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"serverless" is a stupid name. There's always a server, just not yours. It's just as dumb as people thinking "cloud" means there's no computer. There's always a computer, just not yours.9
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I saw a guy building a website today.
No React.
No Vue.
No Ember.
He just sat there.
Writing HTML.
Like a Psychopath.32 -
IT: Hi, how can I help?
User: Hi, I can't get onto the wifi / internet, my computer says "No Signal".
IT: Hm, we don't have wifi, your on a cable, what exactly is saying no signal?
User: Its just on the screen here.
IT: No but where, are you inside a browser, or is it a popup down the bottom corner?
User: No I haven't got that far yet, it just says no signal on a black screen, then it flashes and says no signal in another position.
IT: ...... did you turn on your computer after turning on the monitor ... thats the screen saying no signal from the computer.
User: ah yep, thats it, thanks!3 -
Overheard this guy talking to his friends about Python.
Guy: "Have you seen Python?? You basically just talk to the computer. There's no variables. You just go 'a = 2' and you can print 'a' and it'll give you 2! And there's no imports or anything!"15 -
Me, in the zone, staring at the code. Co-worker enters.
Co: hey, can you...
Me (not really listening): no.
Co: it's just...
Me: no.
Co: later?
Me: no.
Co: but...
Me: no.
Co: (leaving)13 -
I love how "minimal" devRant is.
No username, no time... just the number of likes and number of comments ..
*it's a feature not a bug*
✌(◕‿-)✌3 -
How malloc works? It's easy. Just follow this simple flowchart and you will understand in no time.
9 -
anyone else just wake up one day and just isn't in the mood to do any work and feels like they are making no progress.7
-
Tester raises bug:
"Error when loading application in Opera 11.1"
Current Opera version - 48
No tester. Just. Fucking. No6 -
Don't be ridiculous and say Mac's are good for gaming 😣, they aren't.
Their graphics are terrible CPUs are shocking ram ... Average the fact they have fast ssds is great
But that's it. For their price points it's not worth it end of story
I used to say Mac's are worth getting if your a designer or video editor...
I have now changed my position due to the shittyness of their latest products
I'm not really much of a gamer anymore to busy 😓 but I can read specs.
People won't build games for Mac's especially now it will lower the quality of their product. I actually don't even see a point of having a Mac in today's world.
Apple are meant to push boundaries ... They are doing it all wrong now 😐
Accept it... And get a PC 5 times faster then their apple counterparts
I do fucking hate apple but I respected them in the past, if nothing but their clever marketing getting sheep to buy their products . Now I just don't respect them, they could at least try to build something remotely worth the money20 -
There are no stupid questions.
Just look at stack overflow... Plenty of stupid questions with answers1 -
When you have to convince any non programming friend that, no, you cannot just program his Video game ideas just like that...3
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THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A "MINI APP" AND NO, JUST BECAUSE YOU THREW A "MINI" IN FRONT OF IT, IT DOESN'T MAKE IT ANY EASIER TO DEVELOP3
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Just realized no one in my class knew that Stack Overflow was an actual thing, not just the website. Too much Java I guess :D10
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Give me a 10 year old application with no comments, layers of spaghetti code, global variables, embedded SQL, and a text editor with no debugging; just don’t make me write Excel formulas.6
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Venting some anger, this is a long one
<rant>
So last Friday we had a 'Christmas' party at work... Only it wasn't a Christmas party... Because that would be racist against people who don't celebrate Christmas (of whom they are none at work), also no Christmas songs, because of the same reason and because it looked unprofessional... They also removed karaoke... (an Christmas tradition at the office) Because again, it was unprofessional
But we all got a Christmas card... Strange because we weren't allowed to celebrate it 😑 and the message in that card was one of the most standard messages I've ever seen, something like
Hello $name, we enjoyed working with you in 2017, let's make 2018 even better, merry Christmas
MERRY CHRISTMAS!? BUT THAT'S RACIST WASN'T IT!!!???
W T F !
also our sales guy did a speech, the following is an actual quote
'software is an amazing product'
Yeah mate, software is the product... Totally not the stuff we create with it
Sorry if people get/are offended in anyway, but if you decide that having a Christmases party at work is racist in any way or form, then don't have a party at all... Not some lame half Christmas party...
</rant>12 -
If some of you missed this gem in stackoverflow answers, I bring it once again!
More fun @ http://meta.stackoverflow.com/q/...
6 -
Just when I deactivated Facebook I found devrant. Hmm no regrets 😁 (thanks to Google play's homepage).4
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Windows you absolute bitch. No prompt, nothing. Just started updating in the middle of my unsaved homework.
31 -
How does the new MacBook pro outsell Microsoft surface and dell XPS 😖 are there so many "sheep" out there who buy a 1300+ machine with 2 (max 4 ports) not including the 17 dongles you'll need?
Sorry if I offended anyone but I just think the new MBP is ridiculous and is definitely not "Pro"15 -
Have I mentioned lately how much I LOVE the stability of slack (and electron apps in general)?
Got notified of a new message in slack, clicked the channel and this is what I see, even after a restart. No content or UI controls of any kind are being rendered. No workspaces, no loading spinners, no errors, no warnings ... just nothing.
I don't give a fuck about your integrations, apps, giphy, video calls, search, threading ... I just want to read text.
Piece of fucking shit
9 -
I just saw this picture on the product page of a Thunderbolt dock. I'm not sure what this guy is doing, but no programmer of the world would mirror his laptop screen on two full size screens. Just no!
11 -
That moment you realise why you enjoy the dev life again.
It's been a long time since I've had a solid day of coding, just coding..., no meetings, no wild requests, no crazy issues, no data fixing because someone can't type a number correctly, just me, myself and that keyboard going on a field trip of quality coding time again.
Ah, it's a good day to end the week on!3 -
My web hosting company, DigitalOcean, sent me a sticker via mail out of the blue.
No explanation, no letter, just the sticker. I just found this to be super awesome.
7 -
Today I made like the dirtiest hack I ever made. I needed to convert people's birthdate into days (starting from 0), and then had to find out the oldest person. It didn't work, because the output was the youngest person... So instead fixing the mistakes in my code, I simply made the value be negative ¯\_(ツ)_/¯2
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I've just realised the dual monitor computer option (for Dev Avatar) has no computer, it's just two monitors.7
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- Let's use jquery to fix this
- No
- But it will work just fine
- I'd rather re-write the code and not use jquery in an angular project
- ...
- NO!10 -
Just updated to the latest insider build for Windows 10.. left PC unattended and came back later and it was ready... no BSODs, no random crashes, no issues, nothing... it just works as expected...
I can hear Linux fanatics screaming after reading this 😂
FUCK all this Windows stereotypes BS going on here13 -
I don't want no sticker and no stressball, i just want to read some dev rants and design my devRant avatar3
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The code im writing is so ugly that i am tempted to pay for github pro, just so i can hide it from society :D
I never thought that not coding for six months could do this much damage9 -
The CI just errored out with no explanation.
Like nothing...
Just code 127 on bash...
I think the CI hates me
5 -
I don't know what it is but, isnit just me or does anyone else just find writing JavaScript really fun?
No... Just me? Ok cool14 -
"...we're using Java. That fat bitch doesn't just eat memory, she just deep-throated her sixth serving and is showing no signs of relenting"
-Me, 2k182 -
God was able to create an entire world in just 6 days for the sole reason that he had no previous versions and no compatibility issues.🌍7
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Desktop SSD just failed. All VMs lost. Domain admins too drunk to fix. No timesheets no sprint diary no mail no IM.6
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Turns out Google round off the answer automatically, just like that, no side note, nothing, just round off.
7 -
So came across an emoji language the other day. I have no words just emojis http://www.emojicode.org/9
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No. Just no. The null pointer exception didn't come from my DB, it came from your Java code, so go away and fix it.2
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Just asked something on stackoverflow.
Has been 15min already. And still no downvote and no comment saying “fuck off”
Today is a good day.
🙃
Sorry for wrong tag. This ain’t a rant. I was just thinking “so? -> rant”5 -
I used vs code for a solid 3 years, but my friend has been using notepad. No color coding. No dark theme. No auto commenting. No suggestions. Just plain black text in a white box.
Like a psychopath.5 -
Ok, a few days ago I recommended contabo.com as a good and cheap VPS, because our company uses it and it is blazingly fast. BUT! I am definitely NOT doing this!
"False or fraudulent orders are commonplace on the Internet. We have to take measures to prevent such false or fraudulent orders. Our system has identified your order as a possible false order. We must now prove your order as a valid order, otherwise we cannot provide you with the services you bought. We need your help with this. Please send us a copy of your passport or national identity card or something similar which corresponds to the data you have provided to us. Alternatively, you can send us your telephone or electricity bill if it contains your address. The address must match the address you provided on our homepage. It is sufficient if you simply take a photo of the document. The only purpose of this is to prove your order as authentic. This is why it does not matter which of the mentioned documents you send us and it does not matter if you make a scan or take a photo. A scammer could not provide any of these documents, this means one document is already enough to prove that your order is authentic and valid."14 -
Just started a new job! No rant material so far, I'm just grateful, i was out of work because of the 'rona4
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Yes, i'm a programmer
No, I do not install windows and drivers
No, I don't know what is the best laptop for you
No, I don't know why your internet is lagy
I'm sorry, I'm just a programmer6 -
Just loooovvve working on a day when the people at the client's have a holiday. No calls, no emails, no standups...just me and IDE1
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Just overheard somebody discussing about adding in IE8 support for the website. Please no... Just don't.3
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I'm on a train paying no attention to what station I'm at... Only just noticed there are no announcements in this cabin... Must... Pause... Devrant...binge...2
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60 hour work week deserves down time....no code, just immersion...feel like I'm being watched though
6 -
Today I got a segmentation fault in C#.
No pointers. No unmanaged dependencies. Just managed code. Seg fault.
Uhhhh...20 -
Just spend the last 2 hours fixing the email server for sites which get next to no visits and no one uses the contact form.
It's Friday evening FFS I don't care if it's a 'Company Priority' I just want to go home.3 -
My strategy is really really dumb. I go outside and smoke... ive done this for so long that im now at the point that im terrified that if i stop smoking i wont get unstuck. pathetic isnt it?3
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No one tests in production like I do..
Just gave the wife a Brazilian wax for the first time.
I guess I could have tried on the dog first but ... No.3 -
I thought SQL was supposed to be very easy? I'd like to jump off a balcony right now because of it ...
I don't know if I'm just dumb or if my sources for learning are bad or idk
maybe I'm just tired and dislike SQL2 -
I really just came across this on a legit apartment rental website.
I can see no possible way for this to go wrong.
No possible way that anyone could exploit this... 🙃
20 -
When you spend 10x time coding just because you can't, just can't resist writing good code, even when you no it's gng to make no difference whatsoever🙁
Why brain, oh why?4 -
Well paid java dev. But the HW/SW-Stack is awful.
Monitor: single 1600x1024
5yr old notebook, old i5, magnetic hdd
Forced to use windows 7
No maven server
No CI server
SVN but no git
Eclipse, no intelliJ
No sonar server
There are days where I just can't take it anymore.11 -
I don't have a life.
So I'm back at work on a Saturday afternoon (admittedly, I prefer this to staying home or going out to ... Clubbing? Idk what the youth does nowadays) and just about every sound frightens me. Like, I don't mind the squeaky building, but my hormones are off and just about everything sends me into a panic mode. (my mental health rn is... funny 😬) so, I was thinking, I should make something thay covers up the squeaks. Like, plays something classic over squeaks.
... Now, "psychopaths in your area" could use this to their advantage and direct their own music pieces. 👀10 -
Somebody pays for this domain 👍
Translation: www.if-loop.de
There are no if-loops, just if-statements!
-
Devs: There is to much work for the team size, can we say no or wait to the business?
Mgmt: Here are some staff aug contractors.
Later
Devs: They are screwing things up.
Mgmt: Then manage them better, it’s your work they are doing.2 -
Does anyone here just wake up and feel shitty for absolutely no reason why ? When I say absolutely no reason means none whatseover from previous day etc . I wanna know if it's just me 😅4
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I know I'm writing the correct integration tests when each one I add uncovers a new bug.
Still, it would be nice if just one of them passed first time.1 -
Weee both projects from yesterday went perfect...
Usual most of my projects end up fucked up because I want to do stuff I don't know how to... (well, I'm learning so I don't get frustrated, just pick up another idea).
Air cooler for power people V 1.1 works perfect. Today we will get almost 40 C and I feel the cold air in my face.
2 -
Just in case anyone has missed it: VSauce is probably one of the best channels on youtube. Just so that no one misses out4
-
Just passed the Salesforce Platform Developer I exam with no section below 83% :) I need another beer.2
-
Request I saw today...
* A new, empty AWS Account
* The ability to run 120 high memory EC2 instances, including up to 80 instances of dl1.24xlarge, but don't worry, 40 of them will be spot instances. I'll probably just start with two m5.xlarge for simplicity.
* VPC Peering into our primary AWS network
* VPC Peering into a 3rd party's network (because we're paying them for this service)
* A couple cross-acount IAM roles
* Granting "AWS: AdministratorAccess" to said IAM roles
I'm a bit behind schedule, and this is urgent. When will you have this completed?2 -
I just fucking hate compiling this fucking C# (ASP.NET) code and then transferring to staging server. Fuck you.....no no no listen to me fuck you and fuck this shit.8
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web dev agency makes a job ad that fits exactly my skill set.
*send an email in a good form with resume and everything*
No acceptance, no decline, no "we'll look at it", just nothing...
just fucking die already -_ -4 -
After hours of development, updated code on server, closed ide, out of habbit oppened browser, went to http://localhost/, just to check how api is responding... No response. Restarted server. No response. 30 minutes of random tests/checks, no result at all. 30 nervous minutes later, realized that server was working fine... it's just me who freaking tried to access it via localhost. ffs 0_0
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Thinking about going full bum and just hike national parks until I die. No job, no possessions, no electronics, no hell, no heaven, no nothing - just living totally in nature - and if I die? So what 🤷♂️4
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FUCK
I really wanna love Rust. I really, really do. But no inheritance is just such a stupid decision. But inheritence bad REEEE. No. Just no. Composition only works fine for some things because it just isn't powerful enough to properly (without performance penalty or boilerplate, that is) emulate inheritance. Some things are just better with inheritance: Games, UI, html or xml libs, etc. Now I have to use stupid fucking workarounds because oh no we cannot implement inheritance because that's scary and might give the programmers to much power. I can decide when I want to use inheritance or composition for myself, dickheads9 -
Oriented Object design class today, introducing inheritance with squares-rectangles and circles-ellipses.
No don't do that.
It's the worst example ever. It does not work. Just no, stop3 -
The four day rewrite of my codebase did... nothing...
No improvement. No detriment.
Just nothing...
Okay then.10 -
Did anyone ever thought of just shutting down their systems, taking their bagpack and just straight away go on a break ?
No office phone calls!
No worries!
Just some quality you-tine.11 -
Ffs
var filteredList = HugeList. Where(Condition);
if(filteredList.Count() > 0)
DoSomething(filteredList.First());
Just no. Please.10 -
Gives an award winning VR idea to our 'Digital Manager'
Says it's too hard for us to do ( it wasn't ) , goes out and pitches it to another digital agency for 'Help', ( mainly coz of the freelance commission )
They go ahead with the idea and make their campaign with it.
we don't get anything. no credit, nothing.
I wonder how the hell someone become a manager with that much of stupidity.2 -
no, we're not changing the world.. we're just building "textbox over database derpy enterprise solutions"1
-
Hetzner. Very cheap no nagging, no support bullshit, Lots of options, Just does what it does.
Did I mention their pricing?6 -
I started a new project and only use PHP, HTML, CSS and vanilla JS. No Frameworks. No React. No Vue.
The browser loads the page instantly, there is virtually no loading time and it just works.12 -
Unbelievable !!! In reference to this: https://devrant.com/rants/2131796/...
The process that was killing performance was, Watchman! I don't even understand I don't have any node stuff running why is watchman starting on system boot ... it was taking sweet 512MB of RAM
Everything now runs smoothly ...3 -
My phone just died. Got a new phone on recommendation of friends and flash Jolla on it. The OS is super nice but the "Android support" doesnt work. No lastpass, no netflix, no prime, signal works half, no banking app.
I really need my windows phone back. It just worked without issues. After two android phones and now a Jolla in about two years im kinda done with all this shit.14 -
just plan ahead? there's no point in doing a meeting where no one has thought about the subject beforehand or, even worse, if the interested parties are not present1
-
Looking forward to trying out ChromeOS for a while.
I like the idea of a minimal OS. Frankly while Windows, macOS and Linux are all incredible bits of engineering, they all suck ass and are maddeningly frustrating.
Usually I'm on a computer to complete a task and just want the OS to quietly do its job and leave me out of its myriad personal crises. I don't want to see or hear from that fucker.
If experience tells me anything it's that I'll be swearing at the Chromebook within the week.
But, the fact I'm trying shows I haven't lost hope.5 -
How NOT to cross compile code to Windows:
Chrome Remote Desktop →
Shitty Wi-Fi hotspot →
Mac at home →
VirtualBox Windows VM6 -
Rejection 4 / 1000 of my 1000 job applications TikTok journey
Another reply with apsolutely no constructive feedback for me. No explanation why they decided not to choose me. Just fuck you we'll go for the next one. No. Fuck YOU
7 -
I have an internal perception of myself. It isn't an image like a memory is, and it's not a description such as a sentence, but it's purely a feeling. I feel it in the core of my soul, not my body. And when I listen to Minecraft volume Alpha, it transforms my internal perception for the duration of album and the feeling lingers afterwards.
By now I must have a year of in game time and hearing those sounds and seeing the old textures brings be back to the days of middle school playing Minecraft Pocket Edition Lite on my first phone.
I wasn't happier back then. I'm just as happy today as I was back then. But restoring my inner self to that time, just briefly, is wonderful.
I'm thankful to Minecraft for being a great game. It has seen many changes in it's public perception. In the beginning, it was for all ages. Deadmau5 played it, notch developed it. It was a different beast. Then, without the content of the game changing at all, it became a child's game. Then it became a child's game that PewDiePie played and it was acceptable to play without any shame again. And now, once again, it is on a downward slope to being a child's game.
No matter what the shifting sands of public view on the game is, I will always hold this game close to my heart and I will continue to play it whether it's socially acceptable or not. If for nothing else than to remind my soul of a simpler time.1 -
This is why you don't hire your son's friend to build your company's website. From a live (new) customer site that needs to be rewritten:
<h2><span class="wsite-text wsite-headline">
<font size="6"><font size="5"><font size="4"><font size="3"><font size="4"><font size="5"><font size="6"><font size="7"><font size="7"><font size="7"><font size="7"><font size="7"></font></font></font></font></font></font></font></font></font></font></font></font><strong><font color="#e4e3f1" size="7">***REDACTED TITLE***</font></strong>
</span></h2>7 -
Just disabled JS in my browser. It required adding devrant to allowlist though, but otherwise so far so good. Especially on garbage sites like wired: no more popups, no cookies, no tracking, no yOu'Ve ReaChEd yOuR dAiLy lImIt bs…1
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Apparently, drake made a song called "Kiki do you love me".
No. Just no.
Too bad it was you and not MF Doom.8 -
There's no provisioning script. Code repo's there, but no configuration files. Missing folders that break the app. No documentation on what to install, what directories to create, NO instructions. Nothing. Just an empty Ubuntu vagrantbox and a git repo. Took the entire morning and then some, just to replicate the dev environment. Fuck
-
November is coming up. That means no mental illness month. Absolutely no front end or JS shit all month. Because it is going to be officially:
"No Nutjob November"
So keep your AOK ass to yourself in November!
(AOK, if you see this, we miss you!)4 -
TLDR: Detect site visitors browser and conditionally load a Citrix frame rather than rendering the site
The request came about 3 days after launching a new project to production. For several months before that moment we had reviewed and confirmed the supported browser matrix. As you might guess plans tend to go up in smoke as we approach and pass launch. Now that we're live after all, it would be the tine to lose our damn minds rather than bask in the warmth of a successful launch for 5 minutes.
Anyway as for the actual request, after those first few days the client PM realized a FEW people were actually using IE8 and was now panicking that it was unsupported. On my way out of the building that day he asked if we could detect the browser and rather than render the site load a frame to a Citrix session that would be running the latest IE... -
Not really a rant but..... Just found this while cleaning my PSP's Memory Stick collection
As a CS student this part makes me feel gud
(It's No Game No Life btw)
2 -
- The golden rule of CoffeeScript is: "It's just JavaScript".
- Nice!
- And provides a basic class structure that allows you to name your class, set the superclass, assign prototypal properties, and define the constructor, in a single assignable expression.
- No nO NO NO! -
Use CoffeeScript they said, it will be fun they said.
NO! No, no, no, no!!!
Fuck this.
Converting old library written in coffescript to ES6 is just fucking insane.
I see 1000 lines of code to take me at least several hours if not a whole day.
and tests are yet to come. -
For crying out loud, no, GoDaddy, you don't just shutdown expired domain without ANY warnings. No!!! Not cool!!!5
-
No matter what you do the universe just tries to beat and let you down, you just have to let go and trust your wit!1
-
I just love getting asked about tasks that I had no idea that even existed because no one told me.1
-
Is it me or most developers just write code so it compiles and passes tests?
No documentation, no standards, no "good practices", no"good design", no software principles, no performance analysis, nothing.1 -
Where did we get lost in the war against fuel guzzling cars and pollution to where now people are just paid to drive around endlessly who don’t even enjoy driving around ? Where did all these efforts go ?
I blame all levels of industry for making a good paying job mean no family no exercise no public transportation no sleep no travel13 -
What are the rules in a general work environment if a developer gets slightly violent?
(Emphasis on "slightly")
What happens to that developer in such case?6 -
How to install windows, when there is no network boot support, no USB and you are on Linux?
I did it through vmware, just ran using the current hdd.2 -
Sr Engineers that want other to just do what they say with no context or explanation
You are probably right but just explain why!3 -
I just can't wait for Ai, the day will be so beautifully ecstasy filled.
Just sit there, talking, saying what you want, no bugs.
oh my5 -
I thing anybody will agree. Just whisper these words slowly: "Microsoft. Exchange. Server."
Just no.4 -
When the company running my student accommodation not only stores the passwords for their resident portal in plain text and emails them straight to you in the case of a forgotten password. But also generates your password at sign up according to a specific general pattern...2
-
My stupid Messages app won't send urls with a .xyz on the end. No error, no explanation. It just won't send. What the fuck?1
-
What the fuck is going on with elementary OS 0.4 Loki?!
Its the worst performing OS I have ever used:
* login ==> just shows desktop wallpaper, no icons, no dock, no keyboard inputs, no shit!
* installs updates in background ==> ne keyboard inputs, no reaction at all
Wtf did you guys do, when changing to unbuntu?!8 -
Just use a promise that sets this variable, and then you can use the variable as long as its after the promise declaration.
No, just no. Thats not now asynchronous code works.2 -
It was back in 2010, they told me to build a simple CRUD system, habe me 2 hours, just to see the code structure/style.
Was it hard? No! I handed it in after 30min, the remaining time I got to talk to the devs. Was nice. No bullshit, no whiteboard, just a laptop and an IDE.6 -
About JS WYSIWYG editors.
When you're working on a project that does require a such editor, which solution do you usually chose and why ?
- existing library (which one ?)
- coding your own
- no fancy editor, just markdown
- no fancy editor, just bbcode or equivalent6 -
No Problem Android Studio, just get completly fucked up. It's not like if i would need to finish this course before thursday, no i definitly have time for this shit.
1 -
wow Xfinity just wow.... how retarded can you be... I ordered the "self install kit" which the person on the phone said included a modem, a router, and the cables to hook everything up... the package came, and it's just the cables. no modem. no router. just wow.
-
A life with no adventure and rough times is like a movie with no suspense. I'd probably doze off half the times.
I mean: no bullets in the air and Chuck Norris is not risking everything for his daughter?
Damn, just shoot me :(2 -
All mandatory tasks complete for the week, no meetings, no distractions, time to go back to the default of documentation........ahhh email just in from nodeweekly!
-
Just got an "no-reply" email that wants me to click a link for customer satisfaction survey. No company name, no whatever, just plain text and the sender is "no-reply@nestor.com" Is there a way to find out where did they get my email?!4
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Lost my voice... Not needed in a programmer 😅 people keep telling me ... I feel we are the most vocal kinds of people... Passionate to a fault
-
Complaining about no dark theme? Just be like me - add one to your projects!
#NewProject #TimeForAnApp
12 -
trying to rediscover specific pieces of tribal knowledge with no documentation and no starting point...
guess I'll just start grepping servers until I find a clue -
I just made a complete list of 185+ excellent no-code tools you can use to build your next million-dollar app.
Visit: https://zerobizz.com/p/...
7
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