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Father bought a PC in 1997. Back then very few had it. I learned doing things like accessing the internet and sending emails, among others. I remember having added age on websites to be allowed to sign up at times :P My sisters used to play games on it sometimes. The first few ones we had were Tomb Raider: The Last Revelation, Tomb Raider Chronicles, American McGee's Alice(Which caused us to upgrade the PC xD)... And some others.
I have a memory of this pseudo-3D-looking game where you move in a maze and try answering questions. I want to remember its name, but I cannot :(
We literally have video evidence of me liking the computer as a child, yet my parents either say I'm addicted or deny I've ever liked it before. Not only that, but continuously limiting my time with the PC hasn't been a literal obstacle in my way of trying to do things in their opinion. Funny how my parents think the last few years I've been my worst when they've hurt me in those years so much that our relationship is guaranteed not working out. There were doubts in my head before, but now it's cemented and there is no way of going back. Father, for example, tells me it's too late to do anything with a PC now(As well as how I've been unable to use the PC. He looks at these pro players' footage in some TV show and he's like, „You've been unable to use your hobbies“, as if they have never ever screamed at me for perceived gaming and not actually cared to check), and I need to look for a „real“ job.
Sorry. I went to bed at 2:00 in the morning. Feel like a zombie because of ongoing weirdly insufficient sleep, even though I sleep kinda more than normal. Even when I took Melatonine for that it didn't help at all.
Childhood was where beating began. I was about 6/7. Right when I entered school. The first school that I attended was a private one and supposedly for „Wunderkinds“, while in reality I haven't seen a SINGLE teacher or psychologist approve of it, their argument being that children were basically drowned in work that wasn't age-appropriate(I don't mean anything bad. Just that teaching about Galaxies and all in first grade isn't the brightest idea). There was always a mountain of homework to do and as opposed to some other countries, we had to do it on a day to day basis. We didn't have a week-long deadline. I was predictably not keeping up with it as I could have, had it been a normal amount, so my parents decided I didn't want to study and began their methods of getting me to „study“. I have yet to see a person able to keep up with that school's tempo, no matter the age.
This place was also where I got bullied. I felt I had nowhere to be: At home, the parents' situation, at school, the bully. I never really went outside to play with other children, so I missed that part of childhood.
After the second year of school I was transferred to an advanced German school, called like that because they taught German and not English there. I also got to learn a bit of Russian before they removed it from school. In that period I used to attend ballet. But for less than a year. And piano, which I remember having attended for quite a long while, some years, if my memory isn't fried. I quit it because of it having been forced on me. Last piece I ever played fully was Beethoven's Marmotte.
In this school I was once again the outcast of the class. I had some people to interact with. All of those interactions lasted a few years at most. Then, because of a part of my class choosing me as a laughing-stock N2 and another girl as the N1, I found my best friend, who I still have today. She's the only friend I have nearby.
Most of the time I hated myself. Even today I struggle with that sometimes.
After that came university. This us where I got something like a friend circle at last. But it still didn't last. I got in a relationship with one of the guys, but I was just attracted. There was another I couldn't dare getting close to. Turns out he also had something for me. Then he disappeared from our lives and a year after, I still cannot forget the person. If I want to, I have to deprive myself of my own personality. Not a thing I'm willing to give up. Then I broke up with the guy I was in a relationship with and completely disappeared from the friendship circle. To be honest, I had reasons to. They refused to even try to look for the guy and they called him a friend for years. Sometimes parents hitting me can occur even today, but if I REALLY piss them off.
Now I'm here and oh, my God, I'm officially am aunt now! My sister gave birth to a daughter this morning... She's in Berlin with mother and both she and the child are doing great. I just hope she manages to be a good mother.20 -
If I could represent my life using 32-bit signed integers, you would be -2,147,483,648 because you are the Most Significant Bit of my life ❤9
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When people say: "All you do is sit in front of your PC doing stuff. Get a life"
Me: This is my life!5 -
My gf was a QA. I told her to read my last devrant story about our colleague from the previous company.
Her response was "you misspelled 'taught' twice".
😢6 -
You are the CSS to my HTML,
You make my life so beautiful.
You are the JavaScript to my code,
You make my life to be so dynamic and full of life.
You are the OS in my life,
Without you, am useless
You are the C: to my brain,
Without you am nothing.
You are the stack overflow to my problems,
I run to you for solutions.
To be continued.....10 -
me: Better check my phone for texts from friends
me: *checks phone*
me: Better get some friends
* Few seconds later *
me: Better go back to terminal2 -
Just found this yesterday in someone github profile.. you can also press the button and listen to how she says it 😂😂
Link and credits :
https://salomonelli.github.io/perso...
6 -
I am a hobby programmer. I just got rejected by the biggest crush of my life. I guess I'm stuck with my stupid wothless fucking life writing code. How fucking exciting....22
-
So my ethernet randomly stopped working on Arch.
At first I thought it had to do with a conflict between it and my tethered phone, so I tried removing all my connections. Still wasn't working.
Next I tried to test the driver itself and make sure it loaded on boot. It loaded, but was disconnected.
Next I decided "fuck it, I know I was just using the internet on Windows, but I'll check the ethernet cable is still plugged in anyway". It was, and it was returning the right MAC address, but still no connection.
So I try debugging the driver further. Everything seemed fine, except it would time out trying to establish a dhcp connection.
Finally I figured, maybe Microsoft tried to troll me and lock out the ethernet waking on boot. So I restart my computer, load into windows and check my ethernet driver, it seems fine. I go to disable the shutdown of the card on OS shutdown. Turns out this driver no longer has that capability.
Wait a minute!? Windows is also having connection issues!?
I look to my left.
Fuck my life...
My router was off... I must of kicked the powerboard under my desk..........2 -
When you have been trying to write an algorithm for 5 hours but it still doesn't work and your whole code is one big fucking mess, these variable names appear:
6 -
>be me
>Get hit by a wave of depression
>Question the reason for your existence
>Open laptop start coding as a distraction
>Discover/invent/learn something new
Hey that's nice!!! (wait for the next wave of depression)9 -
I saw someone handle redirect on every anchor link on server side. Yes, they handle onclick on serverside and then decide where to redirect. No they don’t use href or any sort that’s stated on the HTML. And this guy is my senior.16
-
So I just found this app, called LifeRPG. It lets you play your life as a game, compleating quests for exp and "gems"(which you can then trade for custom rewards.. I'm thinking.. Ice cream~ <3) I think this will help keep me motivated more to do actual things in my life. Maybe.. We'll have to see. I already set up a bunch of daily missions, and continous missions.
28 -
Got another 5 star review on my app, which also, according to Play Console, now has over 300 downloads. Life is good. 😁27
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FUUUCK I HATE FUCKING WORDPRESS AND PHP!!!! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.
I didnt change anyfuckingthing and everything went to shit! FUCK! FUCK YOU FUCKING FUUUUUCK!24 -
VueJS FTW!
Today I realised I've been a fucking idiot.
For the last few years I have familiarized myself with libraries like React, VueJS, Preact etc.
All while playing around on my own side projects but when it came to doing actual work (perhaps from a lack of confidence/working experience with them) I always reverted to vanilla js or jQuery because I convinced myself it wasn't the `right` use case or `the project was too simple or small`.
I WAS AN IDIOT.
The below screenshot is a prototype of a n invoicing tool I needed to write which uses VueJS and is implemented in 50 beautiful, clean, maintainable loc. Combined with TypeScript it is a dream - never did I think I would see the day where I could grab an inputs numerical value without prepending the variable with + so I don't end up concatenating them as strings.
If your like me and haven't started using some kind of data binding view framework stop procrastinating and just do it. I feel like I wasted a large chunk of my life clinging onto my old ways.
7 -
I have reached that point of my life where I feel a laptop with an internet connection is all I need to live the rest of my life.5
-
Sometimes I wish my life was like Windows.
Whenever I notice a problem or error, restarting my life would solve it.3 -
Windows removed from my life - check
Spotify removed from my life - check
Facebook removed from my life - check
Non-free software completely removed from my life - check
Now I just have to solve the rest32 -
My Perfect Day : Assumption
Woke up at 6. Went for morning walk or do yoga or some sort of stuff.
Came back at 7. Went for daily routine, like bathing and all.
Went to prepare breakfast at 7:45. Prepared some eggs and bread and coffee.
It is 8:15 now. Reading news papers or watching tv and doing breakfast.
At 9 check mails and prepare some stuff.
At 9: 30 went for office. Reached office 5 minute before 10, safe and sound.
Came back at 7 by evening. Did some rest. Prepare dine till 9. Take a bath. Complete the dine.
At 10:30 ready to sleep.
Actual Scenario :
Woke up at 8:30. No time for yoga or morning walk. No time for preparing breakfast as well. Went straight to bathroom. Came back in 20 minutes. Made a cup of coffee. No time for newspaper or tv.
Feeling lazy and tired already. At 9:10 went for office. Before reaching office stopped at fast food joints. buy some junk food. Eat them. Got traffic jam and reached office late.
Started working but feeling lazy. Boss asked twice about the project status and i am unable to think a single line of code.
However, days passed. Boss scolded me. I promised him to finish the work after reaching home.
Reached home at 7:30. Late for no reason. Went straight to bed. Sleeps a hour. But took 20 minutes to leave bed.
Started working on projects i did not complete in the office.
Time fly and it is already 1 in morning. No dinner. Tired as fuck but hungry as well. So made some eggs and eat. Wrapped the task but it is 3:30 in morning and i jumped to bed for sleep.
Loop.3 -
I am 21 and I just found out that I have rheumatoid arthritis in my fingers
I think a little part, no ,a huge chunk inside of me just died.
Why the fuck does life keep piling shit...
what's the fucking point....35 -
Today I saw a code written by my junior. Basically excel export. The laravel excel package provide great ways for optimization.
My junior instead did 6 times loop to modify the data before giving that data to the export package. We need to export around 50K users.
When I asking him why this ? He said it works and it's fast so what the issue ???
Noob , you have only 100 users in the database and production has 10 million.
Sometime I just want to kill him.15 -
Just got a message from a co-worker out of the blue telling me he loves my code.
Happiest day of my life :D
Means more to me than any other achievement in my life. -
Fucking School, when I'm home I'll finish that personal project. Or at least work on it.
Later that day:
God, school's exhausting.. I only wanna play games (League/GW2) with my girlfriend now -
As a total noobass with Linux I tried installing Arch. Why the fuck did I do that.
I fucked up the drive partitions, deleted the Windows boot loader and now neither Windows nor Arch fucking loads.
Can this get any worse12 -
!dev && !rant
My sister is getting married tomorrow. My cousin will get married in 3 weeks.. a good friend of mine just became a mom.
They’re all about my age.
This made me realize i only have about 2 friends which I see once every few months, don’t meet any new people, don’t take care of my physical health and haven’t been in a relationship for about 7 years by now.
I started working as a dev 8 years ago and really sacrificed my life to the 2 companies I worked for.
I own nice cars and make good money (relatively spoken) , but for me I know I really have to get my shit together and start to actually get a personal / social life.
So I decided to quit my job and move to another country where I feel like I fit in (posted about the idea to do this a while ago and devs here were super supportive, thanks for that guys)
From now on, I’ll make sure to have a good work-life balance and take more care of myself.
Otherwise, success and money ain’t worth shit..
A good weekend to all of you and happy coding.4 -
Created a poll to chose which side project to carry on during holidays, came up with a new one instead.
Story of my life.1 -
Taxi Driver: Do you like this song Sir?
Me: Not sure, I don't know it!
Taxi Driver: Alexa, change the song...
Me:...4 -
First day of the academic year(CS):
(some uni official) - "And remember to become a good programmer you have to become an excellent mathematician first"
(Me): Oh shit.
Little did I know...
It is a second year now. And the only course I failed is the one that he lectured.
I had no fucking idea that people like this (mad)man exist.
Almost at every lecture he was introducing at leas one topic that was way beyond our program; as he thought they were interesting and "fun".
Many teachers at the University refered to him as a very 'ambitious' man. Then I didn't blame him he truly loved his profession and wanted to share as much knowledge as possible(I thought).
But two months ago he went to far. It was a second exam(for those who failed the first one). And believe me there were a few(60 out of 160 to be exact).
Only ~30 people showed up as the rest failed to many courses and would be kicked out of the uni anyway.
He was handing out the exams when I saw that whoever gets one slowly starts turning white.
I finally got my copy and immediately I realized that the tasks are from his favorite topics, the "fun" ones. 🤦
At this point I knew that it will be extremely hard to pass. But when I was reevaluating my life choices something draw my attention.
One of the tasks had a note below it: "Homework after the exam: It is a very interesting problem just assume x instead of y and try to solve it. PS: it is a lot of fun!"
At this point I lost it.😠 I don't care how much you love math, you should always assume that not everyone loves it as much as you do. So don't push it down the throat of people who clearly don't need a degree in this subject!
Now I'm preparing for the second semester with this guy. And I have a strong feeling that it will be hell of a ride... again.😐
BTW: Sorry that the rant is so long, it's the first one I wrote, and had to share it with someone 😀18 -
Great
Updated GPU drivers, turned my PC off while i was getting something to eat and watch YouTube videos in the living room, decided to go work on some project, turn my PC back on, and... Nothing works...
Neither of my monitors displays anything and not even my keyboard turns on... Didn't even get to see the splash screen of my mobo vendor
Why does this shit always happen to me?7 -
Well is a long story, but to make it short, a friend started to teach me HTML after that at school they taught me c++, and after my first "Hello World" I was hooked, since then I became an addict to programming and now to devrant4
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Simple. I push everyone I care about out of my life, and procrastinate dev life until the last seconds. My life has no balance.
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Recently not a single fucking thing is going my way...... Every goddamn new thing i try, screws me over in some way... And when I finally think somethings working, I get fucked more than a highway hooker.1
-
My laptop battery is absolute rat-shit, it drains half of itself when I try to copy a large file...16
-
i've never earned more in my life
i've never been more bored in my life
...is this a pattern?
pls halp13 -
Just ran "rm -rf <project_folder>" instead of "rm -rf <project_folder>/Library/PackageCache"
I'm almost afraid to open the project itself right now
I stopped it like a second later, but still it has deleted some project configuration :(6 -
TL; DR;
I'm one with code and the code is one with me.
Everything in my life has been inconsistent and as soon as I start building expectations from someone or something, it disappoints. Be it my friends (😂😂) or my ex girlfriend or my studies or my college or my professors or work, or food (sometimes).
Coding, or programming, has been the only consistent and non disappointing thing since 2010 for me. It just works. If I write a wrong program, I know its why and where its wrong and then fixing it works. Sometimes it works in one go. And sometimes is works beyond my expectations. Its like coding chose me rather than me chosing coding. -
-start a startup ground up
-make more connections with people
-doing a meaningful life
-and... Finding love of my life as well -
My life has been pretty rough this week regarding personal life context, but at least my pull requests are being approved and having good comments, which is nice.
-
I've been up for more than 24 hours and I've a project to finish by Friday evening.
On the other hand, I've a complaining gf.4 -
"How do I balance my Social life and Dev life?", they asked. I am now wondering when did I had any life?3
-
Have a big legacy project which should be updated to current technologies,
but when it's done, these current technologies are outdated already, so you
Have a big legacy project which should be updated to current technologies, -
Im started with Lego, with 12 i learned to solder, got interested in computers and ended up learning diverse languages to solve problems.
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Well.. I Guess i can't use apt-get anymore then...
I try to use apt-get ( image at top)
It does not work. Libc6 needs to be
reinstalled.
I try to install a libc6 package i downloaded from packages.debian.org
(image at bottom)
An error occurs.
Fuck My life!
10 -
I just discovered bedrocklinux.org and am wondering where this mind-bending tool/toy has been all my life. This thing is amazing!18
-
!dev
I just discovered that I could use a comb to shave myself while retaining some facial hair. Something is wrong with my life.7 -
I have just been invited to a Technical Test Server for the game I currently play most, but I have some development in progress! God my life is full of hard choices!
Spoiler: I'm playing on the TTS right now :x -
!dev
I was so tired of work last week and weather was so good I ended up in a bar.
People were so nice there so I got there second day in a row.
I met new nice people and cute female bartender who laughed from my jokes.
Was to drunk and tried so much to make her laugh that l forgot to get her number.
Got there next day asked bartender for her shifts, turned out it was last day of her work, she moved out from city for at least a year. So I got drunk again, and so on 5 days in a row.
Well that’s my life. Lucky me... again.
Karma is so funny I can’t laugh for some time anymore. -
*Formats hard drive without backing up important files*
*plays in the background*
https://soundcloud.com/matthew-sill...4 -
My favourite time of the year, the clocks have changed and fucked every one of our legacy systems up1
-
Code didn't change my life because I've been coding since I was a kid. You could say that it shaped my life instead. I don't know life without code. I don't know if that's good or it's not...
-
I told the designers how a web works a hundred times.
I thought they got it.
Today they handed me a "web design" as an InDesign file.2 -
This huge OS project, Magento, have TONS of guidelines, most about decoupling,, it has an extended MVC structure with even more layers than those 3.. All good in theory, guess what.. Guidelines is not followed..
Changing order of two blocks in the view breaks business logic.. So much for decoupling.. You would not believe how many hours I've spent debugging this..
And I can't believe I've dedicated 12 years of my professional live to this platform..2 -
Wow! OS/Browser stats for the past 40 days on heavens-above.com (astro db, not religion). Features IE4, Netscape, WinNT and 98!
http://heavens-above.com/VisitsByOS...
5 -
named two strings as fuck and cunt (because im tired of debugging this stupid bug since last 5 hours)
compiling...
aaand laptop freezes
fuck. my. life.1 -
My Coding Loop :
while (working) {
coding();
createNewBug();
if (bugs != 0) {
fixTheFuckingBugs();
if (bugs != 0) {
fuckMySelf();
} else {
continueWorking();
}
}
}1 -
Work/life balance doesn’t exist!
I have no personal life outside what I do. My creative expression. It heavily influences my every decision and makes up who I am, and it is not possible to draw the line where my creativity ends and my personal life with my partner, friends and stuff begins. Coincidentally, it is also my “job”.
The day my creativity stops will mark the end of what makes my life meaningful.6 -
Note: In this rant I will ask for advices, and confess some sins. I will tell my personal story- it will be long.
So basically it has been almost 2 years since I first entered the world of software development. It has been the biggest and most important quest of my life so far, but yet I feel like I missed a lot of my objectives, and lots of stuff did not go the way I wanted them to be, and it makes feel frustrated and it lowered my self esteem greatly. I feel confused and a bit depressed, and don't know what to do.
I'll start: I'm 23 years old. 2 years ago I was still a soldier(where I live there is a forced conscription law) in a sysadmin/security role. I grew tired of the ops world and got drawn more and more into programming. A tremendous passion became to burn in me, as I began to write small programs in Python and shell scripts. I wanted to level up more seriously so I started reading programming books and got myself into a 10 month Java course.
In the meanwhile I got released from army duty and got a job as a security sysadmin at a large local telco company. Job was boring and unchallenging but it payed well. I had worked there for 1 year and at the same time learned more and more stuff from 2 best friends who have been freelance developers for years. I have learned how to build full-stack mobile apps and some webdev, mainly Android and Node.js. However because I was very inexperienced and lacked discipline, all of my side projects failed horribly, and all attempts to work with my experienced friends have failed too- I feel they lost a lot of trust for me(they don't say it, but I feel it, maybe I'm wrong).
I began to realise I had to leave this job and seek a developer job in order to get better, and my wish came true 6 months ago when I finally got accepted into a startup as a fullstack webdev, for a bit lower wage but I felt it was worth it. I was overjoyed.
But now my old problems did not end, they just changed. My new job is a thousand times harder and more intensive than the old one. I feel like it sucks all the energy and motivation that was still left in me, and I have learned almost nothing in my free time, returning home exhausted. My bosses are not impressed from my work despite me being pretty junior level, and I feel like I'm in a vicious cycle that keeps me from advancing my abilities. My developer friends I mentioned earlier have jobs like I do and still manage to develop very impressive side projects and even make a nice sum of money from them, while I can't even concetrate on stupid toy projects and learning.
I don't know why It is like this. I feel pathetic and ashamed of my developer sins and lack of discipline. During that time I also gained some weight that I'm trying t lose now... I know not all of it is my fault but it makes me feel like crap.
Sorry for the long story. I just feel I need to spill it out and hope to get some advices from you guys who may or may not have similar experiences. Thanks in advance for reading this.2 -
So I lost £40 and had to spend ANOTHER £40 to pay my friend back that I couldn't fucking afford. Why is the world just giving me a constant barrage of shit and fuckups that make me want to kill myself more each time. Fuck this shit, 8m so tired of it. FUUUUUUUHSLWNX DNSISY ,83+£;£)# JDTCVOSMDD ARGHHHH7
-
spent all day finishing up a feature that i did not want to do at all and think its not the time for it...
after 5 hours of coding & debugging i finally made the PR, took the rest of the day off, felt happy i got rid of that task along with the nagging of the PM. life was good.
At 8 PM, some test i never heard of failed, my branch was the issue and it got reverted and now ill have to work on it again on Monday to fix it. fuck my life. -
Rahul sir is very wise. Its a good thing he's there to suggest such brilliance.
expiryForBooking = [responseDictionary[@"ExpiryForBooking"] integerValue]+5; //Rahul sir Suggestion9 -
Today something pretty bad happened (as always at school)
and I'm gonna rant about it to
1) get your expertly opinion on it
2) relieve from it
SOOOOO
today I entered class to paretake in the writing of the much anticipated class test (kappa).
The teacher gives everybody a sheet with the exercises - let alone me.
I tell him to give me a sheet too.
"Put a book between you and xy"
so I do. I ask him again to give me the exam paper. No response.
Again, and he looks at me with a disrespectful look. I look back. And get thrown out of the room - not getting a chance to paretake in the writing of the test yet getting the worst grade one could possibly get in the modest german education system (=> 6)
Now I'm going to pursue any possible legal action against him (I dont care about him. After the lesson I wanted to talk with him; yet he declined my offer for reconsiliation, then he called my parents, even though he had time to think about what he did {any sane person would agree that what he did was wrong <yet my classmates dont agree>}. Also, he is that type of teacher who gives unusually unnessecary homework - which I personally see as punition, since I already know 97% of the stuff thought in [english] classes)
See why I am despising school so much?
It drains my last bit of energy until I am an empty shell with the sole goal to finish education asap in order to be able to fucking work.
BTW: I tried using my best english in this rant to demonstrate my abilities in order for you to be able to see that I honestly dont those "basic" english lessons.7 -
I didn't know what I should do with my life..... Then I started learning how to waste it in programming.
-
I startet coding as hobby when i was a child, now its my job, my hobby and i still have no life, thats how coding affected my life =}
-
You know, I don't mind getting dragged if I deserve it. But it would be nice to have ALL the information I need to make an estimate BEFORE you hang me out to dry.
First I was told that work on this issue could be kicked down the road since we were getting big contracts. The next day the issue was in the sprint.
I tell you I won't be able to get it done with the business critical stuff you said absolutely had to be done that sprint (turns out we had 3 months of leeway even before COVID). You say alright cool. We push it to next sprint. The next day you say we have been pushing that issue too much and we absolutely have to get it done this sprint. At least have it so QA can look at it by Tuesday.
I give a preliminary look to QA cuz I found a bug, but they can test other shit about this fucking issue, but then get shut down fucking again because it isn't code complete.
STOP. MOVING. FUCKING. GOAL POSTS. AND. GASLIGHTING. ME.
And as a bonus, I disagree with the necessity of this work in general. I think it's fucking stupid, unnecessary, and zero value added. It's a management jerkoff issue that is going to piss off all of our users.1 -
As a programmer I solve my life problems using programming too..
<?php
$problemSolved = “Fuck Life!!!”;
echo $problemSolved;
?>4 -
This vacations I decide to learn c# in VS, it's cool but the time the compilation and debugging is so much, literally I can write a book in this moment4
-
!rant
You know I used to be fucked up in almost every aspect of life: academically, socially, financially etc. But I am happy I am able to fight back. After my college semester exams finished, I am so happy to enjoy such a great social life. Like I can go and hangout each and every day and night, whereas earlier I would be in my room all day and night, infact even my neighbors would question my existence. But now its so much fun to hangout, feels really great. :') -
Hummm(flash back)... I was studying art and design when I've decided to become a web designer, but by the time it came to take my degree also took some frontend languages and them(big explosion and fireworks) it was like magic, I could design and give life to my creations!!! 6 years later still is magic(not the rainbow and unicorns type) ...you know dam well i am talking to you javascript(and your dam post apocalypse bugs)... 😁😁😁 still wouldn't imagine my self doing anything else!
-
!dev
!!Lyrics
Really a random post but related to my personal dev-life so maybe it’s at least arguable if it belongs here.
This is one of my all time favorite songs, I can identify myself with it (although I’m reinterpreting some parts).
Back in Highschool I had girlfriends, I had time, I had my entourage, everything except money. All my dad wanted me to become was a rich fucking millionaire. Failure was never accepted, no matter what it was about and everything could always have been done better.
It was pretty much a military childhood. I already loved programming back then but only as a hobby, kinda.
I really wanted to make good money so I started a dev career (with makes gooooood money where I came from). The more I invested in my career, and that was a lot, I more and more lost the understanding of what’s really important, just pursued my goal of being the best fucking dev out there and start my own company in the next 10 years.
Well.. 10 years are over now, I’m still an engineer and I lost everything I had before I started this. Especially friends and relations to women (which I’m not even able to connect to anymore).
In this lyric, the blackbird and raven are the career that just ate me alive. Hope that makes any sense to some of you?..
Anyway, here the lyrics if you wanna read it:
—————————————-
Sons of Anarchy
Come join the murder - white buffalo
There's a blackbird perched outside my window
I hear him calling
I hear him sing
He burns me with his eyes of gold to embers
He sees all my sins
He reads my soul
One day that bird, he spoke to me
Like Martin Luther
Like Pericles
Come join the murder
Come fly with black
We'll give you freedom
From the human trap
Come join the murder
Soar on my wings
You'll touch the hand of God
And he'll make you king
And he'll make you king
On a blanket made of woven shadows
Flew up to heaven
On a raven's glide
His angels they turn my wings to wax now
I fell like judas, grace denied
On that day that he lied to me
Like Martin Luther
Like Pericles
Come join the murder
Come fly with black
We'll give you freedom
From the human trap
Come join the murder
Soar on my wings
You'll touch the hand of God
And he'll make you king
And he'll make you king
I walk among the children of my fathers
The broken wings, betrayal's cost
They call to me but never touch my heart, now
I am too far
I'm too lost
All I can hear is what he spoke to me
Like Martin Luther
Like Pericles
Come join the murder
Come fly with black
We'll give you freedom
From the human trap
Come join the murder
Soar on my wings
You'll touch the hand of God
And he'll make you king
And he'll make you king
So now I curse that raven's fire
You made me hate, you made me burn
He laughed aloud as he flew from eden
You always knew, you never learn
The crow no longer sings to me
Like Martin Luther
Or Pericles
Come join the murder
Come fly with black
We'll give you freedom
From the human trap
Come join the murder
Soar on my wings
You'll touch the hand of God
And he'll make you king
And he'll make you king
Come join the murder
Come fly with black
We'll give you freedom
From the human trap
Come join the murder
Soar on my wings
You'll touch the hand of God
And he'll make you king
And he'll make you king3 -
I'm going out of my f&;$)" mind trying to serve my site from digital ocean with Nginx and Node. Won't serve my page no matter what I do 😭😭😭😭
Literally been on this for 10+hours at this point.1 -
How yesterday should have ended:
- completed vimtutor
- Arch installed on my laptop
- arch rice (essential)
- arch configured to consume as little battery as possible
How it ended:
- no working pendrive found in my house. FML
I know I already posted a rant/meme on installing Linux (I gave up cause too many problems) but this time it was for real. I'll try again today with a borrowed pendrive.1
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