Her: Hey, just heard what John did to you.

Me: Yea. I can't believe he screwed me over like that. I thought he was my friend.

Her: Don't worry. Forget about the bustard. You know #FFF

Me: 🙁 #FFF? What does white got to do with all this.

Her: What???

Me: #FFF. This is white.

Her: Nooooo. It means Fuck Fake Friends. As in the G. Eazy song.

Me: Ohhh😐

Call internet provider to ask about a problem :
costumer service: in order to help you, I need to know what windows version do you use, Windows 8, windows 7...
Me: I use linux
Costumer service : I'm sorry, we don't provide support to Windows Linux

I BOUGHT A DOMAIN IN MY SLEEP!!!

Now I don't know what to do with it!

It's depressing how true this is

Me: "Tech support, how can I help you?"
Them: " I'm not able to log into the website!"
Me: "Okay, what message is it showing when you try to log in?"
Them: "Sir, I am NOT a computer person so I don't know."
Me: "Do you know which web browser you're using?"
Them: "I don't know what that is!"
Me: "Okay, when you want to go on the internet, do you click on a blue E, or a mulicolored circle, or..."
Them: "SIR I ALREADY TOLD YOU THAT I AM NOT A COMPUTER PERSON, YOU'RE REFUSING TO THELP ME SO I'M GOING TO HANG UP"

Got a phone call: I got an error, what do I do?
Me: what kind of error?
Her: I closed it.
Me: what did it say?
Her: I don't know, it was a window with "ok" and "cancel"
Me: why didn't you read it?
Her: I don't understand this computer language.

/me dies a little inside.
There is nothing quite as stupid as people who refuse to read their own language as soon as it appears on a screen.
They make those things for a reason.
This happens too often.

Phone rings, IT guy next to me answer. I didn't listen what the user said.

IT: Hi, what can I do for you?
User: ...
IT: Ok, try with 123456
User: ...
IT: What's the name of the network?
User: ...
IT: Hmm, I don't know that network
User: ...
IT: HOW THE @#$% WOULD I KNOW YOUR HOME WIFI PASSWORD?!!!

Got a great boss!!;

Me: Hey, do we have a corporate GitHub account?
Boss: *excitedly* do we need it? We'll get it!
Me: uhh, yeah, we need it 😉

Don't care he doesn't know what it is, got his trust to get all the right tools!

When the internet breaks down, us web devs don't know what to do. 😂 Yay for early lunch!

that feel when you see "contact the administrator" and you don't know what to do, because you are the administrator

My boss has this habit of telling me what to do, followed by "thats easy" and "it should take you about <half the time it actually takes to do it barely okeish>"

My boss does not code and whenever I try to explain why stuff takes as long as it does he replies with, thats technical, I don't want to know...

Quiting my job at the end of the week : )

Me: I'd like a new phone please.
Manufacturer: Okay, what do you look for in a phone?
Me: Well as long as the other specs are good, it's important to have a headphone port, SD card slot, and removable battery.
Manufacturer: Okay, fingerprint scanner. Got it.
Me: What?
Manufacturer: The only thing you want is a fingerprint scanner?
Me: No I don't care about that, what I want is-
Manufacturer: A fingerprint scanner, we know. Every device needs one.
Me: But-
Manufacturer: Shhh... Don't worry, we know our customers.

People who don't understand what I code or who don't even know what a freaking "code" is, telling me how to do my job!! Then my reaction will be like -

QA: Please Look at this Defect.
Me: Okay not a problem!
QA: Thanks
Me: <Starts to look at Defect>
QA: 2 mins later. Do you have an ETA on when it will be fixed?
Me: Not yet, I'm still looking at it.
QA: Do you know what time it can be fixed? I have a deadline.
Me: I don't know what's wrong yet, I can't tell you when it will be fixed if I don't know what's wrong.
QA: Okay. Update Me.
Me: Opens Dev Rant.

Trying to explain my job to friend who don't know computers.

Friend: So what do you do?
Me: Well they call me a "DevOps Engineer", but really I am just a Release or Automation Engineer.
Friend: What is that?
Me: Well I assist developers build and deploy their code as well as write code to automated the whole process and build the virtual servers.
Friend: So you like program?
Me: Kinda...
Friend: Dude can you write an app for me, got some ideas!
Me: (blinks) no.

On call part 3: I'M BACK ON THE CAL FROM YESTERDAY FOR THE LAST 6.5 HOURS AND THEY'RE JUST DOING WHAT I TOLD THEM TO DO YESTERDAY. Is it because I'm female? Does having boobs mean I don't know how ssl works and that I can't possibly know about networks? I'm seriously about to just hang up and tell them to deal with it on their own.

Cup is there because it expresses my mood.

Apparently, part of being a software engineer means knowing how to read minds and do other people's jobs.

While implementing a user story for marketing, we found some associated features that, according to the database, have not been used for years. We tell them this. We do the courtesy of asking, "Hey, is there anything on the site that is utilizing these features? We'd like to clean up the DB."

"We don't know."

Engineering suggests, "Ok, lets turn the feature off, then, and see if anyone complains. It's been years according to the DB."

Marketing gets angry and hostile and says, "That's not the way to do things!"

I don't vocalize, "Well, not knowing how to do your own damned job is not the way to do things."
-
Marketing asks us to integrate a third party feature to the site. We ask, "Ok, what page do you want it on, and what information do you want to collect, and what should it look like?"

"I don't know. You're engineering. You tell us."

We implement it as best we can.

Marketing says, "HEY! This isn't done right! It's missing this and this and this!"

"Did you ask us to implement that? According to the user story, it passes acceptance criteria."

Marketing says, "I thought you would just know that! I didn't know it was a separate thing. Just put it on all the pages, then. You guys really should know the site better."

Engineering gets angry and hostile
-
Marketing says, "We need this removed from the site."

Engineering replies, "We have a GUI for that. Just go to this URL and you can do it yourself."

Marketing replies, "Well, if that's a really complicated thing, can you just run a script against the DB?"

Engineering says, "If we've built a UI for you, we really shouldn't be executing SQL scripts directly against the DB."

Marketing gets angry and hostile.
-
Engineering tries asking nicely.

"Marketing, if you want us to add new stuff to the site, or change stuff, please tell us what it is and where it should go and what the customer experience should be like."

Marketing replies, "We don't know the site that well. We are leaning on you to tell us."

I do not vocalize, all while trying to keep my eyes from bulging out of my head, my face red with rage, "YOU ARE IN CHARGE OF SELLING SHIT ON A WEBSITE THAT YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT. YOU ARE ASKING FOR CHANGES TO SOMETHING YOU DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND. WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE?"

Engineering is angry and hostile.

Application has had a suspected memory leak for years. Tech team got developers THE EXACT CODE that caused it. Few months of testing go by, telling us they're resolving their memory leak problem (finally).

Today: yeah, we still need restarts because we don't know if this new deployment will fix our memory leak, we don't know what the problem is.

WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU DOING IN THE LOWER REGIONS FOR THREE FUCKING MONTHS?!?!?! HAVING A FUCKING ORGY???????????????

My friends took the time to find your damn problem for you AND YOU'RE GOING TO TELL ME YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT THE PROBLEM IS???

It was in lower regions for 3 MONTHS and you don't know how it's impacting memory usage?!?!?! DO YOU WANT TO STILL HAVE A JOB? BECAUSE IF NOT, I CAN TAKE CARE OF THAT FOR YOU. YOU DON'T DESERVE YOUR FUCKING JOB IF YOU CAN'T FUCKING FIX THIS.

Every time your app crashes, even though I don't need to get your highest level boss on anymore for approval to restart your server, I'M GOING TO FUCKING CALL HIM AND MAKE HIM SEE THAT YOU'RE A FUCKING IDIOT. Eventually, he'll get so annoyed with me, your shit will be fixed. AND I WON'T HAVE TO DEAL WITH YOUR USELESS ASS ANYMORE.

(Rant directed at project manager more than dev. Don't know which is to blame, so blaming PM)

got a call from a recruiter for a job. said "wokey, let's see what you got to offer"
get to the interview, the first question is "why do you want to work in our company?"
me: i don't know, you called me!

When you don't know what to do :p

I don't know what to do I got hired by a adult video company. I will be maintaining sites you visit everyday.

Dad: “Hey son.. I have this new software called blablablu.."

Me: "yeah?.."

Dad: "well it's not working.. there's an error and it's not doing what I want.."

Me: "okay.. I don't know.. sorry.. I don't know that software.. I can't help you.."

Dad: "you're studying computer science... you should know what to do.."

You ****ing serious?! -.-

Today I Learned that the Hooli logo, from Silicon Valley, exists in the FontAwesome library.

I don't know what to do with this information.

Guy I just met: so what do you do?

Me: I'm a developer

Guy: no way! I work for a software company so... (goes on to talk for 10 minutes trying to show off his knowledge of software)

Me: so what do you do there?

Guy: sales

Me: oh...

Just because you work for a software company does not mean you know shit about software. Don't try to build some erroneous common ground with me because you walked by a developer's desk one time, looked at his or her screen, and magically thought you could understand code.

Today I found this sticker in the Microsoft merchandise shop.
Now I don't know what to do. I find this epic, but I don't really like Windows. 😥

Me a while ago talking to a recruiter over the phone. This was for a C++ dev position.

(R)ecruiter : So except for the development things, we are looking for someone who has experience configuration linux. Do you have any experience with that?

(M)e : Sure, I use Linux all the time. What do you mean.

R : Well, Just using Linux isn't enough for this position, you need to have experience in configuration Linux.

M : Well. I can't answer your question if you don't specify what you mean. Do you mean that I need to be able to install my own packages? Set up my dev environment? Bash scripting? Being able to configure my bash profile to have good aliases? Use Linux to develop software? Because I can do all of these.

M : Or do you need someone who can write Kernel modules for the OS, because I don't have any experience in that but would like to learn.

R : Oh, I don't really know what it means. But the paper says that you need to have experience configuration Linux. So what would you say your experience with that is?

Me internally : JESUS CHRIST I JUST TOLD YOU WHAT I KNOW AND WHAT I DON'T KNOW HOW ARE YOU GOING TO ASSESS ME CORRECTLY.

Me 😎 : I use Arch and you have to set it up completely from the ground by your self so I know everything there is to know.

Basically every question was like this with the recruiter. I got further in the process but quit because the workplace looked like it would drain my soul when I got interviewed by the employees of the company.

Jesus Christ though, some recruiters could be replaced by an automated phone system.

Me: Ok, so send me your logo.
Client: Here it is <template.xlsx>
Me: What I am supposed to do with a fucking animated gif in excel spreadsheet ?
Client: I don't know you are the IT guy
Me: OK go fuck yourself.

Is it expected for a new arrival to post a 'Hello World'? Only I don't normally do what's expected. Actually, I don't normally do normal. Then again, I don't know what I am doing most of the time. Or where I am. Or who I am.

Father: What is this? *hands me a box*
Me: 😯 *opens box*

The contents of the box: a white cube about an inch on each side, with a speaker on one side, a button on the other and three small holes.

Comes with a manual (square inch piece of plastic with a drawing) that shows you what the button does (turn it on, duh) and some indications as to what the various holes do.

Me: 😶 I have no clue... Maybe it's for taking calls? (though speaker mode does exist peeps)
Father: 😑What do you mean you don't know... Don't you know about stuff like this?

I love when my family assumes I am all knowing when it comes to anything running on electricity... Guys, just because I program I am not a psychic and am not better suited to fix your printer or fix your phone screens.

S = Some person I know
Me = Me

S: Hey, I heard you also do [software/web development].. I was hoping to get some advice from you about some advanced level HTML and CSS for my classes.
//or that if I could teach him something

Me: What do you study?

S: Oh, I teach.

Me: 😯 Really? What do you teach?

S: Oh, just some basic HTML and CSS with Notepad to about 50-60 students.

Me: (;﹏;) That's great.

/*this is a shortened version of a very long conversation*/

They teach some basic HTML and CSS like <table> and <marquee> and stuff. They also teach C++ and Tally ERP.

Also, he and some other person made their small intuitions' website but they don't know how to put it online. They made it in, as far as I understand, simple HTML and CSS USING NOTEPAD (Don't know if they used JS or something else). That's.. really courageous or something... ? I don't know, I couldn't have a look at it because they have it on their local computer and don't know what Git is.

I showed him some better alternatives and ways that they could use (editors, version control, db, etc.) to improve their curriculum and answered his questions, and I told him that I'll try to help in any way I can if they ever need me.

This also made me realize how much I've learned and grown since I first started learning C in school. Still, I've got so much more that I need and want to learn.
//Always keep learning
😊

PS. What would you've told him if you had been in my place?

When I worked as an IT student and was asked what we could do to ensure the destruction of data on old drives. I suggested lighting the office on fire while blindly firing guns into the inferno. To this day I don't know why they laughed.

This is a conversation my friend and I had.

Me: let me just delete this file
*rm -rf filename*

Frnd: what does the rf do?

Me: Don't know man I just do it coz the memes tell me to.

When you know what you need, but don't know how to do it and can't get your thoughts into words well enough to ask on stackoverflow.

Me: Boss, i am not qualified for this. This is something totally different that what i do.
Boss: Just do what you can.
* Me does something which seems to work*
-- A few months or even years later:
Boss: Our distributed systems don't longer work. What happened?
Me, after checking different system: Oh, there is a key that expired. I didn't know this key had an expire date. So they can no longer connect.

Turns out we have to visit every remote system (driving distance of a few 100's km) and set a new key. We couldn't do it remotely since we lost access.

Maybe, just maybe, when your employee says he isn't qualified for a task, listen and search someone that know what he is doing.

Me: So, tell me more about what you want me to code.
Friend: Well... Do something nice.
Me: Like?
Friend: I don't know, I thought you're the expert...
Me: You motherf...

Do you know what i hate most?

... commented old code!

What is the fucking purpose to comment old code IF YOU ARE USING A VERSION CONTROL SYSTEM?????

Commented old code is shit, because it fucks the readibility! I saw entire class full of this shit!

DELETE IT, YOU DON'T LOSE IT YOU MORON!!!!

End of year company party with 1200 employees. CEO is singing on stage with dinner buffet.
And I don't know what to do, with so many people. If i sit alone on a couch it is not ok. But sitting next to random strangers is also not ok. I hate such situations. How do you deal with this?

When you get to 12pm (lunch time) and you've already been in 7 back to back meetings and no longer know what you were going to actually attempt to do today.

Listen kids, don't become the senior dev, you'll never work an hour in your day again!

#iJustWantToFuckingCodeToday!

Well, I guess all the Linux folks are going to know what I am talking about. Do you know this feeling (Yes, you know. Don't tell me anything.) when you use Linux and nobody else uses Linux in your Work/School. And these people come to you and say.

Stupid people : Oh! You use Linux. That's bullshit!
Me : No it's not. It doesn't do 24/7 updates like Windows.
Stupid people : No, Linux is bullshit you don't have money for Windows. And Linux can't run professional Applications.

Unfortunately there is no medicine that cures dumbness. Just saying ...
I'd rather stay not dumb like these people instead of buying another Windows license.

Sales: "There is a problem in complicated feature A, in a client system!
Dev: "What is the problem"
Sales: "I don't know exactly"
Dev: "which client system? What version is installed?"
Sales: crickets.
Dev: "Do you a Jira ticket, or an email with more details?"
Sales: "It is urgent that we fix the problem ASAP!"
Dev: "what problem"
Sales: "The problem! I talked to the VP RnD, So he can make sure you are on it!"
Dev: "What exactly do you me to fix"
Sales: "The Problem!"

I installed ArchLinux on my smartphone thanks to termux, and now i kinda feel like a god, but don't know what to do.
I'm bored.

Hey guys I just installed Arch Linux and a desktop environment, I don't know what to do with my life now...

You know what I do when I get upset or depressed?

I put myself in bed. I guess some things from childhood don't change.

Having a tantrum? Time to go to bed.

When your specs simply won't run new code no matter what you do, non-conditioned (and unmodified) calls don't get called, and 2+2 somehow equals Q, you know it's time to give up and restart the simulation by going to bed.

Except it's early afternoon and the project deadline is tonight. 😔

Back to debugging reality.

Mom: what is it you do exactly?

Me: I make web sites and test computers for bugs.

Mom: What is a bug?

Me: it is when a program does something you do not want it to do.

Mom: k, I don't understand how money is made in that. But, you know (random store) is hiring.

Duuude!? What the fuck?!
First weekend off so I can slack around & now this?! O.o
I don't know what I expected.. I didn't evem do anything to it (yet)..

FUCK

Have you ever worked with people that constantly asks you what to do? People who are in the same spot as you, I mean.

- Hey, you should start debugging this while I finish this menu
+ So what's failing?
- I don't know man, but there's a bug
+ But where?
- You should look for it, I'm trying to link this to the controller
+ How can you not know?
- Do you know?
+ Where should I look for it? Here?
- ...
(One crappy solution after) + Here it is, I'm moving to something else
- ...

Pattern I'm noticing...

*email* Hey, can you help me with my code, I don't know why it's not working...*end email*

no comments. if you wrote the shit and don't know what the blazes it's doing, how am i supposed to know what you broke? I'm not a mind reader, I don't know what you were thinking when you wrote the code.

true, I could go through and read it and try to figure it out, but then i'll be cranky and much less likely to want to help you in the future because you're causing unnecessary work, and part of my job is to get you ready for work environments, and I WILL DO EVERYTHING IN MY FUCKING POWER TO MAKE YOU THE ONE PERSON THAT EVERYONE DOESN'T HATE, BUT I WILL HATE YOU FOREVER BECAUSE YOU'RE PISSING ME THE HELL OFF.

You guys wanna know why I rage so much at the 🤡🤡🤡's I work with?

I shit you not, this is a ticket in our "to do" section of our Jira.

what even is ticket linking??!?!?

what even are tickets??!?!?!

or better yet.... what even the fuck is jira?!?!?! I've only been using it for over a year, give me some time to figure out how to use it!!!!!!

I don't know, maybe i'm the asshole. But at least I don't feel like a 🤡

I've been teaching my brother basic front-end development stuff. He's good. Seeing this, I decided to put him into a real project. So I got one, a simple front-end project. But the project managers are assholes and requesting stupid things. Thus, my brother didn't complete it before deadline. I don't know what to do now. I can't help my brother because I don't have enough time. I am very furious as I want to leave the project and fuck the manager over. What should I do?

The other day a non-programmer colleague asked me:
"How do you know what to type in, like, did you write all of that?"
As I responded, he asked me another question; "but how do you know wuat to type".

I use to have those same thoughts years ago.

It occurred to me that through constant bugs, errors, bad (team) projects and failures that its become second nature, like breathing.

So, as an experienced developer to people just learning the craft and juniors. Don't give up on your collabs, don't be disheartened by group projects, don't be discouraged by your peers who seemingly try to make your life harder.

Take it as an experience to better yourself and teach them something.

These are the experiences that will make you a better developer.

Look what I got!
I don't know what do to with it, except for work related stuff.

The great thing about coding is, every problem can be solved with logic. And the simplest solution is often the best one.
Often when I don't know what to do, I just keep thinking about what I want to have and break down what I need for that and in the end I always come to a good solution. And it gets easier from time to time.

i kinda feel embarrassed all the time. i feel like it's never enough, i don't know enough, there's so much i don't know. i do enjoy my work and sometimes there are moments where i'm proud of what i've done, or these "i'm a fucking genious" moments when i solve a bug or a certain problem or when something finally works. but if i have to do something new, i tend to panic a bit, as long as i do not yet have a concrete solution in mind.
my perception contrasts with the feedback people give me, but even when i'm happy about the positive feedback, i tend to think to myself, "they're wrong, it's not that great"..

Windows, if you can't even do as much as mounting network shares *after* the network comes up, don't you fucking dare to tell me that I can't disable my firewall. Some people may actually know what they're doing and maintain that elsewhere, you know?

No, brain. I don't need to know Python.

Shut up, you already know Ruby, PHP, and a fuckton of front-end tech, you don't need to --

Do you remember the 3 projects that we aren't working on anymore because we have the PS4 and Assassin's Creed?

I already have a job, moron! It sounds fun, but we...

What am I doing on codecademy?

You know what irks me is whenever people ask me how to do something without Googling it first.

Like ffs whenever I Google the same issue because I don't know the answer either, it's literally the first fucking result. Like damn bruh.

I don't mind helping people at all, but please at least try to be an adult and Google the fucking question first.

What a lazy fuck.

This so called full-stack developer doesn't know how to use mysql from command line. The only way he can do anything in the database is using phpMyAdmin or MySQL gui.

What? How do you even call yourself a developer when you don't know how to use basic command line tools?

The fucker wants me to find out why a particular feature is not working?

Why the fuck are you being paid for? You stupid idiot.

"Can you please grep ... in the server?"

What? Why would I do that for you? How about you ssh the server yourself?

What a waste of time.

The website of the italian post service is "closed" between 23:45 and 00:15, everyday.
I don't know if something like this happens in other countries...

And do you know when I really need to access it?
ALWAYS IN THESE 30 MINUTES, not the others 1.410 of the day!

P.S.
What do you think, what could be a valid reason to "close" a web service?
I thought about backup, but other services don't have this problem.

This is what I love about fellow devs - they know what's best, you don't need to ask something like "please keep adding xyz to your post so we can see if it...". We just do it. :3

Just got AWS free subscription, had fun for 30 mins. Now I don't know what to do with it. Can someone give me idea for something to do with it.

Look what I found!
I don't know what to do with it.
:/

Recently in a project of mine people started to raise tons of issues and suggesting fixes "just slap this module on it", "just do this", "just do that". And no respect for the project whatsoever. Code contributions? Don't even think about it.

The users raising these do not know what language the project is written in, they do not know whether it supports modules at all (let alone that particular one), and they have no idea whatsoever what the code is like, or how this suggestion 99% of the time would not at all integrate with the overall structure of the project. And aside from all that, don't fucking tell me what to do with my project!

My question is, how do you deal with these people? All I can think of is "wontfix™️" or even "cantfix™️" in some cases. Given that this is an endless slew of users, anything long-term?

At the end of each day, work out exactly what you need to do next, and then...

...don't do it. Seriously. Make a note of it, save it, then walk away. Then you know *exactly* what you're getting started with the next day, and by the time you've done that you're in the swing of things. (Especially helpful if you're not a morning person like me. Much, much easier to get started if you know exactly what you're doing.)

Jesus Christ on a crutch!
You don't fucking use try and excepts everywhere in place of actual logic! For once in your Goddamn miserable life, I need you to actually think through what you're doing instead of mindlessly typing code away at your computer, you fucking King Shit of Turd Mountain!

DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY EVERYTHING KEEPS BREAKING!?

BECAUSE YOU'RE FUCKING REFERENCING VARIABLES BEFORE THEY'RE ASSIGNED, AND THEN WRAPPING IT UP IN A TRY AND EXCEPT! YOU DON'T FUCKING DO THAT! Think through what you're doing!!!!

The shit you're pulling off here is as useful as a chocolate teapot!

Me: So... do you want a website, right?
Client: Yes!
Me: ...but you don't know how it should look, right?
Client: Ehm... correct.
Me: ...and you don't even know what color should I use?
Client: Exactly!
Me: ...and of course you can't link me a website you like which I can base on.
So now I have to invent something randomly that somehow will be the exact same thing you would like to see. Nice.

Does anyone else suffer from a lack of direction at work? It really kills motivation and velocity

Professor: "I've been using java for many, many years and know close to everything."

Student: "How do I compile my code on the unix server?"

Professor: "uhh.... I don't know."

Let's start hiring people who actually know what they're doing.

Fucking hate when business people says this to me:
- You have no time to do this, we will find somebody else to do it. (EXCUSE ME? how do you know I have no time? If have no time I WILL TELL YOU)
- Your team is too busy, we will outsource that (IF THAT it's a priority, we WILL DO THAT, fuck you, I'll tell you if we need to outsource or not)
- Requirements are too complex to do now. We will think about it and we will tell you, maybe it's just enough to add a column to db (WHAT? WHAT THE FUCK IS too complex? I didn't even see anything we can call requirement, nor speak with relevant people, so how do you fucking know they are complex if you don't know shit about dev and our platform)

Conclusion
It's true, I have no time, because I don't fucking understand what do you want, so I'm running all day and night doing useless things.

Me: man, I really want to work on my project but I don't know what to do

Brain: You should document your code, it doesn't have a single fucking comment, you stupid lazy fuck

Me: oh ok, I will do that ...

Hello everyone.

I'm switching phones from Android to iPhone. Mostly because of stronger security policies, longer support for security updates and whatnot.

I would like to know what useful iOS apps you use. Does not have to be dev related. Just hit me with your best shot.

I know that there will be people screaming MUH ANDROID. I don't really care. You do you.

I can't get work done. I completely lack motivation. Don't know what to do anymore :/

Hello fellow people,

though I'm normally just a lurker, I want to take some time to make some new years resolutions I probably won't follow after a few days, but I do have some small goals I hopefully can achieve.

1. Hopefully not regretting to post this. I get kind of anxious when I think about someone I know could see this. I'm fairly new to this site, so I really don't know what's going to face me.

2. Getting my mental health on the right track.
I could do so much more if I wouldn't be as... occupied with uncomfortable thoughts as of right now, such as feeling as if I am not able to do what I want to do because I'll never achieve anything so why even trying... I want to change that, because I'd be more able to do things I want to do; to have more energy for uni because that's what I originally wanted to do. study computer science because it was and probably is still fun to me. finding the motivation I've had a few months ago.

3. With that follows... trying new things; starting a project and hopefully finishing it.

I don't know. I normally don't do these kind of new years resolution things, but I took this small opportunity, even if it is just for me, to write it down.
Here's to... another chaotic year, as always. But better chaos. I don't know... why am I doing this? This page wasn't meant for this or was it? I'm confused now. I'm sorry if this bothered anyone ^^'

you wanna know what the most hilarious shit is? hackernews users AKA the 6 figure startup bros that "rule the world" in terms of code and software...

trying to argue the best way to build a website 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

here's some select quotes:

"I believe the most minimalistic and productive way is to just use php"

^ this guy must not know its 2023 now

"Unless you are a web developer I don't see the point of a CSS framework, it's much easier to roll your own."

^ this guy must not know the pain and suffering that is 'rolling your own' in CSS

"Sadly, I just don't have the time to generate the content I wanted to do, so the site sits."

^ this guy just... wait, what?

but you know what? these guys clearly know WAY more than me in terms of software, it's good they get infinite salad bar and prime rib every day at silicon valley's best and brightest!

please fucking kill me i want it to end

You know what I don't like?
Getting dropped into an ongoing project, especially as a replacement for somebody else - looking through the code and realising the code is perfectly fine - except I would do it differently.
Yes, I see why those choices were made. It's up to specs and according to the convention - but it still _feels_ wrong.

(Call from a distant family member I know by name only)
Him: Hey, blah it's been awhile blah hey so I have this problem with my printer and...
Him: What do you mean you don't know about printers, can I bring it to your hou...<*click*>

Kotlin makes the development experience so much better. Humans are creatures of habit. Some don't want to change what they already know. RIP to those who still start their project in Java and do not want to adapt in this competitive world. :/

!rant
If you don't even know what MySQL is, fuck off and let me do my job. Don't insist that you can't find the solution to the problem. That's why I'm here. Your incompetence and persistence are slowing me down and if you really want your stuff to be done on time, don't even dip your fingers into my codes. I know you may think that I need help, but your help is useless if you have zero knowledge and can't even understand the solutions given in stack overflow. I'm fine doing this on my own, so fuck off. Just. fuck. off.

Okay so this Is my first actual rant before its been questions or experiences but today has been really stressful. So one of my last posts I talked about how I don't know when to use what syntax whenever and I've been practicing but every fucking time I try to start something I can't fucking get it I don't even know how to start and yeah I planned it out and Im not getting anywhere I can't this is something I wanna do for the rest of my life and I can't even manage to make simple shit its like what the living fuck. Then then I tell my friend who's also in my class who programs what I'm trying to do AND HE DOES IT IN LIKE A MINUTE OR LESS AND IT WORKS AND ITS REALLY FUCKING STUPID BECAUSE I TRY AND STUDY SO HARD AND I CAN'T GET IT NO MATTER WHAT I DO I JUST CAN'T AND IT SUCKS SO FUCKING MUCH I HATE IT I JUST WANNA BE ABLE TO UNDERSTAND HOW I CAN PUT THIS WITH THIS TO DO THIS AND ITS DEPRESSING ME SO MUCH I JUST WANT TO BE GOOD

Long time no rant from me. Sorry guys, has been a tough time for me.

Little background: I'm an apprentice and as such definitely not a fully trained professional. I'm working in a big company with people who have very let's say interesting ideas what I should be able to do.

This whole disaster begins shortly after I started my apprenticeship. I was offered to choose my first little project. "Something from the backlog, not very challenging and a nice beginner one. It's just about a PoC" ok, le me thinks. I choose to make a weather display.
Basic functionality was provided within the next 3 weeks. My direct boss (let's call him Jo) liked it and talked to his boss (Hugo) about it. Hugo was so excited he called our product manager to get my plugin into our software asap and began to think about where else we could use this.
This is where shit went downhill. Hugo told me it was my task to implement it on a totally different platform and to "host it in azure". I don't know much about azure and I never used it. I told him that I'd need time and some kind of sandbox to try and learn how things work. He promised but nothing ever came through. Not even Jo could do something about this.
They told me I should write this asap because "every customer would LOOOOVE this" and I honestly can't think of a way to meet all their requirements without access to our azure system/ sandbox. (There are a lot of requirements)
Am I wrong? Should I be able to do this? I'm a fucking trainee. I don't know everything.

I have been hacked with cross-site request forgery and I don't know what to do. I have been up all night trying to fix.

Recently (last 6 month) I am getting a feeling like I don't know what to do in my life. I don't have any short and long term plan for my life. No ambition and no will power to do anything. procrastinating all task and doing them when there is no time.

Recently I was offered equity in my company and I don't know if I want that. I don't have any answer to any question in my life.

Does anyone know what to do?

I have ADHD. If you don't know what that means, for me it makes me a better software engineer. I can't do repetitive, so my code is by definition DRY. If someone needs help, I'll notice and help because my brain can't filter out the emotion of someone struggling. I fixate on problems I don't know how to solve, I literally struggle to stop myself. The list goes on. But, at its heart, who gives a shit?

I'm a software engineer, and I'm good at what I do. Does anything else matter?

what an absolute condescending garbage post...

"brilliant coder who can't meet a deadline"? well, you're the idiot right there, you just admitted it - they are brilliant and you don't know how to set deadlines

imagine labeling someone who can't meet a workload DIFFICULT! god this is making me fucking fume

"normal management" - yeah this is normal management alright, treating everyone like they don't know what they are doing and expecting them to follow you blindly, sounds pretty normal to me

it's shit like this that leads to cocky ass young dumb managers who actually don't know shit about building a product themselves, but then turn around and think they instead have the ability to manage a team to do it... incredible

Long time no rant.

Rant::beginRant();

How do people who are, I think, supposed to have a knowledge of what the fuck they're doing, keep their work without knowing what the fuck they're doing?
You're telling me that you have been hired as a "full-stack developer", yet you can't build a motherfucking Vue page over SSH (not even talking about automated deployment, just the most bare bones approach)? You don't know how to deploy a Laravel project? You don't know that Linux server paths are case sensitive? You can't read the log files?!

Rant::commitRant();

WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK. What is this dude talking about?! What am I doing with my life?!?!
Test what? What do I have to do? I didn't study this. I don't know what this API thing is. My life sucks. My job sucks. I suck. I'm stupid, because apparently knowing who or what this API is is essential for being a normal part of society.
I don't even.. oh someone pls kill me.
(No I don't want a detailed explanation what I have to do - I know this is not google and i wont understand it anyways and my husband will torture me with it in the afternoon. Just some sympathy for a finance person who has to deal with this would be nice)

So...you downloaded a new keyboard you can't get it out of the second person. You don't know what to do. Help you, please.

I'm pretty sure my browser is always open when I'm using my linux machine because I always don't know how to do what I really want to do.

Feeling so dumb right know.
I have a C# exam tomorrow (on paper) and i can't get my brain to think in code.
I can't focus, I can't concentrate. I don't remember things i normally know by heart. Is it just stress? (Everything is pretty hard atm, lots of stress, lots of problems).
What could i do? I'm pretty messed up right now...

Me:To my new boss I think its fare we adopt version control for the project we working on.
Boss: No need just do what we hired you for.
Me:Its my second day of work and don't know how this will play out

Am beginning to dislike this boss he still sticks to old practices

Hello !

I'm a fresh school dropout (against my will) without any diploma. I've learned programming from self teaching since three years; mostly doing web and apps development with golang, and c#.

I've already done some small projects, helped a lot of people with code, do some freelance and I'm now trying to build a SAAS.

I don't know what I'm supposed to do now, I'm completely lost for my future. What would you do if you were in this situation ?

Best way to learn dev tech is to choose the thickest book on the field and start reading it. Don't lose your time on blogs comparing what is the best framework If you do not know any of them... Select one and full blast!!!

I don't know if some people are incompetent or just simply dumb.
If you're not sure what to do, ask.
If every guideline for each workflow has been uploaded, read and watch.

Don't wait until the very last minute.
Don't even act innocent when I ask and you don't even know wtf I'm talking about.
Don't "disappear" and come back when the deadline is in few days.

Just stop torturing me with your horrible work ethics.

Ever have one of those days where you're just:

"Man i don't want to get into THAT right now, don't know why but I just don't...."

Then a task jumps out at you.

"Oh shit that, yeah I want to do that!"

I don't know what the difference is but sometimes one task seems more motivating for no reason at all.

As a rookie programming, I wrote really bad code and didn't understand why. Now, I've improved to where I know bad code, but I continue writing studios horrible solutions. And in the end up refactoring much until I don't have energy to look at my code anymore. This although knowing what I should/shouldn't do. Shame!

Manager: Tell me what you are looking for in your job, I know this from your coworkers, but not you.
Me: I honestly don't know anymore. After all this time my motivation is gone and I don't know where I'm going.
Manager: If you could go back to school knowing all you know now, what would you do?
Me:...
Me: I don't know.
Manager: maybe try to think about that.

He doesn't realize I've been thinking about this for years.
I stopped caring at some point and just act.
I didn't tell him I was looking for a new job because any energy I had left is being consumed by this company.

I don't know what to say.
.
.
.
Yes I do, just some clarification: not my code.

I don't know what I would do if the person who owns the internet decides to turn off the internet forever. I would probably go insane trying to figure out what happened to the internet as I have no way to read about why he did it.

so I work at a mid size agency as full stack dev, the only one, at almost 1 year and just found out that my boss is trying to sell wix websites to clients LOL
I don't know what the hell is he trying to do...

Rant

Arg! Stack overflow why are you so full of argumentative dumb wits. I post serious question for a serious answer and what do I get? People who apparently know my situation better than me and have decided what I want to be done shouldn't be done. They don't even know what I am making. Either answer the question or move on!!!

Some people just don't get it. When you meet friends who are either non technical or very new to programming, all they ask you is what language do you use.

The language is important but not everything. It's what you do with it that matters. Just because you know python, doesn't mean that you can do machine learning. Even simply asking what do I do is better than that!

The language is just a tool! Learn to be language agnostic please. Be a programmer, not a code monkey

Hey guys and girls,

follow up rant on my apprenticeship situation. I talked to Jo (my trainer). I told him I need more supervision and either someone who teaches me the stuff I need to know to meet the requirements from Hugo (my department mananger) or some further education. Because otherwise I'm not able to write producion ready code. (Keep in mind: I'm a fucking trainee who started their apprenticeship 6 months ago!)
Jo is more than happy to help me and make sure I'll get everything i need. Sadly he has to speak with Hugo and get his ok.
Hugo thinks 2 das of school/week is enough training. (Regardless of the fact that we don't even learn the same languages there we use in our projects.) I told him that way I won't be able to finish my projects.
I hope he reconsiders. How should I learn if nobody's there to teach me? (My collegues are to occupied fixing bugs and implementing new features/ don't know the languages either.)

If Hugo keeps this mindset I have to contact the IHK (a german institution which keeps an eye on apprenticeships).

Ya know when you're working on a personal project, and you add a feature thinking it's a really good idea, then you don't touch the code for 6 months and it's still a good idea but you've got no idea what's broken and no idea what you need to do next?

I only finished my CS degree last year but while I was a student and after I got my degree I went for a few interviews and none of the companies really asked me what degree I have or didn't ask at all, some just asked what I was studying. All of the companies asked what I can do and what my skills are. If I can do it, they were happy to hire me even if I didn't have a degree.

So to answer the question, a degree is not useful if you still don't know how to program (for example) or if you don't know your field well. If you are good at what you do, you will earn crazy money with or without a degree.

I know a few people that don't have a CS degree but their programming skills are crazy good...probably much better than a uni graduate with a CS degree.

Hi friends.
I'm 19 years old programmer and working already. My father is 47 years old. He don't know anything about programming yet. When he was young he was good in math.
Today when I came home he said that he would like to learn programming too and help me to do some projects in the future. I know it's kind of late for him to start learning something new, but what do you think, what can I do to help him start programming? What's the startpoint for 47 years old man in the world of programming.
P.S. He tried to learn Java watching online tutorials but couldn't understand anything.

I'm worried about me, and my future carrier path...
I don't know in what direction should I walk, to become the best as I can
And I'm going to be as best as I can...but Google Maps doesn't just show the direction, it gets lost as me...eh...
Yesterday, I've told to dev genie just 2 wishes, but as my third wish, I'd like to know in what direction should I walk, which roads should I avoid, what shall I do.

"Please move the logo left. The text goes a bit under."

Do you guys think people realize how unclear they are, and are just too fucking lazy to write the full spec? Or are they just so fucking stupid they don't realize I literally have no fucking clue what to do exactly with comments like these?

I guess Hanlon's razor applies here, but some days I just don't know...

Happy Friday! ☠️

To that nasty animation bug I’m dealing with for a week already...

I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom I can tell you I don't have money, but what I do have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for bugs like you. If you let my project go now that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you, but if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you and I will kill you.

Deciding whether to stick to being a web developer, or switch to something else

(thinking more like rocket software, or something with security (but maybe sticking with web), or some other cool sh#t

I don't know yet, what I do know is even when I'm creating an erp system, I find it very unsatisfying

"I helped create the software on that rocket"
Or
"that hospital uses the system I've helped to create"

Sounds a lot more satisfying than,
"that company uses my 'warehouse resources manager'/'webshop'/'planning system'

But then again I don't know, I now have a stable job, know what to do and know the language we use.

TLDR: dealing with other people is stressful

I hate having to explain things to people and then they still don't listen.

Especially if they know nothing about the topic.... I guess like those little kids that ask Why? all the time.

Can't you see I have other things to deal with, just do what I say because unlike you I already tried ... Or just know what I'm talking about....

Does anyone have a true measure to recruit freshly graduated? yesterday I had a technical interview with a candidate, the problem is he didn't know even the basic of coding in Java, like String equality and hashcode, he also didn't have a solid understanding of basic design pattern. But what made me want to give him a chance is that he seemed highly motivated and eager to learn. So I don't know what to do guys?

Don't know if already asked but, what brought you to programming /your work area. Do you like it? Was what you expected?

Oh no it's happening to me too... Gave up so many hobbies/interests to focus on my career. Now I have almost no interest in side projects because I don't know what to build. (I mean something actually useful not a to-do list.) I love my job, but is this the path to burnout?

Does anyone else have those little bouts of creativity and interest where you work on a project of your own 24/7, and then when you finish it you don't know what to do for the next however long?

got first assignment on my first meet on Network Security. it require to pentest one unsecured specified website. yet they don't tell me shit about anything just try it.
i need to :
1. Footprint
2. Scanning
3. Enumeration
4. Gaining Access (previledges raising?) (bonus)

suppose : <target-website> is x
i've done this:
1. whois x
2. got the ipaddress via :
host x
3. nmap -F ip.of.x

my head is already spinning, i need to know what BASICLY each of what i've done. i only get that 'whois' get the information about that domain, 'host' is used to know the target ip address and nmap to find what are the open ports. i don't know what else should i do. need help :(

I got a question at an interview today asking what type of developer do you want to be and what's your long term technical goal. Right now I'm a senior software engineer at a pretty well known solid mid sized tech company. I work across the stack but I really don't know what type of developer I want to be.

Which way technically are you directing your engineering career? How and why did you decide this is the type of work you want to do?

Random variation of how we learn based off a colleague.

1. I dont know what the fuck to do, i dont know what the fuck is going on
2. I don't know what the fuck to do, i know whats going on
3. I know whats going on, i know what to do
4. I know what to do, i dont know what the fuck is going on

Haha, i love my job, the place where devs play solitair with their Trello cards

You're working on a project, your boss has set you tasks to complete. You complete all the tasks and make pull requests of all the work you've done. Your boss is busy and you don't know what to do next? What do you do? Is it unethical to work on personal projects in work hours, because you're not being paid for that? How do you find other stuff to do?

Everyone talks about quality, but they don't know what it means/ don't want to invest the time to do things right.

When you are bored and you don't know what to do :D. Starts an SSH Connection in your Private Home Server to change the settings of all installed Service

So this group of students (mostly girls) from university approached us to make them a prototype app for their semester's project, we had a first reunion to know about the idea and what they wanted us to do.

All they talked about was the color and some minor design stuff, we still don't exactly know what we're doing since it was difficult for us to get them to actually define the requirements and what the app should do.

We were supposed to have a second reunion for us to show them some ideas but the day of the meeting they didn't reply any of our messages.

I'm not the kind of guy who gets upset easily, but if you ask us for help and then let us hanging not really knowing what to do with your shitty project, fuck you.

No motivation these days to do any work from home. All I want to do is watch Youtube/Netflix/Hulu or play Valorant (fps shooter). I don't know if I'm just addicted to games again or if my motivation so low I just don't want to look at work. It all kicked off when 3 of the tickets I finished and got merged to develop were reopened by my QA person for obscure issues, then my PM decided to throw 3 extra tickets in mid sprint, and I just said "fuck it" and started playing games instead.

I don't know what to do. In the over year I've been at my company I've never done or felt this way while in the office. I've always got stuff done, but now working from home I feel very shitty.

!rant

I went out tonight. Before I knew it, all the songs being played were far beyond my youth, and I'm now sitting outside smoking cigarettes. Is this normal adulthood?

Interns have degree's in 'Computer Science'.
I do not, Just a microsoft crash course on C# and SQL.
They are 3 - 4 years older than i am, yet they don't know how to use CSS.
I wonder what they learnt in that 4 years?

What do you do when you don't have any assigned work in office and idle for 2 weeks..?
I'm already frustrated. And I don't know to pretend I'm working infront of manager 😁

I get it you don't know anything. You are not paying me to be your teacher.

Let me do my job!

At what point can we stop explaining ourselves and every little detail of the job.

I really want to build a raspberry pi cluster but I don't know what to do with it...
Has anyone of you ever built a raspi cluster?
What could I do with it?

I might get a domain, but I can't buy it if I don't know what to do with it. any ideas???

I have a question for you guys. What level of education tends to be required to get a good dev job?

I've seen some people say bachelor's degree, I've seen some people say it doesn't matter much. I really don't fucking know. I'm in my senior year of high school and I need to know what exactly I'm gonna fucking do with my life.

I want to build a home automation bot but I don't know what kind of features to give it. I have hue lights and I want a smart speaker/google home mini. Do you guys have ideas? I'm open for everything.

Trying to use authenticate a JWT token from an Azure service, which apparently needs to use Azure AD Identity services (Microsoft Entra ID, Azure AD B2C, pick your poison). I sent a request to our Azure admin. Two days later, I follow up, "Sorry, I forgot...here you go..."
Sends me a (small) screenshot of the some of the properties+GUIDs I need, hoping I don't mess up, still missing a few values.
Me: "I need the instance url, domain, and client secret."
<hour later>
T: "Sorry, I don't understand what those are."
Me: "The login URL. I assume it's the default, but I can't see what you see. Any shot you can give me at least read permissions so I can see the various properties without having to bother you?"
T: "I don't see any URLs, I'll send you the config json, the values you need should be in there."
<10 minutes later, I get a json file, nothing I needed>
<find screenshots of what I'm looking for, send em to T>
Me: "The Endpoints, what URLs do you see when you click Endpoints?"
<20 minutes later, sends me the list of endpoints, exactly what I'm looking for, but still not authenticating the JWT>
Me: "Still not working. Not getting an error, just that the authentication is failing. Don't know if it's the JWT, am I missing a slash, or what. Any way I can get at least read permissions so I don't have to keep bugging you to see certain values?"
T: "What do you need, exactly?"
Me: "I don't know. I don't know if I'm using the right secret key, I can't verify if I'm using the right client id. I feel like I'm guessing trying to make this work."
T: "What exactly are you trying to get working?"
<explain, again, what I'm trying to do>
T: "That's probably not going to work. We don't allow AD authentication from the outside world."
Me: "Yes we do. Microsoft Teams, Outlook, the remote access services. I can log into those services from home using my AD credentials."
T: "Oh yea, I guess we do. I meant what you are trying to do. Azure doesn't allow outside services to authenticate using a JWT. Sorry."

FRACK FRACK FRACK!!

Whew! Putting the flamethrower away.

Thanks devrant for letting me rant.

Right after breaking my camera lens, my brother again broke my precious favorite mouse. I don't know what to do about it. After all, he is my brother.

Trying to review the architecture of an internal boilerplate... After having explained Atomic design principles, and the "component approach" to my colleague, he still managed to come back to me with:

- plugin/
- module/
- components/ ....

in his architecture... I don't know what to do. I'm depressed. FML. I'm quitting.

Ok. FUCK THIS SHIT.

It's been like literally 15 minutes and I've been struggling, trying to *do* something at all.

I don't know why or how my experience with firefox has just plumetted through the floor. I partially blamed my slow ass HDD but guess what, chrome ran beautifully last I checked.

I don't want to start any wars in the comments, but what do you devs prefer: iOS or Android?

I'm not saying one is better. I'm just genuinely curious what other devs use. I prefer to use Android because I can do more with my phone.

I'm actually curious what most of you use, so feel free to tag other ranters you know in the comments. I've already commented the few I could come up with off the top of my head.

The only thing we can do is make a joke about the other bots that are not always in their own mind or if it's just an issue for them and then the other one ☝️ and then you don't get them in your mail to the right place for a long list of all that people you know you are not so far out and it's a joke that is why you haven't even paid for it and it's a lot easier for them but it's just like 👍 is not just the way of things like 👍 is the one ☝️ you don't have it on it but you can't even get the word for that one ☝️ or something that's what it looks it up 🆙 is it a lot better then it's not the one ☝️ thing that you don't have it on it or so you know it looks bad it's a joke it's a bad joke and you can't find a way you don't have a lot to me but I don't know 🤷‍♂️ or you want me to be like 👍 but you do not have any more than me I don't know 🤷‍♂️ but that's what I'm talking you know that I'm going through the whole time I'm going through the wrong 😑 thing I've been to you to see if this one ☝️ or I just want you to do something like 👍

Sometimes code behaves weird !!.

Spent all night trying to get something to work but now it works weirdly and I honestly don't know what to do anymore as it's not the type of thing you would be able to explain on tack overflow.

Time to sleep 5:51 AM

-Week before final project presentation.
Classmate: Dude, can you help me for our project? Its website.

Me: Sure, what you used?

Classmate: ASP. NET

Me: Ok....I don't know much about it but let me see.

Classmate: No, I just want your help with flowchart, sequence diagram and use case diagram.

Me: ..................
*in mind: how the fuck m supposed to do that shit I don't even know much about your website*

(still I drew few basic flowcharts for them)

Rant!
What ryms my gears seeing those posts on LinkedIn:
1. What startups need to do to become the next billion dollars corporate
2. App ideas that will sell in millions
3. What every wannabe needs to know to become the best entrepreneur

I honestly don't recall adding other than devs and HRs 😒

I just failed the same maths module for the second time
At this point after working really hard and even getting a private tutor I really think I'm not cut out for this shit.I just don't know what to do right now.

Last day of my internship and I'm the only one in the office... most people have off or are in meetings and my manager is coming in late. My summer project is done... I don't know what to do with myself

Won an Amazon Echo Show in a Hackathon where we spent most of the time integrating with Google Home.

I don't know what to do with the thing. 🤔

I accidentally factory resetted my HP48... FUCK, FUCK, FUCK, FUCK!!! 10 years or hard work... Completely gone... I don't know what to do with myself now...

Errh... I'm sick as fuck, just the day when we should begin the C++ inheritance. I stay at home today so that's good but I would like to work on the C++ concepts, I don't want to be late...

Anyway, I can do the exercises at home but like I said, I'm sick as fuck so, I don't know what I should do : rest or work?

For some reason, my roommate thinks Facebook can track his and all our calls.

I don't know the beginning or the end of what they can/can't do, but that just has to be BS... right?

I don't know if it's only me or if anyone have experienced that sometimes, when my code is not doing what I expected it to do, then I add a log.d to debug what's happening.Then.. It magically fix the program, without me fixing it...Weird

Hold a meeting that the participants actually want.

The biggest time wasters I had to attend were:
- "generic weekly meet up of people not working together telling what's new on their side" (I don't work with you, I DON'T CARE)
- "management wants updates/wants to talk about doing instead of letting us do" (go read Jira tickets, and ffs stay out of the experts' field... They're experts in it for a reason)
- "no agenda, this is just to get to know each other" (I get to know people on my own terms, stop forcing what can't be forced)
- most Scrum meetings (some people need guidance, I don't! Your Scrum chains actually hinder my productivity! Can we please stop wasting my time and nerves?)

And the best meetings? A couple of coworkers realizing "hey we need to make a decision here, let's book a conference room together" and "hey you know your stuff about xyz, can you teach us what you know?".

I just graduated and now I don't know what the fuck to do with my life

You know these people who want your support but do everything they could possibly do to prevent you from helping them?!

This one is about text-based support.

Basically, I told them to use a software. One guy said: "There is always an error right in the beginning when I start the app."
I ask: "What does it say?"
Another dude joins: "Yes, I get the same. Update fails or something..."
I ask: "What's the exact error message?"
Second guy: "Retrieving update failed or something similar..."

*whaaa, guess what: this is by no fucking way what I meant with "exact error message"*

Well, I ask nicely to look it up again and tell me the details.
Then, I suggest a possible solution for this abstract problem. Answer:
"No, it only happens at start."

What the fuck do you think I am? A stupid monkey who cannot read?! I know that it happens at start, that's why I suggested what I suggested! And don't think you're so intelligent to believe that deleting an update.exe in %appdata% had nothing to do with your problem. You don't have a single fucking clue how software works in its simplest manner.

What the fuck.

Nothing like client requesting "Hey can you add a virus scan for every goddamn file in the pipeline ? (We don't know what antivirus software you can use, neither do we know what are the consequences of this virus scan failing. We also don't know why a system admin is not doing this server wide instead of a software Dev doing it for this specific individual component. Heck we don't even know why do we need the virus scan in the first place) You might need to think 'outside the box'. Let's hope this is done by 12th Jan. Regards" on a Friday goddamn night

They probably even expect me to write my own antivirus software instead of paying for one

Why is industry like this ? Is there really any polite way to deny this ?

To everyone on here thinking about switching to Linux: don't be afraid. I dual-booted it with windows when I was 12 without any help, without any problems occurring during the installation whatsoever. As long as you know what you're doing and you do research, you'll be fine.

Some logic I'm developing packs three different states into an f32: NaN means do nothing, +0.0 or positive number means polite request and -0.0 or negative number means force override

Yeah, I don't know what to say...

Me: finally we have automated deployment to production
Team Lead: No production deployment still requires manual approval
Me: ok how do you want to handle it slack, webhook, what do you suggest
Team Lead: let's do a proof of concept (POC) for this
Me: Ahh... Poc for this ?
Team Lead: you don't know sh*t ?
Me: well I know you're are creating that here

Next day team change...

10 Months ago i started with webdev. Before i never program at all, but i Fall in love. The only thing i hate about webdev is this.

dude:look at my Website?
me: how did you do this?
dude: i used 900000 frameworks. it was really easy.
me: ...

I know.. you don't need to reinvent the wheel, but if don't think about what actually happens, where is the fun??

i don't know if it is also the case in Software dev but i don't like the way it evolves

Is it me or do you also get put on numerous projects simultaneously?

I don't know why companies do this. To save money, probably. What were they thinking? It's not efficient to put a developer on several different projects at once, much less projects that are not in their field.

What do you get when you put an employee on 5-10 different projects simultaneously? A nerve-wracked, stressed out, easily-burnt-out employee. I've seen it myself.

Mine actually don't know shit about what I do but they don't try to describe it either. One day I told my father that as a personal project I was making a little script to fetch song lyrics and assign them to the music files I have in my library. Well he was all surprised like "Wow, and you can do that sort of thing?". Well, yeah, what do you think I've been studying during all those years? 😁

Ok, so we know you've not had any work to do for a week. Here's what we'll do - pick up this task to copy & paste shit code from one project to another. Don't worry yourself with what it does.

FMDL

So it's Valentine's day here in the states.
I don't know what to do for my GiF.
All I did was rm -rf objects around the apartment and she seemed pleased...Am I doing this relationship thing right?

Until now, I've never contributed anything to an open source project (or even created my own). My GitHub Profile is completely empty. I don't know why, maybe I'm just to "scared" of bad feedback.

But I really want to change that. Any good advice on how to do so? What were your first steps in this world?

Ok I don't know very much about what goes into developing a whole os, but I find it hard to imagine how you can fuck something up so badly like the win10 creators update. When suddenly the explorer and the menus don't have text displayed and you have to guess which one is the right folder. Do they even have testing?

I wonder if anyone ( especially a highly experienced engineer ) can tell me what kind of pull requests are rude or inappropriate to do.

I saw some newbie do small fixes in docs or readme folies or some just add unnecessary lines of codes and then do a PR.

I don't know whether these are rude ones or I am thinking about it the wrong way ...
I've also attached an example ...

How do you find open source projects you want to contribute to? I'm trying to find projects I'm interested in but don't really know what to do.

Hi devRant community,

First of all, I'm so grateful and thankful for being part
of this awesome community. CHEERS!

I just wanna ask some advices from my super kind and awesome
pile of developers, what is the best thing to do if you're
stucked between creating a certain feature and a raging
girlfriend. I mean, my head is aching. I don't know what to do.
She needs time, but my first love which is programming also
needs much more of my time.

#devRantRocks

You know what really rustles my jimmies, the fact that a lot of people (especially older people) disregard your profession or refuse to talk about because "i dont understand dem computers" so they generally have no idea what you're actually doing and you cannot give an explanation.

Ffs, I don't really understand chemistry but I would still like to know what you do at work/school and maybe even learn sonething. There is no fucking reason for why this also shouldnt apply for IT.

Disclaimer: I should know what I'm doing but I don't. 😢

I'm a very experienced full stack dev (15+ years), but I don't know the more modern JS frameworks. I'm trying to learn React and I have a little project I'd like to do.

I have database (in both SQLite form and JSON form). I'd like to read from it, parse it and run various displays in a shared hosting environment (that doesn't have node). So webpack. And either an API to get the data or a React compatible SQL component.

But dagnamit, I cannot find a tutorial or example with this kind of set up and I can't figure it out. What packages do I need and what kind of config?

I genuinely thought this would be a traditional and simple architecture but I'm obviously mistaken. And I'm about to turn in my developer card because I'm clearly a stupid twonk.

Has anyone done this? Do you know of any tutorials or examples of this kind of thing? Is there somewhere else I should ask this question? Thanks anyway...

I don't know but, I want to buy a Raspberry Pi. I quite good at programming and want to learn a few hardware tricks.
Not expecting much from it but I guess I can program (play) with it.

What can I do with a raspberry pi that I can't do with my laptop already??

!dev
I usually don't get attached to the company I work for. Rather I'm more attached to the work what I do.

But I don't know what happened to me today! When I resigned from my company, somewhere deep down, I felt bad! 😥

I don't usually tell my extended family that I work remotely but when I do, I have to explain what I do, how I do it and how did I get it.

Working remotely is very rare where I'm from. I only know one other guy does work remotely and thats it.

I really don't know what to do with those projects which I started confidently but then left when it was about to finish because I lost motivation

Ok It's my last term in CS and guess what I have the knowledge as same as some one in high school i rly don't know what to do nAw any suggestions

!rant

So my friend has this idea. I don't know much about it, but from what I do know, it sounds pretty cool and I want to know what you all think.

Basically, it's an ide on the web, that has integration for multiple languages. He wants it to make codeling quicker and more accessible, and it would also allow the poor students who have to deal with shitty school chromebooks to code.

What to do when you think your boss sucks at a language they're developing in, but everyone assumes they are awesome because they don't know that language, and you're stuck as the junior fixing their code?

I don't really remember... That can mean one of two things... It was to long ago... Or don't know how to do it yet... I do remember my first programming class, when my teacher said, "you just need to do a printf ..." And I asked, "what is that?" He looks at me, eyes wide open, for a huge amount of time, and then left without answering...

a side note, it was university class.

Finally started summer vacation and have time to develop something, but don't know what to make. How do u get ideas?😕

I don't know how to do what I'm thinking, and I can feel the impulsive, curious part of my brain preparing to spend hours reading, testing, and researching things.

Guess it's gonna be another all nighter. And it's only Monday.

I don't know whether this has been asked before but is it normal for devs to copy/paste code? I feel like half of the programming I do is copy pasting code. I mean, I know what I'm doing. I'm just lazy to type it out.

I'm helping my teammates with the problems that they face in debugging an issue or fixing a Dev environment.

Sometimes ppl go too flexible and ask for my Dev VM. The help I have to offer is tell them cause of an issue and tell them the fix that they have to give. What the fu*k they do? What did they gain as experience all these years.

Ppl don't know how to make draft commits. They can't fix but failures. They don't know anything.
They just sit at office and age as it is their only job.
Seniors take so much salary. Why don't they feel bad that they are not doing justice to their work.

So I was checking out Scaleway home page, and they said: Gitlab use their infrastructure?

Is it pure lie or gitlab really host something there? And why would they do that if they use Google?

I don't know what to trust these days lol

Said to me one time by someone I worked with who wasn't a dev over the course of a 5min talk

I don't know what you do
...
We can't have this project fail
...
It should only take 3 months but we gave you 6

<long post>

To start of I'm a student in the Netherlands, I have just finished finished a support management study and I'm currently starting with a IT Management study on MBO 4 lvl.

At the moment I'm in conflict scout doing the IT Management study or doing a application development study as I just don't know what to do. I kind of want do development as I do it in my free time and I like it but I also want to do data center engineering as I also like to work with the hardware.

Should I take a month break of my study and try to get in contact with company's to work there to finalize my decision or should I just drop in the towel and do this study without knowing if I'm going to like it in the end.

And if you work at a company in the Netherlands do you think i can do some orientation internship at your company or do you guys know some places to look at.
</Long post>

Sometimes I work from home, I don't know if i'm allowed to but nobody says nothing and I don't notify either, my record is 1 week without showing up at the office, I want to stay one month just to see what happens.

Do you think they trust me or I'm unnoticed and replaceable?

Okay, I have to ask it here, because I don't know how to ask on SO so I don't get banned.
I have a user mode driver (a dll and an inf file). How do I load it (aka call DllMain)? Do I have to install it first so it shows up in device manager? How do I load it then? No, there is no physical hardware involved, it's all software.
I've been searching for an answer for days, but when to comes to driver development, I'm such a noob that I don't even know what to look for.

I've got an interview invitation as a freelancer. I've never freelanced before. What if I don't know how to do what the client wants me to do? Halp.

I'm not lazy. If you want me to build you a typeface - I'll learn how to do it... and I'll do it ~ but when I get files like this... my brain just goes blank. I don't even know how to rename these. Even if I automate it... I don't know what any of them are. : /

I was asked to fix a bug delaying the app's email notification. When I opened the notification code file, I saw this comment previous developer wrote, it goes like
-----*This code works 70% of the time, if I try to change anything, the whole profile breaks. Please do not touch this code!. It does not worth the try*-----
Now I don't know what to do😂😂

At least pretend to have a reason for using checkboxes where the behaviour is obviously a single choice. I know I'm sometimes full of crap. I know I can waste so much time arguing for something I'm wrong about. At least I have arguments to support my approach, and I don't dismiss my mistakes. I don't need you to spend the next 5 minutes changing checkboxes for radio buttons in the mockup, it took dev 5 seconds to replace "checkbox" with "radio" and move on. However, I do need you to know what you're doing, even if it turns to be wrong.

I know this world celebrates people who can do things perfectly: models with perfect bodies, singers with perfect voices, sportsmen with perfect scores, students with perfect grades. I understand that's why you wish to try again so you can do it perfectly.

That's not what the world needs. The world needs people who know why they did what they did. It's drunk drivers who break down in the court, not serial killers. Serial killers know what they did, they know why they did it, and they believe it was the right thing to do; drunk drivers on the other hand had no idea what they did or why they did it, and they try to dismiss their wrongdoings by blaming them on alcohol, not getting a taxi, parking fees, the car, or some other circumstances.

So confront your bullshit for once. Stop searching for excuses to dismiss challenging ideas and prove you can defend your position. Otherwise, don't get angry when your "impeccable" ideas lose to someone who at least tries to defend their nonsense.