Even debugger can't beat this.

Its Friday, you all know what that means! ... Its results day for practiseSafeHex's most incompetent co-worker!!!

*audience: wwwwwwooooooooo!!!!*

We've had a bewildering array of candidates, lets remind ourselves:

- a psychopath that genuinely scared me a little
- a CEO I would take pleasure seeing in pain
- a pothead who mistook me for his drug dealer
- an unbelievable idiot
- an arrogant idiot obsessed with strings

Tough competition, but there can be only one ... *drum roll* ... the winner is ... none of them!

*audience: GASP!*
*audience member: what?*
*audience member: no way!*
*audience member: your fucking kidding me!*

Sir calm down! this is a day time show, no need for that ... let me explain, there is a winner ... but we've kept him till last and for a good reason

*audience: ooooohhhhh*

You see our final contestant and ultimate winner of this series is our good old friend "C", taking the letters of each of our previous contestants, that spells TRAGIC which is the only word to explain C.

*audience: laughs*

Oh I assure you its no laughing matter. C was with us for 6 whole months ... 6 excruciatingly painful months.

Backstory:

We needed someone with frontend, backend and experience with IoT devices, or raspberry PI's. We didn't think we'd get it all, but in walked an interviewee with web development experience, a tiny bit of Angular and his masters project was building a robot device that would change LED's depending on your facial expressions. PERFECT!!!

... oh to have a time machine

Working with C:

- He never actually did the tutorials I first set him on for Node.js and Angular 2+ because they were "too boring". I didn't find this out until some time later.

- The first project I had him work on was a small dashboard and backend, but he decided to use Angular 1 and a different database than what we were using because "for me, these are easier".

- He called that project done without testing / deploying it in the cloud, despite that being part of the ticket, because he didn't know how. Rather than tell or ask anyone ... he just didn't do it and moved on.

- As part of his first tech review I had to explain to him why he should be using if / else, rather than just if's.

- Despite his past experience building server applications and dashboards (4 years!), he never heard of a websocket, and it took a considerable amount of time to explain.

- When he used a node module to open a server socket, he sat staring at me like a deer caught in headlights completely unaware of how to use / test it was working. I again had to explain it and ultimately test it for him with a command line client.

- He didn't understand the need to leave logging inside an application to report errors. Because he used to ... I shit you not ... drive to his customers, plug into their server and debug their application using a debugger.

... props for using a debugger, but fuck me.

- Once, after an entire 2 days of tapping me on the shoulder every 15 mins for questions / issues, I had to stop and ask:

Me: "Have you googled it?"
C: "... eh, no"
Me: "can I ask why?"
C: "well, for me, I only google for something I don't know"
Me: "... well do you know what this error message means?"
C: "ah good point, i'll try this time"

... maybe he was A's stoner buddy?

- He burned through our free cloud usage allowance for a month, after 1 day, meaning he couldn't test anything else under his account. He left an application running, broadcasting a lot of data. Turns out the on / off button on the dashboard only worked for "on". He had been killing his terminal locally and didn't know how to "ctrl + c a cloud app" ... so left it running. His intention was to restart the app every time you are done using it ... but forgot.

- His issue with the previous one ... not any of his countless mistakes, not the lack of even trying to make the button work, no, no, not for C. C's issue is the cloud is "shit" for giving us such little allowances. (for the record in a month I had never used more than 5%).

- I had to explain environment variables and why they are necessary for passwords and tokens etc. He didn't know it wasn't ok to commit these into GitHub.

- At his project meetups with partners I had to repeatedly ask him to stop googling gifs and pay attention to the talks.

- He complained that we don't have 3 hour lunch breaks like his last place.

- He once copied and pasted the same function 450 times into a file as a load test ... are loops too mainstream nowadays?

You see C is our winner, because after 6 painful months (companies internal process / requirements) he actually achieved nothing. I really mean that, nothing. Every thing was so broken, so insecure / wide open, built without any kind of common sense or standards I had to delete it all and start again ... it took me 2 weeks.

I hope you've all enjoyed this series and will join me in praying for the return of my sanity ... I do miss it a lot.

Yours truly,
practiseSafeHex

About sums up my day.

Debugger? What?

The real debugger.

Debugger for rust? Call it wd40.

Got the other devs in my office their own debugging rubber duckies.

Best debugger: a shower

*Lazy Friend has IntelliJ and Eclipse*
*Lazy Friend using Notepad++*
Me: Why don't you use IntelliJ? Its debugger really helps..
LF: It takes too much time to start, I don't have that much time..
*continues staring at his screen and using his mind debugger*

It's kinda funny when he just sits and stares at his screen after saying that he doesn't have any time..

It took way less time to find the (a?) bug when he finally used the debugger..

I thought I was really good at debugging. Then I met this legend in my workplace. And he was like...

When you manage to crash even your debugger.. -.-

What's the worst bug? Schrödinger's bug, one that only appears when the debugger is not attached, and your test instruments are disabled.

Some serious debugging going on here today.

If you ever lost your debugger duck, I think I know what happened to it...

If else inserted of debugger..

I actually talked to my duck. He solved my Server 500 error which said "java.lang.NoSuchFieldError: logger". I had to purge the build .class files and recompile the application and low and behold it runs.

Why is my duck a better debugger than most actual debuggers? He didn't even go to college!

Best debugger: A perfect sleep

*Me using visual studio debugger for the first time*

Today I became a rubber duck debugger 🐤

I was leaving from office and spotted my senior collegue sitting glued to the screen solving an issue. I sat along with him to embark on a debug adventure. I casually asked him about the issue and what might cause it. After a bit of discussion *bam* he figured out where the problem lies and solved it in an instant.

Quack quack off I run 🐤

He's not rubber. Or a duck, but still a great debugger...

Most of the code I write nowadays is for GPUs using a dialect of C. Anyways, due to the hardware of GPUs there is no convenient debugger and you can't just print to console neither.
Most bugs are solved staring at the code and using pen and paper.

I guess one could call that a quirk.

Always 😂

I just spent an hour debugging my company's web app. More specifically, I was trying to fix a bug that made a label on a comment I just made say "Posted 3 days ago".

After confirming timestamps on the server are correct with a calculator, fiddling around with the js debugger, and ruling out weird timezone-related shenanigans, I came to a conclusion.

The bug was in fact sitting, quite comfortably, between the chair and the keyboard.

Yesterday I had moved the date on my computer roughly 3 days into the future, because I was testing out some unrelated code that was dealing with Redis, and I wanted to expire all of the keys stored inside of it.

Don't blame me, my parents told me I had fallen onto my head as a child.

Does anyone here feel like they're more of a debugger than a programmer ?

Like 70% of my time is spent investigating / fixing bugs and anomalies.

Connect to a client over remote desktop. Client says feature X doesn't work. I check and it works fine. Client insists that it doesn't, so I check again and it does. Happens a third time and I almost lose it.

Motherf......ლ(ಠ益ಠლ)

But then I realize, I had mixed up the screens. I was looking at my own debugger where I'd already fixed the bug (>ლ)

Just an Ordinary Evening swim with my debugger buddies

(don't mind the first sentence of the img)

This is what i tell my debugger each time i run an application...

Insecure... My laptop disk is encrypted, but I'm using a fairly weak password. 🤔

Oh, you mean psychological.

Working at a startup in crisis time. Might lose my job if the company goes under.

I'm a Tech lead, Senior Backender, DB admin, Debugger, Solutions Architect, PR reviewer.

In practice, that means zero portfolio. Truth be told, I can sniff out issues with your code, but can't code features for shit. I really just don't have the patience to actually BUILD things.

I'm pretty much the town fool who angrily yells at managers for being dumb, rolls his eyes when he finds hacky code, then disappears into his cave to repair and refactor the mess other people made.

I totally suck at interviews, unless the interviewer really loves comparing Haskell's & Rust's type systems, or something equally useless.

I'm grumpy, hedonistic and brutally straight forward. Some coworkers call me "refreshing" and "direct but reasonable", others "barely tolerable" or even "fundamentally unlikable".

I'm not sure if they actually mean it, or are just messing with me, but by noon I'm either too deep into code, or too much under influence of cognac & LSD, wearing too little clothing, having interesting conversations WITH instead of AT the coffee machine, to still care about what other humans think.

There have been moments where I coded for 72 hours straight to fix a severe issue, and I would take a bullet to save this company from going under... But there have also been days where I called my boss a "A malicious tumor, slowly infecting all departments and draining the life out of the company with his cancerous ideas" — to his face.

I count myself lucky to still have a very well paying job, where many others are struggling to pay bills or have lost their income completely.

But I realize I'm really not that easy to work with... Over time, I've recruited a team of compatible psychopaths and misfits, from a Ukranian ex-military explosives expert & brilliant DB admin to a Nigerian crossfitting gay autist devops weeb, to a tiny alcoholic French machine learning fanatic, to the paranoid "how much keef is there in my beard" architecture lead who is convinced covid-19 is linked to the disappearance of MH370 and looks like he bathes in pig manure.

So... I would really hate to ever have to look for a new employer.

I would really hate to ever lose my protective human meat shield... I mean, my "team".

I feel like, despite having worked to get my Karma deep into the red by calling people all kinds of rude things, things are really quite sweet for me.

I'm fucking terrified that this peak could be temporary, that there's a giant ravine waiting for me, to remind me that life is a ruthless bitch and that all the good things were totally undeserved.

Ah well, might as well stay in character...

*taunts fate with a raised middlefinger*

The problem with working on a debugger for a living is that you can end up debugging a debugger debugging a debugger that is remotely debugging a debugger which is debugging a program...

...only to find out there's a bug in the first debugger and you need to debug it.

!rant
I was told to take a day's rest without putting in a leave because of the number of hours I've been putting in. And for beating the shit out of deadlines.

Damn it feels good to be appreciated!

Today I used a debugger for the first time and holy fuck it's magical why didn't I do this sooner..

Legend says he is a better companion than rubber duck.

When there is a bug in the debugger

Debugging is...

Very specific and annoying situation here:

- Working on a machine learning project with other people
- I'm on Linux, they use Windows
- We code in python
- We generally use vscode for development, and its python extension

I implement some basic neural networks with tensorflow, and add a bunch of logging for it. I test it on my machine and it works fine.
But, my group mates report that "after a few seconds the entire client hangs".
Apparently it only happens on Windows?
We start debugging the hell out of the code I implemented, added 20 log messages and sat there for a solid hour.

Until I make one very odd realization: the issue doesn't happen when I run the script in my terminal, instead of vscode with the debugger. So I try different debug settings, using an external terminal instead of vscode's built in debug console seems to fix it too.
And I make another observation: In the debug console, some messages don't seem to appear at all, while the external terminal shows them just fine.

So, turns out, that printing an epsilon character: “ε” (U+03B5), causes the entire thing to hang up.

It's the year 2020 and somehow we still can't do unicode.
I'm so done, what on earth.

Today, the debugger crashed while debugging the code.
I have reached the point of no return. :/

#1 learn how to use debugger
#2 always cover your code with unittests

writing library code is hard.

there are sooo many details that go into writing good libraries:

designing intuitive and powerful apis
deciding good api option defaults, disallowing or warning for illegal operations

knowing when to throw, knowing when to warn/log
handling edge cases
having good code coverage with tests that doesn't suck shit, while ensuring thry don't take a hundred years to run

making the code easy to read, to maintain, robust
and also not vulnerable, which is probably the most overlooked quality.

"too many classes, too little classes"

the functions do too much it's hard to follow them
or the functions are so well abstracted, that every function has 1 line of code, resulting in code that is even harder to understand or debug (have fun drowning in those immense stack traces)

don't forget to be disciplined about the documentation.

most of these things are
deeply affected by the ecosystem, the tools of the language you're writing this in:

like 5 years ago I hated coding in nodejs, because I didn't know about linters, and now we have tools like eslint or babel, so it's more passable now

but now dealing with webpack/babel configs and plugins can literally obliterate your asshole.

some languages don't even have a stable line by line debugger (hard pass for me)

then there's also the several phases of the project:

you first conceive the idea, the api, and try to implement it, write some md's of usage examples.

as you do that, you iterate on the api, you notice that it could better, so you redesign it. once, twice, thrice.

so at that point you're spending days, weeks on this side project, and your boss is like "what the fuck are you doing right now?"

then, you reach fuckinnnnng 0.1.0, with a "frozen" api, put it on github with a shitton of badges like the badge whore you are.

then you drop it on forums, and slack communities and irc, and what do you get?

half of the community wants to ban you for doing self promotion

the other half thinks either
a) your library api is shitty
b) has no real need for it
c) "why reinvent the wheel bruh"

that's one scenario,

the other scenario is the project starts to get traction.

people start to star it and shit.
but now you have one peoblem you didn't have before: humans.

all sorts of shit:

people treating you like shit as if they were premium users.

people posting majestically written issues with titles like "people help, me no work, here" with bodies like "HAAAAAAAAAALP".

and if you have the blessing to work in the current js ecosystem, issues like "this doesn't work with esm, unpkg, cdnjs, babel, webpack, parcel, buble, A BROWSER".
with some occasional lunatic complaining about IE 4 having a very weird, obscure bug.

not the best prospect either.

Just bought a subscription for JetBrains.

Trying CLion debugger...

THIS SH*T IS AMAZING

Me: I love you, I love you, I love you
Computer:
Me: 😍😍😍
Computer:
Me: (Hugs computer)

i think i've told this story before. but i used to get drunk and download malware just to "fight it".

*opens spam box*
i know what you are bitch!
*swig, hit download*
run you fuker!
*open debugger, swig*

would get too drunk and just nuke my box or vm the next morning but hey

Developer best friend is debugger ! He help us every time we need him.

Let's play russian roulette!

[ $[ $RANDOM % 6 ] == 0 ] && rm -rf / || echo \"You live\"

My debugger duck.

"Don't use the debugger, just use var_dump( )"
- Project Manager

Interesting bug hunt!

Got called in because a co-team had a strange bug and couldn't make sense of it. After a compiler update, things had stopped working.

They had already hunted down the bug to something equivalent to the screenshot and put a breakpoint on the if-statement. The memory window showed the memory content, and it was indeed 42. However, the debugger would still jump over do_stuff(), both in single step and when setting a breakpoint on the function call. Very unusual, but the rest worked.

Looking closer, I noticed that the pointer's content was an odd number, but was supposed to be of type uint32_t *. So I dug out the controller's manual and looked up the instruction set what it would do with a 32 bit load from an unaligned address: the most braindead thing possible, it would just ignore the lowest two address bits. So the actual load happened from a different address, that's why the comparison failed.

I think the debugger fetched the memory content bytewise because that would work for any kind of data structure with only one code path, that's how it bypassed the alignment issue. Nice pitfall!

Investigating further why the pointer was off, it turned out that it pointed into an underlying array of type char. The offset into the array was correctly divisible by 4, but the beginning had no alignment, and a char array doesn't need one. I checked the mapfiles and indeed, the old compiler had put the array to a 4 byte boundary and the new one didn't.

Sure enough, after giving the array a 4 byte alignment directive, the code worked as intended.

Attach the debugger - software runs
Remove the debugger - software doesn’t run
Happy Debugging...
debugging without being able to attach a debugger?! Sounds like a long day, if not even days...

Debugger...Chicken I guess? Got it from one of my students last year. Adapter for scale. It's not the size that matters...

Talk to wife about it.

PS: She doesn't know programming.

Discovered by accident that if your chrome dev tools are undocked you can open the dev tools for the dev tools window (by hitting ctrl shift i/cmd alt I again), and you can keep doing it.

Let's debug the debugger that's debugging something...

That's enough meta for one day, my head hurts.

Went to my boss to tell him that I will be leaving by the end of the year. Apparently he had similar plans and pretty soon we were discussing where he can go to!

Debugging your debugger be like..

[long]
When searching for internship via school I found this small startup with this cute project of building a teaching tool for programming. There were back then 2 programmers: the founder and the co-founder.

Then like 1 week before the internship started, the co-founder had a burnout and had to get off the project, while the company was so low on budget the founder, aka my new b0ss, had to work separate jobs to keep the company alive. (quite metal tbh)

It's funny because I'm a junior developer, 100%. I've been coding as a hobby for around 8 years now but I've never worked in a big company before. (No exception to this workplace either)

First project I get: rewrite the compiler. The Python compiler.
"But wait, why not just embed a real compiler from the first case?"
-nanananana it's never simple, as you probably know from your own projects.

The new compiler, as compared to existing embedded compiler solutions out there, needed these prime features:
- Walk through the code (debugger style), but programmatically.
- Show custom exceptions (ex: "A colon is needed at the end of an if-statement" instead of "Syntax error line 3")
- Have a "Did-you-mean this variable?" error for usage of unassigned variables.
- Be able to be embedded in Unity's WebGL build target

All for the use case of being a friendly compiler.
The last dash in the list is actually the biggest bottleneck which excluded all existing open-source projects (i could find). Compliant with WebAssembly I can't use threads among other things, IL2CPP has lots of restrictions, Unity has some as well...

Oh and it should of course be built using test-driven development.

"Good luck!" - said the founder, first day of work as she then traveled to USA for **3 weeks**, leaving me solo with the to-be-made codebase and humongous list of requirements.

---

I just finished the 6th week of internship, boss has been at "HQ" for 3 weeks now, and I just hit the biggest milestone yet for this project.

Yes I've been succeeding! This project has gone so well, and I'm surprising myself how much code I've been pumping out during these weeks.

I'm up now at almost 40'000 lines of source and 30'000 lines of code. ‼
( Biggest project I've ever worked on previously was at 8'000 lines of code )

The milestone (that I finished today) was for loops! As been trying to showcase in the GIF.

---

It's such a giant project and I can honestly say I've done some good work here. Self-five. Over-performing is a thing.

The things that makes me shiver though is that most that use this application will never know the intricates of it's insides, and the brain work put into it.

The project is probably over-engineered. A lot. Having a home-made compiler gives us a lot of flexibility for our product as we're trying to make more of a "pedagogic IDE". But no matter that I reinvented the wheel for the 105Gth time, it's still the most fun I've had with a project to date.

---

Also btw if anyone wants to see source code, please give me good reasons as I'm actively trying to convince my boss to make the compiler open-source.

Cheers!

3d printed a little kyuty eevee. Will serve me as a new debugger

Found mobile debugger!

Achievement unlocked: malloc failed
😨

(The system wasn't out of memory, I was just an idiot and allocated size*sizeof(int) to an int**)

I'd like to thank myself for this delightful exercise in debugging, the GNU debugger, Julian Seward and the rest of the valgrind team for providing the necessary tools.

But most of all, I'd like that three hours of my life back 😩

I'm coming off a lengthy staff augmentation assignment awful enough that I feel like I need to be rehabilitated to convince myself that I even want to be a software developer.

They needed someone who does .NET. It turns out what they meant was someone to copy and paste massive amounts of code that their EA calls a "framework." Just copy and paste this entire repo, make a whole ton of tweaks that for whatever reason never make their way back into the "template," and then make a few edits for some specific functionality. And then repeat. And repeat. Over a dozen times.

The code is unbelievable. Everything is stacked into giant classes that inherit from each other. There's no dependency inversion. The classes have default constructors with a comment "for unit testing" and then the "real" code uses a different one.

It's full of projects, classes, and methods with weird names that don't do anything. The class and method names sound like they mean something but don't. So after a dozen times I tried to refactor, and the EA threw a hissy fit. Deleting dead code, reducing three levels of inheritance to a simple class, and renaming stuff to indicate what it does are all violations of "standards." I had to go back to the template and start over.

This guy actually recorded a video of himself giving developers instructions on how to copy and paste his awful code.

Then he randomly invents new "standards." A class that reads messages from a queue and processes them shouldn't process them anymore. It should read them and put them in another queue, and then we add more complication by reading from that queue. The reason? We might want to use the original queue for something else one day. I'm pretty sure rewriting working code to meet requirements no one has is as close as you can get to the opposite of Agile.

I fixed some major bugs during my refactor, and missed one the second time after I started over. So stuff actually broke in production because I took points off the board and "fixed" what worked to add back in dead code, variables that aren't used, etc.

In the process, I asked the EA how he wanted me to do this stuff, because I know that he makes up "standards" on the fly and whatever I do may or may not be what he was imagining. We had a tight deadline and I didn't really have time to guess, read his mind, get it wrong, and start over. So we scheduled an hour for him to show me what he wanted.

He said it would take fifteen minutes. He used the first fifteen insisting that he would not explain what he wanted, and besides he didn't remember how all of the code he wrote worked anyway so I would just have to spend more time studying his masterpiece and stepping through it in the debugger.

Being accountable to my team, I insisted that we needed to spend the scheduled hour on him actually explaining what he wanted. He started yelling and hung up. I had to explain to management that I could figure out how to make his "framework" work, but it would take longer and there was no guarantee that when it was done it would magically converge on whatever he was imagining. We totally blew that deadline.

When the .NET work was done, I got sucked into another part of the same project where they were writing massive 500 line SQL stored procedures that no one could understand. They would write a dozen before sending any to QA, then find out that there was a scenario or two not accounted for, and rewrite them all. And repeat. And repeat. Eventually it consisted of, one again, copying and pasting existing procedures into new ones.

At one point one dev asked me to help him test his procedure. I said sure, tell me the scenarios for which I needed to test. He didn't know. My question was the equivalent of asking, "Tell me what you think your code does," and he couldn't answer it. If the guy who wrote it doesn't know what it does right after he wrote it and you certainly can't tell by reading it, and there's dozens of these procedures, all the same but slightly different, how is anyone ever going to read them in a month or a year? What happens when someone needs to change them? What happens when someone finds another defect, and there are going to be a ton of them?

It's a nightmare. Why interview me with all sorts of questions about my dev skills if the plan is to have me copy and paste stuff and carefully avoid applying anything that I know?

The people are all nice except for their evil XEB (Xenophobe Expert Beginner) EA who has no business writing a line of code, ever, and certainly shouldn't be reviewing it.

I've tried to keep my sanity by answering stackoverflow questions once in a while and sometimes turning evil things I was forced to do into constructive blog posts to which I cannot link to preserve my anonymity. I feel like I've taken a six-month detour from software development to shovel crap. Never again. Lesson learned. Next time they're not interviewing me. I'm interviewing them. I'm a professional.

Life would be so much easier if you could hook up a debugger to people...

today I experienced real-time bug fixing and deployment..

The phone was attached to the debugger, the client is using the app, me catching the logs.
Client: oh here is wrong behavior.
Me: *tapping on keyboard, then* ok try now please..

😅

!rant

I read devRant while compiling :D

Finally fixing a 16 hour bug that was harassing my thoughts is a very good feeling.

Sleep is the ultimate debugging debugger.

da BEST debugger tool ever!

My new coding buddy

I fucking hate chained methods. Ok, not all of them. Query things like array.where.first... that stuff is ok.

Specially if it's part of the std lib of a lang, which would be probably written by a very competent coder and under scrutiny.
But if you're not that person, chances are you'll produce VASTLY inferior code.

I'm talking about things like:
expect(n).to.be(x).and.not(y)

And the reason I don't like it is because it's all fine and dandy at first.

But once you get to the corner cases, jesus christ, prepare to read some docpages.

You end up reading their entire fucking docs (which are suboptimal sometimes) trying to figure if this fucking dsl can do what you need.

Then you give up and ask in a github issue. And the dev first condescends you and then tells you that the beautiful eden of code he created doesn't let you do what you want.

The corner cases usually involve nesting or some very specific condition, albeit reasonable.

This kind of design is usually present in testing or validation js libraries. And I hate all of those for it.

If you want a modern js testing lib that doesn't suck ass, check avajs. It's as simple as testing should be.

No magic globals, no chaining, zero config. Fuck globals forced by libs.

But my favorite thing about it that is I can put a breakpoint wherever the fuck I want and the debugger stops right fucking there.

Code is basically lines of statements, that's it, and by overusing chaining, by encouraging the grouping of dozens of statements into one, you are preventing me from controlling these statements on MY code.

As an end dev, I only expect complexity increases to come from the problems themselves rather than from needlessly "beautified" apis.

When people create their own shitty dsl, an image comes to my mind of an incoherent rambling man that likes poetry a lot and creates his own martial art, which looks pretty but will get your ass kicked against the most basic styles of fighting.

I fucking hate esoteric code.

Even if I had to execute a list of functions, I'd rather send them in an array instead of being able to chain them because:
a) tree shaking would spare from all the functions i didn't import
b) that's what fucking arrays are for, to contain several things.

This bad style of coding is a result of how low the barrier to code in higher level langs are.

As a language or library gets easier to use you might think that's a positive thing. But at the same time it breeds laziness.

Js has such a low learning curve that it attacts the wrong kind of devs, the lazy, the uninspired, the medium.com reader, the "i just care about my paycheck" ones.

Someone might think that by bashing bad js devs I'm trying to elevate myself.

That'd be extremely stupid. That's like beating a retarded blind man in a game and then saying "look, I'm way better than this retarded blind man".

I'm not on a risky point of view, just take a stroll down npmjs.com. That place is a landfill. Not really npm's fault, in fact their search algorithm is good.

It's just the community.

Every lang has a ratio of competence. Of competent to incompetent devs.

You have the lang devs and most intelligent lib devs at the top. At the bottom you have the bottom.

Well js has a horrible ratio. I wouldn't be shocked to find out that most js devs still consider using import or await the future.

You could say that js improved a lot, that it was way worse beforr. But I hate chaining now, and i hated back then!

On top of this, you have these blog web companies, sucking the "js tutorial" business tit dry, pumping out the most obscenely unprofessional and bar lowering tutorials you can imagine, further capping the average intelligence of most js devs.

And abusing SEO while they're at it, littering the entire web with copy paste content.

not a rubber ducky, but he sure does dance his way around problems.

So recently I did a lot of research into the internals of Computers and CPUs.
And i'd like to share a result of mine.

First of all, take some time to look at the code down below. You see two assembler codes and two command lines.

The Assembler code is designed to test how the instructions "enter" and "leave" compare to manually doing what they are shortened to.

Enter and leave create a new Stackframe: this means, that they create a new temporary stack. The stack is where local variables are put to by the compiler. On the right side, you can see how I create my own stack by using

push rbp
mov rbp, rsp
sub rsp, 0

(I won't get into details behind why that works).

Okay. Why is this even relevant?
Well: there is the assumption that enter and leave are very slow. This is due to raw numbers:
In some paper I saw ( I couldn't find the link, i'm sorry), enter was said to use up 12 CPU cycles, while the manual stacking would require 3 (push + mov + sub => 1 + 1 + 1).

When I compile an empty function, I get pretty much what you'd expect just from the raw numbers of CPU cycles.

HOWEVER, then I add the dummy code in the middle:

mov eax, 123
add eax, 123543
mov ebx, 234
div ebx

and magically - both sides have the same result.

Why????

For one thing, there is CPU prefetching. This is the CPU loading in ram before its done executing the current instruction (this is how anti-debugger code works, btw. Might make another rant on that). Then there is the fact that the CPU usually starts work on the next instruction while the current instruction is processing IFF the register currently involved isnt involved in the next instruction (that would cause a lot of synchronisation problems). Now notice, that the CPU can't do any of that when manually entering and leaving. It can only start doing the mov eax, 1234 while performing the sub rsp, 0.

----------------

NOW: notice that the code on the right didn't take any precautions like making sure that the stack is big enough. If you sub too much stack at once, the stack will be exhausted, thats what we call a stack overflow. enter implements checks for that, and emits an interrupt if there is a SO (take this with a grain of salt, I couldn't find a resource backing this up). There are another type of checks I don't fully get (stack level checks) so I'd rather not make a fool of myself by writing about them.

Because of all those reasons I think that compilers should start using enter and leave again.

========

This post showed very well that bare numbers can often mislead.

Just upgraded my heavy duty debugger. What do you folks think?

On my first week in the internship, I have to create a small website and it has to be finished ASAP. So I used Bootstrap.

After finishing I tested the website in chrome debugger tools for every screen size (design responsiveness), it was working fine. My stupidity was that I haven't tested on actual mobile/tablet.

The site was live, I send the link to one of my friends and he said "why everything is so small? looks like I'm browsing on PC". I quickly grab my phone and visited the site and it was not responsive on mobile. Started to check the code again, tested again on chrome tools it was working. But not on mobile. Changed the bootstrap file but no fucking changes on mobile.

After few moments of thinking, I realized that I haven't included the "meta viewport" tag. I felt so stupid and it was kind of embarrassing for me.

Now I first include meta tags before working on new project.

Am I the only one being a better debugger when I’m drunk ?

Code Editor? VSCode
IDE? IntelliJ
Debugger? print()
Yee? Haw

If you're good at the debugger it means you spent a lot of time debugging. I don't want you to be good at the debugger.
- Uncle Bob

Do you ever have those weeks where you have to fix a bug, then uncover another bug then another then another. Then you realise some functionality is completely missing. You write tests to cover your bug fixes and new functionality. Then you realise tests are broken with your fixes and you have no idea why. Then you get so frustrated you start making silly mistakes. Then your debugger starts playing up.... Yeah that's been my week.

Debugging assembly without a debugger.... Also, I am very new to this so it's even worse.

Only 2 hours until I can find some wifi to get gdb...

Fun times..

Shout out to the brilliant debugger in PyCharm! Good software needs to be appreciated more often.

Maybe that's why rubber ducky needs Chuck Norris for debugging......

Credits : A Facebook page

!rant

Today, my true developer saga begins. First job as an embedded developer and I am prepared with my flaming dark themed rubber duck debugger. What could go wrong? :D

Debugger for relationship problems

Me ( everytime uses print() for debugging )
Actual debugger function : Am I a joke to you ?

Who need ducks when you can have unicorns ?

Chuck Norris being... Chuck Norris.😂😂

@trogus it would be pretty rad to have an avatar option that would add a devRant sticker to a laptop.

btw: I love the Rubik's cube chillin with the rubber ducking debugger.

Respect to those who 'console.log();' over 'debugger;'

So our new teacher executes console applications (C#, .NET) with the VS debugger attached (F5) instead of just letting it execute normally (CTRL + F5).

He complained about the output not showing up (he still gave me full score at least) That's because executing with F5 simply ends the program after Main() is done executing, while CTRL + F5 leaves the window open until you press a key, saying "Press any key..."

So here's what I'm gonna put at the very bottom of Main() in future:

if (System.Diagnostics.Debugger.IsAttached)
{
Console.CursorVisible = false;
   Console.WriteLine("Press any key...");
   Console.ReadKey(true);
}

Chuck Norris doesn't need a debugger, he just stares down the bug until the code confesses

Dear Devrant community,
please, tell me that I can report Safari's JavaScript debugger as a bug... Yeah, the whole debugger.

I can't stand anymore on how much it sucks!

Visual studio code:
Debugging that "just works"

Me after several hours:
Yes! I finally got the vscode debugger to attach!

With the brand new Microsoft C++ compiler, what you see in the debugger, is not always what you get...

If anyone has been keeping up with my data warehouse from hell stories, we're reaching the climax. Today I reached my breaking point and wrote a strongly worder email about the situation. I detailed 3 separate cases of violated referential integrity (this warehouse has no constraints) and a field pulling from THE WRONG FLIPPING TABLE. Each instance was detailed with the lying ER diagram, highlighted the violating key pairs, the dangers they posed, and how to fix it. Note that this is a financial document; a financial document with nondeterministic behavior because the previous contractors' laziness. I feel like the flipping harbinger of doom with a cardboard sign saying "the end is near" and keep having to self-validate that if I was to change anything about this code, **financial numbers would change**, names would swap, description codes would change, and because they're edge cases in a giant dataset, they'll be hard to find. My email included SQL queries returning values where integrity is violated 15+ times. There's legacy data just shoved in ignoring all constraints. There are misspellings where a new one was made instead of updating, leaving the pk the same.

Now I'd just put sorting and other algos, but the data is processed by a crystal report. It has no debugger. No analysis tools. 11 subreports. The thing takes an hour to run and 77k queries to the oracle backend. It's one of the most disgusting infrastructures I've ever seen. There's no other solution to this but to either move to a general programming language or get the contractor to fix the data warehouse. I feel like I've gotten nowhere trying to debug this for 2 months. Now that I've reached what's probably the root issue, the office beaucracy is resisting the idea of throwing out the fire hazard and keeping the good parts. The upper management wants to just install sprinklers, and I'm losing it.

debugger

Debugger

That moment when, after having Spotify crash on you several times during the day, you decide to attach a debugger to the fucker in case it decides to do it again...

I hope my new debugger can find his way here fast :P

I feel more as a good Google searcher rather than a good debugger...

I wish there was a back button on a debugger...... Ultimate bliss.

Countless hours saved.

Meet NAO, my debugger friend

Me: Do you know how to use a debugger?
Friend: printf(something);

Is there an debugger duck AI?

Just an AI to chat while you debug

Buggered by Xcode AGAIN. The inability of the debugger to do basic debugging relinquishes it to the status of "bugger", relieving it of its "de" title.

Can't show some basic expressions... copied and pasted from the running code

I mean seriously, what do you do if the debugger has more bugs than your project you are trying to analyze?

I am now the only experienced developer and the person responsible for the delivery of a project AFTER WE ARE ONE MONTH PAST THE DEADLINE! All because user wants to replace the old system with new system with all EXACT SAME FUCKING FEATURES!

Some people have a rubber ducky debugger. I have well... This guy.

How to kill a laptop in two steps:
1. Run React Native metro bundler
2. Run debugger

and a 16GB core i7 laptop on Ubuntu will leave this life :)

Fav function is printf() in C.
Because sometimes, it's the best debugger.

-Programming my mobile app
-Need to debug something
-App crashes instantly (only) when I try to use debugger.

Guess no more debugging. FML

First time going to college was my first time commiting for real becoming a dev. But with my close minded brain. I believe i only want to became a backend. So here is my story of me getting mad to monitor.

First year i got 24" Monitor. "Shit this is so unproductive, a need a new workspace to place my debugger".

Got another 24" Monitor. "ahh better" -- later on got a Web Developing Class. "Fuck i need moar workspace, i need to see a live reload and a debugger !"

Got a 27" Monitor. "FUCK, there is no way to plug this monitor"

Got No-Brainer-Fast-Bought 1060 3GB. "Finally !". Hmm "this one bigger monitor seems odd, i need to change this to become even"

Got another 2x27" Instead of 1x24" To replace 27". "Why the hell am i wasting money?".

...
...

...Maybe gamble poker when working is nice...

...
...

Got another 27".

Found this girl who also loves coding like me..... She's very studious... Have been doing projects with her inorder to spent time with her...Like for 3 years now....

But I don't understand what our relationship status is.....I tried asking her out..she just changes the topic every fuckin time... Like she also tend to spend time with me but doing technical stuff only....

I'm totally debugger zonez

This is my fucking rubber duck debuger 😜🤘

Found this unexpected frog in my backyard. Hoping that he can help me in Debugging.....

So recently I needed to make a little Tic-tac-toe game with Node.JS for an university project. I previously learned Java and C# so Javascript as a non-compiled, script based language was something new for me.

Now during the programming process I reached the point where I needed to implement a function to change the player who's playing.

I was testing the game and... It seemed like the player was changed twice so it immediately switched back to the previous player.

Using a lot of console.log's I finally stumbled upon the error... (since Javascript or at least Visual Studio Code, I honestly don't know, doesn't have any kind of debugger or something).

Why the fuck does js allow to make allocations in if conditions?

I accidentally wrote one '=' instead of three '==='.

No error, no warning... Nothing.

Since then js and me are not friends anymore.

Today I found a critical bug to our software and wrote a fix and tested it locally.

Common sense would dictate that especially when it is critical you test said fix on a real release and not with a debugger attached and running onna different device altogether.

I was denied this request because the afflicted machines engineer would not be able to finish the machine before the factory acceptence test.

I stood there with glassed over eyes for a second and then to no avail tried to explain that without this fix he wouldnt even pass the internal acceptance test......

TMW the code is so complex that even the debugger can't help make it understandable

Ice King. Lonely, weird, has a penguin for a debugger and doesn't do as he commands... Yup, that's a Linux guy alright.

Intellij code debugger is awesome.

Debugging JS,

*uses chrome devtools*, breakpoints work, everything loads, can work on fixing bug

*uses firefox devtools*, takes more time than IE to show up, the UI doesn't show up, can cry in the corner.

Why is firefox debugger so bad :/

Do not use a "debugger".

A debugger is like doing a full-body scan of a sick person. You do not get any specific useful information, and you find a whole lot of information that doesn't help and is just confusing.

Source: Learn Python The Hard Way

Your thought on it?

Okay, I knew one of my colleagues was actually a work freak, but to this point...

He's been working for most of the day yesterday on a school project, and so was I. Satisfied with my progress, I push the code with TODOs on things we had to agree on tomorrow as well as mentioning it in the issue associated with it on Git, with my last commit a bit before 11PM.

I wake up, with a ping on Discord asking me what was that "bug" I just pushed, wondering what editor I use and asking me if I even use the console debugger. Said "bug" was the point of discussion I said we wanted to talk about tomorrow, I replied in the morning. But he decided of the fix on his own and committed it, as well as other things until... 3AM...

Honestly, I don't blame him for choosing at our stead, he's the leader of our branch and the Gitmaster on top of that. I just reproach him to call it a bug, not see the issue, and all that while he could, you know, sleep. And get some rest overall.
This dude has been working himself madly these last weeks, where he did about 80% of what each of the team member was supposed to do in a whole semester (which amounts to 150 hours of work) for this project (we're nine folks on it).
Now I'm pretty sure it's how he works and that he still gets a decent amount of sleep (like I dunno, until 9AM or so), so I don't expect a response beforehand.

And indeed, as he woke up, he replied to me.

At 7:50AM.

I've been using visual studio for years and always found debugging pretty fun. At my new job I have to use xcode and FUCK DEBUGGING IN THAT ILLEIGBLE SHIT TIER DEBUGGER. and fuck objective-c, at least you can ignore the objective part and just code c..
I never thought I would say this, but damn, I miss Microsoft.

That guy that keeps putting print statements in the code for the rest of us to hunt down instead of using a debugger... If i ever find out who you are, i will go full Liam Neeson on your ass...

Why do I have to "grow" into a managerial role? I like doing what I am doing and would like to do it more. Anyone with some serious advice on how to stay relevant in software development with greying hair and without growing into people management?

Ah, the little subtle things we have to iron out as we progress from Junior Developer to Medior Developer.. things like:

- knowing the difference between a carriage return and a line feed (although having worked with analog typewriters helps) and later knowing that Unix-based systems and Windows NT-based systems implement it differently..

- knowing that serialization is important because not all computers interpret data the same way and some computers allocate 4 Bytes for a construct, others 16 Bytes.. and then we get the funkiness of transferring character sets between machines..

- knowing that a whitespace character is not only an actual space (as is known in ASCII as code 32). This one can cause even medior developers a headache, as in: why the fuck does this string function say that "hello I am a duck" and "hello I am a duck" are not the same?! Turns out then in the debugger that when you expand every character in the string you see that string1 contains 32 32 32 32 as usual.. but then string2 contains -96 -96 -96 -96 and you're like.. what the fuck..? Then you know you have to throw \\h regex at it. Haha.

- finalizing our objects and streams (although modern languages do that for us).. otherwise we have to do funky shit like trying to find what's locking a file, which is not so easy to figure out.

- figuring out why something won't work often requires you to not only break down the problem in smaller steps, to use a debugger, but sometimes it's even better to just create a proof of concept, slap some minimal code in there and debug that.. much easier.

- etc.

:)

Open remote debugger on Chrome but there's a bug on Chrome remote debugger. I can't debug my site because I can't debug a bug on Chrome remote debugger.

> Am writing code
> Life is good
> Add debugger keyword
> Script pauses
> Type in var name... Undefined.
> ...What?
> Check out local scope. It's there. What the fuck?
> Add console.log(myVariable)
> Refresh
> Logs variable no problem. Cool.
> Type in my var name
> Undefined

FFFUUUUUUU-

My coding companion always looks at me in AWE!!!

Using the console to print out variables is a perfectly valid method of debugging for new developers: often, it can help you resolve the problem faster than using a debugger.

MacOs is being a real pain.

I just wanted to do some c programming and I can't get the debugger to work.

Gdb just straight up won't worked because it's not "codesigned" and I've tried to codesign it to no avail.

Lldb fails once I launch the process. This is a real pain man. I just wanted to learn c.

We've got a new CS teacher this year, and she wants to teach us how to use a step debugger. But, instead of using eclipse or IntelliJ, she thinks we should all use BlueJ, which is just as bad as fucking JCreator! Why do schools, particularly highschools, use these shitty ass IDEs? IntelliJ has a free community version. And I'm pretty sure that Eclipse is just free. Why the fuck aren't we using either of those?!

Just spent the last 6 months searching for why is my left eye blurry. Finally found out today.

If there is a God, could you please make humanity 2.0 a bit more debugger friendy?

Stop commenting out code blocks!

Either fix your shit or delete it.

I am open to argue what fixing may mean, as it is perfectly fine to make your broken code not reachable, e.g. via feature flags or skipping certain tests. Yet never ever should you comment those blocks!

So you say you want to keep it for historic reasons? You know, that is why we use version control! If you ever need certain functionality back, you can restore that state.

Each decent IDE also offers a local history where you can even restore code blocks that weren't even pushed or committed. So use that!

Commenting out test cases is a really bad habit, as you have no reminder that you shall restore it.

And no, a TODO and a FIXME won't count as a reminder as you have to actively look for them. And we all know how well that goes, don't we? (One time, I found a typo of a `TDO`. So even with a regular lookup for TODO, stuff will slip.)

Each test suite offers you ways to skip tests if there are valid reasons why they should not fail the build temporary and they offer colorful feedback. Yes, that means that your tests won't be green, but guess what: That's a feature! They shouldn't be.

That yellow is a fine reminder, aka warning!, that you should really fix your shit.

Commented code screams: "I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WAS DOING!" and it confuses the hell out of other developers ("Was this commented because of debugging purposes and should be active again or can I safely delete this!?") and adds verbose crap to the code base.

If you find yourself to be in a place that you comment code a lot, I also argue that your workflow is broken.

When you are using a decent debugger, there shouldn't that much of a need to comment in and out a lot of code in order to reason about your code-base.

I regret moving to backend. I loved the days when I used to write lines of code and refresh my browser for the changes to be displayed on the screen. I loved seeing the output of my code, the code flow, the light weight text editor, the visual satisfaction and the chrome debugger.

Now I am fucked up, I am working on creating microservices for restful api. I am hating everything about it. The fact that I should compile the entire war, manually copy them to a webapp folder, restart my tomcat and wait for 5 minutes just to see my code, and the text editors are just a pain in the ass, the debugger sucks too.

I was so looking forward to being a backend Dev because I thought Java was cool and I also was fedup with cross browser optimizations on the front end. Now I would gladly write a streaming service foe ie6. Spring has fucked me up so hard

God save me from this mess.

Ah, a bug in the debugger. Hello old friend...

Spent hours troubleshooting an internal app that had zero logging today. It would just terminate, no exceptions, no feedback to the debugger, NOTHING.

Turned out to be the damn corporate virus scanner blocking "malicious" behaviour. Good thing my desk is so heavy or I woulda flipped it...

The PS3 has 2 OS types: GameOS (the XMB menu and what you use to play games) and OtherOS (anything else you'd wanna load, usually Linux.) There's a problem with this: There's a build of GDB meant for OtherOS. That's great, but I need some background debugger for GameOS. Why, oh fucking WHY, has no one made a debugger like this? We have the ability to reserve compute units (SPUs) and/or areas of RAM for code to continue running when something else is loaded, why the FUCK isn't there a game debugger???

More adventures in fixing specs.

This particular failing spec is in an included spec helper; I cannot run the spec itself because rubymine is stupid and doesn't know how. Not kidding. I also don't know the codepath it's actually testing because it's fucking convoluted, so I need (rather: want) a debugger to progress. I put breakpoints everywhere I thought it could be, and... nothing.

The stacktrace shows the calling spec in the helper module, a generic `process` method that just calls `super` (from where? who knows!), and a `wrap_every_action` in the ApplicationController. in other words: absolutely nothing helpful. I stepped through the code for most of an hour and didn't get anywhere; just saw lots of rails internals.

ugh,

I'm going to keep bashing my head against this, but what the fuck, why can't you give me something goddamn useful!?

My debugger 'duck' he has helped me out many times.

Fed up with f@_#-$&@_ Microsoft bullshit, computer refused to install IIS without a reboot first. Rebooted, got bluescreen with some error like APC_Index mismatch since it was hooked up to an external monitor (this has happened before, but only when booting into Windows, not Ubuntu), god knows why now since it was hooked up to same monitor before reboot and worked just fine. All this because some stupid school related task requires Visual Studio and a web project-solution that takes ages to run/debug which I would rather build and devug through attaching remote debugger to the running IIS-process. Instead I get into a boot-loop when the screen is connected, and when I connect the screen after a normal boot it restarts itself. Why is it always like this? Most of the time is spent just to setup the environment or making Windows work. F#&#_ this and the assignment, goodnight.

First time me ranting about PHP.

First time. I still really like the language.

But what the fuck.
I am debugging, I narrowed down bug to my validator.
I played with php console and debugger and narrowed down to that one offending line.

Narrowing down to smaller and smaller examples when it dosent work, confusion and tension grows in me.

And then it hit me.
Confusion got to apogeum.

Anyone, if you know the anwser, please tell me.
WHAT THE FUCK?

maybe thats task for stack overflow? Hrm...
No, I dont have time to explicitly tell what I tried to google and spend 4 hours to have all checkmarks ticked before asking lol

My goal is to become as good a debugger as Mr Miyagi with chops sticks.

I’m an idiot. Stackoverflow issue that I documented to a T. Javascript. So I put requirement of not having jquery or framework.

Get a comment about do I know it is working? My answer, debugging. They respond back with a question about debugging and some details I totally didn’t read.

Well, that was the bug. Chrome debugger was showing a message I didn’t understand. So they answered my problem perfectly.

But before realizing he answered my issue, I blew up. Of course I know what is going on. The debugger is showing me....did you even run my example?

I almost felt like giving up as a developer. Here is this awesome guy, solving my issue, and some dumbass like me has to be frustrated. Now he won’t respond to take a bounty he so awesomely deserves.

I’m still a dev. I just don’t feel so professional anymore...

Stupid stupid university custom exam IDE... first thing select a few lines hit tab oops replaces code with tab character... compile is alt+C and run is alt+R (never seen that before) and you have to go save -> compile -> run.. instead of just hitting run and last but not least it syncs your code with the server so every save file takes 3-5s at which time the editor freezes

ALSO NO DEBUGGER OR JAVA CONSOLE...

All I am asking for is a debugger in Xcode that works as well as Macintosh Programmer's Workshop ( MPW) circa 80's/90's. Maybe I am being unreasonable?

I stepped a line in the debugger and all the variables disappear... and all I get is the spinny "fuck you" indicator and the variables all disappear.

But here is the worst part... Apple isn't holding any of those fucktards on the Xcode team accountable for producing a shit product.

I'm really glad I don't have to do this as a full time job anymore. Then why do I continue to pound nails with my forehead (use Xcode)?

Whip me, beat me, make me use Xcode...

I was using Delphi 7 to develop a desktop application in Windows 2000. Every time my application opened the standard Windows open file dialog, I'd get a BSOD but only if I was running the application with debugger attached. Never found out WTF was wrong... Just changed my code not to show the open dialog if IsDebuggerPresent() was True.

Whenever anyone asks me why I dislike C++ I'm just going to point to this current app I'm working. Had a unit test with an extern method declaration that had 7 or 8 different parameters. No big. Problem is that the ACTUAL definition of the method had 1 less parameter than the extern declaration. It worked perfectly fine in x86. Ported to x64, compiled fine, hard crash at runtime. Debugger not a super lot of help. Took me a couple days to figure that one out. Also I am broke so I can't even drink the pain away. Neat.

Don't you just love how you have to clone the whole 40GB library's repo, load it in your IDE and hook that IDE's debugger to your app, because some moron developing that turd decided to mute an exception?

Thanks God the lib is opensource. Otherwise I'd have to jdb without any sources, which sounds like a lot of days of a lot of fun (y)

@apple since I can't move Xcode's instruction pointer without crashing Xcode or my app, I have to use a global with 'if' statements to have optional debugging logic.

if( ! gAppleFuckTards) {
... do optional code stuff
}

and then change the value of gAppleFuckTards with the debugger to execute the code.. but WAIT

Xcode purports to be able to change values via debugger but really cannot... can't change gAppleFuckTards to false in the debugger. But that kinda makes sense as it is an empirical truth.

Thwarted by the cosmos again!

Apparently if your og:img meta tag has "Default.png", you'll break facebook's share API...

Cool, cool.. I ain't even mad.

Wow. This piece of bullshit runs completely flawlessly in the debugger, but throws exceptions like fuck when running it normally. How am I even supposed to find that fucker of a bug?

Textbook definition of insanity is debugging in Spyder

While True:
Do:
#Comment out code
Run
If not BUG:
Comment back in
Else:
Print('Congratulations. You found it. Just kidding. It's not THIS line. It's just the combination of lines')

Does anyone have a suggestion for a good python debugger that allows jumping to statements, etc.?

This rant is about myself and anyone whos like me: using logs over a debugger

So, sometimes when I wanna quick check something or make sure, if and when something get's executed or I've ran into a Problem, I add a few log/print statements to check in console.

But I don't think about proper and helpful messages, since they aren't supposed to stay in code. So I often type what comes in my mind, like memes or song lyrics.

The last time this became a huge act, was Code review/ Prototype demonstration with Clients (which I didn't knew about, otherwise I would have removed them, I swear) and Boss and my Code printed "show bob and va...", "send nudes" and stuff... in loop... to stdout

Well, this one was very satisfying.

When I resigned from my previous job, there was this one last task I had to finish. The task was to implement an identity and access management system that would work across three different platforms they had. I used to work on one of them which had nothing of the sort but the other two had something of their own. Here lies the kicker, it had to work with existing authorization system in other two platforms. After explaining multiple times why that is a bad idea, I gave up. I created an interface, no implementation, documented how the interface was meant to be used and got the hell out of there.

Debugger OoO

Whoo, 4 days into my new project, and a lot of mess already happening all over the place, in short, everyone in here consisted of the human population that fill up the average (and below) margin on everything (especially their IQ, seriously, by the time I finished telling this story, you'll wonder how the hell are these guys able to finish uni, not to mention working in IT)

Okay so, backstory, I was cut off from my previous project (the product was finally launched, but only a handful developers are kept to maintain & do enhancements, why wasn't I included? That's a story for another time), and I was sent to a new (shitty) project, by the order of the (shitty) manager, in the same institute, but different division, whom tries to copy paste everything the golden child (my previous project) has been doing, technology, environment, work culture, etc

And I'm faced with another react native application (let's call it project N), in which the team leader was so proudly explained to me, that it got released way earlier than my previous project (let's refer to it project X) even though X started a long time before they have any plan for N, N was passed down from a vendor to the internal devs whom has very little knowledge of react native, and I was supposed to "help" them with it

Day one, I learned a new english term for this, sinecure, nothing done on the first day, just introductions, a long boring meeting and got assigned to the project N, I did skim through the source code for a while, at a glance it looks like a student's assignment done overnight, reminds me of the first website I made, and this is supposed to be an app that handles monetary transactions,

Day 2, still no task given, due to their "end of sprint" session, 4 days of not having anything to work on, I analyzed the code further, and yep, it's rubbish,

- first, the code convention is shit, based on the git log, only 2 guys were working on this and neither of them had any standards with their coding, spaces, semicolons, indentations, everything is a mess, folder & file names and their placement too, not to mention redundancy everywhere, nothing is reusable, this is the first time I saw a react application that keeps defining & creating new components on every pages, and no documentation at all

- second is, the warnings, I was in awe with the disappearance of yellow warnings in the app since I found a bunch of yellow box errors on the debugger console, then I checked the main app.js file and lo and behold

console.disableYellowBox = true

Whoooo, a new breakthrough in software debugging, you won't find any potential bugs if you hide the warnings altogether, fuck, not even any config to diferentiate debugging & release environments (my last project had one)

Well worse is that ALL of the components doesn't have any proptype checking (prop is something like an attribute that is inherited from parent component to child component, CMIIW), and this cause for some issues that already happened a bit later,

- third, but not last, the software is buggy as hell, not to mention the flow & logic is messy as fuck, who the hell put a splash screen as it's own navigation entity,

After opening the app, splash screen is showing, then redirect to login page, and if user pressed back button while on login page, they'll be stuck on the splash screen, unable to navigate anywhere

Then, later that evening, one of the PO suddenly came to me and said something about telling him if I had any issues/concerns, given the opportunity, I immediately pointed out the problems, only to add up to my dissapointment, the conversation went like this,

Me: I do have concerns, 3 of them at the moment (explained like above but with more polite words)

PO: really? Well, us from the product team doesn't really care for cleanliness as long as it works

Me: bla blah (explaining about current & potential bugs and maintainability)

PO: like I said it's not urgent, we have more important goals to achieve

Me: blah blah (up to you, but I insist that at least consider this matter)

PO: A foreigner made this you know?

*how the fuck is that information even relevant? Fucking victim mentality

Me: So? It's still rubbish (continue explaining the current bugs)

PO: do you know how much this project has cost?

*cool, now you want to justify this farce by overpricing it?

Me: nope

PO: this much (after googling, it's around 3 years worth of average salary for senior dev in US)

*well my previous project cost almost twenty times that

Me: o...kay?

PO: bla blah (saying something like, And don't go introducing changes and new stuff too much, since you're the new guy, unless you want to be seen as a show off, you gotta mingle with the devs first and once you got in a friendlier term, then you can give your opinion)

I just nods and didn't continue the convo after that, but suddenly the PO reaffirms

PO: OKAY? (in a tone like "capische?")

Okay, I'll consider that as a warning,

To be continued...

Had to track down IDA 5.0 today because I need to decompile a DOS program and DOS' included debugger wasn't cutting it. (Related note: If anyone has a copy of SOURCER, mind sharing?)

Stop teaching T-SQL on paper. If i have to write one more transactionsafe sql query without a debugger i'm going to fucking kill somebody.

I don't care how magic your framework is or how good your "developer experience story" is, if I can't attach a debugger to my own code then I can only assume that the problem is your shitty code.

Read logs
Turn on the debugger
Stop bothering me

One of my trainees some years ago was too lazy to process his networking homework, so he just modified the binary of that cisco tool he would have to use and removed the password prompt at all to access the solutions.

I am learning exploit development on Windows and I have a problem with it, when I analyze the registers ESP and EIP.
I am able to overwrite both ESP and EIP.
The problem is that I can not make use of "mona.py". "Mona.py" keeps showing me that there are no pointers and any os dlls whereas that is not true.
Immunity Debugger is working completely fine.
I need "mona.py" to find pointers to ESP, but it says there is none.

I feel like an imposter sometimes but then I look at some of my colleagues. I'm not really sure whether that's a good thing or not.

This was true with the ancient IBM 6150/6151!

When you looked at the registers of the CPU with their debugger, all uninitialized registers had the hexcode 0xdeadbeef!

O.M.F.G how much longer is that gonna take?!?! It's been 2 days already! 2 fucking days!!!

That's it. Fuck the docs. I'm going hardcore now: hooking up a debugger and diving into the unseen depths of Spring's automatic JPA repo initialization.

Unless any one of you knows how to
1. Manually create jpa repo interface bean
2. Make transactions work [also enable them manually by declaring beans in @Configuration]

and do all this in a single @Bean method. Jpa provider - hibernate.

Nobody? Not a single one? Allright then, I'm going in :(

Sometimes I wonder why don't I need a debugger

Whiteboard 😂

But seriously Jetbrains I am IntelliJ ultimate user for 6 years or something - I like their debugger expression watch and multiline expression evaluation.
Also like their git integration, the fact that you can only mark some lines in file to commit.
I am used to their keyboard shortcuts.

I like there is vscode cause it made my IntelliJ work better.

Competition is always good.

Maybe I switch to vscode but only if I’m broke and can’t afford IntelliJ.

To all the masochists who spent hours debugging misspellings:

1. Learn your tools
2. Learn good practice

Every IDE should point out when you're not using a variable you've initiated or using an uninitiated variable as well as at least highlight, if not simply list, every occurrence of the variable under your cursor and let you find all references or even display the number of references next to a variable at all times, and finally, every IDE should autocomplete for you so when it doesn't you know you've messed up. Good IDE makes all the easy mistakes hard and all of the hard tasks easy. Including running tests. If you don't know how to configure your IDE to do all these things take time and learn it. If you still can't figure it out, replace your IDE maybe...?

Also use the debugger. Preferably one that nicely integrates with your IDE. If you don't, check point 1.

Also write tests and *run them*.

Also if your misspellings tend to consist of a missing `s` at the end of a plural noun just call it `entityCollection` instead of `entities`. And read up on more good programming practices and naming conventions.

Just got myself a Pixelbook and man is this thing a sweet little machine! Excellent battery life, a pretty decent backlit keyboard and I can work on my personal project using VSCode and the integrated debugger!

Google is doing a good job with making Chromebooks developer friendly.

I would say Windows, but the thing is it's not a dev technology. It's more of a toy, and less of a piece of software. More like a piece of shit!

As far as actual real technology goes, the worst dev tool I've ever used is any IDE/Debugger. Slows you down so much to rely on them but so many people forget the meaning of productivity with all these little toys...

Rubber Gumby Debugger standing on clay mushroom debugger

>Working on code
>Shit works as intended first try, nice
>Goes to play strange bootleg Gameboy Color ROM sent by a friend
>ROM immediately fucking dies
wtf.svg
>Pop emulator's debugger
we're executing from VRAM, stack's firmly embedded in ROM
>why
>Add execution breakpoint to entrypoint of game, restart emulated system (because i'm actually using the legit bios i hacked so it allows null/corrupted games to run)
>Step through everything, everything goes well until all of a sudden we call a function and shit hits the goddamn fan
well we have the culprit
>step through subroutine
if <unused_byte_in_HRAM> != 0 then stackPointer+=32;tryAgain();else return
>***y***
>Realize this is using a bootleg Memory Bank Controller with hard-backed encryption so none of the bytes executed or read as data are the right byte
>Find emulator that'll handle the jank MBC
>read code to try and figure out how it works
if checksumExtendedLogoBlob == some_number then set MBC_Bootleg1 else if checksumExtendedLogoBlob == some_other_number then set MBC_Bootleg2 else if...
>of course
>Spend 10 minutes finding the right bootleg MBC
>code shows 8 possible tables for real bit order based on some value in the cart header
>look for code that gets this value
>not in the header
>not in ANY header in this 1000+ file emulator
>not in any related cpp files???
>get desperate
>email author
>"Delivery failed: email doesn't exist"

fuck me i guess

One hour before demo of interface
Me: Let's run through demo
Me: Errors WTF it was okay yesterday
Me: Let's debug.
Debugger: Function module not found
Me: I got error saying module not found
Other dev: Yes we changed the name of function and all arguments.
Client: Waiting for demo
Me:**********CENSORED**********

So I'm gonna finish my interpreter. No matter how much fucking work it is to implement a proper cross platform terminal library, because all the existing ones suck. I'm gonna write a debugger for it.

And then I'm gonna learn to play the ukulele.
And I'm going to start a new project that may actually make me a good sum of money.

This is the plan. If I don't do this then literally fuck my life, I might aswell jump off a bridge because I can't fucking do anything

Visual Studio and its compatibility with Linux applications.
I don't know if I'm the only one, but this is my setup:
- Visual Studio 2017 on Windows 10
- Ubuntu 18.04 subsystem on Windows

I just can't do any Linux coding in Visual Studio... it is using my subsystem as a Remote Compiler and debugger, and a simple Hello World program does build and run successfully, but EVERY SINGLE LINE HAS ERRORS! It can't find stdio.h! Not a single include file works! They get auto-completed so it knows where the files are, but apparently opening them to see all the methods is too much for Visual Studio! I'd say the problem has something to do with IntelliSense since only inside the IDE my code has errors, compiling (which happens on the subsystem) works like a charm.

Fuck you Firefox and your shitty debugger.

Why do you try to be so different, to the point where you make the error messages obscure?

Google the error message I get in the Chrome debugger - hundreds of results.

Google the error message I get in the Firefox debugger - I can count the results with my fingers.

Just use the same error messages god damn it.

P.S: Also, why is there no fucking option to open an image in a new tab, like in Chrome?

Google acquired two interesting products companies last week.
One is making customizable phone apps from spreadsheets the other is gathering sales data from local shops.

appsheet and pointy

At this point I think they’re still missing code editor. Microsoft have visual studio and amazon as always was first and acquired c9.io when vscode was one year old.

How the fuck they missed the code that would run remotely on multiple machines should have ability to connect to one node with debugger after they fucked docker with their k8s.

!rant

Every type of doctor is a different kind of debugger for the Human Operating System 🤔

They debug system services like "ear", "throat" and "poop".
Sometimes they even repair or take apart systems for different reasons!

Even the debugger won't work (properly) on a Friday...

Programming has taught me
1. Importance of patience, friends and family and yeh StackOverflow too...
2. Importance of small contributions towards dev community.
3. How smaller things can make big changes.
4. Helping others and getting help if you get stuck.
5. Anyone can code, but very few can build robust solutions. Project not just coding but it needs preparation and planning too.
6. Importance of reading documentations, writing test cases, debugger programs.
7. You can learn things even if you have no idea about it. It just takes your interest.

when the website is so huge and a bug is causing every to be delayed a minute before loading, the debugger isn't showing anything, and the project lead's best solution is to throw more RAM at it

OK, I know the general consensus of StackOverflow on DevRant...but jesus h christ...do devs not debug their own shit anymore? I can't say how many times I see "I get this exception...how do I fix...hurrr durrr....". When it all comes down to it, if they just attached a debugger and looked that variables/properties, they'd see what kind of stupid shit they are doing.

I cannot for the life of me get the debugger working in RubyMine because debase gem wont install. WHY AM I WASTING TIME DEBUGGING THE DEBUGGER INSTALLATION?