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Me : So how's the deadlines here?
Coworker : There are none.
Me : ?
Coworker : if they are unrealistic, we push non-working code. Prod comes up with bugs, and we get a new sprint to resolve those bugs.
Me: ╰[ ⁰﹏⁰ ]╯10 -
Manager: I need estimates for your sprint tasks
Me: I've never done any of this before, my estimates have no context and are effectively worthless
Manager: don't worry it's just for the Jira board.
Me: OK *gives estimates*
End of sprint comes...
Manager: Why isn't task X done?
Me: *sigh*
I don't miss my old job :)
3 -
PM : Have you finished the login issues?
Me, junior dev: No mister.
PM: Why not? You're going to delay the sprint.
Me: The other PM told me not to do it.
When you're the only dev in a project with two managers, life suddenly feels like you're back to 5 years old with your parents arguing all the time.6 -
My co-worker convinced me to post my setup up since this is what I'm using when I work from home, or go on a sprint. I'm way more productive here than the office! Maybe they shpuld just let me work from home indefinitely 😎
I like to think of this as my happy place :)
9 -
A week in code:
Mon: Write all the code💻
Tue: Review all the code🔍
Wen: Fix all the broken code🔴
Thurs: Deploy🚢
Fri: Review all the code🔬4 -
Hey, remember that one feature that really needed to be in the release and you spend almost a week non stop at the office? Nobody is using it, we're gonna remove it this sprint.1
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Some words of wisdom passed on by our Scrum.
1. I am responsible for setting boundaries. Work time, sleep time, family time, me time. If I don't set them properly, things WILL get unbalanced very quickly. (And I would add, burnout will follow closely).
2. Being productive isn't about doing more and more in less time. It's about doing only the most important things well, and either saying no to the other things, or finding another way to get them done. (Prioritize!)
3. I can't win (let alone run) a marathon by thinking of it as a 26 mile long sprint, or a week as a five day sprint. (Eat a digital elephant a byte at a time).
4. Loved ones are good judges of when things are in and out of balance.
5. Taking time off is essential. Vacations, yes, but also nights and weekends. (Or you WILL burn out and hate what you do).
Comments in () are mine.1 -
Agile in practice.
I finished my story with 3 days left in our 2 week sprint.
Me: What story should I pull in next?
PM: Story <number> to add <new feature>
Me: ok, sounds good
PM: Will you finish it before our sprint ends?
Me: No, probably will take me 5-7 days.
PM: But it can't spill over, it will make our metrics look bad.
Me: I can't finish it in 3 days.
PM: ....
Me: Can't you just explain the spillover as us working ahead?
PM: It will look bad on our <automated-report>
Me: ....
Me: So don't want me to get started on <new feature>?
PM: ....
Me: <internally sighing> What do you want me to do?
PM: Maybe you can pair program with <Overpaid-Idiot-Programmer> to help finish their story
Me: ....
Me: feelsbadman.jpg15 -
Today:
9 am - 2:30 pm - customer mtng
2:45 pm - 3:25 pm - team mtng
3:30 pm - 5 pm - sprint planning mtng
Anyone ever literally be in a meeting the WHOLE day? ... 😢 🔫11 -
#workingfromhomeissues
Tomorrow is our half day long sprint planning meeting. I'm excited to be on mute and play with my new puppy all day.
1 -
One of our dev teams has a tradition: after each post-sprint review one of the devs tells a wood joke. The lamer, the better.
So far the winner is:
Q: What did Batman say to Robin before Robin got in the car?
A: Robin, get in the car
It's so dumb it's actually somehow even funny :)31 -
Alright I get the importance of project planning but having a Sprint meeting at 7am is just insane.1
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Boss: we follow scrum here
Me: yeah, tell that to those shitheads who call themselves "product managers" and throw whatever features they want at us at the middle of the sprint with a fixed deadline, not regarding the team capacity.2 -
When your co-worker of 2 years forgets to sweeten your tea.. (on the last day of a sprint no less)
where my fellow while(tea > 0){write(code)} peeps at
25 -
Pro tip to scrum masters: bringing a scrum suitcase to your sprint meetings is more useful than bringing scrumbags.
1 -
STOP. LOOKING. AT. HALF. FINISHED. SPRINTS. FOR. STYLING. ERRORS.
For the love of god I know it's not right yet leave me aloooooone7 -
Soooo it's the first day of sprint. I have tasks A, B and C.
Here's my manager again telling me:
"It's just A ,why are you taking time."
"It's just B ,why are you taking time."
"It's just C ,why are you taking time."2 -
12 days of work, 12 fucking days straight and I meet the Friday deadline for this ridiculous sprint of never ending tasks.
There’s no better feeling then bringing everything together at 5pm on Friday, pushing to Git and waking out that door knowing there’s nothing more to do until Monday’s testing!!!!
Now excuse me while I go sleep my weekend away!2 -
1. Pre-sales to Client: We can develop 200 APIs with 10 developers in 9 months.
2. Client: Ok! Cool, its a deal.
-- Sprint starts --
3. Actual: We are 6 developers, commited (or sold out) to make 200 APIs in 9 months.
Fucking pre-sales.3 -
Sprint planning meeting, two hours trying to plan what to do with a new feature we wanted to add to one of our systems.
The boss gets out of the meeting room to get a phone number to make a call (we needed to ask something to one of our clients).
5 minutes later, the boss comes back and saw that the lead dev was going to his own desk.
Boss: Where do you think you’re going?
Lead dev: I’m bored :v
😂😂😂😂😂7 -
Desktop SSD just failed. All VMs lost. Domain admins too drunk to fix. No timesheets no sprint diary no mail no IM.6
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This month is going pretty well so far..
New job: ☑️
Get out of FinTech: ☑️
New place: ☑️
Get rid of car #1: ☑️
Get rid of car #2: ☑️
Pay a shit lot of taxes: ☑️
Still have some money to on the side: ☑️
Book flight&car: ⬜️
Register in new country: ⬜️
And still 2 weeks to go.
Holidays are coming though..
I actually did a sticky label agile board for this 😄9 -
Me when I fuck up my sleep schedule badly by turning my life into a coding sprint and then trying to go normal
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My team are so needy and incapable of figuring anything out independently that I've basically not got any of my sprint tasks done so far. So today I told them that I was working from home for a day to actually get done work done, but I'm on Slack if they really need me.
The only observable difference now is that instead of just bugging me, they start every conversation with, "sorry, I know you're busy, but..."3 -
my boss asked me to join a xamarin project, there are 45 bugs on current sprint. the first thing i saw is this code, no wonder there are so many bugs 😭
5 -
When you’re way more experienced and new to a team and are met with “but this is how we’ve done it for ages, and it’s done fine for us” but the sprint performance shows they’ve not completed one in 2 years.
5 -
A new producer started to pick up where the previous guy had rage quit. He looked at our sprint plan and announced it.
"According to this schedule, by these estimates, to hit our goal we have to somehow all work 27 hours a day, 7 days a week, for the next month."2 -
"I want visibility in the sprint", "Information for everyone! When you do even a small refactoring, you should add a card to the sprint, clear?"
Those were the words of the product manager.
That sounds reasonable but when there is a bug to investigate, he just pops to the chat channel throw a request with a bit of information and asks to check/fix that.
So to keep my sanity, I asked him to create a ticket with relevant information and additional observations so we can have visibility as he was advocating for it ;)
It felt just good to see him going silent :D4 -
Client: we are using Scrum. Next week we have sprint review organized by the project manager.
Me: it’s not Scrum.
Client: in the next sprint we work on a mockup not releasable in production.
Me: it’s not Scrum.
Client: sprint backlog is changed again, at the end we must do everything that is written in the contract with that fixed amount of money.
Me: definitely not Scrum.
Client: we are using Scrum.
Me: Ok.1 -
I finished a story of my sprint in VueJS, which is new to me, with occasional help from colleague A. I put it through to code review, and colleague B refuses to approve it before I rebuild half the codebase of my story to improve it. In a framework I am still very much learning. The sprint ends in two days. There isn't enough coffee for this. Fml. Help.9
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I start to grasp why sprints are called the way they are. tomorrow is the last day of my first one and I'm fucking exhausted.8
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From a buddy:
A friend's comment on the latest merge conflict on the integration branch:
"O brachName! my branchName! our fearful sprint is done,
The build has failed with every merge, the goal we sought not won,
The release is near, the worst I fear, would Product be exulting?" -
Every sprint, the beast grows.
Every sprint, we'll sort it "later".
Every sprint, we suffer more.
We warned them, but they did not listen. The technical debt rapture has begun.
-
I don't know what's wrong with my job..
-I am an opensource developer
-But my colleagues ask for ITIS issues
-My manager asks to interview 20 people in 2 hrs
- asks to prepare a KT schedule.
-Asks to attend few meetings
- And asks the status of the sprint task everyday
Typical managers 😣1 -
Company: Okay lets do Agile on this project! And every sprint is equivalent to 3 weeks!
Us: Wow! That's nice!
Company: We need to finish the project with in one month.
Us: Wait. What??!!!!3 -
Preparing to debug racing condition between 20 different threads.
Not looking forward to this sprint :(5 -
So there's a new team member in the project (me & him), he's assigned to make the frontend, which is great since I'm so proficient doing back. But he starts by doing backend tasks and the fucking frontend which is the most delayed part of the project is still untouched.2
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I’ll quit swearing when you stop moving user-stories in and out of the sprint DURING THE FUCKING SPRINT.7
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This week's sprint:
Bugs that cannot be reproduced
Features that are vague as shit
Man fuck this week...1 -
A delicious Sprint Planning 😋
It was a hard sprint (SCRUM methodology), but finally we were on our next’s sprint planning meeting. We had a lot of tasks to define and estimate. For the first one, we all estimated the task with 5 points, and for the second one we voted for 3 points. We were coordinated XD so, our boss said “let’s do something, if all of you vote, let’s say, 5, and another votes for a different number, he or she’s gonna buy us a six pack of beer”. Challenge accepted.
Two partners and I have to buy beers for this friday after work 😂 I don’t even mad 😋🍻
3 -
Before starting sprint we gave estimations, while discuss with my team, my project manager also part of the meeting. After three weeks my project manager start give list of tasks like this is API and this is front end and also estimations based on our previous sprint plan.
We pissed off. After that we never include our manager in technical meeting.
FYI - If you're using Google sheets for ball park estimations never give permission to your project manager to edit sheet.2 -
It's sprint meeting day! Time to grab some coffee because it's going to be 5 hours of PMs ranting about tickets and progress. Yay!
-
Each sprint lasts for 2 weeks. But I get the basic info to start working on my stories only when 3/4th of the sprint is completed....
So yeah....no one gives shit about estimation at least in my case.6 -
Gotta love product owners that don't seem to understand agile.
We delivered the set number of items in the sprint we committed to plus a little extra polish. During the last day of the sprint we're spending the time to push all our work to UAT do he can actually perform acceptance testing...
He decides he should chase all of us up on stuff that we never commited to or even mentioned we'd touch.
Had to explain it to him at least 5 times during the day.5 -
*in Sprint planning listening to my PM creating tasks*
PM (to Team): So this will be an MVP we can expand on in the future. Do let me know upfront if any tasks should not be in the Sprint.
Team Manager (to PM): Let's see... Yeah I think you've nailed it... Good.
Developer (to Team): Guys, I see the task for the frontend team to integrate machine learning doesn't have any details.
PM (to Developer): Ooh machine learning! Good catch!
PM (to Team Manager): This was one of the tasks we really needed this quarter, will we still be on track?
Team Manager (to PM): Yeah no worries we'll add it as part of the MVP design in Confluence.
PM: Okay assigning the task now. *Assigns to Developer*
*Team Manager goes on 1 month vacation*
Me (thinking to myself): Wtf3 -
When your sprint review is turned into a 5 hour argument about how to effectively do scrum and all you want to do is code.1
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I bought a new carbon fiber bike (I am into cycling the last two years) and it is fantastic. Lightweight, it feels responsive as hell and really easy to sprint on. BUT, I am fucking sick and I can't ride it to train... All I can do for now is looking at it. FML.8
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The sprint tasks are finished a week early. Spent half day sitting in my office and squeezing the stress ball.
Looking forward to get some more task tomorrow1 -
First month of project we suggest that we test that Entity Framework has made reasonable DB queries because the system will need to handle a lot of records. “Not a priority in this sprint because we need features.” Devs try to get it into every sprint. The last week of the project they want us to dump in a ton of records so they can test it. The N+1 SELECT query issue is on main queries. It is so bad and slow with more records that a simple query causes the container management to auto scale the application on a single query. They can have max 8 users in the system at a time and it will take 10 seconds to do a simple page refresh.
They get on our case and we dredge up all of the correspondence where they completely ignored our advice. Fix it now! We need another sprint. Fix it free! No.11 -
The whole point of having a daily scrum is to let your team know about the progress you've made from last day and what you'd be needing to stick to the sprint plan.
So ideally everyone has 30-60 seconds to give a gist of their activities. And a small scrum team would be productive because everybody is on the same page.
Our scrum meetings usually wait for all of us to assemble with our coffees and donuts, sit down, joke, and then agonizingly go over everybody's existential crisis as a developer because of the task they've been assigned to has too many dependencies. And this happens every single fucking day! These "scrum" meetings tend to go for 1 hour. FML!5 -
"If we need to deprioritize something that's fine, as long as it all still gets done by the time we agreed on."
Gotta love product management types.4 -
When the PO asks for a last second code change right before the sprint review, and now it's your turn to demo
2 -
When an application has tons of security holes and fixes never make it into sprint prioritization because "they're not new features"4
-
Sprint planning:
PO: I have a great idea for a new game changing feature
Team: cool, let’s talk requirements, etc
PO: nah, I trust you can come up with the best implementation possible
Sprint demo:
Team: presents the feature
PO: Why are you guys always doing it your way, instead of following my vision?!
Every single sprint...3 -
Part? The whole damn thing.
We are supposed to be practicing agile, but I haven't seen a single sprint plan till date. All we do is solve issues that are reported from production/QA.
Nobody follows proper documentation, no reviews, no proper version control... Can't wait to finish my contract here and get the hell out.1 -
One week into my new job as a junior mobile developer I receive my stickers from devrant (for posts I made while still a project manager and self-studying to get where I am now) - on the same day I did my first 12hr workday to complete work for my first sprint.
1 -
Twitter app update: Home/Search/Notifications/Messages buttons jump from the top of the screen to the bottom. What a productive sprint this must have been at Twitter.6
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Rant time of 'Derp & Co.'
Today I decided that I am going to find another job, I just can't keep with this shit.
They said that use Agile: FALSE.
• Daily (best scenario) take like 1 hour and a half.
• New task enter the sprint and "Fuck you, more task in the same time". This is something regular done.
• "Oh, dev, we need you to check this other project" I am in the middle of my sprint on this project. "But you have to fix this bug here". (3 fucking days the bloody bug) "You are late again with tasks".
• Meeting for fresh sprint: 6 BLOODY hours... nonstop
The workflow is garbage:
• SOMEONE should did all the devops shit on the first sprint, guess what? They did nothing!, guess now who is being blamed for it (not only me, but a few coworkers).
• Nothing is well designed/defined:
~ task are explained like shit
~ times measured wrongly
~ We are in the last fucking SPRINT and still doing de ER of the DataBase cause Oh, apparently no one has work before with SQL (damn you MongoDB! (Not really)) so I am doing my best, but "jezz dev, this is so hard... maybe we can do it WRONG and easy".
~ No one is capable of take responsability of their mess, they just try to push down the problems. (Remember the devops situatuion? Why is.my fault? I came at the 3 or 4 sprint and I am doing backend tasks, I know nothing about devops).
But the big prize, the last one:
• Apparently you can't send whatever you want to the boss, it has to pass a filter previously of coordinators and managers, hell yeah!
And I am an idiot too!
because I see that we can't reach our schedule and do hours on my spare time!
This is because there are a few good coworkers who probably ended with my unfinished tasks... and they are equaly fucked as me...
This is just the tip of the iceberg. I am not a pro, I am not a full stack developer and still need to learn a lot, but this is just not normal, eight months like this...3 -
After the end of Sprint, well, the QA people came up with this defect ( mind it 'defect' ) : "The exclamation mark is not very red" [ sic ]
Cancer died a death that moment. -
During our last Sprint Planning we have chosen to use internal codename Solid Snake for this period (yes, we change it every sprint).
Our Tech Lead likes to draw current name (adjective and animal name) on a whiteboard. As soon as new name has been voted down he refused to draw a new one because
Drum rolls
He doesn't like Metal Gear series.
I'm not sure I want to work in this company anymore...5 -
When the PM schedules you for 160 hours in an 80 hour sprint... I didn't enjoy living my life anyways, apparently. FMDL.3
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Funny story:
We were going through Sprint Planning on Monday. We got through all of the tasks that we knew we had to get done, then we started going through the backlog to see what we could pull forward.
The guy running the meeting (who's not actually a Scrum master, but whatever) get's to a task, reads it aloud, and goes, "That doesn't ring any bells. Brian, it's in your name, it says it's from May, do you know what the status of this is?
Brian reads through it for about 20 seconds before saying, "That date says it's from 2017. I don't think we need it anymore."2 -
So I finished all my tasks for the sprint (3-weeks long) in the first 2 days.
Shit that happens when senior team members underestimate your abilities...4 -
No matter how much I try my boss keeps trying to shove future or unsolicited features on every fucking current sprint as if we weren't delayed already...
Wtf dude? We get paid by delivery, let's just fucking deliver what they expect by each deadline and move on...5 -
Sprint for a website due Monday, would of been nice to get the website designs before Wednesday :/ and the content before yesterday.....2
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Today is release day...big sprint (complete UI redesign) ... Already 1 and half month late ... fingers crossed (specially for in house clients)3
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I really want to stress that we should add the ticket for adding the missing test cases in *this* sprint and not postpone it any further.
-- "Isn't there something more important to be added instead?"
There. ALWAYS. Is. Something. MORE. Important. The real problem was that we implement the test cases in the past to begin violating our definition of done. We have to fix and one point and we have to own that decision as nobody else will care about passing tests and test coverage. It's our job to care for that.
Yes, we can instead focus on all the other high-priorities task that should have been done yesterday, yet that won't change the fact that large part our codebase will remain an untested messy blackbox just asking for weird bugs and wild goosechases in the future.
Don't hide behind "high priority tasks". A job is done when it is fucking done and tests are part of that. Hurrying from one important task to the next will just mean we'll never do it. There is no better time than right now.
If code coverage got left behind in the past, then we'll have to suck it up in order to fix it as soon as possible, otherwise we'll just suck forever.1 -
Happened in December, had devs from "big" companies coming over to our start up and doing a sprint with us. Very humbling 🙂2
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Well, fuck.
Currently I feel like the personification of the term "thrown into cold water"
After I finished my bachelors degree, I started working on first of april. The first full-time job I had. Therefore I had some training in the first 2 weeks and after that I joined a project after easter. Fast forward two sprints:
Currently I am the only dev in that project, tomorrow is sprint review with the clients and I have to present like 5 tickets of the 10 planned for this sprint. Of my 8 working hours a day, 4 are planned for my self-training and 4 for tickets. Actually its more like 6 for training/reading/understanding the code, because its mostly a whole CRM I am supposed to develop... PM said another dev will join the project in one or two weeks. I hope the client didn't slay me till then..2 -
So we have a long weekend here (4 days) due to a national holiday, and I already spend 2.5/4 days coding for work, doing tasks for a sprint that didn't even start yet, just so when I go back to work, I can feel like I do nothing and still earn money1
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You know what's fun? When your client insists you use an agile process with a delivery at the end of each sprint, then proceeds to bitch at each release at the features that weren't implemented yet. The thing isn't even slated to be done until 4Q 2018 and is on schedule/early. Glad I am not on that team . . . yet.
-
Today at 'Derp & Co' is the end of the last sprint, no one have close all the task asigned. Myself included.
- that sucks...
Because there are task from previos sprints still in TODO that block other tasks.
- oof
But there is more... Yesterday was the deadline of the project. From today and onwards the client get discount.
- oof (but fair to the client)
Management have in mind AT LEAST 4 more weeks of development.
- But... how... wtf?
In 2 weeks part of the hardware we need for the project will return to the client.
- <smash the door and leave>
Management still is asking if we can do it on time...
- yeah... just call the Doctor, we need a TARDIS ASAP2 -
Quiet working environment (aside from hearing a joke from time to time)
Fast computer, lots of screens, keyboard and mouse of my choice
Good product owner that doesn't accept bullshit request into the sprint
No legacy crap5 -
As I am now in a leading position in the middle of a agile transition:
has anyone got a source for a project done completely with user stories?
I am searching a real life example with already finished stories an active backlog and a documentation.
I just can't wrap my head around it. When and what do you document? In which Form do you document? How are you writing user stories with more content like diagrams and such?
(we use jira and confluence but just started with stories)
I read some articles on the topic and watched some talks but sill don't get the picture.8 -
That moment when agile means "I will sneak in new feature requirements in with your bug tickets even though our sprint is supposed to be only stabilization". Thanks PM Lord.
-
my ex-boss in our Sprint -Meeting: Last Sprint we finished X-Points, well then this Sprint we should add X+100 points.
Next meeting he would rate a 1 in happyness because we didnt finish in time1 -
Boss: here you go 3 tasks for your sprint
Days later with local server and db still not connecting on docker.
Boss: ya can we add a task on jira and get that fixed as soon as possible and see why its not working(feature doesnt work)
Me: you got it boss.
Me(in head): How am i ever going to finish my sprint for next Friday...8 -
I love adding documentation in a sprint and then it prevents us from releasing a product because someone did not finish the story. *doing Agile wrong*
-
Don't forget to give the developers the opportunity to innovate. Nobody wants to sit and type out the same structures day after day. That's not why we got into this job. We like solving problems. In my current team we set aside some time every sprint to spend on individual innovation. Super useful as it gives us the chance to break out from the standard chugging of the backlog and spend some time trying to solve some of the trickier problems and bringing improvements back to the product that we discovered by messing around with stuff. If you are reading this and you are in charge of a development team, try this out for a sprint or 2.2
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So my colleague sees an iPad on a desk that someone has left by accident. He puts in the wrong password a bunch of times to lock it for an hour as a joke and accidentally wipes it!! Turns out it was about to be used for end of sprint client demo 😂2
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Don't check in a major/ groundbreaking change a day or two before sprint demo! However confident you are about your code just postpone it until after all sprint demos 😷
-
The worst part about owning a non Nexus Android phone is the long wait for the next version of Android. I want 7.0 but I'm not even sure if my s7 edge on Sprint will get it before the year is over
9 -
In my last sprint planning my Project Manager said: "...Drupal is a programming language, like swift or jquery.."
And my boss wonders why our plannings take so long.
😳🤔😭😭😭😭😭3 -
I just got an email from the project manager:
"Hi Team,
Please make sure to review the 7/12 sprint requests for (x project). Please add your estimates even if the requirements are ambiguous. Thank you."3 -
When you're at the end of a sprint, implemented a cool new feature and only the garbage issues are left over -.-
-
I've been a "firefighter" on our big money-making project for like a year now and probably will be for the next year. Every sprint, fully booked out.
However, this sprint, some people think I have time to brainstorm, learn new tech and attend meetings related to a completely new project.
"Will it done in 2 weeks?"
"How long do you estimate?"
I can knock up a rough version of your fucking application in about a week if someone grows some fucking balls and schedules me some fucking time for it. STFU and stop interrupting my other work. Allocate some time or shove it up your ass so far until you regurgitate it then swallow it again and choke on it. -
I get to learn so many different things in DevRant, that I want to add it as my task in the Sprint Board
-
20 issues assigned to me this sprint with very vague titles and in the requirements it says "See *person name* for details"
Lesson learned: Never go on vacation during the spring planning meeting.3 -
I fucking hate 1 week sprints that include review, planning, and retrospective, so technically the sprint is 4 days.1
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MEETINGS
Daily stand up
Weekly status
Fortnightly update
Monthly planning
Life would be so much simpler without meetings. Just chat, why fuss over "meeting"?
As it is most of the things don't go as per what's planned in the monthly planning meeting.
Neither is there much of an update in the fortnightly update meeting. Only update is what we planned, isn't the right direction.
This will obviously screw up the weekly status. Screwed up planning is dishevelled implementation.
Daily stand up is just very sleep deprived developers, who don't wanna talk.
Make it my time's worth; say no more meetings. -
As both a developer and consumer of a cellular phone service, the latest Sprint slogan "works for me" is unintentionally hilarious.
-
When your IT department needs to make a DNS entry for you and it's been blocking your sprint for 9 days.1
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Ah yes i also love not having a meeting before our first sprint because 'there is nothing to talk about yet'. I see absolutely no way this could ever go wrong.1
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Our "boss" asked us to go to office on Saturday to work on something that is not part of the current sprint, but planned to be done next sprint, because we are
A g i l e10 -
rant
When you come 1000kms away from office to home.. and promise to do WFH and the wifi at home is slow...
Killing me!!
Too many backlogs this sprint... -
Definitely the meetings. Not sure if the "Meeting to prepare for the Sprint Planning" or the "Planning meeting to prepare for the Meeting to prepare for Sprint Planning".
I know it sounds like I'm joking, but it actually happened 2 months ago.1 -
A whole bunch of new features were added mid-sprint without ever consulting any of the development team. They dogpiled on devs from other projects who had no prior experience with the code base, so naturally I lose traction because I'm tied up answering questions and explaining things.
This sprint I'm not getting any feature work done as I'm stuck fixing bugs and awful half-ass implementations (by well meaning devs that were thrown at unrealistic expectations).
Concerned at the burn down rate, next week they're planning on dogpiling on more guys to play catch up.
I'm so sad -
When you have assigned stories that are blocked by other dependencies being developed in the same Sprint... Oh boy, someone is not going to finish on time u.u
-
Switching to a new server provider the day before a sprint and thinking that turning it on qualifies as the server being "set up".
-
> client has no infrastructure of the project
> dev like me still work on it
> I constantly request for mock-ups and infrastructure
> client never responds back, instead he raises issues ahead of sprint
> I snap back at him
> Client wants call now
> What the fuck
To be honest, I'm gonna take a stand here...fuck this shit man, no clear way of working
4 -
Deadass, best quote said by my PM in our sprint planning meeting:
"I'm just going to name this sprint 'sprint arlene1' because she's the loser who didn't make it onto AOL on-time".4 -
!rant
When after one month of the event, a month n a half of the request, and a failed delivery attempt, the swag finally arrives!!
Stickers!! <3
Happy scenes!
Thank you Mozilla!!
5 -
I fucking hate when my project manger makes me do demos on sprint reviews. I have enough fucking things to focus on. I don’t need this extra pressure. Fuck this. I hate public speaking. He thinks that it helps me to grow. Fuck him. 😒😒😒😒3
-
Spent an entire day clearing the backlog of the previous sprints in JIRA. Now i am seeing jira numbers everywhere :/2
-
'It's just...' is the biggest lie any co-dev can give you!
If it's just a small change why don't they do the god damn work and spend the next 2 days wading through an undocumented shit storm.
Next person to say 'It's just x, y & x', that ticket will be going up their tail pipe sideways! -
Thank you for deleting our very first sprint.
The development was horrible and the management was a bizarre.
Thank you JIRA, and that one gay who accidentally deleted all 120+ stories and task.
PS. Calling gay is not an offensive word. He likes being called gay2 -
I cant with this company any longer.
Most of it is crap but this is too much
Retrospective meeting after 2weeks sprint.
Sprint board for the meeting, in the not good section
1 -
Dual Core blasting on a friday morning... gotta love it. finished my sprint on time, now cleaning up.
1 -
Soooo lately my boss just introduced the AGILE methodology using Epics, UserStories, Tasks, etc. I enjoyed the approach so much. Scrums, Sprint meetings and the like. And also questioning him why ONLY NOW.
-
Boss calls a team leads meeting which is just me and the other guy. Rest are product or project managers.
Turns out they concerns over how our last few sprints are always left unfinished as the work in it doesn't get passed QA.
Tried to tell him how can devs work on something that failed QA on the last day of the sprint.
We have one QA person who tests 20 something devs work. We are massively under resourced and yet they want us to do everything and always end up making promises to clients that we can't keep coz our sprint doesn't have capacity.
Yet they are hiring more product managers instead of getting some more QA help.
Sick & tired of this shit. -
That moment when you are 50% ahead in the sprint and then the designer comes and says:
"I updated the design a bit"..
boom! an entire new website...
Ok maybe not that bad, but .... sometimes..... *sight* .... web designers :/ ... -
Every one of our sprint "planning" meetings.
We would sit and be told to estimate a bunch of defects we had never seen before. And then we wouldnt actually decide as a team what to commit to because it was assumed that we had to deliver everything in the backlog every sprint. This is what happens when you try to apply scrum to a maintenance team. -
At the Pycon Brasil in a sprint to help Russel Keith-Magee project, the PyBee and got the first accepted PR! The prize was this challenge coin! Everyone is welcome to join, check the project on https://github.com/pybee/
1 -
We had our first "real" sprint planning yesterday. This was a very superficial planning session, as my manager is, by the looks of it, not to keen on the whole "new process thing". Probably because it's not his way of doing things... or simply more simply put - this way round means he'll need find some new ways to crawl up the CTOs ass!
So glad I'm leaving! -
Dev: [does some weird code to make test pass]
Me: this won't work. Literally the documentation says what you did won't work once we move towards our end goal architecture.
Dev: [shows middle finger and requests merge and somehow managed to get code merged]
.... One Sprint later nothing works...
Dev: [does some weird code to make test pass]
Me: no. You need to solve underlying problem.
Dev: [shows middle finger and requests merge and somehow managed to get code merged]
.... One Sprint later nothing works...
Me: please stahp
Dev: [shows middle finger and requests merge and somehow managed to get code merged]
Me: WTF man do your fucking job
Scrum Master: stahp lowering our velocity
Me: wut? 😒2 -
So we had a sprint review earlier. There were like 20 bosses who attended, head of this, head of that. We spent 5 mins to demo our application, and another 55 minutes discussing the "delivery date" 🤯2
-
So today we had a pre-sprint-planning meeting where the POs told us about the stories currently in the backlog. They went ahead and "roughly prioritised" some of them. Their priorities were:
- normal (but asap please)
- has to be done this sprint, because the feature has to be in the next release (code freeze after this sprint)
- top priority, because this has to be in the previous release (which was released last friday)
The non-normal stories alone are about twice our normal velocity. Good job guys. Good job. -
I feel a bit like shit.
I started a new job about 2 months ago. Company is great， culture is amazing，project is interesting， processes are what i always dreamed.
This is after having learned the job from scratch at a startup that was all you can imagine. Tedious，hoping to be something that was not yet and so on....
So we are coming at the last week of a sprint. Its Tuesday and most stories are competed. We dont have a culture of jumping on others PR， its kind of like this is my PR kind of mentality. This is not established its more like an untold rule. But coming to the end i figured， especially if i knew exactly how to fix the PR that o should jump in a make it happen.
Person who owns those prs unassigned themselves from those and added me instead kind of like: “well take it if you want it....”
What are your rules regarding others prs and sprints?4 -
Demo driven development.
Fucking nightmare.
Did a simple search for TODO Statements in the code and almost fucking spilt my coffee.
And the best part, they will demo most of this in Sprint review as done.. WTF.
Done means "Ready to Release" not "Ready to Demo".2 -
Having a meeting to decide, when to have other meetings...
Scrum, scrum of scrums, workstream, planning, pm ,design review, architecture review, Sprint review on and on....on and on on...why can't i simply code:(4 -
When the scrum team complains in the last three to four sprint retros that were sick of back to back meetings ... MAYBE STOP SCHEDULING BACK TO BACK MEETINGS. Would it kill you to just spread them out a bit?4
-
My color combinations sprint be like:
23* - current best
36
81
111
170 ...
Either i am a typical programmer or way too choosy!!! -
Great my team just got dumped with all the other teams messes and incomplete work! Great sprint planning guys.
-
We have three sprint refinement meetings per week without any work. We just spent today's 1 hour refinement meeting without uttering a single word. Dumb Management 🤦🏻♂️2
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High priority Bugs from the legacy system were pushing productive work out of the sprint enough that a 1 year project due in 2 months was sitting on 6 months of backlog of just my work. There are days where having 20+ years at the company is not a bonus. Fortunately I finally got through to the boss that he wouldn't make any ground on the project at this pace and he had the PM step in. Last sprint I worked on the project nearly full time.
-
Is it common to have QA and Product Management in sprint planning? Cuz they are derailing sprint planning SO MUCH!!! I am internally screaming. Aaaaaaaaand they just extended the scope of one of the issues. Neat.11
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Our team moved to scrum a while back. But everybody still does story point estimation by mentally assigning 1 story point for each day of work it would require. :/
On top of that, management compares the performance of two *different* scrum teams based on the story points they finish in a sprint. :// -
I'm at that point where I want to lash out at our team for not finishing a sprint. I've been doing the scrum master/dev role for months now and each sprint is incomplete since we have started the agile way.
Most of my team members are seasoned senior devs and my team's downfall are caused by not acting as a team. I'm the youngest in the team and have been acting as a babysitter for them.3 -
I was put on some old forgotten project this sprint... looks like someone injected a shitload of heroin right into their frontal lobe and though it was a good idea to write a framework. Fuck.
-
You might think that getting your work done super fast is a good idea but it's really not. It takes QA awhile to test your tickets and give feedback. If you clear your sprint board, PMs will add more assignments... Then on top of that extra work, QA will give you feedback from your previous work. You now will be super stressed to get all of this done by the end of the sprint.
It is best to take your time and get it right the first time... I've also learned to make a buffer... which is tickets in my queue I've already completed but did not say I've competed yet. This way I can take extra time on tickets that need TLC and the PM team won't surprise you with backlog tickets. -
We can do what your saying in a week and spend the following two months redoing it, or, we can help you get your shit straight for a week and do it right in a week. So, 9 weeks versus a two week sprint. Your call Batman. I really don’t care anymore. It’s the holidays, it’s cold, and money is a great fire starter.
-
Dear Windows,
you done fucked it up!
I had a god damnit run, finishing the last mammoth task of our sprint.
Then, i decided to take a 3 minutes bio break.
Came back to my machine just to realise that this little OS bitch sneaked up on me, used the few seconds of my break to do a unholy, reboot of doom and damnation.
As a result, my virtual machine dropped it's php-storm settings...
I lost my precious focus on the task and my last nerves to figure out the correct settings again.
To cut a long story short.
We missed the aim of the Sprint.
The Sprint failed and i got a half-baked module.
At least, all the complicated businesslogic is proper covered by unittests.2 -
Feeling some Major imposter syndrome. Work is just so slow this time of year. Nothing in my sprint!2
-
Had a four hour retro/review yesterday. Plus a mini demo I had to put together. Three hour sprint planning session today.
And they still wanted me to go to some "company values" meeting tomorrow, aside from the weekly call I have to report progress. Fuck that shit.
I feel like I got nothing done this week. Monday and Tuesday were fine for the most part, but since it's been just complete idling.
I mean, I love my company, great coworkers, good management, and just all around great experience. But man, it gets frustrating when you lose so much development time... I wanted to sprinkle in some extra goodies for the next sprint, but it doesn't look like that's gonna happen.2 -
Our client supposedly managed our Jira board yesterday in preparation for the release to live.
It was a mess. We have two people on this project - so our effective maximum workload is 10 days worth of tickets.
The current sprint plus the next have over 60 tickets in them, with the other "light" sprints having about 15 days worth in them.
I know you shouldn't get caught up over estimates too much, but they're in place for a reason.
The client really needs a reality check, and to be reasonable. When looking from a macro perspective he loses sight of all reason and scope, trying to grossly overfill what the two of us can handle.
A junior and student placement dev can only do so much.
I guess time will tell how realistic 16th April is.. -
You know, I don't mind getting dragged if I deserve it. But it would be nice to have ALL the information I need to make an estimate BEFORE you hang me out to dry.
First I was told that work on this issue could be kicked down the road since we were getting big contracts. The next day the issue was in the sprint.
I tell you I won't be able to get it done with the business critical stuff you said absolutely had to be done that sprint (turns out we had 3 months of leeway even before COVID). You say alright cool. We push it to next sprint. The next day you say we have been pushing that issue too much and we absolutely have to get it done this sprint. At least have it so QA can look at it by Tuesday.
I give a preliminary look to QA cuz I found a bug, but they can test other shit about this fucking issue, but then get shut down fucking again because it isn't code complete.
STOP. MOVING. FUCKING. GOAL POSTS. AND. GASLIGHTING. ME.
And as a bonus, I disagree with the necessity of this work in general. I think it's fucking stupid, unnecessary, and zero value added. It's a management jerkoff issue that is going to piss off all of our users.1 -
Management suddenly decide to push for an early go-live for a product being worked on by another dev team in the company. As a result we are pulled in to help and get extra tasks loaded onto our sprint.
My co-worker pulled an all nighter to get the extra work done.
I emailed the project manager to remove items from my sprint to make space for the new work.
Am I lazy, or smart?6 -
How do you fit QA inside the weekly sprint?
At the end of a sprint, the team should be able to give something deliverable such as a new release.
How could the developers team integrate their work with the QA team along this week?
I mean, should we test individual features with QA as soon as they’re merged or make a pre-release test with all new features together before releasing? Develop 80% of the time and reserve last 20% for tests?
Could you share something or recommend any links?3 -
OK... so just spent 3 hours doing the Code Sprint.... 1.9/7 correctly answered... these were "Easy".
Well this is how I feel now....
btw any tips how to do these, seems like you have to be a real God to complete all of these? within just a few days. Do you really need to be able to do this at a tech company?
-
Our burndown chart went upwards this sprint. I'm sorry, I meant our burnup chart. It was an unforgettable sprint indeed.3
-
Everytime I applied long leave, my client and PM will plan for important feature, but they say start the sprint and for other new people i have to give KT, and they will take care. I know how that will screw up the system. So at the time it's nightmare late night at office, in office time KT, no weekends, stand-up for 1hr(every time QA will ask, what we get after this sprint). Stupid clients changing the requirements after stand-up.
Everytime code base screwed and need to refactoring. So as much as possible core functionality I'll complete and only bug fixing for newbie. I hate those days. -
!rant got to give an end of sprint demo for the ui my team had been working on for three weeks today, bosses said they were impressed with how much we got accomplished (we're all new college hires and this is only out second sprint) and didn't care that out demo was ran from a local machine rather than a proper web server
-
Meetings have the ability to slow you down like nothing else. The moment you feel you are about to crack the problem you have been working on.. ding! there comes a notification for the next meeting.
Currently my team has a mid sprint review meeting, an end sprint meeting, a let's plan the next sprint meeting, a team meeting, but the one I have absolute hatred for are daily standups.1 -
I love deadlines.
I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.
--- Douglas Adams
Work in the team goes
Whoosh whoosh whoosh
Whoosh whoosh whoosh
Work in the teams goes
whoosh whoosh whoosh
Although the sprint
-- me
Reference
Rhyme - wheels on the bus goes
Quote - https://goodreads.com/author/... -
Our project using Agile methodology, we have every day stand-up meeting(scrum meeting) that normally end around 10 to 15 minutes with 7 ppl.
One day The Project Owner came and join our stand-up meeting that cost us like sprint planning
And The Project Owner did not stop there, he come again next day for the 1 week.
Because of that our product backlogs and Sprint Planning goes haywire.
We failed to delivery what we planned for that project. -
I thought I posted about this awhile back but I didn't. I'm glad since the story is so much better now.
6 weeks ago: Told I'm going to be on a super fun JAMStack build with lots of sexy animations. Sweet, this will be a fun build!
5 weeks ago: Find out what the timeline on this incredibly ambitious project is. I start raising flags cause everything needs to go PERFECT for this to not blow up and/or turn in to a dumpster fire.
4 weeks ago: Project "kicks off" with a meeting with the client. We find out that they've decided to do another round of revisions on their design comps, but we have what we need for sprint 1. We provide a list of all the assets/information we still need for sprint 1 success.
3 weeks ago: Still waiting on some assets for sprint one, but we're fumbling our way through. Still waiting on the PM to get around to doing their PM job and building out our backlog / gathering requirements for us.
2 weeks ago: Sprint 1's end date comes and goes. Still need assets from the client, I've personally asked them for the same asset 3 different times. Sprint 1 gets extended 1 week.
1 week ago: We deliver sprint 1 page templates, minus the resources we're still waiting for. Get chewed out by the client regarding the pages not looking like their comps (Yeah, no shit sherlock, you never sent us the assets)
This week: Working on Sprint 2 commitments. We have 2x as many page templates to deliver, per developer, as we had the first sprint. Still waiting on Sprint 1 assets. Don't have Sprint 2 assets. Wait, what about the global styles? They still haven't sent those to us yet either.
Requirements? Guess I'll spend valuable dev time tracking those down for myself.
Client? Well, they're pissed off we haven't hit our commitments yet.
Oh well, at least we have a pimple faced, fresh out of college, CS major, with no real development experience rolling on to this cesspool of a project.
Other devs? Well, we're out of fucks to give. Lets just watch this thing burn.
Oh, I forgot to add, we have 17 page templates to deliever between today (2/27) and 3/18. #NoFuckingWay -
Had someone mention adding tasks to stories in our sprint mid-sprint is messing up the sprint statistics... Can someone explain to me how one is supposed to know every task and approximately how long it will take to complete for a given story before even opening the code base up?
This is currently my major gripe with agile / scrum. How exactly you're supposed to instinctively know the solution to a complicated problem, as well as the steps to implement it, the approximate time it'll take, AND roadblocks you'll run into on DAY ONE? WHAT?
Too often does a 2 point story turn into a 5 point story because deep down it was a more complicated problem than originally thought, and a good scrum developer is supposed to... Either clairvoyantly known that or just allocate hours into unrelated tasks?
Someone help me out here -
We need x amount of features, feature requests changing all week long and then we will demo.
3 days later, all work the for demo can be thrown away because it isn't in the sprint planning and probably the features aren't needed any more in the future. FML _-_ -
There are those few days in a sprint that could be extremely busy like these days.
Few days ago someone grabbed a chair, sat next to me asking questions and the chair is still there.
This week i have learnt that the chair is so dangerous, looking very inviting. -
We’ve talked to the client a couple of weeks ago that they are totally screwing up the process with changing prio’s and wanting a deploy every other day.
We are in a new sprint and it just happens again. We have this presentation and blabla it needs to go live NOW!
I’m so tired of this project...1 -
do you know the feeling, when it is friday and it is like nice hot weather 26°c. you kinda wished you could just zit outside and enjoy the view days of the summer that are not to hot or to cold (location: the netherlands).
this made me slack off today. only did my sprint planning for next monday and wrote some unit test and some software modification documents.4 -
The scrum master cries out for the team’s burndown chart as he move more unplanned work into the current Sprint.1
-
- the 2 hr meeting called for every day of a week, to prepare for a PPT which is to be presented to a higher up exec within 5 mins.
- the sprint planning meeting, where all the stories of that sprint are already weighted and assigned to the devs, but it still goes for 2 hrs
- the backlog grooming meeting, where instead of looking at the sprint backlog, the current sprint is looked at and discussed. -
Gosh, how I hate meetings at the beginning of the sprint... and at the middle... and in the end! Just fucking give me the requirements!4
-
Is anyone’s team here fully Agile and how has that been so far? My team is currently in sprint 0 and I’m already tired of the meetings.24
-
What is wrong with these people!!!
Last minute changes are pain in the ass... the design team review gives a go ahead but then pm team doesnt agree and and you have to get the changes suggested done in a day??!!!
In half a day you have to get ux review, peer review, module owner review, architect review, pm review and then merge publish bump and test in ci?!!end of sprint is today...
Ugh!!!every sprint!!every fuckin sprint!!! -
So I was reading Scrum for my exam all I can see was Meeting.
Product backlog meeting for 15 mins;
Enters to the office 5 mins meeting;
Sprint review meeting for 10mins;
Daily scrum 2 times meetings;
Sprint planning 3 hours of meeting;
Starting the next Sprint 30mins meetings;
Managing releases 45 min meeting;
Sprint Retrospective 45 mins of meeting;
Wtf? Do they do any work there?4 -
At the end of the sprint half of the stories didn't get done due to lack of coordination to put 4 people in the same room and get them to agree on the solution.
During Retro my Scrum Master says: Are these stories not done because we haven't estimated them during sprint planning? 😂 -
The one single time i succesfully remember my dream from the previous night it just had to be being in chased through a spooky building by this weeks sprint.2
-
Yes I know that's too many points this sprint.
I understand you have to have all the things.
No I can't move the stories out bc you gave us a hard deadline for the release. -
When your SCRUM Master cancels the sprint retro because he knows all hell is about to break loose.2
-
One time a pm told me to shut up during a sprint demo. I don't work there anymore. Forced me to find a place where I was a better fit.4
-
Is having breaking changes in an API at a very early stage normal? We have like every sprint at least 3 endpoints who have breaking changes 🤔 I mean, is having refactored code better then stability?1
-
Retrospective does not seem to work in practice as it does in theory.
Complain about what went wrong and what went right. Then at the next one, those issues still exist.
I might as well just have written in a diary to air my frustrations -
Just wondering on some agile best practices. Do you guys estimate efforts for defects? My PO is totally against it and says we deliver 5 to 7 pointers user stories + fix all the defects from previous sprint and current sprint, which I feel is over burdening the Dev team + in hurry to complete current sprint stories delivering poor quality work, which in turn become defects in the next sprint 😨 caught in this loop for a while now 😫4
-
If you host a contest, for fuck's sake, DO IT RIGHT. A 4 hour sprint coding contest? Oh boy, finally something I can find the time for! WOULD BE A SHAME IF THE SERVERS INSTANTLY STARTED CRASHING DUE TO OVERLOAD... 😤😤😤
-
I suppose to be on leave after few hours... The team leader added five task to my sprint tasks... No wonder...
-
whats your code sprint soundtrack? -- for me its alot of propeller heads, Crystal METHod, & Dual Core1
-
Vague requirement for feature A received from client
Business consultant refines
Example mapping done
Acceptance criteria defined
Scheduled in sprint
Development done
Unit tests passed
Pull request reviewed
Code merged and deployed to system test
Functional testing successful
Deployed to UAT
Client asked to sign off
Client: "Actually I don't want that feature." -
Is there anyone from India (Specifically Kerala) here who's going to the mozilla regional sprint today?6
-
What are your thoughts on sprint planning meeting with poker cards? ( Everytime we had those meetings, dev team points are always similar and rest of the people never)3
-
Definitely my current manager. He is very supportive of our career goals and has us choose both goals related to team performance and personal progression. He supports us having time at the end of the sprint to innovate and research things to bring back into the product. He gives constructive feedback and doesnt breathe down peoples necks.
-
Worked super hard the whole sprint on a module to get it perfect, only to find out today that 90% of it was just changed and will need to be redone next sprint.
1 -
I hate so much all those sprint related meetings. They literally take one day totalled (every 2 weeks).
Review, dry run demo, actual demo, planning, daily hourly meetings.... so much talking.8 -
Recently we've checked /sprint in HipChat to test batching of sprint status messages. For testing we wrote what first poped into our minds.
One Dev wrote /sprint We're on schedule
Another wrote /sprint Everything is broken, help
How different tests and first thoughts about progress sometimes can be?1 -
How to deal with micromanagment?
I just lose it when the team leader checks on issues on a hourly base, And dont get me started on the scrum master who checks the sprint status twice a day.
I can't quit this work but I'm losing mind here.
H-O-W T-H-E F-U-C-K do i deal with this idiotism??5 -
If you have not achieved the sprint and a meeting is scheduled why you have not achieved the sprint ... in the next sprint ...
-
Don't you love the neverending sprint?
You know the one that just inherits all the tickets from the last one? Each sprint packs on new cool features but along the way bug tickets come in for code you haven't even touched or wrote and you deal with them because they are blockers.
before you know it, sprint is over and ok to the next one. I'm pretty sure that is how this is supposed to work right?1 -
When my client asks my team for a simple script and my coworker spends an entire sprint writing a C++ application and complaining about how difficult it is.1
-
When you spend 3 or 4 hours working on a large PBI on Friday and you go into work early AF (6:30am) on Monday so you can finish before the end of the sprint on Tuesday, but they tell you in the morning stand up that the PBI will be abandoned.
-
Today I'll be part of a sprint on which only me and my coworker will work.
Usually its 4-5 people. And ive only worked 2.5 weeks now.
Im a bit nervous3 -
In my previous agile sprint I somehow completed my task before the halfway, that's why I got less buffer time and point in this sprint.
-
Four major network disruptions on east coast the past week. Today fiber cut in Florida effecting central Florida. Verizon, AT&T and Sprint have each had disruptions impacting many businesses and customers. Coincidence?
-
I just hate how all the the internet providers (Sprint and Verizon mainly) just attack each other. It is all about combating, attacking and 1upping to them.2
-
Finished Sprint-Task "Update WordPress-Core + Language >> 4.7" on wednesday evening.
Have to take it back into "doing" next morning, because 4.7.1 was released... -_-1 -
'we don't develop with quality just for the sake of it, just push it to finish the sprint'
Another gem from my scrum master -
Sprint planning meeting going nuts with 8 people shouting over each other and people standing up out of chairs to be heard.... Craziness.... Went in with expectation of just making skeleton of the user stories and discussed nitty gritty implementation details
-
So, towards the end of a particularly disruptive Sprint, the Product Owner Manager, who asked for A3 pictures explaining the flow to him and had multiple meetings with us and business and rewrote a spec of something already in development and changed priority of stories, wants to know... what is taking so long and business wants all these changes next week.
-
Last week, last sprint. Decided to migrate to latest trunk (it was svn back in the days) of the CMS we used just to get the new great feature. Customer really liked it, but didn’t like the bugs we found in the following weeks.
If you ask me, it worth and will do it again. -
Not really a Rant but:
My Productivity Method:
1. Nootropics (Nootrobox Daily, Sprint for 6+ hour work/focus periods)
2. Ketogenic Diet (Ridiculous Energy, Amazing Food Choices, No Crashing, No Cheating!)
3. Moderate Exercise
4. Get Lit (Partying) once a month at least, hard liquors.
5. Nicotine (Vaping 6mg) while coding.
6. Caffeine (Bulletproof Coffee)
7. League of Legends breaks.
8. Weekly Cigar Social with other professionals.
Balance Vice with Virtue is a great combination for getting stuff done.
What keeps you going?2 -
Submenu Boards doesn't show in Firefox 45.5.0 when viewing a single issue. This is really frustrating as I can't move quickly between the sprint board and a specific issue. What also sucks about jira is that there is no way to report bugs like this (perhaps Atlassian sincerely believe that they never have any bugs in their products), leaving devrant as the only resort to let out steam ;)
-
Developers wanted! No I'm not a recruitment agency
I'm relatively new to the field. Been working 2 years as a Web developer at the same company. So I want to ask, is it normal to be made to sprint plan live issues for any websites you maintain?5 -
When you've been handling multiple production defects and software PMR tickets for the last couple of months and the morning of a new sprint your JIRA/SCRUM/Kanban/task/whatever board is empty under your name. Feels good man.
-
Should you get tasks from the backlog when everything is done in actual Sprint? Or it is a good time to keep learning while waiting for next Sprint?3
-
Any of you guys that also faces existential crisis every sprint deadline? Not being able to fullfill PM's expectations is horrible.1
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!rant
There's a workshop here in Philippines about Sprint Design & it is based from this book.
Any of you guys read this book?
Does the concepts/ideas in the book helped you in your work/personal projects?
2 -
Today before leaving, the QA said she found problems in 3 issues I've been working on, until now everything was ok. Tomorrow is the closing of the Sprint but I can't present this progress because it's not completed...
I know the QA is doing her job but why now?
Hopefully I'll fix it tomorrow before the meeting1 -
Noticing that we have several stories in sprint that are scattered across the backlog, some are at the top, some at the bottom...
Me: I think we should prioritize the backlog.
PO: I agree; When do you think you'll be done?1 -
When devs have to test tickets end to end in stabilisation week that have passed in previous sprints because the company doesn't want to cough up more than 2 QAs...
I am not a tester. This is bullshit.
(Obviously I e2e test my tickets during the sprint before deploying and passing them on to QA to test and hopefully move on to 'Done') -
- we need to show progress to the business
- but rewriting this component to be generic AND implementing it on the whole website can't be completed in one sprint. This will require a lot of regression testing, modifications to existing functionality, etc. we need to split it in two
- that's disappointing
we were forced to write shitty patchworks for over 2 years and now everyone's surprised it takes time to replace with proper code -.- -
!rant
Quite an insight
"Is npm worth $2.6M?"
http://words.steveklabnik.com/is-np...
On a read sprint and I am sharing whatever I find interesting. -
!rant
Agile devs— do you attend sprint planning?
I want to, but my boss told me not to go (waste of my time, he says). Only leads attend them, then they come back with tickets for the rest of the team. But a few other devs I’ve spoken to found that absurd, since attending lets you choose your tickets to a certain extent.
Do you attend yours? Is it crazy not to? Am I missing out? (I ask bc ours is happening right now— and it’s so empty in here!)4 -
The Sprint started and this Stupid Lady did not finish her work yet and I am stuck till that. Funniest part is figuring out what to tell in the Daily Stand Up. ' Going through the Code and getting Familiar' :P
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1) Guess how many beans (hours) are in the jar (sprint).
2) Pad my estimate with 12 beans.
3) Be high and have to have meetings in which I explain bean counting is not an exact science and insist that meetings about how we count beans will only put us behind further and will never ever make us better bean counters.
or
3b) Be under, have extra time in the sprint, only to have product management fill the jar with more beans until I'm wrong again. -
Task: Research how to refector our grid component to be usable with Redux
Result: The next sprint will be used to replace Angular 5 by React
what happend? Not that I am not happy with the decision but this was a quite unexpected result.3 -
When we take user stories in sprints but dependencies are not resolved. I have to wait till n-1 the day for the upstream team to go to UAT and then push half my tasks to next sprint for testing \ prod . Fuck the planners - _-|-_-¦
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When they had three weeks to get through their sprint and they still arnt done but yet you get done your 2 week sprint in 4 days. So much for deadlines and commitment to meet them...
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Ok the sprint review is tomorrow, there are lots of work to do and qe are half slept, this gonna end well :)
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Let me share my sprint with you.
So, we lost a developer this at the start of the sprint because the organisation we work for is total cancer.
Project manager frequently says to us that it's better to under commit than over commit.
Come sprint planning, we commit to exactly what we know we can achieve.
Of course, the PM whinges and says we need to put more in the sprint. So, we say sure, but we can't guarantee we will deliver everything on time.
Fast forward 2 weeks, we complete 90% of what we committed to.
PM is whinging at stand ups, asking us why some user stories are still in 'ready for test'.
We try to explain to the PM that 2 weeks ago we made ourselves very clear that this point 2 weeks later would most likely happen.
PM stops whining.
Tester starts whinging about only having a couple of days to test. Blames developers for not adhering to acceptance criteria.
>User stories aren't actually user stories, they're user essays.
How do you deal with this?3 -
AI iis not easy. Its very difficult. Its not a hobby. Its a life long sprint. And you may never get the hang of it.
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I got a task to work on during sprint planning on Monday. Felt the task was a 2hour task and procrastinated to do it on Tuesday. Tuesday came and I pushed it to Wednesday.
Today is Friday and I'm just realizing the task is a microservice on it's own. FML1 -
I wonder if we will have a sprint review meeting for 2016. You know to prevent the shit storm that happened to continue ...
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