"We're letting you go"

"Oh, why?"

"Well we gave you a laptop to work on for a reason, we expected you to take it home and have passion for your work"

"..."

Could've saved me a lot of time if they had told me from the start that they just wanted free labor

Brain: hey kiddo, want to stay home and work on your side project today? I'm feeling good.
Me: fuck yeah finally!

*call in sick.
*open laptop. Tabs and editors already waiting.
*play music, no sound.
*system is all laggy.
*fuck, restart.
*
*Installing windows updates...

*leaves for work.

Holy fuck, muscle memory just saved my ass.

At a train station wanting to do some work on my mini laptop which has disk encryption (LUKS I think). Realised that I forgot the password partly 😬

Few tries.... incorrect. FUCK.

*hey, let's try to let my hands do the work based on muscle memory!*

*starts typing the password (its insanely long) and presses enter*

*succesfully unlocked, booting...*

😅

Well, here's my work setup.

Please don't judge 🤓

Me: arrives in office plugin laptop
Laptop: ok let's a start windows
Windows: hello, welcome back!
Me: opens Android Studio, VS code, Nativescript Sidekick ... Continue work where I took off before Christmas
Windows: lets reboot this bitch!
Laptop: Oh lord!
Me:

Power outage, no one with a desktop is doing any work.

I have a laptop :(

// sorry, again a story not a rant
Category->type = 'Story';
Category->save();

Today at work I got a strange email

'about your msi laptop'

(Some background information, a few months ago I went on vacation and left my work laptop at home. Long story short some one broke in and stole my msi laptop)

So this email had my interest. I opened it and the content was something like:

Hi! My name is x, I clean/repair laptops partime and I noticed your personal information on this laptop, normally people whipe their data from their laptop before selling so this is just a double check, if the laptop was stolen please call me on xxx

If I hear nothing I'll assume its alright and will whipe your data

So of course I immediately called him, after a conversation I informed the police who is now working on the case

Sister = bee ( who isn't a stranger to Ubuntu)
Me = Cee

Bee: can I use your laptop?
Cee : why ? Use yours ,it's works fine.
Bee : no I want to use yours and I need to work with windows.
Cee: 🤯
Bee : my work can only be done using windows.
Cee : fine do whatever ( doesn't want to argue )
* Le bee opens MS word, and starts her work *
Cee : 😤😤Seriously?
Bee : I don't like libre
Cee : 😑😑😑^∞
* Few moments later *
Bee : my work is done ,you can have your laptop,btw it's updating.
Cee : 😑😑😑😑😑
* 2000 years later *
*Opens Ubuntu *
*Getting a weird bug*
*Tried to fix *
*Can't open OS files * 👏👏👏🎆
* Windows not shutdown properly *
* Opens windows *
* Not able to login via pin *
* Password ? not accepted *
* Changes outlook password *
* Please chose a password you haven't chosen before *
* Logs in *
* types old pin to change pin *
*You've entered wrong pin too many times *
*System hanging a lot *
* Removes pin *
* Gets huge mcAfee restart system popups , every 10 sec *
* Just shutdown , feels irritated for the rest of the day*

* Regrets dual booting, shd have wiped the windows partition 😫😫*

*Wonders,what the hell did my sister even do to my laptop ?*

Overheard a conversation in class today: This dude was talking about how "Linux was terrible and worthless" because he'd spent a few hours trying to install Ubuntu on his laptop over the weekend and couldn't get it to work. I don't know how to tell him Linux isn't the problem here.

When you let your partner at work borrow your laptop... 🤔🤔

I think I’m a bit unusual in that my favorite place to code is on the couch, just using my laptop. During the work day I use two monitors, but I find it more comfortable to just use a lap desk and laptop when I get home/on weekends. I’m not sure if it’s from laziness or whatever, but it seems to work.

TL;DR they blocked github
I work remotely, that means every once in a while I take my laptop and travel somewhere, work and have fun. This week I am visiting Turkey, they just blocked github 2 days ago... Freaking github... who does that?! and why?!

Gets email from work

"New password policy introduced from next month

Passwords will have to include:
- a capital
- a lower case
- a number
- a symbol
- be at least 8 characters

Passwords will be be changed every 60 days with a new password not previously used"

Everyone starts moaning, there I am laughing as I'm in Linux and off their domain controller, and my windows laptop is a BYOD laptop and they don't want it on the domain :D

Multiple friens asked if I could help someone with her "laptop".

Me: so I hear that you have problems with your laptop?
She: oh yea let me get my laptop.
A minute later she comes back with an iPad mini.
She: I cant get this app to work!

How can they all call that a laptop! *facepalm*

When my brain is on turbo boost mode to complete my coding projects and my parents are like "son stop playing with your laptop, do some productive work, think of your future". 🙂🔫

New job with 100% remote work. They don’t have a laptop sent. I am paid to wait for a delivery.

Friends brother: So what do you do for work?

Me: I am a DevOps engineer

FB: *blank stare* 😐

Me:I work with computers and fix servers.

FB: Awsome. Well my laptop been acting up lately. Can you..?

Me: NO

Credits: nixcraft

Yesterday I installed windows on the laptop of my parents. I thought no biggie I'm just going to do something else while it installs. AND THEN IT STARTS TALKING. WTF!!!

Also it said I can turn the voice of BUT THE FUCKING BUTTON DIDN'T WORK.

I hate windows.

4 week summer vacation over. Did not code any sideprojects and opened laptop only to watch netflix on vacation (Stranger Things ❤️). My liver will be pleased that its over. Tomorrow back to work, hopefully I remember how to code again 😜

When you start a job and they tell you to put your nice laptop away, because you'll have to work on a company provided laptop running Windows 7 in a constricted environment on a project using Svn. And to top it off they tell you to trade in your IntelliJ for NetBeans.

Did I just travel back in time?

Third day at work .. finally got my laptop Yaaay!! now I can code!
Me: Can I have access to the repository?
Co-worker: we don't have one.
Me: Silent!!

So I found this sticker while cleaning my desk. Now my work laptop looks better

Skype, on my laptop, updated the other day. It was like: 'Oh hey we're downloading skype for windows 10!', and I was like 'oh yeah? cool! ... wait, I'm not on Windows 10 WAIT WHAT ARE YOU DOING NO WAIT NO STOP'

And now it doesn't work. Yay!

Currently on the train to work:
*Guy pulls out his laptop

Me: *Oh nice. Dell laptop. Oh wait, shoot, that’s a Dell XPS 15. 😎Sweet!! Looks super clean. Get it boss, I salute you. Anyway, it’s probably running Windows 10 as expected. It’d be super cool if it run Ubuntu though.

*Guy lifts laptop lid.

Me: *Ahh, look how clean it is too. No fingerprints or smudges on the screen or keyboard. That’s my style. I like this guy. We can definitely share laptops.

*Guy powers on laptop

Me:*Woooooohooooo, no way!!! Gets a little tear of joy in my eyes. I want to hug this guy. This guy rocks. Oh mann, I want to start a conversation with him but can’t because another passenger is standing between us.

*The laptop run Ubuntu! 😍😱😁

Wasted whole day installing Ubuntu and get it to work on my laptop 😥
Now going back on Windows...

Dad: you should buy a laptop now
Me: But i just upgraded my pc
Dad: all your friends have their own laptop, you should buy too
Me: but i find pc comfortable
Dad: what if you need to work at college? You could carry your laptop to college
Me: dad! Every college have pcs for students to work
Dad: whenever i want to use the pc, i find you there. I never get to use it!
Me: New laptop sounds good to me

Start to work, open laptop, open IDE, open editor, excited for coding, end up with youtube, fuck my life

Late to office due to traffic. Thought would do some work. I get this the second i switch on my laptop. I am so tired of it. I dont want to even rant about it.

when it's the weekend and you forgot your laptop charger at work

I am on holidays and because of devRant I found out about gitLab...
I am sweating and in panic but no one from work called me yet.
Then I realised, this is my first vacation without laptop and work phone in years.

I think I will get back to work 10 days from now and it will like: "Hey!! Can you sit and fix this? We've been waiting for 2 weeks"...

FUUUUUUU!!

How the hell can people actually WORK with these ultra slim ultrabooks with no ports?? My laptop is getting used like a cheap whore at a bachelors party...

This is probably ok... right?

I was on the beach with my work laptop in my backpack in sleep mode. I lifted the backpack and saw water dripping out. The stupid plastic water bottle had failed. Let's hope that my master thesis is still alive. Pray for the HP.

Hm...I would except since COVID started, moved back to my parents, so use my dad's laptop for work... He uses it on weekends.

Friend : I will do this when I get back from work.
Me : But you are working from home, aren't you?
Friend : Yes, but I am at work, right now.
Me: And how does your route back home look like?
Friend : I switch input source from my work's laptop to gaming rig.

My laptop just died today, I can't work on my projects anymore.. pray for me brothers.

My wife left to pick up our oldest kid from school and to later buy her outfits to start ballet.

I work from home, but am still on work hours. I sit on the couch next to our baby that is sleeping.

my wife when she leaves: look, she's asleep, just bring your laptop here and try to work.
me: ok I will

(10 minutes later)
me: ok I'll get the laptop now
me: *get up, pick the laptop, sit down again*
baby: wakes the fuck up

I swear to god this thing has fucking movement sensors.

Don't do like my work supervisor:

Step 1:
*gives task*
Me, starts working on task early in the morning
*task requires his interfering, and is stalled without it*
Me, messages supervisor

Step 2:
*supervisor takes the whole work day to reply, saying that he didn't have time to look into it*

Step 3:
Me, does almost nothing at work the whole day; closes laptop upon seeing the message of the supervisor

Step 4:
Profit: go home early

I was just traveling by train to work, when a group of students joined the carriage.
I opened my laptop to do some work in terminal. After one minute, the guy next to me said to his friends: "oh this guy next to me is hacking!"

Right...... 😑

You can say what you want but cloud services are awesome. I can literally throw my laptop in a bag, travel to the most beautiful place in the world and work from there.

Just got a new work laptop last week. An upgrade from a crappy consumer grade piece of shit to a proper business grade 8c/16t laptop feels good.
Also Fedora.

My windows pro licence got automatically downgraded to home when I turned my laptop on today. Turns out it's a known bug since last month. Just when you think they can't get any worse. Bitlocker doesn't work anymore(only supports pro) and here I'm sitting in front my encrypted drives helplessly.

company: we’ll give you a work laptop
work laptop:

[Developed a script that will trigger beeping sound on any laptop activity like a Skype message or incoming email]

Work for home Routine:

9:00 AM: Wake up, turn on Laptop, connect to Internet, Sleep again.

[doesn't do any work for like 3 days]
"I guess it's about time I got something done"

[opens laptop]

Left my laptop at work... :/ how can I sleep knowing my dear laptop is alone and cold.. feeling sad :(

I run kubuntu on my work laptop with various security settings in place. All of my other colleagues run Windows 10.

My manager recently noticed I wasn't running Windows and told me I was a threat to the security of the companies network...

Congrats dude

Don't fall asleep doing dev work. Your laptop may migrate while you sleep and drop on your foot the next morning as you pull yourself out of bed. 13" MBP at 3 feet vs my foot.

Just now, I managed to compile my first linux kernel for my laptop on the first try :D
Granted, it was just a single line to get my touchpad to work, still a great feeling.
Also, Nvidia is still going strong on my laptop, no problems whatsoever :)

After 1h of work, research, one ugly hack and 2 unexplained laptop power outages i made it. I shrunk down my docker container from 800MB to astonishingly small... 500MB...

In my defense: the python libraries take up 300MB of space.

I'm proud to announce that my work laptop has been officially devRanted!!!

Ps: Boss going to kill me, but fuck him anyway!

Joined a call during a potentially important life event. Work laptop password expired this morning, personal laptop didn't connect to vpn, desktop not connecting to vpn. No one knew what's wrong on the call (just that it's not working).

Not a good call.

My company that I work for now is making me work on my personal laptop for the past 4 months! Like wth! It’s work from home y’all, and you gotta work 24/7 but on your own laptops! A thing came up for a new project, and my laptop doesn’t have enough space for it, they were like, delete your stuff, make space! Wtf! It’s called a personal laptop for a reason!

I shut down my laptop at 1630. After that, I officially no longer give a shit until tomorrow morning. My phone has Slack and Outlook, but neither is allowed to even run in the background. They're there for when I need them, not for when someone a work needs me.

-----During a 6 days official vacation with my family--------
Me: Hey boss, cozz o u, I fucked up my laptop.
Boss: how?
Me: My wife threw it outside the hotel window and I see my laptops pieces now.
....a little pause....
I would love to do more of your work while I am on vacation.(inside my head: motherfucker never ask me to do that again) Do you mind sending me about $5000 so I can buy a laptop here and continue your work?

Woke up from my sleep last night because the solution for a long running bug hit me. In a hurry I ran to my work-desk not too far from the bed and flipped open my laptop so hard I broke the screen.

I’ve sent the laptop for repair but my night was so long I didn’t want to get off because previously I only had one problem but then it doubled.

Does anyone else get this super lazy feeling where you want to write code but you don't wanna have to actually type it? Like I'm here in bed thinking about my projects but I don't wanna grab my laptop and get to work I just wanna think my code into existence.

Dear company, stop installing shit on my work laptop! I guess you love these antivirus and tracking software but I can't do my job with so much slowness.

When the only way to work, is thru a client's laptop, and the client has to be around to use it... F*CK!

Old-ish pic from my setup (back then when you could actually see the desk under all that clutter).
Usually I work from the desktop, but there's also a dockingstation to connect the laptop to the screens and peripherals.

(and yeah I know the speaker placement is horrible)

Wanted a quiet day at work this Monday so updated my development laptop to Ubuntu 16.04. Ended up spending the whole day fixing it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

"Linux is shit because nothing works on my new DOM 2017/2018 laptop!"

Yes it's true that nothing will work if you put your finking ubuntu 14.04 installation with a fucking old 3.13 kernel in your new Laptop!

Update. Your. Fucking. System.

When it's Friday night, you didn't bring you work laptop home with you, have no way of working from home without it, and remember something that might be wrong with your code.
I'm sure I'll forget about it tomorrow.

Home office!

-Everyday PC
-Laptop for the convenient mobility.
-Old Mac Mini for iOS builds.

Here is where I pretend to do work.

Don't you fucking love spending $700 on a laptop only for it to not fucking work and start freezing immediately after turning it on?

My work laptop , a 2015 MacBook Pro, finally bricked today. I put in a request for a 15.6" System76 Oryx tonight. Crossing my fingers!

I only went and left my god damn bag on the train with my work laptop in it (2016 Macbook Pro, started this job 2months ago...). Now I have to get up at 5 fucking 30 am to make a 5 hour round trip to collect it while making up a BS excuse to WFH, or more accurately - work from some cafe in a random city 200 miles away. FML

I resign in a week. I need to turn in my work laptop. Calling it a laptop is a vast overstatement. Its a 2005 Lenovo with 4 gigs of RAM.

Most of my actual work has been on my gaming desktop. My work laptop is in a bag and I haven't seen, smelt or touched it for over a year.

And now I'm scared to open it.

Took me a few hours, but managed to finally run Adobe Photoshop CC 2018 on my old school Toshiba laptop running Arch Linux xD Still needs some work, but super happy I got it running :D

Damn. Forgot Europe uses different plugs to the UK, and on a work trip in France. 3 days without charging the laptop...

Was busy today doing some house work. Everything was normal till afternoon.

Me thinking of using laptop noticed that there was no laptop

My office laptop and another bag was stolen from my home .

It had most of the production details and source code. Running behind police for help now.

Informed my boss too about this incident.

Will update on what happens tomorrow in office.

Fuck that person who stole my office laptop and destroyed my Peace.

I have two laptop bags, one for my laptop, and one for my pillow. I pull the pillow out to scream in it, when I realise there are devs that get to work at devRant, and I have to work with fking bankers

The company I work for insists on having windows on every work laptop although the work I do doesn't require windows. I bought a new hdd, replaced the old one and installed gentoo. Not sure if they could fire me if they found out, however my productivity increased from the first day on.

When your work laptop decides it wants to take 45 minutes to update Monday morning...

(I'm looking at you MacOs...)

To have a work laptop with linux.

Makes a joke about my work laptop im getting that we should all invest in some game development so we need some new laptops (we develop prototype apps to validate ideas for startups and i never work on proper projects). I get to work and see this.. Omw im so happy..

A guy came to me with a laptop that wouldn't boot. After some poking around, I opened the machine just to find everything submerged in coffee. No sh*t your computer doesn't work..

Yay.. laptop won't let me login, work computer won't let me rdp in after restart...this day started fiiiinee... :/

<senior dev turns around..making some small talk about the weather and such.. then>
Senior Dev: “Yea, I’m wanting to take my hard drive out of my desktop and put it in my laptop”
<I know his personal laptop is an older 13.3” dell>
Me: “You have a 2.5” laptop drive in your desktop computer?”
<gives me a very puzzled look>
Senior Dev: “Um…no.”
<second or two of awkward silence>
Me: “Well, a desktop hard drive isn’t going to fit in your laptop.”
<gives me another very puzzled look with a touch of annoyance>
Senior Dev: “It might work.”
<senior dev turns back around>
Why the –bleep- do people talk to me!? Now the rest of the day all I want to do is take his computer away from him…poor thing…that little guy has no idea what his owner wants to do to him .

work from home. desk and pretty much everything with it stolen in family dispute. I'm holding my laptop on a small nightstand. finally got a new pc today at least :/

switched from windows 10 to kubuntu 18.10 (yes it's not arch or gentoo) last week, after the previous system crashed and burned

I had no idea, my laptop can be so fast and work almost entirely without a fan. Live is beautiful again!

"Let's go to buy Laptop for you. You're going to be Computer Engineer"

after 2 months
" What do you do all day spending on laptop?"
"Programing"
"Well, how's that work?"
"It follows some algorithms to get desired output"
"???, Some important files are accidentally deleted from my usb storage. Can you recover those files?"

😮😣

Here is my home setup (I mainly work at home)
Left monitor is for my windows machine, right monitor swaps between my laptop and my PC (depends if I am working or not) laptop running Manjaro with i3 and the tablet on the whiteboard will be used for some monitoring in the future

Don't mind the terrible cable management behind the table :)

I use a MacBook Pro at home and a Windows laptop at work. The trackpad on the Windows laptop is flaky, so I prefer to use it with an external mouse.

However, my desk at home is kind of glossy/reflective, so if I’m working at home on the Windows laptop and trying to use the mouse, it doesn’t work well at all.

Since I don’t actually have a mousepad (I only ever use the trackpad on the MacBook Pro), I started looking around the house for something I could use instead that would make the mouse work better. I needed something large, rectangular, non-reflective, heavy enough that it wouldn’t slide around the desk as I moved the mouse...

Bought flowers and right now they're right next to the laptop. The laptop is looking so pretty!

My desk is also looking scenic and shit, that if flowers were cheaper I'd make a flower crown for every robot I work with. Lol.

Currently using a Windows laptop at work and have been given the option for a Mac. Should I make the switch?

"Our central servers firewall has been breached" - Doesn't even work on a server or anything, just his laptop

"How many proxies do we have left?"

"Around 10.200"

I don't take responsibility for any brain damage

Yesterday I had to start the windows 10 partition on my work laptop in order to use a shitty conference call software that works only on Windows. Windows decided that it was time to upgrade the system without asking me, so it deleted grub from the MBR, and destroyed my Linux partition (I had to recover it from a backup sector and it was full of errors).
Result: I wasted my morning fixing the laptop.
Thank you Microsoft.

I walked into work this morning and before I even pulled my laptop out of my bag a PM asked if I could make a "quick change" for a client 😑

Explaining why I need something installed on my work laptop in a request ticket: BECAUSE IT LOOKS COOL

@localhost my work set up. Work Laptop with dual screen on the left, home PC with devRant open on the right xD

While my manager whos daily work involves docs, meetings is rocking with highly speced Laptop.

And here I am working on a really old and out of date laptop spending half of my day waiting for things to finish... 😕

So I work on Embedded System. While working on my project I was drinking water from bottle.

And kept it near my laptop.

Just there all my circuits were open. Connected via USB with my laptop.
And while working I tried grab the bottle and guess what?
Yeah, It fell. But thankfully it didn't touch any of my circuits. If it did!!!!

I was frozen on spot.
Phew!!

I've never coded (for work) on vacation. I just turn off my work laptop and my work phone. So I can spend the first week of back to work for going through my email & messages.

I'm not irreplaceable and I work with competent people. (At least that's my goal at work.)

"Oh you work in IT? You know my laptop doesn't work. Can you fix it?"

When it's beautiful summer weather outside, but you can't work outdoors because your laptop-screen is not coated, hence you can't see shit

Anyone else hate their Macbook Pro 2018? RIGHT after the return policy the speakers start acting like it has fucking tourette's, plus my machine randomly SHUTS DOWN.

Apple Store "Genius": "Yup, we gotta send it in for repair, 10 business days."

10 business days without my work laptop, gee thanks asshole, at least be a little more empathetic about it.

My 2015 Macbook Pro gave me ZERO problems. The only reason why I upgraded was that compiling took forever (React Native).

If I didn't have to work with Xcode I would just sell this thing and buy a PC laptop. (The Surface book looks nice =))

When you run the W11 update checker, and it doesn't tell you to buy a new laptop 🤨

Shit, now I need to work out how to stop it updating.

mind you, I always wanted to watch TikTok from my taskbar, win-win right?

I got home from my day job today to work on a side client's project that is due tonight.

Realized I'd left my laptop with all my setup for the project at the office.

My Chromebook Pixel 2015 died yesterday. *sniff* I really liked the build quality and using crouton for Linux.

My 2nd work laptop ever was a IBM Thinkpad and I really liked that back in the day.

Now I'm looking at the Thinkpad 25th anniversary edition. Anyone have one? Thoughts?

And here's my dangerously comfortable-and-close-from-the-playstation work setup. In a basement...

Saw some desk pic yesterday; here's mine at home. Mostly for gaming, but I do some work occasionally at it. Laptop's setup so I can monitor some Asterisk servers at work.

Gaming rig is:
4690k@4.5ghz
16gb RAM
GTX 980
Acer 24in 1080p 144hz Gsync monitor

Laptop:
2009 MacBook Pro
2.53ghz Core 2 Duo
8gb RAM
SSD

aaarghh i left my laptop at home and now im bored as hell at work. i had things planned out for today and now i cant do them cause i dont have my laptop with me for 2 hours. the computers at work dont have everything i need :(

Pi ->wifi -> laptop -> bluetooth PAN -> phone -> LTE
Will this work properly? Let's find out!

My previous job. My first day at work. I get my laptop and I start walking to my office. My PM intercepts me and starts harassing me about our team being late. She ignored the fact that I had not even manage to turn the laptop on yet!

For a moment I thought work laptop died because the screen suddenly went pitch black but it was just Windows deciding it was a good time to update graphics drivers. It crashed the emulator I was running btw.

work laptop without admin permissions to install anything, like a text editor, or IDE

why couldn't i have been born to a rich family instead of being a wageslave

Came into work this morning and my scrum master has decided to take my desk and now I'm working off my laptop screen. I forgot he needed 3 displays for Excel, Outlook and JIRA.

Was very excited to receive my new work laptop. Everything is in French and I don't even have admin rights!
I guess they trust me with writing SW for their cars but when it comes to customising my own pc a team of IT guys should supervise me.

Manager: Good news, company will pay for extra internet cost while we work from home.

Employee: Will the cost of electricity consumed by the laptop be reimbursed?

:|

I've stopped bringing my laptop to work. They gave me a pc that has 2 gb ram. What should I do now? 😐

Some years ago but it's funny.
The company give to me a new laptop with windows Home Edition,
After few months I have installed Pro Version.
1 month later the laptop didn't work anymore, nothing on display, no beeps, zero.
Tried to replace ram and check but nothing works.
The CTO asked the supplier and they asked about SO, and they said it's not turning ON because i have installed Windows Pro.
Than the CTO had a brilliant idea: try put the hard disk in another laptop and install Windows Home, and put back in the defective one. I refused to to that, it's stupid and he insisted, then I put the laptop in his desk and I said: if you want do this you can do, im not stupid enough to do this.
He got really mad, 1 week later i got a brand new one 😅

Rainy days are when I'll program with one monitor. I'll bring my laptop to bed, sprawl out on my heated blanket, brew some tea; and work on side projects

Been on winter holiday for 3 days. Went to log in to my work laptop to clear out email - took me 20 minutes to remember my domain password.

Getting old sucks, kids.

I only have one laptop monitor to myself at home, so I overcompensate at work.

Also, my phone has a potato camera.

Decided to ditch chromium when installing Linux on my work laptop for the first time, and stick to Firefox and DDG. No regrets, it works great!!

I am getting a new laptop today so I'll have an option to work remotely (if needed).. yay?!

All of a sudden every engineer at my work is a biochemist and talking about how the world is ending due to the Coronavirus.

Shut up. Wash your hands. Wipe down your laptop keyboard. Don't lick your hands after touching a surface. Don't touch your face. Just be cautious.

Saving to buy a Mac.

I'm a full stack developer: I do Web Development, Backend Development.

Not a graphic designer but I use Photoshop and Illustrator to modify assets that I receive clients.

What is a good budget Mac Laptop that I can hang on for most of my work ?

I've been waiting a long time friend this. It's a shame I can't stick it on my work laptop, but my home laptop just got a lotta bling <3

A bunch of buddies in my city are waiting for it too, but I think I got em first. #bragging_rights

Thanks! @dfox, @trogus

I just set up my 8 year old nephews new (very old) laptop with elementary OS. Took the chance to explain a bit about operating systems and how computers and programs are made and how they work. He is very interested. I'm excited to have a new apprentice!

I invested in a brand new 27" curved monitor to work more efficiently with my laptop but now
HDMI isn't recognized by my linux distro on dual boot where it works perfectly with fucking windows and it used to work nice before the latest update
Tried to install official nvidia drivers to try to fix that
🙃 Guess who has a fucked up X configuration now 🙋🏾‍♂️

"If you're going to be living in the office, you can at least be on time for work"

This sums my mornings since i started working from home..
8:55 get out of bed
9:00 open laptop....and I'm at work :|

Time for late night coding, debugging, thinking..been busy since I woke up, work, college, exams, work..work while waiting for an exam..

Coffee - check
Cigarettes - check
Music to keep me motivated - check
Laptop still not lagging - check
Will probably want to sleep in couple of hours - check

Now everyone were sharing their worksetup I thought I would want too to.
So here it is.
I have two laptops (one belongs to startup I work at) I use same keyboard mouse for both using synergy.
I have my editor and node server in one laptop and I check them out on other laptop (both are medium range laptop hence they are not exactly powerful). I am running Linux mint in both.

Then I have some embedded stuff on desk which is my hobby(currently working on esp8266 dev board that I built).

You can also see a projector clock I built projecting current time on left beside my bigger laptop. (Projection is on wall beside it)

✓ running server on windows 10

✓ running postgresql server

✓ running ngrok server

✓ running android studio

✓ running 15 chrome tabs

✓ running ubuntu virtualbox

✓ scraping a website with python in ubuntu

✓ laptop freezes

✓ gently slam the laptop so it can go to sleep mode

✓ try to login so it can unfreeze

✓ get a purple screen of death

✓ system crashed and has to restart

✓ get a blue screen of death for memory diagnostic tool

✓ all unsaved work is lost

✓ gtx 1060

✓ i7

✓ ddr4

✓ 8gb ram

✓ acer laptop of $2400

✓ regret buying acer laptop

Took company's laptop to vacations, because it's lighter then may gaming laptop rig.

VPN works seemlessly, all my intranet work is accessible even away from the country >.<

I guess I'm a bit of a work junkie / bitch ?

😮
*doing my work silently*
*SUDDENLY THERE'S A FOSS, PPL RUN OUT THEIR HOUSES*
*still on the laptop*
-"what? Earth quake?"
*back on the work*

PS: anyways, anyone from around Tehran sensed any quakes?

Yay!!! New laptop is finally here. Doing some setup for work.
Fuck my internet btw

I've finally got a monitor at work that works with Samsung Dex.
Positive things:
- new super cool monitor
- can remove windows now from the dual boot of the laptop since everything I needed it for can be now done on Dex.

Negative things:
- DevRant doesn't work with Dex. It just doesn't load properly. But maybe it will work through a browser. Need to test...

I specifically asked my employer when fix time is, whether I get a work laptop, and whether WFH is optional, because

- I'm a night owl and don't function until 10am
- my personal laptop is slow as shit and I don't want to put Windows on it
- I don't have a decent chair at home yet

- client team agreed on fix time starting an hour before what's in my contract, and PM made it clear that they expect to be able to call us an hour before and two hours after (that's what fix time means unless I misunderstand)
- I got a crap backup laptop after a week of moaning, with promise of a better one two weeks from now
- I won't get an RFID card for weeks, so I effectively can't enter or leave the client offices

only took about 50 millennia, but i finally have windows 1903 on my work laptop... without exaggeration, took about 25 hours over three days to update, with two failures
someone end my existence, please and thank you

We have 7000+ employees and I'm the only one who do dev work. IT had special meetings how to handle my requests. In the end they told me to buy a separate laptop and keep it outside the network. Suits me fine :)

I got back from my holiday, back to work, and have spent 20 minutes of every hour at work waiting for my laptop to build while I navigate this “codebase” to put a teeny feature change in. A one liner.

Honestly everything about this makes me want to cry.

Been working on some projects that will hopefully train me for work projects on my personal laptop. Ever since my reinstall there has been a crap-ton of screen tear.

Looking at BIOS today...32 MB video ram out of 8Gb...

Today I flew from London to Glasgow and had to carry my laptop in my suitcase since I don't have a proper laptop bag. Was extremely nervous the whole time even though I cushioned it as much as possible. Then I get home and on CSS tricks I see this on the screen and freak out thinking my screen got messed up. Turns out it's my adblocker doing work :D

Wanted to have Samsung Dex for work, so I can run office on it and kick windows from my dual boot laptop.
Dex pad was on sale.
Bought it.
Brought it to work.
Work monitor doesn't have hdmi.
...
fuck. <.<
I'll ask the technician later if he either has a monitor flying around he doesn't need or an adapter or something.

Week started of great.... :/

I always leave my laptop at work, except this weekend. Guess what I forgot to bring to work today....

It's ok, I didn't want to take my laptop to work anyway...

So I work at this company that is constantly making events and conferences to ease the coexistence between the developers on different projects, the thing is, I don't really care about it, I'd just be happy if I was left alone with my laptop to code all day.

Any thoughts?

I need to buy a laptop to replace my 5 year old one. My work is mostly in data science. My budget is really flexible. Any suggestions?

Resolve to leave laptop at home on a long weekend vacation away to force yourself to relax and not work on anything. Spend parts of weekend thinking: "this would be the perfect spot/cafe to work on the snail simulation!"

I have decided. On my laptop for work Im gonna switch over to Ubuntu in April.

Im gonna say farewell windows for webdevelopment.

Me, who is renowned for starting work at 10, opening my laptop to see a meeting in progress that started at 9:30. "Whelp, hope nobody expected shit from me in that". Meeting then went on for another 45 minutes and I had to talk about stuff.

Really irritating when you work with a windows shitty laptop dual booted with ubuntu and the computer starts fucking up exactly when it shouldn't..

after aprox ~1 year of using ubuntu with gnome and countless UI inconsistencies (and not to mention memory leaks left and right) I finally gave up and successfully managed to hackintosh my work laptop ... here's another reason why :(

Keyboard in my laptop died, mobo issue. Work gave me an ex-lease Dell E6430s. First thing I did was dual boot with Ubuntu 16.10 - can't believe how smooth it was. When I put Debian on my Lenovo G570 I had a ton of issues. I love Linux.

Are you using your own laptop at work? Or your company provides you with a company laptop? I use my own at work because I don't like to develop using company windows desktop.

Am I the only one who's always scared out of my mind that there is gonna be some real hard ass purno blasting through my laptop speakers whenever I open it at work in the morning?

left work last night at 4am, leaving the laptop at the office disgustes. now i feel insecure for leaving it there on a sunday

Got my stickers and did a ballsy move and stuck them on my work laptop !!

Reasons not to work here...
Windoze
Insurance
One line scripts with no help option
Java
Windoze
5am meetings, working 10 hours a day then getting on again between 9pm and 5am, to accommodate for employees in India
WINDOZE

Edit - can't forget the worst laptop track pad in history 😂

Why do corporate douchebags keep hiring fucking cheap ass local hardware companies? What is this mysterious fucking attraction they have towards shitty IT?

My fucking phone literally has more RAM than my work laptop. I want to go home earlier just so I can get some actual work done on my non retarded personal laptop.

Best work I have ever done was done on a beach, in a lounge chair with a beer in my hand and laptop on the lap.

Dude at work floats the idea of creating separate Github accounts for personal and work for security. My response:

While we're discussing options, we should also consider maintaining a list of users as a CSV^H^H^H MS Excel file, and install an authentication server that runs off the laptop of an "IT Administrator". That way it'll be super secure because hackers cannot access any system outside of working hours, as well as the days that said admin is off from work.

Do you guys take your main laptop with you on vacation / travel abroad?

I can't afford to lose my laptop. Every work is saved in it. Some important files have been backed up to cloud. But that's it.

Can't risk getting it damaged or stolen or taken in custody when abroad.

But, if something in my server fucks up when I'm abroad, i want to be able attend it and get it addressed.

I'm thinking of buying a low cost portable laptop to use incase an emergency situation happens.

How do you guys manage such situation?

Video social calls are the absolute worst. I have a shitty Intel 11 series chip in my laptop; which is a waste of sand. My laptop often slows to a crawl on calls, so I can't work on things, and I have to listen to them all prattle on about kids and things I don't care at all about. Sometimes we play games, which is tolerable. My company is international and 100% remote, so this will never end so long as I work for them.

Day 3 of following a ServiceNow request so peasant me gets to have Visual Studio installed on the work laptop

I need to provide them with a "business justification" for it + even more approval emails

The red tape is insane.

Is it better to buy a cheap laptop and work by remote connecting to a powerful PC, or to just buy a powerful laptop?

context:
I like playing video games, I also sometimes program using Visual Studio + Unity which is also pretty heavy. Because of this I know I need a powerful machine.

my thoughts:
Now I could buy a "gaming" laptop, It's portable (useful for LAN-parties) but it's expensive and doesn't last as long as a PC.

I could also buy a powerful PC with a cheap used laptop, I could do most work on this laptop and if I need to do something more powerful I could remote to my PC.
But this would require internet at all times and i'm worried that working over remote might not be the smoothest experience.

So glad i moved from a desktop PC to a laptop for development. I still have 2 workstations (one at home and one at work) with 3 screens, mechanical keyboard + mouse. But if i ever have to demo to a client/PM i just un-dock and take my laptop to them. Plus if the office is loud i just go to another room.

Okay, guys, please help me. My stickers arrived but the laptop I'm currently working on is shitty. So I'm afraid of putting them on the laptop, because maybe I won't work with it anymore in a year or so. Where should I put them??? :/

Spent an hour trying to figure out why Chrome wouldn't work at all. Even IE was working on my laptop.
Restarted the whole thing.
Now it works.....and I already lost most of my motivation to code. Just great...

And this early Friday leave from work is brought to you by Microsoft.

(I did triggered the first one, but I forgot my laptop had a pending update so it's not totally windows fault)

project-manager : what are you doing ?

me : just having some coffee .

project-manager : stop all shit go to work .

me : ok sir . got up and went for my laptop .

my mother screamed at me and screamed "what
are you doing ?"

i then realised it all a night_mare

A while ago I ranted about my laptop at work which was unable to install a Windows update. After several attempts I have the laptop to our IT department, but they also weren’t be able to install these update. So it seems that I order a new laptop this year.

Fuck!
I have overwritten some files that make my WiFi-module work and I can't reinstall it, because that doesn't fucking work!! (Ethernet is also giving up on me😢)

NOW I HAVE TO FUCKING REINSTALL FUCKING UBUNTU, BUT MY LAPTOP WON'T BOOT FROM THE FUCKING USB!!!!

Hi,
every day I turn my laptop at work, I have to run like more than 10 programs in order to start working.
I have a question, anyone know how if there is a way make custom set of programs to run by just a click, this is really being annoying

Getting a new laptop is exhausting if you haven't been keeping up with the technology. I have purchased three laptops in the last two weeks returning the first two after spending 10 + hours each installing updates and software just to find out they didn't work for what I needed.

Even though I mainly work as a backend developer at work or in my side projects, my little pleasure is to follow instagram accounts that publish awesome interfaces and dreaming that one day, I'll get to integrate something like that

Tonight I'm trying to integrate a basic interface for a friend, it looks so gross from a 15.6" laptop computer I want to end myself

Bought a Dell laptop, didn't work properly. Returned, got another one. The second one has the same issues.
Why? It's been two months and fuck ton of stress, can't recommend Dell to anyone.

I'll probably get my money back and buy laptop that works as intended.

Gentle reminder to avoid working on personal projects from your work laptop.

Ignore if your prudence is above the baseline.

For people working as consultants, have you been asked to provide your own equipment (laptop and accessories) for work? if yes, how do you bill them for it?

My laptop got an update and now nothing will load, they all just go blank and show the "not responding" message. It's incredibly frustrating because I couldn't work on my HTML project yesterday.

Fuck, I just found out that I have to replace the (pooled) company laptop, which I sometimes take home with me to continue some (work related) side projects, by myself if something happens to it.

Team lead asks me why I do that .... Because I am stupid enough to invest some spare time to get more valuable for the company, asshole.

And this is also the reason why I asked for a personal laptop as workstation several weeks ago... You dumbfuck

Nothing like having your hands full with work projects, then getting a message from your, not so technically knowledgeable, dad, which says that he's going to remove linux from your old laptop and replace it woth windows.

By himself.....

Tried talking him out of it, but je's adamant about it.

Should I call an ambulance?

I also feel really bad for my old laptop now

Found a use for my stickers (not allowed to use on my work laptop)!
Can now tell the difference between mine and my partners when we play Pokémon GO. 🙃

Continuing my saga, I'm now tasked with creating a .NET Web Form app and then converting it to ASP.NET Core as a proof of concept.
Problems:
- Web Forms are not supported in Core and are not planned to
- After 3 weeks I still do not have a work laptop
-- My personal laptop is a Chrome book running Linux
--- I can't install VS2017 on my laptop, I need it for this project.
- Working from home, where I have the resources available, is apparently against company policy (I'm not 100% on this yet, can't find it myself)
- I'm likely going to be sent back to the offline computer lab at a different location to work on this, where I doubt the programs/packages are installed

Perfect.

RSA is the best. It's so secure it even keeps me out of my laptop most work days!

</Sarcasm>

Fml how am I supposed to get any work done like this....

Work From Home
I was in kitchen , my client messaged me and in hurry to reply her back , rushing towards my laptop, I fell and got bruises on my knee :(

Will take atleast one week to heel

Here’s my setup, a little late. I use the dual monitors with my work computer and laptop + monitor for personal computer.

devRant delivers! Thank you guys :)
Now, which sticker should adorn my work laptop, and which one is for my personal laptop?

The struggle when you have to work on your muscle memory every time you get a new laptop/keyboard. For extremists - using someone else's keyboard/setup to do a code fix.

So that laptop I got for R100 can do 4k... like wow..

For those who missed the first rant, we had an auction at work and I bought and old HP Elitebook for R100 which about the same as what a Big Mac meal costs...

And here's mine setup. All HP and mouse from Microsoft :D

SharePoint dev / admin

I hate having to use Windows 10 for work 😭

And the laptop doesn't have an HDMI port and also doesn't connect to my monitor using an adapter 😕

I live share to my mac as a workaround, but that has its own problems :/

9pm I REALLY needed to get some work done... Head was dropping like a nodding dog at my laptop... Gave up and went to bed.... Now its after 2am and I've been watching YouTube for 5 hours and still awake.... Just what even....

I just noticed a five hour old mail on my work laptop. The notification was BEHIND all windows!

Hi everyone!

I don't know if there is a one size fits all solution, but could get me some pointers on how to make built in laptop webcam work with linux mint 18.2?

I have this friend who says that using bootstrap(prebuilt css styles) is freeloading if other people’s work. So, I asked him to create his own OS cause he is freeloading of Apple create his own laptop cause he his freeloading Apple. What an Idiot!

Does anyone knows a Syncing / Self Hosted Cloud Solution that has native Integration for Windows and Ubuntu?
I want some shared storage between my Laptop and my PC. Save a project on one side, grab the laptop goes to a friend and work there with the data, without uploading / downloading the files manually or using some web interface for that.

I have also a root server with stroage and internet. So if it happens automagicly in background it would be fine.

Is there a good solution out there? Or some ideas / frameworks to programm it by myself?

Diff and merges are not needed. I never will work on both systems at the same time.