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"Don't use git, it is too complicated and we don't have time for this."
2 days later the same person made changes directly on the FTP which I later unknowingly overwrote.
Take that you imbecile!13 -
After job Interview,
We will come in contact with you later that week.
*Later that week*
You've got mail
Highpayingjob@gmail.com
Job interview
You didn't get the job.
Your didn't Meet out requirements.
Sincerely us.
*5 minutes later*
Highpayingjob@gmail.com
Job interview
We must apollogize, we've sent you the wrong mail.
Sincerely us.
*5minutes later*
Highpayingjob@gmail.com
Job Interview.
You werent good enough at our Interview.
Sincerely us.
*Me*
What. The. Fuck.
Just happened...
WHAT THE FUCK!
2 REJECTIONS FROM THE SAME COMPANY?! IN JUST 10 FUCKING MINUTES!24 -
Me-Hey, did you install linux?
Friend:- Uh, No. Currently using Ubuntu, I'll install Linux later.18 -
Shit... I just got my phone stolen. Realized it 40 seconds post factum [left it at the shop counter and someone took it].
20 minutes later called the police [cuz I had to get home and use wife's phone].
5 min later poluce arrived
10 min later they got all they could from shop's security officer.
Police officer asks me to login my samsung acc on his phone. 2 minutes later we are on the way to the exact location my phone is at.
15 minutes later officer hands me my samsung 😁
got my phone back in less than an hour after theft.
maybe... Ummm... Maybe all this tracking thing is not that bad...?13 -
In other news:
Today a team of a total of six developers helf a 45 minute meeting to decide upon the name of a class.
It was later made clear that the class would be renamed anyway later in production.6 -
DataBase not approved, just use spreadsheet they said...
65487456456 errors later...
Many litres of blood later...
866 brackets just for the closing
528 ifs
20 -
Testing a raspberry pi 4 as a computer driving our 4k dashboards' screen. Temperatures are constantly 80-90C.
Me: STEP ASIDE! MAKE WAY FOR A HOTFIX!
Rpi: aaahhh, 42C -- now we're talkin!
8 -
Manager: "Pls deploy the changes ASAP."
Me: "Right away."
Me: *creates pull request*
... 5min later ...
GitHub: "Some checks haven't completed yet."
... 45min later ...
GitHub: "Some checks haven't completed yet."
Me: *looks into delay*
CircleCI: "Partial System Outage"
——
(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻2 -
Window...update available... Later
And now ?
Later
And now?
Later
And now?
Later
And now?
Later
And now?
Finish my day, do it fucker but tomorrow you need to work
Today ... Bootloop
Mother fucking ☮️ of shit5 -
Finding the bug. The usual flow:
"Omg! I think it's a bug in the compiler"
10 minutes later:
"OK, it surely is a bug in the runtime"
20 minutes later:
"I'm certain this is a bug in the core library"
2 hours later:
"Oh, it's a bug in my code. Again, as usual, I'm the idiot. Stupid world."1 -
Let's make something in angular sounds like a great idea.
6 months later
Let's port everything from angular to react as angular 2 is a complete rewrite.
Another 6 months later.
I think i like the simplicity of vuejs.
Lets try that now. 😂😂😂1 -
Playing Warcraft and similar games prepared me for understanding Classes and Instances in Object Orientation later.
5 -
Buying courses in Udemy (or similar), is like paying for a gym membership.
Sure there are some who actually use it. But the vast majority is like: "Now that I paid for this, I'm sure I'll get around to using it..."11 -
Known IPs for github (add to /etc/hosts)
192.30.253.113 github.com
192.30.253.113 ssh.github.com
more on https://webcache.googleusercontent.com/...9 -
piece of code: *not working*
me: okay, i can try this again later
me: *comments it out*
4 hours later
me: omfg why are there so many comments??? :( -
Client: I want you to build me a website.
Then makes an order on freelancing website.
Me: Okay, Sir. Can you send me your specifications, please?
No reply.
2 days later
Me: Hello, sir....are you still interested?
A week later
Me: Sir.
Me: Sir.....
No reply
2 Weeks later
Me: Sir......
No reply
Client: Oh, sorry.(Then gives some lame excuse) Okay I will send you the specifications.
Me: It's Okay. Waiting for it.
A week later
Me: Sir, you forgot to send me your specifications.
No response.
#Life of a freelancer.....No stability or security or decent clients.10 -
*peacefully coding*
Family: can you help me connect to WiFi?
*5 mins later*
Friend: help, how do I download this program?
*5 mins later*
Family: fix my computer, it’s really slow!!
When did I go from programmer to IT help desk?4 -
Old story.
Colleague: "I'm gonna update some tables and stored procedures later"
*phone rings two hours later*
Colleague: "Hi! Just wanted to tell you I accidently dropped all our production databases. Have fun recovering them 😊"
Well shit.8 -
Let's comment out this block of code so later we know we have this feature and bring it back if we need it.
Later: commented code everywhere, literally everywhere!!! Shit7 -
Heck yeah, I finally have a Raspberry Pi Zero. It's so cool and small and cheap and I'm gonna make so many groundbreaking things with it!
*20 minutes later*
O, nice, it comes with Kodi. I suppose that's good enough for now.
*3 months later*
chirp...chirp...3 -
🍰
Today I navigate the devRant oceans for the 157,680,000 second.
Who knew this place would be still pumping some of the greatest devs I've come to appreciate so many years later, it's not the vibrant place it once was, but it's still full of hidden gems.1 -
React.js WHY WONT THE F%#&ING STATE CHANGE????
3hours later you realize you forgot curlybrackets...9 -
Task estimated for 2 days
*Half day later*
🤡 : Have you done it?
Me : No, I told you it would take 2 days
*Day later*
🤡 : Have you done it? Do you need any help?3 -
Open terminal.
Type "telnet towel.blinkenlights.nl"
Press enter. Sit back and enjoy.
Thank me later.11 -
What an ending of 2017 has been for me:
Bought a jacket for 100; a week later it's 79
Bought a mouse for 35, two days later it's 15
But somehow I got paid in Bitcoins.3 -
On highschool I took a special major in which we learned various computer and mathematics skills such as neural networks, fractals, etc.
One of the teachers there, which for me was also a mentor, is a physician. He taught us python which he didn't know very well (he wasn't that bad either) and science which was his true passion.
My end project was to try to predict stocks market using a simple neural network and daily graphs of 50 NSDQ companies. The result reached 51% prediction on average which was awful, but I couldn't forget the happinness and curiosity working on this project made me feel.
Now, 5 years later, I have a Bsc and finishing a Msc in Computer Science, and would sincerely want to thank this mentor for giving me the guts and will to accomplish this.7 -
x comes out.
Team: hey let's rewrite our project using x!
4 months later..
y comes out.
Team: x is so crappy, let's rewrite our project using y!
3 months later...
z comes out...
Team: why did we ever use y, let's rewrite our project using z!
.
.
.5 -
Me: Coding...
*Email pops up*
*Checking email*
2 hours later..
Me: Still answering dozens of emails..4 -
YouTube: new rap video?
Me: menu > not interested.
Later...
YouTube: new rap video?
Me: menu > not interested.
Later...
YouTube: new rap video?
....
I get gold from YouTube's algorithm sometimes, but it should know by now that I couldn't care less about new rap videos.13 -
Wrote some code that solved a program in a semi unique way for the codebase. As in not oft used functionality of language.
Some time later... This might be hard to understand. Maybe I should do a different way.
Some time later... No, I will leave a comment to describe what is going on.
Some time later... That comment is kind of cryptic. Maybe should rethink.
Some time later... No, if the next dev doesn't know how this works then they should learn how it works. (reasoning here is that the functionality requires a knowledge of internals of language)
Some time later... Also, if nobody else gets this then they have to ask me how it works. Job security?
Some time later... STOP THINKING ABOUT THIS CODE AND MOVE ON!6 -
Declined a job offer with a startup, partly because of imposter syndrome. Applied for position as programmer, showed up for interview and got cold feet when it turned out they actually wanted/needed a senior programmer/chief technology officer and offered me the position after having asked me no technical questions, seen none of my code or previous projects.
Still, it was a job that paid money... And I'm still jobless two months later :(7 -
Me: We should organize our code before it gets out of hand.
Team: Maybe later
Team, 4 days later: WTF why can’t I find anything in this 1000+ line main.js file???4 -
Me: Can I talk to you for a sec?
Boss: Sorry, can we do that later? I'm busy right now.
Me: Sure.
And later never comes 😑11 -
Long story shot,
I was the coder of a time machine and a bug took me 10 minute to the past. 10 minutes later I got to the same bug and got teleported again. This continued a while. I woke up later.4 -
New AltRant update!
You can join the TestFlight here: https://testflight.apple.com/join/...
New Features:
- Weekly Group Rants are here! Now you can finally receive news about and take part in Weekly Group Rants through AltRant.
Other changes:
- Updated the SwiftRant library to v2.0, an update that was long time coming. Thanks to @Lensflare's contributions and suggestions for the SwiftRant library, both of us improved the quality of the library by a metric fuck ton, and more improvements are still on their way.
Known Issues:
- Downvoting is (still) broken. this issue will be fixed in a later update.
- Some of the layout in the Subscribed feed is a little broken. This will be fixed in a later update.
- The Profile screen's small title flickers in and out of existence under some circumstances. This will be fixed in a later update.29 -
So... C++... Yeah.
> Manage to get a MinGw compiler working in VSCode, and all is "well and good".
> Have difficulties installing SDL, follow tutorial verbatim.
> Compile error.
> 7 hours later no progress.
> 10 hours later no progress.
> 16 hours later no progress.
*Throws laptop at wall*3 -
Client: This had to be super urgently, like last week!
Me: Ok I'll have it done in 4 hours.
Me: *3 hours later* You should find this has been done pending your approval.
Client: *3 weeks later* yeah not bad, thanks. This needs to go live now! -
Sent my cv through a local job finder website, 2 days later got an interview, 2 days later got a technical interview, 2 days later I was already sitting on my new desk
-
@dfox I would love to have a "save for later"/ bookmark feature. I am seeing so many great things here and I'd love to access them later. Maybe something you could implement some day?
Cheers mate!3 -
Me: ok, time to archive this shit and publish :D
Xcode: ok. Archiving started
10min later archiving done
Publishing to app store connect,
5 min later, sorry, we can't publish this cuz u haven't changed the build number from 2 to 3¯\ _(ツ)_/¯
Me:😠ok, whatevs, let's do this, archive
Xcode: ok, archiving started
10min later, archiving done!
Me: click next to upload to app store connect, 5 min later...
XCODE: SORRY, U CAN ONLY PUBLISH ON XCODE GM'S TO APPSTORE CONECT
Me:😤 OMG, OK 3rd time is the charm...
So now xcode has started archiving, I hope nothing happens again 😬6 -
Oh, it's finally done and works well!
Oh, let me just optimize that a little... And probably rename this...
5 minutes later:
Shit it does not work now.
10 hours of debugging later:
I'll fix it later
To all new devs:
Commit more regularly -
Me: Man, I will never figure this bug out...
Me(5mins later, after solving the bug) : Hell yeah!
Me(10 mins later) : I will never figure this bug out1 -
Why fix tomorrow, what you can write properly today!
Seriously, why does everything have to be [M]otherfucking [V]omit [P]rojectiles and dealt with later when it falls apart, rather then spending that extra few hours / days making it fucking stable now, instead of months some where in the future.
Excuse me, I have yet another foreseeable fire to put out.1 -
I stay up very late. It’s gotten later and later as life goes on. I’m tired of being tired. It’s so exhausting.1
-
I have this login page on my app. A user (a number of them actually) told me that they can't log in because the app tells them to "login in later". 😨
Is my button for deciding to login later so poorly designed that it looks like a message?
And the only way you can log in later is by pressing the frikin button, how does a person, with a smart phone tell me for the second time that its telling them to log in later
12 -
"Got a new soundcard yay, lemme Install it!"
*5 mins later*
"why won't it give me sound ffs, the input works just fine"
*5 mins later*
"Great, sound output works"
*taps mic*
"oh ffs..."
*5 mins later*
"yay, input now works"
*puts on some music*
"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME WHINEDOWS!?"5 -
In the middle of coding: "Too into code to document properly. Will document later."
Two weeks later:"What the actual fuck is this code doing?"
2 -
setTimeout(() => {
// some temporary fix, will solve later
}, 0)
...aaaand it stayed there for eternity.6 -
I became storage addicted… started with a 240 GB SSD + a 2 TB HDD... two years later added a new 1 TB SSD, a few months later when the HDD died changed it with a 4 TB one… a few days later I bought a 10 TB NAS (80% off on Amazon, too cheap not to buy).
Now I have 15.24 TB and still thinking about changing that 240 GB SSD with a 2 TB one.
I need help.
10 -
Coding along, frustrated already, need to restart computer to test something.
Of course im running on Windows and then I realize I have no restart opinion, the only one that exists is "update and restart"
*sigh*6 -
Just got into office and saw a group email about a recently released feature.
Apparently, it creates a lot of connections which it never closes. This could hang the server since it can only handle a large but finite amount of active connections.
Well the dev said: I will optimize later
My thoughts: later = min(never, production blows up) -
Started to refactor a class. An hour later -
"hmmm this little bit of code that uses the new refactored class could do with a bit of work". An hour later
"hmmm this little bit of code that uses the new refactored class could do with a bit of work" Eight hours later
"Shit, I've almost rewritten the damn application" !!! -
Famous developer sentences #1:
"I leave it like that for now and refactor it later"
It will definitely never going to happen! ;)3 -
For the people who can't sleep. It looks easy, but there's smth in it what makes it hard. Sooner or later you'll fail. Not even generated with my advanced sudoku generator. This one is generated by my sudoku js widget what does a bare minimal of complexity in its generated puzzles. Let me know if you're able to solve it
8 -
A colleague is walking me trough some of the source code because we try to fix an issue.
colleague: Oh we don't use this anymore
Me: ...
LATER
colleague: This part we should refactor someday
Me: ...
LATER
colleague: Oh I think this is old code and does not exist anymore.
Me: .. .. ...
Great Colleague BTW :)
PS: fix will be posted Later.3 -
Picking up some uncomment code:
var_dump() and console.log() everywhere
1h later: shit I think I lost it again...
2h later: It was a 2-3 lines fix..
fml1 -
Work from home, it doesn't stop the procrastination but it makes it less of a problem. Start a bit later, finish a bit later.
-
Today: FUCK RADARE
5 minutes later: FUCK GHIDRA
2 minutes later: God bless both of these wonderful programs, and I finally think I understand what is going on.
2 minutes later: Fuck this, I hate everything, I'm going back to studying hardware shit.1 -
Welcome to our development process! Where we come up with a project idea when we have two upcoming projects, have a late night writing an 16 page design document, to later cancel the project two months later.4
-
[slack]: here's a nice workspace name. Let's take it.
Workspace started to be unusable (constant refresh). Ticket sent.
[us]: We should delete it and create it again.
Few minutes later - workspace name unavailable. Ticket sent.
(48h later)
[slack]: my precious!!!
1 -
Our current project...
First three sprints... going fine and slow get used to each other.
Later sprints get more of a clear scope. With a deadline a couple of months later. The team raises some red flags with problems.
Seems like the PO/PM doesn't get it or ignores it.
More sprints later with more confrontations. PO/PM still doesn't get it.
Team introduces a new theme song
https://m.youtube.com/watch/...
Hopes she gets it now . . . -
I think I'm in love.
Can you legally marry a computer program? Because I sure would like to propose to git.
When I read the various "What do you regret not doing sooner? Starting to use GIT" rants, I though meh, it cannot be that amazing. But it is, it goddamn is.
GIT already managed to save me ~three days of headache, and possibly prevented me from degrading my AI. And all that on the first day of usage!
I think my life has become at least 30% easier today^^3 -
When client budget is less than the time needed to do a good jobs.
Happens more than I like.
"We’ve all said we’d go back and clean it up later. Of course, in those days we didn’t know LeBlanc’s law: Later equals never."
-Clean Code1 -
Rather than one per in 2 hours, there should be a daily restriction. Because we when I'm in, "the code doesn't make any sense" mode, I'd want to make multiple rants :p
-
me: alright, let's update Ubuntu disco
*a few moments later*: disco-updates.tar.gz.gpg missing
me: (ಥ ͜ʖಥ)27 -
I started programming in Basic. Years later I was in a shop and asked my dad to buy me a book "to create games". He bought me a Javascript introductory book. Never got after chapter 1, though years later I regretted it...
-
Writes 4 years worth of CRM code.
Forgets TimeZone Support.
1 Week later, supports TimeZone.
REFACTORING! -
As far as is can remember, we always had a family PC on which I started later on playing some games (win 98 later xp which finally died last year).
The first PC I got for myself was an old win 95 from my neighbour which he got me for my 9th birthday. At that point I started experimenting all kinds of things, first games and later I started to modify things to see what it would do 😅 -
Dear Dark Side #5
Don't respect updates, save your company:
Create restore points on your colleagues machines.
6 months later, restore those points.
6 months later, restore those points. -
It doesn't work. Wait, it might be this. Yay, wait.... it doesn't work. Who cares, people won't notice. I'll fix it later. 1 year later, maybe later. 1 more year, maybe later.4
-
HAD a Happy morning.... had my coffee, started coding, lets say it was a productive morning.... then the boss called in the afternoon, then called again 5 min later, then called again 10 min later, and then called again 5 min later.... i had no will to continue coding for the rest of the day.....
-
So this lockdown gave me time to think and strategize on how to run my software business more efficiently
Launch the model
3 days later remodel the structure
Launch it
3 days later review
Rectify
Redesign draft a new strategy
Review launch it -
Aaaand going through recruiter hell again! Not even 1 hour later i already receveid 10 phonecalls.3
-
Asp.Net MVC core
Me: this is really cool scaffolding out models.
1hr later: This really sucks have to bind models
1hr later. This is awesome only one nav bar to worry about.
1hr later this is total shit controller inside controller.
1 hr later wow I love MVC
Anybody can relate++
Feel like I'm loosing my mind. -
Keep scrolling on facebook while expecting there is a message from someone.
Then later, projects delay
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