Shopping for fridge with sister in law.

"Yeah that one is nice but it doesn't have an app"

"Why do you need an app for your fridge"

"I don't know, but this other fridge has an app, so I think if it doesn't have an app it's not that good"

"But it's very energy-efficient, silent and spacious. The one with the app is the same size, has a worse energy rating, is noisier and is more expensive as well"

"Yeah I know but if there's no extra features that's kind of boring"

"You are everything that's wrong with modern consumers"

Current PM in the morning: "Startup flexibility! I'm at the beach chilling in the sun! I trust you can do standup without me! #tech-detox #positive-energy"

Current PM in the afternoon: "ARE ALL THE FUCKING TASKS FUCKING DONE YET? THERE ARE ONLY 9 DAYS LEFT IN THE FUCKING SPRINT! WHY HAS NOTHING BEEN DEPLOYED YET?"

This is why I hate wireless earbuds: You don't have a wire available for strangling coworkers.

🦫Me a kid: I hope some day I will earn enough $ to by a cool-ass PC and play games on highest graphics presets

🤡Me an adult: I sure did earn enough $ to afford a cool-ass PC though it is a shame that I cannot find time & energy to play games

I was once working for a company as a part time dev in the centrum of my city.

After working there for almost 1 year I noticed that I didn't get paid the last 2 months. I think it was about 500 euro's. (1 day per week).

So I went on my bike to the company to see whatsup. I came into the store and told my boss I hadn't been paid for 2 months. Even tho I did work.

He then got so angry! Just started yelling "YEAH BECAUSE THE PROJECT ISNT NEAR COMPLETE, NOTHING IS WORKING" I explained him the panel still had to be configured and that everything he asked me to do had been programmed and he then fucking told me he wanted it a different way even tho we clearly discussed it WEEKS AGO and he clearly said what he wanted. so he wanted dont revisions. I told him that this is not possible at this moment because holidays are around the corner and I want to go om vacation. (and he too!!!)

He then got so fucking angry he said "come with me for a second" we walk to the door of the building and then he just pushed me out of there and kicked me in my back.

I got so fucking pissed, I opened the door and asked him if je thinks this is a normal way to discuss. He closed the store door again, and I couldnt hold back anymore. I threw my full can of Red Bull against the glass door. The can exploded, and his whole fucking window had energy drink on it. He took some fucking steal pipe, so I walked back. But while trying to get away I jumped on his store sign. Which broke into pieces (they are quite expanasive). He came outside with his fucking pipe and he was trying to hit me. We had a crowd and people started yelling at him. I walked away but the asshole took my bike and put it inside his store. So that I couldnt leave.

So than I called the cops and reported him. For minor assault and some other things. Shortly after I deleted the entire project from his stupid server.

I really dont know this kinda shit happends, he probably felt like I didn't deserve that money even tho I did everything he asked for within deadline. Trying to solve it after vacation was also not an option. I signed him up for a few news letters after that.

In the darkest of days, I discovered how to remote login to my computer at work through the company vpn. I then proceeded to work overtime at night in secret for a week or so, writing documentation and refactoring code.

I finally woke the fuck up and realized that I shouldn't be obsessing over proprietary codebases that do not belong to me, and I should put this misguided energy into my own projects.

So yeah, as a bad dev habit I'm working on fixing, this fits the bill.

CS graduates that have never gone beyond "Hello World", fuck college and it's "system".

So the actual victims of the story are friends of mine, CS colleagues, but I can't help but share as the existence of code freeloaders enfuriates me.

At college in order to graduate you need to present a project in form of a thesis a side from your actual thesis, there is a shortage of pre-approved projects and everyone wants one.

A talented friend of mine who has many years of programming experience got in one with another friend of mine and a lady who I've never seen before. One Saturday night my friend and I were having some beers at a local bar and his phone didn't stop beeping so I jokingly said:

"Bro, tell your girl you need some space", he laughed and explained it was the chick from her project having some "issues" with node.

"So? Tell her to google it, it's Saturday night", he explained the girl has never coded before even though she's about to graduate so she had take it upon herself to pressure him to finish ASAP so she can graduate and get an already agreed position at the federal energy commission... As dev!

I've seen my bud in a lot of dumb calls with said chick trying to explain how you CAN'T COMPILE THE NODE WEBSERVER TO A .EXE!

It frustrated me how such an idiot can go through a CS major buying homeworks and getting low self-esteem geeks to code for her. Then I realized that as an aspiring InfoSec guy, lazy idiots coding is good for business.

People/companies talking about ooh we want gender diversity we want more female software developers, IT professionals etc

You talk the talk, do you know how to walk the walk?? Do you know how to deal with female engineers?

I am a hardcore engineer worked and studied majorly with men for years. I lead, managed teams had my own company worked as a consultant for years.

Then I got into the IT industry as developer later. I was completely against the idea of being female would make any difference or you would be treated differently.

Finally I had my own enlightenment and stopped resisting that idea.

Some treatments made me think what are these guys doing? Don’t treat me like your sister. I am not your sister. Don’t see the femininity or looks. I am not a Merrilyn Monroe to say oooh you are great you know soo much. I am not paid for that act, I do my job! It’s same as yours mate.

Don’t underestimate me or try to preach me as if I am a cute little girl. Don’t show off and boost your ego next to other guys.

Now I regretfully I agree the ladies ranting about male dominance and getting different treatment in IT.

I am literally trying to avoid red nail polishes or red lipstick god forbid. Maybe I should put some fake beard and a belly, loose jeans with an energy drink in hand. Here comes the expert IT professional, already ticking a box.

Honestly you are not taken seriously most of the time. If you are a guy then they are all ears..And those guys talk about they want gender diversity blah blah

You feel like a ghost when you express your opinion. You are not taken into account even when you have a comment or suggestion.

Even humiliated by a guy giving me a speech about how to be a good developer next to a manager. Look buddy I am not a yesterday’s child. I am at your age. I haven’t come to this position by jumping around picking flowers in a field. If I was a man, would you dare saying those to me? There could be a street fight coming.

LinkedIn selfie takers with body show offs putting ooh I am an IT recruiter as a female I got into IT. You can do it too. (don’t get me wrong I respect that achievement that’s good) but those girls get thousands of likes and applauses, you are working in IT for years people say they are seeking for. Your technical post doesn’t even get 20 likes. Your encouraging comment on a guy’s post isn’t even acknowledged. You are not even taken into account. Am I a ghost or something?

Honestly I don’t understand.

What do you mean by gender diversity? What do you want here?

Leave this gender bullshit. Look at the knowledge you don’t even know what equality means. It’s not having even numbers of genders. It is respecting knowledge and hard work regardless. Listening and acknowledging without judgement. Looking beyond male, female or others

Companies that say we want to have more females, you don’t come and knock on my door either. You are already stating a difference there. Attract with indifference don’t come and tell me you are a female we want more females here.

I’m telling you this sector is not getting proper gender equality for 25 years. Talk is there but mentality is not yet there.

I am super pissed off and discouraged today. I don’t even get discouraged that easily. Now I understand some women in IT talking about insecurities. I am on the edge of having one, such a shame.

Don’t come at me now I would bite!

This is my generalisation yes. Exceptions apply and how good it would have been if those exceptions were dominant.

OK heavy rant on 'modern' software development coming! --> don't take it to seriously though :-)

Electron... why does that shit exist? It is like stacking all the worst technologies available to mankind into an enormous pile of crap and polishing that turd to look like something wonderful. It is big, slow and overall AWFUL!

An example? ... Microsoft Teams :-( it burns your PC like fire and makes it squeal for mercy.

When a library/framework becomes the ultimate evolution of abstraction layer upon abstraction layer and it simply should stop to exist and a reset button needs to be pressed.

I would love to see some research on the real world environmental impact that all those shitty slow and bloated web technologies have.

Solution:

Software energy label!

C, C++ and Rust e.t.c. and all accompanying efficient UI libraries should be the only languages/implementations allowed to get a A, B and C label.

Python (without C libraries like Numpy), JavaScript and all those other slow interpreted scripting/Web API nonsense should get a D, E or F label by default.

Have fun!

I’m pissed.
I had previously ranted about being assigned to a very messy project. I spent 3-4 months alone adding features and CLEANING things up.

Recently, there had been talks about a new major development phase on this project. But things lingered and the day before I’m to go on vacation, I get the news that this new phase starts in 2 days. Since I’m going to be on break they’re putting other guys on the project who don’t know anything about it.

Fast forward two weeks later.
I’m back from vacation.

I find out one of the guys has strong opinions about doing things certains ways… but unfortunately they are "ways" of unnecessary complexity, abstraction and verbosity.
After just a couple of weeks I’m already lost in the complexity of his code, which supports features of VERY LOW complexity. Fuck, has he ever heard of KISS? Has anybody heard of it where I work?

Now I have to spend my mental energy trying to make sense of this pile of crap rather than actually spending it getting things done.

Isn't it disturbing that all major operating systems disrespect the computer's ability to do things? Everyone is becoming a walled garden, and people are increasingly developing and limited languages that consume more resources than they deliver value. Today VisualStudio on a corei7 is less performant than a Delphi 5 running on a Pentium 166mhz.

Much of its processing, energy and carbon emissions are used to display ads that "interest you".

Well, thank you *BSDs, Linux (except Ubuntu) and Illumos, for continuing to respect my computer's capabilities.

I have not remotely had the energy to post here. Nor reply. And it is a shame because most of you I consider friends. And if not friends, at least excellent aquitances.

People make comments, I dont reply. People make threads, and I dont respond. People make ++s, and I'm a ghost.

I enjoyed shitposting, and asking questions, and hopefully entertaining some of you. I really do.

I'm just in a funk where nothing seems to matter right now and I dont know why, pr how to get out of it.

I have threads, and responses from scor, nanos, nachoscode, and a dozen others I usually enjoy interacting with and it's like all the life has just been sucked right out of me.

I feel isolated and alienated from everything and everyone and I dont know why or when it started. Its just..there. nor how to talk about it.

I think I'm becoming a misanthrope or something. The more I go on with this sensation, the less I want to be around people, and I dont understand why.

Electric cars are not better for the environment. All petrol cars combined are only responsible for 7.9% of CO2 emissions. If your electric car is charged from a grid that is powered by a coal-burning power station, it contributes nothing to dealing with climate change. It only provides you with the false sense of security, and you can look cool telling your friends that “you know, I drive a Tesla, I’m environmentally conscious, your gas car is bad”.

Electric cars are lame. When I’m out of fuel, I can refuel fully in minutes. With electric car, I’ll have to wait at least five hours. Let’s be realistic, superchargers aren’t common, and will never be.

Gasoline is 46.4 MJ/kg, or 34.2 MJ/l. Li-Ion is 0.36–0.875. Let’s be generous and say it’s 0.9. To match 1 kg of petrol, I would need 51 kilos of batteries.

Average gas tank is 18 gallons, or 68 litres. To match that, my battery must have a weight of 2.5 metric tonnes. Bear in mind, empty battery and full battery has the same weight. Also, bear in mind, batteries perform worse in the winter.

As per energy density and practicality, things don’t get much better than petrol. Liquid hydrogen has higher energy density, but to store it, gas tank has to have very, very thick walls, to withstand the pressure. And, hydrogen is a bitch. It’s extremely dangerous. You can’t smell it until it’s too late. Hydrogen-air mixture will explode if you look at it the wrong way.

All that “electric cars good for climate” hype is merely Elon maintaining his stock bubble.

Update:

The wasp is still alive.

I walked in today to find the damn buzzy mother-earth-fucker on the window. It doesn't have much energy now, and I didn't let it out because mofo got the chance a million times over to just leave me the fuck alone. So I just let it be. no idea where in the lab it is hidden now, and the robots will watch him all night, every night.

And you know what, I'm not gonna open the damn window for it ever again.

(Sat in my hoodie, wrapped, the whole day and was paranoid about it flying and sitting on me, but the war is on. He won't get out of this lab alive. )

taxes. what the actual fuck? I finally graduated and got my first 6 figure job, only to find out the federal government basically takes 1/3 of my pay??? WHAT??? Why are we all okay with this? I feel fucking robbed. I worked so hard to get here, so many sleepless nights, so many all nighters studying, just to get 1/3 of my money stolen from me? what the fuck?????

Ever dealt with people who don’t understand a damn thing they’re coding and just copy and paste stuff around and say that it works? It’s amazing how long people can skate by with only knowing 50% of how what they’re working on works.

We had some dumb know it all on our team who would regularly ship half-done stuff to production and then scramble to fix it after the users bitched about how it didn’t meet the requirements.

This stupid person changed an else to an if having no idea what any of the logic did in this section of code, didn’t adequately test it, and it somehow made it through code review because the better devs were out of office.

This bullshit goes to production, fucks up 200,000 records, and users start complaining about it. Shitty developer refuses to revert the offending code until multiple people on the team overrule them. They spend the next week unfucking the data and decides to just take a day off on Wednesday because it’s been “too much mental energy to fix.” The shit wasn’t even fully resolved yet.

Some people seriously do not belong in this industry. This person’s thought process was:
“Changing an else to an if can’t possibly have significant consequences. Let’s just change this so my code change executes to see what happens.”

Still not sure how they weren’t fired when this happened. They unfortunately got to quit on their own two months later.

I appreciate Minecraft and Minecraft mods. Teaching kids to eat tasty animals, and make glue from blood. There is a mod the literally makes glue by putting horses in a smelter. You can even heal the horse and keep it alive indefinitely. In constant agony. lol

Although, the idea that you can sustainably produce energy from wood is a bit suspect. Thankfully mods jumped in with nuclear reactors for real power generation.

Had a miserable evening yesterday. Me and my gf planned going out around 9pm to this movie with 2 other couples. Movie was kinda okay and we finished around midnight and went over to our apartment for drinks. We had lots of snacks and drinks ready, other couples brought some drinks.

Evening was kinda weird, guests were mainly just ranting about their work and household life and 2 hours in they started asking each other wether they should go home. In the end they left around 3am. I felt kinda defeated: some effort went into planning everything, and in the end I didnt feel much of a connection to them.

Maybe everyone was tired after a workday + late movie + drinks after the movie. But idk I expected more from people in late 20s. When planning we had two options: meeting on saturday or friday and they chose friday.

Anyways I guess either we are getting older or we just need to meet less often and more early in order not to run out of energy and stuff to talk about.

i don't think that i'm having a burnout but i think that i'm maybe not so far away from it... several people, including friends, my therapist and also a colleague, told me they see me at risk of sliding into a real burnout.

i've known this for longer that i have a crappy work life balance. the habit of making work the most important part of my own life. thinking about work even in my private time, when i fall asleep, when i wake up in the night or in the morning. the tendency to think about problems, plans, coworkers, not being able to quit work mentally. the idea that i have to prove to everybody at work that i'm awesome. the feeling that, after a work day, i'm just "waiting" at home for the next day, in idle mode, so i can continue working on a problem (like a bug) that's occupying my whole mind. and at the same time, feeling totally empty after work, having no energy. i've lost interest and quit several hobbies in the last two years that once were important for me. and i think one important reason is that i didn't have any mental energy left to deal with that.

another factor for this development was also the pandemic for sure, because for some time, i had no real social life except for that at work.
but more important is probably that i find my job most of the time really fun and am highly motivated. i have the tendency to say yes to everything and to really commit to and own the problems that are handed to me. (right now, however i feel like there's not much motivation left)
then again there is the feeling that what i do is never good enough, i have little self confidence in my own abilities as a software engineer. there's a big discrepancy between how i myself perceive my work and how other people do (not only at work). on a rational level, i know that what i do is at least "good enough", otherwise i wouldn't have this job, and i wouldn't receive this amount of positive feedback from people. but it's hard to really deeply understand this thing, when there are deep-rooted beliefs like "only perfect is good enough" or "your colleagues will be disappointed and get a negative idea of you (and something bad will happen), if you don't give your best"... and there's also this idea that i have to be this super nerdy person who also codes in their free time, reads IT magazines and stuff, because only then i will fit this stereotype of a software developer, and only then i can be taken seriously and be good enough. no matter if this is fun for me or not.

anyway, right now i'm at a point in life where i'm realizing all this not only rationally, but with full emotional impact... :/ my life feels like it's gone stale and empty. i've lost creativity, warmth and human connection and that hurts a lot.

i'm trying to change my life.
one thing that really helps me right now is to talk with people who have (made) similar experiences. can you relate? if yes, how do / did you address those problems? i would really appreciate to hear your stories...

I have COVID. I started getting symptoms last Sunday.

I close on the house on the 5th of July.

We have a moving pod scheduled to arrive at our apartment on the 5th and were planning on leaving to start making the move the 7th.

I have no energy.

This timing sucks.

I think I used to rage more at complete idiots when I was younger because I had the time and energy to do so

Now I've seen it at least a million times and just don't give a shit anymore

Another day, another shitty set of JIRA tickets.

In this week's edition, we run into an issue you'd think is a meme, something you couldn't even make up: three tickets with IDENTICAL titles, but miraculously, they actually refer to three DIFFERENT tasks! (Also comical, they're not bugs, they're tasks, but mouth breathers don't really know the difference, and at this point I just don't have the energy to attempt to explain what could be explained to elementary school children.)

I present a rare look into our national archives!

This document features two exhibits:

Exhibit A: product owner's original ticket titles

Exhibit B: translated-into-competency-because-i'm-not-mentally-deficient ticket titles

Just more proof that 'product owners' don't own shit, the devs are the real ones who actually know what is going on.

I mean just LOOK at Exhibit A's titles. As a big smart manager, do you write those tickets, smile, and say to yourself "Ah, yep, that's very clear, I'll definitely remember what each of these mean literally 5 seconds from now!"

Is asking for literally 30 seconds more of thought too much to ask for? Apparently.

Just kill me

Happy friday ☠️

them: welcome new project members, this is our CI/CD pipeline which is completely different from the rest of the company, there won't be any great knowledge transfer, we just expect you to be able to know and use everything. but also, we expect you to work on your tasks and don't waste any time.
me: okay, so my tasks aren't going as fast as expected, because I need to invest some learning so i can set up my project correctly.
later: some help would be nice, i'm stuck right now
coworker: *helps me to fix my problems, which were partly due to misconfigured build servers* i know it's a lot, and unfortunately, for this topic sources on the web aren't so good. i can really recommend this book, this will give a deeper understanding of the topic.
me: okay, yeah i mean, tbh, i'll read the book if the project invests some time for me so i can learn everything that's required, but this won't happen. also, some initial workshop on the topic or anything would have been nice.
coworker: well, i mean, i am a software developer. for me, it is normal that i learn all that stuff in my free time. and i think that's what the PM expects from us.
me: okay, that's fine for you, i mean, if i'm interested in a topic, i will invest my private time. but in this case, PM would just expect me to do unpaid labor, to gain knowledge and skills that i can use in this specific project. i'm not willing to do that.
coworker: ...
me: ...

it's not that i don't want to learn. the thing is that there isn't any energy left by the end of the day. i'm actually trying to find some work life balance, because i don't feel balanced right now, haven't felt since i started this job.
also, this is only one of several projects i'm working on. it's like they expect me this project has top priority in my life. if it wasn't so annoying on different levels, maybe i'd have a more positive attitude towards it.

also, at the moment i find it fucking annoying that i have to invest so much time in this dev ops bullshit and this keeps me from doing my actual work.

if they are unhappy with my skills, either they can invest in my learning or kick me out. at this point, either is fine for me..

That time when I ranted about wanting to commit suicide but not having enough energy to go and buy a gun.

That day in the evening, I asked my GF: "I think that the whole life is a humongous rationalization on top of biological avoidance of death".

She has an untreatable neurological disease. She told me "I found out it's a consensus among different philosophers. It absolutely is. I just prefer not to think about it".

It really sucks when you join a company, you are really excited and then you see that the management and the work culture in the company sucks and you cant wait to leave...such a waste of time and energy :'(

I wonder what's the future of the crypto-mining businesses, when electricity prices have sky-rocketed to 4€/kWh [from what it used to be 14ct 2 years ago]. True story. Shops had to close

Government re-employment resume wizard: "Enter your job title for this job experience."

Me: "Development Manager"

Wizard: "Did you mean Biofuels/Biodiesel Technology and Product Development Manager,
Training and Development Manager, or
Wind Energy Development Manager?"

Me: "Web Development Manager"

Wizard: "Website Administrator it is!"

Me: ... bruh ...

i miss being intuitive, creative, free of that need for productivity and reason and purpose. i need more of that dionysian energy in my life

I have been working on this software for 3 years now. The code base was a working prototype made by my boss before I came, not more, not less. Php + Angular. Have been refactoring a lot, backend is backed with hundreds of tests now, frontend still lacks a lot. Still a lot of programm structures are still the same weird ones my boss once created in a rush between two meetings while learning Angular to get the prototype finished. Now it's used in production which makes hard to refactor, because we have to maintain backwards compatibility. Neither the parts I added or refactored completely are satisfying, because they are built on this structures, because i never got any feedback for anything I decided and because I changed my own paradigms over time.

So I am all alone on this project. All genuinly new projects are assigned to the new team members (i was the first one, no we are five plus my boss) because I wont have time, have to maintain the old one. So I never can do something new which is quite frustrating.

I did a little side tool, the only thing I invented and did completely by myself in our repertoire - and now some stakeholder shows big interest onto this. Instead of giving me the task to make a real project from this my boss wants to give it to them to develop it. Why? Because I need more time for the main application.

Also the more the software is used the more bug tickets and feature requests come. I was crying for help for months but the others had appareantly more important stuff to do.

This might be true to some extend. Yesterday we had some kind of crisis meeting and my boss wanted again to assing pur junior to help me, who has a shit load of other things to do and is a student. I insisted that this would not be enough, and one of the fulltime devs has to get involved because the thing is our core application and I am only part time btw. So my boss said we wont decide today but one of them should do it. They should have some time to figure out who which is understandable but it's not that I didn't keep saying this for months. Now they are all like whimp whimp when I have to do php i will quit. The new projects are all typescript, with node backend if any. But alas, one of them even said yesterday he doesn't want to do js anymore. Okay... but... this is our tech stack then get another job allready?

And I should do the same probably. But then again I feel very sorry for my boss who helped me in very dark times of corona and more. If both of us leave, the project he worked on for decade (including convincing poeole, collect money..) might be suddenly at it's end while he is so exited about it's access today...

I also get insecure if it's really that they hate php so much or that they don't want to work with me personally because maybe I am a bad team Player or what?

I experienced the same at my old workplace, got left alone with big parts of the project because they didn't want to do php and js in this case and it ended up five devs doing the python backend and me doing the frontend and the php cms part all alone. Then I quit and now everything seems to happen again.

And then again I think I am only fucked up so hard by this stuff because I do not really like being a developer at all. I only do it for the money and because I am good at it (at least i think so. Nobody ever bothers to ever to read my code and give me feedback, because you know, php and js). So I guess I would hate any other job in the field maybe likewise?

This job *is* convinient, salary, office
position, flexibility could not be better. At the end of the day it's not that stressfull. And i don't have any second of freetime (due to family) or energy i could offer a new and more demanding employer, can't work over time or even take a fulltime position, can't home office, can't earn less, can't travel very long to the office and especially can't go back to school to learn something completely new. Some of these constraints are softwe then other naturally but still my posibilities at the Moment are very limited. That might change in about five years if the family situation changed. So it would most likely be reasonable to stay until then at my current job? And bear being alone with this app, don't getting involved on any new project, don't learn anything new, don't invent anything.

There was one potential way out, they considered offering me PHD position to the upcoming ml part of the project... But I learned that I would attend to a bunch of classes at university first, which i would like to, but I don't think i have the time.

I feel trapped somehow. I also feel very lonely in the Office because those fucktards keep saying in home office.

Man, I don't want to go to work today.

i don't have the energy to argue against this bullshit any longer

when you're trying so hard to build a piece of crap that nobody needs, fine.

So I met this person via a social platform.

They were absolutely silly and weren't able to hold a conversation. So I, like a normal person, just stopped trying to keep things alive.

Over the years, I have realised and learnt that if a person is interested in being friends, they'd put in efforts and I alone will not have to drag things on my shoulder.

I started cutting out people right, left, and center who I felt were taking advantage of me or using me in some way or another.

I ended up saving a lot of time and energy. I no longer feel drained or anxious about something not working out. Not dragging saved me from draining.

Anyway, they reach out to me again after few weeks and I was like let's give it a try to establish a friendship, because befriending people is my weak point.

The cycle repeats. At first I thought it must be because of the asynchronous nature of the platform so I drop my Telegram Id in case they preferred an IM approach.

I swear in the name of sweet lord, the retard does the same behaviour. So, I stopped communication.

And one fine day, the person tells me that they lack social skills and want to learn how to make friends and stuff.

Very fair point. So, me being me, gave them a few tips and critically pointed out their behaviour on how they reply with a one liner after every 2 or 3 business days.

Absolutely no change in their behaviour. They kept texting me the same.

At this point, I was like why am I doing it? I could find better people easily. Because for me, communication is everything. I cannot function without a good communication between two living beings.

So, I asked them why are they even trying to learn social skills when they barely implement it and don't want to change to which they reply saying that so they can use it to befriend people and network to getter better job opportunities.

I fuck them off.

And fuck such people who have intentions, are not clear enough about it, and play people for their own selfish gains.

And this where another learning I got from @scout is have boundaries.

Why do all good people in my life leave? Damn it! I need those good people back and be friends with them and not retards who cannot even communicate beyond one liner.

probably gonna have to do with environmental software certification (optimizing for energy reduction, that sort of stuff)

One of the major things I find irritating about looking for a job as a developer is that some companies ask you to make demo projects for them (and some of those projects can take days to make..).

It annoys me I have to spend energy on something that may result in nothing. And this gets more annoying if several companies ask it. It's like I'm working for free. I don't feel productive. lol

Unit tests bad

(I have no energy to write smth funnier and more elaborate, sorry)

Worst collab was in bootcamp. Group projects always suck because there’s always someone not pulling their weight. In my case it felt like everyone was terrible. My only regret was not putting a specific person on my “don’t want to collab” list when groups were being assigned. That probably would have saved me from so much stress.

One person in my group didn’t know how to start up the project…two weeks into us working on it. She even had the privilege of having an outside mentor. Mentor didn’t know how to work the project either—but let’s be real, that’s not the mentor’s responsibility. She forgot she needed to run npm install. We were six months into this bootcamp and she forgot one of the simplest commands.

Another person was just a follower and couldn’t think for himself. He was so faithful to another teammate’s choices and direction that I wondered if they were screwing each other. Other teammate could be absolutely (and destructively) wrong and he would defend her as “well she’s taking initiative and showing leadership.” It wasn’t leadership, it was bullying. They weren’t dating/screwing, but I did suspect he liked to be controlled/dominated by “strong”women.

The “strong” woman teammate is someone I suspect of being the spawn of Satan. You were only useful to her if you agreed with her or could help her. If you gave her any sort of pushback, she’d turn on you. I think she wanted me to be both her parent and her scapegoat for the sketchy things she wanted to do. She pulled a lot of bullshit and tried to blame everything on me. Seriously, she would invest a lot of time in stupid things like getting me to agree to use bitmoji for team pics; I just wanted to check with the bootcamp first because they might have an unwritten rule about using your real face for presentations so guests know who you are. I had to get the bootcamp staff to support me because she was out of control. She tried to say that I was sabotaging the group from day one. The staff explained to her how her story of me “sabotaging” the group doesn’t add up. She backed down a little but she’d still try to screw me over through the remainder of the project.

There was one dude who was alright. He was the keep your head down type. Spawn of Satan would be on his ass about being late to class and he’d just stare at her stoically. He was a husband and a dad so he was choosing how to expend his energy. I don’t like people being late either, but show some compassion and don’t snap at people.

If I saw these people again, I would not even pretend to be friends with most of them. Spawn of Satan especially: I’d take out my crucifix and send her back to hell.

For a unit amount of staying awake I lose less energy now than I did an hour ago.

I just said that.
To an actual human being.
Science is dangerous.

What do you guys do on low work days? both in terms of
a) Low energy = low work production
b) Low work required of you/slow work day

The default USB voltage hould have been specified to 6 instead of 5 volts.

Six (6) volts would allow for longer cables than five (5) volts do, since the spare voltage compensates for the resistance of cables. This is even more crucial for USB hubs. USB hubs are highly dependable upon these days due to laptop vendors dropping the number of USB ports down to two or even one. I am looking at you, Medion.

If several devices are connected to a USB hub, the voltage can quickly drop below 4.5 volts due to the resistance between the USB hub ports and the computer's USB port, causing some devices to restart themselves even if the computer's USB port is not over capacity. If it were over capacity, it would just regulate down its output voltage to prevent overcurrent.

Lithium-ion batteries need at least 4.3 volts arriving at the battery terminals to fully charge, and mobile devices are typically not equipped with a boost converter. Even if they were, they are rather inefficient, meaning they would produce significant heat and waste a power bank's energy. Other USB devices such as flash drives and peripherals might power off below 4.5 volts. However, 6 volts have solid 1.7 volts of margin to 4.3 volts, more than twice the margin of 0.7 volts that 5 volts have. On the way from the power supply to the end device, the voltage has to pass several barriers which weaken it, including the cable, connector endings, and the end device's internals such as the charging controller.

Sure, there are quick charging standards such as by Qualcomm and MediaTek which support elevating voltages to nine (9), twelve (12), and even twenty (20) volts. However, they require support by both the charger and mobile device. If six (6) volts were the default USB voltage, all devices would have been designed to accept this voltage, and longer cables could have been used anywhere. Obviously, all USB devices should be able to run on five volts as well.

Six volts would have been more stable, flexible, and reliable.

They say “think outside the box”. When you're depressed, the box is made of concrete. The more depressed you are, the smaller the box.

Our brain is wired to cut off thought processes that take too much energy. In depression, this mechanism works against you, cutting off everything but laying down. To me, get up in the morning and go brush my teeth is too outside the box. Thinking about it is like touching a boiling kettle. Painful, ouch-y, and my brain doesn't even want me to think about doing it.

I'm working and living in my bed. I don't really get up. Should I even say about things like going out or cooking?

I wake up with so much interest and enthusiasm for programming and tech. It all goes away when I start work at 9 AM. Everyday at 5 PM, I question my career choices. I don't have the interest from the beginning of the day nor the energy to do anything.

!dev

1. It's one of those few times in life that listening to Lq's Numb doesn't make me feel less anxious. Or Somewhere I Belong. Either way, anxiety levels are on all time high.

2. I have completely lost appetite. Usually at this point in time I'd go to doctor and ask for Xanax or something similar, to chill for a few days. But covid. I ain't going to any clinic, plus, ain't nobody got time for that.

3. On top of everything, I am also PMSing. The lack of energy, times n. (n>10)

4. Struggling to get out of bed for hours is now a reality.

5. I'm glad ("glad" is exaggeration tho) this will pass in a few weeks. I am hanging on to that hope and experience tells me it will pass. But my feelings are like "nah, we doomed. Let's just run away. Or just sleep until it all passes or we die of starvation."

6. My brain must work for the next few days. If I have to push it by drowning it in sugar, I will. But I'm also obese rn. Well, I guess it's "Hello diabetes!".

7. My hands and feet are cold. Like, freezing cold. Meanwhile, the rest of me is sweating. This sucks. Ngl.

8. I feel like I'm fighting a losing battle. Like, those last stabby stabs moments in a battle where you know you're gonna fall down soon. I know this feeling of doom and gloom is PMS related, but it's there. I have no solution for that aside from nicotine and sugar.

9. I can't even cry. Which is sad.
... Do you see what's happening there? That's the loop I'm in.

The amount of energy spent to just write ‘Hi’ and click a send button is so big that we should consider banning of sending hi messages.

Instead of just saying “Hi!” we are now using analog to digital preprocessors that convert it to bunch of 0 and 1 to send it over communication layer and deliver it to other human being that will convert it from digital to analog by reading it but that is simple.

By sending message using phone we also:
- save it to local phone
- convert it to couple protocols
- transmit it over air so make connection to internet provider services that would generate logs on this provider as well as whole routing table before it gets to the target person
- save it on messaging provider disk
- probably be processed by filters by provider, sometimes be reviewed or listened by third parties and also processed in bulk by artificial intelligence algorithms
- finally delivered to target phone and saved there where that person would just change this text to their inner voice and save it
- sometimes encrypted and decrypted
- sometimes saved on provider
- sometimes saved on phone manufacturer cloud backup
- don’t get me started on people involved to keep this infrastructure in place for you just to say hi

There are also some indirect infinite possibilities of actions for example:
- emit sound and light that can lead to walking from one room to other
- the floor in your house is destroyed cause of it so you need to renovate your floor
- sound can expose your position and kill you if you’re hiding from attacker
- sound can wake you up so you wake up in different hours
- it can stop you from having sex or even lead to divorce as a result simple hi can destroy your life
- can get you fired
- can prevent from suicide and as a result you can make technology to destroy humans

and I can write about sound and light all day but that’s not the point, the point is that every invention makes life more complicated, maybe it saves time but does it really matter ?

I can say that every invention we made didn’t make world simpler. The world is growing with complexity instead.

It’s just because most of those inventions lead to computer that didn’t make our world simpler but made it more complicated.

Anything i try in this life, it fails. I have done hundreds, and have 0 successful projects. When someone asks me "what have you done in these 1/4th of a century existing on this useless floating space rock?" ...... I have nothing to say. It would appear as if I've done Nothing. I have nothing to showcase of projects because its not running live on production. It's all on private repositories. The more i try the harder i fail. I am energy drained. I am uninspired. I am unmotivated. Seeing how some 19 year old NOBODY kid just comes out of nowhere, makes NFT project, scams people for millions of dollars and haves fun in his life and doesnt have to work anymore, is fueling me with RAGE. This is starting to become madness. Am i having too high goals and ambitions and that's why i percieve myself as if im unsuccessful? But how is that possible if a 19 year old nobody is capable of becoming a multi millionaire by scamming people in web3? If i lower my goal expectations, then I have no reason to live. I wouldnt care if i die tomorrow or continue living. I wouldnt bother looking left right while crossing the road because I Do Not Care. What must i do to succeed just Once and meet my goals and expectations? I dont understand. I hate life. Life is empty and meaningless. I have became a Nihilist and i believe in that religion more than anything. It makes no sense that someone scams millions by doing jack shit at a young age while someone struggles and tries hard his whole life and still isnt successful even 0.01% of what the 19 year old is. IT. IS. NOT. FAIR.

I'm very consumed by the world affairs, events, politics, and news. It consumes a big part of my thoughts and mental energy. I really want to stop following and getting consumed by all of this. But, I also want to at least have an idea about what's happening. I truly believe that one should not be neutral and should do their due diligence to find and support the right cause and take a stance (even if by words). It's a difficult balance to achieve.

I don't wanna work 😭. My company is making me work like a donkey. I have to commute for a total of 4 hours (to and fro). I get hella tired when i reach home. I don't have any energy or life. I feel lifeless and everything makes me irritated. They are paying me $5300 in a year( i am from india) with a bond. It just seems like they are exploiting me. 😭 I can concentrate on preparing for DSA and make projects in order to switch my job. I just can't keep working, working and working at the same place with the same people inside the same cubicle. I feel so fucking irritated, lifeless and sleep deprived. They are recruiting freshers and paying more salary to them who doesn't even know how to code! And here i have been working straight for 1 year(including internship) with very good feedbacks from everyone. When i asked if i could get wfh permanently, manager said no but at the same time gave permanent wfh to the other team member having much greater experience. I feel so so sad. I finish all my work on time no matter where i am and always gets good feedback. 😭

Why comment on the same thing during code review??

I submitted a PR and had to make a design choice that propagated throughout the module i was working on.

During code review, my coworker commented on every...single...line that this change effected asking "why are we doing x here?" instead of just creating ONE SINGLE THREAD with this question for discussion. There were at least 10 review comments on github from their one review that said "why X?"

Is this normal? Ive only had a few programming jobs and this is the first time this has happened to me.

personally, when someone makes a choice like that, i just make a comment and save the rest of the review until that is addressed.

If you’re struggling with productivity:
[1] Wake up early & Exercise
Waking up early means getting most of the work done as soon as you start your day. This sets a routine for you.
Doing a high-intensity workout early in the morning can kill laziness and make you feel productive.
[2] Divide the day into three parts
Do the most work in the morning hours i.e 6 am to 11 am.
Keep the 12 pm - 3 pm for work that requires less energy. Evenings can be utilised to finish minor tasks.
[3] Make a timetable
A proper timetable or To-Do is a good way to keep a track of your daily routine.
Tick off the work you've completed and you'll feel you've been productive.
[4] Follow people who motivate you to work
If you waste time scrolling on social media, make sure to follow people who instantly motivate you to work and take action.
[5] Update or shift workspace
Your workspace is where you spend most of your time, so make sure it makes you feel motivated to work.
In case you are bored of your workspace, shift it to a new room, preferably that has windows for fresh air.

I have an idea. Since to statistics of Porn watchers are increasing. Why not we create a sex toy that generates energy when user masturbate with it?

Renewable energy.

Steam winter sale cometh ❄️🖥️🎮
Me who wantst to gameth but hath no energy: 😔🤡

Depression is not a passive sorrow and lack of energy. My depression, being bipolar type I, is active, furious, burning pain within. My heart is pounding, and it hurts. The strong, blunt guilt for nothing I did in particular, and then the anxiety that is all around and over my view, reminiscent of how mould grows on a slice of bread.

It never stops.

AI is this huge scam to me. People keep saying it will take over everything and replace everything: jobs, people, etc. It is so over hyped by people who don't understand how it actually works.

I will wonder if AI can take over everything when they can build an AI that can weed a garden.

- no chemicals, too much is used and poisons everything.
- the garden cannot be specifically designed to be weed by machine.
- the AI must differentiate between weeds and non-weeds.
- the robotic system employed must not destroy everything else while weeding.
- the AI should know when it finds random objects like gloves, or shorts, cigarettes, or electrical components that they need attention or actually pick them up. Yes, I have found these.
- it should be quick and energy efficient and not require an entire nuclear plant to run the AI. What is the point of AI powered by a server somewhere if it pollutes from afar rather than local.

I just don't see this happening in my lifetime.

I've recently done 2 interviews in the past 2 weeks, I did 3 stages for the first one and failed the last stage. I felt devastated. I did the 2nd one Which had written and oral, I feel like I failed oral,results are yet to come out. I have 2 interviews next week and I have no energy to prepare. I feel lost and tired of preparation.

I am kinda feel broken these days :( Not even have energy to do anything... I have experience of 6 years but feeling like nothing gonna happen. Learning any tech will be waste of time.. Just wants to run away from my life and spent some time to travel but then who is gonna take care of my bills :(

Fuck this coding shit.. I am feeling like fresher again :( except this time I can't compromise with my salary . I wish me luck for upcoming year 2023

So the tests for the AMD RX 7000 GPUs are out. Business as usual: superb for non-RT gaming given the price, crap at everything else - including energy efficiency in FPS/W.

Pro tip to the AMD marketing: you don't highlight features like energy where you suck relative to the competition. You point out your strong points. Admittedly, you don't have much to work with here.

January is always the month of feedback and reflection. I dont mind going to the office x times a week and standing still on the highway every day. But if they are asking me to spend my own time on a course now they can lick my balls. Im already working for two years without a raise. Ik not continuing like this. I understand everyone needs to improve but if im exhausted at the end of the day by all the buzz in the office i dont have energy left for additional schooling. Im learning on the job. Deal with it

If you really think about it, our body spends energy to keep us alive, so we can spend even more energy.

Energy dissipates. Thermodynamics works. Your life is a chemical reaction.

Oh my... I'm so exhausted and tired of everything. First I got really sick for two weeks and couldn't work. I also collapsed on the floor one night and hurt myself. Well what happens yesterday? You guessed it - I fell down the stairs and hurt exactly the same spots as two weeks ago... (no I was not drunk).

And then I have to work on a holiday today (yes, still with that same fucking shitty shopware project) because I have to attend an appointment in a different country on Thursday (I need Thursday off, but I don't have any vacation left).

So here I'm sitting almost crying in pain because of this FUCKING project, everything hurts, I still can't think straight and shopware is denying my refresh tokens. FUCK THIS JOB. Seriously. Fuck it. I have had the chance to look into a lot of companies and do different things, but this is the worst.

Nobody fucking cared about the project for nearly 8 months, and now that I'm close to leaving the company they begin to act like "oh well it must be done by then". ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! I told them a million times I need help and that I won't be able to finish it in time. That's what happens when nobody plans a project, but accepts it anyways because "it brings in money".

Seriously?! This project has been a waste of money and my energy and nerves. We're already 100% over the budget and will never ever see one cent coming from this shitty project. WHY FOR FUCKS SAKE IS IT THAT THOSE PEOPLE JUST DONT SEE IT WHEN A PROJECT IS GOING DOWN THE FUCKING DRAIN?!

advantages of bionic systems:
- energy efficiency
- flexibility
- low friction
- compact size
- water resistance

advantages of mechanical systems:
- precision
- rotation is available
- scalability
- can change parts

Woohoo who else has to work the weekend because of bullshit bugs?

Please let me have the energy to deal with my coworkers on Monday

I should never have accepted this project. Having to work on a different time zone (remotely) and it's really messing with me because I have small kids at home. Kids wear me out before the evening is done. I can't participate in a remote call in peace. I should also be available for the team and especially QA because if they test my work and I'm not there, I am blocking them. This sucks.. Maybe I'll request to be transferred off this project because of personal reasons. Maybe I just need to fix other stuff like my sleep schedule, or eating habits, start exercising more to gain energy.. Idk.

#Breakup #GettingOverEx
So my ex broke up with me/ we decided to "go on a break" three months back. It didn't help that my ex is part of my close friend group and I'm obliged to run into them every other weekend.
None of my close friend group knows what transpired/that we dated.
They started dating someone new as soon as we went on a break.

As a part of new year, I decided to mentally move on. Now my ex is trying to reinsert themselves in my life (unsure in what capacity- as a friend/reltnshp).Today, I woke up dreaming about my ex and their new flame and feeling pretty disturbed. I don't know their status quo either as I haven't talked to my ex about it. (Just know it as friend group mentions them here and there)

I had initiated communication with my ex as I needed an advise (on phone) and they kind of self invited themselves to my place on weekend. How to cope with all this mess. I am unable to focus on my work because of this and my productivity is shot.

I just want to move on and date someone who makes me happy/is worth my energy.

How do y'all process breakups/get over ex?

We never die, our atoms just change state. We are still apart of the universe, it’s just that we’re dust rather than humans.

The universe is a ball of finite energy being recycled. You are apart of that energy.

When I die, sprinkle my ashes at the root of a tree so that I may become one with vegetation.

Just when you are about to quit
notification bell goes "Ntiiingggg...."
check messages...
message from the bank....

Client just dumped $$$ in there
...... shiiit
drink more energy drink
more coffee.....
more sleepless nights

Sometimes, using git feels like performing a particle experiment in physics.

When I have some added lines staged for a commit, then remove those lines and stage it too, the changes annihilate into no changes at all.

Lines add and lines remove is like particle and antiparticle.
The energy that is released upon annihilation is equivalent to the joy of having a clean commit with few changes.

If you want to be strictly vegetarian, e.g. only eating plant-based food, and you have a nervous system (e.g. you're not a vegetable), then that's not possible. You need B12.

B12 is complex, and it can't be found in plants — lifeforms that obey laws of evolution don't just spend energy to create a complex substance they don't need. Plants don't have a nervous system, hence no need for B12.

In animal kingdom, there are no animals that are only eating plants. Not a single one of them. Herbivores eat their feces regularly, as B12 is there, but it's synthesized in our bodies at the point when there is no chance that it can be consumed.

Deer eat lemmings on a regular basis. Among herbivores, this is not uncommon.

If you want to be strictly vegetarian, and you don't want to eat B12 from supplements (because it's derived not from plants as you probably guessed), you can make it happen with certain kinds of fermented food, where B12 is synthesized by specific bacteria.

Since I quit binge-eating sugary stuff, my body became capable of feeling true hunger. Not in my stomach, as that kind of feeling in my body is probably fucked up forever, but in my head.

When I feel hungry, it’s probably too late. This is exactly what I feel:
- dizziness
- FOV slightly decreases
- tunnel vision, things in peripheral vision become blurry and obscure. I “see” them, but my brain doesn’t process them quite as good
- colors become less saturated
- it’s very difficult to combine and analyse multiple concepts to derive a conclusion, basically the thing I do at work that wins me bread
- thought process becomes “single-threaded”. I can follow just one thought at a time and cannot go deeper than 3-4 levels, my brain just drops it by making the whole thought feel like some kind of slimy clay that cannot be comprehended, let alone expressed with words
- difficult to express thoughts with language, I have hard time talking, especially explaining
- want to sleep, but can’t, as brain is frantically trying to stay awake

It’s probably the mechanism developed evolutionary. That single thread remains active at all costs to allow me to find food, and brain doesn’t let me sleep, as it thinks if I fall asleep I’ll die. It’s amusing to see my brain actively killing thoughts that are not “important”, I feel like a real-time OS or an Erlang application. Perhaps thinking is really a very costly process in terms of how much energy it takes.

When I finally eat something, especially if it’s a proper meal, I feel a very pleasant sensation, probably it’s my brain telling me “thank you”, releasing dopamine to actively reinforce that “finding food is a very very good thing and it’s very important”. FOV pops back into place, peripheral vision becomes clean and sharp, thoughts awaken, eager to occupy all the treads that became available.

!dev

Why must I always be the guy that has to connect with people?

So I'm applying to a retail job, and the section manager, lets call him Tim, is kinda low energy.

Come in four days later after the first meeting, to just let him know I put in the application. We're talking, talking some more, and he basically wants to hire me but says it usually takes 1-2 weeks for the background. Well that's nonsense for a retail position doing stocking, but alright.

And I'm heading out the door, say to him "dont kill yourself on shift", he doesnt even laugh, just flat affect, monotone, "I know I still got an hour and a half on shift."

And as I'm driving away I'm thinking, that's how the entire conversation was like.

It wasn't just misery or tiredness. The dude, Tim, I'd seen that face and heard that tone before.

Its the behavior of someone who actively doesnt want to be alive.

And as I'm driving away, I'm just thinking, how do I go back? How do I go to this total stranger, who I'm also applying for a job with, who I just met, and say *look, I dont mean to get personal and this is probably uninvited but I know something's up with you. You were like this last time I met you, and you're like it even more now. I know bro. I know. You think no one sees you're going through something, but I do.*

I see shit like this and it's so obvious and by the time I realize I should say something, the opportunity has passed, the moment has passed. And it's like, is it even my place?

But to see someone like that, to be familiar with that look on their face, and to let them walk away...

I just dont know.

The cost of energy in the EU combined with 10% inflation (but not salary increase) has become crushing to the point offices and households shut off heating and use battery lamps and candles for light. Avg. Year total for energy is over 9000€ in Belgium! At this rate we will burn through our savings for basic utilities

!tech
( sorry to those who have to bear with my non tech posts that i put too often. my tech/work life has been fine so far, its my personal life that is fucked up and venting it anonymously gives me some peace/solutions)

I sometimes feel that being brought up in a loveless home where i have only seen parents fighting and throwing abuses/stuff at each other, i haven't got the knowledge about how to raise a loving family.

The only goal we seem to have is to fight out our misery-filled, middle class life, and keep running for getting wealth.
Le my parents:
- Go outside in evenings/weekends? nah why bother, we don't wanna see each others' faces
- Spend time/ share room together? nah why bother, we don't wanna see each others' faces
- Family trip? nah why bother, we don't wanna see each others' faces . We can take our trips separately with our our religious/work friends
- visit relatives? nah why bother, relatives are bad.

I am not blessed with a lot of relationships, so i like to compare each of the bonds i got. I am playing the role of a son/single child and friends of some dudes. I am currently not playing the role of a lover, so i don't know about it, but my relationship with my friends is more exciting than mine with my family.

Those guys just wanna do everything together if it had been in there hands. 3 out of our 5 guy gang has joined the same group, 2 of them live on the same rented floor , and 2 of them work in same office. They want to keep their 24 hrs as a chill gang hanging together, but we somehow have restricted our group hangouts to weekends.
Even then , whenever we meet, its like we won't go back till 2 am. useless banter, cussing, daring stuff , etc. life is exciting with my boys .

I feel this kind of energy is something i would want in any of my relationship. but i have no idea how people create this magic in groups of 2. i am usually the most boring person to talk to, when i am alone. because i simply don't know how 2 people who vow to spend their lives together can keep each other happy, interested and content

I feel this is such a disastrous thing in my life that i won't be able to sustain any relationship/family even if i somehow get one :/

To what order of magnitude would be sufficient to step time based functions for physics applications ? Since direct solutions off multivariant co dependent problems usually cant be found until you update things like position velocity and or energy over a very short tike period first. Example being gravitation or electrostatics

Like nano seconds ?

I just realized being alive in this life is actually a punishment. Who enjoys this life if they are not rich? Wtf.

I have to spend thousands of dollars for my dogs treatment because hes sick. Those greedy vets are fucking disgusting. I dont have energy to talk about how money hungry they are and not actually helping.

Literally giving away my last dollars to help my dog. These doctors don't give a Fuck if hes gonna survive they are here just to milk as much money as they can from me. Im fuckijg sick of this life and world. I didnt sign up for this struggle.