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* The app is almost ready, boss asked me to show the progress.
Boss: The design is bad, I don't like it 🤔
Me: I just implemented the design, which is approved
Boss: Really? because I "feel" that the design is bad on the screen.
Me: Okay 😐, can you tell me what exactly the part to change?
Boss: I don't know, *calls the designer
Designer: *showing his PSDs* yes it is the same, and you [the boss] approved it.
Boss: Ok make some changes to make it feel better.
Me: (Inside: 😡 ) ok, have you some suggestions?
Boss: dunno,
Me: at least tell me what is wrong with it
Boss: dunno
Me:🤢26 -
When I Made Passworts visible in Chrome and the teacher sent me home...
...It was Friday!
Ps:
She sent me home because she was really fu**ing scared of what I did and even called my Parents
9 -
Client: we need extraordinary website in ordinary price.
Me: ohk *google search* WordPress free theme.12 -
The interview was for an internship, I was so nervous about it and thats how I fu*ked it.
Q: So you have studied OOP?
A: Yes Sir, I have studied OOP in C language.
And the rest is history. 😃😃10 -
> Find new remote job that pays six figures.
> Only person in the house with income.
> Still not left alone to fucking work.
AFAJDLDHAFAHDKSLAKAGACAJFNSKDUEBXJCAWVWCSNXIXYEVXKCUDGRB/^&@FU+#9$/
JUST LET ME FUCKING WORK!19 -
Lads, I will be real with you: some of you show absolute contempt to the actual academic study of the field.
In a previous rant from another ranter it was thrown up and about the question for finding a binary search implementation.
Asking a senior in the field of software engineering and computer science such question should be a simple answer, specifically depending on the type of job application in question. Specially if you are applying as a SENIOR.
I am tired of this strange self-learner mentality that those that have a degree or a deep grasp of these fundamental concepts are somewhat beneath you because you learned to push out a website using the New Boston tutorials on youtube. FOR every field THAT MATTERS a license or degree is hold in high regards.
"Oh I didn't go to school, shit is for suckers, but I learned how to chop people up and kinda fix it from some tutorials on youtube" <---- try that for a medical position.
"Nah it's cool, I can fix your breaks, learned how to do it by reading blogs on the internet" <--- maintenance shop
"Sure can write the controller processing code for that boing plane! Just got done with a low level tutorial on some websites! what can go wrong!"
(The same goes for military devices which in the past have actually killed mfkers in the U.S)
Just recently a series of people were sent to jail because of a bug in software. Industries NEED to make sure a mfker has aaaall of the bells and whistles needed for running and creating software.
During my masters degree, it fucking FASCINATED me how many mfkers were absolutely completely NEW to the concept of testing code, some of them with years in the field.
And I know what you are thinking "fuck you, I am fucking awesome" <--- I AM SURE YOU BLOODY WELL ARE but we live in a planet with billions of people and millions of them have fallen through the cracks into software related positions as well as complete degrees, the degree at LEAST has a SPECTACULAR barrier of entry during that intro to Algos and DS that a lot of bitches fail.
NOTE: NOT knowing the ABSTRACTIONS over the tools that we use WILL eventually bite you in the ASS because you do not fucking KNOW how these are implemented internally.
Why do you think compiler designers, kernel designers and embedded developers make the BANK they made? Because they don't know memory efficient ways of deploying a product with minimal overhead without proper data structures and algorithmic thinking? NOT EVERYTHING IS SHITTY WEB DEVELOPMENT
SO, if a mfker talks shit about a so called SENIOR for not knowing that the first mamase mamasa bloody simple as shit algorithm THROWN at you in the first 10 pages of an algo and ds book, then y'all should be offended at the mkfer saying that he is a SENIOR, because these SENIORS are the same mfkers that try to at one point in time teach other people.
These SENIORS are the same mfkers that left me a FUCKING HORRIBLE AND USELESS MESS OF SPAGHETTI CODE
Specially to most PHP developers (my main area) y'all would have been well motherfucking served in learning how not to forLoop the fuck out of tables consisting of over 50k interconnected records, WHAT THE FUCK
"LeaRniNG tHiS iS noT neeDed!!" yes IT fucking IS
being able to code a binary search (in that example) from scratch lets me know fucking EXACTLY how well your thought process is when facing a hard challenge, knowing the basemotherfucking case of a LinkedList will damn well make you understand WHAT is going on with your abstractions as to not fucking violate memory constraints, this-shit-is-important.
So, will your royal majesties at least for the sake of completeness look into a couple of very well made youtube or book tutorials concerning the topic?
You can code an entire website, fine as shit, you will get tested by my ass in terms of security and best practices, run these questions now, and it very motherfucking well be as efficient as I think it should be(I HIRE, NOT YOU, or your fucking blog posts concerning how much MY degree was not needed, oh and btw, MY degree is what made sure I was able to make SUCH decissions)
This will make a loooooooot of mfkers salty, don't worry, I will still accept you as an interview candidate, but if you think you are good enough without a degree, or better than me (has happened, told that to my face by a candidate) then get fucking ready to receive a question concerning: BASIC FUCKING COMPUTER SCIENCE TOPICS
* gays away into the night53 -
My start in new company....
HR: you will get a Macbook from us...
Me: yessss!!!!
~~~
One Day before first Day:
I Picked up the laptop from company...opened the case....
No Macbook, but HP 😂😂😂...🤷♀️
~~~
First Day at new company:
PM: you will be using Ps, Sketch....
ME: how will be the licence costs payed?
PM: it is already installed...
ME: wait, what? It's nothing in my Laptop.. Wait what? Sketch?....I haven't recieved a Mac....
PM: What?????🤦♀️.....
~~~
Later in the same Day...
My laptop: Fu*k you!!! Your account has been disabled. Contact your system Administrátor...
ME: wtf????? 🤷♀️🤦♀️
.....to be continued....23 -
one of my cousin ask me to help him for uploading his ex's private pics and videos on porn websites.
Because her parents are not allowing their marriage and she is not ready to go against family (he is not working anywhere, Jobless)
I simply take screenshots of our chat and send to his ex and her parents.
Hope they will punish him.16 -
once you start using linux on laptop. here is a condition of your mouse.
i don't know when I touched it last time.
16 -
*signs up for Skillshare*
> Sorry, your password is longer than our database's glory hole can handle.
> Please shorten your password cumload to only 64 characters at most, otherwise our database will be unhappy.
Motherf-...
Well, I've got a separate email address from my domain and a unique password for them. So shortening it and risking getting that account stolen by plaintext shit won't really matter, especially since I'm not adding payment details or anything.
*continues through the sign-up process for premium courses, with "no attachments, cancel anytime"*
> You need to provide a credit card to continue with our "free" premium trial.
Yeah fuck you too. I don't even have a credit card. It's quite uncommon in Europe, you know? We don't have magstripe shit that can go below 0 on ya.. well the former we still do but only for compatibility reasons. We mainly use chip technology (which leverages asymmetric cryptography, awesome!) that usually can't go much below 0 here nowadays. Debit cards, not credit cards.
Well, guess it's time to delete that account as well. So much for acquiring fucking knowledge from "experts". Guess I'll have to stick to reading wikis and doing my ducking-fu to select reliable sources, test them and acquire skills of my own. That's how I've done it for years, and that's how it's been working pretty fucking well for me. Unlike this deceptive security clusterfuck!14 -
Saw an add on my fb feed:
"We will make you a programmer in 6 weeks" - course in programming.
6 f*king weeks! I've been studying 5 years, wrote down butt loads of code, debugged billions of bugs, read hundreds pages of documentation and I wouldn't call my self a full developed programmer.
But hey, those fu*kers will make you a programmer in 6 weeks!15 -
"Please make the splash screen longer, 3-5 seconds at least"
So you are the "mobile UX expert"? Do you realize people want to achieve things without wasting time and patience? In 5 seconds I may get distracted with a notification or anything else IRL and I I'll even forget I ever opened your app. Puf, you lost a potentially paying user.
All this just to give some fu***** visibility to some small logos of your sponsors. What about an about page so everybody is happy?4 -
If you are not wasting your 10hours to automate your half hour work then you are not a real programmer.6
-
So I wrote a py script that calculated the total no. of the word "fu*k" found in rants -
Here are the results have a look.
Although I expected more, since in every other rant people use the word "fu*k" :/
This is in context with my previous rant -
https://devrant.io/rants/862267/...
30 -
I'm freaking the fuck out.
After months of learning from bootcamp and on my own, after a month of no resumes replied to, after almost giving up I finally got a job opportunity in front-end web development.
The thing is, I have to pass their online test to verify my JavaScript-fu.
3 hours.
4 tasks.
And I feel like garbage who can't understand even the most basic algorithms.
By the power of Grayskull, I don't think I have the power...
Wish me luck.16 -
a dude just DROPPED the whole Fu**ing mongodb cluster. like Right Now.
multiple databases, expanding multiple projects.
fortunately in dev. but dunno how much data is recoverable.14 -
In college, teacher teams us with other guy,
I tell him to do backend coding in JS
He says: Dude, What is JS?
Fu*k7 -
Fellow Dev: the clients are requesting a gallery on their website with functioning modals.
Me: okay cool
So for the record, I'm new to front-end and I've got quite a lot to learn in JavaScript.
*I googled as much as I could and I made a proper functioning gallery in 2 full days of coding*
Him: okay, so this is great but they aren't really digging it.
Me: *sigh* yes, so what do they want?
Him: have you seen how an image opens in Google images? Like you click on one, the image opens while the rest of the content shifts down?
Me: um... Yeah?
Him: yeah, so they want that.
Me: ... *Scoops the web trying to figure out how Google does it*. Dude, I can't find anything close to it and I've still got a lot to learn. Idk how to do it.
Him: well, you're being paid for that. So, you better do it.
Me: 1000Rs ( approx. 14.58$ ) isn't called "being paid". Gimme a break here.
Him: You're a novice rn.
Me: why don't you do it?
Him: I'm your boss.
*Sigh* (he indeed is my boss)
Him: deal with it.
Me: FU........C.....*suddenly I realized how it's done* OH OH OH OH I just got it, I just got it!
(I actually make something like that)
*Lol yay*
That's just my best story of a fight. Lol.5 -
Coworker: "Look our WebApp loads much faster in Chrome (0.8s) than in Firefox (4.6s). This clearly shows that Chrome has the better JS-Engine"
Me internally: "No, it just shows how bad your JS-Code is, and not optimized, you dense Mo**Fu**"5 -
Best client ever:
Yesterday I meet my new client. He need portfolio website for his logistics business.
So I meet him and explain my previous experience in website development.
After 1hour he gave me advance 50% of total cost.1 -
!dev related whatsoever fuck off if this bothers you
Just got into a big argument with my brother in law because the little bitch was exposing my father and mother in law(which I adore) to the virus by virtue of this little shit partying every other fucking day, going out with people etc and then having my in laws pick him up etc.
I am not gonna lie, I love the kid, but this shit pisses me the fuck off, my in laws are over 60 each and I ain't about to fuck with the chances of my child's grandparents dying because some fucktard thinks partying is more important.
Been wishing for the motherfucker that would since a while now, just hope it's not this kid.5 -
I hate this work from home shit with your family around. "You're always in front of the computer, go workout, go socialize, its family time"
What part of "work from home" you don't understand. SMH!9 -
Global variables in JavaScript everywhere... Being accessed by every file, every function every class... Everywhere....5
-
I don't know which should make me worry:
1. the fact a gradle build for a new project is taking 90% of CPU
2. The fact CPU Freq isn't going higher than 2.18 when it can go up to 3.1?
3. The fact gradle is always taking 5 minutes to build when it used to take 1 minute for a medium project?
15 -
A bug is never just a mistake. It represents something bigger. An error of thinking. That makes you who you are.
-ElliotAlderson: -
Me (front dev): We should use nodejs for this project...
CTO (back): Nah... Fu*k Node! Php ftw
Now: we have a php framework with a nodejs server for the front end6 -
*while drinking tea at cafe area*
me*thinking* : may be this is going to solve that error
yes
yess
yesssss
I got solution
but wait let's first drink this tea then I will try this solution
*came back on desk*
me*thinking* : -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
what was solution ? wtf?1 -
Fu*king Windows!!!
Integrating Linux kernel into their new build.
Microsoft Edge insiders experimenting with Chromium engine.
Microsoft has now bowed down to the open source community...
All hail Linus Torvalds!!!!
All hail Linux!!!
All hail Open Source!!!
WE WON24 -
Google cripples ad and tracking blockers: In January, Chromium will switch to Manifest V3 which removes an essential API in favour of an inferior one. As usually, Google is being deceitful and touts security concerns as pretext.
That hits all Chromium based browser, such as my beloved Vivaldi. The team argues with their own browser internal blocker, but that's far worse than uBlock Origin. One of Vivaldi's core promises was privacy, and that will go out of the window. The team simply doesn't react to people pointing that out. They're fucked, and they know it.
So what now? Well, going back to Firefox because that will include the crippled new API for extension compatibility, but also keep the powerful old one specifically so that ad and tracking blockers will keep working. Google has just handed Mozilla a major unique selling point, and miraculously, Mozilla didn't fuck it up.26 -
What a fu*#king stupid landlord. They got my devrant poster by mail and opened it. Not only that, they posted it on their wall for fun. YOU FU*#KING C*NTS22
-
“This must be Thursday,' said Arthur to himself, sinking low over his beer. 'I never could get the hang of Thursdays.”
― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
^^ this couldn't come more handy..
It's thursday, my computer didn't auto reboot due to updates (yaaay) but VS decided to kill my keyboard shortcuts nevertheless... :\
FU VS!!
Wen't to check, it's actually still there (written) ok..
Me: Why won't you work?!
VS: Not tellin..
Me: Dafaq?! Ok, I'll delete you and reset..
VS: Nope, you won't!
Me: Why don't you allow the same shortcut to be assigned?! Why is nothing getting typed in?!
VS: Dunno, to piss you off maybe?
Me: What's wrong with you?!
VS: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa4 -
My first thought was "it can't be so hard to build a AI who simulate emotions "
So i started studying the Human brain .... well it's fu**ing complicated, but also interesting af
Still hope i can develop a little robot who have emotions like happiness, sadness or anger
7 -
It's 1:20am
Body: let's sleep.
Heart: beer or rum.
Brain: why the hell js is not working as expected? -
OS : Tail OS ✓
pass : 16+ ✓
Update password : every 15 days ✓
Mac address : spoofing ✓
Then you realise
Your Aadhar information is in gov DB.
14 -
My life was total mess up before this I.e.
Break
Return from death door
Drop in education
Financial unstable
Literally 1.5-2years was worst.
From last 3-5 months
I gave up FB(personal account ,I need it for digital marketing)
Unfollow every entertainment page from Instagram
Join Twitter
Increase activity in devrant
Subscribe to development related content in reddit
New YouTube channel just for learning purpose (never search songs and other stuff on it)
Start reading books like zero to one,think and grow rich....
Biography's of great people's like
Steve jobs
Elon Musk
Shivaji Maharaj
And many more
Stop chatting on stupid topics (hot girls,....)
Attained meditation camp
Start meditation (Vipassana)
Life feels more sorted
Thanks everyone13 -
Code comment rant of the day... fcking excel just cost me over half an hour to fix the fking formatting...
1 -
My work just gave me a new MacBook Pro with the Touch Bar. Dear Apples, I can’t even!!!!
What a piece is shit! I can’t charge my phone, plug in my monitor or my mouse without a freakin dongle! Worse of all, I can’t feel the keys to reduce volume, I always have to look does at the Touch Bar, tap twice to reduce the volume. How inefficient!
FU Apple! FU!7 -
!rant
Many dev ranting that apple is reached $1T by selling stupid connector's...... and other shit.
I am not apple product owner.
But Today I want to salute steve jobs.
A person without college degree,drug addiction,guilt of adopted son,financial issue's without any god father........................
Created one company.
Kicked out from own company.
Joinned again.
developed such policy in company that every one should follow.
took retirement due to cancer and all right's transfer to A Gay CEO.
and
now that company reached $1T.
Really fucking motivational thing.
Nothing is impossible.26 -
There are 20 of us in the whole team. Each of us are entitled to 1 month of leave/year. Then here's the manager telling us that there should be no overlapping dates of leave vacations. FU!!2
-
I would like to share my gum collection at work. I like chewing something. I bought all of these though. We dont have free food in our work.
19 -
What the fuck man.
Why even I am working with this assholes.
Yesterday,Our technical support guy reinstalled windows(I don't mess up with technical issues because then it will be my part time job,so I show that I don't know anything about hardware).
He installed fucking 32 bit window,He was trying to installed 64 bit version thunderbird.
He wasted my whole day.16 -
The amount of elitism you see inside of the dev community is the reason why I consider changing careers.
No, It don't hurt my feelings. I just don't want to surround myself from sexually frustrated loosers that think that getting cool points on the internet over hating and shitting over other's likes and dislikes means something.
It sucks balls and I smell the areas to be of dried cum and Cheetos.
Fuck man, being born ugly, anti-charismatic and weird must suck big balls37 -
client : show website
me: sir server is down
client : what? I don't know,I want to see my website.
me: sir try to understand it is not my issue
client *call cut*
fucking asshole -_-1 -
Dear Zoom,
STOP FUCKING TAKING OVER THE DAMN WINDOW FOCUS WHEN SOMEBODY SHARES THEIR SCREEN
P.S.: Even your own chat is no exception. That's just plain stupid21 -
long message
whatsapp : * scroll *
reply : depend on last line happy sad whatever emoji ,sent same
devrant : *something important ,I must read everything* -
Random guy to 3d artist : Want to listen joke
3d artist : sure
Random guy : Mac
3d artist : Fu×k u2 -
The previous manager bought an expensive enterprise level cms with 0 support and documentacion for doing shit, for which the only ninja that knows how to operate it is our cms admin.
And I saw this person posting shit on her instagram about loving wordpress.
Wish your ass would've known about it before you got us this 58k pos system...
Say whatever the fuck you want about wordpress, yeh its fucky, but not fucky AND expensive........8 -
PM: You can cut corners it it's necessary.
Me: Thanks for giving me permission to move faster.
*But as you know, I wouldn't be in this position if you hadn't made us agree to such an unrealistic deadline.*
..
...
*after completion*
.
.
PM: There are bugs in the code.
ME: There are bugs, because you asked me to cut corners. *fu#k you* *wtf moment*4 -
Internships are fucking bullshit and if more senior developers were to take the role of an actual mentor to coach juniors properly then the state of software engineering would be better.
Some people can be let down easy in terms of "this is not for you bruh", others can be built. I know that social interactions are not common for a lot of the morons in here, but being polite and kind is relatively simple if you know what you are doing. Being a dickhead != "royal levels of expertise" and if we were to coach more people into proper development practices then software would not be in such a shitty state.
For an environment that thrives in cooperation I find it hard to believe that we are still subjecting new people to the field to what can be considered slavery with little to actual no monetary compensation.
I removed many of the requirements for the application to a software developer job where I am at (I am the boss, I get to do shit like that) and my fight with HR was "I would rather someone fresh from college that I can coach properly than some dickhead with years on the field that won't listen to anything else than their own words"
Sure it would be slow, sure it would be hard, nothing ever is that simple, but my idea is "train this mkfer, level the fuck out of him, let him be off to great shit rather than giving him to some dickhead that will treat him like shit on account of being a newbie"
And yes, I do know how and what can go bad, I am going to have someone desinging shit in basic html/js/css with some php here and there not giving them the keys to every server I control. Thank you for your fucking concerns, I know what I am doing.
the experiment fails? GOOD more data for me.
Plus, you learn more when you teach others.16 -
job ad said "need senior back-end developer", with skills:java, c++, node.js,etc. went to their office for interview and they just needed man for installing windows and things like that.
Conclusion: dont fu*kin put every language in requirements you heard when dont need any of them1 -
WOW!! What a fucking cop out. After what happened yesterday about branching. my senior and our boss had a meeting and I wasn’t included. My senior then message me to next time dont create another branch just use the existing branch even if it was merged. I said “ok but i thought thats the best practice, we we’re doing that since the beginning”. Senior then responded “Whats best practice for our boss, that will be our best practice” what a fucking cop out!!! Bitch!!23
-
Do you get random nostalgic moments when you see things you saw as a child?
i sometimes put on the early Harry Potter movies, since they came out as I was reading the books as a child. They fucking work miracles for my mood. But that is just me.Currently watching Prisoner of Azkaban, my favorite one, as I work. Gives me warm feelings as much as the rest. The entire series is my favorite, regardless of things that were changed.6 -
When you spend 1 hour trying to hide content by changing a class but then realise that you have a “display: block” overwriting said class 13 lines higher up. Fu** me. Fu** CSS.
6 -
Don't scroll here.
Go and live a real life,
Don't make a computer screen as your world,
there is a beautiful world outside of your cave,
Talk with people's face to face,
go
go
go.
Ok enough philosophy, Time to add new shit in current shitty code.
(-_-)5 -
Created a variable in the middle of a rant with JavaScript and named it as an acronym for "mother fucker", it actually worked what I tried to do with it... "mother fucker" is in production now2
-
This scene is an 8-year-old.
My friend(F) got his first mobile. First featured mobile.
Maximum smartness in that mobile was a snake game and Bluetooth.
So I decided to prank him.
M: Bro do you know this particular model need a network to use Bluetooth?
F: I am not stupid to believe you.
M: I can prove that.
F: K prove me, I will give you treat.
M: ok, turn on your Bluetooth paired it with my Bluetooth.
F: Ok
*start sending him the movie. We were on the train, a train was about to enter the tunnel*
M: When the train will enter a tunnel, We will lose network and sending will fail.
F: ok let's see.
*when a train enters in a tunnel, we shift light to black in meantime for 3-4 sec our eyes feel blindness. so I closed eyes before entering a tunnel and once train enter in the tunnel immediately restart Bluetooth *
M: look sending failed
F: Seriously man, I didn't know that.
M: It's ok bro next time inform me before buying any electronics.
F: sure
M: my treat?
F: Yup
*for next few days, he was thinking that Bluetooth need a network to send files until whole group laugh on him*4 -
!RANT
my friend who never smoke or drink or relationship to much career oriended.working in multinational company. recently south african petrol company gave offer letter to him.
he was ill from few days.(completed his engineering in civil with 9.1 pointer last year.)
somekind of syndrome found in him. due to which he will not able to walk in 2 years.
he share this information with me. asking me tips,"how to inform my mom dad? I don't wan to face them. I can't do anything for them."
life is fucking unfair with some peoples.1 -
Sometimes it's irritating
Workstation in office : windows/Mac
Home : Ubuntu
Virtual machine : fedora
Developing : LFS (just for hobby)
😂😂😂
Still searching for arch and BSD 😂😂7 -
Best Hardware support team.
I hope every one of you got such team.
My keyboard was not working properly.
programmer's most used special character ; is auto typing anywhere that is obviously keyboard issue so I called H/W support team.
me: *explained above problem.*
supporter : Ya we know that issue ,YOUR HARD DRIVE IS CORRUPTED. We have 2 option
1) either we can formate your system.
2) We have to change hard drive.
Me thinking : *devrant stuff found*
Me: that is really sad part. How many time you solved such problem?
S: This is my first time in this company ,previously I solved such issue more than 10 time.
Me: you really look smart.
S: thank you,any how I will resolved this issue today.
Me: today I am going earlier but yes we will meet on monday. thank you for quick response.7 -
Am I the only one, who likes to hate the tester for sending back your code, when I should be greatful for him/her for finding bugs?
Replies from me by the amount I get my ticket back:
1: okay, sure, thanks
2: all right
3: oh, okay
4: what? still not okay?
5: how did you even catch that?
6: what the fu** is wrong with you?
7: you again???
8: die already!
9: <singing the frozen theme> Let it go, let it go!1 -
I needed a new laptop to work/study and found a suitable one on Lenovo's website...
25th of july :
- "your order has been placed... blablabla.. it will take approximately from 1 to 2 weeks to prepare and 3-5 days shipping.."
- hum... Ok.. seems long to just put RAM and SSD inside my laptop but alright..
31st of july :
- "unfortunately your order has been delayed, the new shipping date is estimated for August, 14"
- Fuck ! Ill be patient then.. hopefully it'll be ready earlier than that..
10th of August :
- "unfortunately your order has been delayed, the new shipping date is estimated for september, 7"
- WHAT THE FU.. ?!? YOU DENSE MOTHERFUCKER, HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE TO PUT 8 FUCKING GIGS OF RAM AND AN SSD PLEASE TELL ME ?!? IS IT A JOKE OR WHAT ?! I FLY ABROAD THE 17TH OF SEPTEMBER YOU BETTER SHIP MY LAPTOP IN TIME !!
I'm really mad now and thinking of cancelling the order.. I might have no time to test the laptop before flying.. FUCK !!4 -
You know that figurative bonner you have when working on new/exciting projects?
I used to be like that here...
Today I realized that I lost it a long time ago...
That sucks hard, every little script I do on the side I feel excited , every functionality I develop on the job is a fucking mirror of some other shit that no one uses on another mirror project that brings nothing new to the table.5 -
I don't understand people who write "Fu*k" instead of "Fuck", dude everyone know what's that means anyway and you definitely not going to become a Honorable man or you will go to heaven by doing this. Seriously.11
-
You can fuck right off.
First it won't let me have two of the same characters consectively, which fine, technically makes a more secure password.
But then blocks more than 12 characters?
Fu.
3 -
small victories... leaving little fuck you notes all over the code..
along with all the test cunts that still get incremented on the production..
-
FU*** unnamed company..... lets recap.
I went for a job interview at this unnamed company i was acting like me and dress like i normally do, witch is good not extrem like a model but normal OK. like you would see in any company.
Yes maybe i could have got a haircut but you know time...
but not to drift, i when i was myself in the interview and no out of the ordinary things happend....
3 days later they call with feedback and you properly guest it! they did not like my appearance..
Like why? my feedback to them was to think that refusing someone based on there personal statement of looking fucking average JO is not good thing to do. and that it makes them look like big "i am better than you..." jerks....
of course there was more of this so called "feedback".
They also ask if i had any feedback for them... i kindly suggested that they need to invest in training how to not judge people on how they look but on there ability of there work and skill....
pfff.. that gone! alright thanks devrant for this outlet.5 -
OMFG!! My computer rebooted.. after VS is again performing voodoo stuff on my code..can you please fucking stop reformatting everything!? OMG it's driving me crazy, I've already disabled every format option I could find.. you piss me off one more time, I'm switching to np++!!!!6
-
>Be client
>Have an issue with incredibly slow webpage load time
>Blame memcache issues
So... I look into the problem. Yes, the page either loads up fast, or times out. So, into the logs I go. Webserver is fine (except the timeout), PHP though... Error log is fine (just notices), but slow log shows the issue is the database (of course... its always the database... ugh)
So, checking the database, there is one ugly query that seems to be an issue. 5 joins and a huge where condition.
So I run EXPLAIN on the query and... Proceed to bang my head against the wall.
OF COURSE ITS SLOW YOU FU******, NONE OF YOUR TABLES HAVE ANY INDEXES.
What do they expect when the database has to always go down the whole table and do everything in memory, until it runs out and has to dump it all on disk and work with it there.
Ugh... Some clients... -
So, last night I came home from work and "Kung Fu Hustle" was on (cable). I watched it for like ten minutes and then turned it off. Didn't even think about it after.
Just a couple of hours ago I was on YouTube and a clip from that movie came up as a suggested video. On a browser where I'm not logged in. On a computer that's not mine. That is behind a proxy server. That is in a continent far away from me.
Am I crazy or that is actually Google doing that?10 -
I really do like Flutter/Dart but I just cannot be the only who thinks that the way to create several nested components/widgets is even close to somewhat readable, what the fu** Google.
6 -
Ok so we just signed a new client with some "artificial intelligence" back-end...
To authenticate with their back end, they developed a FU**ING GET REQUEST so the username and password are passed in the URL.
Then we get a token that we pass in FU**ING GET REQUESTS to communicate with their "artificial intelligence enhanced" back end.
I can't even. I just can't.5 -
Food and Programmers life:
Spaghetti —> My Code
Pizza —> We are spending the night working in the office
Power Drinks —> delivery date is tomorrow morning
Candy —> extra task
Coffee —> bug massage
Water —> wash your face, we have meetings in five minutes
Truffle —> fu** BlockChain
KitKat —> upgrade your phone please
Lollipop —> one more time please
Marshmallow —> do you like some Nougat?7 -
I appreciate if someone explains this to me:
Designers ask that we put three images in a grid layout on an Android device so that they can compare which image looks better, and guess what is changed in theses three images: font size changes one point in each image.
My question is: Is this normal? Designers need to see it on a screenshot to be able to decide which fits better?9 -
Need suggestion:
I gave interview in small company. They give me task to complete one project then we will give you job.
It takes me 2 weeks.
Now they are ready to give me job but they want that project in free of cost. What should I do?7 -
When I got in this job:
No test, 0% coverage
No teamwork
No documentation (front and backend)
Senior doesnt want to talk
1year later:
We have test prolly 10% coverage
Still no team work
No documentation
Senior doesn’t want to talk
Ps: tried doing documentation but I cant unless my senior will help me because I dont know the ins and outs of the codebase.
I say crap.11 -
Me: ill use media queries to make our site responsive (site is not responsive before i got here)
Me: code ...
Me: code ...
Me: done, created a PR
Senior: review... removes all the code and media queries and said. We dont have to use media queries because bootstrap is already responsive.
- BULLSHIT! We still need media queries!!!!!27 -
what are your fav songs while coding?
mine:
old bollywood (black and white) songs and instrumental music mostly hariprasad chaurasia's flute.13 -
We are so fucked up at our company:
While the support for our client hardware is running out, our operation departement has just found out that Windows 7 is no longer supported on new HW. Well, that for itself is not bad, but we have a really old tool for reporting our daily work. And because that mo*fu*ing piece of customized software still runs in 16bit mode, it will not run on Win 10 anymore.
Alternative solutions are too expensive, so I see that we will have to port that crap somehow from 1997 to 2017 ourself 😲 Replacing is not an option because there are a ton of Excel sheets connected to the database, even the company balance is made with that data (and also in Excel). At least it is our CEO which has built that crap. So he has to pay for his twenty year old sins!4 -
Though I demonstrated a hard upperbound on the D(10) dedekind in the link here (https://devrant.com/rants/8414096/...), a value of 1.067*(10^83), which agrees with and puts a bound on this guy's estimate (https://johndcook.com/blog/2023/...) of 3.253*10^82, I've done a little more work.
It's kind of convoluted, and involves sequences related to the following page (https://oeis.org/search/...) though I won't go into detail simply because the explaination is exhausting.
Despite the large upperbound, the dedekinds have some weirdness to them, and their growth is non-intuitive. After working through my results, I actually think D(10) will turn out to be much lower than both cook's estimate and my former upperbound, that it'll specifically be found among the values of..
1.239*(10^43)
2.8507*(10^46)
2.1106*(10^50)
If this turns out to be correct (some time before the year 2100, lol), I'll explain how I came to the conclusion then.8 -
Does anyone else get blackouts at the end of the week. I mean those moments when you stare at the screen and wonder what the fu*k were you doing right now.
-
Still water eventually starts to stink
keep moving. Keep your mind open. Always be the student. And the teacher [borrowed from kung-fu panda, though very valid in this context] -
I continue to internally read and study about Smalltalk in an effort to see where we might have FUCKED UP and went backwards in terms of software engineering since I do not believe that complex source code based languages are the solution.
So I have Pharo. Nothin to complex really, everything is an object, yet, you do have room for building DSL's inside of it over a simple object model with no issue, the system browser can be opened across multiple screens (morph windows inside of a smalltalk system) for which you can edit you code in composable blocks with no issues. Blocks being a particular part of the language (think Ruby in more modern features) give ample room for functional programming. Thus far we have FP and OO (the original mind you) styles out in the open for development.
Your main code can be executed and instantly ALTER the live environment of a program as it is running, if what you are trying to do is stupid it won't affect the live instance, live programming is ahead of its time, and impressive, considering how old Smalltalk is. GUI applications can be given headless (this is also old in terms of how this shit was first distributed) So I can go ahead and package the virtual machine with the entire application into a folder, and distribute it agains't an organization "but why!!!! that package is 80+ mbs!") yeah cuz it carries the entire virtual machine, but go ahead and give it to the Mac user, or the Linux user, it will run, natively once it is clicked.
Server side applications run in similar fashion to php, in terms of lifecycles of request and how session storage is handled, this to me is interesting, no additional runtimes, drop it on a server, configure it properly and off you go, but this is common on other languages so really not that much of a point.
BUT if over a network a user is using your application and you change it and send that change over the network then the the change is damn near instant and fault tolerant due to the nature of the language.
Honestly, I don't know what went wrong or why we are not bringing this shit to the masses, the language was built for fucking kids, it was the first "y'all too stupid to get it, so here is simple" engine and we still said "nah fuck it, unlimited file system based programs, horrible build engines and {}; all over the place"
I am now writing a large budget managing application in Pharo Smalltalk which I want to go ahead and put to test soon at my institution. I do not have any issues thus far, other than my documentation help is literally "read the source code of the package system" which is easy as shit since it is already included inside. My scripts are small, my class hierarchies cover on themselves AND testing is part of the system. I honestly see no faults other than "well....fuck you I like opening vim and editing 300000000 files"
And honestly that is fine, my questions are: why is a paradigm that fits procedural, functional and OBVIOUSLY OO while including an all encompassing IDE NOT more famous, SELECTION is fine and other languages are a better fit, but why is such environment not more famous?9 -
Atom vs Visual Studio Code
What are you using and why?
I'm currently on Atom and wanna try out VSCode. Having looked at the settings (Holy fu**, are there many of 'em) I feel kind of lost.28 -
Look in a fu**ing log files...There you will find answers for almost 90% of "oh, i have some error" problems.2
-
My grade in basic programming course went from B to C, determined by a fu****g semi colon! One damn semicolon!!!
Bare in mind that my digital exam was in NOTEPAD with no IDE, no syntax highligting, nothing but black on white!
Is there really any compilator, or realistic job environment, where this could be so devestating?!?!11 -
I found this funny, or my dev-humor is just really bad :>
Friend: Ugh
Friend: Java and BlueJ.
Friend: Why you indicate relationships between classes that have no relationships.
Friend: Fu BueJ
Me: It's called a crush :wink:
Me: *badum-tssss*
Precision: As in having a crush on a person, but no relationship :)1 -
most productive workflow I ever seen.
excel 1 : stock
excel 2 : order
compare stock with order manually 1000+ product.
excel 3 : check history of order generator (shop)
excel 4 : today's price of product + tax
excel 5 : alot specific unit's of product
excel 6 : maintained bill credit/debit
next step : forword to managers for approval
excel 7 : edit's from nanager
process repeat till managers approval
excel 8 : dispatched history
excel 9 : return product (reason's/unit)
excel 10 : stock update return + new product's
and few more excel's
data of 5+ year's
daily 500+ order's
lPO listed company
i have not mentioned account and other stuff
(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻2 -
Me: Who wrote this fu$$in mess of code? Never mind, we will get the dirty hacker.
*Runs git blame*
*Silence*
Me: What a innovative way to solve the problem! I'm a genius! -
Long-time, no-rant.
I use Linux everywhere all the time. I'm not a huge gamer, but I like a few titles. Most run in Wine or can be made to run with effort in a VM. No biggie.
What I want to know from mobile/game devs is (sorry for ridiculously compound logic in non-lang):
IF you== gamedeveloper && you.haz({shitty}iOS_App) && you.haz({shitty}Android_App) &&
you.haz({shitty}WinXXX_App) && you.haz({shitty}MacOS_App):
THEN:
why(!you.haz({any}Linux_App))
return(excuse.shitty());
That. is. all. read on.3 -
May be it is small thing to many people's but as a less experience Developer it is big thing for me.
I AM GOING TO LEAD PROJECT.😊
Ohk project is not so big..3 -
Project: Angular 11
Package doc 2.1: For Angular 13+
Package release 2.1: For Angular 12+
Me: Well, this package solve our problem but it need Angular 12 or 13 to run, so do we go for 13 ?
Team: yep,the update is on schedule so take it and update it later.
Me: We can also go to 14 directly.
Team: No, we prefer LTS version
...some weeks later...
Team: Update to 13 complete !
Me: Yes ! Let's go !
...Install package 2.1...
... Compilation...
🚫 Angular 14 is required for version 2.1
Me: are you fu***** kidding?
Final word: please, keep a good documentation on version requirements 😁
(The package has currently a 3.x in beta to solve the 2.1 angular 14 problem because why not 🤷) -
friend : bro which phone may I buy?
me : mi / honor
next day
f : bro are you sure?
m : yup pretty sure ,in your budget this 2 are best phone
after 3-4 day
*call*
f : bro I buy phone.
m : congo , which pne ?
f : oppo f9
o(╥﹏╥)o5 -
Ok so riddle me this. The service for an application were required to run to send clients insurance through (as per government regulations) was working fine all day working super fast. Rare but awesome. I get a call one hour prior to the office closing (I don't work weekdays) and I am told that all of a sudden insurance isn't sending.
My mind goes right to this fu**ing process. Sure enough it's stopped on the server. Well shit ok. I click start..... Nothing. I kill it from task manager.... Nothing. "SERVICE CAN'T START"
I'm like ok that's fine let's check event logs.... Nothing. No problem let's just run it not in a service container and see if there's an error. NOPE IT DOESNT LET ME.
Okok so that's cool let's just try reinstalling the app. NOPE CAN'T DO THAT WITHOUT RESTARTING THE WHOLE FUCKING SERVER WHICH BRINGS THE ENTIRE OFFICES MANAGEMENT SYSTEM OFFLINE BECAUSE THIS FUCKING APP NEEDS TO BE ON THE SAME GODDAMN SERVER.2 -
Soo... Let me get this straight... My boss reeeeeeally wants me to reconfigure our database system to sync data between each of our 15 sites... Let me this about this...
Our database is an MS Access database originally written about 17 years ago. It was written as a standalone database that runs a unique instance for each of our sites.The person responsible for the database (still not the original developer) before I took over 6 years ago bragged about how they were "an 80s developer" (w...t...f!). Even with all of the fixes and additions (additions because... F&$#ing of course there are!) It's still basically held together by duct tape and spit.
Hmmm... Ok, still possible. What's the environment I'm working in... I have absolutely ZERO control of our workplace network... That's a whole other department. Due to the nature of the workplace (and it's sites) there is extreme limitation on network access.
Well... If I'm Reeeeeeally nice to the people in charge of the network, maaaaaybe they can give me access to a little server space.
A very long shot, but, doab.... Oh, the boss would really like this handled in the next couple months...
F$#k you! There is no way on God's (still) green earth that I... Alone... Can rewrite a legacy database... written across 4 or 5 different versions of FU$KING MS Access, and give 15 sites, with extremely limited networking, real time data sync in... Oh, a few months.
Now, I do not work with "computer people". I'm usually lucky when my coworkers remember their passwords (which, even if they don't, WHY tell ME! I don't run the network!)
And when I tell my boss basically what I just said... In a nice, pleasant way... They suggest I'm not giving the problem enough thought...
FU#K YOU IGNORANT ASS! Write me a ToDo list in MS Access (no, I'm not going to tell you where to start) in under an hour then, MAYBE, we can talk about... No... Just NO... Can't be done!
*Takes deep breath* so... Lovely weather we're having, right?3 -
so the jokers at my office facilities bought in an expensive coffee machine which has it's dedicated iPad that doesn't have any options for my fu*** latte4
-
trying to login fb
username : ...........
pass : ...................
without thinking just type that pass
error changed pass 2 year back
again try to remember same password
:(
unable to remember1 -
I just couldn't let this one go.
See if you can figure out JO's message to facecunt
(made with gimp/gap)
4 -
School made me a stickler for the Linux kernel coding conventions in regards to the C language. And even though I shouldn't feel bothered by reading other coding styles.....i still get annoyed.
I try not to get irked cuz I find it a small thing to get annoyed at.... but i still do.....bad.
And even then i dislike how there is not padding inside of funcion parametes
void
fu(int here, int there) {}
Should be
void
fu( int here, int there ) {}
That space man...its needed.
Man this is such a small thing to be annoyed at..3 -
Have a issue to deliver today, Xcode start to act weird...
Ok let's just quit Xcode and open again...
"Xcode can't be opened while updating"
Fuck no! Who gave you permission for that, stop! Stop!
Hmm.... boss won't like this9 -
ATTN: ALL DEVZ
I think we all should just band together and say FU! to all of these software companies and form one gigantic software corporation, steal all of their clients, and make them beg on their knees for us to help them. Not only that, make them go through a series of VERY stressful interviews (to see who deserves our time, of course) in which we simply say....."no" with no explanation. Bwahahahahhahahaha!!!
Wishful thinking.... 🤔4 -
toilet.flusher.show()
... hmm ... not a UI issue.
toilet.flush()
Crash: "No function found"
... must be private, mother fu**** ...
...
...
// ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
user.leaveFloater(true)
1 -
[Not dev related but...] My boss is busy and not around, and the colleague is bossing me around like he's my boss :/ You're not my boss!
-
Windows piece of shit mother fucker useless trash.
Why can't I just compile without the dumb ass "Antimalware Service Executable" having to check every single fucking file and eating fucking 4GB ram. God damn it. fiadsfleaf oaiehjf afpo jafj
I start compiling binutils and then the whole thing fucking crashes ad;adsfjhc odshfaj;sdl hfja;odsfh;osa dhif;aosdhfi a;osdihf;skdjnvba; dsjch;soduf;dsao fu;nodjf ;anaod11 -
Ok, I didn't know that Wireshark on Windows can fuck-up your network routing :D Try to send anything to 255.255.255.255 broadcast and see that nothing happens, yay :D
-
Fuck apple, and fuck xcode.
Making and running android app was a breeze.
Making and running ios app was hell.
Expectation : I should have gotten everything I need just by installing xcode and flutter.
Reality : I need to install these from the terminal : xcode command line tools, homebrew, ruby, cocoapods, firebase-cli. Also I need to manually add many stuffs, such as google login url into xcode project settings. Also we can simply test run our app or install to our device, and iphone we owned, we need to register in apple developer program, fill a full form, blah blah blah.
When it comes to android, I only need to register an account much much later, when I want to publish it to the playstore.5 -
Meeen fvck this shit. After my student loan I’m out in this shit ass company men.
So I’m fixing a frontend bug. I’m so into it that I opened more than 10 tabs. So i called my senior on what I found then he want to test something on my workstation so i said im cool with it and then i closes all the TABS man. Comeon!!
Ps: the tabs are sequentially opened to track the bug.12 -
My job in company to developed e-commerce website as a full stack developer.
History of that project.
Company paid 300,000 INR to the local web development firm for developing previous website and they developed website without bootstrap/SSL/Even save information of high profile client in plain text.
I am not angry on that web firm ,I am laughing on my company because such client never trust on independent developers who work hard ,code day and night to complete freelancing projects.
I hope my work will make differnce in their selling. -
Unable to access cpanel/whm due to IP changed error.
called HR
me : please connect me to networking team (out sourced)
hr : why ?
me : I have some issue to access cpanel. I contacted to hosting comapny but it is not their fault so may be it's our network issue.
hr : explain me in details.
me : ok
from morning I am trying to access whm because our website is out of bandwidth limit and showing 509 error ,I contacted to hosting comapny but they explained me problem from our side. SO i wanted to talk with network team about this issue because I am not using any proxy or vpn even my tor browser is off too still ip chaged error giving frustation. second reason I am frusted that my public IP and private IP is not chaged.
one more your windows pc freeze 3 times from morning.
do you need in detailed technical reason why I want to talk with them.
hr : no no no *hang up*
after 2 minute *my landline ring*
hr : network engineer on other side.
fair enough2 -
I’m not a web programmer; I’m an application and SQL developer. So when I’m tasked with scrapping a web site for an ETL feed, I thought it would just be a ton of substring and Post/Get calls.
Nope! There is this garbage called JBOSS.A4J where the page isn’t a page but a bunch of files that are merged together and then it isn’t “real” but like a bunch of Photoshop layers that “look” like a page. JavaScript functions based on key press and things like Select/Option that looks like an element but Selenium/PhantomJS (C#) can’t find it. Or my Google-Fu isn’t working. -
Here’s a snippet of code that I found in our production codebase. I found this while fixing a bug. This is not part of the bug though but I see this a problem. Should I say this to my senior that his logic is off here?
First he doesnt have to do explicitly strict comparison since the return type is boolean and it could be true or false. Also the returnUrl will alway be undefined because redirectIfUserLoggedIn is called first before it was set.
He dosent like me. Hell get mad for sure. I think ill let this go.
37 -
Me installing software:
>Downloads installer
>Runs installer
>"Software installed, must reboot"
>Reboots computer
>Opens program
>"Not the latest version, must update"
>Uhm, ok then
>Click ok
>Update dialogue pops up
>Click next
>"Program is already open, please close program"
>Ok Fu
>Closes program
>Commences update
>"Update complete, must reboot"
Please kill me3 -
Yey I got a raise. From 55,000 to 56,500 annually. Go Junior me! Hahahaha. Not enough for California though but I’m grateful.10
-
Reason to hate my D grade engineering college.
1st lecture of web development.
(Syllabus html,css,PHP)
Expectation : at least teacher will introduce fucking web development technologies.
Reality:
Teacher=> look I don't know anything about PHP so learn from web. I will give you internal marks just submit assignment on time.
😅
Btw it is not story.3 -
Fucking unreal bro!!! I’m working on an issue and I pushed, then there was a bug, i fixed it again, another issue for the UI change, another fixed for sorting column. All that fixed I created separate branch. My boss called me and told me im stupid for creating a separate branch everytime on a simple fix, he told me that Git isnt used that way. He told me that his been doing this 30years already. So I asked isnt it the best practice to create a separate branch on every issue or if the branch has been merged? His answer is no. Fuck this guy and his 30years experience
I should’ve responded:
First of all, if we have a test suite then I would have notice that error but we dont. You dont even want to upgrade ruby and rails. We’re stuck at version 4 on rails. Second why are you merging my MR and reviewing it on IST? Why didnt you do that locally so you can address the issue before you merged? Third fuck you and your 30years
My actual response is:
Ahh yes sir, im sorry wont happen again, my bad, sorry for that mistake.
Fuck bro im mad!!!!4 -
Sitting here in Brazil watching everyone getting their stickers and knowing it will take at least 4 months to receive mine... 😬😤😒😓😓😭😭9
-
Ok so I'm am a black end kind of guy and have had to deal with making our site again and again and again and fu#@ing again.
Who the hell thought up using SVG icons. My first look at it today and I'm not sure if I hate it or love it. Any thoughts?9 -
started with
printf("Hello World... It's 2010")
Journey to
cout
println
Document.write
echo
Stayed at
try:
print('hey there...')
except:
print('got issue.... Fu#k this bug')
pass -
Sneaking a JavaScript code to open Kung fu panda scadush scene on logout :D never actually got merged to main branch (nor I would allow it) but got all the team giggling
-
What the fuck! Sick of this shitty build system we have. Apparently once you have used it too many times the same way, a bug kicks in. So you rhn another of their shittty tools to "update" and now it says you have no buildtools. Aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!!! Fu&#! Fu&#! Fu&#! Fu&#! F f f fuuuuuuuuu&#!
-
Make someone create a shitload of tests for your shitty code, then don't give a shit when your commit break almost everything, finally; make the guy who wrote the tests figure your shit out.
Bonus points: Whine about something that's been broken for weeks "without you knowing" when the test suites have been saying exactly that since your commit.1 -
Little story.
Manager give me task, Send mail through mail chimp to many groups and schedulled them differntly.
Day1 : it litterly waste my half hour.
Night 1 :create script using Selenium (utilize my 2 hours because It was new for me.)
Day 2 : I am devrant. (script is doing my task)
Manager is also happy that I am doing extra work. -
Why the fuck would you want to use a .tt on a web.config file?!
What about they keys you don't want to be mandatory? And you want to set some defaults for them if they're not present in the web.config file?!
I mean WTF?! Am I missing something here?!
Or is it really just that you wanted to be cool and have a file that writes some more code in another file in your project?!
Fuck!!1 -
I feel lucky to be a developer.
yes just keep frustrating hours of debugging and other boring stuff aside for a moment.
I love to solved physical problem with digital solutions, I worked as a full stack developer in company using same skills to earn money by doing freelancing.
while my other non techie friends are crying for extra income, I earn enough in freelancing to pay my rent and other stuff
😍😍😍😍2 -
AI has developed a lot since its inception. I think AI is the fu....ck you.
oops, it wasn't me. AI did that.3 -
one more time, I proud of my team and MD too.
XYZ is our office boy. He completed his BSc IT from 3rd Grade college due to family condition and lack of knowledge, he has to work as an office boy.
So my team decided to teach him web development. We are starting it from very basic. We get total 1:30 hours of a lunch+snack's break so each one of us will give 1-day to teach him but It is not free. We will need good coffee in this deal. Our MD like this idea and promised us that once we gave him a green signal. He can do his first internship here. -
I was waiting in a queue for Adobe support for over an hour, decided to go for a smoke. I come back, and a representative had entered the chat and closed it because I didn't reply within like 2 minutes ... FU
-
#TIL that you can navigate part of your Linux commands with CTRL like CTRL+A gets you to the beginning of the typed command, CTRL+D deletes the forward command and CTRL+E gets you to the end of the typed command.
NONE OF THIS WAS FOUND IN ANY LINUX-FU LESSONS! THESE WERE WAY EASIER TO USE THAN USING THE ARROW KEYS GODDAMMIT!2 -
Strangermeet up conversation
Stranger: m22
Me: just sleep bro ,u can't get girl here.
Stranger : can't sleep R8 now, reading quantum computing book.
Me : interesting
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Yes we are now friends (#~#) -
Searching new laptop / system on current laptop / system can hurt feelings of it.
It's same as asking gf which is better girl than you 😂😂😂😂2 -
just realize, I have not talked face to face with anybody in a whole day
(little conversation on phone and chat)
total of 8 peoples in my office room including me and 30 + in the whole office.
that means either every device working properly in office or it's my luckiest day.4 -
I've kept training to those dumbfucks how this damn app works... Now they ask for a MANUAL, a fu****g PICTURE BOOK... INCLUDING PICTURES on how to confirm a fu*** email!!! How do you even live without brain at all?! Should i put a picture of a computer in it so these dumbfucks dont type on empty desk... JESUS!!!4
-
Semi-colons(;), ruining lives, relationships and careers since 1995.
Because, what else could make you want to hit your boss with a keyboard?2 -
Let me rant! I don’t usually do this but this is just frustrating and draining. Please tell me if im wrong. We have authentication that needs to be refactored. I was assigned on this issue. Im a junior btw. I also attached an image of my proposals. The issue of the old way of our signup process is that when validation fails they will keep on accepting the TaC (terms and conditions) and on our create method we have the validation and creating the user. Basically if User.create(user_params) create else throw invalid end. (Imma take a photo later and show it you)which needs to be refactored. So I created a proposal 1. On my first proposal I could create a middleware to check if the body is correct or valid if its valid show the TaCs and if they accept thats the moment the user is created. There is also additional delete user because DoE told me that we dont need middlewares we have before and after hooks! (I wanted to puke here clearly he doesn’t understand the request and response cycle and separation of concerns) anyway, so if middleware is not accepted then i have to delete the user if they dont accept the TaCs. Proposal 2. If they dont want me to touch the create method i could just show the TaCs and if they dont accept then redirect if they do then show form and do the sign process.
This whats weird (weird because he has a lot of experience and has master or phd) he proposes to create a method called validate (this method is in the same controller as the create, i think hes thinking about hooks) call it first and if it fails then response with error and dont save user, heres the a weird part again he wants me to manually check on each entity. Like User.find_by_email(bs@g.com) something like that and on my mind wtf. Isnt it the same as User.create(user_params) because this will return false if paras are invalid?? (I might be wrong here)
This is not the first time though He proposes solutions that are complex, inefficient, unmaintainable. And i think he doesnt understand ruby on rails or webdev in particular. This the first time i complained or I never complained because im thinking im just a junior and he hs more experience and has a higher degree. This is mot the case here though. I guess not all person who has a higher degree are right. To all self thought and bachelors im telling you not all people who went to prestige university and has a higher degree are correct and right all the time. Anyway ill continue later and do what he says. Let me know if im wrong please. Thanks
4 -
Went to meet up last night. I was there acting like I have no experience and was just starting to learn programming. Suddenly this guy turns and faced me he said non verbatim “don’t use JavaScript thats the worst programming language, its used by wanna be software engineer. Use c# they have blazor so you wont have to code using JS”. My blood pressure went up guys. I understand this because hes kinda old and dont want to learn new things but i got caught off guard. To be honest im not mad, im just sad though, imagine if i was really new and had no experience and just started few months ago. All the hard work and studying will be nothing. Btw hes nice he offered me free food and beer its just JS.
If you’re learning any language specifically JS. Dont mind the naysayers. Just learn it and be good at it. Languages has its use cases. Conversation with whats better programming language is useless and a waste of time thats what my professor said and its true.15 -
Hi. I just wanted to share I failed the google online interview. Thought I was prepared, I vomit and had diarrhea 30mins before the interview, Always makes mistakes on google docs. I keep pressing tabs which uglifies the code, miss-spelled my variables and functions name, mistakenly put everything in const (I got used to my editor yelling at me when I used const instead of let, should not rely on this). But there's always next time. I hope.6
-
Need to use new module or pattern:
1. Read the online documentation
2. Have no fu*kin clue what I just read
3. Try for 2 hours and fail.
4. Go home and sleep
5. Wake up at 3am from a fever dream with the solution to the problem
6. Go to work and implement it in 10 min
I guess I learn when I sleep -
"Guys best idea to fuc... help the javascript developers. We make a framework with its own events/states and it will not change inputs or anything unless specified in state. Clearly easier to test... I mean how hard can it be?
Even better our framework will be so fuc... Helpfull that they will put an plugin so they can make it work... I mean improve...
Did i say we just throw the html and put everything in our own butchered way? Even better remember that easy
, Style= ? Hahaha we will make it an object...
O yeah and the state must be immutable objects... What immutable means? Who the fu... I mean its easy...
And we make our own virtual dom because... Fu browsers"
-Facebook developer who hates javascript probably
P.S: thanks vue for keeping the double binding.2 -
Why are the damned Spaniards so small? Because of them I am unable to sit in the newer trains that go around the Netherlands. The angled headrests (they are supposed to kinda wrap around the head). But these headrests start below my shoulders and my head then floats above the headrest. This causes my shoulders to be folded together.
FU you spaniards (no offense to everyone who didn't design trains), if you can't take in consideration what the average length of the users is you have failed as a product designer.
Yes I am tall (1.95m) but not really above average around here (maybe a cm or so)18 -
I'm helping my teammates with the problems that they face in debugging an issue or fixing a Dev environment.
Sometimes ppl go too flexible and ask for my Dev VM. The help I have to offer is tell them cause of an issue and tell them the fix that they have to give. What the fu*k they do? What did they gain as experience all these years.
Ppl don't know how to make draft commits. They can't fix but failures. They don't know anything.
They just sit at office and age as it is their only job.
Seniors take so much salary. Why don't they feel bad that they are not doing justice to their work. -
I swear.
I will find the person who realized the category-management and the arrangement of items inside Woocommerce.
And when I'll find you, I'll make you change all the categories inside every single fu***n item.1 -
Sometimes I wonder if actors who play wizards or superbeings feel stupid waving their hands for CG lightning bolts
Then I remember all the kung fu poses and punches and shrieks I do when I solve a hard bug -
Anybody know any other file based database technologies like sqlite besides sqlite? Struggled to find any if they exist, my google-fu sucks19
-
Java with it's new DriverManager, but I'm still sitting here and using Class.forName() 'cause the new fancy DriverManger can not fu***ng find the damn driver! 😡😠🤷4
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Wrote a new article "Kung Fu Java". Hopefully useful for beginners and entertaining for all.
https://solothought.com/tutorial/...3 -
sitting alone on my desk for 5 fu****g days making my agency's landing page. Replaced all lorem shit ipsum with my feelings. Pray for my lazy co-workers
3 -
How the fu k do I remove this shit?! I can't find the fucking package name. Big hint: IT'S NOT FIRE!!!
7 -
2 min silence for my friend.
who got contract to edit and make golden frame of "naga baba"
he have to zoom each and every part of naga baba to clear and make render image.
xD XD16 -
The moment when you just wanna fetch data from instagram API and they ask for "Instagram User Experience Video" for permissions. #FU Facebook #FU Instagram
-
Hey read this. This shit is funny. HAHAHA
I was fixing a bug right. The bug was throwing InverseOfAssociationNotFoundError in our rails admin page when deleting a user. So the director of engineering called and we had an argument because he was insisting that the error InverseOfAssociationNotFoundError is OUR IMPLEMENTATION. HAHAHAHAHA. my goodness. I showed him that the error comes from the constraints when deleting a user. A table has no relation to the user table but my senior added it anyway for some reason. I was mad and laughing at the same time because I showed him the documentation and the simple fix. These idiot keep flexing his 30 years of experience. HAHAHA3 -
Senior: “we can go remote now, but you have to report what you did at the end of the day. Ex: 7am clock in work on bla bla to 10am. 10am -12nn still working on bla bla. Til end of day.”
What a crap. Now I don’t want to work remote with this bunch of reports at the end the day. Some bullshit in here.3 -
Men fo real! I dont rant so much because I think its a negative attitude but let me do it anyway! Listen. My boss boss told me to create a dynamic drop which I did. A backend request then display it on the frontend which is easy, then on code review he ask why do we need this error handling. Bruh as soon as I heard that question, I got covid. Bitch we do need that error handling because if theres error on requests it will set to default options, but I didn’t say anything tho. I just ask what will happen if there’s an error?, he said I don’t think a simple request will respond error if you did it right. Then I agreed and remove the code. Hot damn! Mind you guys. When they started the app there are no test code. 0, nada, nothing inside the spec folder.7
-
I just did *skadoosh* while executing command to run multiple docker containers with docker-compose and pressing the Enter (Return) key with my pinky finger.
Feels like real-life Kung Fu Panda trying to do a Wuxi Finger Hold.
I bet you will never forget this when you're running a command on laptop and pressing enter with pinky finger.3 -
Hey Devranter's from mumbai
Why not we meet somewhere in Mumbai?
Please tag other ranter's in comment Who are from Mumbai.
@Floydian17 -
Wait, I HAVE to use double quotes when referring to RiotJS tags within JS, otherwise the in-browser compiler just spits out errors? FU
-
I used mint, Ubuntu,Kali but now I want to change my Linux flavour.
My work is mostly on backend development (PHP, MySQL).
Which one may I try next?
(All previous Linux are f9 for me I just want to use new distro)3 -
So basically
-I have a project to finish due next week from an interview i had and i mentioned that i want a server side role, i am more of a PHP & MySQL (laravel).
-Also told them i am not very good at the front end
-So good so far
-They gave me the requirements
-BUILD A FU##ING website using
{
- BOOTSTRAP AND WORDPRESS
}
two let's call them tools i have NEVER used and also mentioned that
So here i am having my fking pulse over 100 trying to damn figure out how this bs works.
End my suffering
Have a nice day!!8 -
So i need about a half a yearly budget of some smaller EU state to try out everything on AWS, a fu***g satellite ground station for example... I don't know why should i do with it but i need it2
-
Am a developer I write Python,php and java. .. I joined a telecoms company in my country which is not doing well as opposed to the other 2 telecoms. One reason is that its a government entity And always keep making bad decision which no one take responsible of. .. always good at making bad decision
My previous boss (who just left) conrned me to support a Chinese Software called mobile money full of bugs. And does not do wat they sad it could do in the FRS . . Doccumentation is mess. There a language barier with the support team. .. then there a guy who seem to have temper and looks overworked by Chinese.
I love writing code and learning new stuff
And progressing in my career
But I cant do that if am answering a call every fu*king sec. We are not appreciated as a team by both the business and CTIO even tho we are only the only two engineers in the Dept. .. its sickens me
I dont no what to do now.that my imediate boss is gone to another company . . What thing to do -
latest alexa certification experience
them: you must not name your skill like this, this and that.
me: ok. please certify my skill named a not listed option.
them: YoU mUsT nOt NaMe It ThIs EiThEr.
for real, if i would have to do alexa skills for a living i'd long have gone mad (well, madder)
sincerely fu3 -
This got me fucked up. Listen yo.
So we have this issue on our modal right. The issue keeps poppin. It's a hotfix because its in prod. So my senior and I were on it. After a few hours, I showed him the part of the code that is buggy. It's 50 lines of code of nested if-else, else-if. And so we're still fighting it. He redid everything since we're using angular2 he did a subject, behavior-subject all that bs and I was still trying to understand what's the bug, because it's happening on the second click and so I did my own thing and found the cause bug and showed it to him, its this:
setTimeout( () => {}, 0)
the bootstrap-modal doesn't allow async inside it (I dont why, its in the package). So he explained to me why it's there. So I did my own thing again and find a workaround which I did, a one-line of angular property, showed it to him he didn't accept it because we'll still have to redo it with subjects and he was on it. I said ok. Went back to my previous issue. The director came in and ask for a fixed, my senior came up to me and told me to push my fix. Alright no problem. So we good now. Went back to our thing bla bla bla, then got an email that we will have a meeting, So we went, bla bla bla. The internal team wants a support for mobile, senior said no problem bla bla bla, after the meeting he approaches me and said (THIS IS WHERE IT GOT FUCKED UP) we wont be supporting bootstrap4 anymore because of the modal issue and since we're going to support mobile and BOOTSTRAP4 grid system is NONINTUITIVE we are moving to material design because the grid system is easier. I was blown away man. we have more than 100 components and just because of that modal and mobile support shit he decided to abandon bootstrap. Mater of fact its the modal its his code. I'm not expert in frontend but I looked at the material design implementation its the same thing other than the class names. OHHH LAWD!3 -
Update:
I've been trying to leave DoD for a couple of months now. Translating my 10 year's experience with complex Intelligence enterprise level systems to something relatable to the civilian IT world. Grabbed a few certs to help out A+, network+ and security+ with Linux+ as my next target. Photos of me working on unclassified systems, radios, cell towers and servers. I'm a teacher for military UAS so this shouldn't be to hard to get even a basic job in IT right.
No one will hire...
Linux admin: Nope
Network admin: Nope
Assistant Network admin: Nope
IT call service: Nope
Pool cleaner fucking nope
Many interviews and nothing
I'm broke and sold all of my personal valuables. I can't hold out much longer and really looking at becoming homeless. But I'm kinda ok with it, one last payment on my apartment and car is all I can do now. My parents think I'm in Afghanistan working a six figure job lol
DoD: we see you're trying to leave we'll pay you alot to teach A+, Network+ and Security+ traveling all across the country and staying at hotels with all expenses paid.
FU FU FU I want out please tell me someone has a job, I'll be a janitor of a server room Idc I just want out. Fuck the pay
I start Tuesday...4 -
How can people stand this bitten apple? With this mojave update I now feel in the most unfriendly desert for developers.
Not only did your update render all my VM's unusable, but the new AppStore seems a joke. This new icon there if a piece is downloading or installing or whatever. I cannot tell what it should tell me. That an alien took a crap on my display? There's no percentage, nothing indicating what's actually happening. Is this your understanding of user experience through obscurity? - shunning the user from any useful information, hiding everything behind some nice looking vapourware?4 -
Me doing ops analysis...
Day1: No way! How the fu
Day2: Nah, someone else will do this...
Day3: Fuck! Why dont we have a Legal Dept
Day4: Okay Im just gonna run an ml to find irregularities
Day5: These scans cannot be ocr-ed...
Day6: br-brute force
2 months later: so there's a problem regarding the Express Contractual Remedies of Contract A and Amendment C... -
Ok its been an hour now trying to find a way to push a NEW commit to a MERGED branch. SMH! Help gitlab!7
-
Any hardcore vim users out there? In need of help with tabs/panes. I tried some google-fu, but not much help.
I have a kubernetes helper, where I can run a command like :Vikube, and it'll open the result in a new tab. Is there any way I can open the result in a splitpane instead? I've found some ways, but not any good ways :/4 -
Fu google, y u removed zoom buttons from google maps? It's so annoying when I have to use my whole hand just to operate your fckin maps...
5 -
can you share some interesting and useful topics for a web developer(PHP), who want to become nodejs based full stack developer?
udemy courses link will be useful.2 -
Nework engineers wannabe developers. They write static shit and duplicate codes, so they have everything in control.
fu=ck you mofo1 -
follow up from https://devrant.com/rants/2377758/...
As theKarlisK and Root stated "When it works it works beautifully, when it doesn't a bit of Google-fu finds a fix".
some issues I found in this journey:
- stuttering in some games, even using custom proton build(halo mcc)
- some titles are hard to even start(my RE7 D:)
- bluetooth with my dongle isn't good, takes to long to connect my xbox s controller, sometimes with doesn't even work at all. had to do a workaround in the first place to pair (but this is a problem with ubuntu, not linux gaming but had to mention it)
- games outside the proton ecosystem can be a pain in the ass to get working. LoL on lutris crashes 3 times at startup, don't wanna even try to install overwatch on lutris
- rbg software can be "hard" to find or the alternative is not that good. (got an alternative for mystic light but is just command line. did not found a logitech keyboard software :/, hadn't search hard enough )
pros:
- being able to game on linux is like a dream come true
- most of my steam games runs out of the box
- is linux
- is linux
but the issues are starting to bother me...5 -
Reluctantly thinking of switching to a PM role so i could focus all my code-fu to my side projects!!
what do u guys think? i know most of us hate PMs, but they do get paid more for what i think is less work (mental focus wise).
😞😞😞2 -
Pgadmin4 error: could not connect to server
Tried to delete data from pgadmin folder but didn't worked for me2 -
Hello devrant,
Need guidance about QR code based coupon system.
In my restaurant I sale few food items. My 50+ customer bought food daily (on delivery). They are asking me for coupon system like I sale one sandwich for half 30 INR , they bought 3-4 per day.
So they can buy coupon of 100 sandwich on every delivery my delivery boy will scan QR code of customer and their sandwich count will decrease accordingly.
This will apply for every food item.
Can you suggest me current software for this.1 -
Meeeen this is crazy. The director created a testing route inside the actual api controller instead inside the spec file. Common man. We better than this. 🤦🏻♂️2
-
!DEV
As some of you (I'm certain), I have a plex server at home. Hosted with an "old" core i5-4670K, 16GB ram, no GPU. (Ubuntu 20).
My question. HOW, HOW THE FUCK :
I can play HDR and DV videos via plex TV app.
I can play HDR via my S10 fucking phone !
I cannot play nor HDR nor DV since last update on Xbox X... It's the ONLY use I have for that console. If my TV can do better, wtf I'm supposed to do with that console ? (Any way to put plex server on it ?)
My friend can play my 4k HDR video on apple TV via remote connexion..
What's wrong with Xbox X ?
RHAAAAA.
Also, FU all ripers using PGS format for subtitles without SRT option.
Also FU sony for not allowing TrueHD via ARC. (AT least on my A/V reciver)
Also fuck me for buying xbox.
Also fuck the worl just because.
Ok, I feel better. Thanks you all.4 -
Sometimes I'm questioning all my skills... I have a maven based project which uses hibernate as OGM to the mongo database. Everything working fine and already in a productive environment.
Now I changed some lines of code at the business logic to adjust for the changed database model. So far so good.
After compiling and running on the test environment: exception! "no persistence provider for Entity Manager named xy" are you fu***** kidding me? I changed nothing at that point! -
can 2 modal which is static have a race condition error? I’m trying to fix a bug and when I showed it to my senior , I said maybe because of the first modal the style is not being applied on the second modal he then said “it might be a race condition” and I almost choked on my own saliva.
Ps: the first modal will show a loading text and a gif after that the second modal shows with some data.
I got confused how he think that it might be a race condition. We’re not doing webworks on the front end. Weird.2 -
@highlight
disabled: Set<string> = new Set();
@highlight
<input
class="form-control"
id="pushBack"
type="text"
[attr.disabled]="disabled.has('pushBack') ? ' ' : null"
[(ngModel)]="local.pushBack"
/>
---
Do you know what's wrong with this code? If you know and you are a junior how would you tell this to your super boss without hurting his feelings?7 -
Fuck treehouse ads , six week , what the hell dudes are u fu##$%% teaching HTML modayakers , just be honest not everyone is cutout to this field dumies
-
Fighting for an hour explaining how a query wouldn't return the data he wanted...turns out it did...but really not sure how... FU Access!
-
Today my coisinhas asked me to remove a ad virus from her computer and the bad thing este is that is at programming at fu***** university and it is even worst when she sad that none of her friends could fix the fu***** problem!!! I just did it in 5 min by searchin in the web!!!!4
-
Electronjs "framework to developed cross platform desktop application but not able to install in Ubuntu😢"6
-
Hey devrant buddies,
I wanna learn AR development,
I am react developer,
May I go with viroAR or suggest something from your side4 -
Ok Google. Thank you for providing a sample app to take a picture. Also, FU for making the basic sample camera 2 fragment in excess of 1000 lines of code.
-
I realise this might not be the place but does anyone know of a simple diagram JS library I can use where I can just simply drop the relevant files in a html/php file on an apache server and not have to install <package manager>, set up a <js server software> and be forced into pulling a million dependancies because the devs couldn't do something as simple as pad a string?
My Google-fu is weak today.7 -
Office Politics
I suppose I become a victim of office politics. I was working on new project and one more new project having e-commerce aspects was in queue. But my ex-manager went to the boss and asked him to assign me to her :( No more chance to work on e-commerce :( again have to work some geo-location services. Feel like fu*ked up ..2 -
looking for someone with experience with:
react-native, firebase and iOS.
Mainly iOS, im really stuck and i could use a little help, my google fu has reached its limit for this.. -
Today there is milk for cereal, tomorrow.... there is nothing? Wtf do you people do? Inhale the fu#& stuff? 28 1L cartons a day wtf!!!!!!!!
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