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Teachers!
Why can't they just leave me alone!?
I was using my laptop. (Linux) and I have it set up so that I do basically everything from command line.
My teacher then walks by (he was checking on people) then he sees me.
I was using a split terminal setup with a client web browser and nano open. (I was taking notes)
He sees this and like all teachers, he immediately decides that I am hacking.
So.. I saw him and was like "fuck.. this will be interesting"...
To keep this short,
I got in trouble then he spent for ever telling me about how much trouble I could get in for using "that thing" (a terminal)..
I have lost hope in all teachers..
This isn't the first time too..33 -
Biggest hurdle: torn between having boobs and missing an arm. I swear some people are under the assumption the brain is in the arm.
I am fully capable of building your network, resolving your outage due to your faulty code, can even tell you how many users your database can support at once. I don't need arms for that. Nor do my boobs distract me that badly.
"but men are going to make your life so hard" yup. And that's true no matter where i go
"all that typing with one arm can't be good for your back" welp. Find me a job that doesn't require a computer. Or manual labor. If you think typing will fuck me up, that's DEFINITELY out of the equation
"you're too pretty, there's no way this can make sense" dafuq you just say?!?!
"why don't you just stay home on disability, I'm sure you qualify, you wouldn't need to work" I'd rather be a fucking trophy wife if I'm staying at home. Fuck that.
And many more.
Sometimes they're fun. Give me more dumb arguments to counter? ;)55 -
Friend: Hey! How do you uh... alt tab out of the game?
Me: *wtf* Uhhh... You press alt tab.
Friend: *after 10 seconds* Oh! That’s why it is called alt tab.
Me: *crying laugh emoji*
5 -
Me: "I did it, I finally finished implementing the design!"
Designer: "The client wants a complete overhaul of the design."
5 -
Imagine being fucking stupid
So there is this dude at school
He's fucking stupid, but pretends to be smart
Runs a Linux computer because he is "too smart for Windows"
It's Linux Mint
Does everything with a terminal
Seems OK so far
What he does to perform a simple action is despicable. First, he whips out vim. He types out one single line that he needs to execute, saves the file as bash and runs it.
Everyone is somehow amazed
I'm also amazed
At how stupid some people are
29 -
Just had a feedback session.
Apparently one of my colleague has a problem with me.
The irony is - I didn't even knew the guy's fucking name until now.
Relatable right?11 -
Client: We need to add a field to the model that serves as a unique identifier
Dev: You already have one, it’s the _id property
Client: We want another! This one is for a task number so we can make a connection between the database record and our ERP.
Dev: Ah I see. I can add that for you. Is this truly a unique identifier or will you be using the same ERP identifier for multiple database records?
Client: I already said it’s a unique identifier. One ERP record to one database record, end of story! To do otherwise would be absolutely ridiculous! You should think for yourself before you ask silly questions.
Dev: My apologies I just want to make sure to clarify exactly what the requirements are.
**6 months later**
Client: HOW COME I CAN’T ASSIGN THE SAME UNIQUE IDENTIFIER TO MULTIPLE DATABASE RECORDS??? CAN’T PROGRAMMERS GET ANYTHING RIGHT EVER??
Dev: …15 -
"Arch Linux is actually not that difficult".
I ssh'ed into my home server yesterday.
I was greeted by a message from an ext3 disk about needing fsck. Fine, "I haven't been in here for a while, might as well do some maintenance". fsck /dev/sda6, let's go!
This nicely "repaired" the sshd service (i.e. cleared the sectors), I cursed at myself for pressing enter at "repair (y)" right before the connection broke.
So I connected a display and keyboard... ok so let's just pacman -Sy sshd or whatever. We can do this! Just check the wiki, shouldn't be that hard!
Wait... pacman has not run since 2010? WAIT IT'S ACTUAL UPTIME IS 9 YEARS??? I guess we know why I'm a DB admin and not devops...
Hmm all the mirrors give timeouts? Oh. The i686 processor architecture isn't even supported anymore...?
4 hours, 11 glasses of cognac, 73 Arch32 wiki/forum pages, 2 attempts at compiling glibc, and 4 kernel panics later: "I think I'll buy a new server".18 -
Resume: experience in c, c++, java and Android.
Recruiter: DO YOU HAVE 10+ YEARS EXPERIENCE WITH SWIFT AND IOS??!!8 -
So, I was talking to a recruiter..... After 15 minutes of telling her what I do.....She asked are you into coding?
1 -
Why on Earth are printer drivers so huge? Seriously, 1GB to print, Epson? There are entire distros of Linux that take up less than that!8
-
Me: Open terminal on current folder
Mac: No.
Me: Copy path of current folder
Mac: No.
Me: Delete this desktop icon (Delete key)
Mac: No.
Me: Lets move this icon to trash
Mac: Alrighty then, delete application.
Man i will have a hard time getting used to this, Windows had its cons but these small things made my life easier.20 -
Phone rings, recruiter: "hi Scott just come across your CV and really want to talk to you about an exciting opportunity"
Me: "Ok, cool, can I just qualify this call, what was the keyword search you used to find my profile?"
Recruiter: "it's for a Java developer role for an exciting employer"
Me: "so you matched me on a Java training course I did 8 years ago?"
Recruiter: "ok, but I see you're fully qualified in c#"
Me: "you mean the support developer role from 5 years ago?"
Recruiter: "yes"
Me: "😑"
Recruiter: "listen it's a pretty bad line can I call you on a land line or drop you an email?"
Me: "sure drop me an email with your contact details and I'll give you a call back"
Still waiting on that email...
Why can't recruiters just admit straight away that they blindly called you without even reading your CV10 -
So, I sign up for devrant and read all about the school devops fuckery everyone seems to have.
The only problem is, computers at my school's lab has no internet access and only a pirated copy of.... Visual Studio *6*. Hell, that's 5 years older than I am.
No python, no git, nothing. The best part, you ask? They use VS6 just for teaching 9th graders Visual Basic, and for C and C++, they use TurboC++ in DOSBox. 25-year old software. They teach us Pre-ANSI C++.
No fucking wonder people from here re-learn everything on the job. I jumped the gun and started messing with basic C++ in 7th grade, and then had to go back and remember that 25 years ago, they used <iostream.h> instead of just <iostream>.
Everyone just saves their code in the TC/BIN folder in DOS too, making it more of a chaotic mess than anything ever imaginable.
Bringing your own device? Too bad that's against the school rules.
The fact that they went out of their damn way to make me use TurboC in DOSBox on Windows 7 instead of giving me a sane Linux install with an editor and GCC is just... ugh.
My classmates all think I work magic, while all I really do is simple logic. Schools here in India are almost universally terrible.
Well, it's a good thing I started learning it on my own, because if I thought programming was in any way similar to how they try to teach it to us, I would've given up a long time ago.22 -
tl;dr Either I'm being incredibly touchy, or half of everyone I've interacted with is being a total jerk to me today.
I also feel like I'd be overreacting if I responded in a bitchy way, so =/ I must be nice despite everyone's behavior.
I don't want to people today.
I want to sleep.10 -
and the award for most downvotes stackoverflow post, is… well, stackoverflow. I posted this a while ago, but it got much better. -247, what a beautiful number. apparently there's a stackechange app, but instead of fixing its bugs, they made a stackoverflow app that does the same thing. go and give those cocksuckers a big, fat downvote! more pics and link in comments.
7 -
These mother fuckers know when I'm packed up and ready to go to work and decide that's the perfect fucking time to call me. WHY COULDN'T YOU CALL WHILE I WAS STILL LOGGED IN AND DIDN'T HAVE TO LOG THE FUCK BACK IN, WAIT 90 YEARS FOR THE VIRTUAL MACHINE TO LOG ME IN and then tell me your issue self resolved. Come down to my office and bring me coffee for being so damn annoying before I'm sufficiently caffeinated.4
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I am leaving my job from a very big company with very high paying package for doing my own startup.
1 month notice period on.10 -
I was working on a website for a client and he wanted an illegal (breaking TOS) functionality and I refused to implement that part so he paid me $800 less than what he owed me. Unfortunately there was no real contract besides some emails detailing the specs and payment, and if I pushed it any further he would've charged back the money he already paid me. Basically I'm screwed :/
I guess now I know how important it is to get those contracts and detailed specs written out from the very beginning.18 -
Idealistic goals:
1. Learn python
2. Start a project and see it through
Realistic goals:
1. Learn how to initialize variables in python
2. Make plans for 20192 -
All bankers are fuckers, fuckin assholes.
I went to bank today.
Gave my card to swipe and he gave me the machine to enter my pin
I entered it
But then it wasn't the actual PIN
Transaction failed
He retried it, but now he didn't give me the machine to enter the PIN, he asked me (whaaat...)
I denied to reveal my PIN
He asked me again and again I still denied.
At last that asshole cancelled the transaction.
And told me to write the deposit slip
Why should I write the slip when I have the card.
Whats wrong with that guy
Why should I give my PIN to him
These assholes come to work at 10 and leave at 3 and their pride is at the peak. They live on our money and showing superiority on us.
I hate them.10 -
WHY can I only make digital payments on weekdays, 7:00-16:00?? Its not like there's a human authorizing all transactions. And computers don't sleep!!4
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Reason #387 I wish I worked from home:
Some dude at this office needs to be banned from toilets. I'm pretty sure he craps in his hand then tries to swat it into the bowl with a slotted spoon.2 -
I had a recruiter contact me today, calling me Andrew in the process. Believe it or not my name isn't Andrew, and the email address they sent it to was me@MYFULLNAME.com, so they should be able to get my name right.
I responded to them pointing that out and advising they never contact me again. (In a somewhat sassy way).
In a well crafted apology I was informed that they had a great track record and that mistakes happen. Here's the email's subject line:
RE: Hi.. opportunity in New Haven, CT (Downtown- next to train station)- RUDE DO NOT CONTACT EVER AGAIN
I responded more kindly that I appreciated the apology but the subject line confirmed my position of "not interested."
This was followed up by them trying to "recall" the email, and resend it... Like I didn't notice the insult in the subject line of your apology...
Nicely done, nicely done.8 -
Fuck npm and the whole npm community!
Seriously, what a piece of completely uncontrolled cat litter!
First experience was getting malware from an npm package which I ranted about a while ago. That it can even happen is beyond my imagination.
Second experience was today when our app broke because a fucker who wrote a library doesn't understand semantic versioning.
If you're gonna publish an npm library, please do the whole fucking world a favour and learn how to version your shit correctly, so my app doesn't break! If you do BREAKING CHANGES don't change the fucking last version number you filthy piece of garbage!
Phew, that felt good 😧3 -
HR, why so stupid?
I'm currently living in Sweden, want to move to Austria (significant other is studying there, I'm finishing my studies over here)
Me: *Applies for a Junior Java Dev job via company's online platform*
HR1: We like your CV, be here for an interview in person in 5 days.
Me: That's expensive, can we do it via Skype? I'm still in Sweden.
HR1: How are you planning on working in Austria while living in Sweden?
Me: I'm not. I'll move to Austria in 2 months. That's when I'd like to start working with you.
Me: *wonders why they skipped that part in my CV/cover letter as it's clearly stated there*
HR1: ....
Me: Hello?
Me: Helloooo?
HR2: We're sorry to tell you that the position of Senior Database Engineer has been filled. May we use your CV for other potential openings at our company?
Me: No worries, I applied for Junior Java Dev anyways. You may use my CV for other openings.
HR2: Oh, sorry for the confusion. I just mistyped the job title.
Me: *WTF? That was a machine-generated answer. Your system filed my application in the wrong place. You didn't mistype shit.*
HR1: Oh good for you. We've suddenly found out we need a Junior Java Dev as well as a Senior Database Engineer. Do you have time for a Skype interview this afternoon?
Me: ....
HR1: Hello?
Me: ....
HR1: Tomorrow then?4 -
Client:
"Ok,. so your saying that its gonna take you 63 hrs to create a simplified CRM with basic functionality and auto fill docs or automated work flow docs as an added feature?"
My response (after already under-quoting and planning on cutting some corners because he has a smaller budget than normally necessary):
"It sounds simpler than it is. There are a lot of things I need to take into account that you wouldn't even think about.
For instance:
Making sure your emails don't go to the client's spam folder. This requires the sending domain to be verified via DNS settings. I have to ensure your email content passes a spam test (link to text ratio needs to be good). I assumed you'd want an email that has your logo and looks good. This means testing the design in Outlook to make sure it's not broken.
What if the email doesn't send due to an invalid email address, or bounces back? You'll need to be notified.
What if the client list for the week contains duplicates? You need them merged or ignored.
Generating a PDF from HTML can be tricky because the conversion isn't apples to apples so there are things I need to adjust to make them as close as possible.
Making a site completely mobile friendly (the tier 3 option) can be very time consuming as well. It's not about whether or not it fits on a mobile phone, it's about whether or not it's intuitive and useful. You're essentially getting a mobile app without paying for separate development of an app.
If I took everything into consideration and built this to be 100% bullet proof, it would cost tens of thousands.
I'm doing my best to leverage your needs with the probability of running into an issue. I'm not going waste my time/your money on something that will likely never happen."9 -
Everything but UI/UX
Because I suck at it, lame but true, I love every kind of code, from MEAN and LAMPP to assembly, but when it comes to UI I just lack of the imagination and creativity to design something that looks averagely good.6 -
When you are coding, put your coffeepot on fire, and forgot about it for two hours.
My life suck tonight.
12 -
Today is good, so far.
Husband graduates and promotes and my younger brother made it to Texas safely this morning.
Oh, and I'm out of the office 😄5 -
Finally made my laptop a dedicated linux machine, time to start working on a theme then to start on OS development until Gamemaker comes to linux! :-P
14 -
Got a request on a freelance site, was about modding a game.
I've answered thinking "easy money", then he reveals it's for a console, that it's not "hacked" so I couldn't run any third-party script.
I've tried to kindly explain the situation and he seemed having understood.
Few minutes ago I checked my inboxes and I got a bad review on that freelance platform, of course from him. 👌1 -
Frack..people suck.
In sprint planning meeting, prioritizing the tasks...
ScrumMaster: "Next item, create a spreadsheet that identifies the systems used by order processing so the PO can identify errors by system."
Me: "That's already done."
ScrumMaster: "Did you work ahead of the sprint again?"
- Really trying not to throw something heavy at his head.
Me: "No, you did back in January."
- SM stutters..um..uhhs...
ScrumMaster: "No, I never did that...see."
- SM navigates to the sharepoint directory
Me: "Yep, there it is."
ScrumMaster: "I didn't create it, you must have."
Me: "Created by...you."
ScrumMaster: "Uh...um....I might have added it to sharepoint, but doesn't mean I created it. Anyway, lets take a look..."
- opens the spreadsheet
ScrumMaster: "What is this? Did you simply export the sharepoint list to excel?"
- Getting harder and harder to resist the urge to throw something heavy at his head.
Me: "I don't know what that is, you created it. You commented on the Trello card that this task item was done."
ScrumMaster: "No, I've never seen this or made any comment on the Trello board...lets look ..."
- FRACK!!! TRELLO IS DOWN!!!
ScrumMaster: "When Trello comes back up I'll assign the card to you. Lets stay on task with the cards from now on. Next item ... "
Trello up, 3 hours later, back at my desk, there is his fracking comment from January about uploading the spreadsheet to sharepoint. Frack frack frack people suck3 -
Helpful tip to all you freelancers or those with the authority:
Never let a client dictate anything in how you do your job, no matter how simple.
Even if they ask you to make yourself available at a specific time, don't. Instead, tell them times you have available so they have to work with you.
If you give a client an inch, they will always take a mile.3 -
Me at an interview...
interviewer: can u solve a 3-sum problem
me: sir, a threesome is not a problem
interviewer: not threesome, 3-sum
me: OOOOO! that makes sense6 -
I am so fucking sick of hardware design and integration projects.
First thought, let's outsource. Except the best quote we got was $2.8M for a fucking 10 by 10 board with 200 components. What the dick shit is this did I send the email as Bill fucking Gates or something so they all thought I'm shitting gold bars?
Micro X comes with awesome frameworks and SDKs but you can't use it because it doesn't have those extra 2 pins you need.
Micro Y has them but they're not 5V tolerant so you can't use the $8 chinkese relay board, you have to add your own onboard relays which will cost you $25 and a blowjob for some FUCKING RELAYS
Then there's micro F to the rescue! enough pins, 5V tolerant, awesome SDK give or take a few months guessing how the fuck to use that 40Mb of C code library & fixing someone's fucking code, but wait, you can't use it because it has no external interrupts so basically you have to keep polling inputs and can't go to sleep, so you need to run the core at full speed and guess what the fuck it is more power hungry than the hottest trophy wife at 200mA.
No problem, fuck this shit, let's go STM like I told you so in the beginning - but I should be the one to pick the micro and all power components. Here's the specs, call me when it's done, we'll fuck with some of the web apis in the meanwhile. 2 weeks later: fuck all of you, I can't find what you need!
Then smartass #173 comes with the brilliant idea to try them chinkese PLCs with integrated HMIs, wtf they're cheaper than what you idiots are building?!. Sure, let's go for it. Spend $3000 on test units, wait 8 weeks because EU customs and taxes, then finally - NONE are usable despite the suppliers who swear it works, it has transistors on outputs, i'll be fucked it even lets you stick your cock in and gives you a tickle.
Then dickweed C-motherfucking-TO goes like, sure, let's go bare metal again, wtf we are old hardcore fucks with big cocks, plug a $8 pic24 and it will do the job. Except you have to spend 18935718 fucking years writing everything in C and when you're almost done guess what the fuck happened, we still need another micro so we can have ethernet and connect to a MQTT server.
No problem, trash all the work, let's pull the big guns, pic32mx-what-the-fuck, spend 1 month getting the toolchain to work and 2 more months writing all sorts of fucking signs and dashes and commas and brackets in MOTHERFUCKING C again and when we all think omfg we're done, some moron decides to test the board at high humidity and low temp and guess what the fuck happens - it breaks because that shit isn't rated what we need, but the fucktard was on paternity leave 5 eons ago when we started because his fucking wife gave birth and he couldn't spend a couple hours testing a blinky in his own fucking house in the fridge or wherever the fuck, so he just said yes and now guess what - we're all fucked.
Then let's try this shit board, it has the USB support and we can put one of them cheap ass ethernet chips, we'll just connect it to android via OTG and let the fucking google connect to the API over 3G. Except motherfucking android and its usb stack add some 100ms of latency which is basically more than I need to cook 3 fucking meals or some idiot needs to die electrocuted because the estop button doesn't shut down the relays fast enough.
2 years later I still don't have a workable prototype. Fuck my life. Fuck whoever planned this shit, they must have been brain fucked, in fact fuck this shit altogether. Fuck computers and processors and servers and micros and every fucking atom of copper in this fucking house.3 -
In a UAT meeting with representatives of our project partners,
The account executive, who set up the project, said to my PM in front of everyone just before the test started: "I hope your system won't fail, because everyone here will be watching"
My PM: "No it won't. But in that case, I believe it's your fault for setting an unrealistic deadline without consulting us, the development team, first"
All the representatives, being also developers from multiple companies, proceeded to stare at her with disgust.2 -
Recruiter e-mail:
„Hope this InMail finds you in the best of your health.
I was going through your profile and found your Scala experience pretty attractive. Infact your experience matches one of the job requirements that I'm working on.”
Sure, but I don’t have anything even remotely mentioning Scala on my profile.2 -
Dev memes usually make me cringe. It's like the people who make them are trying too hard; the lack of social skills just jumps off the screen.2
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On call just started at 2100 last night. Phone rang at 0230. Going to be a long rotation.
Similar call from a few weeks ago that took 13 hours to resolve. Oh boy.16 -
DHL? More like, "Du Hurensohn Lieferst ned!"
Seriously! Fuck DHL so fucking hard! Why the FUCK can you deliver 2 FUCKING PACKAGES, WHICH REQUIRE SIGNING, INFRONT OF MY FUCKING ENTRANCE!! But not, A FUCKING 3rd one! LIKE SERIOUSLY! I WAS AT FUCKING HOME THE ENTIRE FUCKING DAY! THEN I RECIEVE AN EMAIL THAT THE FUCKING PACKAGE "couldnt be delivered because I wasnt at home" YEAH FUCK YOU! 2 INFRONT OF MY FUCKING DOOR! and then... I see him... that fucking DHL guy, with my package, going INTO HIS FUCKING SHITASS DHL CAR, AND DRIVING OFF!
I literally just wanted to open the window and scream "HEY DHL, MEIN SCHEISS PACKET! WO ISSET!?" but I didnt...
FUCK THESE COCKSUCKERS FROM DHL! I HAVE A FUCKING LOUD DOORBELL! RING THAT THING! THERES A BUTTON WITH MY NAME NEXT TO IT!14 -
I have to study for bible study finals... 15 pages of summary. Yes, 15 pages for just a summary.
I don’t even wanna learn this shit 😭
16 -
Me starting a project: Okay I'm stuck with this project I'll just shelve this for now
[3 weeks later]
*comes back to project*
*find a solution with problem I came stuck with*
WHAT THE FUCK BRAIN WHY DID IT TAKE YOU 3 WEEKS TO HELP ME FIX SHIT WRYYYYY7 -
My compartmentalizing skill is not good enough. Wasted last night by doing nothing and falling asleep because of a bad mood. I have shit tons of tasks.3
-
I was debugging my UDP server and client for 3 hours until I realized our school network has a firewall which blocks my connections.6
-
Having some thoughts as I sit here, trapped in the house by equal parts coronavirus and a layer of smoke drowning out the sun. The smoke is a bit of an annual thing; every year, some irresponsible jerk will go out and put their convenience and enjoyment over everyone else's quality of life.
It's a bit different this year since coronavirus has given people cabin fever. Those same people who lose their minds after weeks of isolation and suffering the indignity of wearing a mask headed out into the wilderness for recreation in record numbers.
The result is record wildfires.
Where I'm at, it's mostly coming from the eastern part of our state. The area is typified by being on the mountain range's dry side, more rural, less densely populated. Towns have burned, people lost their homes, millions of acres of land will likely burn before it's over. It happens every year; people pack up, head out into the wilderness, and cause devastation due to a simple lack of common sense or regard for the consequences of their actions.
On the west side, we see the fallout in the form of days without sunlight and abysmal air quality. We also see it in cost; we will unquestionably and without hesitation contribute to eastern recovery efforts. The western half of the state will cover almost all of the damage in both taxes and recovery aid. Our local ethos demands it.
The mountains form a kind of natural barrier, both cultural and environmental. The fact that few people cross the mountains by choice is symbolic of that divide. Those who enjoy greenery and lakes and thriving vibrant nature prefer the west, as we have them in abundance. People who have a strong appreciation for distance between themselves and other humans prefer the east, as it affords them cheaper land and few urban environments.
Here's to hoping people learn from this in 2021.19 -
One of my coworkers just had a baby, so he left work today and won't be back for a month or more.
We (accidentally) took the client's website down for 3 hours, messed up our git repo and when we finally fixed both things, I had to spend the rest of the day editing fucking vector graphics (which I had never done before and completely suck at).
I never realized how much work this guy does or how important he is until now.14 -
Let’s see I suppose the most pissed off I’ve been at work would be....
Being blamed for a clients mistake when their newsletter email settings where being changed over to a new mailing system but during the change over they wanted to still send out mail using the old list. So a single endpoint was kept in place so they could send one last newsletter out after it was approved as part of the migration and they were to inform us when they were done so we could change that endpoint over.
Several months later when everyone had long forgotten about it, the client tried to send another mass mail out using the old endpoint and complained when no emails had been sent.
I was blamed for making this mistake even though management approved the fucking old endpoint to be left in place at the clients request against my concerns that someone’s going to forgot about this and I was never informed to swap it over.
I quit on the spot and walked out the door after that. -
I love it how managers try to act busy by going through the same mails over and over again while waiting for a new one so that they can instantly reply to it and show themselves off as "prompt" and screw us, who have to actually do some work, about not sending mails promptly and they have like this one single excel sheet opened at all times and they just make one obscure entry whenever they get an update and WOW, some of them don't even know how the fuck you spell Avro (spelt it as avero, handwritten) and oh, not to mention waste everyone's time by asking a mundane question that other managers are so eager to answer, one by one, over and over and did I mention THAT THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW HALF THE PRODUCT.
-
Ok... So iPhone X cames with 3gb ram and 2.7 mAh battery....
Fuck the new Xiami that costs 1/4 comes with 4gb ram and a 4mAh battery...6 -
I just realized this is the "week" where I am on call for a week and a half. Over a 3 day weekend. Hoping my friends are free and can save me from my insanity...7
-
Just watched a 30 mins tutorial on youtube and atleast 20 mins of that was debugging his code. Can't you just re-record or atleast cut the part where you go through all the stack overflow solutions!1
-
Just spent 2 fucking hours debugging one of my websites scripts because apparently appendChild wasn't a function... Here I was thinking there was a function called getElementByClassName... Dick head me didn't realise I'm missing a single 's'... 2 hours over a single fucking s!
Fuck javascript man...12 -
this is how I found this website:
me searching on google, "is java a piece of sh*t"
that's how I reached here6 -
Step 1: Acquire Rasbpery Pi
Step 2: Install Rasbian Lite
Step 3: Install PiHole
Step 4: Setup VPN
Step 5: Get a domain name for the VPN server
Step 6: Install OpenVPN on Phone
Step 7: Connect to Rasbperry PiHole Server
NO MORE ADS MOTHERFUCKERS8 -
To the cunts who use single character aliases for their SQL queries table joins... Suck my throbbing dick till you choke on it and die....
That's all... back to work10 -
On call part 4: you know when you're too angry to express your anger appropriately (ensure the level of rage is fully understood and appreciated)? Yeah. 12 hour phone call later, I'm there
-
There are clients who always suggest an idea then after they suggest they will say "...again don't do this yet, its not a big deal blah blah blah"
Then the other day they will ask if their idea is already implemented.
🤦🏻♂️6 -
Fucking hell everything in java is so annoying, confusing and hard to get working. I just want to use JavaFX, why do you require me to sacrifice a lamb in order to do so? It might be my fault though, but c'mon, I don't want to spend 2-3 hours reading through shitty documentation in order to understand how maven works and what the hell Gradle is. Why can't it be as simple as adding a module name to a config file, like in Rust's Cargo? Even using intellij to acquire JavaFX and set it as a dependency doesn't work, it gives me some weird "JavaFX not configured" bullshit error. What the fuck, you're a library, you shouldn't need anything else ffs7
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I got call from a recruiter today for a job I applied for on ziprecruiter. The job is listed as remote. He says no, it's Denver, I said ok, well the listing says remote, he says, ok, remote is fine. He then argued with me about salary after I said it depends on the company on where I'm happy to negotiate to, and I'd want to know about benefits etc.. here is what I currently make, etc etc. He kept on trying to make me pick an hourly number.. I said I don't know the company, so he told me the company name.. them started in again about hourly rate (no idea who the company was). Finally he moved on and said he'd email details.
5 mins later, email comes through, please give hourly salary. Then another saying he'd pass my details on and I can just ask for about remote during the interview. And then another email 2 mins later asking for education etc, all of which is in my resume. I looked the company he was recruiting for up to find that it's an IT recruitment firm, looking to fill a clients position. So a recruiter recruiting for a recruiter :|
I'll be so happy when I find a new job and don't have to deal with these idiots again.3 -
I received a LinkedIn message from a recruiter who thinks I'd be a good fit for a role that requires being fluent in German.
My LinkedIn profile clearly states I only have elementary proficiency in German.
I'm gonna reply and see how long it will take for him to notice 😈6 -
Can interviewers PLEASE stop asking cliche and terrible questions??
Interviewer: "Where do you see yourself in five years?"
Me: "Not with you guys obviously, you dumb piece of shit."
That's what I'd like to say to them at least... :/7 -
Been at a startup for 2-3 weeks, hood some presentations about Linux and Foss stuff but they didn't have any work for anyone and as such didn't pay anything.
Pretty shitty.
So a colleague was like "hey man, I seed you making those presentations and stuff but not getting anything back, I think I might got a job for you".
And now I do small data analysis at another company. And get money. -
Passionate programmer attends one of the toughest interviews ever and solves lot of algorithmic problems coding in different programming languages. Impresses the interview panel providing solutions with as much as efficiency as possible. Gets selected, completes induction and gets a nice Dev machine allocated.
Manager walks in and says we got to work with the production support team on fixing a UI bug.
2 -
How to get me to never respond to your email: make the subject line say "Salesforce ninjaneer wanted!!!"
First of all I don't do salesforce and second ninjaneer is not a word. I hate when people say code ninja or code warrior or any of those other crap phrases. I'm a software developer. Respect that or suck it.9 -
Our 10th grade computer classes in school consisted only of writing 1 printf statement in C, which earned you an A.1
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I'm fucked on wine so I'm just going to fucking rant this one out.
Noticed and only by random chance that a comment I made was gone, and though huh. What the fuck. Have I been downvoted to hell? Nah, I don't think so. Then why?
Ah, post is gone. Wait, what? THE POST IS GONE? WHY.
I hate you for deleting shit. You got that? I. HATE. YOU. It's not about your background, your ethnicity, your gender or how much of a fucking voidstar your heart is. I don't give a single fuck about THAT.
But you deleted a GODDAMN RANT? I hate you, I hate you, I hate you. That is now a moment that might as well have never existed. You have basically given me the virtual equivalent of a blackout. You've STOLEN my time.
And all for what? Nothing, big ole pile of fuck & nuthin. You're a goddamn chicken man. Do and do not regret. Act like a MAAANNN.
I tell you this is the first problem. Cowardice. This is THE very first problem. Shit has to be done but them be afraid-ers. And not even behind the keyboard you can muster some balls. THAT is an insult. A very serious one.
And don't gimmie your sob story, fuck you. I'm under minimum wage and my wife is dead. I don't use that to justify shit. That'd be disgraceful. Have some fucking BAWLZ man. Step up, own up, or shut the fuck up.
Yadda, yadda, might come off as an attack. Well what you basically launched was an attack, on a much broader scale that this. So what. Aren't we all grownups? Sorry, I thought this wasn't fucking kindergarten. Express yourself. Talk it out. If you think there's an issue, then the LEAST you can do is bring it up. And I support on you on that. But if you can't stand to do even that then why in the fuck are you opening your mouth in the first place. Or writing, in this case. You get the idea.
I'm gonna go in circles probably but what the hell. I blame the USA. So sensitive about words. Not so sensitive when launching drone strikes, but that's a sotry for another day. Don't get political on me or I'll haunt your dreams, that is a promise, one I can certainly keep. You don't know about my arcane powers.
Also what IS a bias. I have some vague idea of what BIOS is but not bias. Sounds funny as fuck to me. Prejudice bad? Ya sure yet everybody is higher than shit on prejudice. Sniffup that thing, man. Ugh. That's good. There's some kids in my neighborhood, literally sitting right around the corner, slanging yeyo. They ain't got shit. The mother fucking police takes most of their illicit earnings, funny enough. You think they ain't buried up to their necks in solid shit? Ah, but what YOU go through is so terrible, people are so mean.
You're soft like a newborn, Pippin. But you're not a baby anymore. Grow a fucking pair. Go out there and tell 'em they suck. You can do it babyboy. This is now motivational harassing. GET IT TOGETHER.
I got lost now and don't want to rewind this. But I'm going to lead by example now and click POST on this viscous, stinking dump of a rant, and bear all of the "NEGATIVITY" in order to show you how it's done. You're welcome.
One more thing fix the fucking image uploading because I miss the spicy memes, goddamit. I need another drink.8 -
So our internship company had this client who wanted to rebrand. We are a team of 5 students(Copy writer, Digital marketer, Graphic designer, UI/UX designer and Web Developer)
We made a list of changes we propose in the website (She happily approved)
We discussed the changes in the meeting (She happily approved!)
Finally, changes were made and and we asked her again if she wants us to publish the new website (She approved!!)
After publishing the changes, she emailed my team lead stating “She did not like the changes. She did not approve it and we should not have published it. Also, the rebranding is worst.”
FUCKER. LIAR. I HOPE HER BUSINESS FAILS.2 -
Most of my classmates sucked. No message, no connection requests, no exchanging smiles(even when I do). Now that I got a job and updated that on LinkedIn, everyone suddenly wants to know how I am, If I am doing good in this pandemic and that they are happy for me following with “Where did you get the job” and “If you can refer me”.
Suckers, Fuckers.5 -
Nothing good will ever come by looking at your old projects. It is the dev equivalent of reading your old social media posts.5
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Fuck HP!
They make worst fucking printers in the universe. Just because I don’t have color cartridge doesn’t mean I can’t print anything in monochrome! Also apparently my black cartridge is broken, even tho it worked just a minute ago.6 -
Meeting of 10 minutes to review and grade a project that took months to make. Apparently your supervisor giving you proper attention is not important enough, compared to him getting his food delivery.
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Would have loved if my teachers had any idea about coding, more over, if they had any idea about coding in big projects, even more if they had any idea of producing understandable maintainable code and had taught people about it.
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LinkedIn shows that I’m a web developer, using mainly laravel, twig, less, JavaScript, etc.
Recruiters: are you interested in a java function? Possibly .net? We’re also looking for network engineers...6 -
Windows is when your computer just exits it's life via fucken BSOD.
But then there's linux. Half-freezing up, making you switch to tty2 just to see via htop, the machine is essentially idle. Nice. Fuck you.8 -
We've been using a recruiter who works out of the same business park as us. They purport to be "specialists in technology".
Somehow a conversation got started and I ended up explaining how we make use of open source software, where possible.
Their response: "That's the free one, right?".3 -
80% of the YouTube tutorials that I've watched suck and only wasted 10 minutes of my time each. Sometimes, I can work well with doing shit myself. Discovering errors yourself teach you more than following along someone else.2
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I suspected that our storage appliances were prematurely pulling disks out of their pools because of heavy I/O from triggered maintenance we've been asked to automate. So I built an application that pulls entries from the event consoles in each site, from queries it makes to their APIs. It then correlates various kinds of data, reformats them for general consumption, and produces a CSV.
From this point, I am completely useless. I was able to make some graphs with gnumeric, libre calc, and (after scraping out all the identifying info) Google sheets, but the sad truth is that I'm just really bad at desktop office document apps. I wound up just sending the CSV to my boss so he can make it pretty.1 -
How about creating a new programming language named "C slang"
highlights from the language:
1. variable declaration :
by default, all declaration are var, but inorder
to declare a constant, write:
cunt a = 15; // means const a = 15;
2. input and output :
suck(b) // input stored in variable b
spit(b) // output b
3. function declaration:
f**k <function_name>(parameters);
4. null or None will be replaced by sh*t
for example: if(node root == sh*t)....
any other sh**y recommendation will be appreciable6 -
Me and my project partner were explaining a idea for a smart mirror in front of two of our teachers (female) for our major project of final year.
After telling all the features and things it will do for 15 minutes, one of them very seriously said that,
"so basically you are making a smart mobile app".
We both died a little inside that day... 💀 -
So a few weeks back guy I used to work with contacts me for some dev work on a UK project he is working on, it's the Thursday and they need the thing the coming Monday. I tell him it's totally impossible, and it was so he asks what can done and how much, as well as how much for the entire project.
I stipulate exactly what can be done, with exclusions and say 7.5k and them mail over a detailed quote for 30k for everything.
I get told it's all fine, I must go ahead. I get through a bit more than expected by the Monday, but they still needed something to demo and I set I can get enough for demo in place by Thursday.
They demo to business and money and all that and everyone is happy and tell me to finish up along with some changes, and I don't even adjust the price as it was more work they wanted outside of the original spec.
Get to probably 80% done and they say we need to pause they need to look over other feedback.
Next thing, the PM come back, no they were never actually happy with the quote and they found some other guy willing to do the entire thing for 7.5k and they willing to only give me that for the code I have written so far. Cunts.
Anyway, he tries to take some blame for it, even though I know it's BS and says he will pay in another 7.5k from his share if I am willing and we call it quits.
This people, is why I don't freelance.
I feel sorry for this new kid, he clearly under quoted, and yes I am expensive, but with decades experience having worked on international projects for one of the largest digital asset management firms, my countries leading fintech dev house and now the lead developer for my countries largest insurance software dev house, you damn fucking strait my free time comes at a premium, as you are getting top fucking quality, 100% tested, high performing code.
They can go fuck an entire flock of ducks when they come back after this half ling fucks up the diamond I coded up for them.
Even funnier, they a UK based company, so for them this was a 1.5k project. Cheap cunts.3 -
Dear client,
If you provide me a PDF file that you name a design, and don’t provide any info I can’t do much with it.
So I got a PDF design for the program I was building. I tried to rebuild the elements and copy your photos. As you said this was the only file the designer had. But don’t expect me to look for your fonts, sizes etc. And then complain that I need to be more specific in the design... and sending me by once do I need to ask her something?
Just f*** off -
A dev found a bug I created where I set a SQL parameter name to @OrderID instead of the expected @Order. The standard is @OrderID, there is one stored proc where it's @Order.
Oops...I didn't catch it because the integration test didn't cover that area of the code. My mistake...I should have checked...I take complete responsibility for the screw up.
He let me know by email..
"When refactoring, from now on check the stored procedure parameters, there are a few that don't follow the standard."
I was like "from now on..."? ...wow....bold comment from someone responsible for code that doesn't check for nulls, doesn't log errors, and relies on exceptions for flow control. You wouldn't even have known about the error if I didn't modify your code to log the error (the try..except returned false)
I really wanted to reply ...
"Fixed. From now on, when you come across those easily found bugs, go head and fix it, write a test, and move on. Don't send a condescending email to me, my boss, your boss, all the DBAs, and the entire fracking order processing team. Thanks."
But..I thanked him for finding and letting me know...we're a team..blah blah blah..
Frack..people suck.1 -
Client wants this "demo" LIVE by the end of the month... But still not got access to THEIR API yet!!! 😑1
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If a client changes the formatting of their data without telling me, and it breaks the code that I wrote for them, could they own up to their lack of communication, and not give me shit for it?
This problem was caused entirely by you. Can you fuck right off? Would you kindly? -
Turns out getting users to put in literally any effort to do something ends up in them putting in zero effort and just not bothering. Users suck.2
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Fucking Chinese designers...
Spent all afternoon leveling the 3D printer table while scratching it a lot.
all afternoon to understand that one piece is bent and the extruder is a lot lower it should have been...
Meanwhile, leveled the table with my knowledge of CNC and a specific tool that allows me to take measures up to 0.01mm...
Could have saved €20 on this fucking auto leveler that doesn't really work.8 -
Java Server Faces!
Don't get me wrong, I kinda love coding Java, but JSF is just a horrible technique for web development.
Had to do it since my company got to maintain an already existing backend which the customer wanted to have some more Features but the original dev didnt continue to support.
Attached hello world example from good old mykong for those not knowing jsf: http://mkyong.com/jsf2/...
4 -
random girl: words can't describe how ugly you look
me: words can't describe how beautiful you look
random girl: blushes :)
me: but numbers can...
me: 2/103 -
Fuck arch.
I know what you're thinking
"arch isn't that bad he's overreacting"
WELL I'M NOT OVERREACTING!
Thanks to me trying to install Arch i cant get my laptop to boot. It just say some thing about network boot failing. I cant go into BIOS either. It doesn't work! I cant even boot from usb!! It still just say some thing about network boot failing, shows some weird black screen with a black bar at the top left and after a while shows some thing about network boot failing again and that repeats9 -
Dear recruiter
Thanks for spamming me with several emails for your AngularJs role paying £200 per day.
I'd rather stack shelves in Asda, probably pays better too.3 -
Still boggles my mind that it took something like coronavirus for people to start covering their mouth when sneezing / coughing, washing hands and let's not even mention public places like shopping malls and stores to start with regular disinfection of their premises.. 🙄🤦♂️8
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Everyday life of a programmer:
Crying, coding, crying, coding, crying, coding, crying, coding, crying, coding, crying, coding, crying, coding, crying, coding, crying, coding,
coding while crying...8 -
I will never work in an open floor plan environment again.
The average salary is 6 figures and they can't even spring for sound deadening material on the concrete walls, nevermind cubicles.
Nothing says "I don't value your contribution to our product" quite like treating your engineers like cattle.4 -
These days when I go out with friends for gatherings, it feels really awkward to talk with people. Most times I don't fit in the crowd at all. I feel at home, with my laptop doing something, even procrastinating seems worthwhile when compared to this.
Does anyone feel the same way? Or, it's just a very personal thing?8 -
Being a social media influencer i.e. having a couple thousand followers doesn’t make you entrepreneur. Period.2
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Yesterday we were four developers working together on a bug. What do you call it? Quad programming?
Anyway, we solved it!4 -
After previous rant (https://lynkz.me/9xAFVZ9) he told me to be as close as possible to the design from the designer. There was on the left side a BarCode, which made no sense. So I didn’t add it. Now today (saturday) he told me I need to add the barcode because it looks classy. I told him we had a QR code already with same data. His anwser, yeah but it looks better with Barcode added too. Just f*** off! Your classy, shitty barcode will have a great price as it’s weekend. Thanks @linuxxx for the url shortner, it’s awesome!9
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Yay! Another meeting to go over a design concept for the next version of our website, awesome this makes meeting 163
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Not a rant but seemed appropriate. I was finding Pokemon at my desk while reading clientsfromhell.com and this happened
1 -
let's understand HTML
step 1: arrange a table
step 2: get some lemons
step 3: get a squeezer
step 4: cut the lemon in half and squeeze it
step 5: pour the lemon fluid into a glass tumbler
step 6: add some water and put a sucking straw
AND THERE YOU GO
you just understood HTML( How To Make Lemonade)12 -
Is there anyone else who's working for a company regardless of day and nights? Holidays or working days? And still get the old shitty pay?
Fuck this job I want to resign but can't do it because of financial problem.
damn I'm hating this situation.
do anybody know how can we build freelance profile how much time it takes?3 -
Today in office one lady came to me and asked "how to reboot iPhone when it stuck?"
I'm android guy and using iPhone only for Dev purposes. So I never encountered such issues and was a bit confused.
Then I were smoking on the roof with coworker and asked:
- When last time you seen unresponsive android device?
- Hmm... I dunno
- And what about iPhone?
- Yeah, my wife's iPhone 7+ and daughter's iPhone 6 stuck regularly.
We laughed, but wtf?
Then I've tried to remember when Linux or Mac were stuck. Nothing.
Don't start holy war, please. Just noticed that.13 -
When you think maybe these Christams will be better. No! They fucking won't. I hate this time of the year so fucking much.6
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Is it okay for someone to printout their own devRant stickers which includes the devRant logo (this :/)?
I am unable to get the stickers on my own. We don't have international shipping/mailing. But I know a local sticker printing shop which can print one for me. And I really one one for me.9 -
Once there was this fucking recruiter who actually had the nerve to call the head-secretary of the entire R&D department of the company my girlfriend works at, to ask to be put through to her after explicitly telling the secretary what the reason for the call was.
I mean, even if my girlfriend wanted to be contacted by some shitforbrains single-celled lowlife like you, how stupid can you be, calling the head-secretary for at least 400 people and then telling them you are headhunting?1 -
I remember the promise I made to myself when I dropped out of university to look for work.
"I'll explore different areas of software engineering since I like a number of them. But never shall I ever do backend web development"
Guess what job I landed.1 -
My next project is a functional fitness/crossfit application and my client requires me to attend and participate sessions with them in order for me to understand and appreciate the sport. I got the point but OMG I only know sports via tv,youtube,etc.. and not really fun of socializing. I might die doing this project. Help me!4
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To all my people who don’t like to code emails (the sane people): there is MJML. It’s an easy, quick and overall the best way to create emails nowadays. You won’t need to learn quirks, you can learn MJML in a day and make pretty much any email you need.
There’s even a vscode live preview plugin, don’t know about other ides though but I’m sure there is something.
LONG LIVE MJML4 -
Asshole that my client hired: "You will be reporting to me now. As per client request."
Me: "I will murder you." -
Developer contract, day rate £500 in London or £400 remote working! WTF!
Does the agency/client seriously think they should pay less for the same work if done remotely? If anything, remote should pay more, it saves the client money and the remote worker will probably have more productive hours without the fucking shitty commute.4 -
- working on a personal project
- got angry at windows for sucking so bad at running fucking vs code of all things
- banged the palm rest on laptop in rage
- windows freezes
- restart
- harddisk died
- lost my collection of notes from college
- lost all my photos
- but most importantly, lost my progress on a project that I was working on and hadn't git push
- FANTASTIC
Lession learned. Always have a backup. ALWAYS.6 -
I am currently a CS major, studying in a toxic university that teaches no more than old-school stuff.
I know HTML, CSS, and JS (self-taught), and at present, I am spending time on React.js.
I'm also a competitive programmer.
I badly wanna move out of this toxic educational environment and wanna do something that's worth spending time on.
I am feeling like I am just wasting both my time and money in this old-school university.
what should I do? help me out?
I am thinking that once I am fluent enough with HTML, CSS, JS, React, and some database stuff, I must start finding jobs in small startups.
badly need some guidance. PLEASE HELP ME...24 -
Hi there.. Stuck since days in the google auth error:disallowed_useragent with xamarin, my colleagues ask me to ask to u :p (the same as the mac with windows features photo)
1 -
Do you have to be a math genius to program?
I myself hate math but have been programming for a hobby in about 3 years now.
I keep hearing that you have to know a lot of math to program even though i usually only use basic math when i do.9 -
Making a ticket support system using wordpress for a uni group project. I go away for a week and team tells me they have done loads of work.
so I take a look at out github to find that they haven't used a single wordpress function and have just written there own php application with their own tables and db class, and now they don't know why things aren't working.
I'm going to need several litres of coffee to get through this3 -
I'm not really satisfied with any of the major smarthome systems out there, so I'm making my own and using it as a learning experience. What I've learned so far, is that I suck at naming...
Best thing I can come up with is EasyDIYHome....7 -
Would love to share my experience with tutorial hell.
A year ago, if there is no tutorial teaching me how to do something, I am totally lost and stuck for days. Then, I decided to see how people got out of it.
The answer turned to be simple, get comfortable reading documentation AFTER you determine what you are trying to accomplish.
In other words:
1- Determine the problem and the desired end result.
2- Break the problem down into multiple smaller ones.
3- Determine the end result of the solution of each of those problems.
4- Read the documentation concerning what you need to use to solve each problem.
5- Execute.
Over time, you would find the need for a tutorial much less in order to solve a problem. Plus, documentation would ideally give the optimal solution for your problem.
Would still be cool if you find a tutorial explaining something hard to grasp, but never depend on finding one.2 -
Helping out a team, I was documenting some code/processes when I came across several classes that was logging a lot of, IMO, 'junk' that was unnecessary (and I knew wasn't being used in any Splunk alerts/reports)
I offer a refactoring suggestion, simplifying the data being logged, moving the duplicate code to a central location, maybe saving 10~20 lines of code. Didn't think it was a big deal because they were already actively working on the code and it was all new code (nothing deployed to production yet). Sent the suggestion to the lead developer and he responds:
Dev: "Yes, the changes looks fine, but not in scope of the project. Any out of scope work will need to be suggested at the end of the project, reviewed by the team, the project manager and approved by the vice president."
"Out of scope"? Logging data to Splunk needs a vice president's approval? WTF?
YOU PROBABLY HAVE THE PROJECT OPEN IN VISUAL STUDIO RIGHT NOW!!!
Along with the documentation the lead dev said they didn't have time to do, I send his boss and the dev team my suggested changes (before-after screen shots of the code) and offered to do the 2 minutes worth of work (again, this was new code, nothing in production and zero side affects to anything).
I even offered to create the splunk reporting/alerting against the data being logged (another item they said they would not have time to do)
About a minute later the lead dev responds..
Dev: "Those changes look good. I'll have Jake make those changes and we can test the logging when we deploy to dev on Monday. Thanks!"
Of course you will...fracking ass hat.
I'll bet my Battlestar Galactica DVD box set he was going to make the changes himself, brag to his boss how he refactored the code, saving X lines of code..blah blah blah to help *me* with documenting the logging portion. -
Me: *asking a friend* Are recruiters friends or foes when searching for a gig?
Friend: they are motherFOEkers1 -
Why are all the developers non-athletic? I have never seen a bodybuilder developer and not much sports events happens in a software company !!12
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!dev
Hello there..
I always wanted to have my first post here be something that pisses the sh!t out of me.
tl;dr: Memes are for braindeads and kids are fucktards
Backstory:
So basicaly I am now having a summerjob before my next semester starts so I can make some cash to buy some overpriced stuff I dont probably need. I work at a factory, 3 shift work and today we had Night shift, so there was me and a bunch of Arab guys, kicking our asses by pure boredom and desperacy.
Act One:
I was bored, opened my phone and decided entertain myself by some funny sh!t I can find on Mark Sugarhills webpage. I was just passing by some random a bit funny stuff and then I found some random ass meme, which doesnt give a single, even distant sence to me.. So since my german is as good as my coding skills (read: complete shit) I couldnt ask for opinion of my fellow coworkers and since its fuck1ng 4am theres noone to ask on messenger or whatever. So I did it... I asked in a goddamn comments, what the fck is that supposed to mean and Aw dear Lawd... I did a mistake.
Act 2:
Like 4 seconds after my question I had a response and I was like 0.o It has to be some Alice of Facebook so I guess someone cool. Oh boy I was never so wrong. The answer... the... FUCKING answer was.... "normie."
What the actual fuck?
Like man statisticaly speaking, there is 200,000 people on this wannabe funny site and since everyone is apparently laughing their asses off, I am the motherfucking original snowflake.
But I wanted to play it cool... was like Uhm sorry, I really tried but cant figure it out.
His fuck-me-sideways-with-rusty-crowbar answer was:
a) The joke is hidden in some random thing we created yesterday and decided to call it a culture
b) "u dumb"
Act 3:
I hope that most of you finally guessed it! Its the second fucking answer and oh sweet mother of pain, please find him, BUT thats where I flipped and fucking lost it.
The fucking nerve to speak to me like that u dissrespectful piece of shit. Go watch some Twitch, while I SSH into ur ass and hit u harder than ur mom her forehead everynight when she realises that she could have swallow you dickhead.
Afterthoughts:
I was always worries that my child would like to be a Rapper, or Youtuber...
But today Im adding being some dumb ass meme creator.8 -
fucking "premium subscription" is just a reboot of the "bundling" bullshit from the cable companies.
no i dont really wanna pay 4 bucks to rent a shitty halloween flick for 48 hours that i randomly got nostalgia for, nor do i want to pay an additional 8 bucks a month for your streaming service that i hardly use to begin with to include Starz or whatever.
oh a free 7 day trial will get me access you say? oh but of course you need my credit card first just to verify that im real and then conveniently charge me when i forgot i signed up and keep my money after i cancel.
too lazy to torrent. movie wasnt that great either, so not really worth the effort.7 -
So, I interviewed at one of the biggest investment banks for a role of software developer.
And I can't get over my interview anxiety. Shit it sucks. Breakup has made me really passive.
Anyway, it sucks to be grilled at some stupid problem solving question on a tree. I started the approach, and arrived at a wrong solution. Yeah, fuck it. Cause you always have to have a right answer. Fml.
Any credits for thinking and atleast trying to apply everything I know? Apparently no.
So only way to get hired now, is learn problem solving. * Basic problem solving -_- *
Practice 6 months or a year so you can clear the interview and then go and work on multi fucking threading.
Also, after DS algo, also prepare to answer framework, specific questions, then language specific tricky shit.
Interviews these days be like, trick questions, trick questions and then typical already existing problems on the internet under the name of problem solving.
Will I be eligible for doing multi threading then?
I think I'm depressed!1 -
not dev.
HSBC rejected my request to have my credit card limit increased. I call to ask why and after 38 minutes of holding she comes back and says the system automatically rejected your request because of "poor account conduct" and "unusual activity.".....
w h a t t h e F U C K does that mean???
She was unhelpful in explaining what that meant, and I'm honestly baffled. I've always paid my cc balance in full every month, never went over my limit (in fact, utilisation was almost always below 30%), always had enough balance in my account to cover any Direct Debits, Standing Orders and other purchases (I don't even have overdraft), and my credit score is practically excellent.
Then she proceeds to say that I can try applying again in 3-6 months but she can't guarantee approval. HAH as if. They can suck it.
I moved away from Lloyd's bank because they were shit, and now this. Are all banks this shit?
I sent them a complaint and they said they'd get back to me in 5 working days... let's see.12 -
Procrastinates, wastes time not working; hates himself
Works on a regular schedule, putting in effort and feeling sleep deprived;
Hates himself even more.
Inner self hatred realises something.
Who said my self-loathing was bad for me??? -
I fucking hate environnement configuration so much that I prefer to debug 8 hours straight rather than lose my time and shit for 2 hours on idiotic configuration problems and jump from page to page like a dumbass
"Hey you want that module, download it here !"
"Oopsie, starting from X version of the JDK/JRE this is no longer standalone and directly embedded in"
"Can't find it ? Well I just forgot to tell you that starting from Y version this is COMPLETELY removed from what I just told you to search in and now in another standalone package"
"So now you added your package as dependency for you project, your IDE detects everything well but can't run your code ? That's because it doesn't work anyway, use another method found on the dedicated Github issue which makes little sense and that you have to apply everytime, then sacrifice your inexistent newborn to connect to the 9th circle of hell where Java resides so everything will work"
I knew I couldn't get away using fucking Java and JavaFX3 -
- Started learning python
- New semester's about to start in college
...and laptop got recked.
Shows the post screen and crashes and reboots repeatedly. Tried to fix it and now the display doesn't light up and the Hard-Disk makes screeching noise. I didn't even touch the display. HDD maybe.
Removed the HDD and tried to recover it from my friends PC, but it turns out it was already dead. All my data from 1 month ago is gone (thank god for external HDD) and I cannot learn python anymore cause I don't have any backup computer.
I don't even know if I can afford to get it repaired if they say they have to replace the entire motherboard in the laptop.
FUCK!!!4 -
OMFG. So my isp sucks. Like most isp do now adays. I was watching TV and I was trying to find a specific channel. I look for the channel list online. And oh my fucking God the site is horrible. They have some continuous loading script so I don't have to load all 2500 channels at once. But... It's fucking horrible I got to channel 120 then tries to scroll back up to see if there was a search bar. But guess what... It kept scrolled bg me down. Then I thought maybe if I refresh the page. Nope... It does not send me to the top it sends me to the fucking bottom. Since I can't clear cache on mobile im stuck scrolling up. Why can't they have a site that just fucking works.2
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alright so there's ICWH which means what it means; I call it releasing the dragon, if you catch my meaning.
Dopesmoking aside, I did some wonky Y'UV fiddle to encode RGBA data in that state of mind and because this augmented the compression ratio by a holy fuckton I said great, I'm amazing let's party.
But there was a problem: normal maps. They're not really color data, but rather directions in 3D space *encoded* as color. So my 420 encoder is great for an albedo or diffuse, but not normals.
So, what to do? Well, if we remember fucking vector math, then we know that the magnitude of a unit vector is exactly one -- normalized.
Therefore, we can encode only two elements and only the __sign__ of the third, because if given
d = 1 - ( pow(x, 2) + pow(y, 2) );
then
if(d > 0) { z = sqrt(d) * sign; };
and of course
sign = (z<0) ? -1 : 1;
You lost yet? Good. Normalpacking out of the way, we have the question of ambient occlusion, roughness, emission, metalness, edges, curvature, height, displacement... lots of grayscale maps, so why not pack them together? One map per RGBA channel and you have 2 images instead of 8.
BUT: these maps are ALSO not real color data, they're sort of these funky grayscale masks that we encode as color for convenience. So why not treat them as such?
We can have the code swap out encoding methods depending on the type of image, isn't knowing half a shit about the data convenient? So let's do that and give each individual mask less bits to begin with, depending on how much precision we need. Because if we have a
fac = {some pow of 2 <= 256};
and a
step = 1.0f/fac;
then why not just just fucking
v = clampf(v, -maxval, (maxval - step));
and then
(char) (roundf(v * step);
to force those pesky floats into byte-sized, rich-in-fucking-redundancy fixed point static ranges of values that'll fuck the entropy right in it's highly improbable ass?
Bitch you don't need millions of colors, matter of fact we could get away with barely two or even single bit for stuff like metallic or emission. If you had any idea how much smaller the file size is getting then you'd KNOW I'm going for the lossy compression overkill to get that certified, fucking authentic LOFI vibes.
Post processing, you can suck my mother fucking dick; I get them retro aesthethics for real. Since we're already reducing the color count by enormous magnitudes, let's step it up some more: about time we get into palettes, no?
Also because we're dealing with less than 8 bits per channel for every last value and this is the same for every image, then why not just go all out and pack them together -- accompany the increase in redundancy with increased density of data to make the added size of a dictionary be fucking worth it. And why not just put similar data together and pass THAT through a goddamned deflate?
Who could've thought! Knowing SOMETHING about the DATA makes DEALING with that DATA so very much EASIER! Does that make SENSE to YOU, you FUCKING rectal bleeding, fifty-gigs in size day-one update, anal bleaching lord of object oriented faggotry?
NO 64x64 _grunge-plasttr-wall_albedo06448(Copy).png in my drive shall remain untouched; I am become $:GT0x24;>, master of the pixel!3 -
How fucking sucking difficult is it too setup a static ip in AWS on a loadbalancer??? I spend the whole day figuring out how to use the nat gateway or other means and it still doesn't work. Debugging is almost impossible because they give you zero logs.
And all of this because a client wants to work with a whitelist for their shitty system on location.2 -
Install Adobe suit and your internet will be fucked off. The solution is to find all startup items of com.adobe.* and remove them. I don't understand why they put their files across all system. Adobe: please be normal and act normal. It's 21 century.2
-
Wat up guys. I want your opinions on how to deal with other devs who have less experience but arrogant enough to take advice or even basic instruction making the project take longer, e.g. insist on doing everything from scratch because libraries are too high level etc.
How do you guys end up not murdering these types of people?1 -
!dev
I wanted to take small loan from bank I am loyal customer for 15 years to speed up things by month. I decided to pay money for it.
They have some online form for it and I filled it.
So what happened next ?
I got call to confirm every input I filled (heard keyboard typing every time I answered question).
I asked how long I will wait and got response that it will take couple of hours, max 2 days.
Just received another call 10 days later that they need documents to prove my income.
They got 15 years history of every operation and it looks like it means nothing.
I said to person I will earn this money faster then I get it from them so at this point this conversation is just waste of my time.
It’s 10 days left till end of month and I think it will be easier to just wait or ask friend for a favor.
Yet another reason to say fuck banks.
Time is money.4 -
I checked something and the school I want to apply to for Computer Management (basically the paper I need to prove I’m a dev) requires me to do PE.... Like, come the FUCK ON. How am I gonna learn stuff (and get retold the same shit I know since I’m 10) about PROGRAMMING if I’m doing SPORTS?! WHY?! I can barely get up the damn stairs without my knees fucking up and being out of breath.... fml2
-
So here is an interesting story.
The company that I work went in collaboration with another company and as my company is a small startup we had only 2 employees. We had to do 2 different projects during the collaboration period.
I was put in-charge of an android application (At that time I had no experience of android development and it was one of their most important project without any guidance)
I was doing work of two companies and getting paid by one and I was getting shit from the company that we were collaborating with.
As a developer I value tasks and deadline but the company issued a new rule that I should stay in the office from 9-6 (strictly) which I didn't oppose. But the senior developers here stay strictly 9-6 but work only for about less 2 hours a day and get valued more.
I used to love working on weekends improving myself in the process but working over time is not valued by the company.
( BTW I completed their project in about 1.5 months ) -
What do you hate about software and developer tutorials and how would you change them? What would totally disrupt the status quo with tutorials and make them easier to finish/useful/memorable/fun?6
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So I'm looking at getting a drone to do some videography for commercial purposes. I've been researching all the FAA regulations, dos and don'ts, tips for flying, videography, etc. My finger is hovering over the "buy now" button on BestBuy.com.
But, there's an exam you have to take to certify to fly for commercial purposes that, I thought, was supposed to test you on the Part 107 regulations. I pull up a list of sample test questions from the FAA's own website and it has questions on it that, for all intents and purposes, apply only to MANned aircraft, not UNmanned aircraft. Crap like "What airport is located approximately 47 (degrees) 40 (minutes) N latitude and 101 (degrees) 26 (minutes) W longitude?"
And I'm sitting here like, "WTF! I don't live anywhere near there! I just want to take pictures of some friggin trees and houses in my metro area!"
"Welcome to the FAA website, where we're not happy until you're not happy."3 -
Feature request: if everyone tagged memes and funnies with, say, meme, that way we could have a special feed for those. Some like em, some dislike em, everybody wins!
If a rant is really a meme, and it is not tagged as such, the downvote menu could include a "It's a meme" selection which would promote it to that feed. Whadda y'all say?3 -
Am I the only one who gets stupid nervous for interviews, I always get the hand shakes real bad about T-20 before the interview then they go away about T-5 before the interview. Doesn't matter what I am interviewing for, every time.6
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got two client who have an idea and walk up to us saying we should do whats best for the idea, We took up the project came up with the features and all specifics including deadline and client was ok, later on client says some things dont makes sense and reshaped idea, since we greatly want to increase our custumer base we took the change and of course deadline is altered later on client says the project Is taking long and insist that their change couldn't have caused the change in deadline. What the devil is that for? Well what I did was behave before the client and curse the shit in their lives behind doors5
-
I finally got my Visa sorted out (after 2 months) so I could finally get DevRant++ and as luck would have it the "Darkest dark" theme came out this same week!
The timing couldn't have been better and it looks incredible on my OLED screen!1 -
Recruiters that call you "to have a chat".
I find this more offensive than the ones that call you frantically wanting to talk to you because you popped up on a keyword search that matches one word in your profile.
Why do they do this? I quite often think it's some form of social engineering and am immediately on the offensive because they have called with no clear intent. -
"Bug: IE 10/11 open silverlight when trying to view a MS Office PowerPoint link online"
"Bug: IE doesnt play this 1 video"
The problem is IE right? Not the website or the links? Am I crazy? -
Past me is such a dick:
"Note to future self: this is a dirty hack taken straight from the ONLY StackedOverflow result. Didn't understand it then... "2 -
Soooo I have been taking my learning experience to Hackerrank.com, so that I can give myself some training with actual problems to solve instead of all theory, and today I'm working on one of the Challenges, and and I'm slowly getting it and working at it, then im looking at the code and think man I can clean this up a bit and merge things and make it look pretty! So I slave away and making it look pretty and stuff. I look at the code, all 70 lines of code and I'm so happy with my work. I pressed submit, of course I passed it! I had made sure every bit of my code made sense... After I finish and am so happy, I decide to take a look at what other people answered......
While my answer was 70 lines of code, almost everybody else's was AT MOST 18-20 lines of code!! Uggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Makes me feel like I got a LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONGGGGGGGGGG way to go...3 -
Noob question
Is it better to implement a cryptpgraphic algo in a function or in a class? Also how?
More info:
I have a cryptography class and I really enjoy implementing the different techniques that we study in class. At first I was just implementing the techniques in a simple function with 3 parameters; key, message and a bool for encryption or decryption. But as they are getting more complex, it is becoming harder to continue implementing them in a single function block. So I thought of using a class but ran into the problem of how do I even do that? Do I make different methods for key generation, encrypting and decrypting?
P.S. It's really just for learning how the crypto technique works and not for anything serious.12 -
I tried implementing graph data structure in java. And I reckon it's the most painful code I ever wrote since "hello world".5
-
The worst part being a designer is when your client has zero design sense and you have make them some shiity stuff
-
!rant !!Story
I installed Truecaller and it naturally scraped my contacts information. I realized that anyone now who had not saved my number can search who I am. I didn't want that to happen so I uninstalled Truecaller. But people still saw the name and profile I had created. So I reinstalled Truecaller changed my name and surname to 'Call me to know who I am' and uninstalled Truecaller again. Now it overrides the information so anyone searches for my number and hasn't saved it that's what he'll see.3 -
Random rant: the real ugly thing about dark themed apps is that you can't for the life of you find the taskbar so that you may drag the fucking thing around. (not a light theme guy btw)2
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Thanks Windows 10 April update:
i'm not even mad for using my network on high priority when you were downloading the update or taking 1 freaking hour of my working time to finish the updates just to add spam to my lockscreen and an uglier task view but if you could please at least not f**k up all my Wifi, bluetooth and video driver it would be great!
Still having problem with bluetooth connection and i re-installed drivers several times! -
Aaaah, my delighted daily dose of wonderfully not-written-by-me CSS I have to edit from time to time...
I always feel so enlightened after spending time in those files.
2 -
So I wanted to program a website, but i suck at design... Any tipps for me? I dont plan in employing people6
-
!dev
Why is it that whenever I have a goal, everybody comes out of the woodwork to tell me I'm stupid and am not capable of achieving it, but whenever I do achieve something on my own they expect thanks and recognition for all the "support and guidance" they gave along the way?
Surely this can't be just me experiencing this?2 -
I think the only real constant thing that will never change is code. I can go back to it and the rules are plain and simple, none of the hard grey areas.
-
Are there any other devs out there whose minds go blank when they try to teach coding?
Whenever my friends ask me coding related questions, I just cannot explain it to them. I cannot think of any examples even. And when it comes to explaining the method used by the program, I just end up confusing them even more.
I feel so bad when I cannot help them understand.3 -
So everyone I know that has an iPhone is always mad at it because it randomly freezes or it is slow. I've yet to get my Moto G to freeze or to lag at all. Gotta love almost stock Android experience.2
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I started learning WordPress out of curiosity.
Configuration and deployment was easy peesy.
Site is up and running, BUT
Real challenge is, customize it according to clients requirement.
I purchased paid theme as well. It has theme builders installed to.
But I couldn't make it according to client requirements.
I neither found any resource where I could learn WP site customization.
What I'm doing wrong?18 -
My first job was through a technology "Graduate Training Program" at a large bank. We were sold on the job being told that there would be a month of corporate training before getting to work. You know, stuff like presentation skills and Myers Briggs and actual useful stuff. And yeah, they did have that for like two days of the month.
The rest was the most bullshit work to basically kiss-ass to upper management. Having to analyze their commercials and explain how amazing they were and why (they sucked). Explaining a portion of the business to upper management.. you know- the business they knew because they are executives in it- but it had to be "fun". We were stuck making board games and rap songs to these things to make an ass of ourselves in front of executives.
Then after that I was stuck working on VB6 programming with a Cobol mainframe backend. So fucking awful. -
!dev
did my taxes months ago with the official software. because i was honest enough to mention a 250€ (annually) income for a freelance job i was later forced to submit a form for entrepeneurs. well, ok. let's use the official software for that. "yes we have the form, but no, you are not allowed to use it from this year on, please use our online service"
two weeks later (!) i receive the token to complete registration. while trying to fill the form i recognize german tax system is exactly the recursive piece of incomprehensible shit like the attached help text.
4 -
Programmer at an interview:
interviewer: introduce yourself
programmer: Hi, my name is ______, and am a programmer,
you can actually call me a programmer because from the top I look good, but from the bottom I am naked.
comment below whether you will be hiring this programmer on not.7 -
One manager at the Client company tells us that unless we submit weekly timesheets we wont get paid.
We are not their employees, nor do we have an agreement with them for full time work.
" Whole thought process is to structure the engagement better ,so that we can implement better governance and provide better visibility."
Anyone understand what is being said above? Jargon.2 -
Sigh!..
https://github.com/tombh/novim-mode
Wtf, vim its not about keybinding paradigm, Its about talking to vim.
Why make vim less special?
Why make this vim cancer?
Who using this, u drunk. (Go home...)
(U miss the point of using vim completely)4 -
Vague requirement for feature A received from client
Business consultant refines
Example mapping done
Acceptance criteria defined
Scheduled in sprint
Development done
Unit tests passed
Pull request reviewed
Code merged and deployed to system test
Functional testing successful
Deployed to UAT
Client asked to sign off
Client: "Actually I don't want that feature." -
Just wanna rant about something in general..
I'm quite serious about time commitments. I can't stand people who change their words at the last minute because all these weeks they were just fuckng around not preparing and doing that had to be done.
For fucks fake, we have been discussing every intricate details of things that had to be done!!
And even worse, they expect you to bear the consequence and delay all your plans for their convenience..
:/ -
Epoch 2/4
777/1054 [=====================>........] - ETA: 45:31 - loss: 2.6682
Screw you Keras model1 -
So, I'm on Win7 and can't hop to a LIBRE operating system for the time being, for a variety of reasons I'd rather not get into. This really fucks me.
BUT: suppose I slap a few gigs of Cygwin on this bitch. Does that allow me to, say, go full POSIX?
I mean I've been fucking with stuff from unistd here and there for a while now but I just did a conio implementation by fucking with termios and it runs just fine. So what's the limit? Can I follow this path so that you'll be able to run my code on your disgusting, tryhard re-installed and re-configured eleven times a day, package-manager orgy of weaponized penguin army flavour of I'm on that distro type shit? Either out of the box or with *minimal* changes.
Honestly I don't feel comfortable AT ALL knowing that some bits of my code would only run under windows. Like, fuck that forever and ever. I NEED to write FREE software for real, maan.
This dumbass question I'd never post on actual support boards is sponsored by GNU FMACS. Thanks to Gratitude Nay Ulterior Fuckery Main Autistic Cock Sucker, I got rid of my irrational fear of meeting amish women in dark alleys for the purpose of soliciting prostitution. I am now fully in control of a new, open-minded, proactive & innovative workflow which allows me to blow ALL of my hard-earned cash in cheap pornography and hard drugs. Big up to FMACS for sponsoring this new stepping stone into nigh-homicidal insanity.
Also reclaim_thine_freedom_cause_ama_fucking_zealot++;16 -
me asking python: is (0.1 + 0.2) == 0.3 ?
python: NO
me: wha.!!
python: Instead, it's 0.30000000000000004
me: what the actual F***!!10 -
If someone is proud about using Alpha Five Software for developing... You just upgraded from MS Access to MS Access++... And you suck...
Go and learn some serious PL's and tools...1 -
Hit me with distros to download/test.
I'm already familiar with mint, Ubuntu and Ive already downloaded arch.
Got an extra hdd from a laptop recently and I felt the urge to mess with it5 -
"Get out of the weeds" they tell me.
I try and then every.single.project.goes.red.
Maybe I should just do and stop trying to manage.2 -
You know what grinds my gears?
When someone complains about an issue, then bypasses it and ruins your ability to test. Sure, you can recreate it to the best of your ability, but if the issue is very specific, you're screwed (browser, data in prod, etc). -
What's really the matter with meetings?
I mean, we've all been annoyed at some point by some management person scheduling meetings we think of as pointless but I've actually found myself enjoying going to one where people can discuss and share ideas (dev related, mostly).
Sure, it's not great when you are focused and you have to stop to talk to some assholes sometimes but other times it didn't bother me to think they value my input/opinion somehow.
Surely the reason for their existence is not to make you waste time, right? 🤔1 -
Hey guys/gals!! I just got a recruiter offer me an interview for a job that would be a demotion AND require me to move 5 hours away! Too good to be true!!! As SUPER tempting as this is, I think I have to pass :-(. I know, bummer, right? But if anyone wants this AMAZING job opportunity that will allow you to step down on the ladder of success, let me know!! 🙄
-
Count the fingers on both hands
if it comes 10 then f**k u
else if it is < 10 you are definitely a programmer.14 -
Intelligent Development class (yeah, that's how it's titled), teacher leaves us as first task to develop our own Database, because later we will make it a fuzzy database.
She gave us three days. Three (counting me) in the team. I began working on Interfaces (Java development) and so on, using GitHub for VCS and documenting each method.
This assholes didn't even ask what was missing or what should they do. One day before date, I told them "Hey, I think I can nail the underlying file management tonight, so, work on the language parser, please"
Stood awake until 1 A.M., waiting for their reply, but there wasn't any.
Next day, I'm the only one of the team and I tried to decline the presentation of my work, but a friend encouraged me, because it was my work and I worked hard.
Presentation went better than expected.
After the class, I have another with one of my team members, he asks "How did you do?", "Us? You meant me, because the other prick didn't go".
And that's all, not another single question nor explaining why did he didn't answered the DM's I sent.
Fuck those guys, fucking team of shit, I hate it when you can't pick your team, but I guess that's just a common place for all of us here, isn't it?3 -
Honestly, no bullsh*t
check out these videos:
https://youtube.com/watch/...
https://youtube.com/watch/...1 -
Used XSLT for the first time at work. It seems like it can be a pretty powerful tool in the right situation, but I'm not too happy that I have to use it in the first place.2
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Soo since my last rant on my whole f'ed life last December, life has been going on for a while.
I've been married and FINALLY land on 2 part-time job ( both require on site but time is flexible), so I do both currently. But after 2 month or so, I start to have some problem with my health. I've been working 12 hrs a day, not mentioning average 2 hrs on college classes daily, and my body health starts to weaken overtime.
I've lost 7 kg of weight in a single month and another 5 in the second month. ( Granted I as m obese so this is quite a good thing).
While one of the work still under trial period for 3 months, but sign says that I would asked to stay longer. And I can't afford to stop working bcs I need both salaries to help my little family stays afloat.
Wish me luck
*Btw, oot Question, but had anyone here working with an SDK from Russian based Security video management system named Axxon? If yes I want ask some question regarding their SDKs... -
Arch switch update: after a day I still haven't gotten past sddm. KDE won't start on either X or Wayland with no logs in sight. Everything worked in VB.1
-
Had a hell of a week trying to convince a client that "Case Sensitivity" is a real thing in programming languages.
So there was some typo in some third party code which client had provided which was not giving the accurate results, but the client was not ready to listen. I asked him to get the variable rectified from the 3rd party from
var1 to Var1
But he somehow had a notion in the back of his mind that the 3rd party could never ever be wrong and it was surely I who had screwed up the code and he won't even bother the other team.
He was all like "I don't understand anything remotely connected with coding, but do explain me why is this not working ?" (His exact words)
Me (thinking): umm, WTF !!!
After to and fro for the whole damn week, finally able to convince him ( I guess, still doubtful) after giving the video and link of a jsfiddle showing him all the freaking magic of caseSensitivity! -
Why the fuck are native desktop applications so damn slow when it comes to displaying remote/web contents???
Steam, XBOX/Microsoft Store, Apple App Store/Music are just a few examples. Waiting 1-2 seconds to perform a search, list products, start video playback or just loading a few bytes of text.
Even Internet Explorer destroys them when it comes to loading and displaying data! I prefer every overloaded electron based app over these crutches.
But honestly, why is this?!5 -
All you front end devs who work with dedicated design teams, what's you usual workflow? Do the designers pass on the UI kit with all the assets and dimensions and you clone the thing using whatever stack you're using or do you all decide the specs on the fly looking at the general visual structure of the design?5
-
every programmer can relate...
There hasn't been a single day when I didn't want to stab myself in my chest.5 -
when you code a lot:
walking into Mcdonald,
waiter: sir, please give your order
me:
if big_mac < 5 $ bring("big mac")
else bring("water")2 -
All of these mentioned below are tools used by web developers. Do pin me if I missed something or incorrectly stated it.
0. laptop
1. Javascript
2.HTML
3.CSS
4.MongoDB
5. Typescript
6. Caffeine
7. wtf!!s12 -
Why is it that nobody can seem to figure out you need a god forsaken "cause" field of type Error in your Error class
How is this so fucking hard to understand for language makers3 -
upvote your favorite data structure:
scroll down to comments and upvote the one you love to play with, the most.26 -
Do you know if there are ways for me to use xcode on Windows... Really regret of not buying a Macbook Pro. Seems that next week will have new MacBook for selling.1
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There's time crunch already, we need to finish this feature, this stupid fucking feature, quickly.
We design, and then code and obviously because of Murphy's law, our code doesn't work. Why, you ask. Because some shithead was modifying arguments behind the scenes and it took us fuckload of time to reach this conclusion.
Out of frustration, I made this.
https://github.com/iostreamer-X/...
It's a tiny library which helps you log every single change done to your object.
But seriously, fuck that shithead who modifies things without a care in the world!
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