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dude: hey could you hand me a patch cable ?
me: how long?
dude: as short as possible
me: sure buddy
😂😂
15 -
One of my bosses is walking through the hall brushing his teeth, and another is cooking waffles with a waffle iron. It's 124032
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I FUCKING MADE IT GUYS! I JUST PASSED THE HARDEST COURSE AT UNIVERSITY WHICH IS ABOUT DATA STRUCTURES AND ALGORITHMS! I DRAGGED THIS WITH ME A WHOLE YEAR AND I JUST GOT THE NOTIFICATION THAT I MADE IT. I'M SO FUCKING HAPPY GUYS I CANT BELIEVE IT!!!!!!24
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I have upgraded my graphics from medium to high. And also set anti aliasing to the highest and now everything seems beautiful.
16 -
I made a web app team mad because I'm forcing them to implement HTTPS on their huge website made of sticks and stones.
NO REGRETSSS6 -
So... I wanted to share something I made this weekend... 😁😁
Made an ls program which includes colors and icons! It is a work in progress and probably contains some bugs here and there, but I really wanted to share with you all.
The happiest thing to me about it is that I made it in pure C and had a blast creating it! It’s my first actual C project and it also made me realize that there is probably no language I can love more than C.
Take look if you are interested and tell me how it is 😊 suggestions and fixes are more than welcome 😁
https://github.com/Electrux/...
Just wanted to share the experience. Have a good day everyone! 😁
34 -
I was in a public place on my laptop, and my laptop went into hibernation to save battery. I switched it back on and then the laptops BIOS came up saying that the battery was critically low, nothing bad here.
Instead of clicking continue, I decided to press "Diagnostics" instead. The diagnostics immediately began to run in the BIOS.
The screen began to show different coloured bars and patterns, obviously a screen test. Then a prompt appeared asking me if coloured bars were displayed. The options were yes and no, and a button saying "Exit" in the top right. Me, not wanting to do a full diagnostics on such a low battery, pressed exit.
The screen turned black, and then flashed red. The beeper on the motherboard began to beep at an ear-piercing volume. It sounded as if it was a bomb about to go off. Everyone around me stared and some people began to even panic. I tried switching it off by holding the power button but nothing was happening. People were just staring all around me.
After about 10 seconds, the beeping stopped and the screen displayed an error message similar to this:
"CRITICAL ERROR: Monitor test FAILED.
No user input was provided."
Moral of the story: Make your program account for all possible options.11 -
JetBrains released KotlinConf app
Backend made with Kotlin
Frontend made with Kotlin
Android made with Kotlin
AND GODDAMN IOS made with Kotlin!
Holy shit, that's awesome
https://github.com/JetBrains/...10 -
Made myself a little sparker :3 judging from the spark gap, the output is about 6-7kV I guess. Can't measure it though, it's way too high for my multimeters to handle. Taser, beefed up bugzapper module, electronic cigarette lighter, so many possible uses for this thing 😋
49 -
who ever has this as their skill set are legends!!
made me laugh going through thousands of lines of skills :D
"
A little bit of Lua in my life
A little bit of JS is all i need
A little bit of bash is what i see
A little bit of JSON in the sun
A little bit of Python all night long
A little bit of TCL here i am
A little bit of this makes me your dev
"1 -
> me on call
> had to much wine
> suddenly, phone starts making sound
> holy shit, I am on call and I am not supposed to drink
> Calls taxi because shit is looking bad at work. Everything look down according to the sms I get, I had to pay the taxi from my own pocket.
> 40 min later, arrive at work. Walk into the serverroom.
> Go to the the server that is monitoring everything.
> Check networkcable, it is loose. Push it a little.
> Goddamnit, that was it.
> Realize I never doublechecked if stuff really was down from home....5 -
I hate it when stupid ideas go public and get a huge valuation. Snap at ~$24b just means more of my mother asking why I haven't made something like that yet and everyone else pitching me their dumb ideas at my birthday party.3
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!rant
Finally finished the blanket I’ve spent a month crocheting without a pattern after teaching myself to crochet at, like, the beginning of the month. It’s huge (this is it laying on a King sized bed) and I made so many mistakes that seem super obvious now, but I’m still weirdly proud of it.
8 -
Just found out out what people google about programmers...
the last one made my day. I think it was this feeling called "funny" haha
3 -
Nice, I just removed my dpkg folder instead of dpkg/lock. Today is the first and only day for this week I can sit at my desk to work and this is first thing I did. And then I whine that I'm stressed and couldn't finish my tasks.
If I were not me, I would slap that-guy.6 -
Many people say, that devRant made it to their home screens.
On my phone, devRant made it to the quick actions.
7 -
Am so fricking happy right now. Last year I posted a screenshot of one my apps hitting over 10k downloads. Well today i woke up and another one of my apps has over 12k monthly active users too. Feeling like a champion!
12 -
I am much too tired to go into details, probably because I left the office at 11:15pm, but I finally finished a feature. It doesn't even sound like a particularly large or complicated feature. It sounds like a simple, 1-2 day feature until you look at it closely.
It took me an entire fucking week. and all the while I was coaching a junior dev who had just picked up Rails and was building something very similar.
It's the model, controller, and UI for creating a parent object along with 0-n child objects, with default children suggestions, a fancy ui including the ability to dynamically add/remove children via buttons. and have the entire happy family save nicely and atomically on the backend. Plus a detailed-but-simple listing for non-technicals including some absolutely nontrivial css acrobatics.
After getting about 90% of everything built and working and beautiful, I learned that Rails does quite a bit of this for you, through `accepts_nested_params_for :collection`. But that requires very specific form input namespacing, and building that out correctly is flipping difficult. It's not like I could find good examples anywhere, either. I looked for hours. I finally found a rails tutorial vide linked from a comment on a SO answer from five years ago, and mashed its oversimplified and dated examples with the newer documentation, and worked around the issues that of course arose from that disasterous paring.
like.
I needed to store a template of the child object markup somewhere, yeah? The video had me trying to store all of the markup in a `data-fields=" "` attrib. wth? I tried storing it as a string and injecting it into javascript, but that didn't work either. parsing errors! yay! good job, you two.
So I ended up storing the markup (rendered from a rails partial) in an html comment of all things, and pulling the markup out of the comment and gsubbing its IDs on document load. This has the annoying effect of preventing me from using html comments in that partial (not that i really use them anyway, but.)
Just.
Every step of the way on building this was another mountain climb.
* singular vs plural naming and routing, and named routes. and dealing with issues arising from existing incorrect pluralization.
* reverse polymorphic relation (child -> x parent)
* The testing suite is incompatible with the new rails6. There is no fix. None. I checked. Nope. Not happening.
* Rails6 randomly and constantly crashes and/or caches random things (including arbitrary code changes) in development mode (and only development mode) when working with multiple databases.
* nested form builders
* styling a fucking checkbox
* Making that checkbox (rather, its label and container div) into a sexy animated slider
* passing data and locals to and between partials
* misleading documentation
* building the partials to be self-contained and reusable
* coercing form builders into namespacing nested html inputs the way Rails expects
* input namespacing redux, now with nested form builders too!
* Figuring out how to generate markup for an empty child when I'm no longer rendering the children myself
* Figuring out where the fuck to put the blank child template markup so it's accessible, has the right namespacing, and is not submitted with everything else
* Figuring out how the fuck to read an html comment with JS
* nested strong params
* nested strong params
* nested fucking strong params
* caching parsed children's data on parent when the whole thing is bloody atomic.
* Converting datetimes from/to milliseconds on save/load
* CSS and bootstrap collisions
* CSS and bootstrap stupidity
* Reinventing the entire multi-child / nested params / atomic creating/updating/deleting feature on my own before discovering Rails can do that for you.
Just.
I am so glad it's working.
I don't even feel relieved. I just feel exhausted.
But it's done.
finally.
and it's done well. It's all self-contained and reusable, it's easy to read, has separate styling and reusable partials, etc. It's a two line copy/paste drop-in for any other model that needs it. Two lines and it just works, and even tells you if you screwed up.
I'm incredibly proud of everything that went into this.
But mostly I'm just incredibly tired.
Time for some well-deserved sleep.7 -
Teacher to student: convert this active voice into passive voice: “I made a mistake”.
Student: “I was made by mistake”1 -
when my relatives know I'm studying IT:
"ooh, did you know that this guy made this and become rich, and this guy made this app and is rich now too, so why haven't you made anything yet?"
//its not that simple...3 -
Who decided it was a good idea to use this as a desktop PC's adapter?
Yeah lets change the kind of cable you need to power on our pc to one that apperently nobody sells. Profits guarenteed.
4 -
An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field.
Niels Bohr41 -
It's rant time!
So, as a broke electrical engineering student, I got this job in a local company. They used JSF and my skills in java were, at the very least, small (former PHP developer). But as a self taught developer this didn't stopped me and I went full on java learning (very bad year for my EE studies).
I became the 'guy in charge' for several of their projects (yeah, they did exploited broke students, I realized this far too late). I was very proud of myself, I worked hard, showed my true value, and they became impressed.
One nice thursday night, my "handler" emailed me with a urgent request. They needed an entire jsf application done by monday and the requirements were fairly complex.
Oh boy, I had a total of 10h of sleep from thursday to monday. I didn't even slept before going to my monday class, but I delivered the system. Got an pat in the back... "you're awesome"... I was happy.
6 months later: I received an email asking to fix a bug in the system. No problem with that. Oddly, this bug was a MAJOR bug. There's no way the system worked properly for six months with it. I fixed it in no time and commited the changes.
Turns out that this was the first time the system was going to be deployed. They made me go in an insane weekend dev project, and didn't even used the system for SIX MONTHS!!! I started to work my way out the company after this, aiming to open my own software company.
I still remember some other rants from the time I worked there. But these are for later.
Nice week for you all, may the sprint go gently and the clients be kind.1 -
GodDAMN, C# 7.0 is so ridiculously feature packed. I can pattern-match inside a predicate on an exception filter. Want to catch ONLY NHibernate's exceptions caused by a SQL timeout? Boom:
catch (GenericADOException adoEx) when (adoEx.InnerException is SqlException sqlEx && sqlEx.Number == -2) { return Failure("timeout"); }7 -
I'll just leave this here. RIP Firebug.
Not only you made me the front end developer I'm today, you also made me a man.3 -
So, I've been having to deal with server issues and other BS. All of these issues have caused all of my websites to be down. For the longest time, I couldn't get Nginx to find my websites' directories except for the default Nginx website, so I changed the default Nginx website to what you see in the image.
I tried to be funny, did I succeed? Even a little bit?
8 -
Most of the times I really hate typos, coz they seem like carelessness, lack of preciseness. But this delightful method name just made my day:
ReceiveBackendMassage -
New cooler for CPU installed.
Damn it. Was long overdue, old cooler was way undersized after an CPU upgrade.
I knew it would be tricky. But damn... My motherfugging stubbornness.
*sigh*
1mm over RAM heatspreader, took a long time getting blindly the cooler fixed... Screwing blindly isn't fun.
15 -
-click-
MySQL: 'the table does not exist'
I just fucking made the temp table dude, that's what you literally do in step 1 .... how could it not....
-click-
MySQL 'Records: 1 Duplicates: 0 Warnings: 0'
Me: "Oh there we g---"
-click-
MySQL: 'the table does not exist'
Me: "Hey you just worked!"
-click-
MySQL: 'the table does not exist'
GOD DAMN IT
-click-
-click-
-click-
-click-
-click-
-click-
MySQL 'Records: 1 Duplicates: 0 Warnings: 0'
Me: Uh you're working now?
-click-
MySQL 'Records: 1 Duplicates: 0 Warnings: 0'
-click-
MySQL 'Records: 1 Duplicates: 0 Warnings: 0'
-click-
MySQL 'Records: 1 Duplicates: 0 Warnings: 0'
Guess that API just needed breaking in....3 -
I made a js script using google and pieces of an already made script without knowing a bit of js.
Amazing how all programming languages are so similar.1 -
Yesterday I made a survey from MDN. Then I came to this question. Who made this survey, this is just... no!
6 -
My foolishness of giving into an almost impossible dream seems to be finally setting in.
So the client, who is also my relative is launching an hotel. He wanted a website for the hotel with booking facility. The budget was plenty for that requirement and I was okay. In my calculations 20% of the proposed budget seemed fair to charge.
Few months in, it turns out he now wants a hotel booking platform where other hotels can also be listed. The reasoning was he wants to avoid the commissions charged by popular booking sites and also feature his own hotel in the booking platform that was about to be build.
I was skeptical about his intentions and my skills in developing it. I was also concerned whether he understood the responsibilities and overhead costs of running such a platform. He talked like it'll be fine. I calculated my billing to about 50% of the budget. I left the other 50% intentionally because I knew it would need for keeping up the site.
Time goes by, i am now 90% into completion of the new requirement.
Few weeks ago, i had informed about server pricing and I quoted a starting price of $15 per month. He seemed quite shocked. His reaction shocked me too and I got concerned whether I would even get rest of the payment ( already got 10% of proposed budget ) as advance.
Just few days ago, he now has a new requirement. He wants to show the hotel pricing from the booking site in Google Maps search. I tried to understand him that those are Ads and I was pretty sure price of running those ads are beyond his budget and probably negate any savings he is trying to make by competing popular booking platforms. Signing up for Hotel Ads as a booking platform is quite challenging. I don't think it'll happen.
I am now concerned he might bail on the project, so I have not informed yet. I just hope I get paid for the work I done and I'll inform then. :P
Anyways, the journey of it's development was quite insightful and challenging experience. I fell in love with a language I knew existed but never really bothered about and a framework whose only thing I knew was that it's name sounded cool to say.5 -
I can't believe I've been here for a year already. Where has the time gone?
Well, here's to another year of ranting with like-minded people!1 -
Tech head fires a mail few days company is planning a hackathon. Overnight at office, with food, music and home drop offs in morning. We devs feel excited we will get time to work on our personal projects and complete them.
Yesterday, tech head fires a mail about the topics. Guess what? The topics are projects which company needs to scale up... Image recognition and text extraction. Selenium. Esign.
Now I am searching for an excuse to skip the hackathon...4 -
As a programmer my girlfriend thought I did web design.
Me: If I did web design it'd come with a label saying ~---{Made in China}.1 -
Best client I have ever experienced. Kappa
So, I got job to recreate one old website, because the old one was incredibly fucked up. She told us, it was made by someone retarded.
The code was fucked up even more than UI. It was definitely written by some kind of idiot. Diacritics, mixed languages, no OOP, no FW, just copy&paste. Yeah copy and paste for every page.
The DB was another level of shit. Inifine is not enough to describe it. Column names with whitespace, diacritics, uppercase, lowercase...pure hell. Yeah and I had to import it.
Whenthe new website was ready for testing I got an email from her that it was her who made the website... HER!! Fucking hell, no more of this please!1 -
Poking at Linux is like playing with fire. You think you've got the hang of it, then a load of smoke happens.1
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The day we had to have an app ready for an upcoming demo. Management said everything needed to be done by the end of the day. My change was done, but was dependant on another change being merged first. I had been in the office since 8am. It didnt get merged until 5pm. I was in the office until 8pm trying to fix the insane merge conflicts. In the end i gave up and went home. The next day we discovered that the "deadline" was made up anyway so we still had time. I wanted to flip every single table in that office.1
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A legacy custom made WordPress Theme.
Old developer made main styling sheet with 8000+ lines of code with no component separation. -
Lets make sure that we are always using the latest software! Keep things up to date#
..... (new version of bulma.io comes out)
..... (Updating libraries...)
.....
Why is the website all fucked up looking?
Shit they changed the padding level on like everything?!
..... Reverting back to older version, fuck that idea.2 -
I just started a new job today and I fucking love it. I've learned more in a day than I do on a weekly basis in school. It's difficult but exciting as fuck to actually be able to use the technologies you've learned in a professional context.
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I wrote a parody of Sound of Silence based on the struggles of cleaning up people's shit in the shop
============
Hello problems, my old friends
I've come to talk with you again
Because a driver softly creeping
Left its seeds while RAM was leaking
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within the sound of crashing
In restless dreams I walked alone
Narrow bands of networking
'Neath the halo of a burned-out fan
I turned my collar to the hot and spinning
When my eyes were stabbed by the flash of an LED light
That split the night
And touched the sound of crashing
And in the naked light I saw
Ten thousand tasks, maybe more
Programs malloc with no swap
Programs writing with no space
Programs writing bits that voices never play
And no one dared
Disturb the sound of crashing
"Fools, " said I, "You do not know
Malware, like a plague, it grows
Hear my words that I might teach you
Take my tools that I might help you"
But my words, like silent raindrops fell
And echoed in the wells, of crashing
And the programs bowed and prayed
To the malware god they made
And Windows flashed out its warning
In the words that it was forming
And Windows said, "The words of the prophets are written in the event log
And dumped over COM"
And whispered in the sounds of crashing2 -
Finally got myself a rocketbook everlast. Now just 1 Notebook instead of pads and bits of paper. It was a sound investment and the phone app for scanning is great. I can scribble all i want and only save the important bits. I’d highly recommend this.
https://kickstarter.com/projects/...
you can buy it on amazon.
its not an advert, it helped me stay organised and just wanted to share with the community.2 -
Aye i made a 'game' to test out a library i made and it is moderately fun so i made an app from it. Here if anyone cares to try it.
https://1drv.ms/u/...
(the back button is pretty buggy, just use home button to exit)14 -
!rant && story
tl;dr I lost my path, learned to a lot about linux and found true love.
So because of the recent news about wpa2, I thought about learning to do some things network penetration with kali. My roommate and I took an old 8gb usb and turned it into a bootable usb with persistent storage. Maybe not the best choice, but atleast we know how to do that now.
Anyway, we started with a kali.iso from 2015, because we thought it would be faster than downloading it with a 150kpbs connection. Learned a lot from that mistake while waiting apt-get update/upgrade.
Next day I got access to some faster connection, downloaded a new release build and put the 2015 version out it's misery. Finally some signs of progress. But that was not enough. We wanted more. We (well atleast I) wanted to try i3, because one of my friends showed me to /r/unixporn (btw, pornhub is deprecated now). So after researching what i3 is, what a wm is AND what a dm is, we replaced gdm3 with lightdm and set i3 as standard wm. With the user guide on an other screen we started playing with i3. Apparently heaven is written with two characters only. Now I want to free myself from windows and have linux (Maybe arch) as my main system, but for now we continue to use thus kali usb to learn about how to set uo a nice desktop environment. Wait, why did we choose to install kali? 😂
I feel kinda sorry for that, but I want to experiment on there before until I feel confident. (Please hit me up with tips about i3)
Still gotta use Windows as a subsystem for gaming. 😥3 -
Don't you love writing a novel, get to a section introducing some of the higher up main characters and you can only remember 3 of the 8 names... Yeah me too 😃🔫
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!rant; story(well, kinda)
I made it! Hell fucking fuck yeah! I made it, I made it, I made it! I passed all exams! See you in Prague, at ČVUT!(those who happen to study/live there or nearby)
life.setStatus("Winning!");1 -
Today ... Like other day i wake up. And go satisfy all the need of my client in the chat .. and remove what i made and unmade and made and unmade and made and change color and more at left and more at top add padding bottom and unmade and made and save and clear cache and unmade and clear cache and made and change color.
You see the shiti pattern now
😒😒😒😒😔😔😔😔😑2 -
Fucking Mess!
Apparently my code flunked during deployed cause some retard didn't pull the code and made his commit. Unfortunately this was after I MADE MY COMMIT.
noobs! -
WHY THE F*CK CAN'T I DELETE FILES STARTING WITH A DOT USING FTP?
Guess these files will be there for ever...7 -
I don't know how much of this can be considered data loss but one one of my uni classmates frustrated by some hellish tasks (cleaning some old code files probably) decided that everything in that particular directory won't be of any further need, so she procede to rm -rf it.. only to discover that the terminal opened in that dir was another one and her current one (the one she bashed that unforgiving rm) was in fact a standard freshly opened term where any term would open.. in the user's (only user) home dir... such a face she had when all her codes, homeworks, projects and everything went to oblivion 😂😂 jokes aside it was a good thing that the semester was almost finished, all hws submited and no important data was there as she dual booted with ubuntu and some windows, but funny thing how such a honest mistake can ruin not only your day, but maybe your entire semester1
-
Is there any incident, which made you fall in love with programming but as well as made hate at the same time?
Mine was, when I implemented an algorithm without any prior knowledge and it worked somehow for majority test cases(which made me fall in love), but after test case changed the algorithm failed(Which made me hate myself)...2 -
"[Gen] WRONG PIPE, BUCKO!"
- One of my processes, from a program I have made, to tell myself I have made a mistake -
/**
* Refund Test Assert
* If this block makes it into production
* I made it as a developer
**/
for(var sub : subscriptions)
if(sub.hasEnded()) refundCustomer(sub.Id);1 -
I spent the last 1.5 hours trying to optimize delivery of two 8.0KB JS files. It didn't work, at all tried like everything I could find. At the end I initialized it in angular json and made it load regardless. Made me realize that it is not made for optimization.1
-
Had a lab for class that asked for something super simple in Java. All you had to do was submit your source code when it was done, go through some test conditions, and if it passed you were free to go. I finished the work in 10 minutes, yet spent the next 40 trying in vain to submit it. The work was fine, I knew it was right, but no matter what I changed, the damn thing wouldn't accept my work. After countless attempts and changes, getting the professor herself over there looking at it, I finally figured it out.
I was submitting the class file by mistake.
Some errors are harder than others, I guess. -
A random Thought: So, let me get this straight, the programmers that went to university think that the ones that didn't went to university are incompetent and all those that didn't went to university think that all that did are incompetent, right?5
-
Who made friends here at devrant?
Cuz I made none and I would love to have some Dev friends over the world.... 😄14 -
Fuck Oracle, fuck you oracle! The stupidest shittiest worst nightmare company with the most user-unfriendly, productivity-killing, illogical, stupid pile of software garbage products ever! And unfortunately I want to extends my worm-fucks to all Oracle employees and maintainers and to the whole fucking community of shit that made up oracle-community and to every conscious being who ever liked, enjoyed or have found the slightest genuine interest of any product tagged "oracle".
I installed the pile of shit a.k.a Oracle 18c and imported a dumb file locally, everything was working in the slightest amount of the word (fine) before it turns to nightmare. I created a C# client to call a stored procedure in that shit of a database engine. I kept getting error related to the parameter types, specifically one which is custom type of Table of numbers. It turns out that the only of doing this is through that shit they called (unmanaged driver), the "managed" doesn't support custom types. So I had to install another package of shit they call (odbc universal install) "universal my a$$ by the way", at that moment, where everything just crashed and stopped working. I spent 3 hours trying to connect to the fucking database to no avail. I shockingly found a folder in my desktop folder called (OracleInstallation) and all windows services related to oracle installation "suddenly" got somehow (re-routed) to that folder.
In conclusion, fuck oracle.4 -
Manager put me working on the crm, it was made using opentabs 1.4 which was made using ofbiz, fuck coding in xml
-
Decided to skip over some comments made by people known to be full of shit much the same stuff as their soul is made of2
-
Was tasked to implement a PIM, they suggested Akeneo, but I wanted something I could scale out to my imagination. Frontend Design is not my thing so I ripped out the template of Akeneo...
Hello best of both worlds! 😂1 -
!rant
Am I the only one who has made a semi-functional compiled programming language because they're bored?2 -
For the people investing in crypto: http://imgur.com/a/C32Taqt
A small reminder I made in IT class of course using the best programming language of all times about the best coin of all times.
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