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Search - "#programmer"
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Stop f*cking calling me minority or part of a underrepresented group. Yeah I noticed I am one of the only women on a conference. I DONT CARE, I AM A PROGRAMMER NOT A SPECIAL SNOWFLAKE. Hire me for my work, not because you want you company to be more diverse.50
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Things I've learned throughout my 5 - 6 years as a programmer.
- StackOverflow is full of assholes.
- CMS's are for weaklings.
- The best feeling about waking up in the morning is figuring out how to solve that error in your code.
- You no longer think about normal people things. Your mind is full of code.
- You're practically a computer.
- ALWAYS backup and save your stuff or you WILL regret it. Enable autosave if possible.
- RIP your social life (if your friends don't know squat about programming)
- Darkness is better.
- Being a programmer is amazing.26 -
Something which I felt inspirational.. As a programmer or as a Human being, it's our duty to teach others what we know well !
(My Personal opinion)36 -
I got my first job as a programmer... for a salary twice as big as we had at home for four people. I'm f***ing excited!
Wish me luck :)14 -
A programmer is walking along a beach and finds a lamp. He rubs the lamp, and a genie appears. “I am the most powerful genie in the world. I can grant you any wish, but only one wish.”
The programmer pulls out a map, points to it and says, “I’d want peace in the Middle East.”
The genie responds, “Gee, I don’t know. Those people have been fighting for millenia. I can do just about anything, but this is likely beyond my limits.”
The programmer then says, “Well, I am a programmer, and my programs have lots of users. Please make all my users satisfied with my software and let them ask for sensible changes.”
At which point the genie responds, “Um, let me see that map again.”4 -
A programmer and a business analyst are sitting in the break room one day eating lunch when suddenly the microwave catches fire. Thinking quickly, the analyst leaps up, unplugs the microwave, grabs the trash can, fills it with water from sink, and dumps the water on the microwave to put out the flames.
A few weeks later the two are again having lunch in the break room when suddenly the coffee maker bursts into flames. The programmer leaps up, grabs the coffee maker, shoves it into the microwave oven, and then hands the trash can to the business analyst, thus re-using the solution developed for the previous project.4 -
A physicist, an engineer and a programmer were in a car driving over a steep alpine pass when the brakes failed. The car was getting faster and faster, they were struggling to get round the corners and once or twice only the feeble crash barrier saved them from crashing down the side of the mountain. They were sure they were all going to die, when suddenly they spotted an escape lane. They pulled into the escape lane, and came safely to a halt.
The physicist said "We need to model the friction in the brake pads and the resultant temperature rise, see if we can work out why they failed".
The engineer said "I think I've got a few spanners in the back. I'll take a look and see if I can work out what's wrong".
The programmer said "Why don't we get going again and see if it's reproducible?"1 -
A programmer puts two glasses on his bedside table before going to sleep. A full one, in case he gets thirsty and an empty one, in case he doesn't.4
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im a programmer.
Moms : Son, please fix my phone
Me : what the...
Moms : Cmon ur the IT guy right?
Dad : My laptop must be broken, can u fix it ?
Me : i can't..
Dad : ur degree is useless
Me : ....
Friend : hi, ur the IT guy right ? can u help me ?
Me : Sure ...
Friend : please hack my BF facebook account..
Me : *face Palm.17 -
Being a programmer:
If you ain't questing your life from time to time, you are not doing it right.4 -
I am a programmer, and if you ask me to fix your pc, I accept the challenge... After all, I can Google a problem and implement a solution like no other, you are right to have come to me.5
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A programmer was walking along the beach when he found a lamp. Upon rubbing the lamp a genie appeared who stated "I am the most powerful genie in the world. I can grant you any wish you want, but only one wish."
The programmer pulled out a map of the Mediterranean area and said "I'd like there to be a just and last peace among the people in the middle east."
The genie responded, "Gee, I don't know. Those people have been fighting since the beginning of time. I can do just about anything, but this is beyond my limits."
The programmer then said, "Well, I am a programmer and my programs have a lot of users. Please make all the users satisfied with my programs, and let them ask sensible changes"
Genie: "Uh, let me see that map again."1 -
"Programmers are persons that convert caffeine into code". Every time i see this quote, i ask myself: Am i the only one? (non-coffee drinking programmer)30
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I am a hobby programmer. I just got rejected by the biggest crush of my life. I guess I'm stuck with my stupid wothless fucking life writing code. How fucking exciting....22
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Before marrying a programmer, give him a computer with low internet speed.
Then you can understand his real behaviors and ethics. :))2 -
Saw an add on my fb feed:
"We will make you a programmer in 6 weeks" - course in programming.
6 f*king weeks! I've been studying 5 years, wrote down butt loads of code, debugged billions of bugs, read hundreds pages of documentation and I wouldn't call my self a full developed programmer.
But hey, those fu*kers will make you a programmer in 6 weeks!15 -
I know a guy, about 50 years old. He is a self-taught programmer since he was young, and he has always used Visual Basic (never anything newer than VB6).
He once needed to interface with a web application I wrote, so I asked him to send me a POST HTTP request. He didn't know what I was talking about. No notion of REST, sockets, HTTP, nothing.
The he showed me his code. Actually, his codes. He had multiple copies of the project, one for each version, and he even kept multiple variations of the software in different separate folders. He probably doesn't know what "version control" even means.
You think this is messy. You didn't see the actual code (it's a huge application!).
Spaghetti all over the place. Meaningful variable names, what are they? Default names for the controls, like button1, button2, etc, with forms with more than 30 buttons and text fields. This was the most incomprensibile code I have ever seen.
You might think that this guy is just a hobbyist.
No.
He sells his applications. To companies. They are obviously full of errors, but they buy them.
Now, if you're still with me, two questions come into my mind:
- why?? I hate this, because it's impossible to prove to a non-technical person that this is *not* software development.
- how do I know that, to someone else, I am not like him? How can I be sure that I know and will know what needs to be known?4 -
The Absolutely True Story of a Real Programmer Who Never Learned C.
I have a young friend named Sam who is quite a programming prodigy. Sam does know C! I need to make this clear: he’s not the titular programmer.
But a couple years ago Sam told me a story about a different programmer who never learned C, and I liked it so much that right on the spot I asked his permission to repeat it. (I could never just steal such a tale.)
Sam wasn’t always a programmer—actually he started in his later teens, in part because he was more of a jock, and in part because he was related to programmers and wanted to do his own thing. But, like all great programmers, once he was bitten by the bug he immersed himself completely in it.
One day Sam happened to be talking programming with his uncle, who was also a programmer but from way, way back.
“Hey,” said Sam, “I’m learning this language called C. You must know a lot of languages, did you ever study C?”
“No,” said the uncle, to Sam’s surprise. “I am one of the very few programmers who never had to learn C.”
“Because I wrote it.”
Oh, Sam’s last name is Ritchie.
What I love about this story is the idea of Dennis waiting Sam’s entire life to deliver this zinger. Just imagine sitting on a line that good, watching your nephew grow up and waiting, waiting until the one day he finally starts learning to code. Did he work on the line in his head at night? Like, “Hmm, how should I word it so I can deliver the punch line perfectly? Should I say ‘I never took a class on C?’ Nah, too awkward…”
The great thing about geniuses is how much effort they put into everything.
Courtesy : Wil Shiply.5 -
You notice that you're a programmer when you automatically put a semicolon behind a closing bracket in an email instead of a dot.4
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Scrolling on Medium I came across this article, about a girl dating a programmer.. 😂😂 😂
https://hackernoon.com/dating-a-pro...22 -
One of my friend's was watching me code. When I got an error, this is what he said.
"You got a big error, so you must be a bad programmer"6 -
I just saw this picture on the product page of a Thunderbolt dock. I'm not sure what this guy is doing, but no programmer of the world would mirror his laptop screen on two full size screens. Just no!11
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1. Decide to learn optimisation algorithms
2. Realise that you have forgotten calculus
3. Decide to learn from the beginning
4. Search for tutorials
5. Go through the introduction parts
6. You know that you can't complete
7. You watch other entertainment things on YouTube.
Stories of a lazy programmer...11 -
Interviewer: Explain Deadlock and I'll hire you.
Le programmer: Hire me and I'll explain it to you.3 -
So... I was watching this ad of this University offering a software course... Can you notice something weird about the code? Hahaha
The subtitles say: "I'm a Programmer"5 -
So apparently I am not a programmer because I turn tea into software. :(
Anyone else feeling discriminated by this definition? :D11 -
Why is it so important to some people to claim that "HTML and CSS are not programming languages"? I get it, you're a REAL programmer working with arrays, maybe tuples, objects and possibly direct memory management. Who the fuck has a right to call themselves a programmer for writing some brain dead markup or poorly designed selectors, right? Who fucking cares for semantic tags or nested selectors?
Just think for a few seconds about when you were taking your first baby steps to becoming the GOD ROCKING MEMORY HANDLER THAT WRITES _REAL_ CODE that you are today, and how good it felt to be able to create something that appeared on your screen. It felt pretty awesome, yeah?
Now imagine if someone much more experienced than you told you "You're not a real programmer, that is not real programming. You should see what I do, I do real programming".
I think you get it. Why spend your energy spreading bad vibes when you could spend it on something more productive. Like reading up on the new CSS4 specs ;)18 -
Well, i have a few stories i would like to share with you :)
My neighbour asked me to fix her webcam.
I told her: But I am a programmer, not a repair service .
Next time my neighbour forgot her Skype password. Se asked me to hack it for her.
I told her: But I am a programmer, not a hacker.
My sister asked me to help her out in her program, because of some bug. Well, she is in the other part of the Country. But, i said, lets give it a try.
Well, it turned out to be some kind of mechanical remote scanner, with needed that exact same remote locally.
I told her: But I am a programmer, not a fictional remote signal scanner repairer.
My grandpa asked me, to copy his old gmail emails into his new laptop.
Well, i told him to log in. He logged in. Than i told him: It is done :D
Thanks for reading it :)4 -
You know you're a programmer when you type git instead of gut (good in German) and autocorrect thinks it's ok...9
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A Java, Python, and C++ programmer are shown a glass that is half-full.
Java programmer - This glass is half-full.
Python programmer - This glass is half-empty.
C++ programmer - This glass is twice as large as necessary.11 -
Some are taking it as a holiday, others still have to meet deadlines while being quarantined.
Source: I am Programmer,I have no life.5 -
By looking at our source code, I see what makes a bad programmer. I see "invalid data" in error logs, guess which of the following 3 conditions caused this:
function somefunc() {
if(condition_1) {
throw "invalid data"
}
if(condition_2) {
throw "invalid data"
}
if(condition_3) {
throw "invalid data"
}
return some_response;
}3 -
!rant
Is it just me or does being a programmer sometimes feel like being a magician. It's such a weird profession. You're living in a bubble, nothing you create is physically tangible, yet anything is possible, and there is always more learn.
Most of the time it's art. Commenting out dead or obsolete code instead of removing it just because it feels like you put a little bit of yourself into it, even though it has no use anymore.
I sometimes wonder if there is any other profession out there that makes you ride the same rollercoaster of satisfaction, frustration, glory and defeat we've all been on.3 -
rant.
when you're a programmer surrounded by designer friends, it feels frustrating sometimes.
people appreciate what they do more because they can clearly see the end product: beautifully designed ui, animated splash screens, clean colorful themes. even though it probably does squat other than to print statements.
then they look at your overly simple design and cant see the beautiful underlying code within.
end rant.3 -
It's easy to multitask these two things.
"Being" a programmer and "being" single.
Trust me, there are no easier ones than these.1 -
An ex of mine broke up with me when I changed my career path to programming. She said she wouldn't want to date with a programmer, I said 'ok bye'.
Guess who has a better career and dated with smarter, nicer, more funny and more attractive people since then 😎7 -
You know that you are a Programmer when you do code mentally and when testing it it works at first try4
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Programmer on his wedding day
Share this with a friend who'll be fixing issues and answering client calls on their wedding 😂🤣9 -
A programmer was smoking.
A lady standing near by asked him can't you see the warning? smoking is injurious for health!!
He replied, "We are bothered only about errors NOT warnings"....2 -
When I am telling non-tech people that I am studying Software Engineering:
They: What do you study at university?
Me: Software Engineering
They: Oh, so you're an engineer! My *some random person* is also an engineer!
Me: No, not that kind of engineer. I am a SOFTWARE engineer. I don't build things.
They: huh?
Me: I write code. Programs. For computers. I a programmer.
They: oh, great, very perspective! Will you fix my *PC/printer/whatever has on/off button on it*?
😶😶😶4 -
Our story start like this.
Boss: Hey programmer A, Can you implement {feature X} on this application?
Programmer A: I suggest not implement {feature X} because {negative impact of feature X}
Boss: Ok
Boss asks Programmer B.
Boss: Hey programmer B, Can you implement {feature X} on this application?
Programmer B: Of course, no problem
Programmer B asks Programmer A.
Programmer B: Hey Programmer A, Do you know how to implement {feature X} on this application? I have no idea.
Programmer A: WHAT!!! do you know that {feature X}, Will negatively impact our application?
Programmer B: Well that's our boss want, I can't say no.
Programmer A: (F**k I hate this guy)4 -
So, I told my programmer friend to bring food for us while you are out.
He has still not came, Should I be worried ?2 -
Programmer 1: We have a problem
Programmer 2: Let’s use RegEx!
Programmer 1: Now we have two problems -
junior programmer look at programming memes:
these are all just memes right right ?!
senior programmer : -
Someone posted a rant referencing a story out of The Pragmatic Programmer about "duck debugging". I've leveled up with a duck.3
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Being a Programmer:
My mom said:
"Honey, please go to the market and buy 1 bottle of milk. If they have eggs, bring 6"
I came back with 6 bottles of milk.
She said: "Why the hell did you buy 6 bottles of milk?"
BECAUSE THEY HAD EGGS!!!!3 -
When Team Lead of Design (HTML) department wins PROGRAMMER OF THE YEAR award annual award of your organization :|
And Sr Tester wins GEEK OF THE YEAR :|
No personal vendetta but what the fuck :/5 -
Real programmer facepalm-
When you argue with a shopkeeper for giving you an expired product because it was dated six months back according to you! Then in between the argument, you realize it follows different date format i.e. dd/MM/yy.
The moment was a real facepalm. 😶1 -
I wonder, Can a programmer survive without StackOverflow !! What if Google goes off for some days!! Life without these legends. Huh..🤔13
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Being an apprentice programmer in a Ludum Dare (Create a game in 72h) that knows more than the official programmer, and have an artist in the group who makes THIS PIECES OF ART!
She didn't even had a computer to work with it, neither she asked for one to the event, so eventually she used mine... And I could not do my work.
Did I mentioned that she used PAINT to color the images?
This is a long, looong story, I'll do the complete version soon...
God.12 -
Interviewer: "Is studying computer science the best way to prepare to be a programmer?"
Bill Gates: "No, the best way to prepare is to write programs, and to study great programs that other people have written. In my case, I went to the garbage cans at the Computer Science Center and I fished out listings of their operating system." -
Fuck this shit.. I don't fucking know shit about using Facebook or Google+... I'm a fucking programmer, just because I work with computers I don't have to know how you're supposed to go about making your fucking Facebook page...damn this gets on my nerves.1
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When I say "I'm a programmer", Please, don't ask me to install windows for you. It it isn't my full time job.10
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I think,
Every programmer when Starts learning programming:-
'I am the one who is gonna lead the world'
But ends up saying:-
'What the fuck I was supposed to do?'🙃4 -
Knowing how to write doesn't make you a writer. Knowing how to program doesn't make you a programmer.9
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Friend: what do you do?
Me: I'm a programmer
Friend: could you fix my computer ?
Me: Kill Me(Thinks). -
Friend: Is this Nvidia GTX 440 a good graphics card?
Me: idk
Friend: if i get it how do i put it in my computer
Me: idk
Friend: but you are a programmer
Me: exactly, i am not an engineer9 -
well, for now, my biggest dev ambition is to become a compiler designer/programmer... or OS designer/programmer.
In short, systems programmer (compilers or OS).
😅😅😁😁3 -
So basically, we're all just constantly writing legacy code of the future. RIP programmer kids of today.4
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My roommate is a damn wannabe programmer: he keeps talking about how much he’s passionate into technology, buying hardware, spending hours into arranging his workstation to be as “cool looking” as possible, talking about future big projects, he even wants the fucking Java and Arduino logos embroidered in his backpack the only issues are that I’ve never seen him spending time in a project which going beyond literal hello world and if I offer him help to help and improve (I’m an employed programmer) he refuses because he’s tired/lacks time (but always make it for Netflix). I’d be still ok with that because I believe in living and letting live but now every time he starts to bore me with his lengthy stories about projects he’ll never do I imagine him with a big clown nose 🤡8
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As a programmer doing sports, the only thing I think is: Shit, when my MacBook falls down, I will lose 13 unpushed commits.10
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What is the condition to join two tables ?
Programmer: primary keys match.
Non-Programmer: The tables height must match.😐1 -
Being a programmer and had to read scientific papers is the worst. the way they name variables in the pseudocodes making me puke.3
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!rant
As a programmer I feel that i write instructions for the machine's heartbeat.
Single repetitive pattern to be performed for gazillion number of times.
And all that matters is how that heartbeat goes. As long as this one is fine, the next one should be mostly fine. -
Travelled for some hours today.
While i was on it i remembered a PDF "The Pragmatic Programmer" resting in my phone.
Opened it and read it until the bus reached the destination.
I entered the bus a complete idiot and upon exit i was half Socrates of programming habits.
Had read some chapters though.
Why didn't i know about it before ? -
Day 3 : without seeing a monitor and programming.
I caught an eye infection and stopped my world and I could literally do nothing but sit tight. I have unfinished tasks but health is imprortant.2 -
Wondering how many of you have ADD/ADHD, diagnosed or not. I've heard people say that many programmers have ADD or ADHD and that it generally makes them a better programmer. I myself have ADD and I feel like it makes me a better programmer, but I have to work harder at paying attention to my wife/social life.24
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Mind of a programmer in an Interview be like:-
Interviewer:- What's your name?
Programmer:- My name is Alice. (In mind printf("my name is %s ",name);)
Interviewer:- Where are you from?
Programmer:- India. (In mind location = &India;)11 -
Programmer OAth. Just read on a github repo
0. I will only undertake honest and moral work. I will stand firm against any requirement that exploits or harms people.
1. I will respect the learnings of those programmers who came before me, and share my learnings with those to come.
2. I will remember that programming is art as well as science, and that warmth, empathy and understanding may outweigh a clever algorithm or technical argument.
3. I will not be ashamed to say "I don't know", and I will ask for help when I am stuck.
4. I will respect the privacy of my users, for their information is not disclosed to me that the world may know.
5. I will tread most carefully in matters of life or death. I will be humble and recognize that I will make mistakes.
6. I will remember that I do not write code for computers, but for people.
7. I will consider the possible consequences of my code and actions. I will respect the difficulties of both social and technical problems.
8. I will be diligent and take pride in my work.
9. I will recognize that I can and will be wrong. I will keep an open mind, and listen to others carefully and with respect.4 -
The problem with being a designer and a programmer is that Photoshop and Illustrator is on Windows and I code on Ubuntu.
You have to restart and boot a different OS everytime goddamnit12 -
A programmer is a person who fixed a problem that you don't know you have in a way you don't understand.
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Anyone want a free Python, PHP, or Assembly book?
Well how about all 3???
https://fanatical.com/en/bundle/...7 -
do not use the word coder please.
if you write code, you're a programmer. if you call yourself a coder, you're either a sixth grader who just learned about the terminal, or an idiot.14 -
"You're a programmer, dammit!" Damian Conway
I'm at a seminar given by Conway right now, so much stuff I wish I had heard before about how to be more productive and how to stay "in the zone" while programming without distractions. If any of you ever gets a chance of following one of his seminars (he also wrote books), it's highly recommended.4 -
How to spot the difference between a tech enthusiast and an actual Programmer/Engineer in 2019?
Tech Enthusiast: I'm really excited about the New X, it's going to be the fastest machine in the market. It's got gimmick feature A, gimmick feature B, actual feature A ......
Programmer/Engineer: So I bought this 8-year-old Thinkpad from eBay yesterday, wifi isn't working but I could just buy an off-market wifi card and fix it. Might also replace the old HDD with a new SSD. Would probably start using it as my daily driver once it's fixed.4 -
A non programmer friend sends me this with exitment "Its you! Its you!"
https://youtu.be/9RpwbIN0r2U
friends--1 -
Hi i am new programmer i have start by c programming please help me any suggestions about programming11
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working as a freelancer,. one thing my family should learn is that,. no one should ever disturb a programmer on full concentration.3
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I'm a hobby programmer and i don't hav any programming ideas! How do you all get programming ideas?7
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One @burgirghoval asked on a different rant how can one be the best programmer in the world.
My answer is simple. It's by creating a community like @devrant.
Thank you guys for this amazing platform. -
If there is anything worse than a bad, not willing to learn programmer is a so called plugin programmer.
Who only knows how to install plugin over plugin to do a simple task.
Just had to fix something on one websites (wp site, I know, just kill me) where the guy had like 25-30 plugins (some where disabled). And most of them were for adding new widget positions.3 -
While we mourn this dark future of the internet, let it not hamper International Developer Day!
Happy Day of the Programmer Devrant!
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/...3 -
Leaving my first job 🦷after graduation as a programmer for 6 yrs.. to join an international team of developers in a new company...exciting and wierd but must 🦴👔7
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What would happen if a programmer and a PM had to cut down a tree...
https://twitter.com/i/moments/...
Wouldn't be so funny if it weren't so true... -
Bruh....ig this is a bit too much but relatable to real life...
God is the best programmer....
lol5 -
How do you identify a programmer with just one question? Ask him to pick a number from 1 to 100.
(Disclaimer: 1% of margin of error).5 -
I'm an old school programmer, I remember coding in BASIC, ASP, and such languages, I made a streaming site in PHP, that I could use when going to parties and their music sucked, I phoned BBS computers, I document took forever to download.. Still I'm searching for a job in IT, I wonder how that will go :S
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"A programmer was arrested for writing unreadable code. He refused to comment."
H/T: (@Mr_Drinksonme)1 -
Thinking about freelancing, any freelancers here who can help me get started?
I have a bit of experience freelancing being a designer but not yet as a programmer. Im currently a student but have made a few programs.
What do you guys think?5 -
Listening to rain sound or pleasing sounds while coding helps me think straight and sets a good mood for me to complete a task.Music sets me straight.
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Being a programmer it is not easy.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Because you always have null pointer expression!!4 -
"Programming is a craft. At its simplest, it comes down to getting a
computer to do what you want it to do (or what your user wants it to do). As a programmer, you are part listener, part advisor, part interpreter, and part dictator. You try to capture elusive requirements and find a way of expressing them so that a mere machine can do them justice. You try to document your work so that others can understand it, and you try to
engineer your work so that others can build on it. What's more, you try to do all this against the relentless ticking of the project clock. You work small miracles every day.
It's a difficult job. "
- The pragmatic programmer -
When you impress your peers because you have grown in a year as a programmer. Still there is a long way to go but I feel very confident I can achieve my goals. Any tips for project management and how to grow soft skills. I lack in that area.3
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When you realize you were born when it was 4:04 AM on the clock...
I think I was born to be a programmer... Or maybe not? Am I an error?6 -
//Met an old friend
So I heard you're a programmer now. I need some help from you.
*write something on paper
HACK this fb account unless you are a big fat phony.6 -
Whether you're a newbie or a programmer with 10+ years of experience, you'll always go to StackOverflow and GitHub 🤣😂joke/meme programming github programming meme life of a programmer stackoverflow programming jokes programmer life6
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It's a difference between a real programmer and a programmer. One knows how to code and one knows how to google.1
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I think I am really passionate bout programming and want to build something innovative but I need a fellow programmer to do it with. I am ready to put any kinda work in!1
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How ofte are you guys absolutely sure that you've picked the right solution for a specific problem? As a novice programmer it bugs me to death that I sometimes don't know if I'm using a "best practice" solution4
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For programmer, one day without programming feels like there is no meaning of life without programming.
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How good is "The Pragmatic Programmer - by Andy Hunt and Dave Thomas"?
Any positives, to motivate me.2 -
'You are a programmer? Could you help us out with our novel AI in our company?'
is the new
'Can you fix my printer?' -
I thought putting up a !ctags -R in .vimrc would help me use ctags in all of my code and I wouldn't have to do it manually but sadly that was a bad decision like.But I didn't know tags that generate to a 220 GB4
-
Seriously why does Android studio lag so badly.I mean it's beefed up version of a text editor( I love studio for it's innumerous IDE features).It eats away my RAM and you might have guessed it right,I do have 4 GB RAM. The application takes memory that is sometimes more than that of games.2
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I think the hardest part about being a programmer is to decide what to program in your free time (if you have any)
Am I right?
If not, what is the hardest part in your opinion?1 -
Yesterday a longtime friend asked me if I finally become a programmer.
Is it really being a programmer looking for solutions on stackoverflow?1 -
Company: congratulations, you're the month's best programmer
Programmer: uhm ok
His browser history:3 -
!rant
Guys, could you please give me some gift ideas for a programmer? I was thinking about an IntelliJ Idea subscription, but it's too expensive for a present.17 -
Found a very good description of programmers. We do not know each other yet we help each other. There is always someone who is there to help you. Proud to be a programmer.2
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#bonfiretalk
Why did you want to become a programmer? Spending alot of my Teenage years on online games I always had a fascination for those 1337 haxxors that just appeared, did some awesome neverseen stuff and sometimes suddenly disappeared, never came back and became urban legends ("I heard h4xor1337 got caught by the FBI"..."I heard he was a CIA Hacker".."He was from Russia").. I started universe, picked some C/C++ Tutorials and 3 years later I am a freelancing Android developer . Today I am Downloading the source code of that old mmorpg (which is still played by alot of people , especially in the private Server scene) to practice my C++ -
Suddenly Programmer becoms Doctor so he said to patient :- Your x-Ray showed a broken rib,but we fixed it with photoshop3
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So I heard to get a job as a programmer you need a degree in computer science. I looked it up and apparently computer science includes alot of math courses. I'm not good at math and as far as I can see complex math is not needed to be a programmer. Is there any other degree I can take to get a job as a programmer that doesn't require as much math as a computer science degree does?14
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Not sure if this was already shared but..
Q: why did the programmer quit his job?
A: because he didn't get arrays (a raise) -
Programmer at an interview:
interviewer: introduce yourself
programmer: Hi, my name is ______, and am a programmer,
you can actually call me a programmer because from the top I look good, but from the bottom I am naked.
comment below whether you will be hiring this programmer on not.7 -
Hello Guys... Just wanted to have some opinions:
Considering long-term career stability, how does a Machine Learning engineer compare with a Software Developer ( C, C++, Java, Python, etc. ) & a Web Developer ( Java, JavaScript, SQL, CSS, Python ) ?9 -
How does Programmer enjoy their Life?
Girl: Do you drink?
Programmer: No.
Girl: Have Girlfriend?
Programmer: No.
Girl: Then how do you enjoy life?
Programmer: I am a Programmer8 -
Any tips for wannabe programmer? I've learned java basics and feel quite comfortable with them. Unable to write any projects though. I think reading and trying to understand some different medium sized projects source code could help. Do you know where I could find such a thing?6
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What was the most silliest mistake you have ever made just before you were unable to focus for some reason as a developer / programmer ?
Mine was to put || instead of && and wondering why some html is not rendering on my html page.4 -
Guys I have to write a CV for school as homework(yep), could you make me one or tell me cool stuff to add to make me look like a super duper crazy programmer?5
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!rant
Reading The Pragmatic Programmer and Clean Code.
Any other suggestions on books thats not specified to a specific programming language that is worth reading?2 -
Programmer!!!joke/meme computerscience css java python programming javascript programmer softwaredeveloper coding developer html2
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Why the hell do people still use Java? It's so slow, messy, insecure, and heck, it doesn't even have unsigned integers, bytes etc.? Like wtf?34
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As a programmer I solve my life problems using programming too..
<?php
$problemSolved = “Fuck Life!!!”;
echo $problemSolved;
?>4 -
!rant
I used to use quora for most of my programming related trivia and tips but of late I'm glued to devRant.3 -
Hosted my very first project, developed back in Aug18.
It has been a wonderful journey as a programmer.
Link to my first web development project(I should say web designing cuz it doesn't have any db XD):
https://nitinsautomobilewebsite.herokuapp.com/...
More projects developed by me:
www.github.com/globefire -
Its just frustrating being a person who learns tech or any other stream from the internet.As much as i love the huge amout of information we have access to, it becomes difficult to sort through the tons of information and learn something.When i was a kid , there was a text book which had concepts which i had to understand to increase my knowledge but now without a proper sylabbus and no single source material i'm consuming everything and i end up re-reading same concept again , except this time its from another book.How do u devs get a proper sylabbus and focus yourself when you are reading about a particular subject?3
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The difference between a programmer and a non-programmer is.........
The non-programmer thinks a kilobyte is 1000 bytes,
while a programmer is convinced that a kilometer is 1024 meters.....6 -
It is so frustrating that browsers had to keep the open developer tools as Ctrl+shift + C.I work with a ton of terminals and lot of browser tabs and when I try to copy text , I automatically type Ctrl + shift + C and boom , the developer tools opens up.I know we could change the key bindings but who the hell kept the "open developer tools " shortcut as Ctrl + Shift + C.That is a serious flaw!!! Fucking hate it..
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As a group of computer-ily inclined people, what are your opinions one the words developer, programmer, and computer scientist? Do you see them as distinctly different things? Or interchangable? If so, how come?9
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I'm not doing this for money but what's the average salary of a front-end web developper or a programmer ?
(How much do you earn ?)1 -
Hello , I am Student 1st year , studing Programming.
My dream is to be the most famous programmer in the world.I am hard worker.
I am learning C#.
The problem is that I cant find to much space to work with other here in my city , and learning my self it doesnt make sense to me.
What would you suggest to me ?4 -
Programmer on a date 🤣🤣joke/meme memes programmer date programming languages coding meme programming techindustan programming comic funny2
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While browsing I just found the following website titled The Mediocre Programmer, and thought it might be an interesting read for some people on dR that are grappling with self-doubt, impostor syndrome, or similar issues:
http://themediocreprogrammer.com/wh... -
The hard programmer life : you write a super random email to do a urgent test and it is fucking taken.