"I wrote the code, I have to maintain the code, I wont need any comments"

*some months later*

Always remember boys & girls:

when you maintain someone's code?

Friend(non dev): Hey. Do you know how much it costs to maintain an app?

Me : Well that depends. What are you planning to do?

Friend: Something like Trivago. But small.

Me: That still doesn't tell me anything

Friend: Come on. Just give a number. How hard can it be?

Me: 42. *facepalm*

Friend: See wasn't that hard. Was it?

Me: *thinking* Don't correct him. Just let him be.

This genius made his very own super-flexible-and-versatile-never-seen-before-mvc-framework, with no documentation about the code, instead of just donwloading and implementing a popular one.

He left the company.

I maintain it.

Fell my pain.

When you're a junior sysadmin but still have to maintain ALL the production server:

How it looks:

$ sudo apt-get update

How it feels:

& sudo [ $[ $RANDOM % 6 ] == 0 ] && rm -rf / || echo *Click*

Just got a job description from a recruiter with this little gem:

"maintain internet using MS Visual Studio"

If I have to use VS to keep your internet up, your company has some serious technical challenges ahead.

We use emojis to maintain pull request status in a Slack channel

Fucktards sending me screenshot of their code to debug why the fuck can't you maintain a git repository.

when you had to maintain some stranger's shitty codebase, and you couldn't resist looking up his name on LinkedIn, then you found his profile which says he is a Rockstar coder

A friend of mine has a PC that was overheating. His solution: Dumping the entire mobo and components in a box with Olive oil.

Pros:
+ Decrease heat by 15℃
+ Low cost solution

Cons:
- Hard to maintain components
- Dust can't be cleaned from the box
- House smells like an Italian kitchen 😂

I can maintain your shitty legacy node 6 code
And the shitty m3 ec2 instance with Ubuntu 16 that it runs on
And another one with postgres 9
But if I have to make a powerpoint presentation, I am jumping ship.
A man has his limits

Trying to maintain legacy code

Yay, another item to tick off the bucket list.

- fall asleep during a zoom call ☑️

I think I've hit the point of being so burnt out, even self consciousness is hard to maintain.

Hi ceo_candidate:

Welcome to CEO 101:

Q: How do you impress shareholders?
A: Without understading any processes, I cut down half of the IT team, saving a few 100k a year. Adding stress to the remaining team that now has to maintain lots of extra stuff. But, who cares? I still will expect my deliverables on time.

That is correct!

Achievement unlocked: Advanced CEO Practices

Manager: I like nested ifs

Dev: They can be difficult to maintain

Manager: No they aren’t I write them all the time!

Dev: Have you ever maintained one?

Manager: No, I don’t do code maintenance. I don’t have time for it.

To the folks who maintain moment.js; if you're reading this, thank you!

Fuck relationships, the only relationship I can have and maintain is with my Linux or in my databases.

I'm in grade 9.
I started a programming club in my school.
I told them that I'd teach basic HTML,JS,CSS,C++,C,Java.
Nobody signed up.
Because it happens on Thursdays.
FML.
However, people told other people that I have wicked programming skills and so one of the school staff asked me to help them maintain their school website, which is currently just Google Sites (*vomit).
:(

NEVER ACCEPT to be the ONLY DEV in the company who knows the whole product!

I am in the position of being the only one who knows all modules, there are even modules I developed which no one else will be able to maintain as soon as I leave the company, which I am planning right now and this also makes me getting depressed about.

Yeah sure, you can have your site files and database. Host it yourself. Get your cousin to maintain it. Go ahead. Yeah, sure, you're gonna do ~really~ well. Bye bye, ya micro-managing fuck nugget :D

I've just started to maintain a project and...

I see a farmer who wants to work less, he automates his work by using new tools - shovels, tractors, to the point that he has to invest similar amount of time to maintain these tools

I’m happiest about code I deleted.

Deleted code is easy to maintain, easy to read and it makes applications run faster.
Moreover applications take less disk space and are faster to download.

The more happy than about deleted code I’m about deleted software or destroyed computers.

Don't be lazy and work in your code as someone else has to maintain it.

Dear Developers,

A. Please put your fucking functions in files with names related to the purpose of the functions.

B. Don't define your database management methods in your goddamn configuration file.

C. In addition, fucking document your shit at the top of the file if you refuse to abide by request A.

Someone is going to maintain or modify this code after you, and that person will have a hell of a time with it.

Just my $.02:

One thing I think a lot of students/schools miss when learning/teaching, is that your code has to be *maintainable*. Your code is (hopefully) going to be used for a long time, so program it to make it not only easy to upgrade and maintain, but easy for SOMEONE ELSE to upgrade and maintain, too.

The best code to work with is the stuff that's been coded with maintainability in mind.

For those of you who are blessed with being able to use new technologies, enjoy it. I just got handed another system to maintain.. last comment in the code was written in 1995.

When I'm forced to maintain a C project having recently done a lot of C++:

Compiler: Declaration may not appear after executable statement in block.

Me: dEcLarAtiOn mAy NoT aPpeaR aFtER eXeCuTAblE stAtEmEnt iN BloCk. *pffffttt*

did you ever have to maintain a code that is so bad that it makes you physically ill to look at it? i feel like I've seen an eldritch horror

1. Refactor shitty code because it is hard to maintain
2. Rant about how can someone write a code like that
3. Check commit log to see who is the person to blame
4. Found out that's me

Me : Never actually worked on Linux before.

Also me : Tries to create, host and maintain a LAMP server.

So.. the software team I work with still maintain Java 6 apps.. meanwhile management keep asking when we're "moving to the cloud".

DevRant posts are too small for me to describe our technical debt.... 🤦

My friend was approached by a client who insisted that his website should be in WordPress to facilitate future maintainability.

That's how y'all end up having to maintain those awful pieces of mess. Blame the client, not the developer.

>me on first day as temporary scrum master
>gets invited to 'optional' scrum master meeting
>meeting is with all SMs globally
>at 6PM local time
>POs also joining because why
>first topic is discussing a defect
>a PO has stroke of genoius
>"Our code base would be much easier to maintain if it didn't have bugs!"
>this gonna be a long meeting

Guy: - Why the hell do you keep adding new tests with "TDD" in the commit log? Is this because you're wearing this stupid TDD t-shirt!? You're only supposed to maintain this! There's nothing to develop! Nothing here will ever be test-driven!

Cprn: (turns around)

T-shirt: *Technical Debt Development*

The goal of 2018 is to contribute to at least 100 open source repositories at GitHub and maintain the track record.

It's nice wanting to follow the best practice but many Java programmer have the bad habit to overdo it making lasagna code which causes painful headaches to who needs to maintain it afterwards. This is just a little sample of the "paranoia driven development" many does in my company.

Coffee helps me maintain my “never killed anyone streak”

The moment when you as an apprentice have to maintain the code of a java web application which was mostly written in 2004 with java 1.4.....
The most terrible part is that the production environment runs still java 1.7 and you think about the fancy java 8 features all the time😐😑😐

When you're asked to maintain some code that has no comments whatsoever...

Hey, how about we boost our dev team morale by giving them this cool project instead of these usual crud bullshit they deal everyday?

Nooo, let's pay some fucking amateur agency 5x they wage during 4 months to do it like a low IQ noob and expect them to maintain it later.

When the impostor syndrome hits me, I try to remember my achievements :
- I won a national coding contest when I was 18,
- I made and still maintain a complex app for 15 years, still actively used,
- I cannot count the number of languages I know; too many of them...

Not bragging here, btw. It's just important to actually enumerate your achievements.
If you get hit by the IS, just remember what you did 😉.

I left uni in 2005 clutching my shiny new .NET based degree, and was instantly hired by a local software firm... to maintain their legacy Turbo Pascal systems.

Ilove wordpress, its small, fast and easily configurable and very enjoyable to work with and maintain.

I also like pineapple on my pizza, stubbing my toe and getting ran over by a truck.

Boss left. Now I'm the only c# developer left to maintain 137 projects at this company. I woke up to a flood of emails with 3 requests and 2 applications breaking because he was a shitty programmer and didn't understand layering and design patterns and unit testing. Fucking dear God help.

So, apparently the legacy code I'm told to maintain at work requires me to add a windows user via control panel to my PC for SQL database to work.

1. Success in supporting my wife for her personal goals

2. Quality time with my family, especially with my daughter

3. Maintain my current brain abilities

During job interview
Me : Am I going to maintain old solution?
Interviewer : Of course not.

2nd day
PM : Please fetch project X from SVN

Python. Ok, so it's a really cool language, as a scripting language it's awesome, quick to write.

When it's been used to make full fledged oop programs that you suddenly have to maintain things like duck typing become problematic. Looking at an object fuck knows what methods are available. Worse still when some bastard that thinks he's being clever doesn't bother declaring any object attributes and instead overrides the __set_attr method to dynamically add them as they are used there is no hope for the poor sod that has to maintain it later.

I've also now worked out I'm at least the 3rd person having been given the task of maintaining it, i spent a day changing CLI options wondering why they didn't do anything but occasionally crash the app. I've now found a few thousand lines deep that someone had hard-coded these values because they couldn't work out where to get the CLI args from!

I've gained a new appreciation for nominative, strictly typed languages.

When your boss tells you that you are going to develop and maintain an old legacy architecture

Arch Linux is so overrated. Just a little while ago I did pacman -Syu and dhcpcd broke. Bleeding edge is all fine with me, but at least MAINTAIN THE FUCKING DISTRO PROPERLY!!!
Well, guess I'll have to redeploy that LXC with a different OS then. Probably Ubuntu Server or something like that.

software development is like marriage, easy to start hard to maintain

Windows, if you can't even do as much as mounting network shares *after* the network comes up, don't you fucking dare to tell me that I can't disable my firewall. Some people may actually know what they're doing and maintain that elsewhere, you know?

The guy that developed this template redefined every bootstrap class and now i have to maintain it... kill me please

Y'all ever notice how the size and complexity of a project is a source of pride for those whom created the project, and a source of dread for those who need to maintain it?

Metaprogramming maybe easy to write but is so fucking hard to read and harder to maintain. Why do people even like these dynamic languages anyway :-/

*a very loud and miserable groan which may be cry for help*

I hate my life right now.

CERN can collide subatomic particles but cannot maintain their website. Drupal fail.

One guy left the company and left me nodeJS project to maintain. It has a file with just a few lines short of 1700 lines of code.

A friend of mine who just started work as an Applications Developer. One of his duties is to I quote "Create and maintain inventory, which may include hardware, software and various items such as toners and peripheral equipment"

We had a good laugh together.

I maintain two WooCommerce plugins on wordpress.org. Yesterday I had to update one plugin and let me tell you one thing.

SVN sucks.

The motherfucking piece of shit is slow and suck ass. My Dad uses git, WordPress why don't you move on. Please for god sack, Move to git.

Got a new website i should maintain... Code is a real mess... Why did some kids do something - it breaks my heart^^
The directory hasnt any seperate folder except the img-folder - css,html and js are inside the root dir...

i kinda hate my job, but i also enjoy my job. i hate that I'm overworked, i like being recognized for my competence. i hate the bosses, love my colleagues. i hate the shitty code i have to maintain, but i love making something better to substitute it.

My dev Golas for 2019:

1. Control the chaos in the startup.
2. Go on trip or trekking
3. Lose at least 10 kg. (currently 83 kg)
4. Start waking up before 9 o clock
5. Help maintain a open-source library.
6. Make a open-source library.

I maintain a service that people are billed yearly for. A bunch of users just requested a new feature that will require me to build a completely new backend and change a bunch of things that will require a full rewrite of a couple different aspects of the service. I'm both excited and scared. Wish me luck.

The worst part has to be you always compromise on your health just because your brain is telling you to solve a code block. You ignore your basic necessities, resulted in irregular patterns of sleep, skipping food and so much more.

Trying to maintain code which was written long back and alot of it has deprecated.

Yes you need to sit your ass down and write the whole thing again.

Have any JabbaScripters ever heard of backwards compatibility?

Nope. Because all the shit on NPM is written by 15-year olds who don't know how to code properly, not to say maintain their packages.

Fuck you.

I love it to maintain old unit tests which were not executed for about 5 years. 2/197 are green (╯ ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)╯┻━┻

People: Uhhhhh CSS is such a bad language it's impossible to maintain it, the cascade is stupid
Also people:

If you're the alone maintaining them, you learn a lot.... But they increase responsibilities.

I started with 1 open source project 2.5 years back. Today I'm maintaining more than 20 OS projects. And believe me it's really difficult to support them, maintain them

First few times being made to make mobile responsive emails (from scratch, not generators) was an utter psychedelic mess I never wish to have the pleasure of returning too.

I since have had the pleasure of refusing this, as being able to maintain this chaotic mess created which has to be able to work across the major email clients is just a living nightmare.

There’s hell, then there’s a whole other level.

I maintain some of the top 10 most downloaded packages in the Javascript ecosystem - in the order of hundreds of millions of downloads a week. I've worked with hundreds of repositories, thousands of OSS developers, across a few dozen teams (professionally). I've seen just about all of it, for almost 10 years now.

With all that being said, I'll leave it at this:

I hate every facet of the Javascript ecosystem.

Just noticed my boss turned a nice and beautiful polymorphic code into a fucking hard to maintain switch case that now this mother fucker here has to maintain just because he probably thought it was too hard to understand.

I bet he finds it hard to fuck his wife in any way other than the one she needs to wear a strap on and tear his ass apart...

I like coding in a way that anyonr who comes into my code base can understand whats going on. That way more people can maintain the code base.

However, I HATE having people in my code base. Since they leave shit undocumented, and have 10 variables called "data" "items" "o" "p" and another 20 methods called "processData" "convertItem".

> Tells client, if content isn't hosted on their server somewhere, we'll have to update the app every time they need new content

> Client refuses saying it will take too much time and effort to maintain

*Several weeks later*

> Get email from client asking to update the app because content is out of date

> I want to reply with 'Sorry no can do, it will take too much time and effort to maintain'

I was given a project by someone to maintain

Most of us can and have gotten freelance work before, but I've only met a couple of alleged full time freelancers, and the idea has always fascinated me. For those of you who actually are able to pull it off, what's a typical day like, and how do you maintain a steady stream of clients?

Am I the only one here who doesn't maintain a GitHub profile?

So the US Congress decided that the online privacy of it's citizens do not matter. What steps do you guys take to maintain your privacy ? I can't even convince my friends to stop using fb messenger and move onto Signal.

Just because you can do things in one line and throw in ternary operators everywhere, doesn't mean you should.. other people will touch your code. Make it readable instead of making it harder to maintain

Team of developers suggest one of our legacy services is a nightmare to maintain, terrible to develop on top of and is fundamentally wrong in terms of data and application structure.

They are 100% correct and I fully endorse their request to redevelop it.

I'm less enthusiastic that their new version is much worse than the original...

So some client has their own server with their website that we made and maintain.

Recently they've revoked writing permissions for our user for whatever reason but expect us to change stuff.

This has been the case for a few weeks now and they still haven't given us writing permission back, but insist of us making the changes.

Aha. Worked hard to maintain a reputation on SO. Mail came yesterday saying all my upvotes were fake, and suspended my account.

Gotta love when you have something breaking because of an interface you have to maintain for a subcontractor for some shit that never should have been subcontracted in the first place and the problem is an obscure error caused by a Microsoft product that you're only using because the other Microsoft product you were using is no longer supported. So I guess what I am saying is fuck subcontractors, fuck Microsoft, and fuck tlb files

I: Do you have any questions for us?
Me: How do you maintain an AGILE development team?
I: Have you heard of TRELLO

triGGERRED

Go to the vacation.

Return back to see all those useless features that should not be part of the MVP, that I have previously rejected multiple times, poorly implemented...

Now we have to maintain this shit, that nobody even uses in real life...

Fucking imaginary use cases...

Backend Dev: Sir, I think we have a problem with our code. The function does have a lot of bugs in production that we can't maintain it.

Manager: Okay Front-end. You get a new Ticket. Prevent this bug by today

Front-end: Dafuck

Sometimes, I feel sorry for my colleague.

Half fact: Code reviews help to maintain clean codebases.
Full fact: Code reviews are a way to find out who secretly wants you fired.

(1) Datetimes. Seriously, fuck 'em.

(2) Everybody always thinking: Come on, that little feature is so simple. It couldn't possibly take a whole week to develop.

(3) Nobody really caring or understanding or forgetting after you've told them that if you cut corners and do something the dirty way, it adds to the effort and time needed to maintain or build new features.

So one of the apps I develop and maintain is going to get penetration tested.

I recieved an email if I could whitelist all their ips so they could get acces to the system. Without any further details.

Like wtf? Arent you supposed to be testing if you can get acces xD

Next thing they will be asking passwords and keys xD and if I could build in a backdoor.

All those complaints about having to maintain the shitty code the last developer left behind...

I work on a new project Monday. Modern stack on a platform I have no knowledge about. No one else more experienced to work with. I AM THAT LAST DEVELOPER!!!

from time to time i find it hard to organize my personal life. it appears that i forget stuff that does not seem important to me or just not interested in.
apart from my full time job i own a small business and try to maintain a more or less social life (as social as i can get with my dev background).

can you recommend any tools that you use to keep everything in line?

I was assigned to maintain the website as full stack dev but the code from backend is horrible previous devs didn't use SOLID principle, DRY, KISS, or Design patterns. I had to adjust from OOP mindset to Procedural its hard to debug in this state.

Client hasn't paid since April last year. Now wants to engage another company to maintain my site. Kill switch?

Always write your code like the person who will maintain it is an axe murderer who knows where you live.

Funny how this company implements policies like a big enterprise when we only maintain three small apps

Called to maintain a WordPress site. Site has 100 plugins, two to disable right click. Somebody kill me already 😂😂😂

!devrant

So today my CTO reigned, and I heard rumours that they probably will have me as the next CTO. Me personally, I'm not ready for this ... Even as a Senior Software Engineer , sometimes I have obstacles leading the my Juniors (6 of them).

Also, for the same pay, I rather maintain my current position.

I am not ready yet.

You either die a hero, or you live long enough to maintain a legacy code base.

If I were cooking like I maintain my dev projects, I'd have a roast in the fridge, a frittata thats only missing the eggs, eight different pots of uncooked soup around the kitchen and the ingredients for a pudding in the cupboard. But I'd be eating pasta with a ready-made soup every day, because its finished.

god i despise these "javascript is bad" articles. everyone seems to be jumping onto that train ever since the WAT talk.

javascript is a *weakly* typed language with implicit type conversions, that's why `{} + []` gives you `0`.

it is not easy to be the most widely used language, and to maintain compatibility across varying platforms.

please think twice before dismissing hard work.

/rant

My boss just told me he likes copying and pasting because "it's easier to maintain"

I honestly don't care what you think about HTML or CSS, but if you think you are too good for it and IF I see you using <br> for margins, sticking everything inside divs or writing CSS that makes my eyes bleed, then I hope you get to maintain a codebase like that one day. The only thing worse than bad code is an ignorant dev. Don' be that guy.

I take a colleague's project... and find this. How? Why? It was a small feature and now I have to maintain it. Fuck!

I've been asked by my manager to document my TypeScript project with more than a hundred .ts files such that "someone with no programming background should be able to maintain it."

I should get paid as a textbook author.

When someone hiring you for an internship harasses you to maintain your code after the contract's duration...
Just stop treating me like a customer service and get on with your project man

Creator of the react router:

If you ever see this, you created one of the greatest library with one of the worst documentation ever.

And don't get me started with versions. In every single versions, you break everything so badly and nothing works anymore.

Everytime I need to do something related to react router, I just fucking roll on the floor and cry. Documentation is fucked up.

It's totally fucked up. In the github there's one documentation, in the website there's a different. At the end, nothing works.

Please, if you want to create a nice library like this, maintain it. If you can't maintain it, mark it as deprecated and someone will take over.

But keeping something like this and making it absolutely inconsistent doesn't help. I am really tired of debugging bugs related to react-router

I was told the other dev hadn't enough time anymore to maintain this 20-year-old project, because he did it in his free time and we should transition from working together, learning the code, etc to me maintaining the whole thing with the other dev providing the knowledge about his program.

So, we had one meeting where I got the current state of the program and never really heard from the other dev again.

This thing was written in C and quite a mess (it still is, who needs refactoring...) and I have never programmed in C before. Needless to say, I learnt a lot.

How many of you fellow devRanters out there have a blog? And, more importantly, actively maintain it?

I help maintain software that services thousands of users across millions of dollars of infrastructure.

My resolve is stronger than steel during a production outage.

Plex goes down for 1 minute at home and my toddler loses it, and I'm a fucking wreck.

Wtf is wrong with me?!

My first job and the amount of bad code I had to work with influenced my coding style a lot.
One thing is reading about bad examples. Another thing is it to maintain these bad examples.

Programming is like sex: one mistake and you have to maintain it all your life 👨🍼

HTML is the core building block of the web. Why does everyone feel the need these days to abstract and virtualize and recreate the wheel? You’re only slowing down your site...plus adding layers of confusion for new comers and adding more code to maintain.

I told you it'll never work. If one .50BMG bullet is enough to destroy the entire tube thing, we have a deal-breaker. Not to mention large vacuum chambers are a bitch to maintain.

Wow, Issues on GitHub are really a good way to maintain a descriptive TODOs for your personal project

When you work with other developers who would, for any feature, small or large, plop in a new library or framework of which they will utilize 1% of... I'm talking about things that we could develop in house in less than a day and have significantly less code bloat... and when you tell them this they smile, nod, and say yeah gotchu, and continue on... AND YOU HAVE TO MAINTAIN THE DAMN THING.

When java was facing extinction, during the JavaScript, Node, and reactive programming hype. It did what it had always done. just adapt to the hype and maintain backward compatibility. We can all learn a thing or two from the humble java. It never rushes, it's patient. Be calm and wait before you hype yourself.

Just got an internship in a big company. Related to web development but they want me to use/maintain legacy jsp, servlet code. Should I take it? There are other departments too but I have been put in this shitty one.

I don't know why they made so many algorithms, data structures and big O questions during interview, when all they wanted me to do was to maintain some legacy, tight coupled, spaghetti code with no architecture, documentation, tests nor any kind of engineering behind :/

CTO/CEO (previous place) - we're not production engineers, so we're going to fork your code base and move way faster than all of you and then you can maintain it. Doesn't that sound inspiring?

25% of the company: ha... Here's our 2 week notice.

Using JavaScript... (we combine JS and c++ and I love c++ ... definitely not JS)
It is such a mess to maintain and work with and I never had any propensity or interest towards web development.. especially JS

My new team mates type in the date and time of commit on their commit messages and maintain code only on master branch. Some people deserve have their write access revoked.

I would not contribute anymore just to maintain this in my GitHub page 😁

One more startup proposal
And
I accept it

$500

One condition

I will not maintain anything.

Plot twist : it was my toy project
Every week I will show progress.

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

This is very long along. Senior Developer was doing my code and telling the best way to write jQuery and PHP codes.

The funny part is that he doesn't know anything about PHP and whatever jQuery code he told me to correct was very shitty and difficult to maintain.

That's when I knew. This world is fucked up!

Home hack
Made a stylus with Reynolds butterflow and ear bud.
Just have to slightly moisten the ear bud.
And have to maintain contact with the silver part of the nib cover.

When you are at home and busy and your boss need you to maintain some code.

EVEN IF YOU ARE DEAD

Old Boss from my year internship before I started my apprenticeship:
"It would be nice if you could maintain your written software even if you arent working here anymore"
Me: "Yeah. I'll try my best"
Boss: "Cool"
Me: "We Can use git, so I Can manage my Code better and you Can easily track everything"
Boss: "Ehh what? Don't understand"
Me:" .. Ok. We will use GitHub, so you Can See and create issues, I will maintain Code and so on"
Boss: "Yeah, graphical Interface Sounds good. .. Make it private. Here is my Account. Invite me please"
Me: "Invited you. You should Receive an email. Alternatevly you Can follow These steps *writes Long text, and describe How to use GitHub*
Boss: "*a week later* How Can I Log in into GitHub?"
Me: "..."

My idea of hell is being forced forever to maintain a prestashop website with hundreds of under-documented, readily obsolete, mutually conflicting, and most often useless modules.

Explaining difficult things in a way that they are understandable by non-expert audiences.

This helps a lot to focus on simplicity when programming. And simple means it'll get understood by your peer programmers, it is simpler to test and it will be easier to maintain, and so on...

Let me tell all of you who don't like big frameworks..
The nice thing about them is that they minimize the amount of SHIT CODE all of you who think you know how to code, but actually don't, write..
And minimizes the amount of headache for the devs who need to then maintain/fix/change your SHIT CODE.

yes...lets put routes 10 dirs deep into the project and let ppl look for it..

Finding out, for whatever reason, Microsoft decided not to include IdnMapping in the Silverlight Client runtime and spending 3 hours building a filthy hack via the RIA Service to do something that normally takes one line of code.
Then realising you still have to maintain a Silverlight project and cry some more.

Every data communication example has Alice and Bob communicating with each other. I wonder after all these years how are they able to maintain a stable relationship.
I wish my girlfriend understood this.

i'll be the one who maintain the A.I

Person 1 to me: Website C needs this update.

Me: I don’t maintain that site. I only maintain websites A and B. I don’t know who does maintenance for your site.

Person 2 to me: Website D needs this update.

Me: I only maintain websites A and B.

Person 3 to me: Website E needs this update.

Aaaahhhhh 😫😡

So I've been learning by doing node/express/angular stuff for the past 3 months at this startup.
Apparently the boss outsourced a web app for our newest project which i am to maintain upon delivery.
It's written in php.

When you don't comment code that someone else has to maintain.

Well... Someone has to maintain our new A.I. overlords, right? 😬

Too much technical debt
Write more unit tests
Unit tests failing, the code will be right so change the tests to pass
Too many unit tests to maintain, they look a lot like technical debt
Remove unit tests to reduce maintenance overhead

But Why ??
Saw this I a project that my company wanted me to fix and maintain. There are more hilarious things like this. (I will keep you updated)
and I am finding things like this in the code.

Best: Got my first real job

Worst: Had to maintain an 8 year old java/jsf nightmare of a project

Complete disaster. As a C++ dev I was assigned to maintain some Python applications (some of them acting as proxies, wtf) just because the original authors left the team. It's slow as hell and it's not even a product - it's a helper tool. Cannot rewrite because nobody will give a green light for that. Why? Why?!

A programme I have to maintain (and not allowed to optimise or change):

1) read input from serial connection
2) store data in MySQL database
3) every day convert to CSV
4) store on Windows file share
5) process CSV in access 2000
6) store in MsSQL database

When it was first developed, I said to te developer to store it straight from serial to MsSQL but out boss wanted it to follow the above spec.

He has now left and I have to maintain it

NEVER maintain multiple release branches as a maintainer, period.

Given enough PRs, nobody, not even god-tier maintainers, is able to keep track of all commits and the whole context/story behind it.

Remember that people ALWAYS PR against your master and nobody even cares about your whatever-named-next-branch buried deep inside your feature branches.

Please make it easy for others if you want actual contributions.

48 boolean variables.
For real?

It's clear why the class name is "GameHardActivity", this certainly is hard to maintain, understand, edit, and believe.

I can understand people learning, but with 2 years of experience in programming??? And there's a matrix right in the middle!!!! USE ARRAYS, PLEASE!!!!

What's worse than WordPress? WordPress + WooCommerce! What's worse than WordPress + WooCommerce? WordPress + WooCommerce + PayPal! What other more shitty software could we possibly add? Some malicious virus hidden somewhere in the millions of free WordPress plugins most of which are not even full open-source? Who can possibly review and maintain that rummage table of outdated crap code?

Its good and practical but those who aim to fill gaps in the programming industry by trying to produce "programmers on demand" via a several month long bootcamp are complete idiots. Nobody can learn to develop a well structured application that's easy to maintain in a couple of months, either that is frontend or back end. We are trying to be engineers , not just solve problems.

Hello and welcome come to hell for developers. Take a seat at any open computer.
You may have noticed we did away with the fire and brimstone.
Instead we just have you maintain the legacy code from your first job.
It's genrally html, php, javascript, and css all on the same page and all mixed together.
We would say have fun, but that's not really the point.

My biggest sin is overshooting the problem - developing something "with the future in mind" which ends up way more complicated than it should be.
It works, works great, but nobody can maintain it because of the complexity, and because I usually write no comments in these situations.

But hey! At least I'm aware of it and working on fixing it in me.

Finally leaving a job that I've been working at. All we did was maintain a codebase that was originally built as a prototype by an intern, with no hopes of getting a green light on refactoring or rewriting. So glad I'm no longer part of that mess. Don't know why I'm writing this but it's just like a weight has lifted off my shoulders.

Get an issue reported today stating that a report can't be submitted in a product we maintain. Taking their word for it I start investigating on our local copy of the product. Everything works as intended. Ok... strange. Take a look at the production copy aaaaand it was submitted. No issues at all.

Note to self. Don't believe the client.

I have to maintain a system for a financial institution that only works with Windows XP and Ms Access 2003. All VBA code, security is handled using a workgroup file. Can't upgrade anything because client doesn't want to pay for it.

Code Written few months ago: Hello, I have a bug inside me.

Me: Do I know you?

Don't ask me to maintain code written in the past

Ngl, I'd probably become one of those guys that tries to port DOOM onto things, or maybe maintain some old repos. Maybe fuck around and actually write a unit test idk

Maintain an up to date resume and work portfolio. Contribute to open source projects. Network with other professionals. Pursue professional development.

Am i the only one who really wants a chat and follow option on DevRant?
I find it very uncomfortable to maintain long comment threads of 20+ comments especially when you're discussing with a single other ranter on a certain issue :/

Personal mini-project from a million years ago which I practically don't maintain anymore, broke. External APIs are being bitches.
Made a fix, but I'm too lazy to push. (I don't think anyone else is using it tbh)
Huehuehue.

Other people.

Seriously how you wrote that shit I have to implement/maintain.

Being handed an old system to maintain with scant documentation, and being expected to understand exactly how it works.. FFS It looks like a bunch of monkeys on acid got into the codebase 😣 I doubt even they knew what this fucking code does, and they wrote it!

I have stopped Windows updates in my laptop. But no windows has to do some shit in order to maintain its reputation. Every 10 min I get this pop up.

R.I.P John Doe

He made the mistake of writing unmaintainable code then leaving the team.
I just heard of his passing.
He was brutally beaten to death by the new maintainer. Now the maintainer is behind bars.
And now I've been asked to maintain it.

R.I.P Me as well I guess

Joke of course.

I want to spend about 10 minutes a day in to small code brain teasors.

I know there are apps like SoloLearn. I don't want to learn hard new concepts but rather just maintain the basic ones. I am looking for an app that gives me quizes, not just informational text

What would u recommend?

Prettier formatter, AirBnB linter.

Prettier defaults to double quotes for strings. AirBnB loves it some single quotes. Would probably be able to change the configuration in order to maintain sanity *now*, but when I was a newbie dev, I was given a repo with AirBnB linting built in after being recommended Prettier.

It was not fun times.

how in the fsck is it possible that people like us can maintain a fleets of servers, create the most amazing applications that drive the world economy, but not figure out how in the mother fsckin world to make our girlfriends iphones backup to icloud. don't bury the shit i want to do under 10 fucking layers of option screens and shit ui because you think your customers are too dumb. apple fail.

nextjs is cancer framework. Shit so muddied together u cant maintain this shit. Random errors u have no idea where they coming from. Oh my God the hydration and useContext errors! Fuck them. Fuck nextjs

How can I be useful for the senior developer in my team?

I'm a junior developer and to senior developer I ask questions and do the delegated work. Are there other ways I can be useful to my seniors?

One of my seniors also mentors me I want maintain monthly 1:1s but not sure what to ask him each time.

All code and no tests makes a software buggy, hard to maintain and a pain in the ass to work with.

So, the future of Apple is ARM, huh? So people are gonna have to maintain, like, SEVEN toolchains for Mac? What, we've got one or two for Mac OS <10.0, 2 PPC OSX chains that are version-dependent, 2 x86 version-dependent x86, Catalina x86 and now Catalina ARM too?

(These are to memory, if i'm wrong please correct me.)

Yoga! Helps me to maintain a sound mental health. As a result analytical thinking becomes more enjoyable and less stressful.

Mentoring someone in iOS from scratch, then teaching him how to maintain 3 different apps. He is able to maintain them without me now which is testament to how well I taught him, but it was challenging. Especially since I had to simultaneously work on other tickets and live prod issues.

I see people posting pictures of computers (ATMs, ad screens, digital signs, instruments, etc) failing and instead showing some Windows function, update, or the desktop. Makes me wonder: WHY would you use Windows this way? Think of how many product keys you'll have to buy and how many systems you'll need maintain to show a stupid sign? There's GOT to be a cheaper way of doing things like this.

Fucking incompetent manager.
I could spend my time trying to convince him about the leaner, faster way to launch.
But in order to maintain my own sanity and peace of mind, I have decided to let him screw up the project. Time to plan for an exit.

The shit code I wrote before my cs degree is marginally better than the shit code I write now. The lack of of improvement is related to the shit job I got after my degree. Cs degree did teach me a lot of good oo concepts and design.... That I rarely use due to shit legacy code I maintain.

Hosting Rails is such a pain in the butt.

Heroku, too expensive
DigitalOcean, hard to maintain unless using Hatchbox (Hatchbox, too expensive)
Shared cPanel hosting, too limited, too slow...

I'm setting my own server home from scratch just so I can master fucking Rails deployment.

That moment when you join an organization and your job is to maintain and update their website, but their past web developers didn't indent any of their HTML and CSS code, and their class names are all very vague...

I took a job to maintain (for the near future) a VB6 app and rewrite it in .NET.

Mainly because it's not in the financial sector. Which sectors do you work in and which do you enjoy/prefer?

JEZUZ CHRIST FOR GODS SAKE MOFO FRAMEWORK DEVELOPERS ... if you've built an awesome framework once, you have ONLY ONE JOB: maintain it - keep it up to date with fucking browser changes and fix security holes. Changing the core concepts every major is not part of this. If you got visions, start a new one ffs, become a mofo prophet one OR BURN IN HELL POWERED BY THE REMAINS OF YOUR ANCESTORS FFS!

Nobody wants to maintain XSLT mappings. Being a developer, even I don't want to. So what do we do? We parse the XSLT using JAVA code in a horrible attempt create an excel with mappings. God damn it!!

Got accepted as a part-time FE developer in a well-known company.

Reality check: all I do is maintain a horribly formatted spaghetti code (20k+ lines in a file) using ancient tech like PL/SQL, prototypeJS and IE11.

Buy hey, at least I know some SQL magic now.. Right?!

yo imagine if the most common and best toolchain for, say, Intel PCs was "mid-source": You can have the buildscripts, and a few extra seldom-useful bits, but nothing else.

Welcome to devkitPro: it's too hard to maintain a toolchain package for all the systems you develop on, so we'll maintain a modded copy of pacman you HAVE to use to get the only toolchain for Nintendo consoles for all systems. Oh, and it's not normal pacman, no, it's hardcoded to only be used for their shit.

Even on Windows.

why do they do this to us again?

What's worse than no comments? Outdated comments.

If you won't maintain your comments, I'd rather you don't comment at all. We are all better off for it.

How do you guys maintain your body posture? My spine is becoming more and more 'S' everyday..

for the life of me I cannot figure out in my mind how to structure this project I want to start, and jumping right into coding does not improve this mental block.

At work this Golang code base has a clean architecture, so easy to maintain and extend, and I'm unable to replicate it on my own project(s). It sucks to be an ignorant.

I bonded a lot with a co-worker over the last several months as I had to mentor him in iOS and how to maintain our apps. We mostly bonded over how much we hate Objective-C and the management of the project. Now we are buying Christmas presents for eachother. Bad code brings people together

It was a little Java Swing Application for my friend who had to maintain a little notebook for his insulin values.
The device he used to read his values, saved them as a csv-file, so it was pretty easy to map them to a readable format, so he didn't have to maintain that notebook.

He never used the App. He got an implant that manages it for him.

I recently entered a new job as a software developer for a hot-in-market startup, and they are offering a huge amount of money to maintain just one app

The reason why they are offering that much money is because it is a hybrid app written in closurescript, they are willing to pay for learning closure but just maintain the app

So yay?

Let me tell you a story about an independent contractor who was just told the reason I don’t have enough information to build, deploy, access, or test the software I was brought on to maintain…

is that the previous developer is holding all documentation essentially “hostage” in an attempt to squeeze more payment out of the client. What the tap-dancing shit have I gotten myself in to.

Hated that Android 8.0 (Oreo) and above for killing backend Services very effectively without giving a proper documentation on how to handle it or how to properly maintain and restart the Service without the user to turn on the app. Digging solutions for months and still till today I am totally clueless...

It’s Christmas time so I drink during work to maintain my cheer levels

they are official premium reseller of apple product. Even can't maintain contact form. ~{-_-}~

Some of the software companies haunt their former employees to maintain the projects they worked on before leaving them, even if these companies know they have a full-time new job.