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Another programming job: the first 5,183 decimals of pi, in wood sticks. Took me three months to do. Now I start e
36 -
Client : Can you make some adblock?
Me : Why? There is a lot of good things already...
C : I mean... Listen carefully.
M : ok
C: i have some google ads and user blocks with adblock
M : yeah, that is normal
C : so i implemented adblock blocker which blocks adblock so that i can show the webpage plus ads when the user disables adblock.
M : i bet users hate that.
C : yeah, so users found out a way to disable adblock blocker which disables adblock blocker which i implemented to show the ads! So i cant earn revenue..
M : so what?
C : Can you make ad block block block block?
M : Sure. How much will you give me ?
C : 20 to 30 dollars
M : great ( the most generous client ever seen)
*couple of years later*
Client : can you make ad block block block block block block block block block block?
Me : i cant understand
C : count the number of block
If there is odd number of block i means to block ads.
If there is even number of block ads, it means to show ads making user to disable ads.
M : so just tldr your request this time
C : even number
M : ok how much will you pay
C : 20 to 30 dollars
*next day*
C : can you..
M : offline
Who in the fucking world made ads, made adblock and made adblock block?15 -
The feeling when you realize the DDoS attacker is yourself because of some stupid JavaScript bug which resulted in an infinite loop which happens to make requests to your server...14
-
Coding essentially is an infinite loop of:
1) wtf
2) ah yea
Add sprinkles of "that should be easy" and "why did i agree on this"6 -
I remember reading shampoo directions as a kid and it feeling wrong to exit the cycle.
1. wet hair
2. apply shampoo
3. lather
4. repeat
I didn't choose development life, it chose me2 -
How come starting a new project is always more appealing than finishing the infinite amount of unfinished projects :'(4
-
!rant
So this year I had a subject at university called "Linux internal architecture", and for the last assignment I had to write a kernel module and interact with it with a separate program written in C.
Once I had finished and tested the driver, I went on to write the other program, which was supposed to use system calls to read and write data to the module. While debugging this program (~500 lines of code) I reached the level of frustration where you just start printing absurd messages everywhere in your code to see what's wrong. So for example instead of printing "This error happened in this function", my error messages were more like "Fuck this fucking function it doesn't fucking work".
Guess who forgot to delete all those messages before sending the code to the teacher...
Also, if a specific mode is selected, the program enters a while(1) that, apart from doing what it's expected to do, also creates a file in the user's home directory called something like 'motherfucker' and appends the words 'fuck this shit' to it. INFINITELY.
I really really hope this teacher doesn't try to run the program in his own computer, or he's in for a big surprise.8 -
When everything has been abstracted..
While I think it's encouraging to newcomers into the field of programming they should always strive to delve into the abstracted details.. The amount of complexity that we deal with 'infinite'.
4 -
I just got this message, until now I thought these pictures are fake.
Looks like I have to start this app, if i want to be ready in time 😄
Human stupidity is an infinite loop...
23 -
How I play mobile games:
-Try to hack it to get infinite $$$, God mode
-Success?
--Yes: play til bored or "finished" (they never finish)
--No: Uninstall
Is this efficiency optimization, maximizing utility, or cheating?15 -
Son: Dad what's a infinite loop?
Dad: I don't know ask your mom!.
Son: Mom what's a infinite loop?
Mom: I don't know ask your dad!.
Son: Dad what's a infinite loop?
Dad: I don't know ask your mom!.
Son: Mom what's a infinite loop?
Mom: I don't know ask your dad!
........ 😒4 -
Infinite loop...
Got a story assigned with no requirements listed this sprint. Since I finished the rest already I was like, lets be pro-active and see what it's about during the stand-up.
Me: Hi, I only have story X remaining, what's it about, there are no requirements listed in Jira?
SM: Yeah person Y is going to reach out to you with the reqs.
Me: Ok, when is Y going to reach out?
SM: Y doesn't have time now, will probably be in 2 weeks.
Me: Ok, so why is the story included in this sprint then?
SM: Because they want X implemented this sprint.
(Me wondering if the Scrum Master is familiar with infinite loops, thinking let's try this out)
Me: Ok, if X should be completed, can Y reach out to me with the requirements?
SM: Y doesn't have time now, will probably be in 2 weeks.
Me: Ok, why is the story included in this sprint then?
Stand-up lasted a lil' longer today... Hope the SM got the message not to assign stories without reqs or clear communication anymore.5 -
I built an infinite scroll module today that loaded in more content when you scroll down. Issue was it sent a request for every pixel you scrolled.
Needless to say, many, many, many Ajax requests were sent to the server. Oops.4 -
Yusuke Endoh: This is a Ruby program that generates Rust program that generates Scala program that generates ...(through 128 languages in total)... REXX program that generates the original Ruby code again.
Me: OH MAH GAWWD! WHY!!
https://github.com/mame/quine-relay
5 -
Confuzzled if I should go the low level way and learn more about software architecture and foundation or go the artificial intelligence machine learning way because I want to get out of this infinite loop of only developing apps!
4 -
FOR FUCK'S SAKE!!!
Stop this INFINITE SCROLL BULLSHIT!!!
Or at least save THE FUCKING position I've been before clicking on an element!16 -
Customer: “How many concurrent users can use this app?”
Me: “web tech is stateless. (Insert explanation) So concurrency is meaningless.”
Customer: “yeah but how many concurrent users?”
Me: “infinite as long as they aren’t interacting with the server.”
Customer: “but how many?”
Me: “400”9 -
Einstein once said: "There are only 2 infinite things, the universe and the 40-day trial of WINRAR and I am not sure about the first one"
8 -
Just noticed on "winehq" that the acronym for "Wine" is "Wine Is Not an Emulator". This is great and all, but all my mind can think about is the infinite recursion problem they've got there.11
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Man it's midnight and all I want to do is work. 5 hours from now I'll be dragging out of bed to go to work where nothing gets accomplished. In 17 hours when I drag in from work I can do real work for 7 hours before crashing while wishing I could just code through the night. It's an infinite loop and I dont know how to fix it!10
-
Okay, just wrote a program with memory allocation inside an accidental infinite loop and by the time I was able to kill it, it had already claimed 86% of my memory. Scared the shit out of me because my OS was CRAWLING for a while3
-
My brother is just like f*cked up program:
Fortnite > Movies > TV Series > Fortnite > Movies > TV Series > F...
Yes, infinite loop and memory leak at its' best.8 -
// to understand infinite loop, see the bottom of this file.
At the bottom of the file:
// to understand infinite loop, see the top of this file.2 -
Making an infinite loop of cat /dev/urandom for anyone trying to login to server via ssh as an April Fool...
But on prod server instead of dev server...3 -
I have that one friend, every time he ask what I am doing and I tell him I am coding, he tells me that he wants to programme too but has no idea how to start.
I always tell him to Duck duck go start programming python/java but he never does...
(I think I somehow created an infinite loop)16 -
.... And it appears my Atom has Entered the Matrix. Full time.
In other news, I successfully completed the E-Commerce App I was working on, even though that Stripe Verification was a ball ache and the bane of the entire project giving me a stupid bug in jQuery whereby it was infinite looping over adding the token and not actually submitting the card charge. Somehow changing my button from using an id to using a class fixed my problem :/ (# -> .)
11 -
Penultimate Progress Loader of Infinite Frustration
Not my own, found at codepen.io
http://codepen.io/raurir/full/...
1 -
Me: can you add x to y?
Dev: sure mate, done tomorrow
Me: kay thx
Next day:
Dev: ok I added x to z! There you go
Me: infinite facepalm4 -
Today I had the pleasure to introduce to my Professor (who teaches Python) that you could cause a keyboard interrupt typing Ctrl-c. Her logic was that "Ctrl-c is for Copy" and the only way to end a infinite Loop in the shell is to, "X out the Window." She also clearly has never dealt with linux or terminals.13
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I just wasted 20 minutes debugging a component that, when included in the parent template, caused an untraceable infinite loop.
Out of desperation, I finally just renamed component to "pants". It works.
...huh?
Renamed back to its original name. THAT works too.
...Huh??7 -
I see too many back-end rants against front-ends.
Should we talk about table layouts, malformed html, programatically generated spaghetti wrong markup, css absurd class naming, infinite div wrapping (div-itis), awful usability, poor legibility, terrible typography, wrong color palettes and user-unfriedly design? To name a few horrors i've seen so far.
Some people won't admit that their contempt against HTML and CSS being 'not real code' actually hides their inability or unwillingness to learn it. Or they need the feeling of superiority.11 -
"please copy these 32767 bytes to VRAM" → infinite bytes copied, entire address space destroyed.
"please copy these 32768 bytes to VRAM" → 4 bytes copied
thank you, TI, for making the shittiest possible routines that are infinitely picky.3 -
My PC died 2 weeks ago. I've been stuck on mobile since and will be too broke for a new machine for an indefinite (though certainly not infinite) period.
It's hell. One can only read so many ebooks and meditate so much.
What's the longest you've ever been without your machine, unwillingly?
Worst part is I was just starting a pet project and now it's on hold!
Pic related, my feels as time drags on when I'm not at work.
11 -
Worst part of being a dev?
For me it's putting myself into infinite loops wrestling with my own self doubt. Is this really how I want to solve this problem? Could this code be cleaner? Surely there's a better way to do this? Am I adding unnecessary complexity? Is this going to come back and bite me in x months? And so on...
In fact, most days I just feel like an imposter.4 -
I understand now! I keep getting ++ on rants I wrote forever ago, and I finally understand the formula to become devrant famous:
1. Pick something that is mildly annoying and at least mildly tech related. For best reception, it should be something widespread, uncustomizable (and or difficult to customize so nobody does), and just mildly annoying so it's not too over played.
2. Post a long form rant, using almost the entire character limit to make this one, insignificant annoyance into a much bigger issue than it is. This is how the mainstream media does it, this is what the people want!!!!!
3. Somehow find a way to shift the blame onto one of the following groups: Microsoft, apple, arch, arch fanboys, arch haters, users, management, the fundamental laws of physics that allow computers to function, or in a worst case scenario start a flamewar (emacs sucks; arch is the best operating system; micro$hit; it's just Linux, if they wanted to call an OS GNU, they would finish fucking Hurd; etc. It's almost too easy)
4. Sit back and wait. You're now internet famous in a tiny portion of the internet. Congratulations. You've made it.11 -
Actual production code:
function isEmpty(val) {
return typeof val === 'undefined'
|| val === undefined
|| !(val !== undefined);
}
I'm starting to think the "infinite monkeys" metaphor is not a metaphor...5 -
God damn it lastpass, how the hell do you get a memory leak and an infinite loop in a fucking browser extension?! Using 7GB of RAM and all 8 cores @ 3,4GHz!!9
-
For fuck sake Facebook! do position:fixed for your goddam toolbar on mobile site because you have that fucking infinite scroll!3
-
Aah my father, programmer, when I was in primary school and he told me "don't be a programmer in life, it's an infinite pain in the ass". Aaah I should have listened to him1
-
I and my mates finally finished the project : a console calculator that manages parenthesis, infinite numbers, the four major operators and also all the bases from 1 to 94
We were not allowed to use stdlib except for malloc, stdio was disallowed too, but we had the unistd write, read and sizeof ahaha
That was a long road of a week but finally we did it :D2 -
For security reasons and to have stronger passwords, my organization enforces us to use '@123' at the end of the password!! Dumb motherfuckers!! :P2
-
We used to write infinite loops with "start cmd.exe" instructions in windows batch, converted it to a executable, gave it an epic vector icon and tried to sell it to 5th graders on CD as "an epic virus that will make your teachers go insane".
And some of it actually got sold.8 -
Infinite loop in real life :/
X: Where is your house?
Y: Near Ramesh's house.
X: Where is Ramesh's house?
Y: Near my house.8 -
Is every fucking government website in the world designed as if only half-dead soul sucked people with infinite time and dedication to decipher the jumble will visit them, or is it just exclusive to India?
Seriously, shell out a few more bucks to your wed-designers. Will save you years worth of frustrated users's curses.. 😡😡7 -
As we all know that yawning is contagious, so if we yawn standing in front of a mirror, does that mean we'll end up in an infinite loop 🤔🤔
4 -
Me: "It's a balance between three things: you either optimize for computation, memory use, or programming effort. Computers don't have a infinitely fast processors with an infinite amount of memory."
Coworker: "Did anybody tell Java?"3 -
Ah, the old locked up non-gui thread. Bastard gets me every time. My monkey brain says "Button still work, so no infinite loop". Oh, but there DO be infinite loop.
-
Is it just me or do GIFs never load? Everytime I'm excited clicking on an GIF but I end up waiting an infinite long time and then have to click away the post...10
-
so the bank has decided to charge me for sending me the sms notification for the sms- notification-charges
makes sense 🤨 ?
7 -
I finally got so annoyed at the lack of infinite scroll on devRant that I just threw together a quick project to have it.
It's called rantReader and is basically just a normal algo feed with infinite scroll.
So, if anyone wants to use it, it's hosted at https://rantreader.privateger.me/.
GitHub repo: https://github.com/PerhapsSomeone/...4 -
Q: How many management consultants does it take to finish a project specification?
A: Infinite. And this is not even funny. -
my code went into an infinite loop of printing "fuck". that happens when u forget to put curly braces and the first line after the if statement is printf("fuck\n");6
-
An infinite number of Rubber Duckys typing randomly on an infinite number of keyboards will eventually create half life 3.
Also, a single Rubber Ducky typing randomly on a single keyboard, left alone and unobserved has both created half life 3 and not created half life 3 at the same time.1 -
I just came across this piece of recursive code, as much as I can guess this should be an infinite recursion but somehow it executes and does terminate. Can anybody tell me how this happens and what will be it's time complexity ?
15 -
Turns out Macbooks with Night Shift set to sunrise/sunset go into an infinite loop near the poles due to the lack of a sunrise/sunset.
https://mobile.twitter.com/austinj/...3 -
Hurray, the stickers are here! Now my laptop's awesomeness and coolness factor has been increased by infinite++!!! 😃
Thank you a lot, @dfox and @trogus!
-
Help, I don't know if I want to code as a job for the rest of my life.
I feel that I miss physical activity in my job. Its just sitting and programming.
I like programming, it's an infinite series of puzzles, and I like puzzles. But more physical would be nice.
Maybe I should find a 2nd job that is more physical and balance the two.
What is everyone's thoughts on this?7 -
You know you did good for the week, when you realize that the infinite loop looking logs you were trying to recreate for the last half hour was in fact caused by how you held your thumb on the side of the thin bezeled device you were inspecting...
Have a nice weekend!1 -
Have you ever been this frustrated?
when you have a ton of bugs to resolve and short deadline to catch and suddenly you get infinite git conflicts because of your co-worker's stupidity..
1 -
*Program crashes*
Colleague looks over my shoulder : While loop?
Me : ...while loop.
It's been two years...my brain just refuses to write non-infinite while loops. I tend to avoid them as much as I can cause every time, without fail, first time I create one I crash something.2 -
Made a backup script today that backs up our site files and database (total size 34gb, we have 70gb storage)
the script takes 1:10 hours to far the website files and backups up the database and somehow when running in a detached terminal because my boss wanted me to run it at 4:20pm when I'm leave at 5:05pm( what could go wrong) it went in a infinite loop and filed our storage.
Our provider just called our boss that his drive is full ( why can you even see that)
Well it will not be a fun morning tomorrow6 -
Why do people think it is weird to have job (programming) also be your hobby?!?
I get annoyed with this kind of people, if I like what I do, and have spent infinite amount of hours enjoying while learning, I think it is normal to have job as your hobby. Or even better phrasing, it is normal to have hobby as your job!!!4 -
every project leader's project is the most important!!!!!!!! not the others!!!!
fullstackclown! do this now!!!!!!
it's apes trying to impress apes, all the way down5 -
while(true){
while(beTired()==true){
goRelax();
}
while(beBored()==true){
goProgram();
}
}
That's a fucking infinite loop4 -
[Me at night]
1 Me: should I sleep?
2 Brain: right after finishing this module
3 Me: <drinking coffee>
4 goto 16 -
!Rant
Being changing apartment this days, I had to continue my personal project on the notebook but soon I realized that I can't, a project that requires full stack programming isn't bearable on a 1440p 14" screen, I need at least 2 screens 😫.
On your side, have you ever stopped working because you needed more screens?3 -
Maybe two days ago I expressed interest in creating a dynamic HTML templating system.
Here's what I came up with. template.js only 34 lines. Which is great because JS is ugly and I want the least amount of it as possible.
The idea is you can create hiddent templates, modify them using traditional means (HTML/ CSS), then generate an infinite amount of them in JS.
Btw: Screenshot is two different images stitched together. There isn't JS and HTML in the same place.
19 -
Google in their *infinite wisdom* has decided the .dev domain they bought should be forced to https in Chrome 63 fully knowing it's a common test gTLD for Web developers.3
-
uni prof: "you can't make an infinite for loop. Infinite loopsnare only possible with while loops"....
I think it's not what he meant, but it was a while ago and I forgot the context, but multiple students made a 'what the fuck?' noise.5 -
My brain goes into infinite loop when an Interviewer asks, what was the hardest thing you did at your job?2
-
*Puts the same music in infinite loop through a whole afternoon of coding*
*Gets tired of the music after 2 hours and a half (my playlist contains some dope musics)*
*Removes the infinite loop to let the next music come*
*Head starts to headbang by itself when the next music starts*
*Puts said music to infinite mode*
*Repeat*6 -
after staring my stupid code for 10 mins, the facepalm. Better even before this my program went into infinite loop cause i had initialized a counter and if(counter<10) WITHOUT INCREMENTING IT. Its 1 am i should sleep.
2 -
In an encryption-module, I had a bug, that caused my PC to crash, every time I tried to encrypt something.
Turns out, the loop, that appends
0-Bytes to the string, to make it Block-Cipher compatible,
Had an logical-bug in its exit-condition, that caused it to run infinitely and allocate an infinite amount of memory. -
This was a while back... Like 20 years ago. I was doing some crappy development with asp/vbscript. Once I had a task to send emails in certain cases and while testing, I used my personal mail as recipient. In a loop. If you ever did asp/vbscript you know how easy it is to have an infinite loop... And my mail was forwarded as text messages to my phone. I deleted incoming text messages for days.
And I made the same mistake next week.2 -
Life can be simplified with code. We're all running on an infinite loop. Eventually, we come across an unexpected bug and crash.2
-
that ankward moment when you generate a javascript infinite loop and you are not able to close or reload the window
-
Actual production code:
while(1):
//A few lines of code here with a conditional break.
while(1):
//More code.
Have you ever just had nested infinite loops...4 -
I love bookstack for quick brainstorming, organizing my own docs, notes about projects, great stuff, it even has a DIA editor alternative right ootb, so I don't have to anymore manage DIA files and do screenshots to import into docs / notes, they are live editable too, where as in the past I had to find the DIA file, edit it, re-screenshot, ..
Just wish it had one subchapter more, since I am migrating from other services that have infinite nesting haha
https://www.bookstackapp.com/
1 -
We are switching to an infinite scroll mode for our app. I told the backend dev in my project (we're just 2 people) I need an API to get more than one post at once.
He told me to use a loop to call the old URL 15 times.
...Not sure if stupid or just too lazy4 -
I was practising Java at my school(they were still teaching POWERPOINT,f**k)
They got themselves 20 shiny All-in-one garbage with Windows 10.
I got my bootable usb Linux with me,and fired up Kali.By mistake my program ran into infinite loop....
And the rest is history,got banned from the lab😭
P.s.I don't have anything to code on ,i write my programs on paper and executed them on the pc at my school,what to do now9 -
The worst infinite loop of all.
while(hasPoopOnTP( )){
if(goodEnough( )){
break; //it's never good enough
}
ass.wipe( );
}1 -
Sometime in the near future…
"Hey Joe, how's the new robot working out?"
"Oh it's great, except that we have no more shampoo in the house."
"…"
"Yeah, apparently it got its hands on a bottle and infinite-looped on Lather, Rinse, Repeat." -
> Be me
> Programming for an embedded system
> It's not interruptable
> Got ISR Fault (Interrupt Service Register)
> WTF
> Breakpoints are useless
> WTF
> Comment out some lines
> Turns out it goes ISRF Infinite Loop because of the multi dimensional array of strings
> WTF
> Use pointer intead of defining actual size
> Works
> WTF
WTF?1 -
int rantLevel = 0;
while(true) {
rantLevel++;
}
Join the army! Create an infinite loop with your favorite language and comment it 🤔29 -
Have you ever had an error or something and start researching for hours and end up with about +infinite tabs opened and suddenly get this kind of raging rampage of closing tabs and yelling to them like a psycho? Like "get the $@&! Out of my sight you $@&!ing useless post that didn't solve my problem!"
Should I go to therapy?4 -
ok so imagine this I am in school waiting for the infinite loading screen on a website to load
so I go into cmd and do the tasklist command and I kid you not the person next to me said are you hacking ME I LITERALLY JUST DID TASKLIST MOFO12 -
About 5 years ago I worked at a small company developing websites and .NET applications.
They haven't changed any passwords which means, I still have access to ALL of their customers DNS setups.
Of course I wouldn't do anything.
But just the thought, that I could make an infinite loop, by redirecting the domains, is amazing.
Or redirecting them to a porn site.3 -
It's 3am, just submitted an app for review for iOS... go to take one last test drive on the release build for android, and I get stuck in an infinite loop of "system up stopped working". An factory reset and an hour later, I'm saying fuck this, android waits, and fuck whatever Xamarin did to my phone. While I'm at it, fuck Apple for making me have 20+ icons in different sizes, and their shitty walled garden approach to a so called marketplace.4
-
Having another "what the fuck was I thinking" moment after wasting 3 wks and $60 on another mobile game...
There's no point to this game... Is an infinite clicker basically...
Must be the alliance element and bring asked to be the temp leader...
I knew I should've declined... now always thinking how to give it back to him...6 -
what percentage of these dune hipsters haven't read a SINGLE word of any of the 6 books in the dune series (yes drooling losers, there are 6 of them)
I'm guessing > 90%
wow congrats you watched a 2 hour film, make it your entire identity 🤡
god the world has become ever decreasing cycles of cringe... they will decrease in time length until we reach unending - and therefore infinite - cringe
FullStackCircus Principle™25 -
I "hate" when apps like dribbble or devRant crash while I am staring / reading some interesting content - which is very far down on the infinite scroll path - and after the crash I have to scroll next few minutes to find it again. 😄6
-
"To-Do List: The Never-Ending Story" 📝
My to-do list is like a magical scroll that keeps getting longer, no matter how much I cross off. It's a testament to the infinite possibilities of coding and the constant pursuit of perfection. -
Was writing a multithreaded program in Java with an infinite while loop (for waiting). The thread was never preempted. Added a print statement inside the while loop and everything started working :/
Now I need to print a stupid message just so the program works :P3 -
I‘d like to work more on my 2D game.
The idea is to make a mix of "Factorio" and "Knights and Merchants".
I’ve already got a decent basis with infinite terrain generation and units that collect resources and store them in containers as items.2 -
It's truly wondrous how far R can propagate shit until it finally gives up.
Looking at the call stack it's been processing increasingly demented bollocks for nine function calls.
Even then it refused to give in. It now appears to be processing an infinite sequence.
I should kill it, but I feel inspired by its tenacity. "This must be crap, but I'll have a go anyway."
Beautiful. A lesson for us all in that. -
There's an angular project at work.
I guess they know about as much about angular as I do (not much)
Because the error page isn't working, so when you get an error, you infinite loop and DDoS yourself.
It actually crashes my (admittedly subpart) desktop.
Guess I'll be learning how to fix that.19 -
Maybe I'm severely misunderstanding set theory. Hear me out though.
Let f equal the set of all fibonacci numbers, and p equal the set of all primes.
If the density of primes is a function of the number of *multiples* of all primes under n,
then the *number of primes* or density should shrink as n increases, at an ever increasing rate
greater than the density of the number of fibonacci numbers below n.
That means as n grows, the relative density of f to p should grow as well.
At sufficiently large n, the density of p is zero (prime number theorem), not just absolutely, but relative to f as well. The density of f is therefore an upper limit of the density of p.
And the density of p given some sufficiently large n, is therefore also a lower limit on the density of f.
And that therefore the density of p must also be the upper limit on the density of the subset of primes that are Fibonacci numbers.
WHICH MEANS at sufficiently large values of n, there are either NO Fibonacci primes (the functions diverge), and therefore the set of Fibonacci primes is *finite*, OR the density of primes given n in the prime number theorem
*never* truly reaches zero, meaning the primes are in fact infinite.
Proving the Fibonacci primes are infinite, therefore would prove that the prime number line ends (fat chance). While proving the primes are infinite, proves the Fibonacci primes are finite in quantity.
And because the number of primes has been proven time and again to be infinite, as far back as 300BC,the Fibonacci primes MUST be finite.
QED.
If I've made a mistake, I'd like to know.11 -
The programmer got stuck in the shower, because the instructions on the shampoo bottle said:
Lather, Rinse, Repeat -
Larking about with my Raspberry Pi again, wondering the near infinite possibilities that I can do with this.
"People who are really serious about software should also try make their own hardware." - Alan Kay
1 -
To explore and collect knowledge, power and wisdom while wandering through the infinite abyss of space....5
-
So I came across this meme and it got me thinking.
We say that if our universe is truly infinite, we are bound to find a place that is the exact replica of our local cosmic neighborhood eventually if we keep looking.
But procedurally generated worlds like minecraft have that determinism to their world structure(with an initial seed to calculate everything) where you can predict how the local neighborhood would look like at any distance, no matter how far.
So would it be correct to say that it's not guarenteed that in a game like minecraft where the world is generated procedurally with a deterministic algorithm, will be such that you can find the exact same local neighborhood from one seed in any other seed?
18 -
When the infinite layers of upper management and committees don't trust the ones in the battlefield, are too paranoid and disconnected from reality. They are the ones blocking and preventing the release.
Otherwise, we devs are on schedule, almost no bug left. -
So I broke my beloved Fedora Dist. instead of doing a little "sudo chmod -R 754 ./" on a development folder, I did it on root folder ( / )
Now, OS crashed, and I'm getting infinite loops when booting.
But I'm not even mad. I'm impressed :o
7 -
It never ceases to amaze me just how big 64 bit memory space is. It's so unrealistically big that on contemporary processors you can't address the middle and the size of that dead spot (the number of high bits that must be the same in a valid address) is barely worth mentioning.1
-
Mysql won't start after windows update. - I don't have to say anything more to display my infinite hate.2
-
Release:
1. with all features
2. on time
3. on budget (budgeted resources)
Choose two. Maybe just one. If you try to do all, you may not get any.
Whenever I'm asked if something is possible, I've resorted to responding "With infinite time and resources, anything is possible"2 -
And here it is, the infinite monkey club
https://www.infinite-monkey.club/
This is a crooked version of the infinite monkey theory, which is much much easier to accomplish.
Maybe the monkey will succeed before I die7 -
I have this irrational cringe every time that people say infinite when they actually mean unlimited. I hear and read it everywhere, multiple times per day. In English and in German.
"You can do this infinitely often"
"AI bots have infinite APM"
"The number of items you can store is infinite"
Aaaaargh! Stop it! It hurts! 😫22 -
Well ... a few minutes ago i tried to make a discord script wich is changing my status from idle to dnd to online and so on, in an infinite loop, all good until i checked Task manager and saw how much memory is using. my bad i guess in the way i wrote everything
-
Just noticed github shows Infinite contributors for chromium repository. (https://github.com/chromium/...).
Also, I clicked on the contributors tab and the page is still loading. Guess it will take infinite amount of time to finish loading :?
3 -
How do you effectively kill all the cloned processes when you accidentally called fork() in an infinite loop before the computer starts to freeze?6
-
Only four things are infinite , The universe, Human stupidity, The no. of functions and properties in CSS and JS, AND WINRAR's TRIAL PERIOD......
11 -
The power of scrolling keep amazing me it’s not about fucking content, not about what fiends shared or about interesting shit, it’s about infinite scroll motherfuckers, people are simple as fuck.4
-
As a developer with adhd, some days are just wasted and ends with the brain getting stack overflow from to much unorganized code and infinite callbacks 😂
$brain = new adhdBrain;
while($brain.energy > 0) {
$brain->checkSocialMedia();
$brain->work();
$brain->readNews();
$brain->getAngryWithSoundsInTheOffice();
$brain.energy--;
}
public function work() {
$brain->getAngryWithSoundsInTheOffice();
$brain->readNews();
$brain->code();
$brain->readEmail();
$brain.energy--;
}
public function getAngryWithSoundsInTheOffice() {
$brain->readEmail();
$brain->angry++;
$brain.energy--;
}
public function readEmail() {
$brain->work();
$brain->readNews();
$brain.energy--;
}
public function readNews() {
$brain->work();
$brain->getAngryWithSoundsInTheOffice();
$brain.energy--;
} -
Q. Why are the arrays that Chuck Norris declare, of infinite size.
A. Because Chuck Norris knows no bounds.7 -
I hate code imperfections. I have a cookie which is linked to a permanent user setting and I was looking to make it infinite, but I was disappointed to find out the best option is Cookie.setMaxAge(int seconds), so I put Integer.MAX_VALUE, and I'm not as disappointed anymore.
5 -
I understand risk aversion and fault tolerance and verification. But you have to realize mister tester and systems lead guy, WE DON'T HAVE INFINITE TIME!!! Gods damn, seriously. You can't keep pushing the schedule. Eventually we have to ship. That's, you know, how we get paid.
-
So I'm writing a function in Unity3D that walks a rectangular grid. At one place in the code, I got the x+y coordinates backwards, which caused the function to infinitely loop between two coordinates.
Not seeing a way to kill the loop, I looked it up on Google. The suggestions I get are. . .
1. You need to kill the Unity3D task and lose your edits because the environment and the player run on the same thread.
2. You can pay ten bucks for an extension that lets you break out of infinite loops.
3. You should really avoid writing infinite loops. That's just bad form.
SERIOUSLY?
1 -
Have Pocket app.
Save awesome article/site to Pocket.
Swear to read it later.
Open pocket app after a while.
Shit so much saved.
Can't read all of this no time.
Thus begins the infinite loop.4 -
A formal systems modeler that iterates all provable theorems given the rules of the system and your premises. This would be completely and utterly useless since it doesn't aim to answer any specific question, just tries to answer every possible question. Since any meaningful formal system is pretty much guaranteed to have infinite provable theorems, this is really just a computerized automated fidget spinner
-
Gooooooo awayyyyyyy
All I wanna do is play my Chinese grill cartoon games of infinite dodging in peeaaceee
And while you're 100% complete why don't I just go down and make some tea and come back for you to still be 100%,as they say, "" complete ""
-
I guess you could say that my speciality is cloud at scale. I’d say it chose me more than I chose it.
Looking back on it though, I think what I like about my speciality is the unique challenges it brings.
Every speciality has its own set of challenges, like tight resource limits in embedded, or client-server synchronisation in native/mobile.
The challenge of cloud at scale is throughput. Designing systems that can support 100K users making a bazillion requests a second, or a data pipeline firing events that you need to process in near real time without dropping a single one.
The real challenge of course is doing all this within a sensible budget. We have virtually infinite compute but we dont have infinite dollars to spend on it.
Its a fun problem to solve.3 -
Is there any solution to the “Preparing Automatic Repair” error in windows?
It has gone in an infinite loop.
I have Lenovo Ideapad 300.7 -
Alright so
I made an infinite post board.
Infinite in the sense that every post will be on this board, spiraling from position 0 0
I haven’t got a domain but here’s the address:
138.197.71.184
Not built for mobile and may later wipe data because it’s still in testing phase
Anyone who wants to register and leave a post is welcomed to do so10 -
Video game. Nothing but a final boss fight right from the start. Boss has infinite health. There is no time limit. If you die in the game, you die in real life.
That's what it's like to live with bipolar disorder.
For the love of god PLEASE keep yourself away from emotional stress and trauma. -
I thought this was gonna be so simple, now I'm going down an infinite rabbit hole of technology and concepts I have no idea what's for and zero clue of what I'm doing.4
-
Every developer thrives to be the best. But, it's not only the skills, hard work or knowing infinite languages makes you the best. It only makes you the good.
Along with skills, hard work & the languages, the best one needs to have those instincts about the possible solutions to a problem and ability to decide and implement the most efficient solution cleanly in least amount of time.
I'm thriving to be the best. Are you?3 -
I'm now caught in an infinite loop on this project. The tests all pass but the identical code on an identical Live environment won't work. The API vendor is saying it's our code's fault and they won't support us. The developer is ignoring my pleas for assistance because the client won't pay for more of his time as they consider this warranty work even though we warned them that this was a one-of-a-kind custom job with a risk of failure.1
-
Basic requirement of every Data Science college internship:
1) 2-3 years of experience... God damn it
2) Research and publications...(yeah right! in 2 years of college in which you taught me how to "work with" C on Turbo-C... I should have god damn publications... Well worked my ass on and have 2, but guess what campus internships says.. " no fucks given man", solve those damn segment tree question first then we will talk)
Its an infinite recursive while loop
FML -
Found an infinite loop in SQL. One proc called another and then that one called the other. Woooooo.....
-
Sins? All of em'.
Infinite loops of recursive callback carnage, just because I like to watch it burn. -
Talk about giving me a headache..
Mmh k, so i want to move my current domain to cloudflare.
Go to current provider, their site report a previous provider has the record but that provider says they have nothing left.
Great.
Contact current provider and they tell me to contact cloudflare, cloudflare tells me to resolve that issue with my previous provider....
Starting to feel like just dropping it and getting a new ... -
You really have to decide between a full feature set of a software and deadlines. You cannot have both or in other words if you wand all features of your dreams you need infinite amount of money and time.
The funny part about this is that every student learns this in the first semester if you study anything about project management or management at all... And of course in reality pms and cXos don't even give a **** about this...
Sometimes been a software developer just made me sad 😔.3 -
I made an infinite canvas whiteboard app specifically designed for quick notes with pen input but now I want to scale it to something bigger: a tool to allow children with DSA to take notes and study better using images, videos, gifs and sound directly into the canvas, right next to their notes.1
-
What's your first instance of a infinite loop which ended badly?
Mine was a loop to calculate prime numbers.
My computer came to a halt within 5 seconds :S4 -
literally everything, with infinite time to spare. (this is another reason why immortality sucks cock, btw)2
-
Fuck angular.
Syncing formControl errors?
Fuck you. Infinite loop.
Debounce formgroup validator?
Fuck you. We clear all asyncValidator errors on every change12 -
Wk210
My hero is Matthew McConaughey from 10 years in the future. That Matthew McConaughey's hero is another Matthew McConaughey 10 years further in the future, who's hero is 10 years further still. It's infinite recursive Matthew McConaughey to the end of time.
What I'm trying to say is my only hope is to crash this simulation and end my depressing non-McConaughey existence.6 -
Setting up some CSS animations and ended up with the value "infinite ease" and now I am having an existential crisis.1
-
I'll never finish this shit!!!
Whenever I close a task I end up creating one or two more I found in the way, it's like an infinite rollercoaster of technical debt and perfectionist-me throwing work at myself.1 -
bad APIs lead me to leaving comments like this
```
// we do not know how many pages their may be.
// im thinking of space invaders here, reverse direction and increase speed!
// only we are just adding one and creating an infinite loop that is only infinite until it isn't```1 -
So I start up the Windows Upgrade Assistant to upgrade my Windows 10 to the anniversary edition and it shows me that I'm running version 10240 and I can upgrade to the latest version 14xxx.
So I hit upgrade now, wait for 10 minutes for the update to be downloaded and another 10 minutes for the update to be installed. Then it does the customary reboot after update.
So now I assume that I'm running the anniversary edition of Windows 10 but it shows that I'm still running 10240.
WTF was the upgrade assistant doing in those 20 odd minutes. And now it does it in an infinite loop. Is Microsoft trying to explain me what an Infinite loop looks like practically.2 -
I’m still thinking about doing one of my old idea, which is an infinite posting board. But I guess I have to ask the hard question: is it useful?
Please people let me know15 -
I started to learn coding at school using RM Basic. I made a script with an infinite loop using goto that flashed the screen different colours and said error on it. I left it running. Found out later the it guy took the computer away for "repair"...
-
Cobol / Mainframe, create on your computer then ftp to server to compile and run (and hope it doesn't crash the cobol region due to infinite running) then ftp to get the output.
-
Do you think we can, one day, teach an AI it's own coding language and make it improve itself to a point where it can code better versions of itself in an infinite loop until the perfect AI emerges? 🤔3
-
Writing a x-platform cli tool in Go designed to be an infinite REPL until EOF if no arguments are passed. Code works great on Linux and Mac as-is but not on Windows. On Windows it only works at all if args are passed.
WHY.
And people wonder why I don't like Windows. It's a shame my userbase has so many tech-saavy Windows users. If not for them I'd cut that git branch off the repo in a heartbeat. -
So two weeks ago I said I want to make a website
After 9 days of working 9 hours per day I’m finally done with the basics. It’s a website that’s basically an infinite post board
I’d want to invite people here to test it but I’m also afraid that there might be people just attacking my server. So now idk what to do4 -
So does devrant save all your rants?
Apparently I'm super narcissistic and enjoy reading my old rants and the responses to them. A lot. And I'm browsing through, clicking, reading all the old comments (you guys are really great, I love reading your comments) and I realize at the bottom of the list of my rants theres no pagination, no infinite scroll. It just ends at the bottom.1 -
Newton's first law integrated into work estimation:
For every simple task there is a complex solution which devs will choose and it will take an infinite amount of time, unless acted upon by an unbalanced force.
where "unbalanced_force" belongs to the set union of ["managers", "POs"] and "anyone else who doesn't even work on that project".1 -
Be it public parks, or airports.
Be it people bitching about a perfectly good cup of coffee/chai or people snoring in a library.
If not for my earphones, I would be exponentially ineffective each day, and melt down in a blob of exhaustion.
I become such a infinite source of all peace after I plug my earphones in and it continues for some hours after I take them off.1 -
Studying. I decide to study for an exam and not only the "coding-zone" is here, but I have an infinite amount of new ideas. Yesterday I fixed some old bugs in the matter of 30min, did some piece of working code for chrome-like notifications in 10min (working, not pretty) and today passed the exam. Slept 2 hours though.
Brain is insane, what do you want to hear... -
The infinite profile view is coming along nicely! Right now, I am still building the infinite scroll view but it shouldn’t take long. When I’m done with that, I’m starting to implement minimum functionality. Then, the avatar editor.
-
Going through a cosmic conundrum where I am starting to question the very existence of time fabric and possibilities of parallel universes having infinite us...
P.S.: when you have watched enough of Rick & Morty 😂7 -
while(projectManager === isAlive) {
me.work();
(!isAlive) ? new.projectManager : me.keepWorking();
} -
My life:
Int main(nothing){
while(1){
drink(beer);
code(c);
sleep(the_next_time);
}
return 0;
}
/* compile error -infinite loop found- */ -
Getting the angular interceptor working the way I want has proven to be a pain for me. I try to update an auth token, which returns a promise that has to be transformed to an observable again. based on that, redirect to a login page, in case of 401. But nothing works! Either infinite page reload because of the login() promise function of the auth provider or no reaction at all after a router redirect. 😤4
-
I've determined a simple formula for how to get people to stay in your app for long periods of time:
1. Infinity scrolling
2. OPTIMIZE BATTERY USAGE
Why? You can't infinitely scroll if your battery's dead.
Case Study: YouTube.2 -
whats that? where have you been phazor? gaming! i took a break off of coding! and went to play some games!
minecraft 1.17, muck, rust, farcry 5, ailen isolation, bioshock 1, 2 and infinite, even some geometry dash
after that i decided to come back and relearn html and css because if anyone who wanted to hire me i bet they would ask for a website first and see plain buttons and a depressing web page! -
sorry for not ranting but im quite anxiously looking for a talk about Domain Driven Design. I think it was from Eric Evans but the ones I found yet arent it. he has a very speqking example of shipping which he usus throughout his talk, speaking in front of quite a big crowd, interacting with the crowd and no desk or anything in front..... Is there anyone who knows which talk I mean? Infinite kudo's to he who does!1
-
This will sound silly as I was a 6 yo back then. My father had got a computer for doing some office work. He used to do a lot of the stuff using MS Word. I loved seeing the Pipes screensaver marvelling at the infinite combinations of pipes. But, what got me the most excited was Clippy, the infamous Office Assistant. I started using computer just to play around with clippy. Right click, do a trick and stuff. Oh the memories...1
-
worst mistake was probably introducing an infinite loop in the category tree for e-commerce site...
in the vein of true agile and considering MVPs and what not we had not yet automated everything. the client would send category updates as a spreadsheet and i had a script to generate the sql and jam it into the site. having run the script several times in the past I thought I'd just throw the update into production and call it a weekend...
it wasn't long before I started fielding calls that the site was unstable. no page would load and the server kept crashing under trivial load. well an entire frantic weekend later I discovered the category load hit an edge case I hadn't considered and I had introduced an infinite loop in the navigation of the site.
i'd like to say I learned my lesson and never just threw changes into production again, but what can I say - I like living on the edge. I did however learn that loop detection can be a valuable thibg -
What if you could hack devrant or go back in time and write all of the posts in the all-time section of "top rants"...
While (true) {
Rant_points = Rant_points*2
} -
To the physicists among us:
I'm in the process of planning a very lightweight mini drone that flies with the help of radio signals that's surrounding it.
I'm targeting 100 MHz.
I calculated the amount of energy (Joules) of it and just when I did change the formula from E=h*f to Power=E/time I realized that time is basically going to be infinite and now I am stuck finding a solution to this.
I can't just use a potential infinite amount of time in this equation and need a workaround.
Any help is appreciated.22 -
there it goes again
rip my college access, i'm in an infinite loop of this and can't break out
i have to wait for the server to deauth me on its end, should take 48 hours or so
2 -
Fellow Android users:
Is there a live wallpaper which downloads images from a RSS feed and low-poly-ifies them, somewhere in the infinite wilderness of the Play Store?
There are a few low-poly wallpaper things that I've seen, but none with RSS.4 -
I just noticed something.... I think I read more rants if they're displayed in pages with a scrollbar instead of infinite scrolling in the app.
Guess the rewarding feeling of reaching the end of a page helps? -
difficulty in reproducing bug behavior
think i found a solution to prevent the infinite requests being sent by a react component who's code keeps getting rerun by react's scheduler.development.js
i have no fucking clue what's going on, on top of not having any foundation in react3 -
All the night thinking about a possible solution, finally got it, code it, push and went to sleep some time, then I realized it didn't deploy and doesn't actually run ._. almost cry, and then I realized the error was that i was using the wrong variable and forcing an infinite loop .___.
-
"I don't think it's a good idea to do that."
Translation: "Your idea makes the once infinite calm on the planes of my soul, feel a level of rage that will end all living creatures, known or unknown to mankind"
-
When C output questions to an Interview seem like an infinite loop,
But end up simply getting solved on the nth iteration.
And you feel like, if this was in python, this load of crap won't be torturing you! -
I fucking hate what Google Feed has become. Is the Google Feed team composed of infinite monkeys on infinite computers trying to churn out the worst possible user experience with each update? Adding to the existing clusterfucking mess of unswipeable cards and unintuitive tabbed design that is inconsistent all over Android, they are now testing fucking Ads on the feed. Fuck Google Feed. I miss the old Google now cards. Listen to your users!
-
Posting here so everyone can tell me if they have the same problem. I can't scroll through older notifications, so I get stuck with notifications in the end since I can't read them (outside the limit fetched). I think @dfox should implement infinite scrolling like on the Rants screen.
Do any of you suffer from the same problem?
-
I've wasted hour to fix bug in my program.
Basically there was problem with auto updates system (two exe files - one is program itself, and another is update Manager which replaces old exe with new one).
I've managed to make bug which causes to infinite update loop...
The problem was instead of calling program "helmet_updater.txt", it was calling "helmets_updater.txt"... -
floating point numbers are workarounds for infinite problems people didn’t find solution yet
if you eat a cake there is no cake, same if you grab a piece of cake, there is no 3/4 cake left there is something else yet to simplify the meaning of the world so we can communicate cause we’re all dumb fucks who can’t remember more than 20000 words we named different things as same things but in less amount, floating point numbers were a biggest step towards modern world we even don’t remember it
we use infinity everyday yet we don’t know infinite, we only partially know concept of null
you say piece of cake but piece is not measurement - piece is infinite subjective amount of something
everything that is subjective is infinite, like you say a sentence it have infinite number of meanings, you publish a photo or draw a paining there are infinite number of interpretations
you can say there is no cake but isn’t it ? you just said cake so your mind want to materialize something you already know and since you know the cake word there is a cake cause it’s infinite once created
if you think really hard and try to get that feeling, the taste of your last delicious cake you can almost feel it on your tongue cause you’re connected to every cake taste you ate
someone created cake and once people know what cake is it’s infinite in that collection, but what if no one created cake or everyone that remember how cake looks like died, everything what’s cake made of extinct ? does it exist or is it null ? that’s determinism and entropy problem we don’t understand, we don’t understand past and future cause we don’t understand infinity and null, we just replaced it with time
there is no time and you can have a couple of minutes break are best explanations of how null and infinite works in a concept of time
so if you want to change the world, find another thing that explains infinity and null and you will push our civilization forward, you don’t need to know any physics or math, you just need to observe the world and spot patterns10 -
When I die, if I’m not going to go to the infinite thick gooey ocean of black void with the infinitely long version of “Whole New World” by SOPHIE playing, then I’m done. I’m killing myself.
2 -
How could one write a parser for BNF without causing and infinite loop in the following case:
Something ::= AnotherThing|Something
?6 -
Not finding what I want via google so I'll ask here: What's the deal with opengles android shaders freezing my phone's screen?
Is it normal unavoidable behaviour for a shader with an infinite loop to fuck up the visual output irreversibly (until phone restart)? -
I was contacted through Linkedin by some HR people, trying to seduce me for an interview for a position they have opened.
Among the benefits, they say, and I Quote
"the possibilities of growth* are infinite"
wew that's a lot of possibilities
* I assume they are referring to a professional career1 -
With all this uproar about MS taking over github I’m so glad I decided to go self hosted. I’m currently using gogs.io and have been for the past year or so. Granted it doesn’t have all the features that github/bitbucket does, but it’s also free for an infinite amount of users/private repos.2
-
My first day at my first job.
I am super hyped. Now I like be like Mario under a hidden infinite coin's brick, siphoning knowledge from better than me.
First project meeting :
- (CTO) OK, Lets copy paste everything needed from our last project and tomorrow we start development
And this is how we created a new project in ancient toolset2 -
I wanted to add the rewrite_module to my apache-Server on my Mac.. Then the Website loads infinite. I commented it back out, restarted and it don‘t works even then.
I started laughting because Errors started to appear before starting with anything. 😂 -
Infinite loop definition: when you post on devRant the stickers you received from devRant and you get upvotes, so you can request more swag from devRant that you then post again on devRant.
-
I wouldn't be surprised if JavaScript reached the maximum allowed stack size without needing infinte recursion2
-
IF I see something infinite and more than three.
and never more than three in real world.
I use recursion.
because who knows, people are crazy.
myself included. -
So there’s this theory that given infinite time with infinite monkey typing, eventually they will type out the entire Shakespeare
I explained to my gf, I thought it was obvious but she said it’s not possible, and I had to emphasize that’s why it says infinite time.
Well then I thought, I’m gonna make a website where every x seconds it will type a character, and anyone on the website can also type one character every n seconds, and everyone will see the same sequence, on the side panel I will show what words those monkeys actually typed and maybe eventually, we can type out Shakespeare
But it’s also quite boring, tell me what I can do9 -
1) After many years of development the thing that grew the most is my capability to troubleshoot much more easily most issues, both physical or virtual, with greater enjoyment from such accomplishments.
2) The power to create something from nothing is a great feeling, especially if you keep on personal projects and most of your dev passion you keep it outside the working environment.
3) Career paths can easily be opened in case you live development as an infinite cycle of adaptation and improvement.
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