Article 13 memes

Just saw this Imgur, sorry if it's already been posted here!

Thank you GDPR, even though I am not an EU citizen, now I know what services have I provided my e-mail address.

European Union WhatsApp Group

Hope this isn't a repost

No presents for the EU this year

When your pc assigns you a Side Quest—I shall not fail you.

Thanks EU.

Fuck the EU. Fucking puppets. I'm literally going to go and create my own fucking country, i swear to fucking god.

Linux <3

My condolences, Europe.

F

ignorant bitches

Mpre article 13

Watching a tutorial.

* Uses the mouse in order to select and format code, instead of the shortcuts VS code provides

* Does multiple "bool == true"-comparisons

* Doesn't use string interpolation and makes unnecessary .toString() calls

* Adds fucking parentheses around the whole fucking expression he wants to assign
value = (expression)

* Explanations so vague, the EU wants to hire him to reform the internet

Fucking waste of time even on x2.25 speed.

Today is finally the day of my hackathon, have been working with my team for about a month on a personal assistant already. I think we may stand a chance to get in the finals this year, unlike last year, when we started working only on the day of the hackathon.

Hai devs!
Team devRant here.

Some sad news, my teammate can't participate for reasons I don't need to disclose.
I'm not stopping though, I'm going in alone! (Or well, physically).

I'll post the link to the updates (and more) site later on but the important part:

It starts at 12pm EU/Amsterdam time and stops tomorrow at that same time!

Working on a livestream =)

Cheers!

Github

Fuck. My new job in the public sector requires me to sign paper applications to access JIRA or git. It takes them 4 days to process, so now I am waiting at home doing nothing. I’ll still get paid a competitive developer salary, though.

If you are a EU citizen from a country that subsidizes Poland, you can be sure that your taxes are well spent on my couch :)

I'mma just leave this here. Time to download all the memes while I can.

This is how you combat the EU law.
You are welcome 😉

Just read that EU may planning regulating Algorithms...

What the fuck? WHAT THE FUCK?

They want that programmers make their Algorithms public accessible for transparency and say what algorithms are allowed to do, because people are scared of them?!

MY BRAIN HURTS AFTER THAT FUCKING GENERAL DATA PROTECTION BULLSHIT THEY WANT TO REGULATE HOW OUR PROGRAMS SHOULD WORK?!

AHDHSHSJSDHJABDJS SHDNSBDBSNSN *RAGEQUIT*

I'm not from EU or anything but you guys from the EU should thank the government for increasing the prices of your phones 👌.

What the flying fuck is happening on the EU with the fucking GDPR corsairs!!

I made two - TWO - entirely static websites, hand-made, 100% cookie-free!! I didn't even need to store a goddam boolean cookie! No third-party content is EVER invoked, called or summoned! I hosted a small video to avoid Youtube! Facebook and twitter share buttons are links!! I DID ALL OF THIS ON PURPOSE AND INFORMED THE FUCKING CLIENT.

And THEN (and, of course, unsolicited), the fucking lawyers of an asshole GDPR corsair office came and scared the shit out of my clients and convinced BOTH of them to put the goddam GDPR cookie consent popup on the fucking websites!! And they took their bribe, of course...

In order to avoid billionaire fines because of the NON EXISTENT cookies of the SMALLEST, SIMPLEST, 2KB MINIFIED HTML page on the Internet.

Anybody else is suffering from this kind of behavior??

*** IN THE FUTURE ***

@elon musk colonize mars and starts sending people to mars and keep EARTH for EU CITIZENS because mars isnt GDPR compliant

FUCK YOU EU! WHAT IN OUR LORDS NAME MADE YOUR RETARDED, SHIT INFESTED BRAINS THROW UP THAT BURNING PILE OF CRAP ARTICLE 13!?
EU "LAW"MAKERS, GO TO FUCKING HELL FOR TRYING TO CENSOR THE INTERNET, WHERE SATAN WILL FUCK YOUR ASS WITH HIV INFECTED CACTI!

Is @trogus and @dfox ever coming to an EU event? Would really like to meet you guys 🙂

Big day today for the UK. I hope we stay, the future's bleak if we don't. I'm IN. Damn those outers.

So much rant against the GDPR. In the meanwhile USA Today created a site just for the EU. No Tracking or Ads. A site which was normally 5mb big to load is now 500kb for the EU! Awesome! Thats what the internet could be!

function brexit(){
drop(EU);
drop(Chancellor.Cameron);
drop(stocks);
}

GDPR: great law, except for those who use technology (JS blockers, tracking protection, etc etc) to fight other technology (cookies, trackers, etc etc). Welcomed by the general public, but for content publishers it is a royal pain in the ass. Because did the EU provide non-legalese explanations as to how to become compliant? Of course they didn't. Why would they? But of course lawyers jumped on it like it's the best thing in the world. "GDPR-experts".

Now, article 11 and 13 again. Copyright law taken to ridiculous levels, impossible to implement, except for maybe Google, Microsoft and Facebook. Anyone else? Of course not. Again, a lot of money has to be involved with it. Does anyone want this thing? Of course not. And why the fuck is this still a thing even?! Did direct lobbying to the EU Parliament members a few months ago not teach them anything?! Senile pieces of shit. Should those old fucks really be able to decide about the future of the internet?

[This rant was automatically removed due to copyright violation]

Leaving the EU is like firing your QA team.

It feels good for a bit...

A bug is never just a mistake. It represents something bigger. An error of thinking. That makes you who you are.
-ElliotAlderson:

FINALLY! The European Comission is thinking of getting rid of daylight saving! I am so looking forward to this.

A formatted EU and a nerd troll

This is not an interview test just an awkward experience in general regarding interview.

This happened two years ago when I was a fresh university graduate looking for a job in UK as an immigrant (Im EU national).

Went to an interview for a web dev+tech support position. Two fat guys with tshirts met me and started interviewing me for a sysadmin position. Started asking me about disaster recovery and stuff.

Turns out recruiter messed up not only companies but positions as well. Also these two guys didnt bother to check anything.

I pulled out the job ad for which I applied originally, interviewers had a look at it and still proceeded questioning me while knowing that I prepared for completely different position interview.

Needless to say, it went terrible and I didnt get the job. I dont know if its just me or Im unlucky, but I had a lot of encounters in UK with so many incompetent recruiters.

So... GDPR.
And the deadline.
And I have no idea what to do.

What does it mean for one-man indie projects? Data protection officers? Companies? Controllers? Processors? EU employees? Argh.

Look, please, EU. Not everyone can afford to hire an entire team for this, when their current team is literally one person.

Yes, the GDPR is probably a step in the right direction, but I think I'll just stop collecting the data altogether.

(All data I collect is just user settings stored in a database, nothing more.)

Can someone point me in the right direction?

China tried to censor the internet and they failed.
EU approves article 11 & 13 and everything is now blockee in EU.

China should learn from EU parliament on how to censor the internet without the need of any firewall

"Condor, your new Samsung Galaxy S8+ doesn't have the latest Google apps"

You know what Google? I don't give a shit about your latest apps. Often times I go out of my way to root the device and remove your mandatory bloatware, that YOU fucking Google enforce OEM's to preinstall. Fortunately BlueStacks doesn't have them preinstalled, which saves me the pain of uninstalling them. Given that, you've got quite the balls to spam me with this shit Google.

By the way, another thing.. this preinstall shit is linked to the EU antitrust rulings, isn't it? And spam is linked to GDPR, and honestly I don't recall ever opting in to this kind of wanketeering mail. In fact, I usually go out of my way to opt out of this kind of corporate wankery. Time for another huge fine perhaps?

First rant: but I'm so triggered and everyone needs a break from all the EU and PC rants.

It's time to defend JavaScript. That's right, the best frikin language in the universe.

Features:
incredible async code (await/async)
universal support on almost everything connected to the internet
runs on almost all platforms including natively
dynamically interpreted but also internally compiled (like Perl)
gave birth to JSON (you're welcome ppl who remember that the X in AJAX stood for XML)

All these people ranting about JS don't understand that JS isn't frikin magic. It does what it needs to do well.

If you're using it for compute-heavy machine learning, or to maintain a 100k LOC project without Typescript, then why'd you shoot yourself in the foot?

As a proud JS developer I gotta scroll through all these posts gushing over the other languages. Why does nobody rant about using Python for bitcoin mining or Erlang to create a media player?

Cuz if you use the wrong tool for the right job, it's of course gonna blow up in your face.

For example, there was a post claiming JS developers were "scared" of multithreading and only stick in their comfort zone. Like WTF when NodeJS came out everything was multithreaded. It took some brave developers to step out of the comfort zone to embrace the event loop.

For a web app, things like PHP and Node should only be doing light transforms between the database information and HTML anyways. You get one thread to handle the server because you're keeping other threads open to interface with databases and the filesystem. The Nexus.js dev ranting on all us JS devs and doesn't realize that nobody's actual web server is CPU bound because of writing HTML bodies, thats why we only use 1 thread. We use other worker threads to do the heavy lifting (yes there is a C++ bridge look it up)

Anyways TL;DR plz respect JS developers we're people too. ES7 is magic and please don't shit on ES3 or we'll start shitting on the Python 2-3 conversion (need to maintain an outdated binary just cuz people leave out ()'s in their print statements)

Or at least agree that VB.NET is an abomination and insult to the beauty that is TI-84 BASIC

EU should have their own private internet and ban the entire internet.

I love this database primarily because it is cross platform and can be easily understood by anyone unlike SQL database files.

So today I realized that Im not happy.

When I was a kid I wanted to do many things because I had time and energy but I had no money. Now that Im an adult and I have the money, I have no energy and no will power to try and have personal life in these few hours left of my day. I spend 9 hours at work everyday and totally 1hr 30min is wasted on commuting.

I spent 4 years in uni between lectures and working on my side projects, and I really believed that after uni I will get a job and my life work balance will improve.

After uni I spent 2 years working abroad in 3 jobs at 3 countries. I work as android dev and now Im making a really decent salary.

However Im not happy at all. I realized that life is not about the money. Im changing countries like socks and dont even feel the need to socialize or enjoy my life anymore. Im european and these other eu countries are not that different at all. It came to a point where relationships are meaningless to me. I became an office drone who cares only about work and outside of work I care only about my projects and more work.

At this point im only 25 years old with around 2 years of experience and money is really good, but fuck it Im so tired of being an emigrant and having no stability in life. Im so drained. I spent past 6 years (4 in uni combined with side projects and 2 years working in 3 jobs in different countriee) working my ass off and lying to myself that after the next big thing Im gonna take a break and enjoy life. But its never enough. I dont want to hit 30s or 40s and realize that I wasted my life on pursuing money and didnt get to enjoy life..

Im really considering taking a 6-12 months vacation. I need to find myself. Probably going back to my own country. Just learn how to enjoy life, attend workshops, get to know new city area, meet new people, do some interesting hobbies. Maybe do a little freelance (max 10hrs a week).

Im tired of feeling like I need to make as much money as I can and learn as much about my work as I can. Its not rewarding because its never enough.

Whats the point in that money if I cant enjoy it?

How are these EU-Upload Filters even practical for anyone except google? This seems like the most unrealistic specification by non-tech bosses in history to me 😭 What do these people expect the upload filters should compare the uploads to? How the fuck should, say a blog website, ensure that none of the uploads are copyright inflicting? Are quotes copyright inflicting? Or only when I copy paste an entire book and write my name under that? How will that get detected? Do we have a database with all the copyrighted works somewhere, that every company has access to? This shit can basically only work for companies like google which have enough data to implement such filters and thats why they already had an upload filter on youtube anyways. This entire amendment is so fucking ridiculous that it basically has to fail, no doubt. In a few months still nobody is going to have upload filters, watch...

So this is a rant about my country and especially my city: Berlin (Germany).
Germany is like a third world country when it comes to IT infrastructure. We have one of the slowest internet speeds in the whole EU. People are still afraid to pay with their card or phone. My people love their coins. While most of the other countries see the importance of the new technologies we still use mainly copper wire for internet. So why am I especially mad about Berlin? Google was planning to bring an innovation campus to our city. They wanted to establish a place for startups and technology. But the people from Berlin demonstrated against it extremely. They didn't want to have a company like Google in their city. I also am not a big fan of Google, but this would be such an important step to a better future for Germany. In a few years Germany will have a huge problem because we are so far behind the other countries. And it is so sad to see that seemingly no one cares about this.

This rant was brought to you by the worst internet in the whole EU

After article 13,

Stackoverflow be like:
[this answer can’t be displayed because of copyright infringement]

Thanks EU

Yeet I just made a brainfuck compiler with python

Everytime the government gets involved with internet, restrictions get applied.

Everytime restrictions get applied everyone loses their shit, screaming revolution.

And then...

Nothing.

(Ajit who?)

He's making a list 🌲

He's checking it twice 🎅

He's gonna find out who's naughty or nice 🎁

Santa Claus is in contravention of article 4 of the General Data Protection Regulation (EU) 2016/679

Waiting for EU great firewall.

So, a few months ago, I was in a coffee shop doing some work, black hoody on, hood up, headphones in.

When the 2 people in the booth next to me we’re talking really loudly and excited about something. I muted the music but kept the headphones in to listen in on what they were chatting about. Because I couldn’t focus on what I was doing as they were being overly loud.

They’d come to have a discussion about this great new startup business they want to do. They had charts and designs for some shitty product, but we’re being really loud and excited like a 3 year old in a candy store.

I was getting quite frustrated by their overly elaborate discussion as it was meant to be a place to focus. I could see other customers getting annoyed. This is when I heard the best thing, the name of their startup....

Quick check on Nominet, no one owns the domain!!! They were literally in the process of setting up, they’d had logos done, website design, but didn’t buy the domains!

Me being me, and thought ‘this’ll teach em’, I quickly went to 123-reg and purchased the .co.uk, .com and .eu of their business :)

Cost me £20, but serves them right!

Sorry. Not sorry!

2 years ago: Britain is leavin the EU... in what universe does this make any sense!!??

Present day: Fuck these pretentious lawmaking wankers who hate my freedom... I think I want out.

Man i really wanna have a trip to india but they make you fill out so fuckin many papers to leave the eu that im just too lazy ._.

If living and working in the UK wasn't hard enough as is for a student. This now happens and has, pretty much, screwed everything over.
Promoted lies, PM stepping down, value of pound dropping.
All going great! ☺️🔫

Conclusion for this week:
Arrrgggh I worked so fucking long...

Thanks EU, FUCK ARTICLE 13,
FUCK EU, FUCK POLITICIANS, FUCK ALL!

PYTHON WHY THE FUCK, WHAT THE FUCK, HOW AND WHY?!??
FUCKFUCKFUCK

Have I missed something?

Wow! Google's update in its privacy policy is impressive. Still too lazy to read it though. I trust Google. LOL

I think I have to leave the EU.
This is the straw to break the camel's back finally.

I am very disappointed, EU parliament.

Maybe Swiss, or Norway... or the moon, hmm...

I was depressed doing a course I hated.

3 years in and I switched to Computer Science.

Best decision ever!

So... Intense pillowtalk with the wife the other night regarding the coming enforcement of the new General Data Protection Regulation (GDPR) law in the EU after a while turns into nerdy dirty talk.

Me: *Whisper in a sleazy voice like the dirty malware that I am*: So... Why don't you just open up all your inbound firewall ports for me...
Her: Hell no... But I might just make an exception in the private domain just for you...

!activism

Guys, what should we do about Article 13 ?

The bill passed, well, that's unfortunate. We can still scream as loud as we can that it's a very bad idea, but let's face it, it won't probably work...

Personally, I'm sick of this shit. Every year they try to "regulate" the web with a new fucked-up legislation that they actually don't understand. I don't blame them for not knowing any better, but I blame them not to surround themselves with actually competent people (and no, lobbies are NOT competent, only interested).

So there it is : I want to act on this one. With traditional, ineffective methods (petitions, mails...), but I want to get further this time.

Here are some ideas :
- create/promote a platform explicitly made for "copyrighted" stuff (basically memes). Located outside of EU. But is it enough for being outside of the law ?
- Put some physical-paper memes near the EU parliament (I live in Brussels), just to mess with them ^_^
- Make the filtering algorithms crazy by spamming them with copyrighted content. I doubt this one will have any effect though...

Any ideas ? Let's go crazy there, they deserve it.

That's it. EU voted for universal copyright filters. Don't mind me, I'll migrate to the dark net

Article 13 has been FUCKING PASSED. SHIT SHIT FUCKEDDY FUCK ING FUCK-CHRIST ON A FUCKING FUCK BYCICLE MADE OF FUCKING ARSNIC COVERED LEGO BRICKS WITH PINS INSTEAD OF BUMPS BEING RIDDEN BY THE DECREPIT CORPSES THE EU CALLS A FUCKING GOVERNMENT!!

FUCK FUCK FUCKING FUCK SHIT AAAAAAAAAARGGGGG!

First chance I get I'm asking for a transfer to America.

It's when you lack electricity that you really start to question your life style

Big ++ from UK 🇬🇧 (not EU 🇪🇺 anymore though, sorry)! ☺

"Your code is just about as useful as the __pycache__ folder"

HAHA! Google just got fined 4.34bn EUR by the EU! According to the EU they forced manufacturers to preinstall their search app and browser. In my opinion, a fine like this is a nice statement, but doesn't really affect a company that makes 111bn US$ per year. I think there needs to be proper taxation for GAFA!
What do you guys think?

"Intense coding. A day passes. Wait, how the fuck did my code work? It doesn't make any sense!"

It happens so, so often, God why 😐

1) HTML turing complete
2) Kardashian programming language
3) EU resolution that forbids accepting and merging pull requests without court order.

Because why not.

How will the new GDPR law impact Non-EU citizens?

Websites: Let me slide in a little piece of data in your browser for your convenience so that you don't have to enter your password every time you come back. We even have a great name for it - Cookie!

EU - WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO OUR COMPUTERS, HOW DARE YOU MAKE OUR LIVES BETTER WITHOUT LETTING US KNOW FIRST.

(also pay us €10000000 k bye)

Okay, I know it's nothing and all that, but holy shit please either use british date standards on en_GB systems or use ISO-8601 everywhere. It's really confusing for someone from EU to read American dates..

windows :D

I have seen in a lot of forums (here, Imgur, reddit, LinkedIn etc) that there are a lot of developers without a job.

And most of them live in USA. I have not seen a person who is struggling to find a job in EU or some other place.

Why is this the case? In USA where the demand for developers is very high.

I read a post on LinkedIn: "40 INTERVIEWS and no one HIRED! Yet another friend telling me she can not find good talent. My thinking - If you interviewed 40 people and did not hire someone, then it's time to look in the mirror. The problem is recruiters and hiring managers are looking for the 'PERFECT" candidate. NEWSFLASH! There is no 'perfect' candidate. If you have someone with the right attitude and skill set, and they fit in with the team, why not HIRE them? There are so many qualified individuals still job searching. Yet I see the same jobs re-posted, over and over again, being left vacant for months. Who took a chance on you? Maybe it's time you a took chance on someone."

I don't think it is the "competition" because I see everywhere. I have seen entry-level or JR. open positions that are not filled for months.

It took me 1 month, sending nearly 20 applications every day to find a job in USA.
And the second one I got lucky. I applied in Europe and after some month I got transferred in offices in USA.

I do not know how true this is, but seriously, what's wrong with companies in USA that require the PERFECT candidate. Or is it something else?

Now the new EU copyright directive is getting closer, Google does A/B testing to comply with article 11.

Britain leaving the EU == Brexit

Me trying to leave Vim == Vexit

With the U.K now set to leave the EU my emigration plans to Australia just advanced 10 years #willcodeforvisa

Did GDPR actually make ANY difference to how our data is handled?

indent.py

Big names in the EU is visiting this city today. Traffic is fked up and I have been at the office real early today. Good thing that I brought my Switch so I can play some games while I am alone

Have any of you ever done this or worked with people who do this?

The new EU copyright reform (article 13, etc.) is getting comical.
After even the big copyright holders retracted their support for the law, it seemed to have no chance and was "put on ice".
After short while it was warmed up again by negotiating some trade offs (which are apparently hated by everyone) and it may or may not be passed in the next few weeks.
So far so idiotic.
It seem that even the initiator - Axel Voss - will not vote for the law. Unfortunately for wrong reasons. Why? It is not strict enough for him.

Anyhow, the longer text he used to present his view he he seems to - copy - his argumentation from Bertelsman (German media group).

It could be funny, if all of that wasn't so sad as there is still the possibility that this stupid law passes.

I really feel the need to just blacklist the entire EU, to not deal with additional shit like gdpr, I do see its benefits, but I am already busy with getting my client approved by paywalls, other services and get all that bullshit integrated - I really don't need having to also shit out some very detailed statement about it all, if you want something like that, then create a generator that gives me all you want with couple clicks, else get fucked outta my sight.

TIL in China you need to get a government issued license to run a website. Wouldn't surprise me if the EU started taking cards from their playbook.

Just had a client ring me to check I'll be voting the "right way" in the EU Referendum. WTF??

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Praesent sed velit a lorem vehicula ultricies. Phasellus in dui fringilla, mattis felis quis, bibendum nulla. Nunc egestas elementum risus, eu vulputate nibh posuere ut. In eget fermentum metus. Aliquam in ex et purus posuere laoreet nec at urna. Vivamus neque augue, porta id risus id, maximus dictum ligula. Morbi semper tellus est, ut congue turpis fermentum eu. Etiam ornare nec tellus nec ornare. Quisque vestibulum, sem nec luctus imperdiet, nunc ex consectetur elit, in dapibus nisi quam eget ipsum. Curabitur enim tortor, blandit non nulla sit amet, suscipit maximus lorem. Aliquam erat volutpat. Vivamus bibendum sodales ornare.

GDPR is about to happen.
Has anyone read the provisions?
It's like they put some flat earther anti-vaxers in a room and made them scribble up a law.

For those who don't know - it's a new, EU-wide "data privacy" law that's about to take effect on May 25th.

The gist of it is that if you fuck up even a little bit, you get to personally pay a fine of up to 10 Million Euros (for companies there's a separate clause, this is for employees only), or/and 2-3 years in jail if that fuck-up has caused material damages.
That little fuck-up can be as simple as losing a tiny amount of data between back-ups, or entrusting a third party with full access to some data (which is not prohibited) without controlling 100% what he can do with that data (which IS prohibited).

I shit you not, these are the explicit articles of that law.

If it is enforced in this way, it is the swift death of European economy. Just because some retards didn't read the privacy policy before agreeing to it, and then made a shit storm, everyone has to suffer.

So apparently there's going to be some sort of "link tax" for creating hyperlinks to other peoples websites.

What's next is the EU government going to start requiring people to register a license to run a webserver on their computer?

When the new gdpr came out there was a old website which was a table and there were no includes so I would've had to copy and paste the privacy link to every single page. So I wrote some JavaScript that finds the a Tag with a specific text inside and if it matched it placed a new a tag next to it for the privacy link. Works flawlessly so far but it is the hackiest thing I have ever done 😅

Well, being a British freelancer just became a thing of the past!

"We value your privacy, that's why we want you to agree to all of these tracking cookies."

Fucking GDPR, is getting on my nerves now, can't go anywhere without encountering a cookie wall.

999 dollars = 835,20 euro
Launch price of iPhone X, 1179,00 euros
Maybe it's because Apple pays too much revenue tax in EU , oh, wait...

The floor is Not Getting Shit Done Before Deadline

Dev Diary Entry #56
Dear diary, the part of the website that allows users to post their own articles - based on an robust rights system - through a rich text editor, is done! It has a revision system and everything. Now to work on a secure way for them to upload images and use these in their articles, as I don't allow links to external images on the site.

Dev Diary Entry #57
Dear diary, today I finally finished the image uploading feature for my website, and I have secured it as well as I can.

First, I check filesize and filetype client-side (for user convenience), then I check the same things serverside, and only allow images in certain formats to be uploaded.

Next, I completely disregard the original filename (and extension) of the image and generate UUIDs for them instead, and use fileinfo/mimetype to determine extension. I then recreate the image serverside, either in original dimensions or downsized if too large, and store the new image (and its thumbnail) in a non-shared, private folder outside the webpage root, inaccessible to other users, and add an image entry in my database that contains the file path, user who uploaded it, all that jazz.

I then serve the image to the users through a server-side script instead of allowing them direct access to the image. Great success. What could possibly go horribly wrong?

Dev Diary Entry #58
Dear diary, I am contemplating scrapping the idea of allowing users to upload images, text, comments or any other contents to the website, since I do not have the capacity to implement the copyright-filter that will probably soon become a requirement in the EU... :(

Wat to do, wat to do...

"It's very unfortunate that someone has to sit 10 hours a day on a computer screen but that's what we are paying for."
Working with an EU client.
Task is in stages beginning from assessment of an 9 year old Salesforce instance, cleanup and then transition to lightning.
The deliverabale in the first stage is excel sheet - objects(2400+), fields, apps, packages, profiles(110k), users, perm sets, apex classes, triggers, pages, s-controls and insert each and everything that a Salesforce instance could have.
Each and every data needs to be, analyzed and documented with our recommendations before being sent over. (Finding duplicates in 110k profiles??)
Oh, did I tell you, this was to be done four weeks? Weekend goes to hell.
That's when this beautiful motivational line comes up from the bridge, "It's very unfortunate that someone has to sit 10 hours a day on a computer screen but that's what we are paying for."
Fortunately(un?), that part of project is done and over with.

Now comes the clean up, identify packages not being used, remove them, qa and then push for deployment.
Mind you, this project is to be 2 weeks long. Its Friday of the first week today. And I am still working weekends.
Can I say, FML?

1. It's gonna be more and more specialized - to the point where we'll equal or even outdo the medical profession. Even today, you can put 100 techs/devs into a room and not find two doing the same job - that number will rise with the advent of even more new fields, languages and frameworks.

2. As most end users enjoy ignoring all security instructions, software and hardware will be locked down. This will be the disadvantage of developers, makers and hackers equally. The importance of social engineering means the platform development will focus on protecting the users from themselves, locking out legitimate tinkerers in the process.

3. With the EU getting into the backdoor game with eTLS (only 20 years after everyone else realized it's shit), informational security will reach an all-time low as criminals exploit the vulnerabilities that the standard will certainly have.

4. While good old-fashioned police work still applies to the internet, people will accept more and more mass surveillance as the voices of reason will be silenced. Devs will probably hear more and more about implementing these or joining the resistance.

5. We'll see major leaks, both as a consequence of mass-surveillance (done incompetently and thus, insecurely) and as activist retaliation.

6. As the political correctness morons continue invading our communities and projects, productivity will drop. A small group of more assertive devs will form - not pretty or presentable, but they - we - get shit done for the rest.

7. With IT becoming more and more public, pseudo-knowledge, FUD and sales bullshit will take over and, much like we're already seeing it in the financial sector, drown out any attempt of useful education. There will be a new silver-bullet, it will be useless. Like the rest. Stick to brass (as in IDS/IPS, Firewall, AV, Education), less expensive and more effective.

8. With the internet becoming a part of the real life without most people realizing it and/or acting accordingly, security issues will have more financial damages and potentially lethal consequences. We've already seen insulin pumps being hacked remotely and pacemakers' firmware being replaced without proper authentication. This will reach other areas.

9. After marijuana is legalized, dev productivity will either plummet or skyrocket. Or be entirely unaffected. Who cares, I'll roll the next one.

10. There will be new JS frameworks. The world will turn, it will rain.

To y'all complaining about services informing about updated policies..
That's like complaining about murder being illegal. It's a damn law. Of course this specific one is bullshit.
Read the fucken GDPR and stfu if you are from the EU.😊

European Union is really awesome with the new privacy regulation.

include Brexit;
include UKIP.bullshit.*;
Brexit.fuckUK(true);
UK.invoke(50); // Leave EU
Scotland.gainIndependence(true).request(EU.membership);
NorthernIreland.merge(RepublicOfIreland);
EnglandAndWales = UK.remains();
UK = null;

the api endpoint for retrieving user-data in an alexa skill might as well be api.eu.amazonalexa.com WITH .EU
this is not as good documented as it should be and did cost me several hours until i saw it by accident analyzing the request-data another time...
you´re welcome.

I finally found something to rant about! So what happened is that I am participating in the Digital Ocean competition (I need to do 5PR's). So I find a report with a lot of scripts. I decide to contribute and write a discord webhook API (send messages through a webhook). The next day, the guy goes "No thanks :)" and closes the PR. Words cannot express how triggered I am. I ask him if I can make anything else out of exasperation (I did not intend to do anything for him anymore, I can't explain why I did that), he tells me no...

;(

One month remaining until the new European Union regulation will be brought into force.

When you search for those letters here, you’ll see a lot of developers bending over to the EU and being happy about it. Some of them are even happy that it will kill a lot of small and medium businesses.

Large companies like Google have found ways to bypass the law, so regulatory forces will earn money by flocking small businesses or individuals with decades-old debts that will be also paid by the grandchildren (40 million euro).

Just wanted to share about what just happened today.

So I graduated with a CS degree 2 years in EU and since then worked in two companies for a year in each of them, where I was paid 18k EUR gross salary in both of my jobs.

Just today I accepted an offer in Sweden for 48K eur/year and they will help be with relocation!

I am extremely happy and starting my new position in 6 weeks. Going to exercise, try to loose some weight and get better clothes, just to look sharp! Also going to sharpen up my skills as well as have 2 weeks holiday before I start.

Morever I will maintain my current job as a contractor where they will pay me 27EUR/hour so every month I will get 50-100 hours of extra work. I just hope that I will be able to balance main job+contractor job+side projects. I know it wont be easy but I wont be in a relationship so it should be manageable!

I hate how people automatically assume anything coming out of China is spyware. Because the US and EU have such good reputations for preserving privacy right?

To be honest I forgot completely about the ducks and was kind of disappointed to see them, don't understand me wrong, its a great addition to the shop (especially to support devrant more when buying them and I will probably do too) and trogus (wow it's pronounced t-rogus) deserves a lot of respect for going through the very hard process of developing it, getting somebody to do a decent quality result etc. but I was hoping for the new site that got hyped up some time ago or some update to the app that fixes design issues on phones that have 2k resolution and no statusbar and more. ("just open a github issue" - I don't have one right now and it didn't get much attention anyway, since I am in the niche of people with those kind of setups, most people it seems have phones that can even barely run the app lol). The login still pops up each time you visit the site (basically just click it away, but it's rather annoying to have it pop up), it's nowhere near to the original app (although the native app is written in some sort of wrapper anyway?) - especially what comes to options, customizing, deactivating things, posting into categories (newest feature), getting notifications etc

There is some community builds that try to recreate a better desktop experience, but sadly fail to do so (sorry to devrantron and others, but what the fuck were you thinking when you rounded only the top right and left corner?) - since they always have something that is just thrown out to "be there" or design fails (which devrant just lacks and looks good across the board), that makes me rather cautious if that program doesn't send my credentials to some african prince. ("just look at the sourcecode", yes I have better things to do, thanks)

I could just create my own build, having to reverse engineer the whole website and app (granted, most of it are just api calls), but I simply lack the time (so I understand why my mentioned problems aren't getting really any attention or can't be implemented that fast, yet still its somewhat bugging)

I have listened to the Q&A and I know you guys are working full time at for example adobe (amazing that you both have time to be putting it towards devrant), so its not as much of a rant, just wanted to get out my disappointment about the event I felt personally. Still nice to have seen you and talk with the community a bit (although the time I feel was picked more towards your US audience rather than EU?).

Didn't even ask for 2 sets, the devRant team is just awesome! Thanks!

On and @localhost, it seems like people are sending their setup, so here's my student one :)

I start coding in the evening - sunny (middle EU)
*8 hours later*
I stop coding - sunny

In my brain: "I lost one day, or I am new Mr Strange and I stopped time"

His long do you think it will take for Google to come up with a true replacement for Java. A replacement, not an alternative like Kotlin, but a complete "go f**k yourself, Larry" replacement that anyone can port their Java app over to. On January 1, if you are a for profit, Larry had said if you want to update to the next version and use Java SE to code with, you need a support license. It's a brill move, because Java is everywhere, and at least for a little while, it will generate a respectable profit for Oracle. But I'm sure Google is working on something to stick it to Larry. Wonder if EU competition chief Vestager will threaten am investigation. This should be fun to watch.

Those EU cookie law notices COVERING UP the website so I have to click them and I'm not even in the EU so it doesn't apply here!

Anyone know small-medium companies hiring front end devs around the eu?

Or any recruiters with a soul?

React btw. Thanks.

Why yes. This is a last resort. Thanks for noticing/criticizing

Is there any Android gods here?
I have a (what I think is) bricked Motorola Moto X Style (XT1572 EU) that I am not able to do anything with.

Wanted to see myself working somewhere in EU as "AI / Machine Learning Engineer". Its a BIG DREAM.

I am SOOO fucking sick of being asked if our website and gaming servers are going to be GDPR compliant. All these game owners in a panic changing everything they do just to conform to this law.

Fuck GDPR. In all reality COME AT ME BITCH. The EU wants to grow a pair of balls and act like the world internet police? Bring it the FUCK on. You can't even stop pirating in your own country, so how the FUCK are you going to regulate and enforce this law on HUNDREDS of THOUSANDS of servers, when your punk ass government can't even shutdown a single torrenting website.

Give me a fucking break, and shame on you pussies for allowing it. All you people running around scared acting like your private gaming servers are important. I give a shit less how much work you put into your server. I have put more work than most anyone else, but you don't see me trying to act self important as if my gaming server is some fortune 500 company.

Your server isn't important and neither are you. The government doesn't give a shit about your server so can we all just stop acting like this fucking matters. NO ONE FUCKING CARES ABOUT YOUR SERVER.

NO ONE is going to come and sue you for not complying. GDPR is for business, and anyone that wants to argue no look it says right here it applies to all is a fucking MORON. Do you idiots stop and think or do you just believe everything typed out on paper.

THEY CANT ENFORCE THIS ON EVERYONE. They don't have the resources. So use your fucking heads and stop being so fucking scared of a law that has no resources to stop you. THEY CAN"T DO ANYTHING. EU and whoever made their polices, I DARE them to try and touch my server, I WANT them to start something with me, just so I can show the rest of the world why the Internet is still the wild west and why they have no power over me.

You think pirate bay is the only one who knows how to hide their server? You think pirate bay is the only one who keeps backups of their server to be able to re release in an instant somewhere else in the world? Bitch get real this is the internet, a place where a 5 year old can buy hand grenades from the Red Silk Road, and you wanna talk to me about your privacy? Go fuck yourself.

It's not my problem some douche bag went onto a site that used his personal information in the wrong manner. So how about you do what everyone else does and browse ANONYMOUSLY. But no it would be to easy for governments to make their own citizens responsible. Instead they have to hold all of YOUR hands, because you people are to stupid to protect yourself.

Wake the fuck up world, and stop being a bunch of whining little brats who cry for the government to bubble wrap your world so you can live safer. Natural selection is long overdue for a lot of morons still breathing air.

I only just started learning Js. And it's going smoothly. In two weeks, I should have gone past the Beginner's level. Then what next?

I'm sorry all my friends made this meme and I just had to

So the EU plans to make an "upload-filter"-law.
Actually this means that every service, every provider literally everyone has to check everything which is going to be uploaded on a webpage if there is an copyright violation and so on.

Thanks to my european government for slowing down the digital evolution in a absolutely shit way.

Does anyone else get triggered when you use the python socket .recv() and the server does not return anything so the program just stays there indefinitely? For me, I can't even Ctrl+C it so I have to close the entire window. It's especially annoying when I start a server in the interpreter (quite a bit of lines) and I have to rewrite it afterwards.

Once I had to integrate an analytics mechanism into a product my company was selling. Due to EU laws we had to put an opt-out checkbox into the installer. Took me a while to hack my way around various technical and legal impediments, but I got it done.

Long story short, product rolled out and we got data from about 0.1% our customers. Almost everybody opted out :/

Yesterday I had to register my new credit card with a national payment app (MobilePay) and it kept giving me error 32, which says "a technical error happened please try again"... Real fucking useful u peace of shit app 😠

Turns out, after a bit of research, that it will sometime crash if you language is not set to a european language. Guess what? I had mine set to English... English (US)... 😧

Like, what the fuck is that? Why would you check if a person might be from EU, be checking the language setting?
Get your shit together 😑

Just feel like going to a raised platform over my town and scream, "AHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....!!!"

19 Oct: EU approves Microsoft purchase of Github
21 Oct: (see attached)
Coincidence...? 🤔

I know Microsoft have an impressive track record for taking promising and/or popular products and turning them to shit but they've really outdone themselves this time with their immediacy.

Fucking hell. So, I had an interview with market research company and in said interview I got told to bring my passport to my first shift training and it was ok if it was 5 years out of date. Additional info, they were supposed to call us on Thursday to book said shift and send us an email with a information pack. They never did.

Ok, day of shift comes along. After I booked it because no one fucking bothered to call any of us. Email never arrived but whatever. I go to the place and bring my 3 years out of date polish passport... Big fucking mistake. They don't seem to like polish passport seeing as how it's only the British ones that get the out of date is okay thing. So I'm sitting there still calm because sure, company policy, they have to do it. The training guy was nice and all, offered to get me to their office to speak to them about it. I accept and off we go.

At the office, I basically get the information that it's only British passports that get it and I basically can't use anything else as proof of ID, which is funny seeing as I have a polish identity card that I can leave and enter the country on within the EU. I suppose I'm going to try looking for a job that doesn't require passports for now and if I find a good one then they can go get fucked by a bull for all I care.

In conclusion, I get to wait till I'm 18 (thankfully only a month) to apply for a new passport in the local polish consulate. Brilliant. All thanks to some cunt that decided they require fucking passports with such beautiful (note the sarcasm) rules. The fucktards.

Hoping the apocalypse comes early for these cocksuckers,
BadFox

People, finally back with a rant😌

You definitely have heard about the new privacy policies in the EU. What do you guys think about this BS?

Who the actual fuck has come up with such trash? Politicians can be such dumbfucks sometimes wtf..😐🤔

God Damn Privacy Regulations

Changes to our privacy policy
We've updated it privacy policy
New terms of service for your account
GDPR

Sigh...if i we're EU citizen it would be for the best, except for those businesses that can't bother to update but I'm not even EU.

Email filter activated!

What about the EU sending one email in the name of all companies next time?

Fucking cookies popups and now gdpr popups. EU is trolling internet.

So, I've been trying to learn assembly. However, I can't find any assembly docs online, so I can't really do anything. I tried NASM and FASM but I just can't understand assembly. Do y'all know any decent way to learn assembly? (My dad said it's better to do it on my pi or should I do it on my desktop?)

let's create a site of Creative-Commons-licensed meme templates. Who around here can host some stuff?

EU Referendum results are in and it looks like Britain is leaving.

Scary times ahead! Good job I'm part of a global industry eh?

Namecheap made whois protection free for everyone, probably because of GDPR, but they cannot be used on .eu domains.

Am currently loosing my job in London due to no fault of mine. I've got an offer in Amsterdam for €72k. I've no idea how to feel about brexit or it's effects in the near future.
Is the base pay even good for a Senior .Net dev?
Should I take the offer or stay in London? What would you do?
BTW am not an EU/EEA Citizen, I do require work permits in either places.

#whatsappDown in EU.
#telegramIsBetter.

maybe whatsapp servers have too (meta)data to analyze ;-)

i expect to see at least one comment with #signalIsBetter.

(10AM CET)

Google was just fined €4.34billion for "using Android as a vehicle to cement dominance of its search engine"-CNN. It's related to Google's products being preinstalled on Android. They say that Google was paying phone manufacturers to preinstall some Googles apps before they were sold. Idk why is that a problem (btw I have Facebook on my S8 preinstalled, and there isn't even an option to delete it, but Facebook is not getting fined or anything). Anyone else thinks EU is using the power and sheer size of Google just to get some money out of them, this is the second time that EU is punishing Google with those massive fines.
And one more thing, can anyone explain to me, why is it a problem for Google to preinstall their product on their device that is running their OS?

Google Cloud Services can't be used by private individuals in the EU because their billing system isn't customized for tax differences between companies and private individuals (it's the exact same tax, just named differently - and the doings for the service providers control drivers are different). How can Google miss that market?
Hello Amazon Glacier, hello AWS (maybe)...

Is learning VIM worth it?

I have some (probably unjustified) prejudices to it - I find it rather visually unattractive. But it seems to me also that it boosts productivity.

So do you recommend it and what is least painful way to learn it?

Fun fact: Busses in our town... or is it a city now? Haven't checked the population count in a while... anyway, they've got some... what would you call it... double-sided weird thing with monitors inside hanging from the ceiling and they are supposed to be used to play ads but only thing that airs there are videos from RedBull TV and an occasional "ad" reminding everyone who's paying for some fancy new buildings in the city(the EU), now that would be fine... But why the heck does the PC that runs them reboot every time the bus hits a bump or a pothole in the road and most of all why does it run a full-blown Ubuntu 10.04?!! I mean it's still better than running Windows but just why... why are they even using PCs... A Raspberry Pi would be more than enough for the job...

How to approach job applications for EU and US market?

I have applied at multiple places and have never made it even to the first stage. The jobs I apply for, pretty much match my experience level and stack.

Does this have something to do with visa issues since I am from the Middle East?

Or is there something else I am possible missing out on.

I just finished my second semester of computer programming. I then say to myself : "Let's use my new knowledge to make the program I worked on for fun two years ago better and more efficient!".

It was a bad idea.

🤬So I spent half an hour at my post office to pick up a certified letter. It turned out to be a paper version of „we have updated our privacy policy” from a company I last dealt with 5 years ago. 🤬🤬🤬
I want to thank my EU lawmakers for always thinking about our logging industry. I still don’t see why I need gdpr, though. I still dont know how the voters can stop this kind of non democratic nonsense in the future.

I've seen a lot of buzz around the EU's GDPR and since I don't live there I'm wondering if it applies only if you store personal data and should it count if it's hashed for example?🤔

Let's say you hash a client's IP, it's not technically his data you've irreversibly transformed it into something else, like a computation.

For example let's say he provides you with a number and you multiply it by another and store the result, let's say 2 x 2 = 4, Is the 4 his data or yours?

Also I'm really interested in the general opinion of ranters about article 13.

Today is a sad day. I wanted to do some experimenting with the Google Cloud Vision API, but apparently EU users can use it only as Business user (which sadly I'm not). Why Google, why are you betraying me? 😭

Started my very first (summer) job as an IT agent in customer service for my city less than two weeks ago and finally moving out from the formations to answer the phone alone.

I must've listened to around 30 calls and already there's stories I could make tales of.

I now understand the job of customer service.

Hi guys. Have a question about working in USA as a foreigner (EU national). Next year I plan on coming to work in the US under H1B visa in a big company where I will have opportunity to apply for EB3 green card after 6 months of working there. Lets say I get the green card in 2-3 years and Im finally free from my first work in US. How hard it would be for me to find another job in there? I mean I will have few years of experience under my belt so thats fine. But what about education which was acquired not in USA? Like I dont have a GED or a bachelors degree from US. Is it true that without US education most of employers wont even consider to invite me for an interview?

Where are you located my fellow ranter?

Me /Denmark, EU

What are you currently working on? You can be as vague as possible and let others try to figure it out.

I’m currently working on something to make pelican based blogs look a bit decent.

How long does it take to start writing codes without having to do “too much” looking up of some context?

I’m quite at the intermediate level and I fear I do a lot of cramming(and pouring) than actual coding.

I want to code all on my own, or at least tons of lines before having to check something up.

How do you guys do it? How do I become ‘pro’?

I was looking forward to creating app like Alipay for US/EU market, then I realized Venmo exists. What do you think, is it still worth trying to compete? Outside of Venmo we don't really have any other competition.

So i got this service i made for fun and learning. Theres many providers in it for money, not me, only a little (lets not lie to ourselves).
Id just like to have a handful of happy clients to make it pay for itself so i dont lose money.
I have no idea how to advertise or gain clients. Those potential clients i cling with are from US and the server is in EU, and i wont convince anyone to buy something i wouldnt buy myself.

I suck at marketing.

How do you know that you are stuck in a job without longterm perspective (besides some undefined gut feeling)?

And what to do then? It seems to me, only possible action is to change job. Is there any, less extreme, alternative?

I'm currently having a problems sleeping my inner philosopher just keeps thinking about various things. I wanna try to write some of them down as an simply to see what will happen.

I'll write my opinion down as honest as possible so feel free to disagree, but point out what I should rethink, if you want me to consider it.

To me respect has to be earned. I think especially on the internet many people try to skip this crucial step when they try to get respect. Most often when they want an opinion or their ideals to be respected. Most of the time it doesn't even feel like they want to be respected, but rather accepted.

There's nothing wrong with accepted in my opinion, but there are several approaches to get to this point and I despise some of them.

Earning acceptance by earning respect is one of the right ways to do it. Working hard towards your goals, showing your individual strength, standing behind your ideals. These are things I can respect.

I should also mention that these Ideals should be concrete, based on rational thought and a general good will or you will just twist my words to say that I support e.g. IS, Stalin's politics ect.

On a side node, I think it'd be wrong to disrespect everything Stalin did, since, from an economical point of view, he pushed Russia forward by quite a bit.

Then on the other side I see crybabies. People who want to be accepted, without putting effort in their ideals. Most of the time not even aiming for acceptance through respect, but through pity. Honestly, that's all they're going to get from me.

Pity, for their petty ideals.

Basically all I ever see these people doing is attention whoring and practicing multiple deadly sins at once.

Wrath, jealousy, sloth, pride, greed and optionally also gluttony.

Lust is rather a separate package. When I think about it, I link it mostly to horny teens and "send bob and vegane" type of stuff.
Gluttony being powered by sloth or vice versa, enhancing it.

The clear image I have in mind, while I write about this packages of deadly sins however, is that of a jealous person, complaining / getting angry about something they could change change themselves, but want them to be changed for them. Mostly through social networks such as Facebook, Twitter and whatever the fuck Tumblr is supposed to be.

"I wanna be rich, why is <person> richt but I'm not? This world is so unfair 😡". Have you tried working towards becoming rich?

"I don't don't feel pretty. Accept me". Accept yourself. Done.

"I don't like <person or organization>'s doing". If that's the whole message, all you probably did so far is complaining or crying. Sweet tears.

Stuff like that can happen to any person, just like any person makes mistakes.
Mistakes are made to learn from them. If you realize realize and accept your mistakes others may do so as well and forgive you.

But we are he towards this idiotic trend where people just can swallow their pride even for microscopic things. They instead push their pride to higher levels of ignorance, blaming other people, l(ying)mfao, creating black holes of density in the process. Makes me wonder whether their real motive is an inside bet on who can get the most people to kill them selves by face palming.

Most of my life I have been fairly protected against these people, besides some spikes of incompetence, but recently the have invaded 2 areas in my world that make the world somewhat less of a pain. Programming and the internet culture.

Yes, I'm talking about that master / slave BS renaming and article 11 and 13.

The remaking itself isn't really the problem, but rather the context. This was basically a show of power for the self proclaimed "social justice warriors" or SJW for short.

The fact that this madness has spread. That's what worries me. To me it feels like the first zombie has spawned.

Then we have this corrupted piece of incompetent shit, called Axel Voss, and other old farts.

They live in a galaxy far away from reality, somewhere in the European Parlament, making laws they don't know shit about, regulating things they know shit about.

All in the name of the people of the EU of course. And by people we obviously talk about the money.

I can honestly not think of another reason, after reading the replies Voss and his party gave on Twitter regarding the shit they pulled off.
Well, at least none that doesn't involve some firm of brain death.

For now I'll show them as much as possible how much I despise / reject them. Currently playing with the thought of some kind (social media?) website were posts from other sites or actions in general can be rated only with "Fuck you"s.
Given these articles, I should not have them hosted in an European country though 😅.

Almost hitting that 5k character limit 😰