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I imagine two dev colleagues sitting next to each other, on their phone, each feeling very secure in the anonymity of devrant.
11 -
I just can’t imagine it.
( ._.) “Hey dude, I code. Do you?”
(.-. ) “Same”
( ._.) “Friends?”
(.-. ) “Friends”125 -
Want to understand a DDOS attack?
Imagine trying to work while being interrupted every few seconds.. forever.
Just like an open office!4 -
Try to imagine how many HOURS of admins all around the world time will Ubuntu 18.04 LTS save thanks to this little change!
13 -
Imagine being a gitlab employee scrolling through devRant being the reason for 90% of todays rants6
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You got to love that alignment, it's ok though, imagine if they wrote a whole framework... Ohh wait...
9 -
Anything with Jetbrains on the cover, IDEA, Android Studio, Clion. Can't imagine how I'd work if these IDEs weren't doing half the work for me.12
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Damn!
Sometimes I just wonder about the level of customization you get at Linux. You can't even imagine a desktop that looks like this on Windows.
37 -
A developer's worst nightmare is having amnesia.
Imagine being an expert in 6 programming languages and you suddenly lost your memory.
YOU'RE IN DESTINATION FUCKED ALREADY.5 -
I imagine those researcher must be like : "Would you give us your password? It's for a research project"
3 -
Just imagine, if someday some client or some manager logs on to devrant and see the amount of hate we people give them... Just imagine their faces 🐑😂😂😂😂5
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How I imagine everyone sees a rant about Google that says anything remotely good towards Google itself...
6 -
Found this in a legacy codebase at work. Can't imagine what the coder was thinking. "Just in case"?
5 -
imagine the new try/catch block
try
..
catch
...
finally
....
please
...
how dare you?! (Application.Exit())4 -
I'm typing this with my mouse and an on-screen keyboard, because I don't have my physical one at the moment...
Fuck, imagine coding with a mouse...6 -
This is how I imagine the apocalypse is going to look like...
(All these website are down/experiencing issues because fastly is down)
15 -
One day you’ll write a line of code which will be your very last one.
Imagine wasting it on something like php.10 -
imagine if devRant had a programming language
#define SHITS_I_GIVE 0
codes START_BITCH() {
FUCKING_DISPLAY("FUCK YOU WORLD\n");
COCKSUCKER_INT counter_bitch = 0;
DURING(counter_bitch < SHITS_I_GIVE) {
FUCKING_DISPLAY("I DON'T GIVE "); FUCKING_DISPLAY(counter_bitch);
FUCKING_DISPLAY(" FUCKS,\n");
}
FUCKING_DISPLAY("SUCK A COCK ASSHOLES");
}19 -
Hands.
Imagine how hard typing could be without hands.
"Look Mom!! No hands"
*bashing head on memeboard to code*
*best tool ever*10 -
Imagine telling our distant ancestors we can talk to any person anywhere in the world by tapping fingers against the glass
9 -
"I have this great idea for an app, it'll be like Facebook but better"
How I imagine the conversation went before devrant was made3 -
Could you imagine if each ++ you got in devRant was equal to a bitcoin?
Maybe we should make our own community currency. We can call it rantCoin.10 -
The usb killer.
Imagine putting a couple of these at school, that'll teach them not to steal usb's!
https://usbkill.com/usb-killer/...
5 -
If the requirements are this stringent in the job posting, I can't imagine how terrible it would be to work for this person.
9 -
1. Set your podcast player to 0.5x speed
2. Listen to your favorite dev podcast
3. Imagine they're all drunk
4. Profit -
The best way to write maintainable code is to imagine the next person who has to debug your code. Then imagine that they have your phone number, personal address, and your daily schedule.8
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Brand new PC build. 5950X, 128Gb RAM, 6900XT, 8Tb of gen 4 NVME storage. Decided to install Win11 just for shits and giggles. Imagine my surprise when...
19 -
Could you imagine a guy who takes A4 paper with encrypted text using modern algorithms and decrypts it in 20 minutes which pen and his mind?4
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Dennis Ritchie.
Can't imagine life without C, I mean what if C wasn't even invenented? What if Unix wasn't there?
Dayumn!!!7 -
Imagine saving Integers and Floats in a MySQL table as strings containing locale based thousand sepatators...
man... fickt das hart!
Wait, there's more!
Imagine storing a field containing list of object data as a CSV in a single table column instead of using JSON format or a separate DB table.... and later parsing it by splitting the CSV string on ";"...7 -
Oh man.
I imagine the face of the guy who deleted Gitlab production database when he realized what he had done.6 -
Recently I learned about the song "Bück Dich" from Rammstein.. just imagine showing that shit to the "I'm offended by terminology in code" SJW's 🤣
https://youtu.be/jJqy_f83QAo6 -
Imagine if everybody would actually answer with the truth to the question "How are you?", instead of going with the classic "fine, thank you" polite answers.17
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Imagine posting something about nvm (node version manager) and then quitting via nvm figured out thingy
Imagine proposing an actual `nvm figured out` command to nvm team and then it’s implemented so you can legitimately post “nvm figured out” as a solution
2 -
Imagine
websites didn't use unnecessary cookies,
JavaScript was only used when needed,
no trackers, no ads, no telemetry, no user
data saved when it doesn't benefit the user.
*Wakes up in cold sweat*9 -
At my job there is little to none documentation of the software. Software is from 2000 and updated since...
Imagine the features no one knows about.4 -
Rant: Wifi in Italian AirBnB, They use 3 wifi repeater to get internet from one house to the next, I guess you can imagine the speed3
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Fucking hell. Falling asleep is literally the hardest thing I can imagine. And I have to do it every fucking day14
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Just startup stories:
Our backlog of tasks and bugs has officially reached 100+ tickets, all for me, the single software engineer at our "tech" company.
Huh, imagine that.3 -
Excuse me, but what the actual FUCK? My eyes are burning. I don't even want to imagine how the CSS looks...
4 -
my boss is using internet explorer for everything
i cant even imagine how he can put up with its slowness and awful interface and everything else4 -
Hahaha, well would you Imagine my shock?
https://pcmag.com/news/357465/...
But then again people enable this personal hell to happen
5 -
I'd never imagine that my interests would shift from webapps and servers to embedded devices and measuring 500volts with an arduino....1
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Programming makes one more logical.
Except, when programming makes managers imagine they are more logical.1 -
Oh how I like devrant everyday more and more- can you imagine if every job kind would have something like .this? (e.g waiter.Rant) this is so inspiring how everyone is opening up and speaking about motivation, inspiration, fails, mistakes. We are not perfect and we should learn from each other, so the message the devrant unconditionally says is 'be opened ' speak up . P.s this is like coffee for thinking, stimulates to not just sit and work but think and inspire Do something bigger and share , Move your thoughts thank you devs especially founders2
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Brain: Imagine if human live for 500 years.
Me: It'd be so awesome...
Job requirement: 100 year of JavaScript experience for junior dev.
omg....XD -
So the next O’rly book I can imagine for this project is:
How did I ended in this microservices nightmare?2 -
Old but gold.
True Story, and they named another child: "help I'm stuck in a car license factory" imagine that license
1 -
Fuck me Doom: Eternal is brilliant. People said what they liked and disliked about Doom 2016 and they just listened. Imagine that!9
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int someFunc()
{
int result = -1;
// imagine all the fucking ifs in the world...
{
{
{
{
{
{
{
{
{
}
}
}
}
}
}
}
}
}
return result;
}4 -
My boss seems to have developed a super power where he can imagine features into existence.
I should investigate... -
So... do you actually talk to a dev duck like you would to a normal person, or do you just imagine talking to it?8
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Mac’s window management is so fucking shit compared to Windows.
Imagine how shit something would be if it’s shitter than Windows’ shit.9 -
Imagine accidentally deleting the entire production database today and people thought you were joking.
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Dude imagine being born in 12/3/4567.
Writing birth date fast af.
You could even slide your finger as a pianist.11 -
Imagine working with some pronouncing git as jit but you don’t care about correcting him so pain continues, endlessly.11
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When I see bullshit mostly about tech-related stuff, I usually imagine myself doing this. It makes me happy and in some situations almost tolerant to idiotism.
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Imagine calling a programming language “cancer” because there are a few things you don’t like about it.15
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Seriously, fuck sports fans. Imagine having to relate every conceivable concept through a scenario in sport to understand it.
"How does that work?"
"Okay, so imagine you've got this team, right..."2 -
Sometimes I get bored and fix people's shitty code on stack overflow for fun
It's actually entertaining...
But as infuriating as you'd imagine4 -
Imagine having a font where two DIFFERENT letters look the SAME
IlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlI5 -
It is really really really hard to do anything, including development or studying, when you're worrying about losing your teeth.
You can't imagine the anxiety.11 -
Always thought windows source code would be the most untidy and disgusting code i could imagine but then I realised world of warcraft existed... Just imagine how horrible that shit would be!1
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If there's any page on a website that DESPERATELY needs a WebVR interface, it's the Privacy Policy. Imagine navigating in 3D to section 8.2
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To make all those "You know how to code right? So i have this app idea. Imagine Facebook BUT for ____" i get requested.2
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I can't imagine programming before web browsers had tabs. I don't think I could live in such a dark, twisted, masochistic world.3
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IMAGINE. Your code is working in the 1st attempt.
Wow, Amazing, Cool
Now go back to first word.......👀👀😑😑😑😑😑1 -
!rant
Do you think you are adventurous? We do stuff most people could never imagine.
I wanna drip hot wax on a naked lady...17 -
Anybody having trouble with work VPNs during the health crisis? I can't imagine most have ever had this kind of test before.3
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imagine, you are Stack overflow. You are down. How should you now solve your issues, when you cannot search Stack overflow? *mind blowing* *World exploding*
3 -
Artists complaining about the use of AI pictures is totally fine apparently, and politically correct.
Imagine if programmers complained about low-code/no-code tools. 💀8 -
Imagine requesting something from a girl/boy you're interested in, and getting replies in Http codes...
What are the funniest?
402: Payment required
403: Forbidden15 -
I imagine if every girl was to ask for my S.O point count before dating me then I would die single...1
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Starting off, I believed that the "sudo" is some magic God that can fix all my problems with Linux.
Imagine that!11 -
The best invention of all time is copy and paste. Can you imagine without copy and paste in your machine/devices? I don't think so...
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Me at interview ->
Imagine the frustration you may go writing code in a different platform not having your vimrc. Than imagine the suicidal thoughts you have after you finish your program and have tabs mixed with spaces and indent errors, well on top of that imagine losing all the code highlighting all the code using X to yank it and P to paste in another file
Well, i shut down the vim session and lost all the code i wrote in 2 hrs3 -
Imagine an annual $50k+ enterprise software package that didn't distinguish between a null and an empty string in valuing critical data. Not noticed for years - wtf?3
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My google search history:
tide rust
diesel tide
tide with diesel rust
You can imagine the results.4 -
Imagine you're in a world where everybody suddenly vanishes when you wake up what do you do with your time and where would you go31
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This is not why I go to r/CozyPlaces AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA[and now imagine 4830 more A's]
6 -
imagine thinking the future of llms / ai lies with yet another garbage python tool
😂😂😂😂
reality truly is stranger than fiction
🤡🤡🤡🤡6 -
Got through 4 hours of merge conflicts before pushing to prod... I imagine this is how doctors feel during an operation... #ef
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Ok I can imagine that being premium uses more ram cuz the offline content won't be handled magically.
But still... I don't like how it looks like 🤣
1 -
Not so much of a "tool" but as someone with a small monitor, I can't imagine my life without workspace in linux and/or virtual desktop on win 10
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Imagine 100 years from now, what would programming be like?
My answer :
Speaking the commands directly to the computer and hope it runs
Your answer?9 -
Imagine if socket.io's website is ugly. Having a beautiful image helps a lot, too. When I hear socket.io, I would immediately think of that clean and aesthetically pleasing site.5
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my workstation, can't imagine to work without it,
waiting for dev rant stickers even left some space for them
Proudly running Ubuntu Gnome 16.04
3 -
This rant is tribute to the guy who doesn't allow you to login to site before authorization..
the level of security one can never imagine 😂 -
Challenge to the internet:
Make the worst volume control you can imagine.
The internet respond, and some are epic level bad:
https://imgur.com/gallery/XOT471 -
Someone has to start manufacturing quality HUD glasses...
Imagine the possibilities and comfort...
no more neckpain from crouching above your laptop/tablet/smartphone, imagine the navigation systems, imagine you could read messages, articles, code, watch videos whatever you are doing, even work on your code with some kind of keyboard (or with speech recognition)
I want this soo bad..3 -
Imagine writing CSS in JS like some barbaric viking.
*This post was made by CSS in its own file gang1 -
Just finished the first week of my internship in the fucking best software company you’d imagine. Wow, these companies really exists...3
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linus torvalds has complete power over linux. huh.
that means that he's likely to include linux in his will.
could you imagine inheriting linux?12 -
I don’t see my myself ever becoming a team lead or PM because I fucking hate meetings. Imagine spending the whole working hours attending meetings! Jesus Fucking Christ!4
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import classNames from "classnames";
imagine installing, importing, and using a package that is solved quite literally by built in parts of the language
yawn
i grow weary7 -
Wiriting documentation is the single most boring thing I can imagine.
Fuck, it'd be more entertaining watching paint dry, or seeing the grass grow.6 -
Imagine living in fucking 2021 and still be writing unit tests. If genius can generate gravity, with those stupid people I bet antigravity exists lmao25
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AccuRev. Imagine version control software written by someone who read about the concept in a book once and who also never heard of UX.
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Imagine both having the build step AND not having a strong and reliable type system. What have we got ourselves into? Truly an asylum run by its inmates.9
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Imagine what will happen to Devrant if there is a live stream functionality for ranting.... I mean just imagine....😂😂😂 How many times of the word f*** will be in one live stream...6
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All the knowledge about every language in existence.
Just imagine never having your questions downvoted on SO because you never have to ask questions anymore <310 -
I just noticed Facebook's research website (research.fb.com) is based on WP.
Now i can only imagine their technology stack as NKjnwkjecweccnUJb8iuwdjeninwcjw8jiwcenciciUIUC98ICjiCe(CJeicnI*Cncowkch9ECnjckcowcewcNJKjccjkcbccjkwcjckwecjwecnwe##!!@dcwe1 -
If your day is bad, imagine that, in an alternate dystopian universe, everyone and their mother are programming through the means of bodyfuck (real thing, look it up)..
-
Imagine the conversation with guests if you would have SSID: NotGonnaTellYou and Passphrase: DefinitelyNotGonnaTellYou#&€+'-€∆¶×✓®©✓~π|×¢✓. Fact: you can't, illegal characters in the passphrase. Duh.
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Imagine an entire operating system dedicated to running a web browser and only 1 web browser 10 years ago it would have been thought of as insanity2
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Am I the only one who hates it with his guts that most Active Record implementations infer fields from the db?
Which motherf*cker thought it'd be fun to imagine the model through several migrations, or to imagine the data types in the languague itself when looking at the database?
Let me write the model and infer the f*cking changes to create migrations, not the other way around. -
Imagine applying a drop shadow to a button, and suddenly it's carving a hole through your website.
CSS doesn't suck, you're just bad at it!
4 -
write comment about posters preference of device or OS.
close eyes and imagine the meaningless flame war that would follow.
delete comment.
feel good about choice.
good for me. -
So you know camelCase. Today I learnt there is a StUdLyCaPs e.g. "tHeqUicKBrOWnFoXJUmpsoVeRThElAzydOG" Imagine that in a codebase.2
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As students, imagine if we had to reference StackOverflow every time we used it to solve our problems...3
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Imagine a playlist where each ranter gets to pick one song they like to listen to while programming.4
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Imagine an alternate universe where websites are actually just raw markup and style sheets.
People read this and imagine what the website look like.5 -
Spent an entire workday yesterday getting a project out of (unnecessary) dependency hell. Today it's actually still working. Imagine that.1
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Imagination time.
With all our tech achievements, ai, ml, chatgpt, etc... Do you thing a completely automated future is possible? Automated agriculture, industry, healthcare,... Do you think we will still have finances/currency of any kind? If so - why? And how would we earn them if labour is no longer required [apart from ai/ml engineers]?
Do you ever imagine humanity ever reaching this fully robots-based future?11 -
https://youtu.be/7gvmzWPUHmY
All these things work so well
Why is anyone doing poorly anywhere ?
Could you imagine if we had to do this all by hand ??8 -
Github Down - This is just another rant about Github being down.
[Imagine Github's Rainbow Unicorn Here] -
every time a popup window pops out above another popup i imagine a little innocent bunny massacred by some wicked PM
-
Imagine vying for the same role with someone who has ex-Twitter/ex-Stripe attached to their bio.
Sick1 -
imagine the guys in the datacenter are switching out power distribution units - and suddenly your productive database cluster reboots :)1
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Well let's see here, I imagine that there would be different models of AI's by different companies ... Easy ... I would become an AI reviewer on youtube, and since AI's are such an integral part of daily activities, i imagine i will have a pretty good subscriber base, enough to sustain my needs !!!
-
Imagine enabling verbose logging for a complex ETL process that typically takes 8 hours to run but has been failing for some reason after running for about 7 hours. Naturally, you want to check the log file to find out what went wrong.
Now imagine not having read access to the log file. -
Imagine if all countries made it mandatory for their citizens to have the same haircut as their leader..2
-
Imagine if all the laws was based solely on concepts.
Like imagine being detained for not matching your archetype lol1 -
Imagine being on holidays on monday like some elitist pleb.
* This post was sponsored by "First day back" gang 😒 -
If you want a picture of the future, imagine a boot, treading more lightly on a human face, forever.1
-
I imagine being a schizophrenic developer must be entertaining, like imagine you're fixing a bug and your homie comes up with a genius suggestion, I mean, more minds help resolve problems faster.4
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Can you imagine this scary moment while resolving conflict after a pull request that might break your code ?
That's the scariest moment1 -
Imagine you have a dream about dreaming about unfinished code that triggers recursion, because it is unfinished and that is why you are dreaming about it.
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zzazzdzz/fools2019 starts tomorrow.
too bad i have
s c h o o l
(join us if you wanna learn GBz80ASM and partake in challenges every year. also plugging glitchcity.info here too because our member does it and we collab on it)3 -
I could write a fucking dissertation on why snek is objectively a piece of shit, together with all your favorite dumbass collections of syntactic diarrhea full of needless operators and toothless fucking conventions that make no sense in retrospect.
By that I mean to say among all of it's real world uses the foremost is screwing yourself, which is analogous to utilizing the fine hands of a classically trained violinist for virtuous masturbation. And you cannot fix it, you can only Keep It Solemnly Sucking.
Now I'm not saying that if they were humans their lot in life would be to get down on their knees and passionately blow me until my eyes pop out. All I'm saying is their lot in life IS to get DOWN and passionately BLOW me until my eyes pop out, to which the general scientific consensus is indeed yes, it is, and they absolutely should.
But back to commanding the demons trapped inside the sillicon and all the existing ways to to do so being terrible half-assed abortions that serve as a perfect encapsulation and prime example of mankind's greatest shame and failures. If I had to volcanically ejaculate for each time I heard a thorough and perfectly valid critique of insert flavor of fucking stupid, I'd be long-rotting dead from dehydration.
You think that's funny? A man just died creaming in his pants and we are all wiser for it, show some respect. Some people simply do not understand the value of humility, and I will be *proud* to anally humble them for it, free of charge.
Anytime, I swear, ANYTIME that I come back to a language I fucking hate and I'm immediately reminded of why I do everything in my power to avoid it, I invariably come out with the feeling that it wasn't quite as bad as the last time.
THAT is how I measure my progress: still swimming in a sea of deeply decolored and fermenting alien reptile excretion -- but I'm a much better swimmer. This isn't so bad, I may even ignore the burning desire to kill myself next time.
But I'm so blinded by your plump fucking tits that I can't even remember what was my point, I may have just delivered the verbal equivalent of complete mental castration. Again.15 -
Just imagine Alexa, Google Assistant, Siri, and Cortana talking to each other. What will they talk about? and How good the conversation would be?5
-
Imagine you're on fire continuously running past a pit of scorpions. Being pressured kind of feels like this anyway.6
-
Imagine you just started learning to coding how would you learn ......
What will you learn......
What are the advise you'll give yourself......6 -
imagine you "manage" your applications firewall rules by writing them into spreadsheets and sending them to the fw-admins to implement them
imagine they don't implement exactly what you tell them / implement rules for you that you did not ask for
also imagine it is crucial that you have a reliable source of information about what firewall rules are and are not implemented for your application, because the firewall-guys cant simply check and tell you what rules are implemented for your application
:o2
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