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Bored, stuck in a long ass meeting. When suddenly someone brings up the program I made. People start complementing it.
Today's gonna be a good day.
4 -
I remember that one time I accidentally copy-pasted a pornhub link instead of a trello card's to my commit.9
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I broke up with my Girlfriend at restaurant and She started crying, everyone thought i had proposed so they started Clapping. 😂🤣😎13
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That awkward moment when you don’t want to come out of your room because there are strangers in your house.6
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Today my manager asked me about my research into using RabbitMQ as a backup in case Azure Service Bus ever goes down.
Me: "Good. The way we designed the framework, all we have to do is drop the DLLs into the directory, update the config, and the services will start using RabbitMQ."
Mgr: "Excellent. Probably should be looking into using RabbitMQ as a permanent replacement for Azure"
Me: "What? The whole reason we moved to Azure was to eliminate the problems with having an on prem service bus. Since we've switched, there has been zero downtime."
Mgr: "That's what VP-Joe is afraid of. If Azure ever goes down, he won't know how to explain Azure to the president as to why we're not taking orders or can't ship packages."
Me: "That makes no sense. What did VP-Joe tell the president when a database goes down or a server mis-configuration?"
Mgr: "President understands internal outages, its just the whole 'cloud' thing he doesn't understand."
Me: "Um..then VP-Joe needs to explain it to him?"
Mgr: "The decision has already been made. Are you on board? Lets look at this move as a cost savings."
Me: "You mean the $10 a month? How much hardware will we need to support RabbitMQ?"
Mgr: "Yea, nobody probably thought of that."
Me: "I'm on board with whatever decision, but I'd like a little more than VP-Joe being afraid of the president."
Mgr: "I'm sure its not being afraid."
Me: "..."
Mgr: "OK, lets wait and see if VP-Joe forgets about this and moves on to something new."5 -
This rings so true. I'm a full stack backend engineer except it was today I managed to vertically align something in css🤣 which are you?
10 -
Overheard this today.
Client: I've tried running it but the batch file isn't working.
Tech: You're a batch file.3 -
The awkwardly embarrassing moment when you realise your junior, a fresher out of college, knows more than you... Shittt... Why kids are so fucking smart these days!!! I'm looking for a place where I can go and just hide from the world. If you know one, please help.11
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When we published our first game like Portal 2 mod in Apr 2016 and had the lead (female btw) developer of the largest Portal 2 mod let's play our small mod and say "pretty good, fun to play!"
Today >1100 downloads. <35 -
How tf does these even make sense?! That's a fucking sledgehammer and large metal chisel on fucking steroids. If your parents don't know what the fuck those are and realize they have nothing to do with fixing a relatively flimsy box (in comparison) they probably need more than their WiFi fixed, but since they managed to fucking raise you, I doubt they're that dumb. I get that parents might not always understand technology, but shit, at least respect the fact that they survived without the Internet, which you probably couldn't do...
3 -
I once encountered a developer who said "make your code obscure and only you can understand, so that they(company) will never let you go" bcoz you the only one can solve it. WhatTheFuck!?9
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Currently, a classmate and I are working on our technical thesis.
It is all about industry 4.0, IIoT, big data and stuff.
This week, we presented our interim results to our supervisor. He is very pleased with our work and made the following suggestion:
He thinks it would be awesome to publish our work on our own GitHub repository and make it open source because he is convinced that this thesis is able to kind of "set a new standard" in some specific fields of using big data analysis in production processes.
I guess I'm kind of proud :)4 -
that moment, ...when your cat jumps on your keyboard while coding und you quickly open notepad to see whats she gonna tell you...
cat: ">Asbaw5nz 35im63g fs gha weasd fafhtdj"
..oookay, ..and how do i compile this?5 -
If I hear anyone utter the words "technical debt" one more time, I swear to God, I will fucking kill them :-/
It's your fault your design smells like piss in the first place. It's your responsibility to fucking fix it. You can't just sit on your arse all day, coming up with new, "innovative" ideas that will build up more technical debt :-/ it's making the life of everyone around you, a big, irreparable mess.10 -
Wasted 7 hours for this:
import moment from 'moment'
Should be:
var moment = require('moment')
What happened? When app running in debug mode all is working without issues! When generating release APK, it crashes when using moment
Fucking hybrid shit apps...13 -
!rant
Just wrote my first piece of code using neural networks. Even explaining it to people is fun: "So you wrote a program that writes code?" "Exactly!"3 -
!rant
just wanted to share with you guys,
instead of spending 1hr writing shitty code to fix a bug quickly, i just spent tha last 10 fucking hours and finally fixed it
I'M FUCKING PROUD OF MY CODE, IT BELONGS TO A MUSEUM9 -
*doing the happy dance*
🕺💃🕺🎶🕺💃🕺🎶🎶🕺💃🕺
IT WORKS!! It finally WORKS!!! For the first time. AND IT WORKS!!!
```
^s^s^s^s^s^s^s
git add .
git commit -m 'IT WORKS!!!!'
git push origin
git push backup1
git push backup2
```
*continues with the dance*8 -
Embarrassing moment day 2.
I push a fix for a bug just to introduce another more severe bug. (Checkout after payment hanged ~15s)
Freaking out because it's on production. Turn to my lead for guidance, he writes back idk you fix it, you created it.
Found the issue extended from improper class that a function was called again and again that caused a recursive flow.
Fuck me this is a bad week6 -
One of the embarrassing moment for me..
Whenever some colleague pings me whenever I was busy coding I would reply "1 sec", finish whatever I was doing then talk to them.
But what happened one day was I sent "1 sex" instead to couple of the colleagues... When I realised it was very embarrassing..
Since then I have stopped using "1 sec" and use "1 min" instead.1 -
So my teacher wanted to play a movie cos the class got good test results, and so she asked me how to play a movie on her laptop and get it on the TV and this is how it went down...
Teacher: Sukhi, do you think you could help me.
Me: Yea sure, what do you need help with
Teacher: So I want to play a movie tomorrow but I don't know how to get it up on the TV
Me: Oh its easy just get a HDMI cable and plug your laptop into it.
Teacher: Oh yea I have like 6 of those. Ok then see ya tomorrow.
*The next day*
Teacher: Hey Sukhi, heres the HDMI cable. *Pulls out a AUX cord*
Me: *laughing and crying at the same time*2 -
!rant
Had a meeting with the head of my department concerning the status of many of our current projects. Them projects are huge and it is 2 dedicated devs(me and the lead) working on them whilst training our CMS admin in development to help out(dude is talented af and really digs programming) and my manager was so worried about what he was gonna say.
The thing is, she doesn't know how to take a break, she never pushes us, but she does push herself and it pains the team to see her take so much heat. She really is a bomb manager, and we want her to be more at ease.
Well a couple of days ago the vips of the board decided to bombard her with shit since out dptmnt head was on sick leave. The stress they put on her was some military grade bs and even then she never...EVER took it out on anyone.
The head of our department walked in to talk to us about it. Dude is a tall older gentleman, suits up every day(Texas style meaning cowboy boots and everything) and is quite imposing. Has a stern look man, one of them 1000 mile stares and a huge mustache that more than surpasses mine(which mind you, my mustache is fucking outstanding)
Our boss walked into the meeting room, sat down and heard what she had to say, she was not excusing herself. As bomb as this gorgeous woman is she was all about telling him what we were going to show the board on next week's meeting.
He sat there quietly listening to her as well as the presentation that me and my boys had to do.
What happened next blew me the fuck out of this world.
He said that he was sorry that so much stress had come down to her and us whilst he was gone and that he was happy with the leadership showcased by her and the initiative that the team took to put forward a presentation for him and the board. He also said that he was going to make said presentation for us since the vips had no business stressing us out, he asked for our assistance for any of the technical stats since even though he was a programmer he is not aware of all the inner details of our apps. He said that it is commendable that such a small team can hold 2 campus(college level) and that he was aware of the technical proficiency of me and the lead and that he knows that our shit is not something that gets done overnight.
He then said that at any given time that we get antagonized by matters such as timeframes or shit like that that we can direct everyone to him, regardless of what.
.He was also really amazed at the progress we showed him on the current projects(most are on their respective testing phases).
He then reiterated on how proud he is of all of us before biding us a good weekend and leaving to his office
As i sat there watching how the world was lifted from my manager and happy that he enjoyed the progress of my work I could not help but feel a deep sense of admiration and respect for this mysterious man.
I would damn skippy take a bullet for him....just in case my draw gets sloppy that is, ain't no one taking aim at the boss.4 -
The moment when even Google show no realted searches, is the moment when you realise you are in some real shit !!!
#stuckupcode #noclue1 -
Stopid mf fat fingers, worked 2 weeks building a design system and 2 hours ago I accidentally shift deleted the scss folder and lost every fcking file, no git, no backup, no nada,guess what, tried to recover the files with 2 Permanently deleted file recovery softwares and from fcking 20 files, 17 were corrupted and weren’t readable, I and my designer friend use a folder sync app, the fcking app synced the delete and she lost the files aswell, fooockiinggg shieeeet, to my don’t know how where luck I managed to recover the copiled javascript chunck from my vue app that had the css styles embeded in the file, you know where I found the js file? iN ThE fcking cache of google chrome. Today I almost broke down to tears, but nonetheless it was a reeee moment for me.
15 -
True story... That moment your phone internet is more reliable than your broadband... Very annoying! 😠
4 -
Fucking first rant here:
So we tried to teach Two new colleagues to typescript and git and testing and stuff and we have a SPOC “which claimed to be very technical”. The SPOC’s task is to keep an eye on the work, and today we have had a review...
After two weeks, the created multiple branches into our git, all with one commit of 400 LOC changed, no merge requestet, issue in Redmine set to “closed”.
Well, by the way they were supposed to write Unit tests for our app.
But I thought, ok, we’ll check their branches.
Their tests all passed (cz) but man, the app didn’t and on compilation there were errors, the app is broken. Damn.
Is it really so far off, that even of They wrote tests, that the app should still work?
AND I THOUGHT IT IS COMMON SENSE. Damn!
Guess how needs to fix it6 -
When i started uni almost 2 years ago i made a bet with myself to finish the first year without drinking even one single cup of coffee.
Right now i have realized that i almost finished my second and i drank 5-6 cups in all my life.7 -
I was talking to my non-tech gf about how a colleague of mine didn't understand priority queue and show led her an example, during explanation fucked up the example and duplicated priorities of 2 values but they came up in the unexpected order. She wanted to find the logic in it and blamed the computer for being dumb, but it has been ~45 minutes, she has Wikipedia about binary trees & linked list open as well as simple graphs visualising both + armed with pen and paper trying to understand how it all all works..
Achievement Earned?
P.S I am either creating a monstrosity (Frankenstein style) or recruiting a fresh mind to our ranks, either way I am proud af 😢😊😍11 -
Sometimes, usually during the evening, I lower the lights in the living room, put some of my greatest Scotch in a glass, and stare at this fine and beautiful piece of code I wrote a long time ago that I am really proud of.7
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There comes a moment in every developer's life when he thinks about reading Design Patterns (GOF).1
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!rant
Been working on a custom html partial injector (js/jquery only) as both a personal challenge and utility to use for my website scaffold. Being a challenge, i decided not to look at any implementation from another JS framework. I won't lie, i had it 'working' at least 5 times now, but this time, after about 3-4 days, i think i got it for real. And the cool thing? It's a bit less code than my original implementation even with my generous whitespace and verbosity. And it even unwraps nicely so it looks like a regular html page in the dev tools.
I love when things finally work as they should--God knows i question my motives before then.2 -
That moment when a scheduled ALL DAY MEETING turns into a "non paid" day. Because the asshole cancelled the moment the meeting started.
Fuck this shit!2 -
that moment when you have to use the 'or' operator and don't know for that moment if you are in c#, vb, sql or php..
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This moment, you know this moment when you feel idiot, the moment when you deleted by accident the folder of your project without any saves. We all have this moment one day.4
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That moment when first I started deleting/blocking spam emails and actually began reading the important ones, was the moment I realized I'm growing up!!
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so... while this may not be *my* code, I do have to claim a fair share of the responsibility for allowing it to exist. o.o
I'm busy fixing it now though.
> note: proprietary names have been blurred, naturally.
2 -
That moment when you realize that writing “that moment when...” is because you’re too passive and insecure to just say what you really want to say...7
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When Amazon asks if my email address is all lower case... The desire to make it an informative moment that email addresses are not case sensitive is outweighed by my desire to resolve my issue as fast as possible.3
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From the moment I realised I was a TABs guy, and she a SPACEs person, it was all over. Love became terribly bad "indented" from that very moment.
4 -
When you are seeing a video tutorial and the guy remove a bunch of code that you didn't notice, and unconsciously you press 'ctrl+Z'
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During my first job as software engineer I was assign to setup meta data upon implementing the meta data I accidentally forgot to remove the static og:title="Im ocabafox and Im handsome AF" and it was deploy to production. After few days someone send an email that when they share to facebook there is a text Im ocabafox and Im handsome AF. :D
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I just had the most embarrassing moment in programming... I am writing an administration / client / invoice webapp and I was testing an export function that worked locally, because everything that was being exported was inside the folder.
So I exported the files in test production, but some invoices didn't exist. So when they don't exist, the system creates a new invoice.
Because I was running on the test production (with client data) the system emailed the created invoices to the clients.. now I have to contact some clients and tell them the invoices were sent accidentally.2 -
What was your best moment in your life as a Programmer?
Mine, besides a small amount of good projects for my course, was telling by the phone to a project partner the code, line by line, that would solve a bug in the code and when be put it and run the project it worked. Still need something to top that one XD2 -
Everyone knows how hard it is to get your first job. Everywhere wants 1-3 years of experience.
What noone tells you thought is that's hard at the other end. When you're looking for architect/tech lead roles you will see loads of postings but upon investigation they're just mislabeled senior developer positions.
And of course, if you're looking for good money, it feels almost impossible to get beyond the screening stage... -
Embarrassing moment of day.
Tell vendor their module does not work out of box.
Follow code through and it requires cc info from payment object after transaction occured. The payment method flushes cc info from payment object right after transaction so info isn't available when vendor code wants it.
Explaining to my teammates what is going on explain to fix would need to add certain transaction results to payment object.
Go on for about an hour and my teammate mentions they rewrote a file which adds necessary info but didn't get called because we rewrote it elsewhere so there is no inheritance chain.
Fuck! I feel stupid. How did I miss that rewrite? I had tunnel vision and didn't check config to see if rewrites existed. Gah!
Email vendor issue is resolved. Hide head under pillow rest of day.
Fuck how -
So a rant ago I was actually ranting because I couldn't think of how to do anything and such. Fair reminder I'm still kinda new so I decided to program small stuff to build me up so I can learn. AND I JUST MADE A PASSWORD GENERATOR ON MY FIRST TRY!!5
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At this point there's a poo poking its nose out my butthole but only a few more minutes and I can finally see the output of this program, finish, go to the loo and then go home.3
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So how many BRUH moments do you fine people have on a daily basis?
Me? I have a little over a 100 every now and then in just a few hours being at work ⚰️11 -
So I was doing random changes to get the output. Got partially correct output. Got happy. But I don't know which change is responsible. Dafuq moment!
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The moment when you wake up next morning, turn on your monitors and realize that the heavily needed update you wanted to install overnight didn't even start....1
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What made you smile last week? Were you hyped for something or proud of yourself? What made you happy?
We had some frustration/fail weeks lately, so I thought we can talk about what brought us just joy. :)
Just share some joy with me!
I'll start:
I got accepted for a Android Developer Nanodegree and I'm hyped about it! Finally I'll have some good course with materials and motivation to learn more.4 -
That moment when you've been to a colleagues desk, and just at the moment you sit down at yours, your computer goes to sleep...1
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Don't ya just love it when someone you work with is constantly asking you to do stuff. Even though you literally ask nothing of them. Can't say no though because then they throw a gigantic 11 year old temper tantrum..1
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!rant
Landed my first dev job today!!
Couldn't be more proud of myself and at the same time more terrified of what to come.2 -
3 months ago i started as a helpdesk support for a business application. This week i'm promoted as Junior Programmer worked hard for it but it paid off :)
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I was casually browsing some issues for a project on github, and I certainly across an issue where someone wanted support for for URI handling (there's a good reason for his request).
I was bored, and I just wrote a script to do exactly that. I'm gonna polish it on Sunday, and then upload it, (plus add a PR). -
brethren momentum is better than bruh moment
that is a fact
damn i really should get some sleep
fuck5 -
The awkward moment when someone tells you that they use your software but that's impossible because it's in private beta and your the only tester...
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!rant
let specialDay = moment("25/12/2017");
console.log((moment(specialDay).isSame(moment(), 'day'))?'merry christmas':null);
Merry Christmas, sorry for making it complicated xD -
Can you imagine this scary moment while resolving conflict after a pull request that might break your code ?
That's the scariest moment1 -
When you are trying to install pow for like 2 hours unsuccessfully previous day and today in like 5 mins finally made it....
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People who have seem my rants know am a calm person.. But watch out for what's coming next:
AAAAAAAAGGGGHHHH !FUCK YOU STUPID CHEAP PHONE!!
was coming home after tiring college exam, thankfully got my spirits uplifted coz of my crush's message...
So , we were chatting, i was having fun flirting with my little cuteness nd was telling her some tale about how me nd friends were partying some day....
She was so into it and was getting into her naughty mode when suddenly this asshole went off... Had got 15% notification just a second ago, thought "yeah i have some time to connect" but this shit went out from 15 to 1 in a matter of seconds!!!?!, nd that too without notifs.
Fuck man, i lost such a nice moment today X(
(Ps: am using this shit micromax phn just because my old phn is at service center) -
Spent 2 weeks of hardly coding a project to then figure out a nice data structure that fixed all my issues and difficulties. It was definitely a good day.
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