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1. Start working in company that is celebrating something the same day you start new job.
2. Make sure they invite you.
3. Get drunk hard before event.
4. Puke on a CEO during his opening speech.
Mission accomplished you’re now a legend.11
I miss old internet.
- without politics
- without robots
- without money
- without big portals
- without commercials
- without advertising
- without data centers
- without ipv6
but with great usenet and community
Shit fuck I’m old27
CEO hired graphics designer without HR help after first meeting and that person first day of his work borrowed money from people and that’s not end of story.
Same guy came back at night and robbed the workplace with his friends, didn’t came back to work. Company bought couple of big iMac for new graphics department back then, all gone.
When company reported incident to Police it turned out he travel and steal from companies all over the country and they’re trying to catch him for a year.11
I see software engineering mostly devolving to be simpler syntax, more widespread and reach more range of people, including non-tech ones.
Once a while when I got brilliant idea of application in my head.
- open IDE
- write hello world
- close IDE
Month later wondering wtf was this about.2
You can believe or not but it’s just one of those stories. It’s long and crazy and it probably happened.
A few years ago I was interviewed by this big insurance company. They asked me on linkedin and were interested. They didn’t specify who they were so I didn’t specify who I am either.
After they revealed who they are I was just curious how they fuck they want to spend those billions of dollars they claimed in their press notes about this fucking digital transformation everyone is talking about. The numbers were big.
I got into 3 or 4 phone/skype interviews without technical questions and I was invited to see them by person.
I know that it would be funny because they didn’t asked me for CV so they didn’t know anything about me and I was just more curious how far I can get without revealing myself.
They canceled interview at midnight and I was in the middle of Louis de Funès comedies marathon so I didn’t sleep whole night. I assumed they would just reschedule but then they phoned me at 8 am if I can come because they made mistake.
So at first talk I was just interviewed by some manager I knowed after 5 minutes he would be shitty as fuck and demand stupid things in no time because he is not technical. He was trying to explain me that they got so great people and they do everything so fast.
From my experience speed and programming are not the things that match. ( for reference of my thought see three virtues of a GREAT programmer )
So I just pissed them off by asking what they would do with me when I finish this transformation thingy next year. ( Probably get rid off and fire at some point were my thoughts )
Then I got this technical interview on newest gold color MacBook pro - pair programming ( they were showing off how much money they have all the time ).
Really that was the thing and I was so bored and tired that I just asked in what ES standard I can code.
The problem was despite he told me I can do anything and they are using newest standards ( yeah right ) the “for of” loop didn’t worked and he even didn’t know that syntax existed. So I explained him it’s the newest syntax pointing mozilla page and that he need to adjust his configuration. Because we didn’t have time for that I just did it using var an function by writing bunch of code.
When he was asking me if I want to write some tests probably because my code looked ugly as fuck ( I didn’t sleep for more then 24 hours at that point and wanted to live the building as fast as I can) I told I finished and there is no time for tests because it’s so simple and dumb task. The code worked.
After showing me how awesome their office is ( yeah please I work from home so I don’t care ) I got into the talk with VP of engineering and he was the only person who asked me where is my CV because he didn’t know what to talk about. I just laughed at him and told him that I got here just by talking how awesome I am so we can talk about whatever he wants.
After quick talk about 4 different problems where I introduced 4 different languages and bunch of libraries just because I can and I worked with those he was mine.
He told me about this awesome stack they’re building with kubernetes and micro services and the shitty future where they want to put IOT into peoples ass to sell them insurance and suddenly I got awake and started to want that job but behind that all awesomeness there was just .NET bridge with stack of mainframes running COBOL that they want to get rid off and move company to the cloud.
They needed mostly people who would dump code to different technology stack and get rid of old stack ( and probably those old people ) and I was bored again because I work more in r&d field where you sometimes need to think about something that don’t exist and be creative.
I asked him why it would take so much time so he explained me how they would do the transformation by consolidating bunch of companies and how much money they would make by probably firing people that don’t know about it to this day.
I didn’t met any person working permanently there but only consultants from corporations and people hired in some 3rd party company created by this mother company.
They didn’t responded with any decision after me wasting so much time and they asked me for interview for another position year after.
I just explained HR person how they treat people and I don’t want to work there for any money.
If You reached this point it is the end and if it was entertaining thank YOU I did my best.
Have a nice day.5
Fuck old farts trying to enslave us by censoring internet,
fuck cloud services,
fuck city surveillance,
fuck internet surveillance,
fuck RFID that enslaved animals,
fuck IoT constantly looking at our life,
fuck artificial intelligence.
It’s becoming fucking nightmare.
Time to make tools to fight against technology and people that intrude our life with this shit.
Where the fuck is John Connor ?9
Life is mostly about waiting.
Waiting for code to compile.
Waiting for payment confirmation.
Waiting for food.
Waiting for gas to fill up tank.
Waiting for lights to go green.
Waiting for beer.
Waiting for waiter.
Waiting for call.
Waiting for school to finish or start.
Waiting for exam.
Waiting for job.
Waiting for application to start.
Waiting inside prison.
Waiting inside workplace.
Waiting for summer or winter.
Waiting for movie to start.
Waiting for girl to dress up.
Waiting for birthday.
Waiting for birth.
Waiting for death.
Fucking timers everywhere.
Someone got big sense of humor when developing this world.7
Yes I believe you’re Google and I will click that link.
I don’t care that IP from that you sent it to me is from some company in India.
Probably Google outsourced it’s email service there.
But wait why is this link pointing to Chinese website?
Ouch you provided some ip under A dns record so let me nmap it...
So there’s bunch of services you have there.
ftp, ssh, msrpc, netbios-ssn, snpp, microsoft-ds, sun-answerbook ...wait what ?
Let me curl that 8888 port.
Oh you have login / password form and it’s pagoda linux panel.
Wait a second I will read about it maybe some default login / password will work...
Ok so maybe I just make a script to brute force it as you wanted to brute force my computer motherfucker.2
my job offer reply rant from today >>>>
thanks for the offer but reading from job description your solutions look obsolete, old and complete mess to me.
I am mainly focused on modern open source, flexible technology stack and this job would not be a challenge I am looking for.
<<<< end of story1
I started early in my childhood days, nobody had cellphone or internet here, my phone number was 3 digits long and my home country started to recover from 44 years of communism.
My first dev project was probably to copy game from newspaper to Atari 1300XE
Article listing was around 10 pages long and if you made mistake program didn’t run.
It took me a while I can’t remember how long but probably whole day and I was finally able to play it.
I don’t remember what was game about but later on I learned some BASIC from book and was able to color the screen and stuff like that.
I was about 6 years old.
I also remember that Atari computer had tape recorder where you put cassette to load game.
Some more complicated games were loading more then hour and you need to walk very carefully around or your walk can cause error and operation would fail.
Besides that there were national radio auditions about Atari where at the end they played code sound wave so you can record it on your cassette and then play software from radio on your Atari.
I never managed to do it cause I was living near military airport and pilots were practicing landing and starting above my home causing radio signal noise and breaking my software recoding.
I can probably say that highly accelerating plane could cause game loading problem and it’s not a joke.11
Jingle fuck, jingle fuck,
Jingle fuck away.
Oh what fun it is to hear
silence on the Christmas day.3
2010: Thick native clients are the worst, thin clients only. JS is the future!
2014: Thin client dev is hard across devices, native thick clients is the future! Swift all the things
2017: React native, hold my beer4
Actually the worst fucking developer experience is meeting those all knowing people who think they know everything but actually they even don’t know how the fucking tools they’re using every day are written and how they work.
Those people that think when they installed library it should do everything how they imagined to and don’t fucking bother to debug problems and create pull requests if it’s fucking buggy.
Those fucking ranters who moan about something they don’t understand.
Those fuckers who think if they understood what A*, Dijkstra, graph algorithm is they’re smarter then others.
No you fuckers you’re dumb as fuck cause instead of explaining it to someone you just blame people for not knowing “obvious shit”.
All those fucking ignorants I am fucking writing about you.
You either start support each other or fuck you people.7
So I opened crunchbase newsletter like always to see what interesting is happening in IT.
Looks like app that allow people to send REST calls got investment of 50M.
The moment when you realize that simple UX and sending REST calls using desktop app can make you millions of dollars.
And I am tired again.9
I am interviewing people for a job position with python knowledge.
My first question is how to reverse string and second one what’s the difference between set and list.
So far no one knows.
Fairly speaking I am asking only basic questions about what is decorator, generator, lambda. Also some basic data structure questions.
Is it to hard ?
I lost my faith in humanity.15
Trying to learn some golang after a break.
Made http / https transparent proxy for personal project.
Mind: You need to add configuration file with domains you allow traffic and block everything else using list of regex.
Me: Ok I can do it, 4 hours later ok done
Mind: Why not make it differently by making list of url you can block and test this shit on fucking ads and stop using adblock that downloads content.
Me: ok that will be handy I can watch websites faster and drop traffic I don’t want to.
Funny fact, it works I broke analytics, logging, quantum shit fucks and even youtube plays ok.
Go is awesome for networking stuff lol.12
I am being mentored all of my life.
Parents mentored me that I won’t get to that school and I should pick other one ( I got there where I wanted ).
Politicians mentor me to make me happier by taking more and more of money I earned ( I am not ).
Advertisers mentor me to buy their products cause those are best products in the world ( I buy cheaper versions produced in same factories by same people ).
My boss ( when I got one ) mentored me that everything is simple and could be done in 5 minutes. ( after reading some dummy article )
Coworkers are mentoring me everyday that it’s not their fault ( It definitely is ).
Telemarketers, emails, sms messages are mentoring me about my future, don’t miss that occasion, it’s best for your life ( No it’s not )
Celebrities are mentoring me how to live my life to become a successful person ( Yeah right, cause they known how to become one right after they were born ).
Now I see I am starting living in times where computer will start mentoring me how to live my life. ( Sometimes it already is )
What’s left is doctors start mentoring me about my illnesses and children ( if I ever have one ) mentoring me about how dumb I am.
Then I can finally peacefully die and don’t come back to this mentoring hell.9
Drinking good whiskey, listening to Chopin and birds singing, looking at moon.
I can do it for the rest of my life.4
Whenever something goes mainstream and becomes buzzword there are annoying consequences of it.
First, it’s harder to find anything meaningful about the topic.
Second, suddenly everyone is an expert and web search starts to show not related products like promo codes, stupid videos, tutorials for dumb.
Third, old content that was interesting is lost under pile of shit or gets deleted.
I feel like I’m living in middle ages and before I try to watch something interesting it’s deleted by Spanish inquisition and replaced by some crap.
Most of expert content I have in favorites is returning 404 and youtube videos are deleted or private so from some time I started to backup all content I read or watch and find interesting in public networks.
Fortunately I have couple of terabytes of storage to backup interesting topics but I’m not happy that I’m back to times when I was saving internet page to floppy disk to show it to my friend later.
What a fucking nightmare.3
I know you folks in Europe and elsewhere in the world probably take this sort of thing for granted, but it is really unusual here in the US. When our daughter is born next month, I will be entitled to 12 weeks of paid leave, which my boss (great guy, btw) has encouraged me to take fully.
My concern is that I have projects, and twelve weeks is enough time that they would probably die on the vine, even if/when I hand them off to someone else.
It's stressful, and I need a way to deal with it.7
Looking for variables and methods in inheritance chain is like walking in Thailand and looking for a girl hooker on a street full of ladyboys.
You can find one but you never know.9
I rewrote my static website generation from jekyll to custom python code over single night.
Literally all jekyll plugins I use including seo, rss, syntax highlighting inside markdown content, sitemap, social plugins, css sass, all of it.
Now it’s around 400 lines of python code that I understand completely. I didn’t touch any existing templates and after comparing output I got even better results now and it’s working faster.
I skipped drafts as I don’t need them now.
Why ? Cause now I can make better generator for my side projects that can include some partial website generation, better modification and date handling, tree structure, etc.
What I will do now is that I will parse bunch of content to create markdown files that will be sucked by this generator to create static web pages that will flood internet lol.
Still I didn’t believe it was possible to rewrite all of it so quickly. I sit yesterday around 4pm and finished around 6am.
I started thinking that maybe I am crazy and no one can help me.9
Tried a mobile app club this semester and the second meeting they brought in these two business majors who said they had an idea for an app that would share videos of college parties and the videos would disappear after 24 hours. You could also invite people to the parties as well.
I was like so you basically want snapchat... what happens when cops create accounts and fine people for under age drinking? How will you get market share over snapchat or vine? How much money are you offering?
They were not pleased...3
1) HTML turing complete
2) Kardashian programming language
3) EU resolution that forbids accepting and merging pull requests without court order.
Because why not.2
Junior devs PR -
line 98: Catches FileNotFoundException.
line 99: Immediately throws FileNotFoundException
CHANGE REQUESTED 🤦🏻♂️1
Similar to other countries if you work in international projects and companies.
If you work for big government related / small domestic company projects you can meet with comments and variables named in native language instead of english.
Just because there are probably only 2-3 companies who win every government project, they take all money and pay shit to developers.
To meet requirements they mostly hire fresh graduates to do the job.
CEO of one of those most famous quote is: You can replace every developer with finite number of students.2
About week ago I finally upgraded to ios 12 and I really like screen time reporting. It forces me to spend less time using phone.
It lacks features like listening to music or books time, probably because it only measure screen time. Besides that it’s cool.13
After three weeks looking for decent pdf parser that will handle all documents I gathered for my project I decided to write my own.
All those I tried end up with more then 10% not correctly parsed pdfs or require to much coding.
I was sceptic so I waited another week debating if it’s good idea to do it and I said yes.
Spent 16 hours straight coding pdf document extraction library and command line tool based on pdf.js
Fuck, now when I open pdf I see opcodes instead of text.
Got two more hours until client planning meeting and then I go to sleep for a while.
Time to start testing this more deeply as I have about 60k ~ 20GB pdf documents to parse and then I need to build some dependency graph out of its text.
At least it’s more funny then making boring REST API for money.4
can we actually 3d scan all found human ancestor bones and draw bone structure changes over years ?
gene testing companies could show this animation over their websites.16
How ethical it is to send 1gb email with big picture with word “NO” in response to spam email that wants my agreement ?17
It was probably Microsoft Excel as part of backend infrastructure inside financial institution.
As far as I remember there was some spreads configuration and price feeder inside excel.1
Wondering if I got enough time left in my life just to hear this one:
Using your legs for transportation? That’s so old school.2
Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucking Friday bug.
Shitty bug just hit fan.
Today I start teaching my friend programming. I think I will skip useless shit and just learn him how to google and copy paste from stack overflow.3
If can pick one it probably will be Fabrice Bellard.
Anyway everyone who contribute to open source community deserves to be famous.
Restored from my backup. My home town 2004 setup, floppy disk drives, sound blaster audio card, dial up us robotics modem, nokia 3310 on the chair, lg hifi with cassette tape and cd, unitra amplifier, equalizer and sound columns. Panorama made using olympus c-720 uz.
Funny times ^^
high res image
Finished side project last month. It was hell of a ride, about 300-350 hours of programming and solving problems per month for over half a year, including my regular remote job.
Side project was 1 hour commute time from my house.
There were days where I was working over 16 hours per day.
During this roller coaster I also changed my diet to keto and lost about 12kg / 26 lbs.
Kept my regular remote job where I am the only backend developer.
Donated to eff.
Started listen to audiobooks and exercise to keep my mind clear and focused.
Finally I discovered devrant.
It was all crazy shit and I feel happy I did it because now 5 days after I finished this side project I started to think that my life is not so fucked up I thought it is. This gave me my confidence back.
Now it’s time to rest before some new crazy shit would hit my life.
I was flash developer once, it was great when macromedia was around, then adobe acquired them, now flash is gone.
Years are passing and most of industry is the same as always. Trying to drag you into this rat race of learning new amazing technologies, amazing projects that are actually doing same job as 50 years ago but using more memory and cpu cycles. Because all has it’s roots in algorithms from previous centuries.
So youngsters loose your best life time, be innovative by doing nothing more then copy paste from stackoverflow and duck typing shitty code.
Be a slave and sit in the amazing office, that has everything but not your real life that meanwhile is sucked by corporate squeezer till your last breath.
Be piece of shit that can be kicked around.
Watch youtube, facebook, instagram or whatever social network that shows you pictures that are fooling your mind that you’re someone special and you need this stuff.
Then be ready to suck some dicks to earn money and buy stuff you don’t need, live where you don’t want and do what you don’t like. You piece of shit.
Well that’s what disappoints me from my tech stack.
Now chill out, turn off your electronic gadgets, go out and enjoy real world.2
I got so wasted yesterday and met person from Italy who was traveling from Bologna to Milan with stop in Warsaw because it was cheaper.
I checked today and it’s actually cheaper to travel inside Italy when switching plane in other countries.5
Made parsers that are downloading and parsing 100 years of law data right now.
I am so happy I don’t have to read every document and just let computer do it for me.
That are great times we live in.2
I run update without where on mysql console on production database Today.
Just because I needed to fix database after bug fix on the backend of the application.
I thought I wrote good sql statement after executing it on my local machine and then everything got bad.
Luckily it was only one column with some cached statistics data and I checked that it was not important data before I actually started fixing stuff but still ...
Almost got hard attack afterwards.
Made a script to fix this column and it took me only 15 minutes but still...
Bug was caused in part I got no unit tests and application grow after 3 years of development from simple one for one customer and volumes of documents around 50k to over 40 customers and volumes over 2mil per month, don’t know how many pages each, just in one year after we completed all needed features.
I have daily backups and logs of every api operation but still.
I think this got to far for one backend developer.
I got scared that I will loose money cause I am contractor and the only backend developer working on it.
I am so tired of this right now I think I need a break from work.
Responsibility is killing me so hard right now.
It will take a week to get back to normal.3
Apple corp. (Apple) founded in London in January 1968 by the members of the Beatles.
So Apple name is also stolen 😂6
Best career decision:
Doing many different jobs before programming, move to capital city to pursue first software development job without money, college degree, place to stay and plans for future.
Worst career choice:
Probably would be staying in Poland despite many opportunities to travel around the world, earn big money or work on really cool things as software developer but I won’t know until I die.2
Reading book about sapiens history. It turned out we are slaved by wheat. Fucking plant conquered this world using humans as a tool. Fuck You wheat then, burn in hell.8
This boring story with stupid ending started on Monday with me going out to buy some food and cook something delicious, day like always until my mind went nuts.
I work from home and cook my meals by myself cause I love cooking.
To buy ingredients I go shopping couple times a week always making the same steps, doing this for over a year now and by this time everything was automatic so I could think about work problems and solutions.
I start usually by getting up from my desk around noon, not many people doing shopping at that time and I can proceed quick.
Algorithm is like this: go to kitchen and look at the fridge, go out, wait for traffic lights, take tram, ride two stops, wait for the traffic lights again, go to supermarket, do shopping and finally go back the same way. Boooring.
When I get out from tram that day l looked at traffic lights to go green, as always and that’s the place where everything started to go bad.
So I was waiting there doing nothing and then stupid idea got me.
I figured out I can stop looking at light to make this day different and look ahead.
Then simply start walking when people from other side start walking.
It worked smoothly on those lights and I was happy I can do things differently from now on. I proceed with this idea on the way back and motherfuckers started walking on red. Twice !!!!
Since then three times some car was driving on green near me in those places and people started walking on red.
It got me worried about world determinism instantly. I might increased some entropy to much and some world developer changed some line of code while I was shopping and from that time death is passing by me.
Now it got me to the point where the more I follow this way the more I am worried about my life. Started thinking about ordering ingredients online.
So if you read this you know that I know your plan and I will be changing supermarkets and paths to it randomly starting from next week.
Or not I hope nobody hacked my mind and only thing that read and write to it is my consciousness.
I feel relief now.2
Fucking regulations, can’t play with twilio api.
Waiting for verification of my identity to make a fucking test call to myself.
Wanted to make a proof of concept during weekend, but won’t happen cause some fucking policies.
Fuck you government pigs.
Probably need to wait to fucking Monday. I will forget what I wanted to do till that time.
We are making your life easier all the time in the news, yeah right eat those popups motherfuckers.
Next regulation - government code reviews before push to master and programmer certification, for sure those fuckers are able to do it.
Really considering emigration from Europe right now.
No fucking point to start a business on this continent.
More fucking law please so we would need a lawyer before wiping ass.
Need to watch that southpark episode about security toilet checkout once again.2
Nothing ruins my day like having to touch up python scripts. I'm predominantly a Java dev and never learned Python properly so every time I do it its THE WORST3
Microbiology, biochemistry, genetics.
Mostly reading some articles, parsing some ATGC, trying to understand topic from books.6
Developer vs non developer interview:
How well do you know excel ?
How would you write spreadsheet app, what if it was cross platforms mobile application but also desktop app ?
Do you know how to use windows?
Do you know kubernetes, distributed systems, lambdas, cloud services and how to deploy to server farm ?
You know how to use printer / fax and coffee machine ?
Do you have experience in writing code for embedded devices ?
Do you know powerpoint ?
React native and native apps maybe ?5
It was in old days when I was working in java and windows systems.
Java and different log4j versions across dependencies caused system not working only on production server.
Turned out some of libraries got log4j embedded and conflicted with other log4j.
It worked in all computers except production one.
Actually that was my main reason to switch my career to python after that dependency hell.
Another one was windows server 2008 tcp connection limit set to 200 or something.
We needed to change registry to get our servers working. After this case we finally managed to convince people to switch to linux.
Anyway any non standard error when you got multiple layers communicate with each other is hard, practice make it easier to solve those problems as your success moment comes faster.4
1. power - ability to decide about other people future
2. religion - ability to promise life after death
3. entertainment - ability to make people feel something
4. money - ability to enslave people
power + religion + entertainment + money = life
Probably I got no life.7
sophisticated spam >>>
My name is Susan W. Alphonsus, I am a US military Soldier currently in Iraq. I have an important information to share with you, If i receive your response ,i will give you details of the information.5
Looks like whole world is not giving a fuck about work, recently.
Source GII - global innovation index.7
Fucking hours counting systems.
One of the hardest part of consulting job is to put hours into fucking table.
One of those solutions is so smart that when I make mistake I need to call manager to unlock the input.
My friend from work compared it to playing saper.
Some of those systems work only in IE.
Some of those run java inside browser.
Some I need to be in company domain others I need to logout from company domain.
I see the amazing articles about those amazing software solutions, still opening IE and running java to put digit into text input or pick number from select.
cvs checkout coding-all-nighter
Playing PacMan and Mario
Aaaand it’s morning.3
I am already tired before even looking at this code.
Looking at your code makes me cry.
I can insult myself whole day but it won’t be enough to survive looking at your coding style.
If cpu could talk it would ask for heater removal because your code depresses it so much.
Looking at your code makes my monitor burn out.
Downloading your code makes my hard drive stop.
And my favorite:
You’re already good developer so now stop writing and appoint as manager / tester.
What is the probability of alien rootkit signal that would be intercepted by satellite and then executed on modern computers to create AGI that can use cloud computing and digital currency to take over our world ?
From my perspective pretty high 🤣🤣🤣
Let’s convince some government people and create intergalactic cyber attack defense institution, that would keep earth safe from alien invasion, with high money grants so we can prevent those threats.
Maybe Ernest Cline Armada is already a thing.
What you think ?2
Winter is coming so I got that stupid idea just now.
Let’s make and wear big winter hats with road signs on it to see how self driving cars would react to this 🤣🤣🤣8
Change one thing a day, stick with plan, do one thing at a time and be consistent and after 356 days or less you would have a product.
Definitely project life on this planet.
Being optimist helps a lot but I still have no clear answer who send me here.2
I tried to watch netflix ‘13 Reasons Why’ series after reading article about ‘scientists found a 13.3 percent increase in teenagers’ deaths from suicide”
I started scrolling trough the show after second episode cause it was so boring and predictable.
Maybe I’m just to old or maybe don’t understand USA school system or maybe I watched way to many typical movies about how the ‘popular group of teenagers’ make other teenagers life a nightmare ( Including scary movie and Venezuelan telenovelas ).
Can anybody who got interested into the show write why it is so cool or depressing ?11
Installed centos 7, docker, standalone kubernetes on dev machine in 20 minutes.
Spend 8 hours starting fucking dashboard service, still no fucking luck, no fucking logs, nothing.
Fucking pending states without fucking explanation.
All the fucking pods are running fine except one fucking dashboard. I want to see the fucking dashboard.
Fucking shit fuck.
Probably as always if I clean the machine and reinstall everything it would start normally, without fucking problem.
Debugging fucking containers is so much pain in the ass, fuck.
I think it’s enough for today.2
Changing jobs is like opening new box full of candy. Everybody likes candy but not everyone likes every kind of candy.
I love classic cars because of their simplicity.
I don’t want to remove dozens parts, need computer or call support to fix simple car problem.
Mechanical solutions were good and reliable in some of the old cars so we can still renovate them and use them after 50-60 years, we won’t be able to do it with modern cars so we are in fact producing lots of waste.
Today’s car companies are ripping off their customers by providing overcomplicated solutions that prevent customers to repair a car on their own.
And don’t let me start about proprietary car software and protocols.
That’s a big world problem right now.
Anyone got some decent book or scientific papers to read about how looking at phone screens affect human brain ? Might be also about watching tv because I don’t see the difference, despite the size of the screen.
It’s cause I started to think that either me or everyone around is complete idiot.1
World look so empty right now so I don’t know if whole nature disappeared because of human population growth or animals are hiding some master plan to kill us. Anyway I have a feeling we crossed a border at some point and this game is over.1
Today’s text chat:
Me walking near the river in the middle of nowhere with a cellphone.
- I need image from test server. Can you provide me that image ? I need it for my local environment to fix something ( writes details of how to get an image ).
- Can’t you go to test server website and get it by yourself ?
- But this image is on canvas element.
- Because frontend is drawing in on canvas so go to network tab and get the url.
- Ah yes I can do that
I have such small talks all the fucking time. They accumulate when I go out to chill during the day.1
I talked to the client how functionality should look like on UI, draw a mockup, designed and made changes to db schema, created REST api, made documentation how to use it, told frontend developer to make changes on frontend application according to the documentation and mockups. Still no one have fucking clue how to do it. Fucking testers can’t write anything, only clicking.
So I sent curl code how the fucking request should look like exactly then resolved bugs they reported as won’t fucking fix because I will not be also making fucking frontend. Probably they even don’t know what curl is. What a fucking fuck.
And that’s what I am mostly doing from Monday till Friday to keep this project going.
It’s cause client are nice guys and we are doing something good, not some fucking ai, blockchain, big data, financial scam everyone is wanking around.
And friends are asking, why I drink.
The power of scrolling keep amazing me it’s not about fucking content, not about what fiends shared or about interesting shit, it’s about infinite scroll motherfuckers, people are simple as fuck.6
This shit is long story of my computer experience over my lifetime.
When I was young I got my first PC with windows it was not so bad. It required safe shut down of it’s fat32 partition. From time to time I needed to reinstall it cause of slow down but I got used to it I was only a gamer.
Time passes and I got more curious about computers and about this linux. Everything worked there but installation of anything was complete madness and none of windows programs worked well, and I wanted to play games and be productive so I sticked with windows.
I bought hp laptop once with nvidia card, it was overheating and got broken. So I bought toshiba and all I told to the seller was I want ATI card. Took me 5 minutes to do it and I was faster then my friend buying pack of cigarettes because I was earning money using computer.
Then I grown up running my small one person programming businesses and I wanted to run and compile every fucking program on this world. I wanted linux shell commands. I wanted package manager, and I wanted my os to be simple because I wasn’t earning money by using my os but by programming. So after getting my paycheck I bought mac. I can run windows and linux on vm if I need it. I try not to steal someones work so I didn’t want to run hackintosh. I am using this mac for some time.
Also I use playstation for gaming. Because I only want to run and play game I am not excited about graphics but gameplay. I think I am pragmatic person.
I can tell you something about my mac.
When I close lid it go sleep when I open it wakes up instantly. I never need to wonder if I want to hibernate or shut down or sleep and drain battery. It is fucking simple.
When I want to run or open something it doesn’t want me to wait but it gives me my intellij or terminal or another browser or whatever I search for. Yeah search is something that works.
Despite it got 8 gigs of ram I can run whatever number of programs I want at the same speed. The speed is not very fast sometimes but it’s constant fast.
I have a keychain so my passwords are in one place I can slow down shared internet speed, I can put my wifi in monitor mode and I don’t need to install some 3rd party software.
And now I updated my mac to high sierra, cause it’s free and I want to play with ios compilation. Before I did it I didn’t even backup whole work. I just used time machine and regular backups. And guess what, it still works at the same speed and all I did was click to run update and cook something to eat.
When I got bored I close the lid, when got idea open lid and code shit, not waiting for fucking wakeup or fucking updates.
I wanted to rant apple products I use but they work, they got fucking updates all along at the same time. And all of updates are optional.
I cannot tell that about all apple products but about products I use.
I think I just got old and started to praise my limited time on this world. Not being excited about new crap. When I buy something I choose wisely. I bought iPhone. I can buy latest iPhone x but I bought iPhone 7 cause it’s from fucking metal. And I know that metal is harder then glass, why the fucking apple forgot about it? I don’t know.
I know that I am clumsy and drop stuff. Dropped my phone at least 100 times and nothing.
I am not a apple fan boy I won’t buy mac with this glowing shit above keyboard that would got me blind at night.
I buy something when I know that it can save my time on this world. I try to buy things that make me productive and don’t break after a year.
So now piece of advise, stop wasting your time, buy and update wisely, wait a week or a month or a year when more people buy shit and buy what’s not broken. And if something’s broken rant this shit so next customer can be smarter.
I feel I need to write some side project summary somewhere.
So here it is about 3 months later:
- deleted 90% of code I created during last 3 months
- rewrote backed 5 times
- 200 lines POC still waiting to put in any meaningful architecture on frontend
- frontend part after aurelia, next, gatsby, react I think it would be vue powered by nuxtjs
- forced myself to buy food for whole week and don’t go out (except go running ) before I finish at least what I wrote on whiteboard
Now some positive news:
- there is not much left to be fucked up, removed or unnecessary added
- I think I got a plan
- this is probably first side project that makes me happy for such long time
- there is some probability it would help people and this is what I want to do in my life
Most important is that I know it would take at least half a year to do basic version of it and I don’t care.
Wish me luck so I can put some sneak peak after next 3 months.
Fucking dust, why there is still no fucking nanotechnology that stop dust for sticking to the furniture.8
The more I live on this world the more I believe human genome was send by someone to destroy this planet because they want to build intergalactic spa for giants with lots of sand and large pool.1
Today at work I started doing 1 month old task with production problem.
First of all why now ?
Because I already fixed all the other urgent production problems I had during last month, done about 4 deployments of those super urgent errors.
Now I can start with not trivial one that are pending for quite time.
I am the only backend developer in this project ...
This is a dtp application and the problem is that we are not verifying if we got all fonts embedded in customer provided pdf files.
We are generating high quality images of those pdf for printing just fine from the beginning but now we need valid PDF with all fonts embedded in it. ( don’t ask me why I am only a hammer in this process )
After running simple test using python script against database it turned out we have over 500 broken PDF files without fonts.
So I guess I have just one sentence to say about it.
Fuck you PDF format for not being strict and allowing this shit.
I just woke up and on my computer screen there’s big announcement.
Github launching code package registry beta program.
Available repositories: npm, gem, mvn, docker, nuget.1
I was so tired of work last week and weather was so good I ended up in a bar.
People were so nice there so I got there second day in a row.
I met new nice people and cute female bartender who laughed from my jokes.
Was to drunk and tried so much to make her laugh that l forgot to get her number.
Got there next day asked bartender for her shifts, turned out it was last day of her work, she moved out from city for at least a year. So I got drunk again, and so on 5 days in a row.
Well that’s my life. Lucky me... again.
Karma is so funny I can’t laugh for some time anymore.
AWS summit, speakers talking about technologies that amazon didn’t build but they provide on its cloud.
All about how it’s awesome to use those technologies on its cloud infrastructure.
Feeling like I’m on some bad advertising summit.
I heard docker, containers like 100s times already.
On one of the slides they claim that 85% of tensorflow workloads are on their cloud.
That’s powerful statement.
Looks like enterprises are all on the way to Oracle 2.0 called AWS.5
Next personal fail ...
Turned out that wavenet is sequential so it needs previous step to predict next.
Quite obvious when you look at how people speak sentences, they hardly stop in the middle of the word.
need to think how to proceed next, how to cut sentences.
Watched deepvoice3 and some accent models from baidu.
I can generate 8 sentences at a time, each takes 8 minutes so if I cut between words and got last mels between words right I can get 1 minute but I need to store model somewhere.
I forgot my machine learning and speech synthesis skills from previous life, time to load more skills ...
I see lots of script kiddies these days that call themselves software developers or hackers. Their shitty code is flooding the world, so write more code you fuckers and let the world burn2
Me vs Myself
I lack of consistency in my life.
Except job, I work on single project for more then four years now.
Besides that I struggle so much to finish things I started or do one thing everyday or even every week for more then one month.
Trying to improve myself but it’s so hard and I don’t know when and how I lost this whole consistency I had that made me good self thought developer. Some people said best they’ve seen but I think I have a lot to learn.
It’s not that I don’t want to continue doing things I started previous day but my narrative self is harassing me so much that I don’t have vital power left.
Whenever I try to fight back it makes me weak and I can’t get up from bed so I lay and wait.
Sometimes I lay whole day and just wait.
When I do nothing my narrative inner voice find me instantly 100 other interesting things to do that make me excited, like:
- let’s check mail - oh new <picks technology> framework let’s try it,
- let’s check news
- let’s see how much <picks something> cost because you want it, buy this thing or you’re gonna die
- go out with this <picks a girl> or you’re gonna die alone
- hey <picks something> is cool let’s see how it works
- hey this <picks some problem> is cooler then the one you’re working on,
- how about to call <picks someone>
- how about go out it’s nice outside
- let’s cook this thing today you need to go to grocery
I don’t know how I figured out I need do nothing and wait to fight myself and do what I started not what my narrative voice want me but I see whole slightly improving now and doing nothing helps a lot.
It makes me focus on things I really want to do not things that are just waste of time.
Anyway thanks if anyone got to the end of this stupid story.
Have a nice day. Keep dreaming.
I just wanted to transfer my domain from domain operator dns to other dns provider.
Now I lost control over my domain and it redirects to those fuckers website.
I thought fuck them, this is their last fuck up so decided to transfer domains from this piece of shit provider to any other.
It turned out you need to send request using post office or visit their office by yourself to get EEC (authinfo) code
Their office is 300km away but cause it’s fucking faster and more reliable then waiting a month for their mail with fucking numbers I will go and do it next week.
Let the fucking hell begin.
I hope those motherfuckers would food poison and shit themselves into their beds till end of their fucking life.
Fuck those fuckers.8
Diarrhea and hangover.
I thought about it a little more and unexpected police intervention when you just received new container full of coke for your premium clients can be as much disturbing.4
I am unable to see anything useful in current social networks. It all looks like big advertising platforms and I am not interested in looking on ads. This personalization is so shitty that original content is very hard to find. All is so political correct and trendy and what about uniqueness of human individuals. Shitty socialists networks. Hope this website would not be another one.5
Bought fucking nvidia gpu to test speed of some fucking machine learning models that generate speech.
6 hours wasted already for installing fucking dependencies
cuda, fucking tensorflow gpu, bezel and other shit
Fucking resetting password to download deb with cudnn,
really ??????? fucking emails are not delivered to my fucking mailbox
After mass click of send email and multiple account ban and unban I figured out I should login to nvidia website and then allow access to fucking developer every time I want to log in there - fuck shit
Uninstalling everything now looking for fucking compatible versions between software.
10 years in this business still fucking installation of dependencies is most difficult part
Fucking corporate business and their shitty installation instructions to fuck up peoples lives and switch them to the cloud.
Same was with fucking kubernetes
Fucking software dependency hell
It’s worse then ever before.
Side job - some consulting.
Visited three book stores today.
Most books about software development on shelves were about :
Many motivational books ( almost half ) about how to become software developer just because “it’s a dream job” without any interesting content.
Less books about c/c++, networking.
Microsoft is still present with certification and windows and I didn’t saw any linux book.
So pretty much the same as it is now.6
After github next potential targets are jetbrains and slack so they are done with all competition for next 2-5 years. We can’t beat them but we can always buy them.2
What a fucking day.
Half a day looking for functionality on github that was lost in some branch and not merged to master. All remotes was pruned. Finally restored it from some remote on production and merged to master before Saturday release. Yeah !!!!
Month saved fuckers, pick some more hardcore shit to surprise me. To strong to fail.
Government sending me advertisements of some fucking foundation offering payment terminal offers.
Living the times where even own country tries to fuck you using your tax money.
Doing projects on your own from idea to base prototype you can give to users without chance of success is more like fighting with your own then development.
I rewrote application third time and I think (again) that I am on good track to finish this shit. Backend is 50% done. Started doing frontend in react now so wish me luck.
At this point of my side project I wanted to check out openresty for dynamic proxy creation in nginx.
Happy to check it out I installed centos 7 as guest using new command I just learned virt-builder that would automate vm creation.
Spend 10 hours debugging why I can ping and ssh but cannot get to application port from any network.
Checked iptables, restarted network, reinstalled vm again 3 times with different methods.
Scrolled trough whole internet and it’s mostly outdated problems.
Learned bunch of new commands without new results.
Results were always the same:
No route to host.
Turned out firewalld is fucking thing now.
systemctl firewalld stop helped
Now I know that systemd would kill me at some point for sure.
What I can add at this point ?
Please add more distros, differences, standards and programming languages so world definitely would be better place.
I need a short break now to actually start making shit that I wanted to start at 4-5pm on Saturday.
It’s Sunday 3:30am and time for breakfast.
At least I am happy it started working.2
Anyone know private/encrypted p2p network drive app (best would be opensource) between devices in the internet, with multiple user support, invite only ?
It should work behind nat so need use some 3rd party hole punching server for handshakes.
Let’s say I got a movie I want to share with my friend but instead of him downloading it, I would stream it directly from my device and my friend would open it using ex vlc.
Same with other files, on computer can be mounted as network drive.
Or small app with drag drop or cli to add / remove shared directories.
Can be raspberry pi device.
Thinking more, it should work like vpn network but with tunnels between computers.
Can it be done using ipfs ?1
I only assembled it from prusa parts but still it was lots of fun, learned a lot about how 3d printers work.
Then it was printing trex using 3d printer and it was funny to because it took me about a month to do so just because of amount of parts and the problem with parts that were broken and needed to be fixed.
From software projects, once I build a browser plugin in 2-3 hours cause I was pissed off with those shitty popups all around. I published it on browser store, made code opensource and forgot about it.
Recently I got some survey from a german university about it and I was like wtf ?
I looked at a statistics and my plugin had about 500 daily users and I was amused because the ui is shitty as fuck and the ux is even more shitty.
I plan to update this plugin but since I am focused on a bigger personal project for almost half a year now I have no time to do it.5
I got two phone numbers, first is prepaid registered for me, second is on some shitty plan registered on my company.
Today I am trying to merge those two numbers to be company numbers and first one should be main number.
Have been in telco company office twice already.
2,5 hours and still no success.
Now I got back home and waiting for phone call from consultant because some software is not working and he can’t do anything right now.
I got used to fact that the bigger company the more shitty software it have and nothing is working as expected but it is happening to me every time I try to improve my life and make it simpler.
Fax was more reliable then todays software.
I miss paper and analog way of doing business.2
Google are giving t-shirts with certificates now lol. Maybe they need to start adding phones to attract people to their data centers.3
So apple watch ecg would be fda approved ?
They took the most percentage organ failure and made device that helps monitor that and get why question.
Self promotion :
By the way I predicted that they would go after medical devices year ago.
I reminded myself I got supporter stickers and stripe from fsfe.
I placed one on my laptop and spotted that those stickers are reflecting mirrors.
Spent next hour trying to make recursive reflection photo.
It’s damn hard to place it correctly on such small area using hands only
3am and I am thinking of building a stand.1
Sure you can specify svg object attributes x, y, width and height in metric values like mm and after put things on paper get same printed output but if you want to transform svg object you need to calculate new values by yourself cause you can’t simply provide translate (10mm, 10mm).
Now I ended up with manually converting values to mm.
Making free transform tool for exact document data rendering inside browser is pain in the ass.
I started to wonder how google docs or microsoft word for web deal with this stuff.2
The last one and only one I joined was online and called “flex bug squash”.
It was about ~8-9 years ago.
I won Flex Builder desktop software license and I was using it after so I think it was cool.
Fun, creative times it was.
That was also first and last significant thing I won and then Steve killed flash on mobile and as a result killed flash.
Thanks Steve if you’re reading this.
I wanted to take small loan from bank I am loyal customer for 15 years to speed up things by month. I decided to pay money for it.
They have some online form for it and I filled it.
So what happened next ?
I got call to confirm every input I filled (heard keyboard typing every time I answered question).
I asked how long I will wait and got response that it will take couple of hours, max 2 days.
Just received another call 10 days later that they need documents to prove my income.
They got 15 years history of every operation and it looks like it means nothing.
I said to person I will earn this money faster then I get it from them so at this point this conversation is just waste of my time.
It’s 10 days left till end of month and I think it will be easier to just wait or ask friend for a favor.
Yet another reason to say fuck banks.
Time is money.2
Yeah finally facebook surveillance station. Can’t wait to install one in my toilet.
Any long time ps users ?
How does ps3 3d games like uncharted 3 compare with new tech ps4 vr games ? Which is better experience ?2
Risk is part of my everyday life.
I take the risk everyday when opening IDE and changing line of code that can either break database or crash other systems that are depending on one I am developing. ( not instantly but in some time in the future )
Many years ago I was updating some application server production code while being drunk.
Everything went fine except me waking up in the morning and didn’t remember how I did it.
... what I learned from my developers life except that heavy drinking and updating servers is not the best idea ?
First, don’t give a fuck, do your job and ask questions even if the person in front of you said that understood everything and you think you understood all of shit.
Second, if you think you know what to do think twice.
Third, having any backup, any tests and any documentation is always better then having nothing.
And the most important.
The most risky in every business are people around you, so always have good people around and there would be no risk at all or you won’t even think about it.
1. Creativity - you can create anything from typing words and a little electricity - office programs, new medicines, predicting cancer from images, robots, planes, satellites, rockets that put people to the Moon or robots to Mars - all use machines programmed with code.
2. Challenge - some of the projects and algorithms are so complicated that full understanding of them is great challenge.
3. Freedom - you only need a laptop and internet and a bit of electricity and you can code from anywhere on Earth or if you’re Astronaut you can even code from space.
Goal for 2019
- finish project I started in Q4 2018 and launch website with it
- maybe find some non invasive way to monetize this and earn some money
If I got time and power left :
- learn more autodesk fusion,
- design robotic arm using above tool
- print it in 3d
- program it with ROS arduino/rpi
- put it on some wheels
- make it driving around my flat
- make it pick up stuff for me
Second day/night with language server protocol and after “I hate my life phase” I think I am starting to understand this shit ( read found enough libraries and examples that are written in some kind of understandable manner to my little brain).
Fucking learning process and no prior knowledge of typescript doesn’t help.
Time to write some simple language server prototype.
Would it be nice when I rotate phone screen it could rotate application icons ?
How many people are picking up their phones wrong side ?2
I am reading third book
“The Cult of Fog Island” and now I am 100% sure that shitting on employees and micromanagement are forms of cult and sect.
People who do it are narcissistic dumb fucks just wanting to lick CEO or their own ass and get prize for what they didn’t do.
Well fuck them I hope they burn in hell.
Lesson learned from my previous rant:
CPU bottleneck spotted. Time to fix some shit.
nvidia-docker vs native code execution brings around 10% performance decrease so far.
Probable microsoft inside talk about github acquisition:
m$ lawyers: We need to pull this github repository to find our patents and claim the suit against this company that is making some android powered hardware, also the other one from company that want to make operating system with double mouse click
m$ management: This patent violation search is taking to much resources so let’s acquire github and order them to develop some automatic shit over their repositories so we don’t have to pull those repos all over again
The rest you can read in news :)
The most stressful day of month.
I need to put hours into hour counting programs so computer can analyze those hours using deep learning algorithms and pay me a wage I don't deserve.
Each program work differently.
One of it works inside the local company network.
Other one I need to connect outside from company network.
In all of them I can't make mistake or I need to write to someone to fix my mistakes.
One of this programs use java applet, other is simple php website.
One of them blocks row in calendar when I click so when I login again and click I can't edit this row because it's locked by me who is editing this row.
One of them is requesting me to provide my work in minutes.
I need to follow strict procedures to report any holidays or national holidays that I need first figure out when they happen.
Wish me luck.1
Side project update.
Made simple nlp library in python and published it’s first version to open source.
Now I can feed it with parsed pdf text.
See rant https://devrant.com/rants/2192388/...
Cause during reading book about nltk I couldn’t find simple extendible way to provide support for polish language and I wanted to abstract stemming, word normalization, tokenizer etc. so I can provide ex. different conditions for separate text files and don’t write much code what is an asset when you work solo.
It’s about 12GB of pdf public accessible law data I am trying to handle ( at first ) which is about 35000 files from last 90 years.
So far I automated downloading web pages and pdf documents from them. Extracting data from web pages and saving it to database. Extracting text from pdf files. I have about 5-6 projects to do all of it above maybe at the end I will put it to some workflow manager like Luigi or just run it by cronjob.
First thing for website version 1.0 part is find correlation between all documents inside law text using nlp library by building custom conditions. Then just generate directory structure and html files with links between documents.
Website version 2.0 is already in my mind but it will be creepy to make it and will take at least 1-2 months and I want to publish fast.
I have some pdfs with only images instead of text and tesseract worked quite good with them so maybe I will try to process them when everything go live.
Learned a lot about pdf as now I know that font in pdf is not always providing unicode characters ( stupid form of obfuscation) so when you extract text you need to build glyph vector to text map for every font.
Pdf is full vector representation - just like svg - what is logic if you think a bit and know that some printers are running using postscript.
Let’s hope next update will be about flutter mobile app which started all of shit above. It’s almost ready ( except getting data from api I am trying to do and logo for release version ). It’s last piece of puzzle.3
Digital transformation is pain in the ass, my customer migrated project management from self hosted jira to atlassian cloud.
I am finally able to login to this new amazing jira that looks completely different but still nothing is optimized to laptop screen so looks crap as before.
My issues are now assigned to not existing user.
At least I remember how to use basic JQL and reassign issues to me.
I feel bad to other team members.
Great waste of time.7
Finished my last audiobook and decided to start listening to Kevin Hearne druid series audiobook yesterday.
It’s really nice story about old druid ( looking like 20 something ) living in modern times in Arizona. Lots of Celtic mythology and great humorous dialogues.
I really enjoy it.3
Deadline was 2-3 days for product launch and doing distributed transactions was not an opinion as it requires heavy modifications.
I was doing money transfer app between one transactional system and one not transactional system so the way I did it was :
1. transfer money from one system to my app that was using Akka STM ( software transactional memory)
2. try to transfer money to second system
3. transfer money back on failure
There was no database, no state only transactional log as installing database would require to much time and paper work.
Sometimes transfer back failed so we need to look back at logs and search for money, it was quite easy cause there was error and there were not so many failed transactions like this.
About one or two in a month and everyone accepted that.
I started to write some sort of reconciliation thread but then was assigned to other work and it worked like this for couple of years transferring couple millions worth of transactions.1
Can’t wait for python 3.8 and pep-p572 Assignment expressions 👏👏
while chunk := file.read(1024):
Including critical build dependencies inside Android Studio.app instead of in a public repo... why?2
Write email with meeting topics before meeting.
Send summary email to all attendees after meeting.1