
A merge conflict occurred
Jill decided his changes sucked
And push --force over his
Jack was enraged
For history was changed
And force pushed Jill
down a hill

Force Push Pitfalls😏

friend: so how are we gonna do this project together? download, edit then upload to google drive again. thats the fastest way.

me: how about git?

friend: what?

me: ill just create a repository and create branches before we merge it with master. no need to go through that process of downloading and uploading multiple times

friend: not sure... what... that.. is.....

me: oh we have a looooong way to go, ill guess ill have to teach u git right from the beginning

What happens when two developers get married?
They merge

This was my day at work today
-Be me at work
-Use git terminal on WORK PROVIDED MacBook
-Decide to clone into a repo into another repo as it was one project inside another project
-Makes changes to code
-Attempts to add .
- warning: adding embedded git repo ...
-Apparently needs submodules
-Shit doesn't get added
-During this get asked to create 2 new branches and modify some code
-Do that specifying files to add as add . breaks everything
-Has 3 branches now detached from master
-Super confused where anything is and what's going on
-Go back to branch for other repo to get added to
-Spends 30 minutes trying to understand submodules
-Gives up and deletes folder moving it elsewhere
-Commits begin failing everywhere. Super confused.
-Get everything figured out and commiting
-Goto merge all branches to master
-Merge conflict with .DS_Store
-FML

I think I'm done guys

git merge

My git merges are like my social life.

Lots of conflicts and it just doesn't go well

Successfully resolved my first merge conflict WITHOUT destroying the whole project.
#eleventh-time-lucky

Resolving merge conflicts feels like defusing a bomb.

Took only 10-20 mins to resolve merge conflict

I "Git Pushed" my friend to "git commit" with a girl he likes for long time

But now my other friend wants to "git rebase" on top of her ....WTF

Now need to resolve this merge conflict 😂😂😂

git commit at 5.50 pm
The winner doesn't have to worry about merge conflicts

What your file looks like when it has merge conflicts:

Teamate: Hey I'll checkout you're branch to see what you've got done today.
Me: ...Ok.
Few hours later Teammate forgets to change branch and overwrites all my code in my branch causing merge hell and creating hours of more work.
Me:...what in the f***?!

First base in dev dating!

That moment when u created a project and quite some folks forked it and continued their own versions, but then you realised that you've made a little mistake back then so now your dumb code propagated across humanity.

¯\_( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)_/¯

git pull
git push
git pull
git push
git merge XY
git release vNewBaby

I'm a computer sciences student, so I had to work on a group project at the end of the year. This project had a very big impact on our ratings, and many students were working really hard on it
One evening, a friend of mine knocked at my door to seek for help, she was too depressed to keep working on the project and needed to talk a little bit
After a little talk, we worked on her part of the project together. We managed to finish it just in time and send it to her teammate (they were not using git, our school never ever talked about it so they did not know what it is)

The next day was the d-day, every group had to show the teachers their projects
I arrived in a room where everyone was trying to fix the remaining bugs before their turn
And I saw my friend, almost crying. Her mate changed everything in the code we worked on and everything broke. There was not enough time to merge it again, they were stuck with a non functionnal soft
Obviously, he kept telling everybody it was her fault

Just go to hell, you fucker
I can't even understand how you did have such a stupid idea, now she needs to repeat her year because of you
Fuck you and don't ever come in my sight again, you selfish brat
Just because you know you will pass does not give you the right to fuck with another person's ratings

Best : learning git

Worst : couldn't solve merge conflicts in git

What keeps me up at night?
Unresolved merge conflicts.

TFW your client's git policies are so draconian that the dev teams use "develop" as trunk, and completely ignore the release process.

I wrote up 50 pages of git standards, documentation and procedure for a client. Bad indian director 9000 decides the admin (also Indian) who specializes in Clearcase and has no git or development experience is more qualified to decide and let's him set the policy.

FF to today:

- documentation, mostly contradictory, is copy pasted from the atlassian wiki
- source tree is the standard
- no force pushing of any branches, including work branches
- no ff-merge
- no rebasing allowed
- no ssh, because he couldn't figure it out...errr it's "insecure"
- all repos have random abbreviated names that are unintelligible
- gitflow, but with pull requests and no trust
- only project managers can delete a branch
- long lived feature branches
- only projects managers can conduct code reviews
- hotfixes must be based off develop
- hotfixes must go in the normal release cycle
- releases involve creating a ticket to have an admin create a release branch from your branch, creating a second ticket to stage the PR, a third ticket to review the PR (because only admins can approve release PRs), and a fourth ticket to merge it in
- rollbacks require director signoff
- at the end of each project the repo must be handed to the admin on a burned CD for "archiving"

And so no one actually uses the official release process, and just does releases out of dev. If you're wondering if IBM sucks, the answer is more than you can possibly imagine.

Let the student use their own laptops. Even buy them one instead of having computers on site that no one uses for coding but only for some multiple choice tests and to browse Facebook.

Teach them 10 finger typing. (Don't be too strict and allow for personal preferences.)

Teach them text navigation and editing shortcuts. They should be able to scroll per page, jump to the beginning or end of the line or jump word by word. (I am not talking vi bindings or emacs magic.) And no, key repeat is an antifeature.

Teach them VCS before their first group assignment. Let's be honest, VCS means git nowadays. Yet teach them git != GitHub.

Teach git through the command line. They are allowed to use a gui once they aren't afraid to resolve a merge conflict or to rebase their feature branch against master. Just committing and pushing is not enough.

Teach them test-driven development ASAP. You can even give them assignments with a codebase of failing tests and their job is to make them pass in the beginning. Later require them to write tests themselves.

Don't teach the language, teach concepts. (No, if else and for loops aren't concepts you god-damn amateur! That's just syntax!)

When teaching object oriented programming, I'd smack you if do inane examples with vehicles, cars, bikes and a Mercedes Benz. Or animal, cat and dog for that matter. (I came from a self-taught imperative background. Those examples obfuscate more than they help.) Also, inheritance is overrated in oop teachings.

Functional programming concepts should be taught earlier as its concepts of avoiding side effects and pure functions can benefit even oop code bases. (Also great way to introduce testing, as pure functions take certain inputs and produce one output.)

Focus on one language in the beginning, it need not be Java, but don't confuse students with Java, Python and Ruby in their first year. (Bonus point if the language supports both oop and functional programming.)

And for the love of gawd: let them have a strictly typed language. Why would you teach with JavaScript!?

Use industry standards. Notepad, atom and eclipse might be open source and free; yet JetBrains community editions still best them.

For grades, don't your dare demand for them to write code on paper. (Pseudocode is fine.)

Don't let your students play compiler in their heads. It's not their job to know exactly what exception will be thrown by your contrived example. That's the compilers job to complain about. Rather teach them how to find solutions to these errors.

Teach them advanced google searches.

Teach them how to write a issue for a library on GitHub and similar sites.

Teach them how to ask a good stackoverflow question :>

Merge Man!

The power to git merge without conflicts.

Story time:

At a precious employer.
Hire shit-hot contractor.
No technical test at interview stage because he’s so shit-hot.
Is a uni lecturer.
PhD in mathematics.

Me: Shit, this guy must be good!

6 months later and a tragedy of errors and clearly misspent company funds later:

Manager: can you look at what x did and merge it into the product?

Me: Sure. *looks* *yells fuck very loudly*

*walks over to manager*

“Soooo... you know those 6 months and thousands and thousands you spent? It’s all for nought. There’s barely anything there, and none of it works.”

Manager: “Shit. What are we going to do? Can you fix it?”

Me: “To be honest, it would be quicker to just do it from scratch than try to work out what he’s done and failed to do.”

Manager: “Fuck. Ok. Go for it.”

I then had to build this entire new lot of systems, a workflow system, a user management and permissions system.

I got it done inside a month or so.

For context, we (the devs) knew something was afoot when the contractor couldn’t work out why his keyboard wasn’t working (it wasn’t plugged in), and he also *really* struggled to find his way around visual studio and git.

The moral of this tale? *always always* screen your candidates. Even if they seem amazing on paper.

I had to explain what version control was to the dinosaur last week. (Our cto, for more context check last post)

So we've been having issues getting our infrastructure dude to do deployment because he is sick of the treatment he gets here and has basically checked out.

Deployments then fell onto the dinosaur. After struggling for an eternity to figure out app settings (any junior dev could figure this out) he finally deployed, however it was from qa branch.

I gently reminded him that we were deploying from master and that all changes in qa should be merged to master when testing phase is over.

He informed me that 'he doesn't think that's a good idea because if we merge to master and there's problems then it's fucked forever and there is nothing we can do'

I stood there with my mouth hanging ajar until I finally managed to squeeze out 'that's literally what git is for....' 🤡

seriously, I know git is not the most user friendly, but really....

I attend to a course in my high school, like, it offers you a technical and a high school diploma in the end of tree years of course, anyway

last year I had this project. I had 4 other people working with me. I suggested we use git as there would be many people working in the project and git would help us manage all the files and get everything together in the end.

they didn't even bother to try learning it, I was like "fuck it, let's go without it", no one did anything till the last 2 weeks. then I was all stressed out getting the code together, manually, and the deadline was close.

In the end I wasn't able to put the chat this guy have made, he got mad and I was like "motherfucker, it would be one damn command `git merge` and your fucking chat would be in the final project"

oh it was great to get this out 😎😀
don't even know if I'm making sense xD

First I wanna say how grateful I am that devRant exists, because my friends either don’t understand this vocab or don’t care lol.

Last week I worked on a pretty large ticket, opened a PR with 54 file changes. Just to follow standards I set the PR milestone to a future release version, but the truth is I didn’t care which version this work ended up in— I just needed it to go into the develop branch asap.

Since it was a large PR there was some expected discussion that prolonged its merging, but in the meantime I started a second branch that depended on some of the work from this branch. I set the new branch’s upstream to develop, fully expecting my PR to merge into develop, since that’s what I set the PR base to.

I completed all the work I could in the new branch, and got two colleagues to approve the initial PR so it would be merged into develop, I could add the finishing touch and get this work done seamlessly before the week was over. They approved, it got merged, I pulled develop, and… my work wasn’t there. I went to look at my PR and someone had changed the base branch to a release branch. It was my boss, who thought he was helping. (Our bosses don’t actually work on the same team as us, so he didn’t know. it’s weird. We have leads that keep track of our work instead.)

I messaged him and told him I really needed this in develop, knowing our release branch won’t be in develop for probably another week. I was very annoyed but didn’t wanna make him feel too bad so I said I’d just merge the release branch into my new branch. So many conflicts I couldn’t see straight. His response was “yeah and you’ll probably have a bunch of package manager conflicts too because that’s in that release.” He was right— I have so many package manager conflicts that I can’t even see how many compiler conflicts there are. I considered cherry picking my changes, but the whole reason I set develop as my upstream was to avoid having any conflicts since I’m working in the same functions, and this would create more.

So I could spend the next (?) days making educated guesses on possibly a thousand conflict resolutions, or I can revert my release branch merge and quietly step back and wait for the release branch to be merged into develop.

I’m sure cherry picking is the best option here but I’m genuinely too annoyed lol, and fortunately my team does not care to notice if I step back and work on something else to kill time until it’s fixed automatically. But I’m still in dire need of a rant because my entire plan was ruined by a well-meaning person who messed with my PR without asking, so here is that rant and I thank you for your time.

git merge

*git push*

"There are 27 unresolved merge conflicts"

"Server deployment is automated from git, so dont merge things into the master branch without permission"
Oh ok
>i create new branch
>push unfinished code because i gotta hurry
>server breaks
Well golly gee seems like you did a shit job at automating

Greetings from Denmark! Thought I would join after a lot of lurking, and tell a little story, as to how I fucked up when I started in my company.

I've been there around 10 days and had never used git besides just add, commit, and push. I was told to work in feature branches, and I did, I was playing around trying to learn, and got some merge conflicts, made a lot of unnecessary commits etc. I was told to clean it up before I merged into dev. And as I didn't know git I asked how I could do that. I was told I could force push in my branch, and that it was okay as long as it was only inside my branch. I tried that and saw my command line force pushing to all branches including dev, and master. My heart skipped a couple of beats, and I went directly to my Lead developer and asked what happend. He got a bit mad at me for pushing in dev and master, and override all the commits there had been made. I tried to explain I didn't he did not really believe me, I was so nervous. Luckily everything came back to normal with people's local branches being pushed etc. But that day I learned about git's push matching config, and my lead was luckily only mad in the heat of the moment and even apologized for getting mad. Just one of my little fuck up's in my short time as a developer

You know something has gone wrong when <<<<HEAD appears in the repo

Working with the french person in the office and git gets me every time.

shit push, shit merge, shit rebase

Goddamn accent!

```
Your branch is behind 'origin/master' by 562 commits, and can be fast-forwarded.
(use "git pull" to update your local branch)
```

`$ git pull`

```
251 files changed, 103274 insertions(+), 1361 deletions(-)
```
okay fuck.

So I'm back from vacation! It's my first day back, and I'm feeling refreshed and chipper, and motivated to get a bunch of things done quickly so I can slack off a bit later. It's a great plan.

First up: I need to finish up tiny thing from my previous ticket -- I had overlooked it in the description before. (I couldn't test this feature [push notifications] locally so I left it to QA to test while I was gone.)

It amounted to changing how we pull a due date out of the DB; some merchants use X, a couple use Y. Instead of hardcoding them, it would use a setting that admins can update on the fly.

Several methods deep, the current due date gets pulled indirectly from another class, so it's non-trivial to update; I start working through it.

But wait, if we're displaying a due date that differs from the date we're actually using internally, that's legit bad. So I investigate if I need to update the internals, too.

After awhile, I start to make lunch. I ask my boss if it's display-only (best case) and... no response. More investigating.

I start to make a late lunch. A wild sickness appears! Rush to bathroom; lose two turns.

I come back and get distracted by more investigating. I start to make an early dinner... and end up making dinner for my monster instead.

Boss responds, tells me it's just for display (yay!) and that we should use <macro resource feature> instead.

I talk to Mr. Product about which macros I should add; he doesn't respond.

I go back to making lunch-turn-dinner for myself; monster comes back and he's still hungry (as he never asks for more), so I make him dinner.

I check Slack again; Mr. Product still hasn't responded. I go back to making dinner.

Most of the way through cooking, I get a notification! Product says he's talking it through with my boss, who will update me on it. Okay fine. I finish making dinner and go eat.

No response from boss; I start looking through my next ticket.

No response from boss. I ping him and ask for an update, and he says "What are you talking about?" Apparently product never talked to bossmang =/ I ask him about the resources, and he says there's no need to create any more as the one I need already exists! Yay!

So my feature went from a large, complex refactor all the way down to a -1+2 diff. That's freaking amazing, and it only took the entire day!

I run the related specs, which take forever, then commit and push.

Push rejected; pull first! Fair, I have been gone for two weeks. I pull, and git complains about my .gitignore and some local changes. fine, whatever. Except I forgot I had my .gitignore ignored (skipped worktree). Finally figure that out, clean up my tree, and merge.

Time to run the specs again! Gems are out of date. Okay, I go run `bundle install` and ... Ruby is no longer installed? Turns out one of the changes was an upgrade to Ruby 2.5.8.

Alright, I run `rvm use ruby-2.5.8` and.... rvm: command not found. What. I inspect the errors from before and... ah! Someone's brain fell out and they installed rbenv instead of the expected rvm on my mac. Fine, time to figure it out. `rbenv which ruby`; error. `rbenv install --list`; skyscraper-long list that contains bloody everything EXCEPT 2.5.8! Literally 2.5 through 2.5.7 and then 2.6.0-dev. asjdfklasdjf

Then I remember before I left people on Slack made a big deal about upgrading Ruby, so I go looking. Dummy me forgot about the search feature for a painful ten minutes. :( Search found the upgrade instructions right away, ofc. I follow them, and... each step takes freaking forever. Meanwhile my children are having a yelling duet in the immediate background, punctuated with screams and banging toys on furniture.

Eventually (seriously like twenty-five minutes later) I make it through the list. I cd into my project directory and... I get an error message and I'm not in the project directory? what. Oh, it's a zsh thing. k, I work around that, and try to run my specs. Fail.

I need to update my gems; k. `bundle install` and... twenty minutes later... all done.

I go to run my specs and... RubyMine reports I'm using 2.5.4 instead of 2.5.8? That can't be right. `ruby --version` reports 2.5.8; `rbenv version` reports 2.5.8? Fuck it, I've fought with this long enough. Restarting fixes everything, right? So I restart. when my mac comes back to life, I try again; same issue. After fighting for another ten minutes, I find a version toggle in RubyMine's settings, and update it to 2.5.8. It indexes for five minutes. ugh.

Also! After the restart, this company-installed surveillance "security" runs and lags my computer to hell. Highest spec MacBook Pro and it takes 2-5 seconds just to switch between desktops!

I run specs again. Hey look! Missing dependency: no execjs. I can't run the specs.

Fuck. This. I'll just push and let the CI run specs for me.

I just don't care anymore. It's now 8pm and I've spent the past 11 hours on a -1+2 diff!

What a great first day back! Everything is just the way I left it.

the shortest horror story:
git merge

git merge conflict
😁😁😁

It is time. I have to admit it.

I don't understand Git.

I just memorized some basic commands: git commit, git push, git push -u origin master, git clone, git checkout [-B], git merge. That's it, that's the full list. I use them like they're some kind of magic spells that do what I need. Everything else, those intricacies like rebasing, resetting, HEAD and all that shit, is beyond me.

I'm not a real programmer. Real programmers know Git.

Today I was talking about merge conflicts with a group of devs. One of them asked if any of us had ever rushed to merge a PR before another dev could merge their PR, knowing there were going to be conflicts. Some were more ashamed to admit it than others, but in the end everyone was guilty of doing it at least once :)

Anyone ever do that to avoid being the one who has to resolve a conflict?

Ready to finally deploy and... merge conflict :/

Story of WTF happened to my job

During my employment in (name censored) was stressful, They claimed I didn't complete my task on time which they constantly remove me from git and documentation(which have to follow their style of returning data), I kept emailing, slack, WhatsApp calls them, mostly and predictably got ghosted and blocked.

So How the fuck am I supposed to push my code or code without the documentation (I can actually, prevent refactoring every time, following the documentation is the good way to go.)

On the sprint review, they will complain about me not committing and pushing the code. (I did commit locally, but can't push, they removed me from the fucking repo) and not done.

Tried reasoning, telling the obvious reasons with them, doesn't work. They come out the second reason of me "NOT COMMUNICATING". Sometimes I can get to git merge from dev to my branch and get tonnes of fucked up code. I reviewed the code, and I can't tolerate it.

Lately, I overheard them mocking and cheering me about to get fired over a zoom meeting (I was in there, they forgot to remove me). Their conversation is about me being a coloniser, a jerk, betraying Chinese ancestors for being not Chinese enough.

I was like: "Why the fuck does their conversation sound like they are tucked in the Qin dynasty?"

Frequently I got labelled as unprofessional.

How is cussing about my ancestors, personal and life a professional behaviour?

I had a nightmare once about git commits and merge conflicts.

Am I the only person that deletes their github repo and then uploads it again when you encounter a merge conflict?

Merge conflicts in git I guess 😄

Wow there are conflicts, please git merge first

Me and my friend (let's call him Tom) have done tons of projects before and got some decent knowledge, but we got a dude (Bob) working with us on that final project of Uni and he doesn't know what Git is nor what frameworks are so we chose CodeIgniter ONLY to make it easy for him.

2 month after starting the project and getting like half of the work done (mainly me and Tom) Bob 'kind of' learned PHP, CodeIgniter and Git so he wanted to contribute because the project manager will review all the commits done weekly.

So Bob did some HTML (what now?) and wanted to push it on the repo and even using Gitkraken as opposed to the Git CLI he managed to merge two f*** branches, and when he doesn't mess up the repo he totally ignores the files' structure of the project and makes his own thing.

Worst thing is, when Tom tries (I gave up a long time ago) to teach him something or to give him advice he's all like "Oh okay" "Yeah" "Got it!" but he doesn't understand anything and he won't admit it ! It's like talking to a wall...

Those pesky merge conflicts

How the hell does PR containing production secrets and private keys gets 3 approvals and gets merged upstream? 😬 🥴

Happiness is :

$ git pull
Auto-merging foo.bar
Merge made by the 'recursive' strategy.
$ _

When you're working on the same project and git branch with another intern and he decides to make copies of the files and rename them to avoid having to merge his code with yours. ._.

Unresolvable merge conflicts

(New account because my main account is not anonymous)
Let's rant!

I'm 3 exams away from my CS degree, I've chosen to do some internship instead of another exam, thinking was a great idea.

Now I'm in this company, where I've never met anyone because of pandemic. A little overview:
- No git, we exchange files on whatsapp (spicy versioning)
- Ideas are foggy, so they ask for change even if I met their requirements, because from a day to another they change
- My thesis supervisor is not in the IT field, he understands nothing

The first (and only) task they gave me, was a web page to make request to their server, fetch data etc.
Two months passed trying to met their requests, there were a lot of dynamic content changin on the page, so I asked if I could use some rendering framework to make the code less shitty, no answers.
I continued doing shitty code in plain JS.

Another intern guy graduated, I've to mantain his code. This guy once asked me "Why have you created 8 js modules to accomplish the web page job?", I just answered saying that was my way of work, since we're on the same level in the company I didn't felt to explain things like usability, maintainability etc. it's like I've a bit of imposter syndrome, so I've never 100% sure that my knowledge is correct.
Now we came at the point where I've got his code to mantain, and guess what:
900 lines of JS module that does everything from rendering to fetching data..

I do my tasks on his code, then a bug arises so the "managers" ask him what's happened (why don't you ask to me that I'm mantaing is code!?!?), he fixes the bug nonetheless he finished his intership. So we had two copies of the same work, one with my job done and still with his bug, and another one without my work and without the bug.
I ask how to merge, and they send me the lines changed (the numeration was changed on my file ofc, remember: no git...)

Now we arrive today, after a month that they haven't assigned any task to me and they say:
"Ok, now let's re-do everything with this spicy fancy stunning frontend framework".
A very "indie" Framework that now I've to study to "translate" my work. A thing that could be avoided when I've asked for a framework, 2/3 MONTHS AGO.

We're no strangers to code
You know the conventions and so do I
A full commit is what I'm thinking of
You wouldn't get this from any other dev

I just want to tell you about my problem
Gotta make you solve it for me

Never gonna git you up, never pull you down
Never gonna rant around and rebase you
Never gonna merge your branch, never gonna say $#@*!!
Never gonna risk a cry and build you

!rant

Conversation between [C]oworker and... some kind of customer-side [P]roject manager.

P: Hey, our release 2.0 is ready, but somehow I can't add tag to master. Could you try, please?
C: Yeah, sure.... Done... We are missing tag for 1.2 still, should we add it?
P: Oh, right, I forgot about that.
C: Ok, found merge... Done.
P: *displaying repo in GitBlit* Uh, now the order is wrong. And date is the same. Can we do something about that?
Me: We can just push that tag with replaced date. *just guessing*
P&C: You can do that??
Me: Sure
Me.thinking: Thats git... I would be suprised if we could not.
Me: *pushing tag* Check it now.
P: Whoa, nice!

I experienced merge conflicts for the first time.

I. Hate. Them.

Got my first merge conflict today 🎉 (haven't worked much with git)

So yay.. I guess 🤔

Treat yourself to an early weekend

Name of the branches in a git repository are like

dev
dev-branch
dev-hotfix
dev-test
dev-merge
dev-app
dev-com
dev-com
dev-ref
dev-staging
dev-username1
dev-username2
dev-username3
.
.
.
.
.
.
Master

Boss: some consultants worked on this feature extending some legacy code
Boss: it's 90% done
Boss: they used FTP. It uses iframes and we fired them when they couldn't get the frontend modules working in sync with the backend.
Me: git checkout -b herewegoagain
git diff-tree --no-commit-id --name-only -r 666w3wl4d
*copy output list of files to sublime text 3; select all lines; add to each:
gitk --follow [filename] > src/.notes/herewegoagain/[filename].diff
*examines....
Me: It's -10% done. you'll know I'm almost done when I enter the fugue state. You'll find me at this address. Give me this USB stick and a 4 pack of redbull and I'll do the merge.

When you pull from master and have to do a three way merge

I recently started my professional journey as a developer and I stumbled upon a very strange git repo configuration..

Background: The projects consist on a web app and a lot of backend services in C# (1 service on each project).

The project manager decided to configure the the git repo as a single repo with all of the different projects for the services and the project of the webapp. All in one. Everytime you update something the merge results absurd and this happened…

You lousy fucking test class of an ass wipe,

TLDR; it fails and it passes all at the same time.

So during a deployment, one of the pre-deployment test classes fails, not something anyone has worked on so figured I run it manually to see what’s going on, but no the shit of a thing passed second time around.

Now because we can’t deploy without 100% of the test classes passing so I have to organise another deployment which it fails again. Fuck this,

Unprotects master

Git checkout master
Git merge dev
Git push master -f

Protects master

Skrew this!

Well would you look at that, it works now 😰

Don't you love when your team fights about who will merge their branch to dev first?

Happy Merging 😳

Fucking first rant here:

So we tried to teach Two new colleagues to typescript and git and testing and stuff and we have a SPOC “which claimed to be very technical”. The SPOC’s task is to keep an eye on the work, and today we have had a review...

After two weeks, the created multiple branches into our git, all with one commit of 400 LOC changed, no merge requestet, issue in Redmine set to “closed”.
Well, by the way they were supposed to write Unit tests for our app.
But I thought, ok, we’ll check their branches.

Their tests all passed (cz) but man, the app didn’t and on compilation there were errors, the app is broken. Damn.

Is it really so far off, that even of They wrote tests, that the app should still work?
AND I THOUGHT IT IS COMMON SENSE. Damn!
Guess how needs to fix it

$ git add .
$ git commit -m "This HAS to be online soon"
$ git push
*merge conflict*
*did not look at difference*
*using mine*
$ git commit -m "resolv merge conflict"
$ git push

$ ssh root@x.x.x.x
# git pull
# cd /path/to/webapp
# npm run production

Don't know if this was posted, but that's not stopping me...this is from awhile back before I discovered devRant

In case of emergency:

1. git commit
2. git push
3. Leave building

> Failed to push some refs. To prevent you from losing history, non-fast-forward updates were rejected. Merge remote changes before pushing again.

🤦

Please tell me something wrong with me, and whole world is working like that! It can't be right! Or could it, and I'm just one sad fuck who don't know shit?

So... We've got:
1. Jira reporting (agile style with cards and shit)
2. Task timers (via application integrated to Jira in order to count how much time we spent on a task)
3. End of the day email reporting with description of what we have done today (Jira is not enough?)
4. Daily morning meetings with a team leader to report what we're gonna do today
5. Git merge code reviews for each finished component (that lasts for hours)
6. Weekly status meetings
7. Working hours reporting with a fucking fingerprint

And on top of all of that, the developer is the one who just writes the code - team leader decides how this code is gonna look, what will be written first and what last, what libraries will be used and so on...

When you change 200 lines of code all over the place in a class and then realize that you forgot to pull 17 commits from origin 😖

The company I work at sends their developers out to other companies to help them work on projects and help them in other ways (advice when communicating to customers of on demand software for example).

While not on a project you are working in house training trainees and interns. Part of that is teaching them to show initiative and treating them as full developers. The 30 interns all discussed a git flow and code format.
During the third sprint (two weeks sprints) a team messaged me if I wanted to check their merge request for the sprint.

It took me a glance at the first file to know they didnt do any review themselves. I used my flywheel to check all their changes and without being able to read the code I saw indentation was all over the place, inconsistent bracket placements etc. I let them know I wouldnt check their code until it was according to their own standards.
Two days later I got the message to check it again. At first glance the indentation was fine so I started reading the code. Every single thing was hardcoded, not made to support mobile (or any resolution other than 1920×1080).
A week later they improved it and still not good. Gave them a few pointers like I would for any colleague and off they went to fix things. The code became worse and indentation was all over the place.

I told them the next time it shouldnt be a quick glance to be able to reject it again. By this time other teams came to me asking why it wasnt merged yet and I explained it to them. One of the teams couldnt do anything u til this was merged so I told them to implement it themselves. I was surprised that 4 teams came to me asking about a merge request, that was every team except the team whose pull request it was.

4 weeks after the intitial sprint the other team made a merge request and I had three small comments and then an hour later it was merged.

The other team messaged me why their merge request did went through (still havent seen any of their team in person, Im sitting 10 meters away from them behind a wall)
They also said that it was easier for them because they started from scratch. Thats when I called them in to discuss it all and if they were not interns but full time developers they would have been fired. I told them communication is key and that if you dont understand something you come in person to ask about it. They all knew I like teaching and have the patience to explain a single thing ten times, but the initiative should be theirs.

One of the team members is my current coworker and he learned his lesson by that. The others stopped with their study and started doing something completely else.

TL;DR
Merge request is open for 4 weeks, in the end another team started from scratch and finished it within a week. The original team didnt ask me questions or come to me in person, where other teams did.

DISCLAIMER: some of you might find it harsh, but in our experience it works the best for teaching and we know when people don't dare to ask questions and we help them in that too. It's all about the soft skills at our company.

My day:

9 am: crack knuckles, ready to start day

9:01 am: oh, that PR I sent last week hasn't been reviewed yet and I need it in mainline. Better merge latest and get someone to look over it.

9:02 am: now the test suite is broken, better fix that up before getting it reviewed.

1 pm: phew, that was a slog. Now to get on with today actual programming

1:01 pm: "hey buddy, you coming to that tech leads strategy meeting?"

5 pm: Jesus what a meeting. Now maybe I can get a little code written. I'll just fast-forward to latest...

5:01 pm: WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERES A BAD MIGRATION AND EVERYONE SHOULD AVOID USING THE LATEST VERSION WHY DIDN'T YOU REVERT THAT SHIT DO I NEED TO COME OVER THERE AND RESTRICT YOUR STUPID WINDPIPE UNTIL YOU UNDERSTAND GIT *RAGE TABLEFLIP*

I wish my classmates didn’t know that I’m good at programming.

Recently, more and more often I am being reached out to by my classmates (and especially by one individual) about the problems they’re having issues with. For example yesterday, a guy fucked up his Git commit and made a bunch of merge conflicts, so I helped him fix this, which then lead to WinForms having multiple declarations of same objects.

And I really don’t wanna be rude, and I always try to help, for the love of god - stop bothering me every 5 minutes while I code, or at 10 PM while I wanna chill out.

Most of the things they have problems with can be solved by 2 minute Googling and I strongly believe that at the university level, you should be able to find solutions for your problems yourself - especially when you’re a programmer.

When unicorn goes down during git-merge conference!

Dear God please if you help me fix this merge conflict, I'll be a better person.....please

......please 😭

I just noticed visualizing git is like a timeline with alternate realities and a lot of time travel. The main branch is the main timeline and the branches are like fixes from the past to try and make the future better they merge when the future is fixed otherwise if someone or something fucked up time traveling it becomes the main timeline.

I panic like I'm fucking drowning when going through git merge conflicts via command line

Friend1 (being lewd): I'll merge you in to my git repository
Me: When you try to merge but she has her special days of the month it's called a merge conflict
Friend2: It's not a merge without a little blood

How to delete 16 days of commits 101 🤯:

First of all, me and my class (computer science in college) were working on a project for around 12 weeks, our “client” is one of our teacher and we literally just finished today to work on the project since our degree terminal projects are starting next week.

So now there's this guy in our class who kinda has the reputation to be stuborn and clumsy; he’s going to do his assigned task, commit, push it and put his task into QA (which is just peer evaluation and testing nothing really complex) and then when we try his functionality and finds out it isn’t working, we tell him and the only thing he always answers is : “but it works on my machine” and then we will need to explicitly ask him to be sure he has all the latest changes (database and codebase) and to see if it still works on his side since it doesn’t work for anyone else.

This actually happened quite a lot in these 12 weeks and you can definitely imagine that of course it would definitely not happen again today when we thought we were finally done with this project…

So another teacher gave us an assignment to create a development environment for our big project so we could try out Docker instead of virtual machines, he made GitHub Classroom repos with a minified version of our project and up to this point everything is fine and clear. That is until 3 hours ago, that our little clumsy friend somehow pushed his Docker related files on the main project, maybe he was trying his Docker setup on the real project no big deal you know EXCEPT IF HE HADN’T NOT PULLED SINCE 16 DAYS 😤.

He was doing maintenance on another project so I can maybe understand but gosh how did he not see the big warning of Git that he wasn’t up to date with master ? And yes we only have a master branch bear with us but hopefully we were able to create a new branch with the up to date project and then merge master.

A couple of us had a gut feeling that this guy would do something that would break the whole project right before we ended, turns out we were right 😅

Doing a project with someone and find out that they don't know how to use GIT. He copied the file he worked on, put it somewhere else (using the Github uploader) and wanted me to merge it with the original.

*coding at 1AM*

Result: wrote a whole feature in what was supposed to be a git merge 😅

But hey it turned out to be very well documented 😜

I know I posted this earlier, here's the meme image to go with it!

Git pre-commit check means that only team lead can merge to master. Team lead is also pulled in meetings all day everyday and so never has time to merge...

Today is a great day ! Deadline is tomorrow, fixed all the issues, looks like everything works...

...

CONFLICT (content): Merge conflict in xyz
CONFLICT (content): Merge conflict in abc
CONFLICT.....
...
Automatic merging failed; fix conflicts and then commit the result.

I hate my life :)

From a Dev at my old place: Don't use git for such a small project, I think we should use email to send our code to each other.
Turned out that this "small project" was a piece for a larger project.

Also turns out there's such a thing as merge conflicts outside of git.
Our code was broken for 3 days once because of his shitty advice.

The CTO has admin on the git repo and while we all have to have 2 other people review our pull requests. This guy will just go make a pr and merge it without review. It's not like its perfect code either. I will be going behind him and finding weird shit that he did days later and then go check the git blame. Yup its another one of his had to push it right now without review moments.

The one skill I know that I am really proud of is GIT.

Put me into trouble with merge conflicts.
Saved my life with its version control.
Always had an adventurous ride with Git. Hope to have many more such rides and get to learn more about you.

We had 1 Android app to be developed for charity org for data collection for ground water level increase competition among villages.

Initial scope was very small & feasible. Around 10 forms with 3-4 fields in each to be developed in 2 months (1 for dev, 1 for testing). There was a prod version which had similar forms with no validations etc.

We had received prod source, which was total junk. No KT was given.

In existing source, spelling mistakes were there in the era of spell/grammar checking tools.

There were rural names of classes, variables in regional language in English letters & that regional language is somewhat known to some developers but even they don't know those rural names' meanings. This costed us at great length in visualizing data flow between entities. Even Google translate wasn't reliable for this language due to low Internet penetration in that language region.

OOP wasn't followed, so at 10 places exact same code exists. If error or bug needed to be fixed it had to be fixed at all those 10 places.

No foreign key relationships was there in database while actually there were logical relations among different entites.

No created, updated timestamps in records at app side to have audit trail.

Small part of that existing source was quite good with Fragments, MVP etc. while other part was ancient Activities with business logic.

We have to support Android 4.0 to 9.0 of many screen sizes & resolutions without any target devices issued to us by the client.

Then Corona lockdown happened & during that suddenly client side professionals became over efficient.

Client started adding requirements like very complex validation which has inter-entity dependencies. Then they started filing bugs from prod version on us.

Let's come to the developers' expertise,
2 developers with 8+ years of experience & they're not knowing how to resolve conflicts in git merge which were created by them only due to not following git best practice for coding like only appending new implementation in existing classes for easy auto merge etc.

They are thinking like handling click events is called development.

They don't want to think about OOP, well structured code. They don't want to re-use code mostly & when they copy paste, they think it's called re-use.

They wanted to follow old school Java development in memory scarce Android app life cycle in end user phone. They don't understand memory leaks, even though it's pin pointed by memory leak detection tools (Leak canary etc.).

Now 3.5 months are over, that competition was called off for this year due to Corona & development is still ongoing.

We are nowhere close to completion even for initial internal QA round.

On top of this, nothing is billable so it's like financial suicide.

Remember whatever said here is only 10% of what is faced.

- An Engineering lead in a half billion dollar company.

I have decided that today is going to be a good day.

git merge master && deploy

Merge VS Rebase:
- Did you pick a side?
- Practical tips? Like dealing with merge conflicts
- Have you ever regretted using either?

My answer
* My team squash-merges all branches to master so we don't really care what the branch history looks like. Master history should be pretty - but a branch history can be ugly and filled with a dozen commits.
* Practical tip 1: use `git config rerere.enabled true`. rerere stands for "reuse recorded resolution" and this means if you rebase often you don't have to resolve the same merge conflict twice.
* Practical tip 2: use `git commit --fixup oldcommithash` and then rebase with `--autosquash`
* I like using Rebase. But I have regretted the amount of time I've spent on trying to rebase old branches with many commits only to give up and to `git rebase --abort` since I realised I couldn't handle trying to reapply all the commits chronogically as the changes in the 1st commit were no longer relevant.

GIT COMMMIT LOG VERSION 011
-------------------------
4cc7d0d Derp, asset redirection in dev mode
6b6e213 Lock S-foils in attack position
1e44549 I am even stupider than I thought
2f6bec9 You should have trusted me.
891851a To those I leave behind, good luck!
3367d77 Update .gitignore
46d6b0f Merging the merge
b12f6fe First Blood
0598e4f 8==========D
9151ff4 Finished fondling.
3a0ec1e ...
8358c20 c&p fail
bc1e834 magic, have no clue but it works
31bb17a I don't get paid enough for this shit.
21edb91 :(:(
7a71610 Stephen rebase plx?
2060661 Copy-paste to fix previous copy-paste
21ac5d2 Handled a particular error.
2dedd90 pam anderson is going to love me.
c3d4c83 omg what have I done?
d38bafd Herping the derp derp (silly scoping error)
e461773 Merge pull request #67 from Lazersmoke/fix-andys-shit Fix andys shit
1faf82b Is there an award for this?
1f6e3f3 Feed. You. Stuff. No time.
6f0097d I'm too old for this shit!
133179e I'm just a grunt. Don't blame me for this awful PoS.
d3e5202 harharhar
57d9a7c THE MEM TEST FUNCTION YOU ARE LOOKING FOR, IS HERE. SAY THANKS FOR THIS COMMIT MESSAGE

Just needing somewhere to let some steam off

Tl;dr: perfectly fine commandline system is replaced by bad ui system because it has a ui.

For a while now we have had a development k8s cluster for the dev team. Using helm as composing framework everything worked perfectly via the console. Being able to quickly test new code to existing apps, and even deploy new (and even third party apps) on a simar-to-production system was a breeze.

Introducing Rancher

We are now required to commit every helm configuration change to a git repository and merge to master (master is used on dev and prod) before even being able to test the the configuration change, as the package is not created until after the merge is completed.

Rolling out new tags now also requires a VCS change as you have to point to the docker image version within a file.

As we now have this awesome new system, the ops didn't see a reason to give us access to kubectl. So the dev team is stuck with a ui, but this should give the dev team more flexibility and independence, and more people from the team can roll releases.

Back to reality: since the new system we have hogged more time from ops than we have done in a while, everyone needs to learn a new unintuitive tool, and the funny thing, only a few people can actually accept VCS changes as it impacts dev and prod. So the entire reason this was done, so it is reachable to more people, is out the window.

A custom script that makes a Jira ticket, assigns it to me, marks it as in progress, check out a git branch, set the commit title and the Jira title to my command line argument…. Push, open a PR, and fuck it, merge that shit too.

I checked all the corporate boxes and you got the typo fixed.

WTF PEOPLE!!
Some people really need to read their error messages.

Just now I got this teammate asking me how he should handle the error git returned. The error message stated: "Please commit your changes or stash them before you merge." He asked me what he should do to fix the error... I was astonished by his stupidity that he did not read the fucking error message.

Almost every fucking time a teammate comes to me with the question how to fix an error, there is a message that says how to fix the error. Why don't they read them?!?! I told you so many times to read your fucking error messages!!!

I'm really glad the project is over in a couple of weeks and I get a new team..

When my coworker has to do the merge I be like

Trying to resolve merge conflicts and you cant remember which changes are the ones you want to keep. Lesson learned, make sure your pull requests dont sit waiting for weeks while master is happily being worked on.

An amazing git story: A month ago coworkers did research and started with merge requests. Their workflow is as follows: A Feature is developed in a branch, then a merge request is opened. After a very short review it will be closed (rejected) and merged without request. (wtf!) After that the develop branch will be tested later, in case of bugs, a new branch per feature is opened.

Hmm. This code needs refactoring.
*recodes on Local and uploads*
Works on my branch.
*git push origin master and merge*
Works on Dev.
*deploy to Test*
Works on Test.
*deploy to Live*
Doesn't work.
*compares Live to Test, Dev, and Local*
No f$@%^%%$# difference!?!!

*quits development and lives under a bridge*

When your tech lead revokes everyones merge priviliges on Github because of an issue with "code disappearing from the repo" which he originally suggested was a bug in Github and we should call them for help.

npm merge master
git i

git commit -am "Enhance bugs"

That moment when the code doesn't compile due to an error in a different module that you never touched after merging the master branch into yours...

!rant

Just finished my first game jam officially, it was fun and our game though being not working 100% was well done, we had art people and a sound guy, who btw made some amazing music for the game. A couple of us plan to work on the game after the jam (because we have time) and since it's more of a local jam our deadline for submission is extended until a week after the jam finishes. (Game broke after merge issues :D)

Glad I decided to go and try it out.

Hah but my issue was that moreso my time was spent on getting unity and a git gui or some sort to work on Linux mint, by half way through Saturday I did lol. Also not much for me to do since we had a total of six programmers.

So if I don't get a new laptop for the next game jam, it's setup to work, which is awesome.

Git, conflicts

Story of my day
<<<<Head
code
=======
my code
>>>>>>>

Had a nasty day

*Merge failed

Me : Re clone

Randomly grabbed a open source project off github (zip didn’t use git. Didn’t wanna accidentally request a merge with my garbage code) after talking to the developer on discord about a feature I thought would be cool and he welcomed me to try adding it since he was busy bug fixing the latest release
Never seen the language before in my life (before I started college) and egotistically assumed I’d be able to learn enough to add what I wanted. I was horribly wrong. The farthest I got was potentially understanding how I’d be able to add it as well as getting a placeholder checkbox for the feature in the options form

Soon got discouraged and zipped up what I attempted and put it in my code graveyard on my archive hard drive for a future attempt

Why use git, do it simple, send me your changes by email and I will merge it.
Why split split source code (js) into different files, use one so we will no have trouble about load order.
Use the same user account for github/gitlab/bitbucket/etc. So we will no worry to setup access permisions.
Use Dropbox/Drive for version control.
We will test the whole system until the end when all is finish.

Bitbucket full of dicks!!!

Dude just pushed merge conflict comments!!! At first he was like I did not do it, so I was like git blame bitch! Now he is like it wasn't my fault so what I used force push!

Well that was it I will leave this unholy company!

Typical Git work flow on a feature branch:

Commit#1 : The silly feature itself that took 10 minutes to code
Commit#2 : Added unsaved files
Commit#3 : Fix unit tests
Commit#4 : Fix
Commit#5 : Fix
Commit#6 : Fix
Commit#7 : Various Fix
Commit#8 : Added unsaved files
Commit#9 : Merge
Commit#10 : Fixed unit tests
Commit#11 : Code Review tasks
Commit#12 : Revert- Code Review tasks
Commit#13: Refactor part 1
Commit#14: Refactor part 2
Commit#15: Deleted unit tests
Commit#16: Added checking for null
Commit#17: Completely different feature's bugfix
Commit#18: Code review spacing corrections
*Approved*

Trying to merge, then merge conflicts.....

Whenever i see a door with Push sign, I Pull first to avoid conflicts...

The pain of merging the conflicts of code on which you never worked on ... ahhh omfg ..

TLDR; College group projects suck, not because the work, but the people in your group will make or break you. Fuck having 1 week to do this assignment.

Sometimes working with other students on group projects is great, they actually know how to create a merge a git branch. I've had a decent partner once during my 3 years at university so far. This last project takes the cake on idiots I've worked with...so far at least... It was me and two others, we'll call them Thing1 and Thing2 for now. Anyway so the 3 of us had a week to implement a very rudimentary Invoice system; fine, easy enough. We divided up the work and 'started'.
All seemed to be going well, no complaints or cries for help all week. Until 4 hours before we submit the assignment; Thing 1 sends me a DM saying all of Thing 1's work is useless full of bugs and just shouldn't be integrated with the rest of the code. Umm fine? I guess? wtf?! why did this have to come out last minute?! We could have explained to Thing 1 what's going on and gotten him/her up to speed on everything. Believe it or not, I was sorta ok with this? I mean thing 1 hadn't pushed anything to the repo yet. I mean literally nada, Thing 1 is a collaborator on the repo that has contributed nothing. Seeing as how Thing 1 was contributing nothing I had already started to cover our ass a began Thing 1's work.
That's not even what's pissed me off... at least thing 1 had the gall to message me to say "idk..wtf is going on...continue without me". Thing 2 arguably made my time with the project worse. His code was nothing but garbage...every time...literally spent more time deciphering his incoherent bullshit more than I did rewriting his mess. I shit you not he wrote out this method, and tells the group he's "finally got it fixed and working":
public static float updateTotal(float newValue)
{
total = updateTotal(newValue);
return total;
}

How tf did he test this to see if its working?! I'm a novice and can already see the infinite loop here. You called your method within that method's own definition, what did you expect to happen.
I managed to get things 75% working and turned in 5 mins before the cut off.
Thankfully Thing 1 emailed the Proff as well, hopefully he won't tank my grade too bad. I'm so glad to be done with this assignment, fingers crossed there's no more group work.

Vim is fun to learn. Now when I git merge I'll be in a familiar program instead of a hellish prison.

If you're having merge problems I feel bad for you son, you've got 99 problems but my branch ain't one!

Today I found github student developer pack thing. It was the golden chance to sharpen my git skills at least I thought so.. 2 hours tried to figure out how does "merge" works in gitkraken and now I'm depressed..

Okay, seriously, who invented merge conflicts? I want names! It's like playing Jenga with code, hoping your masterpiece doesn't topple over. I've seen more ">>>>>> HEAD" blocks than actual code lately.

Can we all agree to commit more frequently and save my sanity, please?

God damnit!!

Just got a team assigned for the course I follow and the codebase they work looks like someone shit on the floor and dragged it all over place. No consistency, no clear structure.

The project has to be built in PHP (which is fine by the way) following the principles of MVC. Did I say the codebase looks like shit all over the place? Well that's exactly what it is!!

They use $_SERVER['DOCUMENT_ROOT'] everywhere!! In every fucking file!! Why the FUCK would someone possibly want to do that??

I know I'm not perfect, but what the fuck!!

Now comes the most weird thing. They have to work on a remote server without SSH access, so working with FTP is mandatory. This is because the school won't setup ssh. That's fine by me, but because of that they don't use git!! They upload files directly to the production server. They merge everything manually. I asked why they didn't use git and the answer was so fucking SHIT!! "Because the teacher wants to see who uploaded to the server.."

First off all: what happened to git blame? Second: Later I heard that there is only one FTP account, so all the things they said where just bullshit!!

The fuck.

Tomorrow I'm going to try and convince them to use git..

The main reason I moved from Linux to macOS was that I grew up. If we count not just Linux experiments but prolonged usage, I was an avid Crunchbang fan. After it died, I moved to elementaryos.

What I want to say is, Linux can be very fun and educational when you're still in the uni. You have all the energy in the world, and you can afford to diverge from your daily routine for an hour to debug GPU drivers.
Now, the backbone of my life is keeping a very tight sleep schedule, taking meds on time, avoid infohazards, avoid scrolling on the web, all to remain in a very fragile state of balance that keeps the bipolar disorder away. I'm in the middle of all this, earning derealization (yes, I'm also autistic) every time I design a data model. All I want from my computer is to be treated like a careless, regular user, not like someone with a CS degree.

I use Sublime Merge instead of command line Git. I use Postico to explore PostgreSQL databases, not psql from my terminal. By the way, my terminal is not iTerm, Alacritty or some other such thing, my terminal is whatever came with my Mac, with whatever default settings.

Linux is crawling into a non-street-legal racecar's cockpit and strapping yourself in, ready to blast off. MacOS is your chauffeur, holding your old shaking hand as he helps you into your Maybach's backseat. They're different, and that's okay.
Can Maybach race? Well, it has a 621 HP V12, so if _you_ can race, it probably can too, but we all know it's not a racecar.

Windows? Windows is an SS officer, wearing the all too familiar Windows logo for swastika, throwing you into a gaswagen.

First rant... I'm on a large project where en use Git. Apparently I am the only one who, after pulling the dev branch, do multiple local commits to track (and possibly) undo my local work before I merge into development again. Everyone else do ONE local commit. Am I gitting wrong?!

Git branch, git commit * n, git merge. Not really that hard...

Questions/best practises for git?

For example:
- use present tense in commit messages. (why though?)

A friend of mine also starts his commit messages with either [Task] or [Cleanup]. Useful for finding Commits in Gitlab etc, because only the first line is shown from the message.

Also, one teacher recommended the usage of branches and the other didn't because of alot of potential merge conflicts when working in a Team or a larger Collaboration. What are your thoughts?

Sorry for the messy post, have a hangover

I hate git rebase! Hate! Double hate! Hate e to the x!

Sick of merge commit by commit!!!

I believe Torvalds hates it too.. please tell what’s the big deal not having clean history. Enlighten me.

When you work with people who don't understand git merge conflicts yet...

Some things never change

> Have to deploy only one feature to production
> Create branch from latest tag, cherry pick the correct changes
> Mess up merge
> Almost deploy resulting broken code to production
> Realize at last moment
> Let out a loud sigh, start over

Every damn time.

How to deal with merge-conflicts:

1. You don't
2. Just clone the whole repo anew again and start over dude

trying to do a git merge by command line, because my coworker insists on developing directly on the staging server using ssh

So recently i started using sublime merge. Found the ui kinda useful to review and stage files. Today i was double checking my staged files in smerge and bam! staged files worth an hour disappear! I am pretty sure i didnt click anything. It has to be sublime merge... right?? i could see an undo reset option in menu which didnt work.
Going back to good ol git cli. fuck git ui clients

I just love how XCode handles git merge conflicts. Especially in project meta files. ❤️

git rebase > git merge

I'm honestly tired of colleagues completely fucking up the git history along with creating conflicts for no reason at all.
How do you even manage to "recommit" changes when merging?

I can't even squash properly because there are 5 merge commits on the feature branch. Fuck off

Im left speechless today when my boss (a dev for over 10 years) prefers to use WinMerge to manually merge frequent code changes instead of using the GIT source control.

I am fucking dumb, why I've created an empty project to implement the new feature instead of making a fucking local branch. Now I need to merge this shit manually. fuck fuck fuck

Git :- Push rejected. Merge or Rebase?

Me :- git push -f origin master.

When you try to merge branches :D

If git merge automatically performs a commit to the main branch, how do we add a message to that commit?

Merging one git branch into another when it conflicts an added line or function.

Like really? You can't handle ONE LINE being added?

Ok finally, I can tell now.

There's a college project I'm in with 2 more people that uses Python and AnyLogic (separately).
We also need to write some LaTeX, so as I was already using PyCharm for the Pyshit, I used it for the LaTeX and for Git.
I used it for Git too because I didn't know how it used Git and was worried that if I used the console it didn't recognize something or glitched out or something. And what the hell, it's a mature IDE, what could be so hard or possibly go wrong?

I had to re download the repo a couple of times because between pushes, pulls, merges and commits something happened and the repo ended in a weird state.
These are all the things I do:
Add, commit, create branches, merge, push, pull and delete branches.

So, I hadn't opened in some time. The last time I tried to bring something from another branch, and stayed up late to finish something. I was waiting for my classmates to join the call when I thought something like "Hey, I should commit what I did until now, it worked great.". When I examined the IDE I found out I was in the middle of a rebase or something. I start clicking buttons to at least try to commit. I press "Skip Commit". I lose everything.

What the fuck‽ As you can see in the comprehensive list above, I never do something similar to a rebase. Apparently when I tried to merge a couple of branches, the stupid IDE thought I tried to do a rebase and never asked me to finish it. Why do something I have never asked? Plus, why haven't you prompted me to finish the operation? That's so stupid. I'm never trusting IDEs again.
I was so lit for losing so many hours of work I did a couple of weeks before, I would have to think it and do it all over again because of something I never asked.

We spent an hour looking for a way to recover the lost code.
Why an hour, you ask, if you can use the Local History for that in PyCharm?
Because none of us had used it before and the articles we found said that you had to open it from the toolbar. From the toolbar it was greyed out.
Then I found the option in the contextual menu of the files. Recovered the LaTeX files but on the AnyLogic files, it was greyed out.
I had to open the Local History of the folder containing the AnyLogic file.
And that was that.

I almost faint.
Fuck Python, fuck PyCharm.

Can somebody please explain to me why I need to be an expert at witchcraft & dark magic just to merge 2 SVN branches. And why the fuck anybody still uses SVN when there's git.

Teaching version control would be nice. Git, SVN, CVS. My work uses CVS, and I still have no idea how to properly fork and merge. My knowledge of Git currently starts and ends with GitHub (sorry but true). I stumbled my way with TortoiseSVN just so I could get a WordPress plugin uploaded.

I'm the one one in my team that uses git. In fact, they ask me to set a version control system to collaborate more efficiently... But then I'm the responsible to merge all the versions and spend a lot of time. It is burninge out...

Sitting in a bar with a senior colleague (Me - Student part timer, Him - 15+ Years of experience).
We started talking about our projects and he mentioned that after this, he'd get to spend his evening fixing a git merge, which went wrong because one of his teammates used cherry pick and thus messed up the history a bit (oversimplified).
So he tells me he'd be spending hours to get an overview of his colleagues codes (multiple devs and only team leader knows who does what exactly).
So I suggested he revert these cherry picked commits and so could maybe solve the problem in less time.
He thought about it... Told me HE didn't think of that and thanked me for my help.

Long story short: Today was a good day :3

By Boss insists to do branch merge in a Skype meeting after work time.. he has nothing to do with development but he insists to be with us and lead the procedure..
He thinks this is how Devops works..

After merging 2 branches, Git randomly decided not to merge one particular line (the place where my newly defined function was called) and that caused a fixed bug to reappear. First time in 4 years I am witnessing Git do something strange like this— probably an issue in the “merge by ort strategy”.

Yesterday, I was expecting my merge request to be closed.
I've done all the stuff my tech lead told me to do.

All tests passes, green light boyzzzzz.
Gitlab CI pipeline passes, greeeeeen light I said.

In Jenkins everything f*cked up...

Why ??

Well it was a conflict with 3 other MRs, missing rebase from other dudes.

And because they were remote working, got to clean up all this mess.

That's was a day off.

PS : well that's was not so off, I could fix a UB on a ternary and extend a test which was not covering some cases.

PS2 : learn git damn

After having witnessed developers use IntelliJ's built-in git functionality, I am persuaded that it should have never existed in the first place.

Asking you if you want to git add after every file you create, providing dangerous shortcuts that do pull, merge and push at once, but most importantly providing just enough comfort to keep their users ignorant about interactive git add or rebase, and other advanced git functionality.

The search for all the UI buttons + IntelliJ's baseline 5G RAM consumption is both slower and more error-prone than using the Git CLI

So today my colleague is installing new dependency to our react native project and do something cool with it.

Him: I already push it in new branch and make a pr, would you review and merge it to master.
Me: ok let me try first.
.
.
Me: it is not working, i get this error.
Him: try change these xxx in xcode.
Me: ok, wait.
.
.
Me: now I get this error
Him: hmm... Try 'react-native link xxxx'
Me: ok
.
.
Me: I get same error like first error.
Him: now try 'react-native unlink xxxx'
Me: hmm... Wait.
.
.
Me: I still get same error, what's wrong?
Him: I don't know, it's working in my mechine .

*Me 'git reset - - hard' and try to build again.
**After building

Me: hey it's working after I git reset lol.
Him: nice
Me: let me clone it and try 1 more time.

*after cloning and building
.
.
Me: I still get same error like 1st error hahaha.
Him: so try to 'react-native link xxx' again.
Me: OKkK
.
.
Me: still get same error
Him: try git reset and build again
Me: hmm
.
.
*after git reset and build again
Me: I still get same error. I think the correct steps is :
1. Clone
2. Do something in xcode
3. React native link
4. React native unlink
5. Git reset - - hard
6. Build

I can't stop laughing 😂🤣😂🤣🤣😂🤣😂