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Windows: everything is proprietary and inconsistent
Mac: everything is expensive
Linux: everything is a text file12 -
GF: Why are working so late?
Me: Because no matter what I do, everything is working correctly.
GF: What....
The only career when you have to work late because everything is working like it should (cannot reproduce an issue).19 -
I just found out that in our old GUI everything is derived from button :/
Table is a button
Background is a button
Icon is a button
:/13 -
A customer called me in a stressed out state and asked me if I could get it up.
I kept my composure but politely told her to give me a little bit more to work with..
5 -
Designer: The design is done and approved by you. Set the launch date. We just need to put some code behind it and the shop project is finished.
After the meeting the programmers heard what the designer said to the customer in the meeting.
Programmer: *facepalm*
PM: *facepalm*6 -
Being a programmer is easy!
It's like riding a bike
Except
The bike is on fire
you're on fire
everything is on fire
and you're in hell4 -
CSS is easy. It’s like riding a bike, which is on fire and the ground is on fire and everything is on fire because it is hell.7
-
DevOps is like development, except there is zero test coverage, everything is a race condition, and there are a million variables declared as global. 😡8
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Best part of being a dev?
The feeling when everything is going so well that you start suspecting that something is wrong.1 -
Probably isn't a righteous rant... But there's a new guy who shakes his leg... All day... Makes my screen wobble... All day... Trying to think about about my code... But thoughts being shaken to the floor... All. Goddamn. Day.
*sigh*20 -
:: *joins devRant to rant about everything*
:: *everything I want to complain about is on the front page*
:: *sighs in relief*1 -
COMPANIES DON'T NEED FUCKING BLOCKCHAIN YOU CAN JUST MANAGE IT YOURSELF. THE WHOLE FUCKING POINT OF BLOCKCHAIN IS SO NO ONE HAS CONTROL AND IF YOU MAKE A BLOCK CHAIN THAT YOU CONTROL THEN WHAT IS THE FUCKING POINT.3
-
What is Automation?
Option 1 : Make life easier
Option 2 : Make others jobless
Option 3 : Make yourself jobless
Everything is nothing.4 -
Not a rant, just my thoughts :)
At November and October of last year I was very frustrated with everything - everything was annoying me and I was bored even with coding. I needed a break and do something different - go somewhere.
So we decided with friends that we will go to Georgia to spent there New Year Eve. Right now I'm coming back from airport by bus to my city aftertrip but can't sleep because I'm energized as fuck! Whole week without internet (sometimes we got open wifi to check buses or maps), without local sim card, without roaming, just our group and good attitude. We visited almost whole north of Georgia riding in taxis, marshrutka, even autostop, and it was fucking awesome.
So, when you are exhausted, take a break and regenerate your baterries, work is not everything! Just wanted to share this with you :) Can't wait to go to work in monday to write some code :) Life is beautiful!
On photo - my friend takes photo of Kazbek Mountain :)
4 -
oh it’s a little bit old ...
now everything is firefox quantum! the best browser ever
download firefox quantum is your purpose :)))
6 -
Ah finally, the moment when being a web developer is full of joy.
☑️ Server-side rendering
☑️ Inline critical css
☑️ Add progressive image loading
☑️ Minify everything
☑️ Automate release process in CI
☑️ Lint everything
Now that the strucutre is up, time to code the actual website. This is gonna be good!8 -
CSS is easy. Its like riding a bike, which is on Fire and the ground is on fire and everything is on fire because It is hell.7
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Everything is a fucking priority.
According to the management, everything should be done yesterday already.
Gave me a single designer and developer while asking asking me to deliver long term and short term initiatives at the same time.
Morons.8 -
Started my internship in web development so far everything is good but the only problem is website is on developed on WIX. No coding necessary 😣😣2
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Ever since i became programming-literate i cant just enjoy a game without thinking how everything how everything is working 🤦🏻12
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Friday Eve: Closing eclipse project happily at work. Everything works sorta fine.
Monday morning: Opening eclipse project again. Everything is like i left it. "Main class could not be found."
What the fuck eclipse?
4 -
Year 0:
Coworker:
ARGH! I fuckin hate JavaScript!
Me:
Keep going! Everyone started as a novice. You'll manage.
Year 2:
Coworker:
Hmm. JavaScript is actually pretty nice!
Me:
See, you are a successful junior now!
Year 4:
Coworker:
ARGH! I fuckin hate JavaScript!
Me:
Well, so you eventually reached senior level. Nice!1 -
Forget about coffee, nothing wake you up faster than a colleague mentioning your name in the slack channel where the stderr of the app writes.1
-
Update to my CGI library for C++:
i've finally written the docs, everything seems to run stable!
if anybody is crazy enough to try it out and leave some feedback, I take everything!
:D
https://github.com/Wittmaxi/webcpp
6 -
Proud Windows fanboy - If something is "Not responding", try "Task manager". Then everything is cool
But you see, it's actually "Task manager" that is "Not responding"3 -
Apple annual conference.
Do everything that Android, Windows and linux already do almost a decade later and everything is cool again???
I seriously feel bad for the consumers. I can't believe that they get away with this every year.10 -
Everything is going surprisingly well. Pray for me guys. This doesn't look good. This is going too well :(
-
VS Code is cool and everything, but man, PyCharm is some next-level shit. And the best part: free for students.14
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When project is finished, everything is according specs, and on final review the client says: "everything looks nice! But I would like to change just a few small details. I would like a different design and functionality".
Seriously?!
1 -
Sometimes the challenge of the day is to stay professional.
Having a professional attitude. even when everything is going to hell.2 -
I'm having a DAY.
it's like I'm trying to "2+2=4" and hitting "unknown operator =", figure that out, get "22" back, fix that, then math service is down, redeploy math service, wait 30 minutes, that's up, get "out of numbers" exception, turns out a dependency updated and now I have to register what "2" means, fix that, FINALLY get 2+2 to evaluate, I get 5. Figure that out, get 4! 4!!! FINALLY. Push it. Get 55 on the server. Gets 4 on my machine, getting some random 55 from the server.5 -
Android docs suck so hard 😇
Google sucks so hard at making APIs 😄
Wraps everything in libraries, whose only purpose is to hide their incompetence 😛
13 -
Microsoft's business suite is much better than Google's business suite.
If not for Google's monopoly in consumer market, MS would have easily taken over the consumer space as well. No wonder this company is acing their game in B2B space.
I can see myself migrating to MS ecosystem because fuck YouTube and Google Maps. MS has everything better now.
You know what MS did right?
They heard herd.
And this is what annoys me about Google. A company arrogant and adamant in their own approach that they even refuse to acknowledge a user's existence.6 -
Be us
Be pair devs
Be doing PHP
Be explaining code to each other to find bug.
Be confused. Code checks out.
Be laughing asses off
Be realise the filename had a m instead of n
@TheCapeGreek -
I think my LED strip is displaying 16 million colors faster than i can process. Im drunk, so everything is possible.
Jiggletits2 -
Cannot run one service which is depended on by another before that service is instanced because everything within the cotainer is asynchronous 👍1
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Today is a stark reminder of why i want to leave here. First we couldn't do anything because production was down which blocks dev login. Then support tells me I need to work harder because my bug count keeps going up. But what is in my bugs? Feature requests, global changes, and work that isn't mine. Gee thanks :( Why does support get to comment on my performance anyway by something as dumb as a bug count? Grrr.5
-
my boss is using internet explorer for everything
i cant even imagine how he can put up with its slowness and awful interface and everything else4 -
while true; do
echo "Drop everything this $LATEST_TICKET is your highest priority now!"
sleep(3600)
done1 -
Working on a C project right now, this is the only thing that comes to mind...
Good old printbugger.
1 -
COO Snake ousts CEO, fires founders, is generally clueless about tech and product and design and science (and basically everything this business is about) and expected me to drop everything else I do (rich, varied and fulfilling) and work full time as a slave-nerd. Some people just don’t get it.
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that feeling when everything isnt responding anymore so i thought task manager could handle it..... turns out task manager is like everything else....
Task Manager (not responding) -
Am I wrong in thinking not everything apple develops is THAT good or better than the competition?11
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OMFG I'm exhausted from the workload this last week, but everything is due this week and I'm totally ruined because everything is half done. Just murder me in my sleep please.3
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School group project: Pipeline is done, everything deploys automatically, microservices work in development, https everywhere, Docker is bae, everything works perfectly
Now I have to work on frontend stuff ;_;8 -
One small change to push before playback... what could go wrong? Everything... everything is going wrong.
-
Our team - if ever existed - is falling apart. Pressure raising. Release deadline probably failing. No release ready for Big Sur.
Almost seemed we were getting somewhere: More focus on code quality, unit tests, proper design, smaller classes. But somehow we now ended up in "microservice" hell; a gazillion classes, mostly tested in isolation, but together they just fail to do their job. A cheap and dirty proof of concept from March is still more capable than this pile. I really start to doubt all that "Clean code", TDD, Agility rhetorics. What does it help you, if nobody cares for the end result? It's like a month I try to hammer down that message: we have to have testable artifacts, we have to ensure code signing works, our artifact is packaged and installable, we have to give QA something they can test - but time just passes and this piece of shit software is still being killed or does nothing.
Now my knee is broken and can do no sports and are tied to my chair even more. To top it all my coffee machine broke and my internet connection was abysmal this week. Not the usual small disconnects, after which it would recover, but more annoying and enduring: often being throttled to 1.7 MB/s (ranking my connection in the slowest 7% even in Germany). My RDP sessions had compression artifacts all over the screen and a mouse click would only take effect 5 sec later.
But my Esspresso machine was just repaired. Not all hope is lost.7 -
Me: Yay everything is tested and everything works!
Manager: Changes password of the e-mail server
Me: :(5 -
I honestly owe everything to my buddy in our startup. He has taught me how to think in Javascript and that is why I am where I am. We fight almost everyday on almost everything, but there is Noone I respect more than I respect him..
-
I turn into a 2 yrs old whenever I'm editing a 3D model.
From the perspective that I want to throw everything in sight and my response to everything is "No!". 🙄4 -
I will take any dev who can defend their point of view under scrutiny but admit to being wrong over one that just agrees with everything i say. I will also take a dev that asks questions over one who agrees with everything i say. In fact the only thing worse than a dev who agrees with everything i say, is one that disagrees with everything i say, and one that doesnt show initiative.1
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Comitting a code is like comitting a crime,
There is a chance it will make something better, but it usually fucks everything up.1 -
What is your home network infrastructure like?
Ethernet or is everything WiFi? Is there a dedicated firewall? Servers running on a raspberry? Do you have VLANs configured?23 -
Somebody in Microsoft is playing with Github.com styling. Everything is broken from the last few hours.1
-
When everything is working, I like to make my Git commit message "Everything is coming up Millhouse"
-
Advice to any child thinking to start coding:
Stay away from everything that is linked with JavaScript13 -
I'm so fucking done with all the hate the modern web is getting. If you don't need it, don't use it. Shut the fuck up if somebody else uses it, because he needs it.
And that whole war between libraries is so fucking ridiculous. Why do I have to feel bad for using a tool that does exactly what I want, and provides me a great dev experience.
No I am not going to use a stack of 4 technologies because "native is faster". Fuck you. I don't care, and you shouldn't either.
I shouldn't even have the need to rant about this, but I'm just in this constant rut, because I feel like no matter what I'm doing, I'm doing it wrong. I hate it.4 -
Everything I’ve studied for the past 2 years, everything I will study in the next 2 and basically the entirety of my career after this is all built on increasingly complex and abstracted ways of counting shit3
-
Theory is when you know everything, but nothing works.
Practice is when everything works but no one knows why.
In my project group, theory and practice are combined: nothing works and no one knows why.1 -
People who write open letters on medium or anywhere on the internet. Bitch this is the internet everything is an open letter3
-
Nothing better than walking out of the examination classroom, opening up your phone and being flooded with emails and messages about production servers being down
It's that time of the week again
Luckily, now that everything is in place everything is 100% automated with ci/cd 😎2 -
There are two stages in programming.
The first is when everything goes smooth as heck, and you're a god.
The second is when everything goes to shit, and you don't understand anything.2 -
Time to switch to offline and hide in some dark corner to get work done. Tired of all the IM’s and coming over to my desk from 1 person for “critical” work. If they’re all critical then none of them are truly critical. If you sit on the data for 2 months, and then today is the day it becomes critical and the compliance issue is because of your ineptitude then its a you problem not an IT problem. Then on top of that you submit your data to be loaded in the incorrect request form and spreadsheet format you can go fuck yourself asking this be done in an hour. It could be done in 15 minutes if you had it in the correct format as specified in the 20 meetings over the past year which removed all manual analysis and automated the entire process you idiot. Now I have to get it into the correct format in that hour so I don’t have to do the analysis for you.
I have other things to do besides your etl tickets, like finding the actual problems in our actual critical applications. You know the ones where the VP’s of this giant corporation start calling if they go down.
Sorry for the rambling guys. -
*hits CTRL-S to ensure everything is saved *
.5 seconds later:
*Hits CTRL-ALT-S to ensure sanity is saved*
Git Push2 -
Run test
everything ok
Run again
everything ok
Run again
error
Run again
everything ok
*wtaf is happening?*
I googled for the cause of a "double callback" error and found out that supertest was throwing it when I was attaching a file to the API request. found no conclusive way to solve it, just that "supertest does it from time to time".
Trying to investigate further, I made a function to repeat the API request 5 times in a row. Everything passed. The run it again. Two failed. Again and everything passed.
this is bullshit
fml
-
hey Mark, everything is fine,
Come oooooout man, everything is back online
💩💩💩
(Unfortunately, Mark is went insane after the failure 😭😭😭)
4 -
"I don't think we should be playing with our privates {variables} like that" - framework designer
= context =
It was noticed that we have too many setter functions to change private variables just to do unit tests. So we had a small meeting to discuss what to do about this.
Options:
- don't do the test
- ignore till another time (ie: keep the functions till its a problem)
- put the variables into a provider
- use reflection (the above quote was a reaction to this option)6 -
CoWorker: so when are you going to be out?
Me: taking 1 week off Oct 1. I need a break from production issues and all these critical tasks...
CW: ah OK yea, you deserve it. So where you going?
Me: well I'm planning to just stay home unless the weather is really nice. I'm going to try React Native to build a mobile app and maybe look for some open source projects... O yes gotta look into my investments too...
CW: Oohhhh... Ok.... (We go on talking about Trump and why somehow the markets haven't crashed yet...)2 -
How to know your network proxy sucks: when everything IDE-related (downloading new package, using Gradle…) is blocked, but almost everything prohibited (like streaming) isn't.
Love university.15 -
I fucking hate whenever vscode or nvidia force you to update, by just breaking everything they can, e.g. vscode stops syntax highlighting or intellisense and nvidia randomly breaks DX11, after you update though - everything is just fine again2
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The meetings for SEO.
The SEO guy is really, really nice. He's patient, comprehensive, he's quite good looking and everything, but my boss is a total moron when speaking about internet stuff. He makes us repeat everything at least three times, he will note everything on a sheet of paper that he will lose and write again... these reunion last 2 hours and we have one twice a month. Uuuugh... -
Just found out that if you spam the different types of notifications that you want to see in my rewrite of devRant you cause an instacrash.
Multithreading is both a blessing and a curse.2 -
Javascript is trash.
PHP is trash.
Java is trash.
Go is trash.
Scala is trash.
Your mum is trash.
Everything is trash.
DevRant summarised in one post.12 -
Am I the only one who heavily comments their code when learning a new language to the point of you essentially describing what everything is and how everything works6
-
Today was a real Monday (I know it's Wednesday, let me explain).
Nothing worked. Not for me and not for my coworker. Across all tasks that we did today. It was very frustrating and a lot of swearing was involved.
Every week has to have a Monday I guess. Let's hope tomorrow gets better.1 -
So I make websites on the side for small time clients for some additional income. And without fail every time I sit down to work on this one site something goes wrong. First there were problems with the hosting, and now the template that the client chose is no longer for sale. I hope I'm not going to lose them over this :( I've sent them a list of alternative templates and contacted the company behind the original template to ask what is up. Real shame because they picked what I considered the favourite too and now I regret waiting to fork over the money to make the purchase.5
-
Hey, would you mind trying this new powerful JS library?
It has really powerful abstraction over powerful features that compose powerful components using powerful patterns based on a powerful new asynchronous paradigm2 -
I read alot of rants where people describe that they had to implement things they know were wrong and later the boss complained about it although its what he said.
My requirements engineering professor always told us to document everything. Every change made to the requirements must have the source and the reason written down. Idealy with some sort of signature from the boss.
But i understand its not always that easy or done. Which is kinda sad. -
Ok. The honeymoon with Windows 10 is clearly over and so the gloves are off.
About to lose my mind with both Windows and Visual Studio updates. If A+B, everything goes smoothly but on the other hand if A+B, everything goes to hell.
And when trying to add components to Visual Studio, it fails 9 times out of ten due to some goddamn /NoWeb switch. What/where the hell is this switch and why everything works without issues that one time out of ten!?
About to burn everything with fire! -
My internet speed is now going at something like 0,3 Mbps... I can't open devRant, Google, Everything is so fking slow...3
-
Yesterday we had the second meeting with the commissioning agency and the client itself.
The project is a sort of CRM that allows to book for medical treatments (not gonna go into boring details)
At the end, we just ask the client if everything was clear enough to start using it (the manual has yet to be done) and she just answers "yeah, I'll just have to try out a few things and then everything will be totally clear, but right now I think I got this"
Literally 2 hours later, she calls us telling to prepare another meeting because she doesn't understand the very basics of the whole project.
So now I'll probably have to redo an awful lot of shit just to make her understand what she actually wants5 -
I just started learning java cause i have to because of uni, and i heavily used JS before , but somehow i really love the statically typed syntax and it brings so much clarity about what everything is doing.
Also love how object oriented everything is5 -
Working on FCM today and actually this is not rant. 😃 🎉
Google documented everything correctly and everything is understandable. -
For you Jira users, as song:
(to the tune of "Everything is Awesome" from The Lego Movie)
"Everything's P-Zerrrooooooo!!!
Everything is due day before yesterdaaayyyy!!" -
I'm on a project that has been off the rails for a few weeks. We're no longer working off tickets/the scrum board. Clients are asking for production servers yesterday.
Things are behind. Some people are working nights and weekends. I'm one of the people who are vary vocal about not working over time and I haven't worked a single night or weekend yet (we're salary exempt too; no extra pay).
I even bought up in a meeting how I was not happy about people being guilt tripped for not working over (our PO messaged me out of band a few weeks back telling me my teammates would appreciate me putting in more effort).
I agreed to work this Sunday and already regret it, even though they said there'd be compensation (without mentioning what that compensation is). I was also told everyone is doing it and that's not true either.
In my 18 years in IT, I've worked at ~ 13 companies. This one is in the bottom 3 for sure.2 -
An entire week near my little bro in the hospital. Everything is fine now. And beside that my Swift app is almost complete...
-
- Every specialist is looking after his area of expertise
- Everyone is a specialist of everything and shall work on everything
- Every specialist is looking after his area of expertise, making improvements and automations in his area
- Everyone is a specialist of everything and is looking after everything, automating everything (devops)
- Everyone is a specialist of everything and is looking after everything, automating everything, in all the environments (SRE)
- ... I wonder what's next...
I miss the good old days when developers could be developers and rely on DBAs, sysadmins and networkists to do their job well. I miss the days when developers were developing applications, sytems, modules,.. Not troubleshooting ELBs, RDS latencies or building monitoring for servers. -
We are all Ouroboros - the snake that eats its own tail , as we are constantly trapped in a worry-go-around state of :
Everything is bad
But everything can get worse
and everything will be terrible
But what if it doesn't
But what if it does1 -
Test the project pre-release -> everything works well
Release the project -> new bugs comes out, features are not working anymore, some files are corrupted, your PC is ready to explode and a black hole is going to destroy everything1 -
Biggest influence was the Java coding style, where constants are ALL_CAPS and everything else is camelCase
-
I got a new Drupal project to maintain. (🤬🤬🤬)
So I'm looking at the content and noticed raw HTML inside the content area. I first thought, the client is using a wysiwyg editor.. But no. It's worse.
He is transforming a XML with XSLT to HTML and copy & paste everything. The result are nested <html><body> tags and everything breaks.
Just because drupal is to hard to work with. I will burn everything and install WordPress 🤯🤬🤬🤬2 -
Me to my team: demo to the client is postponed, we'll show it the day after tomorrow.
Them: nice, then we can put in production also the new feature xyz.
Me: mmm... Is it tested and everything ok? Then yes, let's deploy it.
Bad decision. Now everything is not working. Rollback needed!2 -
Now that I've got most everything in my personal project working, I realize I need to rewrite everything... My code and infrastructure is absolutely horrible 😅3
-
literally everything, with infinite time to spare. (this is another reason why immortality sucks cock, btw)2
-
My colleagues who work with AWS got trainings and I was supposed to pick out training that roughly corresponds to the content of the AWS training just in Azure. I did that. And as an answer I get a link to the Microsoft Virtual Training Days, where I can do the Fundamentals course and then take the AZ900 exam for free. Cool! Why should you spend money. It's all in the Microsoft documentation.1
-
I'm ok with almost every language.
But this "everything is a function" concept of JavaScript always give me that "kill me painless and quick" itch !!!#":":/#*%¢|°°
const fuuuuuuuuuck = require('fuckoff.js')1 -
I flashed resurrection remix! My battery lasts more, it's faster, everything is better. God I love android7
-
TIL the definition of Favela Architecture.
The blue spots are (copied) helper classes and everything is static.
-
My Designer keeps saying he is making everything consistent and reusable throughout the site. But pretty much every time I get a new comp from him, everything is a brand new design just for this page....
I hate designers.... -
I need 750++'s to get my avatar a pair of slippers that I got for free after quitting my job for which the shoes came free.
#include "irony.much"; -
never ranted about movies
but
Everything Everywhere All at Once
this movie is for THIS generation.1 -
Ok so my newest project is launching tonight and I feel very anxious, even though I tested everything beforehand. Is it normal?4
-
Until I started posting on here, I was the only thing that was working on my computer and the only thing that I expected to work on my computer.
-
Started optimising everything. For example last week while cooking, instead of taking another spoon to stir the food, I reused the same knife which I used to cut
-
What's up with the new android update, everything is like big. Did they just changed one line of code like increase everything to big size ...lol4
-
i am frightened. i have a feeling the only person i can talk about programming stuff twice a year is getting out of touch.
as if the rarity of the talks is not bad enough, our tech stack edges away every time. he is the most intelligent person, yet i see no huge advantages and my strides just raise a shrug. not out of lack of interest but from pure inexperience. we have a long history of joint projects, but i fear the day only he relieves about his webdev experiences with his php-es5-css-stack, while i can not contribute with my knowledge about python- and vba-automation, oop and es6+. as if he would not be able to wrap his head about all this in a blink of an eye. -
Is anyone using Linux on HP Pavilion (Touchscreen)?
Just wanted to know that everything is working properly or not?7 -
The day I'm fucking around with Kafka Streams API and had to work with Java after swearing it off 5 years ago for JS bae...
Is the day that Apache's everything is down. Can't even hit their fucking website. I just want a fat jar. Just one. -
Saw github trend is everything you know about x. I am going to create one called everything you know everything you know
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