In an effort to deal with the number of “top priority” tickets, management has come up with a new priority level, “urgent”, to help differentiate between tickets that are “top priority” and tickets that are actually “top priority”.

So as you can guess all tickets are now codified as “urgent”.

I’ve suggested management downgrade some tickets back to merely “top priority” as we’re clearly right back where we started with it being difficult to determine which order to do tickets in.

They’ve ignored my request as the bletherings of a clearly unenlightened peon, and have instead came up with a new priority, “mission critical” which will be reserved for the most hallowed of emerg— oh no wait everything is now “mission critical” who would have guessed?

So “Top priority” is the now lowest priority a ticket can have…Naturally.

(Qt + OpenGL) didn't piss me off for a whole week..
My point clouds are rendering great..
I guess I could speed it up a little bit..
I'm doing good..
So yeah..
no rant..

Interviewer: I don't understand. With a resume and portfolio like yours you shouldn't be applying to companies like us. You should be setting your sights on companies like Google/Meta. You'd be bored here after everything you've done so far. I know we're offering more money than your current position but you're worth more believe me. I'm going to keep looking, and so should you. But you need to aim higher.

Dev: ...

Well fuck me I guess?

When I'm coding, I often come up with some cool algos and when I do, I feel pretty good.
But the next second, I get this feeling that I know there are a million other people in the world who have solved the same problem with the same or better algorithm and I feel like shit. Like all the work I put in is somehow redundant.

Like finding answers on StackOverflow... When you do, you know the person who answered has already done it. You're just repeating it. But again, the fact that I'm looking for answers from other people in the first place is ....

I don't know. I guess I need to change the way I code from now on....

My most f*cked up client process I ever had to deal with:

Digitalizing E-Mails.

I seriously asked if they were joking on me… Wasn't the case.

The process was: Get E-Mail, print out, scan, archive (digitally).

Nobody could explain to me the necessity for this bullsh*t.
"Hmm... Kinda always worked this way, I guess"
The client was a big company. My coworker aged 5x faster during that project. I swear to god, I'm not joking.

Absolute asshat level clownly clownshipness:

Manager: Why is this like this? 🤡

fullStackClown: ...Because you defined the feature like this.

Manager: Hmmmmm ok... what about this? Why is this like this? 🤡

fullStackClown: ...Because you defined the feature like this.

Manager: Hmmmmm ok... and then this thing here? Why is this like this? 🤡

fullStackClown: Well, I hate to tell you, but it's a huge surprise. Guess what?! BECAUSE YOU DEFINED THE FEATURE LIKE THIS!!!

Manager: ... 🤡

fullStackClown: Any other absolute asinine questions to ask me to continue breaking me from flow?

Manager: ... 🤡

fullStackClown: ...

To those interested, I believe there is an evolution of my devRant career in order... I'm passing the clown phase... and entering the full-on circus phase...

FUCK CORPORATE EMAIL SPAM

AND I DON'T MEAN SOME SOME EXTERNAL SCAM/AD/PISHING EMAILS

I MEAN THE SHIT MY OWN COMPANY SENDS TO ME

LIKE:

"tHE WelLbeIng Course : SiGN In now!!!!!"

"#MoRnIngcOfFEE witH SOME cORporatE TWAt"

"Give togetHER : LETs circLE JerK OurSeLveS in SOMe fuCKiNg oNLiNe mEetInG !!!!!!!"

I DON'T FUCKING CARE !

I GET DOZENS (IF NOT FUCKING HUNDREDS) OF SUCH SHIT EMAILS EVERY DAY.

IF I GO ON VACATION, I HAVE TO SPEND HOURS TO SORT SHIT OUT

I HAVE HAD TO SET UP ELABORATE OUTLOOK RULES TO GET IT SORTED AUTOMATICALLY INTO SOME MANAGEABLE FOLDERS (AND SPEND SOME OF MY LIMITED TIME, HERE ON EARTH, TO DO SO)

AND GUESS WHAT

THANKS TO THOSE STUPID RULES I MISSED, ONE FUCKING IMPORTANT EMAIL

CAN YOU JUST STOP FUCKING SPAMMING ME ?!!!

FOR CHRIST SAKE AND I DON'T CARE ABOUT THIS STUPID CORPORATE BULLSHIT

STOP SENDING IT TO ME

I discovered a function in our database that converts integers to ordinals by concatenating the number and a suffix:
- ends in 1: add “st”
- ends in 2: add “nd”
- ends in 3: add “rd”
- else: add “th”
Simple! Except I guess nobody considered the 11st, 12nd, and 13rd iteration of this function…

In this episode of "office drama", we have the head secretary asking me if I want to contribute to the gift for the baby of some guy I don't know well. (I'm new to the office btw)
When I refuse, saying that I don't know him well enough to want to contribute, she says "that's okay, but we won't be collecting for a gift for you once you have a baby. We want to be a '''team''' ".

😐

I just said "that's fair", but maaaaaaaan! Since when is it okay to demand that someone participates in a gift, while ignoring their social or financial circumstances? 😤

Update: went to her office to talk about this "being a part of the team" and clear things up. She said, and I quote "I don't have time for this". And by that, swords have been unsheathed. I guess there is no pleasing some people.

I was 8 years old the boy in the block invited me said I have something to show you. His parents bought him a Macintosh. He typed my name on the black screen and there was a response.
He said look it says “How are you?” And I was mesmerised got so excited I was like wow 😲
Guess what the text was actually saying? syntax error 😂 Little did I know at that time!!
I went home and told my parents, can you believe what I’ve seen today?? Computer responded me talked to me!!
On my birthday I got a Commodore 64 that year and the story begun.

It hasn't even been two weeks since quitting the clowns and I've:

- recorded and edited a new React TypeScript course
- released a new SaaS product (in alpha)
- cleaned up and optimized the home page of an existing SaaS app
- started a mobile app version of said SaaS app
- started working with an agency to drive more traffic to same said SaaS app including guest posts and content creation.

I guess I always had it in me but needed to be broken by the rate race system one final time before venturing out on my own.

Refreshing.

Worst meeting. Hmm..

Embarrassment wise maybe the one where my boss called me the queen of porn in front of everyone. Yes, classy AF. (Just have to know him to know his sense of humor I guess).

Most cringe worthy meeting was probably when our out of state national director came in and basically told us he has no clue what we do nor does her care to learn. We brought up salaries to him as well as we're in the bottom 8th percentile for the industry in our area with HUMONGOUS work loads, like 20 sites per developer at once. This is a huge multi-million dollar corporation, mind you. We told him some of us have to have 3 jobs to survive and he basically said well you're an at will employee so there's the door. He also took phone calls and sent emails during my one on one meeting which we never finished even though he promised to. But he bought us a shirt, so you know, it's all cool. 🙄

"Why are these guys faster than us at development?"
"The company that has received millions in investment and has a bigger development team? Yeah no clue man, I guess they are just better than us."

On the presentation for my database project my team and I showed a NodeJS + Mongo + VueJS project with cloud storage capability, nothing fancy but did everything from scratch (from token auth and system encryption to the frontend CSS and the database) the teacher made some questions and meh'd at it.

Behold team two's project, WordPress with a standard template and phpMyAdmin, teacher loves it because "it's so beautiful"

Guess who just failed that class?

God I love college, it's the best time investment I've ever done and it'll surely pay out.

Had 2 days of vacation. Theoretically (plus weekend, plus 2 days) 6 days.

Worked today… At Saturday.

Some administrators forgot to properly check bandwidth limitations....

*rolls eyes*

We had a major version upgrade of some server software at Monday.

Guess why I got called...

Of course it MUST be the software upgrade.

It couldn't be the new hardware that was setup 2 weeks ago and on which a lot of "important" VMs were migrated.

*eyes roll inside till only white is visible*

The even more annoying thing is that it wasn't that hard to figure out.

Looking at monitoring, we had spikes on 20 Gbit/s (roughly 2.x Gigabyte/sec - Ethernet) connection of some server at roughly 1.9 plus Gigabyte/sec.

IO latency spikes that made the graph look like a heartbeat EKG with severe tachycardia...

*additionally to white eyes starts cursing in reverse latin*

Incompetent admin answer: Booboo that can only be your fault - the developers must investigate.

Me (just a tad more polite): Meep Meep mother fucker, get your shit together. If the software would eat that much, the network would be a niece chunk of charcoal. Plus the time (sending instead of links to monitoring pictures… guess the lazy fucktard who's brain is a vacuum didn't even bother to check it)...

NOTICE SOMETHING?!

Incompetent admin: It starts at the same time. Always.

After wasting roughly another hour of time discussing with him, I just hanged up the video call.

Called someone I knew from the admin department and turns out that - drumrolls please - the incompetent admin was someone who got recruited 3 months ago…

*turning into antichrist*

I then had a not so polite discussion about how the only competent people could take days off (all except incompetent admin were on vacation) and the seemingly incompetent fresh recruit - who by the way NEVER mentioned this - was the only one left of the admin department. Which would be bad alone, but no - he even got the 24/7 emergency support role for the whole weekend.

Sometimes this company and HR especially notoriously drive me insane...

Guess next week there will be some HR barbecue.

But yeah. After a lot of raging around we nailed it down to the traffic of backups and could fix it.

Roughly 4 hours of analysis, communication, raging and hatred.

Just one hour implementing shit.

*goozfraba*

Worst part of being a dev?

THERE'S A NEW FREAKIN FRAMEWORK EVERYDAY.

Where are we supposed to get time to learn everything the job applications require? And even worst, have 2 years of experience with the thing?

And how about when developing a responsive dynamic website? If you are crazy, like me, and you are the kind of dev that always wants to deliver something great, customized to the needs of your client, and that doesn't smell bootstrappy, you probably can't stand too when people ask you about time guesstimates. Especially when you are the ONLY DEV in your company.

Also, our gear is EXPENSIVE.

Sorry, I guess I'm stressed... Had to bring some work home, due to the bosses deciding to deliver a project one week early to the client, without consulting me first.

Still, luckily for me, all this bullshit can't take my love of coding away.

My worst interview ever was my first interview fresh out of college. After the initial phone screen, they asked me to drive 2 hours to their office to give me a "code challenge."

The challenge was to spend 4 hours writing a simple rest API for a blog type thing, but the catch was to not use any existing libraries for data access and instead write an entirely database agnostic DAL. Then after I finished they sat me in a conference room with 3 of their engineers and the CEO to just tear apart my code.
For a JUNIOR position to someone fresh out of college.

I guess I defended it well, because they asked to continue the process l, but after that I found a different position.

Reading 3GPP standards is so painful. I download a document to read it. A month or so later, an updated version is out. I need to download it again. It's so annoying to keep checking. I guess I'll have to write yet another script for yet another fucking problem.

The documents themselves are not that good too. My work would be a lot easier if there is a web interface for the standards.

My little daughter came to me all excited, saying "Daddy! Daddy! Guess how old I'll be in June!"
"Oh I don't know princess, why don't you tell me?" I said. She gave me a huge smile and held up four fingers.
It's now three hours later, police have joined in and she still won't say where she got them.

I was working with a guy 3 years ago, he was junior web developer. Lazy for work, watching YouTube and game streamers all day long at the office. Sometimes i was fixing his crappy code.
And ... one week ago I was surprised seeing this guy come to my current work office as senior web developer.
Im also new at this office and i had good impression i was working with professionals before this happened. Guess what... This guy hasnt changed much. Still writes crappy code , no idea of clean code at all.
I got concerns about my work place now :/ thinking to change it.

FAEs are missing I guess xD

Oh boy some mutex deadlocks inside the 16 year old, unmaintained, company application framework.

Time to look at the stack traces of 24 different threads and try and guess which one fucks it up

(Send help)

take your fucking feelings out of the equation

AND GET OVER IT

feelings don't get market share, features built, or any growth

so shut the hell up and grow up

AND DO YOUR DAMN JOB

you'll be proud devRant, I've finally decided to leave these clowns. updates to come...

only sad part is my rage posting will likely drop to very low levels, but i guess my own well being is a bit more important than devRant karma :) 🤷‍♂️

Well, for starters there was a cron to restart the webserver every morning.

The product was 10+ years old and written in PHP 5.3 at the time.

Another cron was running every 15 minutes, to "correct" data in the DB. Just regular data, not from an import or something.
Gotta have one of those self-healing systems I guess.

Yet another cron (there where lots) did run everyday from 02:00 to 4ish to generate the newest xlsx report. Almost took out the entire thing every time. MySQL 100%. CPU? Yes. RAM? You bet.

Lucky I wasn't too much involved at the time. But man, that thing was the definition of legacy.

Fun fact: every request was performed twice! First request gave the already logged-in client an unique access-token. Second request then processed the request with the (just issued) access-token; which was then discarded. Security I guess.

I don't know why it was build this way. It just was. I didn't ask. I didn't wanted to know. Some things are better left undisturbed. Just don't anger the machine. I became superstitious for a while. I think, in the end, it help a bit: It feels like communicating with an alien monster but all you have is a trumpet and chewing gum. Gentle does it.

Oh and "Sencha Extjs 3" almost gave me PTSD lol (it's an ancient JS framework). Followed by SOAPs WSDL cache. And a million other things.

Gotta do it, I guess.

Performance Review: You’ve slowed down.

My head: I never get to code cause all we do is meetings. Like no shit I have slowed down. Why the fuck do we have 3 days just full of meetings that I don’t even contribute to ?! I’m not gonna do overtime for this shit

Me (actually): Ah, shucks! Guess we can work on that huh?

Nothing pisses me off more than a manager that keeps demanding shit but when you ask for support they deny it from you. well guess what? two can play this game, bitch.

I had my first interview

My answer was 90% "I'll learn it"

I wasn't even know what should I learn and now I know, so I get something through interview I guess

A client came to the startup I was working at, to discuss a potential schools/universities based project. Their requirements were as follows

1. Full control of every class's daily routine (based on teacher's availabilities).
2. Multiple-choice exam feature (Timed).
3. Individual dashboards for teachers, head of departments, the Headmaster for every school onboarded on the platform.
4. Scores analysis of every student in every class (Report card).
5. Attendance feature for every student.

And so on.

Guess their budget for the above.

200 USD. FUCKING 200 US Dollars !!!!

My stomach hurt that day from laughing.

X: Hi, regarding that ticket that you made...

You said "Implement logging to find out the culprit in site generation"...

What do you mean exactly?

Me: "Read the meeting notes, we had a full discussion on this 2 weeks ago".

X: "We don't understand it..."

Me: "As I said before, I have no experience in this tech stack... I'd expect bla to have a logging framework and I'd - for easier recognition - implement additional logging levels based on criteria <me just reading the meeting notes>"

X: But how do we do it?

...

I wish I had invented this discussion.

Because it hurts.

For the jolly of it, I had similar discussions today.

Three times to be exactly.

As I asked some dev what I should do next, put a foley catheter up his urethra or change the bed pan he wasn't amused.

Guess I'll get monday a call of HR.

So Monday I have less work to do, which is awesome.

Ok might as well share my misadventure on a phone screen:

It started pretty normal, the guy talks about his background, the position, and asked me about my background.

Move on to the language trivia; I’m not good at memorizing language features, but I guess it’s what people want, so I’ll be working on that down the road… Anyways it didn’t go well, and the guy somehow made me feel like an idiot even on the questions I got right.

It’s really awkward at this point… but let me tell you I was not prepared for what I can only describe as the fucking coding portion of the phone screen…

No computer. No pencil or paper. No whiteboard. Over the phone I’m saying: “class Dog with a capital ‘D’ colon newline tab def space bark open parentheses close parentheses….”

what the actual fuck

A lot of people on here seem really really REALLY angry. I guess that's the idea.

So we started using React with Polaris and Supabase and Vite and guess which one doesnt have very good documentation, all of then. Kill me like a command window task

#fuckapple for holding back the open-web. Most folk don't know that Chrome on iOS is just Safari with a skin; neither Google or Apple want you to know that.

If you hate web-apps on iOS, that is Apple's intentional doing. Apple cannot allow a bug-free and modern browser to run on their iOS devices, else they lose their 30% tax + dev fees cut. There are literally so many crippling bugs in iOS Safari that it HAS to be intentional.

There are email exchanges between Phil Shaffer and Steve Jobs from years past, where Phil didn't believe Apple could continue to gouge users 30%. He argued the open-web would make native apps largely redundant, and so to stay competitive, they'd need to drop the store fees to something reasonable. I suppose Steve Jobs saw a different solution -- just impede browser development.

As someone who develops free and open-source apps, I believe I am doing the world a favour by not supporting a native iOS app. When users complain about missing features in the web-app version, I tell them to take it up with Apple or buy an Android. Guess what? They sometimes actually do just that.

Join me if you have the balls. Tell Apple to FUCK OFF the only way they understand -- threaten their bottom line. At the very least, you'll never need to touch XCode again if you do. If time is money, that alone will make you wealthy.

I'm seriously having a lot of fun with ChatGPT and learning a whole bunch of things I didn't know before. The ease of asking it questions and getting a general idea on things is amazing.

Bye bye to my job, but at least I'll know a bunch of different things, I guess 😂

I thought I'd always be a die-hard proponent of working from home; it can be great for the right person: and I thought that would be me; but with the family I have? It's turning into a disaster. They're too used to having me around, my wife is becoming too used to making arrangements that involve me taking an hour or two out of the day here and there; she doesn't know the impact of context switching in the middle of the day. If I refuse to help her out, that makes me the asshole. Then I get ratty because I feel the stress of being unproductive, and guess whose fault it is again? Mine. The kids rush in and out of my work area, or get upset when I come out for a coffee and don't want to spend time with them, but it's not their fault, at 2 and 4 they don't understand. Take me back to the fucking office, I'm done.

I just want to work. How hard is the concept of being left the fuck alone.

Today teaching the product managers what the channel in "selected for development" in Jira means.

Guess what? IT MEANS THE FEATURE IS READY TO BE DEVELOPED ON, NOT SOME HALF-BAKED CROCK POT IDEA WITH A TWO-SENTENCE DESCRIPTION DESCRIBING ABSOLUTELY FUCK ALL!!!

Once upon a time
Performance Review, "great job", "like all your achievements so far".. signed.

Two days later, same manager, "as you can guess, you didn't pass probation. Could have done more."
"Oh more like?"
"Just, you know, more."

Man the senior dev where I work produces the most half baked shit solutions but I guess management loves em because he produces results.

Like Holy fuck this whole place just has a raging hard on for Microsoft products. Plus management won't spend any money on dealing with any of the tech debt and our prod solution is just to erect more monoliths.

Someone please end my suffering

Just a random thought, I sometimes in my sleep am able to switch my fucking alarm off, so it will be good if an app can move the entire stop/snooze button randomly on the screen. It will be effective I guess, what do you guys think?

Our boss did always the same thing. When there was a BIG potential customer who indicates a small interest in our software, then he lied constantly about features. After the customer bought our software we got a deadline and should develop the missing features. I could remember two features: The first one was a quote tool for a car transport company. The tool should estimate a price for a transportation from an email with no structure and the other one was an API which should be possible to write dynamicly to MySQL, MariaDB, Postgres, MSSQL, DB2, Mongo or better said any possible dbms. The API should guess the structure of the dbs and offer CRUD actions. The funny thing is must write the api with go. Yeah dynamic and GO.

At some time, we told him we wont make any overtime and if the deadline is not possible we told that immediatly the customers, so that they call him. Thank god I don't work anymore in this company.

People:
- human brain is imperfect, makes too many mistakes
- let's make a computer that could perform perfect precise calculations
- computers are imperfect, require a set of clearly predefined rules [by human] to operate
- let's create a computer that behaves like human brain - an AI
- ...

Guess what's gonna be the next entry :)

Oh boy... something just happened I'd have never expected.
Remember my rants about the PHP CMS Of Doom™?
Guess what... the boss of said company just called me to offer me a job as their new tech lead. WTF.

I'd rather slowly impale myself on a rusy pickaxe.
I'd rather tattoo my face with a giant, pulsating, uncircimcised shlong.
I'd rather take a swim in a pool of Hydrogen fluoride.
I'd rather work 80h/wk on pimple extraction.

For those struggling with imposter syndrome, keep a record of your progress.

Break it down into

* used

* learning

* dont need a manual or cheat sheet

* use every day

You can also break it down per project:.

"Project xyz (python: 2 years)"
"Project ijk (js:6 months)".

Etc.

Critically, keep these in something physical, like a notebook or whatever you use *regularly and frequently* to keep notes. That's important because you should be glancing over your progress as a remainder.

Each time you want to add a new line, rewrite your existing progress on a new page, before adding the new line.

So as you flip through the pages you get a large and larger chronological list of your progress, and improvement, and experience.

Add a date to the title for each and a brief note about something that you did or happened on that day or week.

You wont second guess yourself so much once you can see how far you came.

Like at one time I was actually competent at js! (Before I stopped the flash cards anyway).

Burnout is the absolute worst. Feeling like you can’t bring yourself to do anything even though you really want to work on the project. You know logically that you want to get it done and you do genuinely care about the project. But you just can’t bring yourself to commit to it anymore because you’ve given it your all for far too long. You keep telling yourself that you will get us back to work tomorrow or the day after. But rest never feels like enough rest it’s exhausting. Baby steps I guess. I feel like at this point I’ve just developed a habit of putting it off. Time to build a more constructive habit.

Just finished a technical interview for a company that asked me to submit a small app.

I guess when they had written the requirements they had anticipated it to be written as a Webform not as a full MVC application 😂. They had expected me to complete and build this single page app in 2-3 hours not in 14... 🫥 Oops

So here we are reviewing it and asking questions about my setup and what I was trying to do. They were impressed enough with it that one guy even admitted that I might be a better programmer than him. 😳 A very kind compliment, but concerning because he's supposed to be my manager...

All in all got through everything and they want me over to meet the team and see what this shop is all about.
I'm excited, they company is seeing immense growth and I might be able to bring in my expertise to expedite some of it.

Did I mention they use SVN for version control? 😳
They want to get into Git soon but they don't know how to. I guess I'll be leading that cause.

[CMS of Doom™]
Gotta love the fact that the fuckers who originally "coded" this abomination of a CMS implemented a method which replaces some text before sending the HTML to the client.
Guess what fucks with my code?

Why the fuck do people not change their router admin password!? I was at a hotel today and could access their router admin interface with the default credentials. I guess this isn't purely the fault of the hotel because not all people know a damn thing about security and only use the interface to change the SSID and password of the AP. But why allow them to leave the default password? Why isn't this a standard feature to be forced to change the password :|

I guess crying is the equivalent of removing cache from browser, a pain relief for both of you, the computer and the human being

Buffer usage for simple file operation in python.

What the code "should" do, was using I think open or write a stream with a specific buffer size.

Buffer size should be specific, as it was a stream of a multiple gigabyte file over a direct interlink network connection.

Which should have speed things up tremendously, due to fewer syscalls and the machine having beefy resources for a large buffer.

So far the theory.

In practical, the devs made one very very very very very very very very stupid error.

They used dicts for configurations... With extremely bad naming.

configuration = {}
buffer_size = configuration.get("buffering", int(DEFAULT_BUFFERING))

You might immediately guess what has happened here.

DEFAULT_BUFFERING was set to true, evaluating to 1.

Yeah. Writing in 1 byte size chunks results in enormous speed deficiency, as the system is basically bombing itself with syscalls per nanoseconds.

Kinda obvious when you look at it in the raw pure form.

But I guess you can imagine how configuration actually looked....

Wild. Pretty wild. It was the main dict, hard coded, I think 200 entries plus and of course it looked like my toilet after having an spicy food evening and eating too much....

What's even worse is that none made the connection to the buffer size.

This simple and trivial thing entertained us for 2-3 weeks because *drumrolls please* none of the devs tested with large files.

So as usual there was the deployment and then "the sudden miraculous it works totally slow, must be admin / it fault" game.

At some time it landed then on my desk as pretty much everyone who had to deal with it was confused and angry, for understandable reasons (blame game).

It took me and the admin / devs then a few days to track it down, as we really started at the entirely wrong end of the problem, the network...

So much joy for such a stupid thing.

I guess I am having what is called a burnout.

I feel braindead, unmotivated to do anything, constantly tired and sleepy, and the only thing I want is to hibernate and wake up somewhere in spring.

i find it interesting that the intent when this app was created was probably to let people rant about bugs and stupid errors, post dev memes, and it has evolved to a point where we hear a lot of rants related to the work environment. my guess is that the rest of the internet is so visible and damning that this became a safe space where we can discuss work relations with less fear.

i love that the community here is so supportive in these matters :)

Me a month ago: "I'm done with full-time corporate work. I'm going to shift to freelance only so I can enjoy my life and not be in a grind, bowing and scraping to a manager all day."

*Recruiter finds me and offers me a full-time opportunity*

Me now: "Well, I guess I can look into it..."

Me 9 months from now: "I'm done with full-time corporate work. I'm going to shift to freelance only so I can enjoy my life and not be in a grind, bowing and scraping to a manager all day."

Repeat until dead.

Most upsetting interview rejection?

Back when I graduated college, I did the usual rounds of interviews with insurance companies, banks, various other institutional businesses set up by the college's career center.

One local insurance company interview I thought went great. Usual 'Where do you see yourself in 5 years?' type questions, told her about my job history, very high level type stuff.

Couple of weeks later I get a letter in the mail and after the usual 'It was great to meet you blah blah blah', it ended with
'State Farm will never consider you for a position with our company.'

Never?! My then fiance (now wife) yelled "WHAT DID YOU DO?!!!" and I racked my brain for anything I might have said or done. The HR lady was attractive, but I didn't stare at any body parts and I didn't make any weird sexual advances (I was nervous enough without *that* going thru my mind).
The college career center floods the local companies with graduates and I was #5 in the waiting room that day. My only guess was they got me confused with someone else.

My fiance wanted me to call them immediately to straighten out any misunderstanding, but I knew what was done, was done. It's not like they would realize "Oh, that's right, it was Bob that kept looking at Karen's breasts, not you...come work for us!" Besides, why would I want to work someplace that didn't know/care who I was?

Day 653

I still didn't manage to close vim but I dont wan't to close my terminal.
Guess I'll accept my new buddy on my screen. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Just curious.

Has anyone ever had to face the wrath of the people they were ranting about here in devRant?

I introduced my reporting manager to this network, and I have done some amount of ranting about him.

I guess you could say 'danger' is my middle name.

Guess the car company

First day back at work and I already want to commit to alcoholism

Happy new year I guess

Fucking jesus christ, for some reason in chromium-based browsers if you have a table that fills up to the full height of the parent using flexbox rules, if you go to print it, it will fucking

i forgor 💀

and give it a height of minimum content height. The solution is to ALSO give it height: 100%;

Google completely unhelpful (I guess it's too specific and most people don't write web services specifically made for printing out?) but luckily it only took me like 3 guesses to figure out on my own.

But I could have easily seen this completely pissing me off to the point of quitting. FireFox doesn't have this issue.

RELATED TANGENT RANT:

Why the fuck is the default to use headers, footers, margin, and no background images (colors) ?!?!?!? The default printing for browsers COMPLETELY FUCKS UP THE PRINT

God FUCKING damnit.

So, some years ago, my old firm was bought by a much larger company.

A couple years later, my CTO resigned, as he needed a week deserved break. I acted as interim CTO for half a year, with the full support of the CEO.

But then higher management removed my CEO for a politician 🤡. His first move is to ask my ex-CEO who to consider for CTO.

He adamantly vouches for me, but in the end, I'm not "political" enough. (Sure I admit I'm not the most organized person, and do not sweeten arguments to suits, but I had won the full trust of my previous superiors *and* fellow devs, and had people to cover for organizational stuff, and have successfully navigated situations with the world's biggest tech orgs).

So I'm again a dev, and they hire this new CTO at twice my salary. But as you can probably guess, who ends up still doing all the CTO work on top of his dev work? Yeah.

That drove me to quit, not because of the demotion, but for a denied minor raise when I was doing the work of someone with twice my paycheck.

As could be expected, once I quit, the CTO barely lasted 6 months.

Fun part is, I've been freelancing (successfully) from them on, and I've been contacted by this CTO, trying to hire me to do some work in his new company...

I'm torn whether to tell him to bite me, charge him a shitton of money or any other funny ideas.

Mind you, I don't dislike the guy, and he's not particularly annoying to work with, so I guess this doubles as a rant against corporate clowns, and a bit of advice seeking.

Well I guess it's official, I love TypeScript

Today I told 3 devs that they either get their shit together or they can pack their things and look for a job.

I can get easily pissed, but it's rather rare for me to get to that point easily.

Now my dear friends, can you guess what they did?

I give you a hint...

They made a test suite validating a network library.

So we have roughly 200 plus lovely splitted tests, neatly put in a directory structure - lovely organization.

(I might have written in the ticket that as a requirement... Cause I know my lil hellspawns)

But as I started looking at some tests, there was always something missing...

Network library...

So we needed to create an endpoint... And handle of course the tests communication with the endpoint *somewhere*.

I'd guess you know already what these mofos did...

Yeah. We have one class.... That handles all tests endpoints... Via different methods... Plus additional methods like utility functions....

The ticket was easy they said.

Me chewing their heads off was easy too.

Jesus Christ, I really doubt sometimes that some devs are able to go to a toilet.

Maybe thats the reason some wear baggy pants - easier to hide the pampers.

*rolls eyes*

NO, YOU ABSOLUTE DISGUSTING GREMLIN OF A JS HTTP CLIENT, I DON'T WANT YOU TO "JsOn.StRiNgiFy" MY PAYLOAD OR DOING ANY WEIRD SHIT

I NEED TO SEND THIS THING EXACTLY AS IT'S WRITTEN, STOP TRYING TO GUESS WHAT I'M TRYING TO DO I'M A DEV WITH SOME 7 YEARS OF EXPERIENCE WRITING CODE, I'M SENDING A STRING CUZ I NEED TO SEND A STRING

Apparently I'm not dishonest enough about my mistakes owing up to my mistakes too much when interacting customers. Fuck me for being honest, I guess?

The coworkers I work with are really smart and capable at their job. PRs with 20+ commits. So guess what? all the PRs are squashed “by default”, so every commit in the history has 100 file changes. Fan fucking tastic. I totally don’t want to kill myself. As an added bonus, all of it is in an Azure repo, so we can’t actually search PRs which is awesome. Plus, all the BE developers want us to do their job! It’s an amazing learning experience!!!

So, yet another "senior" web developer employed by my contractor who utterly fails to understand CORS.

I mean, easy enough to config their servers to provide the headers. A good and quick buck.

But I swear the level of idiocy I find in so called "seniors" infuriates me. I swear, he didn't even figure out that

A) you can't make the browser omit the Origin header.
(But it works on curl 😭😭😭)

B) it's the *server* who must include access-control-allow-origin in the response, not you in the request. Like, what use would that be? I don't even...

😞

I guess if I ever need to hire web devs again my only question during the interview will be "explain CORS to me".

How to make your employees feel like shit 101:

Continually praise a small group of people for doing something for a few days that someone else does as their full time job. Call what that team did "unlike anything else in the software development world"

I am soooo fucking pissed right now. You can guess what side of this I am on.

We are going to use MERN stack for this. Do you feel comfortable with that?

Me: yup

Finds code in Koa. *sigh* Guess I'll have to learn Koa now.

Fuck, they updated the internal move policy in my company from 1 year 9 months to move to another team to be at least in the same team for 2 years.

I hope I can find a way to gtfo faster because I am honestly so tired of this shit, the tasks are getting too repetitive, my boss is useless, spends her time shopping instead of working and being stuck with a bunch of juniors means you only have the internet to learn something new.

I really want to start delving more into PAAS and start working with docker and kubernetes. Oh well, guess we'll have to wait and see.

I created some test entities specifically for our staging site. Written in all capitalized letters in the BIG TITLE of the entity I included DO NOT DELETE. This is very clearly visible in the CMS. What's the first thing the content managers do?

You guessed it.

I guess if plain English doesn't work, I'll have to use Kindergarten rules and put a custom lock on them so they can never be deleted.

Muad'Dib fullstackchris can already predict the future, in a few weeks: "hey!!!! fullstackchris, I can't delete these test entities!!!!! whats wrong with the system?!?!"

sigh...

I hate that "integer overflows" have become somewhat pop culture because anytime I see someone try to use it in a joke, they use it wrong.

I've even seen people confuse them with stack overflows and be like "my intelligence is so low it stack underflowed and became the max of an integer value!"

Or "It overflowed and became zero again" ah, I guess it happened to be unsigned and overflowed by precisely 1 then eh?

So cringe

"Hey Bobby, can you do XYZ for me? I can do it myself but it's such a pain in the ass"

So why the fuck would I do it if you can do it yourself? Guess what it's a pain in the ass for me too! And it's not even my problem!

I guess the job I’m at now? I’ve been paid for 8 months and I’ve produced nothing, they’re happy about it and I was given a pay rise. It has taken me months to make deployments and I feel like some days I might’ve well of had a day off. If I had a sick day I still get paid for a full day even if it was for a whole week. How did I get this job and wtf do I even do? 😂💃🏻💃🏻 <= that’s me dancing

Looking around where I work, I'm reminded of when I was young and ambitious, like all the other kids around me at the time, with a dislike for all the older dudes and dudettes in upper management. With the exception of three other guys around my age, everyone, including the CEO, was in high school, middle school, elementary school, or not even born yet when I started my career. Just like them, I was plucky and chatty and (trying to be) funny and social. I didn't know how fast I would go from that set to the old fat guy that they look askance at and wonder how I'm still around with my weird ways and "boomerish", socially retarded behavior. What's really galling is that I'm solidly Gen X, like some of them, but I guess I talk more like a Boomer because my parents were older when I was born and I was kinda raised in that mindset. I'm the office schlub now. A man out of my time. And I've never been in any kind of upper management, even. I am Kevin Malone.

I never understood why designers design radio and checkbox inputs like that. I guess the standard design is too much accessible.

It's uh, my hobby I guess.
And wtf is vacation?

Me: I've not done this before, so any guess would be pure assumption.

Client: Okay, but still, you would have some idea, right?

Me: It might get done in 3 days or may take even 30.

After 3 days:

Client: But you said that it will be done in 3 days. Now you are saying there MVP is not ready. Do you even know, your part is the most critical one in the project. We believed in you. We trusted you. This is insane. It was a wrong decision to choose you.

Me (in my head): Didn't I say, this is the first time I am trying to scrape Coles? It might take time?

Me (in actual): I understand, it is getting delayed. Am trying to get this up ASAP....

Anyone else experienced toxic clients but still didn't lose their cool?

So today my pr needed approval. One of the lines of code created a unique ID using the uuid4 functionality.
I got a reject saying I didn't handle a case where I would get the same uuid twice.
Well, I guess it would be the problem of the developer working on my code in a couple thousands of years 🤷‍♂️

We recently had an error in legacy systems about a user trying to find photographers in Virginia but somehow it shows photographers in Mexico. Apparently it's because both Mexico and Virginia have the same zip code XD guess whatever it uses to search stuff didn't think the company would be used past the US.

I have adhd and anxiety which means I cant smoke, drink coffee or drink alcohol because that fucks up my sleep and short term and long term memory badly for few days in a row. ADD symptoms become unmanageable. Fuck my life. I guess I will have to cut all stimulants if I want to be abe to function as a decent dev. I will have to cut most of my social circle because they wont understand me not going out for drinks... Fuck my life....

Fuck, every time I read something about NFTs I lose another bit of faith in humanity I didn't even know I had.

I mean, I guess someone could make a bunch of cartoon characters (lets say, some sort of "pookey-man") using compatible styles and colour palettes. And I guess you could buy some of those if there is a product that makes trademark recognition a plausible dream (let's say, a videogame and/or anime).

But if the chance of success is akin to the chance of becoming a billionaire solemly from lottery wins, shouldn't the assets be priced accordingly?
Like a couple bucks a pop, at most?

Dropping a cool 30000 quid on a single lotto ticket sounds like the dumbest thing ever.
And yet at least a couple hundred hollow heads did it.
Fuck everything.

sprint started two weeks ago, it's due today.

yesterday, most tasks for the sprint were done, but was still waiting that whole two weeks for updates on two new tickets, guess they'll be in the next sprint...

project leaders yesterday: oh here are those updates for the sprint! (not to mention the meeting was at 5 PM yesterday, not even the BEGINNING of the work day)

project leaders today: what's the status of the sprint?!

...it's a joke, right? do you think I'm a fucking magician?

its always the same no matter where you go, slowly starting to realize...

tl;dr; adding new feature requests the day before a sprint ends and then having the nerve of asking the "status" of the sprint the following day.

Well just blew up a coding interview.

Got an offer to be a Drupal dev and was expecting questions on Drupal API and module dev but got asked how to find the closest Enemy in an array and blah blah blah.

Interesting question but man. My mind got blank and got nervous. It's been a while since I've done a question like that and I've been coding for 10+ years.

I would've love to solve that in another language such as Python or C++ but got stuck on PHP because it was a Drupal position. But I only use PHP for Drupal modules and templates who are highly dependant on Drupal API. Or even WordPress plugins. But I try to avoid WordPress because is shit.

Guess the job market hasn't changed since I graduated back in 2014. So I feel a little bummed down. But I guess I'll just have to practice those type of problems as well. At least the problem solving method.

At least it will be an excuse to do those leetcode problems.

My manager has explained in detail to me how to fix the problem I'm having. I know how to fix the problem. I just don't have permission on our servers to change the settings I need to.

Guess who does?

Guess what came today :D

Guess I reached 15 ++'s

Seriously, at what point did the good, kind, selfless souls who write tutorials and guides online turn into fucking food bloggers?

I've been an engineer about 15 years, so I still have to google most of the code I write as I write it, and this week I've been learning a new framework.

Ten years ago it'd be "here's how to..." then the thing you want to do.

Now it's "For the longest time, I didn't want to use Gradle..." followed by a summary of the last week in their life.

I really don't care about your Journey with Rust, I want to know how to define an optional parameter. I don't give a rat's fucking dick how much faster this is than that, my hands are tied by whoever started this mess - just tell me how to make it work.

I guess there's something to be said for remembering things between sessions.

Was fixing a bug and suddenly got an error that the lodash library could not be loaded. Funny, didn't even know the project used that lib. Looked for the reference and the previous dev used _.times instead of a for loop. Ha okay, interesting. Wonder where else this library is used.
Searched the whole project for references, dependencies, whatever, any sign of it. Fucking. Nothing.
Rewrote the _.times part as a simple for loop, then removed the library. The rest of the project still worked perfectly. Took me about a minute and a half.
Who the fuck uses an entire damn library to... Not write a for loop I guess?!

It works locally, it works in Dev, it works in Test, but fails to deploy in UAT. Is it a data issue? I don't know, I don't have permissions to see the UAT database. Literally all I know is that this API is returning 500 instead of what it's supposed to return, but only sometimes.

Guess I'll sit here all day and try to solve the problem telepathically as there is literally no way of troubleshooting other than scrolling through the code and hoping that a cartoon lightbulb appears above my head.

Ah, another day, another regression found in a major library

guess i work for all these companies as a volunteer

🤦‍♂️

good thing i'm no where near their 6 figure salaries either.

maybe i should get that 6 figure salary and then eat more salads and steaks at the free food court, type more shitty code on couches, and play more foosball during my approximate 4 hour work day to acheive their software levels

if only i was so good

I keep seeing comments like “This should be on spotify” under youtube videos. Guess what — I download them with youtube to mp3 converter, drag n drop them into apple music, and boom, it syncs to my phone. They live among apple music-native tracks. They don’t eat up icloud space (I don’t use icloud), and they don’t disappear when apple music subscription expires. I don’t know any music streaming service that has everything in hi-res or lossless and allows that.

Programming has given me an insight into the inner workings of the system that defines every aspect of the modern world. I will never ever be able to look the same way at a game, website, elevator, microwave, the synced traffic lights in a city or really anything that resembles mathematical structure and was built after 1990. Seeing how my friends appreciate all these for their function I often feel like I'm missing out, but I guess they feel the same when the machines don't act as expected.

My family had no particular reaction. I wanted to be a programmer since school, and they knew it was my intended goal.
I guess, my uncle being a professional programmer was something that showed it is a good choice.

Somehow I enjoy creating flawlessly working nifty utilities a lot more than writing actual business code.

It's that versatility and reusability of a well-written utility that makes it suitable for many use-cases that puts a smile on my face.

A single-purpose business and use-case-specific piece of code doesn't do it for me anymore. I guess it never did, really...

I wish I could get paid for building tools rather than business apps :)

It's dangerous to be curious. And have time to spare.

This morning I was in THAT state and decided to spin up kubernetes inside an... Alpine docker container.

The day has almost passed and I think I'll have enough tinkering left for the night.

yay........... I guess...

It's 11 pm / 23:00 Uhr. I knew that i need to give a presentation tomorrow since like a month.

But guess who started working on this presentation a few hours ago and is not nearly at the end ( well my nerves are)

YOU GUESSED IT: ME🤡

OH AND MAYBE I'M STILL PROCRASTINATING EVEN THOUGH I WANT SOME SLEEP

Security in defense is a joke.

New hire does not have accts set up told him over and over!

He decides to go into a classified area and just try. Common last name with first initial.

Guess what he was able to get in because no one changed the default password!

Yep now someone with an interim clearance got access to a machine that goes from unclass to secret and then top secret!

You see that, over there?

That massive, 10-ton bag of dicks sitting there in the corner?

Secure Code Warrior can eat that ENTIRE FUCKING THING!

SO many flaws in their tests... SO much HIGHLY questionable content... utterly RIDICULOUS bullshit code with no comments and no context... asking me fucking Angular questions when I'm doing an Express test... two answers that are IDENTICAL... and a busted-ass site on top of it all.

I hate this motherfucking bullshit SO much, and at this moment I hate my employer even more for forcing me to deal with it.

But, hey, I hope you enjoy no work getting done today since you seem to prefer I do this instead, so I guess I'll just scare my dog some more as I yell about this bullshit.

Fuck you Secure Code Warrior, fuck you very, VERY much.

I mean, ONE of these days, the Prod pipeline has GOT to work... doesn't it?? Just basic odds say EVENTUALLY it will, doesn't it??

Of course, I'm sure I could have had it working long ago if not for the fact that we have to use common scripts developed by another team that we can't alter, and just guess where the problem is.

You know, standardization and DRY are good principles generally, but if you just apply them without thinking and without at least SOME flexibility, you only make matters worse.

guess we'll never know

Had to fire two good developers and a decent QA engineer due to financial reasons in the company :(
That was the painful part, but moreover GUESS WHO'S GONNA GET MORE RESPONSABILITY FOR THE SAME WAGE?!

So long and thanks for all the fish. I'll see you in valhalla

The current project I'm working with had 3 devs including myself until Jan 1st. Now we're only two, because our lead/manager started to work in other projects and trusted us.

Since that happened, my first PR/Commit of the year was in Jan 5, and it's still open, without any kind of review or comment, as well as my other five (eight in about a day) PRs, while he's making commits directly into develop/main branch, causing conflicts everywhere on what I did...

I'm leaving on friday because the contract is ending.

Good luck I guess.

It's weird and scary how fragile we humans are. Somedays, I'm well collected, I know my worth, I contribute to generate some value and some other days, I feel like a complete loser, can't contain a thought in my head, can barely function properly, ...

I guess having emotions and being emotional is normal for humans?

"Let me just quickly clean up the old stashes since everything is merged and I won't need them... "

Guess what, I needed that stash, and I had it saved 20 minutes ago.

Why is planning so awful at so many tech companies (and in general I guess)?

I’m barely a month in and already having to drop current projects because someone made a promise to someone else and realized at the last minute “wait we need infrastructure for this” and came to me out of nowhere “hey we need this super complicated pipeline and complex architecture built”

I ask boss about how this should fall in priority, he basically says “figure it out”. Okay….thanks.

I ask for the business case from the requesters and when they need it and I’m told “we’re going live in late September”

Go back to boss, tell him what I “figured out” and asked if this was something he intended for me to take on. He skimmed through the ticket and gave a non-committal “I’m not sure what this is”. I’m still trying to figure out the infra here, still haven’t gotten access to half the things linked in the JIRA, but there’s been about 3 email chains and a Director recently DM’d me on slack asking for an update.

So I guess I’m flying in the dark on this one.

If you never hear from me again in this community I probably flew into the side of a mountain or something. This new job ain’t it.

so current elon - Twitter situation is like this:

EM - i will buy this company for 44B

Twitter: what!? 44B for this crap? our ESOPs will make us millionaires! sure , go ahead.

EM - Sike!! i was kidding. no deal

Twitter - NO BACKSIES!!! *sues*

EM - ugh, okay. i will buy this company, but i want full ROI in next 5 years + 50% of you are fired

Twitter - Whaaa!!!

----
i guess some disaster was expected from this takeover and twitter mgmt throwed themselves on the axe on their own.

but it's wierd why every CEO change comes with an immediate firing of staff

Ahh, Unity’s “Wheel Joint.” Who knew it had “polarity.” I spent good several f*<king hours debugging this $h!+ just to find out I just placed them backwards on a 2-D car. Instead of the joint turning the wheels, they were trying to “turn the chassis.”
This meant the chassis received an impossible force which would rip it in half in real life. Of course, this was a unity game, so what happened instead was the physics engine flipping out which sent the car into the air!
I guess it was good for some lulz, but it took way too long to debug. I guess it’s time to take a little time off of that project.

Just compleeeetteellyy messed up a technical interview.. stupid theory.. I can apply all that stuff but when I get asked to explain then . Well.. I messed up.

And the coding part, I had the right approach but had one big brainfart in it making the whole thing useless (pseudo code so couldnt test it). I realized just after the interview was finished..

I hate the feeling of failure.
Was a really nice position which is why I applied. Ah well, tonight is whiskey night I guess.

Me: I just know there's gotta be a better way to do this.
PM: No I think it's just a problem of inexperience. You and $coworker just haven't spent enough time in WordPress.
Me: no you're right. I'm just trying to get a better handle on the code and make things as less error prone as possible.
PM: well we really don't have very many errors.
Me: wait, what about the (list off other issues)?
PM: those all have been resolved already.
Me: Oh. Ok. I guess it's just me.
PM: See, I make changes and nothing breaks. You guys just need to continue working on this.
Me: ... 🤨
Me: (weird flex but ok) hey! Look at this guy over here!
PM: (Laughs)

I hate feeling both competent and incompetent at exactly the same time it’s confusing.

I both feel like a reasonably proficient developer and doubt and second guess every decision that I make.

It’s exhausting.

Hot tip: if you are a company, don’t ever ever ever ever spend your money on an Optimizely academy course. They have the worst course material I have ever seen in my life, and the material is outdated by several years from exercise to exercise. And the training videos are literally just a recording of a live class with a couple students. They should pay me to sit through this fucking shitshow. It is not worth a single cent, but guess how much they charge for the course and certification?!?! $2300 😱🫣😂. It’s so fucking bad I want to kill myself. Whoever decided to pour as little effort into this as possible over at Optimizely, I hereby curse you to a 2300 painful deaths and I hope someone shoves a ice cold rod up your ass to wake you up. *slams keyboard*

GitHub and slack are both down. Guess I get a 4 day weekend 🤷🏻‍♂️

More a call for discussion...

How can it be that devs constantly whine about technical debt, how everything is "ancient" bla bla bla...

Yet don't want to update libraries / stuff unless one explicitly rams an klingon pain stick up their arse because one is very very very very tired of lame excuses.

Even better example - and reason for the rant - new microservice.

They honestly started with JDK 8.

Looking at the dependencies is like walking in a museum...

OWasp Dependency check?

Lot's of 7.5s and greater (NVD score).

How brain fucked ignorant can one team be?!!!

Let alone that that thing - despite being just a skeleton project - has already 178 dependencies.

I don't want to look at the build files, I'll guess I'd turn to Freddy Krueger otherwise...

But really - why whining all the time like you have a clit / arsehole full of sand and then starting a new project with an obviously copy pasted graveyard skeleton?!

If it weren't for poor documentation I'd be retired by now.

We didn't all write your library. In fact, only you did. So, some helpful documentation would really help us all out. Can't believe the number of times I need to read source code to figure out what the hell you are doing.

senior IC role, 4 days/week, 5 hours/day, 6 weeks PTO, 99% remote, flexible hours, pays ~75% (full time) market rate

I am very grateful to have a boss that is enabling this.

One day I had a thought. (Dangerous, I know.) What if I could build a machine that took me up into the air and decoupled my inertia from the rotation of the Earth. So I would cease to move in sync with the Earth's rotation. Then I thought this could be a way to travel around the Earth. I wanted to know how long it would take to go around the Earth. So I got the circumference of the Earth and divided it by the surface speed of the Earth. I was really excited at this point.

40075 km ÷ 1670 km/hr = 23.997 hours

Oh ... yeah ... 24 hours. I guess the math checks out.

And this is why we need dev ducks.

Just lost hours of work because the winforms designer decided to send half my elements to (11, -8000) and resize others to (0,0). No matter what I did, there was no moving them back. And every change I made was reverted by some unknown mechanism.

Thankfully, I still have the user controls I built. But I still have to rewire 3k lines worth of form events.

as much as i complain about work, I'm glad i have great colleagues in my team. they're a blast and they make this shitty job worthwhile. I've never been the type to make friends with coworkers, but they're really great people. i guess I'm really lucky

FUCK YOU to all the platforms abandoning OpenGL.
FUCK YOU MICROSOFT! (defaults opengl 1.1)
FUCK YOU APPLE!

I guess we are moving steadily towards Vulkan.
Is Apple even going to support that?
FUCK YOU APPLE!

And an extra FUCK YOU APPLE! just because they are dicks in general.
Don't think I forgot Microsoft's dickishness: FUCK YOU MICROSOFT!

1000

Shit I missed my first 1000, shh
I totally posted this exactly at
1000, nobody saw anything!

So if I calculated that correctly
it will JUST take me 18 more
months for the next digit . .

(((╹д╹;)))

This and Road Rash and Windows 95 and accidentally deleting the soundcard driver to make space for Rollercoaster Tycoon.

I was introduced to an Oracle dba working for one of the companies licensed for them

I was just starting out a few years in
Was using MySQL and dotnet to develop our system

Cost effective

Bastard gives me a kind of smirking smile after talking about basically representing a fucking catalog of use cases no real development and says "it just takes more to get this position"

Few years later oracle buys MySQL , the product he smirked about

Guess their system was really only good for Wal fucking Mart

Burn in hell oracle !

"Please move the logo left. The text goes a bit under."

Do you guys think people realize how unclear they are, and are just too fucking lazy to write the full spec? Or are they just so fucking stupid they don't realize I literally have no fucking clue what to do exactly with comments like these?

I guess Hanlon's razor applies here, but some days I just don't know...

Happy Friday! ☠️

I guess I’m posting memes now

Today is the release of one of the projects I’ve been working on. It was a chaotic project, where I’ve had to contact many people just to get pieces of information necessary to complete the project. Anyway, today the manager ask what the URL of the web app is to give it to the client except I already warned him prior that since we don’t have the domain name for the web app it wouldn’t go past the authentication. But guess what happened? Yep that’s right it’s my fault yet again.

I keep warning my manager about potential issues with the projects I’m working on but they fall on deaf ears, and when the actual problem happens it’s all my fault because I didn’t check it earlier, I didn’t make a mail, I shouldn’t use Teams to tell him about it, I should monitor more closely, etc, despite having no time allocated whatsoever.

In short I work 7 hours a day but should have 9 to even get close to what I need to do, and I’m blamed with problems that I warn about

Build times are kinda long. Guess I'll waste some time on here in the mean time...

I don't have a Computer Science (CS) degree, but I do know a lot of Computer Shit. Major Computer Shit. So yeah, I guess I major in CS after all.

OMFG, Dell, why can't you be normal and make your batteries die like any other batteries - by simply switching the laptop off immediately when the charger is unplugged???

Guess what it looks like when a JD25G (XPS13 9530) battery is dying (still 88% health)!

Constant screen flickering (yes, even in BIOS). Good thing I'm not an epileptic - my screen is fucking strobing!!!

I know it's a battery, because I had the same issue some years ago when I replaced the died original one with a cheapo made by GreenCell. Boi that was fun - I saw my laptop do miraculous things I never would've thought of! Screen flickering was one of them. As soon as I replaced that turd with an original one all these magic powers went away.

Salesforce lightning web components have such bullshit limitations that they claim is because of security but it's just because it's overengineered garbage.

Want to use web components? Nope.

Want to pass in a value to a function in a click listener expression? Nope.

Want to use scss? Nope, compile it to css yourself.

Want to use the fucking document object? Guess what it's overridden except for very specific third party frameworks.

Who in the fuck thought it was a good idea to override the document object? Your app isn't more secure, literally the entire internet uses the document object and it still becomes available in runtime anyway so what the fuck??

LWC is the biggest garbage I've ever seen, you know a framework's a big red flag when there are developers solely for the framework.

There is a new security release coming out that apparently removes some of these nuances (understatement) so there might be some light at the end of the tunnel.

Gotta make a bullshit deck, not really my job, but I guess it makes a change...

Right-click, save image.

It's a webp file...

...oh just FUCK OFF WEBP YOU F-oh, actually, I'm making this in Google Slides. That's literally their own format! I'll just save these as webp, no need to worry.

(ten minutes and lots of saving later)

Drag a webp file into Google Slides, in Google Chrome:

"Sorry, this format is not supported."

Even your parents hate you, webp. Time to have a nice bath with a bar heater, webp.

I will never rant enough about Windows. It is so aged. I have 6TB of storage, 2 SSD of 1To and 1 HDD of 6TB

But windows doesn’t care, it will pack everything in the same disk in this damned AppData no matter where you install your softwares, making main disk full.

Wanted to build a rather big docker image, but yeah, because I guess that the guys from Docker have other things to do than caring of a 90s OS with a fancy UI, they use an emulated ext4 file system, it filled my disk, Docker is crashing because of that, letting me no other choice than removing the emulated disk.

Last 24 hrs have been fucking bad for me. No electricity for almost 22 hours and the inverter died after 12 hours. The foods gone bad in fridge, have been away from almost everything. My phone was at 10%, luckily power bank saved me but now power bank is almost empty (because mi has a huge battery and power bank was only 75%). Don't know what fucking bad things gonna happen now.

just came out of an interview , totally fucked myself.

it's my first interview in last 6 months, i didn't prepare shit, 30 mins before the interview i was trying to get Hello world in java to work , and this was totally what i expected.

however the interviewer went deep into my domain and only asked Android questions. i wasn't even able to answer them 😅 . fuck am fucking rusted.

i would not hire myself if i were to interview a guy like me XD . but it was fun.
i wanted to get an idea of where i stand and what i should be working upon. i guess i know now, will try to get better

What is wrong with this picture . . .

Let me guess, using regexes in the mousemove event handler isn't a great idea.
How fast are simple regexes, anyway?
I have /^(\d+)(.*)$/, because I want to animate a css property that might have some unit.

Resizing my partitions without backup and moving them between disks.

Never had a failure but i guess it could be risky

My parents didn't care at all. I guess they were just glad that they didn't have to pay for my expenses anymore, which they barely did anyway. Both have worked in physically demanding jobs and were extremely restrictive in the amount of time I could spend with computers.
Fucktards.

This weekend, I have been grinding a lot on leetcode. Even though I am grinding part of me believe that the interview process is broken for relying too much on those questions. I know it's a way to filter but I still think it's broken. But I guess I have no choice since that's how the interviews work .

I guess from now to next 1-2 months I will be busy with leetcode. I also have to read some system design questions.

Fuck, so many things to prepare

Application: *starts w/o any errors*
Me: *closes ~40 tabs in chrome*

took me >2 weeks of poking around in the dark to accidentally guess that I simply didn't need to create a file I thought I needed.

Now I can rest. Finally... Damocles' sword is no longer hanging over my head

I know streams are useful to enable faster per-chunk reading of large files (eg audio/ video), and in Node they can be piped, which also balances memory usage (when done correctly). But suppose I have a large JSON file of 500MB (say from a scraper) that I want to run some string content replacements on. Are streams fit for this kind of purpose? How do you go about altering the JSON file 'chunks' separately when the Buffer.toString of a chunk would probably be invalid partial JSON? I guess I could rephrase as: what is the best way to read large, structured text files (json, html etc), manipulate their contents and write them back (without reading them in memory at once)?

Despite all the code bugs, manager worries, colleagues' annoyances, self pity, low self esteem, constant guilt all the way, we are still alive and kicking

I guess 2022 will be nothing different but I also wish it will be super interesting and satisfying

Wish You And Your Families a Very Happy New Year 2022!

A tool widely use and been perceived as a superset of JavaScript does not have a FUCKING language specification, we have no single clue why certain things are done the way they are done. All we FUCKING do is guess.

Fuck typescript

Guess who just spent the entire day before launch debugging why compose doesn't work on an ec2 instance where I DIDN"T INSTALL FUCKING DOCKER

I guess this is the key difference between me and seniors. Seniors know where to look where shit breaks because they have been breaking it for at least 5 years.

I hate power cuts..

I have an UPS though, so, I don't hate them so much..

Except for ones that last longer than the battery life of the UPS..

Then it means I have to turn off servers..

And guess what, one of them won't turn on again !

I do have a backup server, but it isn't as powerful, and will only cover the basic's..

So, lesson there, always have at least one running spare server as powerful as you need, ready to take over when another server decides its not going to play nice..

This is why I don't like powering things down, ever !

Fucking hell. Typescript is configured to require explicit typing of everything "because sometimes it does weird conversions". But because temporary variables can have weird types used just there (like arrays of various objects), there is a lot of variables typed as any.

That's bad on its own, but whatever. The real kicker is that eslint is set to throw warnings whenever it sees any, "so that people don't just put any on everything". I guess that was a failure...

I asked around and it turns out that TS and eslint were configured by two teams independently that merged when the project was new young, and it sort of stayed that way. No one from the original team is even working in the co panu anymore, yet this clusterfuck still lingers on, and even spreads to every new project that team starts

Incredible that these companies with literally no product, and barely a website (if any) come around offering 100K+ jobs

They have funding out of their ass but literally NO real-world value... it's amazing to me.

Guess it really is not what you can do but who you know.

Meetings entire day. Management/PMs fucked things up and forgot an ENTIRE system. They just spend A YEAR for the requirements. A YEAR!!! Just unbelievable. Guess who has to shoot from the hip just fucking guessing things to fix it before everything should be in production? So sad. I just have to quit this incompetence. Just…incompetence. I know it is complex but to forget an entire eco-system of applications is just beyond idiotic. One whole year and God almighty know how many workshops and business travel expenses. I am fucking distancing myself from this organization. I have no hope. No hope.

What do you guys use for creating the frontend? I guess noone codes the frontend anymore?

I'm a workaholic.
My boss literally told me I've only used 1 PTO day this year and with only 2 weeks left I HAVE to take at least the rest of this week off.

Guess... I'm getting a really long weekend, took tomorrow thru Friday off, Monday and Tuesday are holiday, so only 3 days left of the year after 5 today.

Not taking the last 3 days next week because I don't trust my one co-worker to do end of month/year procedures without me there to verify they didn't fuck up anything.

Now I just have to get through that time stressing about things I'm responsible for breaking while I'm not there.

I am just so tired these days and find it extremely hard to work at all, let alone on the tasks I'm supposed to work on. I spend a lot of time distracting myself compulsively instead, even off work.

I have a vacation planned soon, but I do need to finish an important project before that (which I have been procrastinating on for the last 2 weeks).

These days I often feel like quitting tech altogether or at least taking an extended break.

Tried bumble. It was lame. It would not let me make a profile without a photo. Supplied a rough drawing of myself. It felt betrayed so it nagged constantly about a photo even while I was trying to delete the damn app.

I do absolutely hate when apps feel entitled to my info. Like, it's okay to ask, but I also feel better about deleting your app than downloading it. Fair is fair I guess. But also... It's not fair that these lame apps get so much revenue either.

So what other apps should I try for finding friends locally?

Why the fuck is every tech lead and manager obsessed with the idea of breaking down tasks?
It's true some tasks can be broken down into smaller ones. But there are situations where a task needs to be done by 1 person in X days. Breaking it down into 2-3 tasks so that "they can be done in parallel" actually requires more efforts among devs, introducing unnecessary complexity and more risks.
9 women cannot deliver a baby in 1 months ffs. I guess these people never learn.

Me walking down the corridors of my building after hours, singing full on out loud (I can actually sing)

Lyrics(by yours truly homage to Mika)
I wanna talk to you!
The last time we talked, Mr. Smith, you reduced me to tears
I promise you it won't happen again!
Do I attract you? Do I repulse you with my queasy smile?
Am I too dirty? Am I too flirty? Do I like what you like?
I could be wholesome, I could be loathsome, I guess I'm a little bit shy
Why don't you like me? Why don't you like me without making me try?

Some voice at the other side of the building: "who is there singing???!"

Me:
"I tried to be like Grace Kelly!!"
"but all her looks are too sad"
"so I tried a little Freddy MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM"
"I've gone identity maaaaaaaaaaaad"

then I walked inside of my office and stopped spooking the janitors. Really wish someone would join in and helped me sing the high note parts of the song really. I've got no audience here smfh

I was refactoring a 4000 lines JavaScript file, turning whatever I could into components. It was a pretty old project that I ended up being one of the few wizards to actually know how most of it works.

At one point, I noticed that login into a user account redirected us to the dev-test server, even when working on a local Docker container.

I never quite understood the issue, but ended up having the bug mysteriously disappear.

Until it came back two months later, then disappeared again.

At one point, all of the dev team on the project (four developers, me included, and one project manager) was investigating the issue, and we never figured out how or why this was happening.

Just Symfony routes shenanigans I guess.

#Story time.
Been working on a project for 2 months with Colleague "Jim" doing the code reviews. Project is finished in a stable form and can be extended if needed. Then my other colleague/boss "Mo" decided that we need to do a refactor. Fast forward a bit and the conclusion is "Mo" and "Jim" are going to discuss every step with me. And we started a new project that should do the same as the project I just finished

Here some facts:
Every day a meeting/ code review / discussion.
Decisions they make I do not agree with.
I need to redo my work multiple times.

Now this does make me look like a toddler that needs supervision which is not the case.
They want something future proof and something that fits his new coding standard "Mo". and certain things I do agree with and is clearly the better architecture. however somethings are just stupid, time wasting, making it worse. I'm getting so frustrated by the fact that billion dollar companies have clear coding standards that work. and are correct. and this company decided to do their own thing of stupid rules!

- shorten variables
- Keep lines under 90char
- put multiple things in 1 file
- Keep function names short
and many more of removing stuff and let you guess stuff..

I just... *sigh* get so tired of this shit.

*names are randomly chosen

i guess im learning COBOL now..
didn't even know, this language still exists, and is alive until the Lead of the Department came around and asked me if i know that language, because they have a potential customer Project.

Others said, i shouldn't do it, but i'm also curious.

At the very least i will check it out 🦕

Infrastructure took away our read access in S3 to data that we own and our ability to manually delete/upload to S3 in that prefix (which we own). Without waiting for us to confirm that we have alternative means to read and change what is in there. And I had no warning about this, so here I am doing a midnight mod on an existing solution of mine in hopes that I can finish it before tomorrow morning for some legal reporting deadline.

Things would be so much easier if the infrastructure team let the emergency support role have those permissions for emergencies like this, but they didn't. I guess "least privilege" means "most time spent trying to accomplish the most trivial of things, like changing a file".

Nearing the end of the year, and all I'm thinking is that I'm just making bad decisions left and right. And these are like long term decisions, that don't show results until much later.
It's making me really depressed and it's not good.
There are a bunch of should haves all littered throughout the past 3 months and it's really fucking with me.

I often wonder why JS is the only language that has the native support from browsers and native built in DOM apis?
The world has come up to a saturation point for so many techs:
- if a software is needed to be created for mobile, it must go through 1 layer of java (aka JVM) or objective C (i guess? for ios) before being understood by the CPU

- if a software is needed to be run via browser( which itself is made to run on jvm, objective c or machine language), it must go through one layer of js interpretters before being understood by the CPU

all the OS are made on C but the application and application platforms are made on specific languages. I wonder why can't there be a single application platform, if all of them(browser, JVM,objective C and whatever .exe apps run on) are doing the same thing and are equally mature to handle every usecase?

I've said this before, but i always get the spot I'm hoping for. there was one time i got rejected though.
i met a colleague during the interview process, and really thought he was getting that spot, he was much more qualified than the other participants. there was about another 4, out of which 3 still looked like good competition. the 4th one got there late, couldn't form a coherent sentence to save his life and had no job experience.

guess who they picked :v

First preload game, takes a few days to download..

Great, I get to play when it launches !

Patch first..

That takes a few days to download..

Great, I get to play it !

Doesn't even launch..

Well, they sure tested the hell out of that then !

Guess I wait for the next patch..

Finally got my first dev job. I am looking at the code base for my company. And it’s like I know how to code in this language. But I don’t know half of the advanced shit they’re doing. I understand they have more experience than me. But I’m just not sure how to catch up to them. Or be even on the same level as them? I guess just more out of office learning?

I can read what they’re putting in the code and understand how it works. But like how they came up with it I have no clue. I guess I’ll learn over time and have to put in some extra man hours.

A year since the Group Manager stepped into the position, 4 team leads have moved to other companies.
He is known to be politician/manipulative..

Guess what, Now there's a new Team Lead position and I was offered it.

It will be a step up for me, from senior engineer, and in other circumstances I would take the job in a heartbeat.

I guess it is not the time to step into leadership role.

What would you do?

Seems no matter how much I earn I'm always fucked for money. Guess I'm shit financially, even though I live in the worst area in the worst flat

Have a question about raises.

Working in europe as a junior dev (had 2.5 year experience prior) but lowballed myself (because I had a 1.5 year gap from development) and started working here for 2.5k euro/month salary.

After my 3 months probation I noticed that Im doing better than 60% of my team and as soon as my probation ended I messaged my manager and asked for a raise to bump me up to 3.5k/month.

I am waiting for a raise for the past 7 weeks already. My manager keeps telling me that decision is greenlighted because I got very strong and positive feedback. However CTO is on vacation, once he comes back manager will be on vacation and so on. Basically a corporate clusterfuck.

So basically I will have my raise request approved what? 8 weeks after my original request? Also add a couple more weeks because I guess new contract will be signed from the beginning of next month, not retrospectively. So when I will actually get that increased salary? What the hell.

Since my original request havent even reached CTO yet Im thinking of amending my original request and asking for a bump up to 4k or quit the company and go contracting for the same 4k and pay 17 percent for taxes instead being employed fulltime while paying around 43% for taxes.

I am just pissed off that its taking 2 months to just get the 'okay' and I guess will take 3 more weeks to sign the new contract. It shouldnt be like that, I lost money while waiting so I think it would be fair enough to ask for a bigger bump.

Noticed a running process called geoclue. Wanted to kill it but xdg uses it. Went down the rabbit hole, and guess what? Flatpak is the mother of all dinosaurs. Busy enough that I can't care, but like... Really, flatpak? ReAlLy???

With Atom being discontinued I guess I have to start looking for a new IDE.

Visual Studio Code seems to be #1 choice.

I don't get why.

1. Search
It pops up in the small side bar. Can't see which of the findings I am actually interested in.

2. Open file in Solution Explorer
Found the shortcut to open SE after my failed search. Trying to navigate files with keyboard. Enter does not open the file. Neither does CMD+Enter, Option+Enter or Shift+Enter, but CTRL+Enter does! In a new tab which only covers *half* of the window! Wtf.

My JIRA fanatic manager: log whatever you do during the day, even the smallest things are important. and you have all the material needed for next day's standup meet.

me, on a particular tuesday:
had lunch
peed thrice
bitched about an unreasonable bug raised by the testing team
listened to Rihanna's song Diamonds
had four mugs of coffee
, among various other things.

next day.
manager: so, ssup?
me: eh, didn't do much yesterday. was one of those down days I guess.

Guess who was asked to write "didn't do much yesterday" on all the JIRA tickets assigned to him?

Curious to see if anyone else is in this situation: I somehow have become the “infrastructure upgrade guy”. I’m in this constant loop of retrofitting our applications to work with the latest Windows Version or Java Middleware. Or, I’m stuck porting apps from one middleware to another. I guess I got good at this, and now I’m stuck in this constant loop of being the “go to” for all system upgrades/ports, which seem to just be in this endless cycle. It gets me a lot of recognition, but the work is miserable. Anyone else experience something like this, and if so, how did you get out?

I don't know how to do what I'm thinking, and I can feel the impulsive, curious part of my brain preparing to spend hours reading, testing, and researching things.

Guess it's gonna be another all nighter. And it's only Monday.

My current dev dream is to move away from JS based hybrid mobile development...

Guess I need to get back to learning Dart and Flutter hey? (: Because, well, fuck Cordova.. fuck it with `rusty-barge-pole.js`.

when a senior recommends you rewrite some code with their example snippet (which doesn't work), for the 3rd time, on a different ticket

i guess i should've called them out on the 2nd time this happened, instead of silently not doing so think i'd save them some dignity after telling them the first time they did this, their recommendation didn't pass automated tests