TLDR : I left a company which doesn't understand the concept of email id and passwords.

Me (trying to login to the alumni website) *no register user option*

Customer support - you've to click on forgot password to create an account.
Me - Wonderful

*clicks on reset password*
*enters employee id, name, email, father's name, DOB, date of joining , date of leaving, current city because apparently if I just enter my employee id it is as if they never knew me. Sigh*
*your password will be sent to your email id*

Me - okay. *waits for two weeks because I assumed someone will manually go and create my account and email me, considering the state of system. *

After two weeks,

Me - I still haven't received my password on email after I created my account. Can you please check?

After one week,

Customer support - you need to click on forget password if you forgot your password.

Me - *inventing new curse words* I have not forgot my password, I never received it in the first place!

After one week,
Customer support - yes you'll receive your password on your email id.

Me - *runs out of curse words* seriously dude?
* proceeds to reset password*
System - your password has been reset. Your new password will be sent to your email id. *apparently anyone can reset passwords if you have the employee id, which is an integer*

After a week

Me - Am I going to ever receive the password? I've tried generating passwords, resetting my password. I never get my passwords. What should I do!!

Customer support - yes you need to click on Forgot password.

Me - are you fucking kidding me!!!
You fuckers need to be fired and replaced by a FAQ page which has no question and just a single answer, because a peanut has higher IQ than you. For any questions you may have, just reset password. Goddammit idiots!
Also, which email id are you sending my passwords to?

Customer support - myname@oldcompany.com

Me - you do realize that this is the alumni website for the company. Alumni means ex members.
Being ex members, you can assume we don't have access to our company email ids obviously?

Customer support - yes.

Me - how am I supposed to get the password using my old email id then?

Customer support - you need to click on forgot password option.

I think I should probably move to the Himalayas for my anger management issues. Plus it'll be probably easier to throw idiots off a mountain.

!Rant

Support Call:
”our PC stick isn't booting up! Come and fix it! (angry)”

Me:
”The PC are meant to boot up whenever power is delivered to them. Are you sure your TVs are powered on?”

Support Call:
”Yes! I just pressed the power button on both TVs and it didn't turn on the PC sticks.”

Me:
”So you can confirm the TVs are on? Can you change the input and see what happens?”

Support Phone:
”Stop wasting my time and send someone down to fix it now! I told you it isn't working!”

Me:
”Ok, we will get someone out to you as soon as possible.”

Then a support guy drives 2 hours to their store.

When he gets there he realizes that the TVs power is connected to a light switch and they has the switch off!!!

He said ”can we turn on some lights so I can see behind the TV?” and then all the fucking TVs came on.

These are times when I fully understand the concept of “firing a customer”.

The customer sent an email saying ”the downtime for your product was unacceptable.” even after it was explained to them that the problem was them turning off the power.

These fucking idiots actually expect us to deliver products to display on TVs without fucking electricity to run them.

Let's quickly talk about idiots.

> A simpleton coworker of mine installed Ubuntu on his brand new ThinkPad with a touch screen.
> Asks me to show him the Linux games site I mentioned earlier.
> I see that he has no browser installed.
No Firefox, Chromium, Epiphany, etc.
> Now I know that he has a room temperature IQ and something moronic is going to happen.
Truth be said, I subliminally desired a terminal based browser.
> Then he fucking opens Wine and I shit you NOT! That thundercunt opens...
> Internet Explorer!
> I punched his screen.
> No longer a touch-screen laptop.

People are fucking idiots. Had agreed to a meeting on Monday morning at 9 with some generic startup. Agreed to listen to their pitch after they had bugged me with hundred phonecalls and emails. It happened that my kid got sick during the previous night and this being the only meeting I decided to work from home and stay with the kid. I sent an email at 2am as apologizing, canceling the meeting and proposing a new time for another day this week.

Well at 9am I get a call from reception that my guests have arrived. I call the contact and she's angry at me that I didn't show. When I asked about the email she snaps at me: I don't have time to read emails on Monday mornings.

Well I don't give a flying fuck about your shitty pitch. Go fucking peddle your shit somewhere else if you can't handle your affairs and start snapping at me. FUCK.

Well I was in search for an internship and there was this Remote one posted online giving Rs1000(14$) for a month.

All he wanted was a fully functional clone of Coursera with hosted on AWS with videos of around 2-3TB streaming from S3 in a month :)

I asked him about his AWS costs and he replied - "Use the Internship money I'm giving you it won't cost much."

Sorry, !dev-related.

Today I wake up tired. Mother barges into my room and tells me I should be already ready, takes time to fucking argue, then does some cleaning(As if I never do it or something), and this evening she starts arguing about that again and just disconnects the plug from my PC, telling me I shouldn't have gotten a person who takes preparing way longer than me and who also got out of the car when I was ready to take off late AND that I should apologise to her for speaking „in a rude manner“, when just a few seconds ago from that she hit me. That hit wasn't painful. It still was a hit, though. Do I have to say how angry I got? As if I needed that. I'm already having trouble with not wanting to kill myself for a whole week nonstop. And she tells me I have to apologise or I don't get my PC back. Oh, I haven't gotten to the best part: My birthday's coming really soon. A week and a day later. Beats me how I will have to force myself to smile like an idiot again just because the actual idiots cannot understand the shit they've done to my mind. So much so I may not be functioning at all if I stay with them much longer.

This combined with all my family telling me how insane I supposedly am etc.

I might try a photography school. My friend(who could be my twin), has been nagging me about trying it...

I need a job.

I need a fucking place away from these blood-sucking leeches.

I need to understand how my horrible self-esteem has potentially fucked my whole life up and how much nerves I wasted on my goddamn nuclear family.

I also need to learn to forgive myself.

Many more, but I will end this here.

Rule #1 of software engineering: assume your users are fucking idiots.

Stop buying domains that you don't use you fucking idiots. Can't find any domain for my new project. But none of them are being used. Fucking retards.

Why the hell do people call smartphones by Apple "iPhones"?! Whenever people call their phones iPhones I start calling my phone by the model number.

Idiots: Oh no! I've lot my iPhone 7s!
Me: Oh no! I've lost my Oppo A37f pink edition!

See, sounds stupid right? Imagine it in everyday life!

-We're packing for camp! You! Take your North Face N638 grey

-Done!

-You, other guy! You will ride your BMX X Black!

See? It does sound stupid!

TL;DR
If you're saying iPhone, you're a fucking idiot. (it's like saying Googling instead of searching the internet)

( rant || !rant ) && idiots
console.info( this.isLongRant );
console.warn( "contains strong language and wordpress" );

A friend of mine sent two of his "friends" to me because they wanted me to build a website for their new business (~idea).

So I had a meeting with them.

First of all they wanted me to have a look on the current (work in progress) site.
First impression of the frontend:
OH BOY!?

Well, imagine this:

- a 90s/2k background (dotted/pixelated cloud in baby-blueish as backgroud with repeat)

- the logo was made by the sister of one of the guys, it wasn't too bad, but badly aligned, asymmetrical

- some obvious $offTheShelfShopPlugin with $randomStockContent

- the fucking slider had a small loading bar to indicate changes, it appears like an hyperanxious child on ADHS

- below the logo TWO FUCKING GIF SPINNERS to indicate nothing else but how fucking brain amputated these two dudes are, including the dev who is responsible for adding this. (to this point, they only told me, that a webagency did the setup and some basic work on the site, more on that later)

- no styling concept at all, random fonts and stuff everywhere including default styles of the shop plugin.

- FUUUUUCK WTF wil come furtherin this meeting?

After seeing a pile of binary puke fisted out of a 60yo nonstop-intern who changed his jobtitle from dildo-traveling-salesman to fullstack-frontend-dev by wrinting it on a post-it-note, I imagined, there has to be something wrong with the backend as well.

Boy was I right!
Yes, you guessed it! A random Wordpress adminpanel login appeared! OH NO....
I really wanted to levae this meeting immediately.
I was not able to hold my disgust back and I told them right in their face, what a shit pile of nutty squirrel turds this current page is. And that Wordpress is not the right choice at all for a shop.

Then came the best part: They basically told me, that they terminated the previous contract with the webagency because they were too expensive (they are cheap, compared to others, I know people who know their prices) and that they wanted to create A BIG MARKETPKACE with multiple ressellers who can have their shop in their website. Something similar to FUCKING AMAZON. ON FUCKING WORDPRESS!?!?!?
They even asked me if I wanted to be their partner & developer and that they can't pay much at the moment until the marketplace starts to grow.

I more or less told them to go fuck themselves with a rusty pitchfork.

Okay so about a year ago these FUKKING IDIOTS decides, against my recommendation, to do this quick-ugly-hack and ninja it into production.
I tell them its a FUCKING BAD idea that will blow up in a year or so...
But no, just go go go!!!!!!!

Now a year later, shit blew up badly. A total FUCKING derail. These new idiots asks me to "fix the problem", the same fucking problem I predicted and warned them about a year ago. So now i have to clean up their ducking mess because "Nobody else knows how to fix it".
What the FUCKING HELL do we pay them fuckkkers to do?!!

New idiots you ask? Yep, because 3 out of the 4 original fucktards already left the place in order to go and make some other new collegues lives fucking miserable.

FUCK YOU FUCKING MOOTHERFUUUKKKEEERRRRRSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Reading programmer stuff on reddit:

"C# onlY woRkZ on MicRoSoft aNd m0n0 suCks"

Someone else:

"Dude, .net core has been out for a while what are you talking about?"

Them:

"OMg I diDNt Kn0W thaT!!"

Really guys?? Its been out forfuckingEver....

this is the thing. People talk shit, spread misinformation, and just looo amazingly ignorant without trying to figure shit out properly first.

Google sucks!
No, not as e-mail or for privacy reasons. Sure, that too, but it comes with "free" stuff.

It sucks because it's breaking every possible record in the worst, shittiest, most insanely stupid APIs and integrations out there on the entire fucking planet!

It is comically stupid!

Aside from their LOVE of hard-deprecating APIs every few months, requiring constant, time consuming maintenance of every tool that integrates deeply with Google services, some of their APIs, for expensive stuff, look like they've been written by Bobby McFartface from 7th grade.

Take a look at DoubleClick Search (their ad performance reporting tool, that sure does sound like one). To upload custom, additional data, you must pass in a ton of parameter, and they REQUIRE some of them to have a specific, hardcoded value. What's the point in passing that parameter then you dickheads?!
But fine, so you uploaded some stuff using the API. Now you want to delete everything and try again after you fixed a bug - well you fucking CAN'T! You can't delete stuff, you can only mark them as "deleted" using an update call.
Bulk operations? Fuck no!
Can I just add on top? Well of course not! That will raise a ton of exceptions. Same message should be transmitted using the PUT, not POST request, in order to edit.
Can I send everything to PUT? Of course not! You can't edit something that's not there, dummy!

Can I see what's there so that I can update it, and add what's missing?
Well of course not! Why on Earth would you need to see what information is in there after you uploaded it? Who needs that anyway?

Simply send, pray, and hope that everything will be fine (it will not).

Like holy fucking crap, it can't get any more stupid!
Google is a huge pile of idiots who feed on only a single cow - the search engine.

It's times like these when I think that Google right now is the worst thing that exists for everyone in tech. It's dragging everyone down with their monopolies everywhere and complete idiocy in managing them.

Fucking moronic clients like these make me want to drop the project, needless to say I dropped the project immediately. I know it's highly unethical but fuck it.

On top of that I was doing charity work by charging 1/8th of my usual rate and this fucking idiots thinks that he is teaching/spoonfeeding me for his project, moron, I made micro library for that much amount of money.

Loss is loss and integrity is integrity..

*rants to some people I met in a cafe about how irresponsible making a ground rail live is*

Girl: "well people do make mistakes, right"
Me: "but they shouldn't! It's civil engineering ffs!"
Girl: "that doesn't change the fact that it's impossible for people to not make mistakes"

*realizes that I'll have to explain redundancy*

Me: "okay, so I have 2 mail servers. If I make an inevitable mistake, during an update or so, it only affects one of the servers but not the other one. So service is uninterrupted."
Girl: "that's far too complicated and technical.. explain it more easily."
Me: "alright, what job do you have"
Girl: *tells her job*
Me: "alright, so imagine that you get sick or go on a holiday or something. When there's someone else in the company that's got the same skills, they can ensure that the job gets done regardless. That's redundancy."
Girl: "aah, still too complicated!!"

What the fuck?! I removed all of the technical stuff and it's still too complicated?! How willfully ignorant or plain stupid can you be?!! Well fuck her then, but not in the way of taking her home. Now guess why I don't really like the muggles in my town. Fucking idiots!!!

"But muh BuzzFeed, conspiracy theories, deferring updates because they hog my WiFi, and casual games on my iPhone"

FUCK!!! FUCK PEOPLE!!!

Me - Lately, been working on Node.js, its fun.
Friend - Oh but it doesnt scale well, I hate that language.
Me - why do you think so? and its a VM, JS is the language.
Friend - Cos it doesnt scale, i heard from others.
Me - wut.

I fucking hate people who fucking blindly hate a technology / programming language.
Motherfuck, whats with these idiots blindly hating languages?
Every lang has its own use cases, why cant these twats understand that.

You use a tech as per needs, its not a fucking make-up.

Why the hell do people make websites with VALID SSL certs redirect BACK TO HTTP? What the fuck is wrong with them?!

If you're going to add a fucking CAPTCHA to your already poorly-designed website, MAKE SURE IT FUCKING WORKS YOU FUCKING IDIOTS.

Stupid shitheads among the web designers, fucking listen up. Your fucking design is not the point of websites - the content is. You are not supposed to shove the content away to have your moron design shine in its purest debility.

Yeah I know, white space minimalism yadda yadda, clean interface - and you dumbasses just remove functionality to simulate a clean interface, to the point of using hamburger fuckups on desktop. Pull your heads out of your asses, that's not how to design an interface! Not to mention that you idiots still guzzle through the megabytes and dozens of domain lookups for your chickenshit minimalism.

While we're at it, not everyone is 20 years old like you youngsters - you won't believe it, but there is life beyond 40, and while such age is unthinkable to you because you are so dumb that you will hardly reach that age anyway, others on this planet have managed to get there. No 20/20 laser sight, you know.

Fuck you with your light grey thin fonts on white background because it looks "clean", it just SUCKS you wankers. Fuck you with your stupid ghost buttons that don't even look like a button. You know how to operate the shit you made, but reality check here, users spend most of their time on fucking other websites than on the abomination you have designed!

Get that into the shit bubble that you call your brain and read WCAG 2.1! That's not only for disabled people, but everyone will be able to use that shit better!

I love devRant. But the people constantly saying "Python is shit" OR "Windows is for idiots" OR "Never use C it's ancient" OR "Microsoft sucks" OR any other fucking subjective opinion that's absolutely worthless drive me crazy.

I see many people here asking "Should I do [option1] or [option2]?" And the only responses are "[option3 which is not a fucking option you degraded fuck who thinks his/her opinions somehow matter in this discussion while they are clearly NOT helping]"

Sorry but this place has "Rant" in it's name so I thought this would be appropriate.

Been a while since my last real proper rant.

Multiple projects. Business side going into panic mid. Devs are staying cool as usual.

We, devs, have to hold hands so they don't completely break down.

We are wasting precious time in order to rub their feelings.

Get. Your. Shit. Together.
Or atleast, go cry in a corner AND LET US FUCKING WORK.
STOP. FUCKING. SPAMMING.

Can't fucking work for more than 10 mins.
I go take a shit, I have 200 notifications when I'm back.

Omfg their lives must be so hard, really. How can you fucking go into full retard whenever there's a small roadblock.

DO. YOUR. FUCKING. JOB. And let me do mine.

As soon as you let us work, issues are going to be solved, you'll be less stressed and everything will be fine.

Keep asking the same questions over and over, arguing on non-critical things (who cares about wordings... it's 1min change) and the stress will only build up for everyone.

DAMN. Fuck off, fucking emotional idiots.

A lot of Project managers are idiots.
Here is what happened: I am a backend developer and was asked to replace some images on some website (not even sure this is supposed to be a backend task). So i did, changes went through review and then they were live.
A few hours later they come to me saying i made a mistake because the image has wrong color tone in one of the browsers (internally facepalming myself)... I didn't design the images nor made any changes to them... I just fucking uploaded the files that were sent to me... That's fucking it.
They blamed me for a design issue and how I should've noticed this issue blah blah blah... And i had to spend an entire fucking hour to explain to them step by step what i did, how i did it and why the color tone was wrong even though i am not a designer and my main tool is VISUAL FUCKING STUDIO AND NOT PHOTOSHOP.

The shit part is that the images were sent to us by the client, so really, it is their fucking fault not mine.
Oh, and they tried to guilt me by saying the client won't pay for this since the images are wrong.

Lost an hour to this bullshit.

Fuck that fucking company three way while dozens of homeless HIV crack junkies puke and shit their diarrhea on the three bosses!

I can't put it in words how stupid they are!

Let me try to tell you the latest story while I try not to get multiple strokes.

Backstory: We are three devs, all with a TCCI certification. One has been working for us for almost a year, the other one has been working for us since one and a half year. Both are good friends of mine, btw. I have been working there for almost three years.

Fortunately, I am allowed to work on a reasonable computer. The other devs work on PC's with Windows 7 and 8!

One has just 400 MB space left on his drive and has to delete every month some shit because he does not want to be able to call up websites anymore... How awful?!

The PC of the other great Dev Crashes three to six times a day and needs about 30 minutes to start up!

We can be so productive, but...

We told that in February one of our bosses and asked him to buy new hardware. His answer: yes, of course, I understand that, it's my turn (he always says that "ich bin da dran")

We got a new colleague in the middle of this fucking month. She is responsible for conception.

She works on an old notebook, but today she gets a fucking new PC to work on while the devs are trying to weld with a sparkler! Better hardware than every other Dev PC!!!

Guess what? She is the daughter of a friend of one of our bosses!

We are the only devs at this company.

Fuck that fucking company! Fuck that fucking bosses!

I think we don't go to work for that fucking company anymore!

Fucking kill me right now please. How the FUCK am I supposed to get any shit done when I'm learning something and the fucking DOCUMENTATION has been UNAVAILABLE for the past THREE MOTHERFUCKING DAYS.

GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER MICROSOFT.

Fucking idiots.

It wouldn't be so fucking bad if things like this didn't happen all the time.

But when EVERYTHING is FUCKED - ALL THE TIME, it kinda makes a person lose all hope in humanity and technology.

A typical motherfucking day for me:

Wake up
Go to work
Come home
Eat dinner (if I remember)
Attempt to code shit for 1 - 3 hours before I have to sleep
CAN'T FUCKING CODE SHIT BECAUSE:
1. Internet disconnects every 5 fucking minutes
2. DOCUMENTATION SITES ARE FUCKING DOWN
3. Shit Windows is UPDATING
4. a previous windows UPDATE has royally motherFUCKED my PC
5. etc

FUCK

TL;DR I'm fucking sick and tired of Devs cutting corners on security! Things can't be simply hidden a bit; security needs to be integral to your entire process and solution. Please learn from my story and be one of the good guys!

As I mentioned before my company used plain text passwords in a legacy app (was not allowed to fix it) and that we finally moved away from it. A big win! However not the end of our issues.

Those Idiot still use hardcoded passwords in code. A practice that almost resulted in a leak of the DB admin password when we had to publish a repo for deployment purposes. Luckily I didn't search and there is something like BFG repo cleaner.

I have tried to remedy this by providing a nice library to handle all kinds of config (easy config injection) and a default json file that is always ignored by git. Although this helped a lot they still remain idiots.
The first project in another language and boom hardcoded password. Dev said I'll just remove before going live. First of all I don't believe him. Second of all I asked from history? "No a commit will be good enough..."

Last week we had to fix a leak of copyrighted contend.
How did this happen you ask? Well the secure upload field was not used because they thought that the normal one was good enough. "It's fine as long the URL to the file is not published. Besides now we can also use it to upload files that need to be published here"
This is so fucking stupid on so many levels. NEVER MIX SECURE AND INSECURE CONTENT it is confusing and hard to maintain. Hiding behind a URL that thousands of people have access to is also not going to work. We have the proof now...
Will they learn? Maybe for a short while but I remain sceptic. I hope a few DevrRanters do!

This company has been a "start-up" for 5 years farming money off of fucking idiots using a shitty CMS.

- The senior dev gets paid 15/hr
- No use of version control or testing
- the CEO has no fucking knowledge about tech.

and you wonder why it's FAILING?! I'm surprised you guys stayed afloat this long, jesus fucking christ.

I FUCKING HATE PEOPLE WHO ALWAYS BUY NEW STUFF WHEN THEIR OLD THINGS WORK PERFECTLY FINE!
FFS PEOPLE ARE JUST FUCKING PIECES OF SHIT NOWADAYS! I MEAN, FIRST THEYRE LIKE, oh we need to save the planet bla bla.... THEN THEIR LIKE!
OMFG! NEW IPHONE X WOLOLO MUST HAVE! OMG MY OLD PHONE IS WORKING PERFECTLY FINE BUT ITS THE NEW IPHONE OMG!
I MEAN! COME FUCKING ON! WHAT IDIOTS! IF ITS WORKING, KEEP IT!
#NoHomo

One time was in a meeting with clients from abroad (big company with some offices in the US). After the meeting we went to a restaurant with the clients. Then one hour later our CEO shows up and starts tanking beers like crazy and gets super wasted. Then starts asking the client if they have a job for him in the US. He doesnt want to run his company anymore because all his employees are fuckung idiots blahblah. Then he asks me you understand right you have seen my employees they are fucking stupid. Uhm yeah dude I work for you... *awkward sillence, continues chugging beers, changes topic*

Call me old-fashioned, but... I kinda liked it back in the day, when Microsoft made proprietary software, the Community made free software and everyone's "cui bono" was quite easy to answer - even those corporations involved in FLOSS did have a clear way to finance themselves.

Now, we have Microsoft coming into open source, seemingly making projects better and offering more and more "free" stuff.

You know.

"Free" Windows 10.
"Free" SaaS Office.
"Free" "Private" Repos on Github.

In general - what happened to clear and concise "I give you money, you give me stuff" capitalism like we had it in the 2000s?

I'd rather pay 20 bucks for a game on Steam than get it "free" and with ads or microtransactions - yet, many games, especially mobile, don't even offer me that option. It wouldn't be that hard now, would it?

The same goes for software. That Canonical would need to fuck their users over after Ubuntu One went to shit was obvious - they didn't offer the kind of commercial/enterprise OS'es that Redhat or SuSE sell.

What people seem to forget is that everyone needs to make a profit somehow. You don't get "free" stuff. Even the volunteers in the Open Source Community get something out of it - an opportunity to pad their CV at least, if nothing else.

Nowadays, software manufacturers have the same legitimacy as the "free" financial "advisors" you find at banks - and who could be dumb enough to trust them? Oh yeah: Almost the entire fucking society is who.

But then again, sell something and noone will want it - because they all want it for free, with annoying, privacy-invading ads or with equally annoying microtransactions, or financing based on commission - so you don't only pay ONCE, you pay until you realize you got fucked over and quit.

Capitalism used to work until all those idiots stepped in. How the fuck don't people realize that there's no free lunch in life? When have we stopped being functional people and turned into idiots.

Even worse: Those idiots think that they're entitled to something! They, who volunteered to become merchandise instead of customers, think that they have rights! Do cattle have rights? Nope. They get their "free" hay everyday and I get to buy beef, that's how it works. Moo!

Hell, they are surprised when they get fucked over by bank salespeople or their data stolen by corporations, intelligence agencies or something... What did they expect, goodwill?

Can we please make Adam Smith mandatory reading in school?! I mean, give people a chance to understand capitalism? The nonexistent "goodwill" of traders in general?

I’m working for fucking idiots. Here is an actual conversation I had with my boss today.

Me: I checked the numbers, and barely anyone is using our app more than once. Not only is a minuscule amount of people downloading it (we have 300 downloads), but none of those people use it more than once. Use retention is important and we’re failing in that regard.

Boss: User retention doesn’t matter. Investors don’t care about that. Blah blah blah all we need is marketing blah blah. We just need a bunch of people to download once. That’s all that marketers care about....in fact, an potential investor himself told me that he doesn’t care (obvious lie)

Me: Well, can I talk to this investor? What’s his name? Is he in California or India/China?

Boss: oh you can’t be at the investor meeting. It’s high level. Just don’t worry about it. Trust me, I know what I’m talking about.

On the bright side, this whole exchange has motivated me even more in my quest to find a new job. And I guess it’s important to learn what not to do from idiots

I fucking hate people who tell me what i should do when they obviously dont know a fucking inch of anything related to the dev world fucking idiots ruining my day with fucking retarded orders.

I AM THE DEV UR THE FUCKING MANAGER STAY AT UR FUCKING PLACE

So this fucktard decided to write the most inefficient way to collect thousands of records.

The system I am working on allows users to book facilities. There is one feature where an admin can generate reports on the bookings made between any two dates. A report for bookings made between January and April generates 7878 records.

So this shithead, after making a call to the server and receiving 7878 records decides to put it through 4 fucking foreach loops (this takes around 44.94 seconds).

After doing that, he passes it to the controller to go through ANOTHER foreach loop to convert those records into a JSON string, using..string..manipulation. (this takes bloody 1 minute and 30 seconds).

Now, my dear, dear supervisor is asking me to fix this saying that there must be a typo somewhere. Typo my arse. This system has been up for more than a year. What have they been doing all this time??? Bloody hell. Fucking idiots everywhere. I now have to refactor
..fucking refactor.

This is more of a wishful thinking scenario......but language/tech stack/whatever bashing.

Look, I get it, we like development, we would not be here if we didn't like it. But as my good friend @Stuxnet has mentioned in the past, making this a personality trait is fucking retarded, lame, small, and overall pathetic. I agree with this sentiment 100%

Because of this a lot of people have form some sort of elitist viewpoint concerning the technologies that people use, be it Java, C#, C++, Rust, PHP, JS, whatever, the same circle jerk of bashing on shit just seems completely fucking retarded. I am hoping for a new mentality being that most of us are younger, even if you are a 50+ year old developer, maturity should give you a different perspective, but alas, immaturity and a bitchy attitude carried throughout years of self dick sucking implications would render this null.

I could not give two fucks if the dude next to me is coding his shit in whatever as long as best practices are followed, proper documentation is enforced, results are being brought to our customers(which regardless of how much you try to convince us, none of your customers are fucking elite level) and happiness is ensured, then so fucking be it.

Gripes bitches and complaints are understandable, I dislike a couple of things about my favorite tools, and often wish certain features be involved in my particular tech stacks, does this make stuff bad? no, does it make me or anyone else less of a developer,? no so why give a fuck? bitch when shit bites you in the ass when someone does not know what the fuck they are doing with a language that permits writing bullshit. Which to be honest ALL of them fucking allow. Not one is saved from this. But NOT knowing how to work a solution, or NOT understanding a tech stack does not give you AUTOMATIC FULL insight on how x technology operates, thinking as such is so fucking arrogant and annoying.

But I am getting tired of looking at posts from Timmy, a 18 year old "dev" from whothefuckcares bitch about shit when they have never even made a fucking penny out of their "development" endeavors just because they read some dickhead's opinion on the internet regarding x tech stack and believes that adopting their bullshit troll ass virgin ideas makes them l337.

Get your own fucking opinion on things, be aggressive and stand fucking straight, maybe get some fucking pussy(or dick, whatever) and for fucks's sake learn to interact with other fucking human beings, take a fucking run, play games, break out from your whinny bitch ass shell, talk to that person that intimidates you, take a run, do yoga, martial arts anything that would break you out from being such a small little bitch.

Just fucking do something that keeps you from shitting on people 24/7 365/ a year.

We used to bitch about incompetent managers, shit bosses, fucking ludicrous assignments. Retarded shit that some other dev did, etc, etc. Seems like every other fucking retard getting into this community starts with stupid ass JS/PHP/Python/Java/C#/ whatever jokes and you idiots keep upvoting that shit. Makes those n00bs gain credability. Fuck me shit is so pathetic.

basically, make dev rant great again.

No fuck off and have a beer, or tea or whatever y'all drink.

Fucking idiots. How fucking stupid are you? We're in 2016 now, where basically `.motherfuckerslutshitasscunt` has the potential to become a TLD. And you still can't validate a motherfucking *.online email? FUCK YOU. I will NOT be using your SHIT MOTHERFUCKING RECRUITMENT SERVICES. DIE.

Can someone tell who the fuck lets morons with absolutely 0 knowledge of how the industry works go on and write articles concerning "what programming languages to learn" clickbait articles?

Look, I never looked into them. Not even when starting, I knew (out of spite) that the people that built Windows Vista were developers and then I went ahead to look what a software engineer was. I went down the rabbit hole from that and my next step at the time (I was on the local library) was to go ahead and look for programming books, C++ and Java caught my eye, so I got them two books and went down. Later on I found about JS and Python and similar shit like that and I just continued to learn. I seldom bothered to learn from internet articles because to my opinion if I needed to read documentation then I might as well fucking read it from the people that designed X technology.

some were good, some were shit, etc etc, but I never bothered to look for "what programming languages to learn" articles because I could give close to two shits about some other dickhead telling me what to learn, I have always been rather hesitant to take other people's opinion into consideration when it comes to my own learning.

BUT today I clicked on one of those articles out of curiosity.....

"Many DEVELOPER (notice the lack of proper grammar) choose to leave Visual Basic in favor of more modern frameworks like C#, Java or .NET"

Ok, so, for whatever the fuck reason Java is mentioned along C# and a fucking framework (.NET) rather than just C# for microsoft shit, is this moron talking about VB.NET at all? is he going about VB6? what? what is going on here?

Obj C is not relevant at all and should be immediately replaced by Swift since it is a modern, and stable language (never mind that each release has breaking changes on entire code bases, yeah, fuck it, just jump alltogether and ignore Obj C and the decades of stable code it has)

"Coffeescript has been replaced by the newer features of Java" <--- ok fam, you lost me here, give me your "ITPro" card please and then kick yourself repeatedly in the groin since I won't be bothered touching you, i might get some stOOpid on me.

Fuck, these articles are all over the place, from idiots like the one above, to the moron raving about pharo smalltalk shitting on every tech you use.

Just.....please bring back shit like byte magazine and shit.....please? or Linux Format, make Linux Format more popular across the board, where people who know their shit think twice before spewing their bullshit to the masses? Some fucking kid there might want to know where to start and these fucking idiots are out there just ruining shit for everything.

This god damned fucking group Project in University!
How did 2 of these stupid as shit ballsacks of useless crap even manage to get through the first 4 semesters?
And now they can't contribute to anything. Or even worse is when they do contribut and mess up everything. Its like trying to play chess with a god damn bird.
Now this fucking project is robbing me of my sleep and the fucking idiots that organize the whole damn thing don't even care about that it's basically just me and one other guy carrying the fucking project.
Stupid theoretic computer science people that get to use as as slaves for their resarch because we "need to get some experience".
If I get anymore fucking experience of how a big software production works I'm going to fucking murder someone...
Verdammtes Arschgeigengesöcks.
Diese schwanzlutschenden Pferdgefickten Eiterwichsende Hurrensöhne.

I fucking shit Blood because I'm in too much stress. And I mean that literally. My fucking asshole burst open because I fucking have to deal with you dirty disgusting scumbags.

So I got an e-mail from a recruiter (a.k.a. recruiter spam) today looking for a candidate with four "essential skills" and my head almost exploded when I read what they were. I have regained my composure just enough to be able to write this rant, but I'm still not myself. I recommend sitting down for this. Are you ready?

The four "essential skills" were:
Java, Jenkins, Eclipse, IntelliJ

I don't know where to begin. Motherfucker, where do you get off telling me which IDE to use? Oh wait, you didn't, you expected me to be an "expert" with two completely different ones, you numb nuts. Why the fuck would I be? I swear to fuck these idiots would probably screen out the best programmer in the world because s/he uses VI/emacs/Atom/Sublime/fucking-Notepad.

I can hear them saying "oh, you don't know IntelliJ? Sorry, we need an expert in that."

Fuck off you filthy cunt! No, sorry, I take that back, I shouldn't be mean to the mentally disabled.

Also, Jenkins? Really? Any developer can pick up how to use Jenkins to its full effect in a matter of hours, or a couple of days at most.

Why do companies hire these jackasses to do a job as important as recruitment? Why do they write job specs that are so incredibly stupid? I almost replied to express interest so I could go to the interview and throw a bucket of red paint on them (because they're making me bleed inside).

Where's the Tylenol?

Watch out for these fucking bug bounty idiots.

Some time back I got an email from one shortly after making a website live. Didn't find anything major and just ran a simple tool that can suggest security improvements simply loading the landing page for the site.

Might be useful for some people but not so much for me.

It's the same kind of security tool you can search for, run it and it mostly just checks things like HTTP headers. A harmless surface test. Was nice, polite and didn't demand anything but linked to their profile where you can give them some rep on a system that gamifies security bug hunting.

It's rendering services without being asked like when someone washes your windscreen while stopped at traffic but no demands and no real harm done. Spammed.

I had another one recently though that was a total disgrace.

"I'm a web security Analyst. My Job is to do penetration testing in websites to make them secure."
"While testing your site I found some critical vulnerabilities (bugs) in your site which need to be mitigated."
"If you have a bug bounty program, kindly let me know where I should report those issues."
"Waiting for response."

It immediately stands out that this person is asking for pay before disclosing vulnerabilities but this ends up being stupid on so many other levels.

The second thing that stands out is that he says he's doing a penetration test. This is illegal in most major countries. Even attempting to penetrate a system without consent is illegal.

In many cases if it's trivial or safe no harm no foul but in this case I take a look at what he's sending and he's really trying to hack the site. Sending all kinds of junk data and sending things to try to inject that if they did get through could cause damage or provide sensitive data such as trying SQL injects to get user data.

It doesn't matter the intent it's breaking criminal law and when there's the potential for damages that's serious.

It cannot be understated how unprofessional this is. Irrespective of intent, being a self proclaimed "whitehat" or "ethical hacker" if they test this on a site and some of the commands they sent my way had worked then that would have been a data breach.

These weren't commands to see if something was possible, they were commands to extract data. If some random person from Pakistan extracts sensitive data then that's a breach that has to be reported and disclosed to users with the potential for fines and other consequences.

The sad thing is looking at the logs he's doing it all manually. Copying and pasting extremely specific snippets into all the input boxes of hacked with nothing to do with the stack in use. He can't get that many hits that way.

TLDR - you shouldn't expect common sense from idiots who have access to databases.

I joined a startup recently. I know startups are not known for their stable architecture, but this was next level stuff.
There is one prod mongodb server.
The db has 300 collections.
200 of those 300 collections are backups/test collections.
25 collections are used to store LOGS!! They decided to store millions of logs in a nosql db because setting up a mysql server requires effort, why do that when you've already set up mongodb. Lol 😂
Each field is indexed separately in the log.
1 collection is of 2 tb and has more than 1 billion records.
Out of the 1 billion records, 1 million records are required, the rest are obsolete. Each field has an index. Apparently the asshole DBA never knew there's something called capped collection or partial indexes.

Trying to get approval to clean up the db since 3 months, but fucking bureaucracy. Extremely high server costs plus every week the db goes down since some idiot runs a query on this mammoth collection. There's one single set of credentials for everything. Everyone from applications to interns use the same creds.
And the asshole DBA left, making me in charge of handling this shit now. I am trying to fix this but am stuck to get approval from business management. Devs like these make me feel sad that they have zero respect for their work and inability to listen to people trying to improve the system.

Going to leave this place really soon. No point in working somewhere where you are expected to show up for 8 hours, irrespective of whether you even switch on your laptop.
Wish me luck folks.

Overheating The Javascript Ecosystem

Paranoid thought: You know, in the course of every day, being the corrupt piece of shit that I am, whenever I see a scandal or what looks like shenanigans-in-the-making, I ask myself

"Wisecrack, is this a fucking scam or con of some sort?"

I was recently asking myself this about javascript.

Not the language per se, but the ecosystem.

I noticed how there are a thousand CLIs for simple shit. Another four thousand for page long libraries, for simpleton level shit (because prototypes are designed after satans own aborted love-child of object models). I noticed another eight thousand guys imitating steve jobs, talking at conferences and 'change the world' high-on-huffing-my-own-shit TEDX talks like rubyists that don't realize the world has moved on, all to hawk books and inflate CVs for cushy positions at major tech firms and the herd of dicksuckers following the next fad off a cliff like lemmings. And another eight thousand 'tech journalists' pushing them off the cliff while begging for outrage and hype dollars and slowly circling like vultures above the drain that is the ad-based economy.

And I thought to myself.

"Wisecrack, who benefits from all this noisy self-indulgent horseshit? Where is all the money coming from for all these books, conferences, meetings, publications, media, bread, and circuses?"

"I don't know wisecrack. But if I were the CEO of a big company, threatened by the prospect of a universal language, or universal platform, like flash, but one I couldn't kill like flash, I would try to do the most corrupt thing I could think of."

"Whats that wisecrack?"

"I would try to 'overheat' the ecosystem by selectively hiring people from that ecosystem, pumping money into a boatload of similar products, all in the hopes of provoking the equivalent of an immune overreaction, imitators all flooding the ecosystem with the same shit in different packages, self promoting sycophants, aggrenadizing social media idiots, tools sold as tools, hyped as 'the next coming of steve jobs', overcooked shit that focuses on ceremony over functionality, ritual over productivity, documentation over innovation like some sort of amazonion infinite nesting doll hellscape of documents linking to documents linking to documents, each one a new circle of dantes inferno, where the definition of anything links to another document that says "see also xyz", and I would convince them that they had done it to themselves."

And then I would push typescript as their lord, savior, and master. "

"How do you know all this wisecrack?"

"Because I am a piece of shit, and, this is what I would do in any executive's shoes."

Can I just say that the absolute most important skill for any kind of programmer or engineer is knowing HOW TO FUCKING GOOGLE!!!

<Background>
I am the head of programing on my school's Robotics Team. We're relatively know, however most all of my teammates know how to program and they are all very talented academically. In fact my "Lieutenant" will be the valedictorian.
</Background>

Seriously I missed one meeting yesterday because of the flu. Imagine me lying in bed and suddenly getting multiple calls from the team (even the valedictorian) asking how to fix errors from Android Studio. I asked them if they googled them and they said "No we didn't".

Why is knowing how to google not apart of any kind of CS education! They could have been after an hour, but NOOO it took them after 5 hours!!

Oh my FUCKING GOD!!

I am so fucking sick of hardware design and integration projects.

First thought, let's outsource. Except the best quote we got was $2.8M for a fucking 10 by 10 board with 200 components. What the dick shit is this did I send the email as Bill fucking Gates or something so they all thought I'm shitting gold bars?

Micro X comes with awesome frameworks and SDKs but you can't use it because it doesn't have those extra 2 pins you need.

Micro Y has them but they're not 5V tolerant so you can't use the $8 chinkese relay board, you have to add your own onboard relays which will cost you $25 and a blowjob for some FUCKING RELAYS

Then there's micro F to the rescue! enough pins, 5V tolerant, awesome SDK give or take a few months guessing how the fuck to use that 40Mb of C code library & fixing someone's fucking code, but wait, you can't use it because it has no external interrupts so basically you have to keep polling inputs and can't go to sleep, so you need to run the core at full speed and guess what the fuck it is more power hungry than the hottest trophy wife at 200mA.

No problem, fuck this shit, let's go STM like I told you so in the beginning - but I should be the one to pick the micro and all power components. Here's the specs, call me when it's done, we'll fuck with some of the web apis in the meanwhile. 2 weeks later: fuck all of you, I can't find what you need!

Then smartass #173 comes with the brilliant idea to try them chinkese PLCs with integrated HMIs, wtf they're cheaper than what you idiots are building?!. Sure, let's go for it. Spend $3000 on test units, wait 8 weeks because EU customs and taxes, then finally - NONE are usable despite the suppliers who swear it works, it has transistors on outputs, i'll be fucked it even lets you stick your cock in and gives you a tickle.

Then dickweed C-motherfucking-TO goes like, sure, let's go bare metal again, wtf we are old hardcore fucks with big cocks, plug a $8 pic24 and it will do the job. Except you have to spend 18935718 fucking years writing everything in C and when you're almost done guess what the fuck happened, we still need another micro so we can have ethernet and connect to a MQTT server.

No problem, trash all the work, let's pull the big guns, pic32mx-what-the-fuck, spend 1 month getting the toolchain to work and 2 more months writing all sorts of fucking signs and dashes and commas and brackets in MOTHERFUCKING C again and when we all think omfg we're done, some moron decides to test the board at high humidity and low temp and guess what the fuck happens - it breaks because that shit isn't rated what we need, but the fucktard was on paternity leave 5 eons ago when we started because his fucking wife gave birth and he couldn't spend a couple hours testing a blinky in his own fucking house in the fridge or wherever the fuck, so he just said yes and now guess what - we're all fucked.

Then let's try this shit board, it has the USB support and we can put one of them cheap ass ethernet chips, we'll just connect it to android via OTG and let the fucking google connect to the API over 3G. Except motherfucking android and its usb stack add some 100ms of latency which is basically more than I need to cook 3 fucking meals or some idiot needs to die electrocuted because the estop button doesn't shut down the relays fast enough.

2 years later I still don't have a workable prototype. Fuck my life. Fuck whoever planned this shit, they must have been brain fucked, in fact fuck this shit altogether. Fuck computers and processors and servers and micros and every fucking atom of copper in this fucking house.

Did you fucking idiots think that I was gonna tell you to implement async await on the requests and not notice that you IMPLWMENTED GODDAMN SYSTEM-SLEEP YOU DESNE MOTHERFUCKEDS IT NOT TAKES 10X AS LONG AS MY OATCH TO JUST LIMIT THE NUMBER IF HTTP REQUESTS FOR FUCJS SAKE THIS CODE LOONS LIKE A RACCOON FUCKED AN MACBOOK THAT ALSO GOT FUCKED BY A GOAT FROM CHERNOBYL THAT SOMEHOW MUTATED TO A RACCOON GOAT 🐐 MACBOOK 💻 HYBRID ABOMINATION THAT IS NOW CLAWING MY EYES OUT AND GIVING ME RABIESCANCERAIDS

So, there was some project going around universities for online lab and connecting students to learn together. My school saw it as opportunity and I was appointed to make a simple web app doing just that.

T - teacher

First there was the database.
T1: "I think that you can design the tables better"
Me: "This is the most logical way, but sure, I can modify it. Although, T2 told me to do it this way."
T1: "Just do what I said"

And I did.

T2: "Why did you change the design, I gave you the schema, didn't I?"

Oh I was so fucking pissed. I'm skipping classes so I can work on this fucking piece of shit and this is what I get. Two self fucking centered idiots.

I resolved situation somehow, then came the frontend. I was told that the T3 will do it I just have to connect it to my backend, great.

So this so called "Teacher of Web design and development" downloaded fucking bloated bootstrap template with scripts longer than my future. It took 2 minutes to just load the html page from local drive.

I told T2 that I will make design it from scratch and I will try to make it look the same. I finished it somehow. Loaded in seconds, worked superb. First thing T1 told me: "Just roll back the design"
He didn't even listen to what I had to say.

Ohh boii, I fucking lost two months on your piece of shit garbage app, and what I have from it? Fucking bag of dicks. The thing is that I have another year with those pricks.
If this is what the industry is like, you guys deserve a medal.

A friend of mine got an account hacked on Crunchyroll. Whenever he tried to login, the website told him that no account with his email existed. As I had two accounts, I tried something real quick. I logged in to the account I'm not using and tried to change the email address to a 10 minute mail. I logged into my own email account patiently waiting for a confirmation email. After 10 minutes I still hadn't received it. So I checked the 10 minute mail, and there it was. I can't describe how furious I got with Crunchyroll at that point. Are you for real? It's that easy? Fucking idiots. I hope the guy responsible for that system dies in a fire with a thousand rubber penises up his ass!

People telling me to talk more even when I have nothing valuable to say. On my first job, two people in our batch didn't get promoted. Guess what we have in common? We're both quiet. He's a good developer though, better than most of the people who got promoted. I'm not so sure about me. My senior back then told me that there's no place for quiet workers there. He didn't say it to be rude to me, more like "yeah, management is fucked up here".

This happened way too many times, in all the companies I worked with. I even received feedback from clueless motherfuckers that I should improve my "communication skills". It was clear to me that those idiots use words that they don't really understand. To them, good communication skill means talking non-stop even when you don't make any fucking sense and use words you don't really understand, but there were a few people who supported me. I speak clearly especially at work. I can articulate my thoughts better than these obnoxious motherfuckers.

But people don't care about that, especially in this country. I managed to find ways to make my efforts more visible. I don't mind attracting only the few who sees honesty instead of incompetence when I say I have nothing to say about a certain subject. They know I speak up when something's up.

When people don't listen to training and just realize today that they can upload files to our internal system.

Its been this way since 2003 you mother fucking idiots.

People are fucking idiots.

You should be able to rate people on LinkedIn, or leave reviews.

The number of absolute fucking idiots I’ve worked with over the years who are on there and whose bios read great, is shocking.

It’s like... wait this guy’s page reads like he’s a total hero.... but in actuality he’s s completely useless fuck-nugget.

The Hungarian public transport company launched an online shop (created by T-Systems), which was clearly rushed. Within the first days people found out that you could modify the headers and buy tickets for whatever price you set, and you could login as anyone else without knowing their password. And they sent out password reminders in plain text in non-encrypted emails. People reported these to the company which claims to have fixed the problems.

Instead of being ashamed of themselves now they're suing those who pointed out the flaws. Fucking dicks, if anyone they should be sued for treating confidential user data (such as national ID numbers) like idiots.

some people are fucking idiots.

i remember one time - i made a website which ended up having a slightly major security flaw.

the big isnt the point though. this guy told me to just "write secure code."

i consequently told him, "how about you go fuck yourself?"

well, he was a painter, so i then told him "maybe you should fucking draw better," and promptly left.

well, here i present what that would be like if other people were told shit like that.

depressed person - "just be happy"

teacher - "just make your students smarter"

homosexual - "just like the opposite sex"

presidential candidate - "just win the election"

homeless person - "just get a house"

idiot - "just stop being my client" (sorry had to vent)

well you get the idea.

devs should be treated as functioning members of society.

Fuck this shit, fuck it, take it down, smash it with a rock and fuck it. Fucking 18th century system where we are graded for a 2 hour work after 6 months of learning. Fuck the idiots who think reading from a piece of paper will teach us something. Fuck the sheep who follow without looking aside. Fuck the asshole who initiated it all, and fuck this shit. Thank you.

The Cloud Of Bullshit

Every day I wake, and I think of my one true mission in life. To mock and ridicule paint huffing idiots. Something recently that drew my ire, like the hemorrhoids on my ass is this idea of 'the cloud', THE CLOUD and the buzzword lingo-bingo bullshit that providers use to hype and sell it.

For example, airtable is an amazing service. I love that I can insert just about anything into a row, create any of my own row datatypes, that it's flexible as all hell.

I love it.

And I hate that I'm essentially locked in to the cloud.
I fucking hate how if my internet goes down (thanks you pie eating inbred dipshits at comcast) I have no access.
If the company is bought, they'll shut down like all the rest , to be "relaunched at a later time" (or never).
I hate that if the company doesn't make enough money, or it's investors change their mind, woopsie, service is shut down.
I hate that the cloud is synonymous with massive data leaks and IOT-levels of stupidity in security practices.

Every time someone says "but its in the cloud! Isn't it amazing!"

I always think 1. YEAH IF IM AN INVESTOR I GET TO MILK LOW BROW FINGER PAINTING FUCKWITS EVERY MONTH like Adobe sucking the blood from infants who are still in college.

2. Why? So I can get locked into their platform, have them segment off previously free features (fucking youtube and the 'subscribe so you can continue playing audio with your screen off' bullshit), and then have fees increase month over month?

3. Why, so every four years during the presidential selection, if I piss off some fuckstick braindead lemming literally sucking his girlfriends BFs cock, they can potentially shut me out from my own data completely?

The Cloud is built on shit-colored hype sold to knob gobbling idiots, controlling idiots, profiting at the expense of idiots, and later fucking them for buyout payola. The Cloud is a Cloud of Bullshit shat out by huckster messiahs straight into the lapping mouths of fanatics worshiping slavishly like toilet drinking scum at the porcelain alter of a neon god, invisible, untouchable, and like a spigot, easily shut off without anyone noticing. And when it happens, I'll be there, shouting "WHERE IS YOUR CLOUD NOW?"

Native any day. 100% native or I don't fucking want it
None of this node.js-gone-native bullshit either with notetaking apps taking up hundreds of megabytes of ram, where everything is bootstrap or react, in a browser, in a window container, because people are so fucking incompetent we have to hold their hand WHILE they give themselves a reach around.

Native or nothing.

For my favorite notetaking app, I use Microsoft OneNote. "OH god, a heathen, quick, stick his body up on a stake!"

But hear me out. I'll be the first one in a crowd to kick bill gates in the nuts (not because I particularly hate microsoft, just because I think hes kind of a cunt).

So when I say onenote is good, I really fucking mean it. Sure they did some cunty things like 'dumbed down' the interface, and cut out some options. But you know what they can't do?
Shut down the damn service (short of a system update completely removing the whole app, which, frankly, wouldn't surprise me).

It's so god damn good it waxed my balls, cured my cancer, fixed my relationship with my father, found my long lost brother, and replaced ALL my irl notebooks.

It's so good that if it was cocaine I'd be hospitalized for overusing it.

So god damn good it didn't just replace all my notebooks, it even replaced and sped up my mockup process three to five times. Want layers?

Built in. Just drag an image on to the notebook to import instantly.

Want to rearrange layers? Right click select "send forward/back/bring to front/send to back".

Everything snaps to grid by default and is easily resizeable.

I had all the elements for a UI sliced and diced. Wanted to try a bunch of layouts. Was gonna take me two damn days.

Did it in three hours with the notebook features of onenote.

After I started using onenote, me and my bodypillow finally conceived even.

Sweet marries mammaries I just fucking jizzed. Thank you onenote.

P.s. It really did speed up my UI design, allows annotated images, highlighted text. Shit, it can even do kanban.

And all I can think is "good job microsoft making an awesome product for free, being dumb as fuck for not charging for it, and then not marketing it at ALL."

It was sheer fucking luck that I discovered it while was I was looking for vendor STD bloatware to blast off my new install.

OneNote: Worth a try even for the kick-gates-in-the-nuts fan club.

The cloud can suck my balls.

Just watching some videos about feminism and I'm just thinking: "how fucking nutty are these people really?!"

Too drunk right now to write about the recent developments in Mozilla's adoption of "the big bad patriarchy and meritocracy" (and I don't have the password database mirrored on my recently unfucked WanBLowS 10 desktop yet so I've no idea how to authenticate to devRant on it yet) but I'll try to get it out there by tomorrow 🙂

Simply put, Mozilla.. I like you regardless of the whole Mr. Robot crap from earlier, and I'm sure you've got your heart in the right place.. although I'm using Brave nowadays - a creation from the board member you've shunned over this whole PC shit, Brandon Eich. But let me tell you this, Mozilla. Enough is enough. Don't be fucking idiots.

So, I'm investigating this flipping problem at work involving mbeans. Other than the fact that it's a fun fucking word to say, idk a damn thing about it, and the people who are having problems with them/it are looking at me like I'm a fucking pregnant triceratops... HOW THE HELL am I supposed to fix your shit if you aren't going to tell me why you need mbeans, what you do to cause the error, and what you do to make it go away. YOU'RE GIVING ME LESS THAN NOTHING... on a temperature scale, we're in negative Kelvin...

Also, anyone know what in the world an mbean in? Because right now, these overpaid idiots are making me think it's not a thing and just another way of saying "coffee"

Fml... you keep getting the weekly discussions right on point.

I started with the last guys right out of university... just out of Hospital.

With a brand new degree and a Crohn’s diagnosis I stepped into the first place I found hiring. They were good guys, after a junior dev... to get stuck in their muck.

I did! I nailed project after project, tricky development after tricky development. I spent 5 years with them and over those years things changed.

They had a mass cull... the original idea was to get rid of the useless middle managers, the ones managing other managers being managed by another manager for no real reason.... the ones that do fuck all with their day.

But the fucking idiots upstairs put the job of working out the cull in the shitty middle managers hands.

So, instead, they cut the titles senior, junior and everything in between. Everyone was just a thing, no senior things, no junior things. Just things.

Once they’d done that they said “we’ll we have this many things, they’re all the same, let’s get rid of the things with the highest pay checks because the other things can do it just as well for less money”...

And that’s how they cut 50% of their senior techs.

I was one of the ones left behind but the damage became obvious quick. The middle managers barked out orders at people who couldn’t complete them, and everything went to shit.

My team was rebranded twice in as many years... an obvious ploy for funding, but the cost of the team fluctuated like hell because contractors had to fill the senior positions at 3 times the cost.

Then the managers started barking out Self contradictory orders. Do this, but this way...

This would work, but not that way... try explaining that to a group of non-technical, useless as fuck middle managers. It took months, and shit flows downstream so we got the bulk of the hassle for it.

Then my boy Morpheus, got a warning... they threatened his contract for saying “this will work, but not that way”.

He kept the contract, and the manager giving him the warning said he didn’t think he should... but he, and all the middle fuckwits don’t have the balls to stand up against nonsense.

That was the breaking point for me, I handed in my notice and told them a month was what they could have.

I didn’t have a position or an idea of where to go, a few long-standing offers as back up in a pinch but not the perfect job.

On the Thursday I decided I was done, I let my manager know. Then I boshed the fuck out of my CV and updated my profiles.

My phone started ringing off the hook, a senior NG2/MEAN/Ionic dev on the market is like candy to recruiters. They’re lovely too.

I went to a few interviews that were okay but not great. Then a company got in touch... one that I immediately recognised as an IT book publisher. They said they were looking for NG/NG2 devs, senior. winner! Set up the interview.

So I’d spent the weekend with the missus, about an hour away from mine and 2 from the interview. I hadn’t planned on staying there but at 6ish she looked over at me and said “do you have to go” <- imagine that with puppy dog eyes from a gorgeous Slovenian lass.

I folded quicker than a shitty pancake toss.

We spent the night together but that meant I had to be up at 6, to go back to mine, iron my interview clothes and make it to the train to manage the interview. Fuck. I did it, but I was at the interview wired on caffeine and struggling to be awake and coherent. I still managed, that’s what I do, I make do and try to do well regardless of the situation.

That comes from being ill btw, when you’re dealt a shitty hand you learn to play it well.

They were good guys, the heads all knew what they were on about, not the middle management bs I was used to.

They demoed me live with an ng1 test, which was awesome as hell to play with.

We chatted, friendly and cool guys! I loved the place.

The end of the week they got me in for second round. Ng2 and competence test, again I went for it!

Positive feedback and a “we’ll get back to you ASAP, should be by Tuesday”...

Tuesday was the Tuesday before the Friday I was due to leave the old company... I was cutting it close.

On the Monday the offers started rolling in, a few C# ASP MVC positions, cool but I was holding out for the guys I’d interviewed with.

Then Tuesday comes around, I’m nervous as fuck but it’s okay because I knew regardless I can pay the rent in December with one of the offers.

Then said yes!

The thing that seemed most important in the process was my ability to talk to any fucker. If you’re coming up to interview, talk to everyone, the grocer, your barista, the binmen, anyone. Practice that skill above all others.

I start tomorrow morning! I can’t wait.

Final thought: middle managers are taints.

Signed up for a driving class...
This is what i get in the mail shortly after.

Fucking fantastic guys! Saving passwords plaintext. Is it because of the government?

I just realized that devrant is the *only* community I can resort to lol. I can't rant to any of my coworkers about work. can't rant to any of my colleagues in college because they are fucking idiots. I tried to help them improve time and time again but they just blatantly refuse and I just gave up and said fuck you guys. can't rant to my family or friends cause they can't understand shit about code.don't know if any other platform that has a community that's as amazing as this one. so I would've been practically alone if it wasn't for devrant. thank you guys for enduring my bullshit over the past year. and thank you for the developers for creating this awesome community. I don't really know what I'm talking about but I guess I had to rant a little. if you've read this far. Thank you.

guess this turned into a rant of it's own. lol. will write the actual rant in another post. XD

Fuck this raspberry piece of shit. You can’t really use it for any serious job. Its just a tinkering gizmo designed to waste your time.

I’ve tried using them for several things over the years. First was as a NAS, it was either freezing, losing the wifi/ethernet connection or causing data loss. That’s right, when all it had to do was to take the fucking file someone copies over the network and write it on an external drive.

Can’t use it to view movies either - sooner or later it becomes slow to the point where its unwatchable. Even with a 1gig video, so no HD or anything like that.

Then i tried setting it up to control the ventilation in a house. It would work for a couple days or so then hang. What the fuck, am i sposed to have another raspi to reset the first one? Then what, the 3rd for the 2nd? A centipede of raspberries? And ofc controlling the relays was always hit and miss, sometimes you had to spam the button like 20 times to be sure it flips a pin high or low.

Then i tried to set it up to control a bunch of mining rigs. Once again random fails, except this time a couple video cards died to heat. No worries, RMA, what else we can do?

Then, random small scripts to read various sensors and post a json. Put a radiator and fan on it, battery, what the fuck not. But no. Random freezing, random disconnects.

Naturally all this shit spiced up with countless hours spent on debugging: is it me? Did i trip on the wire? Was it the vibration? Or perhaps the temperature or humidity? Was pluto taking a piss because its no longer a planet? What are the logs saying? Maybe it will work if we recompile? Or maybe use another language? And what the fuck not!

Who and why the fuck came up with this shit? Is it all just another conspiracy to waste my time? Dear satan you don’t need boards and kernels and java and linux and the fuckton of idiots to waste my time, just get me a couple lesbians and some booze and you’ll never hear from me until i end up in your fucking cauldron.

*/Fucking angry rant about ACER comming/*

SOooooo dear ACER. You fucking stupid idiots who cant write a proper BIOS even.
You sell a gaming laptop that has Ryzen 5 2500U and limit the clocks to 1.6Ghz without AC power ?
OK for battery life but damn give me the option to disable it.
Ohhhh yeah you deny you have advanced menu in BIOS that is locked away from users. For some fucking reason.
Oh yeah they also say its for battery life which is idiotic reason because they dont limit Intel CPUs at all and they can run at max clocks even on battery.

Sooooo dear ACER. Dont expect me buying next laptop from you because i will better buy it from some other OEM like Dell that does a proper job on BIOS and they at least wrote a proper IOMMU groups and not like you fucking idiots so that we have to debug the kernel and make workarounds in linux because of your laziness. I don want to see the source code of windows drivers because im sure that its bug on bug on bug and wrote totally terrible.

ACER YOU ARE TOTAL IDIOTS. (Except few people there who actually know something and are willing to fix it but they cant because Boss doesnt allow it)

Just saw on Zuckerbook.
Moral : Put a screaming message for such idiots on support sites to fucking read the error. It's all written there.

Attention Software Engineers!

Quit shooting yourselves in the fucking foot! And this ESPECIALLY goes to new grads. I get that you have just finished school. I get that you need a job! But don't fucking settle for a $30-$40k salary because you're "entry level"! The only reason why there are employers who offer that type of salary is because they know that there are enough idiots who will settle for it!

On average, an entry level software engineer's salary is between $50-$60k at the very least! For Senior developers, it is at least $80K/year (although an argument can be made for why they shouldn't settle for less than $100k/year).

Each time a moron low balls his/her salary, that brings down the market value for that talent. And keep this in mind! They don't have a choice but to hire you. They could choose to outsource their work to poorer countries but they don't want to do that due to obvious quality-related reasons so they HAVE TO hire you if they need the work done. And since the ball is in YOUR COURT, demand your fair salary. You went to school for 4 fucking years. You dealt with that stress for 4 fucking years. Why settle for a salary that you could've made without going to school?

Lels

Before I was unceremoniously laid off by a shit company in which they tried to blame shit on me I was working on a opencv implementation of a proprietary document scanner.

I finished the Android prototype and was working on the ios implementation. It was left unfinished in the ios version because I was building it in swift and obj c to compare code bases.

They launched a shit unfinished Android app of their product without the scanner (they could not add the scanner lels) and have not been able to do shit on the ios version.

I did not give them the Android prototype. There was no binding contract that specified that what I developed was theirs. There is no record of anything.

The scanner? Is still in my phone and I still have the built project in my mac.
Unless them cheap assholes decide to pay another engineer for the opencv implementation, their vbscript php non theory knowing shit lead will have to figure out the required mat obj c swift java cpp code needed to build it.

Top kek

!rant
For the second time in a row, one of our customers decided not to pay their server. The server, on which a lot of the work we did for them (online shop) was hosted. Shortly after completion, we specifically told them to backup their stuff on a daily basis, secure their server and regularly update it... Guess who did neither of those things, in addition to not paying their server after more than 5 reminders, and still complains about their shop being offline. Fucking idiots.

My last boss, one of a kind:

Despite being an officer and me just a lowly enlisted, always closed the door and asked for my honest and unfiltered opinion on why whatever we're doing is a stupid fucking idea. Understood that when I call everyone idiots, it's not out of spite or disrespect. It's because they have no clue what they are doing and making nonsensical requests, and I just want to get us back on track.

A good boss doesn't say things like "I'm in charge so this is how we do it" or "I'm an officer so you can't criticize me because that's disrespect!" But instead listens to the ideas and thoughts of those that nobody else takes seriously.

Alright lads here is the thing, have not been posting anything other than replies to things cuz I have been busy being miserable at school and dealing with work stuff.

Our manager left us back in February. Because she was leaving I decided that I wanted to try a different path and went on to become a programmer analyst for my institution, if anything I knew that it was going to be pretty boring work, but it came with nice monetary compensation and a foot in the door for other data science related jobs in the future. Thing is, the department head asked me to stay in the web technologies department because we had a lack of people there and hiring is hard as shit, we do not do remote jobs since our work usually requires a level of discretion and security. Thus I have been working in the web tech department since she left albeit with a different title since I aced the interview for the analyst position and the team there were more than happy to have me. I have done very few things for them, some reports here and there and mostly working directly with the DBA in some projects. One migration project would have costed my institution a total of 58k and we managed to save the cost by building the migration software ourselves.....honestly it was a fucking cake walk, if you had any doubts about the shaddyness of enterprise level applications regarding selling overpriced shit with different levels of complexity, keep them, enterprise is shaddy af indeed. But I digress.

I wrote the specification for the manager position along the previous manager, we had decided that the next candidate needed to be strong with development knowledge as well as other things as to properly understand and manage a software team, we made the academic requirement(fuck you, yes we did ask for academic requirements) to be either in the Computer Science/software engineering area or at least on the Business Administration side. We were willing to consider BA holders in exchange for having knowledge of the development process of different products and a complete understanding of what developers go through. NOT ONE SINGLE motherfucker was able to satisfy this, some of them were idiots that I knew from before that had ABSOLUTELY no business even considering applying to the position, the courage it took for some of these assholes to apply would have hurt their mothers, their God if they had one, and their country, they were just that fucking bad in their jobs as well as being overall shit people.

Then we had 1 candidate actually fall through the cracks enough to get an interview. My dude here was lying out of his ass through the interview process. According to him he had "lots of Laravel experience and experience managing Laravel projects" and mentioned repeatedly how it would be a technology that we should consider for our products. I was to interview him alongside the vice president of our institution due to the head of my department and the rest of the managers for I.T being on vacation leave all at the same bloody time.

Backstory before the interview:
Whilst I was going over the interview questions with the vice president literally offered me the job instead. I replied with honesty, reflecting how I did not originally wanted him but feeling that our institution was ready to settle on any candidate due to the lack of potentials. He was happy to do it since apparently both him and the HOD were expecting me to step up sooner or later. I was floored.

Regardless, out of kindness he wanted to go through the interview.
So, going back to the interview. As soon as the person in question referenced the framework I started to ask him about it, just simple questions, the first was "what are your thoughts on the Eloquent ORM? I am not too fond of it and want to know what you as a full time laravel dev think of it"
his reply: "I am sorry I am not too familiar with it, I don't know what that is" <--- I appreciated his honesty in this but thought it funny that someone would say that he was a Laravel developer whilst not knowing what an ORM was since you can't really get away from using it on the initial stages of learning about Laravel, maybe if one wanted to go through the hurdle of switching to something like doctrine...but even then, it was....odd.

So I met with the hod when he came back, he was stoked at the prospect of having me become the manager and I happily accepted the position. It will be hell, but I don't even need to hit the ground running since I have been the face of the department since ages. My team were ecstatic about it since we are all close friends and they have been following my directions without complaints(but the ocational eat a dick puto) for some time, we work well together and we are happy to finally have someone to stop the constant barrage that comes from people taking advantage of a missing manager.

Its gonna get good, its gonna get fun, and i am getting to see how shit goes.

Story Time!

Tittle: About Larry.

Fun Game: Tell me if / when in this story you know the plot twist.

Setting: Years ago, non coding job.

I work with Larry a lot, Larry works remote. In technical terms Larry is senior to me and I escalate some technical issues that get assigned to Larry. I've never met Larry in person.

Larry can be hard to work with, but he's plenty good at his job and I don't mind his prickly side. Sometimes it takes telling Larry something a few times before it sinks it, but that's not a big deal. Sometimes it seems like Larry doesn't remember his cases entirely, but he has a lot of cases. Also Larry has good reason for how he works considering the land of scubs who usually escalate to him without any thought / effort.

Larry's escalation team is short staffed and they're trying to hire folks, but that's been like that forever.

So one day I get an email that Larry is going to be out of the office for a few weeks. Nothing unusual there.

My current case that I share with Larry sort of floats in limbo for a while. The customer is kinda slow to respond anyhow and there's nothing that I need Larry for.

Finally I get automated notice that my case has had a new escalation engineer. Laura. Laura is much more positive and happy compared to Larry. Understandably Laura isn't up to date on the case so we go back and forth with some emails and notes in the case.

The case is moving along just fine, we're making progress, but it's slow because of the customer's testing procedures. Then we hit a point where this customer's management pushes on sales for a solution (this customer's management is known for doing this rando like for no reason).

Down the management chain it goes and everyone wants a big conference call to get everyone up to date / discuss next steps (no big deal).

Now I really don't want to do this with Laura and throw her into the deep end with this customer, she doesn't have the background and I'd rather do this call with Larry & Me & Laura. Also according to the original email Larry is due back soon.

I start writing an email to Laura about "Let's try to schedule this for when Larry gets back."

Then I stop ... I don't really know why I stop but when it is a "political case" I want some buy in on next steps from management so I go talk to my manager.

-Plot Twist Incoming-

Long story short, my manager says:

"Laura IS Larry..."

O

M

G

I had no idea. Nobody told me, nobody told ANYBODY, (except a couple managers).

Back up a few months Larry apparently went to his managers and told them he was going to transition, surgery and all, in a few months.

Managers wondering how to address this went to HR and some new hire very young to be a manager HR manager drone logiced out in her bonkers head that "Well it shouldn't matter so don't tell anyone."

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!!??

Thank god I didn't send that email...

I did send an email to Laura explaining that I had no idea and hoped I didn't say anything stupid. She was very nice about it and said it was all good.

After that incident made the management rounds (management was already fuming about being told not to tell anyone) things came to another critical point.

Laura was going to visit the company HQ. Laura had been there before, as Larry, everyone knew her as Larry... nobody (outside some managers) knew Laura was Larry either. With nobody knowing shit Laura was going to walk in and meet everyone ...

One manager at HQ finally rebelled and held a meeting to tell his people. He didn't want Laura walking in and someone confused, thinking it was a joke or something horrible happening.

HR found out and went ballistic. They were on a rampage about this other manager, they wanted to interview me about how I found out. I told HR to schedule their meeting through my manager (I knew they didn't want my manager to know they were sniffing around).

Finally the VP in our department called up the HR head and asked WTF was going on / kind of idiots they had over there (word has it legal and the CEO were on the call too).

HR had a change in leadership and then a couple weeks later there were department wide meetings on how to handle such situations and etc.

Looks like despite 20-30 years on the market all popular text / spreadsheet editors are still loading whole file to memory.

What the fucking wankers. WTF are they doing whole day besides changing menu layout and icon colors ?

Clearly development today is lead by bunch of idiots from marketing department accompanied with HR hiring social network self made models.
What a fucked up world.
Let’s add AI to our software but fails to open 150MB csv file.

Great job everyone. Great job.

!rant

I just saw someone write about how much he hates school and it reminded me of all I am about to say:

I go to a fancy private school in my country full of shitheads and idiots that think that they can rely on their parents money for the rest of their lives, are always concerned about the latest trends (yeezys, dabs, fidget spinners... etc) and it just gets on my nerves as I have to live with all that and have almost no friends since I failed my class two years ago, when I sit in school I can't focus on anything the teacher says which in turn contributes to my shit grades and there is nothing I can do about it. I have been diagnosed with persistent depresseive disorderand bouts of major depression and my mom won't accept to give me adequate medication because she says(although this is not always the case) that antidepressants can trigger the bipolar disorder that runs in my family, and on top of all this shit, ever since I was 7 I have been raised by my single mother after my father died (I never tell people that my father is dead usually because I hate the look of pity I get coming out of their faces) and my mother has been screwed over for all her life because she can't make a good decision or call bullshit even if you put a gun to her head.

And what I hate most about all that is that I have no one to talk to because my mom is one of those religious freaks so I can't talk to her about my real deep thoughts, and every psychologist or counselor I have been to has been shit.

And this is just another chronicle of my miserable fucking existence.

!dev

Just sold my car waaayyy under it’s worth just because I don’t have much time left to relocate.

And those fuck faces want me to pay half of THEIR transport costs..

The both of us just signed a fucking contract you morons.
Read the contracts you write before giving them to anyone.

Good for me that I did.

Fucking unfriendly assholes trying to rip people off twice in a row..

They make immigrants look bad just because those guys are fucking idiots..

They didn’t get another penny from me those cock suckers..

And now, a good evening too all of you.

Just8littlebyte out! *mic drop*

Apple fanboys justify the removal of audio jack as simplification of design. How the fuck am i supposed to find those damn pods if i misplace them. and what uf your bluetooth pods are shit and i want a different one. Fucking idiots.

Except my class being full of fucking idiots (see another rant...) I wouldn't change nothing.
Pretty happy right now!

OK explaining how to flash fucking kernel and ROM to idiots that unlocked bootloader just because of fun and now they have bricks because they don't know how to flash kernel back.
Ohhhhhhhh fuuuuuuuuuckkkkkkkk.

PM's? Like private messages? No idea, still haven't figured it out. There's still idiots from technical chats sliding in, often with a question that belongs in the very same chat they came from. My Telegram name has now literally "(No PM!)" in it, and a bio that says in all caps "DON'T FUCKING PM ME", yet there are STILL people that don't get it. September never ended, did it?

... Oh. Project managers.

2017 has ended and I want to throw this fucking rock of anger with it out of the Window.

I will tell you how my last 3 to 4 years as private IT Guy (IT Dumpster) for everything was.

My Gaming Community:
It was so fucking retarded that I would like to punch everyone there in the face over a thousand times.

Seriously there are over 60 People in that Community and they take every shit for granted and only cry about everything.

I'm Paying since 4 Years over 60 € for our Server every month. Some people donated some small bucks over the time and in the end it was around 150 € Donations over 4 years.

Im thankful for the Donations, but these people really think that they can demand for this Donations private Gameservers for over years for free or think that they now own the Servers. WTF?? FUCK YOU!!

Im managing 2 Linux Server with Web, MySQL, Voice and Gameserver. What did 1 guy donate? 10 € for 4 years, thats around 15% for just a month. You would get our Teamspeak for 7 Days for that price idiots!!

I did all the damn Webdev and am now writing a App in Kotlin for Android man!!

Since last everybody in the Community gets on my nerves, because they are so ignorant and dont appreciate the work of others 😡.

My Association where I support the hole IT with a friend:

We decided in the commitee that we would take on major changes in our infrastructure.

We need to finish the barebone concept in the end of January 18.
Early December 17 I wrote my friend, that we need to have a meeting and plan everything.

Well, now I mostly designed the roadmap by myself and didnt receive any reply from my friend 💀.

I really dont understand why the shit always sticks at me and I need to finish it.

I really love to code something, install or repair PC's with joy or manage Server but the people around me are in my free time like poison and they take out my fun for it.

The only fun and enjoyable IT Part for me is at my fulltime job. Thats the only good place left for me as Safe Heaven and the people there really appreciate my knowledge and work I do.

Dear Tailwindcss,

Fuck you.

Fuck you and your messy as fuck html files.

Fuck your shitty pseudo 90s 'Let's dump all our shit in a single html file'.

Fuck your claims of being responsive, most of your widths and heights are done in FUCKING PIXELS.

Fuck your claims of being flexible, adding a 10% width class took 20 minutes of scrolling through your shitty docs.

And the worst part is, the poor devs 4 years from now are gonna be stuck maintaining this goddamn shit because shitty enterprise companies desperately trying to stay relevant are treating this shit like the Holy God of Frontend styling, the solution to CSS once and for all

FUCKING IDIOTS CSS ISN'T BROKEN, THIS GARBAGE IS!!!! WE DON'T NEED A SHITTY SOLUTION TO A PROBLEM THAT DOESN'T EXIST

Tailwind can go fuck itself with it's 200 character html lines

You're all fucking idiots with no thoughts of your own. No one gave a shit when Drupal and Django made the master/slave change 4 years ago because the idea of the "regressive left" wasn't the cultural enemy of the zeitgeist.

Think for your fucking selves instead of being so brain-dead and reactionary to something that doesn't even affect you.

Fucking neo-reactionary bullshit, that's what it is. You people don't care, you just want an excuse to rant at "teh SJWs".

Fuck.

Just showed few projects that i have been working on to students that may come to our school next year. Holy fucking shit are they fucking stupid idiots. They didnt know what programming is and they are supposed to learn to manage a fucking huge network in 1 year. I just hope those people will not do the job because if they do then the world network will be fucked up and everything will be fucking broken.

I ask really simple question
Do we really want to get anybody into programming even tho they dont have the mind to do so and will make a terrible code that will not work. The world will break like that. So is this really what we want to bring every fucking person into programming ?

I hate when people ask you to find their deleted files. Fucking people! It is like asking an architech to recover something from their trash bin. People are idiots that don't want to learn. Some people think that they know a lot of computing and barely can power on they monitors. At this level of average stupidity, people should get licenses to use computers.

Finally got a new job! Outta here!

Just got out of a meeting that I drove half an hour for (that could easily have been a damn phone call), for hand off stuff with the agency my company has hired to replace me.

I've talked to their senior dev a few times in the past, and he always struck me as an arrogant asshole. I assumed this meant that he had some level of competence to justify this attitude, but evidently not. Turns out he and his employees are a bunch of fucking idiots who don't even know how to use the command line, or anything but a cms with stock themes.

I'm taking all of the specific public stuff I've done for my employer off my resume as soon as I get back, because these dudes are going to fuck it up worse than a soup sandwich.

I finally got my new Smartphone after going there personally to the courier

Seriously the couriers were lazy piece of shits and they can't even deliver to my address when it's perfectly valid.

Like couriers from my local PO and from Lazada/Taobao can even get to my house, what the fuck

Funny topic. I normally am very understanding of incompetence when it comes from nothing more than lack of experience. Happens to all who at one point is a junior dev.
As long as people have the willingess to learn I find myself being very understanding.

I take a lot of effort in helping others, I don't mind at all, and I would rather take them extra 10 mins to explain how to do something than to slap people with rtfm and then blame them completely when their lack of experience messes up stuff. I also take care of providing isolated environments and giving explanations. Even when they screw up, it is isolated from the rest and I can teach them what was wrong, most of the time they figure it out themselves. It has made my coworkers respect me more, rather than being a total dick that believes that what I do is sacred and should be spared from newbs (like all the idiots in S.O) i take the approach of a very patient mentor.

But I am a hippie, shit works for me.

But I do not excuse shitty attitudes and arrogance. I find that not knowing is fine, but acting as if one knows all and then fucking shit up makes it bad.
Which is when I change, I am a hippie but can get violent pretty quickly.

I have been screwed over shitty attitudes more than incompetence.

Happened in my country a couple of months ago. And the 'website' was built with wordpress.

Posted a question on Stack Overflow today for the first time in as long time... Have lost faith, what shit some suggestions people have.

- Clear the cache, check again...🤨
- Your code is wrong, I tested it my way, you need to change.😒

Read the fucking post properly and gauge some level of expertise... I clearly wrote that it WAS working, the bull shit your detailing is completely irrelevant.

Fucking idiots...

To all those idiots at xda who always ask for ETA and when x will be fixed.
Fuck you !!!!!!!!!!!
You have access literary to all my fucking sources.
Why dont you fix the fucking RIL if you cant wait.
I would all of them give 1 week to fix some easy bug without internet and let the suffer like that. Then they might realize it isnt easy to fix android hw bugs.
You have brain too.
But i can just use it much much better.

Dear Arch Linux Maintainers. Why the fuck are you sending me my password in plaintext?! Not enough: You are sending me my fucking password every fucking month, so i do not forget it, because its important!??!?!?! WHAT THE FUCK! Fucking idiots...

Okay, one after another. They like to piss me off, apparently.

Coleague knows something isn't possible with current state of some api and pushes phone to me so I can maybe figure out what to reply to client. I dry-typed in "Its not possible" gave him phone and said "boom done, you know it aint possible"

Okay, TL;DR she got pissed that I am pissed that this BS is thrown at me and I dont want to participate in promissing something I know is undeliverable.

So she told me to go to PM/PO *kind of guy but not rly* with that problem. He aint technical by any mean. We are small company and for some reason this guy has more bearoucratic approach than I thought is possible to fit in one human.

Anyway. Well, apparently we will have meeting what are our options.
It all beginned that one guy promissed other guy undeliverable feature....

And becouse someone couldn't use his fucking brain it's pushed onto me, or I need to figure out how to do it. You cant without introducing safety flaw, period, it's that fuckin' simple.

But nooo, we will have god-knows-how-long meeting, that will bring exacly 0 value, as fking allways, and all I want now is just fucking focus on my fucking code becouse, ya know, I have timeline to follow, I dont have time to all that BS.

And to give you context, while keeping the stuff I cant share secret, imagine you have an API, that is just 'facade' of backend API, and layer of security. And they want to add authoritative endpoint to the facade API. Kind of endpoint "yes, you got paid".

Bravo, big brain, it will not work without like huge-as-fuck vunrability...

IDIOTS

How to not get pissed? Any protips?

I just got a fucking job again after 2.5 months between jobs and the new place has been allowing (if not encouraging) the piracy of Windows Server in client environments... I thought this place had so much potential but I was wrong.

Going to start looking for another full time job or really buckledown and try to get my freelance project/business started.

BTW fuck microshaft for expensive licensing, but I’m not risking my certs and professional career for some idiots trying to pirate software.

We use a third party paid company to produce a service and give ongoing support for it, which all our revenue streams depend upon. They are shit and their service is shit. Here's how my conversation about testing went today.

Me: 'hey X wrote an integration test project for the service. It shows the service is broken 50% of the time. We should give their team access to it and have them run it as part of CI'

Colleague: 'They are too shit to setup CI'

PM: 'we are stuck with them so there is no point. It is what it is'

Boss: just ignores me. Not even a reply.

Some days later

Head of QA: 'Hey Dev and QA are broken'

Me: 'because their service is broken. I made so and so suggestion before but it was rejected. We will just have to accept Dev and QA are broken 50% of the time'

Head of QA: 'no we cant'

Me: 'ok so we should setup the tests to run by giving them access'

Head of QA: 'No we shouldn't. The tests can only be used by us and if they break it tells us so we can act on it, or choose not to'

Me: 'We would not want to act immediately on all our revenue streams breaking? Yes we can reverse engineer their client and fix errors as they occur, or we could just have them run the tests and a team our company pays for can stop adding breaking changes to their own API every other day. Right now it has been broken for 2 weeks.'

Head of QA: 'in an ideal world we would have an internal team so you're wrong'

Me: :)

I really don't understand how they can come to such a conclusion. Am I missing something or am I surrounded by total fucking idiots?

Fucking shit for brains authors that think the digital world is a fantasy realm where everything can happen just to aid their story. Out of boredom i watched "scorpion" today, a tv series about a group of geniusses which are a special case task force.
They got a visitor from the government saying the servers from the federal reserve bank were encrypted with ransomware. I already twitched when they said the economic system would collapse if the servers were left inoperational for a few days. Then one guy got to his desk and "hacked" the fed network to check... he then tried to remove the malware but "it changed itself when observed". But they got the magical fingerprint of the device that uploaded it. In the end some non-programmers created the malware, but it is super fast and dangerous because it runs on a quantum computer which makes it hyper fast and dangerous. They got to the quantum computer which was a glowing cube inside another cube with lasers going into it and they had to use mirrors to divert the lasers to slow down that quantum thingy. And be careful with that, otherwise it explodes. In the end the anti-malware battled the malware and won, all in a matter of minutes.

This is a multimillion hollywood production. How can a movie this abusive to computer science even air on television? Shit like this is the reason people still think the cyberworld is some instable thing that can explode any second. It's not, it's an instable thing that can break down any second. I remember "ghost in the wires" and people had surreal imaginations about the internet already. Shit like this is why people stay dumb and think everything can be done in seconds. If i ever should encounter one of these idiots i tell him i have an app that can publish his browser history by taking a picture of his phone and watch his reaction.
Time to shuw down the tv and learn vim again.

These ignorant comments about arch are starting to get on my nerves.

You ranted or asked help about something exclusive to windows and someone pointed out they don't have that problem in arch and now you're annoyed?

Well maybe it's for good.

Next comes a very rough analogy, but imagine if someone posts "hey guys, I did a kg of coke and feeling bad, how do I detox?"

It takes one honest asshole to be like "well what if you didn't do coke?".

Replace the coke with windows.
Windows is a (mostly) closed source operating system owned by a for profit company with a very shady legal and ethical history.

What on earth could possibly go wrong?

Oh you get bsod's?
The system takes hours to update whenever the hell it wants, forces reboot and you can't stop it?
oh you got hacked because it has thousands of vulnerabilities?
wannacry on outdated windows versions paralyzed the uk health system?

oh no one can truly scrutinize it because it's closed source?

yet you wonder why people are assholes when you mention it? This thing is fucking cancer, it's hundreds of steps backwards in terms of human progress.

and one of the causes for its widespread usage are the savage marketing tactics they practiced early on. just google that shit up.

but no, linux users are assholes out to get you.

and how do people react to these honest comments? "let's make a meme out of it. let's deligitimize linux, linux users and devs are a bunch of neckbeards, end of story, watch this video of rms eating skin off his foot on a live conference"

short minded idiots.

I'm not gonna deny the challenges or limitations linux represents for the end user.

It does take time to learn how to use it properly.
Nvidia sometimes works like shit.
Tweaking is almost universally required.
A huge amount of games, or Adobe/Office/X products are not compatible.
The docs can be very obscure sometimes (I for one hate a couple of manpages)

But you get a system that:
* Boots way faster
* Is way more stable
* Is way way way more secure.
* Is accountable, as in, no chance to being forced to get exploited by some evil marketing shit.

In other words, you're fucking free.
You can even create your own version of the system, with total control of it, even profit with it.

I'm not sure the average end user cares about this, but this is a developer forum, so I think in all honesty every developer owes open source OS' (linux, freebsd, etc) major respect for being free and not being corporate horseshit.

Doctors have a hippocratic oath? Well maybe devs should have some form of oath too, some sworn commitment that they will try to improve society.

I do have some sympathy for the people that are forced to use windows, even though they know ideally isn't the ideal moral choice.
As in, their job forces it, or they don't have time or energy to learn an alternative.

At the very least, if you don't know what you're talking about, just stfu and read.

But I don't have one bit of sympathy for the rest.

I didn't even talk about arch itself.
Holy fucking shit, these people that think arch is too complicated.

What in the actual fuck.

I know what the problem is, the arch install instructions aren't copy paste commands.
Or they medium tutorial they found is outdated.

So yeah, the majority of the dev community is either too dumb or has very strong ADD to CAREFULLY and PATIENTLY read through the instructions.

I'll be honest, I wouldn't expect a freshman to follow the arch install guide and not get confused several times.
But this is an intermediate level (not megaexpert like some retards out there imply).

Yet arch is just too much. That's like saying "omg building a small airplane is sooooo complicated". Yeah well it's a fucking aerial vehicle. It's going to be a bit tough. But it's nowhere near as difficult as building a 747.

So because some devs are too dumb and talk shit, they just set the bar too low.

Or "if you try to learn how to build a plane you'll grow an aviator neckbeard". I'll grow a fucking beard if I want too.

I'm so thankful for arch because it has a great compromise between control and ease of install and use.

When I have a fresh install I only get *just* what I fucking need, no extra bullshit, no extra programs I know nothing about or need running on boot time, and that's how I boot way faster that ubuntu (which is way faster than windows already).

Configuring nvidia optimus was a major pain in the ass? Sure was, but I got it work the way I wanted to after some time.

Upgrading is also easy as pie, so really scratching my brain here trying to understand the real difficult of using arch.

When you get into good company but end up in bad team. Worst thing to happen. I want to quit. But as of now I don't have any option.

I am way too triggered. Any one tries messing with me anymore at work, I won't be able to stop myself. I am gonna shout....take out all my anger. To hell with you assholez! I don't care if you get me kicked out of team or job! I can't take it anymore. FUCKING IDIOTS!!!!!!

What in the fuck is the Roger's website built with? It takes way too fucking long to sign in and load my account. And there is a modal that pops up asking me which account I want to view when I sign in. 5 seconds later the styling for it finishes loading and the modal snaps down like 50 pixels, so right when I'm about to click one account, I accidentally click the wrong one. For such a large company, I would have hoped their shit wouldn't have been built by fucking idiots.

So this will be my first rant/story sorry if it gets too long.

So finished work and I was like finally some days off, went to bed, woke up the next morning, went to near city to take care of some work, went back and I noticed they were digging the ground near my place, as I've found out from neighbors they were changing some pipes, well ok no problem arrived home, sat on my PC to study a bit and do a bit gaming, but guess what?? NO INTERNET well ok contacted the ISP, the idiots told me it will take them 2 days to arrive WTF? is this 2018 or 1918?? I was so pissed off but ok the next day they called me that they arrived, they checked and said that they will need to fix some wires they will return the same day.. so I've waited few hours but no internet, the asholes didn't came, so the next day they arrived and guess what?! the idiots that digged the holes cut the wires, instead of fucking contacting the ISP to ask for supervisor to tell them where they can dig they didn't know what was the fire for and they thought oh well lets cut the fucking wire, and instead of stopping and contacting the ISP about their mistake they continued with the digging and cut the wire at 3 places, so the ISP at the end called the police, the plumbers that did the digging where just laughing, why do you laugh you primitive ashole, even 10 year old would first ask if it can continue if it finds something that he didn't know about it (I call primitive the person not the job title), and the best part is that the idiots not only they cut the wire at 3 places they also took part of it out of the ground and then they filled the holes back! Now I won't have internet for 2 fucking weeks, yes in 2018 this is happening, at that moment I was so pissed, but kept my cool and contacted the ISP to give me LTE USB stick to use it for the next 2 weeks, sadly they couldn't do that wtf??? So I asked politely who will pay the damage for me not working for 2 weeks and they said that they will gladly pay the damage.. So I was confused because that literally meant that they will compassed me for the 2 weeks, so I re-asked are they sure about that and they said yes, so lets see what it will be done, in the meantime I solved the internet problem by using my phone to access internet on the PC.. But still its amazing how primitive people can be and how ISP don't have alternative solutions for such cases, just to point out this sam ISP bragged how they will be among the first to bring 5G when it arrives... LOL

I left class early today

I understand me and this kid are both students and both of us are still learning. But when he asks me to help him solve an issue I fucking expect him to listen then try what I’m saying unless he knows for certain that my idea won’t work

I don’t expect him to start ignoring the person HE asked for help to try things on his own and end up DELETING THE FUCKING GRADLE FOLDER because the 1.5.1 version of Android studio my teacher makes us use told him gradle was corrupt

I also didn’t expect him to tell the professor I didn’t tell him not to And them end up with the professor fucking assigning me to help him fix everything even though the kid won’t listen to me anyway refusing to just copy he java and XML to a new project so I grabbed my stuff and left Fuck that bullshit

I understand we’re both students and in the grand scheme of things we’re both idiots. But when I’m asked for help I expect the person to at least listen and not do something absolutely stupid like delete something we don’t understand how to fix

Now I’m making common sense a requirement to ask me for help I don’t need any extra stress I’ll deal with the consequences of walking out tomorrow But I can’t say I regret it

Biggest one is dealing with idiots who break everything. Can’t space anything properly. Oh you needed that function? I got rid of it because it broke my code, and it was easier. Oh yes, just perfect, get rid of a core fucking function you retard that multiple parts of the code rely on. (Luckily it wasn’t pushed to the main, otherwise everything would’ve broken...)

Another one is finishing a damn project, I have like 20 by now... all in different languages that I want to learn. Time comes to work on it? Oh wait, let’s make this because it’s more fun! Just adding more projects to my graveyard.

I hate having to deal with our IT service desk. Every time it takes enormous energy to get to the right people and make them understand that no, you are not an idiot, but you actually have a technical issue.

Sure thing they do have a few competent nice folks there too I've gotten to know over time and they indeed have to deal with a ton of dumb non-tech savvy idiots on a daily basis. However, if my job title mentions "software" and "engineer" they should at least assume I'm an idiot in tech. Or something. Every single time I need to open a ticket, even for the simplest "add x to env y", I need to quadruple check that the subject line is moron-friendly because otherwise they would take every chance to respond "nah we can't do that", "that's not us", or "sry that's not allowed". And then I would need to respond, "yes you do:) your slightly more competent colleague just did this for us 2 weeks ago".

Now you might imagine this is on even another level when the problem is complex.

One of our internal apps has been failing because one of the internal APIs managed by a service desk team responds a 500 status code randomly but only when called with a specific internal account managed by another service desk team.
(when I say "managed by", that doesn't mean they maintain it, it just mean they are the only ones who would have access to change something)

Yesterday I spent over a fucking hour writing a super precise essay detailing the issue, proving a million times it's not on our end and that they need to fix it. Now here is an insight to what beautiful "IT service" our service desk provides:

1) ticket gets assigned to a "Connectivity Engineer" lady

2) few hours later she responds and asks me to give her the app and environment IDs and grant her access to those
(naturally everything in my email was ignored including these two IDs)

3) since the app needs to be in prod for the issue, I make a copy isolating the failing part and grant her access to the original "for reference" and the copy to play with

4) few hours later I get an email from the env that some guy called P made changes to the actual app, no changes to the copy
(maybe they immediately fixed the app even though I asked them to only touch the copy)
I also check the env and the live app had been shared with another 2 people giving them editing rights:)

5) another few hours pass and the lady responds that she had been chatting with P (no mention of who tf that guy is) and that P has a suggestion that might work and I should test it, "please see screen shot" for details:

These motherfuckers sent me a fucking screenshot of the env config file where "P has edited a few parameters" that might help. The screenshot had a 16 line part of the config json with a bunch of IDs and Base64 params which HE EDITED LOCALLY.

Again, because I needed a few iterations to realise what I've just witnessed:
These idiots modified some things in the main app (not the copy) for hours. Then came to the conclusion that the config needs some IDs and params updated. They downloaded the config json. Edited it locally. Did not fucking upload it back to the main or test app. Did not test it live. Did not CC in or direct the guy with changes to me. Did not send me the modified config file. Did not even paste the new IDs into the email. But TOOK A FUCKING SCREENSHOT OF THE MODIFIED FILE AND SENT THAT SHIT TO ME. And then had the audacity to ask me to test it when they had access to it and that's literally their fucking job.

I had to compare the fucking screenshot to the live config file and manually type in the changes.

And no, it still doesn't work. And Now I have to get back to them showing it still fails the same way but I just can't deal with these people. Fuck. Was hoping by the time I write it all down it'd be better, and it does feel a bit better, but I still need to get this app fixed. And I can only do it through these... monkeys. I just can't. Talking to these people drains my life energy... I'm just sad.

I dunno if you gents remember the Nickelodeon show known as Drake and Josh.

It was pretty big in Mexico and the U.S.

Well, one of the characters from that show is the singer/actor Drake Bell.

For a while, Drake Bell would **constantly** tweet about how much Justin Bieber sucks.

I aint denying that Justin Bieber sucks, i don't like his music at all.

But the constant attacks came out as jealousy, at least to me.

What does this has to do with development or even computers? Well this is EXACTLY how I feel about Louis Rossman CONSTANTLY making videos about apple products.
We get it man we really do, sadly for a lot of us the only way to get ios development done is through a fucking Mac

EVEN if his whiny ass is right about the hardware not being top notch and all that shit I AM still not able to explain a 2013(early...as in january) macbook pro still working with literally NO fucking problems. Before that the other macbook was just changed because we wanted the 2013 model. The thing worked, the one before did so too and the 2017 model that I have works, amazingly so i will add.

Still, the army of dell,hp and lenovo laptops that I've had before just died or are not functioning properly. Either it is my shit luck or Apple's "shitty hardware" got something really fucking right.

I think its retarded really. If you don't like them then fine, you don't have to, personally I fucking love all computers and os, but I don't get fanboys hating for the sake of hate.

the fuck you care if I spend 2500 on a computer? I would the same shit for your mom and the computer would last me longer.

Does owning multiple macs make me better than you? No

Does this mean that you are piss poor and can't afford shit and that is why you are hating? No

Will I call you <insert number of insults> gor your choice of pc or os? No

What is retarded is this: you all are DEVELOPERS(at least a good chunk) and your ass better fucking know that some people USE a certain tool because IT IS THE RIGHT ONE FOR THE JOB.

It is a damn fine operating system, a really good computing experience. It ain't your taste? Fine, das cool, but for fucks sake it does not mean that the other people are idiots or whatever.

Grow the fuck up and get yourself an opinion.

I am surrounded by incompetent fucking idiots, from the team lead that does a half arsed job at coding and then wonders why nothing further down the chain works to whole component teams that seem to be lagging so far behind they don't even know what the current code base looks like.

And who's in the middle of it all running around fixing all the problems these fucktards create, why yes it's me.

I would leave to let it implode and see what they'd do but I already know, they'd leave it till I got back so I could fix it all for them.

Feel like going around with a rolled up news paper and whacking each of them on the back of the head while screaming "no, bad code monkey, bad, fix your own bugs"

I hate being the go to fix it guy sometimes.

FUCKING MOZILLA!
>Quantum
>over9999 times faster
-Ughm, okay, but what is the trick?..
-THE TRICK IS THAT NONE OF YOUR FAVORITE ADDONS WILL WORK!!!

Seriously this is fucking insane! Several of my addons which were essential for me to stay sane is gone and I don't even know how to live without them. And all this bullshit is happening because these idiots in Mozilla decided to enforce use of WebExtensions. For ones who unaware, WebExtensions is much, much poorer framework and many cool addons simply unable to work under WebExtensions because of its limitations.

Are you the one who loved the speed and joy of using mouse gestures? GUESS WHAT ­— IT'S GONE.
Maybe you made your browsing activity super efficient with use of the “Tab Groups” addon that used to allow you to group your browser sessions? SAY BYE-BYE TO IT!
And many more!

Most importantly, I cannot understand why would a company enforce use of a framework that will decrease functionality of a product.
Anyway, it seems like Firefox is not a browser for addon enthusiasts like me anymore; got to find a new one, any recommendations?

I’m shocked, some of the hideously embarrassing questions these dim mother fucking senators have been asking Zuckerberg. Is this for real?

Started this day great with the mention that a coworkers contract isn’t suspended.

In August?

Thats in freaking 6 months. Workload is already fucking insane, and STILL you fucking decide to fucking fire another fucking person from YOUR fucking company.
This has been the 5th i think and my contract is due to July. If it is prolonged i’m thinking of screwing this company over my going away myself. Bunch of mother fucking idiots.

Ended the day great as well.
Heard that a new person is going for lead promotion. Haha.
He has been here for only two months. :,)

Left and right projects are exploding meanwhile i’m in the middle trying to cut the right wire!

The marketing department must be run by wild butthurt fucking monkeys... Bloody idiots do you even know the word " controll"?! It's a simple fucking thing instead of wasting fucking 2,5hrs of my time which could been put on.. oh I donno more productive work?!?

(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻

Fuck sake.. 2 numbers... 2 numbers on almost every fucking article was wrong and you couldn't even check these in the fucking program BEFORE asking me to fix the images for these and upload? No I had to upload everything only to later noticed that you cunts gave the wrong numbers .... Butthurt wienerschnitzel 🖕

Dealing with stupid questions.

I have a pretty quick temper and low tolerance level for bullshit, to put it lightly. When there is one thing I could never deal with, then it's fucking idiots asking fucking idiot questions because they're fucking idiots.

I did some investigation on Jira board. There was a story in Oct to design solution for a problem and a senior engineer has commented saying it was done.

The same story opened again in December and another senior engineer has commented saying "canonical and solution is designed"

But FUCKING IDIOTS didn't do anything! Last sprint I got the development story for same and I have been fucking waiting for them to give me solution. But idiots are way too lazy to do any work!

Right now what i want to do is just quit everything, move somewhere else, get a job and never fucking look back. Im sick of all these projects college dumps on me, the idiots im surronded with, my job, people who think im interested in their fucking research. I just want a 8 to 5 job and after 5 im fucking done and nobody calls me about how long will the next release take for projects i dont give a shit about.

In other news i just started my thesis yay.

You know when people here complain about idiots in stackoverflow downvoting without providing explanation?

Yet the same is being done here.

I made a post here about a recent porn game, and such game is relevant because it's top 3 in earnings in patreon.

if you don't think top 3 patreon making 50k a month is interesting for a post, then you're a prejudiced moron.

What rule am I breaking? I didn't post any pornographic image. I didn't even share a link to the game.

Do people here have a fucking problem with sex?

Is sex, the very cause of our existenxe in first place, so problematic that we need to downvote it?

When you're an idiot who doesn't know what you're talking about since you've always used Google, and people give you shit for it anyways instead of just being cool about it.
😧🔫

Come on guys. This is ridiculous. My school uses Google services, so I'm pretty much forced into it. I've never really ventured outside of Google because it works just fine. I clearly don't know what I'm talking about. That much is obvious. How about trying to be a good person and help me out instead of talking down to me and --'ing my rants and comments.

This is why humanity is doomed to fail. Half the population is comprised of complete fucking idiots, and the other half is mostly assholes.

Dear Colleagues. Stop saying iOS (i-oohs). It's (i-oh-es). You don't call it fucking windows ooohs. You sound like fucking idiots to our clients

I’ve been an angry old man this week. Frustration is a bitch, especially when you can’t really pinpoint the source of it with any resemblance of certainty.

Maybe it’s that having been constantly stressing over the impending graduation and the effort required to get there with too little time and energy to actually achieve it is boiling over.

Maybe it’s the reality of having absolutely zero me time since last March playing fucking ping pong with my head.

Maybe it’s me having trouble getting back to terms with a certain codebase after being assigned to other projects for the last almost 1,5 years and now trying to finish something the ex-lead started before he left.

And most certainly it’s the constant stream of brainless verbal vomit that raises the misanthropy levels through the roof.

Fucking juniors, fucking seniors, fucking Swedes, fucking C-level arseholes, fucking green dots, fucking idiots, fucking ”woke” ass social media influencers, fucking posers - Fuck You All!

Annoying Indian professors are everywhere. It's a computer vision class are you really teaching us Regression?

What about transfer learning? object detection! Give us papers to read, let's do projects.. what the hell is this I am going take attendance bullshit and teaching crappy concepts.

I did not sign up for this shit! I came here for my Masters to get away from pompous mother fuckers like you ...

My class is also filled with those idiots,who think bias in a neural network is somehow related to class imbalance ? Now the same idiot proceeds to ask questions like...

Why would the weights change in a neural network?
Motherfucker why you in this class ? Why don't you stick to your shit and ask these questions later..

I am so pissed off right now guys ...
I was sitting in my lab understanding the deeper insights of BN, activation fucntions.. various optimizers ..etc Stuff that this idiot motherfucking teacher must be covering... UGGH.

I shouldn't cuss so much.. or at least add variety to my cuss words..

I am pissed off cuz instead of learning the shit I should be learning I am forced to come and attend this class and waste 2 hrs of my life ...

It's the summer i find it hard to focus anyway (want to go out hiking or swimming or something.) BUT. the moment I find some resolve to focus

I get this fucking bullshit.. !

My mind is so fucked right now... I can't think of anything but standing up in class and screaming " Mother fucker, mother fucker...(point to the idiots in class you) motherfuckers shut the fuck up..

Can someone suggest some colorful swear words ?

My brains not working -_-

It is just about now that I start feeling like "Anger" from inside out

Following my first rant, my boss had the brilliant idea of running the old and the new architecture in parallel. I had advised that it won’t be ideal since the same Scala code was ingesting into 2 different Kinesis streams and one was running an old KCL written in Java where as other was consumed by a Firehose delivery stream(eventually we will be ingesting it into Firehose directly). I had told few manual + automated tests on Code as well as from a functionality of the new architecture and a set of tests for checking the integration of the new Producer code with Consumer.

The statement I got from my boss was “This is the test, we test it on production in parallel”. My boss had a brilliant idea to fucking test the new code on the production directly but running them in parallel without accounting for undefined behaviour it might cause in the current production system. I mean my boss should get a Nobel peace prize for shattering our mental peace.

Anywho, we started the deployment today at 5AM in the morning. I had all the aws services deployed. Was just waiting to deploy the new Collector code which we did at 5AM. Immediately after 5 minutes the system went bonkers, there was fire, blood, demons and I was smoking a cigarette with the biggest “I told you so smile” on my face. I’ve just written an email to my boss and have told him calmly that “Listen motherfucker, 90 percent of the software companies aren’t idiots to focus on testing and quality. We need to start spending time on testing and quality else we’ll again be in the same soup after few weeks again”.waiting for his reply

I hate it when software downloads an update
and then shuffles a notification up my face saying "An update has been downloaded and ready to install".
Just WTF is wrong with these developers! What if I say no then you just successfully wasted my fucking internet data and disk space. Thank you and no thank you idiots.

Today i saw someone complaining that you have to edit a config file on ubuntu to change the behaviour of the laptop when you close the lid, which in my opinion is simple enough.

But what triggered me was another argument saying that how it would be if cars will require a mechanics degree to drive them.

Well maybe then there won't be so many fucking idiots on the road blocking the traffic in almost every fucking city bigger than a peanut plantation.

I swear, people believe they deserve to use the best things without a single clue about how they work.

I have a project idea:
Web app that will automatically generate random like-a-facebook project ideas that will handle the buisness side and automatically post that offer on multiple forums, linkedin and send email with it. All using AI, Nural Networks, Big Data and VR.

Seriously, once fucking more some african or indian guy messages me to work for his awesome "its like a facebook but different" idea where he needs "just backend, frontend and mobile apps" and that he will just "handle the rest" and that "have no money now but after I sign a NDA he will give me some shares", I am gonna find him and shit on his head. Monday did not even ended yet and I already read 9 "offers" like this on my mail and facebook, only one guy white, rest indians or africans.

Why are then people suprised that we consider black and indian devs as a fucking joke 90% of the time. I have a indian dev friend and he could not find a dev job for 2 months, because everyone would rather work with less skilled asian / white guy than indian / black guy. This is not about racism, but about those retards that are acting like idiots. Hope I did not offend anyone (unless you do shit like this, then, please just smash your keyboard over your head).

Words like AI and neural networks are used just to lure the investors to our gofundme campain and steal their money after 2 years of silence.

I am SOOO fucking sick of being asked if our website and gaming servers are going to be GDPR compliant. All these game owners in a panic changing everything they do just to conform to this law.

Fuck GDPR. In all reality COME AT ME BITCH. The EU wants to grow a pair of balls and act like the world internet police? Bring it the FUCK on. You can't even stop pirating in your own country, so how the FUCK are you going to regulate and enforce this law on HUNDREDS of THOUSANDS of servers, when your punk ass government can't even shutdown a single torrenting website.

Give me a fucking break, and shame on you pussies for allowing it. All you people running around scared acting like your private gaming servers are important. I give a shit less how much work you put into your server. I have put more work than most anyone else, but you don't see me trying to act self important as if my gaming server is some fortune 500 company.

Your server isn't important and neither are you. The government doesn't give a shit about your server so can we all just stop acting like this fucking matters. NO ONE FUCKING CARES ABOUT YOUR SERVER.

NO ONE is going to come and sue you for not complying. GDPR is for business, and anyone that wants to argue no look it says right here it applies to all is a fucking MORON. Do you idiots stop and think or do you just believe everything typed out on paper.

THEY CANT ENFORCE THIS ON EVERYONE. They don't have the resources. So use your fucking heads and stop being so fucking scared of a law that has no resources to stop you. THEY CAN"T DO ANYTHING. EU and whoever made their polices, I DARE them to try and touch my server, I WANT them to start something with me, just so I can show the rest of the world why the Internet is still the wild west and why they have no power over me.

You think pirate bay is the only one who knows how to hide their server? You think pirate bay is the only one who keeps backups of their server to be able to re release in an instant somewhere else in the world? Bitch get real this is the internet, a place where a 5 year old can buy hand grenades from the Red Silk Road, and you wanna talk to me about your privacy? Go fuck yourself.

It's not my problem some douche bag went onto a site that used his personal information in the wrong manner. So how about you do what everyone else does and browse ANONYMOUSLY. But no it would be to easy for governments to make their own citizens responsible. Instead they have to hold all of YOUR hands, because you people are to stupid to protect yourself.

Wake the fuck up world, and stop being a bunch of whining little brats who cry for the government to bubble wrap your world so you can live safer. Natural selection is long overdue for a lot of morons still breathing air.

I will NEVER work in customer support. When my friend said that, I thought ,,it can't be that bad". Now I understand him. Well, once you experience how it is talking with that idiots... Two fucking senceless hours. Words cannot explain how much i hate it.

Fucking job recruiters or whoever the fuck.

If the first line on my resume is under "Objective" and it states, "To obtain a job, internship, or Co-op in the field of Networking, Cybersecurity, or Administration." You can clearly see the world sales and customer service are not in there.
If you take 5 seconds to read that or search for the words customer service or sales YOU WON'T FUCKING FIND ANYTHING​.
SO WHY THE FLYING FUCK DO YOU CUMBUCKET FILLED PIECES OF SHIT KEEP OFFERING SALES AND CUSTOMER JOBS TO ME.
I even got a senior sales position before. :|
Yet I can't even get a call back from an internship that's related to what I want to do lol. Smh.

Company Infrastructure Team: We are doing away with proprietary libraries and using standard Java instead.

Also Company Infrastructure Team: Here have a fuck ton of new proprietary libraries with dozens of nested dependencies. Oh we don’t use Maven by the way because we are fucking idiots.

When I say I'm a developer, it means that, in simpleton language, that I don't do your backups, I don't "repair" you PC because you're a baffon and I certainly do not edit company's logo which is in .png format deliver it in .cdr file and expect it as, as good and perfect as original, So fuck you, you impatient , imbecile , pompous prick I've ever met

> "Yeah take as much time as you want, but do it quickly"

I mean what the fuck does that even mean, if you want it done quickly then say so, be a man and face it and don't hide behind the excuse of "take as much time as you want"

Fucking idiots, little do they know when I'm in the zone I need time to think before act so I don't get blamed for "un-satisfied" product in the future.

So I've decided to leave loopholes in the current project I've been working on, deliver it, and leave the company and make their lives living hell, I know this is beneath anyone's standards but I have to do this to teach them how to treat a person properly,FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK,

This is going to be fun

Today Phoronix posted a short article about a (in my opinion cool) new feature I implemented in my file manager (Dolphin). Most of the feedback was positive/constructive criticism but some people attacked me personally because they don't like the feature/think "true" Linux users wouldn't use it.
I gave you something cool for free. Would you please stop bitching about it?
If you don't like it don't use it. You can even disable it if it threatens your ego as a Linux master user

Who the fuck thought java development is okay on a VDI ! Eclipse runs shit even on local environment and running it on a vm located in a different country with 3gb of vram?

You want to do a file search? Wait for 5mins

You want to. Build via gradle. Wait for 15 min

Fucking idiots.

Why the fuck does it happen every god damn time???!!!?!??!! Oh look the 5(0) year old designer created an Armageddon (layout) and went on holiday but that's okay cause it has been already approved by our sweet project manager WITHOUT SHOWING IT TO THE DEV TEAM FIRST. Fucking this fucking fuck fuck! FUCK. You deal with this idiots, i fucking QUIT bitch bye.

In the new job as "Consultant", one of my duties is to maintain the website. Now, the website is based on PHP 5.6 (which they are still using mail method) and without git or sg-git and of course, it is based on cPanel.

Now, I update the website in real time i.e. working on cPanel itself. This is because I don't do for the front end, I do it for SEO. So one day, they reported a "feature" as a bug and assigned it to solve me, I took my time solved it, they did not like it, I reverted it back and I had to listen to a lecture because I did not test it.

Imagine old "wise" ass hats giving a lecture which they do not know about in the first place, 12 of them precisely, yeah that's what happened to me.

If there's something I fucking hate with all my goddamned soul is when you post something online and people get in their fucking high horse and judge you or tell you what to do

Like I understand if you're talking shit about people in the same community, then if someone tells you you're an idiot, I get it.

But if you're ranting about someone off site, then why judge this person? What's the damage being caused to you or the site?

For example, let's say I rant about my wife and the things that annoy me about her, and I use some colorful language to get it off my chest.

There's always one motherfucker, one stupid piece of shit that says something out of line.

In general it's one of these things:

* "wow, you need to calm down, you clearly treat her like shit, she is better than you*

YOU IGNORANT PIECE OF DOGSHIT. DO YOU HAVE CAMERAS IN MY HOUSE AS TO ASSUME THAT I TALK TO HER IN THE SAME MANNER AS I DID IN THIS POST?

YOU GULLIBLE SHIT EATER.

OF FUCKING COURSE I DON'T TALK TO HER LIKE THIS. I'M NOT AN ASSHOLE OR A MONSTER. I AM JUST R-A-N-T-I-N-G.

AND I RANT IN THIS MANNER SO AS TO GET IT OFF MY CHEST AND NOT FIGHT WITH HER. AND IT TENDS TO WORK. DOES IT REALLY NEED TO BE EXPLAINED?

Jaysus fucking christ. These people actually have the imagination of a fish, they can't fucking connect the dots.

Judging someone online is an egotistical thing. People like to judge others because of that morality high. It's the snack of the morally lazy.

Repeat with me: "I am flawed too, I have problems too. I should never judge others easily, let alone without full fucking context".

* "op, you should do <terrible advice>"

these ones are better, because they are trying to help, but still annoying as fuck.

they come in two forms:
old smug and condescending washed up idiots who overrate their life lessons and think they are applicable to every person A PRIORI.

yeah, fuck case by case analysis, these dinosaurs think they're the wise elders of the village.

Age does not immediately mean your advices are valid, your advices are valid on the sole merit of being valid by themselves.

I don't give 2 fucks if you're 60 or 120. If your advices are bullshit, please spare me the idiocy and the lack of case analysis.

I had old people tell me "trust me kid, happy wife, happy life" wtf is that shit? MY WIFE IS NOT YOUR WIFE.

YOU DON'T KNOW MY WIFE. MY WIFE IS ACTUALLY COOL, BUT SHE COULD BE AN ACTUAL PSYCHO AND I COULD BE OMITTING THAT FROM MY POST.

THEREFORE, HAPPY WIFE HAPPY LIFE IS A TERRIBLE THING TO SAY.

JUST STFU.

This reminds of that disgusting reddit post where a father asked advice on /r/relationships about her wife, and people told him "dude, duh, divorce her".

Guess what, she ends up murdering both of her children.

You would think such post would serve a lesson as to be careful giving advice online. But no, people think they're fucking dr phil or something with EXTREMELY LITTLE case knowledge.

People need to talk a bit less and listen a whole lot more.

You want to know how to help a person who is expressing problems?
You want to know how to be REALLY conpassionate?

Just listen. You can give minimal advice, but listening is the most important, with some occasional "i feel you man".

Everytime a journalist asks a suicide disuader what do they do, they always say the same " i just listen to their problems".

ITS NOT FUCKING ROCKET SCIENCE FOLKS. YOU WANT TO KNOW HOW TO BE A GOOD PERSON? CLOSE THE MOUTH AND TAKE THE WAX OUTTA YA EARS.

There's also the younger ones who think they can help when they don't even have no experience at all.

This is being naive, but I Iike that more than the smugness of old people.

Recruiter rant.
Me as a fresher.
Submit your resume?
I thought you went through it before you called me down.
Yes, but I will need a copy.
Don't you have it in your inbox.
(And I was rejected.)

Opened up my laptop to install faster wifi card with macOS support and it turns out that I have m.2 type connection ready for ssd.

These fucking idiots in Toshiba have never said anywhere in this laptop’s specs that it supports m.2.

I bought 128gb ssd and installed it.
Fast af boie and no problems booting from it.

I'm getting more and more fed up with my fellow colleagues who encounter errors in the execution of their code and come to me like bumbling idiots..." I don't know ow what's wrong ... It's not working"

DID YOU READ THE FUCKING ERROR MESSAGE? I GUARAN-DAMN-TEE IT TELLS YOU EXACTLY WHAT'S WRONG! YOU KNOW WHAT...EVEN IF ITS NOT 100% CLEAR GOOGLE IT. BET YOU FIND THE ANSWER

To add insult to idiocracy...I recently over heard grumblings of being displeased at current level - fuck off you lazy ass child - if you can't read an error and Google for the damned solution in today's era search engines and developer assistance, you don't deserve to call yourself a "Senior Developer"

People like to act like there's some great secret to becoming a competent developer...I'm posit over half is simple reading comprehension

Never had the need to feel imposter syndrome, due to i know people that are way dumber than me, could make it.

To give an example on some of the stupid shit i have seen from stupider devs than me. Yesterday at the company i am an apprentice at, me and an senior were debugging some shitty legacy code, from a comapny known to write shit code.

Here is some example of the idiocy from the company that used to maintain the projects we maintain now.

1: LoginActivity: Would first of all sending a soap request out to check if the device ID is whitelisted, then it would sending another one out to verify it, and then if it doesnt exists it would sending another request to that would make create the request (on the admin panel, were the devices can be whitelisted / denied).
Like wtf 3 fucking calls in a row and its fucking on the UI thread, stupid motherfuckers.

2: login soap request, lack the fucking authorization logic, like WTF you could even login without typing anything in the input fields. (Well it does have another system at least to only allow verified/whitelisted devices)

If those stupid motherfuckers that i heard were some fancy pantsy developers with university degress and years of experiences, can make it. Then every fucking one can make it.

The idiocy me and my colleagues have seen the last few months from that company (at least they did go bankrupt some years ago). Is beyond words.

So to anyone with imposter syndrome, if they could make it, everyone can fucking make it. Remember those idiots are likely multiple dimensions below you and could make it.

So many idiots ask nonsensical questions on SO they could answer on their own if they bothered to read the fucking docs.
As if that wasn't enough, they redact their questions in a way that makes it nearly impossible to decipher what they want.

Just another day, like any other. i suppose.
stupid people with dual standards utilizing a system which willfully pisses people off in earnest and encourages 'snarky' responses and moderators who are idiots :P

'this has a negative effect on silly people'

well how about me ? I think they should have to justify the reason they downvote so that things can be addressed. and if they don't make sense you can challenge.

fucking stackoverflow.

For chrissakes, the Stackasses on Stack Overflow have, in their typical fashion, downvoted my question instead of attempting to answer it.

I seriously need help with coding a PyQt5 wizard I made in Qt Designer. I’m so sick of fucking around with these idiots.

Can someone point me somewhere PRODUCTIVE where I might get some help? Looking at Experts Exchange and wondering if they have the necessary expertise. Getting to the point where I’m actually thinking of shelling out money. But I’d much rather just find a good online community or something.

TIA

> Can you help me make this excel document more readable when it's printed? *looking to change the text size and column widths*

Who do you think I am, Mr fucking clippy? Why are you printing it anyway? Step into the millennium and email it to them you fucking nugget, save the planet.

This was after three people already approached my desk in a line, five minutes after I got in. All asking stupid questions, which not only do they have a service desk for but could quite easily Google.

WTF, Rust. You are so fucking hard to write, and TBH, your docs are not understandable. Please writte your docs to be understandable, and make it fun to read, like golang does.

WTF, Rust. I am now looking, for 5 hours straight, for a solution for reading stdin into a variable. Nothing. 6 fucking solutions for 6 different rust versions of which not one works. Nothing is readable. Explain the philosophy of you language! What the hell is this?! Is your language based on the C family? On which is it based?! fucking idiots

Sooooo I came in to work yesterday and the first thing I see is that our client can't log on to the cms I set up for her a month ago. I go log in with my admin credentials and check the audit logs.

It says the last person to access it was me, the date and time exactly when we first deployed it to production.

One month ago.

I fired a calm email to our project managers (who've yet to even read the client complaint!) to check with ops if the cms production database had been touched by the ops team responsible for the sql servers. Because it was definitely not a code issue, and the audit logs never lie.

Later in the day, the audit log updated itself with additional entries - apparently someone in ops had the foresight to back up the database - but it was still missing a good couple weeks of content, meaning the backup db was not recent.

Fucking idiots.

Fuck karens
They are so fucking annoying.
They are idiotic motherfucking idiots
They don't fucking deserve to fucking exist
Fuck 'em

There is no fucking holy grail of programming. It's better to use the right tools for each task instead of wasting hours to make the wrong tool do a horrible job. But noooooo. Even since this co-worker got here, he bragged how good Drupal 7 is for everything, and he never even ised it once before! Now we have 2 fucking projects beyond schedule and a new one coming ing, each of which tries to use a fucking CMS as if it was a fucking framework. Fucking idiots who believe setting a couple of options via gui to generate random code means programming. Fucking bosses who believe using 3rd party community modules and hacking around them to have them do different stuff is better than coding what we need. I fucking gave up and started using raw php to be able to finish this fucking project, but my damn co-worker refuses to. He keeps swearing and punching the desk, saying it's our clients' fault for asking stupid features, and if you dare to mention how it may because we're using a cms like it was a framework, he just goes full bigot about Drupal. Bloody Hell, it would have taken lass than 3 weeks in Rails. I could just headbutt a kitten right now.

Whoever named memcached: fuck you with an open umbrella. It was a bright fucking idea when there already exists a memcahe extension for php. Finding good php examples is impossible when all these idiots name theyr example posts memcached and use memcache class in the code. Fuck.

!dev
to;dr: fuck American mainstream media and all the lies.

I'm am so fucking fed up with American mainstream media. they constantly spew fucking blatant lies or disingenuous, misleading bullshit, and basically cover up anything that "doesn't fit the narrative".

it's like they think we're all idiots.

In South Africa, privately owned farmland is being confiscated from whites, as far as I can tell, because they're white. it's basically not being talked about in mainstream media because they're white. if it were any other race, I'm sure it would be all over the media.

"Violence again women in videogames must stop". uhhh, most videogames I've played, the violence is against about 99.9% male/0.1% females.... so....

"Donald Trump is a fascist". now I'm not saying one way or another whether I support Donald Trump or not, no opinions here just facts: Donald Trump is, at the very least, right-leaning, and fascism is a FAR LEFT IDEOLOGY. saying Donald Trump is a fascist is completely baseless and just a completely retarded claim.

literally calling for socialism.... do I even need to comment? have you ever read a history book?

countless other examples can easily be found if you look at any independent moderate to slightly right-leaning news source, podcast, etc.

I've had enough of the fucking blatant dishonesty of the mainstream media, whether it's flat out lies, or being disingenuous, or misleading, or not covering huge stories because they don't meet the narrative.

i fucking hate idiots that save all of the most important business files in a pst archive even though they have told not to several times!!!

Self-proclaimed 'best' hosting business solutions "GoDaddy", if had 2 brain cells, they would never suggest me to reset the account for my custom theme not working on WordPress. Fuck you cunts

Woo time for a Chromebook rant against Samsung!

So they just 'revised' the Chromebook plus (Currently using v1 to write this) and I was intrigued because they ditched the Samsung made ARM chips for an intel CPU.... Buuuuuuuuuut... It's a fucking celeron... Of all fucking things to put in a half thousand dollar laptop, at least an m3 would be useful. Then I find out they are ditching the full metal body, it's heavier, thicker, same 3GB of RAM, ditching the 3:2 aspect ratio (Fucking why?!) and the 'upgraded' keyboard doesn't even have back lighting...

Ugh, makes me want a pixel book more, double the price and a million times the performance and quality -.-

!dev

I fucking hate with all the strength in my body this meme format:

nobody:
someone: wacky unpredictible quote

fuck that bitch ass, lazy, unfunny, uncreative format. It fucking sucks dick. It's not funny!

Jesus fucking christ, it was funny the first month.
But month after month after month, this fucking thing won't die. It's way way below the average meme format, and that's saying a lot considering what the average is.

I check youtube comments and for every funny and thoughtful comment there's one from these fucking idiots that shouldn't be alive parrotting this unfunny shit.

Just include the goddamn fucking quote, that's it.

Even less points to the motherfuckers that write:
nobody
not one on person on earth
not even a single person on the universe
person: <quote>
those deserve the worst type of cancers or torture forms described in wikipedia.

This is a stuxnet level post, I need to get a life.

I believe that I have found the worst feeling in the world.

Not when a push to production on Friday fails. But when a few of your teammates don't want to do JACK FUCKING SHIT. The worst ones are where they think you fabricated projected expenses for raspberry pies, and thus believe that you are apart of some communist conspiracy.

They also believe that cheap AWS ec2 instances are crappy for teaching some basic fucking command line and git to high schoolers!!

I feel like a need a brick handy at all times just to chuck it at a wall.

I FUCKING HATE PEOPLE! DESPISE EVERY DAMNED CELL THAT MAKES THEM HOMO MOTHERFUCKING SAPIENS. EACH AND EVERY ONE OF THEM! EVEN THOSE THAT HAVE USABLE BRAINCELLS FALL INTO ABBYS OF COMPLETE VOID WITHIN ENDLESS AMOUNTS OF COMPLETE, RETARDED IDIOTS. HOW HARD CAN IT BE TO VERBALIZE A SIMPLE YET COHERENT THOUGHT! IS IT SO HARD TO KNOW WHAT IN THE HELL YOU WANT AND IS IT SO FUCKING HARD TO REMEMBER WHAT YOU SAID! DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND WHAT DOES COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY AMOUNT OF WORDS COMING FROM YOUR DISGUSTING MOUTH IS SUPPOSED TO MEAN?! CAN THAT CRIPPLED BRAINCELL OF YOUR GRASP A SIMPLE CONCEPT OF AGREEMENT?!

my whole life is a meme
fucking idiots

Google - fuck you with you service. I made a photo with my phone and it does not show up in google photos and not even getting message why. Go to fucking hell. Burn. You are fucking wasting my time. I should be now sleeping because I need to get up for work tomorrow but now I am am trying to fucking upload a photo to my computer you idiots. And tried with google drive and it also does not appera in it. Fuck you assholes. I feel like breaking my phone , my phone has not done anythjing bad. Its the fucking software.

Looking at code from previous devs...which I now support...

Oh hey there is a function to retry connecting to the database if it fails to open...ok...

It doesn't return anything e.g. a boolean. Not a big deal I'll catch the exception...

It catches the exception and silently ignores it? WTF how do I know if it fails??

It keeps trying for 20 seconds...sounds reasonable...wonder how long it waits between failed attempts...0. No sleep, no back off, literally spams the open call as quick as it can throw the exception...

I'm glad I personally dont know them. They are fucking idiots.

TLDR: Read the post.

Part of me watches the day fly by as I work through the various stories and issues my company has as we walk through the various phases and clean up of their own stupidity of outsourcing. I guess it would be unfair to say “stupidity” It was really a money thing. Excuses aside, the alcohol today tastes amazing as I work through the issues, nothing is ever the same, nothing is ever redundant or boring. There are times where you want to pull your hair out, jump off a building and question why the hell any one would write code, specifically Laravel this way.

I watch the internet from now and then and see the cry babies whine and complain about GitHub and Microsoft jumping into bed and their favourite, and mine too, editor falling into Microsoft’s hands.

It’s disgusting and completely childish, but I digress. The last time I was here the alcoholism and the loneliness had begun pushing me towards the Nicotine and suicide. I have managed to obviously push through and watch the money come in only for adult life to take it away, I guess that’s life. Complaining about it will do nothing other then show others how much control you lack in your own life. You quiet your complaints and bury them deep inside your mind where they fester and stir and become drowned in alcohol.

Dating is even harder, especially when you work from home, so much so that I have completely given up there, any semblance of social life is buried in Final Fantasy 14 online, where pixels and text other people write have become my friend, at least for a moment or two before the work takes over and I sit in a room blaring music and watching the code I write, appear on screen like some savant who has high functioning autism but can create amazing works of art. I don’t think I am autistic though.

The truth is I don’t mind my job, I love the money and the freedom as I stated before.

Code for me is like a seed of anger that starts deep in my core, festering, eating away at me, killing me slowly and branding me a fool. The problem is the best feeling, when there is a problem I can solve it with code, when there is a problem that cannot be solved by code I take solace in the problems that can be. I don’t like people, I hate offices and I despise dealing with my own personal issues, I would rather drink and vape until the nicotine and the alcohol has made me sufficiently numb.

Code is a place I can escape, a place I have control, a place where I don’t feel like blowing my brains out at the stupidity of other people. Have I mentioned that I hate people?

The internet is full of idiots, people ranting and raving about this and that and how it affects them oh so much, when they don’t even let their own code, there own programming problems, and in most cases shitty solutions, affect them. Look at this GitHub thing, the idiots are running around with their heads cut off, waiting for the world to end or in most cases acting like it has. Companies get bought, bill get paid, people leave each other – Shut the fuck up and deal with it.
I guess if you look back at what I have written you could say the same thing to me, boo-fucking-hoo working from home sucks sometimes, grow up and deal with it like an adult. Fair enough, I’ll take my lumps. Excuse me as I continue to drink this post away and watch the downvotes come in. I guess honesty comes with a double edge sword.

And yes I would rather use alcohol as a solution then deal with the issues.

Metatrader 5 mql editor idiots. I have made changes, saved file and it is empty. I can only undo changes, which makes it become as it was before changes. Fucking idiots.

Later I see when I open the file from windows browser in notepad++ - tthe changes exists. What a fuck bullshit. So at least they exists but idiots show same file in metaeditor with old changes after undo or empty if not undo.

In my company we have some awards that are given to people doing some things for customers and doing it good. There are nominations and so on, this year my friend got one for having good relations with customers, being calm and helping them how he can best. Of course there was written something about his calm, helping others, being patitent (...). But nobody from people that he is helping ever saw him screaming like today before he knew that he will be awarded:

“HOW THE FUCK THOSE IDIOTS CAN BREAK THINGS LIKE THAT, THERE IS NO FUCKING WAY”

And he got award for being calm and patient :D

Wordpress.com are idiots. I have free site there. And now I want to edit my posts and I clicn on my site in top left and it does not do anything. And its not a first time. Wtf. Fucking idiots. Even if they made a bug, for millions of users they should fix. Now what , millions of users cannot edit their sites? idiots. And I see no way otherwise to edit my posts or add new.

Or I click write when loaded my site, and it fukcing opens white page. What a fuck.