Hey everyone!

devRant will be going down on Friday, July 7th around 10:30pm EDT so we can do some database maintenance and restructuring of our cluster. It hopefully won't be down for more than about 30 minutes or so, and during that time you should see our "down for maintenance" message.

If you usually use devRant while you're on the toilet (we know many do!), we apologize and suggest you try to schedule around this!

Please let me know if you have any questions and apologies for the inconvenience.

Everything has gotta have a maintenance break every once in a while!

Hey everyone,

This coming Sunday (Feb 4), at about 12AM EST, devRant will be going down for scheduled maintenance (database server maintenance). The maintenance shouldn’t take more than about 15 minutes.

Feel free to let me know if you have any questions and apologies for the inconvenience!

Hey everyone,

We’ll be doing maintenance on our web server on Sunday, April 29 at around 3pm EDT. The app will probably be unreachable for about 10-15 minutes over that time. We apologize for the inconvenience and we’ll be sure to get it back up as quickly as possible.

Feel free to let me know if you have questions.

Heard the plumber yelling because of the work someone before him did on my heating system...

As a programmer:

Do you want a class to never EVER be deleted?

Just add in the comments that it's "temporary".

Observed my bf spending at least a half hour browsing devRant in bed, so asked him what he'd do if devRant didn't exist anymore.

His simple reply?

"Cry"

May God help him tomorrow for the scheduled downtime... ;)

I got fired.

Worst job I ever had, they extended my probation period, called me "over maintenance", said my work was good but not good enough for the effort, If I take a lot of care doing my work then it's "over preparation", if not good enough then it's "not detailed enough", I don't ask enough questions? I must be unmotivated, I ask too many? I take up too much of other people's time.

Fuck them all. I hope they get a taste of their own medicine.

We got married and started our relationship at 1.0. After our first argument, we managed to patch things up, so it wouldn't all break down: 1.0.1
Same night, I suggested a sexy new feature, and we worked up a good sweat implementing it together.
I got too excited and released prematurely: 1.1.0
After that, she was a bit cross, but then I suggested a hotfix. She agreed and got right on top of it. After a few minutes she finished and managed a release as well: 1.1.1 😏

devRant, the only place developers get excited witnessing a maintenance, downtime.

I woke up nicely, made my coffee and breakfast, got into coding mood, really motivated.

"Huh, how am I supposed to do this... Let's Google. Ah, StackOverflow has the perfect solution to my problem."
*clicks link*
*irritated internal scream*
Noooooooo!

When management measure the performance of maintenance team by the amount of bug they fixed

Because Moment.js is too mainstream,

Oh man I really need to punch person who wrote this shitty file,
1k LOC , whole thing is a mess, this is just a gist of this crap

Hey everyone - I will be doing some routine database maintenance a little later tonight. There might be some short periods of downtime but I will try to keep them to a minimum. Sorry for the inconvenience and thanks!

Scheduled devRant maintenance - I'm going to be upgrading some infrastructure later and there will be some downtime, probably about 15 minutes, around 9pm EDT. Apologies for the inconvenience and devRant disruption :) It will help with working towards an even more stable service in the future.

Feel free to let me know if you have any questions!

A repo on GitHub I'm maintaining has grown with 200k downloads / month since I started working on it a year ago. My recipe? I added an npm badge in the readme showing downloads / month and I responded to every issue and reviewed every PR. Now there's so much issues and PRs coming in that we had to add an extra maintainer, feels great! Teamwork, fuck yeah!

Not every PR got merged of course, but every single one of them got reviewed. Just being a good and friendly developer, giving back to the community that has given me so much. Some tips for you maintainers out there. If you have a popular project and no time there's always someone else who's willing to spend time on it, ask around and you will surely find someone else.

3 years, part time, $0.

I used to volunteer my time to an old text based rpg, handling code changes, sysadmin maintenance and the likes - back when those were a thing in the mid 2000's and money wasn't my issue in life - free for them, experience for me - win win!

Was something to get my hands dirty back in the day and contribute to an active community, but since then that place has shut down and been disbanded.

Client (not for the first time): Your work sucks. I had to have this email formatting re-done before I sent it out.

Me: *sees that the email sent matches the work I did exactly with no changes*

Client (months later): I need you to do maintenance on my website.

Me: *does quick maintenance for free but sends update on status of work done and amount left in retainer agreement*

Client: You're too expensive! You started working with me for $X/hr, then you went up to $Y/hr and now you're all the way up to $Z/hr! You're not worth that!

Me: *fires client by refunding the remainder of retainer and sends client a list of local, cheaper providers*

Client: But now I don't have anyone to maintain my website until I find a new provider! Why have you done this to me? Waaaahhhhh!

Me (in the most professional language I can muster): Because you're a biotch and I'm tired of your verbal abuse. Maybe try not to be such a dbag to that next provider, mmm'kay?

I just love going through the code review gauntlet doing maintenance work, don’t you?

(“boyscout rule” = “leave it better than you found it”)

The Pirate Bay: Database maintenance, please check back in 10 minutes. 13

Me: [F5]

The Pirate Bay: Ok

(overheard colleagues)
"hey, client x wants to speak to you, can I put them through?"

"what's it it about?"

*mumbles something*

"dafuq?! Oh well, put him through already 😑"

Me: hey, what did he want?

Colleague: they wanted help with setting up a page on their site with a maintenance message for when their site goes down.

Me: ah righ.... wait what? What's the function of a maintenance page on a site if the entire site is down?!

Colleague: yeah, that 🤣

Well, okay, then 😶

Manager: I like nested ifs

Dev: They can be difficult to maintain

Manager: No they aren’t I write them all the time!

Dev: Have you ever maintained one?

Manager: No, I don’t do code maintenance. I don’t have time for it.

Me when I get put on a legacy system maintenance project

Maintenance

Not me, but a colleague questioned himself for a while over this one. He simply forgot a semicolon when doing some server maintenance:

sudo yum remove application1 sudo yum remove application2

This didn't just remove application1 and 2, it removed sudo and yum too. One slightly embarrassing call to the ops team later, we had to replace the box.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is why you should automate your server maintenance!

A: man Stack Overflow is a paradise on earth, anything I need is on there, it never lets me down.

"Stack Overflow is currently offline for maintenance"

A: ......PANIC

TROPHY WIFE!!!

Say all you want, the job requires tolerance and ability to stroke some ego. Really demanding hours and maintenance too. I just didn't fit the bill.

Some developers get over-excited about using dependency injection and make further maintenance a nightmare.

"Start at 4am" .. they said
"Nothing will go wrong" .. they said

WELL YOUR COFFEE MACHINE IS BROKEN AND THE MAINTENANCE GUYS GET HERE AT 7 😡

So I looked at our dashboard and noticed a banner mentioning scheduled maintenance set for 7:00 AM. And I thought to myself, "I never released an update, and even if I had, the maintenance would be performed 15 minutes after the build finished, not at 7:00 AM." So I emailed my coworkers, asking if they had put up the banner, no, no. I started pulling my hair out trying to figure out what caused this banner to be created. Was there some old job that was just now running? I combed through the server logs, thousands of entries later, and I found the banner was installed by some user with the IP 172.18.0.1...which was the local machine. I went through all the users on the system, running atq to see if anyone had jobs scheduled. And there was one job scheduled, under the root user. At that moment, I legit thought to myself, "have we been hacked? How is that possible?" It's wasn't! Then I looked under /var/spool/atjobs to see what the job actually was. And then I saw it. My weekly updater cron job had installed updates and had scheduled a maintenance window to reboot the system. And I smiled, realizing that my code was now sentient.

I feel like devRant is now a study experiment to test how long a software can run without maintenance and how long people are willing to keep using it.

Stackoverflow is down for maintenance. All devs over the world are going crazy

Le me: "my code is awesome! The way I did XY and Z is insanely cool, efficient, and maintainable."

Le Boss: "yeah so let's schedule a code review next week."

Le me : "... fuck, Fuck, FUUUUCK!"

Internal Screaming

Sat on the street in the rain doing server maintenance over VPN, using WiFi leeched from the Albert Heijn (supermarket).

You guys get promotions?!

I’ve had to quit and find another job for every title and pay bump I’ve ever received... but I’m at a place now where I’m actually learning a ton of shit, my salary is damn decent (compared to all my previous jobs), and I’m having a blast diving in and working on actual projects vs boring as fuck maintenance / helpdesk type work.

Every time I ask my friends for help:

9 months ago my boss promised I would not be working on RPA anymore.

Monday, at 12:00, my boss assigned to me the maintenance of 13 robots.
Monday, at 15:00, I was talking to a recruiter and discussing my next job.

I
HAD
ENOUGH
OF
THIS
SHIT.

The only person responsible for the server maintenance has put in his resignation period in.

The other person that has access to the servers does not know the difference between production & lab.

Fun times ahead

Has anyone ever donated a website and its maintenance/hosting to a charity?
There's a pet rescue/homing RSPCA centre near me and their website is terrible. I keep thinking about doing this for them.
Thoughts?

MAINTENANCE OF STACKOVERFLOW PLANNED
SHARE TO YOUR NEAREST DEV FRIENDS

Stackoverflow and its relative partners will be closed for two days due to maintenance, new design, and moving server infrastructure from United States to 1km below the Switzerland Alps for extra layers of security. This decision was made by the recent CloudFlare data leak.
Now our servers will be able to handle data leaks because even though the data was leaked, it will fill the empty places in the rocks resulting inaccessible from attackers.
Stackoverflow and its relative partners' maintenance estimated time is February 29 - 30. We will try to finish as fast as possible and bring you guys the best experience. If the maintenance delayes, we will tweet via @StackStatus or post details in our status blog.
Thank you for your support and have a happy day.
Best regards,
Stack Exchange team

*looks for jobs in system administration*

For our client in $location we're looking for a Network and System Administrator ... to manage our local IT infrastructure (so far so good) ... that's Microsoft-based.

Fuck that company.

*looks further*

Requirements: deployment and maintenance of servers, backups and storage, updates, yada yada.. fine with me.
yOU wiLl mAiNtAiN WanBLowS sUrVaR sYsTeMs

Fuck that company too.

Does anyone here in Belgium even work with fucking Linux servers?! Or should I really relocate to the Netherlands to get something decent?!!

We use the best source control software, it allows build and deploy like no other, are you familiar with Visual Source Safe?

I don't know what's worse... That I'm old enough to know what that is; that I know how to use it; the question; or the fact that the maintenance of it stopped 12 years ago...

Client had our company build them a site, they refused our hosting suggestions, and did not want any maintenance on their site.

They eventually left us as a client all together(they were getting other services so they occasionally got an edit or two) and sent several rude emails to delete their passwords so we wouldn't have access to their stuff anymore. I gladly gave the site over to the new company with a solid "good luck." I wanted nothing to do with this client anymore anyway.

Now I'm 9 months down the line and my AM sends me an email that the client wants maintenance. I'm already typing up a ranting email to tell them no, when I decide to check the site. There are WordPress php errors all over the site.

Idk what this other company did, but I want nothing to do with cleaning up someone else's screwups. If I were freelance, this would be a HUGE up charge.

For Fuck's sake never name your variables $a $b or $c. What the fuck I thought that's like the first thing they teach in whichever bush you learnt how to code at!!!!!!

my boss asked me to log in 1h30 after i logged off because "a user has been experiencing this bug the entire day and i should fix it because we're on maintenance tomorrow " but a) it's a known bug that we can't reproduce, he should've notified sooner the issue; b) it's not a big deal, i can fix it tomorrow, it's just not ticking a column in the database; c) I'm off work, go cry about it

The best way to write maintainable code is to imagine the next person who has to debug your code. Then imagine that they have your phone number, personal address, and your daily schedule.

When your birthday falls on the wrong day this year...

Cleaning and Installing Windows 11 in new PCI 4.0 SSD.

Well, sure ... This might be a way of dealing with DNS issues ... for some people.

After a month of testing and maintenance then on the day of presentation the program crashes!

Here's to clients who wish to pay "per project" instead of "per month". Man, fuck that.

Back when I was still a novice, I took on a couple of small time projects from clients who contacted me after looking at my GitHub, and they all wanted to pay me a lump-sum for the project. Because I'm an idiot, I thought sure, what difference would that make. Boy was I wrong.

What followed was me finishing the projects well before time but because of the clients' constant reiterations and changes in design and nitpicking every decision I made while creating the websites for them, the projects dragged on for weeks longer than they were originally intended. And I fucking got paid that one-time amount in the beginning. All this maintenance, for free. Even though I had not explicitly agreed to the maintenance part, since they never finalized the specifications of the project, it just never got "done" officially, and all the maintenance part just came under development.

How many different kinds of disgusting does someone have to be to do this? I should've fucking said NO to those terms, but I had to have experience. Well, nice experience that was. Never again. :(

*During a walk around to check on the users*

Dev: *Watching worker laboriously dragging pallet jack with one wobbly wheel and another wheel practically seized*

Dev: Hey that looks broken, can’t you swap it out in the maintenance building?

Worker: If you do that management will give you one that’s worse.

Dev: …This fucking company

** Worker later threw out his back, company’s corrective action was to send out notice reminding employees to stretch before doing physical tasks

Stackoverflow down for maintenance ⛑

I guess I'm screwed then

😂😂😭😭😭🙏🙏🙏😏😏😏😉😉😜

In a maintenance project where you joined later!

git branch maintenance.

Because certain people like to push to master.

Fuckers stole my ground. Can't have shit in South Africa

"We shall be doing maintenance on Friday 13th at 20:00 hours on our core routers"
I dont know if your insane or what. Dont think it helps that the ticket this created has 666 in its id....

how does devRant make any kind of profit? I mean it's free, they have swag giveaways, server cost and maintenance, development, etc...??

I got in trouble for refactoring code to be modular. They said “thats too complicated the maintenance team”.

Said coworker produced a kludge of copy pasted code so the dumb ass maintenance team could understand it.

tldr; interfaces and abstract classes are too advanced for our employees so make the codebase shitty on purpose.

I visit my mom once a year, and usually perform preventative maintenance on her computer. Scrubbing it for viruses, applying updates for drivers, etc. On one such occasion in the early days, she complained that the PC was slow, and would quit. I opened it up, and there was a 1/4 inch layer of dust everywhere, and any and all vents were completely blocked, to the point that fans weren't turning. I blew that crap out, and from that point on became her IT guy.

Some fun facts :

☻ Programmers spend approximately 30% of the time surfing the source code 😁

☻ Progress in programming can be classified into 4 stages:
(a). Complex Programming
(b). Making Progress
(c). Slow Progress
(d). Stuck

☻ Programmers have a tendency to report their problems incompletely

☻ The main error messages, execution times and runtime compilation errors and the average time to solve them

☻ The software maintenance consumes more than 50% of the effort

☻ Ctrl C, Ctrl V, and Ctrl-Z have saved more lives than Batman tbh😇

How did y'all survive when devRant was down for maintenance?

I personally played Fifa 17 on my ps4 then quit in the middle of a game when I saw that devrant was back online. :D

My windows laptop was having performance issues since last few days.
LAPTOP MAINTENANCE MODE ACTIVATED!
So scanned my whole system with an anti-virus, cleared unwanted data with Ccleaner, quick defragged the C drive, did system restore etc etc, still no luck.
Today I found out the reason: someone had turned the 'Power Options' to 'Power Saver'.

*The Fearless Leader*

I get a call to check up on a robot that has been exceeding weight limits at certain points of its movement (Crashing). As I get to the pendant (robo-game controller thingy I like to call it) and look over the alerts and warnings I notice some oil around the main power box of the Robot.... Nothing around this has oil.. so I start looking around and it turns out that the issue wasn’t a crash at all! It was an oily shorted out wire that kept sparking mad heavy when that servo was called on.. causing a large servo failure that required a full restart of the power box. I called our fearless leader and showed him only to find out that there was a motor leaking oil from the electrical end... My fearless leader runs both the Maintenance and Robotics department. When the motor was eventually fixed we overheard the technicians say that our fearless leader knew about this a week ago and decided to leave it that way.... with oil... coming out of an electrical cable..... *sigh* well Anyway after all the wires were fixed and motors changed. He comes up to me and says that he can’t believe that I didn’t call maintenance and fill a report on negligence of technicians for failing preventative maintenance....

I lost my cool a little, firstly that’s not my job, I’m literally one of the lowest ranking here. I called my next in command to figure out what I should do. Secondly the technicians told me that you told them to leave it like that! So if this place caught on fire this would have been on you!

Later I found out that he was trying to fire a technician and wanted me to do the dirty work.. I’m not going to be the reason another man loses the means for him to feed his family. The technician is a pretty cool and fair guy too!

Our fearless leader was a forklift driver and has no experience in robotics or maintenance... I don’t know how this happens or even why but all I know is this man is running both departments to the ground and management loves him.....

UPS maintenance today in server room...they said nothing is gonna happen..30 minutes later massive blackout and some servers refuse to start...welp there goes my fukin weekend

Pretty fucking sure it’s Monday... Critical Server KO’ed during hours... Going to be a long day....

Sucks not having the funds to implement preventative maintenance and redundancy... Thank god for fucking backups.

To the Level C’s in our company.... take this as a wake up call you incompetent, undereducated, no dick-having-ass’, spitfucks!

Damn maintenance windows. I mean, I get that the SaaS product my boyfriend works on can't go out in the middle of the day. But he just spent weeks on a business trip, with an absolutely mad sleep schedule because he's redesigning their data center (or something. Don't ask me, it's a hardware problem...) and now he's finally coming home today and I'm super excited but all he's going to want to do this weekend is sleep. Even though I'd love to spend Sunday going to this yearly event, or finally getting another round of DnD in (everyone else in the group is available). But nope. Bloody all-hours work is taking away his (and thus my) weekend too.

>Gets a new CPU for desktop (yay, went from R5 1600 to R5 3600X)
>Spends half a day flashing new MB BIOS (Needed to flash individual major versions in order, couldn't just go 1.10 to 6.40)
>Finally finishes preparations and goes to replace the CPU
>Cleans the old one and packages it to give it to a friend
>Has issues inserting the new one as the orientation arrow on the motherboard was very hard to make out
>Spends 30 minutes applying thermal paste, worrying about optimal spread
>Forgets which side the CPU fan goes on
>Finally boots back up... CPU fan is suddenly loud AF under load, but eh, temps under stress are sub-60, so, good

~~Next day~~
>Loud CPU fan is too annoying, opens the case again
>CPU fan is on backwards
Ugh
>Takes the fan off, turns it around and fastens again, puts PC back together and boots
>Is quiet again, nice
>Goes to work on the PC
>2 hours later randomly checks temps because no fan noise is weird
>CPU at 75dC, crap
>Opens the (live) PC, CPU fan is not spinning
>Has put the header on one pin to a side
>Unplugs and replugs it correctly
>Fan suddenly starts spinning very fast and cuts my finger
>Finally closes the case once more. All issues resolved

...Its situations like these that make me wonder... What would happen it I had to work with servers in person, physically lol

So devrant is going down for scheduled db maintenance... Guess they want to make a backup so they don't pull a "GitLab"

Has anyone who's running a start-up had to deal with email happy clients?

I just watched a thread of 14 emails be generated for sending a maintenance contract which was already agreed upon.

Most of the emails are "thanks for the reply........."
To which some one will reply " thanks for the reply.........

No. No. No.

We are NOT rewriting the software from scratch.
Why are people so keen on rewriting? Have they no experience??

Maintenance? Holy FUCK NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Inappropriate experience at work? Here is another one:

The IS department manager 'John' loved shelled peanuts, but hated cleaning them up. By the end of the day his desk and surrounding area were covered in peanut shells (he never bothered trying to put the shells in the trash can). He didn't seem to care because the maintenance crew would clean up the office every night and he would come in to a clean area every day.

That was until the company owner's wife was making the rounds one day and saw his mess. The shells hit the fan. The 'beat down' occurred at EOD, so most didn't witness it, but she lit him up. Almost screaming that he's a grown man and the maintenance crew have enough to do without cleaning up after him...etc..etc.
John never ate peanuts at his desk again.

Dear Comcast, why in the flying fuck is it necessary for you to bring down the entire network for five hours to do "routine maintenance." There's nothing routine about that.

Legacy projects are cancers of this profession. I would not wish maintenance of legacy code(written by someone else) on my worst enemy.

Self printed stickers (I know, they look kinda horrible) + devRant sticker, my Thinkpad needs maintenance

digital lock is broken so I'm locked outside the office. I'm the first to arrive by an hour gap, so I'm here waiting for maintenance to let me in 🤡🤡🤡

The WTF moment when I realized that the main production DB server was configured with **dynamic** private IP. After maintenance upgrade and reboot the rest of environment stopped. When I explained to sys admin what caused the production breakdown hi still did not get that :/

During my 1st internship (IT support for a big office + maintenance of their server) there was a guy that was refusing to read email from his monitor, he had to print them out and then read... We were so pissed off because he was wasting so much paper and toner.

I've had a client for 3 months now and they still haven't paid ($100 just for the site) and are surprised at the monthly cost (they wanted site hosting and maintenance which comes out to $75/month) and I want to fire them without burning bridges since the main person is a friend.

A colleague just hit his computer with a C++ textbook and shouted a verse that easily would have been bleeped out on TV. All this because he could not log into Windows.
Microsoft need not worry, they seem to have fixed any loophole for such bruteforce login attempts ;-)

Nothing sucks worse than being mid jerk off and trying to switch the video, only to find out Pornhub went down for maintenance.

Thank God the hurricane motivated me to stockpile some downloads 😂😂

A nullable boolean in production 😕😯😤

The Fibonacci sequence also known as he fingerprint of God is the most efficient memory maintenance method in computing as well
#weirdcode

Database lost connection to the application.
Chaos.
Anybody did anything on the network?
Silence.
Go to datacenter and start reviewing cables.
Nobody touch anything on the weekend? Really? It is not possible...
45min later looking into connectivity tracing... I just overhear:
"I just changed a switch, but nothing else. This is probably the DB having a hiccup."

Ughhhh! I hate our cable network maintenance!!

Best thing about doing Wifi setup/network maintenance for the local coffee shop for free? Putting my laptop's MAC address into the QOS table and guaranteeing myself bandwidth.

Maintenance

I feel really bad for the guy I'm currently working with. I have until roughly the end of August to upskill him in every aspect of 3 different iOS apps because once I move to a new project he will be the entire maintenance team for those apps. Feel like he is getting shafted so badly. The whole process has been poorly managed. The managers don't care how well I train him as long as it doesn't take too many man-days. And they are expecting that they can still pull me back in to help if he gets stuck even after I've moved. Starting to feel like I'm being taken for granted. Can't wait to get off this horrible project.

2,8 trillion dollar company btw. Unannounced maintenance (not showing up on their status page either). Wanted to publish a fucking ios bugfix, now I can't do shit.

TFW when one of your side projects that you couldn't get approval for 1 additional resource magically creates work for 11 IBM GS assholes. Isn't application maintenance supposed to reduce headcount?

Fuck em.

🦄🔫

So today, me, the pacifistic "linux is not THAT great"-guy, was like well let's try ubuntu 17.10 (cus in the end i want a reliable os with no to less maintenance).

So i installed it next to my loved windows.

Clicking a link seems to have an hard coded delay of about 3-5 seconds until the pages actually start loading in ff on linux, so i was like maybe it's because there is a wall between me and my router..

Went into the other room.

I have one bar WLAN strength. I stand next to my router. What the fuck.

Hmm, could be sth else, let's don't be an asshole and blame linux, let's check windows. Full wlan, full speed, all good.

So my point is proven: you want to fiddle around a bit, do some coding with serial-connected devices, want a shell that actually is usable and you like to procrastinate by doing some random maintenance? choose linux.

If you need to be productive with other things, use windows.

StackOverflow down for maintenance.

Hey Spectrum! It'd be pretty wicked if you could email me or shoot me a text the next time you decide to do maintenance that will result in service outages!

It's not that hard to shoot a text that says "Hey Stuxnet! We gonna be doing some maintenance, so ya internet's probably gonna be down for a bit. We'll get that shit up and running asap tho my man."

First time in many years i just came across the maintenance page on stackoverflow.

Life in maintenance. Cuz it went overflow

!rant

Just deleted 6 files and simplified a process significantly, omg it feels so good to throw stuff out

My product owner was once under the impression that writing more code was something I enjoyed doing, but it couldn't be farther from the truth.

Writing new solutions and patterns is fun, adding anything other than that is just more future maintenance work

Keeping myself from getting bored af at work. I am a backend engineer doing mostly frontend. And right now it ain't even the interesting stuff. I am merely passing photoshop files to static displays.

Kill me. Every once in a while I do maintenance on Java and PHP apps, but still...bored.....more Rails or Django please

BANE OF MY FUCKING EXISTENCE. STOP POLLUTING MY PRODUCTION CODE WITH TEST CODE, YOU FUCKING CRETINS.

My dad let me use how computer and have me a VB6 book when I was like 5.

I took it from there though it seems it tube in the family.

Dad's a Dev
I'm a Dev
My younger brother is also a Dev
My mom is QA, though used to be maintenance dev I think

90% of developer effort is maintenance, not making new things.

When you work with other developers who would, for any feature, small or large, plop in a new library or framework of which they will utilize 1% of... I'm talking about things that we could develop in house in less than a day and have significantly less code bloat... and when you tell them this they smile, nod, and say yeah gotchu, and continue on... AND YOU HAVE TO MAINTAIN THE DAMN THING.

I used to be in an infrastructure maintenance team, and I worked with an old guy. We had a jump box we all used. This guy would work weekend maintenance windows and still be trying to get changes done at 7am, three hours after the end of the window. He was glacially slow. I remember watching him login to a prod weblogic server. He would open the Windows start menu, move his fucking mouse through two or three submenus, and finally click putty. Then, he would type out the FQDN of the jump server, and move his mouse to the connect/ok button. Then it would prompt him for his username and password, both of which took him about 90 seconds to single-finger type. Then, once loved into the jump box, he would then type ssh user@server.fqdn, rather than copying and pasting the server name.

It took him fully five minutes to get logged into the weblogic server. I could not take it. It would have taken me about ten seconds.

Lol 2 hrs deep in procastination, and the boys over at devRant decided to save my soul 😁

I was happily folowing a tutorial earlier on setting up an email server but the site got taken down for maintenance just as I reached the last step...

IT'S BEEN 6 HOURS NOW AND IT'S STILL NOT BACK UP.

I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'M DOING AND I'M GOING TO BREAK SOMETHING AND BE SAD.

Wake up in the morning and my girlfriend told me I have been mumbling about bugs all night. God, I need new projects, so tired of maintenance work

#patchfriday

Last time I spend my night at the DC and doing maintenance, I am going to miss this.

Time to go home...

Why not ask me before going to eat all , {{you}} b*tch
you='Dell auto maintenance'

I was helping a teammate investigate an issue he is working on, while having a lot of stuff to do for myself, until I notice that the asshole was very busy sending personal emails and basically I was doing his job...

Second fecking time since January, I thought these things were meant to be "low maintenance"! (Though in fairness this time is sort of my fault, I may have accidentally edited the MacOS Python files instead of the downloaded ones)

When you think about it.. we, DevOps, are the Mario Bros of the tech world.

We do the building, maintenance and pipelining so that whatever shit developers produce, it would end up in the right place w/o getting stuck

I swear my co worker said we were meeting at the data center at 10pm all week! I call him and he says 10:30. Wtf?!!! Well guess I got some time to read more rants.

Open source software repositories don't deserve contributors like JamesCrook. It's a shame, really, that maintenance befalls on them.

Being in a university that has an eSports Academy is less exciting when you're part of the team maintaining it weekly... Well, at least the part where we had to set up a local cache server with docker & nginx was fun

To leave 9/5 behind and successfully launch my own thing. By design it should require minimal maintenance so I should be good to spend my time however I feel fit. Get my fam and close relatives involved as well.

Move out of that tiny apartment into a large house outside the city where my kids could grow their imagination, have nearly unlimited space to plat at safely, where I would no longer feel squeezed in tightly.

I'm the donkey and that's my carrot hanging in front of me

I fucking swear the power goes out in my small ass town once a week. Every fucking time it knocks my servers offline. I’m about to sue the fucking power company. This is fucking ridiculous.

Yes they are on UPS, they were also on backup power until the fucking maintenance guys decided “on they don’t need on the generator...” you fucking cunt!

Guess what. I will be on devRant in few minutes.

Reddit maintenance.

Just got home from training, girlfriend is out for the evening, no other dues; perfect time to play some games.

...aaaaaand they're doing maintenance on the cables for another hour 😶

I'm so sick and tired of people feeling threatened when improving upon their shitty code! I'm here to do a job and I enjoy my profession.

Don't take that away from me by wasting my time making me say every fucking time that I come from a good place and that I just want to provide a better solution AND not create fucking mess that will have to be rewritten when some ninja bugs occur because of completely unmaintainable crap nobody can understand. Holy shit!

I couldn't care less if you're 10 years in the company. I see that all the good devs left after dealing with your shit every God damn day.

I'm not here to deal with your insecurities and couldn't care less about pointing fingers! I just wanna do better and not write same level of quality over and over again!

You're not getting bonus points from me by sitting on your ass all day and half-assing everything you do with some lame ass excuse.

So no LGTM from me when it's utter error prone shit!

So if you don't wanna help, just get the fuck outta my way and don't waste my time! Jeeez

whole fucking day of coding.
git server down for maintenance so compresses folders / send. lost everything. if i meet a microsoft employee today there will be blood and piss. DIE U FUCKING FUCKS!!€

What cloud service does DevRant use?

Aws Or Azure?
And how much do you pay a month for maintenance costs?

What tables to store data? MongoDB, dynamoDB, oracle?
Or S3 streams?

Just wondering.

What was supposed to be an inoffensive shutdown during the weekend for maintenance became a nightmare today. The storage went to the space thanks to a system admin who was supposed to know what is doing. Since there is no power button I just pulled the power cord, he said.

My patience runs out on people who I'm close with comes to me for free pc maintenance.

So I asked this question yesterday to linuxxx and he had some great tips. But I thought there might be some Linux fanatics here who also have some experience working with vps's that you might have somethings to add something 😁

Recently I got asked if I want to help maintain our webservers (they all run Ubuntu 18.04 with standard webserver stuff, nginx, MySQL, php, ssh)

Does anyone know of some tips or share some helpful knowledge regarding maintaining a VPS? / Keeping it healty?

Create a copy of a huge method, I mean a complete fucking copy of a huge method, to change one small piece just because the behavior needs to be different in his specific case. Then, when the method is called, put an "if is my case, call my fucking copy".

Maintenance? What's that?

dont worry

O well, there go my plans for this evening

Being assigned an old system that has scarce/cryptic documentation and uses global variables for everything. Not a maintenance nightmare at ALL.

this year i finally found a job where I don't feel like dying, and it pays well. things are going so smoothly that I'm a bit weirded out, in a good way.
the work as a dev requires creativity and is mentally exhausting, but i got a nice routine going on (not a lot of programming, mostly database maintenance), and even with the high pressure I'm still fine :)

Stackoverflow(ed)!!

Lucky to see this today.
Must say, the very next page refresh the site was up.

Don't know if it was really a maintenance or just an alternative message in some cases.

Had this been continued for some more time then many tasks' dev completion dates would have got affected. 😬

Too much technical debt
Write more unit tests
Unit tests failing, the code will be right so change the tests to pass
Too many unit tests to maintain, they look a lot like technical debt
Remove unit tests to reduce maintenance overhead

the worst documentation I've dealt with was (sadly) some I wrote myself.

We had a project - build with no maintenance agreement attached. so I half-assed the docs and tests... a year after launch we sign a support agreement and I'm struggling to figure out how the damn thing works!

Swear work is where you I go to fix other peoples poor design decisions and clean up the bullshit that comes out of said decisions.

CANT!
BE!
FUCKED!

How you have so many years experience and still design in way that ensures that maintenance /improvements/touching in the future is a huuugggeee clusterfuck.

Hey, I got an idea, lets make this whole data warehouse without a single index or primary key cos you know, that's the Kimball Method.

the first most annoying thing in devrant are new users

the second most annoying thing is "new comments on a rant you commented on" notifications. They require maintenance work, and I can't even mute threads on desktop

Person 1 to me: Website C needs this update.

Me: I don’t maintain that site. I only maintain websites A and B. I don’t know who does maintenance for your site.

Person 2 to me: Website D needs this update.

Me: I only maintain websites A and B.

Person 3 to me: Website E needs this update.

Aaaahhhhh 😫😡

I think this company expects me to do maintenance on this app I built them for free 🙄 not happening you wanted it public that's sign off for the final product not my fault

I'm doomed.

Midnight sever deploys and maintenance might kind of suck to do, but it is probably the closest we will get to going on a top secret mission!

Error reporting was flooded with failed database connection connections with me being baffled what was causing it.

Yeah, fucking network operator didn't tell us anything about maintenance work. Fuck you, too.

I've worked on a year to replace an old legacy system after years of shitty maintenance. We're almost there. So damn fucking close.

Is there a chance to realize your business project? What to do with competition and increasing costs for office maintenance?

If all else fails, perform percussive maintenance on OSI layer 8.

I have so much work to get done I don't even know where to start anymore. I've got 6 sites in development, 20 sites with continuing maintenance, and I'm in charge of everything IT in my office.

Today I asked if the other developer on our team could help out and take a few maintenance clients off my hands so I could work on getting builds done.

We called a team meeting where I explained my workload and pointed out that in order to make the deadline of next week on two of these builds our other developer is going to have to help out with some of the work on my plate.

Other dev: Well I've already got 3 sites that still need maintenance this month and I'm still working on $client site.

Me: Ok well today is only the 3rd so you have all month to do the maintenance on those sites, these two have to be online next week and I still have 100 hours of work to do between the two of them.

Me to CTO: can I get some backup here? Or can we hire me a monkey (my term for interns) for a couple weeks so I can focus on building?

CTO: We'll have to talk about that at our meeting next week. In the mean time, just do what you can to get the sites done and let me know if you think we aren't going to make the deadlines.

Me: That's what this conversation is, I'm telling you now, and I've been telling you for 3 weeks that we were getting close to my limit for my workload. We have approximately 175 work hours in a month, maintenance contracts alone accounts for 120 of those hours.

CTO: Alright, well if after Monday you don't think you're going to make the deadline (Thursday), then we'll see if we can find a solution.

Fuck this shit, I get paid the same whether the client is happy or not, I get paid the same whether we reach the deadline or not. I asked that salespeople stop making deadline promises before developers get to look at the scope but that's not the way we do things here. At least one of these sites is not going to be online Thursday, probably both.

Fixing the other developers shit is a shit....

Agency developers, what do you do with bugs. If bugs come up after a year do you charge your customers? Or do you have maintenance agreements?

I need guidance about my current situation.
I am perfectionist believing in OOP, preventing memory leak in advance, following clean code, best practices, constantly learning about new libraries to reduce custom implementation & improve efficiency.
So even a single bad variable name can trigger my nerves.

I am currently working in a half billion $ IT service company on a maintenance project of 8 year old Android app of security domain product of 1 of the top enterprise company of the world, which sold it to the many leading companies in the world in Govt service, banking, insurance sectors.

It's code quality is such a bad that I get panic attacks & nightmares daily.

Issues are like
- No apk obfuscation, source's everything is openbook, anybody can just unzip apk & open it in Android Studio to see the source.
- logs everywhere about method name invoked,
- static IV & salt for encryption.
- thousands of line code in God classes.
- Irrelevant method names compared to it's functionality.
- Even single item having list takes 2-3 seconds to load
- Lag in navigation between different features' screens.
- For even single thing like different dimension values for different density whole 100+ lines separate layout files for 6 types of densities are written.
- No modularized packages, every class is in single package & there are around 100+ classes.

Owner of the code, my team lead, is too terrified to change even single thing as he don't have coding maturity & no understanding of memory leak, clean code, OOP, in short typical IT 'service' company mentality.

Client is ill-informed or cost-cutting centric so no code review done by them in 8 years.

Feeling much frustrated as I can see it's like a bomb is waiting to blast anytime when some blackhat cracker will take advantage of this.

Need suggestions about this to tackle the situation.

In production, whenever nginx can't find an upstream it will display a static 'maintenance' html file that tells the user the come back later

In development, it shows clippy :D

Mentoring someone in iOS from scratch, then teaching him how to maintain 3 different apps. He is able to maintain them without me now which is testament to how well I taught him, but it was challenging. Especially since I had to simultaneously work on other tickets and live prod issues.

I bought an aquarium, needs some weekly maintenance, is very comforting to watch and it is nice to see things grow.

Previous company turned from Web Dev E-Mail Marketing into a Service company with more than 50% phone support so I left.
New company, Product focused on web and mobile. 2 months in: Well yeah guys, new strategy. We'll stop feature dev on the web and go into maintenance mode.

That's just great. Thank you very much.

Now I'm too lazy to go through hiring again and just feed my inner rage.

It's hard to keep it in sometimes =__=

Current status: Writing a markdown document containing all my tips and tricks for fixing bugs in our apps so we can handover to maintenance. Including files I commonly have to look in, handy keyboard shortcuts, IDE settings and other tools that have made debugging easier. I figure if these guys are having a bunch of legacy apps dumped on them when they have no iOS experience, I should help them out as much as I can before I move projects.

Why people loves Java? It's because the maintenance or something in architectural level? I don't understand, because we have languages like Python with a better syntax and languages like C++ with a better optimization and speed of processing

Dijkstra 1988: "Unfathomed misunderstanding is further revealed by the term 'software maintenance', as a result of which many people continue to believe that programs —and even programming languages themselves— are subject to wear and tear. Your car needs maintenance too, doesn't it?"
npm 2018: "Naaaah!"

If for some reason you decide to write a shim for a VERY COMMON LIBRARY in your project:

1. DON'T
2. If you decide to ignore (1), at least make sure the SHIM WORKS THE SAME WAY AS THE LIBRARY

Two days of debugging sudden untraceable errors led me to find that a .so wasn't copied correctly during maintenance. fml

That moment stack overflow is down for maintenance.... *panic increases*

More tales from University Tech Support:

Haven't been able to get ahold of this staff member for weeks to do required maintenance. Emails, VMs, surprise office visits, she's never anywhere to be found.

Finally my boss emails her with the subject line "Free Money", and gives her some sass in the email about calling IT back.

Yeah, she responded in minutes...

Trying to setup a staging server boss says just use AWS, system admin doesn't like that thought because it doesn't involve him so waited all day for 3 VM's and still not ready... All I need is 3 blank CoreOS VMs nothing fancy like even doing the cloud config no. Anyone else has colleagues scared of moving out of the private high maintenance servers in the basement?

I actually like that there's a new library every minute in js world.

more maintenance required means more demand for developers. planning our own survival, not obsolescence.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!1!!!!11!!1!!!!!!!

THE WORLD IS DOOMED!

!dev

Last year, we got a new DOCSIS modem from our ISP (Puma6-chipset, nuff said, not allowed to replace it with a proper one).
With this replacement modem came a splitter (to split internet signals from TV signals), keep this in mind for later.
It worked alright for a while, but fast forward to last Januari, our internet started acting up because the modem kept randomly rebooting.

So we had 3 maintenance workers come by already.
The first one replaced the wallplug.
The second one replaced the wallplug, saying that the previous maintenance worker did a shit job.
The third one replaced the splitter.

Now, later that evening, we got an email... stating that the costs would be 50 euro...
Ehm... what?

So I went to contact their customer servers and they said "but the splitter is part of the indoor installation. So if this splitter causes a malfunction, the maintenance worker will charge you for the visit".

So these fucking assholes give me a defective splitter and charge us to have it replaced?
They can suck my big black.

Still going on with the dispute now because that is some top level bullshit.
"What if it wasn't the fault of the splitter? Am I gonna get my money back?"

Every one of our sprint "planning" meetings.
We would sit and be told to estimate a bunch of defects we had never seen before. And then we wouldnt actually decide as a team what to commit to because it was assumed that we had to deliver everything in the backlog every sprint. This is what happens when you try to apply scrum to a maintenance team.

Well I ended up getting two jobs through my college so now I've gotta pick between:
- A legacy maintenance job with a better environment and salary, for a minimum of two years.
OR
-An IT based job with a lower salary but no fixed initial working period.

Advice devRanters?

PS: I am in debt because I took a loan for college tuition. 😐

*Confused*

I have two potential client meetings next week. The first one now knows she needs a website (but I have no clue what her budget is), I think she wants me to host the site as well as do site maintenance. The second potential client I'm working using the barter system (but I think she will end up owing me some money at the end). We will see how they both go.

"Could not complete cursor operation because the table schema changed after the cursor was declared"

So, our customer is updating their side of the database, while their own users continue to use our software. Would've been nice if we got word of the maintenance window too.

Guys I need help, I've never worked with the maintenance of a website before... And I don't know how much money can I get doing that

Tonights music while doing maintenance work

> Start a new project
> Search for modules / libraries you will need
> Find something promising
> See that it's not well maintained
> I'm just gonna send a quick PR
> Proceed to rewrite most of it.
> Huh ..
> Repeat~

Professional Home File Server Setup.

Using an old laptop and drive I made this. But I had nowhere to store. I have to use Team Viewer to even access it now for maintenance.

Been griping at my boss about this since I took the job.

How much time on average do you spend doing programming related things?

This could be anything involved in the development of a program or maintenance of existing program.

Monday morning break for developers as ...

One of my biggest pet peeves with C++ are the number of ways to do things that, I personally, don't think their should be. Is that int* really an int pointer? Or is it an int array? Int vector? I am really regretting the refactoring approach I took.

Holy fuck, I though working with Wordpress was a fucking nightmare, but it’s a dream compared to the shit I am estimating maintenance on...
It’s running on Asp.net and the Sitecore cms... I have no fucking clue what the fuck is going on anywhere

I’ve estimated 3-4 days for doing basic maintenance like improving SEO and fix some minor semantics. Everything is wrapped in a fucking <form> element, I mean every fucking thing. It goes;
<body><form method=POST>shit content</form><body>

My boss was not opposed to the idea giving me the title "Production Implementation and Maintenance Professional". If I send it to him in an E-mail he forwards it to HR.

Do ergonomic keyboards and mice help?

Yesterday I went through 6 hour maintenance without a break which involved a lot of typing and clicking.... (Because shit never works properly on live server, right?)
And now my right shoulder through my wrist feels numb.

I'm thinking maybe it's time to give up on 'gaming' rigs...
What are your thoughts?
Or should I just stretch more often?

About to release my first Android app backed with a NoSql database. Anyone here ever had an experience maintaining one?

In 50% of my cases, I need to go into emergency mode and re-attempt the mounting since some partition failed to mount.

Anyone having a similar case where you need to semi-manually keep to "hit your old distro to keep running"?

Personally, I'm fine with that. Running an about 4-5 year old Manjaro installation where I did a lot with it. I see it a testament to my learned knowledge that I can keep ot running.

I'm so fed up with my current work, I'm actually considering doing WordPress work...

Old client asked if I could do DNS/MX maintenance so she could refer me but didn't mention WordPress...

I don't think it would be "fair" to charge full rate for it, but I will - was hoping for a ~2 hours a week side thing, but they need 20 to 30 websites maintained

...
...
...

McDonald's has a Window problem... And a really slow customer...

I have a buying problem tho.... Just bought an OP6 this morning and rationalized it by saying I need a new camera and my monthly maintenance is $500 anyway so...

I am very close to being a violent psychopath from "Always code as if the person who ends up maintaining your code is a violent psychopath who knows where you live."

Foreach within a foreach with counters and a check if the counters match in the inner foreach and in that case do something.... And that's not even the worst part of the code I have to modify ever so slightly... Fml

It makes my blood boil when my colleagues (who have been here for ages) know that maintaining dependencies in code is important but don't even action it because they give the excuse of having no time or the pressure of finishing it on time.

It angers me that I'm now in .dll hell and they don't even consider the time or push a valid case to fix the issue. It also frustrates me as I've realised that they have grown complacent/indifferent, not even attempting to change it.

When I thought things couldn't get crazier that my vmware to win chrome mess.....

Doing an upgrade today when I have to VPN in from my mac to access a Web based secret server to get onto another VPN so I can RDP onto a Windows bastion host to then RDP to client windows servers within the RDP and from those hosts need to use putty to ssh into Linux servers to do the admin activities......

Now I'm obviously all for security but seriously VPN to RDP to RDP to ssh is just a bit mental......

But all of the SSL certs between each env is self signed anyhow......

Current Mac and Windows user here looking to get back into Linux. Any distro suggestions?

Looking for something not too high maintenance.

Brain of a normal person is like an SUV — versatile, robust, occasionally kinda fast, needs minimal maintenance.

Brain of a bipolar person is like a supercar — needs a lot of maintenance, can't go off-road, can only drive on a perfect track without destroying itself, only takes special, expensive kind of fuel, can't drive in the winter.

Yes, you boubas can perform better when I'm depressed. But when I'm manic, your skill and your experience don't matter. I'm gonna tear you apart. I'm not gonna take your job — I'll take your bosses and will replace you with a script I wrote in 20 minutes. I'll again spend three hours and take Product of the Day. I'll again take the CTO job without even applying.

Mania is like taking quad damage AND god mode.

But in two weeks, I'll be depressed again. sleeping for 13 hours and not able to work.

Too bad mania is temporary, but achievements are forever. Good luck

When StackOverflow is under maintenance - your work is stuck..

Valve

i love their games and the whole model of community but now its just become a big cash grab for MOBA players. nothing against the ppl that enjoy DOTA, i just wish all the other games that still have a lively community got the same level of maintenance and attention.

Dear clients

Websites are not a turnkey business.
Your site is going to need maintenance overtime. And you are going to need to pay for it.

When you have some important system maintenance planned but your body says "not this time wolke" and just gives you 3 days off with sickness :<

The manager that believed that sharing code was bad. We had a web and a windows client over the same db. No code shared. He'd rather duplicate the code and maintenance than share it. And the BL should be put in stored procedures, 'cause that's so easy to change in-flight...

Stack Overflow down for maintenance...

:(

Good Lord!

FP looks nice, feels right, scratches the itch when written well, but supporting, debugging and fixing/extending it is a fucking hell!

Well, it's either FP or TS/Node.

I need to write the maintenance document in case I die.

Any idea what to include?

I have written a lot of software which include family business and other business depend on by myself.

I have an idea of adding my git user name and password. Email and social media user name and password.Configuration file/Configuration property. Troubleshooting information.Program overview.