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Search - "they are back"
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Agency: " Sir, we found 3 candidates as per your requirements, now how do you want their placements sir?"
M.D: "Put about 100 bricks in a closed room. Then send the candidates into the room & close the door, leave them alone & come back after a few hours and analyse the situation:-
1) If they are counting the bricks, Put them in Accounts deptt.
2) If they are re-counting the bricks, Put them in Auditing.
3) If they have messed up the whole room with the bricks, Put them in Engineering.
4) If they are arranging the bricks in some strange order, Put them in Planning.
5) If they are throwing the bricks at each other, Put them in Operations.
6) If they are sleeping, Put them in Security.
7) If they have broken the bricks into pieces, Put them in Information Technology.
8) If they are sitting idle, Put them in Human Resources.
9) If they say they have tried different combinations yet not a single brick has been moved, Put them in Sales.
10) If they have already left for the day, Put them in Marketing.
11) If they are staring out of the window, Put them in Strategic Planning.
And.......
12) If they are talking to each other and not a single brick has been touched, Congratulate them and put them in Top Management.
😂🤣😃😁😅😜6 -
We need more JS devs for our frontend.
After half a year of PM complaining that he doesn’t find devs, he finally came back to us:
„Sorry guys, I found two devs, but they are not Java developers, they only do JavaScript“
Me:
Team:
*both speechless*
TeamLead: „... wait, you searched for Java devs half a year?“25 -
The programmer and the interns part 3.
Many of you asked me to keep posting about the interns that I'm responsible for.
I had the intention but never had the time or the energy. Since the interns only kept doing stupid, unthinkable things and just filtering out the good ones is a task of its own.
Time has passed, some interns left us by their choice, others were fired (for obvious reasons). Some stayed loyal and were given permanent positions. New ones joined. I no longer am directly responsible for their wellbeing, yet, somehow I am still their tech-lead and the developer of their tools.
Without further delay,
Case 0:
New guy get's into the internship, has his LinkedIn title set to ‘HTML Technician’.
Didn’t know about the existence of HTML5.
Been building static web pages in the early 2000s. The kind with embedded, inline CSS.
Claims that he is about to finish an engineering degree (sadly I believe him).
Fails the entry level Linux test. Complains about the similarity of the answer options.
Fails the basic web-standars test because "they change so fast, but the foundation is HTML and it's rock-solid!".
Get's caught taking home onions and milk from the kitchen.
Is spotted eating in a restaurant under our offices in his day off. Thrice. He lives a 30 minute drive away and comes here on a bicycle or by bus.
Apparently didn't know that the scrolling wheel on the mouse is clickable.
Said that his PC experience is mostly from his PlayStation (PC = PlayCtation apparently).
Get's fired, says that he'll go to the press. Never does.
Case 1:
Yet another new intern. He seems very eager to learn and work, capable, even charismatic. Has an impressive CV.
Does nothing.
Learns from the "case 0" guy and spends time with him until he is fired.
Comes to work at 8:00 AM and immediately goes to sleep on an office puff. In front of everyone.
Keeps dining alone, without a notice, at different times, for hours. Sometimes brings food into the office and loudly eats it there.
On his evening shifts keeps disappearing for long periods of time. Apparently drinking in the nearby bars and hitting on girls.
Keeps bragging about his success with getting their numbers and rants about those who reject him.
For over a year he fails his final training test and remains a trainee, without the ability to work on a real case.
Not fired yet.
Case 2:
Company retreat. Beautiful, exotic views, warm sun beams, all inclusive package for everyone on a huge half-island.
Simon (he's still with us, now as a true engineer!) brings his MacBook to the beach in order to work and impress all others.
Everybody get's drunk and start throwing huge inflatable balls at each other. One hits his laptop and it immediately is flattened.
Upset Simon is going in circles and ranting about the situation, looking for a solution.
Loses his phone on the beach.
Takes his broken laptop with him while searching for the phone.
Dips the laptop in the river while drunkenly ducking in order to pick a clam.
Case 3:
Still company retreat.
Drunk intern makes out with an employee's drunk wife.
Huge verbal fight. The husband says that he files for a divorce. Intern get's fired.
Case 4:
Still company retreat.
Three interns each take an inflatable swimming mattress and drift with the current. Get found on the other side of the resort three hours later, with red skin and severely dehydrated.
Case 5:
Still company retreat.
The 'informally fired' intern gets drunk again, climbs through a window into a room and makes out with an employee's drunk wife.
Again, gets caught when the husband returns to find a locked door but can see them though the window.
Case 6:
Still company retreat.
We all get ferociously drunk and wander off to the unknown in search of more booze.
Everybody does something stupid and somebody finds Simon's phone.
Simon is lost.
Frenzied horde of drunks is roaming the half-island in search of ethanol and the lost comrade.
Simon's phone get's permanently lost.
Five people step on sea urchins but find that out only hours later and then are unable to walk.
The mob, now including more drunk people who joined voluntarily, finds the sexually active intern making out with the enraged employee's wife yet again.
Surprisingly Simon is found sleeping in a room nearby.24 -
Me: *opens a terminal in front of parents and starts a build script from command line. Logs start rapidly flooding the screen*
Mom: *whispers to dad proudly* “look at how much she has worked. Look how fast the lines are running on the screen!!
I didn’t wanna burst their bubble by explain them that their child is NOT doing any rocket science, and is something even they can do(maybe better).
So I responded back with a fake serious tone
“Yeah it’s all code.”
If only they knew what I was actually doing...10 -
There are times when being "friendly neighbor it guy" pays back.
I have a neighbors, their son is little less intelligent than average person after being injured in accident, I help them from time to time. He gets the pc trashed with adware, usual stuff, they ask me to clean it up.
Recently I broke my arm. They offered to cook for me until I recover to full health... Seriously, that's huge help when you live alone and spend most time working. I'm glad to have them.
Wanted to share with you guys, there are people who appreciate your help with their pc and can give back if you're in need.3 -
Last Sunday the boss says:
About this project we are working on, the client stopped paying, so we are not touching it untill we hear back from him.
Spent the whole week learning new technologies, and having a good time.
Guess what happens this morning...
Listen, about that project, they paid and it needs to be delivered by tomorrow morning! shouldn't be a problem, right?
Well actually...6 -
i work on a music streaming app.
bug: playlist description shows there are X songs inside. But when you go inside it says there are Y songs in the list. the list actually containing Y songs.
hack: when a user goes in, cache Y and display it outside in the description next time.
result: user sees X songs in playlist description, goes in playlist and sees Y songs. goes back to check why it said X before but now it doesnt say X anymore coz we cached Y and display that in the description from now on so the user assumes they are imagining things17 -
In my 1st semester, they taught us C++ basics
In my 2nd semester, they didn't teach us shit about CS.
In my 3rd semester, they taught us C basics
In my 4th semester, they taught us Java basics
In my 5th semester, they are teaching us Scratch and Python basics
Can you be fucking done with basics already for fuck sake? I'm a fucking Front End Developer here interning with companies and getting paid whilst I pay a fucking huge sum as college fee and learn fucking basics I knew back in high school? And you're teaching me Scratch, what the fuck is wrong with you; kids in pre-school are taught scratch. Fuck you education system, India!
Which countries should I consider for my post grad?
I'm so fucking done here.24 -
Saw my uncle using Microsoft Edge today.
Me: Uncle, you should use Chrome or Firefox. They are better.
Uncle: Windows 10 showed a pop up few days back that chrome drains battery faster. So I uninstalled chrome.
Me: But Windows is fooling you to use its product. Edge is horrible and useless.
Uncle: So you think you are smarter than Windows people? Are they idiots who designed this whole software?
Microsoft u got 1 more Edge user. Enjoy, you lying and misleading company.28 -
1. Submit my resume, get an email asking to schedule an interview
2. Schedule the interview
3. One day before the scheduled time, I get an email saying that the interview is being rescheduled to another time two days later (no explanation for why they did this)
4. I clear out my schedule and wait for the interview call (it’s suppose to be at 2:30, but I wait like 15 minutes early because I don’t want to miss it)
5. I don’t get a call
6. At 3:00, I call the company and ask whats going on. They apologize and say my interviewer will call me back as soon as he gets back from lunch.
7. He doesn’t call.
8. At 4:00 I call them back. Apparently the guy who was suppose to interview me went home. I ask them wtf they are doing and if this is how they treat their employees. They said they would reschedule the interview and call me back once they did.
9. No one calls.
10. I wait a week, call them back, and am told that the funding for my position didn’t come through (what does that mean? You’re not hiring programmers to design the software for your billion dollar war machines anymore? Seriously?).
I’ve had it with this company. I don’t know if it was just this incompetent recruiting group or if this is a company full of scumbags, but I mean, really?1 -
I told these people that this issue would happen. Did they listen? Nooo
It'll be fine, they say. We likely won't be having that much data returned to the front end, they say.
Day of the install. Web Application attempts to query 68,000 rows of data straight into the web page.
*Surprised Pikachu face* when they are consistently getting crashed browser tabs.
And now everything gets pushed back and we're behind by an entire month because they didn't heed my warnings.
Oh, and now I have to pick up after them, and do some stupid work arounds that will likely be defunct in a month or two. 🙄5 -
Management:
"We're gonna make our own builder that sets up pre configured files.
So we are gonna get rid again of GIT, because with our system you shouldnt be working over each others files if you keep out of other peoples files."
So they basically are saying, we are going back to no version control because you should all keep to the honor system because our system is better.
I'm fucking leaving...
And possibly leaving a poison pill to boot12 -
In an alternate universe, devs live in their own country.
They make their own rules and dictate how much they are paid. They maintain the entire world’s infrastructure.
They don’t go to work, since their entire country is the workplace and guess what? Cold beers are free(a thank you from the beer company guys for coming up with all their inventory management systems)
Pizza is free too.
There is no government (laws are passed depending on upvotes on devRant )
No racism, sexism or any other ism ending words . Devs just code.
Oh, and the state police, preferably known as keyboard warriors patrol the streets and offenders are punished by limited internet speeds. 😂. It is said some actually commit suicide because of this unbearable punishment.
Fuck yeah they have coffee farms. That’s the only thing they don’t accept as *gratitude from other nations because those sons of bitches might fuck that up too.
And everyone drives teslas 😂
Okay I have to get back to work now. That multi universe travel machine won’t buy itself.15 -
Recruiter: are you interested in a client side java role?
Me: yes, here is my client side resume please submit me
Recruiter: sorry the hiring manager said they are looking for more of a back-end engineer
Me: you told me it was a client side role, please resubmit me with my back-end geared resume
Recruiter: yes that's correct, it's client side, we'll keep you in mind for the future but you should know there is a difference between mobile devs and web devs
Me: what you just said is not relevant to this conversation. I would be happy to discuss the diff between front-end and back-end, client vs server, etc.
Recruiter: I'm just relaying what the hiring manager is saying to me
Me: your [lack of] ability to relay technical information is quite apparent :/
*lesson learned*: interview recruiters before they start interviewing me
Unbelievable waste of time, how do these people even make a living? FML!16 -
Swagger does not send request body for GET calls.! WHAT THE FUCK..! And the argument supporting is get calls should not have any request payloads and rather should have response payloads since its a "get" call. Are you serious?? What if there are parameters to be passed which cannot be accomodated in the params or the header. Even though people are kind of literally abusing on their issues page still they adamantly refuse to add support for this.
Swagger you had high standards in my book. You just fell so deep down there is no coming back.3 -
>be me
>I hate front-end dev, but I can do it. I hate switching between markup, styling, and logic.
>I like back-end and low level programming
>stay unemployed for a year and a half, because all offers are for React and Angular
>find backend job, yay
>they actually make me work on front-end shit
>mfw pic related7 -
!rant
Let's take a moment to appreciate interested and enthousiastic non-developers who really want to learn a programming language.
I am studying Medical IT at my college and most of my classmates aren't coming from an IT background.
We're currently working with Java, PHP, JavaScript and some require Node for their semester projects.
Some of my classmates approach me when they're stuck while coding and I try to teach them as much as possible so they understand what they are doing wrong and how to fix it.
I also show them how they can optimise their code step by step and they love it!
As a classmate told me yesterday:
"It's always so much fun working with you. I come up with a small problem, but I end up learning so much more about programming when solving a problem with you. I appreciate that."
It's a mindset I've learned when I was doing my developer apprenticeship back in the day. One of my colleagues told me: "if they want your help because they need a quick fix, tell them to kiss your ass. If you know they've already tried everything they could and ask you specifically because they want to understand what they are doing wrong, they are future developers with great potential, so go teach them."
May the force be with you, my enthousiastic little non-devs ❤️6 -
People say programmers are no fun!! But they don't know the truth.
We have big Ass container of emotions almost ready to explode anytime. We are spending too much time in debugging stuff one after another that having a free time is just a hoax to us, even when we came back home for sleep, it's only to dream about solution. We would be happy with debugging the error that is not letting us sleep for weeks.4 -
The way most of us devs are spending time on devRant, it seems @dfox might need to introduce a feature named "Reminder" in the app to let devs know that they need to get back to code.1
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Microsoft are getting a lot of pats on the back today for open sourcing MS-DOS. It might have meant something before FreeDOS was so well established and mature, but now... really, who gives a shit? Even more significant, they already "open sourced" it before, just not hosted on GitHub.
Here's the thing. Going open source is like losing your virginity. You only get to do it once, you can't take it back, and you certainly can't claim to be doing it again just because you're using a different host.9 -
My parents are real sticklers for who is allowed to be on Netflix. They only let people on when they are present, and they never click 'save password'.
Me being a poor college student and desperate for the Netflix password, created a fake website for one of my parents to sign into.
How did I do this? I created my own localhost server with a backend database for the password to go to. I then copied the Netflix home screen and log in and asked them to log me into their account.
They said I can be on for one hour, and then they were signing me out.
I agreed to these terms.
As a small twist, I had also copied the no internet tab from Chrome for the page to redirect to. Knowing that once they logged in they would be expecting the main UI.
They logged in and then waited for the page to load. I, of course, put in a delay for the page to load and then displayed the no internet tab. They were confused and asked me to refresh, still nothing. I asked them if the router was out, and they went to check.
While they were away I quickly switched back to the real Netflix website and yelled back saying I got it working again. They came back over and saw that it was asking for a password again. They signed in and saw the main homepage and none were the wiser that day.
Once they left I checked inside the DB and found the plaintext password they typed in... The damn password was so simple, I cursed myself for not having figured it out sooner. No matter, I had my parents Netflix password.
So you're probably wondering how they didn't see the URL above and think something was off?
I pressed F11 and fullscreened my entire browser. They did ask, and I simply replied with, I don't like seeing all the crap up above when I'm streaming. No further questions, perhaps I was lucky.14 -
In 2012 my parents bought a new cordless phone with base station for their home. Worked fine.
Unless sometimes, nobody was reachable - mostly, when they weren't home - of course nobody would answer the phone.
Finally I called them one day, and mom answered the phon - "Hi, we are going to the mall now, when will you come ... bzz" - beep beep. Nothing until I came home.
They just came back from the mall, when I arrived. And mom said - this phone won't work - and took the cordless phone out of her bag, which she took to the mall ... yes. mom - that's no mobile ... I had to explain. -
Because of hardware failure we had to move some vpns from one datacenter to another.
The team of highly untrained monkeys at my hosting provider were hired to do this. First they ran backups of all the systems. Then they started the moving process. A few hours later they were done. We got an email everything was back online.
So we restarted all our processes and no data was coming in from our Raspberry's around the country. So we start a little investigation. What did these buffons do, they changed our rsa keys.
So we kindly ask them to put the old keys back so we do not have to fix 200 changed key warnings on systems that are not remotely accesible.
Apperently something that can't be done because their back up process is automated and always makes new keys.
Holy fucking fuck, whats the point in having a backup its not an exact copy. Is this fucking normal?
Now I will be spending the next few weeks literally standing in cow shit reconnecting Raspberry's.
Thanks a fucking lot. Not!4 -
>> this === rant
<< true
At beginning of this year, I only knew HTML, JS, and CSS so I just applied for offers like "Jr Apprentice Dev in Front-End"
In a interview call, the woman told me that they will send me a test asking about my JS and HTML5 knowledge.
When I look in my inbox, the mail subject says "Back-end Test".
Then I call the woman:
Me: "Hello, I have received the test mail, but maybe it's wrong. I applied for a Front-End position and the test is about backend! "
She: "Do you have skills in JS and HTML5?"
Me: "Yes!, and CSS3"
She: "Well, the test is about that. JS, jQuery, and HTML5"
Me: "..."
Me: "Sorry, that languages are Front-End. In the subject say 'Back-End' and Back-End is PHP, SQL, MySQL, Java, .Net... I don't know nothing about that. I only know HTML, JS, CSS."
She: "It's the same"
Me: "I sorry but it's not the same. Fron-End is client-side, what users sees. Animation, colors, FXs, buttons, forms... And Back-End is server-side, what users doesn't see."
She: "Well, JS, HTML, and CSS is backend for us. We call it that way too"
Me: "Sorry but that is wrong. I invite you to read some basic info. Now I am confused"
Of course that I am not confused. That idi0t was wrong.
Perhaps recruiters should take some info about areas where they are recruiting... (:T)3 -
When you teach someone to use git and all.of a sudden you are required to supply all the answers when they run into problems:/
I tried to point them to Google and they still keep coming back. Why the fuck did I do this to myself?9 -
So i've spent the day:
a) Finding evidence (again) of product not doing their job, to send on to one of my managers. So we can again discuss why she's still here.
b) Explaining to my iOS developer that although all the devs are in agreement that 2 of them are not pulling their weight and shouldn't be here ... they will definitely still be here because management actually want to keep our multi-timezone setup as they see it as beneficial. We, do not.
c) Having a meeting with another manager, in a different department. (Backstory, a member of their team has had many complaints filed against them by various members of the building, including one from my team). To let them know that my employee felt like you ignored her concerns and complaints and are going to allow this person pass their probation without considering the implications.
I hope to actually find some time in the reminder of the day to actually achieve something, rather than just telling skidmarks that they are in fact skidmarks.
... but probably won't due to 3 hours of pointless back to back meetings, where we answer the same few questions every week.
I really do love being a tech lead. So refreshing. -
Dev: (Watches user print out screenshot of maintenance app to do list, walk across facility to printer. walk across facility to equipment and check things off on paper, then walk across facility back to their terminal and copy the findings over.)
Dev: We made the app responsive so they could do that on a mobile device. Why are they printing?
Manager: Printers are cheaper than getting more tablets.
Dev: …
Dev: Can we at least get a printer at each terminal so they don’t waste so much time walking across the facility?
Manager: That’s too many printers to maintain. It’s easier to just have one.
Dev: …8 -
I find smart watches so rude.
You are talking to someone and the bloody watch goes dinggg..
So the person you are talking to, stops listening, checks their smart watch, and performs whatever action they want before getting back to the conversation.
I fucking hate it. Not only you are rude to me, but also broke the chain of thought and rhythm of the conversation.
Fuck you and fuck your smart watch.
The other day I saw the office boy and the janitor wearing a smart watch. Mind you, the salaries of these folks is not more than $250 a month. Yet they have a top quality smart phone and a smart watch, where the combo usually costs more than their monthly salary.
It's important to consume and show off, than to make the bloody ends meet.
A monkey world.24 -
I don't get it, really...
A web agency in my city published an ad on a jobs listing website; they search a php programmer who knows about magento. On their website, in the "contact us" page, they say that they are looking for:
- a graphic designer
- junior php dev
- magento dev
I sent my cv; they call me back for an interview.
This morning i went there for the interview; when the interview ended the guy just said to me "well, we don't have any open position at this moment. We make interviews from time to time, just in case in the future we may need help".
Ok. Now 2 things come to my mind:
1- i need a job now; if 3 months from now you call me cause you REALLY need a php dev, i will probably (hopefully) already have another job
2- FFS i lost 2 hours for you: 50 minutes of traffic going, 20 minutes interview and another 50 minutes of traffic going back home...
Just why?5 -
I'm so over the politics....
System team: So, we've rewritten the entire site and the stats are looking pretty great. We're more than a year into the two-month transition period, and hey, that's cool, no judgement. But now we're gonna hit a license expiration on the old site, so we need to shut it down, or otherwise pay a ridiculously big amount to renew the license.
Business: nooooooooo you can't shut down the old site!
Systems: but nobody is using it
Business: yes, they are
Systems: no, they're really not, we checked and everything
Business: ...........
Systems: ok, well are you gonna pay for the license renewal?
Business: oh hell no
Systems: ok then we're shutting it down
Business: ..............
Systems: ok, it's down
Business: how dare you! We didn't sign off on that! Bring it back immediately!
Systems: are you gonna pay the license?
Business: no! now bring it back!
FML.7 -
What the fuck is wrong with the designers? We have had meetings with the client, a proposal drawn up, a project spec written, budget agreed, witeframes drawn up exactly to spec. Designer involved in all stages for input and ideas. Now the designers have the wireframes, they are supposed to create based on these. No they make up what goes on the pages that bare no resemblance to the wireframes in terms of requirements. I am fucking fuming. I have sent the designs back with a note. Please provide designs based on the wireframes.17
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Nature of Startups
Sales executive go and sell the features which are not available in the product.
They come back and inform them to the manager, then the manager makes the request to dev team to do the features.
After all these the discussion will be made in the morning and delivery is expected by evening.5 -
Bout to loose my shit. Fucking hate it when clients push and push to launch the system as urgently as possible. Say they have run through the test version and understand what they are getting and sign it all off. Then come back 2am the day after launch and bitch and moan cause its missing features they thought where there when they weren't part of the original planning and always use the excuse "i have just bought a bunch of marketing, your loosing me money" or "I have an important even with important people that need this tomorrow" and try make it your fucking problem.
Firstly, fuck you
Secondaly, fuck you.
I cant even comprehend your lack of logic.5 -
Interviewer: Sell me this pen
He: Hey do you want to buy this pen ?
Interviewer: No
He: You might need it to write stuff
Interviewer: No, I don't need it.
He: Ok, no problem.. Bye
Interviewer: What are you trying to do?
He: Trying to be a part of a company that doesn't sell stuff to people they don't need or want ..
Interviewer:
He:
Interviewer: Please give my pen back..7 -
A client of mine kept getting hit with a ransomware that was spread over rdp. So I set aside this whole week going to different sites this guy owns. Setting up a VPN tunnel and showing them how to use it. So they didn't have to rdp anymore. No more having a server with rdp facing on the outside of there network. They were all linked in like they were in the same office. I traveled around 400 miles going to all these locations. I finally got it done went back to the main office to talk to the owner. Instead of a thank first thing they say as soon as I walk in is to revert it all. We are going with a different company and they are buying new computers and server from the other company. After he tells me that he then says but when the new computers come in will you come and set them up for us because we are stupid with computers.
I reverted the stuff and walked out. Didn't say a word to him. Didn't agree to set up the new computers. Why should I set them up. He just pretty much bent me over and screwed me out of a extra couple thousand dollars.3 -
The wife ask her husband to run some errands..
Wife: "Honey, please go to the market and buy 1 dozen of eggs, and if they have milk, buy 2."
Husband: "Ok honey!"
After a while, the husband came back..
Husband: "Honey! Here are your 2 dozen eggs!"4 -
They always say "Stop wasting time".
They always say "Just use the tools we are all using".
They always say "I get it, you're the OSS guy. IDC, go to work now".
They always say "I hope you won't be logging this time on our customer's timesheet".
And they always come back to me "Look, I've heard that tool you've made/found is really cool and efficient, saves lots of trouble and makes us go faster. Can you send it to me via slack? TIA"
I see things that could/should work better and I make them do exactly that. It's my gift. It's my curse.3 -
Installed a custom ROM.
The emoji's here are much like the android blobs but they are slightly different. I think they're uglier/unnatural.
I WANT MY FUCKING BLOBS BACK 😤20 -
Reminder that you shouldn't trust head hunters.
I reached out to one a month or two back, because I knew they had worked with Company X in the past, and I figured they might get me a more direct line to HR.
They said company X wasn't hiring, that I should apply to Y and Z.
I started working at company X on Monday. They only wanted me to apply to Y and Z because those are the positions that recruiter was specifically trying to fill.
Recruiters are not your friend. They do not have your best interests at heart. They can be useful, but don't trust them.1 -
Never had one due to this trick I borrowed from an old friend.
So we all know about those meetings where its all crap flying around right?.
First go in there with your alarm clock set on vibration every 7 minutes(trust me on this-makes you look important and you ought to be somewhere else)
Actually the alarm is a reminder that you need to bring yourself back online.
At this point just listen to the speaker for a couple of seconds(especially if its marketing dept) and being the engineer your are; rephrase parts of their presentation in a question-comment hybrid( at this point you're the wisest looking person in the room)
Now go back to thinking about that pizza slice you left in the fridge as they discuss the "lean production" methods that they can use based on "your opinion"..
To more happy meetings..cheers3 -
We are a small size product based company. There was a change in management a year back and the new management decided to fire the entire engineering team one by one. I was hired as full time back-end developer (C++). Just after I joined they removed the last 2 engineers from the previous regime and handed over devops and Python API development to me as well.
There was no documentation for the main product which was a sophisticated piece of software. There were no comments in the code as well. I had to go through line by line (roughly 100,000 lines of code).
Then they decide to hire more devs.Turned out to be false hope. They hired interns who had no programming knowledge.
Now they got two clients who are interested in using the service. They lured them using empty promises. The product is not stable. The cloud infrastructure is not at all ready. The APIs are a mess. I don't know which one to work on.
Worst part is that there is no other technical person in the office.
I'm thinking about quitting now. I don't know why I haven't already.😖😖4 -
Situation: My lead dev (read as in, my employee that has the lead developer position, not my superior) is complaining about certain decisions being made in regards to a rather large project that has been stagnated by executive political bullshit.
Me: let them fuck themselves over, it is their decision to have a voice on this and we are not the ones developing it, merely managing the resources.
Him: Well they do not know what they are asking! everyone is wanting to have an opinion! a voice!!!
Me: and by their own volition they will fuck themselves over and I have the proper documentation to show everyone that if the project is delayed, it will be by popular vote. I have already spoke to our VP to let him know that we are not taking part in their decision planning process, that we provide the necessary feedback, they get to do with it what they want regarding their decisions.
Him: they are being really stupid and inconsiderate
Me: they are indeed, but as long as I show that you, me, and the rest of the team provided input, they disregarded it and went with their decision, then then the fault is on them, not you or our team. Let them fuck themselves over, I have the documentation needed to secure our asses, I record every conversation and I have every email saved. Really, if they don't want to listen to you they will not be able to point the issues that will inevitably rise back to you or us.
Him: .... you are evil
Me: fuck with me team see what happens. Their face and reaction is what makes me get a hard on after the fact.
Ain't no one touching my team.10 -
I’ve learned JavaScript in 2012, and after a few years of C++, C, Java and Python, I am seriously coming back to js. And oooh boi, things have changed. Back in the day 😅, jquery was the coolest lib ever, Nodejs was a new wild beast (v0.7.0). Kids these days don’t really how lucky they are.7
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WHAT FUCKING PAYMENT PROVIDER SENDS ALL THEIR TECHNICAL STAFF ON VACATION?!?!?
Leaving customer service to tell me to "wait until they get back... In three weeks"
Unbelievable, I'm actually thinking there are laws and regulations about this if you are providing money handling services, but the sheer stupidity in itself!!2 -
recently people have been worried about what people were going to say I.e "no hate" , don't hold back!
In devrant we only mean light hearted banter if we are pissed we don't want to hurt you we are pissed at a thing and not directly at you. Not that I speak for dfox or trogus but I'm sure that's what they are going for, and it's what ive seen!
We are nice here... This isn't YouTube , it's a credit to devs we are nice people. Hell it isn't stack overflow!
Also I'm brutally honest at times but I love you really.10 -
People on dating apps say they are very pissed off and frustrated when they’re ghosted.
As a developer you get eager calls from recruiters talking for hours. They say I’ll catch up with you first thing in the morning. An HR manager says I’ll get back to you in 14 hours (in 14 hours?? very precise). Even you get a contract offer from a manager who is rapidly contacts and convinces you.
Than you hear nothing, you are left on read.
“Professionals” communicate in that way. They are also getting paid whilst taking your time. What can you say to random people behind nicknames?
I don’t know what I would feel if they get back and I’m zombied. I really feel like unmatching meh.8 -
Episode 2 of this rant: https://devrant.io/rants/851636/...
PM went to meet with the provider and came back, so I had a talk with the PM and it went like this:
Me: so how did the meeting go? Hope they corporate with you
PM: *in a sarcastic voice* Bro, you need be a good dev, they told me only a good dev can implement Master Card API calls, and its all in the docs. That's all they told me, so you should know how the meeting went
Me: *there is no wifi in jail, there is no wifi in jail, there is no wifi in jail, there is no wifi in jail* Fine bro, I'll go back to school and come back after 12 years.
Seriously when I send the provider the request and the body and all they tell me is: You have an error, Id must be unique but they fail to point out the exact error or at least send me a valid ID to test, how does this make me the bad dev and him the genius that can run Apple, Google, MS all together at once!
What is even worse, when I called the provider he told me: Man transaction ID must always be unique, how could you not know this, how is Mastercard supposed to differentiate between transactions!!
But hey, no one told me transaction id must be unique, primary keys are never unique, like DUH!10 -
A manager, a mechanical engineer, and software analyst are driving back from convention through the mountains. Suddenly, as they crest a hill, the brakes on the car go out and they fly careening down the mountain. After scraping against numerous guardrails, they come to a stop in the ditch. Everyone gets out of the car to assess the damage.
The manager says, "Let's form a group to collaborate ideas on how we can solve this issue."
The mechanical engineer suggests, "We should disassemble the car and analyze each part for failure."
The software analyst says, "Let's push it back up the hill and see if it does it again."1 -
fucking hosting company...
Just got a ticket back explaining that "the settings you want to make to your mysql database aren't possible with our hosting products". While they state in their FAQ that there are no restrictions applied. (We are talking about to possibility of using JOIN here!)
Ducking fuck.11 -
What in the unholy fuck is going on with the world!!
I get how our personal lives and data are bloody good at being used against us and tracking our behaviours but fuck Facebook won't let "good enough" alone and are coming back out with a new way to pay for our most sensitive data. Everything on your phone!
What more could they possibly want from knowing what,where,who,why,when, and probably even how we are shitting in a back ally besides controlling the masses
- no I'm not a privacy nut, just a concerned citizen -
https://theverge.com/2019/6/...3 -
1. high severity production incident was asked to look into at the end of the day.
2. needed fix in ui.
3. fixed and deployed in 1 hour.
4. issue remained. debugging began.
5. gave up at 1 AM and went to sleep.
6. woke up at 6 and after debugging for 2 hours, identified to be a back end issue.
7. worked with back end team for the fix, and 6 hours and 3 deployments later, it worked.
8. third party vendor reported they are still not receiving one parameter from us.
9. back end team realised they forgot to ask ui to send another parameter.
10. added the parameter in ui, redeployed ui.
11. build and deployment tool broke down. got it fixed. delay of 1.5 hours.
12. finally things are in place. total time 26 hours.
13. found half bottle of vodka, leftover from last weekend. *Priceless*1 -
Had no internet for hours.
Called the support.
"We will fix it!" they said and they actually did. So maybe there are competent people working there as well???
No. Of course not.
Two hours later I receive a call from them. "It was not our fault. There was an update so we had to plug the cables back into the right ports."
Software update
Physical connections
Wat5 -
DO NOT be afraid to argue with people. It doesnt matter who they are. Senior engineers, tech leads, delivery managers, if you know something is wrong make it heard. I made a point of telling my Project Manager that the current project is the worst ive ever seen. The technology is awful and we all hate the development. They need to know this stuff. And if they come to you with a deadline that you dont think you can make, say it then and there. Then they cant come back and say why isnt this done. Basically dont just do as youre told. If we needed that we would get robots to do our job. We need people who think and have opinions and make those opinions heard at the appropriate level.2
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So we are implementing a big and very complete localization management system on my company. The system has great features, indeed, but:
1. We cannot use the browser back button, because it is js and it appears no one cared about it (I am not a js Dev, but you can UAE the back button on my site that has js);
2. It is very customizable, but not intuitive. So you have one million options and you never know where to change what you need;
3. It has a save button everywhere, but most options are saved automatically, so you never know when you need to save. Actually, people from the webapp company use the save button as refresh, once we cannot use the browser refresh button;
4. Combo boxes load the elements while you scroll them, so to scroll to the bottom, you need to keep scrolling several times, waiting it to load the elements;
5. It does not allow you to open more than one tab of it at the same time. So if you need to see more than one information from different items, you need to navigate and wait the loading times to see what you need;
6. Emails are not sent in a different thread. So each action that send emails you need to keep waiting until the emails are sent (sometimes there are several emails sent in one action) to continue using it;
7. They not only store and send back your password by email if you loose it, but, as admin, if I click the button to send the user password to him/her, it keeps a copy of the email with the user password in my sent items;
8. To be able to send emails (they are really necessary), I need to include my SMTP info with login and password. So they have not only the system password saved, but everyone email login and password as well.
I am sure there is more, but I can't remember for now, and we are still trying to figure it out how to back our data, as it appears the only possible backup is their own.5 -
I waited 8 years for cyberpunk 2077. I also bought the most expensive pc of my life including 34inch ultra wide monitor.
But at the last moment I got fucked by AMD. The 5900x that I ordered was dead on arrival and went back for replacement. But they don't have any stock to replacement. So I am fucking waiting for cpu. They are not providing any information on the stock.
I am getting depressed day by day.21 -
Two of them, both are not very extrem.
Positive one first:
Meetings were usually not dead serious (unless there was a problem), everyone just joked around a little, made their actual points and got back to work.
Now the other one:
A client's QA staff commented "this bug is still occuring" on 5 tickets, without checking if they ever deployed the new release candidate.
They didn't deploy the new RC, so of course, the bugs couldn't have been fixed on their side.2 -
Lesson I learnt the hard way today: ticket every fucking task (including admin) to:
A. Cover your arse (if the tickets are not ready because they haven't given us enough information, push back on it before committing too much effort to doing it)
B. Better deliverable (what you output will probably be better quality because you worked out the requirements upfront + you know the audience)
C. You have something to show management when they want to try and overwork you some more4 -
JavaScript is the ugly girl freshman year with glasses and acne. Typescript is the beautiful women she became senior year and won prom queen. Hate on JavaScript all you want because it was a language written in 2 weeks but the new releases with es6 and now typescript are a far cry from the js people were written back in the day. The times they are a changing -Bob Dylan.13
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"We don't use a VCS like git, what are you opinions on this?" This is great in my opinion. You get to see some people sheepishly agree and say it's fine and try back it up, or people put valid points why they think it's wrong. You can start to gauge a person's personality after a few of those kinds of questions.4
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I've talked in past rants about how marketing loves showing off features to customers that are still in Beta to give us devs more pressure to finish them earlier, but it really just ends up screwing up our schedule since we have to push back on other features.
We had warned them not to do so for a series of reasons. But this time, this time their bad practices has come back to bite them in their butts.
They've been bragging all over to customers about this API integration we've been developing. They caught a reasonable amount of customers whose main reason for hopping in with us was this API integration. We finished the code on time, and submitted to the API provider for them to revise our "app". It's been a long back-and-forth conversation clarifying purposes and trying to fix tiny details and, of course, the providers' emails take almost a week to come back. We're waayy past the deadline marketing had promised customers, and they know they can't really blame the devs.
Sucks to lose these customers, but it feels so good to show these marketing pricks a lesson.2 -
SQL Rule 1. Always assume there are external processes that might affect your data. (for instance, triggers).
SQL Rule 2. In Denormalised data, never execute logic on dependant table values, always copy from the parent.
SQL Rule 3. When Denormalised data schemas are created the DBA knows what they are doing.
SQL Rule 3.1. If DBA knows what they is doing then according to Rule 1 there is no problem with adding in some triggers to maintain data clones as they are created.
SQL Rule 4. If you don't like or agree with triggers, deal with it. They are a first class tool in a first class RDBMS. In a multi-app or service environment there may be many other external processes massaging your data
SQL Rule 5. If all previous rules are not broken and the system has been running efficiently for many years DO NOT complain that there are triggers in the database that are doing and have been doing the same process that you just butchered (by violating Rule 1 and 2) in your makeshift "hello world, look what I can do from my phone" angular BS when the rest of the users are still relying on the existing runtime app.
SQL Rule 6. If you turn my triggers off, you sure as hell better turn them back on!1 -
That horrible feeling that you're holding the team back as a junior dev.
What took me two days of struggle, it took the senior dev a glance to solve the issue.
Literately took them less than 10seconds to complete the task which I spent two days both at work and after work of debugging and research to try and solve.
Why are they paying me to work here.9 -
This is worst. I was asking for resource for my team from months and finally they gave me a senior dev and I was not part his hiring process. I mean no disrespect to any developer. Some are smart , some are average and some are worst but that is their choice or they are made like that and can’t chahe themselves. All I am asking them to take back resources because adding him my work went from double to triple because I have to tell him everything and still he will make mistakes and I have to correct them.6
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Not here to disturb y'all , but am a little sad because our cute little boy honey has wandered somewhere and hasn't come back for last 2 days. :'(
I don't know what to do, we searched the whole area nearby and there are no signs of him. We have also alerted a few neighbors who aren't bad to animals.
But i guess it's his time to go out. We always had many cats , and we live on the topmost floor, so cats usually wander over to different terraces and come back after a few hours. But there is always a day, when they go away, nd never comes back.usually the female cats return, with stomach full of babies, but the boys are full Roadies, king of some random place
Its just my heart says he hasn't gone forever. He is a super dumb, and not very much of a bold boy. I think he fell somewhere in an empty home,and couldn't find his way back. ;_;10 -
I’ve been interviewing with a startup for a Frontend Engineer role. In the interview they said they didn’t have a designer, that their founder and other devs do the design work. I thought “ok so they are still putting something together and don’t care much if the UI is crappy”, and still proceeded with it. I do the take-home test, it took a lot more than the 1-2 hours they said it should take (these estimates never seem realistic), I thought I did a pretty good job and send it back to them. I then got an email back from one of the founders, they really liked the code and my approach, but the UX was not good enough. He asked if I would be willing to iterate on it if given some direction? The direction: design your own version of our product. I refused. I thought this was a developer position, not a designer position.7
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After two weeks with Ubuntu - I'm done with this. I'm going back to Windows.
Why? Well, it fixes some Windows problems, but at the same time new ones are popping and they are even bloody worse.10 -
When I realized my job isn't to code, it is to hack for hacks.
As smart developers our job is to be accountable to non-technical product management types who care nothing for elegant system design or DRY code. They expect features get done fast and "technically complete." They use terms like "minimum viable product (MVP)" to imply we'll go back and improve things like refactoring and tech debt later.
They will not. Most likely they won't even be around. Producers and scrumlords have the highest turnover rate of any role on a team. By design they get bored or frustrated easily and are constantly looking for greener pastures. Many people in self-proclaimed "non-technical" roles like this never had the patience and attention span to learn a real vocation, and they've discovered a career path that doesn't require one.
These are our masters. As developers, we will answer to them forever and always.1 -
Client comes to me.
Client: So my business is colour matching, people visit me and I help match outfits they should wear that works with their hair and eye colour etc.
Me: Ok... and?
Client: Well. I'd like to do this online, someone sends a photo in and I assess it and send them a colour palette back.
Me: Right... How are you going to calibrate this?
Client: What do you mean?
Me: Well, it's a nigh on impossible task to ensure the exact tones and hues they send you in their photo to what you see, and likewise what you send back might look very different based on their brightness and contrast. Colour science is actually quite hard.
Client: But I don't understand they just send a picture right?
Me: Yeah, they can send one, but are you going to have a consistent baseline for your laptop, can you guarantee the brightness is at the same level each and every time?
Client: No... Why would that matter?
Me: I'm bored now, I'm not gonna take this project. -
older clients are returning with my old projects and asking for improvements, I did buy a few very shitty scripts from the internet/ and used one of my friends custom php cms for the other client because I REALLY needed money and they needed the projects yesterday.
Now I'm looking at the code and can't start working because of how messy it all is, I want to remake it all with a good framework and system, but it would take too much time (and they want it fast) and they wouldn't want to pay for the improvements because what they have now works..
I guess the shit you throw out when you're younger does come flying back like a boomerang..3 -
In my three years experience so far I can honestly say that 100% of the developers I've worked with are narrow sighted with regards to how they develop.
As in, they lack the capacity to anticipate multiple scenarios.
They code with one unique scenario in mind and their work ends up not passing tests or generates bugs in production.
Not to say I'm the best at foreseeing every possible scenario, but I at least TRY to anticipate and test my code as much as possible to identify problems and edge cases.
I usually take much more time to complete tasks than my colleagues, but my work usually passes tests and comes back bug free. Whereas my colleagues get applauded for completing tasks quickly but end up spending lots of time fixing up after themselves when tests fail or bugs appear.
Probably more time wasted than if they had done the job correctly from the start. Yet they're considered to be effecient devs because they work "fast".
Frustrating...7 -
As a freelancer I get side requests from bigger development companies from time to time that don't have the time or capacity to deal with it themselves.
So usually the employees are pretty friendly but they do not like to read any of the documentation I send with the code. They call me up with stupid questions that are usually answered in the documentation.
I had sent them everything they had requested last Thursday so they called me on Friday to ask the usual stupid question. However, this time I had beforehand decided to have some fun! I told them I had to leave for the weekend and to call me back on Monday. Of course they called me during the weekend, but I didn't answer. So they called me today.
What I had done before handing it all in was I had named the methods that I wrote illogically, while stating and explaining the whole situation in the documentation extra clearly.
So I answered the call today and the first thing they did was apologize. Since I didn't answer their calls during the weekend they finally realized that the best way to go is reading the documentation instead of calling me all the time. They were freaked out at first because they thought there was something completely wrong with the code and they had to tell their client that the deadline had to be pushed back.
We are all good now :)6 -
One of the few good things dell ever made are it's monitors.
They must be good. People never fucking throw them away. Back when I did repairs I came across *so* many customers who just stocked monitors away like squirrels preparing for the god damn ice age. Three dell monitors here. Five there. Every where a monitor. Old McDonald had dell farm, E, I, E, I, O.6 -
I am at Lenovo service center to bring back my laptop after replace of motherboard (they replaced because card reader not working). Ohh. I checked again and it's not yet working (illiterate technician)...
.
..
Waiting for 1 hour..
..
Meanwhile I see they are outsourcing their screen , monitor,scanner etc. From dell,acer... Ohh how can they prove they are better...
.
.
.
.
Okay!now hit me hard a person came here for service and without even booting they concluded the windows inside laptop is pirated🤔😌2 -
Got my first rejection after my first job interview via e-Mail today. It was about a local webhosting company.
I feel a little bit sad about it, but I am glad that I have made this experience with them and hope that I can use this experience to better myself in future job interviews.
What bothers me the most is that they told me in the mail that they are sad to send that rejection mail to a friendly and warm person like me, but they do not give a clean explanation why they had to reject me.
Was it because of someone better than me? Am I not qualified enough? What is the reason ffs?
I have send them a mail back mentioning that I am thankful for the conversation we have had, but also asking for the reason of the rejection.
I do not think that they will reply me back, but I hope they will.5 -
Currently our companies website is being attacked and we're getting a 500 error and the FTP servers are down. Everyone is panicking. Little do they know that I just rebooted the server and already sent out a notice of this happening and will be back online. People are chanting for my death outside my cubical with fire and pitch forks. HURRY UP AND FINISH REBOOTING SERVER!!!1!!2
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Need to go old school again, go back to hosting their own servers and peer to peer mesh networks. Eliminate the shackles of big tech... Eliminate the control and power they have over you. The only reason they are used is the idea of simplicity and low entry cost. But you pay for that later, when they deem you to be a competition, or don’t align with their goals.8
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When someone is presenting their code for aspects of a terribly made page.
They know you are proficient in 6 different languages, and then still ask "is it too hard for you".
Holding back my comments, just sitting down and smiling inside.1 -
A puzzle, just for fun.
Two friends, (a)lice and (b)ob are communicating through a channel encrypted with random numbers XOR'd together, like so:
keyA = randint(1024, 1024**2)
keyB = randint(1024, 1024**2)
msg = randint(1024, 1024**2)
You, an interloper, have watched all these communications, siphoning the packets as they went.
When alice sends a message to bob's mailbox, she does it like so:
mailBoxB = keyA^msg
Bob's mailbox receives the mail automatically, and applies his own key, sending it back to alice's mailbox:
mailBoxA = keyB^mailBoxB
Next, Alice's mailbox notices the message, and automatically removes her key and sends it back to bob's mailbox. All of this, the first message, the second, and the third, happens in milliseconds, the back and forth.
mailBoxB2 = mailBoxA^keyA
Finally, bob's mailbox removes his key, and deposits the now unencrypted message in his box, for him to read in the morning:
mailBoxBFinal = mailBoxB2^keyB
As as a spy, you know the first packet sent to bob, had a value of 589505.
The packet bob sent back to alice, after applying his key, has a value of 326166
The message sent *back* to bob after alice removed *her* key, had a value of:
576941
What are the values of keyA, keyB, and what is the value of the msg?4 -
This happen to me once when I was a young kid walking home from school.
There were two other guys with me, older than me. They were talking to each other about programming languages. I have been programming from a very young age so I knew a lot about programming and I knew a few languages back then, but they were taking about Java, a language which I wasn't into yet back then, so I just listened for a while to what they had to say.
The first guy told the other, "You know I'm great at Java." The other guy responded "I can do anything in Java." Then I said as a joke "Oh, can you do hello world?". The guy said "Hello what? What do you mean?" The other guy said. "Is that a retro game?" I just laughed. Then I told them to go learn how to output text in Java.
A bit of current history about these guys:
The first now works in C# for a quiz test company, he never learned Java or languages other than C#. The second one owns and works at a scrapyard. They are both great guys, but they like to brag.3 -
Just came back from a Dev event and it was so refreshing knowing that I have similar knowledge as some presenters and that almost anybody knows wtf they are doing 😂😂
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!dev
@dfox and @trogus I have to say I'm very impressed with the quality of the stickers I got back in October. They have been enduring near daily use from taking my laptop in and out of my backpack to dealing with my sweaty palms on the keyboard deck. No discoloration at all.
Appreciate you guys and this platform you are cultivating! Thanks again.11 -
I don't know if I should cry or laugh...
Our CMS is a CMS as a Service. So, our providers, for me they all suck, everytime they make a development, everything breaks.
Today's flash news?
Well, basically any page containing some user-made dynamic objects are **empty**
But not only on our site, on their whole network of clients that use their CMS. Everything is broken.
They release new features (I should call them bugs rather) every week, and yesterday's update concerned these pages.
And for the record, they don't test. They wait that we come back and complain to see if their shitty development worked or did not.
This CMS is even worse than your first project in HTML - I mean, your first word document on your mama's computer when you were 3.
Seriously. What kind of non-quality is this?8 -
It’s throw back Thursday folks...
Today’s post sets us back to a time long before the internet. Before C ... from the days of FORTRAN.. COBOL .. and LISP... How was info not taught in classes and published in large books shared???? Well it’s was journals like these, sent out monthly and quarterly for some. They would publish their findings to these type “magazines” but extremely technical.
This is one of the oldest editions have. Trying to collect them.
I believe in Knuths TAOCP, he references the first article of this edition... I’ve seen that article referenced in one of my books but i forgot which book.. pretty sure TAOCP.. anyway..
Just a fun throw back. Btw... just because it’s from 59’ doesn’t mean the information is irrelevant.. the information is facts the equations are true.12 -
*downloads YouTube videos by ssyoutube.com and convyoutube.com
*tries YouTube Go
*downloads some videos by YouTube Go
*They are downloaded with captions
*Undecided
*YouTube Go randomly tries to redownload the videos
*thinking about come back to ssyoutube.com and convyoutube.com5 -
When a two programmers meet in public and they start to talk loud
Then.....
You notice people look like (o_o) and watching
And a sound from the back saying "what are you saying?"3 -
Me: Why are we spending time building reports for Support? AFAIK they never read or use them.
Boss: Seems they expect you to do it.
Me: Then what exactly are they supposed to be doing? All the issues seem to just escalate back to us.... We should just make sure issues never get into PROD
Boss: I agree, they're always firefighting... we gave them more funding so eventually they should catch up **Me: I highly doubt it, you should just stop hiring monkeys** esp. if we prevent PROD issues.
Me: Yea... we should prevent production issues because someone always has to pay off the (technical) debt and interest rates in PROD are very high6 -
Ok so we just signed a new client with some "artificial intelligence" back-end...
To authenticate with their back end, they developed a FU**ING GET REQUEST so the username and password are passed in the URL.
Then we get a token that we pass in FU**ING GET REQUESTS to communicate with their "artificial intelligence enhanced" back end.
I can't even. I just can't.5 -
So i recently started a new Instagram account with new email ID apart from the personal Instagram account which has my friends from Facebook and even from highschool.
The new account was supposed to be a secret, part of an experiment I'm doing with my life choices. And there i only follow people that i look up to. I'm not expecting anyone from real life to follow me their and i prefer if they don't.
Nobody was supposed to know about this new account other than me. But guess what, it seems this account is being advertised to my friends from other account and some of them are following this new account. I'm 99.9% sure they are following just to get a follow back.
I'm feeling shitty about this, but i ain't gonna follow them back. If i need to see their story and photos, I'd get back on my personal account.
Guess I'll have to suck it up and be okay with fact that those "friends" will be seeing my vulnerable side.6 -
I got my first gig as an android developer a couple of months back.
Today, my changes got merged into candidate, soon to be released.
Although they are mostly bug fixes, I feel proud that code written by me will be rolled out to 400000 users. :')3 -
Current mood:
That irksome moment when you want to rant and vent about a particular workplace incident but wonder if your coworkers are on devrant too.
And they certainly might figure out no matter how cryptic you are.
*puts mask back on*2 -
Not dev but I need to get it off my chest, first day back from holiday and I'm already stressed.
Today my company's travel agency made a mistake in my first name when booking me a flight. Once I received the itinerary and noticed the mistake I sent an email telling them and politely asking to have it fixed. They said they'd sort it out urgently.
~4 hours later
They changed my *last name* and now both first and last names are spelled incorrectly..
Seriously, how incompetent does one have to be to mess the very thing they were told to double check. -
CTO s shouldn't write software once there are more than 50 devs in the company. They shouldn't make tech decisions. It is time for you to back off and help with more important things. We really need you to get process nailed down. We really need you to help us understand business better. Not writing code.1
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On New Year's Eve a few years back I was around 21/22 and my friends were anywhere between 20/25.
My best friend has a big house so he offered to host it there (as every year pretty much), so we all agreed to do dinner and party after.
We decided to go with barbecue, and we all brought a few things.
Without my knowledge, they are all pretty much gamers and also decided to bring their laptops and even towers to play during the whole day and night.
The result was me "alone" cooking with the dad of a female friend (whose wife died a few years back and offered to help since he would be pretty much alone or with some other family members, not sure).
Once we finished cooking and went on to calling them, no one came to eat because "they were finishing just one more game", and eventually the dad yelled at them and left, I just went eating by myself, and they all showed up a few minutes later looking like 5 year olds when dads scream at them.
I can pretty much say that was the weirdest thing ever, but they did learn because never again they did the same!8 -
Intel is dying right now tbh. I hope the can get back on their feet but as of right now, chaos. They have had multiple ceo changes within 1 year and their current is a horrible leader. They have been really wasteful with their money (like buying McAfee...) And the inly reason they are leading in the CPU market, Tick Tock, is failing. It used to be Process - Architecture. Now intel has announced they are not changing the process for 8th gen, currently it's Process - Architecture - Optimize - Optimize - Optimize. Which is not good. It has been leaked that Intel is currently just hoping for AMD Ryzen to fail, let's face it, Ryzen seems really promising and might be the comeback AMD needs.
TLDR; Intel is a one trick pony and their one trick is failing. They have been really wasteful with their money and their current hope is that Ryzen fails.
I have an Intel CPU in my system and i find them to be better than AMD, but the tables might turn.7 -
So 4 months back I agreed to build a website for one of my relatives. In the beginning while discussing about the site they told me that will make the contents and photos that will go to the respective pages. I kept on reminding them about the contents and now four months have passed and I still have no contents and photos. Now they are pressuring me to complete the website soon. Don't they understand that I'm waiting for the f****** contents?! 😠 I kept on reminding them for four f****** months! And they think that I AM the one who is slow! .. FOUR f****** months for one website!8
-
Got my laptop back from SquareTrade today. This is after a month, 2 weeks of which they gave no status updates.
Per their "Repair Summary":
Reported issue: Power/Charging port
Actions: Repaired
Parts repaired/replaced: None. OS reloaded
(Note this was originally a Windows 10/Gentoo setup)
WTF??? I thought the extra M2 SSD they included might have been the drive they had replaced, but nope. Both are blank (one W8/what the computer originally came with, the other W10).
I'm at a loss right now.1 -
When I became a dev my parents said: "it's not rocket science, or chemistry or anything good, but at least it's not stressful, or dangerous and we can get free tech support. I hope you are able to pay your own bills and find rent"
A few years, a degree and finding a supportive woman who is now my wife and and I make 4 time as much as my parents make now they want me to move back so they can get their tech support and see my wife I guess she is more social than I am -
Just graduated in CS.
All jobs required experience in stuff I never seen/heard before (back then I didn’t know most job listings were copy pasted by people who knew less than me).
I felt so inadequate that I replied to a job offer as a seller as they asked only fluency in 2 foreign languages.
The company owner during the interview looked at me and told me I needed to look elsewhere, that mine was a good resume and then he dropped this:
“I can see you are a good guy, but for this job I need an asshole”
Back then it was very hard for me but now I understand10 -
So they are back, wanting another quick PR approved.
The PR:
```
let isDisabled = switch quantity > 0 {
| true =>
switch value !== "" {
| true => false
| false =>
switch inputStatus {
| Valid =>
switch inputData {
| Ok(a) => a !== 0.0 ? false : true
| Error(_) => true
}
| _ => true
}
}
| false => true
}
```6 -
I hate moving
But moving back in with your parents is even worse
Even worse when your parents are hoarders and so you get to move back into a room where you then get to clear out random shit that isn't yours. And try to convince your parents to throw out a dresser that only 3/8 drawers work in it but they want to keep it.
*Sighs*8 -
I started watching Silicon Valley some days back. Just finished season-1. I'm fucking sad and pissed off right now... No, don't get me wrong...Silicon Valley is good. I loved it.
Problem is, there is an Indian YouTube series called TVF Pitchers which had almost same story as silicon valley. I loved that series, when I watched it in 2015, after completing that I really was very impressive with the channel because of the originality and very off-the-track plot. Now after watching Silicon valley, I'm fucking sad... THEY JUST FUCKING COPY PASTED IT. yeah, some people with their "courtroom skills" will tell me that no it was different story... Fuck you! It was a copy and that's it. They removed Gilfoyle character and there was no product information in entire series... That was the biggest change in it. But overall it was a copy... A fucking copy.
The problem is they themselves, in their other videos, make fun of our movies/songs because of them being copied... Now, they are fucking doing it on their own.
I know it's not much related to devRant. Sorry about that.
Some times back, I joined a startup and they pitched in their idea as if they created it on their own... Later I found out that the same idea is running in a successful Palo Alto based company. And just like TVF Pitchers, they also used to make fun of an Indian e-commerce startup (a big one) because it was a copy of Amazon... THEN WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU!!!
I don't know, but for some reason I just fucking hate it. Everybody here is busy copy fucking pasting US. They laugh at others, but they are also same... I'm going through Peter Theil's Zero to One.. and the book is making much more sense to me now.8 -
On the beginning of a project I'm not yet ( 😒 ) taking part of I questioned the use of firebase because I understood the client was gonna ask for the web app to be hosted on their servers lately, but people told me not to worry.
Today... Only 2 fucking months later they are asking for the specifications/technologies used so they can prepare their server to host it and I was laughing my ass out internally while saying to my boss:
Well, looks like you are gonna need to rewrite huge parts and probably write a back end from scratch if you are gonna use postgresql.
Lol, why do people never listen to me? This is becoming ridiculous.... -
I have a big problem guys. I am so stressed out that i have been crying for the past few hours. I joined this company as a fresher 2 years back by signing a bond that i'll have to pay them if I leave the company. The bond is going to be over on 25th Nov,2023. They extended the bond by 3 months. I was a desperate kid back then who had pressure from family. Now the situation is that i have performed well throughout my working period. They are heavily underpaying me. Now i have 2.5 years of experience but freshers are earning more than me now. They had been giving me work every now and then. Now they have made me the lead of a new team where i have to build the world's most useless framework that does not even make any sense. The most suitable developer who was also my senior refused to join the team because he knew how useless the work is and is going to take the troll on him. Now I have to do it.
My manager said that you are going to do this and the deadline is 3 months. Which is not even feasible. This is utterly stupid. It's a waste of time. I am so fucking stressed out because of this and how much freshers(interns whom i trained) are earning more than me.
I have a notice period of 3 months. No companies are willing to hire because of this notice period.
If I resign now, i have to pay them 75k rupees and plus I have to eventually work for 3 months. I can't do this. What to do in this situation.
I am trapped.62 -
Never forget how it feels to be new and overwhelmed. For every question that you ask, remember that you should eventually pay that back by answering one for someone newer than you.
I think a lot of times, once developers get enough experience, it's all too easy to judge or make fun of those who are new for something they don't know. Remember that you were there once and lend a non-judgmental helping hand!3 -
1 Week ago I took down the development version of an internal demo, leaving only the prod one (temporary space issue). Colleagues were told n+15 times via email, face to face, comments on tickets etc. The prod one has also been live for weeks, and again, they were told when it went up.
This just happened:
Colleague 1: practiseSafeHex can you help me, the demo doesn't seem to be working.
Me: *logs in*, *click around* ... seems fine dude. Are you using the correct URL: <prod-url>.
Colleague 1: let me try again and see.
Colleague 2: practiseSafeHex i'm with Colleague 1, were trying to use the demo, and its not working. Can you have a look, we need it.
Me: I just told him, its fine, I think you have the wrong URL <prod-url>. Can you try again.
Colleague 2: No I have the right one, can you check it.
Me: *does nothing*, yep i've had a look at it, can you try again: <prod-url>.
Colleague 2: Ah its back now, cheers.
They are with a customer now, so I won't say anything, when they get back, one of them is being castrated. -
Nothing distracts me more than people eating in an otherwise quiet office. It makes me so livid that i usually leave the room for a coffee refill or bathroom break and hope they are done by the time I'm back.
I can code while holding a conversation, I barely even notice when people do phone calls or skype meetings next to me, but hearing people chew and breathe through their nose while smelling their lunch just annihilates me.5 -
Failed my Triplebyte interview because even though they claim they are testing for "general programming knowledge" basically everything had to do with web front-end and back-end.
Yay.2 -
Oh god... technical decisions should be taken by people who actually know what they are doing and even so still counter-checked and not followed blindly.
I am currently working in a company that wasted millions by trying to implement micro-services where they don't belong and didn't step back when they realize it was a mistake
(protip: micro-services usually don't belong in most places).
Now we're dealing with the sunken costs fallacy and I am seriously believing that the company is going bust in a few months. Let's wait and see. -
had an interview at a place that went good at the technical part but I didn't do great at their 'abstract' questions. the guys interviewing were complete stone faced as well, no personality, pretty sure I wouldn't have liked working there anyways. a few years later and they are still looking for people. the recruiter rings up and I said I wouldn't want to re-interview unless the process had changed. he guaranteed me it had. so I went back in and it was exactly the same. exactly the same technical questions, followed by more abstract questions. different guys but same no-personalities. never going back
-
its day 4 of updating documentation and consolidating data.
The webclient has broken on average 4 times a day.
The database took 20+ seconds on updating a password entry.
I explained to my boss the real cost of interrupting my attention with these pauses. I figure it's caused my productivity to go from record high last week to being literally losing about 4 hours a day lost, plus extra time in having to go back through and verify things worked.
The technicians and developers who are working on fixing the database system are apparently quitting left right and center; their company acquired it awhile back, so they don't actually have native developers on it. Yet they still are pushing out new integration features rather than fixing anything.
Yesterday, one of the other people on the documentation project lost half a days work due to the angular updating the local cache, but it never reaching the backend. He came back from lunch, reopened his browser, and all his work was gone. (at least thats what we think happened). So we are hard resetting the program every 10 minutes or so just to make sure it is updating the backend.
The good news is that when it is done, we theoretically will be able to use this to cut back onboarding time and update times by about half, and it'll mean our new nano-server deployment project should be able to spin out with standards that can be referenced properly by everyone, not just the guy with the powershell script that he tinkered with for a particular project and never told anyone else what he did.
Theoretically. -
There’s literally poor people dying of COVID because they can’t get beds and my bosses are sharing shitposts on LinkedIn about fun “coming back to work games”3
-
I want you all to think back on how "transparent" and "helpful" everyone was to you when you were useful to the company.
And then as soon as you were gone, did they just complain and say something like "how could fullstackclown leave us??!?!?!"
I swear, the last call I was on, I literally heard the phrase "we are such a good team, we think up great MVP products and you guys execute so well"
Let me translate: "we are whimsical fucksticks and you are our slaves to implement it because we ourselves are too incompetent to do it"
Well no more.
Fucking tools, all of them, everyone just wants to use us to get ahead. No competence, no self-understanding, just encapsulate the "IT" or "tEcHiE" people to some department - doesn't even have to even be near us, they can be from any geographic location; they can just be replaced at a moment's notice!
Yeah, well fuck you, because we're growing in skill and understanding, and fighting against you.
Fucking 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡s
The unionized revolution of software developer is coming soon.2 -
Objective-C is an awful programming language that nobody should ever use for anything.
Also you dont know how important unit tests are until you have to deliver an enterprise level application without them.
Biggest one Ive learned recently, managers will promise you the earth to keep you around as long as possible, and they will go back on every promise and call it a "change in priority" -
These are probably stupid questions but I have to ask.
So does it usually take long for people to get back with you after you apply (if they were to be interested)
And are contracting positions worth looking into as well for someone trying to build professional experience?8 -
I am now sitting in my apartment lobby after rushing home this morning because of a FedEx Delivery.
They said they can't get access to the building then how the fuck did this FedEx package get in between when I got back and when I came down?
Now they said there are different trucks... And my service could come later today.
It wasn't even supposed to come today but I guess maybe that's good since I took today off anyway...
Now I'm just stake out here all day and if it's not here..... Im going to aim to make FedEx the next Facebook or Panama Paper PR crisis -
Right,i consider myself a pretty damn good dev... I can back up everything I say to prove that I'm right on not lying to clients
But I see all these devs who do lie... Who withold data from clients cause it's not great.
And I go to clients and prove that they are lying not doing it right.
But I know saying to them... Oi your current devs are shit fire them ... Isn't a good way to get them as a client
Me and my company are open and honest ... we go all out on all of our projects. I work nonstop. It is seriously baffling the kind of developers are out there and how bad they can be I'm... Seriously just.... Urgh 😖
How should I go about talking to clients without going ... Fire them quick or saying that in a ... More humble respectful way...
I need more clients ... To survive and I don't mind coming across as a dick as long as they understand what's going on and that they are people ripped off by these asshole devs5 -
Using devrant on windows phone. Windows phones are so so so nice. Why microsoft did you stop windows phones. They are the best OS and greatest experience. Bring back windows phone please.11
-
Someone around here once said that they believe that Rust compiler errors are generated by first sending the compiler noise to some dude in India and then they parse the errors and send them back to the compiler.
This was not a nod against our friends from the land of India, but instead, I think, a praise.
Thus I would like to add a request to the rust devs to see if they could include more "trademark Indian" sassy remarks in the messages that the compiler generates. But I am afraid that they think I am being racist or something.
For reference: My Indian friends are all beyond sassy in the way they clap back at mfkers when having friendly arguments, I have been left with a "well, damn" in multiple occasions because I am incapable of reaching that level of sass myself.12 -
My current boss.. and CTO.. both are great & really laid back, they don't fuss about smoke breaks and are both keeping me in line so that I don't do much overtime (I am a freak for fixing stuff that gets easily consumed by the code)..
-
Colleagues who don't think about what they are coding... So I end up going back over their code, fixing bugs, reducing a search page (20 results) from 300 database hits to 150... Previously written by "senior" devs ARGH!!! No wonder the database server is collapsing2
-
Last saturday, the CEO forced us to update one of the services that we are dependent out without any tests... The people responsible for it very much advised against it but they still did it.
Now, nearly a week later. The literal core feature is still broken with no fix in sight and rolling back is not possible apparently.5 -
They are getting better..
Got a message on LinkedIn from a very beautiful recruiter lady asking me to have a coffee to discuss job possibilities.
She actually had a look at my skills.
- my native language is important
- Technologies and roles are a good fit
- she wrote that they also have an office here in Dublin (I mentioned in my profile that I’ll never take a job back home again)
„They also have a gaming room if you’re into that“..
The probably best message I’ve ever gotten from a recruiter.
If I wouldn’t really like my current job I’d definitely meet up with her..
Hypothetical question.. would it be okay to hit on a recruiter on LinkedIn although you’re not interested in the job?😍8 -
when you are the one that knows about networks and computer and no one else knows about and it's my fault that it doesn't work and the ISP has a full log of everything that has been done. how about no they don't because it's just router changes not anything that we browsed to on the internet. why don't you go back and do what you do and I do what I do?
-
If the christian god exists, then I'll go to hell because of my sexual orientation. Little do they know, as I wake up there, I'll make two steps back to pick up a chainsaw. It's there and I know it.
Dear god, watch out. Your days are numbered. I'll make Nietzsche "god is dead" stuff look like a fucking joke.
I'm coming for you.12 -
Some people may remember me posting about our rabbits a while ago.
Sadly they both passed away a few weeks back.
They were both a little over a year old and died within 4 days of each other, one on Wednesday morning and then one on the Saturday morning.
After about 1200 in emergency vets fees and another 500 for a post mortem on Spencer (who died on Saturday) we found out the vets had fucked up their vaccinations.
In the U.K. it is recommended that rabbits are vaccinated against 3 viruses Myxomatosis (Myxo), Rabbit Haemorrhagic Disease Variant 1 (RHD1), and Rabbit Haemorrhagic Disease Variant 2 (RHD2).
They got their vaccinations for Myxo and RHD1 in January, and went back two weeks later for their RHD2 vaccination.
Now it turns out, when they went back for the second vaccination they were incorrectly given the Myxo and RHD1 vaccinations again.
The lab results showed Spencer had RHD, but not which variant and it is safe to assume Frank also has RHD.
The vets were going to get another lab to test for the variant but decided not too (funny that they don’t want to confirm whether it was their fuck up that killed two otherwise perfectly healthy rabbits).
The wife and I are considering getting legal advise.
What fucks me off so much is that it wasn’t a situation where there were two possible courses of treatment, or they didn’t respond to treatment, it was just a human fucking up.
The practice manager also like to keep mentioning that vaccines aren’t 100% effective, and because they won’t test for the variant of RHD we will never know 100% whether their fuck up killed our rabbits.
I’m contemplating trying to get in touch with the lab and paying for the extra tests myself.
Due to the nature of the virus it also means we can’t get anymore rabbits for 3-4 months.3 -
Lets make sure that we are always using the latest software! Keep things up to date#
..... (new version of bulma.io comes out)
..... (Updating libraries...)
.....
Why is the website all fucked up looking?
Shit they changed the padding level on like everything?!
..... Reverting back to older version, fuck that idea.2 -
I work in huge corporation. Got an offer for smaller company and gave 2 week notice. My corporation offered me better base salary and retention bonus to stay. I accepted (mistake) and now they are not coming back with retention bonus or salary increase. I found out they did same trick with different person. Wtf... huge corporation is doing those kind of shenanigans?6
-
https://devrant.com/rants/5155862/...
Alright! I take it back. I don’t like “this”. Hooks are better. But are they the best? We will see.
Namaste.3 -
Is it just me, or are ++' much easier to get by nowadays? Back, in my early dR days, you saw one, maybe 2 posts with more than 50 ++. Numbers over 100 meant that it is definitely worth reading. And now, almost every second rant has got 50 ++ and more, and TBF most aren't even that quality rants that they used to be.2
-
Is it just me or has Windows SDK gone down hill horribly in recent times
WPF -> UWP was a giant and good step
then they kinda killed off UWP, focused on XAML Islands
then came Windows 11 which breaks some UWPs built with WinUI2 coz the components are tied to the OS and not self-contained, so some dont exist in Win11 and the apps crash on runtime
Now there's WinUI3 but it assumes that the starting point is Windows 11, I try to build em on Win10 (coz win11 sucks ass), and intellisense it all crazy
These are all issues one can circumvent IF they align their setups the way MSFT desires
But the fact that these issues exist and wont work out of the box, makes me wonder how long before they start recommending Electron or some other "JS/TS-based UI framework" that'll work within ChakraCore or something. Getting back to WPF/Win32 days5 -
Now that mention notifs are back, how many convos would you have missed if they were to never come back?
For me, it’s 1.8 -
It’s so crazy to me how my bosses sometimes wake up and it’s like they get in a groupthink that we are stuck on technology from five years ago. The company has grown our paths have simplified, our tools have gotten more powerful.
Everybody forgets that a new feature has come out occasionally, but sometimes for weeks at a time they will go about explaining things the old way, or saying it can’t be done. Then they’ll come back around. This has been on and off for all of this year basically. -
The WordPress Gutenberg editor is now starting to hit unsuspecting users who havn't been following up with the preview phase. They mostly hate it, and the arrogance from the WP pricks is stunning.
My favourite quote from WP.org admin Otto: "This is the future editor in WordPress. It is happening. There's no stopping that train now. People thinking that they can somehow stop the train are people who are standing in front of a train. That never really ends well."
Yeah you little dipshit, do you know what did end FUCKING well? Not having put myself on your bloody track in the first place so that I can sit back and enjoy my popcorn! :-)13 -
The irony that goes along with smooth migrations on production is this.
If the migration is smooth, no one knows how much effort, careful planning and execution went into the whole process. They just get a for your information mail that everything went smooth. No one, not involved in the process would know the scale of things; or what could've happened if the transition/migration was screwed up.
On the other hand if there are problems during the process and the tech team fights back, they indeed are the heroes. No one notices the silent crusaders.
No wonder then that all superheroes just smash stuff. Its only then that people notice that they worked so hard. Silent superheroes remain dead.rant smooth migrating production transition developer life superhero migration programmer life disaster -
I hate the current state of internet based service providers. They are collecting so much data, it's scary and borderline stalking.
A simple search on Netflix changes ads shown by Google. I watch a lot of Japanese/Korean drama and now my ads are in Japanese. What the actual fuck.
I run windows 10 on my main rig because of steam and windows only games. One day I was searching for filezilla in windows search. Since it is now handled by the same UI as cortana, it searched it on the web too. So now I have ads related to ftp hosting in Japanese.
Sometimes I feel like just formatting my system and install debian on it. But those games man. May be I can live without them.
Can we bring back the internet from 2008. It was so much better back then.12 -
So the project I work on basically has to talk to a 3rd party plugin, through a 3rd party framework. The 3rd party plugin is a black box. This conversation happened:
Software guy: so we aren't sure what is breaking the thing. It's either us or the plugin, but it's probably both.
Systems guy: well then if we aren't sure then why are we writing an issue for it.
SWG: because we aren't sure but we know we are doing at least something that contributes. We read int X from a table and put it into a float. X doesn't perfectly represent in a float. It comes out X.0001. Then they take it and when it comes back it comes back as Y.0001. We cram it into an int so it becomes Y, we compare it to X which is really X.0001 and it comes back invalid.
SG: well as long as we are sending them the right number . . .
SWG: but we aren't sending them the right number. They are expecting X not X.0001. Then they send us back Y.0001 but it should be X so it's wrong.
SG: so they're giving us the wrong return value.
SWG: yes, but because we're giving them the wrong number.
SG: well not exactly . . .
SWG: yes exactly. It is off by .0001 because of floating point math.
SG: well . . .
Me: look it doesn't matter how it's breaking. But it IS broken. Which is why we're filling out the damn problem report. THEY ARE EDITABLE. We talked to the customer and gave them the risk assessment. They don't care. It happens rarely any way.
SG: then can we lower the severity?
Me: no. Severity doesn't relate to risk. That is a whole different process. Severity assumes it has already happened. It's a a high severity.
SG: but the metrics.
Me: WE GIVE THE METRICS TO THE CUSTOMER. WE TALKED TO THE CUSTOMER. THEY DON'T GIVE A SHIT.
And that was how I spent Wednesday wondering how a level 4 lead systems engineer got his job. How many push ups did he do? What kind of juice did he drink?2 -
How do you deal with having too much work on your back but still wanting to help people around you, because you know they are good people and trying their best but they also have too much work to do?5
-
This is an old one that I have hacked about to make it fit, so I hope it still works..
There were a business user, a B.A. and a developer on a road trip in the UK when they crossed the border into Wales. (This was antevirum, so that kind of behaviour was allowed back then).
They saw a sheep on a mountainside.
The business user cried out "Look! All the sheep in Wales are black!"
The B.A. tutted and said "Actually, all we can say is that there is at least one sheep in Wales and it is black down one side."
The developer woke up from nursing his hangover in the back seat, peered out of the window and said "How do you know its a sheep?" -
Story time;
Major project, multi million budget, huge business and IT coordination, board level status updates, meeting started back in March 2018 for a Go Live of Aug 2019.
Based on draft requirements (and experience) I request the test environment be built for half of the work. Turns out that no one told Server Eng and they are out of space in both dev and prod until Q2 of 2019. We went from Green to Red because a Service Request.5 -
My wife and all of our friends are Brazilian. When they are all talking in a group in Portuguese, my mind wonders off and wishing I was back doing my coding.
Like, if you want to include me, talk my language! English, PHP, JavaScript... All acceptable.2 -
I told my new Director that I am not one for going with third party vendors. He claimed that I was biased. I am really.
But I told him that support and troubleshooting are the main reasons why I dislike third party vendors as well as the request for X software to do Y non supported thing, they always state during a sales call that they can accommodate, they never do.
As an example, I send them the logs of a support ticket for one particular piece of software that we have, for which I detailed the situation, only for them to NEVER respond and then after 5 days close the ticket stating that I never replied back to them, even when they never replied back.
A custom made in house solution will always be superior to your run of the mill all encompassing app. But try and make a non dev understand this. I wish my old director was back. I miss the fuck out of that dude. Loved working for him.12 -
Side projects are one of the biggest battery booster you can have.
For me it's common to get burnt out with fixing a bug or refactoring some pretty old logic, and working in side projects is a nice break to recharge the batteries without necessarily getting your mind totally out of programming. It doesn't matter if they are yours our someone else's, they can do wonders.
(Also, it's good to learn different stuff from what you are used to, like frontend developer working on some back-end logic in a side project)1 -
Been trying to update some really old C++ piece of code.
And all the comments and variable names are in FR*NCH.
Apparently they didn't had accents in the keyboards back then, because they used stars instead.
Makes it really hard to tell commented code from French comments.
Obs: I don't speak nor can read French. Neither does anyone in my team.11 -
Rearranging my bedroom/office and just found a fucking ps2 to serial adaptor... Are they even a fucking thing?!
Side note also found my pipe tobacco and pipe, time to get back to looking dapper as fuck!3 -
Alright, so, let's say you're me. 16 years old, just started a summer job at a networking company. It's me and three others, and the people who hired us, quite frankly, aren't as prepared as they should be. So we get our first task at around 4, are told it's meant to last the week, and go home. Get back in the morning, find out someone did all the work overnight6
-
Last week: Build out a landing page and contact form in Pardot. Deliver to client after a quick QA pass through.
Friday: Get nasty message from client via basecamp about how the entire page looks like complete crap. We're also very unprofessional and can't deliver a simple request, while we charge a premium for our services.
So I, wondering what I managed to screw up so horribly, hop on to the test page I sent them. Except, its different and looks like crap.
They edited the page after it was sent to them and are pissed it doesn't match the comps they sent over. So I edit it back - except for the form. The one they added selects and textarea boxes to. Fields they didn't include in their comp and there was no mention of them wanting to use.
Today: Phone call with client. Every single complain they have about the page template they delivered all goes back to one of 3 things.
1. Their designer doesn't know how to use their global styles in his designs. So when things match their global styles (as they specifically asked for) they don't understand why they don't match the comp in a side by side view.
2. They change their mind on a design after the page was built. They won't admit this is the case and want to blame someone else for it not looking the way they want it. You know, "Spirit and Style of their current site"
3. They're idiots.
So now, I put aside a much more fun React project for an Amazon owned grocery chain and work on this nonsense. -
I just rebooted my server by accident because I wanted to play Space Engineers.
Long story short, dual booting. Needed to boot into windows. Typed reboot into my terminal. My terminal was not local. When am I finally getting around to set up my terminal color as red when it is connected to another host?
But two things are good here. This was my own server.. Well, bunch of stuff is running on it, including for my bachelor's thesis. But if that was a server of my company, that would have been worse.
Second thing, my systems are fault tolerant. I reboot once per week at the latest and for systems with fail overs once per day. I know they are coming back up. I don't worry. My Gitlab will be back in 5 minutes at the latest. I am going to reboot and play Space Engineers now.
Reboot your servers guys. Only way to make sure they'll survive reboots!4 -
Oh man, stands out first in my memory. Was going ok until my original boss got transferred in to another department... The first replacement was one of our HR managers 🤔
The person she then made as similar to a team lead had issues with me when I had just a bit of a different perspective about a problem to solve - I soon found myself in technical support. Go figure...
I'll never forget what one of the directors said to me a little while after they shifted me:
"Not everyone can do what they want to do if they are not good at it..." I look back on that heart breaking moment and say with pride: FUCK, YOU.3 -
Microsoft stuff.
Everything they are promoting and developing have problems with c++, either messy implementations, non standard extensions, weird behaviours, passive aggressive stance toward official iso standard, broken api, lack of components(libs) or non portable ones, shitloads of errors traced back to undescribed, undocumented anywhere dlls, and shitload of other problems -
Client (who hosts our programs on their website) sends an email there is an issue! Resolve is asap. - I drop a brick if my boss finds out about this he will kick off.
I look into it the best I can but there is no testing environment for their website so do the best I can on our environment. Every thing seems to be doing exactly what it should and can't reproduce. So I email client I can't reproduce and everything looks fine are you sure it's not at your end?
They email back I got someone at our end to look at it and he's sure it's your end. So I spend a rather long time looking into this and still find nothing so email back for more information and a video of them reproducing the issue.
They email back: umm sorry seems it was our side that was causing the issue, only noticed it when making the video.
*sigh* more time wasted thanks clients! -
ATLAST THEY REMOVED THE NEXT BUTTON!
I have read it so many times that 90% of Google users never click the next page button and thought , that's completely true, even I don't do that. Why don't they remove it?Nice philosophical move, Google.
Although , to think about it,i guess they are smartly hiding a trick to respond back on the site-priority accusations : "No , we are not moving the local sites to later pages while featuring in the Google search(than the ones who are paying us hefty loads of for ad-money, or say amazon). You see, their is no 'next' page. They are all there on your screen. Just get a 30 inch long screen and you will see them all. "
:| -
Head hunters reaching out with a "position that might intrest you".. with a stack of skills that are not on my CV at aaaaall
Also Headhunters after answering back: oh you have only 1 year experience with that tool? They want at least 3, goodbye.
All just a phishing scam to get u to give them an updated CV version.. no real "relevant position" in sight. Smh.3 -
I wonder if management has realized that they are the parasites that is holding the tech industry back all this time.6
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I work for a particular tech company doing chat based support where I troubleshoot a certain email application.
And one of the most common phrases I get is: "Hey Mister IT Guy, I am suddenly missing all of my contacts and Calendars. This super sucks! I had to rebuild my email profile to make my email work again!".
I really wish when they teach computer literacy in school they drilled "Learn How To Back Up Your Junk" more so when stuff like this happens I can get them back up and running in 10 minutes instead of telling the user they are going to have spend hours rebuilding their calendar and contacts.1 -
So this week I picked up some Sennheiser HD 600 phones for my listening pleasure and take my mind off life stresses.
At work I've been using some Bose phones, but these Senns being open back may be a little loud for the neighboring cubicles.
I guess sound quality and all day use are mutually exclusive. Anyways, what's coding without some great indie tunes. :)
BTW, they sound amazing!!2 -
Tl;Dr: Client has no idea how much development costs
(Un)potential client has been asking to develop an AV solution for Android phones to sell on the play store. Problem is I know they're cheap fucks and won't pay for a proper development cycle. Just for an exercise I put together the minimum cost they are looking at if they cut back on a lot of things and purchase lots of things off the shelf and gave them a bare minimum cost of £4350. Which is utterly fucking ridiculous to think you could develop something even half decent for that. I mean we all know that AV is a bit of a joke for any serious threat, it just protects from the billions of pests in cyberspace, but I mean come on.
Anyway, they are freaking out because apparently that's a lot. Out of interest, what would be your ballpark figures for this.9 -
When commenting it would be nice to see the comment you are commenting against. Often they are long with several points and you can't refer back to it8
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Currently working a contract for a startup that never finishes the final content editing and organization task so that we can build the last page. They were in such a hurry to start and we 100% delivered everything they asked for on time and at budget. Now that we are centimeters from the finish line, they keep pushing the date back due to the CEO never having time to provide feedback. It’s been months and we cannot get to the final work to earn the final payment.
Not the worst one (which I already shared another week a while back) but definitely not fun.4 -
What is the point of these fucking retards contacting ME first on linkedin to schedule an interview and then forever ghost me? All of them tell me how everything was good and they will search for more clients and let me know as soon as they find a project but never ever reply back? Why are clowns in this fucking industry so sinister and fucking cancerous?7
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Friendly reminder to trim your services list with msconfig if using Windows. Services that are STOPPED are not DISABLED, and they can be brought back up when just stopped, sometimes remotely.
(This reduces chances of being bitten by malware that uses the Fax service or similar, as there are a few that have in past used often-unused services to propagate. It also reclaims a small bit of memory, and the more real memory you have, the less you page out when compiling or similar, which is slow as fuck.)
also for the love of god stop using RDP and use something that's more penetration-proof than a paper plate...11 -
So I resigned from work 6 months ago and they counter offered with a sweet pay deal as they were totally fubar without me
That 6 month deal expired today and they are totally surprised that Im not going back to full time (so I can work on my start-up side project)
I've offered to go back part time on a more reasonable salary and they are totally pissed. Surely the writing was on the wall!!
Here is an idea. When your bus factor is 1... Hire some other people! -
I AM SO ANGRY! Today my job fired me for the stupidest reason!! A while back I lost my job a (non-important) client for having an "overactive temper" so my boss made me begin taking VRTAM (or virtual reality therapy for Anger Management). Well I attended the first couple things but decided to stop because they were definitely stealing my information. I don't know what sketchy website they found for that but as a dev I can tell when they are taking my personal information. Also there's no way it works I attended a couple sessions and nothing helped because I DONT HAVE ANGER ISSUES!!! Anyway my job found out I had been skipping them and when they confronted me they avoided my concerns and just fired me... Haven't told my wife yet, she's going to be so mad.8
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There are some who view software as a social construct (like Pieter Hientjes), and I think it's a valuable perspective. So if we know about the intrinsic brokenness of software, can we deduce sth about the brokenness of human interactions? Did social API's evolve to similar clusterfucks of dead entropy we have to shovel in our brains to get along?
I think the answer is an emphatic yes. And you know what's even making it worse? Software. Y'know there are all these whining about the millenials, and I too have had my experiences with stuff of that category. Like back when we searched a new roommate for our flat, we needed three rounds because people who had said yes suddenly reconsidered. Similarly now when we tried to sell our couch: people tried to push the price. Said they were interested, never showed up at the appointed time. It's like they have been spoiled by Amazon: expecting to buy with one click, for the cheapest price and send back if they don't like. And that is not a generation thing. Those old blokes ranting on the young are just as bad. They are just as lost in antisocial media as anybody else. It's a general erosion of not sticking to civility and courtesy, to the yes or no once said, coz everything is now as flexible and fluid as the digital projections of ourselves transmitted round the globe, changing in realtime.
I fucking hate it. - I'm out like this stupid Tom Cruise character in Oblivion.6 -
testing feature: that is not what the specs say this how this is suppose to work. so, I write a bug report.
conversation with developer goes as follows
developer: this is not a bug. sends the bug report back.
me: the specs say it is a bug. I resubmit the bug.
developer: sends it back saying that it has been changed in the new specs.
me: how do I get the new specs?
developer: it is on the server, go ask your boss on where ecaxtally on the server they are. then, he closes the bug report.1 -
Coworker asked to complete a part of a client's implementation that I trained them on so that I can be freed up for other projects. Month later asks me to take it back over as the client wants it done next week and they are going on vacation. Completed none of the work and didn't follow up/resolve an issue that I explained when they took it over. Thanks for that.1
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For future generations :
Bring back cocaine to coca cola.
Since 1904 Coca Cola no longer contains extract from cocaine leaves.
Drugs who made us.
If we live in matrix and we are simulated the general rule would be wipe bugs from the system so ex. if all of people were using cocaine cause they drink coca cola the wipe would be remove cocaine from the coca cola. That would fix the cocaine bug. Cause people in 1904 had almost no knowledge about how world looks like, they were using pigeons to deliver messages. If we bring back cocaine maybe we would also bring back those times, when everyone dropped cocaine in 1939 - 35 years old ourselves were fighting to death between each other cause of rehab.
I wonder how many of those non visual but only statistical bugs we have on this planet. Machine learning is just one of the tools we use to learn about them.1 -
Mom and dad randomly came home and bought me a brand new 15 pro max as a gift for starting my first devops job on 15th december... I didnt ask for this. Nor do i urgently need it. I wanted to buy it myself when i earn money. But i cant be ungrateful so ill be humble and appreciate this gift. I feel bad for them, they are broke and are now paying off this phone for 2 years every month. additional unnecessary stress of money shit on top of their back and i dont like that. Need to give them back as soon as i earn from this shit job and also buy my mom the same phone for her bday thats in 3 months5
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If they are a good PM just do your job, they’ll leave you alone. If not, just throw some of that micro management back at them. Tell them you need at least an hour of their time to show them how to properly hold a pencil, but that if they need to hold off on that it’s understandable as they have plenty of flaws to work on. That should make things fun
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I've been learning java back end web since November last year. A month ago I've tried JS/React and have fallen for it. All my back end guys are hating on me now, because, as they say, I'm not "an intellectual" anymore but a just JS pleb 🌩️🌩️
Wrong people to talk to i guess :sigh:18 -
Boss: Ready for deployment?
Me: No, there's still a few bugs.
Boss: let me know when they are fixed!
(Goes back to desk, runs without any issues)
Me: It all finished.
Boss: Wow how did you fix it so fast.
Me: I have no idea. -
Semantic ui is bullshit.
I have been css frameworks
Bootstrap
Foundation
2 more that i forgot.
They are huge and simple to understand.
Now fucking with semantic ui. Bullshit docs. Javascript problems conflicts.
Will try bulma without js.
Or back to bootstrap.5 -
I'm sure everybody here knows that when you lend a usb to somebody, your coworker or friend... THEY NEVER GIVE IT BACK. And you can't ask it back outta nowhere because it will make you seem like a cheapskate. You can't also ask them in a casual conversation too because you are not that close (if it's coworker or a friend you don't talk much to anymore). And even if you ask them they still won't give it back because they usually have the memory of a goldfish. So you go buy a new usb.. knowing that it will also disappear.4
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Mozilla has gone to shit long ago, but this week they somehow have outdone Microsoft on enshitification spree. One post is enough.
My two cents: https://techhub.social/@vintprox/...
Entire thread: https://techhub.social/@mozilla@moz...
Turns out those "Community Calls" they've hosted are just a ploy to damage control Mozilla's first steps into AI crap, back when they added prompts to MDN Web Docs. Fast-forward to today and even most loyal Firefox users should get enraged. Call me surprised (no pun intended).
So, Waterfox and Librewolf it is, then... Or Vivaldi, who cares at this point, really.3 -
is it so hard to screen capture only the relevant details necessary to reproduce a bug? i just watched a video where for 2:30 min, literally nothing happened. and half of rest of the time, they randomly click stuff, as if they've forgotten what they want to show. nobody can give me this lost lifetime back. and the testuff video player is so crappy that i can't even reasonably jump forward / backward or increase playing speed. i even prefer crappy, wiggly upright phone videos if they are on point and don't steal my time. SHOW ME THE BUG ALREADY2
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What the fucking is happening with react? They advice you to use NextJs but that thing is just Vercel trying to force us buy their servers. Are we going back to PHP ? Tightly coupled front-backend.
I used to just build any React/Front app and deploy the bundle on a bucket and let the CDN do the rest.
Now you need to spin up a fucking node server to just serve some fucking html. Wtf are we heading.
They say it's for the SEO, why not fix the SEO problem altogether then ? Plus there are already SEO solution out there for SPA.
I'm very disappointed in YouTubers like Theo that are out there pushing people to use vercel and showing tutorial in dep
Bro all we need is npm fucking fucking build8 -
We need to bring back the Mongols to stop the Chinese from taking over.
I found this Mongolian rock band and feel they are amazing.
https://youtube.com/watch/...12 -
New bossman is looking for KPIs.
We're an agile team who build a back end system for a large corporation. Specifically the system we build is used by the sales guys when they are putting through a sale. I have no idea where to start with KPIs.
Can't measure number of sales as that's down to the salesmen. Can't measure speed of sale as again that's down to the salesman and how much they chat.
Any ideas?8 -
so, i was on cloud 9 after having learnt n mastered(hopefully) angularjs..but the devs said wait, u r outdated, we r up with angular2..i was up for the challenge, folded my sleeves n started scratching angular2 only to realise they had more to mock me up when they finally said, haha, learnt angular2? now get ready for angular4..!! nd m damn sure by the tym i hv learnt angular4, they wud say, oh we r really sorry for u, we are back with angular5, 6, 7:@2
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I remember few years back when I had subscribed to this ISP, where few months on subscription worked flawlessly. Then it was all downwards from there. Customer care never answered. Charged for bloddy whole month whilst the working was just for 2 weeks. People subscribing to this ISP had a facebook group named ISP Victim. Was forced to change my ISP.
Now, few days back they put up a stall in an IT exhibition. I went up and signed in for their service. Now they call me for setting up their network, either i tell them am not available or dont answer at all. I do the same to them what they did to me. That utmost pleasure HAHA. I shared this idea in the facebook group and people are starting to do the same.
I feel like a con artist now. -
Just learnt that some people in the access admin team intentionally back log their tickets just to tell people how busy they are.
But most request you raise in their queue doesn't get resolved unless you show up at their desks.2 -
Getting real sick of companies who think they can get out of obviously bad claims by making claims that are "less bad" and more technical. As if it improves the situation. But alas Huawei....
"No we weren't spying. It's not a back door. We just forgot that we left telnet enabled for 7 years."
Fucking really?! That's supposed to make you trustworthy?!3 -
Holy shit big companies are absolutely rubish. How on earth do they not think about the long term. I'm like "look what we are doing isn't right, we can't make new functionality that will no longer works in 6month. The other department webservices are changing and you're well aware of that" and they're like "we need to produce value, we don't have the resources, blabla". Why should I care? f#ck you it's not my company and don't come back crying that it's not working.
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Woo time for a Chromebook rant against Samsung!
So they just 'revised' the Chromebook plus (Currently using v1 to write this) and I was intrigued because they ditched the Samsung made ARM chips for an intel CPU.... Buuuuuuuuuut... It's a fucking celeron... Of all fucking things to put in a half thousand dollar laptop, at least an m3 would be useful. Then I find out they are ditching the full metal body, it's heavier, thicker, same 3GB of RAM, ditching the 3:2 aspect ratio (Fucking why?!) and the 'upgraded' keyboard doesn't even have back lighting...
Ugh, makes me want a pixel book more, double the price and a million times the performance and quality -.-5 -
I started watching "Squid Games" this morning and well after the first round the players are given a chance to quit.
Which they do... But then come back.
Well, I bought some Ethereum a few weeks ago before crypto tanked...
But checking in this morning I'm now back to break-even...
And well feels like I'm gonna keep playing too... -
How do you share some feedback about certain things to your peers?
A little context.
Within our team, me and another person are two senior folks and we are the ones who are answering all the queries to external teams, product, issues, incidents. Obviously we are seniors so we tend to lead by example and try to handle as much as we can. But this is giving the junior folks a nice getaway to not pitch in and scale and handle things as well. They are happy to sit back and when me or the other senior person is not available, their response to all the queries is that we dont know because we havent worked on it and then when we come back, we respond to those.
Also for the work, what usually should take 1-2 days, takes 3-5 days for these guys. 3-5 days of work gets delivered by them in 2-3 weeks. And the reason again, this is new, i didnt not get this and i have facing this issue. In all of this, our lead is quite laid back as well and doesnt inquire more about why things are constant getting delayed from their side.
The side effect of this has been that more critical and time sensitive things gets pushed to us senior folks even more and we are seriously getting bogged down by the amount of work.
We want to question and point out to these junior folks that they need to scale up, but we feel a little helpless since it might make them more hostile and retaliate. Why are we saying these when our lead is not saying anything. That will be their argument. Plus it will create an unpleasant working environment which we dont want either.
We think of talking to our lead, but again, I am not sure if that would be considered as bitching about them.4 -
i hate it when comedians smile too much.
it's like they are trying to pander or something. Or compensate the lack of material or humor
God it's so awkward because they smile as if implying that they are funny.
It feels like they are trying to hypnotize the audience into thinking they are funny.
Or as if they were your friends, I don't know what it is, but it's fucking awful.
Isn't smiling back is an evolutionary trait? Marketing folks like to brainwash people with their smiles so there has to be some truth to it.
But the last damn thing I want marketing to corrupt is stand up humor.
Just count how many times jerrod carmichael smiles. Or kate mckinnon.
God fucking dammit, let me decide if you are funny.
You can have good material with meh delivery, but not the other way around, I'm not a fucking baby laughing as a reflex, I can understand sentences.12 -
What is the difference between a hacker and a phoenix ?
None, they feel both alive again when they are back from hashes. -
(first rant. woot!)
What the fuck are people eating in this office?? How the hell do they manage to spray paint the entire back side of the toilet bowl with a thick layer of fudge? Why the fuck would they think everyone else needs to see their spray painting skills? -
Our software outputs some xml and a client has another company loading this xml into some data warehouse and doing reporting on it. The other company are saying we are outputting duplicate records in the data.
I look and see something like this:
<foo name="test">
<bar value="2" />
<bar value="3" />
</foo>
They say there are two foo records with the name test..
We ask them to send the xml file they are looking at. They send an xlsx (Excel!) file which looks like this:
name value
test 2
test 3
We try asking them how they get xlsx from the xml but they just come back to our client asking to find what we changed because it was working before. Well we didn't change anything. This foo has two bar inside it which is valid data and valid xml. If you cant read xml just say so and we can output another format! -
My mom bought a new phone in a phone shop. They advised her a Samsung A25 prolly not matching the specs of her old iPhone. My mom doesn't do anything else than making videos with that thing, so storage and camera are important. Now, she doesn't get email configured on it somehow and the people of the store are like "we don't enter passwords because privacy Bla Bla". What a lame excuse fuck faces. Giving service is the only reason your sad stores still exists. Transferring data and configure them for older people. I've send her back to demand it from those scammers.
Fuck faces, refusing to do their job if they can get away with it1 -
I am an average Dev who is striving to improve. I currently work in a setting where I have the most experience in a corporate setting. I came from a very disciplined team where I had a great mentor. Now I am in a looser team with very bright people who don't have that experience. They are mainly JavaScript devs without much production experience. We are working in .net but they don't like working with back end code or databases. This is a 3 month contract. I want to do a good job. I have made enemies in the past and I just want to leave on a good note.
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Just got this email.... "I may have sent you this opening recently, and my client just got back to me this morning and said they are more urgent than ever to have a good candidate with this skillset join their team" I don't even know who this guy is?! Why do recruiters do this1
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I work for a service based company. We got our hands on a really good project a few months back and were really excited to work with the client because they are solving a really good problem. So much so that they received awards and stuff too.
Turns out they are real high headed cunts who think that everyone works beneath them. They don’t respond back, don’t reply for days and when they do, they ask for a 60-70% change in previously working apps and web. They take things so lightly that we’ve been production ready for 3 weeks. They called us and asked us the reason for delay and they still haven’t provided us with production creds. Fucking asswipes. -
In my internship, I was assigned for back-end development. I'm a first years student, so it's enough work for me. But I'm also making documents to be approved by other services (very frenchie) and I'm not allowed to code while these documents are not validated. And now, they are trying to make me do front-end and all the design validation process etc...
I can't see this hierarchy anymore, I'm hating work... -
Hello there, long time no see.
Back in the day I asked you for a book that goes deep in the C programming language, now I'm asking the same but for Nodejs, especially a book that explains the event loop down to the line of code.
There are some articles on the internet but they are all copy/paste of one another and don't even scratch the surface of what the event loop does2 -
Way of wasting time:
generating csv and importing in Open Office Calc, mysteriously what should be ",-," shows as "-0".
I thought some strange fucking time function was responsible of generating a "0" after my "-", until I discovered that for some fucking reason, Open Office Calc decides to add the fucking "0" by itself.
And they say that computer do what they are told to. I just said to import a fucking "-", it's called "Minus". do you fucking understand Calc?
Back to something useful.1 -
Ah yes back from school, back into trying to get Arquillian to work. After trying to build on Jenkins (just for a test if they fixed some of the Problems) suddenly it wont even build properly, because they removed the datasource that my Arquillian tests were running on. Great. Not only are my tests not working now, but the whole fucking thing won't build and trying to get a datasource into the Arquillian Container is a pain the ass.
I've set it up according to multiple tutorials. But it always tries to read a non existant datasource... Why, why, why the fuck do I have to do this shit. I fucking hate everything related to JBoss. It... never... works. -
So, the reason the world sucks, is they look at restoring everything to a livable situation as going backwards.
Back to a better time
Back before a person knew something
would have saved us all a lot more youth life and hardship if they'd pulled their heads out of their asses and realized the generalized TRENDS are not hard and fast rules like they try to make them.
Easier for nothing to be forever most especially if they didn't lie so much. Like saying someone is dead who is not, or someone is alive who is not, or messing with someones finances or stress levels or pretending that a person isn't able to return to a profession after a hiatus or that hardship that makes a person blameless for unemployment etc is a life ender because some younger idiot is always on the way.
or how about just the dynamic of losing everything due to losing/leaving a job, being incarcerated, or having a health problem. these things are ALL exploitable concepts that are taken advantage of every day when they should be insulated against so society can thrive and be safeguarded against the most warped members of the human race.
if we wrote code the way they govern or live everytime someone kicked their box something would work, and everytime they hit enter more than once their machine would overheat and turn off.
hell or if you waited a few seconds it would delete your whole database. -
Worst part of being a dev?
When you need to work together with people that are too stubborn. Recently I needed to work together with 2 guys and when they started ranting on me for literally nothing, I realized not everyone is able to work in a team.
Now im ranting back on them.
What are your experiences with people like this and what do you do to make teamwork more enjoyable? -
Small start-up story:
The company hired independent foreign devs. The tech lead developer has decided to leave (due to some disputes with the boss(es)). The rest of his team are subcontractors/other independent devs that are good friends with the lead dev. We also recently adopted a 'scrum' which they really dislike.
So I guess there is a small change we will have a back-end team in the near future.2 -
Does anyone feel like their boss is always scheming behind your back. They are changing the requirements and rejecting you without even reviewing your work and are too good to attend any meetings. They’re trying their best but wouldn’t ever give you credit when you are trying your best and getting good results. At what point does the micro management and fear of failure make it so you can’t even take the simplest feature without melting down?1
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I swear it is easier to do a full-stack application all by yourself rather than make a front-end and a back-end newbie work alongside you in a way that justifies the pay being given to them by the project manager(for a freelance project).
Not that they are bad or anything, but it takes more effort to offload work to them with enough explanation to convey the expectations properly while accounting for the learning they are yet to do.1 -
Ok so these fucks call me back to talk about why their sites are down
1 went into maintenance mode and the other got fucking hacked and they want to pin that shit on me
Fuck these fuckers4 -
Why employers strongly believe Front-End and Back-End are synonyms of Full-Stack?
They are requiring Front devs to have knowledge and experience with relational databases and Back devs to be experts in HTML and CSS, sometimes graphic design stuff too.
For God's sake just hire a Full-stack Dev3 -
I think the "ultimate success" means success on a personal level:
Take a step back. Realize *this* does not matter. It allows you to build and support your own family. Be with your loved ones. Have pets. See your kids grow up. Grow old together. Looking back on a fulfilling life. Dying surrounded by your loved ones. Knowing, they are safe and cared for. I'm so proud of you what you have created out of nothing! You truly are a developer!
And now go back arguing about tabs vs. spaces on the internet.1 -
I did an oopsie.
I accidentally accepted a job/project through a friend and realized later that I would have to use wordpress which I have absolutely 0 experience with.
The thing is it's a website for swimming club and at first I was like sure let me just recycle this old school project. But then I've realized they are gonna need something dynamic (to update their schedules etc.) and that they will need something user friendly.
Later I found out that their previous website uses wordpress and that they like it and wanna keep that.
So here I am, thinking if I should just back off or try the dangerous way of learning it while creating the website (it probably wouldn't be worth the money since they won't pay much).
Honestly, how did I even get to this point.2 -
Remember, when a client is telling that the job you are doing something trivial or easy, he/she is most likely try to pay you less for it.
If the job is trivial, it should cost less. People underrate things to pay less. Don't back down, stand your ground and tell them to piss of, they will pull back their bluff. -
Hello, i have this problem. Can u read the image and figure out what this corps deal is, and what to do about it. They shut down my account because i use vpn, and they wont turn it back on. I need this service to do my job. My managers are going to be mad.9
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Does anyone else's notifs glitch out on here? I keep clearing them but every time I load it back up my notifications are back - currently up to 16 and they won't go away10
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In the beginning, even those who are remotely involved with the task/project want to contribute to it. Over the time, as they realise that there is some serious work to do, one by one the turn quiet and drop out.
But as soon as you take action to make sure that the whole thing is going to work out in the end, they come back complaining because they feel that you went over their heads.
WTF?! -
No, they didn't supported and infact are source of major problems in my dev and college career. Just granpa and dad, they wanted me to go for government jobs. Whenever they saw me with laptop they will say things like, you are ruining your future, this won't be asked in exams etc. They are good at manipulation too and sadly they won. Forced me to take civil engineering as it makes you eligible for most government jobs. I didn't knew what was going on my mind back then, and why i listened to such peices of shits. Real bad decision.
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Playstation plus extra has pillars of eternity and pathfinder. Surprised to find out they had proper gamepad support. Really diggin the chilled nature of those games. Back to having the longest gaming sessions like when i was a teen. New games nowadays like the soulslikes games are too much sometimes. Especially when you just want to chillout. Also bcs of job cant do pc gaming with keyboard and mouse at all.3
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tldr: i take pride of our code! It hurts when someone calls it wrong when i know it was right.
So there was this integrations team that are trying to connect to our api. This team has been throwing different people to work with us. We even taught them how to use postman/soapui with ssl, even to the point that we search stackoverflow to resolve their code-level issues and left us halfway, then came back again repeating all process. A year passed, they came back with the same issue... now all answer that they get from us was to “review past conversation”, Today, they insist that we repeat ssl onboarding process as they are having issues with their current one, we insisted not to do it, and told them we (including them) can proceed without changing the client ssl. And told them we had a snippet sent to resolve their issues, but instead told us in a rude way, our sample is wrong. I was challenged to prove that we can make it work by eod. With their wrong sense of pride as theyve been working for that issue for long, they started throwing tantrums on us, saying that we do not need to make them feel that they do not know what their doing. man! Cmon, its you who requested that snippet few years back, then you tell us you dont need it as it is not working, in the first place, it is not our job to code for you asses,...i left the channel after. it was escalated quickly to management and accounts team(those people who only cares for traffic/money).. asked to return to the channel, spoonfed the details to them, provided a working snippet and left again.not sure what happened next.,. I hope this started a fire on our management to handle such incompetence. -
In most businesses, self-proclaimed full-stack teams are usually more back-end leaning as historically the need to use JS more extensively has imposed itself on back-end-only teams (that used to handle some basic HTML/CSS/JS/bootstrap on the side). This is something I witnessed over the years in 4 projects.
Back-end developers looking for a good JS framework will inevitably land on the triad of Vue, React and Angular, elegant solutions for SPA's. These frameworks are way more permissive than traditional back-end MVC frameworks (Dotnet core, Symfony, Spring boot), meaning it is easy to get something that looks like it's working even when it is not "right" (=idiomatic, unit-testable, maintainable).
They then use components as if they were simple HTML elements injecting the initial state via attributes (props), skip event handling and immediately add state store libraries (Vuex, Redux). They aren't aware that updating a single prop in an object with 1000 keys passed as prop will be nefarious for rendering performance. They also read something about SSR and immediately add Next.js or Nuxt.js, a custom Node express.js proxy and npm install a ton of "ecosystem" modules like webpack loaders that will become abandonware in a year.
After 6 months you get: 3 basic forms with a few fields, regressions, 2MB of JS, missing basic a11y, unmaintainable translation files & business logic scattered across components, an "outdated" stack that logs 20 deprecation notices on npm install, a component library that is hard to unit-test, validate and update, completely vendor-& version locked in and hundreds of thousands of wasted dollars.
I empathize with the back-end devs: JS frameworks should not brand themselves as "simple" or "one-size-fits-all" solutions. They should not treat their audience as if it were fully aware and able to use concepts of composition, immutability, and custom "hooks" paired with the quirks of JS, and especially WHEN they are a good fit. -
Completed all interview stages with a recruitment firm last month. Passed all the stages. They reach out to me to begin with. They reach out to me saying they are currently waiting to hear back from the partner firm whom they shared my profile with but I was successful in the final stage. I asked the recruiter what's up like a month ago and she said she was waiting to hear back from the partner. It's been 4 weeks now and I don't want to seem desperate so I am holding off on emailing the recruiter again. Do u guys think it is a bust offer? The company is prominent here and I feel they wouldn't make me go through all the stages of interview if they didn't have a placement for me. I am so impatient coz I am basically out of a job rn, haven't been paid in the second month and man I need this job coz I know they pay well. What do I doooo???1
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Today I went to a restaurant and I heard some "developers" talking about games. They were talking about an unfamous MOBA game. And the next thing I heard was "I hate MOBA games.... There are too many players". I never went back to that restaurant.
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Why recruiters are sometimes taking so long to answer? I did my final stage of interview with the companie's client (out of 4 stages in total) last Thursday.
Client came back with positive feedback at Monday at the end of workday. Today is Tuesday and internal recruiter was supposed to call me to make an offer and discuss starting date.
Now again workday is nearly over and no contact from her. Tomorrow is a national holiday so she will get back to me at best on Thursday.
Goddamnit why it takes so long, if Im starting next Monday I need to prepare myself. Im seriously getting second thoughts such as even about declining the offer if they will try to lowball me. Previous week they really rushed the process and I had to do 4 stages of interviews and this week they are wasting my time. Am I being impatient or what?2 -
Nothing like constantly having to spend 3-5 days of spin up on trying to help another team with their microservices because they have such a severe lack of documentation that I can't just follow a readme to get their projects running. Instead, I have to bug one of their developers to help me get it up and running (because they use non-standard project setups and dependency management), delaying things even more. No matter how much I scream that we need documentation no one makes it a priority.
Did I mention these are microservices written in Golang and I'm a front end developer? And I'm being made to work on back end tasks because we have a crazy high attrition rate and they won't back fill the back end positions.3 -
Some competitions are so unorganized.
So me and my team went for this national level technical paper presentation competition. Our topic was a cyber security topic and they put us under Mechanical branch even though I had informed them about this discrepancy two weeks back. Apparently the girl whom I complained to wasnt on the organising committee although she was the one who was promoting this competition in the first place. Sheer irresponsibility!!3 -
We stopped our daily standups for a few blissful months.
But now they are back.
I will never, ever understand why anyone thinks stopping an entire team of developers from working is a good idea.2 -
I want to stay in the here and now where all the niceties are being added feature wise to everything and still work a decent paying job and get laid :(
wtf !
why do they constantly think they can take more and more and keep rolling everything backwards ! its stupid !
build back better should be code for 'bankrupt everyone and make life shitty and create diseased fucked up people who are incapable of forging human connections and or are scared to and/or are so tired out by a lack of novel thought and experiences their consciousness is just hiding until something new comes along so they don't want to kill themselves everyday'
i mean thanks people
always wanted my entire country to be filled with untrustworthy destructive crazy slaves. -
I once used Wordpress for my portfolio. I now feel dirty. I know there are some who wouldn't admit that they use wp sometimes and that's understandable. I think making my own cms would be better. Has anyone of you here done that? What back-end tool did you use?5
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How do I tell my “senior” co-worker that he’s a shitty person while working in a group , I just can’t tell my manager cos they both are good friends, I’ve tried confronting him but it didn’t make much of a difference. This is really frustrating me because I am always seen as the person who doesn’t know shit cos the senior co-worker keep changing the back end and my code 😓😓😓1
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I joined a startup a few months back, it has four developers apart from me and after I joined and started interacting with them, I could feel that they weren't happy working there, after a couple of months, they became vocal about their dislike, when we were talking about work. I too started experiencing that. Two of them are going to leave next month.
I feel like its starting to rub off on me, I don't have that enthusiasm I used to have, I dread going to the office and overall everything related to the office started to seem negative to me. I feel like I want to get out of this place ASAP.
yeah, most of the things they say are true and I'm not so sure about the rest. Is this how I truly feel?1 -
On Friday, 2 of my coworkers asked for help on a concourse issue, it wasn't building correctly, and they had been trying to figure it out all day. It was an old VB project, which was built very weirdly. We made some progress, but didn't get passed the error. I recommend asking in slack if anyone had gotten the error before, but the refused, saying that they could fix it.
Monday morning, and at standup they mentioned that they still haven't solved the issue and were going to work on it today. I once again mentioned that (blank) could help them.
Monday afternoon, and they are still stuck the same issue they had friday morning. I give up and contact (blank) myself, who mentioned they have seen this error before and shows them how to fix it. Five minutes later and they are back on track, past the issue.
Why are people so adverse to help, it should not have taken 2 days and me introducing them to accept help... 🙃1 -
I told them I can do everything from front end, back end, to iOS and mac app, just not Android. I don't like Android. Now they are assigning Android tasks to me, I am working like shit and very unhappy.
Am I not professional or is this ok?2 -
Back at uni, finishing a degree--
Thinkin of making a things to unlearn before uni because boy, there are alot of practices they teach that arent industry standard
P.s dont use goddamn ids for css effect use classes like everybody else1 -
!dev
The whole corona thing has one really interesting side effect to me..
As a person who lost the hope in humanity, I see how some people react to this. They are young and healthy, not really in danger but they actually stop going to gatherings, pubs and cinemas because they don’t wanna endanger the elders and people with preconditions. They actually write shops that they should put the elders first and stuff like that.
It’s great to see that they care about others.
On the other hand there are people publishing fake news and make people believe that their medications make them more vulnerable to the virus just for fun..
I expected the later one and it doesn’t surprise me.
But the first one, that people hold back to protect others, that’s great to see.1 -
Ever used Camunda?
Their documentation feels like it was written with GPT-3 and they put random hyperlinks in there. And if they are remotely close to something useful in there they are like: "How about this article about something which sounds about right, but will just reference back to this article, because we want to be like Wikipedia and put hyperlinks everywhere".
Also you will get a brain stack overflow while trying to decipher the 50th layer of the documentation to something, some random guy on the internet could explain to you in two sentences.1 -
Finally have an opportunity to move to back end department where I work but because I'm the only front end dev my chances are slim to none. And they refuse to hire anyone else. Does this mean they don't want me to grow?1
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With the move forward with many places trying to rebuild the internet to suit there needs it's time we take the internet back with our own networks, there are many old means to do it what is useful but most of the white paper and software as been blocked or deleted, what a sad world we live in, freedoms have always been a thing of your madness but now they are even removing the feeling of freedom, god I love the world...... NOT
Anyone know of a good and easy set up mesh what will work for windows, linux and mobile devices?1 -
In college right now, it seems that all my peers are way laid back than me and they think that I do a lot of things but I'm really confused whether to get laid back a little or continue working as I do. I know I sound confused right now but I am!3
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Last saturday, the CEO forced us to update one of the services that we are dependent out without any tests... The people responsible for it very much advised against it but they still did it.
Now, nearly a week later. The literal core feature is still broken with no fix in sight and rolling back is not possible apparently.1 -
An programmer guy works at home. His wife ask him to go buy some bread and if they have eggs to buy six. The guy come back from shopping and put the things in the kitchen and go back to work. His wife go in the kitchen and ask him why there are only 6 breads and no eggs!
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what do you when people below you start flexing in front of you and they are your colleagues or people whom you can't completely avoid
They just boil my blood tbh cause i choose not to flex back and destroy their self esteem tho i am clearly way ahead8 -
I just submitted "a lower price found" on GrubHub for an order I just made. Haven't gotten back to me yet but apparently if they agree, they'll give a $15 credit.
I think other services have this gaurantee too... So wondering...
How hard is it to write an app coloring menu prices between all these services...
Could get a lot of credits... And why haven't they done it themselves.
I'm not really up for the task at the moment but basically you just generate a table with all the prices from each service and highlight the ones that are different...
Then profit!!!6 -
So I just watched Them some more, and saw a whole episode which almost to me seems like a fucking snuff film. Depicting the 1800s as being far more dementedly cruel than they already were with people smiling in delight at a 'witch' burning that resembles more the fucked up way people are now, than what I would imagine them back then, which is likely more callous overall.12
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I just woke up from this horrific dream. It was a super dark talented mr ripely style nightmare.
This estranged relative had come back into my life and things were going fine but got weird fast. Eventually we’re at this point where I’ve already half killed then with a hammer and it’s been this insane back and forth/psychological torture as they fade between character. They’re weeping and naked crawling toward me pleading - but it’s way past that.
I’m trying to save my mom and escape - and I can tell they are about to get another wind and charge me. I look down and realize they have no shoes either - so, I spot a porcelain lamp and crash it to the ground and it shatters and fills the space with shards. Their eyes full with rage as they switch character and realize we cannot be manipulated. This is the end. We narrowly escaped as they run across the floor and cut their feet and slam to the ground in shrieking agony. Super scary.
Then I thought... this feels terrible.
Kinda like being on Reddit - or just in a bad comment thread. -
No going back
No forgetting the best
If they are jealous of others forgetting the worst hurt them till they do
No more theft
There is no justification
One round of photos and videos is 12. Years of pay at least
So. Hand it over
50k a year1 -
Idk if this is the right place to ask but I thought Of this and my parents are sick of trying to satisfy me and they said they don’t even know what I’m asking. I know this is an extremely dumb question. Hypothetically, if a plane full of billionaires carrying only cash crashes mysteriously and cannot be found, now that the money is lost, what happens in the economy. Like how do the banks know how much money is gone and what do they do about it. Like mass inflation? Why can’t they just print an approximate Amount of money to fill up the system again, and if so what happens when they find the plane in a hundred years and the money comes back cuz now we have too much? This all came from wondering how they put the new coins with the kings face in without making the economy blow up, like I would assume they take the same amount of money that are idk too old or something and replace it with the same amount of new money but in that case how do they know and what do they do with the old coins now that they’re out of circulation. If anyone can answer my questions pls help. I might reply to your answer with more questions sorry lmao.10
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It's been some months and I've been working with data, I'm in charge of the data migration and after 4 months into the job, they tell me that the data is sometimes transformed but they do not have a tool to validate the data, instead they do it manually.
When I said, that if we do it manually, it'll be prone to human error. My team says that humans make errors.
They're basically checking 2 rows of the database manually and then pray. That's their way of testing/validating the data.
Couple years back when I was in college, we used to talk about code quality or whatever but I don't think that's followed anywhere.
Developers are lazy. That's the fucking truth.1 -
They put me on a new project, asks me if I want to work with A and B technology, tell them I am not interested. Then partner talks me back feeling like he is pushing me. Tell them I still do not want to work with it and they need to find C technology which I have been very clear that I want to specialize in. I know they have lots of projects with C technology but they are doing things difficult for me. Do not want to be like a kid but I need to think about my future. Maybe I should suck it up or tell them goodbye and move on, anyone in similar situation?
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In the dynamic realm of software development, where the user interface meets the complex machinery behind the scenes, Back-End Expertise https://sombrainc.com/expertise/... emerges as the unsung hero. As businesses increasingly rely on digital platforms to connect, engage, and transact with their audience, the prowess of back-end development becomes paramount.
At its core, Back-End Expertise refers to the specialized knowledge and skills required to architect, build, and maintain the server-side of applications. While the front end dazzles users with intuitive interfaces and captivating designs, the back end silently weaves the intricate tapestry that ensures seamless functionality, robust security, and optimal performance.
The Back-End Symphony: Orchestrating Digital Harmony
Imagine a symphony where each instrument plays its part to perfection, creating a harmonious melody. Similarly, in the world of software, the back end orchestrates a symphony of databases, servers, and frameworks, ensuring that data flows smoothly, operations execute seamlessly, and applications respond promptly to user commands.
Back-End Experts are the virtuosos who write the code that makes applications tick. They delve into the intricacies of databases, crafting queries that retrieve and store data efficiently. They architect server-side logic, meticulously designing algorithms that power functionalities ranging from user authentication to complex business processes.
Security as the Forte: Safeguarding the Digital Fortress
In an era where data breaches loom as potential threats, Back-End Expertise becomes a formidable fortress. These experts implement robust security measures, safeguarding sensitive information and ensuring the integrity of digital ecosystems. Encryption, authentication protocols, and secure API integrations are the tools of their trade as they create digital bastions against cyber threats.
Optimizing Performance: The Need for Speed
User experience hinges on speed, and Back-End Experts understand the importance of optimizing performance. Through efficient coding practices, load balancing, and server-side optimizations, they strive to minimize latency and ensure that applications respond swiftly, even under heavy user loads.
Future Trends: Back-End Evolution
As technology evolves, so does the landscape of back-end development. Cloud computing, serverless architectures, and microservices are shaping the future of back-end expertise. Back-End Experts must adapt to these trends, embracing new tools and methodologies to stay at the forefront of innovation.
In conclusion, Back-End Expertise is the backbone of digital experiences. While users interact with the front end, the magic unfolds behind the scenes, where Back-End Experts craft the architecture that defines the reliability, security, and performance of applications. Their alchemy transforms lines of code into seamless digital experiences, leaving an indelible mark on the ever-evolving landscape of software development.1 -
Why are apple so fucking back assward and stubborn when it comes to their app review process?
So, at work I made an app. It's a simple one, but it's an app.
It makes it so that the user doesn't have to enter their credentials to sign in to a system developed on our platform.
If you give it a hard oded config it will only connect to that server, if not, it fetches a list of available servers and the user has to select which they want to connect to.
I've uploaded basically the same fucking app thrice, twice with and once without a config.
Two of them when somewhat smoothly through the review, but the last one has been stuck for almost two fucking months! And guess what it's one of the ones with a config!?!
How is that in any way consistent?
They fill us with shit like "your screenshots aren't representative", so I update them.
They go "this is not an AP for the public", I tell them I give less than a steaming pile of fresh dung from a retarded donkey, the intended users are freelancers, so just fucking greenlight it.
Then they go "your screenshots aren't representative", so I tell them to pound sand or specify which screenshot is wrong or what they think is missing.
How are they so fucking inconsistent with their process? Isn't is this process that they used as of defence for their shittastic monopoly, that they don't want to call a monopoly?
I'm so fucking tired.5 -
I really am uncertain wtf they expected of people as a ticket to a time where everything continues and our lives are on track because other than getting laid alot there was an obvious hiatus from living an affluent lifestyle excepting where I stayed and who I had sex with heh
Seems like they always invent excuses to roll everything back -
It kinda sucks that 8-core cpu and 14-core gpu is starting and that is for $1999 😭
I wish they provided 10-core cpu at that price
But all the ports are back and mag-safe is here also 😁, anyone hovering cursor over the order button ?
It’s so tempting but i will wait for the reviews17 -
man alive do i get sick of their hidden jump out of the bush people creepos.
at least i can code. thats nice
i can code the same crap
and then they can steal it again
and then they can pretend they're being helpful being the lazy evil bastards they are.
and then i can work for 60k a year using technology rolled back too fucking far back because noone is motivated to do shit anymore. -
Last month, I planned to visit a city "Indore" in India. So I contacted some people who are in my LinkedIn connections if they want to meet. They never contacted me back. :( :D