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Buy it, use it, break it, fix it
Trash it, change it, mail - upgrade it
Charge it, point it, zoom it, press it
Snap it, work it, quick - erase it
Write it, cut it, paste it, save it
Load it, check it, quick - rewrite it
Plug it, play it, burn it, rip it
Drag and drop it, zip - unzip it
Lock it, fill it, call it, find it
View it, code it, jam - unlock it
Surf it, scroll it, pause it, click it
Cross it, crack it, switch - update it
Name it, rate it, tune it, print it
Scan it, send it, fax - rename it
Touch it, bring it, pay it, watch it
Turn it, leave it, start - format it10 -
I was pressued to shift the blame.
We received an angry email from a customer that some of their data had disappeared. The boss assigns me to this task. This feature is relatively new and we've found some bugs in the past in here. I go through request logs, search the database, run some diagnostics, etc. for about 5 hours and I cannot find the problem. I focus on the bugs that we've had before but they don't seem to be the problem.
I tell the boss "sorry but I checked XYZ and I can't find the problem. I'm out of ideas." But the boss wanted answers by the end of the day. They did not want to admit to the client that we couldn't figure out what's wrong.
By now I was more pressured to find an answer, find something or someone to blame it on, not exactly to find the real solution. So I made up some BS:
"Sometimes, in HTML forms, the number inputs allow you to change the number by scrolling. We have some long forms where the user has to scroll. Perhaps the focus remained on the number input, so when they scrolled down they accidentally changed the number they meant to input."
The boss was happy with that. We explained this to the customer, and there's now a ticket to change type="number" to type="text" in our HTML forms and to validate it in th backend.
A week later another customer shows us a different error. This one is more clear because it had a stack trace, but I realise that this error is what caused our last error. It was pretty obscure, mind you, the unit tests didn't detect it.
I didn't tell the boss that they were connected tho.
With two angry clients in two weeks, I finally convinced the boss to give us more time to write more unit tests with full coverage. -
An ancient legend goes that there exists sacred knowledge that enables anyone possessing it not to turn one’s career into a constant uphill battle with the management.
I sought this knowledge, I travelled the world, to no avail. Once upon a time, I climbed the Mount Fuji and met the wizard in his pagoda on the mount. I won in a CSS-golf battle with him, and he revealed the sacred truth: one need to chose companies that do business instead of constant backroom deals and dick-measuring contests.
Like Prometheus, I give this knowledge to you. An ancient scroll says that for this I’ll be chained to the mountain of PHP legacy code, and HRs will peck my brain for eternity, but I found Arachne, the queen of HRs, and exchanged the keto-diet secret for freedom.1 -
Devs: Can we please get adequate hardware to do our job correctly? Please, just a new set of larger monitors.
Lower management: Sure, this is going to be easy.
Upper management: Wait what? This will cost us around 500€ times 10? Any maybe in the end other departments will want that to, so make it times 100.
We're a 4+ billion company ... but yes, please, I love scroll bars and they make my work so much faster.4 -
I'm forced by my job to use this fucking unusable piece of horse shit also know as a Windows operating system.
And it's not only that I have experienced every fucking corner case bug that is possible to occur in our universe.
Not only that that for last 2 years I seen more blue screen than blue sky.
Not only that forced updates fucked my schedules so many times that now I'm really *afraid* to turn off my computer off because I have zero guarantee that I will be able to restart it in a reasonable amount of time.
No, neither of those broke me.
The thing that kills me everyday is, piece by piece ...
WHY THE FUCK THERE IS NO SINGLE, USEABLE, SANE TERMINAL EMULATOR ON WINDOWS
I JUST WANT TO TYPE SOME COMMANDS, COPY/PASTE TEXT AND SCROLL
IS IT TO MUCH ?????
FUCK CMD
FUCK POWERSHELL
FUCK WSL
FUCK ALL THOSE WANKY THIRD-PARTY EMULATORS
FUCK EVERY-COMMAND-LINE-REALATED THING ON WINDOWS
FUCKING USLESS SHIT
CANT EVEN DO SOME SSH COPY/PASTE SHIT
WITHOUT SOME WEIRD CHARACTERS POPING OUT EVERYWHERE.
AND FUCK THAT EVERY ONE OF THOSE MUST HAVE TOTTALY DIFFERENT SET OF KEY SHORTCUTS
AND THAT FUCKING BELL
WHY WOULD YOU EVEN PUT A FUCKING BELL SOUND AS DEFAULT SETTING ??
GO TO HELL MICROSOFT
I WANT MY LINUX BACK7 -
I am currently under a desperate crunch at work, trying to get things wrapped up before my honeymoon.
Of course, this is when My Greatest User decides he will come to my office no fewer than five times today. Not once was it for an actual, legitimate issue that he had not created himself. Here were the top three for today:
#3
MGU: "The scroll wheel on my mouse isn't working. I used to be able to scroll stuff with it but now I can't."
ME: *Looks at his mouse. All looks well.*
ME: "Show me what you're trying to do."
MGU: "I'm trying to scroll this Word document. See? It won't scroll!"
ME: ..."That's because there is nothing to scroll... The entire document is on your screen..."
#2
MGU: "I can't move my mouse off the edge of my screen! I used to be able to move it from my monitor to my laptop screen and I can't do it anymore!"
ME: "Did you move your laptop?"
MGU: "Yeah I moved it to the other side of the monitor. That shouldn't make a difference, should it?"
#1
MGU: "You know the DOS commands?"
ME: *Does a triple take.* ... ... "Huh?"
MGU: "The DOS commands. You know how you can use DOS commands to make the computer do stuff. Like Ctrl+M."
ME: "Ah. You're talking about keyboard shortcuts."
MGU (ignoring me): *Goes on a long, confusing explanation of something he's trying to do in Outlook and wants to know a keyboard shortcut for instead of clicking.*
ME: "I don't know what the shortcut for that would be and honestly I don't have time to look right now. I really need to keep working on this project."
MGU: "You don't know?"
ME: "Nope."
MGU: "Oh... I'd have thought that with being a programmer you'd have gotten into the DOS commands."
I have never been so tempted to quit. -
A few years ago my boss held a brainstorming meeting to go over features for an internal reporting app. I brought up we should have related business news stories scroll on the page header like Fox business or something. He laughed and said sure. Two things happened after that.
1. Found out the marquee tag still works in chrome.
2. Yeah you bet I put that shit in there.
Anyways a meeting was held a few days after where my boss chewed me out for actually doing it. He showed the app to his boss and got laughed at by his leadership team when they saw news headlines scroll over analytics graphs.
After writing this I realize this is more his embarrassment than mine. Have a great Tuesday fam.7 -
Semantic bug:
Updooting someone's rants until you scroll down and realize they're the same person who said a moronic thing you have already downdooted in the past.
Then contemplating if you should take all the updoots back. 😐5 -
devRant is messed up!
I often open the app (iOS), see a rant that I want to read, tap on it, and the app crashes.
Now I almost got used to that shit but for some reason when I open the app again, that rant that I wanted to read is gone! Never to be found again!
No matter how often I reload, how much I scroll down, it’s simply gone.
This annoys me more than it should maybe. But seriously, wtf is wrong with this platform? I don’t know if it’s only the iOS app but so many other things are broken here, it’s disturbing. And those problems are there for many years, nobody seems to care. 😩
Don’t get me wrong, I like devRant. It’s the only social platform that I use. But… ugh…13 -
Come on devRant! I’m getting really annoyed when clicking on rant that has [read more] at the end since it is a gamble to kill this iOS app you have made. Every ~5th click I get app terminated. Then after I reenter the app, I lost where I was. Thats why I ++ all the rants I have read, even those who don’t deserve it :), so I can scroll quickly and see which are not ++’ed.3
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You
know
what
I
love
?
When
rants
/
posts
are
really
long
and
devRant
makes
me
scroll
down
on
the
front
page
every
time
I
come
back
from
a
rant
.
Not sure if this will actually
show and sorry, kinda~8 -
Definition of code reviews in our company:
"Part of work that requires you to scroll to the bottom of the page and click accept button. Looking the changes is optional."4 -
Future01
Click, click, click, click.
Tap, tap, tap, tap.
Swipe, swipe, swipe, swipe,.
Scroll, scroll, scroll, scroll.
I’m tired of living on popularity driven planet among animals, where number of clicks on likes, subscriptions and links are worth more than iq, education and experience.
Let’s face it - AI is showing us traffic driven recommendations that sucks. If you’re hooked up to social network and can’t disconnect from it you’re half way to matrix. You probably also disagree with me cause you’re serotonin junkie. You can’t stop like you can’t stop eating for a day. Bubble have you in your hands and whatever you do you probably won’t wake up. To be honest most of us won’t. It’s already to late.
I’m waiting for meta so they can put you in virtual world where you can have what you want and at the same time own nothing. They will put you in some small empty space and give you something to eat how many times you want so you can feel safe and click, tap, swipe, scroll more so they can own this planet.
You will be living only to deliver corporate metadata and you will be happy, cause they will make you happy with giving you emotions that you want to feel at exact moment.
If you get out, you won’t be able to interact cause you won’t know how to behave, you will become wild animal.
By going out you will break the law, cause outside world will be long gone. To move to bar or visit family you will travel with autonomous vehicle that have screens instead of windows.
Eventually you stop going to bar cause it’s unhealthy, you stop going outside cause there’s deadly virus and you can die.
They will take you last thing later with birth control so you can have baby whenever you want and with who you want as long as both parties agree by signing baby nft contract, you don’t have to take care of your baby and be pregnant cause it will be robotized, you will see your baby in meta. You will think you feel it using robot hands.
You will never meet your baby in person.
That’s how matrix will start. We’re half way.6 -
Is this really android 12? My phone is stuck at android 9, and I'm using simulator to test an app but wtf is this? its like the cheap copy of an iPhone settings :S
What is this even the stretching when we hit edge of scroll :S
This thing looks like when Windows Phone meets iOS
9 -
i hate you, you and you AHHHHHH
This doesnt have to make sense.
This is a freakin rant for god's sake, not a pull request. I'm not tryna be the best ranter?? Dont mind this rant. Just scroll. B if u can only hear my scream right now from the other side of the world, it sure can cause another big bang.
F u, this sht, (oh ya it's profanity, i got no better term for what im feelin, gahh please rip my head off) and that too, and this one too, all of u
I HATE ALL OF YOU. I BLAME ALL OF YOU FOR ALL MY INCONSISTENCIES. YE, IM TIRED OF TAKING ACCOUNTABILITY. F THAT SHT COZ IT JUST RAISES EXPECTATIONS. I CAN'T EVEN MEET THE DEADLINES I SET FOR MYSELF.
The hell are ambitions and all that "dream life" they tryna sell. Those won't even matter when I can barely get my sht together. UGH. I haven't even seen my friends, the SUN, trees and all normal people things. Dang, I want fried chicken. I haven't had one for a while. I guess I should end this rant here and order one.
I must just be hungry, no?3 -
Anybody else got this weird little glitch?
Steps to reproduce:
1. Scroll down until the header darkens
2. Hover over any of the header options
3. Scroll up until the header becomes transparent but not fully
Notes:
- Can't use a screenshotting tool, the refresh fixes the glitch
- Can't select the element in devtools, glitch disappears
8 -
You know those mice that go "clunk clunk clunk clunk" when you scroll?
Can you really trust someone who makes a decision to use something like that?14 -
Batteries don't like me anymore
Yesterday late evening I was out to bring a festive parcel to someone. I left home with 29% batt, went there and still had 27%. Made 3 short (~1min) calls and headed home. Opened Firefox and my phone crashed. WTF, how could FF crash Android? OS separation failure? I turn my phone back on and it says LOW BATTERY: 0%. wtf... With 27% I should have been good until the next morning with no problems! And now it went 27%→0% in a blink (literally).
Today I decided to stay on my lappy for the morning. YT videos to catch up to, dR posts to scroll through, etc. A few hours later laptop battery is drained down to 29%. I step away for a few minutes for a cup of coffee and when I come back - the battery indicator LED is glowing amber and OS says it's got 6% left
29%→6% in a few moments of idle. Riigghhhhttt.... And I thought I won't want anything for this Christmas.
I wonder what's the significance of 27/29% there...3 -
anyone else having this weird bug that when you scroll down under a rant, nothing happens and scroll bar grows to infinity? (only tested in firefox, rambox)
when i manually scroll very fast i might "skip" this behavior and actually be able to scroll through comments under a rant, but when i scroll up too much it jumps to the top again. ^^'
if required, i can upload a meaningless, blurry video filmed with my phone in catastrophe mode (portrait)2 -
It's CSS quick maffs time! Consider the following code:
<div class='container flex'>
<nav class='menu flex'>
<a href='#'>Menu item 1</a>
(arbitrary amount of links)
</nav>
<button type='button'>Sign in</button>
</div>
You want the layout to look like a horizontally scrolling, single line menu with a Sign in button to the right. Both container and menu are flex containers. So, here's the code for the menu:
.menu {
overflow: auto;
}
The problem is, as there is no flex-wrap, menu will not be wrapped, and it will occupy all the space it's needed to accommodate all the elements, breaking its container. Pesky horizontal scroll appears on the whole body.
Boubas will set menu's width to some fixed value like 800px, and this is a bouba approach because bye-bye responsiveness.
Here's what you should do:
.menu {
overflow: auto;
min-width: 0;
}
.menu * {
flex-shrink: 0;
}
This way, menu will occupy exactly the width of an empty div. In flexbox, its width will be equal to all free space that is not occupied by the Sign in button. Setting flex-shrink is needed for items to preserve their original width. We don't care about making those items narrower on narrower screens, because we now have infinite amount of horizontal real estate. Pure, inherent responsiveness achieved without filthy media queries, yay!
The menu will scroll horizontally just like you wanted.
aight bye14 -
I wonder if crypto exchanges are so damn vulnerable or just so transparent.
I mean, it is impossible to scroll tech articles for more than a few seconds before stumbling on a report of yet another crypto exchange being nicked a couple hundred mil USD.
- It could be that their security severely sucks (wouldn't blame them for it, most businesses do suck at securing shit).
- It could be that the entire black hat community is putting it's might on stealing money that is so fucking easy to launder.
- It could be that is damn nigh impossible to cover up a crypto hack since the evidence of coins drifting away is forever on display in the public ledger, and in that case crypto companies are not hacked more often than regular companies, they are just much more often publically shamed for it.
- It could be a mix of all the above, but my intuition is that one factor is more relevant.
Which would be the most relevant factor? One of the above or yet another attack vector to the stupidest value conduit ever?4 -
I hate those websites that paint within one second and then it takes two seconds to load all the other assets. It seems bare minimum to me. Idk about you all but I would rather have it loaded in three seconds instead of me trying to scroll immediately and thinking my computer is going to crash from the low framerate.7
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Typora was the best (closed-source) free markdown editor. As soon as it hit the first stable release, it became non-free. Luckily, you can still download the last beta from https://typora.io/releases/all (click Dev/Beta releases -> scroll down to 'More Beta')
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Using the Devrant iOS app Incan't scroll down to load more posts. Is that intentional?
At least I cannot do it while using filters. My "front page" uses some filters and I can only see 10 posts. When I scroll down hoping to load more posts I attempt to "drag den to load more" but the app doesn't load more posts. I just see a spinner that vanished.
Bug or feature?2 -
@scriptcoded my poor vaginal eyes ! All I can do is look away or scroll past ! But I'm your number on fan !3
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