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Me when I'm FREE :
Hmm, I don't have anything to do, let's sleep for 10 hours..
Me when I have to STUDY :
Let's watch that latest episode of Mr. Robot
Let's complete that side-project I started to 10 years ago..
Let's learn something new in Android Development...
Let's scroll devRant..20 -
Let's get rid of the developer training: Pair Programming
Let's get rid of the software testers: Test First Programming
Let's get rid of the project managers: Agile
Let's get rid of the project planners: Scrum
Let's get rid of the system admins: DevOps
Let's get rid of the security guys: DevOpsSec
Let's get rid of the hardware budget: Bring Your Own Device
Let's get rid of the servers: Cloud Computing
Let's get rid of the other scruffy guys: Outsourcing
Let's get rid of the office space: Home Office
Let's get rid of the whole fucking company: Takeover8 -
Non-dev friend : hey I've got a cool idea, we'll create a site where people can post jobs and people can bid for it. We'll name it freelance.com. We gon be rich!!!!..
Me: okay....
Friend: so you in?
Me: No.
Friend: It's really easy, just build it like you built that website you did the other day (talking a landing page he saw me do in a week). In 2 weeks, we'll be millionaires. You'll do all the programming stuff, so you get 30% of the money, I'm the idea guy so I get the other 70%. About that, you in now?
Me: have you heard of odesk, freelancer, jobberman.
Friend: no... Does a freelance site exist.
Me: boy, it's 2016.
Friend: I just thought of it few minutes ago and my other friends thought it was a great idea.
Me: 🙈🙈🙈🙈😶🔫🔫🔫14 -
- Hmmm, react is not as difficult as I thought. Good tool, let's use it.
- Hmmm, Vue is amazing, let's use this instead, much easier.
- Hmmm, Angular 4 is out, let's retire to a deserted island and sell coconut water for a living.10 -
Me: Hey let's do A to help the website.
PO: Yeah that sounds good. but let's do some research about it.
6 months later.
PO: Hay let's do A to help the website.
CTO/CEO/PO's boss: amazing idea. Here's an award and some money for that.
Me: What. The. F...6 -
Strating on a quite big project today because for one, it seems awesome to build it, two, i really need it and three: I don't think i have the skillset to pull this off so it's an awesome challenge/learning thing!
This will be the first time where I'll actually have to make a technical design first because otherwise it'll become a mess.
I'm both super excited and nervous 😁😅8 -
PM: let's make a kick-ass design for this header.
Me: *designs something with funky animations*
PM: hmm.. this is good but let's just follow how 'Reddit' does it.
Me: *WTF* 😫😫😫😫7 -
Fahrenheit? Like seriously? Let's measure my temperature when I'm having fever, great let's say it's 100 degrees of Fahrenheit. And while I'm at it, let's measure how cold it's outside. Splendid, let's make it zero degrees. It's not like anybody would use this super scientific scale anyway, right?
// End of rant.13 -
Supervisor: let's automate this stuff
Me: great! let's do it to last and future proof it. So, as changes happen we can implement in-place upgrades efficiently without taking the system down
Supervisor: well let's not get too crazy
1 -
The DE life cycle of every Linux hobbyist:
1. Let's work with Unity.... it's so blah
2. Let's check out XFCE.... it does its job, but it needs more zing
3. Let's check out KDE...aah, my poor battery.
4. Let's check out LXDE.... Can you be any more boring?
5. Let's check out Pantheon.... This is perfect, but I'm tired of using a tweak tool to even enable minimize and maximize
6. Let's go to Gnome 3...Ah never mind
7. Let's go to Cinnamon... Blurgh, It reminds me of Windows
8. Let's go to MATE....Hmm, Mutiny layout?!! It reminds me of Unity. Wonder if Unity 8 has made any progress!
9. Go back to Step 1.16 -
Guys, please help me answer this intellectual being. The more stupid the answer, the better. Even better is if there is like a fake loooooonnnngggg step by step guide of it. NB: tafadhali == please.
21 -
Game devs: Let's make characters as photorealistic as possible.
Some asian girls: Let's try to look as unrealistic as possible:
11 -
Let's go to the arcade they said. Let's play this game they said. Game.exe stopped working Windows said.
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Let's try something different - Let's have a DevCaption challemge
Best caption gets a updoot spree
Here's the first pic
32 -
What am I doing right now? Scamming scammers.
I'm attempting to build a delicious Windows honey pot for scammers to play in only to be terribly disappointed by how buggy it is.
That's right mother fucker I've rigged this computer to not work on purpose!
Have fun trying to run your shitty programs and steal data that isn't there.
Oh by the way if you want to play in this playground it's www.scammer.info3 -
x comes out.
Team: hey let's rewrite our project using x!
4 months later..
y comes out.
Team: x is so crappy, let's rewrite our project using y!
3 months later...
z comes out...
Team: why did we ever use y, let's rewrite our project using z!
.
.
.5 -
*Android New version released*
Users: Wow! Let's see what are the new features are...
Developers: Shit! Let's see what are the things they DEPRECATED.5 -
The year of 2018 is slowly coming to it end, so how about summing it up in a few keywords ?
I start : Bitcoin, Spectre/Meltdown, GDPR, Facebook-out-Linux-in, A.I., Elon Musk, Corporate fuckups(fb,g..), Cheap & Good smartphones
Just a few random ones, hope you come up with better summary:)17 -
Let's make a WPF apllication... They said.
Let's add a ScrollViewer... They said.
Let's put a DataGrid inside the ScrollViewer... They said.
Let's disable scrollwheel on the DataGrid... They said.
Let's add a UserControl to a ColumnTemplate in the DataGrid... They said.
Let'a put a ComboBox with a custom template inside the UserControl... They said.
Now let's hope nobody tries to use the scrollwheel on the ComboBox.
Now I have to convince somebody that it's pretty much impossible to enable scrollwheel on the ComboBox.4 -
i submitted my first app to the app store yesterday. i built it with flutter, and it's already on the play store.
for some reason - i probably created the app wrong - the app store connect/portal needed screenshots of my app running on an ipad pro. now i don't have an ipad pro, and i can't use an emulator because i don't have a mac for that matter (i have been using codemagic.io for builds). i called friends - they don't have any ipads.
what did i do?
i turned my phone sideways and scaled it to the ipad pro resolution.
it is currently "in review"
🙏let's hope this works8 -
v2.0.22 is now officially LIVE in GMT+2. Congrats and good job everybody!
Let's not fuck this one up, shall we? Let's keep our shit together this time.5 -
Boss: so let's get AWS in to ask their advise on the new architecture, but let's not bother involving the systems architect who actually knows what is going on.
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Can someone explain some of my colleagues that THEY DON'T FUCKING NEED A DIFFERENT SLACK TEAM FOR EVERYTHING!
Want to have some random talk? Let's create a new Slack team
Want to add notifications from Git? Let's create a new Slack team
Want to try some new bot they found? Let's create another fucking Slack team3 -
When you get flown to another city for a face to face interview and lunch! Would you call it a good sign?11
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Microsoft: let's develop a solution that helps *nix users use the best of two worlds! Let's create WSL! And then WSL2!
Also Microsoft: oh, let's randomly pick an IP for the WSL host so that it can mess with VPNs!
https://github.com/microsoft/WSL/...16 -
8years ago - me. "oh let's learn ruby it might be fun?"
"oh nvm let's get into php."
talk about bad decisions?3 -
Me: Let's implement this integration test suite in Python since it has got plenty of rich libraries for accomplishing our goals.
Client: Let's use Node.js instead.
Me: With Node.js, we'll need to handle a lot of it's inherent stuff like asynchronous code flows, promises, etc. That's not what we primarily want to achieve.
Client: Let's use Node.js.
Me: Okay. What potential advantages do you see with Node.js?
Client: Umm.. let's just use Node.js?
Me: FML4 -
Smartphone manufacturers these days, imagine how meetings to come up with ideas for new products go about.
Product manager :ok people,what can we do to make our next smartphone 'different'.
Employee 1: let's add more cameras
Employee 2:Let's kill the notch
Employee 3:Let's include the buzzword AI in all of our marketing
Employee 4:Let's put 8Gb of Ram in our phone
Employee 5:Let's just do all of those things and also give it a screen with a ridiculous aspect ratio and unnecessarily high resolution.3 -
Let's do a REST API interface for our webapplication that is incomplete at funcional level!!!
Let's assist people and companies that can't understand what arguments must be passed, even if we don't know too!!!
This is AGILE!!!!1 -
Last week: "let's build this page this way!"
Me: styles page
One day later: "no, that's build the wrong way, let's build it this other way!"
-_-' -
Microsoft pls fix.
My company chose to use Microsoft Teams and uses various linux desktops.
Let's try Microsoft Teams.
A desktop app? Hell yeah. Let's try it.
Oh wait...
Microsoft delivers a Windows executable for linux users... Fuck
7 -
Reminder to all the nice admins / devs out there who might have an ancient project / device / docker image / ....
https://openssl.org/blog/blog/...
https://letsencrypt.org/docs/...
Shouldn't matter for most things...
If it matters, it might be a very very very good idea to nuke it from the orbit and start fresh. :) ;)1 -
You're not really a dev until you start laughing your ass off at every Hollywood attempt at writing a scene where a "computer whiz" does some amazing "hacking"1
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Me after Linux reinstall: "this is great, now let's get back to work. Let's install the packages, then let's run the test server. What do you mean postgres can't be found? Wait... Fuck. Fuck. Fuck." When you realise that you forgot to backup the test database 😂2
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I realized I probably haven't plugged my useless 14 month old NPM package here.
https://npmjs.com/package/raindeer/8 -
"I don't know what I'm doing. Let's try stack overflow."
*check stack overflow*
"I know what someone else did. Let's try that." -
Team: let's do "X".
Me: we couldn't do "X" because... We should do "Y".
Team: that's why we're saying let's do "Y"
Me: ...
What!!! What are they even thinking ?1 -
Uuugh... 'come let's build a standard with in the company'
Two ( and I kid you not) weeks later, we don't get it anymore let's build a new standard4 -
Codes for 2 weeks
Naw this is a bad idea. Let's revert
While reverting gets distracted by another idea
The other idea also sucks. Let's revert and also finish reverting the first idea pls 😒
3 -
TAP - The Art Project.
Started in my college, been working on it for nearly a decade now and during the pandemic I was able to find co-founders and we built an amazing MVP.
But now I got busy with my new job, which is super fun, tech guy got married lol and design guy is little lost.
But over the years, experimenting with people, ideas, and everything around, my idea evolved into something which is loved by everyone I shared it and I can see a huge potential in it.
But meh! Fuck it. Because I am too bored and would rather order a practice pad and start learning to play drums (my childhood dreams), attend more gigs, and live a happier life.
Because the heart wants what the heart wants :)
For the curious ones, you can test the MVP at https://www.tap.prismo.net
And there are few other side projects that I completed which can be found on my portfolio page
https://www.floydimus.prismo.net
I am just wondering shall I redirect my main URL to my portfolio page or keep it pointed to TAP?7 -
Let's Encrypt's email delivery system uses Digicert instead of Let's Encrypt for TLS 🤔
https://delivery.letsencrypt.org/3 -
In Morning: Let's remove this bug.
*after some time*
"Ok!!! I would solve this at night time."
Night: leave it! Let's work on another project. -
Let's go back to the roots... don't need any frameworks... go pure JS and have control...
15 minutes later... let's build an helper class to manage arrays....
😐😐1 -
Friday afternoon 5:00pm: everything works wonderfully fine, let's go home!!
Monday morning 9:30am: Let's do some more test on the latest code I have wr.... KABOOOOM!!! -
Ok let's see. Who tha he'll created this code... Well well let's rewrite it. 8 hours later. OK now it is done. Let's see who to blaim... :@
O no!! it's me :( -
Hey Fellow devRanters in Jakarta, let's meet up!
Let's have our first devRant meeting?
And join here: https://t.me/joinchat/...26 -
How much of windows 10 you will improve? How? And what would you delete?
(In case you want to delete windows 10: "that will be taken care of by op")8 -
Let's play Russian roulette Developer version?
Let's write a PHP script to randomly drop a table in your database.... Hahahahahw2 -
Marketing in other companies: we found a bug, let's make it a feature!
Our marketing: We found a feature, let's report it as a bug!1 -
My Android professor: "Let's target Android 2.1. What is that compat library Android Studio included? Nah, let's remove it." He's on par with the latest features for sure!7
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Ok, let's put some repo on gitlab, create a new branch to make some awesome features, push a lot of commits over that branch. From the website make some changes, in same files, similar in the position of line of code, but in master, you remember your awesome work, let's. Make a merge, wait there's a conflict, let's solve this, you lost some lines of code after merge, ok let's try with rebase, oh lord, the same result, what to do, what would you do? I've not more ideas 😑2
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time for crowdsourcing awful ideas because bored!
what don't I need? what does literally nobody need? what is a terrible, awful, no good idea that should never exist? let's make it!
I'll go first: a compiler that automatically resolves compilation errors by removing the offending line continuously until it successfully compiles. defaults to quiet mode which does not report which lines were removed.1 -
Me: let's focus on this aws developer - associate course and learn something new..
My Brain: hey look, Prince Harry just got engaged.. Let's read all about UK's monarchy!!!1
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