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Search - "fml"
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Working with a team of interns, pointed out a bunch of unit tests are failing, they said they would take care of it.
10 mins later they opened a pull request to delete the tests that were failing.
fml, fml, fml, fml ... and ... oh yeah fml10 -
The first time I use devrant, I thought "fml" is some kind of new generation markup language, like "HTML" or "XML". Until I become too curious to look for "fml" in the internet.
So, I make this and leave it here as reference for future generation...20 -
Friend: Hey, can you fix my laptop? The hard drive is almost full.
Me: (Looking through his folders) Maybe it's because of this. Why do you have 3000+ files in your downloads folder? Maybe I should delete some of this.
Friend: No no, please don't touch the downloads folder, I have some very important documents there.
Me: Why don't you move them to a separate folder then? You should organize the ones you actually need and delete the rest. This folder is a complete mess.
Friend: No no, the problem is not the downloads folder, there must be something else. Can't you just uninstall some programs to free up space?
Me: I could, but I don't know which ones you actually use.
Friend: What? You should know!! You studied computer science for this!!
Me: First of all, there is not a single class in the whole 4 years of university called "How to uninstall programs and free up space on 128GB hard drives of shitty €400 computers". Second of all, I don't know why you were expecting me to find a magic button on your laptop that immediately frees up all the space in a hard drive without actually deleting anything. That's not how computers work, you know.
Friend: Hey if you didn't want to help me you could have said so in the first place.
Me: FML20 -
Me when viewing a line of PHP where the previous developer add "sleep(5)" to an Ajax endpoint with the comment "Sleep for 5 seconds so the ajax loading icon is visible to users".
FML.12 -
My college internet sucks!
It was totally fine upto when they blocked facebook and other social networking sites. 😕
Then they blocked youtube! 🤧 Ok, that was fine too!
But now they've blocked Stack Overflow! WTF!! 😭😭
This is the biggest punishment for any computer engineering student.
And there's no one to complain about it!😡😡 They've also blocked Ubuntu forums and several other helping sites! And they expect us to code without using these helpers. FML49 -
Story.
Did you know logging into chrome will auto sync all your fucking bookmarks to that other person's account??
I DIDN'T!!
(I use Firefox mainly and chromium for testing.)
I use chrome only for porn. Got shit tons of bookmarks. I login to my friend's sister Gmail on my chrome(for remote desktop - to help fix her computer. Somehow,remote desktop doesn't work on chromium)
Was browsing her pc via remote session and suddenly all of my porn bookmarks appear at the top bar.)
Had to manually select each bookmark in the bookmark manager and delete since CTRL+A won't work during the remote session. Don't know why.
FML.27 -
This dude is using 4 screens for work. When I asked for another screen at work,
I can't convince my boss for 2, FML
To the dude who got 4 screens, congratulations, and sorry I used your image without permission. BTW
You lucky bastard15 -
1. Find bug
2. Try 3 methods of fixing
3. All fail
4. Tell yourself you're trying for the LAST time then you'll go on to something else
5. End up trying 5 more times
6. Repeat step 4 20 times
7. Cry
8. Finally take a break
9. Return next day, try another method, it works instantly
FML!6 -
CAN SOMEBODY STOP THE TIME FOR A WHILE!!!
I HAVE TOO MUCH TO DO AND TOO LITTLE TIME!!!
FML!
PS. WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING IN DEVRANT?4 -
So I gave this guy access to a database and phpMyAdmin and then I get this:
Him: hello??? i cant make databases i have no privilages
Me: Use tables instead of databases...
Him: I need to make databases
Me: Why?
Him: 1. my votes plugin 2. my ftop plugin 3. my forums 4. my new forums 5. my new forums (he runs a minecraft server fml)
Me: You don't need databases for all of those, you can use tables, that's a massive waste
Him: idc i would rather have databases
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!8 -
Collegue *yells through the office*:
Hey IT-guy the file is not there, where is it ?
Me: what file is not where ?
Collegue: you know that file i've been searching for 30 mins now on the Google drive.
Me: Have you tried hitting the name into the search bar ?
Collegue: Sure dude, I'm not stupid.
Me -> *one the way to her desk*
Collegue: OH! never mind I found it with the search bar. I swear it hasn't been there before!
*turning around, going back to my desk*
-fml6 -
love this app.
love the new algo.
love this community.
oh... rant? this is a place to rant?
fml.
tabs. or spaces? tabs! tabs.8 -
1st post. Not sure if rant.
> Join 1st job after college.
> Desk assigned is close to a senior dev
> Random day, QA asks senior dev questions on something and coincidentally I happened to be working on the same thing.
> Senior dev borrows my system and explains qa something.
> By the end of explanation senior dev had bunch of shell commands written on notepasd on my machine.
> I don't understand jack shit of whats happening.
> QA looks at me and says, "Ping me once."
> I think, "no idea what just happened but must be something related to network ."
> I open terminal and type "ping" and quitely wait for further instructions (address to ping that is).
> Everyone starts laughing their asses off.
> QA guy opens slack, and sends himself the commands on text document.
> I realize what just happened
> Laugh awkwardly with everyone to ease the pressure
> FML7 -
Just spent the last 10-20 minutes debugging a stupid error. Turns out I spelt construct wrong. FML.14
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My OS professor just said that next week we'll be learning about bash scripts, which is fine for me except for one simple thing. We're using Windows 10 and the instructions he provided us with confirm we'll write Windows batch scripts.
I asked him about that and he shouted at me for "thinking I'm smarter than someone with a PhD in computer science".
Also the whole semester apparentyly we won't even hear about Linux, since "only hackers and some servers use it". FML.13 -
You developed a completly free and open source app that was designed to do A, and it does exactly what it should.
Review from an user (2 stars out of 5):
"I tried it and it just does A, I would prefer it did B.
Thank you, but I will look for a better option. Keep working, you have a lot of potential."
fml16 -
The moment when you realize you just ran a SQL update with a ';' before the WHERE clause............fml10
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I was assigned a girl that's new to the industry (but with a master's degree).
I had high hopes, as people told me she is quite a curious fellow. As I am just a junior Dev with 2 yrs of experience Ididn't know if I could handle her.
We started working on a project. Which was a change request for a previous project I had developed. I gave her 2 days to read and understand the functional requirements of previous project and this CR. Then explained everything too.
Then I gave here another 3 days to read the previous design document to learn how this code worked.
I asked her multiple times if she has any questions. She said she got everything. Cool.
One week goes by. We start to code the CR while she is shadowing me. I explained why we chose one of the two approaches. And why we are making any of the changes. She as usual nodded in agreement.
I asked her to create Unit test cases.
She couldn't write even one. So, I quizzed her, she knew nothing about the project! Nothing at all!
FUCK!
I wrote down the test cases in short hand and told her to document it (by reffering previous UTC). She wrote the test cases in short hand in the document. And she reused the previous document and did not even clean it out.
After fixing the document I asked her to execute them. But nope, she doesn't even know how the application flows for this project. FML.
It took her 3 days to write and test 8 test cases.
Now she is assigned to me in another project. This one is more complicated. And I gave her a function skeleton to complete. I figured that it will take me 15 minutes so let's give her a day. But nope. 3 days no progress.
I get it someone might not be quick to grasp something. But you know what grinds my gears? That even after this you act like a know it all! Fuck! For someone who hasn't worked with her she is the most dilligent developer.
How the fuck does someone survive masters and suck so bad!22 -
My laptop had a full meltdown and wouldn't turn on. It tried to start up then the screen went blank. It's happened before so I lost hope pretty quick.
Just spent the whole evening trying to fix it reinstalling windows and now I spot the problem. The HDMI is plugged in to a monitor that was off. My laptop was fine the whole time. Fml3 -
I asked collegue about status of component thru Skype (different countries, you know) and received answer he's leaving company in 8 days. FML.1
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Before i quit, they brought in a new guy and after i quit the plan was for him to replace me. The man knows next to nothing but hey...i thought i might as well help him since it's not his fault that i'm leaving and why should he suffer for it.
Fast forward to today...he pretends he knows alot, but when faced with actually doing something, he freezes and is incapable of handling a simple task.
After that he proceeds to rage at me because he doesn't think it's fair, that he needs more time (apparently 3 months don't qulify as enough) and that all his woes are somehow my doing.
Fml! Try to help someone...I'm done!4 -
Just spoke with a guy who considers himself a PC expert.
He: You can always recover your offline data from your PC, even if you burn it.
Me: You just need to remove your hard drive.
He: Even if you remove your hard disk, offline data can be recovered from from RAM memory.
Me: WTF?? * Trying to explain him that RAM is a volatile memory*
He: Yeah but you can recover it from the BIOS.
Me: r u serius right now??
And I can continue, because we've unfortunately talked for about an hour.
Why these people consider themselves experts and why the fuck do they have to teach you things that the don't know. FML5 -
Trying out react. Using npm 3.10
Error make sure you are using the latest version of node and npm
Updates npm to 5.6
It looks like you are using newly released version of npm which is not supported. #FML6 -
There's a girl in my team : smart, caring , beautiful, I have a huge crush on her. We have rotating oncall policy in team. Next week she's on call, followed by me N2N week. Yesterday she asked me : ARE YOU AFTER ME ? I was going to say : YES !!!! Do you feel the same way ? Then it hit me suddenly 😢, I just said yeah, I am !
fml 😣13 -
Just got picked up for a project. 20,000+ code base, no comments, no docs, variable names like x, xx, xxx, no function name conventions, and a mishmash of Czech, French and English class names.
I thought this job was too good to be true. #fml4 -
Friend asked me to teach him how to hack. FML.
Today friend tells me he bought a $200 course on "Ethical Hacking". Asks if he can translate those skills to "cool hacking" CTRL+C4 -
Finally figured out what FML stands for - apparently it's not "Fix my lighthouse" as urban dictionary suggests... ^^12
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I learned some fun things today!
Fun fact! A lot of things rely on python!
Fun fact! Python relys on a lot of things!
Fun fact! Updating just python and nothing else causes your entire fucking arch to break! ... Wait that's not fun. Shit!
FML.11 -
So our robotics team just got some code ready and our robots servos are reading hardware fault. Fml20
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I absolutely hate the way we are taught programming in Indian colleges.
FML #1: I'm pursuing a UG CS course, and this semester, I only had one subject of Computers, that too only 1 credit. The rest with all electronics.
FML #2: In that 1 credit course, we had to make a C++ project which had "data handling". No one cares if you build something cool or not, just that a project should have "extensive use" of data handling.
FML #3: Source code had to be >= 1000 lines. This is the only place where ADDING MORE LINES OF CODES THAN REDUCING IT is appreciated. Had to stuff my code with all kinds of comments and violating the basic principle of DRY.
So, yeah, we're fucked big time. 😥14 -
My plan:
1. Draw the logo in paper with black marker
2. Scan with the infamous printer
3. Load in GIMP
4. Edit some parts
5. Put some colors
6. Print or save as image file
7. Use everywhere
As I start to do step 2, I noticed something VERY wrong.
FML24 -
You can kill me for this...
I've one old printer and and I wanted to print some pages. So I did following steps
1. Plugged printers power cable and turned it on.
2. Connected included cable to printer.
3. Opened PDF and tried to print
4. Did step 3 for fucking 20minutes
What went wrong?
I fucking forgot to connect USB cable to my fucking laptop. FML...8 -
So I've been exporting a JSON dump of ~120GB for hours and when trying to processing it, and write it to a new file, I wrote to the same file. FML. Hours of export became 0 bytes in no time. Think its time to get some sleep.4
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When I started programming Batch Files I decided to go big and and make an Batch Program with a fully functional UI system. Just when I had finished the first menu I kept getting a "goto was unexpected at this time" or something like that. I did everything I could to see about debugging until I finally cleared my calender and spent the next week debugging. A week of debugging goes by and I see someone coding in color rather then black and white at my school. I walk up to him and ask. "What language is that?" To which he replies "Batch". I asked him how he got Notepad to be in color and he simply pointed to the top left of the screen and it said Notepad++.
I get home later that day and look up "Notepad++" and download the first thing I see. I install the .msi file and I see a language bar at the top of the screen. Set it to batch, and drag my .bat file into the program to see six of my dividers are red bars. I look this up and see there's another spacing option "echo.", I replace my current spacers with this and the whole thing starts working. Fml, that's a week I'm never gonna get back3 -
So yeah. There is some problem on production. I'm working on it for over a day, and can't make it work. The bad method is 500 lines. The method that calls it is almost 1000 lines and its class is 5k. This is the second one. FML :(16
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1. Participate in an online hackathon
2. Upload demo video to youtube
3. Submit in the last minute
4. Come back 1 hour later to see video removed due to length violation.
FML :( -
Didn't believe it till it happened to me!!
Was talking to a third year student...
Me: What languages can you code in?
Student: HTML, CSS
:/ FML
*facepalm*5 -
I was asked to mentor a new joinee.
As she is new i dont mind the bad code and offer suggestions in code reviews.
She doesn't know how to use .map, .filter and lots of other basic js stuff.
Claims she has completed work on tickets when it's clearly not completed.
I end up looking like an asshole for pointing out her incomplete work before her long leave.
Find out she's actually getting paid significantly more than me as she's an 'experienced frontend dev'.
Fml12 -
Spent an hour figuring out an ERR_NAME_NOT_RESOLVED on a fetch Post call.
Turns out I was calling locahost instead of localhost.........
Only figured it out because I zoomed in on the console output by accident.
fml1 -
Oh the irony: one of the e-banks I use, forces users to type their passwords via virtual on screen keyboard (javascript based!!!) due to security 'standards' yet in the same breath doesn't allow a user to use any other character for password besides the basic alfanum.. o.O fml4
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In approximately 9 hours I'm probably going to humiliate myself in a meeting
I was given 5 days to write a sh script.
And guess what..
I still have not started
FML...🤦♂️7 -
When your company hires a third party to develop 2.0 version of your product after doing a proof of concept... Fml
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I shared public IP of a server to a fellow software engineer. He has ssh login access to that server.
He needs private IP of the same server to run some script.
He is asking me for private IP. Did he really graduate in computer science ?
BTW, his development machine is a Linux machine.
FML.9 -
Client: i'd like to develop for this particular device named the hololens. And i want 2 of those to communicate over LAN as well (holo lense specific data)
Dev team: If you can provide us with 2 holo lenses to try some stuff out, we can do that.
Client: Well i only got one but i need that for my presentations to my clients. Can't you just research something and make it happen without the hardware?
And that is the story of how we now have to do something for hardware we do not have any of. FML.6 -
Boss: how long would it take you to make an app with this tool you have never seen before?
Me: idk, I've never used that.
Boss: OK so how long?
Me:.. Uh.. 3 weeks?
Boss: you got 2 weeks. Start tomorrow.
Me:... OK then..
Inner me: why does he even ask?
...Fml6 -
>Get password vom dev.
>Try to connect to MongoDB.
>Had some changes in how to connect because of Kubernetes and stuff.
>Always get authentication error.
>copy password again
>stop and restart portforwarding
>wait almost 1,5h (was lunchtime) for DevOps guy
>sit next to him and ask for help
>he unhides the password and deletes two spaces...
fml4 -
Working on a project with 2 other students. One of them makes a C# "super class" with 50 fields, and manually creates getters and setters for each and every one. Then he proceeds to write a constructor that accepts 50 parameters, because why not.
I comment on the git commit, telling him that he can just write " get; set; " in C# and that he should model the problem in smaller, more manageable classes ( this class had 270 lines and did everything from displaying data to calculating stuff). Tried to explain to him that OOP works kind of differently from how he did it.
....
His answer: "Yeah, I don't really care. If it works once, it's okay for me".
This after the most beautiful code review I have ever done...
Fml8 -
My company just announced we are leaving Slack for Google Chat because it is a "superior" (and cheaper) tool.
FML13 -
Don't you just loathe the moment when you are about to paste something you just copied, you have the text to replace all highlighted and shit...
and then you accidentally accidentally hit Ctrl-C instead...
FML4 -
So I just got let go because there was not enough work to keep me full time. Yet my manager was farming out dev work to a 3rd party developer... Fml3
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FUUUU!!!!!! 3h of colleagues work gone in sconds.. & yes, actually it is all my fault, even though I was not aware of being a totall ass at that time..
What happened?! You know the ctrl+s shortcut?! Yes? Weeeell...doesn't go well with oracle sql developer and packages.. o.O
I was totally unavare that I was typing in ctrl+s ctrl+s all the time. I know I do that with c# code.. Anyhow, when I first moved to sql developer from other tool I noticed that compile thingy.. Oooops, ok, let's remove that shortcut to not stab yourself absentmindenly and overwrite other peoples work.. OK that's taken care of, shortcuts removed and I go back to work..
It's been almost 6 months since the move & first incident and today I guess I did the same.. ctrl+s.. But this time I wasn't so lucky.
Coworker pissed off, that is not my procedure. When did you compile?! Someone overwrote my code..
Wasn't me.. Then I started thinking about ctrl+s.. OMFG!! I check this on another package, it compiled. O.o I almost died. I check the shortcuts. They are back! And even after removing them the package still compiled.. FML!! 😭😭😭😭
I removed them again & closed the tool. Reopended.. BACK!! We're back to fuck your life up!! Fuuuuuuu!!
Now I worry wtf else I fucked up without notice.. o.O hopefully not much.. I hope.. O.O boss will kill me...
BTW anyone knows how to really get rid of this feature?! Cuz for me its a bug (since I am buggy and press ctrl+s all the time.. )6 -
Just got a lection from my manager.
Today he sent me an email with request to change validation on one field validation from decimal(5,3) to int which will be 5 digit number. Ok i did that, I changed it on UI, changed validation, changed mappings, changed dtos, created migration files, and changed it in databse. After i did all of that I replied to his email and said that ive changed validation and adjusted it in database.
After my email here comes rage mail from manager with every fuckin important person in cc I kid you not. Manager is asking why the fuck did I change database when Ive could only use different validaton for that field on UI.
I Almost flipped fuckin table. What does validation good do if you wouldnt be able ti save that form? And form has like 150 fields. And if I left validation only everthing would fuckin break.
Sometimes i think that its better not to think.
FML7 -
Working on my Lenovo x1 carbon. Akku warning "less then 6%" appears. No problem, I will connect the cable just after I finished this function... "Will shutdown in a view moments" message appears. Ok, I connect the cable. Nothing happens. Maybe power adapter is broken or something more worst. Panic. Try to commit and push as fast as I can (around 2000 LOC from today, made big changes on my project today). While pushing to github laptop powers off. Fuck. Check github on smartphone to see if commits had been pushed. No. I do not have a power adapter for replacement. FML.4
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I am currently refactoring my code:
1. 200 errors
2. fixed them!!!!
3. build the solution...
4. wait for the build to complete...
5. 300 errors
6. FML5 -
- I was typing a huge rant on devrant finished my story 2000+ characters.
- filled in tags..
- And clicked on the dark part outside of the input field!
Whole story gone! FML!9 -
Instant messaging apps are a burden if your client is a b*tch.
Client: hey, I want you to put some more images on this page.
Me: Oh, okay, send them all and I will do. *provides email*
Client: Cool, will do that in an hour.
*closes facebook*
[two hours later, waiting for the email and wondering why I didn't receive it yet]
*opens facebook*
*is greeted by 45 new messages from client*
*opens to see 45 images sent one by one for me to use it on the webpage*
fml3 -
6 am, searching for the reason that put the programm in a non-responding state since 4 am. Turns out I forgot to manipulate the count variable in a while loop, so unless the first object wasn't the correct one, it hot stuck.
FML, don't programm when tired1 -
Disappointed after reading other's code written for same problem which i am writing for
FML
i am so bad programmer 🙃
I wrote almost 200 lines
And he just competed in just few lines with common logic
And i done it but used complex logic
😣😔😞
FML
Closed IDE
Shutting down PC...13 -
Me: develops my first android app with firebase by google.
Me: finishes app, tests it and it works.
Firebase after 3 months: we were first going to scale our servers on our own based on how many people are simultaneously using your app. But now fuck you, we will have a cap of 100000 simultaneous users.
Me: fuck this kills my app if it scales. Have to Shard everything on the db side and overhaul the entire app to work will multiple db instances. Takes a month.
Android after 6 months: dude your app is working fine without any hiccups. Let me fuck it up. We will stop all your services when your app is not running or backgrounded. Also we will make it illegal to start services in this case and we will throw exceptions.
Me: what the actual fuck. They now want me to focus on a JobScheduler, fine... But now even intent services won't work properly. So use a job scheduler to start a JobIntentService which is essentially another job scheduler for queuing. wtf android.
Ps solved it and works again.
PS: WAITING FOR ANDROID TO FML WITH ANOTHER NEW VERSION. Maybe they'll say you can't run your app at all now4 -
Laying in bed with a huge headache while the alpha release is at Sunday (own company) and the main feature isn't even written yet 😫 fml hard.5
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Working on some code which relies on a remote api. Then the network speed suddenly drops to 14kbs. FUCKING FUCK FML10
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Boss: -We're firing one of our freelancers and you are taking over one of his projects.
Me: -OK, what is it?
Boss: Old POS project written in Java.
Me: -But I'm C# developer. I haven't touched Java in years!
Boss: -You'll manage...
FML I've managed to finish and fully refactor this piece of shit project.13 -
After 10 days of waiting for my replacement Xbox from microsoft... It never came so I asked Amazon and they sent me a new one with next day delivery. Just received it today... And it's defective.... fml.2
-
Today, the security department stopped our new project and told us to work on the last project instead because of a top-secret security flaw.
Problem is, they are not allowed to tell us what the problem is. FML2 -
That horrible feeling when you have to abandon your small project because litteraly nothing works... Even after 2 straight weeks of work, on a single f***ing function... Fml2
-
was working on a passion project, looking at the clock periodically. was surprised a couple of times that it's still before 12 but kept on working. it wasn't. its 3 am. windows' clock was stuck. i have to get up in 4 hours. fml.3
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One of my hard drives S.M.A.R.T. said it could fail anytime and I should backup my data. I cut all the files to a new hard drive.
Later that week the new drive fails with the needle falling into the magnetic disks... Fml.
Should've saved those files on the cloud...13 -
In an exam today having to read through two pages of writing on paper. So my brain automatically goes "ctrl-f"...then I realise this is real and I have to read the whole thing FML1
-
Today while looking at the logs, I found an issue.
The attached image describes this issue without going into too much detail about it, so like ... Enjoy I guess 🤷♂️ FML4 -
Spent the entire day looking into a bug. The problem was a space in the email address, that was stored in the DB. FML10
-
FML
brought my children to the childcare, went home and I am faced with A FUCKING CLOSED DOOR OF MY HOME WITHOUT ANY KEY and MY COMPANY NOTEBOOK, WALLET AND KEYS INSIDE!!! 😬9 -
UI Is the bane of my existence. I'm an embedded programmer i mainly deal with drivers daemons low level stuff no UI involved. why do they keep assigning mobile apps to me man ! #FML6
-
Just joined a new team at the organisation as senior dev.
Team lead keeps singing about how we need unit testing and good standards.
I implement domain pattern on the backend supported by unit tests.
It passes QA and then get an earful about the code not being 'restful'. What does that even mean?
Well, it matters not since team lead changes the whole feature in the release branch and all unit tests obviously fails. Builds start to fail.
The solution? Comment out all unit tests. In the sprint retro, we hear the same old adage 'we need 80% code coverage'
Do as i say, not as I do. FML.6 -
Getting a tour today at my new job (non-dev related, just pays the bills). it's quite a travel AND RIGHT ON THIS FUCKING DAY THE PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION PLANNER IS GIVING 500 ERRORS. FUCKING FUCK FML.2
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I finished a story of my sprint in VueJS, which is new to me, with occasional help from colleague A. I put it through to code review, and colleague B refuses to approve it before I rebuild half the codebase of my story to improve it. In a framework I am still very much learning. The sprint ends in two days. There isn't enough coffee for this. Fml. Help.9
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client wants the background mirror, so when users visit the website, they can look at themselves.
fml5 -
I'm currently traveling to Austria for 11 hours, my laptops battery is empty and this godforsaken train has no power source whatsoever.
I have to finish a project
fml3 -
*During meeting*
C:*smiling while looking at massex.py* 'MasSex' uh! You'd change it before pushing
In my defense it's short for Mass Execution not MasSex
FML5 -
I call this one the tester than knew too much.
Note: The server the tester is running on has a hard drive that is breaking down...
Tester: Remember the error I talked to you about yesterday?
Me: Yeah, what about it?
Tester: Well the server hasn't recovered yet and I haven't restarted anything...
Me: Well the application itself hasn't crashed so our monitoring application doesn't seem to notice that the service is in a bad state. The error seems only to have brought down certain threads within the application.
Tester: No, I think there is a different issue here and has nothing to do with that error, the application is still doing things.
*tails the log*
Tester: See?
Me: As I said some things are still running and are unaffected by the error.
Tester: NO! It has to be caused by the other error I had a week ago where my file got corrupted. As we said I removed the file, restarted it and it worked again, but had the same problem a day later...
Note: The problem is not related, this time the application is running out of file descriptors
Me: Well... If the problem is the same it would have complained about the file descriptors then aswell, not an I/O error.
Tester: Nope, I think you are wrong!
Me: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
FML3 -
A client just asked to reduce the budget on a project, which I have already delivered. fml. Also, I had a look at wakatime, and realised that I've spent over 100 hours on this project.4
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The sales team sold a project using our 'innovative framework', which had 'prebuilt components', which we 'only needed to plug n play' with a 10 week deadline. Of course, the framework didn't exist. Guess who was the lucky guy who had to create the framework AND finish the project in 10 weeks? fml...7
-
[Working on a Project]
- Added a few lines for log display to end user
- Breaks everything
- Spent an hour trying to resolve issue, fails
- Commented those lines
- Everything starts working again
- Uncommented those lines
- Everything still works
FML!3 -
Today, I had a segmentation fault in a data structure, so I wrote a function to test the integrity of the data structure. It worked, and I found and fixed the bug. However, the test still complained about the integrity. After debugging some very strange errors for 5 hours, I discover that there was a bug in the integrity test. The data structure works just fine. FML.1
-
It's 1:00( 1 am) here now...I wanted to get some coding done since 20:00(8 pm for the weird people ;P)
Got distracted by Dev rant all the time -.- and didn't write a single line of code...fml6 -
Messed up my sleep cycle again! Its 5:30 pm here and I have just woken up. Now the night is going to pass by coding runs, gaming streaks and perhaps a movie. In the morning again I have to be at the office to work. Will have to stay awake for 30 hours or so. FML!3
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When the test database has better specifications & performance than the production one.. FML! 😭😭😭😭😭2
-
Fml
I went to a client and forgot my laptop.
Called my boss to send me the file I needed just to realize 1 hour later that I had web access to the repo and could have download myself.
It looks like it will be a promessing day 😑1 -
When you test/debug every piece of code you made/changed and then find out the rest wasn't working as it should.. FML
Test everything, trust noone!!!!!!
Rewrite all!!2 -
Trying to develop an application to post rants about boss with a colleague for over a year. Today, found DevRant while finding a solution to build error. Don't know if I should bother with our application now. FML!2
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Have to finish this code today but only slept four hours last night, coffee isn't working anymore, making the most stupid mistakes and constantly dreaming away while looking at my screen because I can't focus anymore. Also, it's around 25 degrees here and the vents aren't working that great... fml.1
-
Being a computer science engineer, my friends expect me to be able to read binary like I read English. Fml.5
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Sometimes I use "KillMe" or "FML" in my debugging strings as a silent cry against whatever-the-fuck has upset me.2
-
Forgot to change code in my api for rate limiting, after development. No unit tests.. because who really needs that right? 🤦♂️🙅♂️🤷♂️lolololol
Long story short, API went to production eventually, and stopped working almost immediately. Rate limiting was set for 2000 requests in a 1 hour time period. Not my finest moment.. fml 🤦♂️ -
Just started my exams training! (Doing a study called Application Development).
The application doesn't sound that complicated but I have to implement a data exporting feature. Sounds alright, doesn't it?
THE 'CLIENT' DOES NOT KNOW WHAT DATA FORMAT THE FICTIVE CUSTOMERS CAN PARSE/HANDLE BUT I HAVE TO MAKE IT GENERIC SO THAT THEY CAN USE IT ANYWAYS. HOW THE FUCKING FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHAT FUCKING FORMAT I SHOULD CHOOSE?!? SHOULD I TRY TO SMELL IT OR SOMETHING?
FML.2 -
Spent 4h+ debugging my code (it was late)...only to realise that my code was not buggy, but the fuckup in design was in the original part I didn't change..FML..
-
Today I tried to find out why the constructor of my class wasn't called. After 2 hours I found out, that it was named "__constructor" and not "__construct"... I feel so dumb right now. FML2
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I made sure to commit all changes (from my desktop) before leaving my home for the weekend so I can continue my project at the parents house (going for a monthly visit)..
I arrived, synced all my changes to my laptop, all good and well, going perfect. Updated the bower components etc. Time to start some test runs so I started my localhost, opened my browser,..Ended up with a MySQL errors galore.. Unknown table this and that.. I forgot the export my MySQL database :'( #fml1 -
Product manager calls me at 7 PM. "There's gonna be a slight change in the module. You can reuse lot of existing code and I'm sure it won't take much for you to finish. "
Me: Okay, let me take a look at it tomorrow morning.
The next day I saw the spec change.
One and half weeks later, I'm still doing the change.
#FML2 -
The moment when you fall down on yoir own in the middle of the street and people laughing at you quietly... (fml)4
-
That moment when you browse github repos to contribute but then you realize the APIs are way more advanced than you're coding skills. #fml2
-
I recently got a project for scaling multiple wordpress sites for around 5k req/s
The biggest mistake I made is that even though it's wordpress I accepted it, fml!
Even aws load balancer gave up.5 -
Sittning on a train home drunk a f right now. Only thing I can think of is the interview I got on monday. Fml. Shouldnt rant while im drunk. God save the queeen.2
-
the happy moment when you get turned down by agencies over the phone, when they "don't think you are what they are looking for" although you have 4 years commercial experience and are 23 years old, by an agent that fancies the term API and WordPress... fml3
-
So, a close relative of me is a local politician in my hometown.
I managed his political website for a while but then I completely left it in the hand to who deal whit is PR.
Today he emailed me to update only the header photo. No big deal.
After a bit of scrambling I find what I used when I made that.
FML I hate me of the past -
me: Today will be a productive code efficient day
also me: what is diz devRant
then me: man this is lit
*fml*11 -
We are not ready, I won't sign on this shit I said!
Release on Friday, what could go wrong? All unit tests passed they said!
It's Tuesday and shit is still broken!
FML -
Spend two days struggling with environment variables not being available in python script running on a docker container, tried providing environment variables directly, not working, tried providing a env file, not working
.
.
.
Turns out I was passing variables to the wrong container fml2 -
When you ask your infrastructure admins for a firewall rule and you are very specific. They say that you don't need it... you troubleshoot for 2 hours then argue with them for 5 hours. Then they add the rule and it works. I want to punch someone right now and have a beer. FML!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Just got picked in a national “lottery” for mandatory military training for a year. And I moved to another city more than half a year before, got a very good job. Fml. Europe at that5
-
Today's my company's official final day with Slack.
Starting tomorrow it's nothing but the "superior" Google Chat. I will have no choice but to join the others who have already migrated over.
FML
It also mean I won't have any access to messaging outside the office because I don't want to accept the security certs on my phone.2 -
Rant?
So... I've been to the doctor's, I have a high blood pressure (I'm only 30 ffs).
She says I'm too grumpy, over thinking and should loose weight.
FML I'm gonna die young... At least the wife will get my life insurance...17 -
Company with CULTURE
Company who doesnt allow tech team to WFH but editorial team is fine (or sales)
Sonos playing ALL DAY, and sales team talking all day, next to tech team desk
Dont u love open space offices?
Fuck this
FML4 -
I am working as a junior in a company that pays me minimum wage and doesn't give a single fuck about my existence.
"Change the job", you say?
Well, that's what I am trying to do for, like, 3rd month now. No one wants to invest into junior...
Every day I go to work with thoughts about quitting, but I need a job... Even if it's like this...
fml.
F
M
L9 -
Turns out deleting a git branch also deletes your unchanged changes fuckkkkk
Well as good a time as any to learn how to use 'git fsck' and manually sort through hundreds of dangling blobs
FML7 -
Fml
Friday: I just finished a project with someone and I went and told my boss that I'm done with this some other work can be allotted to me. He told me that I can start working on another project with another guy. This guy told me that we'll have to start working from tomorrow.
I was mentally taken aback because I thought Saturday's are holidays. And I had a feeling that maybe Saturdays are working but I wasn't just showing up(sidenote: I'm an unpaid intern here who started a month back). So I asked him one more time whether I should come tomorrow. He replied with a ya.
Saturday: I get ready take a cab to office only to realize that Saturday's are not working and what he understood from my 'tomorrow' was Monday.2 -
So I went to some meetup with my boss.
Suddenly some old friend of mine shows up, and we start talking..
- „Where do you work now?“
„$company in $city“
- „And.. Do you like it there?“
„Now way, I hate my job.. Too many idiots around!“
The thing is: My boss was right behind me all the time and heard everything..
FML!3 -
So ironically after posting this rant this morning: https://devrant.com/rants/2376420/...
I came into work to an all hands meeting. Same situation that happened a year ago today is happening again with my current (now former) job. Being laid off effective immediately due to lack of funds.
FML.8 -
Just realized I don't have a good social life outside home/college. Most of the time I spend time with my laptop and phone.
And at this moment am too afraid to socialize because my friends and family been doubting at my mental stability after seeing me talking to my PC.
Its been ages since I have played any games outside or hang around with friends. Sometimes I do hate the way I am now and want to ditch all these screens once and go gipsy around the world. Fml!!2 -
Today my 2 week old phone slips out of my pocket while standing up, falls on the screen and now it's cracked in multiple places. FML.
RIP Stormtrooper (he's black and white).
Repair is 30% of the new price. Worth it, but still a lot of money and 10 days without the phone.
Aaarghhhh!8 -
ordered a new laptop bag, tracking said it was delivered Sunday, but fucking USPS forgot to put the parcel locker key in my mailbox. fml. I just want my bag.3
-
I recently moved to another apartment. The technician who was going to install the internet connection on Saturday couldn't make it because apparently you hace to ask for permission with 48hrs of anticipationwith the administrator of the apartment complex. So all weekend with no internet I felt like a fucking caveman FML.
-
Yet another ticket comes in about a feature not working after we push another update. So in my meeting I bring up adding testing would reduce this. Yeah boss just wants me to fix this issue and just do manual tests....fml1
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Daaamn! I needed to process some data simultaneously using PHP, so I thought of using Threads to make things faster, checked out SO and discovered that the available Thread class can only be used in cli environment not on a web server ... FML 😑.
It's like these moments that I remember why I hate PHP, and regret accepting this job.
I miss Java 😣😣6 -
Working for one of our oldest customer, in some serious old, ugly and outdated code(web service).
The dev db doesn't contain any relevant data.
The QA service points to production, so can't use it for any tests.
My contact, at the customer, is going on vacation tomorrow.
Their pm is going on vacation next Friday.
No time for refactoring, db data updates or otherwise do important and much needed updates.
They want it to be done yesterday.
FML. -
11:30 in my timezone. Was supposed to wrap-up meeting for project finalization 3 hours ago. Sitting here rn, listening to a coworker in management explain the importance of equal respect for all employees in the company. The Boss has left the meeting because he has "better" things to do. FML4
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Relative phones up worried about installing Adblocker as it "can store and modify the websites you visit"...my answer.."so can GCHQ, NSA AND CIA so just give in to the fact that you have no privacy and click ok"...*long pause*.."ok one more question, what's a chrome extension?"..FML
-
You’re know you’re screwed when you get pulled into a project you weren’t involved with in the beginning, and coz of tight timelines they tell you “it’s time to jump and swim now”
FML2 -
How does it feel to get out of a project after investing a year of your life in it and then having it shelved? FML..........4
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I spent most of a day a few weeks ago tracking down and fixing a NaN bug in a framework I use. I hacked it into my local copy of the framework's code.
Today I have the same bug, and after several hours of searching I finally realize I'd updated to a new version of said framework and so had overwritten my fix....
FML3 -
The worst part of collecting crash reports is that the application crashes the whole system so the report won't be sent. Fml
-
We have a list of 1.5k different dependencies for various projects. And they wanted to check if each of those deps has been approved by the management.
They have no way to automate this. (I believe there is always a way to automate any fucking thing but my pm says there is no way)
And no employee in the company was keen to do this task so they decided to give it to interns.
Now I am sitting on my table, copying each and every dep, pasting in the browser (on their portal ) and noting down if it's approved. If it's not, I have to note the latest version that had been approved.
I have been doing this from morning. 400 done. 1000 to go.
fml11 -
I am learning to hate working for a large company!
Tuition reimbursement I earned is getting denied because of the freaking beuracracy!
The ONE perk I actually had left at my job and they took that away too!
FML3 -
Aaaah FUUUUUUCK!!!!!
As if I had nothing better to not nor deadlines I went on a mission to tweek my i3-wm installation with resulted in lightdm not starting... FML7 -
It's like I know staying up all night is gonna kill me the next day, and I do it anyways... and now it's the next day. Fml 😫4
-
Teacher asks me to join him for a web app development.
First stages, I have to dig deep into a framework I don't know (He doesn't know it too, and I know that learning is the only way to step through)
Month goes by, began developing some mock-ups, he says he didn't like it, sends me a website made in fucking Wix. Seriously?
Fast forward another month, tonight I'm coding some stuff, he stills doesn't know how to fucking use Yii. fml4 -
So we have this project that we are hosting on our testing server for presentation purposes ( already provisioning prod server ).
Our boss was presenting it to investors and my superior committed a bug there and was asking me help to figure out how to fix it (yeah.. he doesn't know how to checkout last commits in git... fml), and I realised the presentation might still be going on... so I asked: isn't boss showing it to investors?
superior: lol, idk maybe.
me: right... ( I proceed to roll back changes ) bye, have a good lunch.
And here I am having lunch considering my life choices. -
!dev
FUUUU*K, I lost my wallet today with a ton of important cards inside.. F**K F**K F**K FML
Note of the day: A wallet is as important as a smartphone is!5 -
FML. Just when I finally managed to dual boot win10 and centos, only to just read the news of RHEL change its focus and shift to make me a beta user into Centos Stream. Time to distro hop to Arch.7
-
And another weekend full of work, because I don‘t get shit done in the office.
Being kind if the lead dev in my team, everyone is coming to me for nearly everything and I rarely have time to work on my current ‚fulltime‘ project.
It‘s really frustrating. I just want to code .__. FML
(Maybe I should learn other programming languages and switch jobs? I always wanted to learn Haskell)2 -
who's so stressed out right now? me.
why? i need to change the access token in my code because it was changed
why is that stressful? because there is no variable for it, it was hardcoded
who coded that? me.
when? when the whole dev team was drunk asf
fml1 -
when you're struggling to build small sized firmware on your 512Kb IoT Device resulting in bootloop every time... Then you see in the manual, that you have the 4Mb model and you frashed the rom to the wrong memory address for 2 weeks resulting in a bootloop... FML
-
So I've recently hurt ring finger of my left hand and now I'm typing shit while coding. Like I've to retype nearly every word or literal that has S W or X in it. FML
-
So I was working on a Web Assembly project and when I ran my build chain everything compiled fine, when I would run it however, I'de get random exception when I changed things like a value of a float. After 3 hours I realized the build chain had been "finished" while it was actually still writing out a file, and when I was accessing the web page, the file was corrupt for the first 30 seconds or so. Spent so long trying to fix something that actually wasn't broken FML.4
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You've got the perfect architecture lined up, a great idea about how to transition and you're about to start refactoring. Then it hits you. You've got 10 clients running your code in production and you'll have to migrate their data to the new structures, from the blob to each new microservice datastore. For each release. FML.1
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Modifying .htaccess for WordPress multisite so that my custom url(slug) will redirect to wp-login for security reasons.
It is like performing a neuro surgery where the slightest of mistake will get u paralyzed.
I have already reached a vegetative state..
I wonder what more damage I could do? FML.3 -
Was looking forward to a nice day of programming, finally had some free time to spend
No power today, fml :(
My laptop is now out of power -
There's a production site with api call limits. We experienced waaaaay more visitors than usual and I forgot to increase the api call limit, so new users weren't able to do anything. FML again, update emails sent out.2
-
Can't sleep, thinking about this side project I'm going to start tomorrow.
Which is probably going to last for about 2 days or 3 days, after that it will be a inactive repository, like every other side project.
FML3 -
I've now spent 4 hours trying to understand this piece of shit stored procedure.
3475 lines of pure shit with 3 levels down nested sub-selects.
FML!1 -
Finished building an app for a client and sent it to them. Messaged them every week for a month asking if things were OK and if they needed any assistance (no invoice sent either). 6 weeks later I wake up to a stream of emails and missed calls about a small bug that they demand being fixed immediately because of an urgent business need. Fixed the bug. Sent invoice. It's been nearly 2 months and still waiting for payment. FML.3
-
Fuck fuck fuck. Joined a new gig. Been a week and today saw code which did something like this: .append(“<style>.add{}”)
FML! And this is a react app. -
Second Rant incoming!
I have a Elephone p9000 (China Smartphone). Great Value for it's price if you don't mind a shit camera.
Also, this is actually my second model! I cracked my screen and tried to replace it. Somehow I managed ti puncture the battery and nearly set my house on fire but that is another story.
This rant is about how the sd/sim-card read is FAILING ME! Everytime I call someone, my sim-card ejects spontaneously, thus ending the call. It's so goddamn annoying having to recall the same person every two minutes...
I tried inserting the sim-card in the other slot because it has dual sim but nothing changed...guess I need a new Phone. FML3 -
> merging feature 20155
> Removing debug messages for previous commit
> Fixing bug from feature merge
> Fixing bug from previous fix
> Merge fml -
TeamLeader : "Come two seconds"
TL : "I'd like you to check that out when you do that"
Me: "But it's your job to do this"
TL: "Yeah, but I'd like you to just check in case I forgot"
THEN DO YOUR FKING TASK PROPERLY WHATS THE POINT IF YOU FORGOT AND I DO IT
Edit my english sucks1 -
When you are debugging a function, and dumps all the DBG variables, and then puts an exit() to stop the execution....
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
But now it runs perfectly without any bugs... 😭😭😭
FML. -
Using WhatsApp beta,
Got a update today , I installed
Saw my contacts, it said "No contacts" invite friend.
Iam like WTF ,what happened to my contacts!?
It's gone.
Now iam thinking on the developer ,who pushed this update!
#FML9 -
Mistakenly executed 'sudo chmod 0 /usr/bin/sudo' on computer lab's Ubuntu 12.04 system.
Now each time I type sudo, permission is being denied. FML.5 -
FML when the code that runs every 10 minutes to check and bill a customer keeps charging him and the logs are terrible plus you have no idea what the issue was so you have to push production code to test and fix.
-
Lesson learned.
If you're planning on buying a MacBook and WWDC is ≤ 4 or ≤ 5 months away, JUST WAIT FOR IT.
Bought min almost 2 weeks before wwdc, and turns out they made a refresh of the same model...
FML2 -
Today I spent 2.5h missing a flag in pdfLaTeX just because I forgot I am working on a different machine with different settings. #FML
I should have a central VM server!1 -
I drive for 2 hours in the scorching heat and shitty traffic to reach work only to find out my manager is on leave and he hasn't scheduled any tasks for me. FML8
-
That fucking sad moment when you wake up with a lot of ideas to code but then you realize your pc is in the other city you work and you don't have another one at home. FML
-
I bought a MacBook Pro Retina wanting to upgrade the memory, then realized the Retina models have it soldered onto the motherboard.
I need to run Visual Studio for ASP.NET development but can't fathom paying $80 for a Parallels license at the moment. I've tried VirtualBox, but the RAM usage is really high for the 4GB I'm limited to.
FML.8 -
I've just fucked up my ssh config on one of my arch VM... Had to destroy it and make a new one ...
Fml -
Have been working on a project for a year, something that wasn't out yet, and I am very close to finishing it... Just heard that a company has been developing the software for two years and is about to be done. #FML5
-
Just got a letter telling me I need to pay my own health insurance as a student. What's that, you want all my money? Fml4
-
Found that in the sources..
var devRantBall = 150;
for (var i = 0; myRants.lenght > i; i++){
if (myRants[i] > devRantBall / 10) {
devRantBall += 15;
Fml();
}
}4 -
Sat here for 30 minutes trying to find an error a client saw that I fixed earlier (mobile error). After going through everything I could think of, it turns out his browser was just caching... Fml2
-
Spent 4 hours debugging a script. Running the commands manually in cli worked fine but not when run as a web service. I've done similar things before so I was confident it should work. I tried literary everything I was going crazy. Turns out that Atom added some garbage characters only visible in other editors.. And this was not the first time! Fml..
-
first time working with android. using threads debugging is not working like it should. app works great when I'm not debugging. code doesn't get executed WTF i really need that stressball FML
-
For a moment, hold your php-hate in..
..FOR FUCKS SAKE they turned off warnings and errors on the server for customer applications. What the fuck. I mirrored one of those to fiddle around at home to find all generated files stuffed with "warning: we have no idea what we are doing at every line".
FML.
And yeah, the solution for my end is kind of simple, turn them off, too, but how about coding it the right way?:I -
Fucking fuck,..!! was trying Angular2 in Electron... cloned 1repo tried to integrate Chart.js got fucked up because of old version of angular2 then cloned another repo and tried got fucked up again because they have changed little bit in newer version. FML.....
-
My mind and fingers are feeling restless wanting to code but my eyes are too tired and strained to look at anything.
FML2 -
I started running a Database benchmark yesterday morning, with my system configuration, expected time to complete was 36hrs(arround), so I left it and made sure no one disturbs (I stuck a note in the monitor) because it was on common system in the lab.
Then I went to my other work.
Evening ,I came to check the progress, my monitor was switched off, I thought its in power saving mode!
Fuck, I bend down and see the CPU is off!
Wtf!! Who shut it down ,even after the note.
Then I saw the electric outlet was off!
Then after wards asking ppl in the lab, they told ,the cleaning person was cleaning the switches, so yeah she could have by mistake!
* I facepalmed *
So again, I set it up with frustration!
Today morning ,I came to see the progress
FML, from no where ,
" It's in Windows automatic repair loop! "
It's been 3hrs, trying to get out of that loop without loosing the data.
1TB of data is there, took 1month to setup all the things
Fuck Microsoft for adding these kind idiotic stuff in windows.
Is there a spirit in the lab not allowing me to do benchmark? -
I am very close to being a violent psychopath from "Always code as if the person who ends up maintaining your code is a violent psychopath who knows where you live."
Foreach within a foreach with counters and a check if the counters match in the inner foreach and in that case do something.... And that's not even the worst part of the code I have to modify ever so slightly... Fml3 -
When did I become a PM myself!
Sitting in meetings where stupid ideas are discussed. Currently discussing an idea of a fashion blogger. FML! -
Spent countless hours on internet reading WMI documentation to write a RAT agnent for our server side application only to find out there is a WMI Creator Tool which literally generates code for such purposes. FML1
-
Got bored and tired of making my program at JavaFX, decided to change to new programming language with new GUI framework. Chose Ruby and after a bit of research the easiest GUI framework is Shoes. Started making program but ugh. When I run the program, to clicked a link on it you have to locate mouse 10px top of that link. Weird af. Now I'm installing the ruby on my windows machine, hoping there was something wrong with shoes on Linux. Fml2
-
FML
Looks like my macbook air is dead. Screen went black just like that after I logged in.
My life is kinda ruined if I can't recover the data.12 -
was making quine McCluskey calculator on Arduino, does 100% of work, didn't slept properly for 3 days, didn't bath for 5 days, investment ~90$.
group didn't paid their part of money.
The teacher just said keep the project on table and leave, I didn't even got to demonstrate it. FML.1 -
The only way I can edit Puppet config files is by git. And the only way I can git pull/push/commit/etc is generating a ssh key with a private key and give my public key to my supervisor to the git server (wherever that may be).
Because I'm on Windows 10 and screwed up my installers, I completely forgot to backup my ssh keys before resetting it. FML2 -
Been worrying all year that I won't find a job next year after I finish my studies im november. So I decided to study for one more year, just to learn a little more of the tech before I enter the real world.
A day after my registration went through and my studies are paid for, I get a call from a recruiter to come in for a interview. Fml2 -
When you accidentally deleted the SDK folder that was named the same as your project folder.. fml... facepalm... fuuuuu......
-
I once had to install a Mac OS VM for a school project. I tried customizing one simple thing in the boot options and I was meet with a green screen with an apple support phone number, no debug options. FML. We ended up begging the TA to do Android app instead, and we did :)
-
Worst experience this week: bad_alloc in my C++ program in 5 out of 10 executions (all with the same arguments) without a stack trace. FML.
-
Today was a shitty day. i made a mistake and lost my work (3days of work gone) had to do it from scratch managed to recover some parts tho. FML1
-
A shitty platform that, although open source, there is no clearly documented way of setting a development environment for it. This pile of crap states clearly that it does NOT support RTL languages. One of the core business requirements is Arabic support. What to do? Look for other platforms? WRONG!
Base the fucking business on it and ask ME to see why the SQL database is not encoding the Arabic characters correctly and to look into the logs that back-end puked. My expertise is mobile development anyways damnit. Sure the backend code is Java code (Java jokers and haters, not the appropriate place) and I know it but there is no fucking way to test that motherfucker or to build it! No fucking testing server can be made! Only instructions to get a Docker image pulled and set up.
FML.
"This company is a fucking م."
I cannot believe I am so frustrated that I am ending this rant with a fun puzzle.
Hints to help you decipher the quoted sentence:
Hint 1: That Arabic letter is the perfect letter.
Hint 2: You don't need to be an Arab to understand what it means.6 -
Applied to a new place that seems cool. Feedback: I am overqualified for what they need and they know I would get bored and leave.
Ok, so let's stay bored in the current one... fml.1 -
My HDD broke last night. Woke up to something making squeaking sounds. It was the HDD. When it broke, my laptop also acted weirdly. My laptop wouldn't even shut down. Let the battery drain, but lost the HDD. Something is broken, internal. Cannot recover the data myself because it no longer rotates. I now have to spend hundreds of dollars to get it to a data recovery company.
FML9 -
When you have a manager that gets the requirements for a super simple content page one month ago...
Then argues with some people about where it needs to go...
Then when it was decided two weeks ago that it needed to be a new publishing site insists on getting approval to deploy the new site even when I said hey I can have this guy set up publishing on our external server...
Gets approval anyway, now the deadline for it to be activated and working is tomorrow and because he is "a Wordpress developer" (by which he can install a theme) he thinks he knows how to fix Wordpress...
Because of the security at our company it needs to be over https and we are doing ssl offload from our publisher and Wordpress doesn't seem to like it or it is his jacked up Windows box running Wordpress? Wtf
Best of all he said "do you think we will meet the deadline". I said I don't think we have a choice, this will be used by a lot of people Saturday for a conference. OMG I was ready to scream...
Now today I need to setup a new cms on an external server and get it done by tomorrow morning, with content. FML -
So I'm working on this codebase that has about 50k lines of code and I built a feature in it today. Spent 3hours on the feature + writing tests. Then I raised a pull request and that bastard codeclimate calculated the test coverage had dropped by 0.3%.
For 6hours now I'm still looking for a way to increase the test coverage by 0.2%. FML4 -
FUCK
My laptop battery just died, this morning it was working fine, i left it in standby and when i got back it was turned off, now it shows 0% not charging.
The laptop is less than 2 years old, i think windows killed the battery by letting it fully discharge (well, it's my fault after all), still now i've got to get a new one (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻.
fml2 -
updated docker for windows a few days back.. I have to reinstall on every reboot in order for it to work...
its either Hyper V being a dick or the docker guys screwed something with the update... fml1 -
When you join a React JS SPA project months after the start to discover that 2 CSS grid systems with totally different breakpoints have been in use in parallel since 5 months, hidden by layer upon layer of abstraction, and that no dev bothered to fix, let alone notice.
#FML -
Working with a client (who is a "techie") to authenticate mailchimp for their domain. After a week of fumbling about and with pressure building, the domain registrar claims to have set the correct DNS settings and to get pressure off him, he writes an email saying,
"CNAME has been added ask mailchimp to propagate on their end". FML -
I have most of my files including all my side projects stores on an SD card that is allways connected to my Mac. Today it stooped working. All gone. One summer of coding wasted. FML.7
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Client was on a budget and it couldn't go past CMS dev work. He wanted A MILLION EXTRA FUNCTIONS and didn't believe me when I told him I'd have to code from the child theme and disregard his pre-installed full theme... fml
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I had a meeting 5days after accepting work from a client (the project was basically a mirror version of your typical job board with extra features).
The client and our project manager joined forces in labeling my progress/project/work "untouched" because it was simply still undeployable.. fml -
I was so excited to learn React Native and I know basics of React too, so I thought it will be fine.
Spent one and half hour watching video and I was happy that I'm almost gonna finish this and last point was Navigator......
Got error its deprecated and have to take another way. I'm still searching how to do it and eventually now I'm not in mood of learning that.... Fml1 -
I just spent half an hour trying to get nginx to serve owncloud on a subdomain. I read like 10 tutorials, copied shit from 20 different example configs, only to find out I didn't set the `root` location. FML1
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I've ordered hardware like 24 days ago. Shipping company lost the package and I've just got confirmation the to see my money I have to wait another 20+ days. FML
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#Rant
When someone decides to alter the UI and replace replace buttons with glyphicons with zero id's or anything and Breaks the UI integration testing project and doesnt even realise.!
FML on a Friday pre testing env release 2! -
Goverment just confirmed 2nd January as National holiday (work free day)...scheduled Nationwide production on 1st January, 2nd January for bug fixes (no holiday for me)
FML! -
Resource not found exception occurred when i tried to set an integer text inside a TextView in android.
Spent an hour trying to comb through my entire android app's layout resources looking at all the declared ids and cross checking then.
Didn't work. Tried googling and stumbled upon a stray human who had encountered a similar issue.
Turns out if you print an integer inside the setText, it will not consider it a normal printable value, it will think that's it's a resource id and try to use it.
Fucking misleading exception. FML ANDROID5 -
When the backend service you use religiously decides its going to shut down, and the only other real alternative for you is Firebase... But doesn't have a Xamarin/C# API... fml...3
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I was the new guy in a meeting where we had to decide who works on which projects.. I was last pick and had to take one for the team.. Build a freaking WordPress plugin... Fml
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For my side project, I spend more time in thinking about other thinks like Hosting, Disk Space and RAM rather then actually building the application. Lol..fml
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I just had a long argument with the scrum master about my roles as a developer, and apparently it looks like, that I am a tester and a project owner too. For just one payment. FML!
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they say internet is spoiling us. sitting outside on saturday afternoon sipping beer and calling all my frns in different countries and none of them picking. fml. seems I made many frns.2
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“My whatever isnt working“
“Was there an error message“
“Yes“
“What was it?“
“I dont know I dismissed it“
FML1 -
So last year we started off with an IOT smart home project combined with SAP HANA, everything went well with the hardware side of it. Wired up everything and functioning smooth as butter. When we try to connect to the HANA cloud db to store sensor data... we find out that Arduino isn't supported. A big FML!!2
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So I just ran crontab -r while thinking that I should be careful not to run it when trying to run crontab -e FML!4
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Got deployed on a freshly created team taking over an existing project. Was working on a task. One day later, dev lead came along, my current task was being handed to him, I will be transferred over at a different component with less resource. My current work has some setup code changes advised by one of the dev originally handling the project so it could be built and I could start working while somebody else fix it. I asked the devlead if he would like a patch of my current changes along with the setup fixes so he could start working on it. He said, 'just commit it to our feature branch'. Days later, he told me why I committed stuff that wasn't included to the task, referring to the setup code. Accused me that it's because I used git terminal.
I was shookt. From then on, everything I say, I do, weren't taken seriously. I want to quit. fml. It doesn't really help that I look like a kid.1 -
im having this subject in my academic syllabus - VHDL. the teacher was teaching its programming syntax and he didnt know the difference between a hyphen( - ) and an underscore( _ )2
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Use a product that is not the greatest, but does its job fairly well in the human capital management market. Anyhow this POS can't communicate very well with Azure extended end points via rest. FML. Now I'm building workarounds and I know this bs is gonna bite me in the ass.
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Start to work. 15 minutes in boss comes in "do you have a second to guide me through this random part of our online company made software I sell to clients daily because I can't be bothered to use my brain or read any documentation" 2 hours later get back to work...15 minutes in boss comes in again.
FML why can't anybody understand that people need time to get their work done.
End of release cycle: why isn't feature xy finished, you said it should be finished this cycle of no one distracted you to much1 -
Had to install .net 1.1 to try and get some shitty old db application to work. Still doesn't work, but it messed up all my wcf services. Fml. >_<3
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When the network monitor you wrote decides to go offline for unknown reasons the same day you have your bachelor thesis presentation.
FML :/ -
Spent a week writing my own orm because I didn't think codesmith would work with my project. After it's finally done, a co-worker tells me I can just add a reference to the existing orm project solution and use that. Fml
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Ionic2 + pouch DB seem to be a good choice ... No I sit her 8 hours and try to get a database access fml
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I have just declared the following bool flag:
bool m_HasRecordBeenStarted_becauseIAudioPlayerIsStupidAndReturns1InGetPlaybackLengthWithNoSound;
FML -
Got a Game Design sign-off due last friday. Last Thursday the GD mentiones that basic stuff isn't implemented, which she didn't take notice of for the past half year i'm developing and i should do it asap. While having another game with one trillion bugs due the same friday which is in endtest.
fml -
Goddamn I've been fighting with unRAID lately, all to find out I've probably got a broken SSD. And to top it all off I've fucked up the other one so I had to reformat it. Sometimes when shit goes south, IT REALLY FUCKING GOES SOUTH. Fml.
Link to forum post for more details: https://forums.lime-technology.com/...
Damn it feels nice to have a place to rant.1 -
Came to college to finally study the subject I love, to code in peace. After finally getting through the rigorous admission process in which you study stuff that isn't actually relevant to the stream you'll be choosing in college. And all of this for what to join in the vain pursuit of getting a good CGPA. All of this is literally sucking the time out of my life. Fml
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The worst part about writing JS is not having a reliable development environment. I have literally had three different outputs for THE SAME FUCKING CODE! <sarcasm> It's almost like they are not even complete or something </sarcasm> FML3
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VPN -> SSH -> git clone -> git branch -> sshfs pull -> edit-> restart VPN/SSH every hour or so when it goes down -> sshfs push -> git commit -> git push -> fml
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Fml!!!!! Doing some mobile automation and the client emails askimg me to automate a signature simulating a client signs for an item........... well sure let me make about 50 random squiggles quick , cause you know. That shits easy. (Facepalm)
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Almost all the company uses git, I even took a training about git and how does it integrate with internal tools.
In my team they use mercurial.
fml. -
Proccess hangs after my integration tests run because of a database connection that isnt being closed somewhere >.<... node doesnt make it any either to debug either. Fml.
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I got a task to work on during sprint planning on Monday. Felt the task was a 2hour task and procrastinated to do it on Tuesday. Tuesday came and I pushed it to Wednesday.
Today is Friday and I'm just realizing the task is a microservice on it's own. FML1