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So this fucking happened today.
Me: *sees support ticket coming in about some kind of login issue*
Me: *opens issue*
"Hello, I can't seem to login. There's an error"
Me: *sighs and thinks "at least give me that FUCKING error message then." *kindly replies with asking if they could send me the error message*
"Here it is. I don't understand what is going wrong
and what I have to do"
Me: *looks at error message*
"Invalid customer ID. Please make sure that your ID is correct. You can find it in the activation email we sent you when you registered".
😐 😶 😦
Me: *thinking okay what the fuck, are you fucking retarded or something?*
Me: *kindly replies: "It seems that you are not using the correct customer ID. You might want to look for it in the activation email we sent you!"*
"Oh okay thanks, how did you figure that out?"
Me: 😵 😐 😶 😭 🔫
Seriously what the actual fucking fuck.27 -
Friend: Man you're a programmer why aren't you a billionaire already like the others??
Me: It's not that easy believe me.
Friend: I have a great idea for an app something like facebook...can be that hard?
Me: :/
Friend: you could do that instead of your no pay opensource shit...
Me: FUCK YOU AND YOUR STUPID BULLLLLSHIT GO FUCKING DIE YOU PIECE OF SHIT !!!! YOU HAVE NO FUCKING CLUE ..STUPID SON OF A BITCH.32 -
Too much stupid today..
Client: "Our server is almost full, fix it"
Me: "Okay, you can upgrade the VM, or I can see if theres anything that can be cleaned up?"
C: "Clean it up"
Me: *Finds 5 extra MySQL DB's that amount to 50-60GB in total*
Me: "Well I can remove some of your extra databases, and some of the local backups, as they're also backed up offsite. They're currently unused and dated back to the beginning of 2017, everything is out of date anyways."
C: "No"
Me: "Okay, is there a reason?"
C: "No"
Me: "Okay, so we'll upgrade the VM?"
C: "No"
Me: "I'm sorry, but those are really your two options"
C: "Just fix it"
...................
...................
...................
What in the ducking fuck !@#$#%?
If you're so fuggin smart, then why do they pay me?
I'm clearly stupid and unable to read your mind.21 -
The most stupid question you can ask at an open source software event?
"So, this system, is it open source?"
I asked this to a guy at a stand about the system he was presenting (forgot the project name).
He stared at me with a wtf face and then replied with "....yes.... of course.... this is an OPEN SOURCE software event?!"
I felt quite fucking stupid.12 -
Designer: can we put the popup at the top of the screen?
Me: You mean op top of the navigation?
Designer: Yeah.
Me: I sure can. Would be stupid to block off the site navigation with a popup, but definately possible.
Designer: Cool, let me know when done!
Me: ....
Me: I am done.
Designer: Well now I can't click on the navigation anymore.
Me: That's correct. Let me know when you want to change it again.13 -
Me: *types "recursion" into google*
Google: Did you mean: recursion
Me: *clicks the suggestion, even tho I see no error*
Google: Did you mean: recursion
Me: ohh I see. I feel stupid6 -
This should not be called wisdom teeth, should be called stupid teeth
Mother fucker is growing perpendicular.
What fuck is wrong with you bro , grow upwards you dumb fuck!!
45 -
FUCK YOU TOO COFFEE MACHINE!
HANDING ME YOUR STUPID FUCKING SHITTY WATER BACK. YOU'RE SUPPOSED BREW SOME FUCKING COFFEE TO FUCKING MAKE ME AWAKE WITH ONE FUCKING HOUR OF SLEEP NOT PISS IN MY CUP!
I'll just go back to bed...5 -
Wife - my site is not working, everything in the code looks correct. But it is only throwing me 404 all over
Me - "blaming the teacher for giving bad shit"
Wife after googling - I fixed it, you have forgot to enable .htaccess in the virtualhost
FFS how long have I been this stupid?12 -
So, I'm programming a control system for a prototype aerospace vehicle. You know, the stuff that needs to work to prevent falling out of the sky.
Anyway, test day was today (was -- not anymore). Wiring all the electronics, everything is actuating and works well. Except for one part, a little thruster for stability.
I spent hours - literally, fucking hours - trying to fix the problem. Wrong address? Wrong syntax? I had absolutely no clue what was wrong. Queue the hardware guy, $stupid:
$stupid: "How have you not got it working yet?!"
$me: "I don't know, everything I'm trying isn't working. I've spent hours digging through this code and nothing is fucking working."
$stupid: "Well have you set it up for the new thruster?"
$me: "What...What new thruster?"
$stupid: "Oh, the one we installed this morning, did noone tell you?"
WHY WOULDN'T YOU TELL ME THIS?! COMMUNICATION 101!6 -
Me: “I’m gonna rebuild this site from the ground up.”
Also me, 5 minutes into it: “Can’t figure out this stupid CSS thing I need to do. Gonna take a quick break.”
Also also me, looking at it 5 days later:
5 -
Everytime they force me to add and test stupid features. I usually end up making my own version, which they dump almost every time.
2 -
Fuck stupid client.
Sorry:
Boss: client want to white label the solution.
Me: ok. They just need to create A record and send as SSL certificate and I will do it.
Client : here is your SSL certificate.
Me: spend whole night to make the transfer and setup server and check whole solutions one by one for reference to our company.
Next day wake around 2 pm to 100 whatsapp message, call from client and noss.
Turns out client IT team revoked the certificate without informing and the product stop working for all people.
Me: go to back to sleep.7 -
Interviewer: How will you solve the travelling salesman problem?
Me: *explains the solution on whiteboard*
Interviewer: It is slow. Can you do it in linear time at least?
Me: It is NP hard so it is not possible. For a restricted case, it may be possible
Interviewer: You are stupid. Do not apply again.7 -
tl;dr stupid clients with their stupid requirements.
Client: (on Monday) hypothetically could you implement "A"?
Me: (on Monday) yeah I could do that by Friday, let me know if you want me to start it.
Client: (on Thursday) hey remember we talked about "A" well do "B" instead and I'll need it by Friday still.
Me: "B" is completely different than "A" and will take probably twice as long.
Client: but you told me you could do it by Friday.
Me: ............ I want to smash your face.4 -
HR: why you want to work with us.
Me inside: you stupid, because you need my skills and I need your stupid money, stop reading articles about stupid interview questions.
Me: because I love to work on such amazing environment, and I really love the technology you're using.5 -
Dev: I'm going to a engineering and robotics seminar this weekend
Manager: Stupid. Waste of time.
Dev: I also got invited to go to a 2 day tech and innovation conference
Manager: Another a stupid waste of time.
Dev: The CEO's son invited me and is paying for it, he said he thought it would be interesting to me.
Manager: ...Well as long as it's not on company time
Dev: It is on company time, I won't have time for tickets
Manager: WHAT!? YOU HAVE TO SAY NO, WE ARE BUSY!! WE CAN'T NOT HAVE YOU FOR 2 DAYS.
Dev: Duely noted you said that and you think the whole idea is stupid. Take it up with him I already RSVP'd yes.
Manager: 😡😡😡😡😡😡7 -
my co-web devs just introduced me to css grids.
I feel so stupid for not knowing this, how long has this been here? HOW COME I MISSED OUT ON CSS GRIDS
12 -
Someone on a Facebook group asking how they can make a video auto-play with sound at maximum when a visitor hits the home page.
Me: Here’s how: Log into your site via SSH and cd to the docroot. Type “rm -rf” and hit Enter. Then throw your laptop in the river and go work at McDonald’s. Because if you are stupid enough to ask this question, you are too stupid to be allowed to own a website.7 -
Stupid tech guy: "You should use Windows, it's bettter"
Me: "No i quit Windows and use Linux"
At the end of the day he updates Windows and got a BSOD...
I laughed and walked off8 -
If Katie calls one more time, I'll hunt her down.
I said I don't want to be on your stupid caller's list. She said okay, then proceeds to call me 50 more times today.9 -
Argh!
Me: "Are these Os or 0s? In this shit font they look totally the same!"
Me tries to gess if they look more like circles or eggs.
Me remembers that there are no Os in hex numbers.
Me: "Stupid me! Better go to bed now..."2 -
Gets an email from office facilities.
Email - A package has been received under your name, please collect it at the mail room in the 5th floor.
Me (excited as hell) - Yay! My devRant stickers are finally here!!!!
Gets to the mail room as fast as she could only to find that the stupid package was a stupid promotional offer from a stupid bank sending me a stupid credit card that I never even asked for. That entire day was a disappointment :-(
When am I getting my stickers! It's been ages!7 -
I really like JS, but sometimes it's just incredibly stupid.
NaN stands for Not-A-Number
typeof NaN
> 'number'
why are you doing this to me8 -
I didnt make my root partition big enough fuuuuuuuuck
Stupid fucking tutorial said "10GB should be enough!"
Should have listened to myself. Fuck me.18 -
Me: How big do you want the banner to be (in pixels)?
Client: Mhhh... do default size
DEFINE 'DEFAULT SIZE' STUPID MORON9 -
Le me at the end of an interview
Recruiter: What is your salary expectations
*trying to find a good number but without exaggeration*
Me: well, about x USD.
Recruiter: that's ok for us.
Me inside: oh I should asked more than that! Stupid me.6 -
After pissing me off for month or so with it's stupid bsods I've decided it's time to move on. Fuck windows.
7 -
This fucking stupid asshole developer, wrote every single SQL execution with string formatting. Made me a full sleepless night fixing this shit. Isn’t this a classical SQL injection sample?
15 -
You dumb, stupid fucking idiot.
Yes, that's me. Spent an hour debugging something, only to find out I wasn't paying attention when going through the API ref. Fucking fuck. Such a waste of time.2 -
"Im gonna buy an Titan V for gaming!"
-Le "Friend" of mine
me:
A Titan V is for research and AI Applications...
Le "Friend"
Ayy u stupid Titan V best card!!!11!
Fuck this shit im fucking out of here...4 -
When someone asks me a stupid question,
I always answer:
You have the Knowledge of the Entire world and human race in your pocket,
FUCKING USE IT! DONT ASK ME! GOOGLE IT! BING IT! WHATEVER! JUST DONT ASK ME!1 -
Him: Relation databases are stupid; SQL injections, complex relationships, redundant syntax and so much more!
Me: so what should we use instead? Mongo, redis, some other fancy new db?
Him: no, I have this class in Java, it loads all the data into memory and handles transfers with http.
Me: ...... Bye!5 -
Me: "What a stupid piece of shit documentation and software, it does not work!!!!!!!"
Also me: "Oh, this typo made everything _not-work_"4 -
People: "N00bPancakes! Your code broke something!"
Me: "Holy leaky diaper, I had a weird feeling about that code!!!! Stupid me!!! I'll get on that!!!"
-furious clicking-
Me: "How could this even .. .wait a second..."
- reverts last merge -
- still broken -
Me: "See I knew it wasn't my code...."
(´◔౪◔)3 -
I hate it when you have non-developer friends because still to this day after 16 years they still ask me what do I do with their stupid confused faces. Bloody muggles.3
-
me: "ugh frontend is so stupid, i wish i only did backend"
also me: "i should be working on backend, but i just added some dopeass icons to my website"2 -
So ... Facebook somehow found out I used a 'fake' rear name and forced me to switch it back ...
So now they can again sell my data, and I am again haunted by stupid ads I don't want ...
Fucking Zuckerberg!!!!52 -
You motherfucking piece of shit application form...
I was filling a long form in a tab and I had another part of that form open in another tab.
They fucking logged me out of the 2nd tab and didn't notify or prevent me from filling up hundreds of fields in the 1st tab.
Now I have to fill them up again.
Fuck you and your stupid form. Die in hell you fucking stupid cunt. -
What's the most stupid/raging way you broke a device ?
Me? I fell asleep in my bed, while reading some rants.. on my fucking phone and broke it while sleeping on it18 -
Guys, please help me answer this intellectual being. The more stupid the answer, the better. Even better is if there is like a fake loooooonnnngggg step by step guide of it. NB: tafadhali == please.
21 -
I forgot my chargers for both my phone and my laptop at home 🤦♀
My phone is on 13% and my laptop on 35%.
I rely too much on technology ...6 -
Q: Why isn't it working after a whole fucking day of trying?
A: Because I'm a fucking idiot. That's why!3 -
She : You spend your whole day with your stupid computer ! That dumb machine is more important to you than me. We are done 😡
Me : Babe, I swear to God, you'll always be number one on my priority list.
She : Aww.. love you so much 😚
Me in mind : This must be the reason behind foundation of 0 index for Devs.1 -
Well... I feel insanely stupid because I've been using windows for years an just realised that the file system isn't case sensitive... Mother fuckers...
(Yes judge me, I am a twat)7 -
Are programming related questions welcomed here? My stupid fucking questions always get downvoted at Stackoverflow and I feel discouraged and frustrated and just plain so stupid which don't really help me learn. . .15
-
Hours spent figuring how a select (dropdown) was created plus the whole flow of an app.
Me: "They won't be so stupid to get the whole html via ajax"
Me: *facepalms" they did
Me: Discovers the ajax call is handle via a giant switch statement
Me: All html is handled in memory
Me: Discovers the now Director of Development did it
Me: *Dev Rants*
You: Check my previous rant and confirm it
8 -
When I code for myself I do all the naming in German only. Mainly because that's how I can see directly if that stupid mess is done by me or the framework.9
-
a little confession: i've rarely used test suites in my projects (due to laziness and lack of time).
i've started a new project and now i HAD to write tests in order to make my PM happy.
Then i had to refactor a lot of code.
IT WAS SO EASY WITH TESTS.
I WAS A FOOL.
STUPID PAST ME, STUPID!5 -
Shit that annoys me: People use the store (insert google play/apple/other) rating with one star to ask questions instead of fucking filling the stupid contact form or send an email to tech support.2
-
anyone else feel bullied when they put something on stack overflow for help
I'm just learning C++ for internship and they're so harsh and make me feel stupid :(11 -
Stupid javascript.
Stupid hoisting-oblivious "frontend devs."
Stupid browser-specific javascript behavior.
Stupid thrown-together javascript minifier that literally only strips out whitespace and comments.
Stupid poorly-written javascript spamming my api.
Time to rewrite it. Grumble grumble. Soo not how I wanted to spend my morning-turn-afternoon.
Leading to the last but not least:
Stupid me forgetting javascript's quirks.11 -
Once I was coding a pool game, and didn't know why the white ball kept on going on forever. It was 4AM, so I was already a little tired as you can imagine.
The glitch came from the fact that I had designed a whole polynomial function to imitate the deceleration of the ball... I replaced it with two lines: one creating speed and deceleration value, and another one subtracting the deceleration value until speed was zero. And then I went to sleep.6 -
You stupid shit jerk fucks.
Your request to disable the coming soon mode was hours ago. Of course google will show you coming soon text when you searched for it. It is not like google is under my arse or something.
And what do you mean it is not showing up on YAHOO!
Who the hell is still using YAHOO! ?
And that YAHOO! showed me that coming soon text result just like GOOGLE when I tried. So why is it not showing that to you? Oh right, maybe because you are old and stupid.
Today is already busy enough with packing our stuffs, stop giving us stupid tasks to fix.1 -
Fucking stupid bitch comes to me at 7 pm and asks an impossible task and after I clearly explain and say that I don't know how I gonna do it she asks it for early tomorrow...
Yeah, keep waiting...4 -
Me. Everyday. I was actually fired for “unprofessional conduct.” Apparently screaming fuck at everyone and telling them to get fucked when they’re being stupid isn’t professional.
I like to think of my behavior as “informal.” 😉7 -
Started working at 3:30am today.
That either means I am dedicated or stupid. Maybe both.
For sure, my boss doesn't appreciate it, so I guess that makes me stupid then :)5 -
IT Head: Hey, can you check out why application X isn't working? I've already restarted it and it isn't working anymore.
Me: sure.
Me 20 mins later: hey, looks like it is all good, website is normal, server resources are normal, etc...
IT Head: no no, the windows sync app isn't working.
Me inside: are you fucking kidding me you piece of stupid shit? Quit IT for good and die.3 -
I was struggling with a task on a project and decided to call the colleague, who's working on this project as well (he built it, I am just on-boarding) to get some advice.
Literally the first thing he asked me was: "have you seen whom this task is assigned to?"
Fuck! So I spent about 1.5 hours on not finishing a task that I shouldn't have worked on in the first place. Great.5 -
*logs in to pc*
- Your password will expire in 3 days. Consider changing it.
+ yeah sure...
*tries to change password*
- Your password must be different from your old 25 passwords
+ ....
+ What the fuck?!? I mean, really, what the fuck is this bullshit? You force me to use EXACTLY 8 char long passwords and this? Fuck you!5 -
Having an philosophy exam in less than six hours. It's 2 am. Laying in bed, thinking about that stupid DNS bug and how to fix it. I have 4 1/2 hours of sleep left - wish me luck ¯\_(ツ)_/¯4
-
Worst part:
Either "Can you fix my PC, it won't start"
Or "Can you hack <some instance here> for me because <some stupid reason>1 -
So, I'm the only iOS developer in the company working on this stupid app which is never going to succeed because the client idea is just plain stupid. Anyway, 6 months developing this crap, countless iterations, trillions of so-called retard "features", and now that we are almost there to go into production my PM decides it's a great moment to document every aspect of what was done and asks me to do it. Now I have 3 documents to write and around 80 bugs to review before Friday. Stupid me for thinking he didn't waste 6 months doing absolutely nothing while I was working 12 hrs a day to meet deadlines.2
-
I feel quite stupid asking this but what on earth is eng in English? In dutch it means scary but I don't think that that applies here 😄
(Translation services gave me the exact same word)11 -
Pausing music because I have to concentrate on a test case like crazy.
3 hours later...
Wait? Why don't I listen to music?
Ah I muted it like 3 hours ago :-/1 -
My girl friend broke up with me few days ago without any solid reason. Today i stopped her and ask her why she broke up with me and she started giving stupid reasons whereas she was the one who was actually guilty of those accusations.
24 -
Today I wrote a mail to the company to record two weeks of illness. Now, the mail started off being about my holidays in a few weeks, but I decided to write the illness mail first. Stupid me forgot to change the subject from "holidays" to "illness"... I'm so fucked. Wish me luck!2
-
*Le me posting a rant on devRant
*Le Rant gets no ++1 for a while
*Yup it was stupid one, delete it4 -
Short one, but it really gets me every time:
PLEASE tell me that I am not the only one typing hex-numbers in all caps!!!
I literally can't stand to see them in lowercase!!!
Every code I use with hex numbers in it (primarily ASM and C) I HAVE TO convert them into uppercase!!!
Is it just me and my stupid OCD or are there other ones like me????10 -
I REALLY HATE IIS. IT IS THE STUPIDEST FUCKING PLATFORM. FUCK. WHERE THE FUCK ARE MY FUCKING ERROR LOGS YOU STUPID PIECE OF FUCKING CRAP. FUCKING KILL ME YOU STUPID SERVER ASS BITCH CUNT2
-
Yeah I'm an adult. No, it doesn't bother me that 6 years ago on the school trip I wasn't cool enough to be invited to the girls rooms eventhough my stupid friend was. Doesn't bother me one bit7
-
I'm on my first free lance project, and devRant asks me for my horror story. -_-
Well, I undersold myself and gave such a stupid time estimation. Fortunately, the client was smarter, and he wants just half the work in same time period and will still gave me the same amount xD1 -
Ideal job?
The one that give me a roof over my head.
And pays my bills.
And bring food on the table.
And give me a lot of free time for my hobbies.
And avoids me to discuss with stupid clients.
Ok, maybe the last one is a bit unrealistic..1 -
Normal human: Visits web store -> orders for product -> leaves store.
Me: Visits web store -> Stares at header -> Stares at logo -> Check if colors match -> Scroll to footer -> Frowns at ads -> Scroll back up -> Multi click product item for debounce -> Fuck i clicked twice but it added the product thrice -> Closes tab -> Drives to local store -> Purchase product -> leaves store.8 -
My internship is starting to make me feel really stupid
The issue seems easy but I literally have no clue what to do or even where to start. :(9 -
😯😂😂😂😂
Some times I open the production site and then try to make edits locally to fix a bug, only to realize that I was so stupid.1 -
Me: man, I really want to work on my project but I don't know what to do
Brain: You should document your code, it doesn't have a single fucking comment, you stupid lazy fuck
Me: oh ok, I will do that ...1 -
working in IT support sometimes makes me wonder if people are really that stupid or they try to test me if i am really stupid.4
-
I know I'm only an intern. But what in the actual sideways fuck. Are clients really this stupid?! They want to push the app into the app stores a week earlier AND add MORE functionality? FUUUUUCK ME.2
-
Minecraft mods get me into programming. I used to spend hours yelling at Eclipse for not making that stupid JAR file! 7 years later, I'm pursuing a career as someone who spends hours yelling at a CLI assembler for not making that stupid ISO file! Good times.2
-
So I did not notice that my google chrome had another window and I accidentally closed the 2 chrome windows in the wrong order. Now my 1st chrome window tabs are all gone. Stupid me 😅8
-
My standard response for any stupid questions. If you haven't tried it already then don't bother me.
8 -
My non-coding friends think i am an amazing developers as i can create landing pages and small websites and they sometimes come to me with stupid ideas for websites.3
-
Thanks stupid workmates who fuck up the project first and then 4 hours before the deadline tell you without any feelings "it's late, I'm going to sleep".
NO FUCK YOU GET YOUR ASS HERE AND START HELPING ME4 -
Ha ha! Fuck you Apple. Forced to use USB c after your stupid charger games every iphone release.
Its about time. You pricks keep forcing new chargers on me. I have a drawer full of obsolete chargers.18 -
Started a new job today.
They gave me a Mac.
Why in actual fuck is there no shortcut for the terminal? Took me half a day to get an iterm hotkey working only to find out it only works if you have a terminal open already.
Stupid apple. I want my mod+enter back.8 -
Hey...just wondering...
In Germany its quite common for M$ nazis to call Windows "Windoof" , which means Win-stupid...
I'm not aware of anything similar in English or other languages...And that can't be ;)
Enlighten me please!9 -
"OMG PLZ HELP NOBODY CAN CALL ME!!!¡¡ THIZ STUPID PHONE IS SO SHITTY"
Did you press anything?
"NOTHING I SWEAR!"
Yeah, I see that you are messing with the settings. Is that nothing to you?
I can understand that you accidentally navigate to the settings, but if you blame everything on your phone and lie to me, expect me to do the same.1 -
It continually never ceases to amaze me how many people ask me a question without doing the proper research beforehand. For instance, "How far is the Earth from Jupiter?" How am I supposed to know that? The only thing I'm going to do is Google it and then tell you anyway. Stop asking me stupid questions that you can easily search yourself!9
-
My dad once told me "Computers are stupid because they do what you tell them to do, not what you want them to do." and honestly that gets truer the more I mess with 'em.2
-
>Be me
>Notice cute girl in college
>Won't work because reptilian brain too stupid
>Girl needs help studying C
>Teach her C because I'm an idiot
>She turns out to be a bigger idiot, and has problems grasping FizzBuzz problems
>Thoroughly turned off
>Help her get 80% in semester end exam
>Breathe a sigh of relief, get back to usual schedule
>Girl admits to liking me
>Said that girl and I are not on similar wavelengths
>Girl asks me if I think she's stupid, and now is angry with me
>What did I do?15 -
Rant! I'm the only developer working in the company and everybody always comes to me and say, oh you are the IT guy can you fix my iPad?
F**$ no I can't... Stupid iPads..2 -
So this company wanted their site launched early..so I coded for 3 days straight, hardly a wink of sleep and I launched it by the new deadline they gave me. Then they send me screenshots of a million problems with CSS and I'm like...THATS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU RUSH YOU STUPID PRICKS2
-
For months I was weak and tired. All the stupid IT work drained me of power to develop cool stuff during the nights.
And then I discovered my wunderwaffe- machine capsule-espresso.
Oh boy that shit is amazing.3 -
GOD DAMN THE STUPID IPTABLES, aaaaah!
Today I learned that
iptables -I INPUT -i !lo -j DROP
and
iptables -I INPUT ! -i lo -j DROP
are two completely different rules, the first of which doesn't work (in ~99.9% of cases)
yet both pass and get added to the firewall. And both rules show exactly the same in the state listing (iptables -L -n -v).
And I was wondering why the hell the firewall wasn't working...8 -
That feeling when you view your older projects and see how distorted your code was, how much boilerplate code, realize how stupid you were.
Good to see how times have changed.
3 -
That's it. I'm fucking retarded. I'm just so fucking retarded. I'm so fucking supid, it makes me wonder why do I even keep trying. I'm not sure I even have the energy in my fingers to keep typing this stupid rant.
I've been banging my head against this stupid fucking issue for A WEEK. Digging into the documentation, trying different library versions, trying to move stuff around even if it didn't make sense, trying to use different approaches because maybe I was missing something, or maybe I didn't understand some concept.
Surely spawning a child function from a parent can't be that hard, right?
Nothing.
Even tried it on a different OS - who knows, maybe it's Windows doing some if its magic fuckery?
Still nothing.
"Wait, why am I calling this function directly instead of calling its parent?"8 -
Customers are so fucking stupid.
You're already on the page with a form with a "password" field and a fucking "save" button. WHY ARE YOU STILL ASKING ME HOW TO CHANGE YOUR FUCKING PASSWORD???
FUCKING STUPID CUSTOMER WHY DON'T YOUR FUCKING KILL YOURSELF???
FUCK!2 -
Me: Writing an amazing code
Client: say nothing
Me: making a stupid bug, the client complains, I fix it instantly
Client: WOW you're amaizing3 -
Dear past me,
never ever offer a customer to rename their databases during migration.
Renaming databases in mysql is evil and will cost you more time than you think,
sincerely, my present me.
Ugh, stupid triggers and procedures >_>1 -
My fucking stupid idiot neighbor is replaying the same song since morning at max volume. It's killing me! Where can i buy a machete and wipe out this moron's genes from the earth?10
-
I am both happy and sad looking at the code I wrote some time back. It makes me realize how much I have learned and at the same time how stupid I was.1
-
it was not a technical interview.
just screening.
guy: tell me smth about redis.
me: key value, in memory storage.
guy: more
me: umm, the concept is similar to localStorage in browsers, key value storage, kinda in memory.
guy: so we use redis in browsers?
me: no, I mean the high level concept is similar.
guy: (internally: stupid, fail).3 -
Before internship, js code with semicolons looked stupid to me. Then jshint happened and here I am at 3AM in the morning, adding semicolons to a forgotten but not abandoned design project of mine!
-
First day went great. Got my laptop all set up. I still have no idea what I’m doing. Imposter syndrome really set in as of yesterday. Looking at the code base and seeing all of the code made me feel stupid. I understand I won’t know the whole code base.
It’s also my first developer job. I just feel stupid. I’m super eager to learn. But I feel like I’m going to ask a lot of stupid questions as well.
Idk how to feel. I guess a fraud would be the right answer? How can I get more comfortable at my new and first developer job?8 -
I don't know if this is happening to everyone, but attempting to download Android Studio right now sends me to a 404 page.
Android development is so fucking stupid that even trying to develop for them is fucking broken6 -
I'm stuck in road traffic and it's giving me headache, i wish every driver knows at least FIFO rule, if it's on a computer the CPU will quit his job because of all those stupid processes :/
-
Me: "I'll use my old laptop as a server to access via SSH to do my Docker Tests. I don't wanna use Keyboard and Screen. So, I'll set up Debian Server"
Also me: "Oh, full disk encryption with a preboot Login required. That's such a GOOD idea"
Introducing: Stupid me 🤗 -
fuck this!
spent an hour trying get my website working (on a raspberry) ... no errors, dev tools gave nothing, php gives nothing mySQL related... weird.. debugged my code for an hour when it me... db on my pc for testing is not the same one as the "production" server. i am so fucking stupid... i need some sleep3 -
Opened firefox twice infront of boss and had devRant as the active tab, I hope he didn't notice, but I doubt T_T
I will only know if I saw a rant about me, other than that I think I'm good :313 -
I fcking hate when my friends come to me for restoring his stupid blocked accounts like Instagram, Facebook, Google etc... OMG I'm a fcking computer technician not a hacker1
-
took me 20min to realize why windows wasn't recognising my flash drive:
it wasn't the usb stick I plugged in but the mouse's dongle... stupid me😜 -
Stupid !
Just 1 cup of cappaccino can make me stay awake the whole night :/
2 nights no sleep , not gonna get anymore caffeine tonight !3 -
My LinkedIn status is set to "not interested for work offers" so recruiters won't bother me. So I thought..
Recruiters be like: well screw that, I'll use the connect button and push my stupid generic message into his face anyways.7 -
...
Person me = new Person();
me.setAge(20);
int newAge = me.getAge();
System.out.println("Happy birthday! " +me.getName+ "You are now " newAge+ " years old!");
Happy birthday to me!😎🎊🎉🍻
(Probably stupid code 😂)10 -
GIVE ME AN EXAMPLE OF A SINGLE FUCKING JOB REPLACED BY AI
JUST ONE
fucking rubes, touching around on their stupid iphone and laptop, pretty lights, colors, and sounds
"wow AI the future"
that's what most of reddit is to me
shut the fuck up22 -
Trying my luck for an A rank conference in like 3 months. Things are not done and anxiety will end me before then. 😑
Can't these stupid robots do their own thing without me and get published on my behalf? Shit is tiring! Arghhhhh5 -
If only this button could make this shitty work week end & launch me in to paradise. I've had it up to here with PMs, clients, sales and stupid people. Any one else? 😖🙋🏼👋🏼
4 -
It still amazes me that people willingly choose apple. After being given a MacBook for work, I sort of expected it to grow on me a bit. But no, it forces you to do everything in their stupid apple way. It is form over function in its purest form.11
-
The world is so stupid... An app called Die With Me works only under 5% battery and lets you chat anonymously... when the connection is lost its said "*Name* Is dead"
Really fucking stupid but worth a try... Why did i buy this ag1 -
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you hardly ever do any thinking and even on those rare occasions the results make me wish you hadn't tried.
-
when the client starts asking for so much stupid changes.
Me: Ok sur, I will email you about those changes and the estimate time.
Inside Me: I may look calm, but inside my mind I killed you 5 times with 5 different ways.1 -
Follow up to previous rant:
Now after I realised that I'm a stupid motherfucker, today was release day. Or so it was planned.
Because turned out my colleagues/supervisors didn't tell me to test the app on Android 6 devices and I was sure that if it ran on the device they gave me (which I assumed was the only device of our clients) it'd be sufficient.
Now it was tested on an android 6 device and crashed constantly.
Wow... I mean... Just wow... Now because I don't have a working android 6 device (a colleague of mine is on vacation and locked our development devices for a different app into a drawer) I have to get the emulator working which took me about 2 hours because that dumb shit face of a laptop first didn't have the android-sdk-root set (took me a good hour to realise) and then the kernel for the avds was missing.
Also: windows updates.
FUUUUUUUUUUUU....
(PS: yeah I should have tested it on various devices and made sure it worked on at least most of them without being told so. Another example for my stupidity.)
EDIT: Now I don't have enough disc space for the kernel I need to install. Absofuckingfantastic1 -
Sending webrequest to book car service, but the website isn't telling me if the request went through - just back to the same page with all info filled in. No error messages. Right now they either have 10 requests from me, or none. Stupid fucking site.3
-
Conversation in a debug meeting, after a series of confusing failures:
Senior dev: “This is stupid”
Junior dev: “Me too” -
Is inadequate a better word? how about stubborn lazy and stupid? Yeah, I think that sums me about up. Let's hope tomorrow is a better day... if that's even possible...
-
The worst interview, I'll say the worst questions I ever being asked by stupid interviewer is "Where is your remote server located?", well I said "are your kidding me???" 😂 😂 😂2
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I have a crush on my single, young manager. He sent me request on facebook recently, although he has befriended almost everyone in the office, I just can't stop thinking about him.
Please help me, give me good reasons that it's a stupid crush, I literally can't stop thinking about him.15 -
Having to use BlueJ makes me want to jump off a bridge. :)
Stupid fucking editor tells me I have errors in my code, even though it compiles without problems using the Java command.1 -
This stupid motherfucker just updated a dependency without even realising that it breaks everything, pushed it to the package manager and causes me almost 2 days debugging.
Nico nico wanna break your fucking knee2 -
I fucking hate everyone who sends me a voice message, Just text me motherfucker how can I find some info we discussed earlier, you want me to listen to all your stupid messages with your lazy ass voice to only find the shit I'm looking for.3
-
Come on bitch. Fucking tell me how programmers were better in the "old times".
People fucking died because of stupid race conditions and bad practices.
https://ru.wikipedia.org/wiki/...6 -
Only got 2h of sleep instead of my usual 5h. I'm a walking corpse and there are still 7h left until I can go home 😴
Stupid, calming water-flow sounds are going to bring me down4 -
Git is good. Even when I do stupid things like reset a commit I wasn't supposed to, it gives me the chance to fix those mistakes.
(Oops. !rant)1 -
SO is like my SO
Yells at me for asking stupid questions. Hates it when I don't Google first. Tells me I'm too vague. Shuts me up before I have the chance to ask.
At the end of the day I've accomplished nothing with my code.2 -
My paper just got rejected. Again. The first time it was expected. But for this journal, it wasn't supposed to be. Some of the reviewers' comments are stupid. (for eg. I mention a no-loss algorithm fir a game which, so his/her comment is like what's no-loss? , like are you fucking kidding me, if you don't know that, then why are you a reviewer in the first place)
Anyway now I don't know what to do. I'm looking for more journals but all have so high impact factors and I'm not even sure confident to submit again. Had a good mind to mail the editor in chief but well, I don't think it'd help. What do you guys think?
In the middle of another project, another paper, online courses, now this. I'm just done. I didn't go home as well. It's around four o' clock in the morning here, so noone here is awake.
Can anyone hear me?5 -
Me: So I'm going to study CS.
Dad: Are you going to be an engineer?
Me: Well I'll be a software engineer!
Dad: ???
Me: I'll write software for computers.
Dad: So you're not going to really be an engineer? So you are going to waste your life on those stupid computers... What did I do wrong.
😑😑😑 -
Coding chalenge.
So... Spent almost two hours to put this little device to work with the keypad.
The device is a arduino micro, special one that can work as mouse /keyboard or any kind of input on most devices (pc, Android phone,...)
The objective is to make a macro keypad to:
- Fast insert text
- Play sounds in games over voice chat.
Think of it like this, you start a new html file, press one key and all the base code is inserted.
So... Why so long? Tought was the hardware, tought the keypad could be set differently that most, code mistakes...
My error was all here, masked from the debugger by a if:
char keys[ROWS][COLS] = {
{'1','2','3','4'},
{'5','6','7','8'},
{'9','10','11','12'},
{'13','14','15','16'}
};
Easy to figure right? Only saw it after reading all the code twice.
9 -
I remember when I was going, I tried to delete system32 folder in windows because I was sure my pc has 64bit architecture...xD2
-
I am starting to get more and more ticked off when I google a language's function name, and the first result isn't the official documentation.
Come on, I don't care about some stupid article describing how a function works in 10 paragraphs, with modal windows all over the place annoying me about "subscribing to newsletter", cookies, registrations and so on.
I just need to find the stupid function description!6 -
Me: Bluetooth not connecting to headphones, turn off and on again
Bluetooth mouse: Bluetooth is off, now what you want me to do?
I wish this was a joke... Yes, I am that stupid.5 -
Getting oversea calls all of a sudden. If you’re trying to scam me, at least speak the local language and check local time.
Talking to me in a language I don’t understand at stupid o’clock doesn’t help your case...5 -
I see ads on marketing tools every fucking where.
Do I look stupid to you, Facebook and Google?
I don't fucking need them.
Who needs those stupid products anyway?
I even saw a reskinned XAMPP being marketed as 'local testing for your WordPress website', like what the actual fuck? Isn't that fucking scamming?
Oh, right. They were targeting WordPress monkies. Oh.
Anyway, please show me some more keyboards instead.
I've been in keyboard market for like 2 weeks you know.
Holy fuck. -
@Kimmax
Can you tell me how the application works?
I never heard of .NET core before, or am i just being stupid?3 -
Today, a customer complained about a bug. I checked their account: yup, there was a bug. I checked it on my machine... nothing. It took me about an hour to figure out that they were actually just not using the feature correctly. I'd understand this from a stupid customer, but me?! FML2
-
Stupid people who lack common sense and yet present themselves as inteligent species give me a MOTHERFCUKING HEADACHE.
People, fucking use your brains where you should and not where it's not needed.10 -
Just worked 12 hrs straight because the guy who earns more than twice my sallary (and ist currently on holiday in some fucking greek Island) ist to stupid to shit!!!!
This is unfair! You can not pay me very little because I am young and then give me all the responsibilities!!2 -
Solving a competitive coding problem.
Expected date format dd.mm.yyyy
My format dd:mm:yyyy
After spending some time on it, self cursing begins2 -
Customer service didn't want to refund a $40 late fee because their stupid website wouldn't accept payment and kept locking me out.
So I did $40 worth of talking to one of their supervisors.
Yep. I fillibustered customer service. -
I once got into a full argument with this guy who claimed that no-one would collect his usage data because he's not interesting enough.
He then called me stupid when I told him he was wrong.
7 -
Im new in my job now Im working for a half year and my boss is frequently saying to me that Iam stupid and useless.
I don't know but is this kind of normal?6 -
Decided to get rid of a system app but forgot to disable stupid System Integrity Protection (OS X stuff) first so it flipped back at me with a thousand of "Permission denied" errors.
Whispers behind me (it was in the public):
— What is he doing?
— I don't know. I think recompiling the kernel... -
tomorrow i have a presentation of a webapp but last night i decided to change the ui. i am not done yet and this frontend is driving me nuts.13
-
I tell friends ways to hack "jailed" devices to run linux or other custom software. Because they have no clue about such.. I do it for them.. -.- WHY DO I EVEN TELL THEM???
-
Developers who think spaces are better than tabs.
Seriously every editor other than Notepad lets you set how many spaces a tab is equal to. Stop trying to force your stupid 2 space tabs on me.4 -
Been reading about this mess called C# 8.... WHY THE FUCKING HELL DO YOU THINK ALLOWING FUCKING INTERFACES TO HAVE DEFAULT METHOD IMPLEMENTATIONS IS A FUCKING GOOD IDEA?
Just Can't wrap my head around this stupid idea... Help me out here fellas...5 -
So a guy told me about a problem he has, and I showed him a tool that I have built that solve his exact problem, but he answered "Nah thanks I am good".
What ? Why ? Are you stupid ? It's free3 -
Fuck I forgot to make a database export before I executed delete statements on a production database...
All went fine though. Nothing broke.5 -
So... the "boss" was getting really annoying asking for nonsense with a shitty attitude and for some stupid reason i said "I'm Mr. Meeseeks. Look at me!". The reference didn't click, but the insult was there.
That's a way to fuck things up. -
manually writing multiselector widget with jquery and javascript, because you need to be able hackily pass in metadata for some stupid fucking edge case that the previous generation didn't want to deal with
please euthanize me, i fucking hate frontend and im sure it hates me back3 -
When people mail me asking something i think is stupid question i reply with this pic,
(It is also my profile picture on Linq now) :(
-
It just struck me that by long-pressing backspace on the virtual keyboard I can use emoji.
I feel kind of stupid right now. 😶2 -
"You're invited to our invite only webinar on mobile application and mobile user experience development"
Cool, good on me now fuck off with stupid fucking webinars!1 -
" this person made me mad and blocked me after. You can hack their Facebook right... so I can get the last word "
No I can not. And even if I did posses the knowledge and ability to. Why should I care you were probably being stupid too to them.
I don't care to involve myself in petty people problems. Honestly If they blocked you that should be the end of it grow the fuck up.
It's 10 at night. Too late for people to be bothering me. Especially with stupid stuff.4 -
iOS 10 pulls this 3D Touch shit on me and they're dropping headphone jacks. What's next? Vegan iPhones? Gluten free home buttons? Over engineered shit. Nobody wants 3D Touch. It's stupid.3
-
[wk237 - how you know you got good at programming]
idk, i dont think im good, ive got to a point where i can just eyeball those stupid interview questions, which makes me happy, but thats just basic logic -
Ok people told me to make a collision library...um really stupid question but I’ve never tried that or thought of it. Thank you in advance but does anyone want to point me toward some nice resources... THANKS also I did ye classic aliases sudo to fucking2
-
Today has officially drained all the brain I didn't even have yesterday. Let's hope I get somewhere with this thing, or else all the brain I've wasted is going to be useless.
Also, fuck opencv's fisheye undistortion. Mofo, I don't have the camera params, how the fuck do you want me to give you your stupid kernel shit? Shut the fuck up from my face. Stupid hoebag.
... 😭😭😭😭😭 -
Gitlab keeps telling me that I should 'update ASAP' but I can't. What the fuck ubuntu is it too hard to upgrade someting to the latest version? Or am I just simply too stupid? Fuck!2
-
Fucking travel auditors and yous stupid rules for travel reports. I've sent you countless e-mails explaining the situation and you can't fucking read?! YOU told me how I was supposed to fill the report and I did it as you told me to, but dare to reject it?!
Fucking incompetent and useless morons, you ain't worth shit! Fuck you and your stupid travel report! -
rumor has it dfox and trogus are abandoning their jobs to prioritize adding stories to devRant.
i mean, a social network without stories? sounds incredibly stupid and irrational to me8 -
Someone tagged PEBCAK on here the other day and it reminded me that I have this printed and hanging in my cubicle. It helps me not break my computer when someone comes to me to help them with stupid things.
-
Fuck forced coding conventions in uni, especially if they are as stupid as Google's Java Conventions. They are a disgrace to nice code but we will have to use them going forward
Stupid spaces everywhere. Else on the same line, wtaf. And don't even get me started on indentation with fucking spaces. Tabs are superior in every single way fite me irl13 -
How do you guys deal with really stupid PMs? I had one ask me 3xs to call the client and send emails because he's lazy and doesn't know how to be a PM + he's dumber than a box of freaking rocks.4
-
Stupid project ideas pitched at me?
Well, basically everything my friends ever mentioned.
NO I don't wanna help you do shady things... and as soon as someone drops the word hacking I route the whole conversation to my inner /dev/null2 -
Headphones, best music playlists I have and a good cup of coffee.
Good for 4 hours straight of coding/planning if no one asks me to extinguish some stupid fire they made.2 -
The dev behind me just send some code changes to another dev because those two dont want (or are just too stupid) to merge their code with git...2
-
Fucking gdb with your stupid commands, showing me the memory allocation, shos me the data you stupid piece of shit, what is the value pointed by the pointer.
*Segmentation fault**core dumped*
Oh gdb! How much I missed you. Please don't ever leave me okay? -
I want to rant about 14yo me approaching css, cause I feel a lot like lately I am ranting a lot (irl mostly) and forgot we all start humbly.
- Be 14 yo me and start learning css
- Spend two hours trying to make a css file work
- Get angry at the file (the 14yo me lost his cool a lot) and say css is stupid
- Realise 1 and l have the same representation in the current font
- get bright red
- change that letter
- all works
- hide the face in the pillow and feel stupid
- no, I meant really stupid
Btw 14yo me you were right, css IS stupid, mostly due to inconsistencies and IE5 -
Screw Java. Spent the last two days in this language and it's driving me to fits. Tried making a generic function. Java can't seem to easily handle generic typed arrays. Java threw a fit when I converted an array function to an integer function. Java has all this stupid boilerplate code that you put on every stupid thing.
Programming in Java is about as pleasurable as running face first into a brick wall.2 -
man, every prediction about the day's work during standup makes me look stupid. I'll have to learn to shut the fuck up the hard way.2
-
I handle multiple projects at a time... Sometimes I feel stupid to mess up the basic syntax of Kotlin and Java.
So I made a stupid mistake in my code like this. I wrote this in Java file
" val something : String = "value"; " (which this is a Kotlin syntax, without knowing that I am coding in a Java file not Kotlin!
Oh stupid me~3 -
Can anyone tell me if is normal a design department earn more than a IT department??? Am I crazy or this is plain stupid???10
-
Be me.
Read corpo spam.
"It's good to KISS at work"
WTF.
Keep it short and simple.
WTF**2
It's "keep it simple, stupid"
"Keep is shot and simple" would be KIS-AS5 -
Oh shit! My previous rant is super stupid! Fuck me.
Its almost like:
isalpha (value);
And asking why are you putting the value if you already know. 😐 Now I understood it's General way of showing things. Noob issues! 😬
Now I understood how people overreact just because they didn't think for a second.
Stupid me. 🙈 -
My biggest insecurity as a developer:
A tester calling me stupid and I cannot make up a convincing argument in my defense.
I avoid dealing with testers 😋5 -
Have I told you all lately how much I hate your stupid 'free trial' bullshit that requires me to enter a credit card ? Have I ?
Hmm.
Maybe I have.3 -
So i fcked up a lot monday. I was working on ftp system and i had some problems, so i wanted to test on my own account.
What i didn't realise was that usermod -g group user
Overrides current users instead of adding them like
Usermod -G group user
So i overrided my users groups including root.
And the next day i logged in, my user didn't have sudo permission 😊
Luckily the owner had a friend with sudo which saved us. Because we only have 1 account which we me and the owner uses. -
I'm finally going on vacation, which is good, but I already know there will be many stupid people writing me endless private messages about them being banned or their server not working correctly BECAUSE OF THEIR OWN SCRIPTS and they will spam me like they usually do although I WRITE THEM I'm out of the office but they don't care since they don't have other things to do than COMPLAINING ALL DAY.
Geez okay, I got to calm down, I'm on vacation, don't want *that* to ruin my mood.
It was stupid to ban all those people for breaking the rules today though, should have waited another week, so guess this one is on me.1 -
I recently solved a ticket: 'make buttons on mobile more mobile-like'
...
stupid customer? no, it was stupid me :p -
man i fucking hate my company.
somehow the largest in the industry but fuck me are we retards at software engineering.
wrapping popular api's and not exposing basic functionality, only to hide them behind some stupid fucking enterprise abstraction for some fucking dumb reason
wrapping fundamental java objects like int into their own fucking enterprise int, like for fucking why?
and finally blocking chatgpt that allowed me to deal with half of this fucking enterprise hell
stupid fucking shit3 -
Stuck between: raging because the entire team lacks solid leadership which pisses me off. Makes it completely inefficient. I can't tell the boss about this because he'll just make me the lead and I'll end up having to do more fucking work.
Every time someone does something stupid my cortisol levels go through the roof.2 -
Hacktoberfest ist starting!
You can get a free Tshirt when contributing!
More info @ https://hacktoberfest.digitalocean.com/.........
btw I seem to be to stupid to find anything I could help with, so no shirt for me = /3 -
Someone save me from this fucking stupid corporate web based trainings and let me focus on more important shit like re-factoring my code (ohh joke) and/or writing something more code then going what i just mentioned above.
-
Worked on a project form 8AM-12midnight straight and wanted to copy the project somewhere else.
My stupid brain just shift + delated the whole working project.
lmk if it's just me or have any of you also done stupid mistakes like this?
Just so I can calm my bird brain and at least think of another career path.
4 -
It took me 5 hours today to configure some WiFi APs only to find out I'm too stupid for this shit and I misunderstood a setting which broke the whole thing.
After that realization it was done in a few minutes. -
So i kind of fucked up...
I am currently living out of town and only have my laptop and rpi with me. Wanting to try something new, i decided to challenge myself to only use linux until i get back home, but i also wanted a new distro. (Oh and btw my only internet connection is provided by my phone and tablet, which is used as a hotspot, and because i already used all of my monthly data on the tablet now i only have my phone and an unlimited 128kbps connection which turns into a decent connection only after 11pm)
I downloaded the distro image last night and was planning to install it today, so i shutdown the laptop immediately after the download finished). If only i remembered that i had already wiped the old linux partition containing GRUB.
So now i need to wait until 11 pm so i can download another image on my rpi and flash it to my usb drive. Fuck me...
I guess i'll relax until then.1 -
FUCK EVERYONE right now. Stupid business with vague information, stupid dev team making SHITTY code. STUPID AUTO CORRECT TRYING TO CENSOR ME!1
-
Maybe I'm stupid, but I'm annoyed that there are no good ways to debug Blazor WASM.
It doesn't help to tell me that I got a null value, unless the error tells me which of my 50 variables is causing it5 -
I HATE, HATE, HATE, HATE TEEN TITANS GO, IT RUINED TEEN TITANS FOR ME AND I HATE THOSE LITTLE STUPID DUMB VERSIONS OF THE ORIGINAL BETTER TEEN TITANS.
IT SHOULD'VE NEVER HAPPENED AND NEVER EXISTED AND I FUCKING HATE IT AND IT SUCKS!
WE SHOULD CANCEL TEEN TITANS GO AND RUIN THE PEOPLE WHO MADE IT AND DIRECTED ITS LIVES. I AM FILLED WITH HATRED AND RAGE, AND WHEN THEY MAKE THOSE STUPID UNFUNNY "JOKES" IT PISSES ME OFF AND MAKES ME WANT TO COMMIT MURDER! I AM SO PISSED OFF AFTER WATCHING AN EPISODE OF IT, THE CREATORS SHOULD BE SUED.
THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME AND ENJOY WHAT I HAVE TO SAY.4 -
1.Coworker wanting to do small talk
2.coworker hoeing me random things
3.coworker asking stupid questions1 -
Some clients are down right stupid, the guy send me a shortcut to a video to upload to a site, this is man who wants the WordPress user manual
-
Every time somone who i have nearly forgott about calls me. I know im gonne get a stupid IT or Tech question...
- Why is my internet slow?
- Can you make a better {xyz}.... for free?
- How can i make my computer faster
- Why does office/spotify/chrome crash?
- Can you teache me programming so i can get rich?
FUCK THEM!
Really, i've got more relevant stuff to do. If you wouldnt have killed all your braincells with smoking and drinking and did something with your life you wouldnt have to ask such stupid questions in the first place. And thanks for never contacting me in the past X years! -
Stupid shits, if I am converting this app from the VBA to a modern web app. Don't fucking suggest me copying and pasting tens of thousands of lines of shitty spaghetti code, into a new Web project.4
-
Something that absolutely drives me crazy is how there is no TreeView of my repositories in SourceTree... just the stupid scroll bar at the top! UGHH!!!
-
OK How do you guys overcome it when you guys "Hit the walls" when coding/programming?
ive been stuck to finding solution for some days,
AND I FEEL STUPID ALL THE TIME
dear seniors, please enlighten me!13 -
Yesterday Ibdid buy an iPhone. I did it to learn swift development and people started to tell me that it was stupid.
I know I could have just used my emulator on my Mac but I just do not want to, testings apps is better in their real envieonment
I hope you guys understand my point, I am getting tired of all this "you stupid iPhone owner" shit
PD: I regret nothing3 -
Today was the last day in a project that I've hated so much. But now I'm feeling kind of nostalgic. What the fuck is wrong with me?
-
I am in jvm hell. I have been given a task to add mockito tests. All the existing documentation concerning junit 4 is out of date. Need to use junit 5. All mockito tutorials are out of date. I thought mockito was stupid before junit 5. Now it is “really” stupid. The tutorials I am reading are shit. We have wandered into bleeding edge fucktardness. Kill me now.17
-
Fuck you javascript. You're the worst. Fuck you fuck you. Why I became a fucking frontend developer. Fuck me and my stupid idea to get hired as a...
Oh nvm found the bug. JS is za best.1 -
HOLY FUCK! How can you be that stupid , fuck me Im literally losing business as we speak
(Yes I tried to continue it) #dontgiveup3 -
hi guys im new with app development and i have small question because this is really stressful for me,when you guys learn recycler view for the first time is that hard?or am i being stupid because its hard for me10
-
Today my manager asked me to provide technical skills. I replied with 'spring boot, react...(did not mention java)'.
He replied to me saying 'you know spring boot without java?'
Am I stupid thinking he should understand that already by seeing spring boot?2 -
stupid stomach why cant you handle a little coffee huh like seriously bro. i need coffee to not be a zombie all day, please my dear stomach bro stop hurting me cause you are hurting us......8
-
Anybody in game industry? For me currently I am digging into some bullshit our smartest artists created, some guys just wrote their name in the commit log without any useful information, OK, OK, I know who you are already, please don't tell me your stupid name again thanks#YOURACCOUNTISYOURNAME!!!🙈🙉🙊
-
I am done with NetBeans! This damn fucking stupid shit of software 😤. PhpStorm let me feel I am in heaven 😍.
Today I have setuped new system. Pray for convincing my boss to fork some license for me within the next 30 days 🙏🙏🙏.1 -
Dear emailing list,
Do not send me a confirmation email to let me know that my cancellation to your stupid email list was successful. Fuck you. I don't believe you. -
When I first joined my company as a fresher, and learnt Shell, someone suggested me to write a script, which would be useful to me as well as help me learn, that would pull code from all the projects that the company has.
Today, the other fresher, asked me for it (he learnt shell after me)... So I shared it on github. I know its kinda stupid :P
https://github.com/AseedUsmani/...
Reviews?2 -
The theme files of this WordPress site I'm supposed to improve are completely and unnecessarily custom for a simple ecommerce site. I'm really regretting not spending some free time I had recently to better learn plugin programming to abstract out this functionality for this customer.
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You stupid tester first add you freaking requirements and not just put back stories on todo and say it's not finished. You are just testing how an web app works. We can also automate that process you know!!!!
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Oouh night, why u go so fast? I have to note all that ideas u fucking gave to me of that stupid 700 lines algorithm's issue. Be nice just fucking once or just pass it to day and let me fucking sleep!
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Could be a stupid question, but I'm asking anyway. If I have a Java application, it's legal for me to package dependencies in it's jar, right? (In this case GSON)5
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Never thought an underscore could bug me till today. Took me three hours to find out if I removed the underscore the form field would be required. Thanks stupid formhandler
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This bit of code I wrote made me outwardly laugh. I'm losing my mind over here, and my team will look down on me and the stupid shit I'm doing.
6 -
God people undoing good work that made a property function correctly drives me fucking nuts
Wtf is wrong with you stupid fucking people ! Do you all want to live in fucking trash heaps ???76 -
Was trying to solve an error for half an hour and it ended up me being stupid because I typed userame instead of username
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Feeling stupid as fuck in a group programming with our lead engineer (and Im the one driving). Tell me Im not useless :(1
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when you can clearly see an object property you want to access and check against in web browser debugger but you're too stupid to figure out how to get typescript let you access it in code
fuck you SyntheticElement< >
i hate front end and it hates me back
just let me look at target.nodeName1 -
Stupid Zkoss won't let me assign a UI component more than one parent. Instead of getting to use preexisting components I get to make copy/paste carbon copies. Shot my plans for code resusability to hell and back.
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@#&$%₩
Stupid fucking Astrobox, why won't you pick up the 3d printer anymore??
Why is this fucking piece of shit giving me issues every goddamn time I try to use it? Why?? -
Dear .Net developers.
I wrote this tonight:
https://github.com/Future-Forward-S...
Please let me know if I am extremely clever, or extremely stupid.
P.s. I know it's not exactly ports and adapters. Rename needed maybe.4 -
Hey everyone. Just thought you might need me a little pick me up about how stupid the whole world is:
https://youtu.be/hkDD03yeLnU1 -
Today wasted around 5 hours installing nginx, apache stills working and keeping listen on 80 port after uninstalling it reboot finally the thing was i dont change the fucking dns of the server and trying to connect to the domain 5 hours later tried to connect to the ip... Fuck my life1
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Trying to figure out what the API your company has been using does with 2 pages of documentation sucks! The explanation given to me was also pretty stupid: "So... you click here and then... uhm... this link, and uhm..."
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Damn some stupid moves can literally fuck you up.
I just moved to linux distros around 4 to 5 months back. And I have installed and reinstalled it many times. So I thought it's simple and cool af.
So last time when i installed Ubuntu 18.04 i had it installed it on SSD and mounted my home from HDD. I felt super awesome. It worked perfectoo! 😘
And now I had some issues with dual booting so i planned to resort it and make it clean.
So during the installation process there's a part where you gotta select where to installation path and all. Its been a long time since I did a clean installation and TBH i forgot the / and /home . So what i did I put / on my previously maintained home instead of putting it on the SSD.
Now I am FUCKED!
Guys never ever make this mistake. It's baaad. Reaaal bad!2 -
This is so fucking stupid. Fuck. When they log defects on jira for different issues on the same page but in different tickets I end up having merge conflicts with myself. Like are you fucking kidding me?
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I witness a lot of stupidity (programming related) in college, and my mind is constantly toggling between the following states:
* arguing with stupid people makes me look stupid too, so I should just ignore
* maybe I should educate them
* I am helpless - they won't listen to me
* what sins did I commit in my life that I have to see this
* what in the actual flying fuck are these idiots doing
* I AM STRESSED AND I NEED TO RELEASE IT1 -
> me when angry
" what the fuck you stupid dev stop doing crappy shit"
> me when trying to do stuff
#!/bin/bash set -e
echo "no please"
exit 0
I should stop blaming devs for doing crappy stuff -
I found out this week if I got into the early admit software engineering program at one of my top colleges but waiting for this stupid letter is slowly killing me!!!
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When the developers trust a stupid, laggy, buggy mobile emulator more than chrome emulator, seeing shit that's ONLY reproduceable in said emulator. Driving me fucking nuts.
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god i need more money... sigh and the whole 'oh he wants his own money too' yeah no shit.
motherfucking economic downturn, motherfucking stupid ruffneck baby touching garbage! fucking bitchy resentful stupid, retarded, ugly, bottom of the shallow side of the gene pool motherfuckers !
and their stupid whore young adult offspring !
and you know what reallllly gets me ?
my expectations from life, have yes fluctuated, but they were never really that inflated.
no shoveling shit
nothing that destroys me
everything that inflates my health and prolongs my life, youthfullness, libido, and frees me of toxic creatures pretending that everyone else is toxic because they're soulless meddling trifling underhanded backstabbing sadistic hateful trash !
and you know, a career in something i would consider meaningful would have been nice, but i'm fine with extra money, a woman and a place to live that i'll never have to worry about losing and people butting the fuck out of my affairs when their private lives are horrific to the extreme !7 -
Whelp, I guess it just one of those days. Keep making stupid mistakes at work. On the plus side my boss is really understanding and hasn't given me a bollocking.1
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I found someone to make some project with!
I thought finding side project partner is harder then being fullstack myself. Stupid me.1 -
time to head into javascript code testing, as i'm annoyed af of testing everything by hand whether my feature works and find the cause to some problems i have encountered
.... but first let me "npm init -y" and "npm i jest" (as the tutorial suggests) real quick in my git project ... whoops😯😐😶🤨 ... woah, ok ... 5000 added files, shit, dependencies 🙄... delete all ... git error😐😥
delete folder manually😪😅
resuming paused tutorial: "and if you've got a git repository, just install jest globally, do not do this in your repo!"
.... just happened to me😑😅2 -
IN THE NAME OF ALL THATS GOOD AND HOLY TELL ME HOW TO GET AWAY FROM THESECREATURES AND MOVE ON WITH FUCKING LIFE AND KEEP THEM FROM STEALING PROGRESS LIKE THE SUICIDAL STUPID CAPRICIOUS CHOMO PERVERTS THEY ARE !!!2
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Thanks sefuckalize-mock for not letting me insert 2 row,
Now Im replicating the whole sequelize module itself to stub shit for no reason idk fuck this why am I doing this for stupid unit testing -
so.
laptop
or
passport
or
handgun.
each has their merit.
all 3 have been stolen in the past.
that's probably your stupid game.
make someone look way to young to be me and put their picture on the passport. heh.13 -
If someone asking me stupid question
Someone: can you hack my gf social media?
Me: Are you a human? [ 10$^10£ - 0.5¥ = ?INR ]6 -
Incompetent bosses, open offices, stupid outfitting rules, ie compatibility mode, "fix me this", "explain me how does it work this app you've never used"
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