Someone at Google: how do we make Android build times quicker?

Someone else at Google: we could make a new button next to Run and call it 'Instant Run' and give it an awesome lighting bolt icon!

First someone: what will it do differently?

Second someone: nothing 😎

Every time when I have nothing to do...

Production is down

Me to Customer :What did you do?
Customer: Nothing
Me blurt out: The fuck you didn't!
Customer: ...
Me: ...(fuckfuckfuck)
Customer:... Well, I did run these scripts..
Me: (oh thank Christ)
Me: ok, I'll get right on it (Click)
Me to TeamLead: client called. Their prod is down!
TeamMate: did he say he didn't do anything?
Me:Yes
TeamMate: ..... Every fucking time...

"I don't care if the government spies on me, I have nothing (criminal) to hide."

Uhm... but... if you have nothing criminal to hide.... then why'd they have to spy on you/collect your data...?

After all you didn't do anything illegal...

School holidays be like:

"Yea! I finally have time to do projects that I like!"

When school starts again:

"How dafuq did I manage to do absolutely nothing in the past month?!?!"

Internet is down at work, I love being paid to do nothing 😏

Got to learn Shopware (the eCommerce thingy written in PHP) for the job.

Bought a book worth ~60$.

The author writes: "Use vagrant it's soooooo comfy and cozy and everything!".

Sure, why not.

Got to get online over my smartphone.

Cloned the repo with the Vagrantfile.

Did a 'vagrant up'.

Downloaded the Ubuntu box of around 1.5 GB (reminder: over my smartphone which has around 3 GB 'highspeed' internet connection).

Vagrant initialized and provisioned the box.

Error.

Error?

Error.

VT-X is not enabled. Hm. Strange. Wait...when it's not enabled, can it be that...

Yep.

THIS SHITTY LAPTOP SCHMAPTOP DOES NOT SUPPORT VT-X AND I PULVERIZED JUST THE HALF OF MY INTERNET DATA FOR THIS SHITTY BOX IN ORDER TO JUST DOWNLOAD THE ZIP FILE AND INSTALL IT OLDSCHOOL-SCHMOLDSCHOOL INSTALL A APACHE VIRTUAL HOST.

Time for new hardware I think.

the oscillation between the urge to do nothing and the urge to do everything

Fuckin hell!!

Code works everywhere except at one client. Ok, I check logs & see something missing.. I go check the code that handles excel files.. try catch and do nothing.. great.. :/ ok let's log this shit to see what is not ok...
Insert logs, build, update, run.. now it freakin works o.O

Today I asked my client to do "ctrl+f5" to empty browser cache he literally did "ctrl+f+5" and said "it did nothing"

I now feel like a hacker.
Double tap a comment or rant to upvote.
But when you already upvoted, rants will open but comments will do nothing.
Just found out, am I just the one who didn't knew this? Tell me in the comments below!

!rant && sarcasm

For a long time now I've been trying to convince people to use secure communication. I'm used to getting called "paranoid", but the killer phrase always was (and still is): "Why do you want me to encrypt my communication, I HAVE NOTHING TO HIDE, so I don't care who's reading it" - "It's not about hiding something, it's about private stuff staying private" - "Yeah, whatever"

"I have nothing to hide". That always killed the conversation... until I asked them to hand me their phones, unlocked, for 5 minutes.

"No" - "Why? I thought, you had nothing to hide and don't care who's reading it?" - "Uhmmm..."

More and more people around me are popping up in my Signal contact list.
Looks like they suddenly care a lot about private stuff staying private </sarcasm>

Security for 2017: Because SSL has nothing to do with security, and just Google's way of increasing it's monopoly...

You know scrum is working when the dev team are feeling that scrum isn't working because they have nothing to do because the product team can't keep up with the pace.

I bought a raspberry pi a while back, and I have no idea what to do with it. I know nothing about electrical engineering or Python (as I believe that's the language you use to program the pi). Any ideas?

You know you have been using devrant too much when you open it and the algo only gives you rants that you already ++'ed.

The moment when mall has wifi speakers all around, and i have nothing to do, so i change the christmass music to Dual Core - All the things

So I started working at this IT company here in Oslo. Norway. After almost 6 months, I have almost not had anything to do, except little over just 1 month where I actually worked on a project, and now that is done. I have nothing to do, so today I applied for 11 jobs.

How to look like a wizard by doing pretty much nothing.

Open inspect element infront of people who cant program, and do something. They'll think you're a genius for changing a picture.

When I tell novice undergrads that JavaScript has nothing to do with Java and it was actually supposed to complement Java...

After deciding to do what I love every day nothing feels like work any more, because continuous change and improvement is what I live for.

That is all. ✌🏼

Christmas eve!

Challenging myself to write an automatic youtube-music-library updating script/engine within an evening/night.

'you should be with your loved ones!" - I'm nearly always home alone during at least the first Christmas day doing nothing than what I do every workday so I'm all good.

Are we just programmed to stay awake all night? Even if we have nothing to do?

Like, it's 4 a.m. in my country and I just can't fucking sleep! What is this?!

Man it's midnight and all I want to do is work. 5 hours from now I'll be dragging out of bed to go to work where nothing gets accomplished. In 17 hours when I drag in from work I can do real work for 7 hours before crashing while wishing I could just code through the night. It's an infinite loop and I dont know how to fix it!

YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT!

I have nothing against teaching and showing someone starting in this field how to do things but FOR FUCKS SAKE, PUT INTEREST IN IT, I WON'T DO YOUR FUCKING JOB, I HAVE MY JOB, YO DO YOURS.

Jesus...fucking Christ, these kind of people always get on my nerves.

Kinda tired of people telling me that I'm "wrong" for using PHP. There's nothing inherently wrong with PHP. Any language is only as good as the developer using it, and so long as you're comfortable using it and it does what you need it to do, there's no shame in using ANY programming language. Don't let the these cocky "bro"grammers tell you how to do your job.

"How do you make an app?"
The most difficult answer to explain to someone that knows nothing about code.

I told colleagues that I had little to do before Christmas... half an hour later, one of our (whackiest) senior devs stands before me, holding out a Rubiks Cube. " I heard you have nothing to do, solve this!" >.< xD

i am a procrastinating asshole. woke up at 7am to do some work, and still, 5 hours later - nothing! i am so pissed of at myself right now. i just want to jump out of my skin and not be me anymore. fuck.

Dear life,

STOP FUCKING TESTING MY PATIENCE.

I fucking lack it and trying my best to cope up with the shit your throw at me every single god damn day.

Nothing will go right but everything will surely go wrong.

FUCK MURPHY'S LAW.

Do zillion good deeds and nothing good ever happens to you.

Do one bad act and hell breaks down.

There's nothing as Karma. It's pure steaming bullshit made by men to control his own species by fear and hate.

I am just sick of things constantly going wrong and nothing ever good happening around. I am just tired of waiting. I cannot put up with this anymore.

I don't even have enough resources and energy to continue playing this infinity game. Worse is, I cannot even drop out. I am just draining out.

FUCK YOU LIFE, JUST FUCK YOU.

*me teaching someone to code*

Me: So what do you think will happen when we run this?
Student: ummm... I don...🤔
Random: I KNOW! It does xyz 😄
Student: agh yea, it does xyz 😅
Me: (ffs) 😐

Nothing gets learned in the end 😮

I applied for Software Devloper position but was called in for interview for Systems Analyst (IT). Nothing to do with coding. When I mentioned that I applied for Software Developer role, I was told that there is no vacancy for that role then why the fuck did you advertised and fuck the fuck did I apply.

Fuck

No!

I won't fix your printer, and me working on your computer has nothing to do with the fact that you lost all your Facebook friends!

Oh. And while we are at it, your new TV has nothing to do with Gmail looking different!

I have never doubted my abilities more, before this happened:

I got a Linux VM on Azure, downloaded apache httpd source which I proceeded to configure, make and install.

As expected, install failed with something related to apr and apr-util.

Searched several mailing lists, tried out several configure options, nothing worked..

After almost an hour, it stuck to me, all I had to do was "sudo yum install httpd" !!!

Disappointed that I missed something so simple, but when I did that, it came back with 'Nothing to do'...

Realized, httpd was pre-installed in that VM.. I just had to start the service !!!

:facepalm

Wife and I went to visit her grandparents and when we were at the hotel she would watch lifetime and i would code.

As for Christmas, there's nothing else to do in this town so why not code.

that moment as a sys admin when everything is in peace and you have nothing to do.
I usually go outside and get me a nice cup of coffee at a local cafe

today its a Latte Machiato with white chocolate

That awkward moment when you're out and there are so many people around and you have nothing to do. So you take out your phone and browse through the app list and settings... Just browsing and doing nothing. I do that so much. Anyone else like me? 🙈

Why do most Java programmers know Java and nothing else? Wtf, every time find myself reviewing crappy Bash/Python/JavaScript/Ruby shit written by Java-only programmers I want to puke. Don't you know that the world is bigger than your small island?

Nothing makes me cringe more that some dumb fuck jabbing their finger at any computer screen to show me what they’re talking about. DON’T. FUCKING. DO. THAT. What makes you think it’s even remotely good for the displace? Do you see it freak out the way it does, that’s not a good thing. Stop fucking doing that!

Anyone work with other developers who take 3 times as long as you to do things, spend all day talking, get nothing done, so you have to pick up the slack? Fucking annoying.

Guys, does anyone promise himself to work on a personal project on the weekend which he really is excited about working on. Then he ends up having done nothing but play a game or go out?

Like i have this idea that i really wanna make but i just cant get myself to sit down and actually do it. :/

Has nothing to do with programming but I would reboot Firefly

*Sunday evening, nothing to do*

*Reflects upon life and career*

*Decides to take action and make it big because #YOLO*

*Deletes all social apps including devRant*

*Feels good*

*Reflection over*

*Back to reality with nothing to do*

*Gets bored and installs everything back*

*Posts the episode here*

*Feels good*

!rant

It's a non-working holiday at the office so I'm at home doing nothing. I asked my boyfriend what to do for the whole day then he said "Spend your day to something you really enjoy".

Ah yes!

So I'm building a new project. What an exciting day!

'Hello, the program displays an error for this file <file.txt> what to do'

That... Thats the whole email. Nothing more. I made them 4 programs. They didnt even say which one wasnt working.

At work, an idiot who has never worked on machine learning before and understands nothing about it: "You know what, machine learning isn't actually hard. It is just basic statistics and then you download the model online and that's it! There's nothing else you are doing!"

STFU, you moron! Do you think just any model can work for your use case? Do you fucking think it is easy to come up with new architecture for a very specific use case and test it accurately? Do you think it's easy to effectively train a model and do hyper-parameter optimization?Do you fucking think it is easy to retrieve the right data for your use case? Do you think it's easy to keep up with research papers on arXiv being released daily? Do you think this is fucking javascript and there's a framework for everything? Stfu!
Honestly, i hate ignorant morons who generalize stuff they don't clearly understand.

When your school is called technical but nothing is working properly.. And we need to do our final exam on those computers 😐

Nothing like waking up to a text from a good friend, "do you know how to make phone apps?"

Not learning data structures and algorithms. Not learning programming languages. Actually not learning anything to answer during a job interview.

I am more of a learn-while-you-do kind of guy. I never learn anything, instead just do it. Interviewers think I am useless because I know nothing. But I can get a job done, any kind of job done. I have no learning period, I can start working from first day in a all new language, in a all new IDE, in a all new OS.

I know nothing, and I learn nothing. I am a problem solver. You got a problem, I can solve it.

Sooooo.. Aws's route53 and ELB outage nuked all our environments. 503 here, 503 there, 5xx everywhere.

Just sitting and picking nose for we've got nothing else to do now.. Who on the fucking earth thought it might be a great idea to centralize the whole fucking internet into 3 companies' hands!?!

How's your day?

That pure rage when you're off work for a few days, and return to find that someone has been in one of your magnificently neat code files, and taken a syntactic shit! Loads of unnecessary whitespace, tabs all over the place, and copy/pasted comments that have nothing to do with the code! 😫

When you realize that you've been been flipping between two tabs in your browser for the better part of an hour, and they have nothing to do with your project, you need the day to end.

Someone with nothing to do changed everyone’s profile photo on the dev environment. I admit it was pretty funny. Not even the bosses escaped.

Clients always add up:
- The time it took you to create the project.
- Enhancement times.

Client: "How are we still working on this a year later?"

Me: "Well motherfucker, you requested a change recently. It has nothing to do with the original request, nor the last 39 updates."

Like it's my fucking fault you keep changing your mind.

12 days of work, 12 fucking days straight and I meet the Friday deadline for this ridiculous sprint of never ending tasks.

There’s no better feeling then bringing everything together at 5pm on Friday, pushing to Git and waking out that door knowing there’s nothing more to do until Monday’s testing!!!!

Now excuse me while I go sleep my weekend away!

When you get a Slack message from your "PM" letting you know that the boss has another client who wants a website and he's quoted £7500 for it...

With no brief. No scoping. No designs. No mockups. Nothing.

The fuck am I supposed to do here exactly?

I hate dumb ass meetings that have nothing to do with me but people invite me just for the kicks

Do all companies ask candidates to solve some crazy puzzles before interviewing them? These puzzles have nothing to do with the job!

The worst part about pizza sharing is that no one wants to be caught eating the last slice so everyone takes a glimpse of it every now and then.

The post belongs on devrant because pizza is dev main food and because i'm a bit drunk in a pub and got nothing better to do.

What do we have to give you to make you able to accurately predict the scope and length of time it will take you to develop something you know nothing about and have no experience with? How hard could it possibly be? You click a button and BOOM! A unicorn! Please provide estimate in hrs EOD.

Today I learned that DB2 for IBM i doesn't support booleans as a data type.

There's no bits, there's no "tinyint"; nothing...

I... fuck. I don't even know what to do with this information.

No wonder all the past devs used 'Y' and 'N' instead of true/false. Fuck me.

I used to screw around with the school computers, nothing much, a few batch files here, a few html scripts there. But once, they took away my use of the computer for, "Tampering with very important parts of the computer." Yeah.
Don't do html in school, kids.

When you work from home and your same age cousins do nothing to earn, their parents: "It doesn't matter. He (me) works from home, meaning he does nothing too".

Seriously?

Product managers who breathe down your neck all day because they literally have nothing else to do with their time

That moment when you've tried everything and nothing works and the only logical thing left to do is post a question on stackoverflow;
&wait;
&obviously rant on devRant while you wait;

I am feeling useless. :/

Am I the only one that thinks it's annoying when people use the weekly rant in their tags when their rant has nothing to do with the weekly rant?

"OMG PLZ HELP NOBODY CAN CALL ME!!!¡¡ THIZ STUPID PHONE IS SO SHITTY"

Did you press anything?

"NOTHING I SWEAR!"

Yeah, I see that you are messing with the settings. Is that nothing to you?

I can understand that you accidentally navigate to the settings, but if you blame everything on your phone and lie to me, expect me to do the same.

App fails, Check logs...No error logged. Check source code and debug....
And then you see following piece of code....

try{
//Code to hit an API
}catch(Exception ex){
/*DO NOTHING. Not even log stack trace*/
}

I want to propose a toast for al the people who is right now sitting on a shitty meeting listening to shit that has nothing to do with their job

i am actually exciting to go to work tommorow.

Thats weird.

Over the weekend the gf was away and it was quite boring, gaming didnt do the thing so i relaxed quite a lot but i am somewhat excited to continue to work tomorrow, to further my project. I was able to stop to do nothing at home, but still..its a bit weird

It was my first meeting ever at my first job. They booked the room for two hours. During those two hours they drank coffee and talked about life and god.
I sat there for two hours doing nothing. But I was new and didn't dare to ask if I could go and do some work.

When the project manager (who knows nothing about code) tells me how to structure HTML markup. No, please, tell me how to do my job.

So this week we had another team come to us and say they need to go into production...only issue...they have nothing...sorry that's wrong they have something...a vbs script to do their installation which doesn't work...

took me about 6+ months to accept that relational database is better than blockchain. But since i am doing project involving -smartcontract- now, theres nothing i can do but to tell some people that blockchain is a good thing. please forgive me for spreading this technology... after i finish this project, i promise to never step on blockchain environment again

When people keep asking the same kind of questions over and over and you realize it's your fault for always helping them out so they don't learn how to debug on their own.

It's hard to do nothing but in a learning environment it's often the best.

At my balmer's peak and have nothing to work on... what am I supposed to do right now?

Have to do a jee project without any knowledge in java, in 2 weeks.

Why ? My classmates put me in a group when i wasn't here, of course they know nothing and are not going to code..
Fuckkkkkk you!

Well, any advice with jee ? Where should i start to get a good grade x)

What is the most common behavior between Arch users and vegan? 😂😂

I found this comment on a video that had nothing to do with Arch and being vegan

when you really want to code but you have a lot of school work and your course major has nothing to do with computer science or programming. ((

> Have nothing to do with programming
> Starts shitty coding bootcamp online, possibly for free
> Learns html/css/js course
> Builds to-do app (dont know how to deploy it with anything but github pages, but who cares)
> Takes a week to finish course
> Gets e-certificate and posts it on LinkedIn
> Adds web and front end dev as Professional Skill on LinkedIn
.
.
.
> Complains how bad the tech industry is for 'new entries and beginners'

Dear Comcast, why in the flying fuck is it necessary for you to bring down the entire network for five hours to do "routine maintenance." There's nothing routine about that.

13, my boss told me multiple times to leave, but I had to (for myself) fix someones fuck up first otherwise interns had nothing useful to do in the morning.

Got the next morning a few hours off to make up for that time.

Me: "can you please send my credentials for the database?"

Hosting provider: "Yea sure... We will set it up on our servers in no time"

*5 mins later: provider sends mail to me*

Me: *looks at mail*

Also me: *NOTHING TO DO HERE*

Congrats to jweiland.net for not being able to support their customers.

Why the hell do so many Android games require internet? I want to play it in undergound when I have nothing better to do! If I had Internet I could be doing something usefull instead of playing stupid games! Even devRant survives by caching in the stations and doesn't f***ing close whenever I'm offline!

Tfw GitHub app is forcing you to push to master and you do so because you're an idiot, and your agnostic ass starts praying to god(s) nothing goes wrong.

I like reading documentation.

BUT I really hate writing one for a project that I have nothing to do with it.

I am charged to write a documentation just because they think I am good on expressing and structuring ideas.

F_M_L

What do you use YouTube/NewPipe for?

I am using it to fall asleep when nothing else helps. Boring YouTubers are good for such a reason, guys lol.
I use it to do sport, to chill, to game, to be productive, to learn, to have some noise when I am bored (e.g. eating).
Offline music while taking a shower.

So tell me... What do you use it for?

There are two types of people: Doers, and Talkers.

It really annoys me when talkers (who do nothing) ask me to stop doing things because it makes their lack of productivity look bad.

So sorry sweetheart, if you want to look better, just start doing work yourself and then you don't have to worry about my work making you look bad.

Why do broadband providers feel its acceptable to fucking hire people who know fuck all about technology. Called up and said I'm experiencing packet loss even when I'm wired and he ran through a bunch of fucking WiFi related questions that had nothing to do with it. Half an hour later and "okay sir it is fixed for you now" and I drop packets again within five minutes.

Thanks, shitcunt.

Adventures with house IT

I'm currently experimenting with PowerShell but my scripts won't run even though I've got every local permission. The error message indicates it's a GPO problem.
"No problem" le me thinks and calls IT hotline.
After 2 incompetent and unprofessional technicians i've still got no solution. I'm waiting for the second tech to call back because he "needed some time to get to know PowerShell" (he is a trained and certified SysAdmin).
During my call he couldn't decide if it was a GPO problem or not.
And this is just one story of their incompetence...

I was inspired by ADL to show off my first rice. Need to write some conky scripts to make it a little more interesting on the desktop.

Using i3 as the WM, with more or less vanilla i3status. Thinking of switching over to polybar at some point possibly. I used oomox to make my own theme, so nemo, firefox, and all other system applications are matching. Check her out!

Mom: hey I can't get into the phone, the PIN and PUK aren't working. See if you can fix it otherwise you'll have to go to the communications company to ask for a new card (my mom is working and can't do it)
Me: //gives it another try. Doesn't work. Searches online. Yep, can't do anything, it needs a new card
Me: sorry mom, you have to get a new card, there's nothing I can do.
Mom: OK
Me: why did you ask me for help, again?
Mom: well because you can do things and fix things and so, and I thought that maybe you could fix it
Me: 😑

Please help I did nothing for 2 days. How do you stop procrastinating ? Do you often feel so tired that you cant even think but you are not sleepy ? I also need to get rid of the games I can't play anymore that only helps me procrastinate maybe I should go to linux :D .

Just started my first "management" role after 12 years as a developer, first thing I learnt is its just like my last role only I don't have to do any of the hard work.
Worried they'll figure out I'm doing almost nothing soon, any tips? Should I just start scheduling meetings to discuss meetings?

Please stop tagging rants with the weekly rant tag if they have nothing to do with the weekly rant, it makes you look attention hungry.

I'm an intern that is almost never going in class, because I've nothing to learn from this school, learnt today I've a java jee project to do for next week, i actually know nothing about it .

My group to do it ? Me, and a « I'm a manager i do not code »

Got a new excuse for slacking off... DNS propagation... eurghhh

I would make unintelligent customers disappear.

Reason:
What did I do today, one may ask? Spent the entire day debugging code and creating test cases to fix a high priority trouble ticket submitted by the PM of a program.....where nothing was wrong to begin with.
User error makes the world sad.

CNC finished...
Can't do anything else (level it and such) until I get new motors...
the steppers I ordered one month ago returned back to China, FUCKKKKKK
one more month waiting.
So many project ideas.... nothing concrete.
What should I do now? Did my BT controlled car, the CNC, ... Any ideas?

Do you know this:

Sometimes you come in to work develop a little bit and theres nothing to do for the rest of the day. You ask multiple times - still nothing. You have 10 minutes left until you can leave and your boss hits you with "oh dude here is a new project and it has to be done now"... THAT FUCKING SHIT TAKES LIKE 3 HOURS TO BE DONE AND YOU JUST TOLD ME NOW THAT IT HAS TO BE DONE TODAY OMG

Been working from 8 am til 7:30 pm, no breaks. Programming is awesome, fun and feels good in my brain (addictive ^^). But man its good to be home and do nothing. ~ sweet ~

float version = 1.8f
if (version >= 1.8f)
{
/*
Do nothing because you forgot
about floating point precision
you tool...
*/
}

I.. I'm sorry... I'll sacrifice some virtual chickens to appease the Gods.

Nothing breaks a dev's heart more than when you plan to spend your day off programming and work asks you to do a full day .-.

Why must everything cost money .-.

Hey guys. I have nothing to rant about the last few weeks.

I want to buy a book about advanced php. Cool ninja stuff I could do on backend... Do you have any suggestions for me?

The IT department at my school doesn't know anything on Ubuntu or even Linux for that matter.
I asked them how I could connect to the WiFi on Ubuntu, cause I couldn't connect and they just said there was nothing they could do.
After that I spend two days to figure out how to connect and finally I got it working.
Next time I don't ask if they can help. I just ask for the settings and do it myself...

Have you ever got so stressed because everything is falling around you that you automatically just went into full peace mode because there was nothing you could do to reverse the damage?

Me: I have nothing to do.
Also Me: *has 15 open GitHub issues to fix and make*

NOTHING FUCKING WORKS OMG.

I WANT YOU TO RUN EVERY FUCKING 15 MINUTES, IS THAT SO FUCKING HARD? THE ONLY THING THAT'S GOING TO BE HARD AROUND HERE, IS ME!

Geez, all I am trying to do is to run a php script every 15 minutes, and literally every solution I have tried has failed...

Oh my gosh. Windows is...eh..

I mean, it is outdated and slow, has bugs and many other stuff, but do you know why I use it? It is widely supported.

Compare application support on Mac or Linux! It is nothing compared to Windows.

However, I will still have to deal with it for a very very long time...

Wasted around 10 hours and did nothing. Still not in mood to do anything interesting.

The moment I need internet to do things (npm with angular), but the company moved to a new building and internet is screwed. It'll still take a while to set up. So now I'm sitting here, ranting on devrant and doing nothing.

My exact face and thoughts right now:

Nothing more refreshing than seeing the code definitely do the opposite of what its line comments say it does in the first file you open to get to know the new project 😅

So we have a long weekend here (4 days) due to a national holiday, and I already spend 2.5/4 days coding for work, doing tasks for a sprint that didn't even start yet, just so when I go back to work, I can feel like I do nothing and still earn money

Absolute hate for clients who just go about “I want it today” and not realise or understand that it’s them who need to sort out their issues before we can do our part.

The worst part is that my project manager remembers nothing so I have to jump into these discussions and raise issues.

i7, 8GB RAM with 2GB nvidia graphics couldn't handle the training of neural net on a google text corpus! -.-"
I'm just watching it train, nothing to do! oh but wait,I can rant! 😃😃

Took some leave recently to interview for a new job. Back to work to find that I have nothing to do. Asked for more work and got nothing. This place just gives me constant reminders of why I'm looking elsewhere

Nothing is more satisfying and unsatisfying at the same time than completing a personal project that has been giving you something to do for several months.

First time poster, long time lurker here.

Father: knows nothing about programming but tells me how to do everything...mmm, ok.

Mother: a sponge for all my frustrations...prey for her.

Brother: thinks that I am Tony Stark.

Grandparents: ..well I spend my days with a typewriter and a television for them xD

If I'm writing an app which has the sole purpose of receiving some data from a server, then sending some other data back (so nothing is stored locally) - what sort of stuff do I write tests for?

Client wants lots of testing to occur, but all of the tests I can think of wouldn't add any value

Anyone else have the issue where you have to pretty much do nothing all day as there isn't any work ?

Fuck the feelings of powerlessness and helplessness. when a friend comes crying for you for help with their hacked account and you keep asking them about what they did to protect it in the first place and they reply with nothing, no recovery email, no recover phone, no secondary verification, NOTHING. and you can do nothing but stand there and watch them cry while you can literally do nothing because there literally nothing you can do to retrieve their stolen accounts. FUCK BLACK HAT HACKERS.

Netbeans, it is time you, and I, had a little talk. While I understand you can have your little hissie-fits from time to time, what happened today was nothing short of a tantrum. I saved you once, and how do you repay me? You commit suicide, thats how. All I want to do is go to a class I want to work in. This is completely unacceptable behaviour, and I will be leaving you for a raspberry pi.

Sincerely
Yudothis Mcnetwork

Nothing ruins my day like having to touch up python scripts. I'm predominantly a Java dev and never learned Python properly so every time I do it its THE WORST

Sometimes i want to erase all my programing skills to learn it all over again, it felt great when i instructed computer to do something, rather these days i'm asked to make computer do something, first hello world was nothing but that i what i wanted to do 😊

Good Feeling at the moment. Showered, Shaved, Coffee, Nothing to do to day

When you introduce code into your game that has nothing to do with AI navigation, which somehow completely bones your AI navigation.

Went for a interview asking java and likes and interviewer told the job is about machine learning and nothing to do with java.

[LinkedIn, Recruiter InMail]

Hello,

I am Lazy As Fuck, and I'm looking for people to work for a company that pays me for doing nothing.

Do you know anyone that is an Angular developer? If you do, please tell them to send me their resume and phone number.

Thanks.

Boss just told me that he thought him making changing directly on production was "OK", because it always seemed to automatically update the other environments when his changes appeared "magically" a week later.

Yeah, because the frequent deployments I do and then come across your un-approved changes which I'm constantly flagging up has nothing to do with it!!

*facepalm*

Hey guys! I just started to code and now I think I am in depression :)) I'm working my way with swift and Xcode, and I'm trying to build a project. BUT! as soon as I managed to solve a freaking huge problem, I got hit by a small one and tried to fix it all day but nothing helped. no inspiration, no nothing. And now I am sitting in my chair, writing this post and questioning my entire life and what I am going to do with it...

For almost a year now, I had a domain and web hosting. I've yet to do anything interesting with it, I planned to create a website but so far, nothing... I fail :(

It's still so amazing to me how plebs/muggles/whatever no nothing about technology....like wtf do they think is happening behind that social media website that's catering to advertising weaknesses.

They don't I guess

What I really hate? When a piece of code simply refuses to work. No logs, no exceptions, no sign that it even exists. HOW THE FUCK I'M SUPPOSE TO DEBUG THIS SHIT?? I drives me crazy, if everything I do changes nothing! It makes me doubt my sanity. And I like my sanity!

1. Use all my vacation days
2. Learn something that has nothing to do with computers (seriously I bore myself sometimes in conversation)
3. Drink more rum and learn about it at the same time
4. Make time for friends and family
5. No massive outages!

Mostly I want to step out of work and be more sociable

Been thinking about how to detect sounds for weeks and finally got enough time and motivation to do a Google search... and find an entire example....

All that thinking and worrying for nothing.... now i just gotta figure out how to install PyAudio.... hope it's not hard.... or maybe I already have it installed....

!dev

It's here! It's finally here! College (Merican) football gameday is finally fucking here.

Time to do absolutely nothing for the rest of the day! 😁😁😁😁

Question; if you've got a team member who's been phoning it in during the last few sprints and their inattention causes extra work for others, what do you do?

- Have a private word directly one to one.
- Say nothing but bitch amongst yourselves
- Complain to the team lead
- Call them out during a daily standup and tell them they're producing shit.

Any opinions?

So I'm a "Web Application Developer" but I have to go out on site whilst a trained engineer sits in the office doing nothing. Everything I can do on site I can do from my office with teamviewer. Hit the M25 at 09:00 and will hit it again at 17:00 ... not a fun day

Hey guys so we need to start taking accessibility seriously, it’s the law - right now we currently do nothing.

So let’s start with something super simple. Alt text has to be provided for an image...

“This is all bollocks let’s be honest”

😳🤦🏻‍♂️

Um...so I don’t make the rules, the W3C define the standards for the web. Disabled users matter...

So I got everything done that I'm supposed to this month. Now usually I would try to get ahead of the rush. However, since now even upper management doesn't trust me to do my job I figure I will adopt the same development process as the rest of the group: do nothing for the first three weeks of the month and in the last week hastily make excuses for why nothing is done while doing just enough to justify my continued employment.

the word bug has lost all meaning to me because all issues in the repo are labelled "bug"

That being said, the best bugs I fix are the ones where i can say its IEs fault and theres nothing i can do so i dont have to do anything because IE will never be updated

Had to get my car looked at because it kept veering to the right, and my team decides to meet to work on our website without me. "You don't have to be there. It's fine." Next day, I learn that they finished a lot of the website and there's not much left to do. No, it's fine. I only wanted to contribute the ******* simple backend stuff and look like I contributed nothing to the website.

Surely this post has nothing to do with a certain vulnerability found recently, would it?!

Decisions, decisions, decisions

- Asus ZenBook
- Dell XPS
- ThinkPad X1 Carbon

Going to be programming, running Ubuntu nothing too power intensive but want the power there if need be. Plus I do love a solid build and keyboard. Thoughts?

When a fellow programmer/teammate, who tends to be a little to extroverted for my tastes, decides he had nothing to do for the last hour and wants to come talk. An hour and a half later it finally makes sense to just call it a day.

If I had a fucking dollar for every time someone interrupts me at work. I literally get bothered in the hour by people in QA that have nothing better to do ( not taking shots at QA ). What irks me is when they continue to chat up a storm behind me with someone else when I finally get the point across.

The sentence we all dread:
"My stereo (insert any other piece of home tech...) is acting up, call ______ he works with computer's he'll know what to do"

ME: "Take it to the service shop, I'm a programmer not an electrical engineer"

After that you can't help but think they're thinking you just suck at your job... "pff he know's nothing"

In the mood of doing nothing because I have so much shit going on. Anyone knows that feeling?

Also so many (cool) projects I would like to do but no motivation to start anything... I have no real reason to... I’m just waiting for motivation to come back one day - but it has been a long time.. :(

Received a new HP Probook 640 G2 laptop for work, everyone else has theirs as 64bit machines. Yet the idiots who handle hardware and software installs installed windows for a 32bit machine. Well at least I get waste half a day and do nothing while they redo everything and then I have to still get shit done later.

Use to do backend stuff, today I spent most of the afternoon understanding and fixing a damn jade file. Fuck frontend, I really hate that stuff.
Sorry to all the frontend fellas here, I have nothing against you :P :)

Still a student, working part time at a dev company, doing small work 'cause they have nothing to make me do, and today the two person I'm supposed to work with are on leave...

Why do people hate jQuery so much? 30KB is basically nothing in times of modern bandwidth and for me CSS selectors are mich more readable than the Vanilla JS functions.
Im not judging and would be happy if someone explains it to me or shows better alternatives.

happy new year! what do yall have planned for this year? I'm thinking about writing me up a miniature jarvis to automate my Web Development business, nothing really special just automated invoices, website installs, calendar, contract signing, etc. where all I have to do is type up a requirement list and code

I really get stressed when i am jobless or have nothing to do

When you have two managers and one of them is trying to screw you into a position on his team even though you have made it clear that you want nothing to do with that type of development.

I am looking for a new job now...

30something, i was bored and had nothing better to do

Why the fuck does Android's SyncAdapter stop working without ANY notice since API level 26 when available storage is low?

They fucking deprecated the system-wide broadcast that the storage is getting too full to properly work. And there's no replacement!!! 😠 No callback. No exception. Nothing. You ask the SyncAdapter to sync and it will just not do it until some storage is freed.... 😭

Finished my planned work for current sprint 3 days early. Nobody needs help, nothing to do until new tasks are given out. Expected to feel great. Feeling useless.

I am freelance, fullstack, and there are days, like today, that I get up, and I spend hours in front of the screen and I can not do anything, practically boring and without a bit of motivation to do anything, I could defecate while I'm sitting, not It would affect me in nothing .....

That moment when I start to finish my project and after 4 hours playing games I realize that is time to go in bed!!
Good night to all.

Do u ever had the feeling that you're just too tired to do anything? Well I just had a full week of just doing nothing.. fuck this

So I feel like looking up solutions for my code is cheating, so I try to do it on my own for hours. Nothing I try works and the solution is usually something really simple and I feel like I'm never going to understand..

!rant

Gotta start learn react. Only two frontends in my company know react and it seems my Vue knowledge don't mean nothing... I'm kind of excited, mainly because for a long time I wanted to make mobile apps and with react native I'll be able to do so.

How do we expect the new generation of programmers to learn anything, when nowadays the answer to any programming question is to use a library? Without knowing what the library itself actually does, the programmer learns nothing. Even small things that could be done within a single file, are turned into clunky libraries. Am I missing something crucial?

It must be good to at least know computer networking?! I remember nothing about these TCP, UDP, whatever the fudge protocol shite. I don't remember these megabit and megabyte things. All I do is code from one end to another. Anyone else watched Eli The Computer Guy's series?

So I rush to job just to find a power outage on the building , don't know if I should be happy to have "nothing" to do or be sad cause I have a lot to do but can't 😓

Does every project have that guy who likes everything organized and strives for it, but at the same time there is nothing to organize because he doesn't do a thing?

Spent all morning debugging legacy code that I need to migrate.

Most of the time is just waiting for it to load --pieces of data-- entire tables from the database and then filter out the records it doesn't want using some app logic.

WHAT SORT OF MONKEY WRITES CODE LIKE THIS? HOW WAS THIS EVEN ALLOWED INTO PRODUCTION...

I have to open Notepad to write down my chain of thoughts, steps, and things to check once the next breakpoints are hit so that I don't forget them.

So in theory I'm being paid all morning to sit around and do nothing.

That sounds great but I'm falling asleep... Shoulda worked from home...

What was I saying again...yea...

DON'T HIRE MONKEYS!!! THEY WRITE SHIT CODE THAT WASTES EVERYONE'S TIME EVEN AFTER THEY LEAVE...

I'm going to lunch now... Hopefully Notepad has enough into for me to remember what I was doing...

The worst part about being a Dev is explaining what exactly that you do to your distant relative who knows nothing about computers 😑

Work on something else. Have nothing else to work, invent a feature and work on that for a while. Do something other than that specific problem and an answer will come to you.

when you code for straight 9 hours and start playing fifa on playstation for fun.
nothing better to do than being infront of screens one after another.

does anybody of you do freelance work and outsource it to upwork/fiverr and living the sweet nothing to do life (except talking to the customer and writing briefings)?

What bothers me most with the Matrix hack is that so many people say oh look the secure messenger got hacked. From what I can tell it had nothing to do with their software nor their protocol. If you're running your own Homeserver you're totally unaffected.

This awesome moment when you‘re late into your thesis, find a possible improvement that would require new measurements, but then find out that this improvement can‘t be done with your constraints and there is nothing to do❤️

4 days vacation nothing to do..

In the old days "hacking" was used for just about any coding, or "computer programming" as it was called back then. There was even a programming magazine called "Hacker", which had nothing to do with the "malevolous programming" that the word "hacker" has become to mean.

Sitting in the office with nothing to do...
Any ideas on how to get time passing ?

Will in the future exist a language called JavaScriptScript named because of JavaScript's popularity although it has nothing to do with it?

So had a plan to do a gamejam this week seeing I had nothing planned after work but nooooooooooooooo of course everything I could ever need to do decides it needs to be done this week -.-

It's what I get for being excited I guess :-(

Today is the only day in a few months that I'm able to rest and do nothing. Buut, I'm in the office. Why? Deadline of course. At least I'm getting free lunch and getting payed for this day(I hope so)

Command Prompt is archaic and useless. The most I can do with it (without using other programs) is copy files and overwrite user passwords. Both useful, granted, but nothing compared to the Windows GUI - or, like, any other command line? Heck, I'd rather just have a python shell and nothing else.

when you work remotely and your already shitty(third-world) internet goes down and you have nothing better to do than refresh devrant hoping for an interesting post...

Sitting around all day getting nothing important done and complaining about not having anything useful to do.

Guess what I am supposed to be doing now?

The deepest and darkest circle of hell is reserved for people who write single line commit messages which have nothing to do with the code they committed

Well that's my first framework... Back when I was a 12 year old nerd who had nothing else to do besides mix and match crappy 240p YouTube tutorials... Now I've upped my game and use 1080p YouTube tutorials 😂🙂

RANT
SO FKING BORED. ALL TICKETS ARE CLOSED, NOTHING IN TRELLO. SITTING IDLE IS THE FUCKING DIFFICULT THING TO DO. IF I WILL NOT GET AN ISSUE ASSIGNED TO ME SOON THEN THERE WILL BE BLOOD SHED EVERYWHERE.

Don't ya just love it when someone you work with is constantly asking you to do stuff. Even though you literally ask nothing of them. Can't say no though because then they throw a gigantic 11 year old temper tantrum..

heck yea, started my first real React Native project. It's called R8 I stole the idea from @n3xus because in lazy and have nothing else to do. If you wanna check out my progress or fix my anything I can't fucking do, go to my GitHub, retrax24.

any time i come up with a cleaver solution to a problem I remember my cousin who works for nasa and i mope about how I've waisted my life and nothing i do matters.

Worst: Shitty puzzles which have nothing to do with logic, progressive solution, etc. You either know them or you don't.