Map, Filter and reduce explained!

Well okay..

Loved the first project at the university. Your game had to load a map from txt file and create a labirynth with a player inside. It shoud include a bird's eye view and FPS-like - all using only console characters. There were some bonus points - for example for animation or built-in map editor. (language was C)

So I'm working on a live map of my school's bus system, and I needed some filler images to test out how the stops were being drawn on each route...and honestly wish I could push this version to production

A programmer is walking along a beach and finds a lamp. He rubs the lamp, and a genie appears. “I am the most powerful genie in the world. I can grant you any wish, but only one wish.”

The programmer pulls out a map, points to it and says, “I’d want peace in the Middle East.”

The genie responds, “Gee, I don’t know. Those people have been fighting for millenia. I can do just about anything, but this is likely beyond my limits.”

The programmer then says, “Well, I am a programmer, and my programs have lots of users. Please make all my users satisfied with my software and let them ask for sensible changes.”

At which point the genie responds, “Um, let me see that map again.”

Bill gates found a bottle in his garden.
He decided to rub it thrice (whyever) and a geany surged.

Bill gates: h.. He.. Hello?
Geany : hi, im willing to give you one wish as you saved me
Bill gates: I WANT WORLD PEACE, HERE IS THE MAP WITH ALL THE WARS ON THE WORLD!!
Geany: thats impossible. Other wishes?
Bill gates: fix every bug in windows vista!
Geany: gimme that world map

Other people : she said yes :') :')

Me: the client accepted the first draft without asking for changes :') :')

Now we can say that " Hey Siri, open Google Assistant "

Rant!!

Girlfriend call me while am at a meeting.
I mute my phone...
She calls again and again for the 3rd time back to back. I leave the meeting stating this might be important..

I answer the call...

Me: hey babe , all okay ?
She: you’re busy ?
Me: yeah sorta , tell me wassup ?
She : if you’re busy then it’s okay we can talk later
Me: it’s all right . Are you okay ?
She : yes, but if you’re busy we can talk later ..

Me :(FUCKKKKKKKK THIS FUCKING FUCK WOMEN LOGIC, HOW THE FUCK DO YOU EXPLAIN THIS)
The above statement was said internally

Me:(in reality) you sure babe? I’ve left the meeting so I can talk..

She: nothin much I was suppose to be in your area in a couple of hours so wanted to know if you could meet

My boss thinks once the UI is made , the backend and integration shouldn’t take more than 15 minutes.

I want to kick him on the dark side of his moon

My non-dev boyfriend installed Python via the command line and ran a server to render a map of Pokémon in his neighborhood. I don't know whether to be impressed or scared 😂

Kudos for the mall display map that does not pay a license to Microsoft

My map generator(rewritten in swift) produced its finest continent... after 40 minutes...

Boss man: your code has issues , you should strive to have lesser bugs.

Me: GTA was made due to a bug in the their code.
*mic drop, leaves office, clapping heard in background*

😂

The great linux world map

JS map, filter, reduce...

Making fun of a skinny/fat person working out is like making fun of an uneducated man trying to learn

This dude is using 4 screens for work. When I asked for another screen at work,
I can't convince my boss for 2, FML

To the dude who got 4 screens, congratulations, and sorry I used your image without permission. BTW
You lucky bastard

It's the biggest satisfaction to know that Wix means wank in German!
"why not do it yourself" just adds to it.

That moment when you realise:
money != Happiness
Stickers === Happiness

Shout out for dfox for +1 ing our rants even if they are shitty . Way to go dfox!!! 😂

I often think in if statements ..

A programmer was walking along the beach when he found a lamp. Upon rubbing the lamp a genie appeared who stated "I am the most powerful genie in the world. I can grant you any wish you want, but only one wish."

The programmer pulled out a map of the Mediterranean area and said "I'd like there to be a just and last peace among the people in the middle east."

The genie responded, "Gee, I don't know. Those people have been fighting since the beginning of time. I can do just about anything, but this is beyond my limits."

The programmer then said, "Well, I am a programmer and my programs have a lot of users. Please make all the users satisfied with my programs, and let them ask sensible changes"

Genie: "Uh, let me see that map again."

Every job description out there:
" JUNIOR XY position.
Requirements: 50 years experience of Assembly, Java and Masonry, HTML, cloud based computing and artificial intelligence. Must be able to write algorithms like Hummingbird. Fluent in English, Mandarin and Latin. Must have five doctor and two Bachelor degrees. Experience in leading a Fortune 500 company benefitial.
Renumeration: 5 rice grains"

So my CEO wants me to move to architecting systems!!!!!!!! My dream since a kid !!!

It seems like a mad job where you're a crazy scientist 😂
What should I read or do to be better ?

Just make up your mind hacker news :

I just can't understand what will lead an so called Software Company, that provides for my local government by the way, to use an cloud sever (AWS ec2 instance) like it were an bare metal machine.

They have it working, non-stop, for over 4 years or so. Just one instance. Running MySQL, PostgreSQL, Apache, PHP and an f* Tomcat server with no less than 10 HUGE apps deployed. I just can't believe this instance is still up.

By the way, they don't do backups, most of the data is on the ephemeral storage, they use just one private key for every dev, no CI, no testing. Deployment are nightmares using scp to upload the .war...

But still, they are running several several apps for things like registering citizen complaints that comes in by hot lines. The system is incredibly slow as they use just hibernate without query optimizations to lookup and search things (n+1 query problems).

They didn't even bother to get a proper domain. They use an IP address and expose the port for tomcat directly. No reverse proxy here! (No ssl too)

I've been out of this company for two years now, it was my first work as a developer, but they needed help for an app that I worked on during my time there. I was really surprised to see that everything still the same. Even the old private key that they emailed me (?!?!?!?!) back then still worked. All the passwords still the same too.

I have some good rants from the time I was there, and about the general level of the developers in my region. But I'll leave them for later!

Is it just me or this whole shit is crazy af?

People here are arguing about a guy using MS word as a HTML IDE,
My boss once showed me how blind people read "colors" by running his fingers over the phone screen.

Just spoke with another teams developer. (She's using Java)

Her: so we get a json object from your service, I want an array
Me: well that's not what you said in the specs... And it's not hard since it's just a Map
Her: what Map? It's JSonObject I need an Array
Me: give me the library your using..
Her: here...

I Google the documentation and methods and paste the link and the methods to use:

-length (she also wanted count)
-toJsonArray

This ain't JS, just use the . operator and go thru all the methods' docs... Or learn to use Google

When u did too much geocoding and map stuff. People ask me where u live, i be like I live at lat 43.8 lng -79.3. Find me homie, let's chill

1790. Sad - gotta love some xkcd

No more rivals 😁.

Gotta love XKCD Fridays

Now that I have time to approach my ultimate dream ( being the pro penrester ) , asked a hacker for a road map and he gave me (U'll rarely see such open hackers that share knowledge :) )
Surprisingly I've been familiar with all the topics but being the most pro , requires u to be pro in every single topic .

Guess what ? I'm starting from basic linux commands all over again 😂
echo 'hello world :/'

Front end engineer road map for 2018

I'm sitting down with some people, and one girl starts ranting about smartphones and how they invade privacy, giving snapchat map (or whatever it's called) as an example.

So I'm like: You know you agree to all of the permissions an app asks for right? I remember when we developed Android apps pre-lollipop you gave us access on install.Now you get this big ass dialog saying "this app wants access to your location", so stop whining.

Her: wait you're one of these developers who develop such apps? Shame on you, human crap!

🤦‍♂️

When client compares his cheap 3 months old project App with well established multi Billion $ Bigwigs' Apps :|

"Look how cars are moving smoothly on map in UBER, I want something like that"

"Look how fast is GOOGLE Search"

"Look how AMAZON figures out what we want next"

Are you fuckin serious :|

beginner coder: figures out how to write a feature

average coder: knows a few different ways to write a feature. but not quite sure on which one to use.

master coder: meditates before starting a project. closes his eyes to map out the entire infrastructure of the project.

god coder: gets paid ALOT of money to guide people on the right to do it.

I feel like a e-hoarder, I keep tabs and sublime windows open and worry about closing them as they might contain important code...
FML

Map/Filter/Reduce

That awkward moment when your AliExpress package has travelled more countries than you ever have

You know the world is about to end when STACK OVERFLOW is down

Porting over code to python3 from python2 be like:
(Cakechat, in this case)

Day 0 of n of python 3 compatibility work:
This should be _easy_, just use six and do magic!

Day 1 of n:
Oh, true division is default instead of integer division, so I need to replace `/` with `//` in a few places.

Day 2 of n:
Oh, map in python2 behaves differently than map in python3, one returns a list, other an iterator. Time to replace it with `list(map())` then.

Day 3 of n:
Argh, lambdas don't evaluate automatically, time to fix that too.

Day 4 of n:
Why did I bother trying to port this code in the first place? It's been so long and I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT IS BROKEN BECAUSE THE STUFF RUNS WHEN I BREAKPOINT AND STEP THROUGH BUT NOT WHEN I RUN IT DIRECTLY?!

Day ??? of n:
[predicted]
*gives up*
I've had enough.

DevRant makes me really proud how well developers can act together as a group. Makes me think what we could accomplish if we would take all the world's developers and programmers to one place and make our own country. Our currency will be devCoin. World domination follows shortly afterwards

How can,
A big fucking corporation,
Have this many,
Stupid assholes,
Within,

So, recently we have added a feature to find nearest agents(users) in our app, yay,

Nothing fancy, just showing a list (of user data, address, distance, geographical position and such), if clicked will open a map app (deep link to google or else) showing the clicked user’s position

Then comes around the product owner relaying a message from the fucking “business guys”, and their request was,

“Can you make a url that can be shared in whatsapp or instagram, then when people clicked on it, it will open a map that shows all of our nearest users, and it must be accessible from public”

Never have I had the urge to act impolitely like today, well that’s what happens when an entire business division is ran by a bunch of fucking dinosaurs,

Once, when working on top down RPG, I woke up at 3am and wrote map moving system. It worked flawlessly. Later had to spend 2 days to understand how the fuck it actually worked.

Ahh nights so full of passion.

Computer Science Teacher: everyone do a route in PowerPoint
Me: Can I do it in HTML + Leaflet?
CST: Yes, but it would be easier to do in PowerPoint.
-- trim --
* opens up Glitch *
* creates new project *
* imports Leaflet *
* connects OSMs *
* connects Google Maps thru GoogleMutant *
-- trim of interesting story how I copypaste coordinates from Google Maps into polyline with my grandma telling me where anyting is (our village is poorly mapped) --
Me: thank grandma
* project finally done *
-- the following day --
Nobody did the map with a route
Me: yay
* shows map *
* a bully asks what app I used to make it *
* I said that the entire app is a huge app *

That moment when you're finally getting your user registration and login system up and running!
As a web dev student I feel like I have accomplished something :)

Get projects from companies and let students compete to complete those projects ,
Projects could be basic , but the students would get a good chance to see what is being done in real projects what tech is used.

How my lecturer drilled JS syntax into us:

Write this:
var x = document.element;
x.value = 10;

Instead of this:
document.element.value = 10;

His reasoning:
"You make the cake in the kitchen, you don't put icing on it on your way to present the cake"

You only know the value of a bad boss once you get a boss who's worse

I was asked to map a mathematical problem to an algorithm for first round of interview. I did it in 5 lines with O(n) and it worked. was told that was not the correct answer sent me an answer with O(n^2) and about 40 lines. in anger, I sent a five page mathematical proof along with analysis why mine was better. surprisingly, they took me in for second round. tanked it because I continually stuttered and froze. I was able to answer it once I got home. decided against sending it.

* Colleague asks how to make a alias for IP address
* Open up notepad++ w/ admin rights and load C:\Windows\System32\Drivers\etc\hosts in
* add a new entry to map IP to the alias
* hit sequence [ENTER][ESC]:wq[ENTER]
* wonder why is notepad window still there... Did it freeze again?

... happens to me all the time :(

Had my pure PHP web app rejected on a market platform because I didn't use a framework..
BITCH IT WORKS PERFECTLY WITHOUT A FUCKING FRAMEWORK, IF YOU WOULD HAVE TESTED IT YOU WOULD HAVE SEEN THAT!

This is a ways out because I can't find LED filaments thin enough to simulate this, but if/when I find them, how difficult would it be to program a controller to have them map my circulatory system, with them pulsing in time to my pulse? I want to do something cool with my arm, and this keeps coming into my head, but I'm freaking out over how difficult I'm thinking this is going to be.

Ideas? Either on how to do this, or what else I can (reasonably) do? Friends irl want a rocket punch, I want a flamethrower, but anything else?

Ummm, so tell me

It happened just now.

Yes, I put "there is no need to be upset 10 hours" on governmental terminal.

#hackerman

How? Well, I discovered that it was web ui, so random menu category -> random external governmental website with Google map on it -> you know the rest.

If you're using snapchat you might want to go on it immediately and change your privacy settings.
New update came out, they added a map with everybody's locations down to a couple of meters in accuracy... And the feature is on by default for EVERYONE to see, not just your friends.

What the actual fuck were they thinking?? Just think of all the ways this can go wrong.

chaosbot/chaos github repo looks like a London underground map.

Also, if you haven't seen this yet, it is a new project where code is updated by the community democratically.

Go give it a devrant hug of death.

CEO : this Facebook app has this great feature .

Me: yep, it’s really useful

CEO : can we make something like this in ours too ?

Me : we can sure try using this(x) method.

CEO : cool, I’ll add this into the sales team memo , and btw, it needs to be done in 2 days,
Me : but... but ...

Started part time job at a company, had to log my time on timesheets. Said fuck this and now the whole company logs their hours on a custom web based time logging system which I built.

Seems legit

StackOverflow is ruthless! You only have to breathe and you'll get downvoted!

Just to clarify thing, FaceID isn't the same tech as what we've had on Android.

In Android, it's based on image recognition. That's the reason it was so easy to bypass with a high resolution photograph.

In FaceID, it projects thousands of dots on your face and creates a depth inclusive map which is used for verification. That's the reason why it's supposed to work even if you have glasses on, etc

So please let's stop with the comparison

#1 GoogleMap map = null;
#2 map.clear();

I'm used to bad code, since i'm responsible for code review of acadamic projects. But when i saw that one and last year students saying they dont know the reason, i died a bit inside

Last week our department drama queen was showing off Visual Studio’s ability to create a visual code map.
He focused on one “ball of mud”, vilifying the number of references, naming, etc and bragging he’s been cleaning up the code. Typical “Oooohhh…this code is such a mess…good thing I’m fixing it all..” nonsense. Drama queen forgot I wrote that ‘ball of mud’

Me: “So, what exactly are you changing?”
DK: “Everything. It’s a mess”
Me: “OK, are any of the references changing? What exactly is the improvement?”
DK: “There are methods that accept Lists. They should take IEnumerables.”
Me: “How is that an improvement?”
<in a somewhat condescending tone>
DK: “Uh…testability. Took me almost two weeks to make all the changes. It was a lot of work, but now the code is at least readable now.”
Me: “Did you write any tests?”
DK: “Um…no…I have no idea what uses these projects.”
Me: “Yes you do, you showed me map.”
DK: “Yes, but I don’t know how they are being used. All the map shows are the dependencies.”
Me: “Do you know where the changes are being deployed?”
DK: “I suppose the support team knows. Not really our problem.”
Me: “You’re kinda right. It’s not anyone’s problem.”
DK: “Wha…huh…what do you mean?”
Me: “That code has been depreciated ever since the business process changed over 4 years ago.”
DK: “Nooo…are you sure? The references were everywhere.”
Me: “Not according to your map. Looks like just one solution. It can be deleted, let me do that real quick”
<I delete the solution+code from source control>
Me: “Man, sorry you wasted all that time.”

I could tell he was kinda’ pissed and I wasn’t really sorry. :)

When you have all the keys of the hash map, but you don't have the key to her heart.

boss: we should map all the possible ways to do things in the system so we can test them and make sure we fix the bugs.

Me: yeah, well, that is exactly what automated tests are for, every time we find a non-mapped way that breaks this we make a test out of it and fix, this ways we end up mapping the majority of ways.

Boss: yeah,yeah ... Let's sit down latter and map everything on a document.

I bet my ass we are never gonna have tests as a part of our workflow.

I couldn’t get a dev duck ,
So here comes Dev Spider-Man!!!
Well he’s obviously good at coding , cos you know , he works on the web 🤣

Client : Use google map because it has more data but make sure the location and navigation in the app as to look like Apple Map.
Me : 😧😧

The moment when you see "block chain" on a client's road map, but they can't tell you what that is or what they want to use it for

The joys of mapping...
I'm playing around with some cartographer parameters and this happened. Thought it fits the christmas theme and was kindas beautiful so decided to share.
It's a map snowflake :3

Some people just don't fucking understand that their ideas are shit. Or even if you have a usable idea that you can't make money on it.

I was watching Shark Tank and these guys go on with the simplest maps API app. Pretty much a single table database for where basketball games are. Then putting it on a map. That's it. And they were asked how they plan on making money and the answer was "better user experience". All you have is a fucking map! It's pointless. You're not making money on that unless you do a hell of a lot more!

The thing that really got me was how they were congratulated on learning how to make it. Good for you, it's great that you learned some programming for that. But while you did the simplest maps API plugin, someone with some machine learning junk was told that it wasn't good enough.

Trying to hire more good devs... it's surprisingly hard. Guy with supposed decade of JavaScript experience fails code test, "I don't really use map function so I don't know it."

R U kidding me

...and yet my "maybe we should consider remote devs" idea isn't getting any traction :/

Map that shows you how far you can travel within a certain time.

My favorite game just released a 3D map of their universe.

That's fucking awesome! How much work this had to be.... OwO

Any thoughts on whether my alternative keyboard layout will lower my risk for wrist pain? I map each key to an Amazon dash button on each edge of a large bookshelf in my office. It's lots of exercise, and I'm almost back up to my old typing speed.

That moment when a client is all upset about a tiny bit of cutoff of some text, but they haven't noticed they've been missing labels from their map for who knows how long...

Yesterday afternoon I had a meeting. The room they reserved was somewhere I have never been, but I have a map of the company, so thought it would be going to be fine.

Wrong.

Our company area is big. Very big. It's commonly called a town within the town. When you see it on a map you think, yeah that's pretty huge. But when you are in person on this area, only then you realize hiw ridiculously gigantic this thing is. We even have our own buslines.

I checked the map (this thing is a little worn out, but I thought I read it right) and was on my way in time. I found a door that said "109", which is the entry where the meeting was supposed to be. Went to the first upper floor. Increased security, no entry for me. Fuck. Began asking people, but noone even had an idea, where the room could be...
Because the meeting was towards the end of the day and I already was WAY too late, i went home. Next time, I'm gonna write down the attendants phone numbers so I can call them, when I can't find the room. Lesson learned.

Today. Received mail asking where I was, there had been 4 people (2 of them sub-department leaders (sadly I can't come up with a better translation)) waiting for me. It's funny, considering I'm only a student. I answered I was sorry, bla bla, I learned my lesson bla bla etc. Shortly after that the next meeting is scheduled for next monday, attached a map pedantically describing how to get to the room. Level of passive aggression > 9000.
Huh. Apparently there's another entrance 109 about kilometer further north. Interesting.

First personal project in my new employment.

This is the situation:

[ • ] Frontend
Drupal with custom module which load an Angular 6 application inside certain urls. Da hell for my eyes but interesting in somewhat.

[ • ] Back end
SharePoint "database" middled by a my-boss-written Java layer used to map SharePoint tokens in something more usable

Learning to use Lightroom,
First try...

The hardest part about editing photos is to not oversaturated them even when you feel warmer colours look better . I guess I overdid it

P.S. that’s me in the picture enjoying the sky pissing on my face (sarcasm intended)

Guess the developer did not expect this to happen.

Currently over at OpenStreetMaps.org (I requested a map for download)

So I wrote code to show the FUNCTIONALITY of my module , which has temporary variables and temporary code.
Boss after verifying : so it's done right ?
Me: no the code needs to be written .
Boss : but it's working...
Me : yeah , but this is a test environment , I need to put everything in place and test .
Boss : so it'll be done in 15 minutes right ?
Me : ...
Boss: ...

Tasked to create a product road map.

Beg for feedback.

Get no feedback.

Present product roadmap to key stake holders.

Bitching, nothing but bitching.

When the project your working on #GitUp map looks like an advanced level of guitar hero

Last night I had a panic attack and woke up in cold sweats because in the dream I had I was constantly using the wrong variables in the wrong places...

The devRant July 13 update and roadmap is amazing. Great recap of recent happenings and the map to an exciting future.
I am proud to to be part of this wonderful community.
devRant rules!

Hmmm, this feature that I added seems to make the whole process 50% longer. I need to optimize something. Let's see now...
Yeah, make that a shared resource and parallelize IO to leverage the multi-core architecture. Hash map for this, binary tree for that. This thing that gets called a million times can be written easily without a regexp. That thing can be rewritten in Rust as it's too demanding.

There! Works! And it's also a lot cleaner. Nice!

How's the performance doing? 70% longer.

I spent the last couple of days on working on a big and complex MOBA map for Wargroove... a.... turn based strategy game with hotseat online game.

When I saw people in the community forums talking about how it is (according to them) impossible with the editor mechanics to create a MOBA style map with similar gameplay and AI controlling the minions properly, I just jumped in after seeing that some people attempted it but mostly failed (with some little exceptions in the 1vs1 field).

And now I've got it. A full-fledged turn based, long MOBA map for 4 players (sadly that's Wargrooves human player limit. Otherwise it could be more).

I learned to like and hate the map editor.

I love it for how simple and fast it is.
I hate it for the missing features like using a counter for calculations or in texts.

I hate I had to create a lot of events twice or even more times because of the missing functionality.

I hate that my fingers hurt so much from using a controller for so much time.

And I hate that I loved it so much that I now got 47 hours in Wargroove without even playing it after the first 5 or 6 missions.

Looking forward to finally playing it.

Please devs, at least add a feature to use counters for something else than pure conditions if you create a map editor for your game.

Thanks. Was fun anyways.

Highschool teacher tells us to work on a little text game, gives us 2 weeks. I wrote about 1600 lines of code with enemys, random map, fighting system,... And generally blowing everything out of proportion as always, because I'm so bored

One of my android project finally compiled with no errors!!
Happiness increased when it didn't crash👻👻👻
Finally some relief 😊😊😊

Me after working on a complex UI given by the designer

Me: it’s done
Designer: the underline is off by 1px
Me: yeah , that how the css accommodates according to smaller screen , it’ll still look like the UI you gave on the bigger screen.
Designer : it hasn’t come out as expected , let’s change the UI and try something new here
ME (inside): YOU PEICE OF SHIT , you should have either spoken to me before designing the UI to know what could be done , or either be happy with the 1% different in the real UI and your “photoshop image”
Me(outside): as you say

Damn open street map must be one of the most awesome open source projects out there. I spent the entire day rendering maps for no particular use. But it was just so much fun to explore all this work and all these little additions made by such a huge amount of strangers working together with no motivation other than creating something beautiful. Stuff like this restores my faith in humanity :)

It's rant time!

So, as a broke electrical engineering student, I got this job in a local company. They used JSF and my skills in java were, at the very least, small (former PHP developer). But as a self taught developer this didn't stopped me and I went full on java learning (very bad year for my EE studies).

I became the 'guy in charge' for several of their projects (yeah, they did exploited broke students, I realized this far too late). I was very proud of myself, I worked hard, showed my true value, and they became impressed.

One nice thursday night, my "handler" emailed me with a urgent request. They needed an entire jsf application done by monday and the requirements were fairly complex.

Oh boy, I had a total of 10h of sleep from thursday to monday. I didn't even slept before going to my monday class, but I delivered the system. Got an pat in the back... "you're awesome"... I was happy.

6 months later: I received an email asking to fix a bug in the system. No problem with that. Oddly, this bug was a MAJOR bug. There's no way the system worked properly for six months with it. I fixed it in no time and commited the changes.

Turns out that this was the first time the system was going to be deployed. They made me go in an insane weekend dev project, and didn't even used the system for SIX MONTHS!!! I started to work my way out the company after this, aiming to open my own software company.

I still remember some other rants from the time I worked there. But these are for later.

Nice week for you all, may the sprint go gently and the clients be kind.

I knew I was destined for programming when I was 11 or so, and I would spend my days after school until bedtime building levels with the Doom map builder. Shortly after that I begged my parents for a C++ for dummies book. Never looked back.

Was creating an interactive map through Google Maps API. The map wasn't displaying at all on the website. Spent 2 hours trying to fix. Just realized I've not given height to the map div :-/

Computer engineering : Insanity!!!

Today a friend of mine was assigned to make a Client-Server Encryption using Sockets. The guy did a great job applying BlowFish algorithm, but the teacher was disappointed because she couldnt map letters to the encrypted text and she declared the program to be wrong!!!

Errors be like "Source.ts 44:38", Source.ts has 28 lines. Alrighty.

Secretly installed Automate app on my friend's Android phone to mess with him. (For those who don't know, with Automate you can automate anything on an Android device).
Made a 'flow' that would read his incoming sms's, and send an email to me with his exact location if I sent him an SMS saying 'where are you?'.
Was funny to mess with him and tell him his exact location even though we were miles apart.
Cleared it up for him a while later but it made me feel like #hackerman

At my last job, I created a Google Map for a client, where you could click on any department from France, and it would tell you about all the antennas (think "outpost") of his society. I used a Google Fusion Table where I registered everything: the datas to display, the coordinates for every departments and for every region.

I then wrote a 15-pages long document to tell how to maintain that, since I used my personal Google account to create the map. Anyone having a full access to the website should be able to recreate the map from nothing and witout writing a single line of code.

Then I switched project, the company kind of fucked me over, and I just received a mail saying that Google Fusion Table will be put down in a year.

I just hope they didn't receive the mail.

when you are asked a yes/no question but your input doesn't really matter...

No No No

Story from when game disks were in fashion
I asked my best buddy to burn a disk of GTA vice city so that I can install it on my desktop.
The next day when I receive the disk and insert it into my PC I almost fell of my chair laughing cause that douche bag had copied the icon from his desktop to the disk and burned it .
I almost fell laughing not because what he did , but because he did so when he was in his final year of his IT degree 🤣🤣🤣

Honestly, I'm crazy fucking excited about ML, blockchain and containerisation.

Their applications outside traditional computing are what does it for me. I'm hoping to learn a shit ton of python and ML so I can apply it to help my significant others family research using Molecularly Imprinted Polymers to find and treat cancers.

I'd like to build statistical models of varying types and progressions of cancer and map how the MIPs help and interact so they can be better optimised.

SCIENCE, BITCHES!

Want to relax.......
its just a road map to success

After working for months , I've understood that we should overestimate the time that will be taken to complete a task
But now it's getting annoying , I mean It's been a week I finished my project and am ideal ,

Btw, the project timeline was a week , ( I finished the work in a day )

Someone 3D printed the original Legend of Zelda world map!! I WANT ONE!!

Rant other than other rants this week

As much as I love using a mechanical keyboard ,I fucking hate the taps it makes when others use it

It’s like this constant hammer,
FUCK YOU BITCHES , don’t fucking hit it likes there’s no tomorrow !!!

when lyrics actually hittin you and then it happens...

FUCKING FUCK ANGULAR!!!!
LIKE FUCK IT IN THE ARSE AND BURN THE MOTHERFUCKER WHILE LAUNCHING A MISSILE ON IT TO BE SURE!

(ﾉ≧∇≦)ﾉ ﾐ ┸━┸

So I am making something on angular and I got everything running in ng serve(development environment) , after handling all issues and showing it to my boss man he approves and asked to put it up on prod for a demo , doesn’t sound like an issue , I make the prod build on cli and BAM! 16 errors ? No issues right?, I’ll just google the issue. Googles.... there aren’t no clear solutions to it as the angular version keeps changing and nobody knows what broke it, I mean people have the issue,but like 100 reasons that can cause it,
HOLY LORD RELEASE A NEWER VERSION AFTER MENDING THE OLD ONE
But nooooooo!

Angular Dev:We fucked this one, lol what should we do boss man?
Angular boss man: lol just leave it, we need to build the new version with newer bugs,

P.S. I like angular, but it’s like a underdeveloped framework, too many issues and too many changes

my teacher genuinely asked the class, which one is better GUI or CLI? everyone said GUI except me, he asked why? (the reason he was expecting from me was something different) i said, "CLI differentiate us from those who just click and realise that how simple is this to operate and why are we being heavily paid?"

Being 46 and finally having the chance to focus on software development after years of BA/PM roles, flogging the market trying to get a junior gig, then one day painting a shed with my 16 year old who I introduced to programming about 6 months ago and listen to him speak at length on protocol programming, finer variances between python and swift and his own development of a text based RPG system where he is creating randomized map generation, gear customization etc. only to realize as paint glides down my arm:

" I'M FREEKIN' OLD!!!!"

When did my brain stop absorbing like a sponge and behave more like a brick?

If writing caption for your Instagram picture is an art, then what is commit messages for your GitHub repositories.

My job pains me sometimes ...

"Issue: Maps aren't working properly."

Can anyone guess why?

I can't sleep whenever I remember ,few year before I paid $25 for ethical hacking workshop and they show us inspect element n SQL map

Last night: Wow, I just finished that massive feature and I still get some time left! Why not play something?!

Oh crap, this game is so cool but my video card drivers needs an update (AMD Radeon on a Fedora system).

The proprietary drivers don't run on this version of Xorg server... Fine, let's search for some solutions online and... Hey! Found it! Let's see: downgrade Xorg, download the driver, patch it for your kernel version...

Did I just fucked my display? Oh yeah... Let's try to fix it........

Fuck...

5am: Finally got it all working perfectly again... Fuck this game, I hate it!

The solution to missing esc key is to map it to caps lock, like we were ever using the caps lock......

Now cut the ranting, you have a solution

Map of the Internet according to xkdc.

How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
64
One that fixes the problem and doesn’t care it’s a hardware problem
60 that later states how it could have been done differently and in a more efficient way
And three that continue on the thread discussing how the light bulb is not needed as it’s possible to create a perfect map of the room and how that could be achieved

Basically every time a designer thinks they made the perfect design and that if the program works by itself that's it. No man, I still have to spend hours trying to make every element of my program map to the elements you put for me to use. Give me time!

Analog mail still works!
Stickers finally arrived! Thanks @dfox and @trogus for this amazing community !

Every month I re-evaluate the code I had written previously to compare my progress in coding standards...
Turns out I need a time machine to go back in time and slap myself

I'm building a cross platform mobile app for this sales company to manage sales of each Van Sales Representatives. The app displays details of the customers; name, address, etc...

After demo, they requested for a map inside the app, specifically on the screen that displays the customer details for easy navigation by their VSR.

All attempts to convince them to use Google maps failed :(

Fucking managers
Now I know why companies with shitty managers don’t grow

Me conversing with my senior as to how to make one of our functions scalable which around 10k devs would be using.

Manager walks in

Manager: how’s function x going

Me: great , will be done soon

Manager: you need to finish it by today

Me: can’t do it , too many sub functions need to be reconfigured( which was his job)

Manager: take *insert some managers asslicker’s name*’s help

Me: okay

We will finish it by today , but everybody know how “robust” the output will be

P.S. I didn’t argue because I’ve done that before and it’s like hitting your head on a wall. If you have read my previous rants, you would know

These are my stress balls for now... Anyone else?

"Let the design team be the design experts. Your job is to be the business expert. Ask them how their design solutions meet your business goals. If you trust your design team, and they can explain how their recommendations map to those goals, you’re fine. If you neither trust them, nor can they defend their choices it’s time to get a new design team." - Mike Monteiro

@dfox Yay for new items and desks, but I'm still not seeing my world map desk, and that should be a must. Everyone has one like that, no?

It is map of various devices connected over public IP to internet. Any interesting insights or comments that you can infer from this map?

So, my company pays thousands and thousands of euros just to show map and enable geocoding, a bug in google maps prevent Google Maps to work in Cordova and it's blocking us from deploying. After days and days of research I understand I can't solve it and I open an issue on google platform. Result: Severity -> S4, Priority -> P4

Map/filter/reduce in a tweet:

map([🌽, 🐮, 🐔], cook)
=> [🍿, 🍔, 🍳]

filter([🍿, 🍔, 🍳], isVegetarian)
=> [🍿, 🍳]

reduce([🍿, 🍳], eat)
=> 💩

I genuinely just found solution to a dev problem in an xkcd comic.

I defy anyone to come up with a geekier solution to a problem than the Peter Carre map projection.

I use spaces instead of tabs. Working beside me, my mates were irritated of that beautiful sound(they called it noise) from my keyboard.

Excited to start learning some backend for the first time while building a side project! First experience setting up a dB, map tile server, api, geocoder, etc. to make something completely self-hosted! 😊

Do we have something like devRant world map or kind of?

There are so many:
Arch Linux, Krita, LMMS, Open Street Map and many more.

Some times I like to think what would I do with my life if suddenly all electronics stopped working...

It's scary as shit, but I think I would survive. I have some other skills (wood working and construction).

Would you?

I'm working on a pretty Plotly map. To learn how to use bubble graphs, I've copy-pasted the example and modified it.
The example is ebola occurrence by year, Plague Inc style. So naturally I need to add some countries. For testing, of course.

Ebola for everyone! Yay.
I like my job.

Ok... Now the fun stuff can begin :)

Just an update : never fucking install windows 7 on a new desktop without first reading , fucking piece of shit won’t detect my SSD , tried different solution over the Internet to no success, after 3 hours of nerve wrecking debugging I read a post on the Internet that “some”(not sure which) versions of windows just don’t detect an SSD,
Finally done by installing windows 10,
But nooooooo will windows let me die in peace, noooooooo
Every fucking time I restart my PC “ windows is installing updates
I mean fuck you , how fucking many bugs do you squash in a day.

Probably some engineer at Microsoft will be “ oops o dropped a donut on my keyboard, let just press ctrl + z” to undo changes and upload , lol “

Ugggh. Has anyone else on here worked with MFC?

I've been updating some legacy software and it's been like wading through a swap that was caused by a malfunctioning trailer park septic system: no map, and mostly shit with the occasional nasty surprise.

Have you ever played Zelda: Breath of The Wild?
Have you seen this system where you set a point on the map, and see a colum of light going up from this point with the Sheikah tablet?

Man I'd love to do that in an augmented reality system on a smartphone 😍

Same as when I go gym..
Deep breaths to get calm,
focus mind on clarity & stillness
then visualize, map & draw out exactly what I'm going to do and how I'm gonna go about it.
Finally, execute.

How to kill Jira Backlog in one simple step:
1) put '-∞' to Storypoints
2) enjoy

(Bottom line: it can be fixed from User Story Map to something normal)

Toilet Dev rant - my urine went into mute mode when that creepy business head almost 7 feet stood in the urinal next to me and said hi. What the fuck from such height he can easily view the entire map of the urinals and what not. And why the fuck my urine went mute not even a single drop went through. I hate it

Today I was asked a question on JavaScript regarding the difference between normal `for` loop and a `map` function on an array with regards to closures. Can anyone help me understand? #javascript #interview

Work on a Python mapping project, get everything right except changing color of points on the map. Take a long break on that project, come back and realize I made a capitalization error 😂😂

front end developer map

Biggest sin
Due to lack of time, I named all the variables in my project without logic,
Like temp1,str1, function dojson etc

Lord be with the dev who's gonna work on that project

PS I am not a bad person, it is the time that made do such things

:-(
Firefox doesn't map correctly the controller (Xbox One) but it works on Chrome. (FF on Android Works)

This is literally the first time (for me) that something works on Chrome and not on FF. (at first shot)
usually it is the opposite.

One point for Chrome (this time)

but still 6,022*10²³ Points for FF.

I just played a few old maps I and a few steam friends made and it brought back the feelings. I had to open a few maps in hammer (Level editor) and see myself around.

I completely forgot the controls in hammer and had difficulties to recall how to import assets from a custom map. Everything was clunky.

It kind of makes me sad when I look back. I wish I could still map - but the school will start tomorrow and I guess I have no time for that. The same thing happened with playing the piano. Once I reached a certain skill level, I stopped although I loved it. I stopped progressing.

Unreal engine isn't fully my thing, I feel uncomfortable working in it, though I still want to make games. I found myself not opening it for a month or so.

We had a project with a web app and an Android app. We split it out, he took the web and I was working on Android. He was very curious to do the project with me and very motivated at the beginning. We agreed on our first module that was user authentication. After some time when I told him that first module of app is ready and asked him on his progress, (When ever we had a talk he pretend like every thing is going fluently, though I continously told him ask for help if needed ) he opened a folder in vs code containing two files "index.html" and "style.css" and showed me the "login & sign up" design he was doing for days. I have no option but to appreciate his work. On that day I created new folder on my machine "web application" and started working.

Finally , dual monitor , too bad am going on a vacation tomorrow.

Been cribbing about a single monitor since ages (1 year)

The sorting button on devRant's feed page is just Gilfoyle's tattoo twice, once upside down like Dinesh says.

Started coding HTML, CSS and JavaScript as part of my multimedia design studies. Lecturer would throw up a simple 960 page on the projector, said "make this" and left the room. Being thrown in the deep end is definitely a way to learn that taught me a lot

LIRR system rant 2 - there is a thing called a sensor. Can you please paste them on your trains so we know on a real-time map where the train is. If it's 8 miles away when supposedly 'on time' we don't have to freeze on the platform. It's 2016 not 2007.

This cat is looking at me like how my manager looks at me when I say am gonna work a few extra hours of work because I like what I do...

Am the one who gave her the milk 😅

To all those geniuses who keep a finger on my screen to show me what they wanted to be changed ,you need to remove your fucking finger first so that I can see what you are talking about. I fucking can’t see through your finger.
Worst part is when they have huge palms that cover most of the screen

I only boot into Windows for gaming and making normal map for MC texture pack, you?

So if you’re planning on going to Antarctica sometime soon, well then don’t ,

Reference: earth.nulschool.net

Today I actually used a data structure other then List or Map for a real problem!!!

This is like a once in a year, several years thing? (Technical interviews don't count)

Don't blame the teachers, they don't know the latest technologies themselves, they are mostly graduates, who have almost no work exp, so they might not know latest technologies or how to use em, neither do universities fund them to learn them
P.S. Not a teacher, just put yourself in their shoes

Data representation is one of the most important things in any kind of app you develop. The most common, classic way to do it is to create a class with all the fields you want to transport, for example User(name, lastName). It's simple and explicit, but hell no, in my current company we don't play that kindergarten bullshit, the only way we know how to do things here is full hardcore. Why would anyone write a class to represent a Song, a Playlist or an Album when you can just use a key-> value map for pretty much everything? Need a list of songs? No problem, use a List<Map<String, String>>, OBVIOUSLY each map is a song. Need a list of playlists? Use a List<List<Map<String, String>>>... Oh wait, need to treat a value as a number and all you have are strings? That's what casting is for, dumbass.

No, seriously, this company is great. I'm staying here forever!

Automate this!

I'm an aspiring coder working some chappy administrator job just to pay the bills for now. My boss found out that I may actually be more computer literate than I let on.

Boss: "I want you to make X happen automatically if I click here on this spreadsheet"

Me "X!? That means processing data from 4 different spreadsheets that aren't consistently named and scraping comparison info from the fronted of the Web cms we're using"

Boss: "if you say so.. Can you do it?"

Me: "maybe.. Can I install python?"

Boss: "No..."

Me: "what about node.js or ruby?"

Boss: "no.. I don't know what you're talking about but you're not installing anything, just get it done"

Me: "Errm Ok.."

So here I am now, way over my head loving the fact that I'm unofficially a Dev and coding my first something in Powershell and vb that will be used in business :)

Sucks that I still have to keep my regular work on target whilst doing this though!

Heads up , not a tech rant

So I now know what you should say if your kid asks what kind of person you should or should not be

So in the picture (sorry it isn’t clear , was taken late night after work) was a common parking area , the bikes parked you see are parked leaving space between at least for 2 more bikes. The owners usually park it that way cos they are too lazy to “properly park”. I confronted them last month and they said they’ll look into it , they have been contacted by various people from my area about this mattter , but it seems they don’t think it matters

So kids , learn to be considerate and not a douche bag , learn to listen and act , not act and listen , and last of all , learn to be a better person , that’s what humans have been trying to do for hundreds of years

Well i am working as an intern at this startup. Initially it was all simple crons and database. After one month one of the founder asks me to map two tables, create an api, integrate a fucking payment gateway and i am now left with a lot of work and confused state of mind.

PS: i am first year cse student

It's clearly in the contract people.
You walk a client through the entire contract and come launch they want to add pages and change layouts without paying extra because they have 24 hours to launch.
What don't you get about "you approved the site map, layouts, and designs which is what we quoted you for, contract clearly states how much per extra pages and how much to change layouts and designs after approval and work processed"

Devrant should have a "preview" image option for images uploaded on a rant. You could just end up uploading images of you and your vacuum cleaner doing some "cleaning"
@dfox

Fucking fuck !
I work with a senior Dev,
It’s pretty much like am working under him....
He’s like a great Dev no doubt about it

But !!!!

He’s a fucking dumbass when it comes to working in a team. He makes changes in my code without telling me. He says He forgot to tell me , every single time

When I ask him how a piece of code works , he says it’s pretty much obvious and acts like even a 6 year old kid Would know this ,
He doesn’t think 2 steps ahead before solving a problem usually creating another problem !

We were once working on a language which we weren’t very good at , so I suggested him to ask another Dev in our company about inputs on our code structure to which he completely Disagreed saying they really won’t know much and that he knows more than them..
Fucking dumbass thinks he knows more than most ...

I have tried confronting him multiple times but he feels but he just won’t listen...

How the fuck do Jr devs end up doing things someone specifically asks not to do.!!!!!
Fucks timelines up

So I asked my Jr Dev to leave a feature as it might not be required in this release and rather concentrate on the thing that is gonna make this release work , the “SAVE” button.
I mean how had is it to understand,
This dude goes ahead and “utilises” days on the thing that isn’t gonna be released(a dropdown) , and no, the dropdown still doesn’t work.

I understand the spirit of solving the bugs first. But what’s the point of solving it if it doesn’t fucking “save”

P.S. I’ve done this too as a Jr Dev :p

Yesterday had fogged mind all day long. I felt like the biggest r-word in the world. Couldn't even map some simple API arrays.

Tool Laterus just makes me woke AF.

Been coding hard today since I turned on the pc

public static Map<Integer, List<Integer>> stuff(arguments) {
HashMap<Integer, List<Integer>> map = new HashMap<>();
method(map, otherVariables);
return map;
}
public static void method(HashMap map, otherVariables) {
map.put(things);
}

So... You know how to return a map from a method. Then why do you create the map outside the method and make it an argument that does not get returned, making it confusing because the map gets created empty, given to a different method, then returned, making it look like you're returning an empty map...
...instead of just creating it inside the called method, returning it and assigning it to a map in the calling method? Even if you think that would create another map (it doesn't), the compiler is intelligent and can optimise that away.

When your frontend does not really get what your backend is trying to say...

This is oalley.net. Apart from the fact that their frontend and backend do not work together very well, it is a nice tool to mark reachable areas on a map based on the starting point, the means of transportation and the maximum time.

That feeling of utter uselessness when you read "Really? That took you all day?" in your gf's eyes when (proudly) showing that you finally got the map markers working reactively on map drag.

!!THE WORLD IS COMING APART!!

How in gods name did Putty manage to map a SSH tunnel to port 83306 and MySQL Workbench just didn't care and worked?!?!

And that is why I map caps lock to any f*ing thing on earth but to the caps lock.

Can anyone recommend a good free blogging site?

Was going to use wordpress but im not paying 130 AUD just to map it to a sub domain.

Blogger has very few options when it comes to themes and custom themes.

And tumblr... Is tumblr (I was using it but decided to rid myself of such filth)