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I did a fucking scientific study about fucking rants and found a fucking high correlation between the usage of "fuck" and the number of fucking upvotes.18
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After 1,5 months of customer support as a Linux support engineer, I can honestly say:
Fuck wordpress.26 -
I'm really down.
I spent 10 years building on an application worth 800K$ revenue per year.
I tried to build a technical team. All left, because of fights with stupid account managers, CEO, business managers.
I was left alone for almost one year alone, working like 60-70 hours per week to keep the things going and adapt to more customers.
And looking for potential partners to outsource things.
Now out of the blue, 3 weeks before my summer holiday, investors introduce me to a "partner" that will rent to us a "developer" for 2 months. from tomorrow.
What the fuck I'm gonna do with him in 2 weeks I don't know.
Actually I understand that this "partner" will take over the whole project.
They used the word "to help me", but actually during the meeting they said to fix things that are not working, and to develop new features because the project is blocked.
Of course there are bugs, I have no developers with me and hundred of features and integrations to maintain. And of course everything is blocked because I have to think hard about priorities.
I feel humiliated in the worst way.
I don't know what will be my future position.
I wasted time contacting potential partners and the answer was always "there are no money".
The business strategist, entered one year ago and said "no more IT investment".
Basically as cofounder and cto (of myself), they will not fire me, if I stay silent. If I accept to be a puppet. And eat, eat eat a lot of shit. I'll grow fat from the shit I'll eat.
I feel I've lost all my hard work, and I'm alone.43 -
FUCK YOU MICROSOFT FOR THINKING THAT THE FUCKING SAD FACE IN THE BLUE SCREEN IS APPROPRIATE!!!!!!!!
THAT SHIT IS WORSE THAN CLIPPY
WHO CAME UP WITH THE IDEA TO MAKE THE ERROR CODE IN SO SMALL PRINT???
YOU OWE ME 5 DAYS OF MY LIFE AND COUNTING!
NOT ONLY HAVE I BEEN UNABLE TO DO MY JOB, I HAVE ALSO NOT BEEN ABLE TO VENT MY FRUSTRATION KILLING ALIENS, IF I HAVE TO SPENT ANOTHER DAY FIXING THIS STUPID COMPUTER I WILL SWIM ALL THEY WAY OVER TO AMERICA AND BITCH SLAP EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR DEVELOPERS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!28 -
We are a hosting company.
That means that we host websites and servers.
Hat does NOT mean that we manage your FUCKING APPLICATIONS.
THE NEXT FUCKING PERSON WHO'S GOING TO ASK ME APPLICATION RELATED QUESTIONS OR TRIES TO CONVINCE ME THAT IT REALLY IS A MOTHERFUCKING HOSTING ISSUE IS GOING TO GET A FUCKING FIST IN THEIR EYES.
FUCKING FUCKING FUCK.18 -
First on the phone this afternoon and also a crapload of tickets.
*alright let's do some tickets*
*tringgggggg*
*fair enough, phone comes first*
*half an hour later call finishes*
*alright, tickets!*
*tringggg*
*alright phone first again*
*handles call, hangs up*
*Aaand tickets!*
*Tringgggggggg*
*oh come on I need to do tickets :/*
*handles call again and closes convo*
*Aaaand now: ticke... *TRINGGGG*
*oh come on!!*
*handles call once again*
*please don't interrupt me now, I need to do those ti.... *TRINGGGG MOTHERFUCKER*
*fucking hell!*
*handles call and tries to stay calm*
*now tickets!*
*types reply, presses repl... *TRINGGGG 😈*
*OH FOR FUCKS SAKE*
*handles call once a-FUCKING-gain*
*if the phone rings now...*
*goes to the reply button again and: clic.... *TRINGGGGGG - GO FUCK YOURSELF!*
FUUUUUUUCKING FUCKING FUCK.
FUCK. TODAY WAS ANNOYING AS HELL.10 -
I just spent 20m debugging.
Basically bootstrap nav wasn't working. Couldn't understand why not.
Figured out its a an issue with the JS interfering so I remove the script reference from my HTML. Problem solved.
Okay,cool. Now let's add that file back in and figure out what caused the issue.
Hm. This line looks like it might be it *comments it out*...odd. Problem still happens.
*proceed to comment out and test every function to see what could be causing this issue*. Still happens. Fuck it. *comments the entire file out*
what the fucking fuck. I remove the script reference the problem is gone. I remove all code from the script - problem persists.
...wait...are you fucking kidding me. I OPENED THE WRONG JS FILE WITH THE SAME NAME BUT IN A DIFFERNT DIRECTORY.7 -
Fuck frontend. Writing a new service thingy and while the backend was done in about one fucking hour, I've been working on the frontend for hours now because frontend fucking hates me and that feeling is fucking mutual.
Grrrrrrr. (and respect for the ones who can properly develop nice looking interfaces)13 -
If you come to me, and ask for my opinion about something, then you throw “You’re wrong” at my face. Then why the fuck did you ask me in the first place? Fucking cunt21
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Just had to use Google maps for the first time in ages because nothing else was working.
It displayed a bus stop at a wrong location. I just fucking missed my bus.
Thanks for nothing, Google, go fuck yourself.14 -
I AM MISSING A FUCKING DIV TAG OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT AND I CANNOT FIND IT. MOTHERFUCKER FUCKING FUCK.19
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Monday Status Report:
Production: Fucked,
Dev: Super Fucked,
Deliverables due today: Extra Fucked,
Phone: Ultra Fucked (rant brought to you today by Chrome ext),
Car 1: Mega Fucked,
Car 2: Slightly Fucked,
Jeep: Completely Fucked,
House: Copiously Fucked,
Today: FUCK7 -
Fuck Windows server. Fucking fuck it. How fucking difficult can it be to create a fucking backup. Motherfucking fuckity fuck fucking fuck fuck fuck.7
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Fucking fuck, I have been coding for so long yet I still make this mistake:
I wrote:
if (stateRunning = 1)
instead of:
if (stateRunning == 1)22 -
Umidigi, kindly go fuck yourself.
When --> I <-- buy a phone, I should be the fucking one who decides if I'm allowed to install a motherfucking custom launcher.
Your phone is awesome (second full day with heavy usage == 53 percent battery) but on the launcher thing, go fuck yourself. Also go to hell. No, go fuck yourself IN hell, that's even better.29 -
https://fuckoff.services.
Wrote it because fuck it why not. Was sick at home and wanted to build something :)
Feedback would be great!
About the short character limit, I might up it a little but this thing is about writing short messages and not stories so that's a choice on purpose.45 -
Don't develop depression, develop a personality instead, be more outgoing and outspoken, work out, dress better and make your life shit that goes beyond coding.
Tired of people in tech being this way. Everyone acts as if monkeying away on the keyboard makes them some sort of autistic genius that is too good for everyone else.
Some of you have the social skillset of a fucking potato.
You code dude. Most of you develop websites...chill the fuck out.52 -
I have never been fucked more in my life. A month ago I finished a 3 month internship for my last year of my education. And next to the internship I only have my thesis to defend and voila, I got my diploma! The internship itself went awesome, met some very interesting people, had a ton of fun working there and they were really happy about me.
But then it started, about 2 weeks after my internship started I got an email that my mentor (from school itself) had changed. It changed to a guy who's known for his insane way of teaching and being very unprofessional. Sometimes when I had a class on another level a bit further in the hall, we could hear him screaming while he was "teaching". He's really insane and should in no way be teaching to students. On top of that he has very little knowledge about CS, since he "teaches" maths.
So after I got the news I knew I was fucked. This guy is really hard to communicate with. And I'd never be able to have a decent, professional conversation with him.
So after I did everything I knew I was supposed to do, I tried to contact him on what else he'd need from me. His emails were crazy, unprofessional, and in no condition of being able to read and understand. So I started to get really annoyed but I didn't make this clear towards him. I even complained to another person of my school in a very polite way by saying that our communication wasn't going so well, I got no answer from that person and she even forwarded my complaint to him without asking for my permission and answering me.
So I kept doing what he kinda asked for, but had no idea if I was doing it wrong or right since I almost never got an answer from him, or the answer was not even an answer to my questions in the first place.
Today I had my presentation of the internship in front of him. It's the first time I see him since this school year. I give my presentation being quite happy of what I did at the company. When I was finished he starts bashing me into oblivion with ignorant questions, comments and very deconstructive negative feedback. Me not knowing what the fuck is happening and getting really angry inside standing there with nothing to say. I answered all of his questions as good as I could. But he was tearing me down so fucking hard. Because I only had half an hour I sticked with the most important stuff about my internship, didn't go to deep into all of it because he's not a fucking it'er anyway, and he asked for it specifically not to go deep into the project. But now he's saying I'm not giving enough information?! (He wanted to know what IDE I used?!?! What the fuck has that to do with anything)
So although I had a wonderful internship and I completed my project far better than the company had expected, my presentation went awful. I'm thinking that the guy was predetermined in failing me. How can I do a good job if he himself is not give a fuck about me. So now he's probably failing me for something he has no clue of what I did, and it's not even my fault.
I have no idea what I should be doing now. I start working in the second week of February but I probably won't get my bachelors degree until September now because of this fucker. I'm even thinking on taking legal actions. This guy just fucked my self confidence so hard. I'm fucking depressed right now15 -
WHY THE FUCK IS MORE AND MORE APPS BUILT WITH ELECTRON. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
FUCK.28 -
Installed my pihole a few days ago and not a very high percentage blocked.
Added google/facebook/twitter and some more to the wildcard (regex) blacklist and BAM, so many blocked queries!
Fuck Google, Facebook, twitter and other mass surveillance companies.26 -
"hi, we have some dns records we'd like to change, they're in the attachment. Could you send a message when it's done? Thanks in advance!"
No, fuck off. Fucking cunts.15 -
Fuck YOU Xcode!
20 crashes since I started working this morning.
Restarted the iMac, same shit.
Cleared NVRAM/PRAM whatever its called, same shit.
Closed EVERYTHING, restarted iMac again, unplugged from the wall, left it few mins, replugged back, turned it on, continued working, AND IT STILL KEEPS FUCKING ME OUT OF NOWHERE.
FUCK THIS, FUCK XCODE, FUCK APPLE, AND FUCK WHOEVER DARES TO THINK THAT ITS A GREAT PIECE OF SOFTWARE, im done.
P.S. this rage got me to a point where i had to make this paper
13 -
"doEs AnYOnE HAVE IssUeS wiTh gETTing gIrl beCoz CodIng"
lmao what a fucking dweeb. What a loser really. How about we don't make a fucking job something akin to a personality trait?
were I single, would I sell myself as a "cODER" to a girl? fuck no, do some of you nerds really introduce yourself in such way? is this bs ass job your end all be all? aye, this be the easiest way to poise yourself in the complete opposite direction of the female sexual organ.
Fucking quit that shit, ain't no one really gasping for air because you can lay down some fucking js in a website, who gives a fuck? like really? these posts are so fucking annoying.
Grow a pair, and some personality.
Background: some dweeb complaining to me about finding it hard to get girls because of his "passion" station women would lose interest because all he would talk about is dev shit113 -
TLDR: Fuck you, Client A
1. Want to change the business flow during UAT and decide the deadline to be less than 4 weeks, even though that's how the business flow stated on the docs
2. He threatening us not to pay if it isn't done, even though he's not the one paying us
3. He said time isn't a problem because he can provide a table and chair that is put in front of his table
Fuck you, Client A13 -
Tried to modify a script again which pretty much installs a ready to use vpn server on a server.
Tried to modify it so that it takes arguments instead of manual input.
It is, fucking, yet again, quitting right after an apt install command.
Error exit code? Oh no, a perfectly fine fucking 0. Which means it ran successfully.
Successfully my fucking ass. You aren't even through half the motherfucking script!?
Fucking hell. Fuck my life sideways.27 -
Fuck code.org. Fuck code. Not code code, but "code" (the word "code"). I hate it. At least for teaching. Devs can use it as much as they want, they know what it means and know you can't hack facebook with 10 seconds of furiously typing "code" into a terminal. What the fuck are you thinking when you want me to hack facebook? No, when I program, it's not opening terminal, changing to green text and typing "hack <insert website name here, if none is given, this will result to facebook.com>" Can you just shut the fuck up about how you think that because you can change the font in google fucking docs you have the right to tell me what code can and can't do? No, fuck you. Now to my main point, fuck "code" (the string). It's an overused word, and it's nothing but a buzzword (to non devs, you guys know what you're talking about. how many times have you seen someone think they are a genius when they here the word "code"?) People who don't know shit don't call themselves programmers or devs, they call themselves coders. Why? It fucking sounds cool, and I won't deny that, but the way it's talked about in movies, by people, (fucking) code.org, etc, just makes people too much of a bitch for me to handle. I want everyone reading this rant who has friends who respect the fact that YOU know code (I truly believe everyone on devRant does), how it works, and it's/your limitations, AND that it takes hard work and effort, to thank god right now. If you're stuck with some people like me, I feel you. Never say "code" near them again. Say "program." I really hate people who think they know what an HTML tag is and go around calling themselves coders. Now onto my main point, code.org. FUCK IT. CAN YOU STOP RUINING MY FUCKING AP CS CLASS. NO CODE.ORG, I DON'T NEED TO WATCH YOUR TEN GODDAMN VIDEOS ON HOW TECHNOLOGY IS IMPORTANT, <sarcasm>I'VE BEEN LIVING UNDER A ROCK FOR THIRTY YEARS</sarcasm>. DO I REALLY NEED ANOTHER COPY OF SCRATCH? WAIT, NO, SCRATCH WAS BETTER. YOU HAD FUCKING MICROSOFT, GOOGLE, AND OTHER TECHNOLOGICAL GIANTS AND YOU FUCKED UP SO BAD YOU MADE IT WORSE THAT SCRATCH. JUST LETMECODE (yes I said that) AND STOP TALKING ABOUT HOW SOME IRRELEVANT ROBOT ARM DEVELOPED BY MIT IS USING AI AND MACHINE LEARNING TO MAKE SOME ROBOT EVOLVE?! IF YOU SPEND ONE MORE SECOND SAYING "INNOVATION" I'LL SHOVE THAT PRINT STATEMENT YOU HAVE A SYNTAX ERROR UP YOUR ASS. DON'T GET ME FUCKING STARTED ON HOW ITS IMPOSSIBLE TO DO ANYTHING FOR YOURSELF WHEN YOUR GETTING ALL THE ANSWERS WITHOUT DOING ANY WORK AND THE FACT THAT JAVASCRIPT IS YOUR FUCKING LANGUAGE. <sarcasm>GREAT IDEA, LETS GET THESE NEW PROGRAMMERS INTO A PROFESSIONAL ENVOIRMENT BY ADDING A DRAG AND DROP CODE (obviously we can say it) EDITOR</sarcasm> MAYBE IF YOU GOT THIS SHIT UP YOUR ASS AND TO YOUR BRAIN YOU'D ACTUALLY GET TO PRPGRAMMING IN YOUR ADVANCED AP COURSE. ITS CALLED FUCKING CODE.ORG FOR A REASON32
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After a little I'm having huge issues with my new phone. No custom ROMs available.
Fuck this shit I'm going to try to port another Mediatek based ROM to my phone tonight.
I'd rather get a bricked device than working with this piece of shit vendor made android system.
The phone itself other the the software is very good though!
Umidigi programmers, go fuck yourselves.19 -
For those of you retards that post shit like:
"fuck"
"well I hate this"
or similar shit that only you understand in the hopes that someone goes and asks you what is wrong: fuck off with that attention seeking bullshit.
Seriously, even it your shit is tech dev related, just fucking post it you attention seeking shitstain.
Or fuck off all together from the app to begin with.17 -
school takes the creativity out of programming.
you want to try something new?
sorry, can't have that. functionality = priority.
school takes the choice out of programming.
- you're gonna use x language
- with x api
- in x environment
- and make it in x way
- because if you don't, your gonna fail x assignments
- because programming is about getting the job done, with no creativity
yeah fuck you too
school takes the cleverness out of programming
you get a turn left function. it turns a 'turtle' left any amount of degrees that you pass it, you have to make a turn right function to turn right 90 degrees. well, if you thought turning left -90 degrees was a good idea to make a turn right function, then fuck you. you have to turn left three timeswith the default 90 degrees instead because it's more practical/logical.
fuck that.
anyone else hate the movements to get programming into schools?14 -
After pissing me off for month or so with it's stupid bsods I've decided it's time to move on. Fuck windows.
9 -
You dumb, stupid fucking idiot.
Yes, that's me. Spent an hour debugging something, only to find out I wasn't paying attention when going through the API ref. Fucking fuck. Such a waste of time.2 -
I'm so sick of all these fat frontend websites.
Transferring dozens of megabytes of mostly unused libraries is not acceptable.
A browser tab crunching up CPU time because everything must be "beautifully animated" (🤢) and processed without involving page reloads/backend is not acceptable.
A response time of over a second is not acceptable.
Cryptic error messages and random popups asking you to reload your page, not acceptable.
Sticky elements/popups breaking access on small screens is not acceptable.
Running hundreds of ajax calls per minute as heartbeats/probes
and crashing the page when the internet has a hiccup, not acceptable.
Fuck Asana, Fuck Twitch, Fuck LinkedIn, Fuck Youtube, Fuck the dozens of other SPAs which unload their truckload of diarrhea into a tab, yet fail to load crucial functionality about half of the time.
Fuck any page that breaks when you block Facebook, Doubleclick, Twitter or Google Analytics. To hell with websites depending on cookies or javascript loaders to display anything.
I want webpages to be interactive informational documents again.
Fuck off with your apps.
If you want to make an app, learn to use a real language, and get the fuck out of my browser.4 -
Guys, I think it's time to fight back!
Whenever a client ask you about IE9 support, tell him to find someone else, because noone the fuck uses IE9 and if someone somehow does, then it's his fault!
Then he will search for other dev, but if we all do so, we can forget about supporting stupid old shit again!2 -
Nobody proof reads anymore. It pisses me off. News sources with obvious spelling and grammatical mistakes. It seems that it is acceptable on the internet to not give a fuck.6
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Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK fuck fck fk fuck16
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Just a common day.
I received a message on Telegram, a guy wanted a Minecraft plugin for his server.
It was a small plugin, he accepted my first offer of 15€.
After some hours, it was complete. I was pressing "Export" on my IntelliJ but a terrifying message arrived.
"Dude I forgot to say that, can you make it using C++? I heard EXEs are faster".
Fuck dumb clients especially Minecraft server owners!7 -
Ever had one of those moments when sites run by cunts (fuck you CNET) autoplays videos at 200% volume?
Use the extension called "Silent Site Sound Blocker" to make sure only whitelisted websites can play sounds.
Fuck yeah!7 -
FUCK YOU WORDPRESS
Omfg never been so fucking pissed in my life.
I just wasted 3 hours because this fucking bullshit rewrites the fucking URL based on the URL on a config fucking file?!!?
It fucking ignores: apache virtual host configs and nginx reverse proxy
omfg...8 -
Congratulations on a great year of continuous stress and being successful. As a reward here's a 50 bucks increase to your salary.
Yeah... great.. fuck you!1 -
Let me just delete this symbolic link and leave it copying the folder to the ssd real quick while I go to lunch...
Lessons learned:
1 - don't put a fucking / at the end of `rm -rf /path/to/link`
2 - don't ignore the warning of it being a folder after trying to `rm /path/to/link`
3 - backup your fucking dev database too
4 - don't do stuff hungry
SHIT!! FUCK!!3 -
Firefox: click on the address bar and now you can select something or start typing or move the cursor left/right, works great.
Chromium (because fuck chrome):click in the address bar and THE ENTIRE URL GETS/BECOMES SELECTED. Wanna type something? Sure, go ahead, but FIRST click somewhere else or move the cursor because otherwise the entire url is fucking gone.
Maybe there's a way to disable this behavior but boy does it annoy the living fuck out of me!15 -
FUCKING FUCK! THE TEAM LEAD WANTS ME TO MAKE AN UNNECESSARY UPDATE, AND IN THAT TOO HE WANTS TO IMPLEMENT A HALF ASSED FEATURE. Upon telling him what it takes(which he doesn't understand shit about cuz he's not from webdev background and has the level of experience that I had when I was midway my first webdev book), not to mention that he hasn't even seen the code of the project I've worked upon, which I got from an intern they fired last year cuz of not working and shitting around everywhere in the code(I asked if we could start afresh and he says that it'll take too much time - guess what, it took us two extra weeks already cuz of that and half of our required features can't be implemented cuz the code is beyond any hope), he tells me that "The client won't need this feature, but we're thinking of more and more features to provide (WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK).
Okay, you wanna sell your product; fine. I suggested that if we're letting the client select the time stamp on the initial date, then we should let him select the time stamp on the ending date too, right?
"No, we'll not provide this feature" ARE YOU FUCKING BONKERS?! WHAT THE FUCK IS THE FUCKING PROBLEM WITH YOU?!?!
I'll have to make major breaking changes in the code, for which I'm not the only one working on. Great.
This, coupled with the fact that he speaks unbelievably slow and it's so irritating cuz he repeats himself thrice.
What happens(has already happened), when he'll show this to the seniors, he'll say that this is either unnecessary/will suggest a major change, which WOULD HAVE BEEN MUCH FUCKING BETTER IF TOLD BEFORE I START WITH THE CHANGE, YOU FUCKING CUNTS
I thought this would be fun. Well fuck me.2 -
i am BEYOND pissed at google.
as some of you know, i recently got android studio to run on a chromebook (you read that right), but it being a chromebook and google being a protective fucktard of their crappy operating system, i had to boot into bios every time i started it.
when i was with some friends, i started up the chromebook, and left, after telling my friends how to boot the chromebook.
ten seconds and literally one press of the esc button later, he broke the entire thing.
but that's not what that rant was about, i honestly knew it would happen eventually (although, this wasn't the best time).
so now this screen pops up.
"chrome os is damaged or missing, please insert a usb recovery drive" or something like that.
well, i'll create one. simple enough.
no wait, this is google, just your average 750 billion dollar company who cares more about responsive design then a product actually responding.
i started to create the recovery usb. of course, chrome developers thought it would be a good idea to convert the old, working fine, windows executable usb recoverer, and replace with with a fucking chrome extension.
i truly hope someone got fired.
so, after doing everything fine with the instructions, it got to the part where it wrote the os image to the usb. the writing stayed at 0%.
now this was a disk thing, writing os's and shit, so i didn't want to fuck it up. after waiting ten minutes, i pressed 'cancel.'
i tried again many times, looked things up, and frantically googled the error. i even tried the same search queries on bing, yahoo, duckduckgo and ecosia because i had the feeling google secretly had tracked me over the past 7 years and decided to not help me after all the times i said google was a fucker or something similar.
google is a fucker.
after that, i decided to fuck with it, even if it formats my fucking c drive.
i got to the same point where the writing got stuck at 0% and proceeded to fuck. i start spamming random keys, and guess what?
after i press enter, it started.
what the fuck google?
1000s of people read the article on how to make the recovery drive. why not tell them to press the goddamn enter key?
i swear there are hundreds of other people in my same situation. and all they have to do is press one fucking key???
maybe tell those people who tried to fix the shit product you sold them.
fuck you google.9 -
Another fucking twat asking for a responsive html email when they are targeting outlook. IT USES THAT HEAP IF SHIT WORD AS A RENDERING ENGINE WHAT THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THAT! It's bad enough having to code them up using fucking tables and spacer gifs. Why do IT people stick religiously to Microsoft heap of shit applications... Oh I know it's because they are so fucking shit that it needs a full time twat just to get them through the fucking day. Fuck Microsoft. I guess you can sense I'm having a bad day, especially when my broadband decides to pack in, on and off all fucking day and the support twat puts me on hold then fucks off. FML14
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I am on the fucking verge of throwing my coffee cup at a coworker.
I am sitting in an office with someone who has to vocalise everything that he thinks.
It started this morning, I was trying to solder the board on my headphones, because there was a cable that had come loose, and every fucking time that I start, some shithead phones, and then a few minutes later, he comes in and talks shit. Burnt myself.
Now I am trying to maintain some code, and every fucking time I start typing and getting into my code, the need to talk has to fucking arise. I have literally thrown the last 45 minutes out of the window because I cannot fucking concentrate. Nothing helps. Throwing a coffee cup will probably just inspire more to talk about.
Phenomenal, another motherfucker just came into my office and decided that it is decent to use the phone to phone his buddies.
Fuck this shit.10 -
WTF python.... How the fuck are you an OOP language and unable to overload constructors...?
No method overloading... and they say JAVA is a shitty language.24 -
FUCK PRINTERS
WERE ALL PRINTERS DESIGNED BY INCOMPETENT MONKEYS WHO HAVEN'T EVER TOUCHED AN ACTUAL PIECE OF PAPER IN THEIR LIVES?!
WERE THEY PAID SPECIFICALLY TO MAKE SURE THEY WOULD NEVER WORK WHEN YOU NEED THEM TO?!?
IT REALLY SHOULDN'T BE SUCH A FUCKING PAIN TO DO A GODDAMN SIMPLE THING LIKE PRINT A BLACK AND WHITE JPEG!
I'M NOT ASKING FOR MUCH, JUST A FUCKING EVEN HALFWAY FUNCTIONAL MACHINE THAT DOES AS ADVERTISED AND DOESN'T REQUIRE SACRIFICING A GOAT TO CONNECT TO
FUCK ALL PRINTERS EVERYWHERE30 -
So this Fujitsu monitor has a Vesa 100x100 mount but the monitor stand isn't removable. Bruh, why even bother putting a Vesa mount on the monitor if you can't take the original damn stand off. Fuck you Fujitsu, fuck you.
6 -
Looks like I'm destined to be fucked in the ass every time I'm on vacation...
This boss : https://devrant.com/rants/1330624/...
Told me he is gonna implement the new backend of a web app we have while I'm on vacation...
He was trying stuff with python for it and I tried to explain him the benefits of polymorphism and the ideas behind it and he was looking clueless, as always...
I'm screwed... Last time I went on vacation they started using react ( no complains ) and firebase ( fuck this shit ) ...
Now we are moving this web app away from firebase but I can see it is gonna be shit and a lot of rants will follow from his "back end" that this motherfucker here is gonna have to help implement after 2 weeks of fucked up code...5 -
Google Insights updates their image score algorithm. Now all our website scores dropped from ~90 to 20 - 50. Guess who needs to resize all the freaking images. Fuck me.
3 -
> be me
> be fooled into a company that says they do agile, tests and best practiced
> theyreallydont.jpg
> read issue "The last name is not showing on X and Y screen".
> www.fixed.it
> they ask why isnt it also fixed on screen A, B, C, D, E, F, G.
> ...
fuck you9 -
(Best read while listening to AEnima by Tool, loudly)
Dear Current Workplace,
Fuck you, for the reasons enumerated below.
Fuck your enterprise grey blue offices, the stifling warm air of a hundreds of bodies and sub par "development laptops".
Fuck your shitty carbonated water machines which were a cost saving measure over decent drinkable water.
Fuck your fake "flexi time", "you can do home office whenever you want" bullshit. You're still inviting me to mandatory meetings at 09:00 regularly.
Fuck your shitty, in house, third part IT provider sister company. They're the worst of all worlds. If it was in company, we'd get to give out to them, if it was an external company we'd fire them. And yes, when I quit I will quote the dumpster fire that is our corporate VPN as a major factor.
Fuck your cheery, bland, enterprise communication. Words coming under the corporate letterhead seem to lose all association with meaning. Agile, communication, open are things you write and profess to respect, but it seems your totally lack understanding of their meaning.
Fuck your client driven development. Sometime you actually have to fix the foundations before you can actually add new features. And fuck you management who keep on asking "why are there so many bugs and why is it always taking longer to deliver new releases". Because of you, you fucknuts, Because you can't say "NO" to the customer. Because you never listen to your own experienced developers.
Fuck your bullshit "code quality is important to us" line. If it's so important, then let us fix the heap of shit you're selling so that it works like a quasi functional program.
Fuck you development environment which has 250 projects in a single VS solution. Which takes 5mins plus to compile on a quad core i7 with 32 gb of ram.
Fuck this bullshit ball of mud "architecture". I spend most of my time trying to figure out where the logic should go and the rest of the time writing converters between different components. All because 7 years ago some idiot "architect" made a decision that they didn't have to live with.
Actually, fuck that guy in particular. Yeah, that guy who was the responsible architect for the project for 4 years and not once opened the solution to look a the code.
Fuck the manual testing of every business process. Manual setup of the entities takes 10mins plus and then when you run, boom either no message or some bullshit error code.
Fuck the antiquated technology choices which cause loads of bugs and slow down development. Fuck you for forcing me to do manual tests of another developers code at 20:00 on a Friday night because we can't get our act together to do this automatically.
Fuck you for making sure it's very clear I'm never going to be anything but a code monkey in this structure. Managers are brought in from outside.
Fuck you for being surprised that it's hard to hire competent developers in this second rate, overpriced town. It's hard to hire anywhere but this bland shithole would have anyone with half a clue running away at top speed.
Fuck you for valuing long hours and loyalty over actual performance. That one guy who everyone hated and was totally incompetent couldn't even get himself fired. He had to quit.
Fuck you for your mediocrity.
Fuck you for being the only employer for my skill-set in the region; paying just well enough that changing jobs locally doesn't make sense, but badly enough that it's difficult to move.
Fuck you for being the stable "safe" option so that any move is "risky".
Fuck your mediocrity.
Fuck you for being something I think about when I'm not at work. Not only is it shit from 9 to 5 you manage to suck the joy out of everything else in my life as well?
Fuck you for making me feel like a worse developer every day I work here. Fuck you for making every day feel like a personal and professional failure. Fuck you for making me seriously leave a career I love for something, anything else.
Fuck you for making the most I can hope for when I get up in the morning is to just make it until the night.6 -
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
So, any good ways to run games on debian?
43 -
Fuck! I gotta bring snacks to work i guess. I get hungry by 2 hrs into work and stomach starts to make those weird sounds.
My coworker must be thinking I'm farting... :/
Technically it's farting but its just inside stomach fart.... Hope she wont misunderstand.1 -
About to send my entire department on Vacation Leave today for the next week. We have 3 days of work before we go on holiday leave (next week). And I want to give them a 3 day head start because fuck everyone else and I want me boys to enjoy shit beforehand.
Fuck you, managers do care.4 -
Developing something which, for real world testing, would require a smartphone with a gps chip/capability or however the fuck you call that.
I do have that but it's so goddamn hard to get a lock on my location which makes it very hard to test this IRL.
😥7 -
I think I'm having my first burn out... I literally can't do shit for the past week or more. Fuck...15
-
My current company decided to do all automation in node.js.
Crawling, new projects, processes, all of it in Node.
Fuck my life.19 -
Today I woke up on a beautiful day, feeling well rested. Then I remember PHP is a thing and it all went to shit. FUCK YOU, FUCK SHIT FUCK4
-
Stop sending passwords in plain text via email. Just stop already. If you don't know how to implement a secure alternative, hire a fucking consultancy to assist you.
Fuck. The next time I purchase from you and I get my password in plain text anywhere, I'm immediately demanding a refund and taking my money elsewhere.
Just fucking stop.13 -
NO FUCKING WAY YOU ARE GONNA PAY SOMEONE THE EQUIVALENT OF TWO MONTHS WHAT I MAKE TO DO SOMETHING I CAN DO IN A FUCKING WEEKEND BECAUSE "I HAVE SO MUCH TO DO ALREADY AND COMPANY STUPID POLICY DOESN'T ALLOW EMPLOYEES TO BE CONTRACTED AS FREELANCER ON THEIR SPARE TIME!!
HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT TO MY FACE YOU STUPID COCK SUCKER! I BET YOU CANT EVEN SUCK A FUCKING DICK PROPERLY STUPID FUCK!!!!!!!4 -
To whoever in the history of this godforsaken app I’m tasked with has commingled PHP with ColdFusion, I have a message for you:
Fuck you...fuck your momma, fuck yo daddy, fuck yo computer, fuck yo keyboard, fuck yo mouse, fuck the clothes on your back, fuck monitors that displayed this shit, fuck your fingers in particular, fuck yo brain, fuck whoever dropped yo on your head as an infant, fuck the car you drove to work in, fuck the servers running this shit, fuck anybody who was involved with your education, and if I see you on the street ima slap the shit out of you.7 -
Who holds the #1 Google spot for these queries?
fuck c#: devRant
fuck typescript: devRant
fuck xcode: devRant
fuck product owner: devRant
fuck docker: reddit (devRant is 2)
fuck java: reddit (devRant is 2)
fuck agile: reddit (devRant is 2)
fuck scrum: reddit (devRant is 2)
fuck sql: reddit (devRant is 2)
fuck node: reddit (devRant is 3)
fuck php: github (devRant is 4)
fuck python: github (devRant is 4)
fuck clojure: reddit (devRan't didn't rank on first page)
fuck rust: reddit (devRant didn't rank on first page)
fuck scala: reddit (devRant didn't rank on first page)
fuck ruby: **am I still connected to the company VPN? I might have some explaining to do** (devRant didn't rank)13 -
This run up to Christmas is the shit. Everything is suddenly urgent. No time to do a proper job. If that isn't bad enough, you are also tasked with thinking up some ideas for family Christmas presents, as if i give a flying fuck. I dont mind the break for the holidays but i fucking hate Christmas but have to put a brave face on and celebrate (what exactly am i celebrating). And no scrooge comments please.8
-
!rant
Whenever I open someone elses code, I do a project wide search for "FUCK".
Found many of these:
die("FUCK")
// fuck this
// #todo FUCK
Works on github as well. 😂🤣1 -
fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUUUCCCKKK FUCKING FUUUCKKKBKB
if you gave me a feature that has 2^5 posible output, but didn't give me all the possible inputs AND expect me to finish it for this thursday, THEN DONT GIVE ME EXTRA JOB ON A DRIVER THAT DOESNT WORK. FUCK2 -
Me: Installs WLAN card into PC,
Windows: LOL FUCK YOU IM DEACTIVATED!
Me: Removes WLAN Card.
Windows: YOU MAD BRO?!
Yes... Yes i am7 -
Fuck this shit, fuck it, take it down, smash it with a rock and fuck it. Fucking 18th century system where we are graded for a 2 hour work after 6 months of learning. Fuck the idiots who think reading from a piece of paper will teach us something. Fuck the sheep who follow without looking aside. Fuck the asshole who initiated it all, and fuck this shit. Thank you.9
-
Fuck edge and fuck ie
Its particularly funny when something works on IE...but not on edge. Go fucking figure.
Bing is ok ms...y'all should focus on that. Ie was semiok back in the day but your browser game is weak af b.
Like seriously
"Edge and ie are awesome"
Said no web developer ever7 -
typos are ok if you can still understand what one is trying to say.
if your typos interfere with understanding, THEN FUCKING CORRECT THEM.
I'M TIRED OF NOT BEING ABLE TELL IF YO MEANT "…" OR "." WHEN YOU TYPE ".."
DID YOU FUCKING PRESS IT TWICE BY ACCIDENT OR DID YOU MEAN TO TYPE THREE PERIODS?
FUCK YOUUUUUU4 -
[9:10]
CTO (works as a team lead): You here?
Me: Yes 👍
CTO: After doing X, Y and Z I broke X. That should not happen. You do understand, that this is not a good UX?
Me (asked CTO X amount of times to hire a a good designer, because I’m not): Well, we made the backend receive Y when X is triggered so B can be passed. I can tell the user to do Y in order to do Z.
CTO: NO, you will not. Do what I’ve said.
DUDE WTF? YOU FUCKING 🐎 I WILL BLOW YOU BRAINS WITH MY MORNING NAUSEA AND DIARRHOEA. FUCKING DIPSHIT ALLOWS HIS BAD MOOD AFFECT OTHER EMPLOYEES. HOW THE FUCK YOURE A CTO.
IM NOT GOING TO REWRITE THE CENTER PIECE OF OUR APPLICATION IN A DAY, WHICH TOOK US MONTHS TO MAKE. FUCK OFF
Monday, hurray 🥳 -
(Disclaimer: This rant is satire and only here to feed an algorithm by @PrivateGER)
This FUCKING fuck company where I had my fucking shit internship - just fucking asked me to freaking work for another project and fucking baiting me with a shitty damn payment for my little shit project I had (and still fucking work on today) while I had this damn internship. This idiot wants me to fucking waste my free time besides FUCKING SCHOOL (doing my absolute nonsense uselessfuck Abitur) and my lovely PASSIONATE GAME PROJECT with shit damn HTML-ing and CSS-ing and good damn JS-ing - for a SHITHEAD-200€ JOB. This bastard wants me to register my ass as a "Kleingewerbe" (dunno english therm but it's a small similar for to being freelancer) probably to enslave me or USE me as a cheapass worker. I'll call this dude today and politely tell him to FUCK OFF!!
(Nothing against the company, they're freaking cool! The dude too)4 -
Never mind to my last rant. I FUCKING ACCIDENTALLY FUCKING NAMED A MYSQL FUCKING GOD FUCKING DAMN FIELD FUCKING DESC FUCK FUCK FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKKKKKKKK FUCK fuck FUCK
5 -
I recently got a notification that said "the are 590 new rants since your last visit" or something like that.
At the time that I got that notification the last time I logged on was only a day or two ago. And I'm not even subbed to that many people!
You all need to chill the fuck out. It shouldn't be healthy for you all to be this angry all the damn time.2 -
school is TERRIBLY designed.
why the FUCK are our grades dependent on EFFORT and NOT KNOWLEDGE.
im sick and tired of kids who scribble on homework and fail tests but still get a's, while i ace tests but dont do any homework.
how long ago was it that school was about LEARNING. to gain knowledge. kids who dont SHOULD NOT GET GOOD GRADES.
fuck you🖕16 -
this === 'rant'
> True
A million dollars for the head that creates a lethal virus that forcefully uninstalls IE and installs Firefox/Chrome and unleashes it upon planet Earth. Sorry if this sounds too harsh but guess what? FUCK IE.13 -
Getting a tour today at my new job (non-dev related, just pays the bills). it's quite a travel AND RIGHT ON THIS FUCKING DAY THE PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION PLANNER IS GIVING 500 ERRORS. FUCKING FUCK FML.2
-
Fuck fucking fuckerty fuck I forgot to backup my projects code appearantly and now at least a week is lost F.U.C.K.6
-
!dev
Whoever the fuck wit coded the entire system for the university/college application information portal over here in my country needs to be hung, shot, hung again and shot.
It's **ABSOLUTE FUCKING GARBAGE** on the design. First we have the search box. It literally takes a good 20 seconds to query 1000 entries at low traffic and 3 MINUTES at high traffic. Bad enough? Because it would also take that long to give you a table of search result which is, I shit you not, identical to the drop-down results you get while typing except rendered inside a <table></table> with some overlay!
Oh, did I mention it didn't have partial match? Yea, IT DIDN'T. For example, "John Hurr Doe City" would not match "John Hurr Doe city" just to piss you off. And then we have the fuckers that do this:
- University A John Hurr Doe city
- University B JHD City
- University C JHD city
That and no partial match. Yea. It's BS.
Also. if you wanna search again after view a school, you have to press "Back", the physical "Back" of the browser. Fair, it's good, but if you press anything other than that button, welll, you're fucked although lightly.
The cherry on top of the rant cone? The whole thing is made by the studentfucking Ministry of Education and Training, the mother of overlord of students. Yea. The fucking Ministry itself. Really. You wanna go "catch up with the world and master the 4.0 Industrial Revolution" and yet you can't fucking code the site properly. Fuck you, fuck you, fuck your horse you're riding and probably fuck you as well.
Sorry for getting slightly political at the end, the damn page is getting on my nerve. -
Ohh man i fucked up bad. 5 days as intern, and i fuck up really bad with my ego and ignorance.
I love my this company. A great environment, lots of people to learn from , i am given reasonable tasks and i feel happy to complete them. But what happened today was weird and fucked up.
I have never worked at a place with seniors designers tech leads and more people with positions. I have also worked with a lot of competitive people who are always in a race to be first.
And how do we come first? Have a lot of knowledge, hear the smallest of detail and sprint towards goal (because the combination your knowledge, assumptions and speed is enough to make you reach to the top). You don't ask for specific details, because they are obvious. And that's me in short.
Today i fucked up.
Mistake #1 ) first i was given a small task by my senior. It was a 20 mins task max if i had done it the normal noobie way . But i am a pro in mind , i have to do it with all the architecture , even if i don't understand why. So i asked for 50 mins. They gave it and did not had a problem with my time, but with the way i wrote my code.
He was like "who told you to make it like this ? Why did you made it like this?" And was visibly irritated. And i was like super chill saying "i don't know the why, but i know its correct way of using it" , pissing him even more. In my eyes he's just a super friendly sr, more like a bro and wouldn't mind some cheeky answers. And he didnt show any
consequences for that time.
Mistake #2 this is super fucked up. Our office is going under some renovation & interns were asked to sit in the co-working spaces (outside of the office). It was already very disturbing and i had to go to office every few minutes.
So after lunch this happens : We are working on a new module that already has a tonne of screens and logics. I have made a small part which is from the middle and now we can go both in the forward or in the backward direction.(Also, its quite a new module whose idea was recently discussed and decided. And weirdly i am also being treated like a core member as the ceo once himself asked what would he my flow for doing things in this. i am in direct contact and under direction of backend , designers , ceo and My senior and many ppl are giving me tasks ) And... Aagh fuck it. .. its a long story and i don't feel like repeating it but
inshort :
got a task,
didn't understood it completely and thought its my task to figure it out, took a long time figuring it my self ,
techlead/designer somehow changed my and my sr. direction of flow even tho we were taking a different approach
I sit in a noisy and irritating place
Techlead/designer comes during the time when i am figuring out the solution(already overtime the one in point #2) nags for result.
I get in an argument with him, justifying for my time and arguing that it's difficult to think technical logics for that design
( truth be told, it WAS a difficult logic which he thought was too easy. It consisted of 3 variables and 8 states we were doing different works for 4 of them and rejecting 2 and ... I don't know, i had got that wrong . But that shouldn't had been my problem to solve. I should have gone to my senior and didn't get into argument with tech lead ). It think i might have offended him too.
After he left, i am so angry on him that after sometime my senior comes and i misbehave with him. He just asks to meet me before i go, and i do so. During the meeting we discuss this whole fuck up and how many times i showed him my ego and indiscipline. And then i realise what a fuckup i did due to my ego and lack of asking, blindly following my own over confidence and blindly following or arguing with others.
Fuck fuck fuck6 -
Really Microsoft really you're going to make me upgrade to the new fucking shitty version of Skype. Just let me keep it how it is and fuck right off. I already deal with all your shit in Windows.
20 -
Almost broke my phone out of frustration. Fuck these goddamn companies, their shitty websites, and phone services.
I called to check my credit card balance. I first tried to talk to a person and they transferred me to another department where I listened to a goddamn waiting lobby song that never ended so I tried the other phone service instead.
Bot fuck: "Please enter your credit card number."
Me: *enters credit card number*
Bot fuck: "Sorry, I did not receive any response. Please enter your credit card number."
Me: *enters it again*
Bot fuck: "Sorry, I did not receive any response. Please enter your credit card number."
Me: (ass sweating) *enters the shit again*
Bot fuck: "Enter the last two digits of your mobile number."
Me: *enters the numbers*
Bot fuck: "Sorry, I did not receive any response."
Me: "Fuck you! Fuck youuu!" *enters it again*
Bot fuck: "We'll send a one time password to your mobile number."
Me: *waits*
A few seconds later..
Bot fuck: "Please enter your one time password."
Me: *waits*
Bot fuck: "Sorry, I did not get any response. Please enter your one time password."
Me: "I got nothing, you little shit! Sorry, I did not get any response, you sadistic motherfucker. My veins are popping out."
Bot fuck: "Sorry, I did not get any response. Please enter your one time password."
Me: *hangs up*
Password arrives three minutes after the little shit first said it would arrive which was a few seconds after I dropped the call.
Me: "Fuuuck!!"
Tries to call again, same shit all over again.
Tries the website.
Logs in successfully.
Shit grays out and a notification pops up, "Is your <number> updated?" Only one option is visible, a button that says "no".
Presses button, re-directed to a blank page that never loads. Site is legit, by the way, I checked.
Enables "Desktop Site" in the mobile browser.
Tries again.
Same notification pops up, this time there is a "yes" visible.
Clicks "yes".
Sees information, finally.
Information is not updated.
Throws phone into the sofa. Phone bounces into the wall and then right on the floor.
Fuuuuuuuccccckkkkkkkk! Arrrrgggghhh!8 -
"how did you make that app?"
"nice website, how'd you make it?"
"I thought only geniuses could make x? how'd you make x?"
maybe because I put in half a fucking ounce of effort into making it. please kindly shut the fuck up and realize that I don't care enough to tell you how I did it, because it would take more fucking effort to tell you than to walk away (surprise?). no I will not take your idea in consideration. why? because it's not worth fucking considering. go fuck yourself. and don't ask me the same thing tomorrow you cunt.6 -
Why the fuck does my baggage arrive late at the airport... Why can't it be soon as I need it. Always happens.11
-
To all you fuckers out there giving bad app rating because some shit does not work on your shitty phone and you are to fucking lazy to report the bug via the fucking "send log to dev"-button that pops up with the exception.
Go fuck yourself.
And to all the user whose bugs I fixed and did not change their Bad rating - fuck you too.
And oh.. The fucktards that did not even install the app and give a Bad rating because i am your competitor - guess what...fuck you.9 -
I fucked up. I forgot the password. I already knew I have a really bad memory but then pride came along and told me that I'd remember it this time. Fuck my fucking pride. I fucked up and now I've got to restore this mess.
Fuck.4 -
I'm in deep shit, barely managing myself,
> Fuck Domain resellers who don't know their job (that's not you Jase)
> Fuck GoDaddy
> Fuck cPanel
> Fuck WordPress
That concludes, a friend called in a favor to host a WordPress blog with our hosting and domain from re-seller
and fuck that re-seller with cactus in the ass, for being a hack and saying it is not possible to transfer the domain to my hosting account.13 -
agency lesson 10motherfucking1 . Never take your project managers demands and run with them. Ask 10s, 100s of questions if needed. Layout every little aspect of the project and every little demand and every little asset needed.
They will fuck you in your ass and turn every eye on you when the client gets angry. They will fucking ruin you for the sake of their job.
Cover your ass in every way possible. Do not let your asshole manager define how shit is going down because (say it with me) THOSE WHO CAN DO! THOSE WHO CANT MANAGE!1 -
Fuck me I forgot to eat (was too busy at work) and I lost my chance to eat anything from the cafeteria.
Oh well...vending machine it is.2 -
Fucking fuck you 'executive' sales director.
You come into my office when I'm not here, and then force people to prioritise your shitty fucking customer above a high priority one that I need to go to. I get phoned and told, "You will go there".
Basically, he just prioritised a shitty fucking issue of 3 users over a high priority SLA customer of 140 users.
Getting shat out as I speak about why the high priority is not being done (I need to do DR there, because their server crashed).
Basically said - I am fucked. I either choose to go to the SLA call and then the 'director' fucking loses his shit and hits me, or I go to the call and the MD loses his shit and fucks me up (again).
Fuck this.
Fuck.
Time to get to work! -
I'll just say it: fuck CSS. I seriously loathe working with it. But, I guess I gotta still be good at it if I wanna be a competent web developer, right?12
-
Honestly, fuck Lenovo.
First it's taken well over a year and my phone's not gotten 8.0 yet. And now my phone no longer vibrates. I've had this for less than a year and the piece of shit has broken already.
Last time I'm giving this trash excuse of a company my money.22 -
Fuck academics! End semester exams are ucking waste of time ! Just need to study one night before and on exam ay 'vomit' all my memory onto the paper. Fuck it. I AM done.19
-
Got fucking graduated, a whole day wasted, fucking ass hole literally trapped us cannot even got to release some water.
To get a fucking degree you have to bear with fucking teacher who don't shit about privacy, security.
And answering fucking theroy questions which has fucking string Match with the fucking textbook paragraph.
Do a fucking report which will be fucking 100 pages and take fucking 2 copy (10 rough copies)
The register to fucking leaky placement centre. Who leak you data to all hiring companies as well as your co-students.
Then fucking attend the fucking ass hole ceremony where some old guy lectures for fucking long time about some civil infrastructure , road and other stuff.
And I have not mentioned other fucking ass hole slutty stuff.i don't know fucking until what time I can hold on.
This Fucked the fuck out of me10 -
A rant partially inspired by our favorite angry German.
Are you fucking serious? Why the fuck even publish the stories to your fucking website if you're just going to beg me to download your shitty app?
Why don't you download yourself getting fucked by a chainsaw? Now THAT I'd download you fucking assholes.
2 -
Oh so your deadline is Wednesday and you will travel on Thursday? Let's have a full day meeting on Monday... WELL FUCK YOU TOO!!!
-
I don't understand people who write "Fu*k" instead of "Fuck", dude everyone know what's that means anyway and you definitely not going to become a Honorable man or you will go to heaven by doing this. Seriously.12
-
So recently I wanted to delete a corrupt jpg file.
I could not because "It's corrupted".
Oh dear windows...
...Go fuck yourself!
Oh and also recently I was out of space, so I had to free some by deleting the VMWare Snapshots that were taking up said space.
I couldn't...
...VMWare said it needs more space to be able to delete those files.
Fuck you too VMWare!5 -
Why is fuck as a fucking word used so fucking often??? In like every other fucking rant on my fucking feed...6
-
I just woke up this morning to an email saying that someone from chile logged into my instagram account and I'm not actually what set me of the most.
The fact that my password was leaked, the fact I literally never got notified that I had a Instagram account I never wanted or the you have to disable most privacy settings, just to reset your password.
Like holy fuck, I disabled all options I could find on firefox concerning privacy/tracking and it still tells me I should disable some privacy settings.
So I enabled chrome again (fucking system app) and it worked on first try. Just as expected...
Anyway, fuck instagram and thank you dear hacker for telling me that I had a worthless to delete.5 -
Don't give me Mobile First! Fuck That!
I dev on desktop, most users are on desktop, my client thinks desktop is most important, so why the hell should I put mobile first??
And doublefuck "Offline First".
Get back to earth Google!4 -
Me: *pulls down the quick settings drawer and taps Bluetooth*
phone: *forgets everything about having multiple CPU cores and threads - the process responsible for all user input and drawing the ui grinds to a halt*
me: *sighs* oh, fuck, not this shit again *sets phone down*
*several minutes pass*
*watchdog decides that the UI is stuck and kills it, forcing the phone to soft-reboot*
phone: *boots up after a minute of loading*
me: *checks if Bluetooth is on*
*Bluetooth still off*
me: *tries to tap Bluetooth again*
*the procedure repeats*11 -
FUCK THESE FUCKING GPDR! FUCK THESE SITES! FUCK EVERY LITTLE COCKSUCKING BASTARD POPUP!
I click DISAGREE ON EVERY FUCKING POPUP! YET THESE BASTARDS SELL MY DATA LIKE EXOTIC BUTTERS! FUCK THEM ALL!6 -
Fuck swift and xcode and IOS development
Because every fucking guide and tutorial and code example out there is already outdated including some from last month
Because every relevant pod out there change their specs more often than I change my socks
Because you have to do every fucking thing on your own
Because you have to catch 812375 things that can possibly go wrong
Because making a simple JSON request takes 5 screens of code
Because of the five fucking million typing errors you get every damn minute fuck you swift
Because of the 150 page API docs for the simplest fucking things
Because of all the code lost to xcode crashes every couple minutes
Because Apple promised a language and a framework that allows for rapid hassle-free development yet this is exactly the opposite
Because all the money we're paying for all this shit when it's not worth even 1% of it4 -
The reason for half the web-dev world sufferings is that Microsoft won't stop choking their users with explorer or edge, and half of the client are too dumb or lazy to download a different browser to test stuff. Fuck this shit man! Nothing works the way it should on this bitch.
Everytime my manager says- It should work perfectly on IE because client doesn't have any other browser, I curse IE for exisiting. If you can't improve it, just remove it you freakin' sadists. It'll not be an embarrassment to load something better on your OS. If anything, it'll get people to like you maybe. Like you for accepting your fuckery and making a decision in favor of the web dev world and innocent windows users, who only use your explorer to download other browser asap. For just that one time and for all your arrogance, you're making the whole world suffer.3 -
Start-up life.
Learning to code but must do website.
Must learn illustrator....
Can`t even select a fucking circle without it becoming a splatterod non sensical shapes.
Been at it for 2 weeks.
Boss/friend like. Hey i know its the holidays but lets catch up to see what youve done....
Me. Well... I can fuck up circles ;)9 -
This might not resonate with many ranters here... but FUCK Taylor Otwell & Graham Campbell.
Like, not on a personal level. Maybe they're great to drink a beer with. But as framework devs... fuck everything about them.
Laravel seems so nice, it takes away many annoyances of developing in PHP. Collections are the array object you've always needed. The route bindings, middlewares, request validation objects, it's all sweet.
But eventually your company serves a few million customers, you run into specific performance problems or missing features on a deeper level. You open the issue tracker... and see a few hundred issues about the problems you are encountering, they already exist.
Some just have a short paragraph with a request for a feature, some complete PRs with tests in the style of the framework. All of them closed.
Reasons?
"We don't think anyone will ever need this"
"This seems complicated, you can just do <super non-DRY hacky code>"
FUCK YOU WITH YOUR TODO APP SNIPPETS AND USER-POST-ARTICLE EXAMPLES. I'M NOT BUILDING THE NEXT WORDPRESS. I'M DEALING WITH THE REALITY OF GRAPH DATABASE CLUSTERS, COMPLEX AUDITING LOGS AND A GAZILLION QUERIES PER SECOND.
Sigh... the problem with all these "simple" and "elegant" languages & frameworks is that they don't fucking scale.
Not because the language, server or framework intrinsically can't do it, but because the maintainers are stuck thinking in terms of their retarded non-realistic example apps.
I think I'll go back to my cave and write some Haskell or Rust to calm down.2 -
A big, fat FUCK YOU to everyone who pushes out app-updates with generic "Improvements for speed and reliability" changelogs. I hope you and all your descendants, relatives, friends and pets get huge, hairy, painful warts between your buttcheeks that grow larger every day and return after every attempt to have them removed. Fuck you, and fuck your bullshit updates.
And if there are any devs on devRant guilty of this behaviour, fuck you too. I hope your sexual organs rot and fall off, and that you lose all your upvotes.7 -
What the fuck Microsoft !! Your android apps are total piece of shit! Fucking outlook Android app don't have support to view doc file which is created using your shitty Microsoft teams portal.
If I click on that doc file link through my outlook app, you redirect me to chrome.
Ok that's still acceptable. But the real shit starts now. You tell me that your browser isn't supported! Is this fucking joke?? Who in the world develops a website which can't support latest version of Android chrome?
Now that I have installed your shitty Microsoft teams app, it doesn't show up in "open with" options. Clicking on that link is still redirecting to the chrome saying that browser is unsupported.
Also, your shitty Microsoft teams app can't edit fucking doc file. When I click on your Microsoft word icon, You again ask me to install Android app for Microsoft word.
Seriously fuck you Microsoft and your shitty apps!
1 -
fuck people who need to be hacked to care about security.
i hope everyone who used that early ap scores gets their credit cards stolen because they don't know how to use a vpn.8 -
My fucking pixel XL just broke. Fuck me, fuck this and fuck every fucking thing
I hope I'm not stuck with this broke ass piece of shit I used to use.4 -
Dear Oracle,
why do I have to have an X server running for your stupid Oracle Database to install?
Why are you sometimes capable of writing good software like VirtualBox, and then fuck up simple tasks like creating a docker image for your fucking Database? (Seriously, try it, you will not be able to set up a simple Oracle Database using their official Dockerfiles)
Also, what makes you think that -4 is the "most appropriate exit status"?!
What the fuck is wrong with you?
Fuck you really hard you proprietary piece of shit!
7 -
"less is more" ... except on a FUCKING STACKTRACE, HOW THE FUCKSHIT FUCK SHITFUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO DEBUG YOUR SHITTARDFUCKED BULLSHIT CODE
-
Today i spent one hour and half trying to understand why my ajax request was returning "undefined" instead of a json object. It turns out i had just to restart ionic because of some bug in the ts transpiler.
Fuck you typescript.6 -
FUCK WORDPRESS
FUCK WORDPRESS
FUCK WORDPRESS
FUCK WORDPRESS
FUCK WORDPRESS
Who the fuck thought "Oh lets put all caches in the options table". This is so incredible dumb. The options table has nearly 8GB and is just unusable. The query for the "real options" takes about 3s. To export this fucking shit I had to block the prod server for 20 minutes to get a db dump. I want to womit in the mouth of the fucking idiot who did this.6 -
So I'm approaching a 8 year anniversary working in IT and this feels like the first time needing to do a serious rant.
Today I've come across some code (infact just a single line) written by another company that is so fucking fundamentally stupid that they should be banned from writing any code ever. Like holy fuck.
This is textbook examples of shit never to do ever in any fucking environment or intranet/extranet etc. What the fuck. The fucking muppetry involved in this. This is what they teach novice programmers - you see this code written 20 years ago? Never fucking do this. You see this company that went bust 10 years ago? It was because of shit like this. Never ever write code like this or your 90kg ass will be thrown 300m by the greatest medieval fucking siege engine ever created after we throw you through the catastrophic gaping hole in time and space that your line of code just created.
Fucking fuckity bye.3 -
fuck this. I am done. Going iphone. Tired of apps randomly crashing for no fucking reason whatsoever.24
-
Waking up to another day of being forced to use SVN because my university seems to have a problem with using git. Who the fuck uses SVN now anyway, piece of shit version control.4
-
Fuck my life!!! Fuck it right hard!!! My fucking compiler (the one I code) fucking broke down, and i have to put it to competition it two weeks... Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck: obviously Iost backup and gitHub doesnt seem like wanting to give me that version back... Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck duck!!!!5
-
Can we just take a minute to recognize that clicking on the uninstall button in Windows 10 not actually uninstalling the app and instead opening an uninstall program page, where I need to look up the app again and it sometimes may not even be registered there, is one of the most fucking retarded as fuck piece of shit design decisions in the history of programming design?
How fucking hard is it to just trigger the uninstall for the fucking app? Why the fuck is there an uninstall option in the first place you wet waffle of a designer.5 -
Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK FUCK YOU GOOGLE, you placed a damn email about an interview in the spam box and I only realized it 2 weeks afterwards. END ME, JUST DO IT NOW3
-
Spend >3 days preparing a proposal to a potential client...made it a bit cheaper to get into the company...
Now I'm too cheap to be good apparently...
FUCK CLIENTS!!!1 -
YOU CAN'T, POSSIBLY, BE SERIOUS WITH ME! FUCK, FUCK IT ALL!
THOSE DAMN ENGINEERS WITH A DEGREE AND ALL CAN'T PUT A FUCKING IF IN THE DAMN CODE!
I'M RESTARTING THE DAMN THING, I DON'T WANT AN UPDATE! FUCK! UPDATE THIS SHIT WHEN I HIT THE SHUTDOWN BUTTON AT LEAST!
15 -
I just want to get fucking home... This is the second flight canceled... NO I DONT WANT TO GET IN A FUCKING HOTEL AND FLY TOMORROW...
Excuse me sir your flight was canceled.... SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU FUCKING SLUT
DON'T EVER FLY WITH THOSE FUCKTARDS3 -
Why the *fuck* did Facebook decide to nag users by constantly reminding them of how dumb and miserable they are by showing the old-ass posts from years and years ago?? I don't want to see some random shotpost i posted 5 years ago, i don't give a fuck!!
How the hell uses this anyway? Who on earth cares about his facebook image so much, that sharing this stuff is actually meaningful?
Maybe i'm missing a point, but again my facebook profile is just a wall of memes and vapid shit that i don't care about.
I'm starting to really fucking hate facebook in every way, too bad its the only real way to contact people here in scandinavia...
This country is full of applefags anyway, maybe i should just pack up and move to a country with a more sensible communication platform :D7 -
So I just bought an Intel Optane SSD for my PC, and then this came up...
"Intel® Optane™ Arbeitsspeicher unterstützt keine auf PCIe-Festplatten installierten Systeme"
or in English:
"Intel® Optane™ RAM doesnt support Systems installed on PCIe-Harddrives"
LIKE WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU INTEL! I JUST BOUGHT THIS SHIT AND NOW YOU FUCKING TELL ME IT DOESNT FUCKING WORK BECAUSE I HAVE A FUCKING M.2 SSD WITH WINDOWS ON IT? WHATS WRONG WITH YOU ASSHOLES! FUCK THIS!14 -
Fuck you CNET!
Their app auto plays video ads WITH VOLUME even when THE PHONE IS FUCKING MUTED!!!!!!!8 -
Fuck c++
Everytime I have to use this fucking language it spits up some other bullshit error
`cannot convert std::vector<int>() to std::vector<int>&`
WHY THE FUCK ARE STACK ALLOCATED VALUES EVEN THEIR OWN TYPES
AND WHY CANT I TAKE A GOD DAMN REFERENCE TO IT
JUST WHYYYYY29 -
Reasons i hate Christmas #147
I have job interview tomorrow (27th) and i my hair looks like bum of a vulture with diarrhea
Near me is at least 15 barbershops.
NOT. A. SINGLE. ONE. OPEN. UNTIL TOMORROW
BECAUSE OF CHRISTMAS
Why the fuck has this holiday of manipulation and lies and misery and shit to have so huge impact on normal flow of life for so many days!
I
HATE
CHRISTMAS15 -
man, fuck php.
fuck fucking php fuckitily fucking hard.
basically every fuckin stdlib function it has is fucked in some way.
can't even remember it anymore properly, but...
for example:
explode(" ", "some string like this ");
function to "split a string into array of strings using the first param as the boundary marker.
the above one would return
["some", "string", "like", "this", ""]
BECAUSE I'M FUCKING FUCKITTY SURE THAT WHEN THE LAST CHARACTERS OF THE STRING ARE EQUAL TO THE SEPARATOR STRING, EVERYONE WANTS TO GET BACK ONE EXTRA FUCKING USELESS EMPTY ITEM IN THE ARRAY.
because beyond the last wall of my house, there's another room of my house, you stupid Lerdorf fuck.28 -
And in today’s news: heroic container fills 1Tb drive with logs to crash server. “Fuck Docker” says admin5
-
FUCK MICROSOFT!!! WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!?!?!?!? WHY IS THIS EVEN A THING!?!?!?!?
WHYYYYYY HAVE WE GOT A FUCKING DARK THEME IF WHEN I ADD ANNOTATIONS IN SSIS IT'S HARDCODED COLOURS.
No...seriously...not only am i doing this bullshit waste of time redundant annotations for some bullshit client that thinks they know shit but when I use the dark theme like a normal person, if you go back to a normal theme, all annotations in white.
Just finished like 30 packages on this slow ass remote connection and now all these backward ass people that use light themes (like everyone but me) can't see anything written.
Fuck you Microsoft!!!!! Soooooo many fucks for you right now....don't even know how to express the fucks.4 -
Fuck me, I lost my motivation AGAIN!
I mean, yea, this is a big project and I alone am obviously not enough workforce to do it, but I at least hoped for a prototype. And instead of writing anything like that, I end up writing all sorts of unnecessary modules and wrappers for game engine functions. Grrr.3 -
Fuck LinkedIn
Fuck their closed API
Microsoft always steals your PRIVATE info, but is scared of us using their PUBLIC info
Fucking morons
I can just use selenium and still have all the info I need
Then why the fuck would you close API to approved only
Can't you just track the traffic????7 -
Why is school such a bullfuck, we've learned SQL basics and I've used SQL a little so I thought I won't have a problem. WELL FUCKING HELL WAS I WRONG. Joining 4 tables together with inner join WTF who the fuck uses that, why the fuck do I need to know this, WHY THE FUCK IN A TEST WHEN WE HAVEN'T LEARNED SUCH BULLSHIT. Well how about adding a foreign key to a table that doesnt need one. Well ok have fun with a key that does absolutely nothing and on top of all those convoluted tasks the texts are a mess, they give unnecessary information with grammar of a 9 year old and the pictures are not even readable. They are fucking hieroglyphs.
Fuck school.
Gonna do it by myself at the end anyway.
Fuck everything.15 -
Coding is not the solution to unemployment or gender inequality... This what the MF don't understand.... Until you create a better Sys and population is controlled and there is cultural evaluation. - you MF are just running a circus show.
Every MF want to jump into the bandwagon of cheap CSR - "hey we are empowering people by teaching people how to develop a website , aren't we good peopLE 😊"
Lol like programming is fucking open source, you don't need to teach people, anyone interested can learn it , and they are billion FREE RESOURCES out here for them to learn, so why not just fucking focus on doing something significant than clowning around "become a dev ".
Fuck havard, fuck Google fuck KMPG fuck the fucking dumb Government fuck youth empowerment📌5 -
I want to get started hard on a cool project but I’m stuck watching Silicon Valley.
Fuck my laziness9 -
i need to reinstall windows 10.
but i don't have an ISO.
ok i will Use Media Creation tool from M$ to get one.
I selected to burn directly to USB
and 1 hour and 50% later the AntiMalware blocked autorun.inf and mediacreation tool crashed
fuck fuck fuck fuck
so i'm still here waiting....
but this time i selected to download the ISO and i will burn it later.
i don't know who blame the antimalware or MediaCreationTool.....
i think that i will blame both.2 -
Omg I have to check 2350 svn commits.
We have 2 seperated frontends, one for maintaining old UI and one for new UI which is going to production in one month. So now I have to check if any CR/bug was implemented/fixed only on old UI. Frontend2 was created last year on july. Fuck my life3 -
FUCK OFF MSDN. YOU JUST PUT THIS WHEN THE DEVS ARE TOK LAZY TO ACTUALLY WRITE UP ERROR DOCUMENTATION.
-
Am I the only one who is still using Windows 7 for non geeky stuff?!
Fuck your updates, dear Microsoft. Fuck them.9 -
Fuck this IOS provisioning hell
Fuck this firebase cloud messaging plugin
Fuck outdated documentation of said plugin
Fuck unsolved issues from about 3 years ago on SO
Fuck it all6 -
Using eclipse after a long while on a work laptop and this fucking piece of shit console window popping the fuck up and my cursor auto switching to it is the fucking shit design of a fucking lunatic from the fourteenth circle of hell, where the eternal punishment in addition to being roasted alive, probably includes being forced to fucking use eclipse.
Did I mention fuck eclipse? Fuck, I don't even care if I did. Fuck eclipse again.
Oh and to add on, if you're thinking of making the very useful suggestion that it's very easy to turn off window focus with just two buttons, then fuck you and the guy who designed that shitty UI fucking button.3 -
So I shouldn't have written that Linux issue rant. While I'm spending whole fucking day to figure out how to fucking set my fucking secondary monitor to full resolution, the fucking WINDOWS of my designer's PC got BSOD and failed repair.
fuckingShit fucktard full of fuck operation systems with their full of fuck bugsssssss 😠😠😠😠😠
I'm so fucking mad
8 -
fucking flutter.
i'm trying to make a simple app. it would be an easier to do both natively.
for fucks sake flutter, add some functionality. flutter recently got out of beta but it's not fucking done. no native webviews, no native push notifications. fuck that.
however, i do have to give credit where credit is due. coming into flutter i expected a different feel of the app on iphone and android. it was exactly the same, and it was smooth too. in that respect, i love flutter.
also guys, i have an app (not finished yet) i built with flutter and i would like some constructive criticism for changing the ui. only android right now though, i can't afford ios.
dictive.app/download6 -
Appreciate you clear vision, fucking devs. It sucks for us to be powerless without eyeglasses. Fuck this shit! Fuck it.4
-
Was watching a dev stream on twitch and noticed the following code on screen:
if (blah blah blah) {
int fuck = 0;
mysql_blah_blah(blah, blah, &fuck);
} -
Fucking docker on arch linux. Jeeez fucking hell.
Use docker to run the wallet they said. It works just fine they said. Fuck that.
Internet is not working in docker and i have no clue why. Hours into debugging it and still nope.
If anybody has more experience with docker on arch then please tell me how to fix this shit. Yes i have tried sudo sysctl net.ipv4.conf.all.forwarding=1 and sudo sysctl net.ipv4.ip_forward=1
Both of which did bullshit. Still no internet. Fuck this shit.24 -
It is so funny how this PM got dizzy when I started detailing all the possibilities of her generic requirements and asking for clarification and we started drawing how the fuck she wants in to be.
But "just put all data on the report" should be simple, right?
Not a 2 hours discussion on one topic out of 10, right?
Not.3 -
Seriously fuck Microsoft. I'm not one of those entitled brats but Microsoft can't do anything right. Not even a fucking web page. Seriously what the fucking fuck is this shit? I'm trying to download this fucking driver and every where I look links me to this fucking page. This is just beyond lazy
I'm desperately looking through the console hoping to find this (probably) shitty drivers download link. So damn annoying
12 -
Fuck this shit!!!
So I've also ordered that 1$ Pro Pack Unixstickers.
They came today morning and when I opened it there was only 2 FUCKING STICKERS!!!!!!! Fuck it! Never going to order again. I've totally lost the faith ordering something from overseas.10 -
Man, I sure am glad that FUCKING MOBILE SAFARI no longer obeys my viewport scale rules. It's really awesome how ALL of my projects now focus in on text inputs and then zoom so that the site feels broken after that when the user scrolls away. This was the last little bit of control we had to make our websites feel like apps. FUCK2
-
Fuck ms, fuck azure, fuck azure b2c, fuck azure b2b, fuck azure ad, fuck ms once again, fuck my company that decided to switch from another hell to this hell2
-
Shit fuckin fuck shit damn [put whatever bad word you want here]
My phone fell on the ground and this time got hit on that specific weak spot that caused a ripple of cracks on the glass screen.4 -
Last night I was up until 3am because the fucking unity and the fucking Android SDK can't put together an structure without mi intervention.
It appears that since SDK 23 Google decided to move some libraries from tools to build-tools, but unity keeps trying to find that library in tools, obviously this error doesn't have any specific documentation and i spend around 5 hours downloading SDKs and trying to figure out what happen, till I found one tiny post in unity forum with only one answer.
I mean, on one side, this has changed since android 23 and the folks in unity can't change his fucking compiler yet, and on the other side, why the fuck Google change libraries from one place to another
Also, as a note to Google, your new system for SDK-only download its super shitty and full of problems, I don't know why you change it.1 -
Day ruined, cos some fucker paid to do something has fucked up and delivered, 3 days late, a crock of shit. I spent fucking ages with clear instructions and everything to avoid this fucking situation, yet here we are. Fuck shit fuck tits wanker.
-
I just realised how much I fucked up. This whole 2 days I was working on something and new and new bugs were showing up every fucking minute. I get it now. It was a fucking sign the whole logic was fucked. Oh fuck me!
-
FUCK LINUX part 932.5
Actually systemd, I know it's !== linux but it comes with linux so fuck them both, fuck ALL OF IT
*systemd service file*
[...]
StandardOutput=append:/myshit.out.log
StandardError=append:/myshit.err.log # erm... please?
[...]
*logs*
yeah fuck this guy, let's all go to /var/log/messages29 -
I have to try to Learn PHP with SQLite in a fucking night it’s not even for anything big it’s just a basic login page for some students that are coming in to visit. but it has to all be working on this Friday. fuck. I’m just gonna learn enough to get by these few days. Then continue what I actually have been doing I guess6
-
Android force-updated itself without my permission and it appears they've removed the "open applications" menu altogether. If not, it's well and completely hidden.
Getting fucking sick of my phone and other devices being at the mercy of Mommy Microsoft, Daddy Google and Auntie Apple. Fuck them. I have zero control over my electronics anymore.
EDIT: It's there, but it only works if you're already in an app - not from the home screen. Because that makes fucking sense.3 -
if (!rant) Fuck oranges
else
It's about time we make some God fucking damn things fucking God fucking clear. What the fuck does programming have to do with fucking non-programming?
Honestly. Fucking fucks pretending to be fucking programmers (probably not you, but fuck off if you're one of those fuckers.) FUCK SUCH PEOPLE FUCK YOU FUCK FUCK fuck FUCK!
There. Now that's out there. Leave fucking programming to the fucking fuckers who fucking know some-fucking-thing fucking ab-fucking-out it. If you're learning, ask questions, without you there'd be no fucking future for good fucking programmers. But if you're a fucking fuck fucking ducks in the fucking park--fuck the God fucking damn the fuck OFF!3 -
Yesterday a colleague was debugging some piece of typescript code for memory leaks as chrome and firefox were hanging at a certain page.
Her real brainfuck was that everything seemed to be working fine with edge. Microsoft, somehow, finds a way to fuck with developers. -
How the fuck is visio the worst fucking tool ever. For some obtuse reason, I can't move a text box. At least tell me why your being an uncooperative asshole, instead of showing the new position, and then not moving the damn thing! Its like trying to get a cat to play fetch.1
-
The fuck-game:
First I write fuck once, then someone answers that saying fuck twice, followed by either me or someone else saying fuck three times in the same comment.
Person 1
Fuck
Person 2
Fuck fuck
Person 1
Fuck fuck fuck
Person 3
Fuck fuck fuck fuck
The game goes on until someone accidentally types "duck" instead of duck. At that point, the world cries.14 -
can you guys look at the design of my app?
https://play.google.com/apps/...
kinda ugly imo.
also please fuck around and find bugs.
thanks!
ps it's my first flutter app8 -
Red Dead Redemption 2 Day - Awesome
No managers in today - fucking win
Work from home day - Can we get anymore wins?
Remote into computer that works for everyone - TODAY IT DONT FUCKING WORK -_-
Guess its a normal ass work day today and it's raining, fuck you Earth. No one is allowed to play RDR2 until I get home2 -
FUCKING FUCK WINDOWS FUCKINGHANGS IN LOCK SCREEN AFTER WAKEUP FROM SLEEP FOR THE THIRD FUCKING TIME TODAY FUCK YOU WINDOWS. JUST CAN'T REBOOT EVERY FUCKING TIME3
-
fuck the overengineered bulshit that ZF2 is... fuck crappy mvc in web, fuck shitty design, tuck events, fuck 'security feature' that obfuscates the fucking redirect login/logout urls fuck not having your full link, but just the path everywhere, fuck whitelabeling, fuck somebody's sister, fuck me and fuck you....1
-
Fuck you Redis
Goes in a docker container, calls bgrewriteaof, get success, checks info - no pending writes, last write success.
Tries to scp to remote, fails - Unexpected AOF
Decides to shut down the local redis to be able to port, in case it's blocking it
Calls redis-cli shudown (expect to just shut redis down rigth)
It fucking deleted all my data, now I see the docs
"Flush the Append Only File if AOF is enabled."
Why the fuck? Fuck you redis, fuck you1 -
Every time I can write like a few more words and then the fucking phone rings again aaaand so fucking on.
Fuck This -
Fuck you Android ! Why the fuck does making my fucking status bar transparent has to be more difficult than launching a mars mission with a team of chimpanzees. I have been trying everything from xml styles to fucking java code but the status bar won't take the tint. Been at this fucking shit for 2 days3
-
I also like to listen music while coding but what the fuck guys some people really irritate with the music. They constantly singing with the music.. Seriously I mean constantly they are just fucking irritating. Fuck them.
Hence it makes irritate with music too. -
Fuck Drupal. Fuck the work environment I have, and fuck CMS in general.
I have a task that consists into removing any @extend from the different SCSS files so the compiled file is lighter than before (so far it went from 10mb to 750kb). Everything went okay but suddenly PHP decides that the fuckton memory it has isn't enough anymore and wants more. And makes VirtualBox freeze. Which makes Windows 8.1 freeze. It's 11:10 AM when I write these lines and I haven't been able to do SHIT since 9 AM.
The lead developer just told me "you touched some PHP code you shouldn't have approached in the first place". DUDE I haven't written anything in PHP IN TWO WEEKS !
Also, why does fucking Kint exists, when Laravel has dd() and Symfony has var_dump, and they work as fine as Kint, but they don't need 580 Tb of RAM to run and load a fucking page?
Having to work with this fuckery of a CMS is something, but having to work with Windows 8.1 makes me feel like working on some cancer with a computer built before the first World War
Now I finally go back to work, that's cool, I only lost 2h30 of my fucking day doing nothing but restarting VirtualBox and my fucking computer. FUCKING YAY.1 -
Fuck ruby. I've spent less time learning the ecosystems of java, golang, node, and docker combined compared to the shit ruby is flinging at me like some sort of deranged baboon10
-
Stuck on 1 website project for 2 months. Client is making changes to the project each time we go and have meeting with them.
GM be like, we will do it for free as part of our service.
What the fuck?6 -
So I was thinking about learning to write some Go code. I downloaded it and it didn't work. I struggled for hours just to get it to execute a file, but I could not get it working for packages.
Never have I stumbled upon a language that's working AGAINST me.
I gave up, Go beat me. I removed everything on my computer related to Go. Fuck Go!8 -
ok i'm fucking serious right now. the dumb rocket was going to (now is) the most powerful robot in space. then they had to delay, for HIGH WINDS? what the FUCK? a rocket that can carry 130,000 lbs CANT handle HIGH WINDS. what the fucking fuck fuck fuck. seriously how the fuck fuck fuck. fuck.2
-
Fuck
Threw together a quick Python/Qt app that would have been exactly what we were looking for...but no...the one class method I absolutely *need* isn't available in pyside2 yet.
Stupid asshats can suck my bologna pony.6 -
FUCK JAVASCRIPT!!! I JUST DECIDED TO LEARN DAMN EXPRESS AND NODEJS THEN I HAVE ISSUES WITH ROUTING ISSUES WITH VIEW ENGINES !!! ARGH!!! ITS SO SICKENING I HAVE TO REQUIRE() SHIT AND SHIT WTF??? JS?? WTF JS?? 50 LINES OF CODE FOR JUST A VIEW THAT SAYS "HELLO WORD" AHH FUCK IT, ***FALLS BACK TO PHP** BYE.7
-
PISSED.
Fucking Docker, for no fucking reason (no updates, no changes, etc), I tried booting it up following the morning ritual, and nope, ERR_EMPTY_RESPONSE when connecting to my current project (means I managed to connect but for some reason no data is sent). Nginx container doesn't yell about anything.
Everything around works. Accessing the container works. Even pinging my dev domain works. Why the fuck suddenly fucking Docker just **stops**?!
Restarted Hyper-V, updated laradock, recreated containers, disabled AcrylicDNS. NOPE.
"Fuck you Phlisg, I'm not in the mood today" <lunatic Docker is lunatic>
ARG. -
Long time no rant...
Just fuck apple.
I’m working in partnership with an startup as iOS dev.
We have payments in our app since it was released couple years ago. And everything was ok. Two months ago we implemented a subscription based program that granted our user access to a few things that we need to process manually. I specified that because in apple’s guidelines states that services consumed outside app are not allowed to be sold using inapp purchase and you have to implement your own payment method.
All nice and good we used what we had already in place and the updated was approved. Same for the next 6 versions. Now we discovered a quite critical bug and fixed and submitted a new update just so apple would reject it because we are using subscription that is not implemented using their fucking store kit. So they can’t get those 30% share cut.
Fuck them fuck their echo system fuck their overpriced product. I’v just abandoned my 15” mbp mid2015 in favor of a hackintosh just because my mbp was dying from high temps. Fuck it i’m almost done with mobile development after 6 years2 -
Sitting at my table in the office.
Not doing nothing for about 20 minutes.
Thanks (fuck you) windows update.
Sincerely,
an engineer that nearly has a home (finally). -
So I just woke up and there is an internet outage in my neighborhood because optimum sucks balls, fuck the whole stupid low class internet service
Now I have to leave my house so I can work -
Why do people have fucking problem when I just wished you for something
Why the fuck do you want to know how the fuck I came to know
And come on I didn't wish some unknown person for something too personal
I wished a professor for the birth of daughter
Why the fuck would you go on a spree on fucking around and sadden someone who just wanted to wish you
I would from now on discontinue to wish anyone anything and not even try to contact someone unless it's my business to do so
I'd like to be alone from now on
I'm not a people's person15 -
Spent the last couple hours of the day trying to solve issue in my code and fuck I feel so dump after fixing it! A tiny tiny issue can fuck your code and fuck your brain!1
-
Fuck! After spending the day playing shit with our servers FS to extract more space, I had to restart the servers for the changes to be applied all this because of a shitty architecture and a minor desire from the management!
The ssh server didn't start with the server, what am I supposed to do now..4 -
So I just spent 8 hours migrating our git projects from bitbucket to gitlab because SOMEONE thought backups were being done nightly without ever actually checking. Of course the only backups to be found were well over a year old and the fucking bit bucket licence expired ao migration was entirely fucking manual... CHECK YOUR FUCKING BACKUPS, FUUUCCCCKKK!!!!! At least have the common courtesy of putting something in place to report on failing backup procedures.
Oh and another thing: FUCK YOU ATLASSIAN! RIGHT UP THE ASSE WITH A RUSTY, RABIES RIDDEN, AIDS INDUCING PITCHFORK SIDEWAYS! Who the flying fuck names their repos numbers? Thanks for nothing you mind numbingly incompotent apes...
On a cheerier note, how's everyones day been?2 -
Right, budget constraints, in out project. Shop site. Lets go with a good online shop system (shopwired) and just brand up a suitable theme. Client wants to see design flats prior to starting. OK brief designer. Pick one of the themes that is close to their current brand styling. Grab the theme pages, set your browser to 1280. Mock up over the top with brand colours/fonts etc in Indesign and png the pages over to me (make sure we have them on google fonts). Designer comes back a few days later with branded up theme page visuals. Cool, they look great, shouldn’t take too long to rework the css and get this thing working. Client approves mockups. Great, so open the theme files and realise the designer has fucking moved stuff around. This has turned into something more than a styling job. Fucking hell. there goes my budget and deadline. Why don’t you designers ever fucking listen!!!!!
I should’ve done it myself but needed to save time as I’m already busy. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! -
Why the fuck do I have to follow DB lectures when I fucking know all the stuff already? Fuck you university and your policies about attendance!4
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