Recipe for Ice Coffee:
1: Make Coffee
2: Start coding
3: Forget you made Coffee
4: Drink it cold

Playing 'Skip-Bo' with my daughter.
She: "Why isn't there a zero in this game? You know...0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5...."

MY daughter ❤️.

1: Get a dog
2: Name dog Sudo
3: Teach Sudo to fetch my mail
4: Invite Linux-friend over
5: Yell "sudo fetchmail"
6: ?
7: Profit

5 things you will find shocking about asynchronous code:

3.
2.
5.
1.
4.

Some ideas for variable names. Thank me later :))

1. bool sheet;
2. int entionally;
3. char mander;
4. double penetration;
5. string cheese;
6. long schlong;

So I "grade" homework for programming 1 students...
Task was to produce an output like:
1
1 2
1 2 3
1 2 3 4
1 2 3 4 5

...and this was committed!
I really had to hold back laughter...
This looks purposefully obfuscated...

World's most dangerous addictions :

4) Cannabis

3) Methamphetamines

2) Heroin

1) Distro hopping

The 5 stages of debugging:

1. What?
2. Why?
3. How?
4. Impossible.
5. Oh.

1. Go to office!
2. Make coffee!!
3. Start computer.
4. Get to wo.."Windows must restart in order to install some updates".
4. 3 hours later => "Working on updates 68% n/ Don't turn off your PC. This will take a while."
4. Fuck this, I'm going home.

I miss Linux...

Basically my life:
1. Work
2. Game
3. Work on a project nobody will ever use
4. Food
5. Make offensive jokes about WW2

Top 6 programming languages:
6) All
5) Languages
4) Serve
3) Some
2) Purpose
1) C++

Problems with Android development

1. Android Studio is shitte
2. Android API is shitte
3. Gradle is shitte
4. Emulator is shitte
5. My life is shitte

10 Things You’ll Find Shocking About Asynchronous Operations:

3.
2.
7.
4.
6.
1.
9.
10.
5.
8.

(found on twitter by @iamdevloper 😂)

1. Finish my own game
2. Get a publisher
3. Get rich
4. Buy a big house with a swimming pool on the top and get 2 bisex girlfriends

How to hack:
1: Open commandline
2: color 2
3: cd c:/
4: tree
...
5: Profit

pfft, all you bloody 2 space indentation hipsters

4 spaces for life!

PM asks for an estimate on a bug fix, I say 2 hours, he puts down 4 hours, I finish it in 10 mins. Today was a good day :)

Modern web developer Stater pack
1.Mac with 100 stickers on it
2.Love linux but never used it
3.Border 0px
4.Border radius 2.7px
5.sketch+adobe

Learning a new technology:
1. Denial
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Depression
5. Acceptance
6. Ohh, cool feature~

Top 5 social media platforms:

1. devRant
2. devRant
3. devRant
4. devRant
5. devRant

How to waste 7 hours of your time:
1.) Install Visual Studio 2017
2.) Install extensions for it
3.) Wait for it to destroy itself with updates
4.) Reinstall everything

1. Code works
2. Add if statement
3. Code breaks
4. Comment out if statement
5. Code works
6. Uncomment if statement
7. Code works
8. Wtf??

1. Create user on website.
2. Receives mail with username and password.
3. Changes password.
4. Receives mail with new password.
5. Delete account and look for another service.

When you've got 4 personal projects to finish, 2 computers to build, 1 full-time job to wrap up, an online course to complete, Uni starts in two weeks and your family decided it's the perfect time to go on vacation.

It's 2:30 am and this is my life.

1) Build enough confidence to ask a girl out for a date.

2) find a girl to ask for a date.

3) ???

4) profit

Recipe of cold coffee.
Step 1: Make Coffee
Step 2: Start Coding
Step 3: Forget you made Coffee
Step 4: Drink it Cold

Don't say thank you I understand!

*Asks Question on StackOverflow
*Question get downvoted -2
*Replies to my own question with a solution that I found, and it worked
*Reply get downvoted -4

Cries on corner...

Just finished assisting a junior dev with optimizing his code.

What used to take 2+ hours now takes less than 4 mins! 😎

“ 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 , 6 , 7 , 8 , 10 ”

(Microsoft and Apple signing)

10-1 AM - 4 of us got drunk.
2-4 AM - 2 hours straight coding, solving big-ass problems
10 AM - Fucking hangover and python code in a java project!

HTTP return codes cheat sheet :
1** : Hold on
2** : Here you go
3** : Go away
4** : You fucked up
5** : I fucked up

Teaching maths to my niece and instead of 2+2=4, I wrote 2+2==4... someone needs break from coding 😂

What I feel when browsing recent lately.

How to get ++:
1. Get Google Allo
2. Ask question about Siri
3. Screenshot and post
4. ???
5. Profit!

Top 5 reasons to come to Hackathon
1. Experience for your CV
2. Free swags
3. Networking
4. Free swags
5. Free Stickers (swags)

1
10
11
12
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
Lets sort numbers like this!
-Greetings from my file manager!

10 Things You’ll Find Shocking About Asynchronous Operations:

3.
2.
7.
4.
6.
1.
9.
10.
5.
8.

Which are the most frequent for you? Mine is : 2, 3, 4 😂

1.Run into issue
2.Go to Stack Overflow
3.Think of best way to phrase the question
4.Find solution while editing post
5.Bang head on desk

My work day is now:

1. Coffee
2. Code
3. Poop while on devrant
4. Repeat

🙈😝💩

1) Open devRant app
2) Enjoy so many great rants
3) Thinks is enough
4) Quit devRant app
5) Immediately open devRant again without thinking
6) ....

(damn my muscle memory)

Best one minute life hack..
1. Uninstall Facebook Messenger
2. Uninstall WhatsApp
3. Uninstall Instagram, Snapchat
4. Install DevRant.

1. Promise anything, everything to clients
2. Set unrealistic deadlines
3. Devs can't meet deadlines
4. Blame the devs

Anyone?

1. Started to program Python 3
2. Thought of doing a little program just for fun
3. Now 1 1/2 years in developing state with nearly 3000 lines of code and 11 modules
4. Python skills :)

Wikihow: how to start programming.

1: install devRant
2: register for stackOverflow
3: add Quora to you blacklist
4: learn programming!

There is code reuse and then there is stupidity. This npm module has 4 dependents and 2 dependencies.

- Waking up 2-3 hours later than usual.
- Not spending 4 hours per day in travel.
- More freedom.

What fresh hell is this

.replaceAll("(//"?)([^//d]+)(//.?)([^//d]+)(//.?)([//d]{3})(//.?)([^/d]+)(//"?)","$1$2$3$4$5$6$7$8$9")

...who is fucking with me

1) Install Debian 9
2) Select GNOME
3) Hate GNOME
4) Uninstall GNOME
5) Install LXDE
6) Love GNOME

1.) Start a small business
2.) Complete my game
3.) Graduate
4.) Get a good University for Masters

1: Open my IDE
2: Think about how much I have to do
3: Try to do it
4: Eventually switch to YouTube

When you see a Java devotee using Python and they're doing something like this:

array = [1, 2, 3, 4]
for n in range(0,len(array)):
print(array[n])

At least I get to tell them "hey it doesn't have to be so hard just do it like this:"

array = [1, 2, 3, 4]
for n in array:
print(n)

I just can't learn dance moves, every tutorial is like 1, 2, 3, 4 ... 1, 2, 3, 4 where's the freeken first step?

choose any one:
your number of friends is:

1) NaN
2) Null
3) Not defined
4) 0

Alone on valentines?
1: Buy 100s of plastic rings
2: Hide in the kitchen of a fancy restaurant
3: Put rings in glasses of champagne
4: Watch

Me: Dear Boss, what should I do first? Thanks 😇
1. Rush
2. ASAP
3. Urgent
4. Important
5. Priority
6. I Need That Now

1. Buy a road
2. Name it after an sql injection
3. Have mail delivered to you
4. ...
5. Profit... I guess?

1. Better pay.
2. Better Dev work.
3. An xbox/PS4 in office.
4. Better planning.

Weekend plan:
1. I will watch react conf
2. I want to complete vim cheat sheet
3. LFS project is too
4. Netflix
5. ........
...
.
.

Electricity : 😈

Fuck..
😡

0. Get a raise
1. Nove out
2. Learn GoLang
3. Have a threesome
4. More weed
5. Build a blockchain project

2:30 am: Okay, I think I found the bug. I'll try a last compile then I go to bed.
...
4:30 am: sh*t

dev 1: "Use 4 spaces."
dev 2: "2 spaces are better."
dev 3: "No, use tabs!"

My plan:
1. Draw the logo in paper with black marker
2. Scan with the infamous printer
3. Load in GIMP
4. Edit some parts
5. Put some colors
6. Print or save as image file
7. Use everywhere

As I start to do step 2, I noticed something VERY wrong.

FML

1. Finish my degree
2. Get good job
3. Leave current shithole of a country
4. Marry girlfriend

My favorite languages are
1. Python (3)
2. PHP
3. JavaScript
4. Ruby
5. Java

Honorable mention: C++

Can anyone agree?

1) Download version 46 of Firefox as required.

2) Install version 46

3) Open Firefox

4) Firefox then auto updates to version 52

5) Face smash desk and repeat

1 + 2 + 3 + 4 + 5 + “6”

You know that moment you realize you read/write the wrong variable, and that's why u were stuck for 2-4 hours?

That.

Ruby’s fanciness bit me in the butt today. It’s pretty rare, but often confusing AF when it happens.

array = [1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7]
array.count +1 +2
# => 1
What the fuck?

array.count +1 +2 +3
# => 1
What the fuck?

+1 +2 +3
# => 6
Okay.

(array.count +1 +2 +3)
# => 1
What the fuck?

(7 +1 +2 +3)
# => 13
Okay...

array.count + 1 + 2 + 3
# => 13
Alright, so spaces matter here...?

((array.count) +1 +2 +3)
# => 13
But not here!? ... Oh. I think I know what’s going on.

Array#count
Returns the number of elements. If an argument is given, counts the number of elements which equal it using ==

Well fuck me.

Ruby is seeing `array.count(+1+2+3)` instead of `array.count()+1+2+3` since `+1` is a value, not an operator followed by a value as is the case with `+ 1`.

Now, why was I using +1 +2 instead of adding some spaces like I normally would? So they would match what was in the comment next to them for easier reference. Heh.

Future dev, I did this for you! So this is all your fault. :|

how people count

normal people: 1 2 3 4 5 6....
me: 0 1 2 3 4 5 6...
them: wtf u doing, 0 is not included

Windows 7, Windows 8, Windows 10

Now,

Angular 1, Angular 2, Angular 4

What do you guys call the ++'s on the post?
1. Increments
2. Upvotes
3. Plus pluses (lol)
4. Something else

Reply with your choice🦄

how do you pronounce PHP?

1- pe-he-pe
2- pé-hash-pé
3- pe-itch-pe
4- perverted hell poop

Reciepe for cold coffee:
1. Make Coffee
2. Start Coding
3. Forget you made coffee
4. Drink it cold

It's always fun to compare webdesign to car sales.

Client: We want a car with 2 doors.

We: Here is you car with 2 doors.

Client: Why does the car only have 2 doors? This is very limiting and i think 4 doors work way better.

We: Okay fine, here is a car with 4 doors.

Client: Could you please check on the brakes, i think there is something wrong but i don't know what.

We: Ok we checked the brakes and they are working ok. So here is you car with working brakes and 4 doors.

Client: Why didn't you check on the exhaust? The car is generating big black clouds now...

It's never enough

1. Mailserver is down.
2. Write a ticket to provider.
3. Can't get a reponse because of 1.
4. ?????
5. Profit
6. Scratch that. We're a start-up.

For fucks sake if I send you a clearly described 5 step install instructions do not start on step 3! Yes you fucking moron instructions labeled 1,2,3,4,5 should be carried out one after the other! Not in random order.

Seriously, how deranged are you that you have never ever encountered a step-by-step instruction before?!

Don't give me that "oh, should I have started with step 1 first? You weren't very clear about that. I think it is a bit too complicated."

Here are some more instructions:
1. Close your PC
2. Donate it to someone with detectable IQ level
3. Go fuck yourself
4. Please die
5. Yes, start with step 1

!rant
1) Finish your project
2) Decide to localize it
3) Suffer
4) Suffer much more

I have an interview with one of the big 4 in 2 weeks.

The post is for a java dev, they contacted me even though I'm a PHP dev.

I know the interview questions will be in java... What do I do??? :-(

I worked with java for the last time 2 years ago...

Am I the only one who thinks that 6 10 12 14 are even odd numbers and 2 4 8 16 are even even numbers?

How to solve a problem in 7 steps.
1. Google
2. Open links
3. Read
4. Copy
5. Paste
6. Run
7. Repeat until solve

1. Set your podcast player to 0.5x speed
2. Listen to your favorite dev podcast
3. Imagine they're all drunk
4. Profit

Me: what's the square root of 5+7(2*4) / 4?

Him: *takes half a second* about 3.74

Intel i7: fucking loser

Classic Wordpress:

1. Find a problem
2. Throw 2 to 6 plugins on the problem.
3. Admit, that they don't fix the problem either.
4. Implement some crappy workaround yourself.

But: It could get worse. You could use Joomla as CMS. Same shit, but without the available mass of plugins.

story points that equate to hours.
1 = 1 hour
2 = 1-2 hours
3 = 3-4 hours
5 = 6-8 hours
8 = Kill. Me.
13 = Now.

Method 1:
1. Read others' people answers on wk70
2. Apply
3. ???
4. Profit
Method 2:
1. cd <ProjectName>
2. git init
3. dotnet new sln
4. dotnet new console #or webapi/lib
5. code .
6. git commit -m "Initial commit"
7. git remote add origin <github link>
8. git push origin master -u
9. profit

I am currently refactoring my code:
1. 200 errors
2. fixed them!!!!
3. build the solution...
4. wait for the build to complete...
5. 300 errors
6. FML

Top 5 World’s Most Hated Programming Languages

1. Perl

2. Delphi

3. VBA

4. Objective-C

5. PHP

Which one do you hate most?

0-headphones
1-coffee
2-Laptop
3-npm
4-IDE
5-wifi
6-devRant

Not usually a person to rant about spacing and conventions but this is great.

4 devs, all using IntelliJ. Now IntelliJ auto-changes tabs to spaces which is nice, and GitHub doesn’t really care as long as the spacing is consistent. Now here is the fun part: 2 devs have 4 spaces per tab, 1 has 3 spaces, 1 has 5 spaces.
GitHub merge conflicts everyWHERE.

And yes it isn’t the old 2 vs 4 spaces. It’s 3 vs 4 vs 5 somehow

4 stages of using VIM:

1. Survive
2. Fell Comfortable
3. Feel Better, Stronger, Faster
4. Use Super-powers of VIM

console.log(`The see me rollin, they h${2*4}in :P`);

:/
Project i got to work couldn't get worse
1)Legacy code
2)mathematical model based emulation
3)no proper comments
4)deadline approaching

Who holds the #1 Google spot for these queries?

fuck c#: devRant
fuck typescript: devRant
fuck xcode: devRant
fuck product owner: devRant

fuck docker: reddit (devRant is 2)
fuck java: reddit (devRant is 2)
fuck agile: reddit (devRant is 2)
fuck scrum: reddit (devRant is 2)
fuck sql: reddit (devRant is 2)
fuck node: reddit (devRant is 3)
fuck php: github (devRant is 4)
fuck python: github (devRant is 4)
fuck clojure: reddit (devRan't didn't rank on first page)
fuck rust: reddit (devRant didn't rank on first page)
fuck scala: reddit (devRant didn't rank on first page)

fuck ruby: **am I still connected to the company VPN? I might have some explaining to do** (devRant didn't rank)

4x4ghz CPU, 16gb of RAM, 100mbps downstream and 1tb ssd... and it took windows only 2 hours and 4 restarts to install an update...WTF

1) Open IE or Edge
2) Search "download chrome"
3) Click on top hit
4) Download and run installer
5) Enjoy adware

When my headphones are on :
1 - I can't hear you
2 - I don't care
3 - It's your problem not mine
4 - I don't care

1. Get error message
2. Google error message
3. Paste Stack Overflow answer
4. GOTO 1

What do U prefere? ☕

0. Coffee
1. Tea
2. Warm milk
3. Monster
4. Something else

The debugging loop for Minecraft Spigot plugins on a 4GB RAM laptop:
1. Start Eclipse - 1'
2. Edit code.
3. Build plugins - 2'
4. Close Eclipse to make RAM room for Minecraft.
5. Upload plugins to server with FTP - 1'
6. Start server and launch Minecraft - 2'
7. Enter the server.
8. Find bugs.
9. Stop the server, close Minecraft.
[Go back to 1.]

Step by step here:
1. Choosing a stack
2. What to put where(folder structure)
3. Naming stuff(variables, classes etc etc)
4. Finish what I started.

Having an philosophy exam in less than six hours. It's 2 am. Laying in bed, thinking about that stupid DNS bug and how to fix it. I have 4 1/2 hours of sleep left - wish me luck ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Searching for other occurrences of highlighted word in Android Studio

1 - highlight word
2 - CMD+F
3 - Enter

In Xcode

1 - highlight word
2 - CMD + C
3 - CMD + F
4 - CMD + V
5 - Enter

Time spent during a nodejs project:
- 2-4 hours trying to install modules and dependencies.
- 1 hour actual coding!

Me in front of an year old code snippet:

1) "omg, wtf did i write that time?"

2) "i'm going to fix it"

3) after 2 hours lost trying to get new code working... reset from git

4) look around feeling guilty

What i have been doing so far
1) create project
2) search google for help
3) copy & paste
4) compile
If not working GOTO 2, else
5) feel good for days

!rant
User: "Hello, I'd like to hear a torrent joke."
Tracker: "I will refer you to people who can tell you a torrent joke."
Peer 1: "Why d"
Peer 2: "cken "
Peer 3: "road?"
Peer 4: "id th"
Peer 3: "cross"
Peer 1: "e chi"
Peer 5: " the "
Peer 2: "the o"
Peer 4: "To ge"
Peer 1: "side."
Peer 5: "ther"
Peer 2: "t to "

#You never know the sun will rise. I recommend this code style.

a = 2
b = 2
c = a + b
assert a is 2 and b is 2
assert 2 + 2 is 4
assert a + b is c
assert c is 4

So I've taken over a project, well, not really taken over, we've been hired to add more functionality to a Wordpress site.

I have never seen such a messy code in my life... variables have mixed languages, indentation is a mix of tabs, 2, 3 and 4 spaces, camelcase, snake case, short names, long names. ' and ", no spaces after commas (gotta save those bytes doode)
Almost like it has been copypasted from everywhere.

I think I said 10-15 hours for it. I think I will spend a lot more time tidying up this code.

Hey, look, 3 index files!!
index.php
index__backup.php
index__backup_2.php

I don't dare to look into the CSS or JS, but I know I have to

I'm having a DAY.

it's like I'm trying to "2+2=4" and hitting "unknown operator =", figure that out, get "22" back, fix that, then math service is down, redeploy math service, wait 30 minutes, that's up, get "out of numbers" exception, turns out a dependency updated and now I have to register what "2" means, fix that, FINALLY get 2+2 to evaluate, I get 5. Figure that out, get 4! 4!!! FINALLY. Push it. Get 55 on the server. Gets 4 on my machine, getting some random 55 from the server.

1. Make a plan
2. Execute the plan
3. Expect the plan to go horribly wrong
4. Improvise

Truest words to come out of the DC (or any) universe!!!

+2, +4, +8, +16, +32, +64, +128...

Hehe... That's so cool. (:

"Fresher Job"
"Experience: 2-4 years"

Where should I put this stick in? 😤

1. Learn Python
2. Learn C#
3. Use CI in my projects
4. (Not dev related) find a girlfriend

Yesterday night I worked 2 hours on a side project.

This is the first time in 4 months this happens.

Feels so much better man

1. I don't have to use headphones to listen to music. Can listen in speakers and avoid my ears being sweaty
2. No random interruptions from anyone. Interruptions are usually from slack messages and emails which I can decide when to look at
3. Have a solid 1 or 2 hours for coding (because of the above 2 reasons)
4. The time spent in commuting is instead spent on nap or relaxing

1) Heck yeah, great idea
2) Sit like 60 minutes there thinking about a name for the project
3) Build the basics
4) ..meh fuck it

My small collection

2 DD 8" floppy disks
2 MD 2-D 5" 1/4 floppy disks
2 HD 3" 1/2 floppy disks
1 Jaz disk
1 unassembled 3" 1/2 floppy disk
1 PalmOne sticker to learn the letters of Graffiti 2 (I had a M100, but I do not anything related to it anymore.)

That moment when it takes 4 hours to automate a task which would otherwise take 15min all 2 months to do manually.

So all these year's i've been living a lie? I thought my current i7 laptop has 4 cores but according to a lot of articles are saying mobile chips only have 2 cores?

Why does Windows always say it has 4 though?

4 spaces for indenting..not 2.

This has about a 75% chance to push a dev into a full on rampage mode.

JUST HIT THE FUCKING TAB KEY

1) read every pages of the tech's website
2) follow documentation
3) read online tutorials
4) try to use it in currently working some projects

1. Social Networking Sites
2. Office Group Chat
3. Noise Background
4. Poop and Pee

🤖

On Mac, open Terminal...

1. Enter cd ~/
2. Enter emacs
3. Press Esc
4. Enter X
5. Enter either; tetris, snake, or pong
6. Enjoy!

He couldn't sleep for 2 days because he missed her.

I couldn't sleep for 4 days because I missed a stupid ";" in my code. 😟

Them: How long do you need to do this
Me: 2-4 Weeks
Them: Great! You have 6 Days

Step 1: open CMD
Step 2: *color 2*
Step 3: *mode 1000*
Step 4: forget what you actually wanted to do

Priorities:
1. Work
2. Eat
3. Save money
4. Do less of #1
5. Do more of #4
6. Sleep
7. Talk to people
7a. Nevermind - stretch goal

Life as a developer:
1. install cool new lib
2. getting an error
3. google for solutions
4. try one solution => step 2
+ repeat recursively

Expectations VS. Reality : A new Software Project (After all designs and requirements are clear and fixed.)

EXPECTATIONS:
Day 1: Create workspace, Configure tools
Day 2: Implement high priority Feature
Day 3: Write UT and peer review
Day 4: Push first feature to Prod.

REALITY:
Day 1: Create workspace, Setup configurations
Day 2: Still setting up configurations
Week 1: Almost done setting up configurations
Week 2: New migrations issue, again reconfigure before coding starts
Week 3: Take a vacation
Month 2: Finally things are working but God knows what was the issue...

Using a mac from time to time:

1) Open browser
2) Open Gmail website
3) Insert email address
4) Press CMD+Q to write @
5) FUCK!!!

there it is, couting with: 2 instantes of VisualStudio, 3 of chrome, 1 of firefox, 1 of gvim, 1 of notepad.exe, 1 of Spotify and 2 real notepads in the desk.

2 projects, 4 databases and 1 deadline tomorrow 😂.

man, the 2 monitor setup really helps, when you can, go get one for yourself.

Thou shall not declare global vars, neither global wars.
- overtune 4:2

So two guys at the company I work for just quitted, We were 4 in the "dev" department, 2 front end and 2 back end, now we're just 1 front and 1 back, should I try to get a raise?? I've been working steady for 8 months now.

[Me at night]

1 Me: should I sleep?
2 Brain: right after finishing this module
3 Me: <drinking coffee>
4 goto 1

How to LAN -Party:
1: PC is starting normally, resolution fucked up, restart
2: booting for 10 minutes, restart, 2 times
3: repair tools open, 30 minutes system recovery
4: finally PC starts normally, everything works expect the game i want to play-.-

!rant

I want to ask big shaq if 2 + '2' is still 4? Quick js

2, 4, 8, 16, 32, 64, 128, 256, 512, 1024

recent revelation
(16/9)^(1/2)=(4/3)

Tried pomedoro technique copule of time found that this doesn't work for mE. The only things worked is
1) do 4 hours straight
2) take 1 hour break
3) do another 4 hour straight
works much wetter

1. Learn BBC Basic with my dad
2. Learn JavaScript on codecademy
3. Do random shit
4. Learn C#

"Aww yeah, Bootstrap 4 is coming!"

Shut up bitch! I started 2 years back with web development when I was a noob and since then you are coming.

My 2018 goals:
1. Graduate from the Deep Learning Nanodegree.
2. Get better at Python.
3. Learn C++.
4. Learn more about Machine Learning and AI.

Come up with a bad version of flipping a bool's value. (value = !value)

I'll start with a bad way of doing it in C# (.NET):

char[] bca = boolWert.ToString();
if (bca.Length == 4 && bca[0] == 't' && bca[1] == 'r' && bca[2] == 'u' && bca[3] == 'e')
{
boolWert = !bool.Parse($"{bca[0]}{bca[1]}{bca[2]}{bca[3]}");
}
else if (bca.Length == 5 && bca[0] == 'f' && bca[1] == 'a' && bca[2] == 'l' && bca[3] == 's' && bca[4] == 'e')
{
boolWert = !bool.Parse($"{bca[0]}{bca[1]}{bca[2]}{bca[3]}{bca[4]}");
}
else throw new Exception("y e s");

Docker has taken out 2 of our (6) on prem servers.

It's forked 65k processes to run a health check on 4 stacks...

How's your day going?

- have a look at the project
- brake it down into smaller stories
- estimate the time
- multipy it with 1.5
- add 1-3 days of testing
- add 15% project management
- add a 2 days buffer

= be happy with being done in 2 weeks, present it in 4

Me trying to find out what some word means

1. Google
2. Find a good result
3. Notice some other interesting word
4. Repeat

I completed my 4 pull requests for hacktoberfest and guess what all of them got approved. Yayyy!!

So these are the issues which I fixed in hacktoberfest2019.

1. Fixed readme of imba
2. Fixed the script of devTea
3. Added screenshots for the same (2)
4. Helped a friend with a blockchain script.

Thanks a lot!! @devTea, for giving me the chance.

When you have a Database Theory final exam in 2 hours and you're cramming a 1/4 of the module. #uni #student

1. Watch tutorial
2. Build project
3. “I’VE LEARNED NOTHING!!”
4. Call down pox upon instructor and seven generations
5. Rewatch tutorial
6. Get it
7. “Sorry about the boils”

In the middle of 2 critical bug fixes and your boss 'volunteers' you for a meaningless 4 hour training session.....WTF????

Bug requires 2 developers, full-time for 4 days to trace, debug, scratch heads, analyse logs. Third developer helping occasionally. Finally identify fix. Fix is 2 lines. D'oh.

1) Keep improving Java skills
2) Keep learning Python
3) Learn Docker
4) Finally use my Raspberry Pi

1.Learn RegEx
2.Learn C#
3.Finish My Qt app (you ca see it at GitHub)
4.Get a new laptop

me: Imma start working on this project I have been putting off for a week

me after messing with the chrome console for 30 mins:
(5&&!2||(5||30=== 9)+(2||3==-1)+(22&&7)+(4||5&&3===4&&2)+(!5||5))*(!3||3)+([][[]]+{})[+[]+(![]==[])]+([][[]]+{})[+[]+(![]==[])+(![]==[])+(![]==[])+(![]==[])+(![]==[])]+(typeof(()=>{}))[+[]+(![]==[])+(![]==[])+(![]==[])]+([][[]]+{})[+[]+(![]==[])+(![]==[])+(![]==[])]

1. Exporting fat jar
2. Transferring to cluster using WinSCP
3. Running it in the cluster.
4. Find a small bug.
5. Repeat

I HATE IT

Todo list when you tell someone you are developer:
1. Fix slow computer
2. Remove virus.
3. Help with Microsoft Word
4. Check why printer is not working

Reciepe for cold coffee:
1. Make Coffee
2. Start Coding
3. Forget you made coffee
4. Drink it cold

1. Linux. Mint, to be precise.
2. prolly would be bash
3. rest of the GNU toolset
4. curl

Best strategy for getting unstuck... 2 oversized 4 wheel drives in case one gets stuck.

Q) Real Programmers count from ......?
1) 0
2) 1
3) 😪
4) 😎

Epic comment:

1+2+3+4+....infinity = -1/12
SRC: Numberphile

Dear god, id like to file a bug report(see attached video)

Hate leaving work feeling useless for only writing 5 lines of working code today.

4 hours of meetings, an hour of calls, 2 hours to find 2 annoying bugs and the rest waiting for an api throttle limit so I can test again.

Hoping tomorrow is better!

When in doubt shroud your spout. Or just use parentheses!

1 << 2 + 3 << 4

I might be pushing my 4 years old macbook pro too hard with 2 IDEs, 1 instance of datagrip, and tons of open browser tabs, all on 4gb of RAM..

1. Wrote super complex snippet w/o comments.
2. Commit & push.
3. Read code after 1 month
4. Ask yourself how you wrote that.

While I was exploring multiplication tables I stumbled on something cool.
Take any power of 2 on the multiplication chart.
Now look at the number in the bottom left adjacent box.
The difference of these two numbers will always be a Mersenne number.
Go ahead. Starting on the 2's column of a multiplication table, look in the bottom left of each power of 2 and get the difference.

2-2 = 0
4-3= 1
8-5 = 3
16-9=7
32-17=15

etc.

While the online journal of integer sequences lists a lot of forumlas, I just wrote what came to mind (I'm sure its already known):
((2**i)-(((2**i)/2)+1))

The interesting thing about this is it generates not only the Mersenne numbers, but if you run i *backwards* it generates *additional* numbers.
So its a superset of mersenne numbers.

at i = 0 we get -0.5
i=-1 -> -0.75
i=-2 -> -0.875
i=-3 -> -0.9375
i=-4 -> -0.96875

And while this sequence is *not* mersenne numbers, mersenne numbers *are* in this set.

Just a curious discovery is all.

1. Get more fluent with c#
2. Move together with my girlfriend
3. Get my band started after a 2 year break
4. Increase my salary
5. Decrease my worked hours (I have to many thinks I really enjoy doing)
6. Finally ban JQuery from my workspace for all time

1) search a project on github
2) read its documentation and decide if it's worth it
3) read contribution guide lines
4) contribute
5) start at 1)

#1 hand in my notice
#2 start my own company
#3 enjoy work
#4 make a metric shit-ton of money (contributes to previous point)

How’d y’all celebrate 4/20?

I cried for 2 hours, ate some pizza rolls, and bought an orca shirt

1. Question how programms are actually made
2. By C learning book
3. ?
4. Profit

My system needs 2 gb of RAM when 4 gb is installed and 6,5 GB when 16 GB is installed. Any ideas? Running idle system, just everything I usually use.

when you have to validate an email address to fit the requirements of some stupid mail software

(^$|^([^<>()\[\].,;:\s@!&#$%+'{}|~*="]+(\.?[^<>()\[\].,;:\s@!&#$%'{}|~*="]+)*))@((25[0-5]|2[0-4][0-9]|[01]?[0-9][0-9]?)(\.(25[0-5]|2[0-4][0-9]|[01]?[0-9][0-9]?)){3}|(([a-zA-Z\-0-9]+.)+[a-zA-Z]{2,})$)

I'm not even sorry.

var todays_tasks = 4, completed = 0;

while(completed < todays_tasks) {
fixTask();
completed++;
todays_tasks += 2;
}

Took a task with 3 story points ( mappable to ~2-3days) and wondered why it was so much more than the estimation. I expected to finish in 2 to 2 1/2 days but needed 4. Afterwards I just realized that I accidentally did more then needed and finished two upcoming stories as well, each 2 SP so 7SP for everything.

Feeling jumped from "man I could be faster" to "man that was really fast".

It feels like a fuck up, however, it is victory

1. Hard reset his Android phone

2. Install the same junk apps again

3. Complain why the phone is lagging

4. goto 1.

so the PHP Standards Recommendations part two (PSR-2) says
"Code MUST use 4 spaces for indenting, not tabs."

and i feel devastated

How the fuck 4 months of design(2 designers) can be developed with 2 months of development work. (1 developer)

BRILLIANT PROJECT MANAGEMENT IDEA

Dear last dev, thanks 4 leaving little 2 no //comments as u possibly could. 😑😣😢😠

Please //comment ur code!!

You can kill me now...

.entry-item
position: relative
display: inline-block
float: left
width: calc(25vw - (204px/4) - (320px/4))
height: calc(25vw - (204px/4) - (320px/4))
overflow: hidden

@media(max-width: 1600px)
width: calc(33.333vw - (204px/3) - (320px/3))
height: calc(33.333vw - (204px/3) - (320px/3))

@media(max-width: 1440px)
width: calc(33.333vw - (48px/3) - (320px/3))
height: calc(33.333vw - (48px/3) - (320px/3))

@media(max-width: 1200px)
width: calc(50vw - (48px/2) - (320px/2))
height: calc(50vw - (48px/2) - (320px/2))

@media(max-width: 1024px)
width: calc(50vw - (48px/2))
height: calc(50vw - (48px/2))

@media(max-width: 720px)
width: calc(50vw - (24px/2))
height: calc(50vw - (24px/2))

@media(max-width: 580px)
width: 100%
height: calc(100vw - 24px)

Okay so I am a computer science student, and here's what my parents and relatives think I do-
typing random letters and numbers into the computer system until it magically turns into some working mobile app, which is their expectation. While I am coding some addition program just for them to see 2+2=4.

1) move
2) finish uni
3) learn more about the 6502, the nes and finish my game
4) get a decent job

My best mentor was at my first job at IBM. The senior dev took 2 weeks to pair program with me and get me up to speed on all the applications, tips and tricks, and the different legacy codebases. I learned more in those 2 weeks than my entire 4 years at college lol.